#(unless you want me to know and i'll accept/respect that)

[just-mythyk]

just had the thought "i don't care if you're traumagenic or endogenic you're a system and that's all i gotta know"

to clarify, if you’re a system, well. you’re experiencing system things. so what’s it matter to me how it all started? there’s a bunch of people in there to be respecting

[promenadewithme]

Twelve days of Christmas - Chapter 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem! reader Word Count: 1.8K words Warnings: sexual innuendo, mentions of sex, slight angst, established marriage, divorce, the holidays, idk what triggers you so tell me if I should add anything else. a.n.: sorry for taking a few days to upload this, i've been christmas shopping and got down with some kind of flu that has me feeling unwell. I promise I'll post more if you guys like this, though.

part 1 part 2 part 3

“He’s getting away, Barnes” Stark reprimanded through the com in James’ ear “Forget to eat breakfast today? Where is that abiding need to keep the streets of New York safe? That unwavering stamina? Don’t tell me you’re getting old.”

The pokes had him grinding his teeth and stomping harder down the stairs. He forced himself to calmly answer “Your mother had no complaints last night.”

A distant cackle came through the com, which he imagined could have only been Thor, before Stark quipped “Then where the hell is your head at, Barnes?”

At my daughter’s recital that started 40 minutes ago all the way across town, thanks for asking. James thought with a moody frown on his face as he started jumping down the flights of stairs.

“Why don’t you do the chasing for a change?” he sassed, catching a glimpse of the assailant’s clothes just as he turned a corner.

Having been in the military as a young adult, one would expect more respect for the boss. But James was cranky, would rather be with his family, and was not in the mood for Stark’s cockiness. Besides, he was the best private detective in the agency and Stark knew it.

James picked up his pace, mere meters away from the target, only for the emergency exit door to slam open into the criminals’ face, with none other than Tony Stark on the other side.

“I don’t do the running.” He answered, smugness written all over his face “That’s what I pay you for.”

With a roll of his eyes and a huff, James bent down to search the man’s pockets. Two guns, four knives and what sure looked a lot like chloroform, were handed over to Bruce – the forensics guy, who accepted them with a tight-lipped awkward smile.

The man on the floor, a stalker that had been chasing one of their clients for the past months, attempted to get up. ‘Attempted’ being the key word considering James handcuffed him in seconds, getting halfway to the vehicle before his boss could reach him.

“Nice work today, kid.” He praised as James closed the door to the police car that waited outside.

Stark had friends in very important places, friends who appreciated the help that his company provided. Both monetary and otherwise. The police force was one of them, despite their motto being ‘doing all the men in blue could not do’.

“Thanks, man.” He replied while nodding at Steve, the police officer they usually worked with and his childhood friend.

“You can go home now; I’ve got it from here.” Stark patted his back as Steve drove away.

“I still have to write up the report and tell our client we caught the guy.”

In all honesty, James didn’t know why he didn’t accept. He wanted to go home, to go to his wife and baby girl. He also knew that he had a job to do, a job that wouldn’t finish itself.

“I’ll do that.” He reassured, earning an eyebrow raise from James, who was sure he had never touched paperwork in his life. With a huff and an eyeroll, he admitted “Fine, I’ll get Pepper to do it.”

“Pepper already has enough on her plate having to babysit you.” James replied, walking to his car.

Tony followed close behind “How about you let me worry about Pepper and you go home to your wife. Unless you want to do it the other way around, I’d be fine with that too. Tell me, how has beautiful (y/n) been - ”

He was cut off by a low growl emitted from James’ throat. His wife was beautiful, it was a fact, one he did not mind people noticing. Except when it came to Tony, the biggest playboy known to man.

“Down boy.” Stark lifted his hands in surrender “You should really let go of all that pent up energy. You know, there’s this reiki place down the street from - ”

“I don’t need to unwind.” He lied through his teeth.

James desperately needed to let it all out, preferably in his wife. The problem was that most days he got home after you were fast asleep and left before you awoke. It was hell, it was torture. It meant jacking off in the shower to the thought of you while being careful to not make too much noise, even though it was never really enough, not the same as you. It meant having way too much sexual energy and lashing out on everyone.

“Whatever you say, Barnes.” He sighed in defeat “But I do think you should take the rest of the year off. You’ve been my top employee of the year, it’s almost Christmas, just… Have a little fun for once. Take your wife on a date, take your kid ice skating, hell go crazy and rent a cabin in the woods. As much as this James is good for business, I miss the old Bucky. Corny and in love as he might have been, he was also a pretty decent guy. Besides, the clients are starting to get scared of that scowl of yours.”

Maybe it was time for a break; to spend some time with his girls, God knows he missed them.

“I’ll think about it.” He nodded, unlocking his car.

And that he did. James thought about it on the slow drive to Olivia’s school, he thought about it when he saw that all the chairs were already stacked, he thought about it on his way home, and when he saw your disappointed face as he walked through the door.

You looked so beautiful, all dolled up and Christmassy. You also looked broken, tired. Bucky had a sneaking suspicion it was because of him.

Closing the door behind him, he measured his next words, but nothing came out. No excuses, no explanations. He knew he was running; he just didn’t know why.

“You missed her recital.” Your voice came out hoarse and he realized your eyes were puffy. The realization that he had made you cry made James’ heart sink to his stomach.

“I know.” He whispered, feet plastered to the floor, unable to move from the door. Like he was ready to bolt at any moment.

“You are never home.”

“I know.”

“You come home after midnight every single day.”

“I know.”

“She misses you, I-” you halted before admitting “I miss you.”

That was when he found it in himself to move, to kneel before you and kiss both your hands while apologizing.

I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Left his lips with every kiss he planted all over your hands, before resting his face on your thighs.

Tears filled your eyes again and it took all your strength not to back down, but you said it.

“James, I want a divorce.”

His heart stopped, and it sped, and it broke into a million pieces. You watched as his head slowly rose, his distressed gaze meeting yours.

“What?” he couldn’t have heard you right, could he? There was no way he could have messed up this badly.

“I can’t do this anymore.” You said, voice breaking “I can’t wake up every day knowing you won’t be here, I can’t listen to you coming home in the middle of the night and leaving before I can say goodbye, I don’t know what to do for you to love me. I’ve tried everything and I never seem to be enough for you.”

“No, doll, please.” He looked deep into your soul, holding both of your hands, afraid that if he let go, he would lose you forever, knowing there was a chance he already had “I love you. I love you so much. Please, we can work this out. Don’t leave me.”

“Leave you?” you seethed, untangling your hands from his and standing “No, James, I’m not the one who is leaving. You are the one who left. You are the one who runs away from his family, who overworks, who jerks himself off in the middle of the night instead of having sex with his own wife, who doesn’t even care to show up. If you truly loved me, if you loved us, you would be here. You would have been there today, when Liv needed you present.”

“I know I messed up but let me make it up to you. I can be present, I can come home earlier, I want to have sex with you.” He was on his knees; he did not know what he could say to make you believe him.

“James, it’s been eight months since I had an orgasm.” You said, walking into the kitchen to make yourself some tea. Anything to ease your nerves “I want a divorce.”

He followed you like a lost puppy; it would have been cute if your heart wasn’t weeping. James racked his brain, thinking of anything that could make you stay, that could help you change your mind. You were stubborn, the only person who could ever make you soft was Livvie. It was like a lightbulb went on in his brain. Liv. She was the key, the bond.

“Okay.” He said, even though it was the last thing he meant.

“What?”

It was what you wanted, right? So why did it feel like someone stepped on the already shattered pieces of your heart? Maybe, deep down, you wished he would fight for you.

“We can get a divorce.” He nodded slowly “But I want to give Olivia one last happy Christmas. Think about what it would do to her little mind if we separated during the holidays. It’s what, ten days till Christmas now?”

“Twelve as of tomorrow.” You answer, seeing his point.

“Stark gave me the rest of the year off. Let’s make the happiest memories with her, ones she will remember and not be traumatized by, let her have one last Christmas. Let us have one last Christmas.”

 You considered his words. Liv was six now, she was definitely old enough to remember this divorce and James was right, it could potentially make the holidays traumatic in some way. That was the last thing you wanted. It was only twelve days, right? What’s the worst that could happen?

“Alright.” You conceded and James let out the air he was holding in “Twelve days.”

“We pretend nothing happened, we act happy and in love, we make this the perfect Christmas. Deal?” he outstretched his hand, afraid that any other form of contact would make you push him away.

“Deal.” You took his hand, letting it linger as you looked into his somber grey eyes. Oh, how you would miss those, how you missed them already.

What to Liv would be the perfect Christmas, to you was the hardest goodbye. Would you be able to spend 12 days without changing your mind? Would James be able to spend them without letting you down again? Remember all the times he wasn’t there. A small voice uttered in your mind. It was enough for you to remove your hand from his and say goodnight. Twelve days would go by in a flash, you could do this. For Liv.

taglist: @ordelixx, @julvrs, @milanaasblog, @buckystevelove, @galactict3a , @ilovetaquitosmmmm , @tpwkcaryslizb , @unadulteratedpastazonkpeach

If you enjoy my work and are able to contribute, please leave me a tip here 🫶

divider by @bernardsbendystraws

[damnfandomproblems]

Fandom Problem #5548:

Which one says more "groomer"?

"NSFW - Trigger warnings: age gap, noncon 18+ only, dead dove do not eat, minors keep out" "What you enjoy in fiction is mot necessarily what you think is acceptable or good in real life, and that's okay. Just be courteous and respect people's boundaries, tags, filters, and content warnings are useful tools. Fiction is a safe way of exploring unsafe concepts. Many people use fiction as a method to work through their traumas, but its okay even if that's not the reason they like it, some people are just drawn to taboo subjects, that's completely natural. Regardless we're not going to try to force people to open up about their past traumas, nor any other personal information. No story should be banned from being told just because it makes some people uncomfortable. Art is meant to provoke intense emotions, afterall. Even if I don't like something, it's not my business to tell someone else what they should or should not create. I'm an adult and its MY responsibility to manage my emotional responses, not anyone else's. If you find yourself unable to manage please remove yourself from this space and find somewhere more suitable.

or

"EVERY OTHER ADULT BUT ME is out to get you!! I'M the only one I can trust!! I only like WHOLESOME ships and WHOLESOME content!! Look at this GROSS NASTY PORN someone made!! They tried to hide it because they don't want anyone to know what a GROSS FUCK they are!! That's why I'm showing it to all of you!! I can't trust anyone unless you detail ALL of your privileges and your traumas! And if anyone steps one toe out of line by enjoying a problematic cartoon ship I'll publicly shame them and tell all my other 14 year old friends to bully harass cyberstalk and socially ostracize them as well and if they don't I'll make sure the same thing happens to them!! This is for the SAFETY of other minors and NOT because of any petty personal vendetta!! ALSO I think its a good idea to send specifically minors to mess with people who - I claim to truly believe are - ACTUAL REAL PEDOPHILES-- to totally frickin own them online!! Anyone who disagrees with me is a pdo and gromer!!! So ONLY LISTEN TO ME!!! NO opposing or outside perspectives allowed!! I'm a good, SAFE, HEALTHY, NORMAL ADULT!! PROSHITTERS KYS!!!!!!"

[velvetvexations]

RE: Egg jokes, I always kinda thought a cardinal rule of the queer community, and especially the trans community, was never calling someone something they don't want to be called? What the hell happened to that?

Like it really feels like the two sides of this are arguing different points, like the "don't make egg jokes unless you know the person is cool with it and stop immediately if they aren't because some people might like them but for some it genuinely makes it a lot harder for them to come out or is just uncomfortable if they genuinely are cis" side is clearly just arguing that you should respect people's boundaries and maybe consider that not everyone is validated or helped by the same things, and that's okay, which is extremely fucking reasonable, and the other side is arguing that not wanting to be the subject of egg jokes or having a bad history with them makes you a transmisogynist because some trans women were helped by them and being called a woman isn't a bad thing ever no matter what, so the only reason you'd be against them/uncomfortable when they're directed your way is if you hate trans women and want them to suffer, which is frankly insane.

I just wanna grab "hating egg jokes is bigoted" types and be like "your expiriences are not universal, someone else not liking the jokes doesn't invalidate your gender or journey, it's literally not about you, and you should have learned to not call people things that make them upset in fucking kindergarten, so why are you, an adult, acting like a 4 y/o who hasn't figured out that other people exist and have feelings??" I mean, I hate being called "a person with disabilities" or "differently abled" but if a disabled person genuinely prefers those terms I'll fucking use them, or at least not call them a disabled person, because it's not about me anymore. Seems like a no-brainer.

If the person likes the jokes or feels like they helped, fine, who cares, use them all you want or simply acknowledge and accept that different things help different people and it is good that another person could help them, we should be glad they have friends who are there for them when they need it. If a person asks you not to make those jokes or talks about how they personally were extremely uncomfortable with them and it made their transition harder don't make those jokes around them, and validate their struggle and be sympathetic to how hard it is to have friends not respect your boundaries. Like people who don't like egg jokes aren't arguing that being called trans or a woman is an insult, we're arguing that you should respect other people's boundaries and the response to that is never "well your boundaries are problematic so I'm ignoring them fuck you" like??? This is kindergarten level stuff, how is it hard to grasp???? Y'all need to stop holding someone's head underwater while insisting you're helping them. That's all we're saying.

(Keep anon if it breaks pls <3)

it's truly an excuse to just not have to make any alterations to your behavior or ever show any restraint whatsoever

[butterflydm]

Significant thing- in 1x08, Rand said that Egwene's desire for more was part of what made her the woman he loved.

(spoilers through 3x06 below; show only spoilers)

Here in 3x06, he says that her desire for more makes her someone he respects.

(And obviously that moment in 1x08 is all about Rand's respect for Egwene's desire for more, but it was framed in his love for her. Now, it isn't)

And I also noticed... and correct me if I'm wrong but... I don't think Rand has ever directly said he loves Selene | Lanfear. The closest we got was him lumping her into the people he loves that he should stay away from back in 2x04 (a category that also included his friends, not only Egwene). Unless I missed it somewhere?

Both of the times when Rand's confirmation of loving Selene | Lanfear was sought, he didn't actually answer.

Okay, it's gonna bug me if I don't confirm, so exact quotes:

On Egwene, in 1x08, Rand says: "What about what she wants? As much as I love her, as much as I want this, I know that she doesn't. That woman... who doesn't care about being a Wisdom... being an Aes Sedai... that's not the woman I love."

That was the moment when Rand began the process of letting Egwene go, when he accepted that he was not what she wanted.

Contrast to what he says here in 3x06: "We both know the truth, Egwene. You don't want me. Even back in the Two Rivers, there was always something that you wanted more. And even now... I am... the Dragon Reborn. I'm not enough. I'll always respect that about you."

(and then Rand gets the "Lanfear is actively torturing me at night" bombshell)

Back in 3x01, he is unwilling to confirm to Mat & Perrin that he and Egwene are back together because they have not had a conversation about it. And throughout this entire season, they have still not had a conversation about it until right here, where Rand basically has the conversation with Egwene that he needed to have right after his realization in 1x08; that he and Egwene have paths that don't align.

And the two Selene | Lanfear moments:

2x04:

Rand: "They say when men go mad... they kill the people they love first. So I'll go as far away as I can." Lanfear: "Are you saying you love me?" (a pause as Rand doesn't answer. he looks at the ground. then he looks over to the side) Lanfear: "Why didn't you tell me you could channel?" (as she switches gears from "ramp up Rand's loneliness and pain" to "Whoo! We got him, girls!") Rand: "You are the first woman who's ever seen me as a man. I didn't want you to see me as a monster."

And now 3x06:

Egwene: "Do you love her?" (a pause as Rand doesn't answer) Egwene: "It's already happened then? The madness." Rand: "If that's easier for you to swallow, then believe that."

Like... it feels like we got a pretty glaring lack of an answer both times? Rand is being practically Aes Sedai here in his lack of answers. Unless I forgot another conversation somewhere.

[windsweptinred]

Long personal post warning 😅. 

In June 2020, our wedding was cancelled due to covid. And we shrugged good naturedly and said, why not increase our little family instead? And thus our near five year journey with secondary infertility began. 

Because we already had a child, (my daughter from a previous relationship), the NHS refused to help us save a few preliminary tests. Which we utterly respected, there are those who need fertility treatment far more than us. Private IVF was not an option financially, so we were left with a shrug, a diagnosis of unexplained fertility and given over to the hands of fate.  

I could write an essay on what it's like to struggle with infertility, the sheer powerlessness of it. But instead, I'll just say it's a journey I truly wouldn't wish on anyone.  It's a perpetual, inescapable monthly cycle of hope and despair that slowly chips away at you. It can take an immense, destructive toll on your mental health, your relationship and your sense of worth. And is something, I've found, that's phenomenally hard to emphasise with unless you've experienced it first hand. Thus it can be very lonely and isolating to experience. It made me truly hate hope for a time, I don't think I can sum up the pain of it any more poignantly than that.

It wasn't a straight line from hard to easy. We had good times and bad times, and sometimes ALL our energy went into our daughter, making sure she was happy and thriving. Because no matter what we were going through, she was always the most important thing in our lives. 

When I started writing this post back in March, it was for closure. We'd reached a place of acceptance. After four years and ten months we'd agreed with heavy hearts it was time to stop trying. Hope was becoming a painful burden and clinging to it a hindrance rather than a help. It was time to stop stalling life, bring this chapter to an end and start anew. When my next monthlies arrived, that was it. Full stop. Time to move on to new adventures. 

Surprise, surprise, no period came. After nearly five years, I was pregnant. It was so blindsiding I don't think we let ourselves believe it for two whole weeks. 😅 I'm not sure we even we let it fully sink in until today (Our 12 week scan). Our son/daughter Robin is due in early December. And it's still such a shock I'm not sure I can put into words how it feels. But the best bit is, our daughter  finally gets to be the older sibling she's always wanted so desperately to be. And we know she's going to be such an amazing big sister.  

[captainzigo]

Hi everypony!

My kofi is ko-fi.com/captainzigo if you enjoy my art, consider leaving me a tip! this is otherwise entirely a labor of love so,,,

you can also send a request with your tip! but if you choose to do so, please read the disclaimer later on in this post**

my non-art blog, where i accept asks is @snapewife-divorce-lawyer and my reblog-spam blog is @3amgaypotion also i am on bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/captainzigo.bsky.social

that's a bunch of pictures of my oc(/ponysona) Prickly Pear. she's a cowgirl

Frequent/noteworthy questions below the break

**on donations made to me:

if you send a request with a donation, there's a 99% chance i'll do it. and that remaining 1% i'll probably just ask you for a different request. if you send me a request with a donation you are not sending me a commision. you are making a donation, and i might do you a favor as a result. you do not own the resulting art. and I am under no obligation to complete it or to do it in the way that you like. you do not need to make a donation in order to make a request.

DM me about commissions

on sending me asks:

any asks you send me should be like Strongbad emails. one paragraph. no attachments. unless you are sending me refs.

in any interactions, please keep in mind that i am a stranger on the internet and act accordingly.

unless I have explicitly said otherwise, you can safely assume that I do not count you amongst my friends. it is nothing personal, it is in fact the opposite.

why am i like this?

i am autistic. i say this because representation matters, but also because i would like to ask that you please be very frank with me. i don't even really need your patience. just say what you mean and we will get along fine.

can you draw my ocs?

you most certainly can draw any of my ocs. i'd love that acually. tag me

on (re)posting my art:

do not post my art on other platforms. do not repost my art period. I don't really exist on other platforms since i deleted Twitter. So if you see my stuff on other platforms, it's not me. except for my bluesky.

transformative works are obviously allowed, at least here in USamerica where i live. but if you want my blessing, please keep them SFW, and try to keep the spirit of the original artwork

is my blog SFW?

im in my twenties. i keep my blog SFW (as i define it) as a strict rule.

i do not consider the fact that sex exists, that some people enjoy it, or some innuendo to be NSFW. i also do not consider swearing, even as tho a sailor might, to be NSFW.

are NSFW interactions ok?

in short: no. while i have no aversion to to that sort of thing, and often actually enjoy it, i keep this blog SFW. the intention behind my art is to be SFW even when it might be skirting the line. in general, and especially, specifically with mlp, i do not wish to have NSFW interactions on the internet. please respect this boundary.

on shipping:

in my opinion, all romance real or fictional should be between people who are similar in age, doing age appropriate things, not closely related, and all with mutual consent. i am not interested in witnessing or interacting with anything outside of these parameters.

on my blue hair and pronouns:

i am a trans woman. i am also bisexual. i am also poly and demi since im listing things. i am out online becasue i know how important it is to know that you aren't alone.

do i take constructive criticism?

NO 🖕👹🖕 FUCK YOU!!!!!!! GET BLOCKED IDIOT!! unless you are a marginalized person who feels i have unintentionally made you uncomfortable somehow with my art or otherwise. in that case i am sorry and you do me a great favor by calling me out. OTHERWISE FUCK YOU DUMBASS IF YOU DONT LIKE MY ART GO DRAW YOUR OWN 🖕🖕🖕🖕

“i hate bronies”…

i don't necessarily hate you if you self identify with that label. i like to make myself off-putting to keep creeps away. i talk about it more in this post: https://www.tumblr.com/captainzigo/744131513208176640/when-i-say-i-hate-bronies-in-my-header-its

brony?

i don't hold a lot of nostalgia for old brony stuff. infact it's quite the opposite. i was a child when the show came out, and more than that i am a girl. i am not a brony.

do i like g5?

i like all generations of mip including the new stuff. gen 4 is just the one i grew up with

why is my header aurora, bori and alice from the best gift ever?

well that would be because i hate them like a mother hates a child. like the sun hates the moon. like a sickly victorian child hates the slightest morsel of bread.

on flurryheart:

i often draw stuff about cozy glow x flurry heart. this is with the understanding that cozy glow spends about a decade turned to stone. nullifying the age gap.

🤓☝️ i think you mean effect, not affect

i am dyslexic. i spell stuff wrong all the time and i type weird. please don't bother correcting me. wooptydoo your brain is wired normally. sending you a medal.

on my username:

i've had the same username since i debuted on the internet. zigo is the name of an oc i made that i dont really talk much about anymore. zigo is a fine enough nickname, and at least one person calls me that irl.

[ddejavvu]

pairing: daniel x reader (love actually)

summary: your neighbor is very enthusiastic about his new hobby, and you're tired.

a/n: there is no last name that i could find for daniel which really sucks </3 anyways i want to smooch him

You're going to kill them. You're actually going to commit homicide, perhaps you'll even take one of those damn drumsticks and use it as the murder weapon. One through the eye would be a good start, right? You'll stick the other one where the sun doesn't shine.

Your slippers scratch noisily against the pavement leading up to your neighbors' front door, and you hear the incessant drumming grow louder the closer you get to their house. Finally you're on the porch, and you think something in your ears may have ruptured by now.

You raise a fist to the door, but quiet, polite knocking won't be heard over the racket inside. You have to pound against it instead, and you'd cringe at the aggression if it weren't necessary.

Ten seconds pass, and you're almost convinced that you've gone unheard despite your frantic knocking. The chilly winter air stings your ankles where your pajama pants have rucked up near your thighs, and you shimmy them back down your legs to rid your skin of goosebumps. Your sleep shirt is warm but not snow-worthy, and you seriously consider giving up to dive back into your warm bed. But sleep won't come unless the drums cease, and you're determined to get your rest.

You're nearing the twenty second mark, close to driving your car straight through their front door just to be heard, but you hear the soft click of a lock, almost inaudible over the drumming, and the door swings open. A rush of warm air hits you and your bones ache with cold, but you're quickly distracted from any trivial concerns such as hypothermia when you see the man standing in front of you.

He's nearly as tall as the doorframe, but he's got an air about him that's so gentle you'd have expected him to be a mouse in a kids' cartoon. His face is kind and his smile only helps, a soft, welcoming curve that feels just as cozy as the inside of his home.

Suddenly, the drumming doesn't seem so bad.

"Hello," He greets, his voice a deep timbre that carries warmth but not heat, a lilt to it that's not common in your region, "Can I help you?"

If you'd known you would be faced with the human embodiment of a crackling fireplace, gentle and cozy and irresistible, you might have chosen more respectable attire than pajamas. As it stands, you're on his front porch in slippers and flannel pants, so you inhale and square your shoulders, powering on regardless.

"Hello," You return the formality, desperately searching for some of the guiding fury you'd felt only seconds ago, "I know it's broad daylight, but I worked the night shift last night, and- well, I was trying to get some sleep. I was wondering if the aspiring musician could postpone their practice for a little while?"

When you get to the point of your visit the man's face drops, his lips turning down and his eyes glinting with something akin to worry. It's sweet and undeserving of the rage you'd wanted to inflict on him when you'd first set out, and you tamp down guilt that tries stabbing at your heart.

"Uh, give me just a moment," He chuckles weakly, still supported by background percussion, "I'd call for him to stop but he wouldn't hear me. Wait, uh- y'can step in if you'd like," He steps away from the door, holding it open for you. You feel awkward accepting the invitation, but you'd feel worse declining it, so you let him usher you inside, relishing the warmth that surrounds you as he shuts the door on the cold outside.

He starts down the hallway and you linger in the entryway, stuck between looking around and keeping to yourself. You finally give and glance to your left, catching sight of a framed picture on a table in front of a trinket tray.

"Sam-o," The man calls, but despite being right outside his door, the drummer doesn't hear him, "Sam! I'll-" He turns back towards you, a sheepish grimace on his face, "I'll go in."

"Right," You nod, happy to turn back towards the photo you'd seen earlier while he wrangles who you're sure is a very surly, very rebellious teenager in the midst of his rock 'n' roll phase.

The picture is of the man and a little boy, presumably his son, taken on a dock overlooking a lake. The boy is holding a fish that's almost too small to be seen, but his grin is wide, making up for the less-than-impressive catch. He's clearly proud of himself, and the man looks to be as well, holding him up with an equally large smile.

They look like a very happy family, and your heart beats faster at the endearing display. The drums cease from the other room, and you hear muffled voices take their place.

You notice more photos of the boy scattered around, but no other children; perhaps he's an only child. You don't have time to evaluate much more, though, because the man returns, and tucked beneath his arm is the boy from the pictures.

Where you were expecting a jaded seventeen-year-old rockstar, you see a four-foot batman, the black-and-grey hoodie zipped up over blue jeans. His apologetic grin is very unlike the surly protector of Gotham, though, and you consider telling his father to buy him a CareBears sweatshirt next time.

"Hello," He nods, voice soft but polite as his dad stands beside him, "I'm sorry my drumming woke you."

"He's practicing for a big showcase," His dad informs you, a large hand squeezing the boy's shoulder encouragingly, "But he can practice tomorrow."

"Oh," You're nearly lost for words, caught in a whirlwind of unexpected fondness for the pair, "I- I don't mean to slow you down, I'm sorry. It's just that the Christmas season is very busy at work, and I need to be in tomorrow morning. So- uh, my schedule is a little thrown off."

"It's alright," The man smiles, kindness etched into every crease of his face, "Sam has plenty of other opportunities to practice. And I'm- Daniel, by the way."

Daniel holds his free hand out, the other still comfortingly closed around Sam's shoulder. You're quick to join them and the handshake is firm, Daniel's hand much larger than your own, and much warmer to boot.

"My goodness, you're frozen," He chuckles sympathetically, a chill surely lingering on his skin the same way his warmth does on yours, "Would you like a cup of tea? I can brew chamomile, it'll make you sleepy."

Basic etiquette would be to kindly refuse, to not overstay your welcome, and to thank the boy for postponing his drum practice. But your still-racing heart is not one to listen to logic or etiquette, and you find yourself bashfully accepting his offer.

"Oh- um, if it's no trouble. Chamomile sounds nice."

"No trouble at all," He smiles, patting Sam on the shoulder, "Would you like some tea, Sam-o?"

The boy's button nose scrunches, and he shakes his head, "No thanks. I'll be in my room."

Daniel chuckles, and you find yourself grinning with shared amusement as the boy retreats.

"No drumming!" Daniel calls after him, and Sam turns in the doorway, teasing exasperation on his features.

"Alright, no drumming. Y'know, I'm trying to get a girl to fall in love with me," Sam informs you, speaking with the matter-of-factness that you'd expect from a professor, not an elementary schooler, "But I think learning to play the drums was a waste of time."

Daniel's brow furrows, probably lamenting the hours of noise he'd endured for nothing "Oh, why?"

"I could have just offered her tea instead," The boy grins, slipping into his room before either of you can stop him.

His childishly brazen comment leaves you and Daniel stiff with awkwardness, and you feel his eyes upon you. You meet his incredulous gaze with one of your own, and a breathy laugh escapes from his lips as he lingers near the kitchen.

"Well. Perhaps I've shown him Titanic one too many times as of late. But if you're going to fall in love with me, I think I should know your name first."

His smile is cheeky and you run with it, letting him lead you to a kitchen island. You sit at one of the stools as he occupies himself with a kettle, retrieving a box of chamomile tea from a nearby cupboard.

"I'm Y/N," You laugh, "And if you're able to help me get some sleep before work in the morning, there's a very good chance that I will fall in love with you."

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - It's 2024 & I'm talking about TayNew... really?

(They pretty much told us all to sit down and shut tf up, 'cause they got this. AND THEY DO.)

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Feb 2024 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube grey) ep 9 of 12 - I broke. In my defense, it was Monday, I needed comfort, and TayNew were right tf there. Ya know what? They are great in this show. It's a great adaptation. I might like it more than the JBL live action. You know why? Really, honestly WHY...?

That was a PHENOMENAL KISS. Those boys did Thailand fucking proud. They did fandom a solid. Thank you OGs for reminding us how it's done. I was getting used to SloppyHot. And SloppyHot has its place, but that TayNew rooftop kiss was a top tear class act. It was tender and sweet and respectful and joyful. It was eye work and breath work and years of practice. How very far BL has come while still staying so much the same. TayNew - I salute you!

(Read all about distribution issues here.)

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 12fin - we waiting, I guess? Bah.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - The recipe book thing was so damn cute and I love a claiming. YOU KNOW I LOVE A CLAIMING!

In fact, I love OffGun.

I love food based BL.

I adored seeing a reboot of "the infamous dragging". 

But I don’t love anything else about this show. Sigh.

1000 Years Old ep 1 of 12 - Finally we get our gay vampire BL from Feel Good Bangkok. Stars Shane (My Engineer) and fresh face Opal, directed by Champ (2gether). It’s kind of odd but enjoyable. A group of teen UFO seekers find a vampire instead. Opal looks a bit like a mix between Newnu + Leo (VIXX) - so cute + edge. Also, nice to see Shane again on our screens after so long. 

Finally, I like the subtle (and sometimes not subtle) presence of ghosts permeating this show. Do the friends know she's there? Do they know she's dead? Is the existence of paranormal accepted but not that of aliens? Or are the two combined? Is this lazy writing or just fun world building? Who cares! It's enjoyable.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 12fin - the nail painting bit was very cutie queers and I've not seen it done in BL before, so that was nice. For some reason captions never dropped for me on this last episode, but it didn’t really matter. Not much happened and I understood everything anyway.

Quick pitch?

From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night based on a y-novel, about a young man nursing a heartbreak who has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. This turned out to be a pulp that wasn’t half as good as it should have been and even less memorable, but not terrible. 5/10 DON'T BOTHER unless you're v bored

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 12 - Oh it is such a pulp: the acting is not good and the script is terrible. Of course, I’m mildly enjoying it. Very good dream kissing. There's something appealing about these main characters - I think it's the moot crushes. We rarely get to see that. These days everything feels very one sided, this... isn't.

A Secretly Love (Thai WeTV) - Khonprot, a third-year hazer of the engineering faculty, has a secret crush on Pluem, a tsundere fourth-year head hazer. Over the years, he's seen Pluem cycle through girlfriends. Recently, after a public breakup, however, Khonprot thinks maybe a boy has a chance.

I tried but I can't get into my WeTV account anymore and I'm way too lazy to figure it out. I'll catch it grey if I can, since I've rebooted the bootlegging side of my BL life for Cherry Magic anyway.

So this show may stay in this section, or I may bump it down to "it's airing but..."

If anyone is watching it, let me know if it's good?

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 7-8fin - Ugh it was GREAT, despite some pretty telling flaws. I ended up feeling like some of the filming was amateurish (very overworked low angles - director's first feature, I assume), and the narrative is a little disjoined and on the nose, AND the subs are clumsy (which I don't expect from KBL) BUT I still loved it. (FYI - I wouldn't be so harsh on a BL for this kinda thing except one from Korea.)

Quick pitch:

This isekai-based KBL is about a man who must win a game by convincing a reserved teen outcast to fall in love with him. Of course, that teen represents himself and his own unhappiness. Like many queer narratives, this show is actually about self worth, trust, and found family, and it is VERY on the nose. But I don’t expect subtlety from my BL and I enjoyed it's truly lovely redemption arc and earnest performances. While I found the narrative a touch disjointed with overworked filming angles and poorer than average captions, this is certainly much better than early KBL in terms of consistency of tone, script, and immersion. Highly rewatchable and charming, which counts for a lot. 9/10

Trigger warning for suicide depicted.

Perfect Propose (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 4 of 6 - Gosh, it’s so lovely. But I do just constantly want to give them both hugs. 

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Oh look, Taiwan has created yet another BL where I spend most of the time watching it grinning like an idiot. Surprise surprise. The pet name thing was fucking adorable. Also Taiwan once more proving they come by their "kings of kissing" title honestly. I mean to say. In a week of good kisses this one was just... WOW.

On the other hand, some of the underpinning themes are starting to v worry me (ownership, consent, age), and we only just got started, and I don't trust this production company so... I have concerns.

But also... YAY KISSES!

(I'm made of weak moral fiber.)

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - Like many other shows on this list. I just enjoy it the most when the two leads are on screen together. So this episode was kind of lacking because they were apart for most of it. I also am starting to agree with the tone of the plot, that maybe they ARE better off as friends not lovers. (And I'm sure I'm not supposed to want that.) Oh Japan, must you?

My Strawberry Film (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 8 - Oh it’s good. In the arthouse lane so don’t expect sweetness & light or an HEA. If there’s no cartoon aspect to a JBL, there’s usually no joy. But it is certainly good. Teens uncover some old film and a mystery around a pretty girl. The background music is wildly annoying (and rarely in the background). 

It's Done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam, it's on YouTube. I will give it a try when I have a window of time.

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - A Burmese BL? @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) - Gave me Luminous Solution vibes have decided not to watch.

It's Airing But...

Dead Friend Forever (Thai iQIYI) - rumors are it's interesting. I'm waiting to know how it ends.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - dropped it at ep 4.

Next Week Looks Like This:

2/24 Unknown (Taiwan Youku) 12 eps - Older brother tough guy breadwinner looks after his sister and defacto adopted little brother. Little bother falls in love with him and is sent away after a stolen kiss. But when he comes back…

Sam Lin has a cameo so even if I wasn't already excited, I'm in. We should be on our guard though, Taiwan will occasionally go edgy, dark, and sad... this could go there.

One assumes GMMTV is filling in the BL time slot with something queer on their YT Channel after Cooking Crush ends, they gonna lose subs if they don't. But I've not been paying attention to the chatter so I don't know which of their line-up it will be. I think G4 are filming/off radar now, and Earth is in that het noona thing? Plus they gotta sort out the IP for MIx-Up and Ossen. So it won't be one of the announced adaptations. They'll hold My Golden Blood for the high season, so I think it'll be one of the lesser known lead-outs. Wandee or Only Boo maybe? But they only just started filming those. Are we getting our long awaited GL? Anything else left from 2023 that I forgot about?

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Two crawling kisses from Thailand this week. Now this is a fetish I didn't know I had. Turns out, we love this one! (*waves hand in air* I speak for all of us now.)

Cooking Crush

City of Stars

Possibly the best tsundere to cinnamon roll pivot we've had in a long time.

Also the best asshole to KING pivot. Could we have a whole drama staring this character now? Please?

And finally our sunshine learning to love himself.

SIGH. what a lovely show.

And a good SMILEY kiss from a KBL.

And then some cute cuddles? Korea is spoiling me these days. I'm catching expectations now. What's next? Japan learns to kiss in their light BLs? Ha! I kill me.

(All Love for Love's Sake).

(Last week)

[katyspersonal]

Don't know if this was asked before but since it will soon me a year since its release, what are your thoughts on sote and radahn?

I've been rewatching jack play sote and I love everything about it but radahn, like I just can't put my finger on it (this isn't even about godwyn cause it's impossible for it to be him) it just kinda feels like (to me at least) I wish we got more about Miq and Radahn in base game to really build off the reveal, doesn't help that the final boss makes me want to throw my controller lol. I guess that's like the main thing bugging me about sote, everything else was really good. Would love to read your thoughts on this.

Yet again, I am very simple about the "no foreshadowing" situation, so it's time to pull out the Ol' Reliable:

(From this ( x ) interview)

I think that they've always wanted to make Radahn and Miquella an (involuntary) item but completely omitted the plot from the base game, with the exception of Aeonia Battle happening at all, because it would just be not worth it without the full ascension plot! Like how in base Bloodborne, Maria was not foreshadowed at all and was simply referred to as a nameless Old Hunter and a student of Gehrman. Because Doll being a grief ornament of Maria would just be not worth it without actually meeting her!

It was not just a callback to Lorian and Lothric either, because... well, Malenia and Miquella are actual callback to Lorian and Lothric. x) Younger sibling born so cursed that older one helps to lift their curse, and they basically exchange; Miquella's golden blood makes up 3.5 of Malenia's limbs, and he in turn also gets touched by the Scarlet Rot:

(Cleanrot Knight's wings reference by Youtuber Zullie the Witch ( x ))

Like, with SO much story and connection between Malenia and Miquella, there was no other reason to have it be Radahn unless they simply planned it to be Radahn from the start and now went "damn, we actually can bring it back now"! Like, yes, lolrandom ship but you go girl, as long as it is not forced fanservice (remember SVTFOE Starco nonsense to DIE instantly) I'll just accept it sooner or later! I remember it took some time to digest the PCR thing at first, but mostly because it was not a very good look for Malenia + Miquella felt like the type to embrace everyone, without picking favourite to me.

Miquella and Malenia being inspired by Radahn to aspire to be kinder and stronger respectively when they were young is also beliveable! Like, it fits into the story considering all characters and relationships, not to mention that Miquella carving his way to be compassionate and king is cooler than being "born good"! Besides, it means that Godwyn was not fit to inspire the twins to work on themselves, and what it means is that something was whack with the "perfect golden guy advertisement of how cool Erdtree is" underneath, even if he was still loved dearly. And I am all here for it! Radahn's inclusion is random without the foreshadowing, but getting him involved in the family drama even more than just the Aeonia Battle contributes, in my opinion! It offers interesting ideas, insights and interactions! "I like what I can do with this information" is the best way I can describe it.

Like, yes, they could have found a way to make PCR battle go in a more interesting way. Like it going wrong since Stage 2 because Radahn is using Mohg's body and it could break free and cause havoc and messed up mutations or something. The only flaw of the pair itself is literally lack of foreshadowing, and I already said that you just have to accept that Fromsoft does this thing consistently because their ideas never agree with their absurd deadlines xD

[onyx-archer]

So... Let's Talk About THAT

I want to start this by saying that I haven't purchased Double Exposure, and I have no plans on doing so because of what this post is about. I know very little about the game, but I do know about the Chloe stuff. That was the one thing I wanted to know about going into the game before I committed to a purchase. Not specifically because of a ship or whatever (though that's certainly a factor), but how they go about justifying Chloe not being in the Double Exposure.

I say that because I knew, based on the marketing for the game being as cagey as it is in regards to Chloe. I knew there'd be some kind of justification to not have her around, because how else are they going to make the game's story work with both endings being "respected." And that's the key word here: respect.

Normally, I'd at least abide by my spoiler policy, where I would mark spoilers for stuff that's super new for like, a month. However, because of what this entails, I really can't be nice enough to do that, as everything I've seen has genuinely made me go "how is this 'respecting' the player's choice from LiS1?!"

Under the cut, there will be spoilers for Life Is Strange as a series. As I write this sentence, I don't know how much I'll go into it, so be warned. I know Double Exposure isn't even fully out, but man, I have a lot to say about this ONE THING in it that has me annoyed to no end.

So... in Double Exposure, the one thing a lot of fans of the first game were wondering was "why is Chloe not in the game?" Some were hopeful that she would be, but realistically, there was no way that was possible without the game's budget being higher. At best, we'd get some new voice lines, but that's about it. Why? Because Deck Nine wanted to "respect" the ending of LiS1 for the players who chose the "Bay" ending. Chloe, in case y'all forgot, fucking DIES in that ending, so she'd, at best, get a cameo appearance in the game where Max returns unless it was decided that the game was set in a timeline where Chloe survived.

It is very clear to me from the jump that unless they made that choice, they'd not have Chloe be around. It was likely that they'd make it so the pair broke up in some capacity (be it as friends or lovers, it didn't really matter), and as much as I didn't want that aspect to be true, it ended up actually being the case. As a fan of Pricefield, this sucks, but as a person who understood from the start that the game would have to find a way to dodge the issue of Chloe in some capacity to tell the story Deck Nine wanted to tell, I could accept it. So long as the way they did so was respectful to the original vision of the characters in some capacity.

And because I'm writing this post at all, it's pretty obvious that isn't what happened.

I want to be perfectly clear when I say that the break up, conceptually, makes sense as a mechanism for a story about Max. In my mind, it would make sense that Max and Chloe's relationship would have some bumps caused by the sheer amount of trauma Max endured during the tail end of LiS1. Finding out that a person you looked up to (Jefferson) was a total psycho who was obsessed with you and likely would have tried something worse than just taking gross pictures of you would leave a person pretty fucking messed up for years. Add onto that the fact that she basically had to do the trolly problem in real life, with the choices being her hometown and it's entire population... or a person she loves so much she couldn't imagine living without them (be it as a friend, or as more than that)... and you'd probably have a therapy bill the size of the Olympus Mons before you started feeling "relatively normal" again.

In a world where the people who were writing the game were better at their jobs, at least in this capacity, they'd look at that, and see how it'd affect a relationship. Max being unable to properly move on, with the only person she can reliably talk to about it being someone she very much wouldn't want to trauma dump on (since you can't exactly tell a shrink that you had time travelled so much that you caused a titanic sized waterspout to level an entire costal town without getting institutionalized), given that said person is likely grappling with a lot of shit themselves (survivor's guilt, for one)... yeah a break up of some kind, even if only a temporary one, is kind of inevitable. Time apart might be something you both need to properly heal.

This would also allow the story to at least try to deal with Max's trauma in a way that is comparable in scope based on both decisions, and it would make sense. If Max were the one to break off the relationship, citing a need to have some time apart to get her head on straight (metaphorically speaking, we all know she ain't straight), it'd make sense that said choice could blow up in her face and leave her a bit emotionally frazzled. Chloe is a person who very obvious abandonment issues, so a decision like that from Max, even if it was only for a while, would likely lead to a much more stressful situation, regardless of how close they are.

This, in turn, would allow the "Bay" ending to be about Max not being able to get over her choice to functionally kill her own best friend, and all of the things she never got to say. The grief being something she struggles with for a decade (or however long it is between LiS1 and DE) would make sense. It'd be in character. Max is a character who is indecisive, and is prone to fussing over mistakes she feels she makes, especially with Chloe. She buries those kinds of feelings in a box until she's forced to confront them. Then she tries to over compensate for her shortcomings. We know she does this because she immediately jumps to help Chloe look for Rachel at the first real chance she gets as a way for her to at least sort of make up for the 5 years of basically no contact. Yeah, there are other reasons she does this, but it can be pretty easily inferred that Max, since Max's whole power allows her to go back in time, which is, in theory, the ultimate way to fix your past mistakes.

I'd be fine if the breakup was purely Max running from a problem she doesn't want to properly deal with. With her being reminded of her choice that killed hundreds of people for one person, even if that person means everything to her. Some people crumple under less, and Max is very much an insecure person, so she'd crumple like a wet napkin eventually.

They could have very easily made a core part of the game Max learning to let go of that part of her past, to finally make peace with her choice. You could even have it be a case where her powers leave her for good, with some kind of, I dunno, storm of butterflies (which I feel could very easily serve as a symbol of Max connection to Chloe, and not as just a symbol for Chloe exclusively). Regardless of the Bae or Bay choice, having her powers literally fly away would also be a way of saying that she's finally "grown up," and that her burdens have been eased, with them flying away with her powers. The guilt? Yeah, there'd always be a little, that shit never goes away, but she'd no longer wallow in it. The trauma? She'd be able to accept it as a thing that happened, and move on in a more healthy way.

If Chloe and her were a couple, maybe she'd end the game with a phone call, reaching out to Chloe in an effort to repair their relationship, to say that she's "done living in the past." She could literally say something like "I'm done rewinding, I'm just going to look to the future, and leave the past where it is." We'd probably all cheer at that kind of sappy bullshit. It'd be sapphic as hell, and it'd be awesome.

But no. That's too nice a thought. Deck Nine had other plans.

In the game, as it is now, there is a distinct problem with the breakup working, and that's the way it happens. In Double Exposure (at least up to Episode 2, as that's all that's currently available), the game is quick to brush aside the idea that Max and Chloe were ever really a thing, and wants the player to go right into being interested in having Max romance the New characters that Deck Nine made for the game! Why'd they break up? Because Chloe is afraid that Max is using her rewind powers (which she supposedly hasn't since Blackwell), and that, because of those powers, she's always going to be living in the past. That she, Chloe fucking Price, just wants to be a free spirit and live for the future, and that, "as much as it hurts," that might be a future without Max in it.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

Chloe Price, the bony sack of trauma, cigarette smoke, and well documented abandonment issues, is the one breaking off a relationship? Are you serious? You gotta be fucking with me Deck Nine! You wrote a whole ass game about this character, and my opinion of that game aside (I think Before the Storm is dogshit btw), you still miss one of the core aspects of Chloe's whole character? How do you miss the point by this much?

And then... a self-proclaimed former staff member at Deck Nine spoke up on Reddit... said some stuff, and it all started to make sense.

See, Deck Nine has, at least somewhat recently, come under fire for their dogshit working conditions. There were several articles showcasing how toxic that place was to work for a number of reasons by several publications. The writing was on the wall, but a lot of people, myself included, tried to not see it, and just be hopeful for a new LiS game. While I really don't like BtS, I very much enjoyed True Colors, so I was at least a little optimistic.

However, if that supposed former employee is to be believed in any capacity (we can at least say they likely are a former employee, as another former employee basically called them out on Twitter for trying to start a hate brigade... even though they didn't), then Double Exposure was doomed from the start. The creative leads on the project, allegedly, HATE Chloe, and would shoot down ideas that would be more respectful of her in All Hands On Deck (Nine) meetings, even though they asked for ideas due to how they wrote themselves into a bloody corner whilst working on the game the way they did.

Then there's the fact that supposedly some people at the publisher dislike Chloe because they feel that Ashly Burch shit on Before the Storm post-launch (which she didn't, btw), despite her working on a game that replaced her voice with another actress due to a strike. They hired a "scab" to voice the characters, and that might have upset Ashly, a union member. Fair enough. But apparently some people didn't like Rhianna DeVries, which the publisher heard, and said "don't bring her back for any big appearances" or something? So they aren't going to recast again, they aren't going to bring back Ashly for petty reasons, and they aren't going to even bring Rhianna back again (she had a small voice role in True Color's Wavelengths DLC), even though most people are fine with her? Hell, I think she's a damn highlight in the cast for BtS, and I hate that game.

Then I got to thinking: is there evidence that Deck Nine hates Chloe, despite working on Before the Storm? Short answer: I think so, yeah. Long answer? Well...

One thing that is notable about Before the Storm, at least from my perspective, is that said game did a pretty middling job with characters that were introduced in the original game, despite being a prequel. Nathan is nothing like how he is in LiS1, nor is David. Rachel doesn't even remotely come off as the kind of character that people would talk about the way they do in LiS1 after she goes missing (what with her being a big Laura Palmer parallel and all). Fuck, they made Victoria willing to roofie someone to get ahead, which a lot of people called out as tone deaf as hell given what happens to her in LiS1.

But in that same breath, the game introduces a handful of new, Deck Nine original characters, and that's clearly where the effort was. Some were better than others, of course, Samantha was largely pointless and amounted to nothing, Rachel's Parents are just not well written, and Damon is such a bland attempt at a villain... Don't even get me started on the Elliot Rogers looking ass character that shares a first name with that whackjob.

But you wanna know who Deck Nine really likes? Steph Gingrich. And you know what, so do I. I like Steph a lot. She's like, the best thing to come out of that game. But when you pull back and analyze who Steph is, something notable stands out: she's basically Deck Nine's take on "what if Chloe wasn't a bitchy bitch?"

Think about it: Steph is a queer girl wearing a beanie (Chloe's basic aesthetic), enjoys nerdy stuff and Blade Runner (Chloe, even before joining their D&D sessions, was a closet weeb back before she lost her dad), is into punk rock (so much so that she forms a punk band, Drugstore Makeup, with a former girlfriend), likes to smoke weed (to be fair, a lot of characters in LiS do), and even gets a healthy dose of trauma from the storm killing her own mom, or losing two very close friends, one of which is the same person Chloe lost (this is more a Max parallel, but you get it). She even has a pretty distinct "voice" in how she talks that most people can pick out of a crowd pretty easily (which, to be fair, isn't hard, since True Colors has a very muted cast in this respect). Hell, she can even romantically end up with a bisexual with super powers! She's literally just "what if Chloe was more of a nerd and less of an asshole."

This isn't to shit on Steph at all, again, I love Steph, she's great. I'm not even mad about the obvious parallels between her and Chloe. They were friends, of course aspects of them are going to be similar. But when you take those things into consideration when reading that Deck Nine supposedly hates Chloe... and you see how hard the series has pushed Steph (Steph has her own DLC story, a full ass novel about stuff she did between her two appearances, and a comic where she and Alex act as the cool lesbian surrogate parents to a runaway girl with powers), you can sort of pick up on some subliminal parallels. It's hard not to when Deck Nine has a clear bias for a character they made, and how they dislike a character they didn't, despite the overlap.

I could just be reaching, but when I put the pieces in front of me in the context of "Deck Nine hates Chloe" it just adds up. It's kind of hard not to think Deck Nine does hate Chloe, given that before we even find out the specifics of the break up, they have Safi ask Max if she's interested in the new female love interest the devs cooked up immediately after Max tries to basically shut down the conversation about why she and Chloe broke up. Even in the context of Chloe dying, it's clear what they're doing here, and it's not even remotely subtle.

Even if a lot of this is just bullshit, it's clear that Deck Nine had no real intention of "respecting" anything. Why? Because Double Exposure very clearly wants to operate under the pretense that you chose to Sacrifice Chloe. It's the only way the game really works in anyway that's even remotely "respectful" to any fans. The fact that they rejected the premise of DE being set in a timeline where Chloe was definitively DEAD, even though members of the team suggested that should be how they approached this game's story, says that they had no real intention of respecting the integrity of the choice LiS1 players made. Regardless of the reasons why they did this, respect is NOT one of those reasons. They had a story they wanted to tell, but forced themselves to try and fit the square peg into the round hole.

This game already decided to not respect the original creators at Don't Nod by having it be about Max, when they said Max and Chloe's stories were "done." I get it, that's a decision they likely didn't make themselves... but they could have at least tried harder to respect the characters they were given to make a story about a little more.

For all I know, the remaining 3 Episodes of Double Exposure may allow the player to have Max and Chloe reconcile at the end if you don't romance any of the new characters. Maybe that's an ending, and I'm mad for basically just bad writing... but I nevertheless won't be supporting this game with my money as things currently stand.

[dessarious]

What Makes a Family? Pt27

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Marinette walked down the stairs to find Cass scowling at Bruce and signing rapidly. Selina was whispering with her Maman, who looked far too amused, so Cass had to be laying into him pretty hard. Damian was looking on in confusion, but the other boys were nodding along with whatever her twin was saying. She really needed to have Cass teach her to sign. Chloe appeared next to her.

"I'm actually learning new terms. You sister is extremely creative with swearing." Of course, that would be what impressed Chloe. Mari had to wonder how much of it was just not knowing common terms, so she made up her own.

"I don't want to mess up her relationship with him." Chloe scoffed.

"Given the way the others are reacting, this isn't the first, or worst, of his overstepping. I'm thinking this is a long overdue rant."

"You did what when I was with Babs?" Dick's indignant shout startled most of the room. "Yeah, I'm never bringing anyone home ever again. Not unless I've been married for two years." Mari sent Chloe a questioning glance.

"Trust me, you don't want to know." Yeah, if Chloe was saying that... she really didn't want to know.

"You've never known when to butt out, old man. The difference this time is that you don't have any right to butt in in the first place." Jason's tone was downright hostile.

"She's my daughter."

"A biological connection doesn't mean you own me. I'll be eighteen in three months anyway and I'm completely financially independent, so if you want any type of relationship with me, it's going to be on my terms, Mr. Wayne. Those terms will include not interfering in my relationships with others, romantic or otherwise, and not telling me how I'm allowed to live my life." He looked like he was going to argue, but Cass signed at him before standing beside Mari. He looked at the boys for help, but the only one not glaring at him was Damian.

"Marinette, you're young. You have no idea the danger-"

"Do not pretend you know anything about me or my life, let alone what I do and do not know. I assure you, I know what I'm doing, and Luka and Kagami are not a threat or a problem. If you can't accept that, then you can leave." She hadn't wanted to get to this point so soon, especially since it put Cass's ability to stay in question. Unfortunately, she also wasn't willing to set a precedent with him by letting him think he could act this way with her. She'd been around enough powerful people to know that if she didn't set boundaries now, she'd never be able to enforce them. Jagged was proof of that.

"Perhaps we should discuss this privately." No way was that happening. She could almost see the hero lecture waiting to burst out of him.

"After what you just tried to pull, and your apparent history of browbeating your kids into things, we're not about to let that happen." Tom's voice was harder than she'd ever heard it. "If you won't respect my daughter's boundaries, you'll be asked to leave." The emphasis he put on 'my daughter' caused Bruce to flinch. She would feel worse about it if not for the fact that all her siblings, besides Damian, seemed to approve of it.

"I think we should separate for the time being, and try this again later. Tempers are high, so we all need space to calm down." Sabine sounded cheerful enough, but there was a hard edge to her words that everyone caught. As much as Mari thought it was a good idea, they were in a bit of a time crunch.

"Given that they're only going to be here for a week, it might be best to get things settled. But, if Bruce isn't willing to compromise, there's not much point in continuing this discussion." She could hear how tired she sounded and given the concerned looks at her and glares at Bruce, everyone else could, too.

"By compromise you mean letting you decide everything." The sulkiness in Bruce's voice made her roll her eyes. Yes, this had to suck for him, but he couldn't honestly expect her to let him just take over her life.

"No, but there are going to be things that aren't negotiable. I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, and I'd appreciate the same courtesy. We know next to nothing about eachother, and until we do it's not really fair to have an opinion on each other's lives." He didn't seem to know what to do with that. She was sure that, for a man used to being in charge, it wasn't something he had experience with. "I want to get to know you, all of you, but I'm not going to change who I am or how I live my life to do it. If you can't accept that, you can leave."

Cass hugged her from behind, and Mari could feel her twin glaring at Bruce. As much as she had hoped it wouldn't be necessary, it was obvious who Cass would side with in this. Of the boys, Jason seemed firmly entrenched on her side, Dick and Tim were more of a neutral, and Damian just seemed confused, but he'd most likely side with Bruce for the time being. Hopefully, it wouldn't destroy her chance of getting to know him permanently. When it became obvious Bruce either couldn't or wouldn't back down, Selina went over to start whispering in his ear. Alfred had been scarily silent through everything, and Mari really wasn't certain what to make of it.

"You need my help." Selina rolled her eyes, and Alfred just shook his head. The man really needed to learn when to back down.

"I need Cass. That's it." He flinched, and even the boys were trading looks. Bruce was closing off. She could see it. "I need to show Cass her new school. Why don't you take the evening to think things over? We can try this again tomorrow when everyone is calmer." Bruce looked about ready to explode.

"That sounds like a good idea. Master Bruce, we should head back to the hotel." The glare Bruce sent Alfred didn't phase the man at all. The stern look he sent back had the boys looking like they were ready to wet themselves.

"Fine." Bruce signed something at Cass and she felt her twin stiffen up behind her. Chloe looked like she was about to start screaming at him, too.

"Miss Cassandra will be staying with Miss Marinette. Indefinately." Alfred's tone was frigid and just about everyone seemed to be cowering or eyeing the man like he was going to explode. Even Bruce hunched in on himself a tiny bit. "Now we really should be on our way."

Mari had a feeling Alfred was going to be having a long conversation with Bruce. She just hoped it had the desired outcome. The man obviously had control issues, and she couldn't afford to have him try to take over her life. She had a feeling she was already going to have a major issue with Batman trying to step on her toes once he actually went through an Akuma attack. She couldn't count on there not being one before he and the others went home. Not to mention, if she'd heard right, he could just use some tech the Justice League had to teleport back at any time. She'd have to ask Cass about that, too.

Selina practically pushed Bruce out the door, while the boys followed under Alfred's gaze. Before going joining the rest, Jason shoved a piece of paper in her hand with a wink. She had a feeling he was one brother she could count on not to run to Bruce with information.

Once they were all out of the door, Mari felt herself relax. She felt terrible that things had gone downhill so quickly, but there really wasn't another option at this point. She couldn't afford to show weakness. There was far too much at stake, both in her personal life and as a hero. Cass tightened her hold on Mari.

"He needs time. He'll calm down."

"Unfortunately, time isn't something we have right now. If this doesn't get better, I'm going to have to force him to leave Paris before Hawkmoth is back in fighting form." She didn't even want to think about how much that would piss him off. She had a feeling Batman's ego wouldn't take too well to being thrown out of a city by another hero. Alfred and Selina would take her side... at least she thought so.

"Alfred will make things right." She wasn't quite sure what Cass meant by that, but she hoped she was right. She opened the paper that Jason handed her and heard Cass giggle behind her.

If you need someone to help you hassle B, give me a shout. ~Jason

It had five phone numbers on it. If she didn't know his 'occupation', it would seem excessive. It did mean she had at least one of her brothers on her side when it came to Bruce though. Whether that was a good thing or not was yet to be determined.

"Why don't we head over to the school? There are a few clubs meeting, so I know the building is open. That way, you can get a feel for the layout before tomorrow." She knew it would stress Cass out if they didn't scope out the building. It was going to be bad enough being around so many new people.

"You don't want to eat first?" Given the looks her Maman was shooting at the door, she was more worried about them running into Bruce than the actual food, but it was a good idea anyway.

"Of course, Maman. We wouldn't want it to go to waste." Especially since she made enough to feed the whole city again. Maybe she should text Jason and see if he wanted to meet them at the school and they could bring him some. "Maybe we could take some to go as well. I wanted to show Cass the houseboat, and if it's late enough, we might stay there." It wasn't a lie, just not the whole truth.

"Probably a good idea. It'll give your father and I time to talk to Bruce should he decide to come looking for you." She really hoped he didn't. Her Maman might actually kill him. She would text Selina or Alfred to make sure he didn't come over, but she had a feeling that would have the opposite effect she was looking for. After they ate and while her Maman was boxing up food, her Papa motioned her out into the hallway.

"What's wrong?" She heard the panic in her own voice and her Papa winced.

"Nothing's wrong. I didn't mean to worry you. I just wanted to make sure you were handling everything alright. I know things have been tense, and you tend to overthink everything without letting anyone know." She leaned forward slightly, and that's all it took for him to envelop her in a hug. Her Papa gave the best hugs.

"What if he makes her go back?" She knew it was an irrational thought, but it wouldn't go away. Her Papa hugged her tighter.

"That's not going to happen. We won't let it, and more importantly, Cass won't let it. I truly don't believe there's a force strong enough to separate the two of you. And if there is, Plagg will get rid of it." Marinette started giggling and couldn't stop. It was a little disturbing that she found the image of Plagg getting rid or Bruce amusing, but she was willing to chalk it up to stress.

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[daily-vee]

"Question 1: Is this a waste of my. time? Probably."

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Welcome !

This is a Daily-Vee blog, where I basically post daily Vee art posts (Art made by me !) as much as I can !

Before interacting, I would appreciate you reading this post first.

First of all, I DO NOT SUPPORT BLUSHCRUNCH STUDIO ! I am aware of the allegations and what the developers did. Yes, I know Rox has been fired, however Qwel from what I know has also done some bad things and defended Rox. If you wanna know what they did, I recommend reading this document about the situation.

I have heard from people saying she was lied to and manipulated by Rox however, unless there is proof about that- i don't quite believe what Qwel said. It felt more of an excuse to me instead and her behaviour to me is just very iffy and suspicious- im sorry, but I don't feel comfortable supporting Qwel

[^ Many people ended up asking me this question, which is why i added it here]

I don't support them, however I still enjoy the game and the characters, which is why I made this blog. I would appreciate it though to not make requests related to the situation ! I wanna keep this blog fun, silly and peaceful as well :D

I will be doing an order on how I post- on even days (2, 4, 6, 8...), i'll be drawing a request someone sent ! However on odd days (1, 3, 5, 7...), i'll be drawing my own ideas ! It's just to keep an order on how i post so i can do your guys' requests but also be able to draw my own ideas :D however, if there are no requests i can find on a even day, i'll just instead draw an idea my own

If someone ends up requesting an idea I already had planned to draw before, their request can be done on an odd day. The reason why is because it still was my idea, someone just ended up requesting the same idea i had so, it's best i take the chance to respond to their request as well :]

About the requests- you can send an ask requesting what you want me to draw with Vee, which, your request can be done for one of the days I post here ! here's a couple of rules though :

- The request HAS to be related to Vee. If your request isn't related to Vee, it will be ignored.

- Keep your requests respectful ! I will not accept any request that is hateful or discriminates against someone ! (By that, I mean that I wont do requests that have something like hating on gay and/or trans people, discriminating another race, etc...)

- No NSFW requests. I am not going to draw those kinds of things. The only kind of "NSFW" i'll draw is gore/blood- more specifically, the twisteds in the game. (Im not sure if it really counts as gore/blood? I'm just saying it just in case someone gets confused) Other than that, the rest NSFW things are a huge no-no for me

- Ship requests are allowed ! Well, mostly- I'll draw any kind of ships, whether it be romantic or platonic ! However, there MAY be a chance I can get uncomfortable with the ship you send. A small one though. If I do get uncomfortable, I'll likely not do your request. If you do a ship request, please specify whether it is platonic or romantic! Or else i'll just randomly pick !

Currently, the only ships I won't do/feature due to them making me uncomfortable are these :

Toodles x Vee/anyone (Platonic is allowed, reason why I won't do romantic is because Toodles is a child.)

Pebbles x Vee/anyone (Platonic is allowed, reason why I won't do romantic is because Pebbles is a dog)

Dandy x Vee (Reason why is because Vee seems to hate Dandy which- can't blame her tbh...also, Dandy seems to dislike Vee as well)

Goob x Scraps (Platonic is allowed, reason why I won't do romantic is because they're siblings.)

(There may be more ships added here in the future, I know there can be a ton of different ships that I may not even have thought about before. Just saying this just in case!)

- Remember that I won't do every request ! I'll likely do the ones that I find interesting or ones I like.

- That's mostly all ! Just have fun requesting :D

Also, another thing- please do not repost my art without permission. Please ask me first !

And- just a little warning...I may not be able to post everyday! I will indeed try but- there will be likely I am going to miss some days due to me being busy !

This is all I have to say for now ! This introduction post will likely get updated on the future to add more information that I feel like I missed or forgot to put

Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy having a daily dose of Vee ! :3

[Updated on : 11/12/2024]

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｡𖦹°‧⋆౨˚⟡˖ ☆ﾟ.*･ ｡ﾟ✮⋆˙⊹₊⟡⋆✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆°°✩

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[swiiivet-screamathon]

"Haha, Strawberry Crepe? Are you in here?"

"Hm? Pure Vanilla? Whad'ya want?"

"Ah, no particular reason, nothing inconspicuous, of course."

"Ah, right-- well, don't touch anything; have zero interest cleaning up other cookies' messes today."

"I'll do my best. What are you working on?"

"Someone actually came for me for some upgrades, its been so long I thought everyone had forgotten I could do that. So I want no distractions from that."

"Oho? Could I be curious on who wanted what?"

"Anything to help them sleep better and quicker, wanted to be out on the field as fast as possible-- capsule sounds easy peasy to me."

"Really? Its that easy with no negative side effects? Sleep is important you know."

"I don't assume this guy is particularly fussed about the negatives of sleeping for short amount of times. If no one fights you over it adjusting a cookies circuitry isn't that hard either, but it might make jellies taste weird."

"I think there might be some negative side effects that simply aren't being considered due to the character of the cookie, am I right?"

"He told me he wouldn't blame me for anything if he started feeling ill, not like he would anyways I'm not that careless with my contraptions, so for all I care anything could happen to him."

"If anything does make sure to tell me about it alright? I don't want any cookie suffering under my nose."

"Yeah, yeah, can't keep my workshop if I use it for evil. My memory works just fine."

"Speaking of no one in particular, how is it working with Espresso?"

"I didn't expect someone composed of his ingredients to respect the craft as much as he does, so he's fine. Spends most of his time working on the candies though so he's carved out his own space over there to work on it. As long as he doesn't randomly explode anything I don't have any issues with it, which fortunately he hasn't yet. It'd be nice if someone who spent so much time in my workshop cared about the wafflebots but it's not like he's causing any fights with them either."

"He can't read your mind you know, if you want him more involved you're going to have to communicate that."

"No, no-- Dragging someone who doesn't inherently care is no one to bother with, he stays over with his candies I stay over here with my stuff."

"As long as you're aware of that choice. Have you done that for him though; helped him at all with his candies?"

"Duh, he might be shockingly respectful despite his ingredients but he is characteristically frantic, he'll run around in a mad craze if anything takes longer than expected and I get put on babysitting duty whilst he grabs some solution from who knows where."

"Are you alright with that arrangement?"

"Its not that bad and it could be worse, if it means we get candies at all I guess it's a sacrifice worth making."

"Would you like an extra pair of hands to help out...?"

"Again? Unless you found some new cookie since the last time you brought that up--- ah, wait, right. I'm gonna have to think about that one, its quite the commitment."

"Take the time you need, I want to assure that it was just a passing thought, don't feel burdened to accept if you have any doubts."

"As always..."

"I think I should be returning to my duties, it was nice catching up with you though. Hope I didn't distract you too much."

"... It's not that hard to multitask when it comes to you, don't have to keep a close eye on you."

"The highest compliment one can get from you, haha. Have a good evening Crepe."

...

"I guess only one of you are actually leaving tonight."

[yuri-is-online]

I really love Sebek and Epel and Deuce

Sebek's Yutu would be a tad hilarious but also kinda sad because his dad MAY OR MAY NOT BE ALIVE because man

Malleus :(

Epel's Yutu tho......

I saw a fic where Epel can use a gun (mentioned in passing) so I'm imagining that while Epel's Yutu is a great farmer just like his dad

He's also got a rifle :)

You have given me a vision... the one thing Epel! Yutu wants... is to be a cowboy. Can you picture a baby who looks a lot like Epel with a little cowboy hat and boots, he'd be so cute. Also, I was having brain rot and decided to introduce one of the friends lovely @archetypal-archivist helped create for Yutu! Please check out their Azul! Yutu posting it's very good and I love it sososo much. Unfortunately this post does not feature Epel riding on a horse, I'll have to fix that sometime. And get back to Sebek later.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, context on the fyuuture kid au can be found here and here. For more fyuutre kid au, please check out the series section of my masterlist.

Yutu's earliest memory is of apples.

His parent had him in a sling as they worked, picking and packing the fruit as they softly hummed a lullaby to soothe his grumpy mood. He never was able to get over how big an orchard could be, even when he was old enough to walk under the trees and play with the other workers children something about that sea of greenery just felt magical. Like if he really focused the outside world would cease to be and he could wake up in a land of nothing but him, Yuu, and the acceptance you can only ever find in nature.

But that's not how things ever went. When he opened his eyes Yuu would pack him up and they would move to follow the harvest until the winters shut things down and it was back to that god awful place Yuu had been born in. He was glad to move away when Yuu found them a permanent place to stay when he turned 10, gladder still for it to be a farm even if it didn't have the orchards he loved so much. The old couple that hired Yuu on were impressed with how deeply the single parent cared for their son, and how eager the son was to to help his parent. It was the perfect set up for an ideal, if difficult, childhood that would nurture Yutu in to a strong young man.

But this isn't the happy family future, it's the bad one. And things were always going to go wrong sooner rather than later.

Mixing things up from the other posts, Yuu feels particularly drawn to farms and farm work when thinking about Yutu's father and ends up crisscrossing their country as a migrant farm worker until they're offered a full time position as a farm hand they happily accept in the hopes of stabilizing Yutu's education. Yutu genuinely loved his childhood and grew up having a deep respect for manual labor and agriculture. He assumes Yuu must have met his father while traveling and had a brief relationship that produced him, but accepts that whatever accident caused Yuu's memory loss will keep him from ever really knowing if that was the case. Yuu impresses on him that his dad was a hard worker with a bit of a temper who never backed down from a challenge. They tease him that he gets his "cute" side from his Pappa, which Yutu likes about as much as Epel probably would.

He's doing his time in the short king mines, Yutu won't hit his growth spurt until around 17 and how tall he gets is from that is up to you, but if he stays short just know he is not happy about it at all. Unless someone brings up the fact he could probably have a career as a professional jockey and then he will maybe think about it as being a blessing. Maybe. Yutu learned to ride pretty early on in life and he loves doing it, but he doesn't really want to race horses. He'd much rather be a cowboy with his own little farm and a family of his own with a big orchard to tend to. He's got big dreams of one day being able to introduce his partner to Yuu and give them a nice place to retire to.

Plays outside by himself a lot. There are some kids at school he befriends, but a lot of their parents are wary about letting their kids hang out with him at his house. Yuu is seen as a bit weird, even if the old couple they work for is well liked most people in town know their kids who really dislike Yuu and Yutu for reasons that escape Yutu but his parent seems to understand. "They think they're protecting their parents." As Yutu grows he thinks it has to be more about money, he and Yuu love working the farm but their kids all have different jobs they got college degrees for so they probably want to sell the land when their parents die. He's right about that last bit of course, and willing to let Yuu give them some charity but he doesn't think they care about their parents near as much as he cares about his. Otherwise they'd at least be nice to someone their parents considered part of the family and not ship their mom off to a nursing home before their dad was even in the ground. Or evict the outcasts they considered part of the family too.

You have no idea what to do as you pack up your few belongings, Yutu can tell that you are stressed and it makes him mad. He tries to focus on helping, taping things up and dragging them out to the beat up car as you listlessly stare at the kitchen sink. After he moves the second box he notices you're not packing anymore and goes to check what's wrong and his instincts begin screaming something's wrong. Your eyes are unfocused, staring down at a framed picture he remembers well.

"Do you ever think about how all of this is my fault?" You sound a world a way and Yutu guesses that you are, the photo of a younger you with a toddler him in a sling under the apple orchards stares back at you both questioning just where is it you plan to go from here. It can't be back on the open road, school is about to start and the entire point of staying here was to make things better for him. Yutu is about to ask you the same thing when he hears the wind pick up, and is that a carriage he hears? "If I hadn't forgotten you, then maybe I could have found a way back..."

"What in the goddamn-" Yutu is cut off by the glass being blown out and he dives on instinct to cover you as the world spins around him.

"I'm real sorry Epel, you don't have to forgive me but... even after all this time. I still love you... I still love you and how sad is that..."

Good news, Yutu doesn't have to sleep and a shitty motel tonight. Bad news, he's in the middle of some fancy private school shit and his parent is flat lining on their floor. He starts screaming bloody murder until Crewel comes and scoops him up and ushers him off to the hospital wing where they have a very tense conversation. Yes, he does belong here actually he was supposed to have been born in this world with it's magic, monsters, and annoying private school uniforms he finds himself shoved into and marched back out to that fuck ass mirror to hear what dormitory he belongs in. The fuck is a Pom-e-fee-or and why does that girl with the 2000s throwback hairstyle look like she wants to kill him for asking that?

That girl is the Vice Warden of his new house and she absolutely hates him on sight. Like, she's heard about Epel before, duh who hasn't? He performed in the VDC with the Vil Schoenheit and he had like a fun Magicam account where he promoted his family's apple farm. Didn't Yuu tell him anything about that? Ugh guess she'll have to do it and hey why is hE RUNNING AWAY DOES ELEGANCE MEAN NOTHING TO YOU?!?!?! WHERE IS YOUR POMEFIORE DIGNITY YUTU DON'T THINK SHE CAN'T CATCH YOU BECAUSE SHE'S GOT HEELS ON BITCH!!!

It's exactly where Epel's Pome Pride was when he first joined to dorm, down a drain someplace because Yutu thinks his dorm is the pits. Growing up like he did made him starkly aware of just how different people with money see people like him and instilled a deep hatred of people who make their personality their skincare routine. He thinks the way rich people spend their money is boring and hates that his dorm mates are spending their precious time in a literal apocalypse doing their make up and hair. His Vice Warden is irritated with him and asks what he does then when he can't control the circumstances around him and Yutu goes to snap back at her but finds he doesn't really have an answer.

"Have you even tried taking care of yourself before?" Peyton is looking over his hair in genuine disgust, it's different than the resting bitch face she usually has. Yutu has seen enough of both to be able to tell the difference now.

"I mean I don't not take care of it." Because Yuu had tried to get him to do things like a skincare routine before, and come to think of it they had phrased the reasoning much like Peyton is now. Take good care of yourself. His Vice Warden rolls her eyes and turns towards her vanity, the amount of homemade products and their labels immediately tells him they aren't all for her hair type.

"Yeah but you don't do it well. Look I'm not crazy about bougie stuff either but like, you just feel so much better when you put the effort into yourself and not what other people say about you." She hesitates before meeting his eyes in the mirror and adding. "Trust me, I'd know." And Yutu believes her.

It has got to be hard being a vocaloid stan in a dorm with a literal ballroom.

Yutu really does belong in Pomefiore. He's great with alchemy and magical plants, just like his dad Crewel is all to happy to tell him. They talk a bit about his dad and the situation in the Shaftlands, how no one has heard from Epel since the blot took over and it's insanely difficult to get anywhere near there since the Phantom Hunter makes your life a living hell if you try. Most people think he's dead, but Crewel isn't so sure. He thinks that the various communities across Mt. Moln could easily sustain themselves if they barricaded against the blot monsters, but they also don't have a lot of mages so actually defending themselves could be difficult. Then again this does mean that the stronger phantoms would be less interested, so who knows. In the climate of the day though it is probably best to brace for the worst.

The sports clubs still exist in a less intense manner than before to give people different ways to relax and things to do. Since Yutu loves horses he tried the equestrian club out before deciding it was way too "fussy" and settling in to the board game club since he never really had enough friends to actually play them with before. It's a lot of fun to compare all the ways these games are similar to ones he knows about from Yuu's world and yet completely different. It helps nurse his sadness over losing Yuu since they were the only one who ever played these sorts of games with him and he has fond memories of how they totally never let him win.

He takes a great deal of comfort in knowing his dad had similar struggles with his dorm placement and is overjoyed to learn about the family farm! He wishes he was there right now and drives Peyton absolutely bonkers telling her all about the tests he's run on the soil around campus, how he thinks blot might effect plant growth, and the ways he can think of to combat it. She's crying please just go talk to the Ignyhide kids they totally care about that stuff probably! His lectures end up being useful when they're finally unable to avoid going out on missions any longer as understanding the signs of heavy pollution makes the stronger phantoms easier to track.

It's a realization Epel has also had, secluded in his little village as he is. Harveston has heavily fortified it's position and bulked up it's population with the survivors of other surrounding communities. They have been gifted the ability to endure, but Epel doesn't know if their community will survive long term unless the phantoms are dealt with. The surviving members of his family from the Queendom told awful stories when they retreated here, if that's what's going on in the rest of the world he imagines S.T.Y.X. is probably involved so he tries to keep his eyes peeled for anything like their tech. He manages to find a busted drone in the snow one day and brings it home to work on it whenever he gets a spare moment. It helps him ignore his grief over losing Yuu, his child, and contact with all of his friends. When he's focused on not breaking the drone further, he can convince himself he's either worked through that already or that once he fixes it he will have everyone he lost back at home with him where they belong.

Unit 7954 cackles back to life with a stream of what sounds like a stream of curse words, but Idia has certainly never heard any of them before. He knows that joyful cackle though and he thinks he must have stayed up too long again because he as to be hallucinating. There is no way he's actually looking at Epel, but the whooping before he shyly calms himself down reassures him he is. The two frantically talk about the situation in the Shaftlands and the number of survivors before Idia smacks himself and remembers to mention Yutu's existence. Epel falls off his chair in surprise at the news and Idia is worried he's killed the man before he hears his sobbing. Breaking through the front lines of the Fairest Queen might be impossible, but a video call now that Epel has fixed the drone isn't and Ortho is nice enough to set one up.

"Sevens yer big." Yutu feels like he's 10 feet tall when he hears the drawl of his father's voice. "Bigger than I was at yer age I reckon." The man is certainly taller than him, with lavender waves he's tied neatly back to let him see better under his thick winter clothing. His smile is so warm and friendly Yutu wishes he could dive through the screen and be there with him right this instant. "'s ok if ya don't know where to start with the questions, I bet you got a bunch."

"Why'd you marry Yuu?" It's not what he expected to ask first. He wanted to talk about school, or ask something practical like tips about finding his unique magic or fighting monsters. But that was what he really wanted to know wasn't it? Why Yuu was so important, if he was important to this man and his different accent even after all these years. And the happy smile that relaxes his father screams that he is, it's as if he's shed years of stress and suffering just thinking about his parent.

"Be easier to list the reasons I didn't like them since there aren't any." Epel closes his eyes and thinks about that first moment he realized how much he liked you, tucked away studying in the library and bickering about how to do an assignment as he wondered why you were even there and if you thought he was cool at all. "Since Yuu was from another world a lot of us felt like they deserved a good home here, but that just meant I wanted to invite them over for the summer and stuff like that. Didn't mean I wanted to spend the rest of my life with them, that's what I thought at first anyway. But well, you know Yuu pretty well. They always somehow know where the good lies in even the worst of people. Or at least they knew where it was in me and made sure to believe in it right up until the last day I saw them." They both quiet at the thought of that, Yutu wondering if he should push further before Epel quietly adds. "I hope you know they'd be stupid proud of you for everything. Pomefiore isn't an easy dorm to be a part of but if you put in the work you'll really thrive there, and the both of us really believe you've got what it takes to do that yeah? If you'll let me speak on their behalf anyway."

"Of course you can." Yutu does his best not to cry, but Epel can tell it isn't going to work. "You- you miss them too after all." And isn't that the truth.

The plan to go back in time is decided on before the blockade around Harveston can be breached. Epel gives Yutu as much information as he can about the past and what to expect before he goes, making him promise to hug the younger him at least once in the hopes the memory will somehow flow across time and he'll get a taste of what it's like to hold his son before he sends him off with a "good luck" and "kick their ass!" Even though neither of them fully know who is responsible just yet.

Epel! Yutu has an easier time adjusting to the past than a lot of the other Yutu's thanks to Epel's descriptions of people like- well mostly just his description of Rook. He still comes off as weird but in an endearing way as opposed to an "I need to run for my existence literally" type of way. Unfortunately his dad might have buried the memory of just how in his feelings and jealous he got about Yuu pre relationship. He's rolling his eyes and ignoring everything Yutu says because he wants to monopolize your attention and Yutu is honestly kind of living for it. He thinks it's super cool that his dad is willing to fight for Yuu's affections even though he could be considered to have no chance. He's short, more "cute" than he is "hot," and poor by a lot of people's standards. Sure, Yutu loves the farm life and Yuu must have to raise him in it but if that isn't how you grew up he's super surprised you chose Epel. Surprised and grateful because Yutu really loves his dad.

That love gets through to Epel somewhat, he's super confused as to why the new guy thinks he's so cool AND why he wants to complain about it. Isn't that what he wants? To be seen as cool, strong, and reliable? Well sure but he wants you to see him that way more than anything, it'd make him so happy if he had your approval. He's happy to have your friendship but- well it would just be nice to have you around forever. He's going to miss you when you go back to your world.

Yutu considers re joining the board games club to get close to Idia, but sees Azul and moonwalks his way out of there in a move that definitely doesn't put him on either of their radars and announces to Yuu that he will be starting a book club instead. He does this so he has a reasonable excuse to spend a bunch of time in the library and request access to various archives but Sebek joins since it meets once a week on Saturdays and railroads it into being like. An actual book club. They have other members too and Yutu hates it because he isn't super fond of wasting his time reading things unrelated to his mission but some of the stuff Sebek recommends is good he guesses.

Yutu thinks he's doing a good job of flying under the radar of suspicion, and to be fair Epel and Yuu are a bit too caught up in each other to notice the stranger things about Yutu but Sebek is not and convinces them to surveil where he goes after the book club meetings. Grim is on board just because he's tired of watching Epel and Yuu make heart eyes at each other and he thinks he can get tuna out of it so they make a day of it. It turns out Yutu goes to Craneport every weekend without fail to meet up with... someone. He goes to an apartment building and it would be a bit too obvious if they followed him in there without more evidence (Yuu has to be the one to point this out because you know Sebek and Epel are ready to charge.) So they keep this up for a couple of weeks until one day Yutu cancels the book club meeting and leaves campus early. This time he heads towards the mines Yuu explored with Ace and Deuce for the mage stone that second night they were at NRC. There are several people there, and Yutu does something he's never done, not even around Yuu who he has described as a friend. He lets down his hood.

The shock of lavender that tumbles out from the hood has all three of you tripping over yourselves to cover your mouths. His facial expressions, mannerisms, and even the way he goes the pull his hair screams that he has to be related to Epel. He's admitted to being from your world, and the way he speaks, the shape and color of his eyes and the way he laughs have to come from you. Sebek isn't able to keep it in any more as he starts crying, then loudly denying he's crying, congratulating you on your marriage since you are a friend of the young master before yelling at Yutu for acting in a manner that could have brought dishonor to his parents.

All of this scares the phantom Yutu's friends were hunting out of hiding and forces everyone to fight it. Yutu is extremely flustered from Sebek's scolding but he is nowhere near as embarrassed as Epel who immediately starts taking it out on the phantom and cussing up a storm. It's one of the quicker fights Yutu has had with a blot monster, and he isn't really complaining when Epel drags him and Yuu into the Dwarf's Cottage for a chat.

"So I'm yer Pa, Yuu's m' spouse and ya didn't think to spit that out 'fer you went fighting shit fucks BECAUSE?" Epel is steaming mad, he's almost as red as Riddle which Yutu would be impressed by if he wasn't so embarrassed.

"Um. Cause I didn't think you would-"

"YER GODSDAMNED RIGHT I WOULDN'TA BELIEVED YA! At first anyway." Normal, or would it be fake? Neither Yutu supposes, calm Epel is back as he crosses his arms and really looks at him. "You look like me, and you sound like them. I bet there's things you can tell me about myself you'd have no way of knowing otherwise so why bother hiding yourself? Don't you want my help?"

"Our help." You speak up immediately and Epel nods, affirming what you said slightly embarrassed he let his insecurities forget that you were here too for a moment. Yutu doesn't answer immediately, instead he looks very firmly at the ground as if he would rather be anywhere else than admit what he's about to.

"... not if it means you both die. I- I don't think I can watch that happen again." And oh seven does that change the tone of the conversation, because what does he mean by again?

Yutu refuses to answer until he gets to hug Epel. He expects it to be awkward, but it isn't at all. His dad squeezes him so tightly Yutu is sure his future self has got to feel it as he slowly lays out his story about the bad future and how he thinks it got to be there. About growing up in Yuu's world and the pain of watching you die. Epel is mad as hell to hear about it and swears it won't happen and is halfway out the door before he even has time to process it. Everyone brings Sebek up to speed, who insists on informing the young master immediately; something everyone agrees is a good course of action given how Briar Valley was the first place they know of being effected.

Malleus is delighted that everyone agreed to invite him on their secret mission, but also deeply disturbed by what hears. As Briar Valley's King, it is his responsibility to make sure nothing like Yutu is describing happens for no other reason than it would harm his subjects, but he can't help but be personally insulted that whoever did this would rob his human friend of their happiness too. The only re-payment he requests is that when (not if) he saves the future that Epel and Yuu invite him to the wedding, baby shower, christening, and any other important milestone they have in their lives. It's an easy enough thing to agree to Epel thinks. He has the approval of Ace and Deuce already, so to have Malleus announce he accepts him as your man too? That's all of the family you've collected in this world so... it's not too much trouble to ask you to join his, right? He won't be tricked this time, promise. You will walk this life hand in hand until the eternal sleep takes you both, and that won't happen until Yutu is practically an old man himself. And you of all people should know what Epel can do when he sets his mind to it; he got you to fall in love with him after all, didn't he?

[tinystudentthing]

OK so, Sawyer brother x reader headcanons

DRAYTON🧹

•Ok so we all know this man has anger issues like REALLY bad anger issues but with you? No never, you can't convince me otherwise

•He might get angry and rise his voice but as soon as he sees you sad over it he takes a second before trying to comfort you telling you he "didn't mean to get all...angry with ya"

• has a hard time with affection at first because he never got it growing up and he still does have a hard time with affection but he'll take hugs and hand holding

•cooks you your favorite food 24/7🍽

•when you start sharing a bed he gets stiff if you try to cuddle him but with relax after a few minutes, although he might not cuddle you back...

•if you don't like affection like that then he's kinda relieved bc he's get not all that into it but will accept it

•heavy sleeper unless it's when he needs to wake up he just wakes up on his own at the same time every day

Choptop sawyer💿

•this man is a r a t, he's brothers genuinely don't understand stand why you're with him

•can and will force you to listen to all of music and will through a FIT if you don't like his music/complain about it

• "But y/nnnn just listen it's so good!"

•sometimes he shakes, no explanation just does

•he 100% talks in his sleep and if you ask him about it he'll make up a story about it like "Oh yeah ofc I remember!" It just gets weirder and weirder the more he explains💤

•will be sooooo happy if you like physical affection but will understand if you don't but will be a little disappointed if you don't and he might forget from time to time....

•light sleeper and wakes up as soon as you even slightly move

Nubbins sawyer📸

• also another mystery of how you got together

•shares his bone collection with you and puts them in silly poses to make you laugh :D

•takes a lot of photos of you and I mean A LOT

•this boy is so LOUD so you kinda have to deal with it sorry loves😬

•Choptop is a third wheel whenever you hang out

•also heavy sleeper almost never wakes up unless you kiss him💋

Bubba sawyer🐷

•literally is so grateful that you exist

•is VERY happy if you like affection❣️

•if you don't he understands and completely respects that and you in general

•if you get him a gift he will squeal so LOUDLY

•He will literally cry a little

•follows you like a lost puppy🥺

•is a VERY heavy sleeper and clings to you in the middle of the night

Hope you kings, queens and everything in betweens like this I'll put more if you want more bye loves!🐾