#(At least that's how a lot of white cis people are about trans people. But I've seen people learn their way around the fear with help🤷‍♀️)

[luna-is-out-there]

As far as I know, the trans lady currently in charge of my local trans support group is a person of color. (She's awesome and beautiful and I'm so proud of her and glad that the old folks there chose her to take over🙏)

There are so many more people in our community than the two or three in the now very fucking old Stonewall fables.

saying this for my non black queer followers but: black queer folk have always existed, we've always been around, especially when it came to defending and fighting for our communities rights.

it sucks to see us never included in queer centered art or post, but we exist.

[so-i-did-this-thing]

You mentioned how certain hobbies tend to draw a fashy crowd. I’m a trans poc and damn there are things I want to try like historical European martial arts but some of the vibes are rancid blood and soil fash (not all but definitely some). Do you have any recommendations on how to engage with interests and hobbies that appeal to unsavory crowds while not letting it kills your enthusiasm or participation?

To give cis folks some background on what it's like for me to be trans in a new fandom or hobby:

I poke around old posts and profiles. I find myself looking for dogwhistles.

Things like: What research (or "research") does everyone cite? What sort of reference photos does a white man use when he wants an 1940s "military" style haircut? How does a frock flicks person respond to colorblind casting in a new TV show? How do historic videogame nerds respond to a queer character? A queer romance? How does someone define "historic accuracy?" What is a re-enactment group's policy on "gendered" roles that need playing?

And above all, which voices are getting amplified throughout all this?

I especially look to forum admins and group leaders. I notice when POC and trans people feel safe to post selfies and other contributions. I notice what comments people make on these. And I absolutely notice when a group leader makes a callout post about fashy stuff. (My vintage menswear group does this frequently, god bless.)

I hate that it takes a lot of social and academic familiarity to decide if you want to invest your time in a hobby or with a certain group. It sucks a lot of the joy out of being a newbie and learning the ropes. It can feel very isolating to have to teach yourself so much just so you feel safe to make introductions.

Sometimes, I just barge in and let the trash take itself out. Like clockwork, every time I get into a new fandom or some cosplay content of mine goes viral, I double down on my trans posts. It's a litmus test, but also a beacon to other trans folks and our allies.

I bring all this up because the burden shouldn't be on us -- I hope that white and cishet allies in these spaces can see the mental calculus a lot of us have to do. (And god, I am white and male and thus only experiencing a fraction of this nonsense.) And that the best way to help share the load and be welcoming is to be visually and loudly vigilant against your hobby space becoming a Nazi bar.

But you're right -- it can suck out a lot of joy. I suppose my recommendation is, once you find at least some of your people, they can help you widen the net. Not necessarily just wrt meeting other cool folks, but also springboarding into other interests, should your current one sour.

And if this doesn't work, enjoy your passions out of spite. I am a VERY obstinate man sometimes and I've developed an "I dare you" attitude to those who'd try to push me away from what I like. You will find some of your people this way, too, and there is a comfort and safety from being just with them -- just try not to bond solely on bitterness.

I wish I could give specific recommendations based on your interests, and if folks have their own advice, the notes are all yours.

[xelqua-empire]

Since everyone else is putting out their opinions on the Skizz situation, I might as well join in.

So my general opinion is that if it wasn't for the mods, what he said on stream wouldn't be that huge of a deal. Disappointing, sure, but probably just a split-second decision where he chose the wrong option, probably drawing on a lack of understanding of marginalized communities and what it means to have your existence and rights politicized. He's a middle aged, cis, straight, white man in a country where trans rights have, indeed, become a hot political topic. I could see where he could be coming from there, although I still wouldn't be too impressed with his reaction. He could have genuinely seen it as just another political statement, and not wanted to get into that on stream.

However, that explanation falls apart when you consider the mods. He has at least two people in his community that are outspoken in their bigotry, and that he likes and trusts enough to give control over his community to them. These are people who he knows are transphobic, and he's protecting their feelings over the safety of the trans people in his community. That wasn't someone avoiding being political, that was someone intentionally prioritizing and placating transphobes.

So yeah, I'm pretty disappointed. Idk if I'll stop watching him completely but I probably won't watch his videos for a while, if only because I probably can't enjoy them now the same way I could before. I don't think he's an awful person. I just think he honestly doesn't understand how transphobia affects people, and doesn't realize how much a big deal this is. Honestly, when I think about the situation, I see a sheltered, privileged person prioritizing the comfort of himself and those close to him without realizing the consequences because that's what he's used to. And yeah, that's still pretty disappointing.

I hope he listens to his fans. I hope the other hermits, both those in the queer community and allies, talk to him and explain to him the message he's just sent, both to the trans people and transphobes that watch him. I hope he listens, learns, and understands, and I hope he makes some significant changes, including a better apology and a change in his mod team. I know that's a lot, but honestly, I don't think it's too much to expect. If you want your community to be a safe space, start by taking the danger out from the top.

That was a bit of a stream of consciousness ramble and idk if it made any sense but that's how I'm feeling right now: disappointed and conflicted. I want to believe he'll put in the work to do better but idk if that'll happen. Uhhh idk how to conclude this so

The end.

[drdemonprince]

Hi Devon !

I just listened to your newest YouTube reading of your Substack and it made me realize that I have a different understanding than you of Sizhen’s gender framework, or perhaps am still developing my understanding of it.

You describe yourself in the piece as, through failing to join the Power gender, a Faggot-Subaltern. Other writings of yours describe experiencing some social privilege of having been perceived as masculine, and we both agree that our transmisogyny-exempt status renders us by average safer than our TMA siblings. In my understanding of Sizhen’s framework, this would render you closer to the Not-Power gender category, making transition something of a lateral move: away from Some misogyny but towards transphobia. Or, rather, in different gender categories depending on the power systems that be: given some power in comparison to TMA folks, recognized socially at times as an ally to other Not-Power folks against the subaltern of the transfem, but an otherwise marginalized category that is used as a threat to those within the cisgender hierarchy. Perhaps this perspective of conditionality is not the purpose of the framework; I’d like to hear what you think.

This also made me think about other scenarios where marginalized gendered folks engage in respectability politics - transmeds, transandrobros, and the like. Would you describe them as claiming Not-Power status against a Faggot-Subaltern for profit, safety, and success? Or is their ultimate failure in doing so a sign that they are in fact Faggot-Subaltern?

Thanks for reading !

I would say that the 'Not-Power' category is, predominately in our society, the category that cis women are relegated to and enjoy certain privileges within, and my trans masculinity doesn't slot me into that category so much as expel me from it. I was in not-Power when I was moving through the world as more or less a cishet woman. As a man, I'm theoretically aligning myself with the Power category, and my masculine qualities often afford me a lot of the privileges that come with being in the Power category, at least relative to those around me (I have always worked in fields filled with women, queer people, and men of color, and so I can access the privileges of white manhood relative to them). However, I'm also someone people yell "faggot" at on the street who cannot pass as a straight man for more than a thirty second interaction. And it's abundantly clear in how other men and cis women relate to me that I'm faggotized, as the sizhen system post talks about. If you're in the faggot subaltern, you pretty well know it, and I know it immediately in the way other men physically relate to me. It's a mix of condescending feminization, dehumanization, and imparsability that's very distinct. (it's hot as fuck when it's some big burly masc guy throwing my over his shoulder and dragging me home at the gay bar, and even kind of cute when it's a straight man in line at the walgreens smelling my hair, but not so cute when i'm alone on a train platform at night and a crowd of drunk Cubs fans is approaching.)

I am notably LESS safe in a lot of straight spaces now than i ever was as a cis woman, because I'm not in Not-Power, I'm in Faggot Subaltern, and everybody can see it a mile away. I stand out as not belonging and not following the rules of either pre-determined gender category ("powerful" men and 'not-powerful" women) and there is a looming threat that comes with this, and that's what defines being in the faggot subaltern. as you can see i dont see this stuff as fully categorical, but rather contextual. depending on the situation i have both privilege and a lot of vulnerability, and that's true of a lot of feminine gay men.

[txttletale]

Obligatory "in good faith" premise.

I've seen an argument against tme/tma that focuses on the fact that there's no similar terms for other types of oppression (as in, no terms like "racism affected/exempt"), and how tme/tma aren't good terms because they imply there's people who can't be affected at all by transmisogyny, regardless of whether it would be "misdirected" or not (which I do think it would be, although a lot of people against tme/tma would disagree).

Since tma/tme functionally ends up meaning just "transfem" and "not transfem" (or at least that's how ive seen it used and advocated for), do you think there's something to the idea that we could just say that instead when discussing transmisogyny? Or is there something about these specific terms that adds to the conversation?

I mean, I guess it would be awkward to put "not transfem" in your bio maybe

i mean like. there are those terms, though, those terms dfo exist, they're jsut called 'poc' and 'white'. liike the construction of 'whiteness' is such that it basically literally means 'racism exempt' within the context of white supremacy (which is ofc the context in which most discussion of racism takes place).

i feel like people are really getting caught up on like, 'exempt' and 'affected' as like, total absolutes 100% of the time and bringing up edge cases as though this absolutely refutes them when i think that's not a particularly useful thing to do for what are fundamentally abstractions for discussing a particular set of nuanced and diverse relations to transmisogyny! like obviously every single person has a unique and specific relationship to transmisogyny, but that doesn't make the terms useless an ymore than 'gay' or 'trans' are useless because people have complicated sexuality or gender situations.

& i think that if we started saying 'transfem / not transfem' then all the exact same edge cases and arguments would just start shifting onto the definition of the word 'transfem'. which i don't think is synonymous with TMA. i think that e.g. arguing that drag queens who regularly have their lives threatened by nazi militiamen with guns are not Transmisogyny Affected is kind of sillygoofy, right, but a lot of them don't identify as transfem! & i think moreover that saying 'trans women' and 'non trans women' kind of is the exact same maneuver as people who say 'don't say cis' because like the implicit content of using those constructions is that there are 'default' people who need no descritpor and then there are 'transfems', right?

+ i think TME/TMA are valuable because they articulate exactly what's relevant about the distinction, which is a relationship to transmisogyny. like a trans guy isnt 'TME' because he's a trans guy, but because if he gets into an argument with me he can pull out the classic 'aggressive' 'scary' 'creepy' 'predatory' 'sexual deviant' cards and try to have me socially murdered and have people side with him by default, something he shares with a cis guy and a cis girl in the exact same situaiton. because of the Trans Misogyny that i am Affected by and he is Exempt From and that therefore can be weaopnized against me in any interaction.

[catboybiologist]

do you have any advice for arguing with people who are only passively transphobic?

in a conversation about trans rights they compared trans people to people changing their race and im not experienced enough to actually put into words why that’s wrong

-a cis dude

I've had this one sitting in my inbox a bit, but my thoughts drifted back to it.

First off, this is not "passive" transphobia. This is active transphobia. If they've heard or are using an argument like that, it means they've spent at least some time evaluating their views about trans people, and actively chose to use that argument.

Second off, with that in mind, realize that they are not arguing in good faith. You won't convince them. Not in a couple minutes of conversation, not with a snappy retort. I have a deep nuanced answer to this. I usually don't bother arguing this point, but I do argue about "biologically female" a lot, and in my experience, they don't want to hear any nuanced argument. In fact, they think nuance is a point against you. If it can't be explained "simply", then it's no longer "common sense" and they don't care.

So. Yeah. In general, it's best to assess whether you even should engage in the first place, before you engage.

That said, what is the nuanced argument?

Full disclosure on my perspective, I'm a white, American trans woman, have lived in the US my whole life. I have some immigrant family and friends from various backgrounds. I'm just explaining my perspective here, since there's many nuances that I wont be the best person to talk about, so I welcome correction and additional perspective.

Two things to say here.

First, a spicy take, apparently: I think you can be trans racial. Just, not in the way that people like to think.

Race, like so-called "biological sex", is a set of artificially constructed categories formed from a random collection of physical traits. Which physical traits are chosen as "racial", as well as which traits belong to which race, is dependent on the society you're living in. As culture changes, or as an individual moves through different cultures, there race will often change, making them, in a sense, "trans racial".

Immigrant culture is probably the clearest example of this. I'll use my family history. It's a limited perspective, but I don't want to speak to other people's experiences.

My heritage is from a region of Europe that would probably start shit in my notes just by mentioning it. Racial differences for my family have been perceived based on MUCH different criteria than they have been stateside. Wars and genocides have been enacted over that perception. Those racial categories are "real", not in the sense that they represent innate biological differences, but that they have real effects on how someone navigates through a particular society. If my family had not immigrated, I would be considered a different "race" than people of nearby countries, or within that same country.

And yet. All of that is gone for me. My racial experience is that of a white american. I don't even have an accent. I can keep in touch with my heritage, and I try to, but my "race" as it affects my position in american society, is fully that of a white american. Since I'm born here, it's always been that way. Everyone who would be considered a different race back where my family is from, would probably all be considered white (or "ambiguous" in some cases) here.

Already, this contrasts with immigrant experiences even within my family- treatment dramatically changes depending on where you are, and how much you "assimilate".

I'm only using my background as an example because I don't want to speak for anyone else's experience. No, I'm not saying I'm "trans racial" because someone in my family is an immigrant, I'm just trying to provide a framework from my experience. It's a limited perspective, because my appearance is white. But there are many, MANY other examples. Take someone from India: a massive, consolidated subcontinent with hundreds of thousands of ethnic and cultural distinctions... That are all treated much, much differently when you move that to a different country.

"But Sierra," I hear you say, "this analogy really breaks down when making one to one comparisons. Are you really saying that being something, like a particular race or gender, is solely a function of how society treats you? How does this support transgender identities? Like, someone can't just 'become' black or whatever. I get what you said earlier, but there's still a limited scope of how someone can 'transition' between races in that framework."

An excellent point, which brings me to the next point. Disclaimer, it's kind of stolen from Contrapoints.

Both race and gender are societal frameworks based on pieces of information about an individual, either sex characteristics/presentation, or arbitrary "ethnic" traits.

The difference between these two, however, is who has experience with them. Ethnic groups are, by definition, groups of people with familial lineages and culture shared between them.

Masculinity and femininity, however, are shared experiences for all of humankind. A white person will never have the lifelong experience of being treated as a black person. However, every human being, even cisgender people, are exposed to the enforcement of gender, sex characteristics different than their own, and the policing of those categories. Every single person on this planet has varying degrees of "male" and "female", "man" and "woman", and everything that is neither or both, and has been treated accordingly at different points in their life. The same is not necessarily true about race. Even though biologically, racial differences are essentially nothing (humans are actually a very genetically bottlenecked species), society picks out it's treatment of what it determines to be race, and those experiences become isolated.

Again. These are my thoughts as a white person. If this is trivializing, or poorly represents something, or if I should be corrected, PLEASE let me know. It is, however, an interesting topic.

But crucially, as I mentioned earlier, it's a nuanced topic. And a nuanced answer will get you nowhere with someone arguing in bad faith.

[ghostboyravenight]

what do you mean shingami eyes is run by radfems btw? there's so many trans creators marked as pro-trans, esp transfems. and known predators/MAPs in the trans community are also marked as pro-trans. radfems are anti predator/MAP in their core tenants. i have a big issue with TERFs btw, but i think it's harmful to use radfem as a synonym for "transphobic person" or "transphobic woman". you need to believe in the non-transphobic aspects of radfem (abolish male supremacy, anti fgm, etc etc) because there are many women who don't like sexism and are transphobic but aren't radfem/TERF. it waters down the meaning of feminism for everyone. i'm really sorry about your mom though. that's evil what she said. that's not what a real feminist should ever think, TERF or not. cis women can be born with bottom growth too :(

The thing with the term “radfem” is that it has always aligned itself with TERF ideology. I’m sure there are feminists out there attempting to reclaim it into something different, but the foundations of radfeminism is built on the exclusionary politics of TERF ideology, and always will be no matter how much anyone tries to clean it up and repackage it as something else.

A few years ago, radfems and TERFs were making it no secret that they were the same people, but with the growing animosity towards the term TERF, they settled for “radfem” to hide their true, anti-trans motives and thus claimed that TERF was a slur (despite them being the ones who originally coined the term).

I don’t believe you can separate radfeminism from TERFism, because TERFs sure as hell haven’t, and the two ideologies work under the same belief system. Their exclusionary nature was born from decades of feminist separatism, beginning with the segregation of black and white suffragettes in the 1900s, then the exclusion of lesbians in the 70s, and finally at trans people today. It is an inherently racist, homophobic and transphobic ideology, and even if someone has tried to turn it into “trans-inclusive” I would not feel in the least bit safe around someone who still hangs around and sympathises with the most virulently racist and anti-trans TERFs.

With all that being said, if we’re referring to transradfeminists specifically, the majority of them are still exclusionary of trans men (particularly TMOC), non-binary people and intersex people, because again: radfeminism is an inherently exclusionary ideology that does not allow intersectional feminism within its framework.

This is what I mean when I say Shinigami Eyes is run by radfems, because blogs by trans men/mascs, non-binary people and intersex people are being disproportionately targeted just for speaking about our oppressions, while accounts that say truly egregious stuff about us are still marked trans-friendly:

Anyone excluding us from their so-called feminist activism is a radfem, and trans people aren’t safe around them. A lot of accounts marked green haven’t even been trans people, and have instead been cisgendered radfems using this extension to cause divides in the first place. TERFs are using Shingami Eyes to their own advantage by mass marking trans blogs as red in order to isolate them from their own community, and Shinigami Eyes is doing very little about this.

The point is, Shinigami Eyes is not reliable in the slightest. People need to start making their own decisions on what blogs to follow, because unquestionably trusting an extension that can easily be abused by TERFs, radfems and transradfems (or cis people masquerading as transradfems because that is also a strong possibility; TERFs will create blogs pretending to be a trans person in order to make them look bad to the rest of the community and sow the seeds of dissent) is going to lead to echo chambers being formed amongst transphobic blogs while blogs who try to talk about their experiences and oppressions, or who are simply focused on trans liberation rather than petty infighting, are being isolated from their own community.

Also, in response to you saying we can believe in the feminist beliefs of radfeminism without the transphobia, you’re right! That is called intersectional feminism, and it is the ideology I subscribe to. Radfeminism is an exclusionary subset of feminism, and transphobia is deeply rooted in its politics regardless of individual radfems trying to be trans-inclusive. Intersectional feminism instead focuses on intersecting identities and how those shape a person’s experiences with oppression under a cispatriarchal society. Funnily enough, radfems do not seem to want to let go of their radfem label in exchange for a better, more inclusive form of feminism, which is why I struggle to not assume that the majority of them still hold the same transphobic and racist ideas as their more vocal counterparts, even if they pretend otherwise.

[genderkoolaid]

have you seen the new feature from lyft, where female/nonbinary users can request female/nonbinary drivers? i was just wondering what your thoughts are?

personally a lot of the people i see upset about it are upset for the wrong reasons, its a lot of "creepy cis men will exploit this" which doesnt address the actual issues

in the replies to one of the posts there was an amab black nonbinary person saying they felt the least safe with white women drivers, who in their experience were most racist towards them, a lot of the replies to their comment were "this isnt about you, this is about protecting women/nonbinaries", "youre a cis man, you dont understand how difficult it is to be a woman" and things along those lines

personally i dont think this is going to make a difference, most actual minority groups will still be just as unsafe, all it seems to have done is create more hostility towards men/masculine presenting/otherwise oppressed people for not liking this new feature

Link for those curious

I mean I get the motivation here (making people feel safer), but for one making this only available to "women and nonbinary people" once again fucks over trans men. Like if a trans man wants to use this feature to feel safer, it seems like he'd have to misgender himself on the app. And if he seems like a cis man to the rider, is he going to be accused of being a predator taking advantage of the program? Would he be accused of that even if they know he's trans because he's a man?

And of course that last point also goes for anyone who might be read as being a cis man or too close to a cis man for the rider's comfort; trans women, nonbinary people assigned male, nonbinary people assigned female on T, intersex people with high T, etc etc. And that also applies to the rider- this could cause issues for trans* and intersex drivers who are viewed as cis men by driver.

Its almost like this kind of gender binary = safety mindset, while understandable, almost always finds a way to fuck over genderqueer people- specifically those seen as masculine, who are easily put into the "predator" category while also being more vulnerable. And as you mentioned it also ignores how race plays a role in this dynamic- Black and Brown riders and drivers alike are going to deal with these issues much more and much harsher than white people. & like I don't think we can separate this from the cultural impetus that white women must be preserved & protected, and that white women should be hyperparanoid of violation from (Black) men. Not that white women don't have legitimate fears of violence but there's a reason there isn't an option to choose the race of the rider you accept, and why their page about it focuses on images of white women drivers. The addition of "nonbinary" to this is just lip service.

[mariacallous]

I'm seeing a lot of anti-McBride trans people on bluesky acting like being trans is what gives them authority (like a Parker Malloy skeet "it's NOT JUST ABOUT HER. SHUT UP IF YOU AREN'T TRANS YOU DON'T GET IT") and like, idk, I think this really shows that there are other divides within marginalized groups beyond just broad membership in a marginalized group. Contrapoints - who of course got shit from these people for it - has pointed out before that wealthy white trans women who work in tech should maybe chill out on how they appropriate the pain of TWOC who are in high contact sex work, and who make up the vast majority of murders of trans women by male partners. and i think there's a reckoning here that maybe people who work in fields like journalism and academia where there are probably a disproportionate number of people who at least aren't going to throw a shitfit over one trans woman using the bathroom, who are at least trans-supportive enough not to be problems for these people's employment, are mayyyyybe not the best judges of what a politician should do about a rule THAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN ANYWAY, NO MATTER WHAT SHE DOES, BECAUSE REPUBLICANS CONTROL THE HOUSE AND MAKE THE RULES. (the other issue is too many Online Talkers coming from the tech world or other stuff where they don't actually know much about American politics, but are disproportionately likely to think they are experts on everything anyway. This is true of a few fields but I single out tech because I think it's the worst and wayyyy too many online pundits these days come from that world and know fuck all about anything else.) and I think that's why there doesn't seem to be a neat sorting of cis vs. trans in terms of who has sensible, compassionate takes and who thinks yelling online is the only barometer of strength. Because it's really more about whether you understand politics, whether you're aware of how the far right works and the particularly difficult situation the first trans woman is in about how she has to respond to this to not make things even worse, than about being cis vs. trans. ....Although actually one pattern I have noticed is that the most rancid takes are disproportionately coming from white trans people, and a lot of the best takes are coming from POC and particularly black people both cis and trans. Probably because they have some understanding of the issues that surround being the first of a marginalized minority in Congress, and how that has played out for for instance the first black politicians, that a lot of historically- and politically-illiterate white people just do not!

Literally all of this makes sense and none of it surprises me.

[wild-aspen]

You know, I do appreciate that we have at LEAST managed to get to the point in the transandrophobia discourse we're at.

For AGES, literally YEARS, it was "don't use THAT word, figure something else out!" and so we kept changing words.

Finally some of us dug in our heels and said "No, we're not changing it again, just admit this isn't about the word, it's about silencing us because you don't think we deserve to talk about this".

And now the discourse is overall less about "pick a different word" and has moved on to "fine, we'll use your word, but only to mock you because we're finally admitting we don't think you're oppressed and in fact you're actually the oppressors".

This is still a silencing tactic, of course. They're now poisoning the word by marking everyone using it as "truthers", and associating it with being a transmisogynist or an MRA. They also attempt to claim that everyone using the term is white - they do this to erase the POC in the movement. It doesn't matter that the things they say are not true: it's all about controlling the conversation and keeping us quiet.

And this is the same way people have always treated people perceived as female or as women who step out of line - which is how a lot of these people still perceive transmascs, trans men, and some nonbinary people. We're just stupid, delusional little white girls who don't know how good we actually have it. Yes, this is transphobic, sexist, and misogynistic. Yes, it is racist in that it erases trans POC.

Hell, some of them even try to claim we have "afab privilege", which sounds an awful lot like how anti-feminist cis men speak about cis women, claiming cis women somehow have a privileged position in society over cis men.

It's misogyny, sexism, and transphobia, which are all aspects of transandrophobia. These are mixed in with a hatred of masculinity and specifically trans masculinity. It's clearly something unique, and aimed at transmasc people (though anyone can experience it).

In trying to silence us, they just keep proving transandrophobia exists, over and over.

[wolfertinger666]

i feel like I have a lot of nuance on men and how they express femininity from my own personal experiences. cis men can be feminine while facing homophobia and bigotry but can also be seen as more tolerable to people compared to transfeminine individuals, in which people are explicitly transmisognistic about through n through.

and from my own perspective as a BLACK trans man, trans men are mega scrutinized for being feminine to an extent but i noticed the trans men who are feminine but fall into passing/skinny/ and white or at least pale skinned get less shit than say, a trans man who's black/brown, and physically fat (passing or not cuz the trans community has a racism and colorism issue I'm too tired to get into)

i express being feminine in a very specific manner that leans heavily into late 90s and early 2000s black culture/fashion along with alt, while being black and not skinny and disabled so I haven't been met with total kindness. men are accepted as feminine in the queer community to an extent, so it does make my skin crawl to see people talk possible trans women into being "feminine guys" all while also being transphobic towards trans men for not expressing their femininity "correctly"

[januscorner]

Why I think Holyghost is T4T

So we know Grace’s mother respects trans people as she uses Ziggs’s proper pronouns, so it’s not to much of a stretch they’d accept a trans daughter. Grace’s main colors are Pink, Blue, and White (the colors of the trans flag) to the point where she even colors her sign that way

We don’t know that much about Max’s personal life however we can peace some stuff together. We know he has a bad relationship with his dad referencing his dad calling him “a little cuck” maybe because he doesn’t accept him, his reference to Judas likely means his family is Christian only adding to it (obviously not all Christians are transphobes but a good amount of transphobes are Christian)

He seems to be friends with Steph or at least former friends, telling her to get behind him at the Old Waylon Place and offering to protect her. While obviously guys and girls can be friends they’re relationship to me at least reads as childhood girlfriends after one transitioned (from my own personal experience as a trans guy) Also adding to the betrayal and him calling her Judas.

And finally Max’s over performance of masculinity. Max is stereotypical toxic masculinity in human/ghost form. I think it at least started as overcompensating so people see him as a boy although soon after he just went mad with power. Pete mentions knowing him sense the fourth grade, Hatchetfield is a small town so while there are a few different schools a lot of the people at Hatchetfield High probably knew him before he transitioned and maybe even told the people who didn’t. It’s really hard to get people who knew you before you transitioned, especially cis people, to see you as your gender. So Max becomes the epitome of toxic masculinity, they have to see him as a guy now. Plus it’s pretty common for AFAB trans people to lean hard into masculinity at the start of their transition regardless of how they actually want to look.

Also us seeing Max shirtless doesn’t mean anything sense it’s all in Grace’s head, Grace might not even be aware Max is trans (after all who would tell her she doesn’t have friends)

Edit: I just remembered, Pete is hiding from Max in the boys bathroom, if Max is cis there’s no reason Pete would be safe there but if Max can only use the girls bathroom…

[felixblindluck]

A message to trans allies

Cw: Harry Potter and JK

In light of the trio cast being announced, a reminder to trans allies out there, supporting the tv series in any manner is a show of lack of support for the trans community, and the lgbt community as a whole, you can’t have trans friends, or say you are an ally and support the TV show while still holding those values. I know this feels black and white and harsh, but the hatred JK has for the trans community is harsher.

I know it’s hard, but you cannot separate the ‘art’ from the ‘artist’ in this scenario. If I could do it as an autistic person who’s special interest was Harry Potter for most of their childhood/teenage years, then you can to.

Please in this time show extra support for trans people, I have seen too much hatred and lack of thought from people recently, so please think about how your actions and word affect people.

I’m going on a tangent now so I’m sorry, but I went to a concert recently of an amazing trans artist and she made the point of, don’t just buy trans peoples music but actually support them in the real world as well. I have seen her twice and every time am shocked my how many people in the audience misgender her, it sucks. I don’t really know how this relates to what I was talking about above, apart from the fact that lots of the cis people I have been around really don’t think about how their words or actions effect people, may that be personally, or in a wider political and social sense.

Sorry for the rant, I just have feelings, I’m not sure if they are worded how I would like them to be, but at least they aren’t swimming in my head anymore

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

Man, this pisses me off so bad. If you're a woman who relates more to males than other women, it's because you've decided to focus more on how you're different from other women rather than how you're like them. You will literally never have more in common with males, and males do not feel the same way about you. These cute little posts that you write about how you love males more than your fellow women? They do not write the same thing about you. They hate and mock you constantly. Anyone remember "Cis women need to shut up"

"As a cis woman, I agree"

"You need to shut up, specifically"

?

Yea, that's how they feel about you and your solidarity.

The difference between lesbians and trans women in female spaces is the fact that lesbians do not have high rates of violence. There is no group of women that outclass men in terms of violent tendencies. Trans women retain the rates of male violence that regular men do. I'm not saying you have to treat trans women like they're all violent beasts, but if you can't see why female people would be uncomfortable with male people in their spaces, you're either naive or genuinely unsympathetic towards the very real fear that women have of being subjected to male violence. You can't say trans women and lesbians are similar because, unlike males, there is no statistical evidence that lesbians are highly likely to take advantage of a woman. If it turned out that 98% of rapes were committed by lesbians, I would 1000% understand why straight women don't fucking want to be around me. Have some fucking empathy, holy fucking shit. Even if you are completely on board with trans women being in female spaces, at LEAST acknowledge that it makes sense for women to be concerned about who is allowed in their spaces. It's crazy how I could tell someone I have a fear of dogs because one bit me when I was a kid, and they'd put their sweet pooch up, but God forbid a woman be cautious around a demographic who commit 90% of all violent crime. Oh no. That woman is suddenly a terf bitch.

I have nothing in common with trans women. I don't care how much pain they have experienced. We are not the same. When I was twelve, I cried and I cried as I put my palms together to pray to a God I hoped would be able to take away my homosexuality. I didn't even grow up in a particularly homophobic family. Both of my parents were accepting of me, but I still sat in the dark of my room, tears streaming down my face, as I prayed to have my sexuality changed.

Two years later, one of my friends made a joke about me dressing to impress my crush. She said my crushes name---a feminine name. A girl sitting in earshot heard her, turned to me, and asked me with disgust if I was gay. I said no without even thinking about it. It absolutely did not help that we were in a locker room with other girls. I was aware of my sexuality by that point, but I was 14 and unable to hold my own against a girl looking at me like THAT. For a few weeks after that, that girl made comments about how she was "watching me".

I know pain, I know discomfort, I know what it's like to feel predatory. Seeing feminine women, especially if they're white, makes me feel like an alien. I look at them and think "how are we so different? I see none of myself in you."

Sometimes I'm right. Sometimes we're not similar at all. But guess what? That doesn't mean I'm similar to a straight male. Fucking hell, sometimes I'm not similar to other lesbians. That's completely normal. I think OP needs to read better work by cishet women. If you think that there is not a single piece of cishet female writing that can move you more than something written by a male, you're not looking in the right places at all. I don't understand why some LB women seem to think that the very act of someone being a straight woman makes them incapable of relatability. Of course it makes sense for you to be cautious. Lesbians deal with a lot of alienation and predatory feelings, but if the very ACT of a woman being cis and straight makes you feel like she has absolutely nothing in common with you...? The issue lies with you. YOU are the one othering THEM. Not the other way around. You're the one who has decided that a few cis straight women othering you means that they ALL will so you'd better beat them to the punch. You're the one who has decided that your relationship to womanhood is so astronomically different from straight women that nothing they say speaks to you. That's INSANE. Do you realize how much you have to alienate yourself from womanhood to feel more relatability with a male person than a female one? Idk how to tell you this, but it is highly probable that the most cis, most het woman you have ever met has had a period. It's highly likely she's been harassed by a man. It's highly likely she's been made to feel inferior by way of being born female. No, they can't relate to the experience of being a lesbian who is made to feel predatory for no reason, but to say that nothing a cis het woman says/experiences can move you at all? Nothing they say can make you feel like your experience with womanhood and hers are similar? Do you realize how you sound? "Trans women have been harassed by men and made to feel inferior, too!!" Okay! So you should be able to relate to cis women in the way you do trans women, right?

I told my discord server that I was nervous about my future roommates. I showed them photos and someone said "all this tells me is that they're feminine and white" and I literally think about that all of the time. I was projecting. I was so scared that these white, feminine, probably straight women were going to judge me for being a black lesbian that I didn't even realize that I was the one violently judging them based off of nothing but their skin color and their femininity. I knew nothing about them. I STILL know nothing about them. I've barely spoken to them. But already I had labeled them as unrelatable judgemental women because of how they looked. Hold on. Wasn't I the one afraid of them judging ME? How could I be so afraid of them judging me for being a black lesbian when I was the one judging them already? What sense does that make?

You guys are so busy writing off cis straight women as unrelatable bigots that you've failed to see that you're the one who is extremely prejudiced against them. And I absolutely fucking know someone is gonna read this and say "well, you can't say that all trans women have male violence patterns and dahdahdahdah" and it's like. But YOU can say that cis straight women are so unbelievably different from lesbian women that you'd rather say you're more similar to a straight up fucking male???

I'm not saying it's not a little jarring to see women who are so different from me. I'm not saying I haven't been burned before and there's no reason for me (or other lesbians) to be cautious. But I will literally ALWAYS have more in common with cishet women than I ever will a man pretending to be a woman.

One time I had a professor. She was on the older side (I'd say 40's) and white. Not the type of person I'd think I'd click well with. She was straight and married with children. One day we talked after class, and the only thing that ended our conversation was the fact she had an event she had to go to. We would've talked longer if not for that. She emailed me a little while later to tell me that she enjoyed our chat. After that, she actually hugged me on two occasions. You wouldn't think we'd have common ground. An older, straight, married white mother and a young black lesbian. Both of us are "cis" but I can tell you I relate to her much better than I ever could someone born male.

I once had a personal trainer who was a feminine woman. She had acrylic nails and everything. One time she said that she couldn't hug her male friends anymore because she had a boyfriend (he wasn't the one enforcing that rule. That was something she personally felt). Also not someone I thought I'd click well with. But we did. One time we had a really productive discussion that was actually derived from the conversation with my professor. I felt very close to her in that moment. Our conversation came to a close because she had another client, but I still think about that convo.

There have been so many fucking times where I thought "this woman is not like me. Look at her." But what I realized was that I was the judgmental one. I was the one deciding we were different, not her. I was the one writing her off. I was the one convinced we had nothing in common.

I am BEGGING you not to alienate your fellow women. There are no inherent traits that make you unable to relate to other women. No amount of whiteness or cisness or straightness can make a woman completely unreachable. I am NOT talking about political parties or views so don't fucking try me with that shit. Obviously that puts a wedge between people, but someone simply being born cis and het does not make them alien from you. For God's sake, look at the fucking MeToo movement. Women from all fucking backgrounds who share an experience that an unfortunate amount of women go through. Women from all different races, sexualities, etc. who came together to talk about how they've been subjected to sexual violence. Ellen degeneres was one of them. How does that fit into your "lesbians and cishet women cannot relate to each other" spiel?

OP's post has 130k notes and it makes me fucking sick. Holy crap y'all, we need more solidarity than this. Other women are not your enemy. I'm begging you to reconsider your approach to women who are different than you. You are missing out on people who can love and support you in a way that literally no male can. You are depriving yourself. Just because a few cishet women in the past alienated you, does not mean that you have to continue their legacy. Let it go. Everyone on earth can see you embracing your hatred of women, and you wonder why your fellow women never hug you? They fucking can't! Put your hatred down and make space for the love that comes with realizing that you absolutely are like other girls!

[star-the-gremlin]

Some info about the MiracuClass in my au to get me back into the miraculous headspace. It's not much but it's something at least.

Chloe - Red Velvet (ladybug) Red

Pansexual (in denial)

she/her cis

unhealthy favoritism towards her mom

needs to wear glasses but refuses to do so (glares a lot)

spaces out a lot

very low self esteem

Sabrina - Léopard Forcé (cat) Léo

Lesbian (in the closet because homophobic dad)

she/they cis

atheist

anxiety

gender dysphoria

video game addict

fidgets a lot

cheese addict

Adrien - Renard Libre (fox) Renard

bisexual

he/him cis for now

paranoia

model diet malnutrition (best I can describe it)

gender dysphoria

NOT a sentimonster

Marinette - Goldenrod (bee) Goldie

bisexual

she/her cis

adhd

overthinker

AWKWARD

panic disorder

savior complex

Alya - Terrapin (turtle)

bisexual (leaning towards men)

she/her cis

absolutely no awareness of personal danger if it means she gets a good story

nosy af

middle child syndrome

Nino - DJ Cheval (horse) DJ

whoever can match his freak is fair game

he/they cis

obsessed with music

little too naive and childish for his own good

some flavor of neurodivergent

Alix - Roloway (monkey)

aroace

any

history smart but hides it well

spray paint is her passion

"I'm fast as fuck boi" ah energy

dyes and cuts their hair themself

Max - Kalameet yes from Dark Souls, he's a nerd (dragon)

gay ace

he/him cis

atheist

video game addict

unhealthily competitive

gamer rage is definitely there but he keeps it professional if its a multiplayer game

Juleka - Lièvre Blanche (rabbit) Liévre

Lesbian

she/her trans

selective mutism

social anxiety

insomnia

vitamin d deficiency

Rose - Mademoiselle Serpent (snake) Serpent

pansexual

she/her cis

vertigo

adhd

hypefixates on everything

afraid of clowns/mimes etc.

Kagami - Byakko (tiger)

bisexual

she/her cis

NOT a sentimonster

no idea how to talk to people because of isolation

always tired from constant training

her eye bags have eye bags

Luka - Basque Lavande (pig) Basque

aroace

they/them

autism

probably smokes weed

mostly communicates through music

Zoe - Rat King (mouse) King

bisexual (Leaning towards women)

any (prefers masculine)

cares a little too much about what other people think of them to the point it leads her to lying

sort of a jack of all traits

clingy

blue-yellow colorblind

trying very hard to get on Chloe's good side

Ivan - Ram Slam (goat)

straight

he/him cis

anger issues

beneath all the muscle hes a sweetheart just don't piss him off

metal enjoyer

Mylene - Shorthorn (ox)

straight

she/her cis

panic disorder

anxiety

listens to white noise to calm down

likes acting but hates people watching her act

Marc - King Shepherd (dog) Shepherd

gay

he/they/it

autism

social anxiety

selectively mute

conveys his feeling through writing

Kim - Taolon from tao and talon (rooster)

bisexual (leaning towards women)

he/him cis

absolute dumbass

adhd

extremely competitive

spoiled by his parent ("Our boy can do no wrong" type of shit)

too confident for his own good

Nathaniel - no miraculous

bisexual ace

he/him trans

jewish

introverted

not really a team player

daydreams a lot (mostly about his own comic series)

Lila - no miraculous

bisexual

she/her trans

pathological liar

impostor syndrome

gives up immediately if things don't go her way

very good actress (stolen by the theater club)

attention seeker

please someone tell her moms to stop neglecting her she is not okay

[rodolfoparras]

OK imma be honest and little personal, before I knew a little bit more about the LGBT, I just didn't care I just knew they existed, now that im older and apart of it nothing changed ngl...just maybe a little rude with it. I'm like "Oh you're gay? Cool want a cookie?" Or "Oh, you think being gay is the devils or whoever you claim doing? Want a medal?". I don't mind having people like having something for them but a month? Sounds like robbery 2 me like, What about soldiers like I mean the good soldiers who actually fight for their people? I'm sorry, but if I could, I would make certain... things like these two have at least a week, but like I said, I don't mind it... I just find it... wrong in a way...like think about it...when something big happens in your life (if yall do it like me) we just celebrate it in like that first week, like what I mean is for the first few days it's all "WOOHOO THIS HAPPEND TOO YOU" then the rest of the week it's just "congrats". Like I remember a few years back, I'm not sure if it's still the same now. But soldiers die every day and stuff, and all they get is a day, and everyone like "poor soliders rest in peace" and then go on about their lives after a few bours or something . But the moment a Trans person got killed, suddenly everyone dropped everything and talked about it for weeks....trying not to sound harsh, but come on....

Sugar I think you have a lot of inner work to do

Pride month cannot be boiled down to a celebratory party of sexualities and genders

While yes a major part of pride month is to celebrate lgbtq people it’s also about remembering the journey as to how we got here, plenty of people literally laid their lives down so there could be a celebration in the first place sugar I don’t know if you know this but trans people would literally use bricks and drop it onto their genitals or their chest to get rid of those parts, a lot of trans people died of cancer and other terminal illnesses because it was considered shameful to treat an openly trans person no matter what severe condition they had it’s also to raise awareness of how lgbtq people of color made a lot of things possible for us, did you know that before colonization native people had woman man and then a third gender that didn’t fall in either category white, Christian cis people wiped that out because it was considered abnormal and now today we have a whole chunk of people who are seen as abnormal because that whole gender identity has been wiped out pride month is to also raise awareness to everyone who can’t live their lives like they want to. It’s like international women’s day just because women in Europe have it good doesn’t mean that it’s fine and dandy all around the world

The reason as to why people don’t care much for soldiers is that the only ones discussed are American ones- soldiers belonging to armys who have more or less started the war in different places. Never have I seen people discuss the 10.000 soldiers that died in the srebrenica genocide - soldiers- boys 18 year old boys 10.000 of them- that had to forcefully enlist in the army because their country was going through a genocide

And the reason as to why trans people get so much coverage once they get killed is the same reason as to why women get so much coverage when they get horrifically murdered by a man they’re oppressed, soldiers are not oppressed soldier more often than not are the oppressors.

With that being said I do hope you take time to actually do research on your history because the reason as to why you can be like “woo I’m gay ok let’s move on with my day” is because of thousands upon thousands upon thousands lgbtq ppl that made sacrifices for you those sacrifices didn’t happen that long ago