#(sarcasm!!!)
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oh so you’re telling me the guy had a 3 page handwritten explanation of his motives and mindset and a gun and silencer that matches the description despite it being a week since the guy was shot? hmmmm interesting
#how convenient#how convenient for them to just find a guy that happens to have all this shit on him#there’s no way it could have planted#<- sarcasm by the way#luigi mangione#brian thompson#uhc ceo#the claims adjuster#united healthcare#sparkle.txt
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#meme#funny#humor#tumblr memes#memes#tweet#twitter#memes daily#memesdaily#dark humor#polish meme#zabawne#śmieszne memy#polskie memy#memy polskie#poland#po polsku#śmieszne#internet#entertainment#laughter#sarcasm#irony#viral#jokes#satire
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Found this really scary new horror game yall should check out. It's called indeed.com and it has a sequel called linkedin
#it is hell on earth out here#got like 6 different rejection emails today#so much fun /sarcasm#job hunting
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Trans visibility has gotten scarier for years now, and the trans people celebrating today are extraordinary. I love every single one of my trans siblings, including the ones who don't want to be visible today or can't be. Stay safe, and don't let them take your pride away from you.
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i get catcalled while out with friends at 1am and i say "excuse me, i actually identify as a transgender man and i would like to utilize my male privilege to avoid this interaction," and he says "oh i'm so sorry sir, i did not mean to invalidate your gender identity, do you know of any women i could harass instead? sorry again for the trouble"
#text#this is obviously sarcasm . this has never happened in the history of the world#anyway see my addition for the second seriouser post#transandrophobia
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Child abuse is a big problem, so it's important that we don't let children communicate with adults except their parents and other official authority figures. Everyone knows the best way to prevent child abuse is to keep children isolated and ensure all their communications are controlled.
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Thinking back to this panel, I think Tim has an opportunity to be the biggest little shit if truth serum gets involved.
Villain: With that truth serum flowing through Batman's little sidekick's veins, he will have no choice but to reveal the bat's deepest secrets.
Tim (as Robin): So whatever I say now will have to be accepted as the truth, no matter what?
Villain: Yes, because you have no other options.
Tim:
Tim: Batman called me dad once.
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#meme#funny#humor#tumblr memes#memes#tweet#memesdaily#memes daily#dank memes#twitter#polandcore#śmieszne memy#memy#polski tumblr#śmieszne#poland#polska#polish wave#internet#humorous#laughter#satire#jokes#sarcasm#viral#entertainment
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#perfection#it's easy#just do it#sarcasm#don't change#don't blame yourself#don't give up#high standards#workplace harassment#anti harassment#workplace culture#you do you#it's not your fault#tweets#best of tweets#aftermetoo
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Random Funny Batman… Stephanie and Duke Sass the Joker
#art#fan art#dc#dc comics#batman#funny#bat family#fan comic#bat siblings#duke thomas#the signal#stephanie brown#spoiler#joker#the joker#pinkiemachine#don’t worry they’re gonna be fine#they have the power of an over protective dad#and sarcasm on their side
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hm. curious. why would parents act like that. hm. i can't figure it out. hm. it's so disturbing how people get upset about their loved ones suffering. hm. these are the priorities of a normal human society. we are normal. this is normal. everything's fine.
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nothing strange happening here folks. just two men headbonking and sharing a breath like cats tend to do. normal gar activities if i ever saw one.
#if you cant read the sarcasm... im actually lying#they love each other#and thats enough#happy pride the space gays continue to be gay#obi wan kenobi#commander cody#codywan#star wars#star wars fanart#my art#fanart#digital art
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The bath was over. Your skin was pink, your limbs jelly. You were freshly cleaned, warm and wobbly, and Sevika carried you straight out of the tub, towel-dried your body like you were helpless, and now you were lying facedown on the bed.
Naked. Wet hair. Whimpering into the pillow.
“Mmhm,” Sevika murmured, climbing up behind you. “So now you’re quiet?”
You huffed. “I’m recovering. You fucked the hell outta me.”
“You’re still dramatic.”
“And you’re still not sorry.”
She snorted. “I literally carried you out the tub like a princess.”
“Yeah, ‘cause I have spaghetti legs from all the orgasms you forced outta me.”
“That’s not how forcing works, baby.”
You grumbled. She laughed.
And then, click.
You lifted your head. “What was that?”
“don’t tell me you’re putting on a strap now..” you added
She held up a lotion bottle. Smirked. “Turn over.”
“…Why.”
“I’m moisturizing you.”
You blinked. “That’s intimate.”
“Shut up and roll over.”
You did. Dramatically.
And then gasped when her cold hands met your thighs.
“hey, it’s cold!”
“Quit whining.”
Her hands slid up, smoothing lotion over your legs, then your hips, slow and firm. She knew exactly where to press, massaging in with her thumbs, strong fingers digging just enough to make your muscles melt. Up your sides, across your belly, over your arms.
She was careful with your small tits, brushed her knuckles along them teasingly, grinning when you arched up into the touch like a spoiled little brat.
“You’re so needy,” she muttered.
“You like it.”
“eh, I do.”
When she was done, she helped you up, kissed your cheek, and handed you one of her old tank tops. faded dark navy. A little stretched out. Stolen from her old drawer.
she pulled it over your head and,
damn
It was tight.
Like… skin-tight.
It clung to your tits like they were trying to bust out of it, your hard nipples clearly visible through the soft fabric. The hem barely covered your ribs.
“Sevika,” you whispered. “This is so small.”
“Yeah,” she said, staring openly. “I was sixteen. That thing’s vintage.”
“I look like a slut.”
“You look like a problem.”
You looked behind and said, “Omg.. this is strangling my tits.”
“…what tits?” she chuckled.
you gave her the NASTIEST side eye ever. “you are a bitch!!”
then she sat back after you flipped her off, lips parted, watching you adjust the fabric over your chest. Her eyes dropped lower. You hadn’t put on shorts.
Just lace panties.
Black. Thin. A little sheer. Framing your soft thighs and still-flushed skin like a gift.
Sevika’s jaw tensed.
You blinked innocently. “What?”
She dragged a hand down her face. “You’re doing this on purpose.”
“I’m literally recovering from trauma.”
She gave you a look. “Trauma.”
“hey, your tits traumatised me.” (u were just suckin on them 😇)
“I will bite you.”
You giggled, crawling into her lap, legs straddling her hips, your tiny tank top bunching at your waist. Your small tits brushed against her chest and you grinned smugly when her breath hitched.
“Am I forgiven yet?” you whispered, arms wrapping around her neck. “You got to punish me, make me cum, bathe me, lotion me up… all that’s missing is praise.”
Her hands gripped your waist.
Her eyes? Dark.
“You want praise now?” she murmured, low and dangerous. “After all that?”
You nodded slowly. “Just a little.”
Her lips brushed your neck.
“You’re perfect,” she whispered. “Prettiest tits I’ve ever seen.”
You shivered.
“Look so fucking good in my shirt,” she added, voice deepening. “You think you’re teasing me. But you’re driving me insane.”
You smiled against her mouth.
“Mm. Then let me be your problem.”
this might be the sequel to this fic 🤭🤭
↪️ reblogs are appreciated!!
masterlist check this out??
taglist: @amri0ram @thehoneybeestings @georgiahs-stuff @mistershotz @mommyissuesismypersonality @sapphicstrawcore @sevikaswinkinghole @shanesevikasfuckdoll @sevikas-whore @shxdy0ariia @illbecanon
#arcane#sevika#sevika x reader#x reader#lonerslug#big mama#lesbian#arcane sevika#sevika fluff#wlw#fluff#yuri#sevika my love#sevika my wife#wlw ns/fw#sapphic post#no smut#finally… fluff#sevika arcane#*🦗🦗🦗*#sarcasm#one shot#sapphic#sapphic fanfiction#arcane league of legends#wlw smut#pride month#sapphic blog#arcane league of lesbians#lesbian sevika
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thank you staff for protecting your user base and good old fashioned family values by flagging *checks notes* cutesy lgbt stickers 👍
#//sarcasm#edit: the spongebob background is not part of the original post guys. it’s a filter so people know it’s a screenshot
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