#(wings exist! entirely having to accept any of the fighting is sort of his fault and so forth)

[godzexperiment]

every once in a while nix has batshit solutions to his family drama and it's like this was in none of his previous iterations so he really is just feral in his more or less final form

also im dying at him going from lock them in a room to genuinely considering paintball guns of all things like sure he acknowledges it would be an terrible idea but the mere fact he even considered it... (span of a not even few months the muse development is going great)

[existence-is-a-pain87]

Godslayer Shall Become God Itself

Yandere!Ultrakill (only Act 1 rn) x Reader

Warnings: Obsession and other general yandere behaviors; blood (this is Ultrakill, what'd you expect); gore; swearing; darker topics; naked people but not in a sexual way

Note: Ultrakill? More like epic-murder *cutely dies*

--☆☆☆☆☆--

God is gone.

He has abandoned this world.

You do not know what you are. You do not know who you are.

All you know is that you must kill God and take his place.

You are the godslayer.

--☆☆☆--

Standing at the gates of Hell itself, you steady yourself.

These are the souls of the damned, so many husks of what they once were. Many of them do not deserve to be spared as you cut them down to find God.

If he is anywhere, he would be here.

And you shall be the ember that rekindles humanity and this world, taking over his place to create life anew and mend his faults.

He shall die by your hands.

Your fucking hands.

Godslayer shall become God, that saying itself is the only law you exist by.

And you are the Godslayer.

...

Humanity's greed opened the gates to hell. You will shut these gates when God is dead.

You've long since accepted your purpose. Even if echoes of memories reside in your head, you ignore them. It does not matter.

Whoever you are, it doesn't matter.

You exist just to fufill your purpose.

So you stride into the gates, you know God couldn't have left this world entirely. He knows just as well as you that you need to slaughter him to take his place.

You're going to find him. And you're going to put a bullet, or knife, or axe, of whatever you get your hands on, through his skull.

Does God have a skull? Well, he better. If he doesn't, you can't stab him in the brain.

...

Striding through the halls, you note the corpses of damned souls that litter the ground, bullet wounds and dark fist-like marks stain their remains, as their blood is splattered upon the wall.

...something else was here. Something more dangerous than you, perhaps.

Your eyes narrow, and you know you need a weapon.

"...perhaps a knife. A pocket knife with a blade sharp enough to cleave through metal and any shell a demon wears with ease." You murmur aloud, as you raise your non-dominant hand to your face. "Something I can easily wield and fight with."

Then you sink your teeth into your palm.

--☆☆☆--

The taste of blood lingers in your mouth, akin to a faint echo.

You think you almost hear someone scolding you, but they sound as if they're far away and drowning beneath the waves that bury your memories.

You've never been a strong swimmer.

...

As you go deeper into this area, you know something else was here.

Something vicious, showing no mercy to the souls of the damned that desperately tried to escape. You see all their corpses, not even bothered to be tossed aside.

This idea was only confirmed when you heard the sounds of fighting in the next room, and peek in to see a robot of sorts fighting husks.

It easily shot them all dead, and you figured it was designed to fight if it was here.

You also noticed it seemed to absorb blood.

...

Great. A war machine.

None of your experiences with them have been positive in the long term.

Oh well. As long as it doesn't get in your way, you're fine with this.

So you just resume walking, and only glance over when the machine's camera-like head snaps to look at you, the yellow lens following your movement intently.

For a moment, it just stares. Then it points its gun at you.

You act swiftly. In one moment, you unsheathe your knife. In the next, it fires the gun. In the third, you cleave the bullet in half as both pieces uselessly fall to the ground. And in the fourth, you've knocked the gun out of its hands.

In the fifth, you've pinned it to the ground with your foot on its neck.

"I recommend you don't try that again." You instruct it, "I'm made to kill God himself. What do you think a gun will do?"

It just stares at you, but from its wing-like attachments being more raised and the way its head is drawn back, you can guess it's fairly surprised.

"..." You eye your knife, "I won't kill you, you know. But if you're using blood to refuel, you're doing an awfully bad job at it."

It stares at you, even more intently, as you step off it, grabbing its gun before it can so its unarmed.

Then you grab the corpse of a stray (you don't question why you know what it's called) and toss it over to the machine.

You lift an arm and slit it with your blade, sticking the arm on top of the now sitting robot.

"There's a shit ton of blood left in this thing that you're just wasting." You chide, and start doing CPR to force the blood to flow, "If you just took a few seconds and did this, then you'd get the blood flowing in the corpse and, guess what? More fucking blood."

The machine is silent, before faintly whirring in response. When the blood stops flowing entirely, you stand up and sigh.

"You understand me, right?" The machine nods. "Great. Now, just do this and don't waste a shit ton of blood you could use to refuel."

You toss its gun back to it and keep going.

...the machine follows you, though.

"...You also going into the depths of hell?" You ask it, and it nods. "...uh... alright. Go ahead of me then."

It doesn't. It just stops when you stop.

"...uh, hello?" You place your hands on your hips, "What are you doing?"

It just stares.

You wave a hand in front of its lens. It waves back.

"..." You just stare at it, "...Go ahead. I told you how to refuel easier. Go do that. And back off."

It, in fact, does not back off.

On the contrary, it seems intent on following you.

"Can you even talk?" You ask it, just wanting to figure out what the hell this thing wants.

It shakes its head.

"...okay, how about sign language?"

It immediately nods and starts signing, and honestly you have no idea what to feel anymore.

You prepared to fight this thing, maybe even kill it. But it seems like it's being weirdly friendly after it saw you could move fast enough to deflect an attack and render it harmless in less than three seconds.

'You're impressive. I want to follow. We go deep together.'

"And why would I want a war machine hanging around me?" You ask, crossing your arms.

'I fight well.' It tells you, 'I make whatever you want to do easier.'

"A mutually beneficial alliance..." You murmur, "...Well, I suppose I have nothing to lose if you do come along. Very well."

They're surprisingly happy with this. Perhaps just wanting you nearby as an extra line of defense due to their awfully fragile appearance.

'Name?'

You raise an eyebrow.

'Your name?'

"Oh- uh-"

A name has never really mattered to you. You don't necessarily recall knowing anyone, so you never really needed a name. It's always just sorta been you.

"...I don't got one." You decide to tell them, "Call me whatever. Godslayer may be the most accurate term if that's any help."

They stare at you, before pointing to the word V1 inscribed on their chest.

"Your name is V1, I presume?" They nod in response. "Ah, okay then. I guess I can call you that."

They seemed pleased. You think. Hard to tell with V1's lack of a face.

...

The two of you soon go off. And you figure that having a war machine by your side will make it all the easier to get to Hell's bottom.

And all the more easier to fufill your one purpose.

--☆☆☆--

There is a fucking meatgrinder in Hell.

Why? You don't know.

But why weren't you that surprised by this fact?

You didn't do much fighting. Only V1 really slaughtered everything, but seemed more careful on getting as much blood out of the husks and demons and possible.

And, much to your bewilderment, they started to carry you across gaps it made by blasting open the floor to keep you from plummetting into the blades.

You weren't necessarily annoyed. After all, V1 could jump much higher than you can and could dash mid-air. You were just some sort of human.

You think.

You pause for a moment to wipe the blood that now stains you off, with V1 stopping to watch you as you clean off the marks on the back of each hand.

When you stare at them, they look like upside down hearts. But you know, if one was to stare at them from in front of you, they'd be upright.

You didn't know where the marks came from, but they were always there.

V1 seems intrigued by them.

"...do you have beliefs?" You ask V1, glancing over.

V1 thinks for a moment, before shrugging.

"...sometimes I wonder if these marks on my hands mean anything." You tell them, "Perhaps if I believe it, they will. Maybe they mean a good thing, maybe they mean a bad thing. I dunno."

V1 seems curious.

'What if they mean nothing?'

"Then they mean nothing at all. I think it depends on if we believe they mean anything."

'I think they're pretty.'

"Thanks, V1."

'Should we keep going?'

"Yeah, let's go."

The two of you progressed, a yellow machine was absolutely slaughtering enemies and drenched you and V1 in blood.

"OH C'MON!" You say with a groan, annoyed your outfit is even more bloodstained and ruined than it was before as V1 lets out a whir of confusion as they absorb the blood.

Once the new machine slaughters literally everything, it pauses to stare at you and V1, taking in your annoyed mutters about your shirt, before running away.

You barely get time to process this as more foes show up and V1 fights them off with little effort yet more blood spraying everywhere.

You don't even care about your appearance too much, but this is just annoying.

You decide to head out of this room really quick to go make yourself a new outfit. Preferably one with a poncho or something that can keep you from being utterly stained in blood.

Some of it literally got in your mouth.

Sure, V1 may notice your gone, but they can find you easily enough. You need to change or you're going to tweak.

It was fairly easy to sneak around and into a large and empty room.

You sigh, content, as you pry off your bloodstained clothes and get yourself some new ones, plus a towel to wipe off your face.

Shame you can't just make yourself a shower or something. There's gonna be blood stuck in your hair for a while.

But while you're in the middle of mopping the red liquid off you, you look up and see something staring at you.

It's the yellow robot from earlier. And you're also shirtless right now.

"FUCK OFF!"

--☆☆☆--

You won the fight that broke out.

Didn't kill it, though. Mostly because it started talking and profusely apologizing. As if should.

You honestly were kind of impressed it managed to scrounge up a voicebox and insert it into its body to use as communication with others, even if said voicebox was shittily implemented and would regularly glitch out when they were speaking.

And somehow it all spiraled into it joining your team like this was fucking Pokémon.

What's a Pokémon..?

V1 was fairly bewildered when you introduced the two formally, but ultimately allowed the Swordsmachine to come along.

Neither of you spoke of the incident that led to this even happening. You're just glad to be wearing fresh clothes.

But progressing though the gates of Hell wasn't too much of an issue. The Cerebus statues that guarded the gates were slaughtered by V1 and Swordsmachine (this time you avoided becoming stained in blood).

Limbo was fairly nice, even if it was relatively fake with the birds chirping via speakers and other things.

It was even on this Layer of Hell V1 tossed you a coin. Not as a weapon, but just because they decided to start giving you coins, apparently.

You ended up with a pocket-full by the time the three of you actually started progressing through the level. And then the Streetcleaners showed up and lit everything on fire and you had to fight that Hideous Mass.

Then, a remnant of your past- more recent past, if you were being honest- came back to bite you in the ass.

Swordsmachine and V1 panicked when a certain red machine slid in out of nowhere, grabbing you as it went and fleeing before either machine could do literally anything to stop it.

And as you were unceremoniously pinned to the ground, you grunted as you looked up and into the lens of your kidnapper.

They don't need a face for you to know all the rage they contain.

"I told you that you couldn't run from me forever."

"..." You atare at them, already regretting it all. "Hello, V2. It's been a while."

--☆☆☆--

Meeting V2 was an accident.

This was back when you were on the surface, aimlessly wandering as the call of your purpose was the faintest it had ever been.

You found a damaged V2 slumped up against a wall. And you fixed them. Mostly out of boredom in a solitary and seemingly meaningless life with memories you knew where there but couldn't recall.

That, and pity.

Fixing them wasn't hard. You did it fairly quickly. Even giving them a voicebox so they could speak, using that Mark voice from Microsoft Word that you decided worked fine.

And they decided to hang around you. After all, they were designed with security in mind, and with no humans left, why not be the security for the one who repaired it?

You didn't need any security considering your... abilities, but they weren't detered. They just loyally stayed by your side.

You even considered them a friend. A close friend. Even if they appeared stoic and would insult you casually. They made you feel human. They even told you that you were one.

Then they started to worsen.

Gradually, they got more and more aggressive when you tried to do things on your own. They'd get pissy and would act like you hated them whenever you tried to make distance.

They refused to let you near danger, trying to put an end to your roaming lifestyle and keep you far away from anything that could harm you.

And when you decided you were gonna fufill your purpose and kill God? They freaked out.

It resulted in a fight you won.

And for some reason, you still fixed them afterwards, ignoring their crazed rambles and demands for you not to leave them.

You purposefully made them take more time to finally move again after your repairs so you could get the fuck out of there.

You didn't expect to ever see them again.

Just your luck, eh?

--☆☆☆--

"Here you are. In Hell." V2 mutters, staring at you with a look that only could be read as enraged. "With other fucking machines."

"You act like we're in a relationship, and I'm cheating on you." You drawl out, just staring at V2.

"It sure feels like you are." They snap back, "Do you know how hard it was to find you?!"

"I don't." You tell them, "I'm just fucking tired of your obsession."

"So you do hate me."

"That's not what I said."

"Yes, it was."

"Oh my fucking god-" You facepalm, "V2, you suck ass at communication whether it be listening or talking."

"I-"

"I DO NOT HATE YOU." You snap at them, "I just want to fufill my damn purpose, and you're acting like an overbearing parent!"

"I am not."

"Yeah, you are."

"Well, if you cared about your physical safety, I wouldn't need to be 'overbearing'!"

"What's there to care about? You know, just as well as I do, I'm basically immortal!"

"Shut up. Just- shut up." V2 snaps at you, practically facepalming with his non-existent face. "So what if you're immortal? You can still feel pain! WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WANTS SOMEONE THEY LOVE TO FEEL PAIN?!"

"It's not permanent!"

"I DON'T CARE!" V2 grabs you by the collar, lifting you up, "Fuck- you're an absolute moron, and the fact you're adorable isn't saving you. I'm tired of this."

"What are you gonna do? I can kick your ass easily." You retort, glowering at V2.

"And yet you haven't yet." V2 replies, almost deadpan. "Just stop fussing. It's easier that way."

"Oh go fuck yourself, you McDonald's microwave-looking ass-" You let out an angry yet muffled mumble as V2 just covers your mouth with a hand and hoisting you up to literally just carry you away.

"Hush." V2 instructs you, annoyed. "I'm so tired of your complaints. I don't even know how you managed without me. Wait. Let me guess, you had to use-"

Both of you flinch as a screeching Swordsmachine and a silently seething V1 burst into the room, both of which armed and clearly dangerous.

You manage to pry your mouth away from V2's hand, and give them a smug look. "...haha, you're fucked."

"You talk too much." V2 tells you, before setting you down and bowing at the two.

Then they fight.

...

Is it surprising V2 got their ass kicked or..?

V2 lets out a hiss of sorts as it stumbles in the middle of the room, trying to keep their left arm on their body, before his head snaps to stare at you. "I'll find you again. AND NEXT TIME, I'M NOT LOSING YOU!"

Then they flee, practically flying out of the room, dropping their left arm as they go.

"Psychotic ass robot..." You mutter, as both of your companions practically swarm you, trying to see if you're okay.

Your luck with robots has always been weird. Though, these two are nice.

You just hope they can stay that way.

--☆☆☆--

V1 stole V2's arm, and that's the funniest shit you've seen in a while.

But once you three got to Lust? Yeah, you were quite frankly pleased with how peaceful it was. You even got to find lore about the guy who made this place nice. Minos.

Yeah, V1 and Swordsmachine had to fight enemies, but compared to Limbo being charred?

Yeah, this is a massive upgrade in terms of 'oh, this is nice'. You just have to ignore the giant corpse with glowing eyes.

Also when you saw a portrait of Minos, you went: "Damn, he's kind of fine though. Shame he's dead.1"

V1 and Swordsmachine judged you for that. You didn't care. You DILF and MILF lovers will prevail.

You even got the chance to find a quiet corner in Lust to clean yourself off a bit because more blood got on you.

This time, you kept the shirt on, however. No more being seen half-naked by weird robots, thank you very much.

Also, since this place has functional water, you can finally get the blood out of your hair. Hooray!

But while you're in the midst of drying your hair off, you unfortunately get bathed in a teal glow of sorts.

...oh fuck.

"How are you alive?"

You sigh, setting the towel down in your lap, as you turn to look at Gabriel.

"Skill."

Despite the fact whatever face he has is covered by his armor, you can sense his scowl.

"You and your remarks..." He mutters, already annoyed. "I smote you. I saw nothing remain of you. How did you survive?"

"I mean..." You shrug, "Who said smiting me, killed me?"

"...what?"

"I mean- you killed me, yeah, but I didn't die."

"That makes no sense. Then again, you have never made sense."

"Ouch. Such cruel words from the angel who killed me."

"You're bitter about it, aren't you?"

"WHO WOULDN'T BE?!" You snap back, "YOU JUST SHOWED UP AND OUT OF NOWHERE TOLD ME I HAD TO DIE!"

"Silence."

"Nuh-uh. You be silent, you 'holier-than-thou' knight-looking motherfucker." You tell him, "You show up one day, we yap, you leave. You start showing up more, we basically become friends, and then one day you appear and just fucking tell me I have to die and actually do it! You're a bitch and I hate you, and would anyone in their right mind even blame me?"

"You're delusional." He retorts, "You believe that somehow you exist to kill the Father, and I simply decided to finally act upon my role and smite you."

"Your glow fluctuates when you lie." You tell him, "You totally had a different reason for smiting me."

"...it does?" Then he clears his throat and resumes being serious. "You somehow survived me smiting you and then willingly ventured into Hell. Furthermore, you ventured in with machines."

"Don't say 'machine' like it's a slur."

He ignores you (of course he does). "...do you know how hard it was to find you? I searched Hell itself in its entirety to somehow find you, and YOU WERE ALIVE THIS WHOLE TIME?!"

"Get good." You tell him, flipping him off. "And next time? Stay the fuck away from me. I don't care if you're the 'Judge of Hell' and 'Warrior of God'. You suck and ruined any friendship we had. I'm hanging out with the war machines now."

"...rest assured, we will meet again. And you will regret the choices you made."

"Yeah yeah, screw off." You reply, and resume drying your hair as Gabriel teleports away. "God, it's like all my exes just sensed I was in Hell and are now hunting me down or some shit."

--☆☆☆--

YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES EW EW EW EW- THEY CAME OUT OF THE CORPSE'S FUCKING EYES- YOU HATE PARASITES YOU HATE PARASITES AAAAAH YOU FUCKING HATE PARASITES!!!

--☆☆☆--

...

You met Gabriel a good bit after you got away from V2. You were just living an isolated yet roaming life, trying to find wherever God was so you could murk him.

Then a fucking angel came down from the Heavens. And that angel was Gabriel, being sent here because the rest of the angels were busy (more like they couldn't be bothered...).

You knew no angel wanted to do much of anything with humans. However, considering the fact that somehow you defied the extinction of humanity and was doing just fine made them decide to send someone down to find out how the hell you were alive.

Thankfully, you're a dumbass but wasn't stupid enough to just tell the angel that did not want to be here that you existed to kill God, and instead you just told him to leave.

And while he did leave, he came back the next day and tried to make you talk to him, almost curious by how closed off you were to him. And because he wanted every last drop of info he could squeeze out of you.

He didn't need to know it was just because you were gonna kill God and could sense no angel would take that well.

But you two talked a bit before you ceased it, and he came back again.

Eventually, you became accustomed to the angel who kept trying to fucking interrogate you. Then the interrogation attempts just became conversation.

He even started to bring tea when you mentioned how you were desperate for caffeine.

He even offered to give you a name.

...

"Pfft- a name?" You asked, lowering the cup as you gave Gabriel a surprised yet bemused look. "You want to give me a name, Gabe?"

"Well, it would be more efficient than simply referring to you as 'human' or 'mortal'." He replied, still sounding as serious as ever, but with a faint embarrassment in his tone.

"Do I really need a name though..?"

"Yes, you do."

"Heh, okay, okay. Think of what my name could be. Maybe I'll take it, maybe I won't. Hehe."

...

You sort of were friends with an angel. And you weren't too bothered. Despite his serious and holier-than-thou attitude, he was quite friendly when he wanted to be.

It made you lower your guard and tell him what your purpose was.

He just went silent and left.

After a while, he came back and confronted you. The two of you argued for a while, each delusional in their own ways, but eventually, the arguments subsided. The two of you resumed life as normal, even if it was now slightly more strained.

Then one day he showed up and told you that he had to kill you.

...

"What?" You sputtered, and your eyes widened. "You are going to smite me?!"

"Yes, I am." He had cooly responded.

"What the fuck do you mean?! What changed? You didn't try to smite me when I told you my purpose! You just argued with me! And now you decide to kill me?!"

"You've always allowed your emotions to control you..." He muttered, seeming to ignore you.

"Oh fuck no- explain to me what made you choose this!" You snapped at him, "What the fuck changed?!"

He was silent as he did it, having ignored you the entire time as he went through with it, leaving no trace of your body behind.

And when you were gone? When you couldn't hear? That's when he answered the question.

"...because I can not allow you to keep unwittingly tempting me to sin, you beautiful serpent of a human."

--☆☆☆--

Gluttony was exponentially less nice than Lust, with everything being uncomfortably fleshy with eyes, and mouths, and stomach acid...

God, you did not enjoy being stuck in the vore layer to put it lightly.

And also Gabriel was talking, telling the machines and you to turn back. Fun fact, none of you turned back.

Instead, yall kept going forward. You even entered a strange room and slid down a literal spinal column over an abyss and fought a Flesh Prison.

And holy shit, that thing was containing Minos himself as a Prime Soul.

You did not act normally upon seeing him.

However, when he said he was gonna kill Swordsmachine and V1, you intervened quickly. Pointing out how both spared and even protected you as you were technically the last human, so they were kinda atoning for their sins. Plus, a team of four facing off against Gabriel would be more efficient than a team of one. Also like you could punish the machines after Gabriel was dead or something, you don't know.

Somehow, he agreed. Now you had a team of four, and half of you have been smited by Gabriel.

Let's just say that the fight against Gabriel was really interesting. Mostly because three enraged folk were fighting against him as you watched from the sides.

They managed to beat him pretty well, but he just called them all "insignificant fucks" and left.

Welp. Guess you all had to keep going deeper.

--☆☆☆--

I'm not doing Act 2 in this because this shit is long enough as it is. Will I write for Act 2? Probably not unless people demand it or something. OKAY BAI, HOPE YOU ENJOYED AND I GOT THE CHARACTERS PERSONALITIES WELL ENOUGH!!!

[real-jaune-isms]

RWBY Volume 8 Chapter 7 Review/Remix

Last episode before the holiday break. The long long long holiday break. And here I am only posting my review the night before we come back... I was having a lot of fun playing my new video games, okay? Let’s just get right into this with the joke everyone has already made. War: What is it good for? Actually a lot, if you can believe it. Only in this specific context though, because the warfare in the American streets these last few days is disgusting and emblematic of what has been wrong with the country for a while. A government leader sending his followers into the nation’s capital on a mission of rage and personal catharsis? Ick. At least in RWBY the tyrant isn’t attacking members of his own population... Oh wait, Mantle. :P

For a moment you might be fooled into thinking we’re starting back in the farmlands of Mistral, maybe getting another look at Oscar’s earlier life or seeing a little more of Nora’s mysteriously tragic past before she and Ren met. But no, these are the wheat farms on the outskirts of Atlas and Sabyrs are charging through like raptors through the tall grass in Lost World. A battalion of Atlesian soldiers, human soldiers I might add, stand armed to meet them. But even if they’re armed they are by no means ready. Monstra keeps coughing up a new wave of Grimm, and I do mean a wave, every minute or two and Atlas is pretty damn whelmed in the face of it. There are some big bots with guns standing in straight lines, but the majority of the defense put up by Remnant’s supreme authority on military power and strength is mortal men with fear in their hearts rather than expendable robot soldiers. And the big bots seem to be lined up in a way that the ones in the front block the ones in the back, so that’s just poor planning too. It’s just a concerning sight all together, and they are not efficiently handling the coming enemy. We cut up to Ironwood in his office, and it seems he is not dealing with this situation well at all. We know he’s under a lot of stress from all the recent events, but they are in fact mostly his own fault due to his poor decision making skills in times of crisis, and his single minded drive he calls a Semblance. Speaking of the eternally expanding list of Ironwood’s bad ideas, he decides to evacuate all the civilians into Atlas’ below ground subway tunnels. Fun fact: There were Apathy among the Grimm Monstra has been spitting out. Second Fun Fact: Apathy were last seen thriving and murdering in an abandoned underground tunnel system beneath a well. If one is familiar with fantasy television pop culture of the last decade, the Crypts of Winterfell might pop into your mind as a similarly poor place to hide all your unarmed women and children. Y’know, cuz in Game of Thrones they were facing a guy who could raise the dead as his minions and crypts are just tunnels full of corpses. Just saying, this could end up being a non-birthday massacre. Whatever captain of lieutenant Ironwood was talking to is hesitant to go along with this idea, but Ironwood puts his foot down by putting his fist down. And so his voice comes on over the city-wide PA system to tell everyone they need to get down into the subway for their own safety. Compared to the organized marching and relative calm of the poor folks down in Mantle, these rich fat cats practically trample each other to run and scream down the stairs. A father is concerned his daughter is going to get snatched up by a swarm of Lancers, but seems even more upset by the squad of airships swooping in to combat them. 

Speaking of airships, we cut to the one Marrow and Harriet are flying. The Ace Ops have arrested YRJ, because of course they did, and they all hear radio chatter as pilots are reporting in about how Monstra is too tough for them to pierce from the outside with any of the weapons available to them. Winter checks in over comms to report her team’s limited successes, and Ironwood tells her to stay on jailor duty for a bit. Yang snarks at Winter for continuing to follow orders despite the circumstances, but conversation is stifled by Monstra coming into view for the group. Jaune laments that the beast now serving as Oscar’s confinement is larger than they had imagined from a distance, and Vine continues to be rigid in his assertions as to just what Grimm can and cannot do. “Grimm don’t take prisoners” he says, as if that’s an irrefutable fact. It’s not like any Grimm have done anything new or unheard of recently, like talk or grow wings or exist within a river of evil sludge or shoot up miles into the air as a geyser or have gravity Dust crystals in their underbelly to fly, or as you are witnessing right now belch out ponds worth of sludge from with waves of Grimm are emerging to fight your ground troops. Yep, we definitely know every single thing a Grimm does, especially one brought here by the mistress of the entire Grimm collective who is commanding most of them here. You sure are smart, Vine... Yang continues to be riled up and ask they be let go to help, but Elm and Vine hold her in her seat. Ironwood is heard giving the Manta jets new orders and reveals Command is working on a solution for Monstra. Winter, naturally wanting to be kept in the loop, asks what that might be. He reveals the science team is putting together a bomb that might be able to take the whale out if detonated inside it. That means Winter and the Ace Ops will be delivering it into the literal belly of the beast. I don’t know if he intends for it to be a suicide mission with the bomb going off as soon as they’ve got it inside, or if it’s just incredibly risky to try and get inside Monstra at all, but Winter pales at this news and her eyes go wide before sadly drooping closed again. She composes herself and grows determined again as she accepts the new marching orders. Jaune and Yang are again audibly against these plans due to the risk to Oscar’s safety, but they are subdued as needed, though we see Winter’s act isn’t absolute and her hands are shaking.

Meanwhile, Salem is having the time of her life doing her best Mickey Mouse impression. Classical music plays as she conducts the waves of Grimm sludge out of Monstra’s mouth like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice playing conductor to the stars themselves. Emerald watched from a distance, and seems less than thrilled about the whole thing. She heads down the halls and has to use her Semblance to keep a Seer from noticing her and potentially reporting her going where she doesn’t need to be to Salem. And where she’s going is the door outside Oscar’s torture room. He’s coughing up blood, and Hazel is still insisting he start telling the truth before Salem loses her patience and just kills him despite how futile it’d be. Instead Oz starts asking some questions of his own: Does Hazel know why Salem sought to recruit him in particular? It turns out she approached him with the promise of making a new world order where there won’t be any kingdoms or Huntsman Academies. Oz just has to laugh at that naiveté. When Salem gets the 4 Relics, there won’t be a world at all. She’s been around for so goddamn long, all she wants is for it to end, and she thinks taking the whole world down is the only way to get it anymore. This just frustrates Hazel, and we learn why. He’s pretty damn sure Salem can’t die at all, because when she first approached him about working together he spent the better part of a day killing her over and over and over again. This man, whom we know from the Battle of Haven to have massive reserves of Aura and strength to endure and keep fighting, kept fighting until he was too worn down and exhausted to lift his fists again. And in that time of weakness and awe at her power, Salem made her sales pitch that even if he couldn’t kill the one leading the Grimm he could at least have vengeance on the establishment sending young people to their deaths against her. Oz points out that that’s exactly why she went to him, because she could make him believe this was the right way, that it would bring him closure. It’s what Ozpin deserves, Hazel argues, and Oz does not disagree. But does Oscar deserve it? Do the innocent people who haven’t been affected by Salem or Ozpin yet?  No, this isn’t for justice, this is personal. Because Salem said it would help Hazel. Has it?

We don’t get an answer to that, instead going back up to Weiss’ room in Schnee Manor where she’s reapplying Nora’s bandages. Still mostly unconscious, Nora mutters “Now what... am I good for?” I can think of a great many things Nora is useful for outside of her great strength and straightforward approach to combat, but its a damn shame no one has actually bothered to tell her that before now. Before Weiss has a chance to offer any, Blake and Ruby enter the room with cups of tea. I’m not ashamed to admit I initially thought they were hot chocolate cuz I’m not used to tea being that sort of amber color. Weiss admits that she’s done the most her limited medical knowledge can offer, and Nora needs more than that. Blake expresses her concern for the other half of their group, but almost slips up and says... well we’re just not sure, but we like to assume she was gonna say she’s especially worried for someone in particular. The shippers can fill that in how they like. Their moping is interrupted by May entering the room with some less than stellar news from Fiona and the others down in Mantle. They haven’t seen Yang’s team in a while, and with everything going to hell like this a search party is at the bottom of the priority list. She’s about ready to get back on the airship and head back down to Mantle, but Weiss protests and this sparks a debate. May points out that Mantle doesn’t have the luxury of the Atlas military protecting them so Ruby’s group and the Happy Huntresses are the only thing keeping the people safe from the chaos of the invasion, but Weiss argues that there are still people suffering up her and I have to agree. Just because a police force is around doesn’t automatically mean they’re doing the best job of keeping everyone safe. But Weiss pushes the wrong button by asking about May’s family. The Marigold’s were ashamed of the way their “son” acted, wanting to help the suffering down in Mantle. And so May would no longer let herself be called that, she became a woman proudly working as part of the Happy Huntresses for the service of the people. She kicked her Marigold name and reputation to the curb and her cousin Henry stepped up as the socialite snob instead. 

This cannot have been an easy scene for Kdin to record, but we all need to give a standing ovation for her performance in it. Powerful words that likely hit very close to home. What a queen.

May is sure Weiss gets where she’s coming from with their families casting them aside in favor of a more obedient heir, her being replaced by Whitley after her outburst at the charity concert. Weiss wants to voice her disagreement, but May questions whose side she’s on in all this. Blake doesn’t like that, they’ve heard this talk about taking sides before and judging by her tone she’s none too happy to be hearing it now. May is about to give her a strongly worded piece of her mind too but Ruby stands between them to remind everyone there are no sides. All of humanity needs to be united, and Salem is the one creating the tension that’s dividing them so their real enemy is her. The only question now is how do they get out of this problem? The solution might be hiding just around the corner, literally. Whitley has been listening from behind the door, and he seems a little inspired.

Meanwhile Oz seems to have just finished telling Salem’s dark cursed backstory to Hazel, and it seems her final plan really is to have the world so divided and ruined that when the gods are brought back to judge it they will deem Remnant a failure and destroy it and hopefully her with it. Hazel seems less than inclined to believe this story though, he still holds a damn hard grudge over his sister. Oz is getting nowhere so Oscar asks to be put back in the lead, and so he is just as Hazel is about to wallop them again. Oz is willing to trust him so he can earn Hazel’s trust in return. So he goes right ahead and tells the big guy Jinn’s name and that it’s how you summon her for one last question. Hazel seems mad that Oscar gave up the info so effortlessly after all that, but Oscar asserts that he’s not telling Salem. He’s telling Hazel, and letting him decide what to do with the knowledge and the chance to gain deeper knowledge still. Pretty rad strategy. Wouldn’t you know it though, Emerald is still listening outside the door and heard everything. She goes to tell Mercury, but he’s busy packing a duffel bag for a trip to Vacuo. Guess Salem doesn’t need him here right now so we’ll get to see him again in Volume 9 or 10. He’s less than convinced that they should try and use this behind the scenes knowledge to go against Salem, cuz if Hazel couldn’t do it then why would he change his tune now? And why would they risk their necks too? It’s not like Oz was telling the truth, right? Salem isn’t really gonna destroy the world! But the teens get another surprise lecture from Uncle Tyrian: Of course Salem plans to destroy Remnant!! You couldn’t tell from the start? Everything about her screams end of the world, and it is beautiful! And if you thought she’d do anything different then you must really be crazy... Bold worlds from a psychotic serial killer, but we already know he’s unhinged. Mercury doesn’t much like getting this rude awakening though, especially since Tyrian will be the one going with him to Vacuo. Merc and Em share one last sad look, but he’s made his bed and now he’s resigned to lie in it. Bye bye Mercury, see you after Emerald has probably switched sides and will have to face you as an enemy...

Speaking of ships soaring through the air, we go back to the Ace Ops and YJR heading for Monstra. Yang is protesting the bombing plan since Oscar is still inside, but Vine insists they can’t afford to wait and risk further death and destruction. Jaune offers a side plan, send the three inside Monstra ahead of the bombing squad to scope things out for them and try to rescue Oscar while they’re doing recon. Marrow is shocked that they’d be willing to go into the literal belly of the beast alone, but Yang asserts he’d do the same for one of his teammates if they were in this position, right? He doesn’t have an answer for that. Elm argues that trading their lives just for one other person is stupid, but amazingly it is Ren who objects. Oscar is their friend, and they will do whatever it takes for someone they care about like that. A real turnaround from his attitude of closing himself off emotionally, but I guess he’s realizing how ridiculous it sounds coming from other people? Harriet gets out of her seat to do what she does best and start talking down to someone as naïve and wrong. Feelings are stupid, the job is what matters. When you lose someone you just replace them and forget about them. We find out that Winter is indeed meant to be the new leader instead of Clover, and before Marrow there was apparently a member of the team named Tortuga, but Ren is not about to let anyone tell him that someone is replaceable. You don’t say that to Team JNPR, and we definitely don’t say that about Ren... Not now. In his outrage, Ren suddenly finds... clarity. He starts seeing the world a little differently. In less cryptic terms, his Semblance seems to have evolved and he now sees people’s emotions swirling around them as colorful bursts of flower petals. Harriet is actually furious about losing Clover, she’s lying to herself and trying to suppress her feelings. She does not like being called out like that, but the rest of the squad needs to be put on blast. As opposed to Hare’s red petals Marrow is surrounded by blue that I guess would mean sadness or depression, Elm has orange and some red, and Vine is clouded with green. The meanings of the last two are a little less clear, but they’re all definitely feeling some strong things that they’re trying to hide under a calm façade. This is the reason the Ace Ops lost to RWBY, they’re all held back by trying not to connect with each other so unity and team bonds never formed. Elm does not like being told she’s a loser because she won’t make friends, but at least it’s a a reaction, which means he’s absolutely right. She’s about to deck Ren in the face but Winter steps in to get everyone calmed down. She looks these three “fugitives” over, and makes a decision. She’s going to trust her sister’s friends. They will get the teens in close and give them a small window of time to try and get in and out before the Ace Ops need to bring in the payload and blow it all away. Harriet is pissed Winter is giving these “traitors” a chance, and questions her decision thusly. But you’re outranked, you boob, and you can’t do a damn thing to stop her from showing human decency. They have a very tight schedule to attempt this rescue, and Jaune accepts that fully. The three get uncuffed and are given their weapons back as the ship lands at the front lines. Ren tries to appeal to the doubt and regret he can see in Marrow to get him to switch sides while the getting’s good. Marrow wants to, but he sticks to the job for now. Yang and Jaune head out first, while Ren lingers to tell Winter he knows she doesn’t want to be a part of all this anymore either, and we see a rainbow of many emotional petals around her head. Either she has a balance of many emotions in check and is the most levelheaded of the Ace Ops, or she has the most emotions repressed and her mind is a tempest of feelings that aren’t being addressed and may spell her end... take your pick.

As this militant Schnee considers her options, we go homeward to see Weiss and the others heading for the front door. May isn’t keen to stay her any longer than needed, and the kids need to make a choice about where she’s dropping them off. Either they go to the front lines here in Atlas or back down to Mantle to help with the chaos there. No other options, and especially no breaking their jailbirds out for an assist. May doesn’t have the optimism and heroic hope that Ruby still holds dear, she won’t entertain the idea that this can become a complete victory all around. This isn’t that kind of world. Either they help one place, or they help another. And even then, that’s no guarantee wherever they go will be successful at stopping the invasion. It’s very depressing, and it’s on these kids to accept the facts and make the hard decisions. If you take a look at the last few Volumes, Ruby does seem to have a bit of a habit of ignoring the dreadful possibilities/facts in favor of pursuing a hopeful and bold plan that could fix everything immediately so she doesn’t have to cope with reality and actually grieve her mistakes and losses... I’m not saying it makes her a bad character or that she’s wholly wrong for trying to see a bright side whenever possible, just that this is an unhealthy strategy for a leader with so much on her shoulders. But before anyone has time to make a decision right now, there’s a hard knock on the front door. Everyone draws their weapons and approaches slowly, before Weiss cautiously opens the door. In a most definitely welcome surprise, she is greeted by Klein!!! She missed him dearly, and apologizes for whatever fault she had in his being fired, but while cycling through personalities he assures her she has nothing to be sorry for since it’s all Jacques’ fault, the bastard. Turns out, Klein is here to use his medical knowledge to treat Nora. What, didn’t you know all butlers to heroic millionaires have field medic training? Alfred Pennyworth set the gold standard, I dare say~ But of course, Weiss didn’t call him and none of her friends know his number so who told him to come?... Would you believe it, Whitley is responsible and we could not be more proud of him! Weiss certainly is, and she gives him what might be his first genuinely loving hug in years. Klein heads upstairs to begin treatment, while the rest of the group share a hopeful moment. But this silence too comes to a crashing halt as there is further ruckus outside. This time Ruby answers the door, to see a smoking crater in the front driveway. RWB rush outside and kneel at the edge of the crater as the smoke clears. Penny has crash landed, and lies there in a pool of what we can only presume to be her green synthetic blood. All she has the strength left to do is apologize before she passes out and the screen darkens with her. There lies the end for the next 6 weeks, and we were left to panic and speculate all the while. Too bad I’m a lazy bugger who only got this review out now and there’s no tension left before the thrilling continuation comes tomorrow morning. So lets all get one last panicked sleep in before the living nightmares come for our girls! Penny is totally gonna be under Watt’s control, the Hound is coming, it’s all gonna be a huge damn mess... Can’t wait, can you?~

[mdelpin]

The Red Dragon - Chapter 29

AO3 | FF.Net | Tumblr: Ch1 | Ch28

Chapter 29

Since the moment Natsu had left to go talk to Gray, Igneel and Atlas had done nothing but read through old magic scrolls, trying to find anything that might help them figure out a way to permanently transform Gray into an ice dragon. Assuming Igneel’s theory of the boy possessing a dragon soul was correct.

The scrolls represented the collective magical knowledge accrued by the red dragons since time immemorial. Some of them were so old that they were only held together by the barest of magic. Every generation had added their own scrolls, and it had always fascinated Atlas to trace the magic back to the dragon that had created it.

Over the years, he and Igneel had added their own discoveries to the collection, and Atlas had held the hope that given his immense magical talent Natsu would someday do the same. Still, he knew that even if that happened, he would probably be the last red dragon to do so.

As hard as it was to accept, the fact remained that they were nearing the end of their existence. The red dragons had been the vanguard of the front lines and had been mostly obliterated during the war. There were less than a dozen left. Natsu would more than likely never father offspring, and their line of Royals would end with him.

Atlas looked up from the massive pile of scrolls he’d been studying, finally realizing it had been quite a while since Natsu had left.

“Aren’t you concerned Natsu isn’t back yet?” he asked Igneel, who was immersed in his own mountain of scrolls.

“Not really,” Igneel replied absently, “he and Gray had a lot to talk about. I think we both know if Acnologia had found them, he would’ve already come for us.”

Atlas grunted in agreement. He stared at the scrolls once again in frustration.

“Your research not going well?” Igneel peered at him.

“Not really, transformation magic is useless for all the reasons we’ve already discussed. Soul magic is more promising, but once again, there’s the energy problem, and I can’t find a way to generate the amount of energy needed.”

“I thought I told you not to worry about that.” Igneel reminded him, “I’ll come up with a way to get you the energy you need.”

“Yes, but you haven’t told me how you plan on doing that,” Atlas complained.

“I have a few ideas,” Igneel replied vaguely, “Have you figured out how to get a look at his soul?”

“Sure, that part’s easy, we just have to get him to astral project.”

“I don’t think that’s a skill humans are born with,” Igneel pointed out, ���You’re going to have to teach him how to do so.”

“Me?” Atlas balked at the idea, “How am I supposed to teach him that? Can’t we just cast a spell on him or something?”

“Do you think he would trust anything that came from a spell he didn’t cast?” Igneel replied, “Would you?”

“No,” Atlas admitted grudgingly.

“Besides it would be good for the two of you to bury the hatchet. What did you do anyway?”

“Why do you automatically assume I was the one to do something?”

Igneel roared with laughter, “Are you saying you weren’t?”

“Well no, but would it kill you to give me the benefit of the doubt?” Atlas groused.

“Brother, I’ve known you for hundreds of years. What did you do?”

“I wanted to show Natsu that the boy had grown and could handle seeing dragons, so I showed myself to him.”

“As intelligent as you are, you can be such an idiot sometimes. Let me guess, he attacked you?”

“Something like that,” Atlas grumbled, looking embarrassed.

“Yes, I rather think teaching him how to astral project will be a good opportunity for the two of you to put aside your differences. He’ll be one of us soon enough.”

“You really think we’re going to be able to pull this off?”

“We have to, for Natsu’s sake.”

Atlas grunted, he wasn’t pleased with the idea of spending time with Gray, and he had no clue how to go about teaching a human how to astral project, but he would figure something out.

For Natsu’s sake.

0-0

Gray was a nervous wreck by the time they arrived at the cave’s back entrance. He was no less determined for them to stay together, especially after the last two weeks they had spent together.

However, telling Natsu he wanted to live with him and moving into a cave with four red dragons were two completely different things. Especially when he was well aware that at least two of them disliked him.

“It’s going to be fine, you’re their Dragon Queen, remember?” Natsu tried to get a rise out of him, no doubt feeling his nerves through their bond.

Now that everything had been sorted between them, Gray could feel his mate close to him at all times, and it was a wonderful feeling. They could send feelings back and forth and could communicate without speaking if they wanted. Although they hadn’t done it much yet, it was reassuring to know they could.

“Atlas and Happy aren’t going to like my living here,” Gray muttered.

“Well, you could always try to, I don’t know, apologize?” Natsu pointed out, “They’re not unreasonable, and if they don’t accept it, at least you tried. It’s all you can do, Ice Block.”

“Ugh, it’s gonna be so hot, isn’t it?”

Natsu laughed, “Yep, maybe I can try to do something about our room, Atlas might know of some magic to keep it cooler than the rest of the cave.”

“You think so?” Gray asked, hopefully.

“Anything’s possible, but he’s the magic expert, not me. Now come on, let’s get this over with, they’re all inside.”

They walked into the cave, and Gray was immediately amazed by how big it was. He’d only ever been in the front rooms, and as they walked past many of passages he’d never seen before, he could see that it would take him a while to find his way around without getting lost.

“This place is huge!”

“Yeah, all the red dragons used to live here, although most of them were already off fighting when I was little. I only ever met the ones who were close to my father.”

As they got closer, Gray became more and more nervous until he felt Natsu’s wing surround him in a hug.

“It’s going to be okay,” Natsu assured him with a smile, and with a spring in his step, he entered the main room, calling out, “We’re home!”

“Natsu!” Happy ran at them, attempting to tackle Natsu in a play fight as Gray skittered out of the way.

“Hey buddy, did you miss me?” Natsu laughed, letting the younger dragon lick his snout a few times before pushing him off.

“Natsu, you’re home!” Igneel entered the main room quickly, nodding at Gray in acknowledgment.

“Took you long enough,” Atlas grumbled, coming in behind Igneel. “What’s he doing here?”

“He’s going to be living here from now on,” Natsu explained, his tone of voice inviting no argument, “I would like it if you could please make him a bed and if you could do something to make the temperature in my room more comfortable for him, that would be great.”

“I will do my best to make our Queen comfortable.”

Natsu peered at Atlas in shock, even though his tone had been laced with sarcasm he still hadn’t expected him to be so agreeable, at the very least he’d expected some kind of pushback.

“Okaaaay, uhm, thanks,” Natsu replied, switching his attention to Igneel, who only gave him an indifferent shrug in response.

“Thank you,” Gray bowed his head at Atlas. “I want to apologize for how I treated you, I, uhm, -”

Atlas cut him off, “There’s no need to apologize, that was my fault. I thought you would be able to handle it. I was wrong.”

“Thanks?” Gray had no idea how else to respond to that. The dragon certainly wasn’t wrong, but it didn’t precisely make Gray feel like they had progressed any.

“I’ll go make your room more hospitable,” Atlas muttered as he left the main room and headed to Natsu’s bedroom, Happy trailing behind him and asking if he could make him a bed too.

“Did I do something wrong?” Gray wondered, confused by the dragon’s behavior.

“You’re fine,” Igneel chuckled, “Believe it or not, that’s as close to an apology as I’ve ever seen him get. His people skills are pretty much nonexistent, but I know he does regret causing you pain.”

Gray wasn’t entirely sure he believed that, but before he could give voice to his thought, he felt the heat of Igneel’s gaze on him, “I trust you were able to sort out your differences?”

Natsu nodded, “We have reached an understanding.”

“Wonderful! Make yourself at home Gray, and welcome to the family, odd as we are.” Igneel lowered his head in what appeared to be an act of respect. “I’m going to go supervise Atlas before he gets too creative.”

Natsu laughed heartily, and Gray tried to draw strength from it. Overall it had gone better than he expected, but he knew it would be a while before he felt comfortable in his new home.

“You should go see your friends,” Natsu encouraged, “They’re probably worried about you, plus you’ll need to get your stuff. I can meet you at the field later to help you move it.”

“They’re your friends too,” Gray reminded him. “Lyon and Erza know about what happened, I’m sure they’d like to see you.”

“I’ll think about it,” Natsu replied rather unconvincingly, refusing to meet Gray’s eyes.

“Natsu!” Gray demanded, waiting until the dragon met his gaze. “If I can accept you the way you are, don’t you think they could too?”

Natsu remained stubbornly silent, but Gray thought he noticed a slight softening of his expression. One that signified that his mate was indeed thinking about it.

Natsu hadn’t really changed all that much. He was just communicating in ways that Gray wasn’t familiar with. So over the last few weeks, he’d put considerable effort into learning to decipher the clues hidden within Natsu’s behavior. Studying his gestures and combining them with the emotions he could feel through their bond until he felt like he had reached a better understanding than he previously had.

“Do it for Erza,” Gray pushed, even though he knew it was a sore subject, “you’re the only one who has come back. Don’t you think you owe her some answers?”

“I don’t really think she’d like what I have to say,” Natsu replied and thinking over everything he’d learned Gray found he couldn’t really argue that point.

“Alright, I’ll leave it for now, I might as well go get their interrogation over with,” Gray remarked, sticking his tongue out at Natsu when he heard him respond Better you than me in his head.

Your time will come soon enough…, Gray mock threatened. He gave Natsu the closest thing to a hug he could manage, wrapping his arms around the dragon’s long neck, and smiling when he felt Natsu rubbing his head on his cheek.

After giving him a kiss on his snout that had Natsu purring, he exited the cave, beginning the long trek to the village.

Later, loser, Gray thought with a smile.

Try not to get killed, Princess.

Gray snorted at the retort, content in the knowledge that when he returned with his things, Natsu would be home to greet him.

0-0

“This is great, thank you,” Natsu praised Atlas when he saw the results of his uncle’s efforts.

When Natsu had realized he’d no longer be able to change back, he’d removed the contents of his room, not wanting a visual reminder of a life he could never have again. Atlas had made a bedroom for Gray, but he had put some thought into his interactions with Natsu.

He had made a bed similar to the ones Natsu preferred but had crafted it so that Natsu could easily curl around it, keeping Gray close to him while they slept. He had somehow also managed to lower the room temperature somewhat, enough so that Gray wouldn’t have to call on his magic to be comfortable.

Happy decided to move into Atlas quarters to help keep the temperature down, and probably to limit his contact with Gray. Ether way, Natsu was grateful.

Atlas had also crafted additional pieces of furniture to hold Gray’s things. There were shelves on a wall above a desk and chair, a wardrobe, and a dresser for his clothes. All organized in a way that would still make it easy for Natsu to move around the room.

Natsu couldn’t wait to see Gray’s reaction. It wasn’t exactly what they’d had in mind so long ago, but it was a home they could easily share, and right now, that was more important to both of them than anything else.

He was still thinking about what it might be like when Igneel interrupted him.

“Gray is going to be gone for a while,” Igneel noted, “and I’ve missed you. How would you like to go flying with me for a little bit?”

Natsu felt the excitement creep up his spine. It was rare that Igneel asked to do stuff together.

“Sure!”

He followed his father out the back entrance, and soon they were in the air, flying side-by-side. Close enough their wings almost touched.

“Did you tell him everything?” Igneel asked, and Natsu immediately knew what he was referring to.

“Yeah, he knows about your part in what happened in Isvan,” Natsu revealed, “He doesn’t hold you responsible, though.”

“That’s a relief. Was it your idea to have him live with us?”

“No. To be honest, I was surprised when he suggested it. I didn’t think it was a good idea, but Gray wants us to fulfill our vows regardless of our situation. I just hope it won’t be too much for him to bear.” Natsu confessed, expressing his fear for the first time.

“He’s a strong man,” Igneel reminded him, “I’m really quite proud of the both of you for coming this far.”

Natsu still felt embarrassed over some of the decisions he had made, but he knew he had to put them behind him. Regardless of how they’d turned out, he’d done his best to protect Gray, and he’d have to be satisfied with that.

“Where are we going?”

“Remember that place Atlas and I used to take you when you were little?”

Natsu paid more attention to where they were going and noticed the outline of the mountains where his father and uncle had taught him fire dragon magic. It was also where they’d taught him to hunt and fish, and he grew excited to experience it again, this time as a dragon.

They hunted, more for sport than out of any real hunger, but they ate everything anyway, finding it disrespectful to not consume what they had killed. Igneel looked tired, so Natsu suggested they rest atop one of the mountains surrounding the lake basin where they had often fished. They lay side by side, listening to the sounds of nature all around them.

“Your mother would have liked it here, I think,” Igneel remarked, breaking the comfortable silence. Natsu held his breath, afraid that if he made a sound, his father would stop talking.

“There were so many things I wanted to show her, but there just wasn’t enough time,” Igneel sighed. “Let that be a lesson to you, son, don’t put things off. You never know when your time is going to come to an end. Human lives are fragile.”

“What was she like?” Natsu couldn’t help but ask, hoping that this time his father would answer.

Igneel closed his eyes, and Natsu was disappointed, thinking the topic was over. That was until he heard a grunt right before an image projected itself in front of them. One of a young man and woman running across the very field that Natsu and Gray had spent so much time on. Natsu recognized the man as the one his father had turned into when taking Utari into the village, and the woman, who wore a scarf he knew very well, was clearly the one in the picture Anna had shown him.

“I remember everything,” Igneel admitted, “I know I should have shared this with you sooner, but I- I hope you can understand.”

Natsu nodded absently, transfixed by what he was seeing.

They were both laughing, Igneel tackling Porlyusica to the ground. Natsu watched his parents look into each other’s eyes and smile with a joy he instantly recognized. Two souls combined into one.

The image faded to be replaced with a hundred others, each a small glimpse into his parents’ life together until Porlyusica appeared before them with a swollen belly.

Igneel let these linger the longest, and Natsu watched as his mother appeared to be talking and singing to him. He observed her wonder and joy at his kicks and the awe on his father’s face whenever he looked at her. After all these years, Natsu was finally able to sate the hunger he’d always felt for the mother he’d never known.

He knew the end was near, but he couldn’t look away, watching his entrance into the world with a heavy heart, knowing the price that had been paid. Tears streamed down his face as he watched his mother hold him for the first and last time. She kissed his head and whispered something to him before the image faded away.

“What did she say?” Natsu asked nervously.

“She said, I love you,” Igneel said simply, lowering his head. Natsu could see the slight shuddering of his body that announced the coming of tears his father didn’t want him to see.

That was all it took to break him, years of guilt overwhelming him with a sadness he couldn’t contain.

“I’m so sorry,” Natsu sobbed, “I took her away from you.”

“You did no such thing,” Igneel chided, straightening up so that he could rub his head against his son’s, their tears mingling briefly before evaporating. “Your mother knew what could happen, Natsu. She made her choice, and she never regretted it, and as devastated as I was by her death, I never regretted it either.”

“We both loved you,” Igneel smiled through his tears, swishing his tail until it was petting Natsu’s back, “from the moment we learned of your existence. And when I see her again, I’m going to tell her all about you. So that she can be as proud of you as I am.”

“I am so sorry for all the times I failed you over the years. I thought I was protecting you,” Igneel declared, “but that was never what you needed. I realize that now, and I promise I will do everything in my power to get you what you do need. You’ve suffered long enough.”

Natsu wasn’t entirely sure what his father meant by that, but he filed it away for later, content to bask in his father’s love. He closed his eyes, holding on to the image of his mother holding him in her arms.

0-0

Gray stood at the entrance to the Guard Headquarters feeling oddly nervous. He knew his decision to live with Natsu would come as a surprise to his friends, but he was still confident it was the right one. They had already been forced to spend too much time apart over the years.

The knowledge that Natsu could live for hundreds of years weighed on him deeply, and it filled him with a determination to spend as much time with him as possible. It would be an adjustment, but as far as he was concerned, he’d already made the biggest one in accepting Natsu as he was.

He was about to open the door when he was hugged from behind. Turning his head to see who it was, he was surprised to recognize Juvia and stiffened slightly.

Not this again.

“Juvia is so glad to see Gray is safe. We were so worried!”

Juvia let go of him, blushing prettily as she realized she might have overstepped.

“Sorry,” she apologized.

“That’s okay,” Gray smiled, feeling slightly less uncomfortable now that he recognized she hadn’t reverted to her old ways.

He finally opened the door for both of them and waved goodbye to Juvia before entering the changing room for the male guards. After taking his first real shower in weeks, he changed into his uniform, and once he deemed himself presentable, ventured out to look for Erza and his brother.

He found both of them in Erza’s office, where they were preparing for the daily briefing. Gray grinned, noting how closely they were standing together even while talking about work.

“Anything interesting happen while I was gone?”

They both looked up at the same time, their eyes widening into matching surprised expressions.

“Gray!”

They both rushed at him, and Gray soon found himself sandwiched in their embrace. He couldn’t help but smile.

He was home.

Erza left for a few minutes to issue some orders but soon returned, and together they made their way to the lake where they sat on a blanket Lyon had grabbed from Erza’s office.

“Were you able to talk some sense into him?” Lyon asked, studying him intently. What he was looking for exactly, Gray wasn’t sure.

“It wasn’t easy, but we talked sense into each other,” Gray amended. His eyes met Lyon’s, “We went to Isvan and back to where we first met.”

“That must have been hard,” Lyon observed.

“It was, but I think we both needed to see it. To really understand where we were each coming from and begin to move forward.”

“I’d like to talk to him,” Erza spoke so softly Gray almost didn’t hear her.

���I know, I’m trying, but he’s still resistant to the idea. I think he’s embarrassed at having lied to you for so long,” Gray confided, “I also think he’s nervous about how you will react. He cares about you a lot, and he’s already lost so much.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Erza protested, “I don’t care about that. He was only doing what his father asked. I understand that better than anyone and Natsu is Natsu no matter what guise he’s in, we’ve known each other most of our lives.”

“Just give him some time,” Gray advised, “I think he’ll come around, but it’s too soon to push.”

“Of course,” Erza agreed, “I apologize.”

“It’s just... he saved my life. I didn’t really think about it until after you left, but if he hadn’t shown up when he did-,” Erza shifted her gaze towards the lake, “I never got a chance to thank him.”

“Give him time,” Gray repeated, “I’m sure he’ll come around.” He reached out to squeeze her hand and felt her squeeze back.

“So are you back for good? It feels like you’re working your way up to something,” Lyon noted, as observant as always.

“Yeah, for the most part,” Gray avoided looking at Lyon, “I’m moving out of town, I’ve convinced Natsu to let me live with him.”

He waited for the protests that never came, confused until he saw Lyon and Erza gazing at each other with fond smiles.

“We expected as much,” Lyon clarified with a smirk, “You’ve waited for him for a very long time. You should do whatever works for both of you. God knows this situation is messed up as it is.”

“Yes,” Erza agreed, “You deserve to be happy. Are you planning on staying on as a guard?”

“For now,” Gray confirmed, not really knowing what the future had in store or if he’d have to move to that island Natsu had told him about at some point.

“Then we are happy to have you back. Now, since you have just returned from a two-week vacation, I’ll expect you to cover some shifts for the guards that had to work extra shifts during your absence,” Erza intoned, beginning to outline his schedule for the next two weeks.

“Starting tomorrow,” Erza flashed him a sheepish smile, “You may have the rest of today to move your stuff to your new home.”

Gray groaned, but then again, it’s not like he’d expected any different, and he was grateful that they had accepted his decision without argument. He waved goodby and headed to his apartment to pack the things he wanted to move to his new home.

0-0

It had been an unusually hot summer, and Gray had come to depend on the relief that the cooler temperature in their room provided him, as the rest of the cave was much too hot for his comfort. He and Natsu spent most of their time lounging in there, or outside.

Nights when he couldn’t sleep, Natsu would fly them to different places, often stopping atop snow-capped mountains to let Gray revel in the cold temperatures, so different from their cave.

It was mid-August when Gray arrived home after working a double shift to find Natsu waiting for him in their bedroom. There was something in his demeanor that made Gray uneasy, and he collapsed on his bed, too worn out from the long workday and the walk back from town to do anything more than wait for Natsu to get whatever it was off his chest.

“I’m going to have to leave in a couple of days,” Natsu began, narrowing his eyes as he took in Gray’s exhaustion.

“What?” Gray protested, “Already?”

Natsu had mentioned that he would have to go on one of his trips to the mysterious dragon island soon, and no amount of arguing or pleading on his part would get him to agree to let him come along.

“Yes, I’ve already put it off for too long.” Natsu admitted, “Belserion is very unhappy with me, things are happening that need my attention.”

“Why can’t I go with you? I can just stay with the dragon slayers.”

“I’ve already told you, humans are not allowed there.”

“Then why are the dragon slayers there?” Gray pointed out hoping to get through Natsu’s stubbornness even though he’d already tried this tactic several times before.

“They are there with their parents, and I’m not even sure how much longer they’ll be able to stay, that’s just one of the many things that I need to deal with.”

“I thought you said I was their Queen,” Gray crossed his arms in annoyance.

“You are my Queen, and those close to me will respect that, but that won’t get you very far on that island. If enough dragons were against it, your presence could start a civil war.”

“My father worked very hard to make this truce happen. Please, Gray, don’t fight me on this,” Natsu’s eyes were imploring as he explained his feelings.

“How long would you be gone?” Gray sighed in defeat.

Natsu’s grin was instantaneous, “Only a month.”

“A month?! You’re not going alone, are you?” Gray charged, aware as always that Acnologia was still out there somewhere.

“No, Happy is coming with me, in case I need to bring the slayers home. Plus, he always cheers Rogue up.”

“Are you going to talk to Sting?” Gray pressed his luck, knowing that this was one particular topic that usually caused Natsu to shut down, and as expected, he didn’t answer.

“Fine, I won’t push,” Gray sighed, choosing to let it go. The truth was he wasn’t too sure how he felt about Sting either, so he couldn’t precisely fault Natsu for his stance. “But if you’re going to be gone for a month, I demand cuddles. Now. Lots of them.”

Natsu pretended to be annoyed by his demands, but they both knew he loved any physical closeness they could manage just as much as Gray did. He curled up around Gray’s body, holding him as close as he could, and they spent a long night nuzzling and talking.

If only it were enough, Gray thought sadly.

0-0

Two days later, he watched Natsu take off with Happy. Natsu had promised to let them know when he arrived safely, although he hadn’t really explained how he was going to manage that, and Gray couldn’t help but worry.

It must have shown on his face because Igneel immediately attempted to assure him, “He’s made that trip many times, Gray. Happy too. They’ll be fine.”

“I hope so,” Gray replied, hating how scared his voice sounded.

“What about you?” Igneel asked, “What are your plans? Will you stay with us while he’s gone?”

Gray nodded, they were in the middle of a heatwave. As hot as it was outside, their bedroom in the cave was more refreshing than his apartment, plus he wanted to be close to where he could get news of his husband.

It made him nervous, though. This would be the first time he would be alone with the other dragons. Igneel always seemed happy to talk to him, but Atlas was another story. They hadn’t really had much contact since he had moved in, the dragon keeping to his room most of the time, making Gray wonder if it was because of his presence.

He determined to make an effort to come to some sort of understanding with the hellfire dragon, knowing it would make Natsu happy.

He swallowed the last vestiges of fear he felt toward Atlas and bravely addressed him, letting his curiosity guide him.

“How is it that Natsu will let you know when he arrives?” he asked, wondering if it was something he could also do.

“Astral projection,” Atlas answered in a bored tone.

“Astral projection?” Gray repeated with no clue what it meant. He looked at both dragons wanting to hear more, but the combined heat they gave off was already working against him.

“Perhaps we should continue this conversation in your room,” Igneel suggested kindly.

Gray nodded gratefully, immediately feeling better once they were inside his bedroom. He sat in his desk chair, peering at Atlas expectantly, waiting for an explanation.

“It’s a way for the soul to temporarily separate from the body, allowing it to travel and enter the astral realm. So even if Natsu is far away, my soul can travel to his, and we can communicate briefly.”

“So your soul would travel to the island?”

“No, it would meet Natsu on the astral realm.”

“Perhaps you could explain it in a way that he might understand better?” Igneel suggested drily.

“Fine,” Atlas huffed, turning his attention to Gray.

“All living creatures are made up of two main components, the physical and the astral. Your body is the physical, it houses your soul and allows it to interact with objects in this plane. Does that make sense?”

“Sort of, but what is the soul exactly?”

“That’s a little more difficult to explain, but basically it’s what defines who you are. You will live and die many times throughout your existence, but you will retain the same soul, it will just move to a new body and begin the cycle again. You might change gender or physical attributes from life to life, but your most basic characteristics will always remain the same.”

Gray thought about that, and as he did, he noticed Atlas and Igneel holding a silent conversation he wasn’t entirely sure he should interrupt.

“So the soul is capable of leaving the body?” Gray finally asked, tired of waiting.

“Yes,” Igneel replied, “With enough practice, the body can be trained to temporarily release its hold on the soul. It remains tethered but is free to explore on its own.”

“Could I, uhm, could I do that? Talk to Natsu while he’s away, I mean.” Gray puzzled, the whole idea sounded a little scary to him, but it’s not like he had a whole lot of anything else to do for the next month, and it would be fun to surprise him.”

“How should we know?” Atlas grumbled moodily, “you’d have to try. Do you know anything about meditation?”

Gray shook his head, “Would it be dangerous?”

“No,” Igneel assured him, “It’s quite safe. As I said, your soul remains tethered to your body, and that connection can only be broken in death.”

“It’s not a very effective method of communication, but since my telepathy can’t reach him where he is, it’s all we have.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Well, to be able to communicate with Natsu, he’d have to also be projecting at the same time. Usually, it would be a lot of trial and error, but Atlas taught Natsu some magic, which allows him to sort of tug at his soul to alert him when he’s trying to communicate with us. Then Atlas and I can meet him on the astral plane.”

“There’s an astral plane?” Gray was fascinated by everything he’d heard, having never known about any of these things before. He wondered if Ur had been aware of any of this.

“You don’t need to worry about any of that. I doubt you’ll be able to project in this room, let alone go to the astral plane” Atlas scoffed.

Gray huffed at the disdain he heard in the hellfire dragon’s voice, “I’ll have you know I’m a swift learner.”

“Is that so? Well then, if you can manage to do that much, I’ll teach you how to reach the astral plane myself,” Atlas’ contemptuous laugh echoed around them, making Gray want nothing more than to make the dragon eat his words.

But it turned out he wouldn’t have to wait long to see him knocked down a peg,

“Why wait?” Igneel declared, startling the both of them, “You might as well teach him from the beginning. You could start now.”

“What?!” Atlas sputtered at his brother’s words, “Surely you’re joking?”

It was hard to miss the glee in Igneel’s eyes at his brother’s reaction, and Gray found himself smirking in response.

“Not at all, who is better suited to teach him? You teach Natsu magic all the time,” Igneel reminded him.

“Yes, but Natsu listens to instruction,” Atlas pointed out, “I’m not sure about this one.”

“I already told you, I am a quick learner. Assuming you are any good at teaching that is,” Gray taunted, determined to prove Atlas wrong.

“Well then, no time like the present,” Igneel encouraged them, “Try not to kill each other.”

It was only when he noticed the satisfied glances the two dragons flashed each other that Gray realized he’d been had. He just wasn’t sure to what purpose.

He tried not to worry about it too much. After all, if he managed to learn how to do this, he’d be able to see Natsu while he was gone, and that was surely worth it.

0-0

“Do you even know the meaning of the word relax?” Atlas snipped for the fourth time in the last ten minutes.

It so wasn’t worth it.

Atlas was demanding, and he rarely handed out compliments. He was long-winded in his explanations and quick to anger. There had been at least three different occasions when Gray had wished he could manage to freeze the hellfire’s snout shut.

“How can I relax with you constantly breathing down my neck?” Gray snapped, running his fingers through his hair in an attempt to calm himself down.

They engaged in a staring contest, both glaring until Atlas decided to back down.

“Natsu had a hard time at first too,” Atlas chuckled, and it was hard to miss the affection in the gravelly voice. “He’s always had a hard time sitting still, especially to do something as stupid as breathing. His words, not mine.”

Gray grinned, that definitely sounded like his Flame-Brain. He willed himself to loosen up, knowing he’d make no progress until he did. Atlas was at least right about that much.

“I know you don’t think very much of me, Gray, but remember this at least. As different as we are, we share one significant thing in common. We both love Natsu very much.”

“I know,” was the best reply Gray could come up with, surprised as he was by the dragon’s attempt to get through to him. “I’m trying.”

“Alright then, Natsu got the hang of it eventually, so can you. Let’s try again, empty your mind of everything except breathing.”

Gray chose to move to his bed, figuring if he was going to remain seated for so long that he might as well get comfortable. Emptying his mind of any extraneous thought, he closed his eyes and began to focus on his breathing.

Time had ceased to exist, there was only the briefest of gaps as one breath flowed into the next. Gray had never considered how exhausting breathing was, one breath following another over and over with no end in sight. A simple action, quickly taken for granted until you were forced to account for every one.

He thought he felt something shift inside him but couldn’t risk the distraction. There was an audible gasp next to him, and he opened his eyes slowly. He couldn’t remember getting up, but there was Atlas encased in his flames as always, although Gray felt they looked somehow different.

Atlas pointed at Gray’s bed, confusing him, but he complied, turning his head to see what the dragon wanted him to see. He was able to see his body sitting on the bed, which seemed a strange thing for it to do without him.

The moment it dawned on him that he’d finally succeeded in projecting himself out of his body, he felt himself careening back into it.

“I did it?” Gray asked, puzzled as to what had just happened.

Rather than answering him, Atlas began to yell. “Igneel! You need to get in here.”

Gray was still trying to suss out why Atlas was acting so strangely when Igneel hurried in.

“Is something wrong?”

“Just the opposite, you were right,” Atlas began to pace around the room. “Tiamat’s tits, we might be able to pull this off after all!”

“Did he see it?” Igneel asked, looking just as excited as Atlas until Gray couldn’t take much more.

“See what? Will one of you tell me what the hell you’re going on about?”

“If you can manage to do it again, you’ll see for yourself,” Atlas smirked in challenge.

It took a long time to quiet his racing heart, but he found it wasn’t as hard to fall into the rhythm he’d achieved earlier now that he understood what to do. It still took a rather long time to feel that shift once again.

Once he did, he opened his eyes, feeling more confident, knowing that he had achieved this once already.

He saw both Igneel and Atlas standing a ways from him, although they looked almost shimmery, like what he imagined ghosts would look like. Atlas smiled at him encouragingly, which was already surreal, considering how the hellfire dragon had been acting all day.

But Igneel was gawking at him, eyes almost bulging out of their sockets. Gray went to rub his neck as he often did when he was confused, only to find that his neck seemed longer than usual.

He looked down at himself and startled. He felt his soul start to move back towards his body, but he actively fought it. As much as he was having trouble believing what he saw, he wanted to get a clearer picture.

Gray managed to move until he found himself in front of the mirror that hung above his dresser. He could rather understand Igneel’s reaction now, seeing as he was having a somewhat similar one himself. The face he had seen reflected back at him more times than he could ever care to count was nowhere to be found. There was the face of what could only be an ice dragon staring back at him in its place.

About the only thing he recognized was the eyes, which looked much the same as they always had, despite being almost comically large in his alarm. Spiky horns seemingly made of ice protruded from his navy blue colored head, and as Gray lifted his hand to touch them, he realized that his hands had somehow transformed into talons.

That was too much for him to handle. He slammed back into his body so hard it fell back on the bed.

“What the hell was that?” Gray spluttered, quickly standing up and moving away from the two fire dragons.

“What did you do to me? What kind of magic was that?” He yelled at Atlas. His heart was racing so fast he swore he could hear the blood traveling through it.

“I didn’t do anything,” Atlas protested.

“Gray, listen to me,” Igneel interrupted, keeping his voice level. “He really didn’t do anything but teach you the barest minimum of how to astral project. I am sorry we had to trick you, but I needed to know whether my hunch was right.”

“What hunch?” Gray’s eyes darted from one dragon to the other.” What are you talking about?”

“When you came here looking for Natsu, you didn’t set off any of the protection sigils we had on the entrances. Sigils that are designed to alert us of a human entering the cave. At first, I thought that was because you were soul-bonded to Natsu, but I realized it wasn’t possible. Natsu had damaged your bond so much that the sigils wouldn’t have been able to detect his soul at all.”

Gray peered at Igneel uncomprehendingly.

“So there had to be another reason,” Igneel gazed at him with concern, “Why don’t you sit down? This is a lot to take in.”

Gray shook his head, “Just tell me what this means.”

“It means you have a dragon soul,” Atlas explained, for once getting straight to the point. “You are a dragon that was reborn as a human.”

A/N: Thank you all for being so patient! It's been a rough few months, but things are starting to look up and I was able to finally devote some time to this story. I am not sure when the last chapter will be up as I have not started working on it yet, and both the Pride event and Gratsu Summer Solstice events are coming up in June and Gratsu Week and Slayer Week in July. Hopefully by the end of the summer!

@ao3feed-gratsu​

[corinthbayrpg]

NAME. Thalia Athanasios AGE & BIRTH DATE. 2000+ & Unknown GENDER & PRONOUNS. Female & She/Her SPECIES. Succubus OCCUPATION. Owner of Sol Gallery FACE CLAIM. Zazie Beetz

BIOGRAPHY

( tw: starvation, suicide, murder, robbery ) Once upon a time, there was a young woman from Germany named Frieda who traveled with a group of young artists. Among them were only people who did not want to survive by fighting or creating and changing goods – they wanted to bring light into people’s lives and entertain them. By creating musical compositions or acting out smaller plays, they entertained anyone who was important or rich enough to have an evening worth of looking at them. Frieda was the most loved out of the small group of travelers, because of her beauty and her enchanting singing voice. So maybe it was no surprise that she ended up having suitors left and right – though she never let anyone close enough.

Not until she met a beautiful young man in Egypt, who melted all of her defenses with one look out of his piercing blue eyes. The two strangers fell into bed together, and neither of them expected the consequences it held for their lives. Frieda ended up pregnant, and it was only then that she found out that the father of her child would be someone who was trying hard to be there for his family – but put everyone else’s needs before theirs. Petrichor Athanasios was the last person her daughter Thalia would have wanted as a father. In retrospective, he had never been much of one to begin with. The few memories of him she gathered growing up could have also been compared to those of a stranger who passed by every once in a while. Maybe she should have accepted it, maybe she should have just been happy with what she got, understand that Petrichor had more important tasks to tend to, people to save and protect. But the truth was, Thalia did not care about that. For a child growing up with only one parent, it was excruciating to miss him constantly without even really knowing who he was. It was torturous to be abandoned by him over and over again, to see him go when he barely just arrived what felt like seconds ago.

Seeing as her father wasn’t in the picture, Thalia’s entire life revolved around the group of people that had become her mother’s chosen family. The people who would play silly magic tricks on her to make her laugh on a bad day, who would sing her to sleep when her mother was out trying to earn money, who would do her hair to cheer her up on her birthdays. But no amount of love from any of them could replace the hole her father left in her chest. With every passing year, the anger in her chest grew more and more. At the end of the day, Thalia could not understand why she seemingly was so unimportant in the greater picture, why her father would not even care about her mother and her. And then, the worst thing she could have imagined happened. Shortly before she would come of age, just a few days before her birthday, her mother died.

It was quick, but not less painful to watch. The small group of artists was robbed by the small fireplace they had created in the woods on their way to their next destination. While Thalia was spared, her mother was stabbed, and bled out in her arms, as she cried for help and instead was left alone. Unfortunately for him, Petrichor had picked this peculiar timing to show back up in Thalia’s life. As a birthday gift of sorts, now that she was officially a grown up, he wanted to turn her into a phoenix. But she would have none of that. The moment she lay eyes on him, all the pent up anger, frustration, and also the added pain of losing her mother broke out of her like a storm, or a tidal wave. Thalia yelled at Petrichor, words upon words of what he had done wrong, and how maybe he could have saved her mother had he just been there to protect them. She despised him and the gift he wanted to offer her was not one that interested her in the slightest. Why would she spend a small eternity on this planet without her mother, and with the father who had been nothing but a stranger for her? To that, in the moment her mother took her last breath in her arms, Thalia had decided to never take anything from her father. So on that day, with tears in her eyes and anger in her voice, she told him that she never wanted to see him again. Then she turned her back on him, and it would be the last time she ever saw her father.

The people her mother had worked with took her along on their travels, but Thalia never had a thing for acting, and while she had a beautiful singing voice, just like her mother, she refused to sing – as it was a painful reminder of her dead mother. Eventually, they parted ways. They did not throw her out, but Thalia noticed that she was no longer as welcome as before, as she was just a burden and nothing more, and so she decided to slip away in the dark of the night, not even leaving behind a note. Thalia always was more of a painter. She ended up stealing paint and chalk, any sort of crayon, to be able to paint. It was the only thing she could do, and the only thing she was willing to do to survive. But despite the fact that she was truly blessed with skills, not many people had any use for something like a painting, and those that had the money and homes for it wouldn’t buy them from a young woman on the streets who looked like she slept under the stars.

Which Thalia did. She slept under the stars, eventually in a small tent she was able to afford. For years she moved from village to village, trying to sell or exchange her art, but it only got worse. Eventually, she was close to starving to death, close to just ceasing to exist. And that was when Helios decided to step into her life, after having listened to her prayers late at night. The God was a beautiful man who lit up the small place she slept in with her tent at the time, and who offered her what she always wanted: to be an artist admired by everyone. In exchange, her soul should be his, but he assured her it was not something she had to worry about. He was kind, which at the time seemed to be the opposite of her father, so when Helios sprinkled the information into the conversation that he was the brother of the Goddess who was responsible for her father’s absence, there was no more question that she’d accept. And Helios kept his promise. It seemed as if he had opened the eyes of everyone around her. Suddenly, people wanted to exchange the best goods for her paintings, and richer families sent people to bring her in to do paintings for them.

Thalia was no longer starving, she was well-fed, she looked healthy, and even managed to afford her own home. But that blessing did not last for long. Only three years after being blessed by Helios, Thalia’s fame as a well-known painter ended up being her demise. One evening, when she was painting in her backyard, someone broke into her home, and ended up killing her when she tried to interfere. It was a death similar to that of her mother, a sword to her stomach, then to her chest. She bled out in the grass staring at the stars, and wondering if she might see her mother again after taking her last breath.

She did not. Instead Thalia awoke in the same spot, alive, but changed. It took her a moment to remember the deal she made with Helios, and that this must be what he meant when he said that her soul should be his. At first, Thalia didn’t notice what had changed, even if she did feel different, but she simply put it off to the fact that she had survived her own death. It was not until she started being intimate with a young man who kept coming back for more paintings from her, who was absolutely enamored with her. Thalia, who had never been someone who really felt sexual attraction to many people, did it more out of believing that it would be expected of her, than out of really feeling a proper connection with him. And as he ended up taking his own life after their third night together, she realized that maybe it had been her fault. It took Thalia a bit longer than that, a few trials and errors, to find out that she was indeed the reason these people met their ends, or ended up depressed and rather soulless. Thalia only slowly came to terms with what it meant to be what she apparently was now: a succubus.

Thalia decided to leave her home town, and soon after that even Egypt, afraid of leaving too much of a noticeable trail behind. And that was how she ended up traveling through the world. She left behind a trail of paintings. The young succubus had an almost macabre fascination with dark and gloomy paintings, using a certain style that was recognizable like her handwriting. But whenever she had taken one too many souls, she ended up moving to the next place.

And during those travels, she ended up meeting someone who was exactly like her for the first time. Thalia had arrived in Europe, Greece more specifically, during 245 BC. She stumbled right into the fights between the Achaean and Aetolian leagues, but Thalia was not scared by the tumult she found herself in the middle of. For weird reasons, she had always been fascinated by death after all, and by trying to paint it and it’s gruesome brothers pain and madness. But she was also just a young woman, and tried to find the safest place for herself to be in. That was how she found herself hiding away along the lines of the Achaean league, who were allied with the Ptolemaic Kingdom. And in the ranks of said league, she met Lykaon Ambrosios. He was the one to approach her, having noticed their similarities, and at first, Thalia could not believe that she had met someone who was just like her. But Lykaon took her underneath his wing, and taught her plenty of things she did not yet know about being a succubus. He became a shoulder to lean on, someone she trusted and followed almost wherever he went. The two were seemingly glued together by the hip at times, as Thalia looked up to him in ways she had never looked up to her real father – simply because he was there, and seemed to care about her. Lykaon even taught her how to fight so she would be able to defend herself if it was necessary.

Once the Achaean war ended and the league was forced to dissolve, Lykaon was the one to make the decision that they had to get away before worse things happened, and he dragged Thalia along with him. She was grateful that he did not leave her behind or send her away, and so the two started traveling together. Thalia was always excited to see new places, but only rarely did she venture out to explore the world without Lykaon by her side. From time to time their paths would part, but never for long, and they would always reunite as quickly as possible. Only over a century later, they ended up properly parting for a longer amount of time.

It was in 1399, that Thalia then found herself in the Ottoman Empire. The Sultan had heard of her beautiful paintings, and requested she should do one of him. She discarded her home at the time to visit, and it was among his soldiers that Thalia met someone like herself again. When she met Kaan, she could not quite believe what she felt, how they immediately seemed to connect due to the fact that they had both been blessed, then cursed by a God. It had already seemed like a blessing to meet one other person like her, but this seemed too good to be true. While he was a fighter and adored bringing death to the people around him, she adored painting him, just as she adored painting death. Her collection soon held several paintings of this handsome man wielding a sword, or of two dark silhouettes in bed, one of them losing their soul to the wind. He became her best friend, if not her brother by choice, and she loved painting the scenes from the battlefield he told her about. Thalia was already known for her gruesome paintings around those who were interested in art wherever she went, but she was also excellent at doing portraits and it was how she got by most of the time. And when Kaan told her that his sister would like a portrait of her family, of course Thalia agreed to do this for him. If only she had known what this would mean for her. Thalia had never believed in love, much less in love at first sight. But the moment she lay eyes on her friend’s sister, she forgot how to breathe.

The woman was beautiful, and she had Thalia wrapped around her little finger with a simple smile. But there were two obstacles in their way: for one, Kaan’s sister was a married woman with a family. And if Thalia so much as dared to kiss her, she’d take pieces of her soul, and she couldn’t bear the thought of tainting her beautiful soul. Instead, their love blossomed quietly, secretly. With longing glances and brushing their hands against each other’s when they walked next to each other. Thalia had never before found someone who she would have given her life for over and over again, but this woman was it. They never spoke of their affection to each other, and at times, Thalia even wondered if she had imagined it. So one night, when they were alone, she gathered her bravery and spoke a monologue of what she felt for the other – simply so she would know, even if they could never be together. She did not expect an answer, and did not even properly give the other a chance for one; instead she went home feeling both lighter and heavier.

The next evening, she was delivered the news of her love’s death. Thalia never saw her again, was simply given the information through words, but that was already enough to shatter her heart. She screamed as if her own heart had been ripped from her chest. Kaan and her leaned on each other in a shared sense of agony and pain, trying to fix each other’s broken pieces after losing this person they cared so much about. They became more deathly, and more gruesome. Thalia tried to lose herself in the people she dragged to bed, but none of them did the trick. Their souls weren’t even worth it, as she kept feeling nothing when she was with them. Had it not been for Kaan, she might have willingly found a way to end her own life. Though she almost managed to do that anyway. Almost two hundred years after the woman she had loved left her life, Thalia found herself involved with a shapeshifter. It seemed fun at first, to coax the magic out of the other until there was nothing left. Soon after, the shifter who was empty of their magic was killed after leaving her home. What Thalia did not know was that the shifter had a brother who was hellbent on revenge. And that was how she ended up fleeing in the dead of the night once more, suddenly realizing that she did not want to be poisoned by his bite. She left Kaan behind, without a note once more, and fled the Ottoman Empire to go back to Europe next.

Thalia’s fascination with creating paintings full of darkness had only increased at that time, and it might have been the reason why the succubus felt herself drawn towards the biggest wars in European history. They both served as inspiration for her paintings, as well as providing the perfect scene to do what she had to do to survive – no one looked twice into a dying soldier, or a widow that was left behind and decided to take her own life. She painted plenty of scenes from the Thirty Years’ War, which might have been her favorite up until today. Next, she was attracted by the Great Northern War, which she spent hiding behind the lines of the Swedish Empire, pretending to be both a beautiful distraction for the leaders, and someone who would listen to their nightmares to put them into paint. Next she ended up in the Napoleonic Wars, and they were the first to make her feel like she was tired of war and death. Afterwards, Thalia decided to stay as far away from battle scenes as she could, and not even the World Wars were enough to lure her back in.

Thalia spent the last years in Zanzibar, where she painted mostly for herself. Every few years, she switched her location to not be remembered as a woman who did not age. And as it was time to leave Zanzibar now, she decided to follow the whispers of what was going on in Corinth Bay. The succubus had stayed away from war for so long, that the rumors she heard were enough to awaken an old longing. These whispers spoke of death and war, her favorite subjects to paint, and it felt like it was about time to reignite her muse. She arranged for someone to buy her a house and a place to build an art gallery in, and she only moved to Corinth once everything was set in place. The art gallery was named after the Roman name for the God who turned her into a succubus – maybe still a reminder to spite her father. Thalia is hoping for some good inspiration for her paintings, or simply for something exciting to happen in her life after all.

PERSONALITY

+ imaginative, fearless, independent - self-centered, careless, irrational

PLAYED BY LISA. GMT +1. She/Her.

[grimoireweavers]

Inside the Mind

          { plotted starter for Seb and Illya ;; @ataash }

♞—-» STEM was...

Fuck, Sebastian didn’t even know how to describe STEM at all. During his time in this impossible world, he’d come across documents, journal entries, and taped recordings that offered some insight on what was going on in this nightmare and why the nightmare even existed in the first place. It helped Sebastian understand that this was some sort of experiment that took its subjects to a different plain of existence, almost like a reality within a reality.

In truth, it sort of reminded him of the movie Inception. A silly thing to compare real life to, but a comparison that he couldn’t really overlook either, because the further he moved through the ever-changing and contorting environments that seemed to make no logical sense, Sebastian very much felt as if he were moving from one dream to another, further and further down until the possibility arouse that he would never be able to come back.

Letting such thoughts grab hold of him in such a way, though, brought about feelings of hopelessness. What was the point in fighting if he didn’t understand what was going on in the first place and had no real way out of the dark at all? It would be much easier to give himself over to the corruption that seemed to infect anyone who dared to brave the false-reality. He’d even watched as the corruption appeared and took root in his best friend and partner, Joseph Oda.

Yes, his relationship with Joseph had been strained as of late. Ever since Lily’s death and Myra’s disappearance after numerous attempts to convince Sebastian that Lily was alive, Sebastian’s reliance on alcohol as a means to cope grew worse and worse. Sebastian wasn’t oblivious to his problems, as many people who spoke about why Myra ran off and disappeared wrote off Sebastian’s worries and suspicions around her disappearance as her having enough of his shit. They often blamed him for chasing her off, since they both dealt with the grief of Lily’s death in their own ways and Sebastian “couldn’t be there for Myra because he was too worried about drowning his own sorrows in a liquor glass.”

The opposite, in fact, was true. Myra kept spouting off insane conspiracy theories over Lily’s death, even going as far as to claim she was still alive. She never provided Sebastian with proof and instead of sounding able-minded, she sounded crazy. Sebastian believed in the only thing they could do. Accept Lily’s death. Grieve. Deal with their loss together. Move forward. They had to accept reality before they could ever even begin to heal and as much as it pained him to say such, it’s what Myra needed to hear. Myra never listened and the further she pushed into her crazy ramblings about Lily still being alive, it drove a wedge between them. How could it not? She wouldn’t listen to him. She was picking at the wound and letting it fester and he could do nothing to stop her.

Myra ran off without him, likely to follow these leads about their daughter that she never actually shared with him, and no one would listen to him. Because it was his fault, his drinking, and his attempts to cope with the most horrific thing that could happen to a parent. Everyone thought so. He suspected that even Joseph thought so, despite how many times he reassured Sebastian that he was on his side.

Joseph worried for his friend, Sebastian knew that.

But Joseph went too far when he actually got their chief involved in Sebastian’s developing drinking problem. Seb never pretended not to have the issue, but it never interfered with work. He didn’t show up to the precinct drunk. He didn’t go on cases and investigations intoxicated. His addiction never stopped him from being efficient and effective, it was only a way to fill the silence of his loneliness when no one else was around to ground him. And Joseph had to go and run his mouth, thinking it would help the detective get better.

How, exactly? That was Sebastian’s question.

The turmoil in their relationship made watching Joseph slowly turn into a monster, reverting first to multiple suicide attempts to keep himself from losing his humanity, to actually turning on him no less horrific, though. Joseph was the one friend Sebastian still had in the world, the one person that would always have his back, and Joseph was just... gone. Boils and protruding veins spread across his flesh and the burning, red hot rage that pulsated in his eyes as he finally turned on Sebastian were not Joseph. Fuck, Seb wasn’t even sure there was anything left of Joseph in there.

And he could feel that same evil bubbling through for him as well... It was inside of him, trying desperately to claw its way out and take control. The longer people stayed inside STEM, the more they became part of STEM, and once they were part of the machine, they would have a roll to fill. Every cog had to spin, and every piece had a part to play. Once you lost yourself, you were nothing more than a cog, nothing more than a tool to keep this plain of reality as real and as authentic as possible.

So, what, again, was the point? Sebastian didn’t know how to navigate this place. The world was always changing. The second he thought he knew where he was going, he would plummet through the ground or be hurled at full force through the sky and land somewhere unrecognizable and foreign. He barely had enough time to navigate that new section before he was tossed somewhere else. A never-ending cycle that always brought about new and dangerous terrains as well as mindless creatures that only registered him as a threat.

The Haunted, as some of the notes he’d found, were the most common. That’s what he assumed happened to Joseph. They seemed to be the most normal form of corruption STEM had over a person who’d been trapped here too long. They were almost zombie-like in the way they moved and rushed people with ravenous hunger, though they didn’t actually appear to have any interest in devouring their victims and their condition didn’t spread by bite ( thank whatever God there might be, honestly ). There were other beings, though, larger, more volatile and hostile. The Keeper, with a safe for a head and the ability to kill itself and respawn from another safe elsewhere, always carrying that awful-smelling sac full of who knew what and a massive meat mallet that could crush the head of a human with one swing. The Sadist, a Haunted that was larger, stronger, and always seemed to be wielding a chainsaw as it’s weapon of choice. The Shiyo, a water monster that Sebastian never really got a good look at because it was always submerged in murky masses, unable to be seen by the naked eye. Laura, Ruvik’s mutated woman with six long, spidery limbs that moved just like a spider would. She was quick and her hands ended in curved talons that could carve flesh from bone.

Ruvik himself, a rather average looking specter who suffered severe burns all over his body. He seemed to linger in the background, pulling the strings, rather than confronting Sebastian himself. He always had an eye on the detective, but he rarely engaged firsthand.

And those were just to name a few of the many opponents Sebastian had to avoid or put down with his small arsenal of collected and modified weaponry. Thank fuck he actually knew how to use most basic firearms. Had a person less skilled than him in survival come into this world, they wouldn’t have lasted long. Which was probably why there were so many Haunted running amuck seemingly everywhere.

He finally found himself in a decrepit city. It looked like Krimson City, the place Sebastian had been born and raised and still lived to this day, but it was difficult to tell with the way the entire city seemed to float over nothing, the ground cracking apart so that anything unfortunate enough to fall into the fissures would cascade into nothingness. Buildings crumbled and sat at odd, unnatural angles, some even leaning so heavily on the building beside them, it was a wonder they didn’t send one another tumbling over like dominos.

Supplies were his top concern. After Joseph’s turning, he’d been completely alone to fend for himself, save for a boy named Leslie that wandered in and out of the picture. Leslie was... not all there. He was almost always accompanied by his doctor, who seemed to act as a carer for him in this world, though why either of them was here, he couldn’t quite discern. He’d run into them both together and separately a few times, and Sebastian had taken Leslie under his wing to protect him twice now, only to have the boy wander off again. Every time Sebastian attempted to follow him, the world would shift, and he would be dumped out into a completely new place. Alone.

Despite his worry, he knew he needed to keep moving, restock, and keep himself alive. He wouldn’t be any good to anyone if he was dead or worse, if he allowed himself to become Haunted. Why he still had the drive to fight and push through when it all seemed to hopeless, he didn’t know. Even if he did make it out of here, what did he have to go back to?

Every time those thoughts crept up, he stubbornly pushed them down and forced himself to take another step. That’s all he could do. Take another step. Step again. And again. Do the next thing, and then the next. It was the only way to navigate and survive a place like STEM, a place that didn’t make sense.

Part of him, a very little part all the way in the back of his mind, had already accepted that he must have snapped, that he’d finally lost it, and that none of this was real. Maybe a really elaborate fever dream? Maybe he was in a coma? Or maybe he’d died and gone to Hell. Sebastian always tried to be the best man that he could be, but he’d sinned enough and hurt enough in his life that if he’d woken up dead in Hell, he wouldn’t even be surprised.

‘Sorry, Mom,’ he kept finding himself thinking.

Finally, he managed to take shelter in a mostly intact office building. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stay there long. The Living always had a way of attracting the creatures of STEM, no matter how well they hid, but he’d at least be able to stop, rest for a breather, and hopefully find some supplies that would prove to be useful.

Making his way inside, he rummaged through a few mailboxes and desks in the entryway, finding a couple of spare bullets, a questionable looking syringe filled with a liquid that was so bright, he wondered if it’d glow under blacklight, and a journal entry ripped from its spine. The handwriting was smudged and it was difficult to make out, but it said something about Ruvik working with the doctor that was always with Leslie. Strange...

There was also a missing persons poster hanging on the front bulletin board. He found a lot of those during his time here. Were they the people who had lost themselves in STEM, he wondered?

He made his way up a few more floors, checking drawers, closets, and cabinets as he went for anything that might be useful, though the building showed signs of already being searched. Drawers left open and doors hanging on their hinges suggested that someone had already looted this place. Not exactly surprising, seeing how many people had apparently been here, but Sebastian wondered if this building was not quite as safe as he first expected. Was the person still here? Was it even a person?

Footsteps from above him caught his attention and he quickly lowered himself down into a crouch, slowly moving along the wall for cover as he made his way to the stairwell at the end of the hall. If someone or something else was here, he needed to know, and he needed to put it down before it found him if it turned out to be a threat. He found himself hopeful that might have been Joseph or, for Fuck sake, even Kidman might have been a blessing at this point. Even if the Junior Detective working under him and Joseph had proven to be rather sketchy, she was at least still alive and herself as far as he knew.

Sneaking his way up the stairs, he emerged on the floor above him, and he slowly pulled the revolver hanging in his shoulder holster from its protective pocket. Cocking it, Sebastian moved towards the source of the sound, only to find a rather normal-looking man in one of the cubicle office rooms. Well, normal wasn’t the right word. Tall—far taller than Sebastian—and well built, he definitely wasn’t your average, run of the mill human. If Sebastian’s mind had been allowed to wander, he even would have gone as far as to say handsome. But he looked human, a human not infected with the curses of this terrible place. No signs of turning and no signs of hostility. Yet.

Was he even real? That was an important question in these parts. And if he was, who the Hell was he, and what was he doing here?

Sebastian debated whether or not to engage, pressing his back firmly against the hallway wall next to the doorframe as he peaked inside the room, watching the man flip through documents atop desks and rummage through drawers. So, he was likely the reason that there wasn’t much to actually take in this building, then? Maybe that was a confirmation that he was, in fact, real?

[apawcalypse632-blog]

Building Trust

Read on AO3:   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18039812

Chapters 1/1  Words:18655

Summary:

When Tony and Peter get trapped in a building a few months after The Vulture, Tony uses it as a chance for them to get to know each other.

Tags: Miscarriage, Claustrophobia, partly non cannon - I do what i want, Infertility, Tony and Peter father and son, all errors grammatical or otherwise are my own,.I'm not a doctor or a construction worker, talks about people who are dead, Angst, head cannons accepted, Suicidal Thoughts,Big Bang Challenge

Peter had once read that Finland had one of the worst winters on the planet. It was in one those top ten BuzzFeed articles and at the time he’d thought nothing of ever needing to know this information. That, however, was before Spiderman, before Mr. Stark and before the Avengers - because here he was on the top of a building, designated as a look out along with the Falcon, freezing. He didn’t know if Falcon felt the same chill, as he was on the building catty corner to him Peter hadn’t thought Finland would be this cold, but he couldn’t disagree that Finland had harsh winters, as he was feeling the harsh cold wind even with his spidey suit on and heater running at full blast. He wasn’t about to complain though. This was his first major Avengers mission since Homecoming and the Vulture. He wasn’t an official Avenger, yet. Mr. Stark referred to him as an “Avenger in training”. Which meant two to three days a week he trained with one of the Avengers. This was even more awesome then it sounded. He enjoyed getting to know them one on one. Or he tried to. The first time he met Cap in person, Peter had been so excited and spellbound, he didn’t say a word for about fifteen minutes, just nods and hand gestures. Peter had been thoroughly embarrassed by his behavior when he was in the lab with Mr. Stark later. Mr. Stark had assured him it was fine, and that Cap had thought it was endearing.

“Endearing.” He’d moaned covering his face back up with the pillow on Mr. Starks old couch. “That’s like saying ‘cute’. I’m fifteen, I’m not cute.” Peter could feel the mechanic raise his eyebrow. “You know what I mean.” “It’s fine kiddo, I promise. It’s not like with black widow where you called her a mama spider.” “I just meant that she is protective and has maternal instincts.” He tried to explain. “Even if true, don’t upset a spy kid. It won’t end well for anyone. Besides Cap understands that your nervousness is 50% looking up to him and 50% hero worship.” Peter groaned and buried his face under the pillow.” Mr. Stark grinned. “I promise, it’s fine.”

“Look alive kid.” Falcon called in the com.

Making Peter blush as he came back to the present and looked around. He really should have his entire attention on what’s up. He just found distracting himself made him less cold. Peter looked up from his position. “Right, sorry.” His teeth chattered a bit and he shivered.

“The cold giving you problems Pete?” Mr. Stark asked.

“Didn’t you give him a heater, Tony?” Cap asked.

“Of course, I did, and by my calculations he’s been running it at full tilt for about 45 minutes.”

“That’s right.” Bruce chimed in before he could say anything more. ”Spiders don’t thermal regulate. I bet you don’t adjust to cold weather well at all. This must be awful for you.”

“I could give you a lift back to the jet if need be. Bruce won’t mind company.” Tony offered.

“No Mr. Stark I’m good. Really.” He said moving along the edge of the roof trying to get warmer.

“Ok we only have about twenty to thirty left.”

“Only,” Hawkeye tutted, and Peter saw one explode from what must have been an arrow.

“As I was saying before the interruption,” Mr. Stark cut in, “We are dwindling them down.

When we’re down to five to ten you can come down and help finish off. Falcon is coming now, so it’s just you on lookout kid.”

“Sounds good.” Falcon stated. And Peter watched the wings span as he headed for the ground.

“Sure thing Mr. Stark.” Peter said with a smile. He was going to fight Alien Robots sometimes his life really was amazing.

Peter worked to keep his mind on the task at hand after that, really, he was excited to be here and not just about first avenger missions, but it was kind of hard to not be excited about alien robots, because honestly, they were awesome looking. It reminded him of a kitten - cute on the outside, murderous rage on the inside. He sighed. He would be in on the action soon enough and if he was moving more, he might be warmer He knew Mr. Stark had his reasons for keeping him on the roof and not in the fray, but he was a little annoyed to be stuck as a look out. He wouldn’t complain about this, because being here was awesome. His whole life was awesome. Well sort of. He’d lost his parents and uncle far too soon and he and Aunt May struggled, but they had each other, there was food – maybe not enough, but enough to get by. And now he had Mr. Stark. Since the events with the Vulture, Mr. Stark was trying to make amends and train him and finally be a mentor to him.

He climbed up on the ledge checking that all signs were clear and trying to see any more of the fight, which he couldn’t now. It had moved further up the road. He sat down on the edge of the building swinging his legs a bit. He took a deep breath trying to soak in everything. He was with the Avengers, doing Avenger-y stuff. It gave him such a thrill. After he turned down his chance at being an avenger, probably the dumbest thing he’d ever done, he was sure Mr. Stark was totally done with him. Then the man had returned the suit and sent a text message the next day asking if they could meet to discuss the mentorship/internship.Peter had hesitated. Aunt May had told him he was grounded from everything but school until further notice. She had not been thrilled to find out her fifteen-year-old child was a vigilante. But Peter saw the perks of a meeting with Tony and His Aunt, hopes that Tony could persuade her where he couldn’t. He’d agreed to meet and made plans for all three of them to gather the next day at a coffee shop near his school. When they had arrived, his Aunt May had been ticked and immediately began giving Mr. Stark a piece of her mind. Pepper had stood in the background obviously amused at Mr. Stark's discomfort. But after ten minutes had stepped in to help. She’d calmed May down, had given her tea and some cookies and they began discussing how this would all work. When they came back around to Peter being grounded and not being allowed to meet with Tony yet, all three adults had turned to give him looks ranging from disapproval to glaring. Suddenly he wondered what made him think this was a good idea. Tony had relented first, and promised Peter could start the internship after his grounding was over and that he would do his best to not let things interfere with school or any extra curriculars. May had then reluctantly agreed, much to Peters delight, and informed Peter he would be in the dog house awhile as his grounding was three weeks and school, decathlon and home were the only places he could go. Also, he was put in charge of all chores around the apartment. Peter would have tried to talk his way out of it, spiderman existed because he wanted to fix things and help people, but his grounding wasn’t really him being spiderman, that wasn’t the biggest problem to May. It was the lying and leaving her out of it all. She wasn’t thrilled with him being in danger, but Mr. Stark agreed that he had the absolute best for his suit, and he’d be getting training from the best. Plus, he was on top of keeping the kid’s identity a secret. They’d left, not before Peter gave a giant thank you to the man who had always been his hero. Tony had smiled and told him not to thank him.

Peter had thanked May and been happy to have her know. They talked a little about what had happened but May seemed a little distant about things. Peter couldn’t blame her it was a big shift to find your nephew was a superhero. The three weeks had not flown by. He’d been bored with zero electronics and only school to see his friends. Ned had been supportive and tried to cheer him up. MJ without even knowing why he was grounded had insisted it must be serious if he was being punished for so long and therefore his fault. He knew she was right, but it didn’t make it easier.

When the three weeks had ended, he was thrilled. He and Mr. Stark met at the compound after Happy had picked him up from school. They had a late lunch and laid out some ground rules and gone over the schedule. Mr. Stark and he would meet two days a week and every other weekend. This gave him time for homework and friends and May and still left plenty of time for Spiderman. It was a good deal for Peter. He had been disappointed to learn his time wouldn’t be with just Iron Man but recovered quickly when he realized he would be taught by some of the other Avengers. Now when he arrived at the compound, he’d change into his workout clothes then proceeded to do a basic conditioning program (basic for a budding super hero), then two to three hours of training with one of the Avengers usually in combat or self-defense. Though Widow had started a tiny bit of spy training. Finally, he got to meet with Mr. Stark for dinner. Usually taken in the mess hall or the Avenger wing. Weekends were another day of training, and then a full day in the lab with Mr. Stark. That was the best part. Watching the way, the man worked, getting to help. Ned was super jealous, but Peter gave him all the descriptions of everything he could. Overall, it had only been a little over two months, but from what he could tell things were getting better. He knew and trained with the avengers, though he felt sometimes they treated him like a mascot. But he was so grateful to be here that he allowed their treatment and didn’t say anything. He just wanted to be on the team. Things were still a bit closed off between him and Mr. Stark. Their weekly meets were amazing, and he learned a lot, but the man seemed distant still. Mostly he talked about things anyone could hear about. Well until the last week or so. He’d begun to talk a bit about his wedding to Pepper which would be on June eighteenth of 2019. And probably a blow out in terms of party and cost. The date was not something anyone really knew, so Peter felt privileged to know.

They also had pretty good banter. Peter felt he could to an extent tease Mr. Stark and accept the same from him. They didn’t really goof off in the lab, but sometimes at dinner or training it would happen.

Peter did a quick look around and didn’t see anything. So, he checked up on the fight and they were down to fifteen. He decided to wait till they had twelve which wouldn’t be long. He thought about quickly pulling out his Stark phone and texting Ned. The phone and a new lab top had been courtesy of the “internship.” He had tried to politely refuse, but Aunt May had approved it. Peter felt like neither of them was making sense when that happened. Mr. Stark giving him some of the latest lap top and phone tech. Especially when he’d just been so pissed at him for the Ferry. May having just caught him in his suit a week before and her agreeing to such expensive items. It seemed outside of what he knew about them both. Aunt May had explained he was close to sixteen and therefore closer to eighteen and if she forbids him from this, he would just work harder to keep it from her. She knew he would keep doing this no matter what she and Mr. Stark might tell him. He had felt a bit bad because he knew she was right.

Peter shivered and ran his hands up and down his arms to get some warmth back into them. He was watching and waiting for the last two to take a hit before jumping into the fray. He wondered if because he was perched high on a roof if it was colder than usual. He looked around to see what was happening as part of his outlook duties he needed to look at places other than the fight. The fighting was mostly happening in the middle of four buildings. Peter could see Cap, Widow, Hawkeye and Scarlet all down in the middle of the action. Hulk hadn’t been called in yet but was on standby. Falcon was now down in the fray as well.

Peter sighed, he wouldn’t complain about being with the avengers out loud, but he was a little annoyed Mr. Stark had insisted Peter work as back up, despite the teens protest, as he was getting over a cold that had lasted two days and for Peter with the spider bite that was a long cold. Also, Mr. Stark pointed out he was “in training.” Peter had thought about commenting if that made Falcon in training too. But they weren’t there yet. The teen squatted down watching the fight, still pumped to go, in spite of his position, when they finished killing two more, make that one more, robot.

There was a low rumble then that caught Peter’s attention. The building across from him has been hit with an explosive device. Peter’s advanced hearing picked up a small scream and he began looking around. The area was to have been evacuated when they got there. Peter had helped with it. But looking down he saw a young girl probably around four, stumbling sleepily out of the room with blanket in hand. Peter slung his web and went swinging across what had become the battlefield again as the Avengers chased 11 robots through the streets.

“Kid?” Iron man shouted over the com, “What the heck are you doing?”

Peter focused on getting to the kid no one else saw, didn’t answer, just swung in front of her and swung her back and away from the damage. Then he left her with an EMT further away and came back to jump into the fray as he saw number eleven explode.

“Nice work on the kid, kid.” Mr. Stark said as Peter jumped in beside him. The teen grinned at him.

“Seems we got about ten left and that building needs rechecked. He pointed over towards the building where the child had come out of.

“I can do that.” Peter said heading to the building.

“Be careful Pete.” Iron Man said as he blasted number eight and nine out of the way.

“Always, Mr. Stark.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “If you get hurt, I have to tell Aunt May. No one wants that.” He said with a half-smile. He shot one the aliens in the face. “Remember that.”

“I’m not sure how that effects ME. Mr. Stark.”

“Brat.”

Peter chuckled and entered the blown-out side of the building being careful to watch for anything structurally unsound. Though he couldn’t imagine Mr. Stark sending him in without having checked for that first. He wasn’t far in when he felt his breath begin to quicken.

“You OK Spider.” It was Widow. He sighed sometimes he loved having the Avengers watch out for him and other days it was like having five older siblings and two extra parents, or maybe four older siblings and three extra parents. Peter got confused when he tried to figure out who the mom in the relationship was, though he knew Tony was the dad. Or not that he thought that Mr. Stark was his dad, or thought of him like that, but he was something. A mentor at least. God, Peter thought, what if Tony was the mom? Then Steve or Stephen or Bucky, maybe? One of them would be the dad. Peters breath sped up.

“Peter, kid?” Tony asked, and Peter realized he’d not responded.

“Fine.” He croaked out.

“Don’t sound it Peter. Come back out someone else will check.”

“What? No, Mr. Stark I can do it.”

It was a moment and then the man responded. “First of all, we’ve talked about this before. When on missions you are to be completely in subjection to the leadership of this team. Which means if you disagree, you do what?”

Peter took a breath feeling like a kid being scolded and said, “I take it up with you or Cap privately or in a meeting and not on the comms.”

“Correct. Now you are in a private channel, so lay it out for me.”

Peter smiled, realizing the man wasn’t mad at him just teaching him.“Well, I feel fine Mr. Stark.” He said walking a little further in.

“The breathing changes?”

“I, um, I don’t always like small spaces.”

“You’re claustrophobic?”

“Just sometimes.” He hedged. “Apparently there was a day care next to this edge room.” He said trying to change the subject. Peter heard a creek and his breath sucked in.

“Peter, I think you should leave. Come out and let someone else deal with it.” A Pause, “No one will think less of you.”

The fact that he said it made Peter think they would. “I’m fine. Mr. Stark.”

“Peter, I’m pulling rank. Get out now.”

“I’m fine.” He insisted continuing forward.

“I will ground you for a month if you don’t exit now.”

“Can you even do that?” Peter wondered aloud.

“I have ways. And I know people.”

“But there’s a field trip for decathlon soon.” Peter said making it to the edge of the room, but not heading out.

“Then do as you’re told.”

Peter sighed and headed out of the room. He was in the doorway when things began to rock. He grabbed hold of the door frame and tried to calm his breathing. He could hear Tony yelling across the com. Peter knew he should move and try to go towards the exit, throw a web or something, but all he could remember were Vultures wings. The stupid thing knocking out four pillars and him, underneath it all. His breathing really did go a muck with this memory.His breathing rapidly sped up and he couldn’t catch his breath. Little gasps, as sawdust and drywall seemed to fill his lungs. His right hand gripped hard on the door frame making finger dents in the groove and his left came to cover his mouth. He wasn’t sure exactly what happened next, but within a minute something slammed into him. He whimpered as he was pushed further into the room. Whatever had him was hard and metal and had pulled him tight to them self before wrapping itself in a ball over around him and an arm over his head partly shielding his face as part of the ceiling began to fall in.

It was minutes of darkness, noise and things pinging off Iron man, as Peter finally realized it was Mr. Stark wrapped protectively around him. As it began to quiet, Peter could hear the man in his ear whispering soothingly and it -wasn’t on the comm. This was live and in person. It seemed to settle so Peter started to move. But was held firmly in place and that was good because there were a few post falling objects that landed around them.

“All right.” Tony said a few minutes later when everything had finally stopped. He moved off him and began to assess.

Peter looked up at him, the man was covered in dirt and debris and there were some pings and scratches in the suit. “Are you ok, Mr. Stark?”

Tony did a once over and said, “Yea, you?”

Peter started to do the same moving to twist around so he could sit but he let out a small whimper, bringing Tony closer to his side.

He placed a hand on his knee and moved the kids leg around, letting out a low whistle. “You have a piece of glass in your leg. Alien robot glass at that.” When Peter looked at him questioningly, he stated, “Normal glass wouldn’t graze the suit.” Tony moved his hand causing Peter to wince. “Pretty big piece too.” Tony said gently maneuvering around his lower left leg.

Peter winced, “Can we get it out? And how did I get Alien tech in my leg?”

“There was one back near the next room, pretty sure he’s squished now, but he managed to get a shot off before I had you, sorry kid.”

Peter shuddered at the idea of being squished by the building. He took a deep breath, “That’s OK Mr. Stark, sorry I didn’t see him.” He said sheepishly.

Tony gave him a shrug. “It’s ok, kid. Friday.” Tony said, “You with me girl?

“Yes boss. I have scanned the area and things are stable. I have also scanned the wound and it seems that it is embedded in the muscle and near the posterior tibial artery and removing it would be unwise.” Peter dropped his head closing his eyes and trying to not cry. It hurt, and it just felt weird having something embedded in him.

Tony squeezed his shoulder “It will be fine Pete. Friday send coordinates to Cap and have him send an ETA please. Let the others know Peter is injured.”

“Certainly” Friday said.

A few minutes later Friday came back, “Due to the way the building has collapsed it will be several hours before they can retrieve you both. The alien invasion is over however.”

“One good thing,” Tony sighed, “Ok let them know the injury is that Peter has alien glass in his leg. Not life threatening from blood loss, yet, that I can tell, but high potential of infection and disease given its alien origin and I’m not sure we have anything to clean it with, but I’m just starting to look.”

“Message being relayed.”

Tony stood and walked the perimeter of the space they were in. There were shelves of cubbies and a desk at the front. “Peter, I think we’re in the day care room.”

“Great,” Peter muttered tightly, propped up against the wall, “I can see the others never letting me live that down.”

Tony chuckled, “Maybe, but they like you. I think they might tease a little, but it just means they are accepting you and treating you like part of the team. We all tease each other”

Peter sighed resting his head back against the wall and closing his eyes. “Maybe they could be less accepting.”

Tony stopped in his looking and gave Peter a long look. “Is someone giving you a hard time? Because if they are Cap and I can take care of it. Unless it is Cap? It isn’t me is it. I thought you liked banter,”

Peter opened his eyes, “It’s not you or Cap or anyone on the team for that matter, I just don’t like to be teased.” He hoped Tony would drop it.

“Sure kid, we’ll lay off, but just know no one means anything negative by it.”

Peter sighed, “Sorry Mr. Stark, I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, there teasing is fine. Really.”

“You sure?” Tony asked skeptically as he rifled through the teacher’s desk.

“Yea.” He closed his eyes again and waited as Tony searched the rest of the room.

It was a few minutes later when Tony returned with what he found.

“What’s all that?” Peter asked looking at the stack of stuff.

‘Some blankets, toddler sized, but should help us elevate and keep you a little warmer – even got a pillow.”

Peters eyes widened when he saw it was a Thor pillow. “I don’t need a pillow.” He said quickly. Tony rolled his eyes. “It’s not that big of a deal, no one is here to see. Besides you’ll be more comfortable.”

Peter sighed took it and put it behind his head. It was small, but Tony was right it was comfortable. Tony proceeded to roll up a couple of the small blankets and gently prop his leg up.

“I found a first aid kit, so I’m going to clean up the best I can. It might hurt.” He warned.

The teen nodded. He’d had Tony clean out a wound before and it always stung. The man always apologized, but explained they had to use strong antiseptic to make sure infection didn’t set it. Peter had asked about that once since he had a healing factor and Tony explained that it was the fast metabolism that would run the infection through his body faster than a normal person and that could be deadly. So, it was best to prevent infection as much as possible. Tony began to open the kit and decided a distraction was in order.

So how is school?” Tony asked settling down next to the kid and pulling out the antiseptic and some cotton balls.

“School is school.” Peter answered with a shrug not opening his eyes.

Tony opened the bottle and poured some peroxide onto the small cotton balls saturating them.

“Grades?” He said, putting on hand firmly on the kids knee to hold him in place.”

“Well within acceptable Spiderman levels.” Came the reply. Peter turned his head away, so he didn’t have to watch or know when it was coming. Tony nodded. “good.” He then laid the cotton balls on the top of the glass giving each a small squeeze to get the peroxide into the wound. Peter hissed and jerked, his leg tensing at the sharp burn. His eyes watered and he blinked rapidly to try to keep any tears from falling, but Tony had only done side of the glass. By the time he’d finished the second side light tears were falling. Tony cleaned the mess of cotton balls quicky before handing a tissue he found to Peter.

“Sorry kid, but it was necessary.” He moved to sit next to him against the wall. Peter moved a little so they were shoulder to shoulder. His Thor pillow was comfortable enough for now.

“Thanks. Mr. Stark.” He said quietly.

“You’re welcome.” Tony said reaching up and giving a gently ruffle to the kids hair. Affection like this wasn’t often in their routine, thought toney was doing more recently.

Since you didn’t have much to say about school and you are doing well,” He monitored the kid’s education, mostly just to make sure his grades were still acceptable for the internship. “How are Ned and MJ”

“Ned is going to get the new Lego set for us to build. Lots of pieces and with only a few days a week to work on it, could take months, so it sounds awesome. Bit expensive though. MJ is… well I think she might want to date me.” He said giving his mentor a sideways glance.

Tony raised an eyebrow, “You think?”

“Well one minute she acts like she likes me and the other she calls me loser. So I’m not sure.” He said with a shrug.

“Really?” He asked ears perking up as he turned to Tony.

“Yes really. At your age love is weird. You don’t always know how to express it. Sometimes at my age you still don’t.

“Oh.”

” Yea.” Tony said staring off.

Peter waited a moment before asking, “Was it hard to date as Iron Man?”

“Please.” He scoffed, “Peter, you’ve seen the news, I’ve dated a ton of women as both Iron Man and Tony Stark.”

“That’s not… I mean what if Pepper got hurt because you’re Iron man?”

Tony sighed, pulling his knees up and crossing his elbows over his knees. “She did actually. With the Mandarin. She was hurt, nearly killed. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without her kid. She’s the love of my life, the only person I can imagine tolerating me until I’m old and grey, and she still lets me do what I need to as Iron Man. She yells a bit when I’m stupid… Rhodey does too. But for the most part we work. There is balance.” He took a deep breath, “To answer your original question, I’d die if anything happened to her that I could prevent, but I wouldn’t give up what I have with her in the off chance something might happen. Been there done that. I think I’ve learned my lesson.” “Hmmm.” Peter hummed. “Thanks Mr. Stark, that’s helpful.”

Tony smiled. “Yea?” He asked with a raised eyebrow. Peter nodded. “Good.”

They sat in silence for a while before Tony looked at his watch and said, “Cap says it will be hours before they can get to us.” He’d already removed his gear once he verified, they were in a safe space.

“Oh,” Peter said with a sigh. “Why so long?”

“Well a whole building basically sits between us.” Tony said and turned to Peter when he heard his breath hitch. “You OK?”

“Mmmhmm.” He murmured but he was gasping a bit.

“All right come on”. He said pushing the kids head down over his lap, “Breath kid.” It took a couple minutes but the kids breathing finally evened out. “You good now?”

Peters head came up and Tony could see the red on his cheeks. “Fine, Mr. Stark. Didn’t mean to freak out.”

“So, you said sometimes you are claustrophobic?”

“Um, maybe a bit, I mean I don’t like being in buildings that might fall on me.” He pulled his right leg up and propped his head on his knee, the Thor pillow falling to the side. He took a deep breath then confessed, “I had a building collapse on me once.” “What? When did that happen?” Tony said shocked.

“When the vulture happened.”

“Peter that was almost 4 months ago you couldn’t have mentioned it?”

“I didn’t think it mattered. It’s not like buildings collapse on me often.”

Tony shook his head. “You really need to let me know things like this kid. I can’t help, if I don’t know. And I know the Vulture bit was a fiasco on my end. But I’m trying now.” He took a deep breath,” Ok what’s done is done. Are you going to be ok down here?”

“Well it’s not dark and I’m not alone and it’s not literally on top of me with me trapped with pieces of it on me holding me in place, so hopefully it will be ok.”

Tony stared at him for a moment then made some clicks on his watch and a hologram of a building came up. “So, this is where we are,” Tony said pointing at a smaller room, “and the collapse blocking then runs along here.” He pointed along some spaces around them, “This is where we are, and you can see it’s structurally sound. It’s everything around us that is having problems. That’s why it will take a while. But we are safe where we are from a further collapse. Feel better?”

“Oh, that’s, that’s not so bad. But how did it collapse to begin with?”

“I believe that alien robot that managed to get a shot off and send glass into your leg had something to do with it. Friday can’t scan all their tech. If I hadn’t seen him…” He trailed off

Peter shuddered, then gave a small smile. “Thanks, Mr. Stark.”

Tony flicked his watch and the image disappeared. “We have time to kill. You mentioned a field trip coming up?”

“Decathlon is going to Philly in a couple months they just announced that’s where the next competition will be. I must sit through some special thing with Principal Morita because of what happened in DC. They don’t want me to go AWOL again. But I get to go…. Well maybe.”

“Why maybe? I’m sure your principal will agree, you’ve been a model student since the Vulture incident.”

“It’s not that Mr. Stark. It’s just…. It’s kind of expensive and May is already working overtime. “

“Kid, if you need…”

“No thanks Mr. Stark. You already do more than enough for me, I can’t ask you for this.”

“I’m offering” He emphasized.

“Still Mr. Stark,” He said shaking his head. “I just wouldn’t feel right about it.”

Tony sighed. Then brightened, “You could work for me for it.”

“What? I mean I kind of already work for you.”

“Instead of just interning as Spiderman, I could give you actual chores/work around the lab or even the garage or penthouse and you could earn the money and it wouldn’t interfere too much with your other activities.” “That sounds… That sounds amazing actually.” He said with a nod.

“Good, then we are agreed.” He held out his hand and Peter shook it after only a moment.

Tony leaned back against the wall wondering what chores he could assign the kid, because his normal work wouldn’t cut it. It had to seem hard enough that he was earning it. Tony was sure he had some storage rooms that needed cleaned out and maybe work in the gym.

Tony realized after a moment that Peter’s breathing had changed and looked over to see he had a fine sheen of sweat across his forehead. “You ok?”

“Hmm.” Peters eyes squeezed shut and he made a small whimpering noise.

“Peter what’s wrong kid?”

“Leg.” He gasped out. “Hurts.”

Tony moved flicking his watch on for light and lightly took hold of his left ankle and turned the leg gently. “I can’t see anything causing pain, other than you have glass in your leg. There isn’t anything for pain in the first aid kit. Let me check the teacher’s desk. Maybe I missed it the first time.” He stood and quickly made his way to the front desk. Peter could hear him opening and closing drawers and then he came back a few minutes later.

“So, I found some children’s Motrin. Directions cover dosage up to an eleven-year-old, so I’ll just give you that dosage.”

Peter tensed as another sharp pain went through his leg and nodded willing to do anything to help. Tony poured the amount into the cup provided and then handed it to the kid. Peter tipped it back taking it like a shot in one go.

“You can’t take it again for 4-6 hours hopefully we’ll be out by then.” Tony said moving back up to sit by him. One hand dropping to the kid’s thigh and giving a light squeeze. “I know it hurts kid, but for now you’re going to have to just breath through it. The meds will kick in in maybe 30 minutes or so.”

Peter nodded, “Ok.” He said hoarsely and dropping his head over to rest on Tony’s shoulder. He didn’t want to try to crawl to the right and grab the Thor pillow.

“What you need is a distraction. Maybe a game.”

“I don’t see monopoly around here Mr. Stark.” The kid said humorlessly.

Tony rolled his eyes. ‘Ok smart aleck. I was thinking like a car game. Like I Spy or 20 questions.”

“The I spy would just be ‘I see something grey-answer - the wall’, Mr. Stark.”

“Twenty questions it is. I’ll go first.”

“But you just asked me a question about school and MJ and Ned and decathlon.”

“OK then you can go first.”

“Ok. What’s your favorite food?”

“Really? You can ask Iron Man any twenty questions and you go with food?”

“I’m under duress.”

Tony sighed. “My favorite food is meatballs.”

“You’ve eaten in other countries and your favorite food is meatballs?” Peter asked eyebrows raised.

Tony gave him a small smile. “Well my favorite type of meatball was the kind my mom prepared.”

“Oh” He breathed.

“Yea. I mean I still eat other meatballs, but when I was younger it was my favorite meal by her. She’d make it for me when I came home from school.” Tony sat there lost in the memory for a moment. “Anyway, same question to you.”

“Thai.” Peter said instantly.

“Figures” Tony muttered. The kid ate it at least once a week. “Guilty pleasure music?” He asked. ‘What do you like to listen to that people wouldn’t expect?”

Peter thought for a moment and then said, “I love the eighties.”

“Really?” Tony asked surprised.

“Yea. I like Michael Jackson. Sometimes when I’m training or working out that’s what I’m listening to. You?”

“Well you already know I like rock.”

“Right, I’ve been in your car and your lab.” He chuckled lightly.

“I like classical.” The kid’s eyebrows raised, and Tony laughed. “Again, it’s something I got from my mom. And while rock is what I primarily listen too, sometimes when I need to super focus on a project that’s what I listen too.”

“Maybe I’ll try that when exams come up.” Peter smiled.

“It can be helpful. I did that at MIT.”

“Cool. My turn. Hobby no one knows you have?”

“Hmmm, I should have said this before, but what’s said in here stays in here. We are in Vegas right now.” Tony said.

“Must be some hobby Mr. Stark if you are swearing me to secrecy.”

“Not just a hobby kid. Something only Rhodey and Pepper know. I’m going to trust you with it because you’re my mentee and I think trust is important between us.”

Peter swallowed, “I’ll keep all of it to myself Mr. Stark.” He said solemnly. “You’ll do the same for me?”

Tony nodded, “Of course.” A beat, “I play the piano And I don’t mean I dabble, I mean, I’m really good.”

Peter could tell it was true, because it didn’t have the usual Stark brag he’d heard about. “That’s amazing Mr. Stark.” He said sincerely “I’d love to hear you play sometime.”

“I don’t play for people kid. Pepper and Rhodey haven’t heard me either so don’t think I’m shutting you out. I have a special room in the compound no one knows where and it has a baby grand piano.”

“That’s really cool. I was never that good when I played the trombone.”

“That’s what you played in band? I thought it would be the trumpet or French horn.”

“No, my dad played the trombone when he was in high school and Ben and May still had his instrument in the attic. It worked out because I got to do something close to my dad and we didn’t have to buy an instrument or worse rent one from the school that other kid’s mouths had been on.” Peter shuddered.

Tony took a deep breath, ‘You don’t have to answer this kid, but do you remember much of your parents?”

Peter stared into the distance for a moment. “Not as much as I’d like. Mostly I remember stories from May and Ben and a few people that knew them. I have a couple vague memories or my mom putting me to bed and one of my dad’s putting me in time out. I think I threw a toy at his head when I was four and didn’t get to watch my favorite cartoon.” He smiled, “I love that memory. Not because I got in trouble, but it just reminds me at one time I was just a little kid, doing little kid things, with no worries about parents going away or how to survive a radioactive spider bite.” His voice was a bit choked by the end.

“Sorry, kid,” Mr. Stark said softly,” I shouldn’t have asked.”

“It’s OK Mr. Stark. No one ever really asks me about them. I mean May and I talk about them some, but really, it’s like people forget I had parents before May and Ben. Sometimes I feel that way too. It feels disloyal to not think about them more. I haven’t even been to the graveside since Ben died.”

Tony reached over and squeezed the kids’ shoulder. “It’s ok Pete. After my parents died, I didn’t visit the grave for years. It was hard.” He swallowed. “Eventually I began to talk about them and that helped and now I try to go once a year.” “There isn’t really anyone that remembers them Mr. Stark. I mean my family is May and she’s not even a blood relative.”

“Ben was related to your dad?” He guessed.

“Brothers,” Peter said. “Ben was the younger one. I was so happy when they took me in. Not because my parents had died, that part sucked, but when I finally got to live with them, things just got so much better and I did have people who knew my parents.”

“What do you mean by ‘when you finally got to live with them?”

Peter moved around getting more comfortable before answering. His head still rested on Tony’s shoulder. “I wasn’t immediately allowed to live with my Aunt and Uncle. Some stupid law about needing my own room and that being more important than a grieving child being with people who loved and wanted him.”

“You were in foster care?” Tony asked for confirmation.

“About four or five months,” he said with a nod. ‘I wasn’t a fan.” He shuttered slightly at the memory.

Tony reached his hand up and ran it through the kids curls for a moment trying to soothe. Then realized what he was doing and tried to stop, but Peter made a small murmur and Tony couldn’t bring himself to stop. Peters breath hitched, and the kid turned his face more into Tony’s shoulder trying to hide the tears that were starting to fall.

“It’s ok underoos.” Tony whispered gently. Peter cried for several minutes, some of his sobs coming out in loud echoing sounds in the room. Tony did his best to comfort and wondered how there was still so much about this kid he didn’t know. Peter eventually sat up swiping the tears from his eyes. “Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. I shouldn’t have asked about your parents. I know it can upset me when others ask me about mine.”

“It’s ok Mr. Stark. I’m glad you asked. It was just a rough time.’ He shrugged. “It sometimes still is.”

Tony nodded. “I get that. My parents died almost 30 years ago, and I still feel that way. You never really stop thinking about them and trust me that’s ok.”

Peter nodded, “May says that and Ben used to say that too.”

“Smart people. Let’s try a lighter question now.”

Peter sniffles still not totally calmed down and said, “If you could be any animal in the world what would you be?”

“Are mythical included?”

“Since you asked, I’m assuming you have one in mind so yes.”

“Unicorn – they are so majestic and the national animal of Scotland.”

“Wow, Mr. Stark.”

The man just smiled at him, “I could also stab people with my horn.” That made Peter laugh, and Tony smiled at his achievement. “You?”

“A dragon. I just think they are amazing, and I could fly and catch things on fire.”

“Solid reasons.” Peter shifted again with a grimace. “How are you doing?”

“Still sore. Better with the medicine but still sore. And it keeps feeling better then I’ll get shooting pains through it which of course feels worse.”

“Mmmhmm. Let me check it out again.” Peter nodded and Tony moved to the other side or him turning his leg slightly. “Ok, this is probably going to hurt for a moment.” Tony said gently.

“Kay.” Peter said bracing himself.

Tony then poked at some of the skin around the glass. Peter swallowed a cry but couldn’t stop the small cry

“Shhh, easy.” Tony said gently. “I know it hurts. I’m almost done.” Peter couldn’t stop the yell when Tony continued poking. When he stopped tears streaked down the kids face and Tony moved around to sit back down next to him and pulled the kid back against his shoulder. He then rested a hand against his forehead. Peter couldn’t help but lean against the man’s hand that was cool and comfortable. “It’s infected kid.” He informed the kid. “You’re running a light fever right now. The skin around the glass is puckered. You might even end of with a scar.” Peter groaned slightly. “Why don’t you lay down and try to rest. It might help.”

Peter shook his head. “Fine here.” He murmured.

“You’ll be more comfortable laying down kid. You can use my leg for a pillow how about that.” He said, remember May mentioning the kids clinging during illness. Peter nodded and flipped around laying down with his head on the man’s lap. Tony rested a hand in his hair, stroking it gently. “Friday?”

“Yes boss?” “Tell Cap that getting us out of here needs to be a priority, the kid has an infection.”

He waited a few minutes till the response came in. “Mr. Rogers has asked me to inform you that they are doing their best to get here, but at this time it will still be another 2-3 hours.”

Peter groaned and shivered, causing Tony to rub his back and say, “It will be OK spider-ling. Rest. Then maybe we can continue our game.”

Peter nodded and closed his eyes again.It was only about ten minutes later when he opened them again.

“You should be resting spider-ling.” Came a voice from above. He felt kind of floaty. “Can’t sleep.”

Tony sighed, ‘Is it the pain?” Mr. Stark could do nothing about that.

“No.” Peter insisted.

Tony shook his head, ““Liar.” Peter gaped at him.

“I’m not lying.”

“Really?” Tony said, “So your leg really doesn’t hurt even though there is an 7-inch piece of glass sticking out of it, 4 inches of which are actually embedded in your leg?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Um, well, I mean, ok, so it does hurt… some.” He clarified when Tony looked satisfied at his answer and then troubled.

“Kid.” Tony was frustrated Peter could tell. The man took a deep breath and said, “As long as we’re stuck down here, we’re going to talk about this. But first let me look at your leg and see if we can make it any better.”

Peter wasn’t sure what he wanted to talk about exactly, but he leaned his head against the wall closing his eyes against the ache, while Tony gently looked to see if he could do anything that he hadn’t been able to do 10 minutes ago.

“Well it’s already elevated. But infection is beginning to set in. It’s pretty red around where the glass is sticking out.”

Peter swallowed hard, “Can you stop describing it please?” He asked.

Tony gave him a tight sympathetic smile. “Sorry kid.” He reached up and Peter startled slightly when his hand landed on his forehead. “Easy,” He murmured. “Just checking for fever.” After a moment, “You’re definitely warmer. We’ll have to watch that.”

“Yea.” Peter said. “So, um, since there isn’t anything we can do, what did you want to talk about.”

Tony sighed, “Sorry Peter. Being stuck down here isn’t helpful and we can’t remove it, you could bleed out.” He said regretfully.

“This is why I didn’t say anything.” Peter said with emphasis, “It’s not worth it, if you can’t do anything.”

Tony felt a stab from that remark. “Maybe I can’t make the pain go away.” He said carefully. He moved over and sat back down next to the kid. “But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to know if you’re hurting or injured. And it’s not every time that I can’t do something. You’ve been hurt a few times since I’ve started mentoring you and you failed to mention it.” He did his best to not sound accusing the last thing he wanted was an injured super kid pissed at him while they were stuck in a confined space. “Is there a reason for that?”

Peter gave him a sidelong look before looking down where his left-hand picking at an invisible thread on his leg. He shrugged. “I didn’t think it was bad enough to mention.”

Tony looked at him incredulous. “Peter, at least one of those times you had a pretty decent concussion. And while I wasn’t the best mentor when we started this thing, you were on a plane that crashed, and I don’t mean on the inside of it. Not to mention a building fell on you. I will not believe you if you try to tell me you weren’t hurt after the Vulture.”

Peter rubbed the back of his neck. “It wasn’t too bad. I healed up in a few days.”

He threw his hands up exasperated. “That’s not ok. With your healing powers minor injuries take less than a day, so how bad was it that you took a few days?”

“Some broken ribs, mostly. I think I had a fractured wrist too. Then just bruises and scrapes. Exhaustion.” He shrugged. “I slept like sixteen hours when I got home.”

Tony shook his head. “This is the type of thing you need to come to me with. I have a whole medical staff that deals with superheroes. They treat Steve. They know how to handle advanced healing and they are incredibly discreet. On pain of legal action. And I don’t just mean the police, I’m talking Shield. So, can we agree that no injury is too small, and you’ll come to me in the future?”

Peter looked uncomfortable. “Mr. Stark, I, we…” He took a deep breath, “What I mean to say is…” But he looked away, no longer talking.

“What is it Peter?” Tony asked gently.

Peter tossed his head back hitting it against the wall. Hard enough to hurt, but not do real damage.

“Hey, none of that. You don’t need a concussion on top of everything else. And I don’t want you hurting yourself.”

Peter turned his head looking at the man and Tony could see s sheen of tears.

“Oh kid,” He said, placing a hand on his shoulder, “Whatever it is, you really can trust me.”

Peter took a deep breath closing his eyes. ‘We can’t afford it.” He stammered out.

Tony stared at him at a loss for about 5 seconds, before he said slowly, trying to wrap his mind around this kids’ innocence, “You think you have to pay for your medical care?”

Peter gave a small nod, a hand coming up to wipe away falling tears.

“Kid,” Mr. Stark said slowly wanting to break the news gently, “None of the other Avengers do.”

Peter swallowed hard, “I’m not,” he took a shaky breath,” You always say I’m not an Avenger yet.” He whispered.

Tony moved his head side to side not believing his own stupidity, “I agree junior Avenger would be more apt, but even if you’re not a full Avenger, you are my protege and that covers medical care. So, you can always,” he said with emphasis while squeezing the kids’ shoulder. “Always come to me for help with medical, or other, issues, but especially medical issues.” Tony leaned back against the wall and gazed down and the kid. “So, this is why you haven’t been telling me when you’re hurt?”

“Mostly,” he hedged. “I mean, Mr. Stark, Aunt May is very proud, and I just think she’d insist on paying. If she knew how badly I got hurt sometimes, she might not want me to be Spiderman at all and I can’t do that and then what if she…” He moved to hit his head against the wall again, but Tony got his hand there first cushioning the blow,

“I said to stop that.” The man said putting sternness into his tone.

“I just… I hate this… Not being Spiderman, but… OK. I’m not old enough to take care of myself even though with Spiderman powers I probably could and instead I have Aunt May who worries about everything. I have decathlon trips and the fact that I lose about 8 backpacks a year and she’s worried about paying for college and me just… I can’t keep making her worry. And now you want me to tell you if I’m hurt and I… I don’t want you to worry about me or… or pay for me. It’s too much and God, what if she kicks me out.” The words were a whisper and Tony was shocked that this was a worry the kid had. May and he seemed so solid. But Peter had flat out lied to her for a year and nearly gotten himself killed a couple times.

Tony moved over and reached out and pulled the kid too him.

Peter stiffened for a sec. “Um. Mr. Stark. I hate to question you, but are you aware that you’re hugging me?”

He chuckled. “Yea kid. I think we’re there. Maybe not every day.” He clarified, “But definitely in situations like this. Now, let’s break this down a bit. Medical care is part of the internship. Think of it like a job with medical benefits. May wouldn’t insist on paying when insurance covered it right?”

“I doubt it.” Peter said skeptically.

“Well then think of it like that and if she asks explain that to her. You really can’t go to a regular doctor anyway, so you really don’t have a choice in where you get your help. And I’m more than happy to provide what you need so you can continue to be Spiderman and that includes me paying for some things for you. I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable but I hope with time it will ease and you’ll trust me.”

“I do trust you” Peter insisted.

“Maybe, but money can be a hard topic for anyone. That’s not just you. It’s weird to me because I’m used to having money. Always have been. But I’ve had friends and people I’ve tried to help that didn’t want my money and didn’t think I had good intentions when I offered what I could. It’s hard on both sides of the equations. But I hope you won’t let your discomfort keep you from asking for what you need. I promise to make it as comfortable and easy on you as I can. You know, I could pay you for the internship.”

“It’s not a real internship, Mr. Stark. I’d be Spiderman even without you. I don’t want to get paid for it.”

Tony nodded, “I never wanted to be paid for being Iron Man either. Not that I needed the money, but it felt wrong.”

Peter nodded. “So much for that.”

‘Well there is something else we can do. A few things really.”

“Like what?”

“Well I could give you an actual internship and pay you.”

“I don’t want it to take away from being Spiderman, or from school. Decathlon is starting to pick up more since we won regional s and Flash is…” Peter stopped realizing what he was about to reveal. “Well I just need to work to keep my spot and not end up with more detention. No one wants that.”

Tony nodded. “Ok then an allowance it is.”

“What?” Peter said sitting up, hissing slightly, then “What?”

“I’ll give you an allowance. You can use it on anything you need to and then you don’t have to come to me to ask unless it’s out of the usual. Really, it’s the perfect solution. I’ll just give it to you weekly.”

“You can’t give me an allowance.” He looked aghast.

“Sure, I can. I’m Tony Stark.”

“Yes, you are, but, I’m not your…. I’m not earning it. And it’s something. you give to your kids Mr. Stark, not some random kid that your training to be an avenger.” “Who says?”

“Any sane person.” He practically yelled.

“Peter,” Tony said slowly, “I gave all the avengers an allowance when they lived in the tower.”

“What?” He asked eyes round.

“I said, I gave all the avengers an allowance when we lived at the tower together. Steve didn’t work, neither did the others. We were busy fighting aliens, hydra or training.” “But Captain America worked for Shield and Black Widow and Hawkeye did too,”

“Contrary to popular belief Shield isn’t really a good retirement plan and while most believe, because it was advertised as such, I wasn’t the only one who helped try to put things back together after the Battle of New York. The rest of the Avengers donated too. When they lived in the tower, we just decided it would be easier if there was money given to them regularly like they were employees and that was I wasn’t tied into it and there were no hard feelings. So, we can do the same for you. If it makes you feel better, I can give you chores around the lab to do to earn it?”

Peter sagged a bit in relief. Chores he could handle “I think I would feel better with chores. Just I can’t have it interfere with school and stuff, like I said.”

“We’ll make that part of the condition then. You usually try to finish your school work before you show up anyway, but I know you don’t always get it done until later. I know May has you finish it before patrol, but from now on, you’ll do that first before you’re allowed to work in the lab. Along with any assigned chores.” Tony shook his head, “You are like Cap in a lot of ways. He insisted on doing chores to earn his pay too. Refused to let any Avengers live there without doing their fair share. I think, I just figured since you were younger those rules didn’t work for you.”

“Aunt May gives me chores. She can’t really afford an allowance all the time, but she gives when she can.”

Tony nodded. “So, are we settled on the money issue? We can discuss how much and what chores later. I’ll have something written up that you can sign. I imagine you’ll feel better having it in writing then feeling like some adult can hold it over your head.” Peter nodded. “Thanks, Mr. Stark. And it’s no different I guess then our deal for the Philadelphia trip.” He said still convincing himself this was a good thing.

‘Don’t mention it.” He said with a nod. “But there are some other things from your statement I want to ask about, you know, since we have nothing else to do?”

Peter sighed, “You want to ask why I think she’ll kick me out don’t you.”

“I do.” Tony affirmed.

“I… It’s not anything she does exactly. It’s more that I’m difficult because of spiderman. I once turned her whole life upside down when I was seven. Now again at 15. I was there when Ben died and I’m not sure she resents that a little, her not being there for his last breaths.” His breath hitched a little. “I mean we love each other don’t get me wrong, but she’s never really gotten past his death. And now that she knows I’m Spiderman, I feel like it’s only a matter of time before she realizes I was Spiderman then. And that I could have stopped it.”

“That wasn’t your fault.”

Peter shook his head. “It was.” He insisted unable to stop the tears from coming. “We were out that night because of me. I’d been acting up and he was talking to me about that and earlier that day, I’d been out as Spiderman and I stopped a robber, but he was scared, he seemed scared and he asked me to let him go to give him a break to start fresh.” Peter wiped at his eyes, “and I did Mr. Stark. I let him go and,” he took a deep breath, “He killed my uncle.” Peters hands covered his face as he curled in on himself sobbing.

Tony didn’t hesitate to gather the kid in his arms. “Shh, it’s alright. It wasn’t your fault.” He kept saying soothing words till Peter calmed a bit. “You can’t blame yourself for that. You couldn’t have known.” “I have powers.” Peter argued.

“And last I checked it wasn’t mind reading. You could not have known. And even if you could have known, you were new to this, with no proper training. I’m guessing you were scared and in a bit of shock to have someone pull a gun on you. I hope it was the first and only time it happens.”

Peter nodded wiping stray tears away. “The worst part was feeling like I could have saved him and then having to tell May and have her try to comfort me. I decided then I had to be active in helping people and I couldn’t waste time on things like band.” Tony looked at him for a moment and then said. “Peter answer honestly, are you Spiderman because you feel guilty.”

“It may have started that way.” He said softly. My uncles murder pushed me to do this more, but I like to think if he’d lived, I would have found continued anyway.

Tony nodded. “Good, and you need to work on this self-blame. You are not responsible.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes while he absorbed what was said. “Mr. Stark, I know you say it’s not my fault.”

“It’s not.” He emphasized.

“But I still feel like it is. It’s been over a year since his death and I still can’t change how I feel.”

Tony thought for a moment, “Why don’t you try talking to someone. A professional. You have been through plenty in the last few years, it might help.”

Peter shook his head. ‘I can’t talk to them about Spiderman, Mr. Stark. It could put May in danger or me.”

Tony nodded approvingly, “Good looking out for yourself, but this is a Shield psychologist, one I believe you would like as I saw her myself.”

“Really?”

“Yea. The Afghanistan thing and events surrounding it were a bit harder on me then everyone realized. It wasn’t till well after the Mandarin that I decided to try my hand at it. It helped.” “That’s good Mr. Stark, I’ll think about it.”

Tony nodded, and it was silent again. “I believe one of us is to ask a question. So how did you and Ned meet?”

“Oh,” Peter said, “We were in second grade. It was my first day at school after my parents died. He was the only one who asked me to sit with him for lunch and then we both had the same cookies. He had a Star Wars lunch box and I had this old blue one that had belonged to my uncle and he’d used for years. Aunt May said as soon as we could she’d take me out to pick up a “cool” lunch box. But when Ned saw my sad blue lunch box that looked like an adult used it, he promised to bring me his extra one the next day. After everything that had happened recently, I didn’t really know if he would or if it was a trick, but he came in the next day with a red lunch box with iron man on it. His mom agreed I could have it.” He looked over and smiled at Tony, “I still have it. I shouldn’t tell you this, but I stash cash in it when I have extra, and it’s hidden in my room.”

“In the ceiling tiles.’ Tony smirked thinking of the homemade suit.

“No.” Peter protested and hissed when he bumped his leg.

“Let me look at that again, see how it’s doing.”

Peter nodded “No touching. Touching hurts.”

“Got it.” Tony said and pulled the phone for extra light. Then against the kids wishes he very gently touched part of the tender skin. Causing another hiss from Peter.

“I said no touching.”

“It’s how I know what’s going on. The skin is pretty inflamed.” He reached up with one hand and put it to Peter’s forehead.

“Mr. Stark.” He whined.

“I’m just checking for fever and you are definitely hot, so we will need to watch that.” Clicking on his watch he said, “Friday let Cap know that Peter is developing a fever.” A few minutes later the reply came in. “Sorry Tony, we’re going as fast as we can, but we are only a quarter of the way there.’ Tony sighed, ‘Fine but Peter says you owe us pecan ice-cream if it takes more than 4 hours.”

“Ice-cream?” Was the reply. Then a second, “Got it. See you soon.”

Tony nodded. “You too Cap.”

“Can I take more of that Motrin.” Peter asked softly.

Tony checked his watch, “It’s only been two hours.” Peter sighed, and Tony pulled his head onto his shoulder.

“So, you met Ned in second grade, and he gave you an Iron Man lunch box and that sealed your friendship forever?”

“Yea. We have been through some things together and of course he’s one of the few that know of Spiderman and what happened really happened to my Uncle. He also tells me it’s not my fault.

“And he’s right.”

“I’m trying Mr. Stark.”

Tony slipped an arm behind his back. “I know. You want to know how Rhodey and I met?”

Peter nodded against his shoulder.

“Well it was at MIT and I was younger than a lot of students there. I did a lot of stupid stuff when I was there, pranks, hitting on older girls, not showing to class then blowing the curve. Most People there knew my name – Stark. And did their best to schmooze me or get to know me based on that. They just wanted to be a part of the Stark legacy. Rhodey wasn’t like that. We got teamed up on a project to build an engine together. I showed up eating dried banana and blueberries and brought a girl with me. Making out with her in the doorway before I entered – oh and I was 15 minutes late. Rhodey walked right up to me and goes, ‘I don’t care what kind of smart ass kid you are or what your name is, if you show up late again I’ll have the professor take you off the project and maybe you don’t care about that, but I do, because I have things to do and I think having a friend as smart of you could help.”

“I straightened up after that. Well mostly. I appreciated his candor and willingness to tell me he was being friends with me because of what I could do for him.”

“That’s awful.” Peter said.

“’Maybe.” He said with a shrug, “But it was only like that a couple months. Eventually we realized we had more in common than we thought. The next year we roomed together and often we were the two instigating things on campus. It was a great couple of years. Do you think you might want to go to MIT?”

“I think if I can afford community college it will be a minor miracle.”

“I could...”

“No Mr. Stark. You know it’s amazing you have money at all. I only hear you try to give it away,”

“I just want those around me to be comfortable and if I can help with that. I will.”

“I do want to go to college. I’ve been working hard on my grades to get a scholarship.”

“Do you know your class rank?”

“Um, well, I do, but I don’t want to say.”

Tony was already clicking on his phone. “Oh look, there it is, well if I click this button.”

“What, Mr. Stark, You can’t. Please?”

“That bad.”

Peter blushed and shook his head.

“You know I’m proud of you either way, right? If you do your best that’s what matters. That’s true of Spiderman too. There is no need to be hard on yourself.”

Peter dropped his head back onto the wall. Go ahead and look.”

“You sure”

Peter nodded.

“Wow. Seriously.” Tony looked at him mouth agape and Peter didn’t think he’d ever seen him like this.

“You’re number three and not in your class, that you’re number one, but in the school number three. This is fantastic you continue like this and you will get into any place you want to go.’

“I still need the SAT.”

“You will rock it. I can tutor you or get you one and I know enough smart people it won’t cost anything. Hell, Rhodey would be qualified. Come to think of it so would Banner and Widow. Widow might teach you things you shouldn’t know – spy things. So, Banner, Rhodey or I could all help.”

“That would be good. But no matter how well I do, without financial aid I can’t do it, and I don’t want to get bogged down in student loans.”

“Well you could work for me.”

“Is your solution to just hire me for everything? You give me chores for my trip and insurance.” He said jokingly but sounding a little awkward.

“Yes.” Tony said without preamble, “Kid,” He said firmly, “You are truly brilliant. You already know the systems at the compound. I would be able to see you more often and if you go somewhere out of state the deal will start when you graduate. I pay for your school and you come work for me for twice as long afterwards. Takes 4 years you work for 8? You can work more than that, but you must work enough so I get the investment back. Also, non-compete clause no working for the competition.” Peter just stared at him not entirely sure what to say, so settled on, “You really are the best Mr. Stark.” Peter whispered. “without you I would never be doing any of this.”

“Not true. You were Spiderman before I came around.” He said ruffling the kid’s hair.

“Maybe, but not as good.”

Tony shrugged conceding his point. “So, what else do we want to know about each other. We still have plenty of time to kill.

“Have you ever had a pet?” Peter asked. They had talked about a lot, but he still felt he should be careful.

“Not really.” Tony said shuffling a little. “We had horses when I was younger. My mom thought there was prestige to it. Many of the families we had around had them, so she thought we needed them. Howard wanted her to be happy, so he bought two. I was about nine and found the things slightly terrifying because they were big. Once I got on one though I really enjoyed it. So, my father made an excuse to get rid of them a couple weeks later.”

“That’s awful Mr. Stark.” Peter thought for a moment and said, “I won a gold fish at a carnival. I um…” He blushed, “I named him Iron fish – since he was a gold fish and your outfit are red and gold. Anyway, he died after like three hours and I was super sad about it. Aunt May let us have a small funeral that ended with ice cream.”

“Did you name everything after me?”

“No.” Peter said offended. “If I had had a dog it was going to be named Han Solo.”

Tony laughed. “Nice name.”

“We, Ned and I would have called it Han.”

“Well we both got a story there even though you volunteered. But did you ever play sports.”

“Um... no.” He said decisively.” I didn’t do little league things because I was getting over the death of my parents and having to move in with my Aunt and Uncle. By the time I was in middle school I was super awkward and small. I wore glasses. Me and sports never mixed. “

“I was unaware you wore contacts.”

“Contacts?” He looked at Tony confused

“Oh no, the spider bit fixed that. Sort of how I have a six pack and a ton of strength.”

“Wow. Have you been to an optometrist since it happened?

“If I say no - am I going to see one?

“There’s a good chance of that.”

Sigh. “No, I haven’t. Aunt May just thought I decided to not wear them, and I never told her otherwise.”

Tony nodded. “Fair enough. But you will be seeing a shield ophthalmologist."

“What I thought it was an eye doctor.”

“Calm down it is. But a specialized one. I think they will be better for you and I know one personally:

“You seem to know everyone personally.” Peter said sinking back against the man.

“The money helps with that and my utter brilliance”

“How does Pepper put up with you?” Peter said then stiffened. “I mean… um… the pain is making me say things Mr. Stark I didn’t mean that.”

“Chill. I know you’re joking. It’s ok to tease me Peter. We are developing that kind of relationship. It’s part of being a mentor and mentee.”

Peter signed in relief. ‘So, did you ever play any sports?”

“As a kid I didn’t really play sports. Or play at all. My hobbies included robots and science and getting through years of school as quickly as I could. But when I got to MIT Rhodey decided to teach me boxing. Said otherwise with my mouth, smarts and money I’d never survive. I took a real shining too it. Surpassed Rhodey in those skills in the first year of school. We had fun sparring. And after seeing my dad sometimes it was a relief to go pound on something. When my parents died, I felt like I couldn’t box. Howard disapproved of it like he did everything else and why I say I don’t care what he thought for some reason on this point I did. Obadiah ended up talking to me about it. Telling me not to give up on what I love just because of a dead man. I didn’t go back to it right away but eventually I put a ring in the gym. I learned that Happy knew how to box and he’s good. We’ve spent hours down there just hitting each other.” He grinned. “There was this one time when Black Widow came. We didn’t know she was widow at the time, but she came in as a spy for shield pretending to be my secretary. So, she’s dressed in this white top pencil skirt outfit and she climbs in the ring and Happy is trying to be macho and I don’t know what he said but she climbed up him, wrap her legs around his neck and flattened him. Pepper and I sat there stunned. Happy’s pride was hurt for a month afterwards. But we got back in the ring.”

Peter said nothing but appeared to be contemplating something.

“Peter?” Tony asked.

“I, I just don’t understand.”

Tony’s eyebrows raised. “Don’t understand what? How widow took out Happy?”

“No, how you can say anything nice about Obadiah. He betrayed you. Tried to kill you. He nearly succeeded.”

“Nearly kid. That’s the take away. And yea he was a bad guy. The betrayal hurt more than anyone could ever really know. But if it hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be mentoring you or doing the work as Iron Man.” “I don’t think that’s true Mr. Stark. You are a good person and I think you are Iron man. You would have found yourself here eventually.”

Tony swallowed hard at the belief this kid had in him. “Thanks kid.” He said and ruffled the kid’s hair.

“Your welcome” he said. They were comfortably quiet for the next ten minutes and Peter asked. “Do you think you could teach me to box?”

“You want to learn boxing?” He asked in disbelief.

“Yea,” Peter said shyly.

“Kid your learning martial arts, from military and spy experts. Not to mention self-defense, why on earth would you need to learn boxing?”

“Because, we won’t always be just on Earth. I need to learn all I can.” He said with emphasis. “You can’t shield me all the time Mr. Stark. I know something is coming.”

“Pete,” He laughed it off, “nothing is happening it’s fine.”

“Don’t lie to me Mr. Stark. Please? I’m fifteen not five. You can’t protect me forever.”

“Then let me protect you why I can.” He said firmly. “I haven’t known you for long Peter, but you mean a lot to me. I… I imagine what it would be like if I had a s… a family and I think you would be a part of it.” He cleared his throat, “I’m not a sentimental man. I don’t like to discuss feelings, but well,” He shrugged

Suddenly Peter screeched his head hitting the wall behind him as he then curled towards the injured limb. Tony just managed to grab his hands before he grabbed the glass.

“Peter Stop.” Tony screamed, but Peter was crying rocking back and forth. Tony pushed himself back against the wall parting his legs in a V and pulling Peter back between them, so his back was to his chest and he could wrap him in a bear hug his hands holding Peters. Or trying, he eventually wrestled both Peter hands into one of his and pulled the kid as close to his chest as he could. “Breath kid. I know whatever is happening hurts, but you need to relax. Breath with me. He used the hand he had over the kids’ heart to help exaggerate the breaths he was taking, them both moving as one inhaling and exhaling. “Good job kid.” He said as Peter started to calm. Small whimpers escaped his mouth.

“What happened?” Peter asked.

“Not sure. I can look if you want?”

“No.” Peter said settling against the man. It was comforting, and he was afraid movement would hurt.

“Does it feel like it’s bleeding more?”

“Some.” Peter answered his teeth gritted.

“I’ll need to look Peter but if you don’t think it’s too bad, I’ll give you a few minutes.”

Peter nodded and pulled his good leg up a bit.

“Elevate your foot kid, place it on my leg.”

“But I might cut you.”

“It’s fine the glass is on the side, just be careful.” Peter did as he was told moving slowly.

“It felt like it was being cut all over again Mr. Stark. It hurt really bad.”

“Hmmm, Tony said, but said nothing more.

It was silent for few minutes and Peter said, “How long till they get here?”

Tony checked his watch, then said, ‘Friday where do we stand?”

“They are attempting to clear debris and put supports in place. Captain Rogers asks that you do your best to hang on and they will do their best to move quickly.”

Tony sighed. “Tell him I said he owes us strawberry ice-cream as well.”

“Of course, boss.”

“You don’t like strawberry.” Peter said where he laid against Tony’s chest his eye shut against the pain.

“But you and Cap both do. And Hawkeye pretends he doesn’t, but we all know he does.

Peter smiles and says, “Thanks Mr. Stark.” It was quiet and filled with meaning.

“Get some rest, it will make time go faster.” Peter nodded and closed his eyes Tony sighed as he listened to Peter’s breathing out over the next few minutes. When he was certain the boy was in that place between sleeping and awake, he gently began to play with the kids’ hair. Hoping the comforting gesture would push him over the edge.

Peter slept for the next hour or so. Tony checking him repeatably as he could feel the fever rising.

“Cap,” He said into the watch acting as his com. “We need out of here. I’m 99% sure he has a blood infection and not being able to remove what is causing it is making it worse.”

“They are almost here, Boss. Another hour or two.”

“Another hour or two, it was supposed to be four we’ve been down here for six.” And no water or food for either. “Cap you owe me.”

Tony dropped a hand down into the kid’s hair and Peters eyes fluttered opened. “Mr. Stark.” He slurred.”

“Hey kiddo, how are you feeling?”

Peter turned very pale then and pushed himself around and got sick all over the ground.

Tony winced in sympathy and put a hand on his back gently comforting till Peter stopped.

“Come on” He said putting hands under the kid’s armpits. “We’re going to move away from that.”

Peter nodded and struggled to a further away spot. Tony went looking again and found some hand sanitizer and a couple more blankets. He then let the kid “wash” his hands, took another look at the wound and felt how hot he was getting.

“I have an idea. You won’t like it.” Tony said.

“I like you.” Peter said slurring.

Tony chuckled. “That’s good since we work together. OK, unleash the suit.”

Peter gave him an odd look but did as instructed. Tony then helped him move it down to his waist. “Now lay back”.

“What, why?”

“Because the floor is extremely cold and you are extremely warm, this just might help. Besides you were on the floor earlier.” “I don’t want to.” He whined.

“Peter,” Tony said firmly, “It will help, you’ll feel better.”

“Too cold.”

“That’s the fever talking. You have chills.” Tony then put his hand on the boy’s chest and pushed backwards. He was under no illusion that if Peter was well this wouldn’t work. Peter winced when his back hit the ground and he shivered and tried to push his way back up.

“Nope” Tony said holding him gently in place. “This is for the best.”

“You’re mean.” Peter said suddenly.

Tony raised an eyebrow. “I’m mean eh? If I let an infection kill you, that’s mean. This is helping.”

Peter sniffled slightly “I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. It’s cold.”

“I know. Just get through fifteen minutes and you can sit up for a bit. You can do 15 minutes, your Spiderman”

Peter smiled but sniffled again before nodded.

Tony tapped his finger on his chin, contemplating. “Hmm” her murmured out loud.

“What is it?” Peter asked.

“Tell me something I don’t know about you.”

“I think you know it all by now with the twenty questions.” He said.

“We haven’t finished all twenty so tell me something I don’t know. Please.” He implored.

Peter sighed, shivered and scooched his way to a better position. “I was going to have a sibling.”

“What?” Tony asked surprised, “Your mom or May?”

Peter swallowed hard, the memories still hurt, “May.” He said softly, “I had just turned eleven, it was a few years after foster care, so I was well adjusted in this new family and young enough to not be jealous or annoyed at the thought of free babysitting.” He chuckled lightly, “I remember finding out about the baby. May and Ben were beyond thrilled. Ben walked around touching her stomach all the time. They would just look at each other and grin. This little precious secret between the two of them. I felt a bit left out. Wanted to be included. They sat down with me and talked everything out. That was big with May and Ben, “communication”. After the talk I was less annoyed and more excited that I’d have a little cousin/sibling. They wanted to include me and so I suggested they give him my dad’s name as a middle name, like my dad named me after Ben. Ben and May loved that name and May liked Seth for a first name so Seth Richard Parker. We couldn’t wait for him to arrive, but at around the fifth month something happened. I don’t even know what exactly. Just May was doubled over in the kitchen one minute and the next in a hospital bed and there was no more Seth.” He took a shaky breath. “There wasn’t a funeral. Just May being bed ridden and Ben staying home for a full week with us. They didn’t even send me to school, though I did have to do homework. They, uh, they tried again as soon as she was able. She got pregnant right away, but lost the baby at about 8 weeks in. We were all devastated. This time they gave it more time. A third and final attempt, when I was twelve, and the baby died at seven and a half months. She didn’t want to try anymore after that. She was different that year. Sadder. I wasn’t sure she’d ever be the same. But one day she came out of it. And then Ben happened. I guess when she had no choice she stepped up. After Ben’s funeral, she sat down with me and we talked about how she had been distant that prior year and how she would be now. She said she had been very sad losing Seth and Andrew, the two babies “old” enough to be named, but she knew that she had already been given the best child ever in getting me and she’d do everything to care for me from now on.” Peter gave a brittle smile, “The thing is they always took care of me. But miscarriages happened and Ben,” a sniffle, “Happened. It felt a little like Parker luck rearing its ugly head. Then I got bit by a radioactive spider and while the agility and eight pack are awesome, it’s not a sibling, or an Uncle. It will never bring Ben back.”

Peter almost chocked on his pain then. Tony rested a hand in his hair and stroked it gently. “You didn’t make them lose those babies Peter.” He said quietly, but with firmness. “And you didn’t cause that person to kill your uncle.”

Peter put his arm over his eyes and cried. “I want Ben.” He said a deep ache flowing through him. Words of confession he’d not said since the mugging. “God, I want Ben.” He curled sideways his forehead against Mr. Stark's leg his left hand fisted into his pant leg.

Tony stroked his hair. “I know kid.”

“It’s not fair.” A childish cry, one Peter had thought but usually didn’t bother to utter, because it made no different. But here in this room, racked with fever, the confessions came easier. Tony stroked his hair saying nothing until the kids crying eased down. Peter finally rolled back over on his back his sobs settled. “You ok?” Tony asked

“Yea Mr. Stark.” He said cheeks darkening, “Sorry for crying on you, again”

“Nothing to apologize for kid. You know, something no one knows about me?’ Peter shook his head. “It’s that when I got home from Afghanistan, I wasn’t quite right. And not in the way Obadiah thought, but I needed help. I didn’t get it right away of course, and a lot of what I did people clocked it up to how I always behave outlandishly. But I was really in a dark place. One night I went out onto the balcony and all I could think about was jumping.” Peter’s eyes widened. “I walked to the edge and stood there looking down. I put my hands on the balcony fence and thought about getting up and jumping and what the world would say. How they wouldn’t be able to deny how I felt any longer or what I had been through. Maybe they’d see my father for the abusive as… jerk that he was.”

“What stopped you?”

“You.”

Peters eyes shot up. “Well not you specifically. People like you. I knew the avengers would be needed. I knew in spite of how I felt I would be needed as well. I realized there would also be a whole new generation that needed tech and help. So, I stepped back and went inside. I found Rhodey and told him what I’d just done, and he immediately got me in touch with a Shield psychiatrist. All very discreet.”

“I’m sorry you went through that.” Peter murmured. “That was very brave of you and your secret is safe with me.”

Tony nodded. “Thanks, kid. Just promise me if a day ever comes you feel that dark, you’ll come to me or someone else you trust.”

Peter nodded. “I promise.”

“I believe you. Now let’s see about the fever.” He laid his hand against his head. “Not helping apparently. So, let’s at least try to make you comfortable.”

He rearranged the kid, with Peters help so he was leaned back against his chest leaving the light t shirt the kid wore under the suit between them. “So still awhile on them showing up though should be in an hour or two cap says. Time for a few more questions.”

Peter sighed, but said, “Dogs or Cats?”

“Both.”

“Cheater.”

“Am not it’s fine to like both. You?”

“Dog obviously.”

“How is that obvious? I mean I guess you are loyal and enthusiastic, a bit like a puppy. OK I see it.”

“Mr. Stark.” Peter whined, but he was smiling.

“Chicken or Steak?” Tony asked

“Steak.” They both said together and then grinned.

“Widow or Hulk.” Tony asked.

“Oh.” Peter said, “In a fight or to befriend.”

“Both” Tony said.

“Widow for both.”

“Really thought for sure Hulk had at least one of those.”

Peter shrugged, ‘I am a mystery.” And shifted with a whimper. He started to ask but gasped out loud and tried again to move towards injured leg. Tony grabbed him” Shhh it’s ok almost done, just breath kid, breath.”

It finally let up and Peter laid against him panting.

“That was bad.”

Peter nodded tiredly while tony stroked his hair.

“We will be out of here soon, kid. Any questions you just must ask?”'

Peter looked at him for a long moment then let out a soft sigh. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings.” He said softly

. “I’m ironman.” Tony joked, “You can’t hurt me.”:

“Just because your Iron Man doesn’t mean you don’t have a heart or that you don’t feel things.”

Tony let out a sigh, “You got me their kid, but I can handle it.”

“It’s a doozy.” He said then winced, hand clutching into Mr. Starks leg. When tony gasped in pain, he immediately moved his hand.

“Shhh,” He soothed, “it’s okay.”

“I hurt you.” Peter said sounding distraught.

“It may bruise but it will be fine. Now ask your question.”

“I really don’t think I should.”

“Peter Benjamin Parker, ask.”

His eyes widened, and he mumbled, “Why didn’t you ever have a kid?”

“Oh.” Tony said shocked. He hadn’t expected that.” That is a doozy, but it’s an easier answer then you think.” He took a deep breath, “Before I say why, I want you to agree to never talk to anyone about this unless it’s Rhodey or Pepper.”

Peter nodded, “I can do that.”

“When I was younger Howard, well he wasn’t always nice to me. I felt manipulated a lot and a lot of pressure to do better, be the best. I had no idea what a Dad was, I’m still not sure I grasp the concept. Anyway, I didn’t want to be like Howard so I did everything I could do to prevent it. But nothing permanent, just in case one day I changed my mind. Well Afghanistan took that away from me. The chemicals the arc rector came up with left me unable to have children. Though Pepper has mentioned I could adopt.”

“Oh, I’m very sorry Mr. Stark that is just awful.”

Tony shrugged, “It’s ok kid. I’m at peace with it. And it was nothing like your Aunt went through. Anyway, I didn’t want to put a kid in harm’s way and if I’m going to end up like Howard it’s better for everyone.”

“I think you’d make an excellent dad, Mr. Stark.” Peter said quietly.

Tony smiled, “Thanks kiddo.” He ruffled his hair and they sat in silent contemplation.

It was about ten minutes later when Peter shifted and said, “Mr. Stark?

“Yea kid?

“If the arc reactor made it till you can’t have kids, does that mean the radiation from the spider did the same to me?”

“Oh kid.’ Tony said pulling him close. “I don’t know, but it’s a possibility. We’ll test you if you like?”

Peter bit his lip, “I’m not sure I want to know.”

“I understand, but at any time if you want to know, I’ll make sure you get what you need, discreetly.”

“Thanks, Mr. Stark.” Peter shivered.

Tony knew the shivers were part of the infection and an indicator it was getting worse. Again, tony put his hand to the kid’s forehead and let out a low whistle. “You are blasting heat kid.”

“Cold.” He said shaking his head.

“I know kid, but we still need to cool you off.” So, he repeated the earlier steps this time removing as much of the spider suit as possible and laying him flat on the ground. When Peters whimpers became too much, Tony lay next to the kid and placed his head in the crook of his shoulder, providing comfort but letting the cold floor help reduce the fever, even if only a little bit.

“Kid how about another question? Or even just a story. Hmm? Would you like that.”

The kid shivered and gave a slight nod against shoulder. “Question?”

“Really? A question over a story. You must be delusional.” Peter rolled his eyes. “It’s more distracting then listening.”

“Fair enough.” Tony thought for a moment then said, “What do you want for Christmas.”

“I’m fifteen not five, Mr. Stark.”

Tony laughed, “Doesn’t mean you don’t have ideas.”

Peter shrugged. “I’m not big on Christmas. Not anymore.”

“Because Ben is gone?”

Peter nodded. “We didn’t celebrate last year. This year I think we were having take out and watching movies.”

“Hmm.” Tony said, “That’s hardly any way to spend a holiday. You guys could join Pepper and I.”

“Thanks Mr. Stark, but I think May would want to stay in. It’s been hard on her, even if she doesn’t show it.”

“All the more reason to get out. May and Pepper, I think would get along. We could sneak off to the lab.” He said with a smile.

“I’ll have to ask her.”

“Of course. But now back to the question, what do you want for Christmas?”

Peter hesitated then said, “I could use new shoes, another backpack and some school supplies”

“That’s all stuff you need kid. Which you will get, but what do you want?” He said with emphasis.

Peter sighed then said, “If I could have anything, it would be a PS4 and some games. Ned is into gaming and there are ways to play games together but not in the same location. I think I’d like that. Everyone at school seems to have one.” Tony nodded taking notes as he asked about games and Peter talked about the new ones and how much he wanted to play something called Fortnight.

“How about you Mr. Stark?” Peter finally asked. “What do you want for Christmas?”

Tony smiled, “Time with family and friends. A good meal maybe watch some movies or play games. The things I’m not used to doing but are good for the soul I guess.”

‘That sounds nice Mr. Stark.” Peter slurred slightly and began to whimper.

‘Shhh,” he hushed him, “It’s alright it will pass.”

Peter was hanging onto him tightly again.

When this episode was over, Peter laid against him panting. Tony brushed sweaty hair off his forehead. “You’re doing so well kid. They will be here soon, I promise.”

Tony called again to Cap and was told less than an hour. Which was good, the kid needed medical attention now. Friday could tell the infection was almost through his whole blood stream. Tony did his best too shush and soothe all while stroking the kid’s hair. It seemed to help. But Tony knew more distraction might help too, so he said, “I know we haven’t known each other long, but you’ve made a big impact on my life. I want you to know that if you ever need anything, food, clothing, money, any of it. I’ll be there for you.”

Peter remembered the first time Mr. Stark had said something like that too him. A promise. It hadn’t been quite like things were now, under duress.

Peter took a deep breath before entering the lab. It had only been about three weeks since the problem with the vulture and it was his third time meeting up with Mr. Stark for lab time.

“Hi Mr. Stark.” He said quietly, knowing the man would be in the middle of stuff.

“Hey Underoos? How was school today?” the man didn’t bother to look up. He had a pair of high-tech goggles that allowed him to see the smallest of parts and was working on an Iron Man mask.

“Um, well, um.” Peter didn’t know what to say. His day had sucked but telling his amazing superhero mentor that seemed like a bad idea. “It was fine.” He cringed as that came out and hoped Mr. Stark didn’t notice the “Fine”.

No such luck when the man turned towards him. “Fine?” he asked eye brow raised. Peter nodded since Mr. Stark could see it.

Tony’s head tilted, so Peter could tell he saw the bruise.

Tony immediately pointed to the floor in front of him and Peter stood frozen for a moment till Mr. Stark said, “Front and center spider-ling.”

Peter swallowed hard and went to the intended spot.

Tony reached back and took a cold pack from U. “Put this on, then explain how you got it. And don’t lie and say patrol because anything that size with a good night’s rest would be gone by now.”

“I wasn’t going to lie.” Peter said softly as he placed the cold pack on his eye.

“You’ve had a habit of it.” Tony said with brutal honesty.

“I thought I was doing the right thing.” Peter protested.

“Lying to me is never the right thing kid. I know I haven’t done too well in the past, but I’m committed now.” He said taking the eye wear off and setting the tool he had in his left hand and setting it on the table by the mask. “So fresh start. No more lies from you and when you call, I answer or Happy if I’m busy. But you’ll always have back up from now on. We are in this together and I’m committed to seeing you become the hero I know you can be. I imagine one day you’ll be the leader of the next generation of Avengers. We’re not there yet. But this is the starting place. This is when you decide that you accept my help and be honest about what you need and what is happening, so I can assist you. If you can’t do that, you’re wasting both of our times.”

Peter swallowed and took a deep breath, “It’s this kid named Flash.” Tony’s eyebrow raised. “I don’t feel like I should act differently just because I have the powers and I want that to be a secret. If anything happened to Aunt May…” Peter trailed off and sniffed slightly. “Any way he got some of his as… jerk friends to try to start a food fight by throwing food. Only I was the only target and an apple hit me in the side of the head. It is better than it was.”

“Some kid threw food at you?” Tony asked astonished.

“Please don’t make fun of me.” Peter said closing his eyes against what he thought would be censure for not defending himself.

“Oh, kid, no. I don’t make fun of you because some jerk of a kid decided to attack you.” He stepped forward taking the pack setting it on the counter and then beginning to inspect the bruise. “I don’t make fun of you at all. I understand why you didn’t retaliate, and you have far more patience then me. When Afghanistan happened, I took out bad guys in a small village, nearly got myself shot out of the sky, if it wasn’t for Rhodey. If this continues you tell me, OK?” Peter nodded. “OK we have work today. I’m working on a newer mask for you one that is more breathable.”

“It’s already pretty breathable.”

“This one is to try to make it breathable underwater. Even if only for short periods of time.”

“That sounds amazing.”

“It is amazing – so let’s get started.”

And that had been the first time Peter had heard Mr. Stark promised to be here for him.

“Hey Underoos you with me?” His face was being tapped lightly.

“Hurts.” He murmured. Embarrassed and achy he buried his head into the man’s chest.

“I know Kiddo, but things are looking up. Cap said less then an hour.”

“Too long.” The child slurred. “Want now.”

“Hmm apparently you just need a fever to announce what you need.”

“What?” Peter said feeling like he should feel insulted but couldn’t place it.

“Nothing kid. They will be here soon.”

“Final question, kiddo, why Karen?”

Peter looked at him a bit dazed. “Karen?”

“Your AI, you named her Karen.”

“Oh,” Peter said slowly. Then he looked a bit sheepish, “It’s a bit stupid, but I named her after my mum. Her middle name was Karen. I just know she always wanted to watch out for me, and so did the AI.” “That’s not stupid kid “Tony said running a hand gently across the boy’s forearm. “I’m sure your mom is very proud of the name.”

Peter gave a watery smile and then leaned further against Tony Letting his eyes slide closed.

They opened to a loud raucous and Hawkeye shouting.

“Down here.” Mr. Stark yelled up.

Cap cut a hole and then dropped down into the middle of the floor. One look at the kid and he yelled up “Hawk, we need to move quick, Spiderman is very ill”.

“I told you it was urgent, and he was getting worse. Is worse.”

“I know,” Steve said, “Ice cream - chocolate, I know the codes. It’s been a while since we used them. A little surprised you used them honestly.”

Tony shrugged. They didn’t normally use this system. It was meant to keep the injured unaware of how badly things were progressing, so normally children and civilians. In this case Peter knew he was injured and that it was progressing, but Tony had wanted to protect him, even if just in this small way. The infection was bad moving into life threatening by now. “He’s fifteen.” Was all he said in response.

Steve who had met Peter as a civilian seemed to understand so he nodded and said, “You want to take him out or should I?”

“You, the alien tech messes with my suit, I’m surprised Friday worked.”

Steve nodded and reached out to a whimpering Peter gathering the kid in his arms. “Let’s go.”

He handed Peter up to Hawkeye who pulled an almost unconscious Peter out and up to the roof. Steve gave Peter a boost up and then jumped and grabbed the edges himself. Once back up Steve started to take Peter, but Tony shook his head and pulled the kid to himself. Peter curled towards him fisting a hand in his shirt. Tony soothed him till he settled.

Steve cleared his throat. ‘We should go.”

“Right.” Tony said, and they headed out of the building.

Once on the ship they moved Peter to the clinic area. Bruce was waiting with supplies.

“He going to have problems since it was alien tech? “

“Probably not. We didn’t find anything wonky in what we found.” Bruce said.

“Good then.” Tony said.

“I need to remove this but first I’m going to knock him out.” Bruce continued. Tony nodded and leaned over and explained to a feverish Peter what the situation was. But he was too out of it. Bruce hooked up some antibiotics and saline then knocked the kid out.

Peter faded in an out for a while, after the initial knock out. He heard voices and tried to call out to the people around him, but no one came. Parker luck he thought.

“What’s that spider-ling? Came a soft soothing voice, and hands that wrapped around his hand.

“Said out loud, thought said silent. Parker Luck.”

“Parker luck makes you say things you don’t mean?” Tony asked confused.

“No, it makes bad things happen.”

“So, you think by being a Parker your bad luck”? Peter nodded solemnly.“When you’re better we will discuss that. Because that is not true.”

Peter shook his head, “Is too.” He muttered childishly.

“That’s not a sound argument,” The man pulled the blankets up over him, that he’d kicked off.

‘Now rest. You’re still fighting off infection.”

“Stay?” he asked simply. “Of course.” His eyes closed, and sleep came almost instantly.

It was hours later, Tony standing at the doorway to the hospital bed. They had been back at the facility for a few hours and May was already here making a fuss over her nephew. Tony had gotten an earful for him getting hurt, not that it was his fault, not that either of them didn’t blame himself.

“How are you doing?” He asked walking it.

Peter looked up his eyes glossy. “Heya Mr. Stark.” He greeted enthusiastically.

“Well I see someone has found the morphine drip.”

“See,” Peter said holding it up proudly “You just click, and good things happen.” He murmured.

“I think you’ve had enough, he said walking around the bed and removing the pump from his hand. Peter grabbed his hand and then held it up and ran his cheek over it. “Soft Tony, warm Tony, Iron ball of fur,” he sang softly still petting himself. Tony chuckled, “You are lucky I don’t allow any recording devices in these rooms.”

“A shame really.” May chuckled, ‘He’d do anything we ask for a very long time.”

Tony grinned, “Well I practically have an idyllic memory. I’m sure the details I know would do wonders.”

May laughed the sound light, “Sorry for yelling earlier. I was just worried.” Peter now was playing with a small ball shaped item that he’s procured from May’s purse, completely distracted. “it’s understandable.”

“Maybe, but I know how much you mean to him and how much he looks up to you.”

“See, I have to look up.” Peter said face turning to Tony’s with a wide grin. “Looking up at Tony.”

“Finally get you to start calling me Tony – requires one serious infection and a morphine drip.

” “It’s the blood loss.” Peter pipped in.

“You didn’t lose that much, you called me Tony now you’re stuck with it.”

“Mr. Stark.” Peter sing songed. “Soft Mr. Stark, warm Mr. Stark…”

“Nope, won’t answer to that, not anymore”

“Hmm, I’m tired.”

“Then rest Underoos.”

May raised an eyebrow.

“I like nicknames.” Tony said. When her eyebrow went up, he said, “For other people.”

“Ah. I wonder if that’s why he calls you Mr. Stark.” May said, “It’s his nickname for you. And it annoys you so double win for him.”

“Hmmm I believe he is that clever, but he’s too consistent to be a joke.”

“You’re just Mr. Stark.” Peter mumbled from the bed nearly asleep.

“It’s OK whatever you call me Peter. Just curious why it’s Mr. Stark and not Tony.”

Peter rolled onto his side, so he could look up at him. “it’s lots of reasons honestly. I respect you. You’re my mentor. Calling you Tony feels too personal. Not that we don’t get along, just what if something happened to you. Mr. Stark is safer.” And Tony knew this was the most honest answer he would ever get from the kid on this.

“Thanks, Underoos, but feel good sleepy time is here.” He gave a gentle push to the morphine drip and then smoothed the blankets over the kid.

May and he headed out as soon as he was asleep. “You have a way with him Tony. One I haven’t seen him let be filled since Ben.”

Tony shrugged, “It’s nothing.”

“Don’t do that Tony. That kid loves you or wants to but is scared to let it be true. Today might help get him to really let himself care about you, as well, a father figure.” “Whoa, May, I’m no dad. Howard was a jerk. He…. Well he wasn’t a dad. I can be his mentor, but I can’t parent him.”

“You already are. You give him advise, punish him when he’s doing something stupid or at least threaten too, and you care about him.”

Tony wanted to protest but he did do all those things. “Right.” He said a little chocked up at the idea. “It’s a little scary how alike the kid and I are. I just can’t imagine this is a good idea” “Welcome to my world.” May said with a laugh. “But you discover more and more ways to love him as it continues.”

Tony nodded. “You are staying the night.”

May nodded. “He doesn’t like to be alone like this and probably shouldn’t be. Even with all your oversight.”

“Oh, I meant what I said earlier no recording devices allowed.”

“That’s smart. But means even more that one of us should stay with him. And since you’ve had enough shocks for a day, it will be me.”

Tony nodded, “Thanks. Have a good night and if you need anything, absolutely anything, just push the buzzer.”

“Thanks Tony, Rest well.”

Tony nodded and then headed for his lab.

When he came to Peter’s room the next day the kid was in jeans and a funny pun t- shirt. “Hey Crocket, how are you feeling?”

“I can’t be Crocket I didn’t do anything dangerous.”

“You went into a building that was half blown up, so I’m going to have to say your wrong.”

“Technicality.” Peter said with a smile.

“Seriously though, how are you feeling?”

Peter took a moment to assess then said, “I’m doing much better. The doctor said the infection is almost gone. Between modern or a little further then modern medicine and healing patterns I’m good to go. May went to pull the car around. I was going to come see you before I left, but you were here.”

“Well I’m glad you’re feeling better.” Tony took a deep breath, put his hands in his pocket and rocked a little on his feet. ‘All that stuff we said yesterday, it’s safe with me kid. You can trust me, with injuries, money trouble, school issues, hell even girl issues. I just want you to be aware that whenever you need something, I’m one of your people.”

Peter looked at him a slightly teary look, “Is that so?”

“Yep.” He popped the P.

“Ok then,” He said, then half his lip curled into a half smile, “Tony.”

Tony smiled back. “You’re going to be held to this new standard kid.”

“I know, Tony.” He said emphasizing his name. He grabbed his bag. “Well I need to meet May.”

“Yea. We meet again on Saturday. stay out of trouble.”

Peter nodded and hurried off.

Tony rocked again on his feet as he watched the kid leave. Maybe with the right kid, he really could be more than a mentor and perhaps even a dad. He smiled to himself then headed off to find the other Avengers.

[papersynth]

The Feud breakdown theory

TLDR: Its basically one big Klance-centric episode, this whole theory’s probably a reach but its nice lol. Reposted from my twitter. More under the cut!

Lets start off this thread by pointing out one of the glaring things that immediately hit me once I started watching this episode when it aired: the title sequence. I'm not particularly old but my parents have always loved gameshows and reality television.

They would watch it in the living room and so one of the things that stuck out to me the most was how the logo for Garfle Warfle Snick is visually similar to "The Dating Game" which was a 60's TV show centered around a bachelorette picking out a guy to take out on a date.

Even the dang flowers.....

It was at this moment I thought "well, after being basically deprived of any Klance scenes for 3 seasons, you'd think S7 would bring you some of that and boy oh boy I've been fed so well. I think its strange for them to visually replicate a DATING GAMESHOW logo. We know for a fact that they were going for a family feud esque style, so why didn't they just replicate the Family feud logo instead? The vibe of the entire episode would change because it'll be a glaring reference.

Going back to Kaplan's tweet about how things aren't what they seem, the Feud really, like, obviously lets you know, that things really aren't what they seem. The story shifts in focus and tone and so do the characters.

My theory is that this episode foreshadows events to come that even the paladins never knew were even challenges themselves.

I believe this sort of aids the Klance fight theory (graciously written by Ca HERE) because that altean colony which they believe was a win for them to discover, could possibly be their next challenge (their garfle, becomes a warfle)

We also know that it isn't new for Voltron to use the "it was an altean all along!" as shock value for their enemies but at this point, I think Allura's starting to learn that her race is equally capable of evil.

This adds to the idea that during the 3 year gap, there's a possibility that the altean colony and Haggar/Galra have been working together to develop new technology (Hunk: I've never seen the Galra use weapons like these before) because clearly it isn’t the olkari helping them.

Time for my biggest reach yet, how the fuck is that a chopstick lance. You can recognise a mullet for a hundred feet away but you can't recognise a sword at point blank. Strange considering Keith drew out the sword pretty quickly, so there's no way Lance saw chopsticks.

NOTHING in this image screams chopsticks. I even went and printed out this god forsaken screencap and tilted it to see if it looked like chopsticks from a far angle and nope, still looks like a blade. This one's a reach but, chopsticks are insinuate a "yin-yang" dynamic.

Chopsticks is a strange pick because it doesn't LOOK anything like a chopstick. It would have made more sense to call it a shovel, paper fan, knife, surfboard etc. Go off. Chopsticks have always been used as a pair, one cannot exist without the other, which brings me to voltron's wings. I like the idea of Voltron being similar to Darling in the Franxx because of their mecha designs kinda taking reference from Evangelion. This is a reach definitely, but its cute whatever, eat this up. There's a mythical bird called "Jian" and it only has one wing.

The bird can only exist with another of its kind, where together, they can fly and soar. Wings and duality are symbols that have ALWAYS gone hand in hand, simply because there are two. Chopsticks being Lance's stupid fucking word choice is so damn specific its hurting me.

HERE'S ANOTHER REACH Y'ALL, the reason why chopsticks are thicker and circular at the top but thinner and squared at the bottom is because they represent the heaven and the earth. WHERE'D THEY COME FROM Y'ALL. WHERE DID THE PALADINS GO? UH? BACK TO EARTH YEA?

And once again, Keith draws this one very quickly so it does show that Lance can make a good guess immediately. I can see why he would say Dog here. SO WHY COULDN'T YOU SEE A BLADE AT FIRST LANCE? EXPLAIN YOURSELF. MOVING ON FROM THE DAMN DRAWING GAME.

I think these two screenshots speak for themselves. Earlier this morning I wrote a theory about how the Klance dynamic is all over the place because Lance has grown as a person in his absence and he's confused as to how he's supposed to behave towards "new keith".

He takes a jab at Keith throughout the start of this whole episode

"Not my fault keith can't draw!"

"I'm not a mind reader!"

So once again, its the usual bickering coming from Lance, but we see that shift later in the episode, I'll get to that later.

The next game with bii boh bi. Funny to me how the game's called "The Garflator" when we've already established that "Garfle" means to "win". The monster isn't the Garflator as they've misleaded, its the tank.

If you don't believe me, here's the subtitles literally calling the monster the "Warflator". Strange isn't it? You miss these things when you watch it the first time. Bob wasn't joking when Warfle and Garfle were interchangeable.

I don't really want to analyse how Bii Boh Bi acts throughout the whole segment mainly because I think that's reaching a little too far, and it was likely comedic the entire time, but I can't help but notice that his tone throughout suggests a "fill in the blanks" situation.

My theory is that this situation foreshadows the possibility that someone will help Lance fill in the blanks, and guess what the answer is in the GARFLator. He might even really be running out of time so again, stick it out till the last episode of S8.

Bonus: Seems like its pretty nice isn't it. Our crops are watered and his skin is cleared. Joking of course, but overall the whole Garflator/Warflator situation keeps getting mixed up together that's why I think this theory's reaching but I digress.

Time for the scene that made all of us Klancers scream into the depths of hell. We all already know that they didn't have to vote for each other if it was meaningless, but after seeing the recent surplus of Lance being hurt by Keith leaving, I've got a solid theory.

Lets look at the scene first, mainly at Hunk and Pidge's faces. We know Hunk is emotionally observant while Pidge behaves logically, so I think when we're speaking logically: Lance picking Keith seems HIGHLY illogical to pidge.

Lance "hates" Keith. Why pick him to survive? THE MATH DOESN'T ADD UP. On the other hand, Hunk's facial expression here seems more....worried? Not confused. There's been substantial evidence that Lance was hurt by Keith leaving, and if he spoke to anyone about it, it'd be hunk.

I think Pidge is surprised to hear these things come out of Lance's mouth and seeing Keith pick him. Remember when they all picked someone to help Lance? The braniest of the team? I think honestly Pidge might be the first to pick up on their possible affections towards each other.

This sort of parallels the earlier scene where Lance was the last one to figure out Pidge was a girl, but maybe that's reaching a little too hard (Curse these short arms!)

Earlier this morning I wrote a thread about how Lance picking Keith to leave here is probably the nail in the coffin that he deeply cares about Keith. Remember, this situation would probably be the third time that Keith has left Lance.

Read the linked thread, I won't reiterate it here but basically Lance grows in Keith's absence, stepping up when he needs to, but its not really what he wants. Losing Keith again might be devastating, but that only heightens why this scene is so affectionate. He makes this choice himself.

He calls Keith the future because he has faith in his skills (he's our leader) and him as a person (plus he's half galra). That Keith HAS a future. This is SIGNIFICANT because the only other person that has said that they have faith in Keith, was Shiro.

Shiro is VALUABLE to Keith, he's the most important person in his life. Having people believe in him has always been difficult and I think where Lance says (although cryptically) that he believes in Keith, is really where their new dynamic takes off.

THAT's why Keith behaves somewhat coldly in S7, because its never gonna be easy for him to suddenly accept a new person in his life. He’s not sure how he should react to another person caring for him. Both of them know their dynamic isn't what it used to be, they can't joke and jab anymore. We're back to square one, but its different this time.

One last thing about this episode (that isn't Klance related) is Luxia's kingdom, just a fun quick thought that maybe the Baku might be back, i mean he never really was defeated, just trapped. ;)

Uhhh that's it! Can't think of anything else haha. Thanks for the wild ride friends, I hope these feed your optimism for today~ Again, they're all just theories but I hope S8 is a good experience for everyone! Have a great day :)

One last thing: I would love it if Klance happens and the theories prove true, and if it doesn't its okay! Sure I'll be disappointed, but its fine if I'm wrong about a fictional TV show lol.

[royal-writer]

Love Her Softly

hnnngg i’m mcfuckin falling asleep but you get the point i guess

softness =/= weakness

-

She was a vision of the most serene beauty and generosity. A glowing smile to go with her shining complexion. He could see the brightness of appreciation and warm in the man’s face, looking upon her. He could see the echoes of pain in her own; the tiredness, the way she stood rigid to pretend as though her limbs were not sore from the battle hard fought. Yet she still held tender to the man’s hand; still insisted on wrapping the gentleman’s fingers around the small satchel of her coin she placed in his palm.

There was no room in his heart to doubt. Essätha’s very existence was the traveling sun, breaking through clouds to bring light to the earth. She gave him the infinite hope of tomorrow. If she could live and breathe and fight through the hardest days, so could he. If surviving the worst of humiliation and agony life had to offer through hate and war meant waking to another day to see her smile, he’d put up the hardest fight possible. Anything, if only to have a moment to agonizingly pray she would allow him to hold her even so he could feel whole and soak his fondness in her autumn skin. Just to see her be was enough to change his world and make him see it from a perspective of beauty.

It brought him equal parts joy and fear then, to think that just a passing glance or word she said could make someone fall in love with her. Amon had no doubt it was possible. She was captivating. Her smile, her laugh, the way her nose wrinkled when she quirked her mouth deep in thought, how her eyes were like the rays of sunflower in dappled lighting. If the Gods had an image of perfection; they had made it, and placed the most blessed soul of thoughtfulness and love to reside inside of her.

Essie was profoundly easy to adore. She made it effortless. It was easy, when you saw the purity of her actions, and not feel touched just to be in her presence.

She patted the man’s hand who, begrudgingly, accepted the currency, and moved on to speak to one of the adjacent fellows to him in an equally polite voice and mesmerizing gesture of hands. They appeared rather shy and taken aback by her. The nobleman was understanding how they had so much trouble keeping eye contact. It was like looking directly at the sun when staring at her; blinding, radiant, alluring.

A snort to his left escaped a townsman with crossed arms. They elbowed the individual on their other side, speaking in a hushed tone: “Ever seen a woman hold a man’s hand like that?”

“Oh yeah. When they’re single, and not such bitter nuisances,” the later man chuckled.

Glowering, Amon slide his weary gaze upon the duo.

“None too wise is she?” the former snickered. “She’s got a lot o’ heart, I’ll give her that. Too much though. The weak one’s suffer the most. She’ll never last.”

He unclenched his jaw, and sharply cleared his throat to capture the twosomes attention. They whipped their heads towards, splotches of flushed markings creeping up on one’s face with embarrassment upon being overheard.

“Miss Meduza is far more insightful and compassionate than either of you two give her credit for,” Amon crisply informed them with a narrow-eyed gaze. “If either of you had half as much foresight, you’d see how much strength it takes for her to be so kind and selfless. It is her spirit and tenacity and makes her so brave. She is strong because she is willing to be soft. Nothing about her should ever be described as weak.”

“That’s a righteous sentiment,” the former grumbled, clearly unconvinced. “But bein’ sweet isn’t goin’ to win her anything. Not in this world, anyway.”

“Nothin but heartache, at least,” the later murmured with what sounded sympathetic.

Such lowly, rancorous individuals would never understand. They’d never see behind their pessimism and anger at the world that some people could be made of starlight; whose souls would not be beaten and twisted to as nasty and vindictive as the rest of the world. They would never be able to appreciate a woman of such grace, and Amon truly pitied any partner these sort ever fell into. They would never be truly loved and appreciated; always nagged, viewed for their faults, seen as ‘the best they could do’. They were people who could never be happy.

While they could blissfully live ignorant, he was not going to let precious moments be spent lonely and jaded. He was going to walk right into that luminous sun and bathe in the unspoiled pools of streaming light. He wanted the true strength and power of a woman true to herself and her beliefs than he wanted anything else. No lies. No fantasy smiles. Something real, and tangible. Someone who knew the world could be cold, and cruel, and still fought tooth and nail for the right things; for justice, for the rights of others, for joy, and for the possibility of a better future.

Essätha was all that and more.

Ignoring the disgruntled staring and uncomfortable thinness of the air that suffocated all happiness in their realm, Amon pardoned himself with barely an uttered excuse. He was not going to waste his breath on people who could not see halos and the divinity of angel wings on people who sacrificed and were beat down time and time again, to rise up and still offer a hand. The admiration he had for her, still being able to smile, after all they’d seen; after what she had to live through, after all the fights they’d barely crawled away from, she was truly someone special.

As she gestured with her hands in animated motions, Essätha’s eyes tracked sideways to the movement of his approach. Her expression lit up with a brilliant smile that she could not erase as she almost dreamily tried to finish what she was explaining to the man before her. Every so often her glance shot right back towards him as she spoke. Maybe he should feel guilty for stealing her attention, but being her distraction had its own kind of thrill.

It should not be such an adrenaline rush to be noticed by her. He was a junkie, an addict, getting his fix every time she recognized him. Any time she noticed him. Dammit, he should be humiliated from wanting her attention; but he craved the shades of her smile and aura surrounding her like nothing else.

“Oh, that must have been something to behold, miss,” the man responded to her in earnest, his gaze turning respectfully. “Oh Amon! Gods bless you sir, thank you for your assistance as well.”

As the townsman extended a hand, the nobleman accepted it in a firm grasp, and generous shake.

“Sorry to have intruded on your conversation,” the Illiad replied.

“Think nothing of it!” The man shook his head. ��You are just as much warranted to our gratitude and attention, my lord.”

A humorless dry laugh escaped him. He reached unconsciously for Essie’s hand, finding her fingers slipping into his seamlessly as she met him part of the way.

“It’s… just Amon,” he uncomfortably expressed; continuing on with far more charming warmth, “I’m afraid you’re wrong, there. There’s no one more deserving of your thanks than miss Essätha.”

A twinkle entered the man’s gaze, and he puffed up. “Oh I do say! I am surprised your friends to humbly offered to help fund to rebuild the barn.”

He arched a brow, casting a long glance in Essätha’s direction. Her cheeks were pink, and she refused to meet his gaze. Certainly this was the first time he heard they’d all pitched in any coin. And judging by her discomfort, he had a good feeling that the donation had entirely been out of her pocket.

“Oh, yes,” he smoothly responded, digging into his coin purse. “I had forgotten to add my benefits to the pool. My apologies.”

“M’lord-” Essätha exhaled, tugging on his arm.

He passed her a wink, and watched the color in her face grow deeper before he turned back to place some of his own coin in the confused man’s hand.

“Most gracious, my lord! Thank you!”

“It’s just Master Amon now, thank you.”

As the man turned, showing his companion the added funds, the nobleman turned his sly glance upon the glowering lady at his side, her face blushed so deeply it made her ears pinkish too.

“Why did you do that?”

He smirked at her horrified tone. “Why do we do anything?” he countered, “Or moreover: why did you do it first?”

She jumped slightly, turning her gaze away. Her nose was scrunched up a little like it did when she was frustrated about something.

“You didn’t have to do that,” she mumbled.

“No. But it feels like the right thing to do. If you can show a good example, why can’t I follow?”

Her teeth worried on her lower lip. The flex of her fingers worked against his grip. He waited for her to find the words to say; or for the combative nature to show itself. It surprised him when she couldn’t muster up something to fend off his praise with, so he took it a step further, squeezing her hand delicately.

“You didn’t need prove your heroics; or how much you care, anymore to these people once the job was done,” he responded. “You are a one-of-a-kind woman, Essie. Not many people have a heart a fraction of a size of yours. You really do aspire others to do better, to be kinder, to listen more, and to show that strength is not just muscle. That strength can come in all forms of will and character.”

Dumbfounded, she gawked at him with a mild haze of shock. She ducked her head aside shyly, rather than face him as he turned the spotlight directly on her.

Was it possible to revere her more, seeing her tongue-tied and shy?

As another townsfolk reached for his hand, babbling a high-speed rush of thankful words, he was forced to tear his gaze away from Essätha’s sheepish smile.

But he felt embrace of her hand in his increase suddenly, and it was one of the best ‘thank you’s he’d ever felt in his life.

[euphemeria]

We Fall Like Car Crashes

His only sin was loving. Loving like a human.

Inspired by Car Crash by Anna Nalick. Take some time to listen to it.

When Eren witnesses a car crash for the first time, he watches it all play out in slow motion, devoid of emotions for he already knows none of the humans involved will live. Only after they have lain their eyes close, Eren will be there to greet their souls and take them to Heaven. And he does this all with detached interest for this is a task he has been assigned since the first mountains rose from the very Earth.

As of late though, something, or someone, has been melting his stoicness.

An archangel of war and storms, Levi.

With wings as dark and domineering as his namesake, the archangel commands the 104th sphere with unyielding strength and devotion. He leads them all into battle with unwavering ferocity, rallying every one of the angels, as they push the demons back further into their dominion.

In the end, they'll always win with Levi, who even in bloodshed remains beautifully untarnished.

Off the field though, the archangel's defenses are impenetrable.

Admired by many, his devotion to his duties and undying love for God captures all his attention and time. There is no room for anyone or anything else. Eren can't help feel a clenching coil around his core every time he thinks about this.The angel doesn't think much about it though.

Although when he returns to his duty's off the field, they plague him constantly.So much, that when he prepares to let go of the hand holding onto the human souls, he can't help but ask them,

"What is love?"

"Were you loved?"

"Is it painful?"

"Why do you cry?"

"What can I do to help?"

"Is there anyone you're thinking of right now?"

"Did you love them?"

"Do you love them?"

"Why do you still love them?"

"Even in death you'll love them?"

His duties became more than just a task given to him by a higher order.

Eren began visiting the loved ones of those he carried to heaven. He watched their anguish send them into misery and destruction. He puzzled their feelings for the dead. He talked to some, listened to their woes. And most important, he parted to them final words uttered by their passed loved ones.

So every time he delivered the messages, Eren would feel that same clenching feeling creep up. However, it was a different kind of experience. It was almost warm and fulfilling, especially when he saw the solace that these humans found in words left by the dead.

Soon enough, his mundane duties began having a more deeper meaning than he ever thought he'd come to find.

However, his latest pursuits did not go unseen. Word from above came to Levi, warning him about the dangers one of his angels has been getting himself into. His behaviors were digressing from his original duties, and he needed to be stopped.

A responsible general, the archangel knew every angel in his garrison. He especially knew an Eren more than he let on.

When Levi first met the 104th squad protecting the 104th sphere, the archangel's eyes were immediately drawn to an angel with eyes like Earth.

It was as if God recreated Earth in the eyes of that angel—where there was light and dark on the first day, firmament the second, lushness and seas third, sun and stars fourth, beasts fifth, and humanity the sixth and final day.

Levi knew when he first laid eyes on that angel, he would be doomed. Just like God loved his creation, he would love this creation. But Levi cannot love, he cannot love anyone else but God. In God he loved and served, and Eren was just a heavenly spiritual being (puuuns) made to tempt him like Samael tempted Eve. The archangel was not naive.

The ever capable subject of God though, Levi succumbed to God's will. He approached Eren first, under the guise of acquainting himself with every angel in the garrison. And the more Levi convened with the younger angel, the more enraptured and defenseless he became.

Eren was even more like Earth than he thought—his whole being alive and beautiful. Before his soul used to be a dimly colored haze of fumes, but now it was brighter than anything the archangel had ever seen in his whole existence. He was falling deeper into the despair without knowing.

With every laugh, every look, every touch. Levi fell. He would do anything for this being before him. He'd even betray his maker, for his love was no longer with God, but the angel, Eren.

Corrupted to the point of no return, the higher order had no choice but to send Erwin, the angel of order, to restore the balance.

Erwin, with his looming white wings the size of an entire sphere, will not judge Levi and Eren's crimes, but he will inform the younger angel of his crimes. As a young angel who rose through the ranks with Levi, he didn't not wish to see his compatriot succumb to a mere youngling's naivety.

"He will be cast out of heaven with you for your crime is his crime too."

Eren could not understand his sins. He served God. He followed his order. He fought with his sisters and brothers. He was a loyal subject.

Laying his crimes before him, Erwin corrected him.

"You have served humans. You followed their orders. You fight not for Heaven, but humanity. You are not loyal to Heaven, but humanity. And you love, just like humanity, when you should love only God as a loyal subject. Because of your greed, you will not only cast yourself out of Heaven, but a valuable subject as well."

Erwin need not say anymore, for Eren finally understood after that.

"I loved wrong, and therefore I shall die like those I reaped..."

The archangel of judgment did not correct him.

"But what of Levi? What is his judgment? Why should he fall?"

"He loved wrong too."

The same clenching that was not warm and pleasant returned like a vice. Was this what humans felt when lost someone? Was this what they called, grief?

"But love is like a spell, youngling."

Eren looked up at Erwin.

"It is easily broken by death. Just like those you reaped, they so readily accepted Heaven as their salvation because love held no meaning beyond death. Those that held on to love only held on because they were alive. In death, love cannot touch you anymore."

Realization dawning on him, Eren understood what the archangel was here to tell him.

Eren was at fault. Touched by humanity, he was acting like a human more than a servant of God. And because of that, he unwittingly dragged Levi into all this. Only his death could set his lover free.

But Eren had tasted greed, and he did not wish to part with Levi. He loved the archangel with his entire being. He loved him with a ferocity unparalleled, by his servitude to even God. Eren would not part with Levi.

"What do you see looking out the edge there?" The dark brooding archangel asked one day.

Eren kept his eyes below him, watching the car that would no doubt wreck itself with that other car across town running red lights and stop signs.

"Car crashes are messy."

Levi's puzzled look pushed Eren forwards.

"I have escorted every soul to heaven like a good child. But when it involved those in a car crash, I hesitated. Without crime, they suffered needlessly. Those innocent suffered only because they were involved. They didn't need to die like they did..."

"Eren."

The angel turned to appraise his lover.

"Levi. I love you."

"I love you too."

Eren merely shook his head. Levi didn't love the same as him. He didn't love where his whole being felt like it was being crushed from some unseen force. He didn't love the way he smiled softly as if telling a secret. He didn't love the feel of his calloused hands brushing against any available skin. He didn't love how warm he was, yet how cold he could be. He didn't love the way his lips felt when they shared breaths. And he especially didn't love the way Levi looked at him sometimes, as if he was the Earth himself.

Levi didn't love like a human, like Eren did. Levi loved him like a spiritual being loved God. Levi didn't love him for who he was, he loved some sort of idea of him. Although his gaze was devoted and sincere, his feelings were not compassionate or affectionate.

"When you fall, do you think it'll be like a car crash?" Eren wondered.

"What are you talking about, Eren?" Levi's eyes widened.

Eren smiled bitterly. Was the spell lifting now that he was approaching death?

As soon as he jumped off edge, would the fall kill him? He wouldn't be reaped, right? What was death for angels?

Eren had so many questions all of a sudden now, but they did not scare him. He feared not death, but living now.

Leaning over, Eren ghosted his lips over his lover's one last time. Just brushing, without touching. "I'll love you even in death."

And Eren fell.

Angels aren't suppose to love anyone else except God. Eren learns to love from the humans he observes though, and falls for Levi (haha, pun-pun). It's uncertain if Levi loved Eren like Eren loved Levi though. Also if you didn't pick up on it: Even though Erwin tries to trick Eren into falling, saying how love cannot touch the dead—Eren knows better. Because all those messages he delivered were of undying love.

[i-need-you-means-i-love-you]

The Longest Post I’ve Made On Here

Destiel is is such an intriguing and complex relationship because it is always changing. Both the characters go through so much person growth and development, it’s impossible for the relationship to stay the same. Their roles to each other, to their family, to the rest of the world is always changing.

For example: in the very beginning Castiel was this astounding, majestic figure that Dean couldn’t help being astonished by, even if he tried to downplay it. He may not be an archangel, or a god, but when he first appears, he does so as the show’s first resemblance of something divine and holy. A whole new level of power. He brings with him the idea of Heaven, of a God, of creatures who supposedly didn’t even exist until Cas arrived and changed everything Dean thought he knew. This was before Cas had Fallen, or been cast out by Heaven, or had lost his powers for any amount of time, so to Dean he might as well have been invincible.

As we know, this brought a lot of sexual tension to the relationship.

The attraction definitely started as physical, on both sides. This continued for many, many seasons.

But they start to form an emotional connection as well, a “profound bond” as Cas elegantly puts it. Cas starts to open up to Dean, accidentally-or-maybe-not revealing that he’s not as heartless and robotic as the other angels. This helps Dean see Cas as more like a human, like an equal.

Than we have 5x04: “The End”. One of the greatest milestones of Destiel. In this episode, Dean finally realizes how much Cas means to him, which is when we get this expression:

Zachariah’s purpose of sending Dean into the (destroyed) future is to show him how awful the world will be if Lucifer isn’t defeated, and the message hits home- hard, and Endverse!Cas is what hits Dean the hardest. The relationship is still at the point where Dean still sort of revels Cas, holds him up on a pedestal as a representation of all things powerful and glorious. Then he goes into the future and sees this angel, this creature he has held so highly in mind, shattered- addicted to pills, having sex for no reason, so broken by his own failure that he can’t even bear being sober- and all because he stayed by Dean. Because he refuses to leave Dean. He see Castiel fall the furthest from himself, and that’s what breaks him. Which is why he’s nearly crying when he comes back to find present Cas and where this quote comes in:

But of course he changes. How could he not? Because as awesome as Castiel is with his powers and his wings and his blades, he still has a lot to learn. He can still be stuck-up and dangerously stubborn and short-tempered. It’s the little human moments of Cas we love the most, the ones that come more and more often as he spends time away from Heaven and with the Winchester family.

But the thing about humans- they’re broken. They feel too many types of pain. They hide themselves behind anger or humor or both. They lie to their loved ones. They’re haunted by their pasts. They also care more about each other than they do themselves- to an extent that can be both irrational and dangerous. Cas is witness to this plenty of times when he sees what Sam and Dean will do for each other.

So it does make sense that in Season 6 he turns away from the humans for a while.

He goes back to Heaven to fight their civil war. Remember, he’s a soldier, first and foremost. He actually was quite a legendary leader before... well, before Dean. But he has his duties. His is at the service of Heaven. That leads him away from Dean- and everyone else- both physically and emotionally. And of course Dean notices the changes.

And Cas is unhappy with Dean too. The other angels (and other creatures) are already mocking him for being the “Winchesters’ pet” and it doesn’t help that they call him at the most inconvenient times, with no regard for his schedule and responsibilities. He is at war; in his mind, his job is a lot more important than whatever trouble the boys have gotten themselves into so far.

And his war is important. The Winchesters aren’t the only important figure sin his life; he does have some close friends among the angels. And they are dying. Remember, he’s not just a footsoldier; he’s also a leader. Every death he sees as his fault. His need for the war to end rises to desperation. The Winchesters were the ones who taught him desperate times call for desperate measures. Turning to the dark side for the sake of helping “the greater good” is a very human thing to do, and working with Crowley probably never would’ve crossed his mind if he hadn’t been introduced to the human way of problem-solving.

Not that he particularly enjoys working with Crowley.

And he knows it’s wrong.

And Dean knows it’s wrong (even though he’s worked with Crowley too) but he tries to deny it to the very last second, bristling at Bobby and Sams’ accusations, reacting with hurt instead of outrage when he learns the truth.

And Cas almost breaks- almost. Because he remembers what he and Dean were. But not quite. Instead he tries to warp it around and blame Dean for his actions.

A very human action- twisting a situation so someone else is to blame, so you don’t have to face your own horrible mistake. But when Dean forcefully tells him, “No, I was there. Where were you?” he realizes he can’t get out this easy.

This isn’t the first Destiel fight, but it was the first one that really cut a whole out of my heart. That image Dean had been trying to keep of Cas- holding on so desperately to this picture of grace and beauty- had crumbled. He realized Cas was no more pure or right than a human- than him- and that was terrifying. Enough to drive a titanium wedge between them for the rest of the season.

This is also the first time we see of Castiel that he really sinks to this level of raw desperation- something the Winchesters have dealt with countless times. The contrast between how he deals with it and how the brothers deal with it is amazing. The main theme of the show is family, and how family will always be your backbone even in the worst of disasters- but since Cas turns away from his family, deliberately isolates them, he remains unstable and deranged.

By the time he takes in the power of the souls and Leviathan in Purgatory, he’s barely holding himself together- his mind is so fragile that the souls of all the monstrous, hideous, voracious creatures in the most shameful pits of the afterlife turn him into a monster as well, and also the perfect doorway for the Leviathan.

So then we flash forward a bit- let’s see, the Winchesters and Bobby are fighting the Leviathan, Sam is continually suffering from his hallucinations and shredded soul, Bobby is shot and becomes a ghost.... and Cas is supposed to be dead.

Cas, the one who betrayed them, manipulated them, worked against them, threatened to kill them, killed hundreds of others, devastated Heaven, let the Leviathans into the world, is supposed to be dead... and Dean isn’t ready to accept that. How do we know this?

Easy: the trenchcoat. When the trenchcoat washes up on the shore of the lake Leviathan!Cas disappeared into, supposedly never seen again, Dean picks it up and takes it with him. And apparently keeps it in the trunk of his car. This might not be a big deal if he hadn’t been switching cars all year to avoid detection- literally a different car every episode- meaning every time he got a new rental, or hotwired a new model, he would open the trunk of the first car, dig the coat out because you know he’d stuff it somewhere where he wouldn’t have to look at it, and carry it to the next car. Every week or so for almost a year. And when he gives it to Cas (who was Emmanuel two minutes ago) we know why he kept the trenchcoat for so long: he was waiting for Cas to come back. Because in his heart he could never accept that Cas was gone, even though their relationship had basically been shredded by the last time they’d seen each other. When Dean returns the trenchcoat, he’s saying: “I forgive you. You were evil and a monster and you lied to me and betrayed me and I hate you but I forgive you because I love you.”

We never really find out what could’ve stemmed from that, though, because their relationship is sort of interrupted with the surfacing of Crazy!Cas.

....

Since this was a crazy long post I’m going to split this into 2, maybe 3 parts. Stay tuned if you’ve managed to read through my entire ramble!

[9r7g5h]

He wasn’t sure how old he was. He had seen the world rise and fall, had seen Queens and Kings come and go, had witnessed countless births and uncountable deaths, and through it all, he had lived.

Doctor wasn’t sure how, but somehow, he had.

For the longest time he had loved it, had loved getting to chronical the world he called his own, even though it saddened him to watch as his friends passed. Watched them grow and fall in love, having children of their own who would follow the same path as their ancestors before, eventually, giving way to the forces of time as well. It was sad, but the cycle of life, one he knew would take him as well. Eventually. One day.

Maybe? Because as the years passed, on and on and on, he wasn’t quite sure. Wasn’t sure if he would ever give in to that eternal sleep, ever close his eyes to never awaken them again, but for the most part it didn’t bother him, that it had taken him thousands of years what it took others a few decades to reach.

Mainly because it allowed him to meet Rose, and finally fall in love.

She was a beautiful wildclaw, had stolen his heart from the moment he laid his eyes upon her, and had decided to dedicate the entire rest of his life to her.

At least, he dedicated the entire rest of her life to her, because eventually, just like everyone else, she passed. After years, decades spent together, happy and in love, she too eventually left him. Just like all the others.

It broke his heart, left him with barely enough strength to carry on, but he did.

Somehow he did, by becoming angry. Angry at the world for taking her, angry at the universe for not taking him, and so he threw himself into the rage and began to train. Trained against other dragons, shredding wings and tearing through scales with his claws and teeth, forcing himself to the top. Trained against monsters, bringing home feathers and hides and legs of meat to care for the clan that had taken him in when he had decided to settle down with Rose. That had mourned her loss almost as much as has had, that had helped keep him alive until he found he could breathe without her, that he had dedicated himself to in the aftermath.

He took others with him, trained them just as well so that, when it was time for them to leave to serve the Arcanist, they would bring that much more power and prestige to the clan. Eventually, that became his role; Queen Tamora gave him rule over all of the extra land within the lair, referred to as the ludus by everyone else, which he could fill with great warriors to be trained as he desired. And for years he took pleasure in this, pleasure in the fighting and the battles, in watching his students become that much stronger before going off to serve the gods.

But even that lost its joy after a while, so he trained one young girl, Angie, to train in his place. And instead, he took over from the Queen the managing of the ludus, of buying the stones needed for the dragons who were to be sold to other clans as warriors, of sorting the Attackers from the Mages, figuring out the odds and ends that had been necessary to make sure it all ran well.

And one day, while gathering the food his warriors would need to keep up their strength while fighting, Shelby approached him with an egg. Found while the gatherers were out, it was clan law that all children be hatched and their worth decided upon, decided upon whether they would be kept or sent off, either to the gods or other clans. And if they were to be kept, adopted into the family that had hatched them.

There had already been an incident, where one of the temporary clan members had found and hatched an egg while out in the field- an oversight never meant to happen, but one that was being dealt with. The girl would be kept and raised and loved, but the Queen was reluctant to let it happen again. So, it had become an royal proclamation that the eggs were brought home, that they were only hatched within the walls of the clan, and to do otherwise was treason. The eggs would be sent to those who could use or desired a child, and the hatching was to be an official event, overseen by one of the council.

Angie was a good trainer, but she was not Doctor’s heir, and to keep the ludus stable, he needed one. So an egg had been assigned to him, and if the child was worth keeping, it would become his own.

Doctor had been hesitant- he didn’t want an heir, didn’t want any child other than the ones he had had with Rose, all that time ago, children who had long since left him alone, but to protest the Queen, while possible, was more trouble than it was worth. So, taking his claw, he had tapped a crack into the shell and watched as the hatchling did the rest.

And the moment his eyes had fallen upon Batiatus, he fell in love all over again, his heart finally settled as he saw his son.

He raised him as his own, trained him in the ways of fighting and the best ways to bring out the best in others, raised him with love and care and all the happiness and joy he could. Doctor wanted nothing more than for his son to be happy, to follow in his footsteps, to take over the ludus and find his way within the clan.

Though, when his son brought home Lucretia, he couldn’t accept her. What was she, to the clan? She had to talents, no training; not her fault, since the dragons that had hatched her had been sold just a few days later, but she was barely better than an outsider. She was smart and clever and might one day make something of herself, but now?

When Batiatus, fool of a son that he was, petitioned Queen Tamora to marry them, he had spoken against it. He wanted better for his son, and how could she be it?

But Tamora married them anyway, and spoke to him on the side- Batiatus was happy, and that should be enough for Doctor. It had been enough for him and Rose, hadn’t it?

And with shame he realized that she was right. He had gotten caught up in his power of position within the clan, with his ruling of the ludus (perhaps, indeed, the third most powerful position to exist, after the royal family and a seat on the council, despite the housing being a bit cramped amongst the warriors they trained), he had lost sight of what was important. And he had been jealous- jealous of his son for finding the love that he himself had lost, and in realizing that, he felt shame.

Rose would have hated him for his protest, and he was shaming her memory by carrying on so.

Determined to make things right between himself and his son and daughter-in-law, Doctor had returned to their rooms within the lair, to ask for their forgiveness and welcome Lucretia into the family like he should have.

Batiatus wasn’t there, his wife the only one home, and so they had talked. Or, at least, began to, for she had, like she always did, offered him a goblet of mulled honeyed wine when he had arrived. And he had quickly drained it, whetting his throat for the conversation that was to come- and was overcome with a wave of exhaustion. Strong enough to make him stumble, her arms around his shoulders the only thing keeping him from falling. Her arms leading him out of their rooms, back to his own, and settling him back into his own bed.

“I will check on you, father,” she had whispered in his ears, “and send servants to tend to you when I cannot. So sleep.”

And sleep he had, glad that such a lovely girl had married his son, unaware that the tang on his tongue, that same tang he tasted in the future whenever he woke up enough to drink from the goblet she always seemed to have waiting, was Emerald Striker venom. The venom drawing him to finally sleep, drawing him to his dreams, slowly, ever so slowly, drawing him to Rose’s side.

[evilelitest2]

Top Nine Reasons why Marxism Failed in Implementation

100 years ago (though not on this day) The Soviet Union overthrew the Tsarist goverment to usher in a new age of Utopian politics..and that didn’t go so well (and now a bunch of tankies are pissed at me). So why is it that Marxism tends to not work out so well in the implementation.  Just forward note, I am mostly talking about the schools of Marxism that are descended from Leninism and actually attempted to control a nation, so when Marxists Orthodoxy folk come in and say “Hey Lenin skipped the Capitalist step” yes I know, I”m talking about the Marxist states that actually exist.  

Number 1: Party Vanguardism 

So while the popular image of Marxist revolutions is a giant crowd of people storming the palaces and killing all the nobles, Marxist organization principle was based around Party Vanguardism, basically a small elite group of ideologically pure Marxists will take over the country in a lightning coup, seize control of the goverment and implement the necessary social reforms for the sake of the people.  The idea is that since the average people are far too ignorant/stupid/religious/superstitious/easily confused what have you appreciate the Marxist Utopian vision, they would basically forcibly implement the system upon them from above.  Party Vanguardism came about in the French Revolution with the Conspiracy of Equals as a response to the sort of self destructive nature of French revolutionary mob politics.  Problem is when you give a small elite total control of the country whose primary qualification is their ideological purity you wind up with a bunch of people living in a total fantasy world and people who aren’t actually qualified are put into positions of power.  Small groups like that are also really suitableness to infiltration by opportunistic egotists (Stalin) but also are prone to corruption and autocracy by those within because those in the vangaurd are like “I seize power” and then they are like “I has power” but they never seem to get to the “giving up power” stage....hmmm

Number 2: No Balance of Power 

So why is it that Marxists regimes always become dictatorships (Stalin, Mao, Pol Pot, Tito, Castro, the Kim Family and much much more) If your nation is led by a single Party who can best implement the great wonderful Utopian vision, then there isn’t really any room for an opposition party.  At first glance this sounds great, no stooges of the capitalist machine trying to gum up reform and plan military coups (that wasn’t sarcastic that happens a lot with right wing opposition parties), but here is the problem.  If you’re regime has no built in mechanism to counter the leadership if they go wrong....then holy shit will they go wrong.  And ambitious morally dubious men will quickly realize “Wait...if I seize control of this goverment, then I will live out the rest of my life as a communist god king cause there isn’t any check on my power”.  And those men will fight to obtain as much power, and once they have it, it is basically too late for the Communist state, because once a dictator seizes power they can ruin the state so thoroughly it is impossible for it to right itself under communist principles, as we have seen in both the Soviet Union and Maoist China.  Because while Marxists never intend to implement a horrible dictatorship, there is not safeguard to stop it, and that is why it always happens.  Absolute power corrupts absolutely.  

Not that I want to defend the US system too much because it is a mess, but Trump obviously wants to make himself into an autocrat...but he can’t, at least not yet.  The system is so decentralized and opposition is so easy that he can’t even get his travel bans implemented.  Power needs safeguards put into place to keep it in check, otherwise autocracy.

Number 3: Militancy 

This isn’t unique to Communism, and it isn’t always the communists fault, but the violent militant methods embraced by the Leninists descended communist (Yes yes i know not all Communists are Leninists many are peaceful I’m talking about the historical states that have existed).   I know that violent revolution gets romanticized but you know why it so many times turns from “overthrow the fate elites” to “Lets murder everybody” is because it starts as it means to go on.  Once violence becomes an acceptable form of political expression, then violence is just going to happen more, and it becomes just easier to murder you’re political opponents than deal with them in other ways. And when you have an external enemy who the state has to be focused on battling on the first thing to go is individual rights, which is why the French Revolution really went to crazy land once they went to war with Austria and we have seen how the American political system deteriorated once we went to a 16 year long war.  Wars make autocracy more likely, and Marxists states often emerge in a state of war.  This is to say nothing of the fact that when you seize power with weapons, the person with the weapons is always going to be thinking to themselves “I can do this again.”

Number 4: Winner Take All Politics

One of the greatest advantage of democracies is that political losers can still exist within society (one of the greatest failings is that there isn’t any room for economic loser).  Because when making an incorrect political move could result in death, people get a lot more scary.  In a democracy, even a horribly mismanaged one, if you lose an election and can go home to move on with your life, the state as a whole is more stable.  If losing a political battle results in death, then people are going to use any means possible to win, and this is why communist auto-cannibalism comes so quickly, because pretty much everybody has their back to then they will gladly destroy the state in order to come out on top or avoid being killed.  Or like what we saw happen with the Great Leap Forward, people knew that if they didn’t meet production quotas they would be shot, so they lied and said they did, which caused those on top to make terrible estimations about how powerful the state actually was and oh shit famine.  

Number 5: Totalitarianism

Totalitarianism basically means that the state has no independent groups, they have a totality of political power.  I have railed long and hard about how states rights are awful and racist and how much I think the states power needs to be curtailed in favor of the federal goverment, but there is a very good reason why I want state governments to exist.  And I”m not talking about balance of power, by having the implementation of policies go to local governments rather than the central goverment, you can adjust policies to address local concerns.  There are a lot of problems with this like Pork Barrel politics, but one thing you avoid is the constant communist problem of “Lets implement a single policy that doesn’t vary across the entire giant country” which worked out so well with the Great Leap Forward....oh wait.  And since there is no recourse...whoops.

Number 6: Religion

I’m am not trying to get into a religion vs. atheism debate here because I find those debates extremely stupid, just from a practical level targeting people’s religion leads to much more violent reprisals because the common people will ignore their own best interest in order to defend their religion.  The French Revolution really lost its international appeal when they targeted the Catholic Church, same with the Russian and Chinese revolutions, just leave the Church alone and your state will just live longer, no matter how corrupt and conservative they tend to be.

Number 7: Poor Incentive Systems 

One of the biggest issues with communist states  is that it kinda wants people to run on ideologies and so either doesn’t design incentive systems to encourage people to do the work they want, or they only rely on “Do the work or I will shoot you” motivation which just causes this mess of ironically enough, labor problems.  it also makes corruption and needlessly complicated bureaucracy inevitable, which compounds with reason 5 and 1

Number 8: Doesn’t play well with others

Again this isn’t entirely their fault, but communist systems don’t really work co-existing with other countries which means that you don’t usually get a good trade relationship going and the benefits of a debt based economy never really come in, which is why they tend to stagnate economically...along with all the other reasons

Number 9: Its Utopian.  

The problem with Utopian political ideology is that it basically makes any middle ground impossible.  After all, if you are going to bring about a glorious Utopia, then pretty much any crime to achieve that end becomes justified. And if the goal is utopia, why bother with the boring regulatory details like a constitution or specific system. While the American constitution is a giant mess of contradictions and bullshit and it desperately needs reform, but one thing I really like about it is that it assumes everybody is a selfish asshole who is trying to take as much power as possible.  So its designed to try to prevent that, and worked well when it was designed...we haven’t updated it for decades but that is a new problem.  You need to design systems to assume the worse, because the consequences of people taking absolute power are disastrous.  And that is always my issue when I talk to Marxists is that they love theory, but kinda lose when you get to details, which is why marxism is always better as a form of critical theory than an actual implemented policy. 

Ironically bemuse this is a long post, the only people who are going to read it...are Marxists.  Evidently I wasn’t having enough fun getting into fights with Neoreactionaries.  

[gamesception]

New Vegas, part 22: Whisky Rose

The last on Bethany’s list of chores from McLafferty was buying out the caravan contract from Rose of Sharon Cassidy, the sad, drunk, hard-edged, and extremely attractive woman Bethany had last seen at the Mojave Outpost.  Considering that her Caravan had already been burned by raiders, and at this point the contract basically only existed to keep her trapped at that outpost, Bethany was pretty sure she could talk Cass into selling pretty easily, but what then?  Without the dead caravan tying her down, she’d be free to travel.  Free to make new friends.  Maybe free to make out with new friends...

Bethany tried not to let her imagination get too carried away as she, Veronica, and EDE made their way back to Mojave Outpost.

Sure enough, Cass was still there at that bar when Bethany arrived, still bitterly nursing her drink and her grudges.  Bethany sat down at the bar - she really wasn’t much for drinking, always a bit of a lightweight, actually, but she wanted to make a good impression, so she ordered a few drinks of her own, along with another for Cass, and started chatting her up for the pitch.  As expected, it wasn’t too hard to convince her to sell.  In the end it cost a large sum of Bethany’s own caps to talk her into it, but when it was done a weight seemed to visibly lift from Cass’s shoulders.

As Cass idly wondered what she was going to do next, Bethany desperately tried to appear cool and casual as she suggested the pretty cowgirl come with her, and Cass seemed on the edge of accepting, when Veronica made some stupid awkward joke, and she changed her mind.  “Three’s a Crowd, isn’t it?”

Well, that was just too damned bad then.  Bethany wasn’t the sort to abandon her friends, not even at the chance of spending time with a really attractive woman who was exactly her type and seemed to be genuinely warming to her and maybe it was just the drink talking but she hasn’t really known Veronica all that long and if she was a real friend she’d be a better wing man or at least would understand right?  Of course she’d understand, and didn’t she have that family to get back to?  Oh, no!  Bethany had been so rude in taking up so much of her time!  Geeze, how could she have been so selfish...

Cass actually looked surprised and did a bit of a double take when Bethany walked back into the bar not half a minute after she left and repeated the invitation to join her, sans Veronica.  Beth almost thought she was going to refuse anyway, but then...

On the way out, though, she mentioned another reason for tagging along...

Of course, Bethany agreed.  If it helped Cass find some closure, get her out of the bottle and back on her feet, of course.  The remains of the Cassidy Caravan were more or less on the way back to the Crimson Caravan head office, where we had to go to drop off the bill of sale anyway, so it wasn’t that far out of the way.  But when they got there, they didn’t find quite what Cass had expected...

As Cass had heard, the Caravan had been burned, but not with fire.  Rather, it had been attacked by someone using high end laser weaponry, reducing guards and goods alike to piles of ash.  This was not the work of common fiends or raiders.  Seeing the damage also reminded Cass of another caravan attack she had heard of...

It seemed something nefarious might be going on, and Cass’s despondency was quickly giving way to an zealous fire.  Maybe it was the booze talking - how many bottles of whisky had they been through since she picked up Cass?  It seemed like she never drank water anymore - but Bethany couldn’t blame her.  She had seen enough killing in the wasteland, how could she blame someone who wanted to fight back?  She had helped Boone with his revenge, after all, if Cassidy wanted revenge too, Bethany would help her get it.  As long as she wasn’t the one pulling the trigger, it was out of her hands, right?

So Bethany agreed to investigate the other caravans, though not before stopping by McLafferty’s office to drop of the bill of sale and get a new assignment - dismantling a bottle cap production machine at the old Sunset Sarsaparilla bottling plant that someone had apparently been using to create counterfeit caps.

The plant was vaguely sorta on the way to the Caravan attack sight Cass had mentioned, so easy enough to take care of it along the way, but thinking back to the piles of ash at the Cassidy Caravan site, Bethany decided they were going to need to gear up before they pursued things any further.  Cass’s shotgun was nice, but wasn’t going to match up against a Brotherhood of Steel splinter group, or whoever else it was staging attacks on caravans with high end laser weapons.

Plus it was super late - the sun was already rising, and Bethany’s day-long buzz was giving way to a super headache, so they decided to to swing by Beth’s room in Novac to get some rest and raid Bethany’s weapons closet.

It was on the road to Novac where it happened - between the giddy-high feeling of hanging out with Cass, the affects of the alcohol, and the sleep deprivation, Bethany just wasn’t as careful as she should have been about raiders on the road.  Some Viper gangers caught sight of the two and started taking some pot shots at them, one ricocheting off EDE’s metal shell.  Bethany started to run, and called out for her friends to follow, but both EDE and Cass had already started firing back.

Bethany didn’t know what to do.  At first it didn’t seem like the Vipers posed much threat.  If Cass and EDE took them out on their own, then it wasn’t really Bethany’s fault, right?  But then there was an explosion, sending dirt and loose pavement flying, tossing Cass on her back and knocking EDE spinning through the air.  One of the Vipers had a grenade launcher!  And he was staring down Cass as he reloaded!  The Viper hadn’t noticed Bethany yet, but he was moments away from killing Cassidy as his friends laughed and cheered him on, and something in Bethany just...

snapped...

Before she or they really even knew what was happening, four men lay dead on the ground, blood, brain, and bits of bone splashed across the road.  Between the hangover and the gunfire, Bethany’s head pounded with agony, and her stomach twisted in knots, though to her credit she didn’t vomit, not yet.

But the sight of the dead men on the ground brought back in sharp detail the scenes of carnage in Primm, all the young men she had killed so gleefully.  The agony in her head, both physical and emotional, was overwhelming.

Cass had picked herself up by this point, and was in the middle of thanking Bethany for saving her bacon when she saw the state she was in and trailed off.  Instead of saying anything more, she helped her the rest of the way to Novac and to her room, where Bethany finally threw up in the toilet.

They talked after that, for how long exactly Bethany didn’t know.  She told Cassidy about Benny, about getting shot and coming back from the dead, about Primm.  Cass, for her part, didn’t really understand why Bethany was so torn up about it.  Hadn’t Bethany saved the people of Primm?  Weren’t the Powder Gangers in the wrong for attacking people and taking the town over in the first place?  Who else was going to do anything about it - the NCR was there and hadn’t done anything.  So what if Bethany had enjoyed it?  What was wrong with feeling good about taking down a bully, about giving a raider gang a taste of their own medicine?

Bethany tried to argue that people shouldn’t just be killing each other, that there should be some sort of authority, some sort of law and order, maybe the NCR...  But Cassidy cut her off there.  What could the NCR do?  Sure, they meant well, but in their greed for ever expanding territory, they had stretched themselves too thin, and now they couldn’t protect their people, couldn’t protect the caravans, couldn’t hold back the Legion, had created entirely new problems with the Powder Gangers...

Not that she thought the Brotherhood or Legion or Followers or Vegas families were better, they were all actively causing harm instead of simply failing to do any good, but at the end of the day, it was up to people to see to themselves, and up to people like Bethany to help those who couldn’t see to themselves.  She was a hero for helping the people of Primm, and if she felt bad about the lives lost, that just proved it all the more.   What she was saying sort of made sense.  Especially after another shot of whisky, just to calm the nerves, but...  

But Cassidy could tell the conversation was getting to Bethany, so instead she started talking about herself.  About caravan life, how she had come to own her caravan, about the sick mother who had held out just long enough for Cass to be able to make it on her own, about the father who had left her nothing but a name before abandoning her and her mother.  Talk of her father led to talk of men, which made Bethany uncomfortable in an entirely different way as Cass started playfully wheedling her about guy trouble, and she was just so pretty, with this forced-but-sincere smile, trying her hardest to cheer Beth up even though it so clearly wasn’t her strong suit, and she was just leaning in and touching Beth’s shoulder and... what was she supposed to say?

So she kind of blurted out that she didn’t really usually have guy trouble, in an awkward way that kind of cut off the conversation.  And she looked up at Cass, with an expression that hoped the other woman would just understand and simultaneously prayed would sail right past her, and she could see the realization click in Cassidy’s eyes.

And then Bethany she saw that small little shift, an involuntary movement as Cassidy pulled back, away from her, and her heart just broke.  Thankfully Cass had cried her tear-ducts dry explaining the whole Primm thing already, but Cass could read the change in her expression, and to her credit was immediately back, a hand on her shoulder, trying to play it off...

...

Cassidy must not have been that drunk, because when Bethany came to in her bed, her headache once again threatening to split her skull clean open, she found Cass snoring on the couch.  As the last night’s conversation came back to her, Bethany was almost surprised that Cassidy was still there.  She rolled over and reached for the glass of water she usually left on the end table and found a mostly-empty bottle of whisky instead, and downed the last of it as she made her way to the restroom, wondering what time it was.  The whisky hardly even burned any more going down, and it did calm her headache somehow.  She splashed some water in her face.

When she came back from the restroom, Cass was awake.  They kinda looked at each other for a moment, before Cassidy broke the silence.  “You wanna take out some aggression on a few no-good caravan raiders?”

Bethany smiled.  “Fuck, yes.”

Cassidy took a plasma rifle Bethany had been holding onto, EDE helping to fix it up with some weapon repair kits.  Bethany, for her part, grabbed a 10mm smg, and took the money she had made doing odd jobs for McLafferty to the dino-gift shop, where she purchased a beauty of a hunting rifle that the owner called ‘La Paciencia’, along with some regular and anti-armor .308 shells.

The awkwardness from last night was mostly gone, and they laughed and chatted and shared a bottle of Cassidy’s own awful-tasting moonshine like old friends as they made their way across the wasteland.  Cass did her best to act natural, and Beth did her best not to notice that Cassidy didn’t brush up against her or touch her shoulder or elbow as much as she had the day before.

Along the way, they stopped by the bottling plant to take care of McLafferty’s job.  There weren’t any counterfeiters there, but there were a couple hostile guard robots that provided ample opportunity for Bethany and Cass to try out their new munitions, Cass congratulating Bethany on her crack shots...

And Bethany’s laughter not-entirely-forced whenever Cassidy would point one of the attacking robots out and say, “hey, Beth, pretend this one’s that Benny Guy!”

It was easy enough to disable the bottlecap press when they found it, and they made their way to the site of the attacked caravan in relatively high spirits.

When they got there, however, Cass sobred up right quick - a trick Bethany was starting to get mighty jealous of as her buzz once again began to give way to a headache - when they found a repeat of the scene at Cassidy Caravans.  Slain caravan, merchandise burned rather than looted, laser scorch marks, piles of ash.  But this time, the attackers had left something behind - 

a map of caravan routes showing where they might strike next!  Cassidy knew the next caravan they were targeting.  If she and Bethany moved quickly, they might still save them!

Unfortunately, as fast as they went, they didn’t reach the caravan in time to save them.  This time, though, the caravan’s mercenaries had been able to take some of the attackers down with them...

Van Graffs, one of the Vegas families, known for dealing in high end energy weapons.  And worse...

Crimson Caravan mercenaries.

To Cassidy, the conclusion was obvious.  McLafferty had teamed up with Gloria Nan Graff’s to help eliminate the competition.  She was furious, and ashamed.  She has sold her business, her name, to the woman who had murdered her employees and her friends.  She wanted revenge.  She wanted to pay back the Van Graffs and the Crimson Caravan for what they had done to her, to wipe them out as they had wiped out Cassidy Caravans and do many others.

Bethany shared some of that anger, especially at how she had been used to get Cass to sell her license, but even so she tried to find some alternative to revenge.  Couldn’t they gather evidence?  Maybe turn them in to the NCR?

Cassidy scoffed at the suggestion.

Hadn’t they just been talking about how useless the NCR was?  About how the people of the wasteland needed to fight for themselves, to claim justice for themselves?  About how sometimes bullies needed to eat their own lead?  The NCR was never going to save the people of Primm, and it was never going to save the smaller caravans from McLafferty and Van Graff, and they were never going to meet out justice for this, and Cassidy knew it, and Bethany knew it, too.

And she did know it.  Cassidy was right.  Cassidy was right about everything.

Bethany was silent for a long minute, as she thought about Benny, about the Powder Gangers, about the people of Primm, about the people she had helped and the people she had put in the ground.  About McLafferty, who had used her, and Cassidy, who had been her friend, helped her deal with her guilt over Primm, who knew how she felt about her, and didn’t freak out or leave.  She thought about how sad and lost Cassidy had been when Bethany first saw her, because of what Gloria Van Graff and Alice McLafferty had done.

Then Bethany she took a long swig of moonshine, and said,

And somewhere deep inside, a part of Bethany that she had locked away, the part that had laughed with glee as she scythed through the Powder Gangers in Primm, woke, and stretched, and greeted the rising sun with a joyous song.

[bi-apps]

Accepted - Alecto Carrow

brookisms

submitted:Alecto Carrow Application

Regular Application

OOC Information:

Name/Age/Timezone- Brooke, 24, MST (GMT-7)

Activity Level- During this time of social distancing? like a 7-8! I work in an essential service so I do work 4-5 days a week but I’ll still be online almost every day.

Ships/Anti-Ships- Alecto/Fenrir Greyback, Alecto/Chaos, Alecto/Unhappiness

Did you read the rules? Yes I have.

IC Information:

Character Name- Alecto (Greek: unceasing anger) Alexandra (Greek: defender of mankind) Carrow

Age/Birthdate- Alecto has just turned twenty-three years old with her brother at a lavish party during the near summer of 1958. They were born at midnight on June 13th 1955, the perfect example of a true gemini, both of them being able to be what the other is not at any given moment. Though Amycus and Alecto get on like a house on fire, their arguments could also be the very thing to set that same house ablaze.

Faceclaim- Florence Pugh, Billie Lourd, Liz Gilles (I don’t have a 1,2, or 3 I’d be equally happy to use any of them! You guys can choose who you think is best for Alecto :))

Occupation- Socialite/Apprentice buyer at Borgin and Burkes: Alecto had not been encouraged to find employment after her graduation like her brother was. It was not important to her family that she made anything of herself like Amycus was destined to. She was expected to be quiet and grateful that she was going to spend the rest of her days tending to the household of a husband whose name she had yet to learn. Like so many defining moments in her life, Alecto had taken the chance to rebel while staying within the confines of what defined a lady in her age. Finding a part time apprenticeship was easy, the Carrow name carried a weight with it, at least at the right sort of places. Borgin and Burkes was an easy fit for the fashionable young lady and an easy sell to her particularly old-fashioned mother. What better way to find a husband than while working with the kind of men that could afford her.

Blood Status- Pure

Traits-

Positive:

Perceptive: Alecto somehow knows what you’re about to say before you say it, knows how each times she backs up somebody is watching her, watching to see if she’s going to descend on them with the full extent of herself. She has spent a long time thinking about why people do the things they do and its lead her to become quite good at reading people which has lead her to become the most powerful version of herself.

Devoted: Alecto has been given everything she could ever dream of wanting, she has had the promise of a charmed life from the moment she took her first breath. Its not that she believes that she owes her family (or anybody for that matter) for raising her to be perfect, in her own mind she was always destined for greatness, but rather that she’s truly thankful. Because of this feeling, Alecto has no problem committing whole heartedly to people and causes who she deems as aspirational within her world. It’s truly a devotion to an aspirational version of herself, whether she’s willing to admit it or not.  

Efficacious: She has the beauty, she has the status, and she has the brain to back it all up. Whether its in her own mind or not, what Alecto Carrow does works. She’s whatever she needs to be in any given moment; she can be menacing, pragmatic, or seductive at the turn of a dime. Being a perceptive person is a strength that Alecto doesn’t recognize in herself, she’s too busy worrying about being the perfect version of herself to realize she already is for who she wants to be.

Negative:

Co-Dependant: Having Amycus meant always having a partner. He is more than just a brother to her, he’s half of her whole. Her mother was another demanding influence on her life, the standards Alecto was expected to live up to weighed heavy atop her poised shoulders. At the same time that her mother was the one ladening her with the expectations of high society she was also very much the person who taught her how to carry the load. Alecto has always had people who have helped her along her way to personal greatness. If it wasn’t her family it was one of the many men she would wrap around her fingers, her confidants have become her safe place and she simply cannot imagine a world where she is without them and god forbid one where she is entirely alone.

Sadistic: Alecto is a Death Eater because she will do whatever it takes to preserve her own way of life. Whether or not she actually believes in blood supremacy is not entirely formed thought inside of her still young mind, however she believes that the introduction of impure blood into wizard society is a threat to the way her family has existed for centuries. If they’re allowed into the schools and the ministry, what’s to stop them from dismantling the businesses and institutions that she holds os dear. Change is an evil word and she will not stand for it. Alecto’s temper is famous and its something she’s come to be infamously proud of, turning to fits of black out rage and destroying everything in her wake. She gets a sick joy from it, as though the screams her victims emit validate the inflated sense of sense. She loves hearing the sound of her own name begged, a small whimper from the back of one’s throat will send a chill up her spine to spread wide across her face into some catlike grin. She’s not ashamed of this part of herself and wears it as a sort of badge of honour.

Immature: Alecto lives within a state of arrested development, she’s not a girl and not yet a woman- perpetually teetering on the edge of behaving like either. She’s haughty and emotional, never one to think twice before making a decision. This might make her insufferable to those who are not enough of her own kind to see the deeper layers of herself, but its also a very good way of protecting that inner child.

Patronus- Alecto is unable to produce a patronus.

Boggart- Alecto’s boggart is the sound of her brother’s cry coupled with the rush of a bird moving past her. The wind that is created from the hawk like creature’s wings has such a gusto that it whips past Alecto knocking over her most prized photo. The glass in the ornate frame is smashed and each the shards cracking over her family member’s faces. They’re unrecognizable and the break is irreparable.  

Key Points-

In the Carrow household, children are seldom seen and never heard. They are nothing more than heirs and accessories at society events. Her mother and father had not been expecting twins to be delivered on that cold December evening, so when the midwife told Irina and Aleksander that there was another baby to come after the birth of Amycus they were shellshocked. The little baby girl was born forty minutes later, she came into the world without a scream. Her parents were not worried that their newborn wasn’t crying, they already had what they needed before she had taken her first breath .

Upon her birth everything was nearly entirely arranged, there were to be lessons, then cotillions, marriage and then babies. Alecto was always taught she was the best and that she deserved the best, she was taught that while she was entitled to the very best things that life had to offer there would always be people who would try and stand in the way of that and it was her duty to ensure that that would never happen.Alecto Carrow was raised to be a perfect little girl, she wasn’t to question anything, but told simply to out her head down and do as she was told. If she was a good girl, things would work out for her, if she wasn’t- then it would be all her own fault. While Amycus was showered with praise and gifts, Alecto’s accomplishments were largely ignored. It didn’t matter what she did, her mother would tell her, her last name wouldn’t stick and whomever she married would get to boast her accomplishments as his. The Carrow daughter grew withdrawn at home, feeling as though nothing she could do would make a difference. The only person to ever make her feel like she was worth something was her twin brother, he told her that she was special, that she was a part of him and that if he was being praised she was too. He taught her to stand up for herself, to be fearless in the face of adversaries. He made her realize what being a Carrow meant. It no longer meant hiding and waiting, it meant getting the praise she deserved and taking it if it wasn’t given to her.

During her school years, Alecto thrived. Her marks were exemplary and she finally found a crowd of people she fit in with. Perhaps choosing to hang around the bullies of the school was an extension of her toughening up, but Alecto hardly ever minded. She found those who chose kindness to be weak, they were not the kind of witches and wizards she could see fighting for what was right- let alone fighting at all. It was a natural step for her to begin a walk on the wild side, she could often be found smoking on school grounds or planning ill-mannered quidditch parties. Though if one was ever to confront her about anything, she would simply bat her eyelashes and ask them if they were really sure. She knew people knew of her temper, she made sure rumours flew through Rita Skeeter. She didn’t manage to get too involved within the daily dramatics, no matter how much she loved to indulge in the day’s gossip. The young witch knew it was worthwhile to know the goings on of those around her, how trivial it may seem to outsiders. If you know somebody’s next move it’s much easier to get ahead of them. Alecto Carrow wanted to be feared, that was the only way she ever saw herself being respected.

Upon graduating from Hogwarts Alecto travelled the world with her brother, making sure to meet up with whomever the Dark Lord wanted along the way. It was Amycus that introduced Alecto to the death eaters, Amycus that sparked the fire in her that burned brighter than any other. Alecto Carrow was made to be a death eater, the girl who would terrorize house elves until they gave her what she wanted and tricked professors into letting her never turn in assignments had finally found something she was a perfect fit for. Her wild temper and self serving nature led her to personalize her attacks on her victims, making them especially brutal. It was like when Da Vinci first picked up his paintbrush- Alecto Carrow was born to kill. Murder for hire however was not exactly the way a young woman who was from the upper echelons of society was to make her living. Alecto found something she loved almost as much as hearing her victims squeeze her name out of their strangled throats- fine antiques or rather selling them to noble and meaningful families. The Carrow girl got right to work at Borgin & Burkes, her family name helping her get her foot into the door, but it was her eye kept her there. Never before had they seen a buyer who was so able to get families to part with their treasures and heirlooms for such fragmented prices. Was it truly her eye, or rather the silver tongue that darted from between her lips like the moniker of her former house.

With her professional life thriving, there was only a matter of time until she heard the talk of engagement muttered beneath the breath of her family members. Her mother was itching to rid herself of Alecto, there was no doubt there. But the choice they were teasing her with was hardly somebody she would have opted for. With growing resentment towards those in charge of her future Alecto looked within herself, wondering what if she could figure it out on her own just as she had with nearly everything else.

Changes/Extra Info- http://brookisms.tumblr.com/tagged/character:-alecto-carrow/

Para Sample-

The mark didn’t hurt like Amycus said it would. The smell of searing flesh still lingered fresh in her slitlike nostrils and warmth emanated from beneath the sleeve of her white silk blouse. Work that day seemed futile and though she chattered on about ornate lamps sourced from Romanian castles, her mind was clearly elsewhere. Indeed it was, Alecto Carrow’s mind floated above the storefront of Borgin & Burkes off to truly anywhere else. In her mind that day she was wielding a whip, cracking it down onto the backs of anybody who doubted the possibility of power she yearned for. She felt complete in a way, more satisfied than any exam score earned, or scream squeaked out of the impure, or even kiss stolen from her many suitors could have ever made her feel. To be a marked woman was not only a significant feat, it was a badge of honour. She above most of the other women who roamed the earth around her, had pledged her life to serve the cause of the worthy.

Alecto’s hair pooled around her shoulders in curled tendrils, it was perfectly quaffed and hardly maintained by her own doing. The porcelain of her skin offset in a stark contrast by her dark features, as did her outer delicate beauty and the rogue devil that lurked beneath the surface. She felt lucky to have her job she truly did, to have gotten out of her family home for longer than a lunch or a party, though selling antiquities was hardly her passion so to speak. Her calling was the same as the mark newly etched deeply into the innards of her right forearm. It crossed over her when she held her hand to her heart, tucking her in safely with the promise of a brother and sisterhood filled with only the purest and most loyal of souls. She truly meant it when she killed for him, promising to lay her own life and prosperity on the line for the benefit of the greater good. Too long had filthy mudbloods and half breeds walked the streets alongside her and finally she had some true power above them, or at least she felt entitled to it.

The bell above the door jingled its cursed song and Alecto managed to put her customer service smile on. Her once pursed smirked turned on itself upwards into a catlike grin as she eyed up her opponent, or rather client. The hooded guest in the shop was not somebody she immediate recognized and the hair on the back of her slender neck stood up as she anticipated a challenge. She knew that it was;t likely to be somebody with whom she’d have to be combative, Alecto would still play the part of the English rose in this case, but beyond that the man remained a mystery. She didn’t much care for that, Alecto dealt in absolutes, like she was absolutely going to scream if he did not remove the blasted hood from around his face. “Hello sir,” she purred artificially, her heart seizing as his face was revealed before her voice dropped into itself, dripping with poison. “And to what do I owe the pleasure?“

[mystical-flute]

Come Sail Away Ch. 13

Also on Ao3 || Buy me a Ko-fi?

"… Oh shit," she said quietly as she shoved herself up and out of Yugi's arms, hunching over in pain and looking in horror at his friends as they hovered nearby. "Oh no, no, no…"

"Reika, what was that? Where were we? Why do you have a wig?"

The wig, which had slipped from her grasp at on onset of pain from Crocodile's attack, was snatched back into her hands. Her carefully constructed world was falling apart and her mind was racing trying to think of a reasonable answer. "I – I… Yugi it's…"

But there was nothing she could say that would convince him otherwise. She knew it.

So, she sighed, running a hand along the wig's dark brown strands. "You saw the truth, Yugi. The truth of where I've been for the past year."

Yugi stared at her, dumbfounded. "What are you talking about? What sort of school did you go to?!"

"I didn't go to school, Yugi," she admitted, stumbling in pain again as she tried to walk to a nearby truck. It would be faster to get to Kaiba Manor in a truck than walking. "I was working instead."

"Working? What the hell were you working on?"

She whirled around to face Yugi, her cloak fluttering behind her. "Finding my parents, okay?" she snapped, Yugi's eyes growing wide. " I got an opportunity when I was sixteen to try to find my parents and I took it, and it is very complicated so if you want to find out more I suggest you get in this truck and I'll tell you about it before it's too late to save my boyfriend from certain death!"

Yugi seemed a little stunned, but everyone ended up in the truck, with Reika speeding out of downtown Domino and into the neighborhoods beyond.

"Reika, what is going on? How are you even here?" Yugi asked after a moment of silence.

She sighed. "I got here thanks to a friend of mine. Have you guys heard the theory of the multiverse?"

Serenity raised her hand, looking up. "I do. It's the theory that there are multiple universes much like our own, right?"

"Yes. And it's true."

"So that place – with the guy with the hook for a hand – "

Reika gripped the steering wheel. "Is part of another world, yeah.  It's a world with pirates and fruit that can transform your entire being. There's a man made out of sand, of smoke, of rubber. We're still investigating why exactly the worlds are connected, but…" she shrugged a little. "The organization I work for is researching the connections between our worlds. I'm a field agent. I was undercover there for the last year."

"You realize how insane this sounds, right?" Joey asked from the back seat.

"You're free to not believe me if you want, but it's up to you to figure out a plausible reason why I was wearing a wig with a bow in my hand and a quiver of arrows on my back, and why I have that same wig right now while I'm wearing a dark blue cloak that can conceal all of my features," she replied, staring at him through the mirror. "Oh, and why a man made out of sand exists."

The blonde went quiet, and Yugi spoke up again.

"Reika, you're searching for your parents? But I thought – "

She laughed bitterly. "They lied. They lied to us, Yugi. My parents are spies too. They work for the same organization I do now. They were never going to bring us Mickey Mouse ears from Disney. The worst part is… Kaiba Corporation had been selling weapons to the tyrannical government in the other world before Seto took it over and turned it into a gaming company."

"Does Kaiba know?"

She shook her head. "I don't think so. He never mentioned anything before…"

"Could he be lying?"

"I… don't know. I'm not sure about anything anymore Yugi," she said with a sigh, before frowning. They should have seen the turn to the manor's drive by now. "Something's wrong."

"You're right. I think we passed that tree three times now," Mai said.

"Dammit! They're onto me," she hissed, bringing the truck to a halt and jumping out. "Leichter! Show your face you coward!"

"No need to shout, Miss Reika. I'm right here," came the drawl and sound of expensive shoes against the pavement.

Turning around, her boots ground against the pavement, facing the man who, at one point, had been like a father to her.

"Let me see Noah."

He smirked at her, the face a unrecognizable from her childhood. "I already told you, you can't. He's busy working on something else and you can see him when that is over with. It isn't my fault your cousin and his friends broke you out of your memories before it was time."

She felt sick at the thought of this being totally planned out. "So that's why you kept us in a loop on the road then. What do you want, Leichter?"

"A duel, between you and I. And your dear cousin can't help you. It wouldn't be fair, after all since he's the reigning King of Games."

Her eyebrow quirked. "A duel. That's it?"

"A friendly duel between two people who have been through so much together. What do you say, Miss Reika?"

She exhaled sharply through her nose. "Fine."

"Good. But as I said…" Leichter's hand waved, a small dome appearing over the two of them and blocking Yugi and the others from getting closer, "your cousin will not be helping you with this."

Reika locked eyes with Yugi, somewhat surprised to see the terror on his face given how angry he'd been at her, but she masked her surprise with a confident smile and a thumbs up to him to tell him she'd be okay as a duel disk appeared on her arm, and as she turned back around, cards appeared before her, scrolling in front of her face, and she chose her deck from home.

She stood across from him, turning on the duel disk and smirking.

"Let's duel."

From the start, it was obvious she hadn't dueled in a while, and Leichter got a few easy hits off on her, taking her life points down to 3250 in only a couple of turns, and she found herself flat on her back at the impact of the attack.

"What's the matter, Reika? Have you been gone from your home for so long that you've forgotten how to duel?" Leichter taunted with a smirk. "Oh, I forgot, dueling was more your cousin's thing, wasn't it?"

Reika's eyes narrowed as she pushed herself to her feet, but didn't dignify him with a response. She needed to focus. What was it that Grandpa and Yugi always told her about when it came to dueling? Concentrate. Focus. Monsters, Traps. Magic.

"It isn't about winning or losing, Reika. Not necessarily. But if you have something to fight for, you must never forget about it. Concentration is the most important thing in a duel. Concentrate… and believe in your cards and your heart."

"I'm not done, Leichter. Everyone has a shaky first few steps," she said with a glare as she drew a card and smiled. Her favorite card. She couldn't use it yet but… yes! She glanced at the other cards in her hand, and then at the cards she already had on the field, and smiled.

It was hard, but little by little Reika found herself wearing Leichter's life points down, and the smirk on his face dropped into horror, then anger.

"You can't beat me! You're not a duelist!"

"Neither are you," she said, before looking up at the dragons floating at her side. "Now, Tyrant Dragon, attack Leichter directly and take the rest of his life points!"

One tyrant being defeated by another. It seemed almost poetic.

"You're right, Leichter. I'm not a duelist," she said as the dust settled and the holograms disappeared. "Yugi is the King of Games, and deservedly so. He could probably kick my ass in a duel. But you forgot one important thing. When he was learning how duel… I was learning right alongside him."

Leichter glared up at her, his brow glistening with sweat. "It's too late Miss Reika. You aren't going to find Seto Kaiba alive. Master Noah's already put his plan into motion."

"You lied to me about Noah being dead. Why the hell should I believe you now? Now let. Us. Pass."

He glared, snapping his fingers, and the road fell away, leaving Kaiba Manor in front of them. "I'd wish you luck, Miss Reika, but as you refuse to accept, it's too late." And with that, Leichter disappeared.

"Reika, that was awesome! You're a natural at dueling just like Yugi!" Joey said as the group rushed to her side. "But, uh – that seemed sorta personal."

She frowned, looking at him. "You didn't hear any of that?"

"No, you were in some sort of bubble, or something," Yugi explained with a small frown. "We couldn't hear a thing. You were totally alone."

She began walking toward the manor, hearing the others follow. "It didn't feel that way. It was like… I could feel you cheering me on. I understand why you find dueling so exciting, Yugi. I just wish it didn't have to be so life-and-death with us. But Joey… as you were saying, you're right. That duel was personal. Very personal. Leichter was my mother's boss at Kaiba Corp, and he lied to me about something very important."

"What was that?"

She took a deep breath, approaching the large staircase to the front door. "He lied to me about my best friend being dead. He is in fact, not dead, and wound up apparently losing his mind and kidnapping a bunch of people I care about. And worse, wants to kill my boyfriend."

"Noah? Noah is your best friend?!"

"He was until Gozaburo told me he was dead and I believed it for six years of my life," she said. "And Leichter told me I was too late to save Seto. That Noah had already… I need to stop him."

"We will," Yugi suddenly said. "You shouldn't have to do this alone."

Reika's breath hitched. "Yugi… thank you. If we're too late… Noah will take Seto's body."

"What the hell?! That's messed up!"

She pushed the door open,  and shivered at the emptiness inside. Cobwebs and dust coated the walls and furniture in the room.

And then, music began playing. A sad piano and violin duet, and the notes had her skin crawling.

"This is so creepy…" Téa whispered as they walked through the house, the music growing louder as they approached the music room, a ghostly voice joining in with the music.

"Dancing bears, painted wings…"

"Hey, I know this song! It's from Anastasia!" Serenity said with wide eyes.

"It was our favorite. Noah and I used to play it all the time when we had lessons…" Reika replied, rubbing at her arm nervously.  Her fingers flexed, muscle memory gliding over invisible keys before she pulled the door to the room open.

"Lessons?"

"He was violin, I was piano," she replied, forcing herself not to think about the ghostly music filling her head as she opened the door and looked around. The room, unlike the rest of the house, was immaculate, left as if it had only been yesterday since the last time she'd been in here. "Nothing. We should check – "

"Oh Reika, you've gotten so much better at the piano! You and Noah were just wonderful!" Miaka's vice suddenly rang out.

Reika's hands shook as her parents materialized in the room, hovering near the piano as they looked at a younger version of herself, pride on their faces as younger Reika continued to play.

Yugi's breath seemed to hitch. "Uncle Genji… Aunt Miaka…"

She grabbed the door, slamming it closed with a heavy breath as tears stung her eyes.

"Reika – "

She didn't look at him, instead making her way to the grand staircase. "I don't have time for Leichter's mind games right now. Noah's not here. Let's check upstairs."

The others followed, unusually quiet.

"SETO!" Mokuba's voice suddenly cried into the silence.

THUD!

Sprinting up the rest of the stairs, she rushed in the direction of the cry, her hand brushing against the gun on her side and pushing the door open.

Seto and Noah stood, staring each other down as what must have been one of Noah's memories played in the background. It was clear there had been a duel going on, both covered in grime and streaked with sweat.

An imagine of Gozaburo stood with high-ranking Marine Admirals, doing a weapons demonstration.  Reika felt her stomach lurch at the scene, and she slowly stepped forward.

"What sort of trick is this?" Seto snarled, pulling Mokuba tighter against his side, blue eyes narrowed in disbelief.

"It's no trick, Seto. These images are very real. And now… I'm going to show you just what this world can really do!"

Noah's hand suddenly lit up in flames, and Reika's eyes widened before she rushed into the fray, grabbing Seto and Mokuba out of the way as the fire licked at the back of her cloak, making her wince in surprise.

Seto's eyes were wide in surprise. "Reika – but how? How did you get here?"

"I'm sorry…" she whispered. "I'm so, so sorry. He's the one I told you about. The one from my nightmare. There's so much I've been hiding from you."

"HEY! Who are you and how dare you interrupt me?!"

Reika pulled away from Seto and Mokuba, slowly turning to face Noah, slowly drawing her weapon, though not raising it.

"T.A.I.D.R. Don't move, Noah."

The rage on Noah's face was replaced with shock as he took in her form, slow realization forming. "Wh… what? You can't be…"

"I am. It's me, Noah. It's Reika."

"Reika…" his voice turned childish again, and in his eyes she saw the young boy she'd once been best friends with. "Y-you… you grew up…"

She nodded, her gaze sad as she slowly put her weapon away, her hand still raised in a protective stance. "I did… and you – you're here. You're alive…"

He frowned. "Alive? No, I'm not alive… that's why I need another body! So I can go back to the real world and claim what is mine!"

"He lied to you, Noah. He lied to me too. He told me you died in that accident. You don't have to claim anyone's body. You can go back to being you, and we can go back to Domino and figure all of this out."

Noah didn't seem fully convinced, continuing to look at her with a skeptical gaze. "You said T.A.I.D.R. Why do you know what that is?"

"Because I'm an agent. I've been there. I've fought the Marines. Fought against your father's weapons. Course, I didn't know it was your father's weapons until today when Leichter let it slip."

"Leichter? Weapons?" Seto suddenly asked. "You can't possibly mean – "

Noah smirked, the look making Reika's blood run cold. "That's right, Seto. I am the one true heir to Kaiba Corp because I am Gozaburo's biological son! And since you apparently know Reika… I also had her first!"

Reika's jaw tightened as she turned to look back at Seto, who was staring back at her in shock and betrayal.

"You never told me about him," Seto hissed dangerously.

"If I had, I never would have been able to meet you. Gozaburo threatened to cut me off from Kaiba Corp and the people that I knew. I was twelve and had only just been told my best friend was dead. How could I turn down the opportunity to have new friends?" she replied.

Noah's gaze hardened. "So they replaced me."

"It wasn't my choice, but I don't regret it. But we can fix that, Noah. You can come back with us and we can be friends again. It just isn't the same without my duet partner. What do you say?" she said gently, with a genuine smile on her face, holding her hand out encouragingly. "I promise, I'll help you."

"Why should I trust you?"

"If you couldn't trust me, I never would have told you that I'm a T.A.I.D.R. agent. I have been honest about everything I've kept secret for the last six years."

Mokuba suddenly stepped forward. "You must be scared. I understand. I was scared too, when Seto and I got adopted by Gozaburo. He was mean, he was horrible to Seto. But we have a chance to be brothers, without him. What do you say? Brothers?"

There was conflict on Noah's face, the boy looking between she and Mokuba.

"You don't have to be alone anymore Noah. We can all get out of here together," Mokuba said.

Another agonizing pause, but Noah relented, taking her hand and sinking into her embrace as Mokuba went back to Seto's side.

"I've got you Noah… I've got you…" she whispered, looking at Yugi as he and the others made their way over to her.

"So… can you get us out of here, Noah?" Serenity asked quietly.

Noah pulled away from Reika's embrace and looked at Serenity, opening his mouth to speak before a rumble startled the group.

The sky suddenly darkened, a menacing purple haze covering the bright blue, and Gozaburo Kaiba's laughter began to fill the air, before his face appeared from the clouds, a hologram staring at them with an evil smirk on his face.

Reika reacted immediately, drawing her gun and aiming it directly at the sky.

"Do you really think that can hurt me, little girl?" Gozaburo sneered, unfazed as he turned to Noah. "And you! You've failed me, yet again Noah. I'm taking over now."

Noah flinched. "But father - !"

"You always were a slacker. A spoiled slacker, Noah! I knew I couldn't count on you to take over Kaiba Corp after your accident. Especially dealing with the Marines."

"Gozaburo! How the hell did you survive?!"

Gozaburo's eyes turned to Seto, another smirk crossing his features. "I thought you knew better than by now, Seto. I'm always one step ahead of the competition… and you and I have some unfinished business. I will digitize the entire world, and then I shall be the one to rule! And you, boy, will be nothing more than a servant."

"Never. Whatever you plan, I am going to win, and we're going to get out of this godforsaken virtual world!"

Gozaburo laughed, slowly disappearing from view. "You say this as if you have a choice, Seto! You are never getting out of here, I'll make damn sure of that!"

And with that, Gozaburo was gone… but so was Seto.