#...........I DON'T FEEL WELLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[shineemoon]

250507 ONEW CONCERT [ONEW THE LIVE : CONNECTION] in SAN FRANCISCO

[reddiesparklypinkgelpen]

I'm rereading The darkest minds for like the 50th time, and I love skipping to the end :') (I'm a masochist)

[blade-that-was-broken]

@endlesspaint

[antisocialxconstruct]

I've been thinking a lot about art and why it doesn't feel good anymore, and a lot of what I keep coming back to is a) simply not being happy with my style, but b) not feeling comfortable experimenting because I feel like I need things to be """post worthy""" 🙄 so like... it's kind of a vicious cycle lmao so I'm heeding the advice I used to give people trying to overcome perfectionism which was "don't worry about making things that are 'good enough' to post and just post everything."

So... some vague style experimenting 🤷‍♂️ and also a sketch of Ilya from forever ago that I really liked but kept thinking I would come back and do more with.

[vulpixelates]

you know. i never thought i would miss my family at all but after the fourth christmas without seeing them bc of covid, i weirdly do today 😔

[jadastarkey]

Nice!

taylor swift x fem!eras dancer!reader

warnings: none? lil smooch?

genre: fluff

sypnosis: dancer!reader and taylor are secretly dating but before the show, you agreed that you'd surprise her to make it public.

~°•☆•°~

the whole show was filled with tension between you and Taylor. she was so on edge because of the promise. the promise that you'd make it public. the promise you'd both be out.

she was messing up when you got close. lyrics were getting mumbled, and she'd zone out, lost in your face, or sing the wrong part.

the whole time you were internally laughing your ass off, seeing her so spaced from the thought of you.

it was in the midnights era when it finally happened. during bejeweled, you asked kam if you could do his little dance solo, and being the absolute g he is, he obviously said yes and agreed to keep it a secret from taylor.

"I polish up real, I polish up real nice!" taylor sung, looking at kam so he could step forward. the shock on her face when you stepped forward was humorous.

you took her micless hand and twirled her around before bringing her into your body and holding one of her legs up. she let out a squeak of surprise before you brought your lips down to hers and caught her in a kiss.

she smiled into it, and her cue to sing again passed by many beats before you disconnected, smiling at each other.

it felt like it was just the two of you, in your own euphoric world of bliss.

you let go of her and continued to dance. your eyes didn't leave her, but neither did hers, so it was fine.

the audience went absolutely crazy. they thought she was with travis? they thought she was straight? no. she was with you. she was in a pr relationship with travis to be with you and it was clear the contract was over now.

the song choice was quite ironic too.

~°•☆•°~

After the show had finished, you knocked on the door of her dressing room "tay?" you called out, beginning to knock again but the second your hand was even close to the door she opened it, making you step back, almost hitting her

"come in" she smiled, grabbing your hand and pulling you in

you closed the door behind you and sat on the couch, gently yanking her down to sit with you "surprised?"

"yeah I was actually. but I was expecting it because it took you so long to do it" she said while you rolled your eyes

"welllllll I know you were still surprised. you should've seen your face"

"I'm sure I will tomorrow" she said more seriously. she knew coming out would come with backlash. she had to keep karlie a secret too.

you could feel the regret seeping out of her. you cupped her face and pulled hit closer "taylor, look at me" you said softly

she bit her gums and looked into your eyes.

"dont overthink. there's nothing we can do about hate because, shit I know you hate me quoting you but the haters are gonna hate. you can't stop them.. its just what they do. you'd get backlash for breathing the wrong way so don't stress it. you've advocated for gay rights and pride multiple times before. if that wasn't hint enough I think this is. I know I'm not big like travis but I can still protect you like he does." as you spoke, she let out the smallest of smiles but it was clear as day to you "I love you, and no jealous troll will ever make me think any differently. you're mine, forever And always"

"I love you too" she whispered and sunk into the quiet "but please stop quoting me. I swear it's my 13th reason why"

"isn't 13 your lucky number though?" you smirked as she hit your arm

"shut up, you actual moron"

soon, the room was filled with laughter and any regret or guilt had diminished. it was just what you did.

~°•☆•°~

a/n: first little les thing on here how we feeling, guys?

two posts in one day, you're being spoiled

uhhh not proofread

[lixiesstorys]

Acrophobia... (Sickfic)

Trigger warnings: emeto, acrophobia, swearing

Sickie: Minho

Caretaker/Comforter: Changbin, Hyunjin, Chan

This will be really, really short again, but I hope you'll like it XD

Minho hates being far away from the ground. He is literally scared of it. Well too dumb that he is stubborn too...

.........................................................☀.................................................................

Dumb. That was how Lee Know felt. Absolutly dumb. Why did he volunteer for this damn shit? Every member said that they could do it. Like really everyone. But no, Minho had the idea to take the part in the song, that was played at a fucking 10 meter house!

Minho groaned and went out of his bed. His watch said 5:10am. There was a 100% chance he would see his only hyung downstairs, a 50% chance that he just came from the studios and a 50% chance that he was up already. With that he brought his mind in a different direction of thinking: being worried about Chan's sleep wasn't the best thought of distraction, but way better than thinking about dancing and singing on a 10 meter building. Only by thinking about that fact, he felt nauseous.

When he wallked downstairs, he already heard someone, who was clearly cleaning the kitchen. So he would have to talk with Chan. Great. Of course he loved their leader with his whole heart, but in the morning (and especially that early) the eldest was a bit much for someone who preffered sleeping over early mornings.

As expected, Chan was in the kitchen. He seemed to sort the cutlery? Minho didn't question that behavior and went straight to the coffee machine. "Oi, Minho, why are you awake already? The shootng for the music video starts at 2pm!" "My question would be: are you already awake or still awake and if that is the case: when do you mind going to sleep?" the dancer contered and started to make his coffee. "Welllllll, let's say I didn't plan to sleep...?" his hyung answered asked and earned a Minho-glare with eye rolling.

Both of them set down on the kitchen table. "Minho? Are you really fine with dancing on that building? You can still say that I shall do the part, I know the lyrics and dance moves, Changbin and Hyunjin too" "No, I'm fine. I won't fight my fear with running away from it" it sounded more like an attack he realized, so he added "I just don't want to run away from it anymore. You all always face your fears and I really have to learn that" his hyung didn't look convinced but smiled warmly at him. "Okay, just say if it gets too much" with that he stood up and went upstairs.

Lee Know sat at the table for a while until he decided he would make himself a little breakfast. He knew that he could get nauseous or even sick at the building, but it didn't hurt that much when there wasn't only bile and stomach acid to throw up.

This thoughts should have turned his alarm on. And they did. But he ignored it. And oh, that wasn't a good decision.

(A little break, I feel like the world is ending in Germany right now, it's raining like wtf it sounds like, I don't know how to describe it, but yk what I mean?!?)

Around 10am the whole Stray Kids gang was at the shooting point. They were way too early, but so they had time to look around at the set, to practice and to get ready. Only the look at the building he had to stand on made Minho's stomach churn. He felt his breakfast moving around and felt like he was going to vomit.

But he just ignored it. Pushing things away alway helped. Except with his members. And fear. But those things were different. No matter how annoying Han was, how angry Changbin or how clingy Chan-hyung was: he loved all of them unconditionally. But fear? He really wanted that feeling to go away. There was nothing to be afraid of!

"Hey Lee Know, are you okay?" Changbin just appeared in front of him, what made him jump a bit. "Oh my gosh, Changbin! You don't have to give me a heart-attack!" "Sorry, you just look so pale. If you're not feeling well, we can make the video at a different day. I can ask Chan to-" "No, it's fine, I'm good" Minho didn't mean to snap on the younger member. He really didn't mean to sound rude but he couldn't help it. The tension in his body went into his voice and he couldn't control it. Changbin looked a bit stunned at Minho then just shrugged and walked away.

The dancer massaged his temples as Chan called the members together for the last final 'talk-round' how they called it. "Okay, we'll start with the group parts first and then we'll just see who wants to do next, just like always, okay?" the others nodded. "Everyone knows what he has to do and where?" nodding again. "Okay. Remember it's okay to make mistakes and that we have time. Don't stress yourself" "Says the right person, Channie-hyung" said Felix who earned laughter from everyone except Minho and Chan. Chan just rolled his eyes on the younger Aussie, but Minho was too focused on not being sick.

The first parts went very well, they only had to film one track twice, because Seungmin accidentally danced the wrong, but that was the only thing that happened.

After they finished recording the parts in which more than one person was seen, they decided who would be the next. the list looked like this in the end: first was Seungmin, followed by Hyunjin, Felix, I.N, Han, Changbin, Minho and as always on the end Chan.

Minho was kinda glad that Chan was at the end. Chan's part wasn't the easiest in general but if you knew how the moves were, it was easy to dance them, so if he had to change the parts, h could just take over Chan's part. But that won't happen! he said to himself, while watching the others dance.

Chan must have seen that Minho looked pale, so he said that the others were allowed to go. Everyone blinked confused but accepted that untypical decision. Soon only Changbin (who refused to go back to the dorm), Chan and Minho were left. "Lee Know, you ready? Or shall we swap parts?" "No, I'm fine" And with that Minho walked towards the building.

His knees wobbeled, when he started walking up the stairs. As soon as he was standing on the flat roof, he tried his hardest to not look down.

Lee Know swallowed. He felt like his throat tightened. Breathe, just breathe Minho "Aaand action!" and Minho jumped in action. But not in the action the camera men wanted him.

As soon as Minho walked closer to the end of the roof, his stomach flipped. He couldn't do this. He just couldn't! His stomach flipped again and he felt something coming up his throat.

The dancer turned on his heel and ran as fast as he could, back to the door he just came from. He heard how the door slammed behind him and that the door downstairs was opened. But he didn't have time to think about who opened the door in front of him, he just needed to come to the restroom as fast as possible. While Lee Know ran to the spot where the restrooms where, he pressed his hands in front of his mouth.

As soon as he reached the restroom, he kneeled down in front of one of the toilets. Before he could even catch his breath, a gag brought up the bit of breakfast he had eaten. That happened at the same time he tried to take a deep breathe, what sent him coughing over the toilet.

While he still gagged a hand started to rub slow circels on his back. When another way of vomit made it's way up his throat he felt how frustrated tears started to fall from his cheeks into the toilet, where they mixed up with bile and stomach acid.

After a while Lee Know only brought bile up and at some point only dry gagging. "Sshhh Minho-ah, there is nothing left in you. Try to take deep breaths and relax a bit. I know it's hard, but you can do it, I know that." his leader comforted him until he leaned back.

But as soon as Chan had calmed Minho down, the dancer started to sob violantely into his hyung's shoulder. "I-I'm so so SO sorry hyung! I schould've... should've known I couldn't do this! That I'm too-too weak for it!" Chan, who was completly stunned by Minho's sudden outburst, just hugged the younger tight. "Hey, hey Minho-ah, look at me. You aren't weak, okay? You are one of the strongest persons I know! You tried, that is all that matters. We will just swap our parts and then you'll dance mine, is that fine?" Minho nodded, his head still burried in Chan's shoulder.

A few minutes later, the bathroom door opened again and Hyunjin came in. "Can I help with something? Binnie wanted to go to bring you some water." "Maybe you could stay with Lee Know, while I talk to the manager?" "Sure no problem"

After Chan got replaced by Hyunjin, he walked to their manager. Hyunjin started to play with Minho's damp hair. "You better?" he asked and Lee Know nodded. "Thanks for staying here. I feel better now, we can go back" "Are you sure?" another voice asked. Changbin kneeled down next to thee dancers and gave the older one a bottle of water. Minho accepted it graduatly. "Yeah, it was just part of a panic attack"

With the support of Hyunjin and Changbin he walked back to the managers. They watched Chan doing his part and after that Minho felt good enough to perform the part Chan did in original. But it was okay like that and he definitely learned his lesson to listen to his body.

END

That's it! After writing nearly everything, my computer deleted chrome and I had to start again, I was nearly ready with the new one, only to find this one in some file burried between too many pictures, but I got the old one back :DDD. This one isn't that short and new ideas are welcome <3

And thanks @eternal-stay for the picture-help XD

[kiefbowl]

there's this woman who I knew in hs and we've been fb friends since then, and I'm not really friends friends with her. like I haven't had a real conversation with her since hs and we were never close, you know? okay, so she was married to this loser for a long time, and I know he was a loser bc they had a daughter and every once in awhile she would post a frustration. and I would be in the comments like "I think that was disrespectful of him" or "I think you have a right to be frustrated" yadda yadda you know peacefully being like "dump him" lol. welllllll recently in the past few months she has been clearly dating someone else, and they look happy. and I know they're dating because she low key announced it after just posting pictures of him every once in awhile. she doesn't post often. and she never "announced" a split with her hubby. and I'm just dyyying to know the story. the facts. the deets. the tea. what have you. but I don't feel like we have a good enough relationship for me to slide into her dms and be like "yo, sis, tell me how you dumped your dumpy husband. I am so gleeful about it."

[wewringmagicfromtheordinary]

Was thinking about something last night that reallllllyyyyy pissed me off:

We know more about Alexander Pierce’s family from one movie than we do Steve and Bucky. And Steve was in 7 movies, Bucky has a whole show, and has been in 6 movies 😑

Like with Steve, he mentions his mother twice (nurse in TB ward, “got hit, couldnt shake it”, “it was okay, she’s next to dad”) and theyre both like a 2 second mention that they dont make any kind of big deal about (in his own fuckin movies as welllllll 😭), he mentions his dad twice (gas chamber thing, and then”she’s next to dad”). We dont even know if the thing about his dad is true (i love the theory i saw on a post that he was lying about his dad being in the 107th so he could get in with bucky) and all we know about his mam is that she was a nurse and died when he was 19

And then with bucky, all we get is him saying he had a sister, the wall in the Smithsonian that says he has three sisters, and that his parents are dead, and also that his family had a car. (“My folks wanted to give you a ride to the cemetery”)

AND THEN WITH PIERCEEE, we find out he has a daughter who was saved in Bogota or something because of Fury, and that she was/is an officer in shield (im pretty sure), obviously has/had a wife, he has a niece, which means either he has a sibling or his wife has one, and we also see his house. ALL IN ONE MOVIE AS WELL 😭😭 THE MOVIE HE ISNT EVEN A MAIN CHARACTER IN

And dont even get me started on every other marvel character (*cough* tony who has a whole ass memory shown of his parents in Steves own fuckin movie and who has three other movies centred around him *cough*)

Like they couldntve even shown a photo of Steve’s parents, or Bucky’s sister or parents, and in the comics, Sarah is very important to steve and is the reason he never gives up, like certainly that has to be an important thing to mention???

I need a smoke 😞

Oh man, I feel this rant in my soul.

I watched the first two Thor movies a little while ago and I remember comparing it to the Cap trilogy. Cause in Thor's movies we learn what his relationship is to his father and brother (to a lesser extent his mother but we still see them interact and get a sense of what their relationship is) along with his relationship with Jane, Darcy, Selvig, Heimdall and the Warriors Three. We also get Loki's relationship with his brother and parents, because even though Loki is not the main character, these are still relationships we need to know about.

And then, as you mention, catfa does not show us Steve or Bucky's relationship with their families. Cause why would we need to flesh out these characters in their solo movies? We get passing remarks about their family members, but never see them. Imagine how weak Thor's movies would be if we never actually saw the brothers interact with their father, they just mentioned it.

I also love that theory about Steve lying about his dad, but it would be nice if this was true in the movies, cause that would tell us more about Steve's relationship with both men.

Something I also hate, which you didn't mention, is that we don't learn Steve's mothers name until his third movie, and then Bucky is the one who tells us - 'Your Mum's name was Sarah'. Now, I love the idea of Bucky and Sarah being close, it makes sense and is adorable. But we shouldn't learn this from him. It would perhaps work if Steve and his mother weren't close, but Sarah is supposed to be one of the most important people in Steve's life, the one who inspires him to get up over and over again.

Instead the movies try to tell us that the most important relationship Steve has, is Peggy. This post tells us that the Russos believe that Peggy is the reason Steve is who is he is, that he got all of his best qualities from her, which a) makes no sense, they knew each other for a week before he got the serum and Steve says they didn't talk before that, not to mention the serum wouldn't work on him if this was the case and b) ignores both Sarah and Bucky. So basically Sarah and Bucky were sidelined for comphet.

Speaking of, after reading some posts and your fic about this (which I love), I was thinking about the double date Steve and Bucky went on at the start of catfa. Cause I find it funny that at this point Bucky still has a family, parents and at least one sister, but he chooses to spend his last night before going off to war with two unnamed strangers. Wouldn't it make more sense for him to want to spend the night with his family before he has to say goodbye? I get that they wanted to set up Steve meeting Erskine, but you could've easily had Steve and Bucky hanging out with Bucky's family, then Steve sneaks off to try and enlist, Bucky goes after him, they fight, Erskine overhears, etc. But since it's two unimportant woman it just feels like another reminder that Steve and Bucky aren't gay.

You make a really good point about Pierce (@amarriageoftrueminds has a great theory about Pierce and the Carters being related which you should check out if you haven't). Thinking about it, there's other character we learn about in Steve's movies like that. In catfa we learn a bit about Erskines life before the movie. In catws we learn about Nick Fury's grandfather. It's fine getting to know this characters, but when we don't get this for the main characters, it's just weird, isn't it.

And yeah, we have to mention Cap 3. I have so many issues with that movie, including the fact that it doesn't feel like Steve's movie. It's part Avengers, part Iron Man. I remember seeing a quote from one of the Russos talking about exploring Steve and Bucky's relationship, when in reality Tony's relationship with his dead parents was explored more. T'challas relationship with his father was explored more. And at this point we still don't know the name of Steve's father. Absolutely insane. This post sums this up nicely. (T'challa also has the most coherent character arc in cacw. Which on the surface is fine, there's nothing wrong with side characters having full arcs, it's just that Steve has already been majorly sidelined in his own movie. At least when Natasha had her arc in catws it still felt like Steve's movie).

I think this is a result of a few different things: marvel doesn't really care about either Steve or Bucky. Steve is a boring rule follower who only cares about getting the girl while Bucky is a villain who needs to constantly work to pay for things that weren't his fault while he puts up with people treating him like shit. Who cares about Steve's childhood or parents? The only important thing is how much he loves Peggy. Why explore Steve or the relationship with any of his family when we can be reminded of Tony's daddy issues once again?

I need a smoke as well, mind if I join you?

[mattsfrenchtoast]

ESCAPISM - a Matt Sturniolo fic.

warnings: mentions of drinking

'lipstick smudged like modern art'

I was drunk, not black out drunk, more like the tipsy where everything's blurry. my lipstick was in fact smudged, the bartender had told me. i had no idea where the triplets had gone but I knew they were my drive home, at least one of them was. Matt hopefully.

we'd been hanging out more recently as well we just had. this party had sprung up suddenly, Nick suggesting we went, so Matt and Chris came to. the drinks had already got to both Chris so Nick had decided to get an Uber home, leaving me alone with Matt.

I stumbled over to the boy who had been eyeing me up and for some reason I recognised, whose face lit up upon seeing me. he gripped my waist as I stroked his face. 'you're pretty' I slurred, not recognising who it was. he smiled manoeuvring me outside towards his car. 'eager?' I joked smirking at my funny joke. he then gently placed me into the passenger seat of his car.

'don't know where the fuck I am or who's driving the fucking car.'

I yawned snuggling back into the seat. 'what's your name? you look like a boy I know, he's called Matt, he's really pretty! he doesn't know I like him though.' I ramble on to the person driving next to me. the boy just nods, slightly smiling. 'you know him too?' I question, just to get 'very well' as an answer. 'don't tell him!' I exclaim hurriedly. which once again received a nod.

'speeding down the highway, sippin', mixin' pills with the liquor 'cah fuck these feelings,'

we overtook most of the cars on the highway in silence, what could you really say to a stranger? I felt myself get tired, dizzy even and sunk back against the seats. I must have blacked out, barely remembering anything else from the night.

I left everyone I love on read, spilling secrets to the stranger in bed'

we must have got back relatively quickly after that as we soon were at his house, and I was laying down on some sheets, basically telling the brown haired boy all about my life, while staring into his big, blue eyes. 'and I just really like him but I don't think he likes me and I don't want to ruin anything between us. I must have a thing for brunettes with blue eyes,' I say, 'you look kind of like Matt yourself,' i continue. 'i do?' he asks as I nod in response.

'I remember nothing, so there's nothing to regret,'

I woke up the next morning having little to no recollection of the night before, except that I was in Matt's bed but he wasn't here. he must've taken me to his house after the party then I assumed. I rolled over to check my phone,and realised I left Nick, Chris and some of my other friends on read. I replied to them to say that I got home safely and where I was.

'other than this 4-4 kick drum poundin' in my head.'

I groaned and sat up, then walked out of Matt's bedroom to go and find him. he was in the kitchen and was toasting his bread. I smiled at him and he grinned back, and said, 'you don't remember anything from last night do you?' I shook my head to which he replied with another small smile.

eleanor's notes: welllllll that was a weird one and a cliff hanger because what was I to say? I thought if this in class... thank you for all the support and like @emeraldsturns I think I will be doing more song fics so!! thank you to @bernardsbendystraws for the dividers!!

taglist: @sturniolo04 @starrii-sturns @tezzzzzzzz @sturniolofruitloop

other people I'm tagging: @bluestriips @lifecansmd @natesfavoritehoe @grace-sturnz @backwardshatnick @chrepsi @emeraldsturns

[rubbership]

so i was able to fully put my thoughts down yesterday on why i don't exactly gel with deltarune and spamton specifically and I wanted to share it here too even if i feel like some of my friends wont agree or won't super love what i have to say, but i think theres something important here we should be looking at.

the way people speak about spamton scare the fuck out of me because it feels exactly like how people talk ahout doc scratch yet somehow LESS self aware. the themes of the game are specifically what children do to cope with trauma and the consequences that come with it, Kris is shown to be a young transgender teenager with no autonomy of their body that uses the internet to escape from their unhappy situation in a vulnerable way. This is then paired with Spamton, an older man who is the embodiment of pop up adds who repeatedly sexualizes Kris and their friends, before pulling Kris aside privately to give a shpiel about how Kris will never relate to anybody but him and how they share the same darkness and trauma and are both puppeteered by higher forces that leaves Kris perminantly changed. This is a character who speaks about penis enlargment pills, and calls Noelle Kris' "sidechick" and "hoochie mama." The Darkners have been essentially all but outwardly confirmed to be based off of experienced and types of people Kris had known in their real life, and Spamton would be no different. This paired with the fact that Spamton is meant to be a heavy allegory to internet pop up adds and the hypersexuality of the web, and that Deltarune is actively envoking imagery and themes of child abuse and repression, the implications feel obvious to me. While I don't think Spamton HIMSELF is a groomer or evil or Kris' abuser, i do think hes meant to be analogus to Kris' internal feelings about lack of autonomy especially bodily autonomy. I actually hope deltarune doesn't go in this direction or confirm it, I feel like the way its being handled right now feels tactless and strange.

This is made even worse by the utter obsession and fascination the fandom has on Spamton, the way people interpreted Spamton calling Noelle "hochi mama" as him calling her his Literal Mother speaks to a form of media literacy i find genuinely fucking repulsive. Do you see the parallels i can make between the way Spamton is talked about between how Doc Scratch is talked about, with people seeing him as a "father figure" to Rose and ignoring the fact that his hypersexual language is meant to thematically code him as a child groomer. I bring up so many homestuck parallels when I talk about Deltarune but you have to understand that Toby Fox and Hussie are literally creating art from the same or similar internet space they grew up on, about the same types of people and the same types of experiences most millenials/older gen z experienced. this is why Deltarune shares so many narrative beats and thematic similarities to homestuck. They're both stories about being transgender youth raised on the internet due to your poor circumstances.

And the refusal to ever ever ever engage with these themes is exactly the same thing the homestuck fandom did, its exactly why people didn't realize things like Bro sexually abusing Dave because they liked to read the shit about Bro having cameras in the bathroom as comedic and unserious rather than important to the themes or character development of the Striders. I see Deltarune makes the same mistake as homestuck where Toby Fox has developed an attitude of welllllll~ i wont say it outloud explicitely the viewer should interpret it however they want~ but i'll nod to it~ i'll even imply it heavily~ but i'll never say it outloud, for it would break the metaphor! this was a problem with undertale too, but the difference is undertale was an extremely small and empty game. Undertale essentially functions as a darkride game, youre on a set of tracks and you watch the choices that happen due to those tracks. Sans severely underdeveloped character doesn't matter because in the nature of undertale you arent supposed to see that. Only catch glimpses of what Frisk is seeing. but that doesn't change the fact that Sans is, overall, a poorly written character. this is applicable to most of Toby Foxs characters, but Sans is the most obvious example in my mind. Toby Foxs work tends to scream BABYS FIRST GRIMDARK to me, but unlike with homestuck, instead of driving head first into qanon psychobabble edgelord shit, it just lightly teases ideas before running away like a giddy child.

MAYBE chara tried to kill themself! maybe. MAYBE kris is nonbinary! maybe. MAYBE susie is homeless or an orphan!!! maybe!!!!! MAYBE chara was from an abusive home maybe frisk tried to kill themself maybe asgore is eviler than we thought maybe toriels an alcoholic maybe papyrus is flirting with a child maybe mettaton is an evil capitalist maybe chara is evil maybe spamtons a predator maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe. and again, this worked in undertale! frisk was a young child and we only got to see through their eyes with the context they were given. but Kris isn't like that, Deltarunes story doesn't function like that, and thats the problem.

I dont think Toby Fox is bad or evil for any of this, but i do think its bad writing when you have all these deals with nintendo and have sweatshops making plushies of spamton that people are buying for their young children. and I think we never actually NEEDED an ambiguously nonbinary character, like. We didn't fucking need that with the original undertale! You know he could've just come out and said it right? that they use they/them pronouns? He can STILL do that. Right now. He can still say "hey Kris is nonbinary" on twitter. But he doesn't. Despite being one of the most popular games right now and literally having contracts with nintendo. And now the most popular character in the game is a character who interacts sexually with the teenage main characters and represents using capital to attempt to buy themselves out of their trauma great. Good! Im sure this means great things to come!!!

I just think maybe we should actually try to engage with whats being put infront of us maybe? Maybe? i feel like its the fucking homestuck incest shit like ohhh well maybe if we don't look at it itll go away and its like idfk how to tell you that this is what the stories literally about.

[askaspaceboy-official]

You should tell me everything you want about Sally face lowkey

WELLLLLLL, travis is the BEST character, but,

The game starts off on a hospital, and then you walk around, and there's an EVIL dog, and then you get to the apartment, and meet your best friend larry (gay metal head) and you steal a pony, and a guy named Charlie goes to jail,

ANYWAYS FAST FOWARD TO TRAVIS

He looks at sal (lovingly I SWEAR) after sal makes a joke about his father, and travis punches him. (Ow) and calls him and Larry flamers, later sal finds him crying in a bathroom stall, along with a note that says

"I know we don't really know each other and you probably have your opinions of me. I thought maybe if I told you how I feel, things could be different. The truth is, I can't stop thinking about you. I'm crazy about you. I think you're amazing! But I know these feelings are wrong. It's not the way a boy should feel. Shame swallows me whole. My father would kill me but I can't live in his shadow forever I just..."

I definitely think Travis became good friends (Maybe even boyfriend's)

with Sal, he was at Sally's trial even tho he didn't lose any loved ones in the Mass Murder at addison Apartments. He was there when Sal was sentenced to death

In the time that followed Sally's execution, Travis acted as an inside dude for Ash and Neil from within the Devourers of God, (D.O.G) giving them SUPER important info bout their activities and inner workings, details necessary to destroy the Phelps Ministry and the temple below.

Travis tried to make Ash to leave the church when Neil and Maple were captured but had to drag Ash to leave regardless if she had the will to destroy the temple or not. They fell out of contact, but Travis's chance to redeem himself came as the final stages of the cult's plan came into play.

Travis stabbed his infected father in the stomach, driving a green blade into his fathers stomach and killing him, his father was admonished travis for his betrayal but was met with resentment. In the end, Travis gave his life so the Void could be closed and played a key role in the fall of the Dark.

MY POOR BABY

I LOVED WRITING THIS THANKS FOR THE ASKKKK

[anonmousegosqueak]

@sirbonesly @kiokijin I guess we can talk about my dystopian stuff just like this, it's not like I feel bad if people take inspiration after all:)So. What is the worst written thing about USUALLY in dystopian books? Ex. (mainy those I've read and was disappointed by, exept hunger games) Dyvergent, Insurgent (it was a PAIN to read) Allegiant (only watched a few video essays because the second book drained me for how boring and generally unintresting and full of tropes it was...) The shatter me series (I unfortunetly read it all expecting it to become suddenly good, never became and just wasted a lot of time on cheesy romance and other stuff despite having an actual good promise) the hunger games series (that I loved, but I also knew the revolution wasnt all that realistic and even though the romace part is minimal I still had a bit of a "welllllll... The rest is exeptional, I can exuse a half baked romance") I tried reding A Winter's Promise saga (that despite not being dystopic still had a fucked up society in each book) and some more general stuff, I want to read the maze runner, Legend and other stuff right after I finish my ao3 TBR (Which automatically means roughly 300 fanfictions, which translates to roughly 2 years if I were to keep this obsession indeterminitely LOL) [Ignore this part] (pleeeease mom let me read 1984 and fahrenhewt 451, there are people my age reading them, you are just the one that gets easily impressed, I easly read smut of two really aggressive gays being freaky while being covered in the blood of one of their victims...)

What do these things actually ave in common (exept hunger games, which I will not continue to address in this kind of questions)?"Bad government™" "Strong female protagonist™" and "unnecessary love traingle". Which doesn't mean I'll avoid every implication of these three, just that I want to improve the parts that can be improved and completly erase the bad stuff (or at least let it be bearable like the hunger games).

So, after a long ass introduction let's get to the actual government. I'd like to think that in the early middle 21th century a nuclear war erupted that killed a good cunk of the human population, it evolved into WWIII and now there are something like 120 countries, the nuclear explosions+studies on the human body during the war+other smaller things brought to the mutation of some genes in a good cucnk of the population on different levels, where some mutation made you more prone to cancer, others let you live longer and other are literally blacked out from all the records:)

Skip to a century and a half later where we are in China (because I'm TIRED of only seing the USA in dystopian settings, this can become so much better if you move it from one country to the other) where the government has a massive but transparent control on the population. The working class is kept entertained in a way to keep them under their control through controlled media (basically if they want they could do a tiktok ban situation, then unban it and be praised as saviours or shit like that), the poor are kept under control with violence (and I'd also like you to search for five seconds "koloon walled city" to get an idea of what THEIR landscape is like since the working class has assigned homes where the prices are regulated to inflation) and the new government has a bunch of ways to prevent that the population develops again the blacked out type of mutation. Every kid that is born in a hospital is wrapped at birth in a cloth, right? What if scientists created special kinds of clothing that "poison" your cells and don't let them either inherit or develop said mutation? See it as a "trying to be good skin cancer"...

So basically there is ALSO a substance (I have no idea how to translate that without making ME seem like a crazy scientist, but take it with a grain of salt because I suck at understanding how the government works:) that wakens this mutation again or (since nowadays it's already dormient without the need for "trying to be good skin cancer") in general.

Biggest plot twist? The mother of tje protagonist is the one that started the rebellion movement:)

☝️☝️☝️

Baller.

[whollyfree]

Do I Wanna Know?

Summary – You and Jake are friends with benefits. But surfacing feelings causes you to wonder if it could ever be more.

Pairings – Jake Kiszka x f!reader

Word Count – 2.5k

Warnings – SMUT I have this in my bio but 18+ MINORS DNI !!!!! unprotected sex, dirty talk, mentions of oral (f!receiving)

A/N: WELLLLLLL it's been a while hasn't it? This is based on a request I got a while back that’s kinda loosely based on “Do I Wanna Know” by Arctic Monkeys. Hope y'all enjoy :)

You didn't know when the feeling began; the feeling of impending doom you felt whenever Jake waltzed into your apartment, using his spare key you so generously offered him for times like this. For times of need, when you felt yourself in longing for any kind of touch to ease the ache of loneliness.

But it was never meant to go this far.

You never meant to have butterflies in your stomach whenever you heard the noise of a key on the other side of the door. You never meant to look forward to taking in his soft, brown eyes that stared up into yours so delicately as his head buried itself between your thighs, his velvet tongue licking at you mercilessly as you gripped the roots of his chestnut hair for dear life.

How pathetic it was that the man only responsible for slipping his cock into you whenever either of you felt lonely became responsible for the constant jitters and the melting of your heart; for the yearning feeling that took hold of you by your throat whenever he strode out of your front door shortly after you both came. You wanted him to stay.

That's why his words struck you so as he hovered above you, fucking into you as he securely gripped each of your hips with his hands.

"I bet you think about me all the time, don't you?"

You were thankful for your furious blush that rose on your cheeks long before he was inside of you. If it hadn't been there, you were sure your face would pale and drained of all color before his very eyes; all of your secrets revealed from the lack of red in your cheeks and the panic in your eyes.

"What?" He doesn't stop moving even as the puzzled response leaves your lips. He wasn't even looking at you, staring down at the place where your bodies connected. You knew he liked to watch it, and on occasion, he asked you to watch it too.

"You heard me," he mutters, his breath catching as you subconsciously squeeze around him. He looks at you now. “I know you think about me fucking this pretty pussy all the time, don't you?"

And you did. More than he would ever realize.

You were relieved now. Relieved that you played stupid (mostly because you were) and for the fact that it was just dirty talk to push you over the edge. He was close and you could tell, but there was never a time where he would allow himself to finish before you did. He'd hold it for as long as he had to until you were crying out his name, your cunt strangling his length as he’s buried inside of you. You weren't used to it with past lovers and assumed he would be the same, but he wasn't. And maybe that was partly the reason why you felt as you did.

He cared about your pleasure too, maybe even more so than you did. You didn't even care if you finished; just wanting to feel the warmth of his presence, the touch of his callous fingers, and the teakwood scent of his that encased you whenever he hovered over you like this. But he cared, and oh how he cared.

"You think it's pretty?" You were befuddled, his every word cast straight into your heart with an arrow and pierced it. It hurt so good.

Jake scoffs as he pushes in a bit harder this time, making your eyes roll back. "Of course it's fucking pretty. Goddamn gorgeous, just like the rest of you."

He really shouldn't have said that for the sake of your internal delusion of actually having him fully. But much to his satisfaction, those words sent you into the very bliss and euphoria of your own orgasm. It had crept on you, dragging you down into its depths before you even had time to recognize what was happening. You claw at his back, pulling him closer as your nails dig into his skin.

He comes seconds after. He can't help himself; the feeling of you squeezing him so tight and making those sounds just for him is enough to grip your hips tighter. He shudders, a loud moan of your name falling from his plush lips as his hips falter. Pressing into you one last time, he spills inside of you, arms shaking slightly as he tries to regain his composure.

The sight of him above you, his swollen lips and rosy cheeks, his forehead wettled with sweat as his hair sticks to the damp spot, his eyes half-lidded and oh so fucked out makes your heart melt and your cunt flutter again. He hisses when he feels it and you can't help but smile.

"Something funny?" Jake asks you, and by the lazy smile on his face as he pulls out of you, you can tell he's not mad at your amusement.

You keep smiling. "No. Nothing at all."

The fact that he then got up to grab a warm washcloth to clean you up did little to stop the pull on your heartstrings. He was always so caring, so gentle.

When he feels satisfied that his work is done, he takes a moment, his back to you now as he sits on the edge of your bed. He looks almost as if he's contemplating something. You wait for him to speak and you really think he might as he turns around to look at you for a moment, but he doesn't. He turns back around and locates his clothes before slipping his boxers and linen pants through his legs.

You hate how beautiful he looks in that moment; it's unfair. He isn't playing fair as he stands there so gloriously, his tanned chest catching glimpses of sunlight as the sun shines through your blinds. He's simply buttoning the final two buttons of damned his shirt as your heart thrums in your chest at the growing feelings you have for him, and he isn't playing fair.

Just as Jake slips his boots on and goes to walk out of your bedroom door as he always does, you sit up.

"Jake," you blurt before your brain has time to catch up with itself. He turns around quickly, quicker than you had expected him to.

"Yes?"

And in that moment, you realize he's expecting an answer from you. You don't have one. Well, you do, but it's long and extensive and tied in a messy bow to the confines of your heart where you intend on keeping it safe...so you choose to forgo your gut feeling to be honest.

"Nothing. It's- never mind." You look away, almost ashamed that you can't even form the words.

Jake looks as if he's going to say something, his lips parting slightly and you swear you see his body lean in the direction of your bed where you're still bare and tangled under your own sheets. But he doesn't say anything to prompt you to say what you really want to.

"Ok," he nods. "Til next time?" He almost looks hopeful, a small raise of his eyebrow as he looks at you expectantly.

"Yeah," you give your best soft smile as you nod. He nods again before leaving your apartment, where the quiet and loneliness envelops you once more.

Why can't you bring yourself to say it?

-

It was a few days after this when you saw him again. Jake had invited you, his brothers and Danny, of course, as well as a few of his other friends to his new place for dinner as somewhat of a housewarming party.

It wasn't abnormal; the two of you were friends after all. You obliged his request, politely bringing a bottle of his favorite wine as a gift to christen his new place. However, Jake would be lying if he said he didn't have other ideas on how to christen his new home, all of which involved you. But you didn't know that. Not yet, anyway.

So there you sat at the table next to Danny, politely engaging in small talk with some of Jake's friends that you'd never met. Jake sat to the left of you, leaning back in his rightful throne at the head of his large new dining room table. He was the host, after all.

Dinner had been...odd. For you, at least. Josh, as always, was having a grand ole time, entertaining his twin's guests with a "can you fucking believe this" sort of story over and over. Jake was used to this and he truly didn't mind, even if it was his house and his party. He enjoyed when Josh stole the show, becoming a bit unnerved if too many eyes were on him at one time.

And in the excited spirit, Danny leans over to you, whispering. "Twenty bucks says Josh won't let Jake have another word in the whole night."

You smirk. "I say fifty."

You giggle and Danny moves away, feeling rather proud of his joke and grinning at your banter with him. You sip on your glass of wine, the wine you gifted Jake, placed to the top left corner of your plate when you feel his eyes on you. You glance at him as you raise the glass to your lips. He looks almost calm, but his clenched jaw gives him away.

He mimics you, almost mockingly so, as he brings his own glass to his lips. He takes a sip before turning his attention back to Josh and his extravagant story, jaw still clenched.

Once dinner ends, you offer to take the plates from everyone at the table. Jake fights you on it, of course, going on about how you're a guest in his home. Gathering the finished plates weren't your responsibility.

"Well, I'll help you, then," He relents and you take a moment before you nod in agreeance, even if he wasn't asking.

In the kitchen, you rinse plates while Jake takes them from you to put them in the dishwasher. It's quiet for a while before he finally says something.

"You're awfully stubborn," he speaks lowly, almost to where you can't hear him.

You chuckle, a smile gracing your lips. "You sound mad about it."

He smiles too, looking down as he places another rinsed plate into the dishwasher amongst the others. "Not mad. Just an observation."

You want to ask him: anything else you've observed about me? or do you observe me often? But you don't. It sounds borderline sad even in your head. So instead, you stay quiet, keeping that tightly bound secret attached to your heart just as you promised yourself.

As if he reads your mind, he breaks the silence again. "Was Danny bothering you tonight?"

Your brows furrow, but suddenly that jaw clench of his from earlier all makes perfect sense. You play along.

"No. Why?"

He smirks again, almost like he's biting his tongue at your response. You can't help but smile again, turning your back to the sink as you lean against the counter.

"So you liked it, then? You liked the attention he was giving you?" Jake finally looks at you and you swear your heart stops. His piercing gaze sees right through you, and against your better judgment, you challenge it.

"And if I did?"

He breathes out a laugh, almost shocked at your pushback. "You can't lie to me, Y/N."

You're taken aback, but you're unsure why. He can see right through you. "Who says I'm lying?"

He steps closer, towering above you even if not by much. His aura is anything but small even at his average stature. "I can tell. I see it in your eyes."

Your heart is nearly beating out of your chest as he steps even closer again, even if this isn't your first rodeo with him. Even if he had taken you over his shoulder and carried you to whatever surface he could fuck you on until you couldn't see straight all too many times before, that one look he gives you never fails to steal the breath from your lungs and light a fire between your thighs.

"And I'll bet you wanted me to grab you from that chair and take you right there over that dinner table, didn't you?"

Jesus Christ. The way he speaks with such depravity renders you speechless as it does nearly every time.

"Jake..." you try your best not to look at him. If you do, the rising blush on your cheeks will give you away in an instant. You liked it.

You couldn’t help but like it when he talked to you like this. Speaking so filthy when the two of you are alone yet so outwardly polite and respectful when others were around; only allowing for hushed whispers of iniquity that beckoned you back into the darkness with him. It was exactly where you wanted to be.

"No?" His voice is almost teasing now. "Didn't want Danny to see me absolutely wreck you? All spread pretty and bent over? Didn't want that poor boy to realize he doesn't stand a chance with you? He couldn't handle you even if he tried."

"You know I don't want him, Jake," you finally look at him and your tone is soft. So soft it makes his heart flutter and his dick twitch in his pants.

"I know," he affirms. "You only want me, don't you, baby?"

You can't hide from him so close to you, not when there's a conversation. It's odd that having him buried deep inside of you, muttering sweet nothings as he coaxes you to an orgasm is a better hiding place than when he's standing in front of you, eyes staring holes through yours as he waits patiently for an answer.

"Yes," you finally answer. "In a way that makes me fucking crazy. You make me goddamn crazy and I can't get you out of my head."

It falls out of you before you have time to even stop it and now you're angry with yourself. The messily-tied bow that held your secret that you safeguarded so closely to your heart was now untied, dissipating into thin air. You can only hope it lands safely.

The silence for a moment is physically painful until he smiles. "So I was right then?"

You shake your head, confused. "What are you talking about?"

Jake smiles even more. "You do think about me all the time...just as I said the other day.”

You're truly at a loss for words now. He hasn't given you a definitive answer to your proclamation just yet. You don't think he will. You think he'll just ignore it and turn you back around to face the kitchen counter and take you from behind to christen his new house just as he'd like to. And even if his guests are just in the next room, you'd let him. But then he does answer.

"It's okay, baby. So do I," he reaches his hand to gently hold your cheek, his thumb caressing your cheekbone. "And not just about the way your tight little cunt feels around me, all snug and soft and warm. Or the way you taste…the way you moan my name so pretty it makes my heart hurt. I think about you; I think about your sweet smile, your rather adorable little laugh... the way you carry yourself... and even your goddamn stubbornness," he chuckles. "And I think about the way you look at me."

You feel like your heart is beating out of your chest and the air has been knocked from your lungs. "How do I look at you, Jake?"

He scans over your face for a moment to take it all in, as if you'll disappear before his very eyes at any given moment. He adores you...and you can't believe you could've possibly missed it in those fleeting moments of intense pleasure that he gives you. "Just like that. With that look...that look that's gonna make me fall in love with you all over again."

And later that night, when all of his guests leave and he takes you up to his bedroom, half unpacked boxes still cluttered around various spots of the hardwood floor from his move, he shows you how much he's truly fallen.

He took his time with you, kissing nearly every inch of your body that he could place his lips on. And he fucked you just as he’d been doing for the past month or so, but it felt different this time; maybe because it was different this time.

"Stay," he whispers softly in the haze of your climaxes, reaching his hand out to stroke your cheek just as he did in the kitchen hours before. And so you stayed, wrapped up in the sheets next to him as he pulls you closer, lulling you to sleep.

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[wardenofthefade]

I have unwillingly seen the latest Discourse surrounding the number of choices made in previous games (spoiler tag stuff y'all I beg) that matter in Veilguard and people are mad because it's like 3 or something and bemoaning the death of bioware now and

I mean guys I'd love it if they'd account for every last little choice we'd made and give us extra content but they were never going to do that. When I think back to Inquisition VS the size of the Keep, it's laughable. Genuinely, what decisions mattered from DA2 or Origins, materially, in Inquisition? Who you made King/Queen in Origins. Did you do the DR or not. What happened to Alistair, I suppose. And then we had a few codex entries, sure, to account for some of the others. But so many other choices did not matter. Did Leliana die in your Origins run? Wellllllll she's still here (we'll do some text on an ending slide for ya). Did you help Dagna join the Circle?? Welllllll she's here but she'd be here regardless! LOL!

At the end of the day the choices given in the other games IMO were basically worthless. I just played Origins & Inquisition to completion, and the only special choice that pops into my mind honestly is the fate of Connor.... and that's just whether or not an NPC is hanging out in Redcliffe or not. Again I'd love it but like. I have never felt like our choices actually mattered much to begin with lol. They matter in the game you're playing, and then the carry over is iffy. I want that carryover as much as anybody else, I just knew it wasn't gonna happen. I don't think this will feel any different from how Inquisition felt.

Ok now I go crawl back in my spoiler-free cave until the 31st of October. Just had to rant slash laugh for a minute here.

[nenynrawrites]

Welllllll...Here's the link to the post :p

@tobbesdiscordkitten I thought I already posted it, but uuh...It's been a month apparently xD

,,You know...You'd make a really good daddy..."

Axl blinked. He was sitting behind you on the bed, having his arms loosely wrapped around your stomach, watching the TV intently.

,,Where did that come from?" A nervous chuckle, followed by him holding you closer, though you asked yourself if that was even possible. ,,And, in what sense?" You could hear the smirk in his face, as he peppered kisses all over your neck. ,,Literal, and, you know..." Your body felt all tingly, making you squrm. ,,I know? You're not telling me, so I can't help you with that sugar." You hated him for how he made you feel, but it was a recent random moment that made you think about it:

Every now and then, Axl would rent out a porn film, because why not spice it up a bit? Plus, that way, he learned more about what you like whilst you enjoyed yourself (he always chose the ones you like). So one night, you two were watching a new film, when the main actress called the main actor ,,daddy". At first you thought it was weird, but how it was portrayed with the power dynamic shifting to something somewhat...Helpless, but still caring. And for the next days to come, the thought wouldn't leave your mind. Until now. Where you've built enough courage to ask or basically call him that. And as much as you thoughg he'd be weirded out by it, he was, in fact, happy about it. It made him feel...Strong.

,,So, you want to call me daddy, hm?"

Your mind was blank by now, and Axl was using that to his advantage, whispering all kinds of things into your ear.

,,Just want to feel good, hm? Be a pillow princess and all that, yeah?"

You weren't able to answer, as Axl pressed a kiss to your lips that literally took your breath away, turning you into a puddle in seconds.

,,Don't know what to say now, hm? Gonna let you lay down, yeah? Let me do the rest..."

~-~

If this wasn't heaven, you wouldn't know what was. Axl was thrusting so painfully slow, but hitting every spot, so you weren't really mad about that. And hearing him call himself ,,daddy" made both of your brains short circuit.

,,Such a good girl you're being...Fuck, just like that...Only want to feel daddy's cock, huh? Begging him to fuck you dumb with it." For once it wasn't you who was drooling, but him. You could see how his mind was working overtime, wanting to let go but also not lose control over you. But after another minute he couldn't hold back anymore and he came so hard, his body was still shaking when you had already came and calmed down.

~-~

,,You know...You should call me daddy anytime...Don't know what this was but it was so fucking good."

You smiled, giving him a kiss on his head as he fell asleep, still in you, but the closeness is what you both needed and wanted:>