#[ ACCOMPLICE: john watson ]

[moroniccats]

Watson is supposed to be hot. Holmes is supposed to look like a humanoid bird that Watson is drooling over and describes simultaneously as the strangest and most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Everyone else who sees Holmes is like: is- is that guy going to put me in a cauldron and eat me???

And Watson’s just like: I know, isn’t he gorgeous 😻

You can make Holmes and watson look like whatever you want. Anyone who says they have to be white/skinny/whatever is a loser. BUT. There is one super super important thing that you cannot ever change, which is that Watson has to be HOT. Doesn’t matter what he looks like as long as that man is a total dreamboat. If you make Holmes look cool and then make Watson a goofy looking dork, you are missing the point by a fucking mile. HOLMES is the goofy looking dork. Watson is the astonishingly handsome swoon-worthy hero in these stories and EVERYONE should have a crush on him.

[sandcobangevent]

Nobody, no body.

by @paperleef and @brother_m1ne

CHAPTER 1

“John. Know that when I leave you, it is not for my own benefit. You were on the line, John. I couldn’t in good conscience, let you be the one to bear this weight. You have been through enough, you have so much ahead of you. I, comparatively, lack the importance. Your mum, John. Your friends, your army pals, the booze brigade as you call them. Do not blame yourself when I go. I won’t be able to tell you, I will just have to go and you will have to know in your heart what I am talking about. It wasn’t you John, it was never you. I have to leave to save you, Watson. I’m sorry”

“Who are you talking to mate?”

“No one, just, the listeners.”

“You? Talking to the listeners? What have you done with the real Sherlock Holmes?”

“I am the real Sherlock Holmes?”

“Forget it, don’t worry,” John tells him. John. 

Sherlock knows it will happen. Sherlock knows he will leave John. Sherlock knows he will be forced to stand on the edge of the precipice, Sherlock knows he will realise he cannot go back and keep Watson safe, and Sherlock knows the only way off that precipice is down. He doesn’t know when, he doesn’t know how, but he does know why. Moriarty knows the only way to get to Sherlock is through John. Sherlock does not value himself, he enjoys his life but he does not place a value upon it, he places a value on Watson’s. 

Sherlock knows taking Watson on this trip with him was a bad idea, is a bad idea. He did try to convince Watson to leave, to go back to England because he had been tracked. Despite his best effort, all the hoops he had Watson jump through, he was followed, he has yet to tell Watson this, he doesn’t want to see John worry. Escaping England was best for Watson’s sake. Leave the police to deal with Moriarty. Clearly didn’t work. The police failed to catch the professor himself. And although Watson would never admit it, he blamed himself. You can see it in his eyes. They would still be in England if he never had started this podcast. Sherlock would be safe (he wouldn’t, but Watson refuses to accept that is the case.) Now he finds himself sat in an air BnB with John, waiting, planning. Deciding what to do. 

“Sherlock, do you- erm. Want to go out? Of the house, this house, that is. Erm- Moriarty probably isn’t even here. He’s probably scheming about how to get all of his… accomplices out of jail. Plus we’re in the middle of nowhere. He’s never going to know we’re out here.”

Sherlock is faced with two choices. A- Tell John that he was in fact, followed, and Moriarty could be anywhere, or B- Say yes and hope to god he can save Watson, in both ways. 

…

“Okay. But can I wear the sunglasses and the ear defenders?”

“You can wear whatever you like mate. I was thinking we go to this waterfall. It’s apparently gorgeous. And it’s only 2 miles from here, we don’t even have to leave the woods. We’ll be safe I swear.”

“Well… you were in the army. If anyone knows how to move around a wood tactically, it’s you.”

“Sherlock, for the eighteenth time I’m not teaching you military patrol and crossing.”

“Eh… worth a shot.”

They can’t help but think the walk was lovely, and well-needed. They spend it laughing about their lives, the past couple years, telling stories they should have realistically cried about, thinking of old cases, old friends, the people they’ve met. And it’s lovely, or it would be if not for the looming threat of Professor Moriarty, it would be if every time they turned a corner, Sherlock didn’t have to look around it and step out first, didn’t fear it might be the last step he takes. 

And the waterfall… well it was gorgeous. Jagged rocks with fast-flowing flowing water cascading through them, small flecks of the water circling the sky like fragile rain. John truly had outdone himself. It was everything they hoped for. They ran down to the bottom, careful not to tumble down the stairs, took their socks and shoes off and paddled in the puddle. John splashing Sherlock, Sherlock trying not to be annoyed and then laughing even harder when he splashed John back, and John found himself completely soaked through to his pants.

“Mate now I’m gonna have to walk around the house arse naked while this dries.”

“Watson, you will not be walking around the house naked. At least wear some pants.”

“My pants are wet, yeah? Soaked. There is no wa-”

A scream, a cry for help, shouting.

John’s attention immediately redirects. 

“I’m- Sherlock I-”

“Go, Watson. I'll pack this up and meet you there a minute.”

So without even putting his socks back on, John sprints. Faster than he has in a very long time, if he’s honest, faster than he thought he could, leaving Sherlock to clean everything up.

Except he didn’t. Sherlock knew it was a trick. Because it was, wasn’t it? The pitch of the scream, the area it’s coming from. It doesn’t line up. It has to be a trick. A trick by the man they’ve been waiting for, the man stood at the top of the waterfall, staring down at Sherlock.

“It was never you, Watson.” He whispers to himself as he walks up the stairs, getting closer to the man. 

“Ah… Sherlock Holmes. Nice to put a face to the name.”

“Don’t act like you haven’t seen me before.”

“Well… potato potahto, it’s a term of phrase.”

“I am aware.” 

“I am aware, of your little weak spot.”

“And what might that be?”

“Oh, nothing. Just, a certain Doctor Watson.”

--------------

“Sherlock… mate? Sherlock. Sherlock, I couldn’t find them. No one was there. I heard running, in the opposite direction. No one was there Sherlock.” John shouts, hoping he’s close enough that Sherlock can hear him. He makes it back up to the top, still unsure where Sherlock is, panic rises in his chest as he gets closer. And his heart sinks when he sees both his and Sherlock’s shoes, lined up in the very same place he left them.”

“Okay… erm. Sherlock? Sherlock this isn’t funny. Sherlock? Holmes? Sherlock?” He shouts into what feels like oblivion. He scrambles, spinning around and darting his head and eyes in every possible direction, searching for a slither of dark skin or a flash of green eyes. He turns back to his old military tactics, sure they were for self camouflage but surely they have to work for finding people? Shine, shadow, shape, shade, sound, speed, silhouette. Silhouette. The silhouettes of two people atop the falls, the silhouettes fighting, the silhouettes shouting, the silhouettes falling… falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling falling. The silhouettes splashing. The silhouettes never coming back up. The silhouette in the shape of Sherlock Holmes.

“SHERLOCK!!” John screams so loud his throat rips, “SHERLOCK.” He screams Sherlock’s name out like he's begging for forgiveness, jumps in after him, he’s neck deep in water, kicking and screaming and touching and feeling and diving and checking and looking and it’s all coming up empty. His hands are empty, his lungs burn from a lack of oxygen, his legs tire from a loss of adrenaline. And there is one one there. It came up empty, the search, Sherlock never came back up.

He’s… Sherlock Holmes is… not, here. 

Sherlock Holmes fell from a waterfall and didn’t come back up.

Sherlock Holmes is dead. 

CHAPTER 2

The anguish in John’s chest is unlike anything he’s ever felt before. It’s this tearing, ripping pain. He’s felt this love, for Sherlock, this adoration and infatuation. Sherlock Holmes is truly wonderful, Sherlock Holmes saved him. After the war when he’d lost everything, Sherlock was there. And now that love has swollen so much, and burst. It feels like blood is coating his insides, like no amount of tears will ever be able to wash away the thick warm liquid. His chest tightens and his breathing quickens and everything is wrong. It wasn’t supposed to end like this. Sherlock Holmes was the greatest mind in London, perhaps in history and… he died in such a normal way. Drowning, is what his autopsy would say, if they had a body to conduct a post-mortem on. 

John truly doesn’t believe this pain will ever go away. It doesn’t go away when he climbs out, more wet than he was before, it doesn’t go away when he calls Mariana in tears, it doesn’t go away when he calls Lestrade, it doesn’t go away on the plane, in the cab, in 221B, in Mariana's arms. It never leaves. And John knows it never will, he knows this pain will always follow him around.

And it definitely doesn't go away when he lays in bed and watches Sherlock crash through the water over and over and over like it’s some sick film. And it only aches more when he, three months later, decides to update the listeners, and it only hurts more when going through the mics files, he finds a last message from Sherlock, to the man he would never see again, to the world he would never see again, to the two best people he has ever had the pleasure of getting to know.  

“John. Know that when I leave you, it is not for my own benefit. You were on the line, John. I couldn’t in good conscience, let you be the one to bear this weight. You have been through enough, you have so much ahead of you. I, comparatively, lack the importance. Your mum, John. Your friends, your army pals, the booze brigade as you call them. Do not blame yourself when I go. I won’t be able to tell you, I will just have to go and you will have to know in your heart what I am talking about. It wasn’t you John, it was never you. I have to leave to save you, Watson. I’m sorry”

[ultraericthered]

Fixer Upper Concept Pitch: Spider-Man 3

Spider-Man 3 is pretty universally considered to be the weakest entry in the Sam Raimi Spider-Man film trilogy, even by those who enjoy the film. There were a lot of kinks in its script and production that needed a lot of work to make them the best versions of what they could be, and they are visible in the finished product we got in 2007. While many, myself included, would argue that the film's strong points and merits worth appreciating outweigh the weaknesses, doing so doesn't change that those weaknesses are so much notably weaker and detrimental to the overall narrative than those found in the two preceeding films. This is very much a fixer upper movie.

And these are the things that needed some major fixer uppering:

-John Jameson should've been the one to make contact with the asteroid holding the Venom Symbiote, inadvertedly sending it down to Earth back with him, like how it was in the 90's animated series, The Spectacular Spider-Man, and Venom (2018). If you've already introduced and established J. Jonah Jameson's Son, The Astronaut in the second film and Venom is going to be the Big Bad in your third film, then why not use John's occupation for the obvious payoff?

- Aunt May is still an MVP in this trilogy, but her advice here when giving Peter the wedding ring that Uncle Ben had proposed to her with is a little too on the nose and accidentally guilt trippy. I think this part should've been rewritten so that it's not so in-your-face.

- Flint Marko should become the Sandman in the exact same way he does in the movie. I'm sorry, but him having a life-altering experience because people were too lazy to go check the particle accelerator and see if it really was a bird that fell in there is just too hilarious.

- I love Topher Grace's Eddie Brock Jr. prior to him becoming Venom, but when looking at the film objectively, I think he's a pretty pointless character, only existing to become the meat suit Venom uses to fight Spider-Man with, and that role could've been filled by someone else. So either axe him, or include him in a lesser capacity and a minor role where his name is Lance Bannon, as that's who he really was.

- Some more novelization material should be included, like the implication that Ursula Ditkovich secured MJ's new job as a waitress and singer at the jazz club. When MJ signs on for her first day of work, her new employer could tell her that he's familiar with her father Phil Watson, who used to frequently come to the club for drinks after losing his latest job but was recently banned due to repeated disruptive incidents. This would give MJ a deeper perspective on her current life situation and career troubles, as while she's been downtrodden about it all there are still many people, including her abuser, whose lives are in a far worse place, and it also foreshadows the decline Peter takes in the Jazz Club later on, where MJ falls victim to such a "disruptive incident" directly due to him.

- Flint Marko's connection to Uncle Ben's death has to remain since it's what motivates Peter to go after him and gives Venom something to enhance and leech off of, but there wouldn't be any "this was your uncle's REAL killer!" nonsense. From the start it's established that Flint and Dennis Carradine were accomplices, Flint was the one who carjacked Uncle Ben, and Dennis was the one who shot him dead. This leads to Peter believing that Flint held Ben up and kept him from fleeing so that Dennis could murder him. As it would turn out, Ben chose to engage Flint in talk because he could see how scared he was and he was getting through to him by the time Dennis came out with the stolen money, leading to a frustrated Dennis shooting Ben so that Flint could stop being distracted. Flint, however, stayed behind to call for medical help for Ben, leading to his capture by the police.

- Harry's amnesia plot needed to be better handled. He should be gradually starting to remember things rather than having his whole memory return to him in just one moment. After remembering his resentment of Peter and seeing the "attack his heart!" vision of his father, him making MJ break up with Peter ought to have been less a direct threat that he didn't seem able to carry out and more preying on her guilt for kissing him. Afterwards, more attention should've been given to Emo Peter's continued descent into moral degeneracy prior to him taking revenge on both Harry and MJ. Speaking of...

- Ditch the jazz club dance sequence. Playing the piano and doing a shortened dance with Gwen in his arms to show up MJ would've been enough. We didn't need an extended The Mask style dance.

- Now for the big one: Harry goes to the church at the time Peter discards the Venom symbiote, which then latches onto Harry instead, fully restoring his old self and corrupting him further. Now obviously the reason "Harry becomes Venom" wasn't done in the film is because it was not something that was remotely concieved of in any source material or adaptation in 2007, so the filmmakers felt obliged to use Eddie Brock like always. But now that we have the gift of hindsight, everything setting up a "Harry as Venom" turn was right there - Harry's descent into following in his father's footsteps was a running thread throughout the trilogy, the final installment has Venom in it, and Harry's recovery of his memory plus Emo Peter humiliating and scarring him gives him more reason than ever to be consumed by hatred and a desire to kill Peter/Spider-Man. This really feels like the most obvious conclusion that they tragically didn't go with.

- Because Harry's so filled with hatred, his corruption by Venom takes faster compared to Peter's, to the point where Venom is starting to more and more outright possess and "wear" Harry while he's wearing it. The team-up with Sandman would also use the "coerces Flint into helping him by threatening his daughter" version of events used in the novel and video games, and material from the The Black tie-in comic could be used as Harry increasingly loses himself to Venom. Oh, and with Harry as Venom, there's no room for Bernard and his bullshit late revelation to give Harry his change of heart!

- The climax would naturally be changed a bit: Venom's initial hostage would be Gwen since he knows Peter and MJ are broken up. MJ would see this from the taxi cab she's in and would call the police to try to save Gwen, leading to Venom slaughtering the cops and webbing up the cab MJ's in before putting Gwen inside it along with her. When Spider-Man arrives, Venom replicates his father's Sadistic Choice ultimatum, trying to force Peter to choose between Gwen and MJ, with the one he doesn't choose being killed in the suspended taxi cab that's rigged with pumpkin bombs. MJ drops the cinder block on his head to give Peter an opening to start the fight, which goes until Sandman rises up as Venom's defensive wall. While MJ is saving Gwen and navigating the black web for the sake of their survival, Peter's fight with Sandman ends up making noise loud enough to rattle Venom, so as Sandman goes down, Peter uses his web to pull a weak, nearly dead Harry out from Venom. At this point, MJ and Gwen are safe, Flint gives up the fight and Peter makes his peace with him, it seems to be all over....and then Venom consumes the iron bars around the construction site and enlarges itself, coming after Peter in a rage. While Harry gets in front of Peter to make a stand against the Symbiote, who starts draining the remaining life from out of him, MJ catches a fallen pumpkin bomb and tosses it to Peter, who throws it point blank at Venom to completely disintegrate it. Harry's death scene and funeral proceeds to play out as it did. - The ending would be the same save for one thing - after Peter and MJ embrace, it fades into a final shot of the heart shaped web from earlier in the film. We see Spider-Man swing overhead, his back turned to the audience to signify that this is where this story ends.

Now keep in mind, this is all retrospective ideas for what this movie could have been. Would I actually truly want to heavily change the movie it ended up as? Absolutely not, as it already got its own fixed up edition in the form of The Editor's Cut. If you've not seen this cut, please do! Watching that, along with the novelization, tie-in comics, and tie-in video games. go a long way towards giving you a whole new appreciation for this under-appreciated film (which thankfully recieves more love nowadays. Thanks, Bully Maguire!) and what Raimi and co. were able to accomplish under their circumstances.

[whcdunit]

“i’d like to be upfront with you, doctor, because i do believe that honesty is the best policy.” sherlock unwound his scarf from around his neck and dropped it onto the coffee table in front of him. the room was warmer than he’d expected it to be— likely to lower his blood pressure and calm him. “we don’t need to be here.” he leaned back and clasped his hands together. “but the man sitting next to me wouldn’t shut up until i agreed to attend a session. for what, i’m sure you’re wondering and i can tell you—” sherlock inhaled deeply, “watson is apparently still angry with me over something that happened more two years ago now— i did explain my rationale and it was very rational— but he just keeps bringing up. i think it’s a pride issue— being wrong, you know. some people just can’t stand it.” 

@slecths​

[dathen]

“You’ll know all about it presently. Jump up here. All right, John; we shall not need you. Here’s half a crown. Look out for me to-morrow, about eleven.”

So THAT’S why Watson has a different first name now! Holmes’ coachman accomplice stole his original!

[zealouscanonindeer]

Common Courtesy

Dr John Watson:

The Victoria station buzzed, the great cesspool of people flittering and hovering about like bees, their muffled goodbyes, tears, exclamations of joy all amalgamating into one incessant white noise to fill your ears until one threw his hat off in a mixture of irk and stimulating energy.

We waited by the stagnant train for the doors to open and reveal our compartment, which was to be our residing place for the next few hours. The train hooted and the steam rose in a majestic fashion, engulfing all and leaving them slightly bleary eyed. The doors were opened and Holmes and I made our way to our coach. Here we sat down opposite each other, Holmes pulled out a map of Denver and a pencil and began his detailed marking, outline of his pursuit and plan of attack. In time I would come to know it too.

"Watson, the primary task before us is to ensure Emily's safety. Once we have achieved that i suppose the rest shall follow. However, there is one thing I must ask of you, I warn you it is accompanied by a certain amount of danger... "

"You know better than anyone that I am willing share all that comes your way on these adventure. "

"A better accomplice a man never had.. "

"You flatter me, Holmes."

"I owe and Emily does too.. to your sense of humility in correcting my occasional pertinent ways."

"Now, what is this thing you want of me? "

"Ah. Yes. It is, you see my ardent request that you escort Emily back to Cartwright estate as soon as she is to be found. "

I must admit I was afraid. I was fairly certain that it would be a humongous task to get her to agree. A fine example of pushing her against her will, had on numerous occasions been put forth and it was enough to worry me for my own sake.

"You know better than anyone that she is not one to comply to such things. And she most certainly will heed to nothing against her own wills. "

"Indeed Watson. But it keeps things interesting, does it not? " Holmes smirked.

I suppose they both shared equal love for the sport,a constant defiance yet underlined by care. A passion quite foreign to me before my long acquaintance with Sherlock Holmes. The tingling anticipation in your bones, the fervid wait and dissolving mysteries appeal to even the most dull minds.

I had sadly been troubled by my war wound the past few months but the warm weather coupled with a new adventure had livened my spirits greatly. As the train rolled through the vast grassy countryside of London, I only hoped we were in time.

******

Denver, a quaint little port in the outskirts of North of England stood stark in contrast to the secrets it housed.

Holmes pulled me out of my reverie, absorbing the view himself in a quick glance before he transformed into Holmes the sleuthhound, on the scent of his targets and would relentlessly pursue his chase to a satisfactory end.

We walked about town for a few hours on the pretext on obtaining lodgings as per our liking and disqualifying any place having served it's purpose of rendering us with data. Making our way out of one such building, Holmes was quick to divert my attention.

"Watson, look the window frames! "

I turned curtly to view a massive church across the bank, on the other side of the water its looming windows hardly unnoticeable. We quickly hired a boat, our ferryman slightly amazed by our rush but in the end pleased as we preferred to leave our change in his competent hands.

Holmes made quick work of the lock, allowing us into the deserted building. In the center stood a singular chair, a rope grappled and savagely cut through. The room smelt burned and the darkened walls conveyed the similar expression.

"Watson, keep your revolver on hand." Holmes instructed. With his magnifying glass, he studied the ends of the rope. Subsequently , he made his way around the room, lying flat on his stomach inspecting every inch of the floor.

"The rope was used to bind someone to that chair, the ends are frayed excessively, the fibers stabbed considerably and repeatedly by a thin tool and shaky hand, indicative of a hurried escape. In all probability the weapon in question seems to be a hatpin. The fire I surmise, was the acute threat. "

"Good heavens! She has escaped then."

Holmes drew in a sharp breath and closing his eyes, exhaled, mildy shuddering.

" Where do you suppose they are now? "

"The far end of the water, getting into the vessel named, I believe The Regent."

"How could you possibly deduce that?"

"The floor is indented with scratches produced by dragging of wheels, trolleys carring heavy weights for the wheels have sunk into the wood ever so slightly at certain standpoints. The rest you see is common inference.The only vehicle carrying such heavy goods is a ship and the only ship leaving Denver today is the singular Regent. Denver hauls it's main vessels at the central port, a ship of such size could dock only there.

"It's impossibly commonplace! "

"Omne ignotum pro magnifico."

Holmes shrugged with mild asperity before we made our way into the sleepy streets of Denver. We walked through a small alley which would save us some time and allow us to reach our destination faster. A common street urchin with a wierd looking cap over her head collided with Holmes, in my view almost deliberately.

"Pardon me." Holmes quickly apologized, continuing ahead. To my utter surprise, the urchin slid her hand into his, pulling him to a stop.

"You follow me across the country and yet you have forsaken the common courtesy to greet me. I truly have given up hope of ever understanding you." She smiled.

[teawaffles]

The Adventures of John: Chapter 4, Part 2

TW // Mention of abuse

Also, a note for language.

Without even an opportunity for Laura to resist, Sherlock pulled his hand out ��� and revealed a gorgeous necklace. It wasn’t as if John could remember that necklace itself, but from its elegant sparkle, he judged that it’d been one of the items from their flat.

The despair on Laura’s face only deepened. Beside her, the detective spoke.

“This was stolen from my flat. Since the jewellery was in such a mess, you probably thought it wouldn’t look amiss if just one piece went missing — but that was naive of you,” he said. “Because I have a full grasp of everything that was put there.”

When Laura arrived at their flat, Sherlock had made a show of being indifferent to her request, while making sure that she had taken one of the stolen goods.

To have fully comprehended that chaos — John marvelled at the strength of Sherlock’s memory. During the conversation in the flat, he had persisted in looking out the window, away from Laura: that must’ve been to create a deliberate opening, and test if the girl would help herself to the pile.

Laura had stolen a piece of jewellery from their apartment. Moreover, she’d made up the request to find Dolly. Inevitably, from the two points above, it followed that her goal from the start had been to steal the jewellery. Hence, it formed definite proof that she was one of the thieves’ accomplices.

Confronted by that irreversible reality, Laura was stunned. As for the man, his eyes went bloodshot from anger.

“Y-You’ve gotta be kidding me, you good-for-nothing……. I told you to do it without exposing us—”

Hearing that, Sherlock piped up in a cool voice.

“Shall I take that as a confession? Though, there is still the argument that this kid Laura here is just another one of you vagrants, and you guys have nothing to do with the ring of thieves.”

The man spat on the ground.

“Hmph, I’ve no interest flogging that argument anymore. ——Let’s settle this the fast way.”

Saying that, he drew a small revolver from his pocket, and levelled it at Sherlock. Following suit, a few men among the group also whipped out knives and guns. The remaining crowd cried out softly in fear.

“If we dispatch the both of you right here, the truth’ll remain buried, eh?”

At that unsettling line, his armed accomplices also broke into twisted smiles.

But despite being held at gunpoint, Sherlock seemed particularly unmoved. He observed their actions, and narrated his own view.

“From the looks of it, you lot are the ringleaders, while the rest seem to have been threatened into compliance.”

“Yeah: with just a little bit of a beating, they’ll do anything we ask,” the man smirked.

But Sherlock was calm as he replied.

“From that, I gather not all of you are friends. And seeing how you resort to violence to settle things right away: you’re probably a hoodlum accustomed to crime, aren’t ya?”

“Hoodlum? You’re not wrong, but call us a group of clever thieves if you can. After all, I’ve skilfully manipulated these scum and carried out some brilliant thefts.”

Drunk on his own accomplishments, the man threw a glance at Laura. She hadn’t budged from where she stood; protecting her head, she cowered on the ground in sheer terror. From that, one could easily imagine what maltreatment she and the others had suffered at the hands of these thugs.

His heart filled with rage, John glared at the man.

“That means you forced them to commit crimes, didn’t you?”

“Call it making effective use of them, Doctor Watson,” he drawled. “These people all live on a pittance of a daily income. No one would care if they’re gone. I’ve given them a rather fine job until now, but this time, she just had to screw up. ——As I thought, brats are useless after all!”

“……I-I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

He shouted at Laura, and she repeated that apology over and over as she sobbed.

“You……”

“John, you’re right to be angry, but please calm down.”

At the unforgivable sight before him, the detective’s assistant had balled his hands into fists, but Sherlock persuaded him to keep his cool.

“Ah…… Sorry to get back to the topic, but let me give you some clarity on this case.”

“Huh?”

As before, Sherlock’s demeanour lacked any sort of tension, and his opponent frowned. But the detective paid no heed to that as he continued.

“To sum up the story thus far: the bunch of louts brandishing their weapons here are the ringleaders behind the thefts, and the other vagrants and street merchants were forcibly…… ‘used’, if I were to borrow your words?”

“Yeah, that’s right. You could say that they’re all expendables to be exploited as I please. To have so skilfully manipulated them — I bet my abilities rival those of that rumoured ‘Lord of Crime’ or something.”

“……Well.”

At that name, Sherlock’s eye twitched. But he showed no further reaction than that as he replied.

“In other words, to you guys, their names and faces aren’t even worth remembering?”

“That’s an odd way to put it, but exactly. They’re all disposable — do you really think I can remember all of them? ……That said, how long are you gonna keep prattling on like that? I don’t know if you’re just trying to buy time, but it’s time for you to die.”

Running out of patience, the man broke off their conversation, and moved to pull the trigger: fully intending to shoot the detective and his assistant.

However, Sherlock’s smile remained bold as ever.

“——That’s it then. I’ve gotten your word.”

That instant, John couldn’t believe his eyes.

Among the crowd of vagrants, the ones who were shrouded in hoods — separate from the ringleaders — were now aiming guns at the criminals.

“……Huh?”

“——Don’t move.”

One of the mysterious figures commanded sternly, keeping his gun trained on the lead criminal. Stunned by this sudden development, the man complied; and with his other hand, the figure slowly drew back his hood.

“……Inspector Lestrade?”

Out of sheer astonishment, John murmured the person's name.

The man in the hood, was Inspector Lestrade of Scotland Yard. Facing the lead criminal, he spoke in a determined voice.

“From the conversation earlier, it’s clear that you have threatened the poor and coerced them into crime. I’ll hear the details at the station. Don’t even think about resisting.”

Then, the other figures removed their hoods and revealed their faces. One after the other, they confiscated the weapons from the stunned hoodlums. Though they weren’t wearing uniforms, from their practised actions, it was clear that they were police officers.

“W-What the devil is going on……?”

Tonight had been a night of many surprises for this detective. John was yet unable to wrap his head around the situation, and once again, he asked himself a question he’d thought about countless times today.

“Everything’s exactly as you’ve witnessed, John. When I identified this place, I contacted Lestrade at the same time, then got the officers to disguise themselves as tramps and hide among the crowd.”

“But why?”

“If I’d just called in the Yard as usual, we wouldn’t have been able to identify the ringleaders among this large a crowd.”

Sherlock stated that conclusion in brief, then began to explain.

“As I thought about the thieves’ actions, I judged that there was probably a mastermind separate from the ones committing the actual crimes, who was controlling them from behind the scenes. Hence, there was a need to identify this mastermind; but even if the Yard were to round up the entire group of vagrants, like what that ruffian told me earlier, they could just say that they had no relation to the ring of thieves — and that would be the end of it. Moreover, it still wasn’t clear who the ringleaders were, and the ring members who were being threatened would’ve likely been warned not to blab. So, in order to smoke out the ringleaders and elicit a confession, I added a bit of an act.”

Then, the detective looked at Lestrade, and the corners of his mouth twitched upward.

“——Well, about the disguises: I’d thought about where the police squad could hide themselves, and decided it would be better for them to mingle with the crowd, so they wouldn’t have to sneak about all weirdly.”

“W-Wha— What a stupid……”

Upon hearing the truth, the man’s earlier triumphant attitude had devolved into a disgraceful, incredulous one. This time, Sherlock laughed out loud.

“Sure, you can make people follow you, but you’ll also have to keep tabs on them properly. In the first place, when this location was discovered, didn’t it occur to you that I would call in the Yard? You can pretend to be a mastermind, but with your lack of foresight, even the Lord of Crime would laugh.”

“S……Shite.”

“Oi, watch what you say from here on. It’ll be used as evidence against you in court.”

Lestrade warned the man as he clapped him in irons; accepting his defeat, he hung his head bitterly. For a villain who’d exploited people in poverty, and boasted of rivalling the Lord of Crime: it was a downright dreadful ending.

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

“I’ll always be in your debt, Holmes. And the same goes for you, Dr Watson.”

As he watched the arrested criminals being taken away, Lestrade thanked the detective duo.

However, in contrast to the inspector’s earnest attitude, Sherlock put a hand over his mouth as he tried to suppress his laughter.

“Lestrade. Sorry for saying this when you’re being so serious, but…… you looked surprisingly good as a tramp.”

“H-Hey! That’s rude, Sherlock!”

“By Jove, Sherlock……”

John chided the detective, and Lestrade let out an astonished sigh.

“……Anyway, I’m grateful for your help in resolving this case.”

“Yeah, let me know when you have another interesting mystery next time.”

After that simple exchange, the inspector left to join the other police officers.

Then, Laura — the central figure from today — and an old woman from among the vagrants walked over to them.

“——U-Um, Dr Watson.”

The girl stood right before John. She bit her lip, and sank into a deep bow.

“I’m so sorry for tricking you!”

Laura blurted that out in a loud voice. Then, the old woman also bowed solemnly.

Met with their sincere apologies, John spoke up in a kind voice.

“It’s alright. You had no choice — all of you were being threatened.”

“B-But…… I……”

“Don’t worry about it. In any case, won’t it be tough for you all from here on?”

With a start, Laura realised what he meant, and dropped her gaze. Though they had been coerced into thievery, it was still a fact that they had broken the law. Hence, in order to furnish the details to the Yard, all of them would be taken in for questioning.

The atmosphere turned slightly gloomy, and Sherlock piped up.

“You don’t have to be so serious about it, y’know. Seeing as all of you had been forced into those crimes, the Yard’ll treat you more leniently.”

“Y-You’re right.”

John knew that Sherlock was deliberately being optimistic, in an effort not to worry them both. Hence, though it was a little awkward, John agreed with him.

Perhaps the matter wasn’t as simple as Sherlock had described, but the events from now on would be out of their hands entirely. Hoping that Lestrade would speak well in their defence, John changed the topic somewhat forcibly.

“……By the way, is this lady a relative of yours?”

Hearing that, Laura brightened up, and introduced the old woman.

“Yes, she’s my grandmother; we’ve been making a living together selling food.”

“Truly, please accept my sincere apologies for what happened.”

Hearing the old woman’s husky voice, John finally understood the awkward exchange he had witnessed between them at the park. Seeing as they were family, it was only natural for Laura to be more relaxed around her; moreover, the old woman’s faltering tone had surely been due to her guilt at deceiving him.

John nodded in understanding. Then, Laura took out a small pouch.

“That and this…… Here’s the full amount we’ve taken from you, Dr Watson. Please accept it.”

“Ah, I see. I’d forgotten all about the money. Thank you.”

John was about to reach for the pouch, when all of a sudden, a thought struck him — and he stopped.

“……Um, is something the matter?”

Seeing him freeze up, Laura tilted her head. Then, John withdrew his hand, and instead held up the bag full of items he’d bought from the street merchants.

“‘Taken’? What’re you saying? I bought these of my own accord. I can’t see any issues with them, so I’ve no intention of getting a refund.”

“……Eh?”

“Isn’t that right? I negotiated properly with the merchants in the parks, and bought these items as a customer. There was no trickery at all.”

John asserted that proudly, and beside him, he heard Sherlock chuckle.

Of course, what John said was by no means a show of bravado that he hadn’t been tricked. Laura had been moved by his kindness throughout the day; in an instant, she sensed the emotions imbued in his words. But even so, she knitted her brows, looking troubled.

“Still, I really should return this to you.”

She then offered him the pouch again, but John gently pushed it away.

“Laura, in all honesty, the walnuts your grandmother sold me were delicious. For products that good, it’s only right that I pay a fair price for them.”

His smile was full of warmth as he continued.

“If I happen to see your stall again, I’ll be sure to buy from you.”

“Dr Watson……”

This time, Laura did not press the matter.

She held the pouch as if it were a treasure, and her face brimmed with smiles.

“——Alright. When we see each other again, I’ll be sure to prepare lots of walnuts for you.”

“Yeah, I’m looking forward to that.”

Then, John bade goodbye to Laura and her grandmother; and with his “loot” in hand, he left the scene with Sherlock.

[disneyat34]

The Great Mouse Detective at 34

A review by Adam D. Jaspering

When it comes to the animated canon, it seems sometimes that Disney is attempting to make an exhaustive list of adaptations. That the studio is creating their own version of every beloved character in fiction. When it came time to adapt Sherlock Holmes, they had a choice. Disney could introduce children to a character renowned for stories featuring violent crime and intrigue. Or they could tell a watered-down story that impugns his genius. Or Disney could get clever and dance around the problem.

The Great Mouse Detective is not a direct adaptation of Sherlock Holmes. It is instead an adaptation of a series of children’s novels written by Eve Titus. The stories created a parallel society of mice, operating in tandem with the human population. The main character, Basil, is similar to Sherlock Holmes in attitude and behavior. But he is not Sherlock Holmes by very nature that Sherlock Holmes also exists in Basil’s world.

The characters in Titus’s stories are similar to Arthur Conan Doyle’s characters. Their setting, mannerisms, and relations are near identical, just reframed to accommodate mice. They exist within the same universe as the actual Sherlock Holmes, living parallel but independent lives. Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson have mouse expies. Professor Moriarty has a rodent doppelganger. Even Queen Victoria has a vermin double living within the walls of Buckingham Palace.

The mice are aware of their human counterparts; are the humans aware of the mice? Do the humans and mice deliberately live in parallel, or is it a series of extreme coincidences? If it’s the former, what happens if one half of the pair relocates to a new city? Or dies? Does their accomplice soldier forth without them? If there’s a Queen Victoria mouse, is there a mouse Hanover lineage? Does this phenomenon spread across the world?  Do mice choose only to emulate the notorious and famed? Or does everyone in London have a mouse doppelganger?

The point I’m so deliriously overanalyzing is that Basil is not Sherlock Holmes. He is a distinct individual who is alarmingly akin to Sherlock Holmes in all regards. Both have an analytical mindset. Both can be cold and dispassionate towards others. Both have a sartorial preference for tweed deerstalkers. Both play the violin. Although, for the sake of the young audience, no evidence exists of Basil sharing his human partner’s predilection for morphine and cocaine.

Both Holmes and Basil are self-reliant, methodical, and obsessive. Both appreciate organized chaos in their living space. Both avoid social interaction. Both treat their home as a live-in forensics lab. Both are masters of disguise, disappearing into a role. Both have a flair for theatrics and revel when they astound onlookers. Basil may technically be an character individually independent of Holmes. But for all intents and purposes, one should think of Basil as Holmes.

The idea of Disney adapting a series of books featuring mice solving crimes is odd. It would be the second time they did so. Less than ten years earlier, they made The Rescuers. Why would the company revisit a concept so soon, but not the characters?

It wasn’t unintentional, but not deliberate either. When the rights to Basil of Baker Street were acquired, production was delayed. The animators realized the similarities to The Rescuers, and didn’t want the film to seem inferential. However, the troubled production of The Black Cauldron changed everything. Animators dissatisfied with The Black Cauldron were eager to begin working on anything else, even if it did seem derivative. It would be the first time since the 1950s Disney Animation worked on two films simultaneously.

The big problem is, Sherlock Holmes is a household name. Basil of Baker Street is far more esoteric. Disney Studios head John Katzenberg was astutely aware of this. He knew audiences would be alienated and confused by a strange name on a familiar character.

Katzenberg rationalized it. If the character looked like Sherlock Holmes, acted like Sherlock Holmes, and solved mysteries like Sherlock Holmes, the audience would assume he was Sherlock Holmes. There’s no point dispelling the illusion until after they’ve bought their tickets.

Katzenberg did what he did best: make an executive decision that upset the rest of the staff. He unilaterally renamed Basil of Baker Street to the much more ambiguous The Great Mouse Detective. One of the most blatantly literal, uninspired titles in film history.

The title tells you the main character is a mouse. That mouse is a detective. And that mouse detective is great at being a mouse detective. It doesn’t mention Basil, it doesn’t mention Holmes. Instead, it mentions how much Disney was willing to lie through omission.

The mystery at the center of the film involves the kidnapping of a local toymaker. Mr Flaversham is abducted late at night in a violent struggle. His daughter, witness to the crime, seeks Basil for help. Much more than a simple missing person case, Basil uncovers a grand conspiracy to usurp the British throne.

As mentioned, Basil is the stand-in for Sherlock Holmes. He has all the traits, positive and negative. This includes his introverted indifference towards others, especially children. It’s not exactly a great attribute for the main character of a children’s cartoon.

Disney compensates by making Basil a vibrant, energetic individual. He moves very fast, talks very fast, and thinks very fast. He has a fervent energy that makes him fun to watch, even if he is unlikable and arrogant. He’s also subjected to a good bit of slapstick humor, which takes his arrogance down a peg.

He also warms up to his colleagues as the film progresses. Dawson (the stand-in for Dr Watson) and Olivia, the audience surrogate. While this can be read as a character arc for Basil, learning to love and appreciate those around you, there’s not really enough evidence. There’s no proof he actually warms to others, just that he’s familiar enough to hide his scorn. Basil will likely never see Olivia again, and there’s no indication he’s changed for the better.

Even in Doyle’s stories, Sherlock Holmes was cold and introverted to near everyone. Watson was Holmes’s only true friend; everyone else was either an associate or a consult. Trying to insert a lesson about friendship in The Great Mouse Detective is like trying to instill lessons of maturity in Peter Pan. It’s the wrong moral from the wrong character.

Dr Dawson is the grounded, rational everyman who serves as Basil’s assistant. Through obligation, he accompanies Basil through his investigations. Just as his human equivalent, Dawson exists to approach things literally and slowly. He asks the right questions at the right times, forcing Basil to verbalize his thought process for the audience.

In the film, Dawson acts as a straight man to Basil’s eccentricity. He is dignified, mannered, and easily intimidated. Every time he stumbles or hesitates, Basil looks more heroic by comparison. Every time Dawson asks for clarification, Basil sounds smarter by comparison.

In every Sherlock Holmes adaptation, it’s a struggle to make the Watson character useful. Otherwise, he’s just another tool for Holmes to use, like his magnifying glass. In the case of The Great Mouse Detective, Dawson is there to keep Basil grounded and humble. Whenever things don’t go absolutely right, Basil falls into a funk of defeated depression.

Dawson is there to keep his spirits high. It doesn’t matter that Basil isn’t perfect. He’s still doing something good, and more important, he’s the only one capable of doing what he does. Perfection isn’t the goal. Tenacity, confidence, and perseverance are the goals.

The film’s villain is Ratigan, our film’s stand-in for Professor Moriarty. Equally intelligent, equally cunning, and equally skilled as Basil. But irredeemably malicious, sadistic, and corrupt.

Ratigan is voiced by film legend Vincent Price. Price lends a level of foppishness and conceit, making Ratigan’s arrogance a stark contrast to Basil’s. Basil is only arrogant in the moment, when he either has or is about to demonstrate his genius. Ratigan insists his greatness be his defining character trait at all times. He even makes his henchmen sing about it.

The cockiness paints Ratigan not only as mentally unstable, but unlikeable. The prissy mannerisms and narcissistic tendencies make him hugely camp. A strange, unfamiliar, and surprisingly engaging villain. Basil may be energetic and peppy, but Ratigan is outright theatrical and unapologetically flamboyant.

Making Ratigan a rat when nearly every other character is a mouse is a strange choice. Even in the original book, he was a mouse. Why make him a rat now?

Both rats and mice are vermin and nuisances, but Disney like mice. There are dozens of animated Disney mice. Rats are vile and scorn-worthy. Mice can be heroes, but a rat is immediately recognized as a villain. Rats wouldn’t receive a redemption until 2007. Even then, it was from Pixar, not Disney.

Ratigan goes to great lengths to hide, compensate for, or deny his species. In his villain song, he maliciously exterminates a henchman who dares refer to him as a rat. It adds to his egotism. Even as a rat, he finds mice classy, debonair, and sophisticated. Rats are disgusting.

Pride is a central fixture to Ratigan as a character. He does everything he can to elevate himself out of his self-loathing status. It means dressing in the finest clothing. It means commanding full devotion from his minions. It means intimidating all of Britain. Anything, as long as no one sees him as a rat.

Considering this, one must wonder why, if Ratigan hates being a rat so much, he still uses the name “Ratigan.” Those last two syllables are doing an awful lot of work.

Being a Sherlock Holmes story, the film centers around a mystery. Specifically, the abduction of Mr Flaversham and the purpose behind it. In most Sherlock Holmes stories, Holmes is a consulting detective. London police contact him when a crime cannot be solved through conventional means. Holmes notices clues, and follows trails trying to make sense of it all. There are dead ends, red herrings, and a rather inside-out narrative. The purpose of everything is not fully revealed until the last chapter.

The Great Mouse Detective is a movie for kids. A complicated narrative is a death knell. As such, the mystery component isn’t very mysterious at all. In fact, it’s rather straightforward. Basil knows immediately who kidnapped Flaversham. He follows the kidnapper. A clue sends him to the docks. From there, he follows the kidnapper again, finding Ratigan’s lair. He escapes a death trap and runs immediately to Buckingham Palace, as that’s exactly where Ratigan said he was going. There’s very little mystery in this mystery film. It’s a big game of follow the leader.

With no examinations necessary, set pieces go on for interminably long stretches. Basil and Dawson simply waste time until the scene ends and the singular clue is delivered to them. They don’t follow evidence and form theories. They amble around, exploring their environments. The animators worked hard designing these environments, they are going to be used.

Basil and Dawson go undercover at a seedy oceanfront tavern? We get an entire vaudeville burlesque number. Basil and Dawson investigate a toy store? We don’t leave until there’s a fight scene with all the wind-up novelties. Basil and Dawson are caught in Ratigan’s trap? Ratigan gives his lengthy villain monologue, then plays a record of his taunting villain song, then activates his Rube Goldberg villain deathtrap. Only then can the heroes escape.

In another nod to its young audience, Basil’s methods are pared down considerably. Holmes didn’t formulate hypotheses or look for clues (that was the police’s job). If the police couldn’t solve the crime, there was a reason. Instead, Holmes would make a series of stray observations concerning anomalies and irrelevancies. Eventually, these unimportant facts would pile upon each other. With enough analysis, the unrelated details would reveal the important facts the police missed.

Basil’s methodology is missing the scrupulous examination. He follows a trail of conveniently-laid breadcrumbs. Anybody could step into the role. To display Basil as an unmitigated genius, he uses some unnecessarily complicated methods. He fires a revolver at his throw pillows to produce a bullet. He incinerates paper and runs it through a distillery to determine that it had salt on it. He does vector calculus in his head just to determine when a ball rolling down a chute will reach the bottom.

Eventually, it’s revealed Ratigan abducted Flaversham to create a clockwork automaton. Being the best toymaker in London, he is the closest thing 1897 has to a robotics expert. Ratigan plans on using the robot to impersonate the Queen of England (the mouse version). By replacing Queen Victoria with a wind-up automaton, Ratigan can enact any number of edicts directly benefiting him.

Being the 1890s, the mechanics are quite primitive. Gears and shafts are loud and clanking. Edges are square. The voicebox is tinny. It’s a deliberate stylish choice, but also highlights how incredibly nonsensical Ratigan’s plan is. It may be the most advanced piece of technology ever seen, but it only passively looks convincing. It especially doesn’t resemble the most famous and powerful woman on Earth.

Then again, it does fool an audience of suspicious yet gullible onlookers. Maybe he underestimated England’s gullibility. One wonders if Ratigan could have pulled off his master plan without a  robot, but instead a paper bag mask.

Clockwork comes into play again at the film’s climax. Basil and Ratigan square off inside the mechanisms of Big Ben. The intricate clockwork backgrounds are early computer-generated animation. They are used magnificently and age surprisingly well. The hand-drawn Basil and Ratigan don’t look out of place at all. They integrate perfectly into the environment. The gears make an intensely captivating action scene. It’s a fight to the death in an unforgiving, dangerous locale.

Basil, being a genius, acclimates to his environment quickly. He avoids the deathtraps at every turn, even using them to his advantage. Ratigan, blinded by his rage, resorts to more primitive solutions. All his preening and fussiness melts away. His suit becomes tattered, he runs on all fours, and dispatches with all carefully-curated humanity. He is now what he has always hated: a dirty, disgusting rat.

Here the difference between hero and villain is on display. When everything goes wrong for Ratigan, he falls apart. He loses his dignity and refinement. He panics, becomes a slave to emotion, and enables his own downfall. When everything goes wrong for Basil, he reassesses the situation, finds a new method, uses the resources at hand, and moves forward. He doesn’t panic, he doesn’t give up, and always finds a solution. Just as Dawson encouraged him earlier. It’s a very well-placed and unforced planting and payoff of plot points.

The Great Mouse Detective is a unique spectacle. It’s a mystery without a mystery, and a character piece masquerading its main character. Basil isn’t Sherlock Holmes, but is painted as such. The filmmakers insist he’s a genius, but put him in outlandish situations where luck serves him better than intellect. The criminal plot is not so much unraveled as stumbled upon. It’s not a great detective story, but it’s a well-told story (apart from a few pacing problems). It’s a nice introductory piece to the mystery genre for young audiences.

While the film fails as genre fiction, it is salvaged by interesting characters, a great sense of humor, and a few stunning pieces of animation. It’s not the most exciting adventure, or the most mind-bending crime drama, but it’s a kid’s movie. It is deliberately accessible for a young audience. One would go so far as to call it elementary.

Fantasia Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Cinderella Alice in Wonderland Sleeping Beauty The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh Pinocchio The Jungle Book Robin Hood The Sword in the Stone Bambi The Great Mouse Detective 101 Dalmatians The Three Caballeros Lady and the Tramp The Fox and the Hound Peter Pan Dumbo The Black Cauldron Melody Time The Rescuers Saludos Amigos The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad The Aristocats Fun and Fancy Free Make Mine Music

[blogstandbygo]

Fic Review - Fight or Flight by saintscully

Title: Fight or Flight

Author: saintscully

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25032004/chapters/60620197

# of words: 10,958, 10 chapters

Rating:  Mature

Date published: 2020-07-03 (after S4)

Key Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes, Rosamund Mary "Rosie" Watson, Mary Morstan, Mrs. Hudson (Sherlock Holmes), Greg Lestrade, Molly Hooper, Mycroft Holmes, Ajay (Sherlock), Stella Hopkins, Original Male Character(s)

Themes/Tags:  Unresolved Romantic Tension, Mutual Pining, Episode: s04e01 The Six Thatchers, Fix-It of Sorts, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Self-Doubt, Episode: s04e02 The Lying Detective, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Jealous John

Review:

This fic digs some deep layers indeed beneath the surface of The Six Thatchers and The Lying Detective, focusing in particular on the period when Mary has taken off. Mary’s flight becomes a metaphor for the common reactors to stress – fight or flight. Mary’s escape is literal ‘flight’, while John and Sherlock embark on a stressful push/pull of repressed emotion (‘fight’) as relates to their relationship. It’s pretty clear that they both realize that there is something more than friendship between them but both lack the ability to actually sit down and talk about it. It’s a fascinating exploration of a dance of sorts, of two men trying to figure out how to be better for each other. There’s a sequel that I’m looking forward to getting into next.

The words that took my breath away:

The problem is that, not unlike during the period after Mary shot him, Sherlock seems to be the one most determined to unite her with John. In being stubbornly supportive of the woman who put a bullet through his heart, Sherlock is Mary’s accomplice in breaking John's.

If you like this, try:

Points, by lifeonmars

(Never) Turn Your Back on the Sea, by DiscordantWords

Reblog to share the fic love! Let me know if you want to be tagged, or untagged for future reviews.

Send me your recs! Reccing yourself is welcome!

@therealsaintscully

@missdaviswrites

@fearlessdiva930

@amindamazed

@hubblegleeflower

@pippn-frodo

@quantum-sparrow

@weneedtotalkaboutsherlock

@disaronnus

@addictedstilltheaddict

@prettyrealisticjohnlockfanart

@daringlydomestic

@totallysilvergirl

@pipmer

@otter-von-bismarck

@shirleycarlton

@onwallsjcfwrites

@shamelessmash

[gachagamewishlist]

John Watson Fan Servant My Room Lines

Summoned: “Dr. John H. Watson at your service! Or rather, should I have introduced myself as Caster John Watson instead?”

Dialogue 1: “Did you remember to eat and drink? Nourishment is important for the body you know?”

Dialogue 2: “Remember to rest your body, come let’s take a nap before our next battle”

Dialogue 3: “Ah perfect timing, come here and let me inspect you for any injuries”

Bond 1: “Tell me, do you need any assistance?”

Bond 2: “Remember to mind your health, come to me if you feel any pain”

Bond 3:  “Holmes can be rather difficult to work with but let us try our best together hm?”

Bond 4:  “Rely on me, I’ll support you through any troubles you’ll face. We’re friends after all”

Bond 5: “Trust me, you’ll have the most extraordinary adventures and become a splendid hero, though I hope that you’ll let me stay by your side through it all”

If you have Sherlock: “Tell me Holmes, what adventure are we going on now?”

If you have a child servant: “Pain pain go away~, now here, take a lollipop”

If you have Moriarty: “You! How dare you come here! Master stay away from him okay? He’ll be a bad influence on you”

If you have Moran: “Ready to nabbed by Holmes again Moran?”

Sherlock to Watson: “Ah Watson, come here and tell me your thoughts on this”

Moriarty about Watson: “It’s you! Master hand me a tomato or something, I’ll be sure to hit him properly this time”

Moran about Watson: “That detective’s accomplice huh? I heard you were in the army as well, so tell me doctor, shall we test our guns then?”

Event: “Seems like we’ll be going on an interesting adventure, let’s go Master”

Holy Grail: “I’ve lived a satisfying life so I don’t need a thing like that. Having adventures with you is good enough for me”

Likes: “Things I like? It’s a bit childish of me I suppose but I simply cannot extinguish my thirst for adventure”

Dislikes: “Evil, the worse kind of men are smart but who use their brain for the evil of humanity”

Birthday: “Do you have any requests? I’ll do my best to grant any wish you have today”

[darkacademicx]

A List of Show Recs, While You’re Stuck at Home

This is a huge and continuously updating list.  The first 2 categories are ‘definitely DA’ and ‘Probably DA’, but beyond that all of the shows are sorted by category.  Enjoy!

Definitely DA:

The Living and the Dead - The plot revolves around Nathan Appleby and his wife, Charlotte Appleby whose farm is believed to be at the centre of numerous supernatural occurrences. Set in Victorian times and has ghosts and an excellent aesthetic.  Available on Amazon Prime. 5/5

A Series of Unfortunate Events - This series follows the tragic tale of three orphans -- Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire -- who are investigating their parents' mysterious death. The siblings are saddled with an evil guardian named Count Olaf , who will do whatever it takes to get his hands on the Baudelaires' inheritance. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny must outsmart Olaf at every turn, foiling devious plans and disguises. The series is based on the series of books by Lemony Snicket.  Available on Netflix. 

The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina - A dark coming-of-age story that traffics in horror and the occult. In the reimagined origin story, Sabrina Spellman wrestles to reconcile her dual nature -- half-witch, half-mortal -- while standing against the evil forces that threaten her, her family -- including aunts Hilda and Zelda -- and the daylight world humans inhabit.  Available on Netflix. 5/5

Downton Abbey - This historical drama follows the lives of the Crawley family and their servants in the family's Edwardian country house. The programme begins with the 1912 sinking of the Titanic, which leaves Downton Abbey's future in jeopardy, as Lord Grantham's presumptive heir -- his cousin James -- and his son, Patrick, die aboard the ship, leaving him without a male offspring to take over the throne upon his death. As a result, Lord Grantham must search for a new heir. As the programme progresses through the decade, other historical events happen leading up to Lord Grantham declaring in 1914 that Britain is at war with Germany, marking the beginning of World War I, which becomes a major plot on the programme.  Available on Amazon Prime.

Gran Hotel - Set in Spain in the early 20th century, Julio arrives at a luxury hotel to meet his sister, head chambermaid Cristina only to discover she has disappeared. Julio makes it his mission to find her and infiltrates the hotel under the guise of a footman.  This show is in Spanish but available with English Subtitles. 5/5

Penny Dreadful - An exploration of the origin stories of classical literature characters in this psychological thriller that takes place in the dark corners of Victorian London. Sir Malcolm is an explorer who has lost his daughter to the city's creatures, and he will do whatever is needed to get her back and to right past wrongs. His accomplice, seductive clairvoyant Vanessa Ives, recruits charming American Ethan Chandler to help locate Sir Malcolm's daughter and slay some monsters. Available on Netflix and Hulu. 

The Umbrella Academy - On one day in 1989, 43 infants are inexplicably born to random, unconnected women who showed no signs of pregnancy the day before. Seven are adopted by billionaire industrialist Sir Reginald Hargreeves, who creates the Umbrella Academy and prepares his "children" to save the world. In their teenage years, though, the family fractures and the team disbands. Fast forward to the present time, when the six surviving members of the clan reunite upon the news of Hargreeves' passing. They work together to solve a mystery surrounding their father's death, but divergent personalities and abilities again pull the estranged family apart, and a global apocalypse is another imminent threat. 

Sherlock - Dr. John Watson is a war vet just home from Afghanistan. He meets the brilliant but eccentric Holmes when the latter, who serves as a consultant to Scotland Yard, advertises for a flatmate. Almost as soon as Watson moves into the Baker Street flat, they are embroiled in mysteries, and Sherlock's nemesis, Moriarty, appears to have a hand in the crimes.  Available on Netflix. 5/5

Stranger Things - In 1980s Indiana, a group of young friends witness supernatural forces and secret government exploits. As they search for answers, the children unravel a series of extraordinary mysteries. Available on Netflix. 5/5

Twilight Zone - It's a strange mix of horror, science-fiction, drama, comedy and superstition. Serling introduced each episode, and many of the black and white episodes concluded with a surprise ending. Available on Netflix and Hulu. 5/5.

Outlander - After serving as a British Army nurse in World War II, Claire Randall is enjoying a second honeymoon in Scotland with husband Frank, an MI6 officer looking forward to a new career as an Oxford historian. Suddenly, Claire is transported to 1743 and into a mysterious world where her freedom and life are threatened. To survive, she marries Jamie Fraser, a strapping Scots warrior with a complicated past and a disarming sense of humour. A passionate relationship ensues, and Claire is caught between two vastly different men in two inharmonious lives. Available on Netflix and Hulu.

Probably DA:

The Magicians - Quentin Coldwater, a grad student at Brakebills College for Magical Pedagogy, has been fascinated by the magical fantasy world since he was young. But as he has gotten older, Quentin and his 20-something friends have discovered that the magical world they read about as children is not only real, but it poses dangers to humanity. While studying at the secret upstate New York school, the friends struggle to cope with the aftermath of a catastrophe that befalls the institution. Available on Netflix, Hulu, and the Syfy website. 5/5

Merlin - This action-packed fantasy-drama revisits the saga of King Arthur and his wizard, Merlin, by focusing on the two characters when they were ambitious young men struggling to understand their destinies. In this telling, Prince Arthur is known to be the heir to the throne (no sword from the stone here). And he is acquainted with all those who will one day form the legend of Camelot, including Lancelot, Guinevere, and Morgana. Merlin is also forced to deal with King Uther's Great Purge, which bans all use of magic. Available on Netflix. 5/5

The Order - When Belgrave University student Jack Morton joins a fabled secret society, the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose, he is thrust into a world of magic, monsters and intrigue. Out to avenge his mother's death, he uncovers dark family secrets and lands in an underground battle being waged between werewolves and practitioners of dark magic. Assisting Jack in the fight is Alyssa, a tour guide at Belgrave and fellow member of the Order, which is led by Jack's estranged father.  Available on Netflix. 4/5.

Legion - David Haller is a troubled young man who was diagnosed with schizophrenia as a child. Shuffled from one psychiatric institution to the next, in his early 30s, David met and fell in love with a beautiful and troubled fellow patient named Syd. After a startling encounter with her, he was forced to confront the shocking possibility that the voices he hears and the visions he sees may actually be real. Syd led David to Melanie Bird, a demanding but nurturing therapist who heads a team of specialists -- Ptonomy, Kerry, and Cary -- each of whom possesses a unique and extraordinary gift. Together, they helped David to recognize and harness his hidden abilities and unlock a deeply suppressed truth -- he had been haunted his entire life by a malicious parasite of unimaginable power.  Available on Hulu. 4/5.

Comedy:

Derry Girls - Following Erin and her friends as they grow up in a world of armed police in armoured Land Rovers and British Army check points in 1990s Northern Ireland and attempt to navigate the highs and lows of being teenagers. Available on Netflix. 5/5

Detective/military:

Broadchurch - When the corpse of an 11-year-old British boy, Danny Latimer, is found bloodied and dirty on an idyllic beach, a small Dorset community becomes the focus of a police investigation and media madness. Out-of-town Detective Inspector Alec Hardy gets the point position over Detective Sgt. Ellie Miller -- who feels the job should have been hers. Slowly, more members of the community of Broadchurch are drawn into the investigation. While dealing with so much unwelcome attention, Danny's family tries to cope with its grief. When a suspect is named and charged, the ensuing trial sees the defendant promising to expose more of the townspeople's secrets.  Available on Netflix. 5/5.

Haven - FBI Agent Audrey Parker arrives in Haven, Maine, on what she believes is a routine assignment. But the longer she stays, the more curious she becomes -- about the townspeople, who seem to be beset by a range of supernatural afflictions; about the town itself, which contains many secrets; and about her own surprising connection to this strange place.  Available on Netflix and Tubi.  4/5.

A Very Secret Service - At the height of the Cold War in 1960, André Merlaux joins the French Secret Service and contends with enemies both foreign and bureaucratic.  In French with English Subtitles.  Available on Netflix. 5/5.

Criminal Minds - An elite squad of FBI profilers analyzes the country's most-twisted criminal minds, anticipating the perpetrators' next moves before they can strike again. Each member of the "mind hunter" team brings his or her expertise to pinpoint predators' motivations and identify emotional triggers to stop them. The core group includes an official profiler who is highly skilled at getting into the minds of criminals, a quirky genius, the former media liaison who manages to adeptly balance family life and the job, and a computer wizard.  Available on Netflix and CBS.  5/5

Eureka - In the years since World War II, the U.S. government has been relocating the world's geniuses (and their families) to the Pacific Northwest town of Eureka. Daily life there shifts between amazing innovation and total chaos. U.S. Marshal Jack Carter learns this first-hand when his car breaks down in Eureka, stranding him among the town's eccentric citizens. When they unleash a scientific creation still unknown to the outside world, it's up to Carter to restore order. Subsequently, he's let in on one of America's best-kept secrets.  Available on Amazon Prime.  5/5.

Our Girl - Taking destiny into their own hands, British Army female medics of 2 Sections are dispatched on different missions, where they encounter the heartbreak and realities of life on the battlefield.  5/5.

Political:

The Crown - This lavish, Netflix-original drama chronicles the life of Queen Elizabeth II from the 1940s to modern times. The series begins with an inside look at the early reign of the queen, who ascended the throne at age 25 after the death of her father, King George VI. As the decades pass, personal intrigues, romances, and political rivalries are revealed that played a big role in events that shaped the later years of the 20th century.  Available on Netflix. 4/5.

Victoria - The monarch's life is chronicled as the story begins with the death of King William IV in 1837, her accession to the throne at the tender age of 18 and her relationships with the influential forces around her. With the advice of the prime minister Lord Melbourne and the support of her husband Prince Albert the young queen flourishes and establishes herself in her newfound role. Available on Amazon Prime. 4/5.

[auntynationalsblog]

Fargo: Top 10 Characters

Television shows like Breaking Bad, The Sopranos and The Wire are definitely three of the greatest in the genre of non-fantasy dramas, thrillers, and crime fiction. If you love those three shows, but you are unfamiliar with Fargo, stop whatever you are doing, and watch it now. Right now. Thank me later. 

One of the reasons why Fargo is a work of genius is the intensity and depth of its characters. These characters, in my opinion, have earned the right to be categorized alongside Walter White, Tony Soprano, Omar Little and Don Draper, as some of the legendary TV characters of all time. This blog takes a look at eleven of the most astonishing characters Fargo has provided to the world of television. 

Beware of spoilers, obviously. 

Consolation Prize: Lester Nygaard (Season 1)

“Old Lester, now, he would've just let it slide. But not this guy.”

Played by Martin Freeman, or better known as Dr. John Watson from the twenty-first-century version of Sherlock Holmes, Lester Nygaard is a loser. Like all losers, we tend to feel bad for him, until his personality develops in a way which makes us abandon our pity for him. Pity is replaced by disgust, and sadness is replaced by anger. Lester’s transformation from a good-for-nothing non-achiever to a devious and heartless criminal and fugitive is definitely one of the most subtle character developments I’ve seen on TV. His role is often overshadowed by two other characters from the same season. Very important character nonetheless, brilliantly portrayed by Freeman.  

10. Wes Wrench/Mr. Wrench (Season 1, Season 3)

“ “

Played by the deaf, yet brilliant actor - Russel Harvard - Mr. Wrench also can’t hear. What can do is kill. He is an assassin, and he is loyal and lethal. He appears in the first season as one-half of the committed team of Mr. Wrench and Mr. Numbers (Grady Numbers). Wrench’s childish attitude is quick to win the hearts of the audience, while his kill skills and will-power earn him a spot on this list. After losing his partner (Mr. Numbers) in a gunfight, he is spared by his partner’s killer because the killer was himself impressed by Wrench’s skills and character. He reappears in season three as an invaluable accomplice to another character on this list, a role which makes us love him even more. 

9.  Molly Solverson (Season 1)

“Got to love a man who keeps his word, right?“

Played by Allison Tolman, Molly is the walking-definition of a young and hungry-for-justice police officer. A daughter to a police officer and a granddaughter to a sheriff, Molly is the character that makes us nurture the hope that there is hope for goodness and justice. After losing her murdered chief early on in the show, who is replaced by an incompetent one, Molly takes up the challenge of solving her chief’s murder all by herself, and she quickly finds herself trapped in a world of assassins and conspiracies. But despite being shot and hospitalized, she just does not give in, acting as the top cop that she isn’t. The character even earned Tolman the Emmy and Golden Globe nominations. 

8. V.M. Varga (Season 3)

“The past is unpredictable.”

Played by David Thewlis, or as we know him - Professor Remus ‘Mooney’ Lupin - from the Harry Potter world, Varga is sick, and in all likelihood he will make you sick to the stomach. Sadistic and ruthless, with a portrait of Joseph Stalin on his desk, Varga uses a businessman hitherto leading a happy and normal life to further his money laundering scheme. Intimidation and disposal seem to be his key tactics to success, apparent when he makes the businessman’s subordinate drink his own urine as a punishment for acting suspiciously. With the worst teeth on the show, and probably suffering from bulimia, Thewlis’ villainous role does not allow us to take even a one minute break between episodes.    

7. Floyd Gerhardt (Season 2)

“Three times, I sent men to do a job. Three times, they come back unfinished. I'll handle this myself.”

Played by Jean Smart, Floyd Gerhardt inherited one of the most difficult jobs in the world. After her husband Otto, the head of the Gerhardt crime syndicate, suffers a stroke and is unable to lead the mafia any longer, Floyd takes over all the guns and the money. Her eldest boy, Dodd, is unwilling to accept a woman, who is also old, as the new mafia don. However, throughout the season, Floyd shows us who’s boss as she uses an iron hand to deal with a rival gang from Kansas City and to investigate the homicide of her youngest son. One of the characteristics of Floyd which makes us like her so much is her love and concern for her granddaughter, who is mostly abused and humiliated by her father Dodd. The characters in season 2 are the strongest, but without Floyd, none of the other characters would be as appealing as they are. 

6. Gloria Burgle (Season 3)

“There’s violence to knowing the world isn't what you thought.”

Played by Carrie Coon, Gloria is the older version of Molly Solverson. After finding her stepdad murdered via asphyxiation, Gloria’s investigation leads to bizarre outcomes that find her entwined in something very big and very dangerous. A recently divorced woman, whose position of Chief also got taken away, her new Chief is simply intolerable, who demands of her to let go of the investigation. But like Molly, she just doesn’t give up, and her relentless pursuit constitutes the heart of the third season. Gloria is an example of how some police officers simply cannot be intimidated or corrupted into submission. The final scene of Fargo is a conversation between Varga and Gloria, and arguably, that tense scene is one of the best dialogue exchanges in the series. A true superhero. 

5. Lou Solverson (Season 2)

“Am I the only one here who’s clear on the concept of law enforcement?”

A loving father, a caring husband and the hotshot cop of town, Lou Solverson, played by Patrick Wilson, is your Marvel/DC superhero. Lou actually made his first appearance in the first season, as Molly’s father - former cop currently running a diner. In the second season, we are given a glimpse of Lou’s glory days as he single-handedly takes on both the Gerhardt Family and the Kansas City Mafia. Two things to note about Lou’s character - fearlessness and morality. Lou just does not submit to intimidation, as is seen in his confrontations with Mike Milligan on one occasion and with the Gerhardt Family on another. On the latter aspect, Lou is forced to take in his long-time friend Ed Blumquist on charges of murder, but the element of friendship does not deter Lou to do what he knows is his duty and is morally right. 

4. Mike Milligan (Season 2)

“If the goal is to kill those who oppress you, what does it matter who goes first?”

Played by Bokeem Woodbine, Mike Milligan is the epitome of suave. A well-read man, who often uses poetic quotes out of nowhere to dramatize his point, Mike is an assassin working for the Kansas City Mafia, and is in charge of ripping the Gerhardt Family apart. Arguably the most cunning and nefarious character of the second season, what sets Mike apart from other villains is the unbelievable aura of calm he brings to a seemingly tense situation. Varga does that too, but Mike does it better. Intelligence is his most lethal weapon, as his loyal henchmen, known as The Kitchen Brothers, carry out most of the bloodshed for him. At the end, although Mike meets a fate worse than death, most of us would die to be him during a gang-war.  

3. Lorne Malvo (Season 1)

“There are no saints in the animal kingdom. Only breakfast and dinner.”

Played by the former husband of Angelina Jolie, Billy Bob Thornton’s portrayal of Lorne Malvo goes down as the greatest villainous role in Fargo. Malvo, in simple words, is pure evil. He does not care. He is a predator, with an ideology best put as, “kill or be killed”.  He begins an unusual friendship with the Lester Nygaard, whose character is antithetical to that of Malvo. He even saves Lester from arrest and gradually, through his venomous words, turns him from an innocent loser into a evil loser. Eventually, Lester tries to show him who’s boss, realizing he couldn’t have made a worse choice about who to fuck around with. The personification of evil that is Malvo, can be categorized with characters such an Anton Chigurh, the Joker and Hans Gruber (who has an unusual physical resemblance with Malvo) on the list of the greatest villains of all time. 

2. Ohanzee “Hanzee” Dent (Season 2)

“ “Send the Indian,” they'd say. “Who cares about booby traps? Give Hanzee a flashlight and a knife and send him down into the black echo.” ” 

Played by Zahn McClarnon, Hanzee Dent is not an evil guy. He is a bad man, sure. But he is not EVIL. He is not a villain. Society alienated him, treated him like a mongrel and made him a ticking time-bomb only seconds away from the boom. A native-american assassin recruited by Otto Gerhardt from a very young age, Hanzee appears to be a loyal hit-man for the Gerhardt Family, until he loses his shit. An unstoppable force and a ruthless killer with a history of military service (Vietnam), Hanzee has an agenda of his own. His killing spree is triggered by a sign outside a pub boasting about murders of 22 Sioux Indians who were hung there, with a puddle of dried vomit beneath it. Arguably the most complicated character of the show, with an intense development of personality, Hanzee Dent is the only character in the show who is a lethal assassin but makes us pity him and root for him. 

One Last Consolation Prize: Peggy Blumquist (Season 2)

“I just wanted to be someone.” 

Played by Kirsten Dunst, or Mary Jane from the Tobey Maguire Spiderman series, Peggy Blumquist is the source of all the drama. After she accidentally runs over the youngest Gerhardt son, Rye Gerhardt, her husband, Ed Blumquist (another brilliant character) becomes number one on the Gerhardt Family’s blacklist, and acquires the nickname - The Butcher of Luverne. Peggy should not be perceived as stupid or a trouble-maker. Throughout the show, she feels what many of us also feel, that we are not living up to our potential. Her interests conflict with her husband’s interests, but eventually she does everything in her capacity to clean up the mess that she (unintentionally) created, and to save her husband from the cops and the mafia. Her portrayal by Dunst was vastly appreciated by critics and fans alike, but in a show comprising of so many awesome characters, it was impossible for me to include Peggy in my top ten.  

1. Nikki Swango (Season 3)

“You've made me the happiest woman ever. Now, let's make a sex tape.”

In Fargo, we have super-heroes, heroes, villains and super-villains, and we have Nikki Swango, portrayed by Mary Elizabeth Winstead. Right from the moment we saw her eliminate a threat to her grand plan with the help an air-conditioner, Nikki provided Fargo with the most unique ‘unique character’. A genius who utilizes her intellect in a professional game of cards (Bridge), she may be, at first, perceived as selfish and shallow. But towards the end, it is evident that she actually did love her fiance Ray Stussy, and wasn’t just using him for her personal ambitions. It is hard to put a hero/villain label on her because she embodies the key characteristics of both roles - empathy, willpower, deviousness, ruthlessness and a thick skin. Her partnership with Mr. Wrench, her plan to execute the entire squad led by Varga AND extort two million dollars from him has to be one of the most memorable moments of the series. Not to forget how she, along with Wrench, hijacked the truck carrying all the documents needed by the IRS to prosecute Varga. Simply put, Nikki Swango is the badass of the show. 

So that’s my list. I won’t ask you to like or comment on my blog (some feedback would be appreciated though). All I want from the world of Netflix, is that this TV show receives the viewership and appreciation that it deserves, which it hasn’t gotten yet. 

[whcdunit]

“i’m never doing this with you again.” sure, troy was a detective and it was his job to help those who needed helping. but this situation was requiring more help than he deemed himself capable of giving. his feet were fucking killing him and they didn’t have a single lead. “he’s your friend. how are you at a complete loss when it comes to finding him? if he runs off all the bloody time you should be old hat at dragging him home again by now.” 

@slecths​

[couchdetective]

The Murder on the Links, by Agatha Christie

(spoilers below)

The plot of Murder on the Links hinges on the device of a faked crime turned into a real one. M. Reynaud, to escape the blackmail of a former accomplice who knows of his criminal past, plots with his wife to fake his own murder. But someone steps in at the last moment and actually murders him, taking advantage of all his careful planning to conceal their own identity. Agatha Christie recycles this device in a later story about the theft of government papers—and then has the exquisite gall to recycle the recycling, by attributing it in Cards on the Table to her alter ego Mrs. Ariadne Oliver the mystery novelist, whose reused plot is spotted by Hercule Poirot.

The identity of the person who took advantage of M. Reynaud’s plans requires Poirot to delve into Reynaud’s past, and contend with the arrogance of the French policeman Giraud, who scorns psychological methods and clues larger than a few inches. I think this is the first Poirot novel where (unlike in Poirot’s first appearance in The Mysterious Affair at Styles) Poirot speaks slightingly of minute physical examinations of the crime scene and reliance on physical evidence. He says that gathering detailed physical evidence is for the lesser investigators, who just confirm what Poirot can figure out based on psychology and the more obvious physical clues. He’s hilarious on the subject: like Hastings, I laughed “immoderately” when Poirot asked if, in a fox-hunt, Hastings would descend to the ground, “smelling with your nose and uttering loud Ow-Ows,” or whether he would leave that job to the hounds. This is also the first novel where “the little grey cells” come up repeatedly. Of course Poirot soundly defeats Giraud, and acquires a nice little prize out of the contest.

Poirot also faces opposition from his own dear Hastings. Hastings is in love with “Cinderella,” the hilariously unladylike girl he meets on a train ride home from France. (Murder on the Links was published in 1923, and WWI is still fresh in Hastings’ memory, so the train ride makes him melancholy). Cinderella turns out to be Dulcie Duveen, trying to protect her twin sister Bella, Jack’s jilted girlfriend, from being arrested for murdering Reynaud. Hastings, in his typical bumbling fashion, thinks Dulcie is Bella (they’re not identical, Hastings is just an endearing doof), and guilty of murdering Reynaud (mistaking him for his son) after being mistreated by Jack. Based on this profound misunderstanding, Hastings resolves to protect her—and comes up with an ingenious way of doing it, flummoxing even Poirot. So this is another shining example of romance being key to Christie’s plots. Who is truly in love with who drives the plot, and helps solve the murder. Which love-interest is the “siren” (as Poirot puts it), and which is the true love? Hastings claims to admire Marthe Daubreuil, and to dislike Cinderella and see her as too unladylike for him, but actually he loves Cinderella and will fight Poirot for her. Likewise, Jack thinks he’s in love with Marthe but truly loves Bella. The first-time reader will be neatly tricked if they assume that, because Marthe seems a sweet, faithful, pious village girl, she must be the true love, and Dulcie and Bella—unladylike acrobatic performers—are the “sirens.”

I think the need to solve the romance in order to solve the crime is key to why Christie wrote such satisfying mysteries. In The Mysterious Affair at Styles, Poirot says he let John Cavendish be tried for murder to reconcile him with his wife Mary, because “The happiness of one man and one woman is the most important thing in the world.” I think that gets to the heart of why the classical mystery genre is so comforting, in its way. The untimely death of one person is a catastrophe that must be investigated and solved. And, on the flip side—as Christie affirms—the hearts and the happiness of the individuals concerned are of prime importance. I think the best mysteries understand this. Elementary succeeds as a tv show, for me, because of the emphasis on quirky individuality and personal relationships, which Elementary takes farther than Christie by respecting unconventionality in personal matters. Joan and Sherlock have a platonic life partnership; Joan has a child with no romance; Sherlock has a series of interesting relationships; their cases involve many configurations of households and romances.

One thing Christie does to great effect is to use a trope but not make it clear, until the very end, whether she’s playing it straight or subverting it. She does that here, with the trope of two innocent lovers, Jack Reynaud and Bella Duveen, each “confessing” to the murder because each thinks the other is the real guilty party and wants to shield them. Here it’s played straight: Jack and Bella really are innocent, and confessing out of a genuine urge to shield each other. In at least two other Christie stories, though, the trope is a blind: the lovers actually plotted the murder together, and then make “confessions” that are designed to be seen through and exposed as an attempt to shield each other.

Agatha Christie wasn’t a feminist, but there are sometimes deep strains of feminism running through her novels regardless. And here, that’s the case. Dulcie is independent, protective of her sister, brave, and crucial (through her quick thinking and acrobatic skills) to capturing the murderer. Hastings tries to be chivalrous to her, and it makes him ridiculous. Dulcie masterfully uses his chivalrous idiocy to steal evidence she thinks will incriminate Bella. Later, when he tries to tell her to be careful while climbing a tree that he (who is not a professional acrobat) has just climbed, she laughs at him. The cleverness and courage of two women, Dulcie Duveen and Mme Reynaud, are crucial to capturing the murderer (another woman, as it happens). Meanwhile, Hastings, exemplar of English chivalry, flounders around, gallantly shielding someone who doesn’t need it, and trying to protect someone who ends up saving the day.

Christie’s obsession with heredity shows up here too. What saves her from being a eugenicist is (1) her value for individual freedom, especially in matters of love, and (2) her acknowledgment that heredity is complicated, that everyone has both “good” and “bad” traits in their family. Here, Jack Reynaud at the end is scared to marry Bella knowing that he is the son of a murderer—and Poirot reminds him that he’s also the son of his mother, a great woman, courageous and loving.

Christie was clearly trying to pack Hastings off in this book, marrying him and sending him to the Argentine, perhaps as a prelude to retiring Poirot completely, just like Arthur Conan Doyle was trying to pack Watson off in The Sign of Four. Tough luck for both authors.

[possiblyimbiassed]

Poisonous connections

While re-reading John’s blog post The Poison Giant, I realised something:

There’s a subtle connection between The Six Napoleons /Thatchers, Mary Morstan and The Sign of the Four/Three, in ACD canon as well as in BBC Sherlock. And the blog’s author might have used a reference to a Rathbone movie to further highlight this connection.

Indeed, ACD seems to reiterate certain events, elements or symbols of his stories throughout his whole Holmes work, just like Mofftiss are doing in BBC Sherlock. In this meta I’ll try to point out some of them, and speculate a bit on their meaning as subtext.

“It all started when i received an email. There was no text just a picture of a pearl. I assumed it was spam, but then, the next day, there was another one. Another email, another picture. Another pearl. And again and again. Six days, six pearls.”

This blog post is written directly after The Empty Hearse, and the case happens after Sherlock’s return, when John is already living with Mary. Apart from the dates and the order of the blogposts, we can deduce this from the fact that Sherlock calls John on his heart phone in the morning to discuss the case, which he wouldn’t need to do if they lived together at the time: 

But to me this whole case, with six anonymous pearls, sounds very much taken from canon’s The Sign of the Four (SIGN), where Miss Mary Morstan first was a client who seeked help from Holmes regarding her father’s disappearance. 

Miss Morstan: “The same day there arrived through the post a small cardboard box addressed to me, which I found to contain a very large and lustrous pearl. No word of writing was enclosed. Since then every year upon the same date there has always appeared a similar box, containing a similar pearl, without any clue as to the sender.”

Watson goes on to tell us how Miss Morstan “opened a flat box as she spoke and showed me six of the finest pearls that I had ever seen.”  So just like in the blog post, there were six pearls in total. But in canon Mary was the one who received the pearls, while in BBC Sherlock it was John, at least that’s what he says.

In BBC Sherlock, when John and Sherlock go to investigate the origin of the pearl e-mails, they find a laptop and a man murdered by a poisoned dart. In TSoT Sherlock very briefly tells the guests on John’s wedding about this case: 

The dart-blowing James Swandale from this case is not very unlike the character Tonga in SIGN; a small man who is killing his victims by blowing highly poisonous darts at them.

While re-reading SIGN I encountered some themes that I know are repeated with similar stories later in ACD’s work:

The six valuable pearls that Miss Morstan receives by mail have similarities to the six plaster busts that are smashed in The Six Napoleons (SIXN). One of them contains a hidden, valuable pearl (Pearl of the Borgias). The pearls in SIGN are part of the Agra treasure, which is ultimately lost. In SIXN, however, the pearl is the treasure, and it’s ultimately found.

In SIGN we learn that Miss Morstan’s father was a retired military officer, whose emotion while confronted with someone from his past caused him a heart attack. He fell, hit his head on a sharp edge and died. Very much like the retired Colonel James Barclay in The Crooked Man (CROO), who was shocked when confronted with his old rival, fell and hit his head on a sharp edge, and died. Neither of the characters from the past was actually guilty of murder, but they both found it wise to either get out of there or get rid of the body, in order to not get incriminated.

Another retired officer in SIGN, John Sholto, had the sins of his past reaching up on him in the shape of a fellow officer and accomplice (Morstan). This meant a threat of exposure, scandal, loss of his wealth and probably prison, which ultimately worsened his enlarged spleen so much that he died. Before he passed, he told his son about his criminal past. Very much the same thing happened to Victor Trevor’s father in The Gloria Scott (GLOR), who had a stroke, confessed to Victor (via a letter) and later died. 

I think ACD’s way of writing recurring themes is very much imitated in BBC Sherlock. 

But if the killer in the blog post case was small, why does John call him “The Poison Giant”? Why does John, who isn’t very tall himself, mock a considerably shorter guy by calling him the opposite? A rather low blow, isn’t it? Well that was my first impression, but there might actually be something more to this.

For a start, here we have something that’s repeated by Eurus in TFP:

Someone is trying to inject our protagonists with something dangerous, administered by small darts. John tells us, in his blog post, about Swandale: “He was, to be honest, terrifying. And he had his poisoned dart with him.” At the end of the story we learn that someone apparently wanted to kill both Sherlock and John.

But there’s also another criminal involved: “And he had a friend. A big friend. A really big friend. Sherlock recognised him as Phil Dickinson, known to some as The Headcrusher. So, there we were being chased across a rooftop by Swandale and his poisoned dart only to run straight into this bloke who could break me in half with his bare hands.”

And, to top it, a third ‘feature of interest’ (my bolding): “The big clue we had to go on was that Swandale had got hold of the plans of a house belonging to some pop star from the 90s called Giles Conover.”

A quick Google search reveals that Giles Conover is a character from one of the Basil Rathbone adaptations of Sherlock Holmes: The Pearl of Death from 1944:

Conover is one of the criminal antagonists to Holmes in the film (which can be seen here), and the other one is "The Hoxton Creeper", a giant man who is known for breaking the back of his victims with his bare hands.  

The Headcrusher in John’s blog post doesn’t seem very far from The Creeper in The Pearl of Death, does he? Both are extremely tall men. But this also seems to tie into The Golem from TGG:

The Golem is not specifically described as “tall” by John’s blogpost The Great Game, though, only as “a monster” and “barely human”:

“He also worked out what had killed the security guard. I say 'what' although technically it was 'who'. But, having seen the man, 'what' is probably a better definition. He was an assassin known as the Golem. He killed people by squeezing the air out of their body with his bare hands!”

“The Golem was there and it killed her. Then, it attacked Sherlock. I don't think I've actually seen him scared before. Me, I was bricking it! I'd seen horror in Afghanistan. But this man was barely human. He really was a monster! I managed to rescue Sherlock (by whacking the Golem with my gun - I never said I was subtle) but the creature got away.”

So, we have two cases in BBC Sherlock where the criminal they’re chasing is an extremely tall man; once in John’s blog description and the other one in the visual description of the show. And they both fit in nicely with this Rathbone adaptation character. But not with canon, as far as I can see?

In summary, we have the following ‘features of interest’:

The Pearls from the Treasure

The Sins of the Past

The Heart

The Poison and the Darts

The Small Man

The Giant

What subtext can we see in this? Well, there’s this couple of male friends - one small, one big. Who might that resemble? ;) There’s also the matter of the Heart, leaning hard on the Sins of the Past. Seems familiar? Then we have the Pearls, connecting to a treasure. But these things seem a bit unattainable, don’t they? At least this far... In SIGN there’s also a couple of twins - Thaddeus and Bartholomew Sholto. One of them - Bartholomew (for some unknown reason) has a chemistry lab in his house, just like Holmes. And he is murdered by the small man Tonga, basically because he wants to keep the Agra treasure. Thaddeus, the other twin, gives (at least parts of) the treasure to Mary Morstan, and he lives. But Thaddeus is a nervous, twitchy little man who seems rather isolated. Is he happy? I doubt it. And he even loses the treasure - the part that he has not already given away.

And finally, there’s the Poison. Why do Sherlock and John always get drugged, or (almost) poisoned? Is their connection so dangerous - is it poisoned? Well, that might be what Sherlock believes, sadly. But the only real, successful poisoners we have had in this show are a) Jeff Hope, b) Doctor Frankland and c) Jim Moriarty. And they’re all dead. But what if the ‘poison’ that Sherlock and John so fear is actually The Chemistry of Love? Administered by Darts = Cupido? ;) ;) ;)

As a little bonus, there’s also another curious detail from SIGN; this illustration by Richard Gutschmidt:

Look at Thaddeus Sholto’s neat little oriental side-table! It does have a high resemblance to this prop from 221B in BBC Sherlock, hasn’t it? (X) :)

Tagging some people who might be interested: @ebaeschnbliah @raggedyblue @gosherlocked @sarahthecoat @sagestreet​ @mathilderunout​ @loveismyrevolution​ @tendergingergirl​ @tjlcisthenewsexy​

[teawaffles]

Forbidden Games: Chapter 8 / End

“I didn’t know you put steel plates in your coat…… Are you really a university professor?”

“I’ve been kidnapped by a criminal organisation in the past. Since then, I’ve been a bit more careful about my own safety.” [1]

William explained it away without a second thought, as Sherlock handed him back his coat.

With their victory complete, the two men had freed the young noble and watched Alan and his men being taken away by the Yard. Now they were standing in front of the club building, and idly chatting near a carriage.

“Well, I was somewhat worried they wouldn’t fall for our trick.”

“That part was indeed uncertain, but I was confident that Alan would stop the match. He’s the type of person who will not enter a game unless his own safety is secured; once the possibility of defeat is introduced, he’ll promptly call off the match.”

“Exactly. In fact, that guy didn’t even point his gun at you, but just tried to start a new game,” Sherlock agreed.

Although he had also predicted Alan’s movements, he knew it was not an easy task to manipulate their opponent into terminating the match.

William had set Alan up with a revolver that may or may not have fired on the next turn, and skilfully sowed enough doubt to push him to stop the match of his own accord.

Sherlock admired the university professor for having succeeded in such a high-stakes bluff.

“Anyway, I’m grateful to you for getting us out of there, Liam.”

“It is I who should be thanking you. We were able to eliminate some concerning elements which might have endangered my students, and with that we are even. ……However, I do apologise to Dr Watson for accompanying you this far on your investigation.”

“Even if he was jealous, I know John would never hold a grudge. For now though, I’ll have to take the credit for your achievement.”

“You speak too highly of me. In fact, it was precisely because you were able to understand my intentions, Mr Holmes, that we were able to succeed. If it were anyone else, the situation would not have been resolved with such grace,” William chuckled.

In a serious tone, Sherlock continued.

“However, Liam…… did you know in advance that Alan was going to suggest Russian roulette?”

William put on the coat he received from Sherlock earlier.

It was thanks to this coat that Sherlock had avoided a fatal injury despite being shot. But looking at it another way, one might also think that William had predicted that Sherlock would be shot.

To predict the events of their final match beforehand, one would need nothing short of divine intuition. However, the man who had been asked this question simply flashed a troubled smile.

“That would be reading too far into the matter. Regarding this coat, the steel plates were prepared just in case I found myself in a tight spot. When it comes to a fight, as you pursue dangerous criminals on a daily basis, Mr Holmes, I believe you are better suited to use it. Then as far as that last game was concerned, since we heard about it from another party in the hall earlier, it was conceivable that this coat would be put to good use.”

“Hmm…… Well, that’s true.”

William’s humble explanation convinced even Sherlock, albeit grudgingly.

——Sherlock thought over the matter.

Suppose that in today’s case, even without the job from his client, Alan and his accomplices had been scheduled to be taken down. If one were to do thorough research ahead of time, based on Alan’s nature, one could expect him to force his opponent into a game where he has the upper hand. If that was the case, what if one was able to obtain prior knowledge about the game itself?

Indeed, the man who had told them about Russian roulette said he’d heard about it from another social circle. That is to say, knowledge about the game had spread to this club from a third party. Then that party could have also deliberately spread the word about how to cheat.

With these preparations in place, they would enter the club and contact the target. Because they knew the exact game and trickery their opponent would use, they could then employ that knowledge to manipulate their opponent. And a certain detective’s investigation would prove the perfect opportunity to do so.

It was a possibility, Sherlock concluded.

This person had thoroughly examined their enemy’s humanity, the means they would use, and the number of people he had with him, then used that knowledge to vanquish him. In addition, they would have needed an information network spanning the entirety of Britain’s high society, and Sherlock knew of a certain mastermind who possessed just that.

Just then, he remembered how that man had looked at him before the game began, and the feeling that had struck him in that moment: of his entire body being entangled in strings.

He’d gotten the same feeling when investigating some of his cases. Upon solving a “riddle”, it felt as if everything had been designed to be as such — as if he had been manipulated with invisible strings, and he’d felt helpless to resist.

A string that came from his gaze. And another that he occasionally felt manipulating him during the investigation.

If he were to follow these two threads, the person at the other end of them would be——.

Having advanced his deductions up to this point, Sherlock glanced at the man beside him.

“What’s the matter, Mr Holmes?”

That man looked at him with an unconcerned expression.

“No, it’s nothing.”

Sherlock shook his head, as if to shake off his thoughts.

These theories were only possibilities, which could never leave the realm of speculation. As that man had said, it was more reasonable to see their victory as the outcome of a series of happy coincidences. Surely there was nothing to be gained from crudely pursuing this train of thought.

Even so, if it was this man at the other end of those strings…

That thought sent Sherlock’s heart racing.

“Since the case has been solved, let me see you off at the station.”

As the conversation died down, William opened the door to the carriage.

Sherlock uttered a word of thanks as he climbed in, the determination in his heart renewed.

——Just you wait, “Lord of Crime”.

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

As he’d stood next to Sherlock, William’s thoughts about the case had also been racing through his mind.

A mathematical formula cannot become a theorem until it is “proven”.

You must solve all the riddles I have set, and prove the existence of the Lord of Crime. Therefore, even if the worst possible scenario — a shootout — were to take place, I had to make sure you survived.

William, who had manipulated the entire case from behind the scenes, smiled once more. As planned, the detective had made it out alive.

The “Lord of Crime” had strings extended in every direction. William eagerly awaited the day Sherlock would follow them and hunt him down.

Thus ended the untold case in which two extraordinary men joined hands.

The crime consultant, William James Moriarty.

The consulting detective, Sherlock Holmes.

The game of geniuses betting on the future of the Empire, continues.

Footnotes:

[1] See Chapter 4 of the manga (“The Case of the Noble Kidnapping”).

T/N: I thought this story really puts Chapter 47 of the manga (“The Two Criminals, Act 4”) into perspective. Also, these events actually took place at the tail end of Chapter 31, before William saw Sherlock off. The more we know!