#Culinary lessons

[scottbiffinchef]

5 Culinary Lessons to Use in Day-to-Day Life

Cooking is an essential skill that extends far beyond the kitchen. Whether you are a professional chef or just someone who enjoys home-cooked meals, the principles of culinary arts can be applied to various aspects of daily life. From organization and preparation to patience and creativity, these lessons can enhance not just your cooking but also your efficiency, problem-solving abilities, and appreciation for detail. Here are five valuable culinary lessons that can be incorporated into your everyday life.

Mise en Place – The Art of Organization and Preparation

Mise en place, a French term meaning “everything in its place,” is a fundamental principle in professional kitchens. Before cooking begins, chefs ensure all ingredients are prepped, measured, and within reach. This method enhances efficiency, reduces stress, and minimizes mistakes.

How It Applies to Daily Life:

Time Management: Just like in the kitchen, having everything organized in daily activities can save time and effort. Planning your day in advance, setting up work materials before starting a project, or even laying out your clothes the night before can enhance productivity.

Reduced Stress: A well-organized workspace or home environment leads to a smoother workflow and prevents last-minute scrambling.

Better Decision-Making: When all elements are in place, whether it’s preparing for a presentation or tackling a household chore, decision-making becomes clearer and more effective.

By adopting mise en place in everyday routines, you can cultivate a structured approach that enhances efficiency and peace of mind.

Knife Skills – Precision and Safety First

In the culinary world, mastering knife skills is a game-changer. Using the right knife, maintaining sharpness, and employing proper cutting techniques can significantly impact cooking outcomes. Good knife skills enhance speed, precision, and safety.

How It Applies to Daily Life:

Attention to Detail: Whether typing an email, organizing documents, or assembling furniture, precision matters in everything we do.

Safety Awareness: Being mindful of how we handle tools—be it kitchen knives, office supplies, or power tools—ensures efficiency while reducing risks of accidents.

Patience and Practice: Just as mastering knife skills takes practice, honing any new skill—whether learning a language or playing an instrument—requires patience and continuous improvement.

Applying precision and mindfulness in daily activities results in higher efficiency, fewer errors, and a greater appreciation for the tasks at hand.

Balancing Flavors – Finding Harmony in Life

A well-prepared dish achieves balance through the perfect combination of sweetness, sourness, saltiness, bitterness, and umami. Adjusting and balancing flavors is a crucial skill for any cook.

How It Applies to Daily Life:

Work-Life Balance: Just like a well-seasoned dish, maintaining a balance between work and personal life prevents burnout and enhances overall well-being.

Interpersonal Relationships: Effective communication, understanding, and compromise—akin to balancing flavors—are essential in maintaining harmonious relationships.

Financial Stability: Just as too much salt can ruin a dish, overspending can destabilize finances. Learning to manage expenses and savings creates a healthy financial balance.

Striving for balance in all aspects of life fosters harmony, productivity, and personal satisfaction.

Cooking Low and Slow – The Power of Patience

Some of the most flavorful dishes, like stews, braises, and slow-cooked meats, require time. Cooking “low and slow” allows flavors to develop deeply and ingredients to tenderize properly. Rushing through the process often leads to subpar results.

How It Applies to Daily Life:

Personal Growth: Achieving long-term goals, whether career advancement or personal development, requires patience and persistence.

Parenting and Relationships: Just as a slow-cooked meal requires time to reach its peak, strong relationships need nurturing, understanding, and time to flourish.

Career Success: Quick fixes and shortcuts rarely lead to sustainable success. Consistency and gradual progress yield more significant results in the long run.

By practicing patience and allowing things to unfold naturally, we can achieve better outcomes and greater fulfillment.

Creativity in the Kitchen – Thinking Outside the Box

Cooking is both a science and an art. While recipes provide structure, great chefs often think outside the box—experimenting with flavors, improvising ingredients, and creating something unique. Creativity in the kitchen leads to innovation and discovery.

How It Applies to Daily Life:

Problem-Solving: Whether at work or home, thinking creatively helps in finding unique solutions to everyday challenges.

Adaptability: Unexpected situations arise frequently. Just as a cook substitutes ingredients when needed, being adaptable in life enables smoother transitions and better outcomes.

Self-Expression: Just like plating a dish artistically, how we dress, decorate our homes, or present ourselves reflects our personality and creativity.

Embracing creativity and flexibility enriches experiences, fosters innovation, and enhances personal and professional life.

Conclusion

The lessons learned in the kitchen extend far beyond preparing meals. By incorporating mise en place for organization, knife skills for precision, flavor balancing for harmony, slow cooking for patience, and creativity for problem-solving, we can enhance various aspects of our daily lives. Cooking teaches us valuable life skills—discipline, adaptability, and appreciation for the process. Whether in the kitchen or beyond, applying these culinary principles can lead to a more efficient, fulfilling, and balanced life. So, the next time you cook, remember that you’re not just making a meal—you’re honing life skills that can serve you well in many areas.

[taruruchi]

WAR IS OVERRRRRR ‼️‼️‼️‼️

He actually came from login + my musicals playlist was on shuffle and poor unfortunate souls came on right before pulling, the world gave me signs 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ I have 1 gem left to my name but it was all worth it

[sailor-brunette]

Kinda late posting about this,but...the other day,Seven Seas announced that they're licensing the shoujo manga I Want to Escape from Princess Lessons in English print this November!!! It was previously only licensed digitally by J-Novel Club,but now it's getting a print release!!! I really hope and pray this means more digital only licenses will get English print releases in the future! Hoping and praying!

[daydreamreality]

okkkkk i know there's the whole mouth pipetting meme like why did this ever happen but was lab safety really so lax back then that someone would make coffee in lab glassware and then DRINK IT AT THE BENCH WHILE RUNNING AN EXPERIMENT ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

[productiveandfree]

List of Top Best Food Bloggers Destinations That Everyone Will Love in 2025

If you’re a food lover or culinary adventurer, 2025 is your year to snoop out some magical food places that will offer you the mouthwatering experiences of a lifetime. In the case of food bloggers, whether you’re a pro or only a Windows cheese lover, these culinary hotspots will heat up your pallet and expand your travels. Go crazy with this list of must visit food destinations that delivers a perfect dose of culture, flavor, and storytelling content for creators.

1. The Vibrant Street Food Scene

Street food is one of the best ways to experience a city, with culture. Most authentic and memorable dishes you’re likely to find are in bustling markets, food trucks, and roadside vendors. The list is simply endless when it comes to choices of skewers of sizzling goodness or dumplings, savory or sweet, fusion or all out mouthwatering. Top Spots for focusing on iconic street food hubs with a local delight range. Food bloggers can take candid shots that show preparation, post colorful pictures and tell stories of each dish. Therefore, tips for your frequent use of these discount sites like ThingsFromMars, you’ll start to see deals on guided food tours and tastings. 

Connecting with locals would also be perfect in street food scenes. Some of them are passed on through generations and that’s when vendors have unique stories about their recipes. The best way to really love each dish is to sink into the bustling atmosphere and use it as an opportunity to learn about cultural significance. It’s like you’re standing at a food stall with the air carrying the scent of spices and a vendor is getting ready to make their version of said traditional dish. Not only does it taste good, but adds to the uniqueness of your story.

2. Farm to Table Restaurants

In 2025 farmers markets are fully transforming and farm to table is still happening, still using fresh, locally sourced ingredients. Not only is food amazing here, but these restaurants are also working to be sustainable and encourage healthy eating. And, why It's a must for these places rustic appeal makes them quite attractive and narrative worthy. Post recipes influenced by their cuisine or interview cooks on your website. Don't overlook eating deals on savings websites, that may be disadvantages of coupons.

Often working with nearby farms, restaurants guarantee the freshest food. Seeing such sites can also help one understand agricultural methods and the need of sustainability in contemporary eating. Many of these eateries also offer cooking courses or seasonal events, ideal for content creators wishing to include their audience with behind-the-scenes looks.

3. Coastal Fishery Paradise

For those of taste in seafood, coastal cities are a heaven. Fresh catches created with conventional techniques or creative ideas always attract foodies. Highlights on reels add grilled fish, seafood stews, and oysters just shucked. From sunlight patios to fishing boats, it really captures the atmosphere of beachside eating. Moreover, using coupon sites like Emucoupon guarantees you won't miss special seafood events, whether it’s on or off season.

Investigating coastal locations also lets you discover environmentally friendly seafood methods and fishing customs. Engaging local fishermen or visiting fish markets will help your material to be more rich and highlight the trip from ocean to plate. For your blog, picture strolling through a busy market choosing fresh foods and then enjoying a meal with a view of the sea. These events build interesting stories.

4. Worldwide Food Festivals

Food festivals together globally minded chefs, foodies, and culture vultures. These gatherings highlight regional specialties, experimental cuisine, and handcrafted goods. Indeed, expect interactive culinary classes for taste testing stations, and energetic presentations. Bloggers can transport readers on a trip across tastes, customs, and behind the scenes events.

Discovering emerging gastronomic trends is also best done during food festivals and how to use coupons to fully utilize them. Many times, chefs introduce creative ideas or techniques in these venues. These events also offer lots of networking chances with other foodies and business leaders, which makes them quite helpful for bloggers trying to increase their influence and joint projects.

5. Culinary Treasures Hidden

Sometimes the best dining experiences come from unusual directions. Dish rooted in love and history abound in small restaurants, family owned bakeries, and secret cafes. And, why It matters as these locations offer viewers looking for real recommendations and relevant experiences. Tell their wonderful tales and search the internet for common promo codes and deal sites for dinner offers.

Furthermore, often with a devoted local following, hidden treasures reflect the caliber of their services. Talking with the chefs or proprietors will reveal amazing tales on the beginnings of their cuisine. A small bakery might have a special recipe handed down over the years, for instance, which would personalize your blog entries.

6. Dessert Places

Desserts are universally appealing, thus food bloggers love them. Discover visually beautiful and mouth watering delicacies at bakeries, patisseries, and ice cream parlours. A Pro Tip for Photograph vibrant macarons, delicious cakes, and oddball dessert concoctions Instagram worthy. Emphasize special ingredients and combinations.

Dessert sites are also a creative playground. Many businesses try strong tastes and creative presentations, which provide countless ideas for writers. Whether it's a classic dessert with a modern spin or a nitrogen frozen delight, these locations offer plenty of ideas for interesting articles.

7. Dining and Wine Experiences

Match cuisine to the ideal wine to accentuate any meal. Documentable pleasures abound in wine regions from vineyard tours to wine tasting events to fine dining encounters. As sharing ideas for content including vineyard histories, winemaking techniques, and pairings. Using internet tools for various categories discounts might enable one to budget for opulent experiences without going overboard.

Wine and dine events also present chances to explore the science underlying wine manufacture. There is a lot of information to investigate from soil kinds to fermentation techniques. Emphasizing these features will make your material appealing to a larger readership and both instructive and fun.

8. Fusion Cuisine Hot Sites

Fusion cuisine creates something totally fresh by combining the finest of many cooking styles. Bloggers searching for original content and daring foodies can find ideal locations here. Write on creative presentations and strong taste pairings, emphasize the inventiveness of cooks who are brave to combine elements from several cultures.

As a matter of fact, fusion cuisine displays the cosmopolitan character of its beginnings rather often. Investigating these hotspots can help one understand the ways in which several cooking customs interact. A cuisine mixing Asian ingredients with European methods, for instance, can convey a narrative of creative invention and cultural interaction.

9. Workshops and Cooking Classes

One of the best ways to really experience the culture of a place is by learning to prepare their local cuisine. Cooking lessons are quite interesting for readers and provide practical experience. And, why It works to share your cooking adventure from ingredient chopping to final dish plating. Talk about any cost cutting strategies you employed to help your audience book lessons.

Cooking classes can help to increase respect for the work and talent required to produce classic cuisine. Step by step documentation of your experience will encourage others to attempt these dishes, therefore fostering connection and involvement.

10. Vegetarian and Vegan Delights 

Plant based eating is becoming more and more popular globally thanks to imaginative and mouth watering choices now more easily available than before. By highlighting, look at creative cuisine, plant based culinary festivals, and committed vegan eateries. For offering recipes and nutritional analysis, bloggers can appeal to readers who value their health.

The emergence of plant based cuisine has also resulted in an explosion of creative meals satisfying different palates. From cashew based cheesecakes to jackfruit tacos, the combinations are limitless. Emphasizing these choices will draw a large audience including those drawn in by wellness and environmentalism.

11. Cafehopping and Coffee Culture

Coffee drinkers are aware that a decent cafe offers an experience rather than only a place to get a drink. From charming local cafés to third wave coffee shops, the choices are almost unlimited. For reviewing exotic beers, unusual cafe decor, and barista tales from Content Angle. Share links to resources for coffee tours or classes including savings.

Cafe hopping lets you investigate the craftsmanship involved in preparing coffee. There is a lot of material to find from latte art to unusual brewing techniques. Many cafés also serve as community hubs, presenting local artwork or events, therefore augmenting the layers of interest your postings provide.

12. Legendary Fine Dining Restaurants

Their flawless service, artistic presentations, and exclusive menus make luxury dining experiences constantly sought for. For blog tips and for listing chef's specials and document tasting menus and advise utilizing less expensive venues for a more easily accessible experience.

Fine dining restaurants sometimes challenge culinary artistry in scope. Including these experiences will improve your blog and attract readers who value upscale eating. Furthermore, adding a different viewpoint is sharing knowledge on the creative process behind these recipes.

Conclusion

Make 2025 your Year of Culinary Adventures with so many amazing places to discover, 2025 is looking to be a year food bloggers and aficionados will remember most definitely. Every mouthful, from haute dining to street cuisine, tells a tale. Furthermore, there are many ways to save money with time by utilizing sensible tools to make your trips value packed and reasonably affordable. Start organizing your gastronomic trips immediately to satisfy your audience with the most delicious content.

Share in the comments below: Questions go here

[inactiveaccount-lovendeepsecrets]

Domestic + Intimate Headcanons

*Minus Caleb only because his myth and cards aren't out yet, and I don't feel confident adding him when there's so much lore and little quirks we still don't know about him. I shall make a separate post for him if this goes well.

But Hi! This is my 1st hc so please go easy on me. I believe some of the bullet points on here are canon, but I can’t help talking abt how cute this all is 🫠 I'm not the best writer and I tried so hard to be impartial, but you can probably still tell where my bias lies LOL

As always these are just my opinions!!

tags: headcanon, fluff, mostly gender neutral, but these lean towards an afab + fem!reader, 18+

***MDNI; by choosing to interact with this content, you have consented to viewing something nsfw despite the warnings and will be BLOCKED***

Disclaimer: I personally think all of them like praise, body worship and are humungous eaters. If the specifications aren't noted under your fav LI, it's because I didn't want this too become too redundant!

✵ ✰ ✷ ✭✮ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ ❅ ❆ ❃ 𓆰· 𓆃

Rafayel

SFW

• Has definitely set up a date where you do that TikTok trend painting portraits of each other

• Hates the caricature you two posed for at the amusement park

• On more than one occasion you've (jokingly) threatened to frame said caricature at his gallery to shut him up during an argument

• Is an escape artist. He has a long history of being captured/on the run. It’s no wonder he could easily untie himself from your ropes

• I don't think we talk enough about how rich this man is, but I think he'd be quite into second hand fashion. Think runway archives, vintage designer pieces, custom couture, etc.

• Always drives over the speed limit

• Will never tease you during your art lessons with him

• THE best bf to take pictures of you for your social media accounts. He’d suggest different poses while contorting himself in odd positions on the ground just to get the perfect angle

• Sings you to sleep

• Surprisingly good at doing hair. If you need help dying, braiding, or putting your hair in rollers, he'd actually do a pretty good job.

• Created an entire album on his phone of candid photos he took when you weren't looking

• Also made a scrapbook of polaroids from all your scenic dates and vacations together, most of them are of you

NSFW

• He’s a mermaid. He is the motion of the ocean. The hip movements? Stamina? Best (and prettiest) dick game goes to him, I’m sorry.

• LOUD, noisy, and talkative. Starts to ramble when he’s close

• Wax play? [in the submissive]

• Nipple play [in the submissive]

• Edging + Milking

• I think his open vulnerability makes people think he’s more sub leaning, but some of it’s for show

• Because of your bond, he’ll submit; but he’ll do it in such a way that you’re right where he wants you to effectively make the switch

• Make no mistake, he doesn’t mind subbing from time to time. He loves seeing you on top of him, using his body. He feels a sense of accomplishment being a vessel for your pleasure

• There was a tweet that explained how Raf would be a bit of a bully as a dom, but in the best way (recommended read)

• Chuckles and coos at you after each of your orgasms

• Isn’t into watersports, but gets a massive ego boost if you squ*rt

• Is sometimes overly arrogant about toys, but is also so obsessed with you, that he made you get molds of each other on the rare occasions you’re apart for too long

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚

Sylus

SFW

• Has asked his private chef for a one on one culinary lesson to impress you with a home cooked meal

• A patron and secret lover of the arts. Dabbles in the opera, theatre and certain musicals

• He’s*slightly* better at drawing and singing than he lets on, but loves taking the piss

• This man is so funny, but his life and profession is all too serious, making the small moments of banter more precious for the both of you

• Will also hum to lull you to sleep

• Secret polyglot

• His way of ending petty arguments with you is by throwing you over his shoulder and going to bed

• Retail therapy connoisseur

• Surprisingly handy

• He of course, only likes visiting Linkon to see you, but also likes your apartment. While it’s microscopic in his eyes, he slowly understands what small things make a home feel cozy and tries to replicate that at his

• He’s intrigued by your self care sessions and will often indulge, joining in with the sheet masks, aromatherapy, massages and waxing (he likes the heat of the wax lol). He’ll put on a brave face and deny the pain, boasting about his high tolerance

• Spoils you in general, but especially when you’re sick or on your period

• Will carry you around just cause -much like a typical cat owner who loves to randomly pick up and cuddle their cat LOL

• Would buy out a restaurant for the night and have the orchestra play a medley of some of your favourite songs you’ve discovered from his record collection

• There’s really no such thing as small gestures with him

NSFW

• Marking

• Nipple play (giving and receiving)

• Blindfolds

• Certified munch; almost loves it more than penetrative sex

• AND HE 10000% HOLDS YOUR HANDS WHILE GOING DOWN ON YOU— WHY ISNT THIS WRITTEN MORE IN FICS

• Pleasure dom. He’s not sadistic or a bully when it comes to overstimulation (unlike Raf), he’s the very definition of “will talk you through it”

• Absolutely the type to coo at the sounds and faces you make. You could not look more adorable in his eyes

• Likes watching you solo

• Your satisfaction is his priority, so he’s not intimidated by toys. That being said, he definitely owns a remote vibrator

• Phone sex. No question

• In addition to phone sex, he bought those long distance bluetooth couple’s toys that sync up with each other so it’ll react to both of your movements in real time

• In the submissive, he really loves to see you in control of your own pleasure. He’ll encourage you to use him (eg face sitting, leg humping, cowgirl, etc)

• Slight masochist; those cuffs, paddles and chains are for him 😭 he’s curious to see how far you’ll go. By the end of it all, he’ll use his evol to free himself of whatever restraint he’s under

•As far as a degradation kink, I don’t see it for him, sorry. He adores you too much to call his sweetie a “slut”, “whore”, “filthy,” and so on

• Not as rough as he appears. Really the only time he’s rougher than he realises, is when he’s biting you

• If you want it more aggressive, you’ll have to ask. Even then, he’ll be cautious not to overdo it. The last thing he wants is to hurt you

• It’s canon he loves praise. Giving and receiving

𓆰· 𓆃 · 𓆩♡ 𓆰· 𓆃 · 𓆩♡ 𓆰· 𓆃 · 𓆩♡ 𓆰· 𓆃 · 𓆩♡

Xavier

SFW

• Low-key likes to carry you around and his fav way is by piggyback ride (loves being physically close to you and the way you cling to him)

• Will fast all day just for Hotpot or Brazilian steakhouse

• Is much better at baking than cooking

• Leaves you Post-it note love letters in places like mirrors, cabinets, and drawers, before he leaves after spending the night

• Unintentional comedian. He's sometimes taken aback by your laughter, but it only encourages him to keep talking just to hear it again

• He honestly loves sharing things with you; food, books, (his) hoodies, etc. He just doesn’t like sharing YOU

• Would plan a scavenger hunt date

• Is always playing coy because he knows it triggers your cuteness aggression

• The pettiest of petty when he's upset or threatened (look up his affinity lvl 140 video call)

• Sometimes stricter than Zayne when it comes to your health & recovery. He hates to see you over-exerting yourself after an injury and has scolded you before about taking it easy

• Loves to get ready for bed with you at the same time. Showering together, doing skincare together, brushing teeth together; whatever you’re doing he’s either tagging along or sitting there watching you

• When he’s spending the night, he can't fall asleep without you playing with his hair and holding hands

• Learned your favourite flower and has been secretly sneaking into Jeremiah’s greenhouse planting and tending to a small bush of them to gift to you whenever

NSFW

• Thigh job

• Mating press

• Morning sex, specifically morning head (f receiving)

• While going down on you, he def seems like the type to keep going after you’ve climaxed, but he slows down his movements, giving languid kisses to your center to help ride out the wave of pleasure vs intentional overstimulation (though he isn’t against that either)

• It seems that the consensus on here is that he's the best eater of the LIs? I don't necessarily disagree; I'm just not completely sure if that title goes to him quite yet

• The most primal and rough of the LIs. Hair pulling, choking (safely), spanking, leashes

• Also likes it when you’re rough with him

[I know I said I wasn’t confident making any hcs abt Caleb yet, but I have a slight hunch he rivals Xavier for most primal]

• Goes feral when you say his name

• This man is a dom, don’t let the puppy eyes and bunny ears fool you 💀

• He's not as noisy as he is talkative, especially during foreplay

• BOSSY

• I don’t put it past him to feel like he’s in competition with vibrators. He’d rather him use one on you, but knows he’s being irrational

• While he’s not really into feet, he’d suck toes during missionary to see how you’d react

✵ ✰ ✷ ✭ ✧ ✸ ✮ ✵ ✰ ✷ ✭ ✧ ✸ ✮ ✵ ✰ ✷ ✭ ✧ ✸

Zayne

SFW

• Alternatively to Sylus, this man is comprised of small gestures that snowball (hehe) over time. One more meaningful than the next

• While he respects and admires your independence, he needs you to need him. He’ll never vocalise it, but he feels most useful and accomplished when you ask for his help

• Won’t let you carry any bags when you’re out shopping, not even your purse

• Like Rafayel, he also has an album on his phone with pictures of mostly you. Though he feels odd taking your picture when you’re not looking, he’s snuck in a photo or two when you were looking particularly lively mingling with the people at his work event

• Knows your go-to orders at all of your fav restaurants by heart

• Stargazing dates. When either of you are out of town for a while and are catching up on the phone before bed, he’ll tell you to go outside and look at the moon

• After a long shift at work, he’ll kneel by your side of the couch waiting for you to embrace him, hugging and nuzzling your waist

• He also secretly loves being the little spoon

• Subscribed to a delivery service that sends you flowers on your birthday every year

• There’s something about Zayne that makes me think dogs absolutely LOVE him even though he’s not particularly fond of their energetic nature

• Spoils you rotten when you’re on your period. Full princess treatment; plushie heating pads, full body massages, raspberry tea, and hand feeding you snacks. Basically Dr Zayne turns into Nurse Zayne

• He’s more lenient with your cravings, letting you have a small portion of desserts or snacks only after you’ve finished your meal

• Loves your laugh but knows his dry wit won’t always work, so he’ll just tickle you if the joke doesn’t land

• Fell in love with you after the Drunken Intimacy card. It made him realise how much he likes holding you and tending to your needs

• Doesn’t even bother lecturing you about how bad high heels are for your joints and muscles anymore. He now keeps a pair of slippers in his car just in case you start to complain

• He can never resist the urge to kiss your cheek or forehead when he sees you’re fast asleep (Canon 🥹)

NSFW

• Has a weakness for lingerie, lace and stockings

• In the submissive, he’d be just like the kitty butler in his card -the goodest of good boys

• …Feet? I’m not sure if it’s anything freaky. Kudos to whoever clocked that for sub! Zayne months prior to the kitty butler quad banner

• Soft dom, but not as gentle as his voice lets on. He’s already a bit strict with you in your relationship, and he’s the same way in bed. How is he supposed to know what feels good if you don’t vocalise it?

• The only time he’s pretty rough with you is when you provoke him. But he checks in with you to make sure he isn’t being too hard

• Once he loses his control, he gets a tiny bit greedy too (“We’re not done here. Quitting halfway isn’t something I would do” —Silent Poem Secret Times)

• His methods of brat “taming” aren’t anything over the top or domineering. Though he enjoys spanking, he thinks there are better lessons he could teach you to combat your brattiness

• Has definitely gone down on you and stopped altogether right before you climax as a form of punishment

• Shibari + Hitachi -girl run!

• Ice play

• Nipple play (giving and receiving)

• The size of your chest doesn’t really matter to him, he just really likes to hold and massage them. It’s his favourite way to keep his hands warm

• This man is so good with his hands and in more ways than one. The placement and movement of his hands in the Nightly Rendezvous card sent me into orbit. The body worship he’d do is insane

• Needless to say he’s the best at fingering

• You’re irresistible to him. He breathes you into every kiss, deepening as your bodies continue to merge. There’s no sex without passion, even the “quickies”

• Quickies usually only happen when you’ve teased or provoked him too far during (or on your way to) an event. Otherwise, he likes taking his time with you

• He knows your body like the back of his hand. He’s memorised what triggers the sounds, faces, and jolts your body makes

• Much like Xavier, he loves to hear you cry out his name

❅ ❆ ❃ ❊ ❉ ❅ ❆ ❃ ❊ ❉ ❅ ❆ ❃ ❊ ❉ ❅ ❆ ❃ ❊ ❉ ❅ ❆

[wilsonincblog]

Embracing Imperfection: The Tale of the Deflated Soufflé and Unforgettable Memories

Personal cooking journey, Kitchen memories, Culinary tales, Heartwarming recipes, Cooking mishaps, Embracing kitchen fails, Heartfelt food stories, Lessons from the kitchen, Cooking with love, Unforgettable meal experiences,

Daily writing promptWrite about your most epic baking or cooking fail.View all responses In the heart of my home lies the kitchen, a sanctuary where I’ve celebrated successes and faced my fair share of culinary disasters. Today, I want to share a story not of triumph, but of a humbling experience that reminded me of the unpredictable nature of life and the beauty of imperfection. It was one of…

[perfectlyvalid49]

It’s summer and that means the kids are going to camp! Last week the kids were at gymnastics camp at the place they take lessons. This week they’re at kosher culinary camp at the local Chabad.

The difference could not be more stark.

Last week, I drove up outside the front doors for pick up and drop off, shouted their first names through the window of my car, and either received a thumbs up at drop off, or had the kids walk out unaccompanied at pick up.

This week, I had to walk them inside (adults have to present ID to be allowed in the building) and check them in with two separate sets of adults. I had to present ID again (separately from getting into the building) to be allowed to pick them up. If someone who is not their legal guardian is going to pick them up, paperwork needs to be filled out in advance.

Last week, the only people outside the building were a couple of teenagers in orange vests to make sure the littlest of kids got inside the building ok.

This week, the only people outside the building were security guards with walkie talkies on one hip and very obvious pistols on the other.

My kids are signed up for three different Jewish camps this summer. All three of them have sent emails outlining the security measures in place to protect the children. No details, because the more people that know the details, the easier it is for someone with ill intent to discover and subvert them, but I know that there will be armed security personnel at all three camps and they will be coming with on field trips. I know that staff at all three camps have been conducting safety drills in the weeks leading up to camp, and I know that all three camps are partnered with local and federal law enforcement to stay up to date on any threats or recommended security changes.

I have never received information like this from any non-Jewish camp. I have received information like this from every Jewish camp.

This is what Jews are talking about when we say that antisemitism impacts the way we live our lives even when we are not being directly targeted by antisemitism. Summer camps shouldn’t have to hire armed guards to keep kids safe. Going to camp at the JCC should not put you at greater risk for violence than going to camp at the YMCA. Requesting that non-Jews help us live in a world where that’s true is not a ridiculous thing to ask.

And before anyone tries to say “Oh just because you feel like you’re not safe that doesn’t mean you’re actually not safe,” I’d like to point out two things. The first is that the Chabad my kids were at today has received multiple bomb threats in the last couple of years. We feel like we’re not safe because people have made it clear that they would like to attack us. We are, in fact, actually not safe.

And the second is that even if we were actually safe, and all the people out there who were saying that (((Zionist))) institutions should be attacked were just running their mouths and were not going to act on it (disproven by recent (and not recent) violent attacks, but we’ll accept the premise for the sake of argument), isn’t it pretty messed up that antisemitic actions have made Jews feel like this is necessary? Like, if one person in a couple was constantly so verbally threatening to their partner that the partner was 1) fearful for their safety and 2) felt it necessary to reach out to law enforcement, we would rightfully call that abuse. Why can we easily recognize that behavior as being immoral in that scenario, but find it acceptable in the local/national/fucking global treatment of Jews?

[berrryparfait]

‎honey sugar you ! ♡‧₊˚

‪‪♥︎‬ featuring: head chef! sylus x pâtissier! fem!reader

— ༉‧₊ᐟ premise: a record of the highs and lows of your time as a fresh-faced pâtissier under the renowned chef sylus—two unforgettable years marked by burnt sugar, stolen glances, and the kind of lessons that shape both your craft and your heart.

❝ i can name three things that are sweet: honey, sugar, and you! ❞

— ༉‧₊ᐟ tags/cws: restaurant au, fluff and mild angst, sylus is kind of a prick at first, kitchen is a battlefield, enemies-to-lovers, airport trope

— ༉‧₊ᐟ word count: 1.4k

— ♫₊ᐟ soundtrack: 好きな人がいること – jy

✧ a/n: inspired by my all-time favorite j-drama, a girl and three sweethearts (suki na hito ga iru koto), which ignited my love for bossy, sulky, tsundere men <3

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS did not welcome you warmly. He scowled at your ���incompetence” despite not having tried your signature dessert—a lemon meringue tart with a cinnamon-powdered twist—and deemed you unworthy of his mentorship right off the bat. He’s the most powerful person in the kitchen and is set on making sure everyone remembers it, rarely pausing to say “please” and “thank you” and glaring daggers at anyone who makes so much as a minor mistake. It’s stressful, working under a man like him—as if a bomb defusal is in progress and one wrong snip could be life-threatening.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS is a bossy, domineering man. His arrogance truly knows no bounds. All the best ingredients, all the best plate arrangements—everything is “his territory”. He’s got the most experience, after all. Why question him? Besides, he’s physically intimidating, too, towering over you at 6’ 2” and watching your every move with those piercing, ruby eyes. He makes you sweat, that’s for sure. “Coffee bavarois,” he stated plainly when asked about this week’s dessert, no room for debate. You tried to tell him it clashes with the main dish, but he refused to give you the time of day. “You’re new here,” he warned, a sinister edge to his deep voice. “So you do as I say.”

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS is always the last person to leave the restaurant. He stays behind to experiment with new flavors and figure out creative ways to improve the menu, sketching and making notes like his life depends on it. One night, just as you’re about to call it a day, you catch him standing by the counter, a quizzical expression on his face. You hide around the corner and watch him in silence as he frowns at the serving of coffee bavarois before him, doubt—for the very first time since you’ve known him—passing like a shadow over his sharp features. He pulls out a slice of your lemon meringue tart from the fridge (your coworkers ask you to bake one every week), and, gingerly, takes a small bite. His face lights up in sweet surprise, but he quickly schools his expression, as if wary of watchful eyes. “God damn it…” he curses under his breath before scribbling something in his book.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS isn’t used to admitting he was in the wrong. He struggles to hold your gaze as he “suggests” a change in the dessert menu, his perfervid desire for culinary perfection winning out over his pride. You, on the other hand, are trying your hardest to suppress a smug grin of utter satisfaction, the glorious tides of victory flooding your veins. “Yes, chef,” you reply, beaming. Your coworkers watch on nervously as he squints at your tone, the spark of a challenge passing unspoken between the two of you. Just when you think he’s about to lash out, he simply says, brusque as always, “Preheat the oven. Doors are almost open.”

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS has finally begun to acknowledge your level of skill, begrudgingly taking your lead at times and heeding your advice. He rarely questions your decisions anymore; at least when it comes to the dessert menu. Once in a while, though exceedingly rare, you even catch the occasional muttered compliment falling from his lips, and it makes you happier than it should. Part of you wonders if he’s begun to seek your approval just as much as you seek his. Petty competition aside, work has felt a lot lighter, lately. For what might be the first time in an eternity, working in the kitchen feels like working as a team. “That was…not a bad idea,” he says lowly, masking his words with nonchalance. “What was that? I couldn’t hear you— ” you tease, incredibly pleased with yourself.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS gets surprisingly twitchy when met with skin-to-skin contact. He’d been watching you prepare a tray of macarons the other day when you asked if he wanted to try piping the vanilla buttercream filling. Unexpectedly, he turned out to be a novice—fumbling with the bag and making a small mess on the baking tray. You sighed at his meagre attempts and reached out to guide him, your soft palm gentle yet firm on his knuckles as you filled the remaining macarons together. It worked well at first—both of you focused and in sync—but his grip eventually faltered. After a pause, he quietly shook your hand loose and returned to his own preparations, seemingly a little…flustered?

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS celebrates in silence. You’ve just won your first ever major haute cuisine competition as a chef-pâtissier duo, and rather than celebrating with the rest of the restaurant staff, he grabs a beer from the fridge and retreats to the balcony. You join him after a while, believing he deserves to feel proud too. The cool night air hits your face as you walk up to him—he’s hunched over the railing with a pensive, far-off look on his face. “Not having fun?” he asks sardonically. You rally the question back to him, to which he simply says he prefers celebrating in private. Yet…he doesn’t reject your company. In fact, he seems to find a sort of delicate solace in it. He opens up to you for the first time that night, telling you about the pressure he’s dealt with his entire life to live up to his legendary father's legacy. You tell him he’s enough and place your hand on his. Bright color warms his cheeks.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS is patient with you; supportive of you. He’s still as broody and reserved as always, yet you find the other chefs smiling more. They laugh freely during work hours and, as a result, customers seem more satisfied, too. You’ve found a home here, and you’re happy. Imagine everyone’s surprise when you’re notified of a French celebrity chef’s interest in your dessert-making—his offer highly generous. He isn’t exactly more renowned than Sylus, but it would still be an excellent opportunity for you to progress in the culinary scene. It’s not something you can simply…pass up.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS has been distant lately. His mood is easily soured, and he’s regained some of that signature bite when speaking to you. You know he’s just scared. Scared you’ll leave him, scared you’ll forget all about him when you move to Paris, your time together in the kitchen miles away. But he hasn’t discouraged you from going. “Award-winning pâtissiers would kill for an opportunity like this. Take it and go.” he says bluntly, and you’d be lying if you disagreed. So why does the thought of leaving this place behind hurt you so? And why is he acting like this if you’re already on borrowed time?

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS doesn’t bother seeing you off at the airport. You take in a shaky breath as you pull your luggage towards the immigration kiosks, devastated and confused. Did the past two years really mean nothing to him? Just as you step in line, heavy footsteps echo through the departure hall. You turn to see a very breathless, very desperate Sylus—still in his once-pristine chef’s uniform—staring right at you. He ran all the way here to stop you. To get something off his chest… “I’m not here to keep you from leaving,” he breathes, nothing but sincerity in those intense, crimson eyes. “That’d be selfish of me. I’m here to say goodbye. And…” Your heart squeezes as he cups the side of your face and leans in, planting a tender kiss on your lips. Hot tears threaten to spill down your cheeks as you tell him you love him, that you’ll never forget him, and that you’ll be back after chasing your dreams.

HEAD CHEF! SYLUS visits you every month, his warm embrace and playful kisses a welcome remedy for the cold, Parisian weather. You’ve barely been in France a year, and you already wish you could go back. Maybe next year, once you’ve finished perfecting this year’s dessert menu. You’ve always believed in expanding your horizons and chasing your dreams, but though they’re always evolving, always growing, in many ways…you already have. Because sometimes, a dream isn’t some far-off future—it’s the life you’re living. And for you, Sylus waits at the end of every chapter.

— ⋆˙⟡ ©berrryparfait

《 please do not copy / plagiarize / translate my works or publish them on any other platforms. 》

[anya-nya-nya]

light NSFW, GN!reader, yandere! Vil, poisoning

The cake Vil cooked as a way to show off himself and his ideal skills that apply to all types of activities was so well done you can't help but answer with awe when he asked your opinion.

“Woah, Vil, it looks so perfect it feels bad to try it..”

Was it a joke or your way to compliment - Vil still didn't understand, but either way words struck him more than he wanted to admit.

He kinda understands the point - when you put something on a pedestal you can only admire it with your eyes, not with touch. But in his worldview perfection wasn't just a stable point on the path, it was a concept that gained new heights and requirements every time he steps closer. If you already talk like this, what will you say after a year or two when he will bake something even better? That you can't even look at his cooking anymore?

Also, Vil is a human and not a cake but he still applies your thinking on him too, unintentionally. Surely you didn't see him the same way - too perfect to even try shooting your shot? Though now it perfectly explains why you're so oblivious to his attention, being sure it's the same treatment he shows to students of Pomefiore.

“I insist you try it, dear. You can't judge the thing about how good or bad it is without looking inside, don't you?” — A simple answer in his usual sweet teasing manner, nothing to raise suspicion to. So despite your previous adoration you accepted a slice of cake with the same reaction you always show to any of his present - a nice smile of pure naivety.

“Well, when you turn it this way, then I can't disagree with you..” — Your lips stretched further after a few spoons. — “Mm! Now I'm even more sure it's really yummy! Though I can feel some bitterness.. Is it the dough? Maybe you leave it in the oven for a bit too long?”

“Oh, a shame. Let me see..” — Fingertips of his nimble fingers brushed against your palm as Vil took the plate back. — “See? Sometimes even things you find perfect could be not that good.”

“It's so strange to see THE Vil Schoenheit making a mistake.. But you know, it makes me feel less awkward when it would be my turn to cook..” — The softness in your eyes didn't disappear but got even brighter.

“My culinary lessons turned out to be a failure but at least you learned to always give a chance even to..”

The end of his speech petered out from your mind - or maybe Vil just stopped coaxing you with mumbling the moment he noted that dizzy look in your half-lidded eyes. Either way, the touch of his hands on your waist to prevent fall registered only physically, never reaching the already unconscious mind.

What a shame. Vil made a mistake by adding too little of the flavor and you did notice the bitterness of yet another poison he slipped in. Another thing he needs to work on after he takes his time is perfecting his memory about the shape of your body and the most sensitive spots under all that clothes.

As his fingers slid to undo buttons of your shirt Vil still couldn't shake the thoughts away. If the bitterness of vile filling let you see him more humanly, than maybe when you saw the same dirt underneath the perfect image of the Vil Schoenheit, you wouldn't get as disgusted as he afraid you would be.. Maybe next time he shouldn't be limited with poison, actually showing you that disgusting imperfection he left in his soul just for you.

[covenofagatha]

author, can you make agatha x reader, where agatha as the head chef at the high-end restaurant and us reader as the new worker in the kitchen?

Another one from November finally done 😅 also thank you so much for the picture GOD she looks good as a chef

I have also never worked in a restaurant and I know absolutely nothing about cooking/the culinary world so I apologize for any inaccuracies just roll with it lol

Under her knife

You finally get the job of your dreams working at Agatha Harkness's restaurant

Word count: 3.9k

Warnings: spanking, fingering, Agatha is a mean boss, slight dub-con, praise kink, manipulative chef!Agatha

Taglist: @lostbutlovely33 @diorrxckstar @whoreforolderfictionalwomen  @katekathry @onemansdreamisanothermansdeath @tayasmellsapples @natashashill @mybraininblood @mysticalmoonlight7  @cactuslover2600 @loveem0mo @readysteddiero-nance @lonelyhalfwitch @lesbiantortilla @crescendoofstars @sol-in-wonderland @ahsfan05 @gbab09 @sasheemo @agathaharness @live-laugh-love-lupone @chiar4anna @fuckedupforkhahn @lowlyjelly

It was a dream come true when you got the call that you were hired at Agatha Harkness’s restaurant, Nicky’s Steakhouse. 

She was a celebrity in the food world and getting an audience with her was near impossible. 

As luck would have it, she came into one of your classes at The Culinary Institute of America a few days before your graduation for a demonstration on how to make gateau saint honoré, a French pastry dessert and one of the most difficult to make. 

She had asked a question and you were the only one out of fifty students who raised your hand. Your voice shook as you answered and she looked surprised when you said the right thing. 

Throughout the rest of the assembly of the ingredients, she kept looking over at you, like she was making sure you were paying attention. After the lesson, she asked to speak with you in private. You had never been so nervous in your life and you would never forget the way her blue eyes burned into yours when she told you that she saw something special and wanted you to come in for an interview. 

At the high-end restaurant that she owned. 

Just because you answered a question correctly. 

But you were disappointed when you went in for it and you were met with just the sous-chef. Part of you hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Agatha and was hoping you’d get to see her again.  

She asked you questions, both about your experience and school, and how to make specific dishes. And then she put you in the kitchen and told you to make lobster thermidor. 

She watched you intensely the whole time and when you were done, she took one bite and told you that you would find out within the next week. 

A day later, you got a call from Agatha herself, who told you that she wanted you on board and that you start in a week. 

And the day is finally here.

The first day of the rest of your life. You take a deep breath in your car and count to ten to calm your nerves. Your stomach is twisting in knots and you’re not sure you’ve ever been more anxious in your life. 

But you’ve got this. 

You were put on the evening shift and the moment you walk through the door, your nose is hit with the most delicious of smells. The restaurant is packed, like you’ve heard it is every night. 

You’ve never actually eaten here before; it costs an arm and a leg and culinary school wasn’t cheap. 

Winding through the tables to the kitchen, you catch sight of some of the most delectable food you’ve ever seen and your mouth waters. 

You give yourself a tiny pinch just to make sure you aren’t dreaming, but it stings. This is real. This is happening. 

The kitchen door swings open and you’re immediately almost knocked to the ground by three waitresses bustling out of the kitchen, carrying steaming bowls of pasta and platters of meat and towers of croquembouche. You jump out of the way, muttering a quick “Sorry” before carefully entering and staying close to the wall as you look around for Agatha. 

It doesn’t take you long to see her, or rather, hear her. 

“Are you incompetent?” Her voice rings out over the clambering of pots and pans and line cooks shouting to each other and you see Agatha Harkness on the other side of the kitchen glowering over a cowering man, a waiter by the way he’s dressed. Her white uniform is form-fitting and her dark hair is neatly tucked in a bun under her chef toque, her blue eyes filled with a dangerous heat. She’s wearing little gold hoop earrings and her lips are painted slightly pink.

The man standing in front of her visibly trembles. Fear twists in your stomach even though you’re not the one in trouble. What did he do? “Chef Harkness, I’m sorry,” he stammers but she slams her hand down on the countertop to shut him up. 

“Oh, you’re sorry?” She scoffs and holds up a fork. The man gulps. “What kind of fork is this?” 

“A salad fork,” he answers immediately. 

Agatha drops the fork and it clangs on the floor. “So then why,” she hisses, leaning in closer, and you can feel the fear radiating off the man, “did you put it on the right side of the dinner fork in the corner booth? Did you forget that salad forks go on the left?” 

He shakes his head furiously. “It was a mistake, I’m sorry!” 

“I don’t have time for mistakes. Get out of my kitchen. You’re fired,” she barks and your jaw drops. 

What have you gotten yourself into? You didn’t realize how ruthless Agatha was going to be. What if you mess up tonight? 

Will she fire you just as quickly? 

The man, to his credit, doesn’t put up a fight. He takes off his name tag vest and hands it to her before stalking out of the kitchen, brushing past you on his way out. No one else has even looked up from what they’re doing. Is this just a standard routine?

You swallow roughly and turn back to Agatha and find, with a jolt, that she’s already looking at you, a throbbing vein prominent in her forehead. 

She beckons you forward, and as if in a trance, you make your way over to her, stopping every now and then to let someone with food slide past you. 

“There she is,” Agatha says when you get to her and she studies you like she’s judging if you know where a salad fork should go. 

You offer a shaky smile. “Hi, Chef Harkness, I just want to say thank you so much for this opportunity and I’m going to do my best with every single meal. I promise I won’t let you down.” 

Agatha snorts and thrusts the fired man’s name tag and vest into your hands. “Easy there, y/n,” and a thrill runs through you at her knowing your name, “Your uniform is in the backroom. Put it on and get to work.” 

Nodding, it becomes clear to you that she doesn’t want to talk anymore, so you rush back and find a double-breasted coat, checkered pants, apron, and toque neatly folded on a bench with your name printed on them. The uniform fits you perfectly which you’re a little surprised about. 

You’re not exactly sure what to do with the fired man’s stuff, so you just leave it there. 

Even though you’re a bit weary from the display you just saw, you can’t help but feel incredibly excited that you’re actually here. You have worked so hard, spent so many hours pouring over recipe books, gotten so many burns on your skin from boiling water, cried over dishes that didn’t turn out well no matter how hard you tried — it finally paid off. 

Emotion rushes through you but you tamp it down with a deep breath. You need to focus. You need to be at the top of your game and show Agatha that you do deserve to be here. 

It starts out easy enough. Roast prime rib au jus. Grilled yellowfin ahi. French onion soup. 

Every so often, Agatha comes over and stands over your shoulder, close enough that you can feel her hot breath on your neck. It gives you goosebumps and you have to remind yourself to keep working. 

“Good girl,” she says into your ear after you put a plate down of lobster bisque and that particularly makes a shiver run through you. 

You find yourself getting a little distracted after that, your eyes following her across the kitchen wherever she goes and hoping that she comes back over to give you some more praise. 

Agatha yells at someone else for using too much salt on a dish, dumping it off the plate into the trash and demanding the cook make a new plate, and you duck your head down when she looks over at you so she doesn’t see you watching. Too late.

You can almost feel her coming over to you, dread filling in your stomach as you wait. Is she going to get mad at you for not minding your own business? Everyone else here has seemed to learn how to. 

Her front brushes against your back. “You seem a little on edge,” she murmurs and your heart skips a beat. “Don’t worry, hon. I won’t punish you — unless you deserve it.” 

It makes your cheeks heat up and your hand shakes just as you’re carefully scooping a teaspoon of garlic salt out of the container. The spoonful drops onto the counter and Agatha chuckles from behind you before reaching around and swiping it onto the floor, effectively getting rid of the mess from your workspace. 

If it was anyone else, would she have gotten mad? Maybe she’s just taking it easy on you because it’s your first day. 

“No harm done,” she remarks and then she’s gone and you let out a deep breath you didn’t know you were holding. 

It’s almost fascinating to watch her work, to watch her sweep through the kitchen and check out everyone’s dishes, sprinkling in some advice and ingredients every now and then. She doesn’t hesitate to make someone redo something because it’s not good enough, but it surprises you that no one complains. If anything, they agree. 

You suppose that’s the sign of a good Head Chef. They make you better. And when you’re blending all the ingredients of butternut squash soup together and Agatha comes over and wraps her arms around you, her hands on top of yours, to show you how to more effectively stir, you really do feel like you’ve learned something. 

“She’s being really nice to you,” one of the other line cooks says while you’re both waiting for new orders to come in. 

You shrug. “It’s my first day. Guess she’s just showing me the ropes.” The cook doesn’t look convinced, but there’s no time to think about it as you have to start making stuffed gnocchi. 

The next few hours pass quickly. You barely have a chance to think as you’re running back and forth, grabbing things and throwing them into a pan and making sure they’re perfect. You’ve worked up a sweat and you find a few seconds to wipe the beads from your brow before you’re back to work. 

But as the night stretches on, the orders come in less frequently as the rush dies down and soon you only have about twenty minutes left. Your final dish of the night is a raspberry walnut torte. 

Because it’s almost closing time, about half of the cooks finished their shifts a while ago so it’s an intimate setting, just you, Agatha, and four others, everyone quietly moving around and trying to finish up the food they have left. You are absolutely exhausted and you cannot wait to go back to your apartment. 

You’ve just finished your dessert and placed it on the rack at the window, finally feeling like you can relax. 

And then Agatha’s voice cuts through the relative silence. “Who just made this torte?”

Your stomach drops and you sheepishly raise your hand. What did you do wrong?

She grabs a fork and pokes the slice and the center sinks down almost in slow motion. Fuck. “What temperature did you cook it at?” She asks and you think you could just combust with embarrassment on the spot. 

“Three-sixty,” you rasp, and the moment you say it out loud, you realize your mistake. Tortes should be cooked at three-hundred and fifty degrees, and if they’re cooked too hot, the outside of it cooks faster than the inside. 

Leading to a cracked or sunken torte. 

“Chef, I’m sorry, it was a mistake,” you plead, panic and terror spiking through your blood. You were doing so good — now she was certainly going to fire you. 

Agatha sighs, closes her eyes, and pinches her nose like she’s trying to decide what to do with you. When she opens them, the steely blue frightens you. “Make another one,” she says. 

Your mouth drops open. “But it won’t be done in time,” you protest and she smirks. 

“I know. I’m going to go out there and tell them that there was a mishap and that we won’t be able to get them their raspberry walnut torte that they were so looking forward to,” she says and it makes you feel even worse. “It won’t be pretty. You’ve just lost yourself and your fellow line cooks their tip. So the least you could do is show me that you do in fact know how to make a torte and that I shouldn’t fire you on the spot right now.” 

She storms out of the kitchen and you make a tremendous effort to not look at any of the other cooks while you go back to your station and pull out the ingredients to make it again. 

By the time Agatha comes back into the kitchen, it’s time for everyone else to go home. Shame burns your cheeks as they leave without saying goodbye to you and Agatha quietly sits on a stool and watches you work to finish the torte. 

When you pull it out of the freezer where it’s been cooling for a few minutes, you feel like you could pass out on the kitchen floor right there. 

Agatha pokes it with a fork again and you almost sob with relief when it doesn’t crack or sink. But it’s not over yet. 

She takes her first bite and chews thoughtfully like she’s tasting for every single ingredient. “Adequate,” she says after she swallows. “But you’re still fired.” 

“What?” You gasp, your heart skipping a beat. “No, please, Chef, it was an accident, I can make it, look!” 

Agatha puts her fork down. “You fixed it this time. But how can I be sure it won’t happen again?” 

“I promise, please — I’ll do anything,” you say desperately. “I’ll be careful, I won’t mess up again!” 

Her perfectly shaped eyebrow raises and a slow smirk spreads over face. “Anything?” She asks. 

You nod earnestly. “Anything!” 

Agatha stands up so quickly it makes you step back from where you’ve been standing next to her. She cups your cheek and then slides her hand down to tap under your chin. “How about…” she muses, eyes looking you up and down. She looks hungry. “I give you ten spanks.” 

“What?” Did you hear her wrong? Is she joking? She doesn’t look like she is. 

“One spank for each degree hotter you cooked the torte at. It’s the only way you’ll learn,” she explains like it’s the most logical thing in the world. “Bend over on the counter.” 

Despite the sheer insanity at it, a heat rushes through your body. You wanted her attention earlier, didn’t you? 

Seems like you have it now. 

So you try to slow your racing heart and obey. Your forearms rest on the cool metal from where you pushed your sleeves up to work earlier and your head slightly hangs downward, waiting. There’s a little voice in the back of your head that says this is wrong, but you shut it down. You can’t get fired. 

She unties the apron and lets it fall to the floor at your feet and you let out a small gasp. 

“I’m a little disappointed in you, to be honest, hon,” she says as she pushes up your coat. It tears at your heart a little. “But I know that you’re going to make up for it. You’re about to take your punishment like a good girl and show me that you’re really committed to being here. Isn’t that right?” 

You nod and try to ignore the burning in your stomach. What is she doing to you? “Yes, Chef,” you answer hoarsely and let out a little whimper when she yanks down your pants. You curse yourself for deciding to wear a purple thong. “What—” 

“Shh,” she says and rubs your now-bare ass. You hate that you can feel your underwear sticking to you. Can she see it? “Count for me.” 

And then she spanks you and it makes you jump. For some reason, you thought she’d at least ease into it a little, but the impact reverberates through you and makes you gasp. 

“One,” you breathe and she chuckles. 

The next three follow in quick succession, with Agatha waiting only long enough to hear you count. 

After the fifth one, you’re squirming, head resting on your forearms to hide your tears, but the sting has ebbed into pleasure. You’re getting off on this. 

And when Agatha makes a surprised sound and cups your pussy through your underwear, making your hips rock forward instinctively, you know that she knows. Her hand disappears quickly and you let out a little whine. 

“All the best chefs like a little pain,” she remarks conversationally, spanking you again. You gasp out a “six” and she keeps talking. “It’s the only way to get better. To strive for greatness is to accept that it will hurt. I see your potential, I see how good you can be. Just keep working with me, honey, and I’ll get you there.” 

She spanks you again but you can hardly feel it with the fuzziness that has crept into your mind at her words. Agatha Harkness, the best chef in the world, believes in you. 

“Seven,” you remember to say after a moment and she tuts in your ear. 

Agatha soothes the red skin and you relax for a moment before she slaps your ass again. “You’re doing so well for well, honey. Keep going to these lengths to impress me and rectify your mistakes and you could be my sous-chef in no time.” 

The promise makes your head spin. “Eight,” you count when she slaps you again. 

“Such a good girl,” she coos and you are aching. You need her to touch you more than anything. 

Never in a million years did you imagine your first day would look like this. 

She spanks you again. “Nine,” you croak, the feeling spreading throughout your body almost unbearable. 

“Last one. And then I think you deserve a reward,” she purrs and slaps both your asscheeks at the same time, making you yelp. 

Agatha gives you a moment to recover before pulling you up by your coat collar and turning you around and you gasp at how flushed she is. Her cheeks have a red tint to them, her bottom lip swollen — she must’ve been biting it — and her eyes have a heat that you saw earlier, when she fired the waiter. 

But this is a different heat. 

You’re sure you look the exact same. 

She steps even closer to you and slides a hand into your underwear, making your jaw drop. 

“God, you’re wet,” she taunts and you can’t even argue. She wastes no time shoving a finger into you and rubbing at your clit with her thumb and your arms wind around her shoulders for leverage.

“So I’m not fired?” You ask, and obviously there were a million other times that would’ve been better for that question, but it seems fitting. 

Agatha laughs breathless and fits a second finger into you, making you moan. “You’re not fired, honey. We’re going to do great things together. Knew it the moment I saw you.” She curls her fingers roughly and you keen, tightening your grip around her. Your walls spasm around her and try to draw her in. 

Her fingers feel absolutely delicious inside you, filling you just the way you needed to, and you can already feel the tension building in your lower stomach. The spanking got you close, her praise got you closer, and now the great hands of Chef Agatha Harkness are going to finish you off. 

Your head falls back when she scissors her fingers, stretching you out and you hiss at the burn, and she chuckles while she takes in your thoroughly ruined state. 

“What temperature do you cook a torte at?” She asks and you almost don’t hear it over the wet sounds coming from your pussy every time she thrusts inside you. 

It takes you a moment to answer, but when you at last moan out “Three-fifty,” she smirks and bends down to nip at your neck over your collar. You tilt your head to the side to give her more access and she takes it all. She flicks her tongue against your clavicle and sucks, pulling another moan from your mouth. 

You’re so close, the pleasure almost overwhelming, and your breathing has gotten faster, your heart rate through the roof. 

The kitchen has been where you’ve felt most alive your whole life, nothing better than creating something from scratch and carefully curating it to make it into something new — is that what Agatha is doing with you? She plucked you out of your classmates from culinary school, gave a freshly graduated chef a job at her high end restaurant, turned up the heat, and is promising that under her, you’ll turn into a great chef. 

Agatha twists her fingers and you moan, babbling something incoherently, and she rubs your clit harder. 

“Cum for me,” she growls into your ear and thrusts her fingers inside you as far as they can go and you do — a whine falling from your lips as your pussy walls clench uncontrollably around her, tension exploding through your body. 

She keeps fucking you through your orgasm and doesn’t stop until your breathing has evened out and you start to squirm away because of how sensitive you’ve become. And yet, you still whine when she pulls her fingers out of you. 

Agatha lifts her fingers to her mouth and sucks on them, holding eye contact and moaning like she’s a world-class chef and you’re still the best thing she’s ever tasted. 

You awkwardly adjust your underwear, pull up your pants, and clear your throat. Should you thank her for the fact that you still have a job? Or that she just fingered you in her restaurant? 

“Well, guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” Agatha says before you try to break the silence. “You’re not going to make any more mistakes?” Her tone is teasing — you smile and shake your head.

“No, I promise.” Your voice is still a little raspy and it makes her smirk.

She grabs her purse and wraps an arm around your shoulders to lead you out of the kitchen and to the entrance of the restaurant. Her head tilts down and her forehead presses against your temple. “Good, cause I’d hate to have to punish you again.” Except Agatha doesn’t sound like she means that at all and it sears through you. 

At least it seems like you have a little bit of job security, even though you don’t want to mess up any more. You’re going to prove to Agatha that you do deserve this job, that you can be as good of a chef as she thinks you can be. 

She stops at the bottom of the stairs at the entrance and takes her arm around you, immediately missing the warmth it brought you. 

“Good first day, honey,” she says with a wink and it makes your cheeks heat up. 

And then she’s walking away and you stumble to your car while trying to figure out what the hell you just got yourself into. 

[csuitebitches]

Crafting a Personality and Capitalising on it

How do we craft a personality that is socially charming yet true to our roots?

How do we mingle and meet new people without feeling awkward or shy about it?

How do we not lose ourselves while following all these blah blah etiquette rules?

Welcome to part 2 of my Chic Girl Mentality series. 🤍

Today, we will focus on crafting a personality that is still you but better.

First, let’s talk about people in social settings. You’ll meet people who are confident, secure and socially charming. You’ll meet quiet people who may be equally socially charming or just very shy and conscious. You’ll meet the braggers and the doe-eyed followers. There’s a lot of different types of people in the world and knowing how to gracefully navigate most of them is nothing but a learned art.

People, regardless of their bank balance, are insecure of what they do not have yet. This can be looks, money, experience, lifestyle, and so on. How do we capitalise on this without exploiting or manipulating anyone?

By knowing how to tell a story.

That doesn’t mean that you need to become a public speaker or politician, it just means that you need to be able to craft intriguing stories about yourself, using your own life and experiences, to “sell” an interesting version of you socially. We’re all interesting people but only a few of us know how to say that we’re interesting without saying that we’re interesting.

Experience 

People, even those with money, will always be more attracted to those who have experiences, especially, unique ones. Whether it’s travelling to exotic locations or trying new culinary destinations, or wearing unknown designers, knowing obscure artists or writers, or being at the top of your industry… experience is the most important thing to cultivate first.  You already have experience. If you went to school, high school, college, joined clubs, your first job, any travelling, etc - these are all experiences.

Make a list of 5 of the most interesting experiences you think you have.

Hobbies and interests 

Have a couple of lowkey hobbies that you feel enthusiastic about. Whether it’s doing some charity work on Sundays, or cooking, or pottery, whatever it is, keeping a hobby is healthy. 

There should be something to you that an acquaintance can remark about: “CSB? Oh yes, I’ve heard that she’s a great dancer.” 

Vulnerabilities 

Certain vulnerabilities must never, ever be shared. It will 100% be used either as gossip or blackmail. 

However, coming across as someone with no weaknesses is rather untrustworthy- it makes the other person feel that you’re clearly hiding something. 

Make a list of vulnerabilities that are small and you don’t mind sharing. These should be vulnerabilities that will never ruin your reputation in any form but can be used as a form of bonding with empathy. 

And make a list of hard core vulnerabilities you know you should never share with anyone. Keep it memorised rather than written down. 

Experience + Hobbies or Interests + Safe Vulnerabilities = Personality

Storytelling 

Now that you have some experience, hobbies, interests, and your “safe” vulnerabilities sorted even if it’s limited - what will make it stand out is the art of storytelling. Some storytellers can make even the most mundane experiences sound magical - it’s all in the words and delivery. There’s a reason why every Holy Book is a story, packed with lessons and morals - it’s impactful, easy to remember and recall and relatable. Craft your experiences into stories. Use those 5 experiences that you noted down and start writing them down as stories.

Take up an online storytelling class or watch videos. Start honing this skill by writing and reading good literature. 

Refine your 5 experiences further. Run it through chatGPT, say them out loud and most importantly- start testing them out on people. See what makes them chuckle and what doesn’t; what makes them empathise and what doesn’t.

A famous comedian whose name I can’t remember does the same thing. He creates his set. He goes to a small pub and tries it out on the audience there. And the first set is always the first. The audience may not laugh at his jokes, they might boo him or sometimes, he might get a laugh out of them. But every time, he goes home and refines his set further. Once his set is fully refined, and he accomplishes his goal of the audience peeling with laughter at every joke, that’s when he goes on national TV / on tour etc etc.

The most important thing is to craft your stories of your experiences in a way that it delivers the value you want the person to remember about you.

For instance, if I want to be seen as creative and innovative, I won’t tell the person in front of me, “oh, I’m soo innovative and creative!”

Rather I will weave that into a story. “When I was 24, at my first job in the advertising space, we were losing clients left and right. And one weekend, I was on a trek on the mountains - it’s one of my hobbies - this idea hit me, and I suddenly knew exactly how to get our clients back. My team was hesitant about my idea, and we got a lot of pushback, but we went ahead. The night before my launch I was so nervous, I got hardly sleep. And you won’t believe it, but the idea worked! The response was fantastic.”

Let the other person come to the conclusion of you being innovative and creative. Human beings love to deduce things and jump to conclusions and provided you set the context the right way, you should be able to project the version of you that is the best part of you.

Vocabulary 

A sign of a good education- even if you don’t have it - is a diverse vocabulary. I’ve always had a little more respect and awe for those who are articulate, can speak smoothly and speak confidently. I’ve noticed that my American friends, for instance, tend to talk fast with lots of filler words, and sentences tend to end with a pitch up instead of down, which to me indicates hesitation or indecision. Speaking slower, ending your sentences with pitch going down to indicate a full stop rather than up makes you seem like a refined speaker even if your subject is utterly stupid. 

Body language and mannerisms, social interaction 

Watch old classic Hollywood movies to really understand this - especially romantic ones. Choose ones with a femme fatale or siren-like female lead, and watch how she enraptures the male lead or the audience around her. 

A combination of fantastic storytelling and body language will take you places beyond your dreams. Some of the biggest frauds, scammers, politicians, criminals are also some of the best storytellers. Humans are attracted to stories, we pick up body language intuitively, we can sense when someone is nervous or isn’t. Unfortunately the world isn’t a kind place and will not necessarily help you out of your shyness- in fact, that might just make you the best target for exploitation. 

Storytelling + Vocabulary + Body Language = Your Best Personality

[22ayla21]

Sweet Mischief

A little bit of mischief between father and daughter landed him in trouble with his beloved wife.

Years flew by like petals carried on a spring breeze, leaving behind only tenderness and fragrance. She and Hugo, whose fates had once intertwined so intricately under a veil of mystery and danger, were now husband and wife. Their home was filled not only with the scent of freshly cut flowers, which she still adored, but also with cozy warmth, laughter, and, of course, the sweet aroma of baked goods. For they had a daughter—a little princess with her mother's eyes and her father's golden mane of hair. They named her Serena—in memory of the one who had once been Hugo's only light in impenetrable darkness.

For Hugo, Serena was the center of his world, his little universe. He cherished her madly, protected her from any troubles, and was ready to move mountains for her smile. In her, he saw the continuation of all the best in his life, the embodiment of that pure kindness that had once drawn him to his wife. And, of course, he couldn't miss the opportunity to pass on some of his unique "skills" to his precious little one.

One of Hugo and Serena's favorite rituals became "Operation 'Cookie'." His wife, knowing his struggle with sweets, tried to bake things that their daughter would like but that wouldn't cause Hugo cravings or aversion. Usually, it was delicate fruit-filled cookies or light biscuits. And so, when the woman, having finished her culinary masterpieces, went to another room for her own affairs, the real fun began.

Hugo, with a cunning glint in his multicolored eyes, took Serena's hand and whispered his lesson.

"See, princess? Mama's distracted," he dramatically whispered, putting a finger to his lips. Serena, her eyes gleaming with anticipation, nodded, mimicking his serious expression. "A true phantom thief must be as inconspicuous as a shadow and as fast as lightning. First, reconnaissance."

He carefully stretched his neck, peeking around the corner as if surveying an impregnable fortress. Serena, imitating him, also tried to peek, but due to her small height, she could only see the wall. Hugo suppressed a chuckle.

"Now—under cover. Crawl, my little accomplice, crawl!" He got down on all fours, and Serena happily crawled after him, giggling. Their path led through the living room, past sofas and coffee tables where books and vases of flowers usually lay.

Upon reaching the kitchen, Hugo again put a finger to his lips. "There it is, the treasure!" His gaze fell upon the plate of cookies on the table. "The main thing is to act silently. Carefully, like this."

He demonstrated how to silently climb onto a chair and how to gently take one cookie without disturbing the others, and how to just as discreetly put everything back in its place. Serena, with her tiny hands, repeated his every move, and her face glowed with pride when she managed to snatch her own cookie.

"Well done, my little Mockingbird!" Hugo whispered, winking proudly. They were about to retreat with their bounty when a soft but firm voice came from around the corner:

"At it again, my dear little thieves?"

Hugo and Serena froze, caught off guard. The mother of the family stood in the doorway, arms crossed over her chest, that familiar cunning smile playing on her lips. There was no trace of annoyance on her face, only endless love and tenderness.

Serena, caught red-handed, quickly hid the cookie behind her back, but the crumbs on her cheeks and her satisfied smile gave her away completely. The woman shook her head, walked over to her daughter, and gently took her hand.

"Let's see what you're hiding there, my little bandit?" She gently tickled Serena, who, with a squeal of delight, handed her the cookie, which immediately melted in her mouth.

"And you, my dear?" His wife turned to her husband, whose eyes were now full of guilty but charming pleading. "I don't seem to see you with a cookie in your hands. But the plan was yours, wasn't it?"

Hugo put on the most innocent face he could manage. "I was merely teaching our daughter important life skills, my dear. Knowledge is power, you know."

"I know, I know," his wife smiled. "And for those very 'important life skills,' you're going without kisses until the end of the day."

Hugo's eyes widened in horror. This was the harshest punishment his wife could devise for him. The absence of her tender touches and kisses was more terrifying to him than any prison sentence.

"But, my dove! That's... that's cruel!" he exclaimed, trying to embrace her, but she deftly dodged him.

"Not this time, my dear Mockingbird," she replied with a smile, heading towards Serena to wipe the crumbs from her cheeks. "And you, my little princess, can have another cookie if you promise to share with Mama."

Serena nodded happily, while Hugo, sighing resignedly, watched this idyllic scene. He, the phantom thief, the leader of the "Mockingbirds," a man who could steal anything from anyone, was utterly powerless before his wife and daughter. And in this powerlessness, in this unconditional love, he found his greatest happiness. For despite all the complexities of his past, all the wounds he carried within him, his life was now full of light, warmth, and sweet, though forbidden, moments shared with his family. And he knew that for them, he was ready for anything—even to go without kisses until evening.

[toga-003]

⋆⁺₊COLD AS ICE❅*:｡

ʚ summary: you have joined sukuna's side with uraume because you were strong and useful enough to keep around, sukuna mostly ignored you, but uraume seems to be taking a liking to you...

ʚ warnings: slight mature & sexual themes - female reader - gn uraume - unprotected sex - dirty talk - language - violence - sharp uraume behaviour - sub/dom mentions - smut and fluff :3

ʚ prior: due to the results of the second jjk underrated character poll here's the winner:

❆ URAUME you had recently joined sukuna's side since you knew standing anywhere in sukuna's path was a free ticket to death row, and you weren't stupid enough to test that theory. it took a lot of to prove yourself worthy of living remotely close to his side, but you were indeed a strong sorcerer and who knew what else you might be useful at. you were doing quite good at your first weeks working under sukuna so much that you managed to gain a little bit of the king of curses trust, well not even close to a quarter of the trust he has for uraume, but who knows for how long they have been serving for. as long as gain a few acts of fondness coming from uraume that eased your nervousness, knowing that you're welcome by them. you made your way to the kitchen of sukuna's temple at uraume's request, as soon as you step into the kitchen you're met with the gory sight of a few human bodies, The pressure is on as you stare down at the human torso in front of you. You've been exposed to so much gore that seeing it doesn't impact you too much. You can feel Uraume looking at you expectingly. They hold the knife in their hand, choping every limb off the dead bodies effortlessly as though they're quickly getting the task at hand done. teaching you to cook for Lord Sukuna does cut into their other chores that they deem more important, but it might be worth it when you finally learn how to cook sukuna's meals.

"I'm going to be teaching you how to prepare lord sukuna's food, as much as I appreciate your help with other chores. you can't keep on being useless when it comes to culinary." uraume spoke as they looked at you expectingly as they tried to make their point, if you were going to help with the tasks you should master them all to no exception. you slowly stepped closer as they handed you a butcher knife, expecting you to preform on one of the bodies laying on the cooking counter. "watch and do as i say....you have potential." they held your hand under theirs as they guided your hand to work while they stood behind you, trapping your form between their body and the counter facing you. "start off first by chopping off the limbs from the main body, slide into it but if you can't slice through due to a bone, use your strength to push the knife through, then well follow by skinning the meat- are you listening?" they snapped you back to reality, your mind was going off somewhere while you let them take complete control of your hand which was moving along as they mostly did the work, a faint blush appear on your face from embarrassment, stuttering to form a word to reply to them. uraume was confused for a moment by your off behaviour before it finally clicked, they narrowed their cold eyes as they stared down at you. "You are. getting yourself in deep trouble." This cooking lesson is not going like it was suppose to, i wonder who's fault is that....

uraume's eyes landed on your exposed breasts, nipples already hardening, making their face redden even more at the sight. they couldn't help but lean down, licking one nipple, making you gasp. they then took it between their lips, sucking softly while they kneaded your other breast with their hand, which resulted in a gasped moan escaping your lips before uraume's hand came to cover your mouth as you grinded against each other in the back of the kitchen while the other servants were working "quiet down, unless you wish for us to be caught in this lewd position." uraume whispered in your ear, their hot breath sending shivers down your spine as they pressed your back even more against the wall, trapping you there helplessly as you fought hard to hold back the faint moans escaping your lips as you grinded on uraume's clothed thigh, wetting their robes with your dripping pussy while they paid close attention to your breasts, uraume's other hand slid off your mouth when they trusted you to stay quiet to slide down to finally play with your aching cunt that was crying for attention for so long now. you muffled your mouth with your hand as you tired to surpass the loud moan that was threatening to flee you mouth as soon as their finger started skilfully massaging your clit, you moaned before uraume locked your lips together in a heated kiss to shut you up, your robe sliding off your body as you wrapped your arms around their neck as you kiss back, the rush of pleasure running through your body has you a trembling wet mess against uraume, before they finally broke the kiss, leaving you breathless. yet the pleasure didn't last long before uraume suddenly pulled away from you and fixed their own rode before quickly pressuring you to dress back presentably. uraume hurriedly stepped out of the back to the main kitchen just in time before sukuna swung the sliding door open, if only wasn't it to uraume's sharp sense to predict sukuna's close coming you two would have been caught, sukuna hummed as he stared down at uraume before he shifted his gaze to you, rode barely put on properely and seating like hell, both from the adrenaline pumping through your body from almost getting caught and the heat of the moment you had just experienced not five seconds ago, sukuna narrowed his eyes. "you're sweating bullets, is cooking for your king really a hard task for you? pfft- pathetic."

you were thoroughly shocked at uraume's ability to stay reserved and presentable even after what had happened merely seconds ego, well from the looks you and uraume have been exchanging this won't be a one time thing....

made by: @toga-003 AN: i fried my brain trying to write this fr, but it turned out better than i had expected, i hpe you enjoyed and you better join the next jjk underrated character poll!

[matt-murdockk]

Human 101: Cooking

pairing: rk800 connor x reader

words: 2.1 k

warnings: language, self-deprecating humour, lack of proofreading, fic from reader's pov

summary: human 101 with (y/n) and Connor, a crash course on the basics of humanity, brought to you by sumo and a very sleep-deprived writer (comedy, fluff)

additional context: reader has a rampant crush on Connor, as established in Short Circuit, this could be treated as a sequel in spirit or just a standalone.

a/n: thanks for all the love for my previous fic, here's another one <3

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unlike other deviants, Connor took his time to come to terms with his deviancy. Imagine you live your entire life (even if your whole life was barely a couple weeks) thinking your only purpose was to, say, hunt dogs. What would you do if you woke up one day to find you were the dog all along? This feels like a bad analogy. You get the point.

That kind of revelation would definitely come with its own baggage. I mean, I can't even begin to imagine what it must've been like. So even if Connor has finally made his peace with being a deviant, I have made it my life's mission to help him experience the highs and lows of being fully human. Call it Human 101.

Lesson one? Cooking. Sure "Love makes us human" Yeah okay but if you really think about it, it is cooking. Literally no other species cooks. Everyone fucks. Go figure.

"Cooking is fundamental," I told him, as we stood in my kitchen. "It’s like… the ultimate human bonding experience. Families, friends, lovers-" I stopped myself there, flustered, oops, but he didn’t seem to notice. "It’s about creating something from scratch, with your hands. Plus, we get to eat it after. Win-win."

"I should inform you that I already have access to an extensive database of recipes and culinary techniques. If required, I can prepare any dish with precise measurements and optimal timing. There is a less than one percent chance of error."

"Oh, no no," I laughed. "We can't follow recipes, God, no. Cooking is about spontaneity. About chaos. Screwing up is where the fun is."

His head tilted slightly, LED blinking yellow as though he were processing my statement. "You believe the experience is improved by the possibility of failure?"

"Absolutely!" I said, grabbing a whisk from the counter. "It's not just about the taste, you know? You need to spill flour everywhere, accidentally burn the sauce, or switch salt with sugar. That's the human way. You mess up, you laugh about it, and sometimes you end up making something even better than you planned."

Connor stared at me for a long moment, as though trying to reconcile my argument with his programming. "This is… counterintuitive. But intriguing."

"Exactly!" I said, pointing the whisk at him like I’d just solved world hunger. "Now, step one: forget the database. No looking up recipes. We’re winging it."

He blinked at me. "Winging it?"

"Yes. We’re going to use whatever’s in the fridge and figure it out as we go. Trust me, it’ll be great."

He looked at me like there was a loading screen inside his head. "Statistically, this approach has a higher likelihood of failure. That is... good?"

"Exactly." I grinned, tossing him an apron. "Let's get cooking, Wall-E."

Connor caught the apron mid-air, holding it up like it was a wet sock. "Is this truly necessary for the process?"

"Oh yeah, big time," I said, tying my own around my waist. "It’s part of the uniform. Cooking without an apron is like... running a mission without a plan."

That got a faint quirk of his lips. "I wasn’t aware cooking was so strategic."

"It’s not," I said, pulling open the fridge and gesturing dramatically. "It’s pure chaos. Okay, what do we have?"

Connor peered inside with the precision of someone scanning a battlefield. It may as well have been, honestly. "Tomatoes, cheese, leftover chicken, and... two peppers approximately three days past their optimal freshness." No, I am not embarrassed about how I ration. Okay fine, a little bit.

"Perfect. We’re making pizza."

He straightened slightly, tilting his head at me. "A pizza is typically constructed using dough as a base. There is no dough present."

"There will be if we make it from scratch. Flour, water, some yeast if I remembered to buy it... probably. Easy."

As I started rummaging through the pantry, Connor stayed rooted in place, watching me like he was making notes like I'd be quizzing him on pantry rummaging etiquette later. When I turned around, a bag of flour in hand, I caught him staring.

"What?"

"I was considering how often you engage in these… unpredictable approaches. It’s unconventional. Yet, it appears to bring you joy."

I paused, caught off-guard by how earnestly he’d said it. "Yeah, I guess it does. Life’s too short to stress about being perfect all the time, you know?"

Connor seemed to mull that over, but instead of replying, he reached for the bag of flour. "Allow me. The chances of you spilling that are statistically high."

"Oh, wow, thanks for the vote of confidence," I said, rolling my eyes.

He smiled then- an actual, honest-to-goodness smile that made my stomach do a weird little flip.

We started working on the dough together. Well, I started working on the dough, he was fighting demons. It was hilarious. It was like the dough owed him money.

"Dude, dude, relax. The dough isn't your enemy. You're not interrogating the dough. You need to be gentle with it. We like the dough. The dough is our friend."

"The same way Hank is our friend?"

"Hank is dough, yes."

"Well, Hank is not responding well to my kneading."

Wait. A joke? Was that a joke? Holy shit.

I blinked at him, eyebrows shooting up. “Did you just…?”

His lips twitched, though it was still subtle. “I’m capable of humor when required.” I nudged him lightly with my elbow, the warmth of the moment sinking in. He gave the dough another half-hearted punch, then added, “I don't understand why Dough Hank isn't cooperating.”

“Well, firstly, stop punching it like it owes you money. You have to be gentle. Dough requires finesse.”

He tilted his head, his LED spinning in thought. “Finesse,” he repeated, his hands hesitating awkwardly above the dough.

His struggling with the dough was honestly the most adorable thing I have ever seen. He was trying, he really was, but his confusion from the dough not reciprocating for all his efforts and him not being able to wrap his head around it made for a hilarious staring contest between Dough Hank and Connor. He held it up and stared at it closely, possibly with malicious intent.

Earth to (Y/n), I stepped closer until I was pressed lightly against his side. “Here, let me show you.” Sliding my hands over his, I guided his movements, pressing gently into the dough, folding and rolling it in a smooth rhythm. “See? You’re not fighting it. You’re working with it.”

Connor followed my lead, his hands relaxing under mine. His head dipped slightly, and when I glanced up, I realized he was watching me instead of the dough. I was hyperaware of the fact that I was so close to him and was very sure he could figure out just how nervous I was feeling.

“So, we negotiate with the dough,” he murmured, his voice quieter, almost teasing now.

“Exactly,” I said, laughing softly. “Negotiation is key. Be nice, and it’ll be nice back.”

I watched him start over with dough Hank, this time, more gently. Like he was getting the hang of it. "I think I’m starting to understand," he murmured.

I raised an eyebrow. “Understand what?”

"What being human is about," he said quietly, his voice almost contemplative. “It’s about embracing it. The mess, the failure, the laughter. The joy of not being perfect. I quite like the idea of not having to be perfect all the time."

In all honesty, I was not sure how to respond to that. He looked like a huge burden had been lifted off his shoulders like someone had just told him it was okay to breathe for the first time. And, for a moment, I almost didn’t want to ruin it.

His LED flickered a soft yellow, his eyes- those damn calm eyes- finally looking a little less... distant. It felt like I was staring at the kind of person you’d want to confide in, the kind who’d get it.

I bit my lip, trying not to smile. “You okay there, Connor?”

He glanced up, that soft smile still hanging on his lips. “I believe so,” he said, voice uncharacteristically light. “I think I’m finally making progress. With understanding humanity. And dough Hank.”

I snorted, quickly covering my mouth to hide the laugh. "Well, dough Hank was a tough nut to crack, but you did it, so good job."

He smiled, like he was proud of himself, and looked so damn cute. I shook myself out of my thoughts and grabbed the rolling pin, ready to get back to work. "Alright, now that we’ve figured out how to negotiate with dough, let’s make this pizza. We’re going all in."

Connor, still looking oddly content, glanced at the ingredients on the counter. "I assume we’ll be using the tomatoes, cheese, and chicken? I’ve been considering possible toppings. The peppers are not ideal."

"Connor, I have no regard for my safety and you don't have a digestive system. I think we'll be fine."

"Suit yourself, (Y/n)." Again. That damn lilt in his voice when he says my name. It's like he knows what it's doing to me. Asshole.

After about 20 minutes, Dough Hank had fully become Pizza Hank and it was finally time.

"Alright, Baymax. Moment of Truth."

"I must ask. What is with the various robot nicknames? Are they terms of endearment?"

"Sure, let's go with that."

"Noted. In that case, it only seems appropriate to assign you one in return... Sugar?"

"Oh wow, no. God, just, no."

"Sport?"

"Nope."

"Champ?"

"Worse!"

"I'm bad at this, aren't I?"

"Baby steps, C3PO."

I liked this. Banter, his company, this... the whole thing. Whatever it can be called. Watching him discover things I have known my entire life is such an enthralling experience. It's like that one revelation you have when you're like 7 or 8 when you realize that you are alive TM. Except this time, you're watching someone else have it. I don't know if any of this makes sense, but what I do know is that I don't want this to end any time soon.

"Wow, this is disgusting."

Pizza Hank was a pile of dog shit. It was like a troll and an ogre had a baby on my tongue. No self-respecting person would put that in their mouth a second time. My mouth hates me for this.

"I thought failure was welcome. Is it not?"

"Yeah, but this is straight-up nuclear, my guy. I wouldn't eat this if someone paid me money."

"Well, while I cannot taste food the way humans do, I am able to simulate the experience of tasting by analyzing the composition of the food. I could describe it to you if you would like."

"Really? What do you think?" he picked up a slice and confidently took a bite out of it.

"Yeah, this is awful."

I put my hands up in resignation. Cooking was a disaster. I am useless and do not deserve nice things. Pain is eternal and hell beckons.

"I'm sorry for wasting your time, this is all my fault."

"Failure, as you pointed out, is part of the process. And it wasn’t a waste of time."

I groaned, dropping onto a stool and burying my face in my hands. "It’s not even edible. We can’t exactly bond over a pile of inedible sludge."

“I don’t think the goal here was actually to cook something edible, was it? From what I understand, it was about experiencing the act of cooking- and bonding with each other. By that measure, I believe we have succeeded.”

I was caught off guard. He thought we "successfully bonded". Please excuse me while I pass away.

"You really think so?"

He nodded while smiling at me reassuringly while putting the mangled remains of pizza Hank back on the plate. "Besides, per my observation, your shift in mood could be a result of hunger."

"Yeah, I haven't eaten anything all day, have I?"

"Not to my knowledge."

"You wanna get good pizza and go to Real Hank's place?"

"I would love to. I have been meaning to see Sumo."

cut-scene from the car ride <3

"I just assumed the pizza would be edible. You know? I can call it optimism all I want but that's just a lack of planning."

"Is lack of planning an inherent human trait?"

"Oh, Yeah. Top of the list, actually."

a/n: now I liked Short Circuit more but here's part 2 <3 also yes I took the cooking makes us human bit from another popular tumblr post, i just thought it was hilarious

[phas3d]

Can you do slytherin boys with a reader who’s a terrible cook like really bad and she cooks for them

Bad Cook || Slytherin Boys

type :: fluff

tw/cw :: food, vomit mentions

contains :: draco, tom, mattheo, theodore, lorenzo

notes :: i also cant cook for shit even though ive taken a culinary class LMAOOO - 🐍 :: masterlist!

DRACO MALFOY

Acts as if he's not shocked when you surprise him with a homemade lunch

But in reality, he's so honored to know that you care enough about him to make him a whole meal

Starts to brag to other people around him, like "Yeah, my partner just made me lunch no big deal"

He takes a bite out of it and starts to slowly chew it...

Too much salt, not mixed properly, chicken was slightly pink, jesus christ even the fucking bento box you put it in was slightly melted

Draco has no clue how the fuck you messed up his lunch so awfully but he has to thug it out

His entire group is watching him risk getting salmonella just for you so he doesn't have to admit that your cooking is bad

After he finishes it all,,, he throws up

Instantly he signs you up for cooking lessons

But when you get offended by this and even start to tear up, his soft spot opens up

So then he offers to join in for the cooking lessons and you're instantly happier by that

TOM RIDDLE

When you first made him food, he was slightly shocked that you’d make him anytbing

He was super weary of it at first, he refused to let his guard down for anything

Deeply inspects the food at first, like INSANELY

Pulls out a microscope and investigates each and every cell of it

He even makes Mattheo try it first just in case there’s a secret spell that he can’t see

(Mattheo doesn’t even realize Tom’s bad intentions, he just views it as free food 😭)

But once he realizes it’s fully safe and that he shouldn’t doubt you so much, he tries it

And oh…

Surprisingly, he’ll take it like a champ and swallow it

And he’ll even eat MORE of it???

Because he’s used to super shit food

He grew up in an orphanage before he found out he was Voldemorts son, so he’s used to it

If anything, he kinda likes the nostalgia it brings back for him

But, once he finished and you ask for a review: he’s honest that it tastes like shit

But that he doesn’t care :”)

Will cook with you next time and give you tips on how to be better

Because he’s actually a really good cook himself

He learned how to cook because the elves weren’t making food up to his standard LOL

Now cooking together is a nightly-ritual for you too

MATTHEO RIDDLE

Mattheo was in an orphanage with his brother for most of his life, so he's used to shit food

When he takes a bite of your burnt, expired, and disgusting sandwich, he doesn't flinch

He finishes it all and even licks his fingers

Not cause it was good but because he was hungry

But you assume he must have really liked it

So you offer to make sandwiches for his Quidditch teammates

Tells you "No" very bluntly which hurts your feelings

He feels bad instantly so he tries to make excuses

He lies and says his entire team is gluten free and uhhhh allergic to bread and wheat!!!

You believe this, thankfully, and decide to not make sandwiches

Phewwww

THEODORE NOTT

Theo is a natural born cook thanks to his mom

Makes the best Italian and European food ever

So when you decided to take over cooking for one day, he was shocked but allowed you to

Didn’t want to bother you, but he would watch you cook

The entire time he’s watching you, he’s cringing…

You snapped the pasta in half…

You spilled half of the tomato sauce…

The meat was barely marinated and seasoned…

Starts to plan a way to save the food because he knows it going to be shit already

So he comes into the kitchen to “kiss you”

He’s not lying, he does kiss you

BUT he’s also secretly sneaking in seasoning and garnish

Starts to “hug you” because he misses you so much!!!! But in reality he’s gonna gag looking at your monstrous spaghetti…

When you serve it, you’re surprised to see that it was actually decent!!! Normally it would be green,,,, somehow….

Theo is shocked when you say that… cause how tf did you do that

But he’s still disgusted by the spaghetti but he won’t admit it

Lies and eats a small bit before using magic to make it disappear

(He sent it to Lorenzo’s room, making it accidentally land all over his )

Will insist that HE should be in charge of cooking from then on and says it's because you desrve princess treatment

He's not lying,,, but he's just telling a little white lie

LORENZO BERKSHIRE

You made him a fresh batch of cookies just for him and he was so honored!!!

He was always spoiled by the Malfoy family so he's slightly used to gifts, but he's never been cocky about it

Once he took a bite, he instantly stopped chewing and started to cough

But he choked it down and smiled at you

He didn't want to hurt your feeling and he distracted you

The second you were busy, he threw it all away and acted like he loved it

Then he tries to bring up the idea of cooking classes together as a fun date

He's not lying though, it was a fun date

And you do learn a lot!

So when you bake him another batch of cookies, he's excited to see if you improved

But once again, he takes a bite and instantly hit with an overwhelming amount of unmixed flour in his mouth

He smiles but is so lost on how you managed to fuck it up again

But he's set on making you a better chef for the safety of not only himself but also yourself

So he plans an at-home cooking date and he watches you fuck up constantly

He's very quick to fix it and tell you how to do better

He words himself perfectly to not hurt your feelings yet still teach you

Very sweet about it and nice :)

thank you for reading ! 🐍 :: masterlist!