#💀💀whoops

[lightasthesun]

anyone ever burnt their throat before in a way that makes it feel like you have a sore throat every time you swallow?

Me neither... Until today.

[circuitcircus]

in defense of kabumisu……..

addressing things I see people say about why kabru being shipped w mithrun is ‘bad��� or why their canon relationship ‘doesn’t mean anything’ while also clearing up misconceptions of the characters some fans have

listen it keeps popping up and I just gotta do this or my brain will melt (if you don’t see it around then god I wish that were me) there’s an age gap!- erm there’s also an age gap in farcille (ily), the most popular ship in the series...also chilchuck looks like a kid but a lot of fans recognize him as a dilf because of his relative age, so there should be no age gap discourse among adult characters because it feels so conditional tbh

kabru taking care of mithrun is racist!- marcille likes to take care of others as well. is that sexist, or just an aspect of her character?

kabru isn’t treated like a servant, waiting on mithrun hand and foot…I mean he gives mithrun a foot massage but no one told him to do all that lmfao

he's also not the only one to care for mithrun. pattadol is shown to worry for him and milsril was the one to start taking care mithrun in the first place after he…...y’know. speaking of which-

they probably met when kabru was a kid!- neither of them showed signs of recognizing each other the entire time mithrun was introduced nor when they were together. and im pretty sure KABRU of all people would show some kind of recognition if they'd met before. it's kabru!!! the people person!!! mr. "i-noted-down-50+-characters-in-this-dude's-backstory-for-fun-and-actually-enjoy-social-gatherings"

you would think some kind of memory would come back to him especially after hearing mithrun’s backstory if milsril had even told kabru about him as a kid. but nope. it’s just fan speculation unless there's a side comic suggesting otherwise that i haven't seen

mithrun doesn't care about kabru, his shapeshift double looked like shit!- it's obviously because of mithrun's (then) lack of desires that it looked like that, but they really grow on each other

i think it's safe to assume it'd look more like kabru after they spent so much time together (also laios can barely even remember kabru's name..also saw his face multiple times and didn’t recognize him when they talked for the first time)

mithrun is racist!- he’s actually the least likely character to be racist since he lost his desires and that includes a desire for superiority over others. he even calls his past self out on that part of himself. the other elves in that side comic were being just as racist to shorter lived races but just didn’t use ‘outdated slurs’

(unfortunately literally every main character in dunmeshi is at least a lil prejudiced, but I believe it’s worldbuilding and a sign of the times rather than a reason ryoko kui is giving to hate each character)

taking care of others is a pain in the ass!- saying this as a reason kabru and mithrun shouldn't be together is basically saying disabled people shouldn't be allowed to have romantic relationships because they're a "burden"...if someone is actually willing to put in the work, then let them be.

that's not even all of their relationship, mithrun is the fighter of their duo and kabru would've been killed by the shapeshifter or something if he'd fallen down the hole on his own since he sucks at fighting monsters. mithrun helps collect ingredients for cooking every time, too (barometz fruits and griffin egg). he pulls his weight and then some!! i feel like people forget that part of mithrun a lot somehow.

+senshi literally cooks for everyone all time. it's kind of an important aspect of the narrative.

+also, while it is a popular fan thing I see around that kabru handfeeds mithrun, he literally never does lol this is mithrun using his own hands to eat:

also here we have him washing his own body

just saying because people like to treat mithrun like a baby even though the narrative respects him as a capable adult who also has special needs because of an accident. he’s captain for a reason

kabru hates taking care of mithrun!- not exactly, he was initially surprised and put off but got used to it quickly. i’m sure he’s grateful for all the times mithrun saved him from a monster and teleported them out of danger as well

he even starts doing “unnecessary” things for mithrun’s comfort and safety like when mithrun pushes himself too hard fighting, even after his mission to take care of him was complete when the canaries came back

here is even kabru resting while mithrun keeps watch (mithrun let him sleep for 5 hours before waking him up from the nightmare earlier, too):

there's nothing more to their relationship!- they actually have had a very tight and consistent dynamic since they met and they incite the most change within each other by the end. kabru is the one who inspires mithrun to create new desires so he doesn't waste away, and mithrun is the first person we see kabru being genuine with and it leads him to be more honest with others by the end instead of tiptoeing around everyone all the time (that mask was also the reason some ppl initially disliked kabru…)

kabru’s relationship with mithrun is honestly so important for his character and vice versa, but it’s often disregarded because of one over exaggerated aspect of it (an aspect that isn’t even the first way they interact with each other) or because people want to just straight up ignore it for some reason 🥲🥲

kui dedicates many panels to them that don't particularly serve the narrative as a whole in order to demonstrate this and i think that's pretty significant

you're taking this too seriously!- as if i'm the first person in the world to be crazy about a ship or the characters 😭 i love analyzing text and it's upsetting to see them mischaracterized when kui lays out the characters so clearly and deliberately

also they end up touching each other like all the time and have the kind of canon validation most ppl can only dream of lol i feel so insane look at this:

and this is just when they're first getting to know each other cuz there's a fuckload more

kinda hard to explain how i don't actually need them to get married or whatever but i'd die on this hill for them and i enjoy their dynamic immensely

haha you thought you were reading ship discourse but it was actually a character analysis 🤪🤪🤪

also don’t somehow take this to mean I think anyone has to ship them, I just need everyone to understand these accusations kind of don’t make sense especially when they can also apply to other pairs or characters

bonus kabru just looking at mithrun:

[ratwithhands]

An old sketch but for Mahoumas, this is one of the dreams Ingo has while he's failing to use his bow during training. It's fun to draw their new modified uniforms, but their first uniforms have their charm.

I didn't get to draw it (even though I planned to after finishing this), but Emmet is faster to pick up the blessing after they both sign to be champions. He learnt to how to transform first, cast with the staff first, and he used that to guide Ingo. Part of what makes using the bow so difficult for him is that it's a weapon he's not used to that he has to master alone. There aren't even many pro archers in Hisui, so it's hard to get anything done with it.

I have a sketch for that, a different nightmare Ingo had prior:

[jinglejails]

Pennywise carryin' some groceries.

[oddri-art]

When you've been in the trial for so long that even the ex-pops and prime assets are sick of dealing with your ass 💀

[milfcutlawquane]

"What was Sodor like then?"

"It was very quiet. I was the only engine on Sodor. They called me 'Master of the Railway' here too. I was very happy."

"What happened?"

"I started to break down. The mechanics didn't have parts for me. So, I was put in a siding. I had to wait for parts from my island. I waited, and waited. And now, I'm sure the parts will never come."

Thomas & Friends: Hero of the Rails (2009)

[mblue-art]

late halloweeen dooodleee

[joybeantown]

@solradguy FINISHED ONE SOLTOBER

I haven't used the calligraphy brush in a bit but i always liked how the lineart ends up so angular but wanted to draw sol with dizzys strive cut i thought it would be cute (hes not mad he just wants to look cool for dizzy) hope ya enjoy!also dragon install just chilling

[multifariousmediums]

What if Caboose had Snapchat?

[amphibia-a-day]

Day 1094 of Amphibia Screenshots

Episode: The Third Temple

[wassuppeeps]

Thinking about the traumatizing Super 4 fics I read when I was a kid (some were just like overly depressing and the rest were the absolute essence of problematic) 💀💀

[bear-cubs-art-things]

This was meant to be a sketch.....

[eliteseven]

BG3 Drabble: Parenthood?

Pairing: (named)F!Tav x Shadowheart

Summary: Yenna's presence in camp causes Shadowheart to contemplate something that was unthinkable during her time serving Shar.

Words: 4.5k

-------------------------------------------------------------------

There’s a sort of stirring from outside Shadowheart and Tav’s shared tent, slowly warming in the rays of the dawn’s first light. Shadowheart’s ear perks to the sound, as does her lover’s- and she shifts in the bedroll, her lips once again finding purchase in the crook of Tav’s neck. 

“Probably Scratch.” Serena concedes rather sleepily, arms wound tightly around Shadowheart’s hips, as if she fears she might disappear in the dead of night. 

“...Probably.” Shadowheart mumbles in agreement, the movement of her lips against the nape of Tav’s neck tickling her lover momentarily. 

She traces a lazy finger in the dip of Serena’s chest, drawing a soft whine of pleasure from her lover. 

Then, a new voice joins the fold. 

“...Are you awake yet?” A fiery, bright, reddish-orange head of hair pops through the tent flaps, and both Serena and Shadowheart startle, their foreheads colliding with a slam as they jump apart. 

“Oh, hells.” Shadowheart groans and clutches her head, and Serena winces as she gently peels herself from their tangled embrace. 

They’re lucky they had the common sense to dress themselves, after several intimate moments that took place in the night, fueled by wine and the privacy of their tent, shrouded in a spell of darkness, courtesy of Shadowheart. 

Serena reacts first. Owlishly, she blinks a few times, and regards their intruder with a little smile. 

Serena can’t help it. 

There is something endearing about the exuberant little girl, who offers to cook for them, and plays with Scratch, while she patiently awaits the return of her mother…

…A mother who might well be wiped from this very existence. 

Serena pushes those thoughts from her mind; they will find Yenna’s mother alive. 

“Good morning, Yenna.” Serena greets softly. “Did you sleep well?” 

“Hello, Tav!” Yenna gives her a gap-toothed grin, the very image of childish joy, and Serena chuckles softly. “Grub and I had the best sleep ever!” 

Lae’zel had remarked she’d start to lose respect around camp if she let a child call her by her nickname.

Serena can’t be bothered to care; she, too, was once a wide-eyed and eager child, so taken by the life of adventuring, of excitement. She’d much rather be a friend to a little girl who’s mother is missing, rather than an intimidating source of authority.

She’s had enough of that word for a lifetime. 

“Well, that’s very good. Cooking a spot of breakfast, are we?” Serena eyes the wooden spoon in her hand. 

“Well, yes, but I can’t find the ingredients I need.” Yenna explains, sounding suddenly downtrodden. “And I know how to make the best stew!” 

Serena nods, and then thinks for a moment. “...What if I took you to the city? I’m certain the vendors there would have everything you’d need.” 

Yenna wears a look of euphoria. “The city?!” She squeals, and vaguely, they hear Astarion curse her youthful glee, loud as it is at such an hour. 

Shadowheart whines softly under the cover of the furs, and Serena winces, remembering the three or four chalices of wine they’d shared. 

“Yes.” Serena whispers, gesturing for Yenna to keep her voice down. “We can go together. But you have to remember, everyone is sleeping, Yenna. We have to be quiet, until we leave-” 

“Got it!” Yenna’s whisper is nearly as loud as her shout, and Serena grins as she darts away to ready herself for their impromptu trip. 

Serena turns to find her lover observing her from the bedroll, head propped up on her elbow. 

Her lungs constrict; there will never be a moment in which she sees Shadowheart in her bedroll and won’t have a near heart-attack. 

She is that beautiful, of course, but more than that: she’s here. With Serena. In her bedroll. Where she sleeps, nightly. 

Simple facts such as these often matter very little to established couples; Serena thinks it’s nothing short of a travesty. 

Though their relationship is new- in the sense that Shadowheart has only recently admitted the full extent of her love for Serena- Serena knows she could never simply get used to the fact that Shadowheart is hers, as she is Shadowheart’s..

Shadowheart is smirking at her, just short of rolling her eyes, and Serena adores the expression, still. She’s long made peace with the fact that her love for Shadowheart is all-consuming; she’s learned to love her pouts, her smirks, the way she manages to make her very expressions drip with sarcasm. It’s uniquely her, and Serena would not trade her for any soul in all of Faerûn, ever. 

“What?” Serena asks sheepishly, brushing a stray hair from her eyes. 

“Nothing.” Shadowheart shrugs, but her eyes devour Tav as she does so. 

It’s clear she’s amused by something.

“It’s just…” Shadowheart drawls. “You’re very good with her.” 

Serena shrugs. “There’s nothing to it, really. She’s a child. A very mild-mannered one, at that.” She smiles wistfully, remembering her own days, scabbing her knees and trying to sneak past her own estate guards. 

“Nevertheless.” Shadowheart is smiling, now- a genuine smile. Soft and alluring, Serena blinks a few times, forgetting to breathe. “I find it… sweet.” 

“Sweet enough that you’d like to join us?” Serena tries. 

“Hah.” Shadowheart laughs, reclining backwards into the bedroll, nestled in the warmth. “ At this hour? I should think not.” 

Serena sighs, and she smiles against Shadowheart’s forehead when she presses a kiss there, apologizing for their bump, earlier. 

Shadowheart tugs her down for a kiss, and Serena moans softly, forgetting herself entirely as she almost melts into Shadowheart. 

Shadowheart pulls away, and laughs quietly at the dumbstruck expression on Serena’s face. 

It will never get old for Shadowheart, watching her lover seem to forget time and space, in favor of her lips instead. 

“Go on, then.” Shadowheart drawls in a whisper. “You made a promise.” 

“Did I?” Serena mumbles, touching her own lips with an awestruck look, and Shadowheart chuckles softly at the sight of her handiwork, before letting her go. 

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Screams of delight fill the air, as Karlach lunges for Yenna, who dives to take cover behind Serena’s legs. 

Their training session has been cut short by the presence of the curious little girl, and Karlach and Serena are, perhaps, the only two in camp who haven’t the heart to deny her anything. 

So they spend their afternoon, the one they should have spent recovering for their next battle, playing like children.

And Shadowheart has spent the better part of her afternoon watching. 

In truth, she’s captivated by several of the sights she sees: the first of which being Serena. 

Serena has a heart of gold: it’s likely the reason she hasn’t abandoned Shadowheart altogether, and furthermore- it’s one of Shadowheart’s favorite qualities of Serena’s. 

Serena has told Shadowheart many a tale from her childhood; she was often at odds with the authority figures in her life, for constantly disobeying the particularly strict set of rules she was to abide by. 

Serena grins as Yenna dives for her arms, now laughing as Karlach plays the role of the villain- frankly, the sweetest villain Shadowheart has ever seen. 

The three of them seem nothing more than a rowdy group of children, rather than a rescued child, and a couple of harrowed soldiers. 

Shadowheart watches from the bench outside her own tent- and though she holds a novel in her hands- a recommendation from Wyll, no less- she can’t seem to read it for the life of her. Every time Serena laughs, melodic and beautiful, Shadowheart looks up at her, and falls in love with her more with each passing second. 

There is a specific, unbridled joy Serena seems to display, in the presence of children. 

Shadowheart had noted it before, several times over on their journey- the first time being with the Tiefling children by the Druid’s Grove. 

Shadowheart hadn’t known then what she knows now- about Serena, herself, any of it. 

But she finds the same persistent warmth, fluttering in her chest at the notion of perhaps involving herself with Serena, in this way. 

“I know that look.” A voice clears their throat behind her and then speaks, nearly startling Shadowheart from her love-addled reverie. 

Shadowheart closes her book, setting it on her lap as she glances up at Jaheira quizzically. 

“...And what look might that be?” Shadowheart humors her with a sigh. 

“You wish to be a mother.” Jaheira does not ask it- perhaps if she had, it might have been slightly less shocking. 

“I…you…sorry?” Shadowheart sputters, in a manner most uncharacteristic for the usually unruffled cleric. Her words carry none of the elegant, biting attitude with which she’s normally able to convey her words. 

Jaheira smirks knowingly. “Don’t worry, Shadowheart. Your secret is safe with me.” She glances over at Serena, who dances around Karlach’s extra-slow “attacks” with Yenna standing atop her boots, movements expertly guided by Serena. 

“...I haven’t a clue what you’re referring to.” Shadowheart sniffs, regaining her composure. 

“Surely you don’t.” Jaheira snorts. “Tell me, how is your novel?” She glances at the cover. “The Wanton Warrior, eh?” 

Shadowheart rolls her eyes. “Riveting.” she grits. 

“Oh? I’ve read it myself.” Jaheira’s eyes narrow. “The Commander is quite the character, is she not?” 

Shadowheart sees the trap before Jaheira even finishes laying it. “Not a real character in the novel, I presume? Fine. I’ve barely read a word. Happy?” 

Jaheira scoffs. “So very bright. I should have known better.” She acknowledges with a little smile. She sobers, glancing at Yenna. “It is not something to carry shame over….wanting children, I mean.” She clarifies. 

Shadowheart’s cheeks burn as a blush slowly breaks out across her features. “It’s not…i don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting children.” She corrects softly. “Just…not me.” She whispers the last part, and Jaheira nods, for a moment. 

“I…thought the same, once.” Jaheira begins. 

Shadowheart knows Jaheira speaks from experience- with at least five foster children in her care at one point, Jaheira has known the trials and tribulations of guardianship. 

“I wouldn’t…” Shadowheart stammers. “I wouldn’t know where to begin.” She says nothing of her struggles in the cloister, of her tainted relationship to Viconia and other figures of authority, or of her fractured relationship with her own parents. 

Until several tendays prior, the notion of Shadowheart ever being a guardian, let alone a mother, to a child, was unthinkable. 

And now? Suddenly there’s a little girl in their camp, and she’s forsaking principles she’s held for the entirety of her life? 

No- that isn’t entirely fair, or truthful. 

Serena is making her rethink everything. 

Shadowheart sees a partner in Serena- a partner she never could have imagined. Serena makes even the most daunting tasks seem achievable. Serena was there with her when she turned her back on Shar, and Serena helped her lead the charge into the cloister to save her parents. 

With Serena…Shadowheart finds that she wouldn’t hate the idea, quite so much as she thought she did. 

And that terrifies her. 

It is the sound of crying that draws Shadowheart’s attention, and she’s up from her seat before she can even make sense of what’s happening. Serena cradles Yenna, scooping her up as if she weighs nothing at all, and she and Karlach coo softly to her. 

It’s when Serena turns towards her that Shadowheart sees it- a scrape, barely there, nothing but a little red mark on the child’s knee. 

“It’s alright.” Serena coos, as she brushes Yenna’s tears away. “I happen to know someone who can make everything better.” She promises sweetly. 

Shadowheart watches the way Serena effortlessly supports Yenna’s weight while distracting her, and realizes with a jolt, Serena is coming to her. 

“Y…you..do?” Yenna sniffles. 

“I do.” Serena promises with a little smile. “I couldn’t live without her.” She tells her so casually, though the words make Shadowheart’s chest ache with fondness. 

Serena nods to Shadowheart’s tent, and Shadowheart gets the message, politely excusing herself from Jaheira’s watch as she guides them back to her tent.  

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

It is remarkable how quickly children stop crying when they’re distracted, Shadowheart notes, with no shortage of amusement. 

Yenna has seated herself comfortably atop Shadowheart’s bedroll- which, to be fair, goes unused nearly every night, since Shadowheart has essentially moved into Serena’s tent. 

Yenna busies herself with touching some of Shadowheart’s belongings curiously- several books, a few plants, whatever she seems to be able to get her hands on. 

And then, of course, comes the lovely, “What’s this?” from her lips, nearly every five seconds. 

Serena watches with amusement as Shadowheart opens her mouth to explain, but is interrupted every time. 

“What’s this?” 

“That’s just a watering can-”

“And this?” 

“That would be one of my fa-” 

“Oh, what’s this?” Yenna asks, holding a book up from the pile. “The Salty-” 

Shadowheart’s eyebrows are in her hairline as she shoots Serena a mortified glance, and Serena gracefully plucks the book from Yenna’s grasp. 

“You’ll want to pay attention to her healing magic.” Serena winks at Yenna, slyly sliding the book beneath the furs, out of sight. 

Her gaze dances with amusement, and Shadowheart offers her a little smile, shaking her head at the narrow miss. 

“Magic?” Yenna repeats, eyes wide with awe. “You can do that?” She asks, and she seems to be seeing Shadowheart in a new light. 

Shadowheart laughs softly, unsure of what to do with the admiration. “Yes. I need you to be still, could you do that for me?” She asks sweetly, and Yenna nods, all too eager. She nearly shoves her knee in Shadowheart’s chin, practically vibrating with excitement. 

Shadowheart exchanges a wide-eyed glance with Serena, who smiles back at her from where she sits beside Yenna, resting her chin atop her knees. 

“Still, Yenna.” Serena reminds with a little chuckle, and Yenna’s bouncing ceases. 

When Shadowheart goes to work, Yenna seems to think she’s met a goddess. She watches, gaping all the while, as Shadowheart’s glowing palm does away with the benign scrape atop her knee, closing the skin until it looks seamless. 

Yenna glances up at her, eyes wider than Serena has ever seen them. 

“...Better?” Shadowheart asks softly, and Yenna throws herself at Shadowheart, hugging her by looping her short arms around Shadowheart’s neck and shoulders. 

“Thank you, thank you!” Yenna cheers, despite the fact that it took almost nothing from Shadowheart. 

Shadowheart stills, stunned into silence for a moment, as the little girl hugs her, thanking her profusely. 

It is Serena’s warm gaze over Yenna’s shoulder that brings her back; Shadowheart realizes she likes this feeling, radiating from her heart to the rest of her body. 

She likes being a healer, a protector,...a parent, even. 

“I…it was nothing.” Shadowheart murmurs, but she does give Yenna a little hug in return, and that seems to quell the child’s need for affection. 

“...Can I go back to playing with Karlach?” Yenna turns to ask them both. 

It is a strange feeling, Shadowheart realizes- she and Serena seem to share custody of Yenna, for all intents and purposes. Of course, Shadowheart operates under no delusion of making this permanent; Yenna’s mother needs their help. 

But the fact that she doesn’t seem to mind, is what suddenly takes her breath away. 

Serena nods, and Yenna excuses herself with a last, grateful show of appreciation before practically skipping away. 

Serena glances back to her lover, eyeing her carefully, drinking her expression in. 

She looks as if she wants to say something, and for Shadowheart’s sake, she bites her tongue, knowing all-too-well how intense her feelings can be for Shadowheart. 

“Thank you.” Serena offers quietly, instead. 

Her eyes give her away; they’re nearly wet with emotion. Shadowheart recognizes it instantly; it’s the same awe Yenna had in her eyes when Shadowheart healed her, only…

Love.

Serena’s gaze is thick with adoration. 

“It was no trouble.” Shadowheart reminds her gently. 

“...You don’t know how good you are.” Serena whispers, and the way she says it- the tears that gather in her eyes- tell Shadowheart how she means it. “We are all so lucky- me, more than anyone, to have you…” 

Serena is incredibly gifted at making Shadowheart ache in the most beautiful ways. 

Shadowheart knows what’s left unspoken- knows the implications of Serena’s words. 

They could have a family together, if they survive this. 

“I am the lucky one.” Shadowheart promises in just a whisper as she gently pushes Serena backwards onto the bedroll, climbing atop her. 

Serena hisses as her back meets the furs, and Shadowheart freezes, eyes wide with concern. 

“You’re hurt?” Shadowheart demands, already reaching to undo Serena’s shirt to get a better look. 

“Mmm.” Serena groans in response, and pulls the copy of the Salty Mermaid from underneath the furs, the hard corner of the book having dug into Serena’s hip. 

Shadowheart snorts a laugh, shoulders dropping in relief, and Serena grins, gently tossing the book aside. “Too close, that.” 

Perhaps, Shadowheart muses, in the future, they’ll invest in a library for their home with a locked section. 

Or at least a section that’s out of reach of most children, anyway. 

This time, Shadowheart remembers to properly seal the tent flaps. 

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Dusk paints the camp in lovely hues of pink and orange, and then eventually red, as the sun’s rays begin to filter out of the sky, one by one. 

In the heart of camp, there is a bustle around the fire, where a particularly talked about stew is finally being served to all. 

“Is it good?” Yenna asks hopefully, as she offers Arnell yet another helping of stew. “I tried really really hard! And Grub says it’s my best stew yet!” 

“I have no reason to believe otherwise.” Arnell nods sagely as he holds his bowl up in celebration. “Truly a delicacy.” He smiles kindly at the little girl as she moves onto the next recipient around the fire, bowls at the ready. 

Shadowheart has to give Yenna credit; it is a delicious stew. 

When Serena had returned from the city traders with Yenna, carrying a whole surplus of produce, Shadowheart was more than amused. 

It seems that Serena’s investments have paid dividends, now, as everyone gathers to enjoy the meal. 

“Delicious.” Emmeline chuckles, after a bite. “Of course Jen’s daughter can cook. She comes from me, after all.” 

Shadowheart stills, mid-bite, as she exchanges a wide-eyed glance with her father. 

Arnell winces slightly; it’s never easy, hearing Emmeline flit in and out of the reality her mind seems to create for itself in its atrophy. 

She has better days, mostly, but every now and again she’ll make a comment that reminds Shadowheart she’s not all there. 

Only this time, she’s managed to say just the thing that’s terrified Shadowheart all week. 

Shadowheart opens her mouth to correct her, and thinks better of it. Within a few moments, her mother will have forgotten she’s said anything at all. 

Best not to further confuse her by trying to set the record straight. 

Still, the words linger in Shadowheart’s mind.

Jen’s daughter. 

Shadowheart glances at Serena, who helps Yenna serve, knowing all too well the little girl’s tendency to spill- and wanting to prevent as much with something as scalding as stew. 

Shadowheart feels the all-too-familiar butterflies in her chest, just glancing at her. 

It hasn’t been an easy tenday- and that’s not even considering the fighting they’ve done to get into the city. In fact, it hasn’t been an easy journey, in totality. 

Shadowheart cannot deny the truth any longer; she’s changing. As the life she thought she’d lead bleeds away into the past, she finds her sights set firmly on the future; on one individual in particular. 

When Serena finally manages to get Yenna seated with her own bowl of food- as intent as she is on serving others- Shadowheart beckons her away from the group with a little nod of her head. 

Shadowheart’s very heart constricts when Serena follows instantly, without a glance behind her. 

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------

“This is actually quite good.” Serena notes after a spoon of the stew, legs dangling over the slight cliff-face she and Shadowheart sit atop. 

Although there’s no waterfall this time, and no vintage bottle of wine to be shared as they did on their first evening together in solitude, it is equally as romantic. 

Shadowheart glances at her in amusement, stealing a piece of bread from the corner of Serena’s bowl. “You had doubts?” She asks curiously, popping the bread into her mouth delicately. 

“Could you cook a stew at Yenna’s age?” Serena scoffs. “In truth, I had my concerns that she’d burn the camp down.” 

“And yet, you took her to get ingredients.” Shadowheart notes, smiling but politely declining when Serena offers the rest of her food, earnestly. 

“It made her happy.” Serena explains. “She misses her mother, Heart.” 

Shadowheart frowns at the reminder. “I know…” She murmurs, glancing down past the smoke billowing from atop the campfire, to her own mother and father. 

They seem to be amused by the presence of the child, and they entertain her with stories as they eat around the fire. A safe distance away, Shadowheart is safe to peer at them without fear of being caught. 

Serena follows her gaze, and frowns, slightly. “What’s the matter?” 

She reads Shadowheart easily; like the way Shadowheart devours one of Wyll’s book recommendations. 

“Honestly?” Shadowheart laughs, a little sadly. “...I don’t know.” 

Serena nods slowly, giving Shadowheart a chance to elaborate. If there’s one talent Serena possesses, it is to listen without judgement. Shadowheart has always secretly envied her, in this regard. 

The moment passes, and Shadowheart finds the will to continue. 

“I…Yenna’s presence in camp…I think it…brought to surface some feelings that I’ve buried deep within me.” She admits, slowly. 

Serena tries to follow her logic. “Does Yenna’s presence here make you uncomfortable?” She asks, again, without judgement. 

Shadowheart wants to laugh. Only Serena would try to play the knight-in-shining-armor between her and a child, if Shadowheart asked it of her. 

“Gods, no.” Shadowheart scoffs and whispers, shaking her head. “It’s not her.” She clarifies, gently. “It’s me.” She adds, a little sadly. 

Serena sets her bowl aside, taking Shadowheart’s chin between her thumb and forefinger, gently tilting her downcast gaze upwards. 

Shadowheart breathes raggedly, but she meets Serena’s gaze, inquisitive and ever so loving, in the moon’s light. 

The moondrop pendant around Shadowheart’s neck, gifted to her by Serena herself, pulses with light as Shadowheart’s heart hammers against her ribcage. 

“I think…” Shadowheart inhales sharply, gathers herself, and tries again. “...I want…to be a mother someday. To your child.” 

The words come out of Shadowheart before she can stop herself. 

In fact- it’s not what she meant to discuss- she’d intended to tell Serena about her mother’s verbal mishap, about what led up to this sudden outpouring of emotion- but she says the first thing that comes to her mind. 

The truth, in essence. 

Shadowheart doesn’t know what she was expecting. 

Serena smiles. 

It’s one of her rare, extra-elated smiles- the very kind that renders Shadowheart unable to breathe, when she sees it. 

There is no shock, no questioning her logic, her qualifications. Serena does not ask her why she thinks she’s fit to be a mother, or if life in the cloister damaged her irreparably. 

No, Serena simply cries tears of joy, and cradles her face as if it’s the most precious possession she’s ever held, fragile and liable to break at any moment. 

Shadowheart can feel her lover’s happiness, in waves. 

She had no idea Serena felt so strongly about the idea at all; she really needs to be more vocal about her concerns, her fears; so many of them are unfounded. 

“...Once we win this…and we will win….” Shadowheart continues, kissing away the tears on Serena’s high cheekbones. “...There’ll be time to think about all of this, I know…” Shadowheart explains. “But I…this last tenday…I realized I didn’t hate the idea of becoming a mother…” Shadowheart whispers. “I…hated the idea that I’d fail.” 

Shadowheart knows how outlandish it is to even consider such a possibility with so much on their collective plate, but the truth is, she’s new to the idea. 

Under Shar, Shadowheart had long accepted that her fate was to serve, and that she’d never have a family of her own, outside of the cloister. 

The idea that she can, now…it’s so terrifyingly freeing.

And it’s not as if Shadowheart needs a child right this instant, but just to be able to consider the possibility…it’s a privilege. 

“You won’t fail.” Serena promises solemnly. 

“You sound so certain.” Shadowheart challenges sadly. 

“You could never fail.” Serena promises again, so tenderly and passionately that Shadowheart has no choice but to heed her words. “Shadowheart, Shar couldn’t even make you bad.” Serena laughs when she says it, almost to the point of hysteria, but Shadowheart knows she’s speaking from the heart. 

“That’s not-” 

“It is.” Serena presses. “Shar, Viconia, no one could take the heart out of Shadowheart.” Serena strokes her cheek softly, and Shadowheart shivers as she leans closer into her touch, so desperate to become one with her. “I know you think there’s bad in you, Shadowheart, but there simply isn’t…” Serena whispers in awe, in complete admiration of the woman before her. “And we learn from what hurts us the most. You could never do that to your own child…”

“They way you say it, it’s hard not to believe…” Shadowheart sniffles, and Serena wraps her arms around her, holding her close. 

Shadowheart comes to rest her chin on Serena’s shoulder, and she sighs, burying herself deep into her lover’s warm embrace. 

“I’m a terrible liar, you’d know.” Serena offers, and she grins when Shadowheart snickers a messy laugh into her shoulder. 

A kiss is pressed to Shadowheart’s head, and she sighs. 

“I adore you.” Serena admits quietly. “I only want what makes you happy. Child or no child, Shadowheart, I only ever need you.” 

Shadowheart glances up at her, gaze glassy with fresh unshed tears, moved to pieces by the tenderness with which Serena treats her. 

She opens her mouth to respond, but it’s a child’s voice that cuts through the silence first, bouncing up the cliff face and echoing across camp. 

“Tav! Do you want more- Oh! There you two are!” Yenna bounds over eagerly, nearly tripping over herself as hot stew tumbles out of the bowls and right into Tav’s lap, thanks to her quick timing, gently shoving Shadowheart out of the way. 

“...Oops!” Yenna covers her mouth, and then laughs out loud. “It’s still good, I promise!” She gestures to the two (now largely empty) bowls, and grins rather proudly. “I have to go give some to Gale. Bye!” She skips away, drawing the attention of both Grub and Scratch, causing quite the cacophony as she leaves. 

Shadowheart glances down at Serena’s lap, and then winces, giving her a look of utter sympathy. 

“...Perhaps it’s best if we wait a while, yet.” Shadowheart muses aloud. “…to have a child, I mean.” 

Serena winces in agreement, biting her lip to keep from crying out in pain. 

[quixoticanarchy]

all emails are not created equal “RENT DUE” is among the most odious and will never ever find me well. or if I am well when it finds me it will make sure that doesn’t last

[theartsyphantom]

☆PINNED POST TIME☆

(we're just gonna ignore that this took me like 4 months to do 😃👍)

Sexuality: Oriented Aroace, Asexual, Greyromantic, Lesboy, Queer Platonic, ect

Gender: Non Binary, Demifluid(? or some multi gender identity), Transmasc, Stargender, maybe other xenogenders? (im not sure what ones yet)

Pronouns: they/he/star/crow/th☆y/il/iel/any other ones I may end up using (please ask) (I'm still learning about xenogenders and stuff)

Names: Ezzie (preferred name), Ezrael (long for Ezzie, pronounced Ez-reeul), Ez (moots only)

Interests: Good Omens, Scott Pilgrim vs the World, Heartstopper, The Mitchells vs the Machines, Stranger Things

Hobbies: Drawing, Piano, Band, Music in general, Graphic Design, making Kandi/friendship bracelets (not the type where you make the knots and it makes some pattern bc I can barely even tie my shoes), Curling, Swimming, Skating, procrastination, and more

Music: Chase Petra, Rabbitology, Yaelokre, Tally Hall, The Linda Lindas, Ricky Montgomery, Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Flawed Mangoes, Marina and The Diamonds, Ghost and Pals, Kacey Musgraves, Bo Burnham, TV Girl, Cigarettes After Sex, whatsaheart, Ghost, The Neighborhood, Taylor Swift, Mitski, Chappell Roan, Franz Ferdinand, Evanescence

Also music but (ik) the artist is problematic: Mr Kitty (but don't listen to his music in a way that directly supports him he touches kids and he's a groomer 🤮🤮 I'd recommend unofficial lyric vids if those even exist I literally dropped listening to anything of his after I found out so idk) (also my fave by him is glow but it is very obviously about committing suicide so be warned about that)

DNI: Homophobics, Racists, Sexists, anyone with THAT kind of 18+ account, non minors, Trump Supporters, Pedophiles, Ableists, Pro Life, Flat-Earthers, Zoophiles, Pro Israel, Fatphobics (im fat irl so if you have a problem with that then leave), and anyone else listed as DNI in my caption <3

Personality type: INFP-T

Likes: Pasta, the smell of rain, snow, walking in the rain, my friends, my best friends, my girlfriend, chemistry, science in general, music, maths, French, piano, daydreaming, sleeping in, warm blankets, cinnamon rolls, bread, patterned socks, doc Martin's, combat boots, thrifting, chunky jewelry, learning new things, seeing new places, band, falling in love platonically with my friends, the smell of wood smoke, earth tones, sage green, sunsets, rainy days in the middle of summer, a warm breeze

Dislikes: big crowds, being around large groups of people for too long, disassociating, derealization, global warming, climate change, closed minded people, catcalling, the texture of meat, any remotely gelatinous texture, the sound and feel and gritting/scratching, itchy tags in clothes, people who are mean just because, bullying, people who say slurs and shrug it off by saying "but I have a pass", creeps, the smell of cigarettes, fluorescent lights

Other: diagnosed ADHD, Anxiety, some childhood trauma, probably Depression, C-PTSD, OCD, and maybe autism(?), certified weird kid, bilingual (English and French), I question my identity literally every five seconds and it keeps getting more and more complex, I also hate myself but like that's kind of a downer, burned out gifted kid syndrome, "responsible role model" oldest child syndrome, and probably more that I'm forgetting

I'll try and edit it if/when anything changes or if I forgot something (im sure I did) :3

Love you all <3333 The☆Artsy☆Phantom

[heraldeez]

Because it’s funny and very off-season, would you be comfortable writing about Jayce doing some Christmas decorating?

(I laughed a lot writing this one, thanks for the prompt, anon.)

Jayce x Reader | 670 | SFW

Contains: mistletoe! and the hubris of man

You’re chewing on an excellent snickerdoodle cookie and waiting for the ‘snap.’

The tiny pine tree you’d brought home to stuff into the corner of your shoebox grad-student apartment couldn’t be more than three feet tall, set on a table to add a bit of winter cheer to the sea of textbooks and beat up mechanical projects that usually comprised your place. And despite its diminutive size, Jayce has spent the last five minutes strapping on a distinctly oversized tree topper to the poor thing.

It’ll totally work, or so he had said. Handmade. Just for you.

Not like you were going to tell him no, even before he had held the ornament aloft so giddily, absolutely gleaming with earnestness and excitement…

Jayce stands at the center of your living room, surrounded by cheery garlands and two tacked up stockings, staring down your tree with a contemplative hand on his chin, as though there were simply a better angle he could come at it from. The branch woefully strapped with the dense, albeit beautiful, piece of metalwork droops down towards him as if prostrate and begging for mercy.

“I just thought–” Jayce closes his mouth again for a moment, regarding the poor tree with a grimace. “I thought the wood might be a bit stronger?”

You blink at the topper – solid metal! The size of your cranium! In no universe was that thing meant for a tree smaller than the towering one in the festival market square! – and swallow back cinnamon sugar.

“Well, the ornament is just, uh, extremely well made,” you offer, gently.

Snap.

Shouldn’t have opened your mouth. The tree takes the opportunity to splinter, topper lurching abruptly into the floor at his feet with a dull thunk.

Jayce sucks in air through his teeth. “I owe you a new tree. And maybe a new floor.”

That startles a bark of laughter from you, standing up from the kitchen stool to go place a gentle hand on his shoulder, surveying the carnage. “Definitely not. We’ll just get more creative with displaying it.” Your eyes dart around your cramped living room for prospective spots. “I think it would look excellent on top of the bookshelf. Flanked with some candles.”

Jayce nods slowly, but his pout is still focused on the splintered bough. His brows still furrowed with the need to fix, to problem solve. 

“Before that,” you ply, drawing your hand from his shoulder to rummage in a festive bag beneath the coffee table, “would you like to help me tack these up instead?”

Jayce's eyes flick to the bundle of mistletoe sprigs dangling from your fingers. The frown startles off his face as his lips part slightly, wanting. 

“Oh! Well, yeah–” The corners of his lips quirk up, somewhat bashful, somewhat delighted. “Yeah, I can definitely help with that.”

The tree is all but forgotten in the subsequent flurry of kisses. One right there in the living room. One out on your tiny balcony, breathing in the scent of candied fruits and nuts wafting across your neighborhood from the festival market up the street. Another in the doorway of your kitchen. Approximately twelve exchanged in the middle of your bedroom, Jayce's fingers curling in the soft yarn of your sweater to haul you up against him, eager and sweet against your lips.

He lurches back sharply enough to make you jump, snapping his fingers. “I've got it – I'll build you a new tree. You don't mind the brass aesthetic, do you? It'll be very art deco.”

The abruptness of it startles laughter out of you, too caught in your mirth to remind him that Christmas is in four days, and he hardly has the time to spare building you some sort of steampunk tree.

And yet the tree appears, nestled in the crook of Jayce's elbow when he knocks on your door Christmas Eve, tiny and sturdy and gleaming in the light.

You marvel at it for a moment, and then pull him down for a much-deserved kiss.