#I don't know how to stop

[ramblings-of-lola]

Mourning the amount of reading I could do if I wasn't addicted to social media

[pardonmydelays]

i've been looping doubt (demo) since 8am today i need help

[mixermixey]

just blacked out and wrote 4000 words in 2 days wtf happened

[acupofselfcontrol]

I just had oatmeal with things in it (I usually literally just eat plain oats cooked in water, not because of my ed, just because I enjoy plain oats😭😭😭😭)

it was SO yummy, it had hemp hearts, a bit of honey, a tiny bit of salt, and fruit, and I also had a coffee WITH MILK and a little sugar, than I added 2 squares of chocolate to my oats because I can:3

[pinolitas]

idk why I'm making things worse for myself. making a bigger dent in my skin. gonna just grow my hair out and have a bald spot right there forever

[hells-greatestdad]

//

Real talk, I'm sorry if all the ooc posts n shit are annoying

But also, they're not going away. I know myself well enough to know that I can't resist sharing too many of my thoughts online.

In the end, you can unfollow if you don't like them.

[polar-bears-making-pancakes]

it's always like this: I think I'm making a friend and it so fun and I like spending time with this person, I talk about them with someone and they are like uh oh? 😏 you like each other huh?😏😏, and then I freak out what if they like mel like that? I don't want them to like me like that I don't like them like that I just wanted to make a friend 😭 and I hyperanalise all ours interactions and I feel like I might've lead them on and then I distance myself from them 😭 and i feel like a complete asshole

[an-na-ko]

Saw it was make a terrible comic day today (June 24 2025) so meet my cats

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The math just adds up!

[miserywizard]

i mean the issue is i'm scrambling for what Could Happen here and do i need to make up New Things or do i need to rearrange things. i've changed the core of the book so it's focused on Skolova but i've also trapped merin and thorne in merin's depression tower for a month so. like. maybe i'm over thinking this. maybe the something happening can just be pushing forward merin dropping that thorne was a wizard before her ex girlfriend locked her in a box for three years. that doesn't have to be some midway reveal i can do that early

[wintermav]

Wolverine being a confirmed boy kisser by Hugh Jackman.

[jojaxcola]

"no one told me back then that i was in the glory days."

[ jojamart mockumentary #14 ]

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[notasaint]

i wish your blue eyes couldn't see all my lies, schemes i've built, how i just couldn't help myself...

[judadisyourjudaddy]

slowly but surely i am becoming a worse and much worse human being (*චᆽචﾉﾉﾞ☆ﾟﾟ

[future-crab]

I know I just made a post about it, but "You can't take loved away," fucks me up SO bad. Nona, who's known that she's dying for ages, facing the fact that regaining her memories is a form of dying that she hasn't prepared for. Nona, who isn't afraid of dying but is so, so scared of becoming someone who doesn't love Camilla, Palamedes, and Pyrrha. Nona, who is love - deep, vibrant, endless love, for the whole world but especially for her family. "I won't love anything... I won't know how."

And Paul. Paul, who's already done the thing Nona is afraid, or at least a version of it. Two people who Nona loved more than anything in the world died and became Paul, and Paul both is and isn't Camilla and Palamedes. Paul, who regardless of whether they are or aren't the people Nona loved, loves Nona. Paul tells her, "Camilla and Palamedes were loved by Nona. Pyrrha was loved by Nona. It's finished, it's done. You can't take loved away. We loved you too. Palamades and Camilla loved you."

And I'm just supposed to be okay after that.