#[ 𖦹 vent... ]

[aqquafina]

Hai guys first post on here since deleting my other jirai blog!!!!!! Tried to kill myself two days ago ^_^ did nawt work but i knew it wouldnt. I fucked that up too

[moegutzz]

my body feels so weird i hate being human i hate existing why is this feeling i dont feel like i exist why do we exist why is this so random i don't like this it's weird i don't feel like my body exists i have realized my body exists oh i don't like this kill me i want to gouge out my eyes and bash my head in i can feel the fact that i exist i hate it

[dull-jemstone]

i might be a bit more upset about the first incident than id like to admit given i still think about it when its been almost a year...

thinking about my friends being annoyed at me makes me feel so sick that i get dizzy and my brain does it so often it's basically a routine

[glowingpyre]

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

a kiss or a punch, darling, ill take anything you'll give me

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

[shiftingwithkit]

guys i’m like actually going insane. you ever feel so strongly for your drs??? like as if no one else could ever understand how deeply you adore your s/o(s) and how much you love the atmosphere and the environment??? and the people around you?? and how healthy it all is and how much you desperately want to be there and nowhere else???because i’m gnawing at the bars of my enclosure like a fucking caged animal get me oUT OF HERE

[v4miiii]

Breaking down

It went terrible

[blueberrybeomgyu]

you ever hear someone talk and get pissed off like stop talking. stop making your presence known. matter of fact how about die

[curly-fry-3]

!vent!

can I just go ONE EFFING DAY without feeling like shit. im so done with everything. im getting my wisdom teeth out soon so I told some of my teachers that I would miss like a week cause of it and they were all like "a whole week?" like yes a whole week im having surgery. and then I bleed through my pants while I was walking home and my phone died. all I wanna do is go cry to my dad but hes at work all week and I probably won't see him :). so sorry if there is any delay in requests guys

[wallerina]

saw a post abt this earlier that triggered me and fucked me up rly bad so tw for discussions of pap smears and sexual trauma

im 21 which means im supposed to start getting pap smears but i honestly feel like id rather die im so terrified but everyones always like "its uncomfy but you have to do it" "well some people have slight discomfort but its not supposed to hurt if done properly" "its a widdle akward but its over in no time 🥰"

like no you dont understand i have cptsd and just the thought of it makes me want to very very literally kill myself. also i cant even insert a fucking pinkie finger without searing pain. so exactly how the fuck am i supposed to lay on my back with my legs spread and let a complete stranger hold my vagina apart with a speculum and then scrape my fucking insides with a tool. "they can talk you through it" oh yeah thatll fix it. ive had full blown panic attacks just thinking about it and it makes me feel sick enough to vomit id rather die. and it makes me so fucking angry too like you mean to tell me none of these motherfuckers have bothered to find a different way to do this? too busy creating erection pill number 10,000? okay

[d1tz]

Today has been an unproductive day because of this bugging thought. So I drew it. It's a vent-ish art?

Please don't mind how OOC Astarion is, I finished this at 12 AM and I am tired and in need to get my stupid thoughts out

[aqquafina]

I miss my boyfriend. I wanna talk to him so badddd i miss hearing his voice (we literally called yesterday). I need him forever and ever and ever

[moegutzz]

WHY AM I SO FUCKED UP?! WHY?! NOTHING HAS HAPPENED IN MY LIFE NOTHINH I GO THROUGH SHOULD BE ENOUGH FOR THIS THIS ISNT ENOUGH SOMEONE MUST HAVE HURT ME MAYBE EVERYONE HURT ME EVERYONE MUST HAVE HURT ME AND I JUST CANT REMEMBER THAT HAS TO BE IT PLEASE I CANT STAND BEING LIKE THIS OVER PRACTICALLY NOTHING SOMEONE MUST HAVE HURT ME SOMEONE PLEASE HURT ME SO I HAVE A REASON TO FEEL THIS WAY

[dull-jemstone]

i feel so fucking ill im going to puke

i think i just lost nearly all my friends over something that happened 6 weeks ago that they didnt tell me upset them

if they couldve told me earlier i couldve tried to help and not have ended up hurting them but they just opt for their all time favourite method: kick me out of the group chat and send me a miles long message about what ive done

[glowingpyre]

how does HE want ME.

[cosmic-message]

INTRO POST !! 👽

☆ hi !! my name is kasper (but I also occasionally go by vivi, porygon/pory, or nebby) ^w^ !! (he/xe) this blog is for all my alterhuman, selfship, nd coping mechanism stuff >.<

!! this is a sideblog!! im not comfortable with sharing my main blog but if you wanna be moots just tell me and ill make a separate mutual post lol !!

i've experienced a lot of trauma specifically in my mid-childhood (10-12, which is also the age im generally regressed to,) mainly revolving around medical stuff, bullying, and abuse. i'll probably reblog a lot of hospital or medical related things, so that's something to look out for!!

i mostly don't put it on this blog but recently iv been having reeealllyyy bad flashbacks and been rememberin stuff so possibly trigger tag for SA and SH

you can ask me about stuff if you wanna, i don't mind talking about it and sometimes itz nice to vent :>

- any vents will be properly tagged and are all located under the tag [ vent...]

- i generally miss that era of being hospitalized (since it felt super comforting to me and my dad was a lot better then,) so the tag for that stuff is # [ ✦ medical ] 4 filtering purposes!!

- sometimez i like using typing quirks (js for fun!!) ask if you need a translation or anything, i'll always provide one if needed ^_^

✦ fun stuff about me!! ✦

☆ ~ i'm transmasc and aroace !

☆ ~ i have adhd, autism, and ocd !

☆ ~ here's a list of my types / kins ;

- calico cat therian

- domestic cat copinglink

- canadian lynx copinglink

- snow leopard otherhearted

- caracal otherhearted

- alienkin

- alien cat otherkin

- shiny espeon fictionkin

- spacekin

- techkin

☆ ~ my biggest kins are ;

- peridot (steven universe) !!!!!!!

- marin dram (meow wolf - omega mart)

- morgan pastore (meow wolf - THoER)

- care (petscop)

- luz noceda (toh)

- hemera philly (sparklecare hospital)

- dipper pines (gravity falls)

- penny (pokemon S/V)

- liko (pokemon horizons)

- lana (pokemon S/M)

- moth flight (warriors)

☆ ~ current f/o list (note: none of these are romantic! also idk if pet f/o 's are a thing but they are now x3)

[⚡️=pet, ⭐️=platonic, 💜=familial]

- peridot (steven universe) ⭐️/💜

- lapis (steven universe) 💜

- goosefeather (warrior cats) ⭐️

- espeon (pokemon) ⚡️

- mimikyu (pokemon) ⚡️

- sprigatito line (pokemon) ⚡️

☆ ~ antis, aphobes, and jerks dni ! you won't enjoy yourself here, and hating on me won't make me stop c:

[clownblogz]

I don’t think I fit in with people my age. I never catch up to the latest trends in time and I try so hard to act like them but I’m not sure it comes across right. Everyone is always misunderstanding me too. I don’t get it. I just want to be normal and fit in.