#Artist did a good job and was very kind to do some revisions ^^. Will definitely request another comm from them in the future :D

[massivementalitynut]

My Desperate Couple Comm from @negativesd09

[solomon-revisited]

my copy has finally arrived... sixteen old songs from my earnest friends

THE CORONER'S GAMBIT LINER NOTES

TRANSCRIPT:

HE was a guy from California who'd fallen in love with a woman from Iowa. She was working at a water testing lab. They lived in a very small house whose pipes froze every winter. The landlord would come by and put space heaters under the sink. Years later, they retained the memory of the water coming back on - the sudden sound of the shower, the rush from the sink. They slept on a foam mattress in the bedroom in the summer, and on the couch in the living room in the winter, since the house did not have central heating, rendering the bedroom essentially uninhabitable from December through March.

They were not really the kind of people to plan things: they had fun when and where they could on an austere budget. The ice skates they bought used from Play It Again Sports made for fun Christmas mornings on West Indian Creek in Nevada, one town over from where they lived. He learned to cook, and to bake: they didn't go out to eat, because there really wasn't any place to go out and eat, though on occasion they would get a pizza from Casey's, because their town had a Casey's. Under the right circumstances a gas station pizza can be just the thing, and they sometimes found themselves in those circumstances.

He made music which was slowly reaching a wider audience. If he played in New York or Chicago as many as a hundred people might show up. He was idly entertaining the idea of becoming ambitious about it: as a child, he'd been pretty pretentious, and although he was working hard to shake most of that off, a little pretension isn't a bad thing in an artist. Just as a seasoning, as a little extra flavor here or there.

One summer he took a job as a harvest help at the Farmers Cooperative Exchange down the street from the very small house where the pipes froze in winter: getting the corn and soybeans into the grain elevator and into a big Morton building where the beans formed giant mountains, which he sometimes had to climb to knock down the peaks. If you don't knock down the peaks the beans get too hot and might rot. The job didn't pay much, and he wasn't good at it, but during slow stretches he would write song lyrics on scraps of paper or in a small notebook, and when he got home from work and washed off the crop dust, he'd set the lyrics to music. "Elijah" was written like this. So was "The Alphonse Mambo."

He took a Greyhound bus to Omaha to record some of the songs, so that the album would have a nice varied feel to it, but he got very sick, which is not an uncommon thing to have happen after a Greyhound ride, and only a few songs came out the way he wanted. He kept those, and then they got married and moved to Ames because the City of Colo had purchased their home from that landlord and intended to knock it down, which they did do, he affirmed years later: and in Ames he put the album together, and then later they moved to North Carolina and a whole lot of other things happened, too, but the main thing is that this album is a document of a time when two young people in love hadn't yet located the spot on the current that would carry them to their destination, twenty-five years later, parents of two beautiful children, worlds away from Colo, the place where, for better or worse, as the saying goes, all this really began.

Dedicated to my wife, Lalitree, and to the City of Colo, Iowa.

This is the original text of the paper bag that housed the first edition of this album. I am leaving it intact rather than revising it. Stage Bidet's moment comes ever closer: let the people tremble in fear.

Elijah, Baboon, Horseradish Road, Onions, and the Alphonse Mambo recorded in Omaha with Simon Joyner, Chris Deden, Lonnie Methe, Brad Smith, John Kotchen, Steve Micek, and Pat Oakes. All of them are owed money and are to be treated with deference and respect. Five of the remaining songs were recorded at Main St. in Colo, which is a small town in Iowa, and the rest were recorded two blocks north of Emma McCarthy Lee Park in Ames, which is a considerably larger town half and hour west of Colo. Though happy circumstances currently have the Mountain Goats claiming Ames, we continue to straight up represent Colo and will put the slap down on anyone who disrespects it. Transfer and levels by Bob Durkee at FBE in Pomona, California, with Joel Huschle attending. As a result of some regrettable but inevitable conversations that took place during the transfer, Bob, Joel, and the Mountain Goats have formed a new, super-powerful punk rock machine called Stage Bidet, and we urge you to watch for us and clear us a wide berth whenever we're in your town. Instead of thanking all the people I always thank to whom I say, collectively and with no less sincerity: thanks. I am just going to spend the time left us here addressing an absent friend. Rozz: I wish you hadn't've gone and killed yourself. Though I hadn't seen or spoken with you in eight years since that night when, as far as I can tell from the reports I was later able to piece together, you tried, not without reason, to strangle the life out of me out there on the landing of Damien's apartment and I probably never would have ever seen you again anyway, it was still hard to hear that you were gone. All your friends had been predicting your death since the early eighties, and no-one could bear the thought of you growing old, but none of that did anything to soften the blow when I heard. I don't really believe that the dead see or hear what we do out here in the realm of corruptible things and I don't imagine that the anyone reads the scribblings on the backs of album jackets to them, either, so I am really only addressing a memory. To that memory I say: I thought of you now and then when I was writing these songs. I don't suppose they'd do much for you, but I thought of you all the same. All your friends miss you in some way, a little or a lot. The rumors about your final hours are dismal and tawdry: I am sure they would please you immensely. For your sake, I hope that the Christians were wrong and that you were right about whether the faithless are destined for eternal torment. In the event that you are a ghost and are wandering the earth moaning and rattling chains, I moved to Iowa from California four or five years ago, stop by any time. Have a seat on the couch until I get home from work. Help yourself to anything in the refrigerator, or to the whiskey and sake on top of it. Make yourself right at home.

Album cover design by Tom Hart

[bimboficationblues]

2024 was a mixed bag. I spent a lot of it malding about my job, but fortunately I am no longer there and have a new one (family lawyer for DV survivors). Idk if I want to keep being a lawyer long term but rn I am making more money, doing more interesting (but potentially taxing) work, and hopefully it will level out to something either tolerable or useful.

long distance with my love is still sad, and we found that polyamory did not really alleviate those pressures, but we have taken some good steps towards a different approach, starting with a monogamy trial run. I found dating around mostly unpleasant despite some exciting possibilities throughout the year - very few people seem to really know what they want and act accordingly. ultimately poly started to feel like I was chasing after an ideal, and I do believe I’d enjoy that ideal. but when the process of pursuing it is so exhausting and unfun and crazy-making it just doesn’t seem worth it. the lesbian connections I found frequently ended because the other person started acting like an avoidant abject meow meow and I simply don’t have the patience.

as far as bringing the long distance to a close, I'm not sure how that’s gonna happen - I love Chicago and I don't want to leave my people. for the first time since maybe high school I do not feel fundamentally lonely and I think that's a feeling worth taking seriously. I've been really overjoyed by my various friendships, both near and far. but I miss my gf dearly. she has my heart. I don’t feel like I’ve ever loved or been loved like this. It’s a difficult situation.

I did get to travel a lot which was nice - this year in addition to regular Washington visits, including one to Olympic National Park, I also went to Barcelona, Toronto, Montreal, Cleveland, and Philadelphia. I am visiting my love's hometown currently and while I was kind of dreading it a bit it's turned out to be overall very pleasant and comforting and nice to see where she came from. Plus I did some visits to the family in SC.

speaking of which, I am feeling generally at ease with my parents. I feel like I've been able to accept that they are limited people, but not to such a degree that it makes being around them impossible, and they have also generally gotten cooler about a lot of things. we have a lot in common and it is generally fun to spend time with them despite their foibles. being able to do drugs together also helps. my dad turned 60 this year and my mom has been having health issues, which I do think has made entropy be on my mind a lot more to a troubling degree. dunno how I’ll handle that when it becomes a more pressing consideration but I guess that’s a problem for the future.

last January I made a conscious effort to approach my passions and hobbies more intentionally by making a daily schedule that roughly looked like this:

MONDAY - fiction reading; TUESDAY - history studies; WEDNESDAY - philosophy/political theory studies/writing; THURSDAY - working on music; FRIDAY - watching movies.

I also tried to get some daily activities going on top of all these - listening to at least one full album a day, regular walks, practicing guitar, yoga. keeping to this was inconsistent - sometimes I was locked in and sometimes I'd get derailed by other priorities (spending time with the love, seeing my lovely friends, getting stoned, travel). sometimes certain activities are just easier (reading comics is always fun and also minimally demanding of my energy, social media and doomscrolling is a tempting time-sink). I might try and revise this approach in some ways - I might want to take a harder tack with how much time I want to spend on each activity - but I do think that even just being deliberate and structured about how I spend my time made my mental state significantly stronger. so that is a positive development.

artistically I've made progress on the album, but I never feel like I have enough time to dedicate to it with work and everything else. but I also think my approach of trying to write all the songs first before recording them was the wrong one. so instead I think I'm going to start trying to get what I've roughly finished into a recorded form and in the process a stronger vision of the project will emerge which will help with future songs. this will require me to learn some new skills - I've always worked with a producer before - but that's not a bad thing. my friends and I are also doing a writing workshop so that will be nice to get feedback from people I love and trust.

social media has been real bad for me this past year in a kind of emotionally masochistic way - I found myself hatereading a lot more, which is bad. I’m hoping I can adjust that this year and stop getting brain damage from pissing myself off.

part of the reason for the above is that the political situation domestically and globally is dire and basically I just see cope or rationalization everywhere which, considering the urgency and scope and existential weight of what’s happening, is really infuriating to me. I feel like after a year of some of the most depraved inhuman butchery imaginable, as the ruling class takes refuge in obvious bad faith that is “all the more odious because it is less and less likely to deceive,” and with Hitleritis running rampant through civil society, we need a sober reflection on the challenge ahead of us as socialists. I do not want the ruling class to annihilate the rest of us with them or for capital to find new, intensified, and more insidious methods of shifting crisis around. this is partly why anti-intellectual, regressive forms of Marxism have been stuck in my craw lately, because it feels like psychological palliatives masquerading as politics. I’m not sure what the move is to really turn the tides of the war we are in, but doing away with self-deceiving political impulses seems like a start.

[thenightling]

Willy Wonka misconceptions

As Charlie and the Chocolate Factory / Willy Wonka has become weirdly popular lately because of the successful prequel film and most recently that really botched / rip-off Wonka event in Glasgow Scotland, it felt like a good time for this post.

Here are a list of popular misconceptions about the book and films.

1. Much of the Internet thinks of Wonka as a "Serial killer of children." I pointed out that at the end of the 2006 film and novel you see the children alive, though altered. And in the 1971 film that version of Wonka says that they will all be fine, but a little wiser. Someone tried to argue with me that he was just trying to placate Charlie. Really!? Since when did that Wonka ever lie to make people feel better?

Based on his previous behavior we have no reason to believe Wonka would lie just to make Charlie feel better. It's just a dark, edgy, annoying headcanon to pretend Wonka killed those other kids when every version tells you they survived. I am aware there's a play version where they die but we're talking about the film adaptations and novel here.

____________________________

2. Grandpa Joe was not "Faking it" or "being lazy." It seems ironic to me that so many rant and even get genuinely angry about the character Grandpa Joe. It is especially odd to me when the rage is in regard to the depiction in the 1971 film, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory.

The reason it is odd to me is because in the 1971 film Grandpa Joe very clearly was suffering through severe depression, possibly a long bipolar depression phase.

The depression is clear in his "I've got a golden Ticket" song.

"I never thought my life could be Anything but catastrophe"

"I never had a chance to shine Never a happy song to sing"

It seems weird to me that today people shame characters like Cinderella for not being assertive and empowered when she's a live-long abuse victim. And then you have the people against Disney's The Little Mermaid who say she gave up who and what she is for a man but ignore that she had a song number from before she ever saw Eric, where she expressed body dysphoria and made clear she wanted to be human even then.

And you have a large part of the Internet shaming Grampa Joe for being "lazy" and "faking being sick' while he's literally telling us that he he's been in a severe depression.

It's almost like watching a generation that supposedly respects mental illness and understands depression in ways previous generations didn't... suddenly having a justification to shame someone for having all the symptoms of clinical depression.

Hell, even the song "I've got a Golden Ticket" kind of indicates Grandpa Joe is entering a manic phase. If Grandpa Joe's illness is psychological why do we treat it as not-real? I get so annoyed at how many people mock the character or act like he's a con artist exploiting Charlie.

________________________

3. The Oompa Loompas were not slaves.

It's true that the earliest depictions of the Oompa Loompas were little African people (before the novel was revised) but in all versions he tells the kids that he pays them in coca-beans. That might sound like he pays them in fallen acorns he found in his garden but it's made clear that to Oompa Loompas, in their society, coca-beans are worth more than gold.

Try to imagine you got a job working for aliens who offer to pay you in large bars of gold if you just help him make some gold jewelry. But because gold isn't worth THAT much to these aliens they think you're a pathetic slave, even though Lofty (the Oompa Loompa from the new Wonka movie) probably now has a palace on Loompa Land that he uses as a summer house.

Interesting bit of trivia: Charlie was originally going to be black.

___________________________

4. Wonka (2023) is NOT a remake. A lot of people mistakenly think this is yet another remake. No. It's a musical prequel to the Gene Wilder Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie from 1971. ________________________

5. Lots of fans have "figured out" that the shoe shine boy Wonka sees early in Wonka is Charlie. One small problem with that. This is twenty-something Willy Wonka. Wonka was supposed to be pushing fifty or sixty when he went looking for an heir. The timeline wouldn't work. The director has confirmed that for this reason the shoe shine boy is NOT Charlie Bucket.

And there you go. A list of popular Wonka misconceptions debunked.

[tigerlyla-of-metinna]

Lost scenes/Fics Game!

Thank you for tagging me @valandhirwriter. Im going to copy-paste the rules here:

We all probably have them, those scenes that never made the story, the stories that never went anywhere, all those small and larger bits of love we wrote and still hoard on out hard drives. So now - let's share!

The Rules are simple:

1. Share a piece of fic that you cut out for some reason, or a piece of a fic, that you began and never continued, some lost piece of your writing, be it long or short, prose or verse. Unfinished Art and Illustrations are also welcome.

2. Tag five or more people or about everyone where you are curious for them to share a piece of their writing. Specific questions are welcome, but don't need to be adhered to.

3. Be kind. Let's spread positivity. Show support for your fellow artists and writers. Laughing along is great, mocking is not welcome.

4. Tagging someone back is totally fine, if the person doesn't want to share anything else, or anything at all for that matter, that's fine too.

Mine would be a chapter that I removed from my Emhyr x OC fic A Painting of You. This was before I decided to cut the fic into 3 parts. This chapter would've been a part of Part 2: The Roles We Play. The scene happens after the dissolution of Emhyr and Sarahs' relationship. Morvran Voorhis has a minor part to play here and he reports to Emhyr about his findings (this part was revised in The Roles We Play with Vattier doing the reporting). Read the lost chapter under the cut:

                                               Where Loyalties Lie

Sarah carried a wooden bucket of water towards the southwest part of the gardens, just a few hours after dawn; the wind cold enough to give her goosebumps. It was her job to water the hanging plants decorating the arches that were obviously of elven origins. The climbing vines covered the top half of the arches with its lush foliage and pretty little white flowers. Adjacent to it is a small man-made pond with a fountain in the shape of a miniature tower at its center surrounded by a carpet of white and yellow pansies serves as the central decoration and point of interest.

There were very few guests this early in the morning walking around the imperial gardens. Most were old couples taking in the scenery, admiring the flowers and conversing. They paid Sarah and the other workers in the area no mind.

Sarah lifted a dipper full of water towards one of the hanging plants when she felt something soft brush against her cheek. Startled, she spun around and the water spilled, nearly drenching Morvran Voorhis had he not jumped away in time.

“Easy, milady, it’s just me.”

“Oh General, you startled me” she said, hand against her rapidly beating heart. “Did I get water on you?”

Morvran used his free hand to brush away the few speckles of water off his fine blue-gray travelling coat.

“No harm done. Most will probably think I got caught in a light drizzle”

She noticed he was holding a red rose in his other hand. That was the soft thing that brushed her cheek.

“For you, milady”

Sarah took the rose offered to her. She smiled.

“You should do that more, smiling I mean” he said.

Sarah chuckled, feeling a blush rise. She saw the ragged end of the stem and gave Morvran a scolding look.

“You shouldn’t be cutting flowers from the gardens, even if it’s for good intentions. Especially in this sorry state. The workers carry pruning shears, you know.”

He inclined his head to the right and smiled. “My common sense abandoned me when I saw the rose and thought of you.”

Her face took the same shade as the rose. The general definitely knows his way to a woman’s’ heart, or under their knickers.

Sarah shook her head and changed the subject. “What brings you to this side of the gardens, General? Certainly not to see me.”

He raised his hands in front of him. “Please, call me Morvran. Only my men call me by my military title. And the emperor of course.” He added and shrugged. “I have an audience with the emperor a few hours from now, so I decided to look for the garden trobairitz.”

Apart from the gardeners and the emperor, Morvran also knows her secret role.

Sarah placed the rose inside the bucket in an upright position.

“Haven’t you heard? Concert has been postponed, for the foreseeable future.” she said.

Morvran twisted his lips and exhaled through his nose. “I heard from the visitors about it. Shame, I was hoping to hear you sing while I pass the time until my audience. You are greatly missed, milady.”

Wow, he certainly laying the charm down thick!

“Gen- I mean, Morvran. Just this once, I will grant you an exclusive performance as an apology for the near drowning. And as thanks for being a gentleman.” She added.

Morvran gave her a deep bow. “An imperial officer must also be a gentleman, milady, and I lead by example.” He offered her his arm. “Shall we? The inner courtyard should be available and empty at this time.”

Sarah crossed her arms and cocked an eyebrow. “You expect me to sing in my garden gear? Take me to my cottage so I can get my lute and change into something more suitable.”

He grinned.

“Your command is my wish.” Morvran picked the bucket with the rose and offered his arm once more.

Sarah did not refuse.

The inner courtyard was completely empty. Perfect for a concert of one. Morvran sat on the stone bench, leaning back while Sarah sitting adjacent to him strummed her lute.

She had changed into a more casual wear of white long sleeved cotton blouse, dark green trousers and plain brown half boots. She did not dress to impress nor wore any jewelry. And since it was just the two of them, her mask is on the bench beside her.

She chose to play one of her original compositions: about a young girl who followed a hummingbird deep into the forest and finally found a place to call home. The young man was a captivated listener.

“Ow!”

Morvran was out of his seat in a flash and sat beside her.

“What’s wrong, milady? Are you hurt?” he took the lute from her as Sarah inspected her right hand.

She winced. The nail of her forefinger was split in the middle just enough to break the skin. Blood began to trickle slowly down her cuticle.

Morvran took out a white handkerchief from his trouser pocket and folded it over her hand.

“Thank you, Morvran. I think I neglected caring for my nails for so long. I should’ve heeded the aestheticians and wore gloves when gardening.

“I should take you to the physicians-“

Sarah shook her head. “This is a small thing. In less than an hour the bleeding should stop. Thank you. I’ll return to you your handkerchief after washing the bloodstains off.”

“Please keep it milady. I am just relieved that you aren’t in any danger.”

He was still pressing the cloth against her hand.

“Um, I can take it from here”

“Oh, pardon me.”

It was quiet for a while. Morvran picked up the lute and tried his hand on playing, strumming random notes out of the strings.

“If you don’t mind my asking, Gen- I mean, Morvran, what is your audience with the emperor about?”

Morvran looks up and rested a hand on the strings, abruptly cutting the sound. He reached inside the opening of his coat and showed her a corner of what appears to be a several folded papers. Then he tucks them back inside, close to his breast.

“Not exactly an audience, but to deliver information of significant importance to the emperor. I am required to hand them to him personally.”

He looked glum.

“Is there something on your mind?” she asked.

Morvran exhaled and looks at the decorative tree: the centerpiece of the inner courtyard.

“I know of the troubles the emperor has with the Merchants Guild. I’m sure he has mentioned it since you are a member of his council.”

“No, he hasn’t said anything to me about it” she lied, not giving any hint of her involvement. “What does this have to do with you?”

“I am a member; or rather I inherited the membership from my father.” His eyes looked both ways, confirming the privacy of their conversation, and then he leans forward. “I’m afraid the emperor is excluding me from any meetings involving the guild.”

“You are upset that the emperor doesn’t confide in you.”

“I am in the emperor’s service, and I’ve proven my loyalty to him time and time again. Yes, it troubles me that his majesty doesn’t trust me, or my devotion to the empire.”

“Do you trust the emperor, General?”

Morvan looks up and saw she was serious.

“I trust the emperor”

“Then trust that what he is doing is for the good of the empire. When he has need of us, we will be summoned.”

Morvran was quiet, taking in that simple counsel. It was a command he’s familiar with. It came straight from the emperors’ mouth. It revitalized his resolve and dedication. Sarah added.

“He does nothing out on a whim. Decisions are his to dispense, and if it meant excluding us from his confidence, he is doing so to protect the empire and the people.”

“The emperor excluded you as well.”

What is it with Nilfgaardian royalty stating facts instead of asking questions for confirmation? Am I that transparent?

What Morvran said, was the truth. Emhyr still hasn’t summoned her in dealing with the guild, and it was her idea. Or could it be because of their soured relationship that he isn’t seeking her help? She was willing to aid him on a professional level, nothing more.

She gave Morvran a sad smile. “Yes, but he can count on my help when he seeks it.”

Morvran nodded. “Then I shall give him no reason to mistrust me. Thank you for your counsel, Lady Sarah.”

The chamberlain appeared to take Morvran to the emperor’s office. Morvran gave Sarah back her lute and bid her farewell. The chamberlain gave her a nod of acknowledgement which Sarah returned. Both men left the inner courtyard.

Sarah removed the handkerchief and inspected her injury. The bleeding has stopped.

She picks up her lute and mask, puts it on gingerly to avoid aggravating her wound. She looks to the direction of Emhyrs’ office.

Despite our past, you can count on my help, Majesty.

Sarah decided starting that day, she will not avoid him, but she won’t try to attract his attention as well.

If only she could train her heart to be indifferent when he parades his lovers in within her sight.

___________

Moments ago, in Emhyrs’ office

“These are the reports our informants in Oxenfurt gathered about Lady Sarah’s origins, Your Imperial Majesty.”

“My thanks, General Voorhis. I trust you’ve read these and made your conclusion.”

“Yes sire. The information is still inconclusive. We’ve not enough proof to make a conclusion about Lady Sarah’s origins.”

“Damn that Viscount. I swear by Ard Feainn he is getting more and more incompetent with each task. Did you garner anything in these papers?”

“Yes sire. Base on the available intel, there are seventy -eight Sarahs enrolled at the Oxenfurt Academy. The spies are combing through each one of them and so far, none match Lady Sarah’s description. We’ve even included the years she may have studied there.”

“None?”

“Affirmative, sire. But, as I’ve mentioned, the information is still inconclusive.”

“Hmm.”

“If I may ask, Your Imperial Majesty, did Lady Sarah mention anything during her supposed stay in Oxenfurt? A date perhaps, an instructor or a collegue?”

“Sarah mentioned in passing of a Cidarian noble. Remus, I believe his name was. Pass that to Vattier along with my demand that he better show me results before I decide I have enough of him pussyfooting around and hand his job to someone else.”

“A noble for a colleague. If this Remus is a nobility of high station… Oxenfurt separates the high nobility from the general student body. I’ll have the men look into this Cidarian.”

“Very well. Give the orders, general.”

“As you wish! At once!”

________________________________________________________

I taggeth @bittersweetbark, @jawanaka, @traumschwinge, @smehur, @alphagravy and @gauntermetaverse

[whatwouldmynamebe]

So I’ve been thinking about those questions you should always have an answer to. Like how do I answer them? It feels stupid to say fun movies like See How They Run. But that is the type of movie I like. So I had a think about media and my thoughts on it and how I (emphasis on this being a me thing) use it.

I mostly like movies as background noise or fun, hence see how they run for fun or movies I’ve seen so many times (for some reason one of those movies for me is the two popes. I am not catholic or even Christian). However that feels like a “bad” answer. But something like bullet train or a meaningless action movie doesn’t feel dumb. It’s like the only movies that can just be for enjoyment are action. But i am very picky with action.

Also animation is so often less mature or not seen as real movies or shows. Like my favorite show is Hilda. But animation is often seen as less than than live action. Disney seems to be pushing this idea a lot too. But like animation is awesome, and makes anything possible. And there are so many styles and options. And real voice actors (some screen actors are good but some are just terrible) are so talented and skilled and bring a character to life. I love animation and I know next to nothing about it.

I like some shows and movies that are serious but saying anything with actual meaning feels too exposing, or too open to judgment.

But music is a different story. My music taste is just so varied. Will I repetitively listen to Seasons of the witch, don’t stop me now and I wanna be sedated for an entire day? Yes. Will I obsessively listen to openly left wing music? Yes. Like I have a playlist of fun old songs, I also have a political playlist, a Disney playlist, a Eurovision playlist, glamour magick playlist, a revision playlist, a feminist playlist (this one is my most recent that I made and it builds in anger, in the yelling way, from female rage to riot grrrl). Like I use music for so many things. How do I chose one song? One playlist? One genre?

Oh and separating art from the artist. I kind of have a system (which is mostly cognitive dissonance). If they make media aimed at children or what the did/said was to children and was not the norm of the time (because I did classics and therefore like books by pedophilic slave owners) and feasibly accessible to them then I won’t interact with their media. Like I loved Harry Potter, the wizarding world, all of it. But I will not support JK Rowling because her transphobia could be found by kids who like Harry Potter and go on social media (because as we know kids do even if they shouldn’t). Why kids? Because kids don’t really think through what they see. They just absorb what people say. People who make media for adults like the Smiths, can openly express those opinions. Like I as an adult can look into the smiths stuff and see Morrissey be anti immigration and actually think, no I think immigration is not this terrible thing, because critical thinking is a skill I have learned over time. I make some exceptions, like I don’t listen to the Orion experience even though their music is not really made for kids. To be quite honest most of this has been based on figuring out a way to justify consuming media I like by people I don’t agree with. But like what if I’m answering one of those questions and I didn’t know a controversy and it sounds like I support them or don’t act on my morals but to be honest I don’t think that about other people so I might just be overthinking things.

Why can’t we just go back to “What’s your favourite colour?” and “what’s your favourite animal?”. You can tell plenty from that and it’s easier to answer, but not dull like “What’s your job?” “What’s your degree?” . Like you find out something about their opinions but not too much. And people are less opinionated on it so won’t husdge you on it.

Honestly I don’t know. I’m just going to stick with bullet train, and come up with something for the other questions.

[castlebyersafterdark]

Writing anon here again! These are all great questions vinny.

"I watched several documentaries not long ago on the writing team at SNL and how they all write individual sketches and then collaborate and change lines and scene directions and jokes, so....

I've found collab on actual creative writing is verrrryyyy difficult for me so maybe this is part of my mental block of "well how... does another writing begin to fill in the puzzle pieces when the creators already have most of the overall picture?"

I'm not sure SNL is a good example as it's first and foremost live television - plus, it's comedy, which is very different.

But if you look closely at ST, I'm sure you would start to notice idiosyncrasies of individual staff writers. Kate Trefry said that ST scenes typically start with onomatopoeia transition sounds (whoosh, vrooom, ssssssss) and finish on long, lingering stares between characters. Not sure if this is only her episodes, but I can already think of a few examples in the show off the top of my head: mike's plane touching down in Lenora; Max staring dramatically at Steve in family video when they're about to explain what happened to Eddie.

But when it comes to creative collab writing, it really does come down to the old resilience that creatives need to learn if they want to work professionally. And it's not easy!

I've been reading a book on writing craft by the great editor sol stein, and he's always reiterating that even published writers he's worked with for years have trouble allowing their latest manuscripts to be edited. Ego is a powerful thing, and writers usually do think their work is kind of untouchable lol. But writing can always benefit from revision by a skilled editor who understands writing. The adage 'kill your darlings' is famous for a reason! Nope, it doesn't mean kill off Will Byers (<3) but rather - your writing will always benefit from some tough love. If anything, anything, isn't working for the story, rework it or bin it.

Well, what is essential? What's working well? That's the skill of a writer to figure out, and where collaboration and feedback becomes so important. It's hard to be objective and see through fresh eyes, but it's essential, because I'm afraid the audience does not care about your story like you do. They will happily skip through it if they are not absorbed. So it's your job to make them desperate to know what happens next.

And so often, things you love won't actually have the effect you thought they did. Readers and viewers are imaginative and need very little to fill in the gaps. In fact, they prefer it when they get to use their own imaginations a little, and not be told exactly where the desk was in the bedroom, or exactly the colour of the walls, or exactly what your character was wearing unless it's essential to the plot or characterisation. This is called exposition in screenwriting and is often an insult to the audience's intelligence.

(And as you can imagine, learning writing craft while seeing the rationalisations that mileven fans use leaves me feeling a little sorry for the ST writers who have worked so hard to make Will's sexuality storyline beautifully subtle, and to turn the audience from rooting for Mike and El to being curious about Mike and Will. I think they've done a stellar job - the audience is truly going to be surprised to return to Will Byers in s5. Byler would be a plot twist, no matter how many fans think it's glaringly obvious, and a good one at that).

As for collaborating, something they teach you if you go to school for creative writing (or art) is how to collaborate, accept feedback, be critiqued without taking it personally, and learn from successful artists - all things needed for you to improve. And also great general skills for life, adding to the old resilience!

In short, you need enough emotional detachment, but not too much that you don't care about your story deeply. ST is obviously a passion project for the Duffers, and sure, they've self-indulged a few times (cough Steve), but they are able to delegate and allow others to work with them because making a good piece of art is more important to them than their own ego. This also explains why lots of writing you see in non-professional settings, like fanfiction, suffers in terms of what is often considered 'good writing', because the writer is often using it for different reasons. They might be using it as therapy or as wish fulfilment, for example - it all just depends on what you want your writing to be.

x

Really loving your long responses, it's so sweet of you to explain and indulge because I'm really honestly interested in this subject. I'm pretty content in my current life, but there will always always be a wistful gap in my heart that will wish I used my higher education years in english/writing but, oh well. Path didn't lead me there. Life didn't go that way. Still have the passion. You can always learn more at any age and I'm still very young in perspective.

I see the toughness in editing in my own job, kill your darlings is absolutely a big struggle there, though not so much in those specific terms. Someone thinks they wrote up a good campaign and really stood by their copy, sweat and tears over s stressful project, and peer review tears it to shreds or the client rejects the submission and you have to start over. It's happened to me and I've had a few "storm off to the bathroom for a moment alone in an embarrassed rage" feedback moments. Absolutely. And this is corporate bullshit. True creativity?? Even worse. Team collab and turning over creative control to another - it's a specific mindset and skillset. For sure!

Readers and viewers are imaginative and need very little to fill in the gaps. In fact, they prefer it when they get to use their own imaginations a little, and not be told exactly where the desk was in the bedroom, or exactly the colour of the walls, or exactly what your character was wearing unless it's essential to the plot or characterisation. This is called exposition in screenwriting and is often an insult to the audience's intelligence.

This is something I absolutely struggle with as a fiction writer - sometimes I want to describe things in such rich, explicit, specific detail because I can see so clearly the setting I'm writing, like a television set dresser and props master, wardrobe and all. I can see it. I'm painting with words. But it's not all needed or necessary and can weaken, I know. I think in prose some is good and essential but does writing a script need it? When do those details come in then actually? Because filmmaking is story and visual. Is this where directors differ from the script. Writer/directors with hands in different elements of the process. I need to find some really deep dive book or textbook on the filmmaking process. I want to know everything. Being in this fandom and thinking of these things is keeping me so curious. I want to learn...

So many good points in your ask, about fic writing as well as the "twists" inherent as well as the beauty of subtle storytelling. All great topics. Thank you again for this, lovely ponderings.

[talenlee]

Game Pile: Here To Slay

New Post has been published on PRESS.exe: Game Pile: Here To Slay

Kickstarter has given rise to a particular genre of game which I think of as ‘crowdfundable.’ When you make games on kickstarter it’s very important to have an appealing hook that is communicated visually very distinctly; you simply need a sense of aesthetics to hold what you’re creating together. This means there’s a bunch of games on the market now, games that are pre-emptively successful, which are most notable for their aesthetics and the presence of important artists or setpiece gimmicks, that set precedent for a greater audience of designers to iterate on, and where the underlying game is maybe a bit deserving of a few more iterations of revision on the rules. Y’know, where just being good looking and being attached to an existing brand is enough to get units out the door so the actual game experience underneath it can be a bit ropy.

Oh hey, Here To Slay, what are you doing here?

In this game, you are competing to be the ones to defeat monsters, first or to gather a party of six different types. You can summon a hero into your party, can then do things, if they roll a dice, meaning that any given hero is kind of unreliable as they join your cause. Every hero can have an item equipped, but only one item. You can always goose dice rolls with ‘modifier��� cards that let you push your numbers up or down, and there are magical spells that represent single game actions to keep cards flowing around without dice rolls being involved. Finally, for any given hero, item, or magical spell, opponents can always play a Challenge, which gives you a slightly worse than 50/50 chance to get the thing you were doing.

You defeat the monsters by rolling dice to do the thing, and you need to fulfill a prerequisite to be able to roll those dice, like your party has to have a warrior or a druid or an actuary. If you successfully defeat a monster, you get a passive benefit that follows you around, which serves as an incentive to take out the big monsters even if you don’t want to do them as a means to win the game.

If you’re familiar with Magic: The Gathering or other complex strategy games you might appreciate the systems at work here; there’s layers of counterplay, with the Challenge cards representing an omnipresent ‘you could lose’ option, and modifiers to mess with dice rolls to try and make sure you can smooth out bad rolls.

The numbers and types all dovetail together quite nicely; in any given game, an ideal hand can go turn one, play three heroes, turn two, play two more heroes and immediately win the game, creating a vibe that imagines an ideal success that will almost certainly never happen.

I don’t like Here To Slay as a game, as a game designer. Not in a hilarious ‘oh wow, look at what a bad job these idiots did’ way, but rather just that the game is composed of competently constructed things that don’t quite connect. If a student handed in a game that played like this with prototype art, I’d want to point out some problems.

The first big complaint is fictional. Er, that is, the fiction of the game. It’s definitely built around the vibe of a dungeon adventure game, to the point that iconography, spell names, and monsters are all drawn whole cloth from classic Dungeons & Dragons stuff. The thing is, in those games, the game is fundamentally a narrative adventure about finding things, fighting harder things, getting better from the fighting, and triumphing over a boss monster. The monsters can also be defeated by a sequence of rolls, representing how big and difficult they are. Here, they’re a simplified single roll, and you’re competing with other people to be the first to do it. What’s even weirder is that one of the normal ways people debase the narrative of ‘go fight an avatar of evil’ stories, money, isn’t present. It’s not like there’s a reward for being the one who beats up the dragons.

The characters being unified by race and class also presents a problem here. One of the strongest things of D&D is the way that your dwarf warrior and an elf warrior can be unified by their warrior-ness and who they worry but different in how, because of who they are as warriors. It flattens things in the name of visual communication, and ties ‘class’ and ‘race’ together. I don’t like that.

It’s fussy and bitty as well in ways that don’t quite justify themselves. You can get a version with standees, which don’t communicate more information but do increase the table presence of what I’d normally see as a card game best recarded for how little table presence it demands. The dice mean that the play area needs a space for rolling which would normally be occupied by a discard and and draw deck. These are things that are kind of at odds with one another.

I don’t like the rolls at all but I can appreciate their purpose in the game’s systems: They’re there to make it so that the play outcomes are uncertain. You need that uncertainty, because if you didn’t have it, the game system could very easily collapse into non-games in one or two turns. Challenges stop the game from advancing, because advancing the game puts you close to winning, and stopping someone from winning forms the bulk of the endgame, where cards are held and people wait to see if they can do something to win in one turn… and then everyone holds their breath until someone else finally acts.

Fundamentally, what frustrates me the most about this game is the way this excellent aesthetic is layered on a game which feels like a very strong 7/10 design. Every part of the game’s visual representations is something someone had to work hard to make, and demonstrates a beautifully interconnected philosophical perspective. It’s got all these wonderful visual details about how characters have different sized bodies and shaped relationships to weapons and powers. The potions have different details about how they’re corked, and all the hero cards match in colour palette with their symbols, and their mechanics reflect their symbols as well. Simply put, there’s so much work put into this game aesthetically, that when those aesthetics rest atop a game whose systems are … just…

A bit wrong?

It’s a little despairing. This game looks good. I wish it was as good as it looks.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[myloansclick]

Things to Do When You Want to Start Your Own Photography Business

Artificial Intelligence is supposed to take away jobs. However, in reality, it is a negative message about the powers of AI.

Think of its potential to help humankind. As a matter of fact, the most recent and revised definition of this statement is that AI is not meant to replace people; but they are here to help.

With that being said, we might take note of a few kinds of work likely to be done by AI better. Mostly, manual works fall in this category. Manual labour, such as writing a very informative email or preparing an invoice, can be made by AI faster. We can definitely get AI assistance in that. Even if AI does things such as writing or painting, or even coding, it will help you make bigger and better outcomes.

The point of telling you all this is that AI influence cannot invade human thinking. Creativity is an undeniable and definitive feature of the complex human mind. It is predicted that the more creative the job is, the less likely it is for AI to influence or control it. Photography is precisely this kind of job. 

Is It the Right Time to Start a Photography Business?

It is all about the love you put into your work. Besides, the market has a good place for photographers. As mentioned earlier, AI cannot influence photography greatly as it did some other jobs. Since it is creative and one needs a human to handle and manage a camera to snap authentic photos with the right message, photographers can see the possibility of that upward curve in their jobs. Therefore, this is a good time to start off with your photography business if you want to. 

Why Photography Business?

If you have a deep connection to snapping photos, then you can turn it into a career. That said, you do not have to leave your day job just yet or stop your academic career to start a photography business. You can also start it as a side hustle and then build blocks on it.

People who are interested in visual content and are inclined to create them are often found in media spheres as photographers; editors; digital painters or graphic designers or artists etc. If you have a passion for photography, if you are well aware of camera technology and techniques, then you can turn your passion into a career to earn more money. I have seen people earn money just by using their phone cameras.

Photography jobs are still available in the market. However, they might be few. Besides, you can earn a lot more by being an entrepreneur. If you are still confused about it, then the following points can help you decide:

It is a more cost-effective business than most other businesses 

You can easily earn money by turning your hobby/ passion into work

A photography company can work more flexibly than a random business

You might get to work by travelling 

You can meet clients from all industries

You might gain fame, which can get you a professional benefit 

Photography can give you a good benefit when you are working with it in the right ways. Managing and maintaining a photography business is not at all problematic to troublesome. However, it is a business, and you must stay serious and organised with your work. 

Should I Go for Photography Education before Starting a Business?

You can and you should. It does not, however, mean that you must have to go for a photography degree. Yes, it must not have to be a bachelor’s program. You do not need a degree course for photography. If you are already studying somewhere though for a degree in photography, then you need not be pondering over it though. You have already got what you need.

However, you can start your photography business backed up by a simple, random photography diploma program as well. You might find these courses online as well. You might get these courses at low costs. But if you suffer financial issues at the moment and cannot organise the money from your savings, then consider taking out one of the business start-up loans in Ireland online. Contact an authentic private lender to get these loans. They are also known as online direct lenders.

Can you not start your business without learning photography? Well, you may not need a certificate (although it is of great use), but you will need learning. Some people are experts in camera and photography without a college degree or other kinds of certifications before they have been taking photos since they were young and were also learning along the process. It made them well aware of the camera and its use. On that front, you can start off quickly with your business. Nevertheless, learning is always helpful. You can enhance more skills later by taking an online course. 

Start Your Photography Business in These Easy Steps

It is not that difficult to start off with your business as a photographer. Keep these simple steps mentioned below in mind. Make your work organised. You will surely see yourself earning money satisfyingly. 

Understand the equipment you will need. You can snap great photos with your phone. However, getting clients to work with you might be easier if you show them you have a real camera and accessories. A mirror-less camera and accessories will be the things you need. 

You also have to start by making your portfolio. You can snap new photos or select the best photographs you have already taken. Now, upload them to an online website as your portfolio to share with clients and employers. You may also print your photographs and make a physical portfolio to produce your work for your clients. 

Making your website reigns supreme as a strategy to help you get and build your online presence. Of course, you will have to buy a domain. However, you may not need to have coding knowledge to make your website. If you cannot afford to create a website that’s expensive, there are a few free platforms, such as WordPress, to help you make a website for free. 

Build your business. Market your brand online and offline. Take the help of a marketing team or a marketer to get clients to talk to you. Make videos and upload them on video-sharing platforms and your website to get higher rankings. In the initial phase, you want more people and businesses to see and understand your photography. 

Is It Possible to Work as a Photographer If I am Unemployed?

Many people decide to start a business after employment. If you want to use your skills to earn money after employment, you are welcome to do so because you are taking a conscious decision. If you are short on money, then direct lenders can offer you loans for the unemployed. Ireland has a promising number of these private lenders to help you out. You just need to reach out to them.

Now that you know a few important things about starting your photography business, you can give it creative thought. Go ahead and learn more about the photography business and start your own soon. 

[the-antiapocalyptic-man]

A daughter of the dark dimension; a man who loves peace so much, he’ll kill for it; a master martial artist with a metahuman aversion field and a love for flaming hot cheetos; a quantum superman re-discovering his own humanity; a detective who has no answers, but merely a Question; and a genius inventor with a legacy to uphold and a mystery to solve

These are the Living Assault Weapons; this is the L.A.W.

a disparate group who often found themselves at odds with each other, none of the weapons strictly like each. Zelda Zanetti took a spot on the insistent of her mother Senator Eve Eden. Peacemaker seeks to atone for the crimes of his white supremacist father, the White Dragon. Sonia Sato is on a quest of revenge against the man who killed and betrayed her father...supposedly. Nate Adams is the ostensibly leader and powerhouse, but his eyes look towards other worlds, journey that will lead him and Zelda down a strange route. Renee Montoya does what she can honor her friend, Vic Sage, and seek true justice in a world of corruption and half-measures. Ted Kord is just trying to survive the group of violent, unstable weirdos he’s found himself involved with.

Among this group are a couple odd companions: Goff, an alien butterfly with good intentions but extremely questionable methods, the strange angel on Chris’s shoulder; and Skeets. Ted isn’t sure what’s up with Skeets, but the thing can’t ever seem to get dates right, and almost all of them seem to be future events. It also seems to miss someone very much.

Things came for a head for the group during an altercation with a competing team, Waller’s Task Force X, in which Chris murdered the Suicide Squad’s handler, setting off a chain of events that would change all of their lives forever. At least, those it didn’t end.

[notes]: so some of the takes here are a bit more obvious than other, but let’s run through them real quick.

Nate we’ve seen, but here he’s got a new “paint job” so to speak, as well at the implication that he eventually takes on the identity of Tim Zanetti (Breach in canon), linking him to...

Zelda! So this is Nightshade, with a couple drastic tweaks: Eve is pushed up a generation to serve as senator in place of her own father, while Zelda is technically an OC, but also very clearly a composite of Nightshade with HBO!Watchmen’s Sister Night. Tim Zanetti is now the equivalent of Cal Abar.

Chris is literally just John Cena, though now he’s part of LAW when he kills Rick Flag instead of betraying him from within the same team, since the Starro incident is much earlier and tied to Wonder Woman’s proto-JLA instead.

Sonia Sato is basically her canon self in a version of the DCEU costume, thought I revised her backstory so “Rip Jagger” was Yoshio Sato’s student who betrayed him, and she’s on a quest to avenge her father...kind of. There’s a twist on that I want to noodle on a bit, but otherwise Rip is now at very least a traitor, sidestepping the white savior trope unfortunately baked into Judomaster’s original concept.

Ted’s also pretty simple, though I wanted his costume to look a little more comfortable and homemade, almost Venture Bros-adjacent. Skeets is obviously a nod towards Booster Gold, but I thought it would be fun for him to find a malfunctioning version first and then meet Booster some time after leaving LAW and taking a spot on the League.

Renee’s inspired by her Final Crisis costume she wears on like five pages? Idk, I really love that look. I was originally going to use Vic because he maybe fits the time period this is taking place a bit better, but decided against it so I could give him a different kind of story later. (Or sooner. Technically his design is already done, but I might rework it since he’s not on this team anymore).

Also, idk if it needs to be addressed, but I did give everyone except Nate and Sonia guns. Zelda, Ted, and Renee have more sci-fi ray guns that do weird stuff, but Chris does have a straight up desert eagle. I actually didn’t realize I’d done this until I was uploading the initial sketches to color, but I think it makes sense for differentiating LAW from the League and its offshoots. This is essentially a Suicide Squad competitor drawn from a different pool of candidates and working for General Eiling instead of Amanda Waller.

Given the nature of the team and personalities involved (as well as LAW’s irl comic being fairly short-lived) it shouldn’t be a surprise that this group does uh...not stay together long.

[rumblelibrary]

Hello, it's me again, your friendly neighborhood... Hungarian?!...👀❤️

Can I request a Sebastian Zöllner fic, where he is a coworker of Reader, and there's an obvious sexual tension, attraction in the office, they sit opposite each other, legs touching sometimes, hands touching... Idunno... Things like this 👀🔥 but nothing happened... Yet...🔥🔥

Never an Enemy [Sebastian Zöllner x Fem!Reader]

Word count: 5k

Warnings: A bad mouthed journalist with strong opinions about art and performance that might offend

Author’s note: Did I let this idea simmer in me for ages? Yes. Did I ever stopped thinking about it? NO.

You hummed softly while the music blasted in your headphones as you made your way up the stairs to the headquarters of the Art Tribune, the art focused magazine you worked for since over a year.

You liked the job even if to deal with artists was hard and the pay check could really deserve an improvement, it was stimulating and surely kept you on the edge. That morning in particular you needed to revise some background stories and just loads of reading to do to work on a new article for an upcoming exhibition. Just the usual fact checking, but you just couldn’t do it at home the day before so you decided to come early and enjoy some peace and quiet at the office.

You arrived at the top of the stairs of the fourth floor with a groan, you told yourself you had to do the stairs because you spent 70% of your life sitting in front of a computer, kind of self care, but brutal. You groaned lightly going straight toward the little kitchen installed for the team when you noticed something in the empty shared room full of desks. It was actually a really nice place with big industrial style windows that let lots of light inside, a very smart environment to work in, with areas where you could relax, free Wifi and loads of facilities. Usually people were put in big desks together, facing each other, trying to push a sort of ‘community feeling’.

Inevitably most of the people created barricades with books, and pictures of their dogs or even empty coffee cups. Yes, all cute and artistic, but do not talk to me.

That’s what also the attitude of the man you shared your desk with on your first day. He whined like a child for twenty minutes, complained he was happy to work alone, followed the assistant of the editor around the office and created a barricade of catalogues between the two of you so thick that you wondered if it was also bulletproof, only to rest his elbows over it half an hour asking if you had the change for the vending machine. Yes, that random man was you colleague and friend, Sebastian Zöllner.

The same that you are witnessing now asleep on the desk, head resting on his crossed arms while a stand of saliva went down on his shirt, wild hair and shoes taken off.

He could be considered an attractive man if he wasn’t a bloody nightmare of a person. You actually worked a lot with him and enjoyed his presence most of the days, your characters folded nicely and you would bounce off his attitude. He was strong on biographies and annoying the shit out of others, so he was always nagging at someone, you included.

You smirked slowly tracing his hair with your fingers, he never looked so innocent and you were always surprised to learn how those messy hair were so soft. It wasn’t the first time you did that gesture, sometimes he did lean his head like this only to be touched like an annoying mewling cat that needs attentions. “Kaffee��� He mumbled making you chuckle, such a an annoying brat and he didn’t even open his eyes.

You carried on walking to the little kitchen room to prepare some coffee for you and your desk partner. You shook your head aimlessly as you started wondering why the man is here at this hour and if it was really a good idea to wake him up. To have him awake means to be able to do little to zero.

You watched the coffee get ready, the comforting tune of your morning playlist getting you still on the good side of your mood as you poured the coffee in your mug.

Then you saw it, an arm sneaking in front of you and taking the mug from your hand, you jump scared in a second almost pouring the rest of the coffee on the whole kitchen counter only to encounter Sebastian sleepy figure behind you bringing the mug close to his nose and inhaling deeply the aroma before having a gulp, you stared at him as his jaw clenched, his eyes got a bit teary. “Fucking hot” he whined making you chuckle, he deserved it for stealing it, luckily you were already doing some more for him so he stole your favourite mug but you had some coffee for you left.

You pulled off your headphones leaning them on your neck “No idea you’d be sleeping at the office, weren’t you off on some interview ?”

He shrugged “yeah, well me neither, but interviewing sculptors is always annoying as shit and those are always supersensitive” he said opening the freezer and pulling out some ice cubes from their box and putting them in the coffee mug. “Scheiße!” He cursed as the ice cube landing in the mug caused the coffee to spill onto his white shirt. You pressed your lips tight against each other not to laugh into his face, but he was already pissed off and it wasn’t even proper work time. You watched him lean over the sink trying to wash it off somehow without even bothering to take it off, just adding chaos on chaos.

“Y/N! Do not laugh and try to help me! Beside, the heck are you doing here at this hour?” You rolled your eyes at that comment, but you didn’t indulge him in that request.

“I was just looking for silence”

He nodded like he didn’t believe a single word of it, he was just an asshole and you had to deal with it like it or not. You almost hated how he was so freaking good at writing and that’s probably why many people indulged him. Even you knew his pieces on the magazine and didn’t expect to find out he was so…so Sebastian.

You let out a breathy chuckle taking your mug and making your way to your joined desk letting him wrestle his balance over the kitchen sink trying to get the stain wet and not shower himself in the meanwhile.

You sat down at your spot leaning the mug on side, hands covering your face trying to keep a clear mind letting out a big breath “okay, let’s do this”

You turned on the lamplight on your desk pulling out your laptop from your backpack. As the computer was ‘waking up’ you stared at Sebastian side of the desk compared to yours.

You had like a little citadel of books around you, but it was pretty neat, a little succulent gifted by your friend for your first day at work with the name tag ‘Danny’ on it sitting beside the lamp, lots of pencils and pens of different colours and notebooks to no end. If you had something in common with that beast of a man was that you both still relied on paper for sketching ideas and write down impressions in the moment, then onto the typing.

His side, however, was like a contemporary artwork in itself. Half empty cigarettes packages everywhere, the ashtray filled up, paper inside books and books filled with more papers. Notes everywhere, the damn king of neon yellow post-its, stains of coffee and crumbles of food invert corner, his red laptop showing off like a punch in the eye and his satchel bag always hang or thrown around.

You often wondered if the cleaning stuff just gave up on him. Your lucky guess was that he would probably throw a fit if anything was moved, so everyone just played the blind eye.

He was good at throwing fits.

You watched him come back sitting in front of you, half of his shirt soaked in the attempt to clean it up, he licked his lips picking one empty package of cigarettes looking in it and throwing it away until he found one with still something in it and he lighted his cigarette as he turned on his laptop. You sighed opening the window to let the fresh air not getting you intoxicated.

You went back to sip your coffee and stare at the screen quietly, every now and then your eyes falling onto the little cloud of smoke in front of you.

Sebastian was an attractive man, that was undeniable and you were sure that made him also a successful interviewer even though he was so random and chaotic, when he was silent and collected in thoughts he was indeed a sight to be seen. The dark hair framing his face like he was some cherub, his deep eyes staring into the void of his own words as he typed. He had a sort of decadent look on him.

Slowly the office begun to get filled, people coming here and there to tease Seb about coming early and he just waving his cigarette around asking for silence.

“Zöllner””

The chief editor shouted getting into his office without even turning around. Seb rolled his eyes looking at you as he pushed the cigarette in the ashtray waving his hand around to dissipate the smoke around him before standing up.

“I wonder how he managed to survive few days without shouting my name” he smirked.

You looked at him and mimicked his smirk.

What a chaotic man.

You had finished your reading by then and started to make a first draft of the article you were meant to work on.

“Y/N!!!” Sebastian voice rang through the office making you jump on your seat and he gestured at you to go with him with a big wave of his arm.

You looked at your screen with an helpless sigh, it seems like you will not write that article anytime soon, you’d better just have slept an hour more.

You stood up following that incessant wave as Seb put his hand on your back to get you in a bit quicker.

“Good morning”

You said as the chief editor nodded quietly “Look Y/N, it is a big favour I have to ask you” he begun frankly as you were beginning to get worried “you did your time with silly articles, so I thought it could be interesting to pair you up with Sebastian to go to tonight’s exhibition of Evita Schnecke”

Your eyes went wide as you looked at Sebastian shrug his shoulders.

“I need somebody to keep the horse with tight rains” Mr Megelbach continued gesturing with his pen at Sebastian and then at you “and you will dip your toes in those big time artists environment, but we really need to make sure Sebastian won’t hurt anyone’s sensibility, her interview has been obtained with lots of hard work”

“Yeah, we all know that hard work” Sebastian whispered in your ear earning a glare from Mr Megelbach who handed you a couple of catalogues from that artist and the invitation.

“So, put on hold your current article for today, make a plan with this train wreck and please make sure he doesn’t show up dressed like that”

“That was unneeded”

“All precautions are always needed with you, and now get out of my office the both of you”

You nodded moving out of the office, you were a bit anxious. Those artists were unpredictable just as Sebastian.

You made your way back to your desk with him as you sat down looking at the invitation. “So, it begins at 9 pm” you said almost understanding why Sebastian shouldn’t be allowed to go unescorted because the invitation on the dress code had: Wear something that talks about your soul. Only that could bring Sebastian to have an aneurism.

“I hate that bitch”

“Seb, that’s not a good start for an article”

He smirked as you said so but shrugged

“I mean it, this woman was born into privilege, she portrayed herself to be this underground rebel, but her simple black dress was a Chanel and her everyday boot Balenciaga, so I don’t trust her for a reason”

You smirked as you could agree with that and showed him the two catalogues the boss gave you

“Choose your fighter”

He groaned so loud he could have stabbed his toe and he leaned over his side of the desk picking one from your hand giving a light pinch on your side “teacher’s pet”. You chuckled softly as he always said that.

“Tell me if you read something that it is not about the performer’s way of life” he mumbled opening it in front of him.

You begun your reading and it was indeed the hell pit of a vey spoiled kid who was told to be the greatest since the first day of life, you picked your notebook and opened it taking notes on things that you could ask about.

Sebastian in the meanwhile lighted up another cigarette rolling it between his fingers mindlessly, his eyes looking above the paper at you every now and then among the little curses in German about the stupid things written there.

After some time it was becoming really a torture to read and you leaned your back on your chair stretching your legs forward for Seb to catch one of them among his.

You smirked as you often joked to him he was like some bear trap with those legs always catching yours.

He put his hand under the table bringing your leg up onto his thigh as you shifted even lower on your seat, his hand touching your ankle mindlessly as he had a talent for little massages like that. He did it the first time a while aback, a summer day where it was so hot and humid that you couldn’t feel your own legs.

So it became a little ritual among the two of you. You had many of those rituals, it was like an unspoken collection of attentions. Like you making the coffee in the morning because he was a grumpy ass. Or him always buying you some chewing gum or little treat when he went to buy cigarettes.

“I guess I am not the only one that needs a restyle”

He said bringing you away by the tenderness those little actions brought to you when he pushed his finger in your Vans shoe deepening a hole that you were trying to ignore from months.

“Seb, don’t do it, I wanted to make them last another season”

“Another season? These can’t last the end of the month, no doubt why your sex life is a train wreck”

You frowned at him taking your ankle off his hand to push on his chair making him roll back thanks to the little wheels underneath it, but he held on the desk and pulled himself closer again.

“What do you even know about it”

He looked at you, eyebrows raising up on his forehead

“Y/N, if I was your boyfriend I wouldn’t allow you to leave the bed that early in the morning to go to the office and that’s a fact”

“Oh, and how on heaven could you detain my passion for this job?” “Well, I can write you a list about it, you can consider it a to do list on your next date” His smirk was so wide, he enjoyed to tease you like that, the bastard, he knew to be an hottie and he always acted like half of the world was up to fuck with him.

“Oh please, do it, I want to see”

You teased him and he leaned in elbows on the table staring at you.

Oh the sexual tension with him was too much, you always went down on this hurricane of remarks, always him mentioning how you need more orgasms or implying it, or even implying how good he is at giving them.

“But be careful, because any act should be performed and not only lived”

You said quoting the artist you were reading about and he whined so hard like you really stomped your foot on his balls.

“Horrid witch”

“Me?” “No, that one”

He huffed and puffed picking another cigarette. Sometimes cigarettes just died on his fingers as he forgot to actually enjoy them more than waving them around.

The artist herself wasn’t remarkable, she used themes seen over and over before, she had a background as performer/dancer and she added painting to that, but more than talent she had an amazing marketing squad. You read her story and her commentaries about living like in a poem, which always sounds pretty easy with a big bank account.

You did all you could to stay neutral even if Seb was going down to massacre the woman, you two shared a bundle of two sandwiches (or better say, your brought a package of two and he was skipping his lunch so you just handed it to him) until you decided to get parted and go get ready at home.

That evening you were waiting for him in front of your apartment, when a taxi stopped in front of you and his figure appeared waving at you to come in on the back. His eyes widened in surprise “Well, well, well, look who got all fancy here”

He smirked as his eyes travelled on you shamelessly, the dress was actually one of those you brought ages ago and never used, also to wear heels felt like new, last time you went to a fancy event almost hard to recollect.

“Just move and let me in”

You said chuckling as you looked at him being so elegant when you noticed it, the price tag on his shirt.

“Seb, did you just buy this shirt?”

“Yes, and I am going to take it back tomorrow”

You looked at him puzzled

“What?” He groaned “I suck at ironing stuff”

You looked at him as a little laugh escaped your lips as he told you not to, but it was too late for that, you shifted closer to him anyway helping him to hide that price tag better behind his neck. Nevertheless the white shirt was really fancy and fitted him perfectly.

As you arrived in front of the gallery you sighed and made your way inside.

The place wasn’t crowded but few eyes turned as you got in.

“Would you like some champagne?” A waiter asked and Seb picked two flutes immediately downing one in a gulp on his own as the other was still in his other hand, he put the empty glass on the tray and then picked a third one handing it to you.

“Drink Y/N or you won’t make it to the end of the evening”

You smirked as he was always over dramatic, but indeed the evening seemed to be made for posh people to show off how cool they are.

You spotted the artist pretty quickly wearing a Valentino bright red dress, she surely had the dancer figure and gestures which gave her some kind of an edge.

"She is all yours"

You looked at Sebastian already half way through his drink, giving you that cheshire cat smirk.

"Are you sure?"

"You know I will insult her in a second if she names her dancing background one more time, I saw the videos, she looked like a three ready to collapse on the ground" he chuckled as you smirked shaking your head at his metaphor, but he is probably right, he is too much biased.

"I didn't notice the open back before" he said referring to your dress as he caressed over your skin with his fingertips making goosebumps raise up your spine.

"What? Am I too sexy for your own good?"

"Probably" he commented not losing a beat to answer you. You were taken aback from a moment, his eyes still down on his hand touching your back before raising up to find yours.

Then he took his hand away and pressed the cold champagne glass against it making you hiss "Now go, I'll check this bourgeois art"

You frowned but you just moved away from him. He always did it, he teased you and then made it a joke. You gave it back to him too, it was your relationship, that's how you balanced it.

"Good evening " you said to her with a smile holding your glass in your left hand before offering your right hand to her "I am Y/N, from the Art Tribune"

She went from neutral to smiling in a second

"Oh, I was waiting to meet you" she said leaning to kiss your cheek, surely she was a woman with charm, with a degree of boldness that made her charming and also, you noticed, extremely touchy-feely with everyone.

"We can define this a sort of retrospective of your previous works, I liked to see the evolution of it" you lied, because you just saw the catalogue.

But that was fair enough to have her go on about her, guess what? Past as a dancer, about how she needed to express herself, how she was her own muse and all the stuff you already read.

"What is next for you then?"

"I want to follow my dream, I have always wanted to found a space with my name where people could rent the rooms to perform dances and arts"

You stared at her. For real? Like there weren't other hundreds in the whole city?

"What will keep you apart from all the others that did this before you?"

"Nobody is me" she smirked like it was clear and obvious.

You asked few more questions, but you were sad to admit Sebastian was right. There wasn't art there, there was just profit, selling a name, a brand.

This saddened you because you met many artists that had less than a chance to make it but double the talent of Miss Valentino Dress.

"Y/N" Sebastian warm hand was on your back as you were downing the last bit of champagne "Come, come ,come quick" he said pushing you away as the artist clearly recognised him but he dismissed her with some insult or whatever he just mumbled.

"Seb, I was working, what the hell?"

"Elke is here"

You still didn't understand, you were puzzled as the reason of that anxiety was still unknown to you.

"Like your girlfriend Elke?"

"Put an ex in front of it" he said looking around frantically

"Oh, I am sorry, I didn't know"

"No, me neither, I thought she was just bashing around, she always did" his arm sneaked around your waist pulling you closer "please, act sexy for once"

You were one second from hitting his guts with your elbow when Elke herself approached.

"Oh, I didn't expect to see you here" she said waving her glass around

"Yeah, well I work for an important Art journal if you remember"

"How could I forget?" she groaned looking at you then as Sebastian's hand rested onto your hip. Really? Was he acting like you were his date?

"Hi, I am Y/N"

You said politely to her and she chuckled "Run when you can, this man is a leech and you don't even know it"

She mentioned it almost casually, but you could feel all the poison implied on your skin, Sebastian's hand giving you a soft squeeze, you had never seen him like this before. He looked like a dog that just got kicked, his back hunched over you lightly both trying to protect you and for protection.

"Well, thank you for your advice, I must be a real torment too because we actually have lot of fun together, I like his unpredictability"

You said it from your heart, you didn't want to insult her or anything, but you felt bad for him. Even if he probably deserved it, to be humiliated like this must be hard in any circumstance, in particular in a place where he is supposed to work and being known.

He looked at you a bit surprised, he leaned slowly pressing a kiss on your temple and you smiled because of that gesture so enveloped in that feeling of tenderness.

"Your shot" Elke said clearly a bit annoyed that you as she just moved along followed by a man that must be her date.

"Lets go out"

You suggested as Seb nodded and just followed for once, he held your hand as you guided him and for once he wasn't talking or commenting anything.

As you went out he sat down on the sidewalk pulling out his package of cigarettes taking out one immediately.

"Hey stand up" you said to him as he looked up at you and you snatched that cigarette off his lips "let's go away"

"Where? Don't we have to stay until she gets naked to dance?"

You smirked "No, we have all the material we need"

You took his cigarette away offering him your hand as he picked it and you guided him.

He was silent, which is rare, when he was silent it meant he was upset in some way, he always had a nice comeback line for everything usually.

His head leaned on side like a scolded child as he slowly laced your fingers together.

You walked across few streets, your heels clicking on the cement until you made it to your final location pulling him inside.

"Constatinopole?"

Seb asked looking at the sign, it was a kebab place, your favourite by the way.

"I am hungry" you just said making him lower his head and smile like a kid with cue breathy chuckles.

You ordered for the two of you as he went to sat down putting another cigarette between his lips when the man behind the counter glared at him and he just put it back in the package.

He sat down slouching as you did some small talks with the guys there, you clearly knew them. The soft music from the radio holding the place into a sort of magical aura as his eyes travelled over your naked back once more, the need for a cigarette becoming even more urgent.

You two dressed so elegantly really were so noticeable in the bright lightend place, he smiled to himself thinking it could be a nice painting by Hopper.

You came back offering him his kebab with a soft drink, very thoughtful because he was indeed already a bit high on champagne.

You ate quietly together, it wasn't uncomfortable, your silences were happening often at work and always filled with a sense of common understanding, you leaned your leg up like you always did at the office and rested it on his thigh as you sat sideways beside him. His hand flying naturally on your ankle to give his usual massage, his thumb tracing your skin with imaginary patterns as his other hand held the kebab close to his mouth.

The speaker at the radio announcing next song as Rocket Man by Elton John filled the room with a melancholic vibe. You couldn't help but think the song suited perfectly Sebastian, his being out of this word, out of control.

"Thank you" he said at some point as he tried his best not to ruin his shirt, you looked up at him as he was staring, his eyes telling you something on their own "You have been the best girlfriend I have ever had"

He added with a bitter smile diverting once more his gaze, you smiled back at him, he looked so resigned. Maybe it was the alcohol, but you have never seen him so fragile before.

"I could be"

His eyes darted up to you, his surprise evident as he put down the kebab, the soothing voice of the British singer still giving a dream edge to the moment as he moved closer. You slowly shifted your leg to give him room of movement as his right arm sneaked to rest on the back of your chair closing the space between the two of you.

His lips tasted still a bit of champagne as he pressed them against yours, you kissed him back slowly as his left hand travelled on your thigh pulling you closer to him probably staining your dress because of his greasy hand.

He pulled back almost immediately before leaning onto you again titling his head on the other side. This second time the kiss was more deep, more intense. Your hands slowly cradling his face before pulling back yourself.

He smiled against your lips and you smiled back.

Maybe tomorrow you will regret it like Elke said, maybe not.

Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief@thesunflowersutra @zemomybeloved@fictionlandslanddreams@charistory @greeneyedblondie44@apparrio @hb8301@whatawildone @rhymerhymerhyme  @thehuiabird @lilith-blackrose @unbeatablecurlgirl@obsidianlaszlo@alindeluce@zemosimp05 @baronesszemo-blackwood @nocapesdahlingLet me know if you want to get tagged to my publications too <3

[peekbackstage]

Thanks so much for sharing your perspective. I've found your posts very informative and appreciate your time and effort. I saw you mention something about XZ's team not doing a great job responding to the situation, though of course they aren't to blame for it. If you don't mind, would you share your thoughts on what a better response might have looked like, and what impact it might've had if they'd done things differently?

One of the things that stands out most to me is how unprepared XZ Studio was when dealing with a PR crisis. It seems to me like they most likely did not have a strong social media team at the time who would have been tracking any trends or conversations associated with XZ. (By the point at which 227 happened, XZ Studio had already been established for about five months.)

It is pretty standard to track your artist’s name and keep an eye on trending topics, especially to get in front any major issues. As 227 began to develop, had XZ Studio been tracking the development on social media, they could have potentially defused the situation very quickly when the big call to action first emerged from XZ fans to report a fanfic to the government. It was so out of hand, and there was no statement from either the company or the artist that it seemed as though both were complicit in allowing it to continue, which is precisely why so many antis emerged, incensed against XZ’s apparent lack of action to rein in his fans and guide them appropriately. 

Much of the backlash that occurred against XZ and his fans is because there was no initial response when the call to action first appeared - they could have essentially stopped it before it got too far and prevented AO3 and Lofter from getting banned. A simple statement from the artist and the management company to defuse everything could have potentially stopped the movement in its tracks, with the amount of influence XZ does have over his fans.

When things did go sideways, there still was no statement or even an apology from management or XZ, who was being criticized for the actions of his fans. Though it wasn’t his fault (technically), the ways in which his fans behave reflected poorly upon him as an artist and an influencer. Had he taken “responsibility” immediately and apologized, it might not have gone so far as a boycott against him that resulted in so many brands dropping him. 

What I think a better response would have looked like once 227 occurred would have been this:

1. Immediately issue a PR statement condemning the actions of the fans and take responsibility for not initially “guiding” fans properly. Apologize on behalf of the company, the fans, and the artist. Statement should also include a note that states the offending content is merely fiction and that there is no truth to the story. There is no reason to be upset over something that is not true or defamatory, as it is imaginary. (This would essentially be a coded statement denying a certain relationship to begin the process of dissociating and creating a different narrative.) 

2. Artist should issue a statement condemning the actions of the fans and apologizing as well. Call to action for any fans who might continue to act out to behave appropriately. Remind fans that fiction is not real, and to stop acting out against something that is imaginary. 

3. Meet with Weibo privately. Ask them to help with community management to ban accounts that are breaking their TOS. Do this very early on in the process. Also, invest a good deal of money to hire an entire social media management team or a company to heavily monitor Weibo and aggressively report accounts that are engaging in defamatory behavior and potentially breaking Weibo’s TOS. Take legal action against anyone who is actively breaking the law. 

4. Book an interview with a large media outlet or a well-known media personality. Allow and even encourage questions about the incident. Artist should condemn the actions of the fans who caused the incident and apologize to the public for their behavior. Artist should also say something like, “The story is fake/imaginary/fiction/not real.” (Saying something like that more or less demonstrates how dumb all of this is.) I am assuming that questions won’t be asked about AO3/Lofter being placed behind the Great Firewall due to China censorship. 

5. Dissociate from anything and everything that might allow others to continue associating the artist with the incident. In XZ’s case, that means dissociating from WYB, because he’s associated with said incident given the fact that this was all caused by a fanfic. Put a moratorium on kadians and any other potential “interactions” that would allow fans to continue to have “content” to discuss on Weibo. The point here is to change the narrative - this way antis won’t also have content they can use to criticize XZ.

6. While this is happening, call all brands and schedule meetings. Attempt to rescue the brand deals. For brands who are very unhappy, offer a contract revision to suspend the contract terms for a set amount of time (such as four months) to see if the issue blows over. (It’s better to put it on hold than it is to have to try and get a new brand deal, especially once the brand’s annual sponsorship monies have already been allocated for the year.)  

Potentially work with third party PR team to circulate rumors among XZ’s fanbase that he is losing brand deals to create urgency for a counter-campaign against antis trying to boycott XZ’s brands. If there are just as many people calling brands to support XZ as there are calling for a boycott, then it would potentially be a 50/50 toss up as to whether or not a brand deal manages to be saved. This might also lead to a surge of sales for all of XZ’s brands, which would then maybe demonstrate to the brands that XZ shouldn’t be dropped.

7. Track sentiment/feedback once all of the above has been completed. If all of the above didn’t help at all, create new action plan which might include withdrawing the artist from all activity for a set amount of time. 

So there you have it. Maybe a response like the above could have potentially ended up with a different outcome for XZ. Maybe it wouldn’t have helped at all and everything would have still been just as bad. We’ll never actually know. 

What I hope is that XZ now has a better team who can handle issues like this in the future, and that he will see a full recovery for his career this new year. If 2020 has proven anything to anyone watching, it’s that XZ’s consumer power is still massive, and that his popularity has not waned at all. The fact that he is still sweeping all the awards that require fans to vote, often winning by millions of votes, and the red sea that fans managed to put on for him during the Tencent awards are undeniable symbols of his enduring popularity.  

This kind of influence is staggeringly powerful - brands and media outlets that previously might have felt uncertain about XZ as an artist most likely will have positive sentiments towards him as a result. 

So, let’s hope that 2021 will be the best year for XZ. 

The future is full of possibilities and the sky above is endless.

Edit: @pepeyee Made it clear to me in the replies that I definitely did not clarify myself or my thoughts on all of the above well enough, so I will be writing a response to all of the above to further clarify some points so that there is no confusion about my stance here. 

[fyeah-bangtan7]

V: “I have a desire to perfect one cool thing about myself”

As he’s being interviewed, V speaks his mind at a relaxed pace. But there was one moment where he kept on speaking without taking a breath. Look for that moment in the interview below. You listen to a lot of old music on vinyl. Has any particular artist’s music excited you since your last interview with Weverse Magazine? V: I was listening to Louis Armstrong’s music again. And I picked up some albums with a pretty jacket that’s also got a lot of really good hits on it.

How do you feel when you’re listening to those classics? V: I feel like I’m beginning to relax a bit. If I listen to a song when I’m feeling depressed and then really get thinking, the things that are frustrating me disappear, and I can feel myself becoming more peaceful. And it makes me picture things in my head. For example, some songs might make me think of seeing something in front of me while walking down the road somewhere at night when I listen to them. I think setting the mood for listeners is the most important thing. The mood will presumably be different for everyone, but for me, those songs are the ones that are good at setting a really beautiful mood in the moment.

You said that you got inspiration from artists of the past like Sammy Davis Jr. for your performance in “Dynamite.” Was there any artist who inspired you for “Butter”? V: Well, there was Billy Joel. When I shoot a music video, I think of a movie more than any one artist. And when I perform on stage, for some songs I think of the way movies like Reservoir Dogs look. For “Butter,” I watched a lot of teen movies. And musicals. After that I randomly ended up seeing a video on YouTube of some scenes from an old teen movie Johnny Depp did [which turned out to be the movie Cry-Baby]. The image I got from that was really intense. That’s the look I used in “Butter.”

“Butter” felt like a teen musical to me and now I know why. V: I did it like a teen musical, just like you say. When we shot the “Butter” music video, I really, really tried to shoot the part in the elevator so it would feel like a teen movie. Although a lot of takes were edited, so not all of it’s there. (laughs)

What kind of feeling do you get from that kind of teen movie that you find so charming? V: For me, teen movies show a youthfulness that’s appropriate for the age. I think there’s an appropriate mix of emotion, energy, and a completely different and peculiar mood that everyone necessarily experiences at that age. If you watch teen movies, they’re overflowing with energy and full of sunny emotion, but behind it all they’re not as bright as they seem. They are really bright, but the color itself almost feels like some kind of filter. They feel like they have a different filter than other movies, so I tried thinking of teen movies when we shot the music video and put on performances.

That teen movie feeling seems to be divided in two between “Butter” and “Permission to Dance.” By the looks of the thumbnails for the fancam focus videos uploaded to the BANGTANTV YouTube channel, “Butter” seems to showcase a really cool character, while “Permission to Dance” is more teenagers smiling brightly for children. V: The teen movie vibe in “Butter” and “Permission to Dance” are different from one another. We showed the sunny image people usually think of when they think of teen movies in “Permission to Dance.”

Do you think that going with the teen movie vibe influenced your vocals to be the new style that you used? In “Butter,” you still had your signature vocals but without the deep notes, giving them a new feeling. V: That’s because, when we’re given a concept, we have to come up with vocals that fit with the concept. I think my singing style matched up with the concept, so I feel relatively satisfied. There was nothing majorly difficult about actually changing the style itself, since unlike changing your voice, you only have to change your vocal technique. Having said that, even though the notes in “Butter” were high for me, I still hit them! (laughs)

I guess hitting the high notes was your assignment this time around as a vocalist. V: I’ve been working a long time to make up for my weak points. For example, I thought I was weak when it comes to high notes because I sing low parts a lot and I tend to sing in a flowing way. But I had trouble when we were recording “Dynamite” and I had to sing the high notes during the chorus. I got so mad (laughs) so I practiced a lot.

How does it feel to see the results you’re seeing with “Butter” now after all that effort? V: I’m just trying not to rest on my laurels. Like instead of savoring the feeling, I feel like I should go to bed early for everything I have to do the next day? Getting back in tiptop shape quickly is what’s important, so I haven’t really had time to bask in the joy very much. I’m just working hard at the work I had like I always do.In your 

New Year’s greeting on YouTube, you said you regretted not being able to put on the show for ARMY you wanted, and that your 2021 resolution is to “follow my own pace and pattern” when you work on music. Do you think your personal pace and your professional pace are in step this year? V: No. [My professional pace is] fast, so fast. (laughs) We have a lot we have to get ready for since we’re always promoting. It can be challenging sometimes, but in a way, I think it’s also given me a good opportunity to become a little stronger.

I imagine it’s meaningful to do the work for your own songs, because you can slip into your own world. You also made “Blue & Grey” when you were having a hard time, and it consequently became a song that allowed you to empathize with many people and vice versa. Looking back now, what kind of song do you think “Blue & Grey” will be remembered as? V: I think with “Blue & Grey” I just wanted the song to let people know how I was feeling, and how we were feeling, at that time a little better. Obviously everyone was having a hard time, but I think I wanted to share those emotions with ARMY as-is, including the pains we went through in our growth process. And, to put it another way, I think I just felt like making it obvious. (laughs) I thought it was okay to be that obvious, seeing as I couldn’t put those feelings into words. I just hope people could understand how I was feeling; it’s okay if it becomes forgotten later on.

In the “BE-hind Story” interview on YouTube, you talked about the first line of “Blue & Grey”: “Where is my angel?” You explained how, when you have any kind of issue, you close your eyes and wish for your angel to come and think. Are there times when it seems like your angel understands your feelings, as you just mentioned? V: I get a ton of answers by doing it. I’m not religious, but whenever I have some kind of issue, I close my eyes and think about it. Is this right, the way I’m thinking about this, or not? They’re just yes or no questions, like, Does my outfit look good today? Instead of just worrying about what you should do, if you tackle it in the form of a question, you  get a response with the answer.

I guess it could work when you’re looking for inspiration in your life, but what about for your music? In your previous Weverse Magazine interview, you said you make a note whenever you feel something. V: I write in my diary in hopes that it’ll help with writing lyrics and so I don’t forget those feelings. I do it constantly—I open up my diary whenever something comes up. I copy melodies that pop up in my mind, lyrics, and other things from my diary to my notes app temporarily, and when I’m taking a break or I get the urge to work, I open my notes and say, Let’s try this out today, and run over to the studio.

You released “Snow Flower,” featuring Peakboy by V, on Christmas Day. Is that another song you ran to the studio to work on after the feeling came to you? V: For that song, when I was drinking with some older musicians, we were talking about doing a song together, and then we were like, Well, do you think we’ll have time to do that? So we decided to do it right then since everyone was available. My mixtape was delayed, so I at least wanted to play a different song for ARMY, and I thought, since I’m a bit tipsy (laughs) I thought I should try writing something. So I made the song really quickly. In maybe three hours.

Even though you made it quickly, the composition is somewhat complex and it has the same unique atmosphere that “Blue & Grey” did. V: There’s times when I’m, like, in the zone (laughs) and can make a song all in one sitting, but when I’m not feeling it, I end up revising it more and more. And I don’t want the composition to be too obvious, so I try to change up the way the melody flows. With that kind of sharp image coming to you almost immediately, what were you imagining for that song? V: You might think “Snow Flower” is about a type of snowflake, but I was actually thinking about snow and flowers separately. I started hoping that flowers wouldn’t wither away and just keep on blooming on snowy days. But in reality, when it snowed, all the flowers were crushed, the world became blanketed in snow, and I felt like the flower buds turned into snow flowers. I wrote that song about how I felt after watching that happen.

It must be important to feel things intuitively when you’re trying to express yourself through song. V: If it sounds pretty to me: approved. (laughs)

On the other hand, as a member of BTS, you have a job where you have to deal with a packed schedule and keep various situations in mind. How does that make you feel? When you celebrated your Billboard Hot 100 win on V LIVE and the topic of your clothes came up, you joked that you wore them to give off an idol vibe. V: It’s fun. It’s fun, but I could also say it’s hard. The performances are fun. I think idols should shine in a way that’s suitable for their age, and it’s important to do lots of things for fans like ARMY. Not just performances, but also posting pictures, having conversations on social media, making content. We’re artists and idols, so we think each and every one of those things is important. That sentiment won’t change just because we’ve achieved so much success.

You recently held an impromptu event on Weverse for ARMY. V: I’m sure there’s lots of ARMY out there who are tired of not being able to see us in person. But since the only thing we can do for them is to be on stage and stuff, I was worried that we’re not doing enough for them. And I love being able to talk with ARMY so much that now it’s like a habit that I read their posts. I have a thing today. I have a test today. I’m moving today. Somehow I feel better when I hear their stories. When I end up reading things like about how ARMY are living or what kind of lives ARMY have, I can’t help but write a response, and because of that ARMY respond, so I try to become friendlier in a more fun way, too. I want us to be more than the Billboard number one Bangtanies—I want to be ARMY’s partner, their best friend, the friend who’s always by their side when we’re not on stage. It feels like business when I talk about communicating with ARMY. (laughs) I just want to talk with a close friend. I wanna talk with a close friend—that’s exactly how I feel. It’s been a long time since I could see my friend, ARMY. Usually when friends can’t see each other they keep in touch all the time. I can talk about all kinds of things like that with ARMY thanks to the Weverse platform, and because I can hear all about their lives, I think I was able to go on Weverse and hold that kind of event.

You’ve been talking about ARMY nonstop for a few minutes. I was going to ask you how you feel about ARMY, but I think you already answered the question. (laughs) V: They’re just, well, friends I would hate to lose. Friends who seriously give me strength whenever they’re around. Sometimes you find friends like that in life. It’s like that with the other members, and I have other friends who I can share my feelings with. And I have ARMY. So I can’t help but do whatever I can do to make those people smile and make them feel happy.

Well then, is there a song you’ve heard that you want to let ARMY know about? A song that shares your feelings. V: Umm, recently … “No. 1 Party Anthem” by Arctic Monkeys. When I hear that song … I get emotional, somehow. I don’t usually listen to a lot of rock music, but I can instantly feel the band’s emotions with that song. I seriously get goosebumps listening to it, and emotional, and just all kinds of feelings. It’s to the point that, as soon as I hear that song, I think about how I really want to live well.

That song really means a lot to you. V: Actually, I don’t really know what’s up with that song. I don’t even know the lyrics, but I’m quite clear on what sort of emotions the melody and the band’s performance give me.

Don’t you feel like that’s an emotion you want to express to people, as an artist? Like you don’t have to explain your messages in detail? V: I don’t know. I just want to exchange the good, and be the one to embrace the bad. So I have a desire to perfect one cool thing about myself.

So how close do you think you are right now to becoming an artist who has perfected something cool? V: I’ll say 2%. It’ll go up someday later. (laughs)

© source

[r6shippingdelivery]

headcannons for hobbies? Like what they do on their off time?

Hi nonnie! I actually did a Hobbies HC for “all” ops a long time ago. But seeing that was before the expanded bios, and it only reached up to Gridlock and Mozzie, I’d say it’s time for an updated version, don’t you say? 

Some of the answers are unchanged from the old post, because I already nailed it or the new info didn’t disprove my ideas. But I had to revise a lot of the answers I gave the first time around! In order to find their hobbies and/or get a glimpse of their lives beyond Rainbow and what they might like, I read all the bios, and looked up concept art, and elites, and past battlepass content, etc. And when none of that was enough, I just went with my gut instinct 😂 Thank you to @grain-crain-drain, @dagoth-menthol & @todragonsart for bouncing ideas with me when I was stuck! 💕

Hobbies Headcanons for ALL ops (up to Neon Dawn)

FBI

- Ash: According to her savta, shooting things is not a hobby, but Ash disagrees. And since according to her expanded bio she knows Hebrew, Arabic, English, French and Greek, I’m willing to bet she enjoys learning languages as well. - Thermite: He grew up on a ranch and loves riding. He’s also taken an interest in improving gadgets it seems, so my old proposal that he dabbles in forging/smithing stuff seems plausible. And based on this concept art, demolition derbies attending and maybe even competing himself too? - Pulse: He’s interested in a variety of topics and goes through phases of intense, nearly obsessive focus, until something else captures his attention. He still has a lingering fondness for building muscle cars, since it was something he used to do with his father. And like Thermite and Hibana, it seems he might enjoy demolition derbies. - Castle: He’s a language nerd, studying/reading/practicing new languages is his hobby for sure. Since the expanded bio says he rescues abused dogs, I don’t think it would be far fetched he volunteered at animal shelters too.

SAS

- Thatcher: Aside from repairing his boat, The Iron Maggie, he also enjoys fishing. He used to do that with his dad & brothers, and tried to take the rest of the SAS fishing as a bonding experience. It didn’t go very well - Sledge: He plays rugby, and has an inexplicable fondness of trying the wildest ideas that tend to end with something broken, be it one of his bones or a structure or wall (just read his extended psychological profile and you’ll see, lmao) - Smoke: Boxing, it helps him focus all his chaotic energy. And chemistry in general, it’s not just a hobby but a passion of his. - Mute: he enjoys tinkering with stuff, taking it apart and then putting it back together in a different way, just to see if he can improve it or make it work in his own way. Flying drones plays perfectly into that, with the added bonus of being able to do the flying part just for fun too.

GIGN

- Montagne: His main passion is working with people, teaching and mentoring others, and therefore when he’s not on duty, his main passtime still is mingling with people and getting to know them. I could see him making overtures with Castle, interested in the American and fascinated by his knowledge of various languages, an area Monty feels insecure about due to only knowing French and English.  - Twitch: Engineering, robotics and developing an empathic AI is her life.Twitch is a workaholic passionate about those topics. She also greatly enjoys traveling and, according to her expanded bio, people watching.  - Doc: He surely had some hobby at one point, but he can’t remember it, or the last time he had free time for it. Doc is also a workaholic, although one that loves to complain about it.  - Rook: Apparently he’s passionate about cycling, auto racing, and rock concerts. Mainly cycling though, since he dropped out of university to cycle around France.

Spetsnaz

- Tachanka: He collects and repairs old weapons. Mostly soviet, but he has some interesting pieces from other countries too. And he dances surprisingly well.  - Kapkan: Aside from a certain interest in psychology, his main hobby is hunting, of course. But he also whittles and carves wooden figurines.  - Glaz: Quite obviously, painting. He’s an artist, and quite a good one. He also likes playing cards, especially poker. - Fuze: He builds new weapon prototypes for fun. And tests them, if he can convince Six of it. He also likes to bake from time to time, a skill he learnt thanks to his grandma - and because he has a sweet tooth.

GSG9

- Jäger: Planes. Model planes, repairing old WWI & II planes, you name it. And watching copious amounts of documentaries.  - Bandit: His bike is his main hobby, both taking care of it and riding it. He also likes playing pool; and, if pranking people counts as a hobby, that’s his oldest one, dating from when he was a kid. - Blitz: He was and still is an athlete at heart, and Blitz loves running. - IQ: In order to disconnect from engineering pursuits, she indulges in rock climbing, spelunking, and writing science fiction stories.

JTF2

- Buck: He crafts mechanical puzzles, and enjoys all kinds of physical activity that can take place outdoors. - Frost: She just loves being surrounded by nature, and often goes mountain climbing or diving.

SEAL

- Valkyrie: Swimming and diving, of course! She wanted to be a professional swimmer, but now it’s just a hobby. And apparently she enrolled for a helicopter pilot license, and language classes. - Blackbeard: According to the expanded bios, he likes sailing and even participated in a championship. And since he climbed Mount Everest, it’s safe to say he also likes mountain climbing.

BOPE

- Capitao: He loves football, playing or watching it, doesn’t matter, he’s all for it. - Caveira: Spends a lot of time practicing Jiu Jitsu, in the gym and also on unofficial tournaments.

SAT

- Hibana: For her it’s traditional Japanese archery (Kyūdō). And probably demolition derbies too accounting that concept art from before with Thermite and Pulse. - Echo: According to the expanded bio, he has few interests outside work, but I always imagined he’d be into gaming and e-sports. Hacking too, and that’s a direct influence from Dokkaebi.

GEO

- Jackal: He plays the acoustic guitar/spanish guitar, and sings too. And now we also know he volunteers with at-risk youth. - Mira: Fixing cars is second nature to her, and thanks to her expanded bio we know she also does metal sculptures that incorporate used mechanical parts.

SDU

- Ying: Extreme driving, which can sometimes trigger her PTSD, and traveling. Especially exploring cities by randomly jumping in public transport and just going anywhere. - Lesion: He is also one to volunteer in underprivileged areas (like Junk Bay, where he grew up), and clearing mines and other unexploded devices. I also imagine him with a certain gusto for playing blackjack.

GROM

- Zofia: If obsessing about her father’s supposed suicide and the oddities surrounding it, and desperately trying to reconnect with her sister count as hobbies, sure, she has those. - Ela: She’s also an artist, one with a very particular vision that some have called narcissistic. Apparently she also does some “freelance” volunteer work, roaming the streets at night and offering help/comfort, or a willing ear to the people she meets.

707SMB

- Vigil: He likes to take walks around the forest, just aimless exploring and marvelling at nature and any animals he might come across. Often listens to relaxing music while doing so, and he might pick a pretty rock here and there to bring home. - Dokkaebi: Hacking is her hobby, of course. She also has several social media profiles and is an active member in a couple of hacking forums. As per a previous battlepass, I believe she enjoys mountain trekking too. And dancing to electro beat, due to her elite.

CBRN

- Lion: His rebel years left him with an appreciation for rock music and a dream to be in a group. Lion still plays the electric guitar, when he’s not off volunteering at the local church. - Finka: Pushed by her parents from a young age to try different sports, just like her siblings, she eventually discovered a strong love for fencing and ice-skating.

GIS

- Maestro: Cooking, and boxing, an interest he shares with Smoke. But mostly cooking. - Alibi: She’s also a marksman, engages Ash in friendly shooting competitions.

GSUTR

- Clash: She’s very involved in different activist causes, mostly surrounding racial issues and inequality. - Maverick: Photography, mostly nature or candid shots of his fellow operators. I also think he likes horses and riding. And Buzkashi of course, but he hasn’t played since he left Kabul.

GIGR

- Kaid: Playing chess, he’s a good strategist and it shows. And  while dozing off with a cat on his lap is not a hobby, he also loves that. - Nomad: Traveling to all sorts of remote locations, she’s an explorer with a thirst to prove herself. She also keeps a travel journal, which includes maps and some drawings of the places she’s seen.

SASR

- Mozzie: Dirt biking, of course. The more dangerous the jumps and stunts are, the more he likes it. He knows his limits and works to surpass them. - Gridlock: Robotics. She still wants to compete again in robot championships, just like she and Mozzie did so many years ago. She would consider that fixing cars and vehicles has become more part of her job than a hobby, but still loves it too.

Phantom Sight

- Nokk: Fencing, as evidenced by some of her concept art, she participated in fencing tournaments. - Warden: He knows appearances are important, and he cultivated a very specific image, so he likes to take care of that, be it by buying luxury or antique cars, or designer suits, etc.

Ember Rise

- Amaru: Archeology and exploring the Amazon jungle is her passion. It used to be her whole life and job, but since she joined Rainbow, she’s been busy with training and missions, yet she never lost her love for adventure, history and protecting her country’s cultural artifacts. - Goyo: He’s a really good chess player, and enjoys other games where he either has to think, or his usual poker face and calm demeanor can throw his opponents off.

Shifting Tides

- Kali: When she’s not writing reports about her underlings progress, or making lists about who should be ascended/rewarded, who needs to be punished or chastised, etc, she’ll be doing yoga, since it helps her focus. Or hardcore pilates when she needs to burn away some frustration first. - Wamai: Diving and being underwater in general, be it on his special immersion tanks or on the actual sea, it doesn’t matter. He finds it calming (and he’s addicted to the anoxia sensation)

Void Edge

- Iana: Space exploration fascinates her, and she’s always trying to learn everything she can about the cosmos, watching documentaries and conducting her own in-depth research. - Oryx: Wrestling helps him hone his physical prowess, and it’s also a measured outlet for his deep seated rage. He also greatly enjoys reading poetry.

Steel Wave

- Melusi: She’s committed to the conservation cause, which stems from both her love of wildlife and nature, and her protective instincts. She likes to explore too, although she’s not driven by a will to prove herself or reach certain goals, but simply for the joy of seeing natural spaces. - Ace: Social Media. He’s obsessed with his public image and popularity. While he travels quite a bit, it seems he does it more to share new and exciting selfies on Instagram than for the pleasure of visiting new places.

Shadow Legacy

- Zero: He knits and crochets, it’s an engaging hobby that helps him clear his mind, plus he enjoys making stuff too. Not many people know about this side of him though. 

Neon Dawn

- Aruni: She and Hero, her giant pouched rat, volunteer on landmine detection and removal efforts. She also likes to travel extensively, and has done so in the company of Twitch and Nomad.

[bulletballet-arch]

The Revised [ Full ] History of Eve in Picture Perfect

( until I decide to tweak and edit it some more )

In this verse, Eve’s mother Linda would reside in Brooklyn for three years after the death of her husband, William Littlejohn, his brother Malcolm, and Malcolm’s wife Yvette. Initially, she stays in Brooklyn simply because she feels she is supposed to. Her in-laws, Amos and Liza, want to observe her. Similarly, Linda’s parents want to ensure she is fine after narrowly facing death. Haunted by the massacre, Linda suffers from survivor’s syndrome, but she is never allowed to vocalize the pain felt. In the midst of secretly attending therapy sessions ( while Eve is taken care of by her Grandma Evelyn and Papa Giuseppe ) Linda finds that her lifestyle is stagnant. She feels as though she is a woman who does whatever someone else wants. Therefore, Linda decides to move to Manhattan with the five-year-old Eve in tow. They live in a luxurious apartment and Linda makes her living as a secretary on Wall Street while Eve attends ballet classes.

Linda didn’t have to be a secretary, as the Littlejohns (and her father) provided her with money, but she liked working. It kept her mind off things. Sometimes things would feel great until people asked her was her husband the late William Littlejohn. In time, Linda gets a boyfriend who is a stockbroker. He’s white, he’s a recent divorcee and because she worked so closely with him, Linda knew it would be unprofessional to date him. But she thought to herself, ‘this is my decision. It’s okay because I have some control.’ The idea of control was a myth, though. She became his arm candy, similar to what happened within the Littlejohn Family when she initially became linked with William.

Linda could not complain too much, though. Because her new lover was good to Eve. The overall excellent dynamic caused them to get married. Their marriage lasts for four years. Eve is eight years old when they divorce. It’s a divorce that’s long. Messy. He was going to jail for a pyramid scheme was a part of and Linda didn’t want to stand by him. After the divorce - and the trial - Linda decides she could use a break. She decides that she and Eve should leave the country for a little while. Because why not? She has the money. The first country they go to is England, staying in London.

It was supposed to be a month-long vacation, but she kept putting off returning home. She didn’t want to house hunt back in New York, she didn’t want to be identified with a scandal, she didn’t want to see any family. So they began living in London. When Eve is nine years old, Linda would decide to go to South Africa. Eve experienced cities such as Durban, Ghana, Cape Town. While Linda was really in Africa to become more connected to her ancestors, all and all, she thought the experience would be good for Eve. Her baby girl could have a lot of memories of different buildings, landscapes, cultures. And, this exposure did make Eve happy, however, she had no stable school life or friendships. So on a social level, Eve was miserable. She also tried having pen pals, but that only worked for so long before both parties ceased writing one another.  Eve did feel at home when she was in New York with her extended family during holidays like Christmas. Eve’s maternal grandparents wanted her to live with them, but her mother refused it. Eve has a vivid memory seated in the back of a taxi, crying because she didn’t want to go to the airport. And as for Linda - well, she would never notice this, but whenever she was deeply distressed, her mental desire was to just keep moving.

When Eve was fifteen years old, her mother fell in love with a highly esteemed professor from the University of Cape Town. This would be her mother’s third significant relationship. They all began living together and he begins an inappropriate relationship with Eve. It’s all an act of grooming that Eve isn’t aware of. Linda catches on to it and calls out her boyfriend for his behavior. However, he is offended by the accusations. He moves out, but he still contacts Eve through phone calls and  even picks her up from school at one point without her mother’s consent. Eve remembers her mother always asking her questions, ‘did he touch you?’ ‘What did he do to you?’ Eve was overwhelmed, as she felt her mother didn’t believe her. It caused Eve to give her the silent treatment, which in turn caused Linda to decide to move again. This time, they would leave Africa to live in Europe - France, specifically.

In France, the two moved twice. First to Paris then to Lyon. Eve liked Lyon more than Paris, but was much too stubborn to admit it. Part of Eve was worried that if she was open about her love, then her mother would want to move somewhere else. She attended college with a focus on art conservation. Ultimately, she did not fully complete her apprenticeship because she would meet Alexandre DuBois, a con artist she fell in love with.

He did not expose his true nature to her at first, but she began questioning the source of the jewelry he was continuously giving her. When she reached the conclusion that he was a criminal of some sort, Alexandre kept insisting that it wasn’t as much of an issue that she was making it out to be. To prove this he wanted Eve to come with him to a job wanting Eve to participate as well. Eve declined, she wasn’t trying to get in any legal trouble. However, Alexandre said he didn’t like boring women. Offended, she agreed.  He slicked down his hair so it could appear straight. Wore his best suit. Meanwhile, he instructed Eve to dress as though she was going to attend the most extravagant party. When they stood side by side, Alexandre was looking like a wealthy white man with a young, black mistress. The trick, Alexandre told her, was to always act as though you belong. For days Eve waited for consequences. For the police to knock at her door. Something. It didn’t happen. She told herself never again, but she got addicted to stealing with Alexandre, as it became an adrenaline rush.

Eventually, Eve and Alexandre were apprehended by law enforcement. Linda bailed Eve out and told her that if she was not going to continue reaching for her career goals then she would send her to America. Eve would fight back, insisting that she was an adult, so she doesn’t have to go to America just because she said so. Linda then has enough and states that since Eve is a young adult, she can live with Alexandre.  The relationship that would progress between Eve and Alexandre was not without its faults. Even when Eve moved in with him, Alexandre was cheating on her discreetly. He had his alternate hookups and one-night stands, with Eve simply being his main girlfriend. When women smugly confronted Eve of how Alexandre was nothing but a womanizer and she was his latest victim, she fought for the sheer integrity of his name. Behind closed doors, when Eve confronted Alexandre about his inability to be monogamous: he blackened her eye.

The relationship comes to an end when Alexandre gains access to an elite party. During their fumbled job, they would be acknowledged by someone who would be very influential in Eve’s future, Gisella Agostini of the Corsican Mafia. The two would leave the scene in shame, fiercely arguing in the car about who messed up. Eve brings up how he’s a liar and manipulator, only for Alexandre  to rip the pearls from her neck and kick her out his car. She had to find her way back to safety in the dark of the night.

While Alexandre and Eve are separated, the Agostini family does research on the two. They see that Alexandre has a long history of theft, and even a previous murder charge, while Eve just seems to be a college student who got caught up in the thrill of crime. First, Alexandre is snatched off the street by Agostini goons. In what he deemed as an act of self-preservation, he sells Eve out, claiming it was her idea.

When Eve is abducted by the crime family, Gisella confronts her directly. The old woman states that she could fix everything and spare her from her ‘husband’s wrath.’ But the truth is, Gisella’s husband doesn’t do anything in the crime family any longer due to his age and illnesses, but Gisella uses him as a ‘front’ to reign.  Eve ends up working for the crime family,  and in little moments, she ever so gradually speculates she is in the midst of a female mob boss. As the months go along, Eve’s mother wants to make amends but Eve doesn’t want her mother to know she is now gang-affiliated. Eve is very afraid for her life. This leads to more mother-daughter tension due to the lack of communication.  

As the years pass on, Gisella is progressively attached to Eve. This is reflective of how she has her own passion for the world and the diverse people who live in it (especially those of the African diaspora.) In turn, Eve initially grows to feel like she’s a part of some sort of stable family. Ultimately, their relationship gradually becomes overbearing and toxic. Eve is literally feeling like she’s owned and controlled by an old white woman. Therefore, Eve distances herself from dealing with Gisella personally because it was too much. However, Eve continued working for the crime family in regards to assassinations and heists, but she was not eating at Gisella’s home for dinner or talking over tea. Eve decides to make amends with Gisella by the time she is 31. Little did she know, the woman was on her death bed at this point. They were kind to one another and Gisella lets Eve know she can do whatever she wants now. Later that week, the old woman would die. While Gisella’s death comes as a shock - Eve was also feeling relieved. Afterward, Eve has mild conflict with Gisella’s nephew who feels like she should not be leaving the crime family, but Eve insists Gisella harbored no ill will towards her and wanted her to do whatever she wanted. So, she’s leaving.

Eve relocates to New York to begin a new, stable life. It’s what she wants. It’s what she needs. Or so she thinks. She thought New York would have her feel at home and content as it did when she was a child, but she didn't feel this way at all. She felt like a stranger among her family, like a guest or something.  Eve proceeds to sell the art she makes for a living and gains recognition from it. Admittedly, she’s bored with a quiet life. It is entering a relationship with Salvatore Scozzari that sparks her passion for crime, although he would much rather her marry him and live a quiet but glamorous life. But in the end? Eve can’t do it. Breaking up with Sal by claiming she’ll be working at a gallery in California, she travels to another state. Her life as a thief starting up a second time.

[loopy777]

RE: WIPs game: so, haru-tylee. that's one of my favorite crackships right there. what's that doing in your WIPs folder?

Ah, yes, that one. This is the piece that taught that I'm completely incapable of writing an in-character Haru.

I know, it's a weird character to stumble over, but it's true. He's just so bland in personality that there's nothing for me to grip onto. I have to write an exaggerated comedic personality for him in some way, or else the words just stop flowing from my fingers. Writing this small piece was like trying to lift concrete. I can write Azula in the midst of a depressed breakdown more easily than I can write Haru just being a nice dude.

As for why I made the attempt, it was for an exchange. One of the specified pairings was Haru/TyLee, and my only experience with it was that moment in the Chibi short. I figured it would be something fun to try, with a dash of some Romeo&Juliet tension, and would let me write more Ty Lee.

Fortunately, after I recovered from having my soul sucked out of my body, I was able to use one of the recipient's other pairings and meet the deadline (Long Feng/Song, and it resulted in a piece I'm still rather fond of).

Looking back at what I've written, it's not anything bad (except the part where Haru is given the assignment; woof, that's some first-draft writing), but it feels like it's missing some of the SNAP that I like to think exists in my better works. I dunno, maybe if I'd stuck with it, I'd have been able to revise it into something pretty good. Some of my best stuff lacked the SNAP until a little editing found it.

Once again, since this is a relatively short thing that I'll never finish, I might as well post everything I have:

Haru wasn't comfortable with the situation from the start.

When he and his father set out to help liberate all the conquered villages in the entire province, sure, he had been completely on board. It was difficult leaving Mom, but she wasn't a fighter, and Haru couldn't stay behind while Dad went on to help free all the other villages. The other Earthbenders had lent their aid to Haru's home, and it was only right to put his own skills to task returning the favor. That was good work. Not only was Haru living his dream of finally fighting back against the oppressors, he was doing it with his Dad, and together they were continuing their Earthbending training.

However, it seemed that there was more to a war than just saving people and fighting bad guys. An actual General in the Earth Kingdom military contacted their rebel group. This general, Fong, was maintaining a base right near the coast, and doing everything he could to keep his mountainous territory from being overrun by the Fire Nation. The messenger explained that Fong had heard of the rebel group's actions, and applauded them, and wished to direct their attention to an even more insidious threat than Fire Nation conquerors.

The Fire Nation was also trying to destroy the Earht Kingdom's culture. There was a traveling group, it was explained, devoted to showcasing Fire Culture in a manner designed to appeal to the common people. Fong couldn't spare the resources to track the group down and "discourage" its members, but perhaps a small network of Earthbender rebels could find the time? Such a favor would also be proof of the rebels' reliability.

That's how Haru and his Dad wound up attacking a circus, of all things, and taking all its members captive after a small skirmish that barely qualified as a brawl. Most had been caught in their tents and carts, and seized without a fight. Some of the Firebenders had tried resisting, but they turned out to be mere showmen, and were easily taken by the experienced Earthbender fighters.

Then, the rebels had to figure out what to do with their new prisoners of war. That's where the trouble began.

*

The noise that night was unbearable. By midnight, the circus animals still hadn't settled down, and no knew what, exactly, to do with them. "We can't just open their cages and set them free," Dad -- Tyro the Indomitable, as most of the rebels called him now -- said to the assembled leadership. "I don't even recognize half these creatures, let alone know if they can survive in this forest."

Haru stepped closer to his dad. "Also, some of them might wander back, and either attack or lead enemies right to us," he said. Around the fire, some of the other rebel leaders nodded in agreement, and Haru had to suppress a smile. He didn't want to give the impression of having a childish need for validation, but after living powerlessly for so long, it was fulfilling to be treated as a man, with respect, by other people that he in turn respected. He had taken to wearing a mustache not to look more adult, but because it felt right.

Back towards the main tent, the screech of what sounded like a Sky Bison-sized bird tore through the night. Everyone around the fire winced. "Well, we have to do something to quiet them," someone said.

One gray-haired woman, part of the original group that had escaped from the same prison rig as Haru and his father, looked at the younger Earthbender. "You're a smart young man. Why don't you pick one of the prisoners and get them to help. Find someone docile who knows what to do with those dusty creatures, and keep an eye on them. You're young and bold, so you can handle it if they try to give you trouble. Maybe one of the captives will be more interested in helping the creatures than escaping."

Haru blinked. He had fought beside all these people, but he wasn't expecting to be handed responsibility for a personal prisoner. That seemed like a job for someone more... ruthless. "How will I know who to pick?"

His dad chuckled. "Look at their eyes. People can hide their intentions, but not their spirit."

Haru nodded, unsure- but ready to accept everyone's faith in him.

*

All of the prisoners were being held in one of the larger tents, seated on the dirt floor.

Haru hadn't picked the ringmaster, because the man wouldn't stop talking, blustering simultaneously about the troupe's innocence and the coming vengeance of the Fire Nation. He didn't pick the man who professed to be the animal tender, because he was a Firebender who had demonstrated some fine control of his element before he had been dogpiled by a team of Earthbenders in the initial attack; besides, the man had an oily quality that Haru didn't like. He didn't pick the strongman because -- seriously -- the guy was huge!

In the end, it was the trapeze artist who Haru thought was the best bet. She had friendly eyes, seemed well liked by the other prisoners, and didn't seem to quite realize that she was a captive of desperate rebels. Plus, she was just the high-wire act, not even a Bender, so it's not like she could cause much trouble. What could go wrong?

"You," he said, pointing at the girl. "You're coming with me."

She blinked innocently, her gray eyes wide. "Me?" She tilted her head to the side, and the ponytail hanging down her back shifted. She alone in all the circus folk wasn't wearing a straight shade of red; her two-piece tunic used tones of pink, and it somehow made her seem less like an enemy and more like a girl.

Of course, that kind of thinking could lead to trouble. Haru might be a teenage boy, but that didn't mean he had to let his own hormones goose-pigeonhole him as some kind of sap. Dad and the others were counting on him, here. "Yes, you, miss. The animals need to be fed. Do you know how?"

Her face positively lit up with a smile that included her eyes. "Oh! Yes, I know all the animals here! You wouldn't believe how many we have, from all over the world! The bear even knows how to walk the tightrope, just like me!"

Haru frowned. "Bear? What kind of bear?"

She winked. "A platypus-bear, silly. What kind of bear did you think?"

Haru ran his fingers through his mustache. At times like this, he found himself not quite used to the feel of it. "Let's... let's just get going."

*

"And this is Mister Screechy Feathers! He likes cabbages!" Ty Lee frowned. "Actually, now that I think about it, all these animals like cabbages. Well, except for the meat-eaters. I guess cabbage is the universal animal food? Or maybe we just get cabbage at a discount? I wonder who we buy it from..."

Haru decided that it was a good time to interrupt the acrobat and get her back on task.

Again.

"Well, wherever you get it," he said, "let's give some to him and move on. How many heads does he get?"

"Four. I think. Or maybe that was the platypus-bear. Oh well, we have plenty. We'll let him decide." With a giggle, Ty Lee trotted over to the wagon and began piling heads of cabbage under her arms.

Haru watched her carefully, maintaining a chi-connection with the Earth below his bare feet. She seemed harmless enough, but he was ready in case she decided to dash away. Of course, watching her body and her movements so closely, he was acutely aware of what a pleasant image she projected. She was a very pretty girl, and she didn't act like she was a prisoner. Dust, she didn't even act like she was Fire Nation. She was happy, and friendly. She was lighthearted in a way that Haru had forgotten could exist, in any nation.

Was this really the kind of person who could be trying to erase the Earth Kingdom's culture?

Then Haru realized he was staring, and that Ty Lee had noticed. "So, uh, what kind of animal is... Mister... Screechy Feathers?"

"A vulture-griffon," she cooed. "Isn't he cute?"

Haru looked over at the creature -- with a body like a jungle cat, the wings and gangly head of a buzzard -- then back at Ty Lee. He looked over again at the vulture-griffon, then back at Ty Lee. Vulture-griffon. Ty Lee. Griffon. Ty Lee. "Um, I can think of cuter things in this tent, right now," he found himself saying.

"Oh? Like what?" She leaned forward, and gazed right into his eyes.

Haru suddenly had trouble remembering what spoken language was.

That's when she threw a tight fist out at him and punched him hard near his shoulder.

Haru stumbled back, biting back a cry of pain, and tried to raise his hands into a defensive stance. Only one of his arms actually obeyed, and to Haru's growing horror, that came to a quick stop when Ty Lee leaned over and struck again. He stumbled back, more from his continuing state of shock than the pain, but the acrobat stayed with him, swept a leg to catch his own, and pushed at his chest.

Haru fell, and then reality suddenly went away.

*

Ty Lee felt just awful about the way Haru hit his head. She hadn't meant for him to step backwards and fall like that. Weren't Earthbenders supposed to especially stable, or something? Ty Lee thought she remembered learning something like that, but even if her recollection was correct, who knew if it was actually true? Lots of things Ty Lee had learned at the Academy turned out to be mistaken.

Still, she was nothing if not adaptable! As long as Haru was unconscious anyway, she might as well drag him off where no one could find him. That was part of her original plan, anyway, and she so rarely made plans that she might as well stick with this one.

Of course, her original plan also said she was supposed to tie Haru up and then go tappity-tap all the other Earthbenders by herself, so maybe she could make some changes as she went along. Princess Azula had said many times that it was okay. In fact, Ty Lee was pretty sure Azula said that the best plans were the ones that changed and got better.

Maybe. Or Azula said that her brother, Zuko, was a moron because he always changed his plans as they were happening. One of the two. Maybe both. Actually, this was pretty confusing.

Focus. Ty Lee carefully hoisted Haru up over her shoulders, and quietly carried him over to the back of the tent, where the hay-bales were piled up to make a kind of isolated shelter.

"Rrrrawk!" said Mister Screechy Feathers.

"Shhhhh," Ty Lee hissed. Honestly, that vulture-griffon could be so cranky sometimes. Although, Muzan was a pretty cranky Firewhipper himself, so maybe that rubbed off on all the animals he was in charge of training and feeding.

She got Haru over to her hiding place easily enough, and laid him down on a bed of loose hay. Now, her plan said she was supposed to restrain and leave him, but what if he had a concussion? She didn't want him hurt. Or dead! That would be awful! He was nice enough, for an enemy, and she could tell from his aura that he had a strong sense of family and honesty.

So Ty Lee sat down beside him, and hoped he would wake up soon.

*

Haru couldn't tell how much time had passed, when he came to. He had a tough time telling that he was conscious at all, actually.