#..well

[st4rryyynight]

★the urge to grab that energy drink out of my fridge and drink it is strong, yet I have already drank a monster energy drink yesterday. decisions decisions...★

[astrxlfinale]

[100,000 credits have successfully been transferred to account: [lulz.io] ]

[ Please wait 5 to 7 system hours for transaction to complete. If you believe this transfer was made by mistake, call [XXX-XXXX-XXXX]. ]

HONES IN ON ONE PARTICULAR DETAIL.

Oh. These bastards thought they were slick in trying to rile his hopes and dreams. As someone who finds themselves dumpster diving in the realms of Calyx, pulling forth countless riches required riches for appropriate upkeep!

The credits sink truly was endless, that universal of law was quick to be recognized. So why not go and make this mysterious number get some feedback?

Even if it was out of order right now.

Text: I know where you live.

Text: And I won't hesitate to turn it into some ground pancake all of your neighbors can laugh at.

Text: I am indeed, not making this a happy, fun haha type of game.

...

Why does he get this viscerally detailed over text??

[teaboot]

I love that I share my house with one of the most efficient apex predators millions of years of evolution could produce. I love that two of nature’s most prolific machines met and were like “hmmm. We should lay around and do nothing together”. Now we’re both fat and happy and full of meat. The hedonism of it all

[schrodingersbobbynash]

id: a tweet from pop tingz. "max announces the release of the 'luigi mangione: the ceo killer' documentary on february 17th."

hey! just a reminder this alleged "ceo killer" hasn't been convicted of anything, hasn't even gone to trial, was taken into custody without being dna tested or fingerprinted (what fingerprints they did find near the scene were entirely circumstantial), didn't have any contact with legal rep before his extradition hearing, and wasn't identified as a facial match by the fbi's top notch ai software. just don't watch this doc, it's bound to be full of bullshit just like tmz.

[shamebats]

Join me on my journey to finally unbalance my hormones, toxify my body, boost my inflammation, maximize my cortisol and absolutely destroy my gut health.

[emolgana]

[tio-trile]

Something something vampires have no reflection so he can't even try to see his brother's face anymore when he looks into the mirror

[wishfulsketching]

Girl dad Silco is a source of endless entertainment for me

Extra doodles:

Someone save Sevika, she is in hell

[captainobviois]

Training my parents to be funnier

[pangur-and-grim]

also I got a tattoo partially re-coloured today and they bandaged me in veterinary wrap like I'm a sick horse

[eepykeepy]

true story

[pinyatapix]

most funniest sudden deviation from a youtuber’s typical video lineup i’ve seen in recent memory

like bro imagine being SO pissed at the direction a show had taken that you have to momentarily quit spongeposting in order to talk about it for two whole hours. king shit

[blorboresidue]

one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.

[skyrim-forever]

big plans tonight

[etz-ashashiyot]

Happy freedom weekend to all who celebrate!