#*over for me
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Once I write my knight wizard it's o v e r for yall
#;ooc#ooc#*over for me#IMAGINE FOR A SEC-!!!! the most honorable genuine chivalrous easy going sweet knight u could ever meet#if ghibli hugs could be manifested a person; he would be that#a knight in shining armor like the ones in fairytales#THE HERO ARCHETYPE! its always the knightly ones im#he is like if sunflowers were a guy;; very wanwan (dog) coded but also very firm about his beliefs#he's that one gym bro that tells u good job after u do ur reps and gets excited about ur progress#im writing him just so i can yell into the void about him in my blog truly#i dont know how to explain how tender shaped he is im just -WAVES HANDS-#also an indifferent chef that is around 600+ years old that is surprisingly very kind#and a wizard that if i could describe in a word it would be ' intoxicating '#i hold them in my arms#i will perish on this hill (wizard bf hill)#im out rn but;; IT WILL HAPPEN EVENTUALLY!
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WHEN ON PERIOD:
do not crash out
your feelings are NOT valid
do not send that text
don't kill yourself. lock in
do not act on negative emotions until at least 2 days have elapsed
#losing my mind over my bf not missing me and then i remembered im on period#girl you have 15k words to write. god
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phenomenom thats been bothering me that i could only express via an mspaint reverse boomer comic
#this doesnt look anything like my mom but thats probably for the best#but seriously she'll invite me over and then spend the entire time staring at facebook. girl what the hell
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was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.
#just#this happened once before when i was speaking to someone who clearly knew me but i didn't know them#and they were OBVIOUSLY an important person of some sort and I couldn't ask#so i pretended to hear something and looked over and they looked over too to see what i was looking at#and while they were distracted i snuck a peek at their id badge. this worked#rookposting#everyone has done some variation of this before.#im only self conscious because of all the kinassigning.
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Bewitched
#They've taken over my brain this is serious#They'll kiss in pt 2 trust me#Delusional#gelphie#wicked#my art
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i love you vaccines i love you research i love you reading the book instead of having chatgpt summarize it i love you critically thinking rather than reacting to a headline i love you investigating the source material i love you science i love you math even though you are personally my enemy (math/yn slowburn) i love you writing even though you try to stab me a lot i love you Experts in Your Field i love you Using The Brain
#i don't read fanfic so idk what my math x op ship name should be#.... i love u math.... despite our differences.... :/ u work i guess#not like for ME. never for ME. but like for other people you seem pretty reliable.#... SOMEONE (me) has a LEARNING DISABILITY#edit: thank u to the anon who suggested i refer to math as my rival. u are so right.... not enemies... no...#*locks hands with math* bonded........ 2gether.... 2 sides of da coin... both under threat of AI... i luv u math#(<- still clearly never understands whenever math speaks bc literally what is going on over there. the fuck is a polynomial)
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the honda odyssey, huh?
#poolverine has taken over my every waking thought#they're the defintion of matching each others freak#you can tell my brainrot is bad by the fact that I willing drew a car#and don't get me started on this pose it took me ages to figure out#anything for peak old men yaoi#hope you enjoy the freaky little details I added in here#poolverine#deadclaw#poolverine fanart#deadpool#deadpool fanart#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#fanart#my art#digital art
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A conversation at the DMV.
#my art#digital art#comics#sketchbook#he also told me about a really nice out-of-the-way beach in the next state over that i ought to visit
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Dumb thing that would not leave my brain
#jayvik#arcane#viktor#jayce talis#suggestive#bluesky enjoyed this one way more than i thought so i figured id toss it here too#ive gotten such sweet nice comments on my last triptych drawings#fellow jayviks you are so niceys#stop enabling me!!!! ill want to draw more!!!!#i STILL cant get jayce's face right. i feel like flynn rider#i hate hate hate drawing anything inorganic especially in perspective#if i have to draw a straight line or an ellipse its game over#so it truly speaks to my love for The Character that ive willingly drawn viktor's brace several times lol#mocha art#my art
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someone on twitter said Imagine what s2 jayce would give to talk to s1 viktor just one more time. and someone had a time travel alternate dimension fic ready to go. and i read it. and now my face is being eaten by 3750 feral dogs i think
#thisss wass going to be just one little sketch lord help me#the guys you put on this earth to finish their psych degrees are drawing pathetic men again#jayvik#arcane#viktor arcane#jayce talis#my art#fanart#i have uni and work and also therapy to do but i got sick this week so i think i read like. over 30 fics yesterday like i was struck#by some affliction legitimately#please talk with me about them. this is a cry for help#i drew all these while listening to circa survive on repeat do you understand what that does to a man
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glorious evolution
#arcane#jayvik#arcane s2#jayce talis#viktor arcane#fanart#based on the vitruvian man#shout out to my friend for encouraging me to post this#you know who you are. love you#my favorite part in arcane was when viktor said its evolution time and then evolved all over the place#jayce fuck your hammer#not literally#unless#still dont know how to tag properly#hell yeah
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I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.
Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.
He was really nice.
Yeah.
It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?
You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."
You didn't, loves, you didn't.
We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.
I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.
Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.
When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"
No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.
Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?
Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.
That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.
I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.
A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.
I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.
So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!
Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.
You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.
I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.
I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.
It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.
Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.
#listen to old auntie Shades#serious#fuck I don't know how to tag this#I should probably read-more this but I'm not sure where#and now I need to go take a walk for my stupid mental health#you never stop processing#you do it over and over and over and over#and hope it gets a bit easier each time#Someone might get upset by using prey#but 'preferred prey' is an important concept from the predator's view#it doesn't mean the people are inherently prey#you feel me?#it's the best word I can find for the concept#neil gaiman#adjacent
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My apologies, Lady Normal. But where does you Eunuch come from?

#then when they opened the cage-thing so we could actually meet and tucker bodyslammed me to say hi LOL#and my mum had to pick him off me bc he was too big for 10yo me and i was gonna fall over#i dont think i could actually pick him up til i was like 11 maybe older loll#lady normalgirl and her eunuch#my doods#thanks for the ask!#askbox closed#he was so friendly in the adoption centre n surprisingly nice when he came home despite being stalked by a 10yo from 5am til 9pm every day#fealty/love at first sight LOL#10k
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I'm just-
we classified the colossal squid in 1925, put together from pieces found in sperm whale stomachs.
we've found them dead or dying or in distress, floating on the surface or entangled by trawlers.
but now
in 2025
100 years later
we finally find one alive and thriving in the deep Antarctic sea
and it's a baby.
#colossal squid#marine biology#yes I'm getting emotional over a squid ;w;#the wonders of the natural world really get to me ok
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horror movie enjoyers will be having a terrible day and be like fuuuuuck i need to unwind….maybe nows the time to finally check out shit piss deathfest 2 . For a bit of lighthearted entertainment
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