#I started everything
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God, I’m so tired. She fights for this when I want her to let go, but she didn’t fight when I was
I’m trying to move one. I already have. But she won’t let me go.
I used to see forever in her eyes.
Now I see it in their’s.
They make me happy. She doesn’t. Not anymore.
They get me excited to talk. I’m not sure if she ever did.
They start, before I have to ask. She never did.
I want to be happy. I want to do what makes me happy.
I don’t know much but I don’t think it’s her anymore. I think it’s them.
#bit of a vent#or rant#idk#why is romance so complicated#like I know who I like#but I don’t think everything just#dissapered for her#but also I’m kinda pissed at her#I tried to fight and stay#but now that I want to go#she can fight#she didn’t before#why now#right person wrong time#don’t give me that#where was that when you didn’t ever start a text#I started everything#touch#texts#I made an effort#she thinks it can still be romantic#how do I tell her I fell for someone else#I fell for someone else because it didn’t#feel like we were together#it didn’t feel like anything#but with them?#it feels like…#everything
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Tenna watch out for the thirst comments
#deltarune#tenna#kris deltarune#susie deltarune#ralsie deltarune#spamton#deltarune fanart#mr ant tenna#utdr#kris dreemurr#spamtenna#what the hell sure#deltarune chapter 3 spoilers#in the sense that tenna is present#DW about the logistics they’re having a fun time and that’s all that matters#I’m PISSED I missed a bunch of stuff on my playthrough I’m gonna have to go back and play everything from the start#I was rushing bc I was scared of spoilers#I’ll do real fan art later I was struck with a vision and had to do this first#I will be exploring (how to draw) his body so stay tuned I guess
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genuinely so scary that you can't access the page on the ssc website that guides you through changing your sex designation. so so fucking scary. they are already making our lives harder. they are already taking what little resources we have.
#thes.txt#felt my heart fucking sink when i went to double check it#i could access it a few days ago.#i have my appointment tomorrow at least#hoping i can get everything changed. and fast#thankful that i started all of this in november#i felt the urgency then. i feel it now too#transgender
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newest issue of first years fashion just dropped
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#yuji itadori#nobara kugisaki#fushiguro megumi#itafushikugi#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#this quickly got away from me#taking hina from 3 days ago who thought 'yeah ill do 3 outfits for each of them what's the harm' and strangling her w my bare hands#original concept fr this was drawing the kids each matching a different outfit w gojo#but i got frustrated by th heights and placement so i said no tall people allowed and scrapped gojo from plans <3#tbh it wouldnt have been /that/ much better in terms of workload but the 3 drawings it would have saved me isnt nothing#but im just complaining fr nothing atp lmao i love all of these sm i love playing dress up with my tuoys (the jjk first years)#love treating them like mannequins i love coming up w outfits layer those kids UP#nobara especially i have so much fun brainstorming she looks good in everything To Me#i dressed megumi more smart casual than normal bc he's got gojo's credit card info and if i want him in balenciagas gdi he's gna get them#also listen i love megumi we know this but fr the sake of not dressing him in solid colour slacks and sweaters 3 different ways#i gave him the workout fit. it cant b yuuji all the time ok i think we deserve megumi in a compression shirt as a treat#speaking of yuuji good god where do i start#he's definitely stylish but in a 'got dressed in the dark/threw on the first articles of clothing i saw' way and i adore him so much for it#wears things tht make him happy w no regard for how they may or may not look tgt bless his heart#also i drew th skateboard fr posing purposes entirely forgetting my prior hc that yuuji cant skate so i roughed him up fr consistency#th boy just ate concrete but is ready to get back up and try again what a champ#anyway bless this line and shading style i lov u less detailed render i love u sharp swoopy fabric lines#saved me sm time fr#also this is my application fr the mappa jjk marketing team they should hire me and let me dress the chars id be so good i promise#ill even take out the vocaloid and pop culture references i wont infringe on any ip i sweaaarr
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thinking about how the best case scenario that elphaba can imagine in the wizard and i is that finally someone will come along who will be able to change everything about her. even in her wildest dreams, she views that as her best option.
and then.
along comes galinda. who - after spending an entire night attempting to give her a makeover - settles on: ‘actually, you’re perfect just the way you are. i wouldn’t change a thing. except maybe to tuck a little piece of myself in with you, just there.’
and i just think that’s neat.
#gelphie#wicked#wicked movie#and don’t get me started on how actually elphie gets basically everything she wished for in that song through glinda#at the oz dust when finally no one thinks she’s strange#standing hand in hand in the emerald city#anyway#i just think they’re meant for each other
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he is touching vik’s lil mole above his lip :3
#ciilsketch#jayvik#posting here too hehe…..#i started this sketch around the time harry mentioned cottage au with 4 kids LOLL#2 wolves inside me wrt post canon jv either Torment Nexus or happily ever after domestic life#physical touch love language jayce n vik getting used to it in romantic context#i think full flush blush vik would be v cute…#i feel like prior to this he would not be easy to fluster#but u kno mb after everything he will let himself open up more hehe#sry whole essay here ANYWAYS. I JUST THINK THEY ARE NEAT
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I Can’t Help But Wonder
Odysseus, who just violently and mercilessly murdered 108 or so men, who claims in the next song that he’s no longer a kind or gentle man, actively listens to Telemachus and kindly and gently responds to everything his son’s expressed.
Telemachus asks, “Am I like you? Am I strong like you? Will you embrace me? Will you love and accept me as yours?” He says, “I’ve felt so alone.”
And Odysseus claims him in a heartbeat, answering, “My son. My boy. My sweetest joy I’ve ever known. I embraced you twenty years ago. I’d do the impossible for you. I’d die for you.” He says, “Seeing the men here today, I can only wonder what you’ve been through for twenty years. My son, you’re already strong. You’re my own. You’re not alone. I’m home.”
And then they fucking embrace.
#don’t mind me I’m just over here sobbing#something something Odysseus being an attentive loving father drenched in blood#the way he literally responds to everything#he says ‘you are MY SON I’ve never stopped embracing you’#‘I may be deranged and unhinged after years of torment but I’ll be damned before I let you think you’ve ever been unloved by me’#the instrumentals reflect it too#Tele’s piano is hesitant and very faint during his part overwhelmed by Ody’s guitar#the moment ody starts singing the piano blends immediately#Ody’s got open arms for his son#epic the musical#epic#odysseus#epic odysseus#epic telemachus#telemachus#epic the Ithaca saga#the ithaca saga#ithaca saga
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The silliest crossover because I couldn't stop thinking how nicely it fits lol.
I decided to leave these as sketches instead of finishing them because uuuuuh. Who has time for that!
#one piece#usopp#god usopp#ghost princess perona#dr vegapunk#one piece usopp#stella vegapunk#perona#do you think they put luffy in a painting.#also I thought Perona fits nicely as King Boo fkdjhskdjh#I guess she's the Boo Princess......#crossover#me art#remember to post this on main this time instead of putting everything on the OP sideblog(s)? yeah.#these started as whiteboard doodles btw edkfjhsdkjf
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acheiropoieton, still alive in the crypt.
#art#my art#angels#this started out as a study and now we're here#idk what to tag this#would it be fucked up if there was a miraculous image that appeared on your bedroom wall above your bed and it started slowly eating#the wall and everything around it#calling to you until you gave in and let yourself be eaten#what if centuries later people built a church around that icon and it was still hungry#ah yes#crypt#religious imagery ( catholic )#horror#i think this counts as horror?
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A trick of the light you're sure...
#the draws#isat#in stars and time#this started as a 'despite everything its still you' isabeau doodle and it ended up like this#this isnt referencing anything specific i just wanna torture isabeau for a second#like the one time isa inspects the mirror closer and sees something out of the corner of his eye
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i think alphonse would still experience depersonalization and dysmorphia even after getting his body back
#alphonse elric#obviously hes glad about having it back#but there's this unease at the back of his mind#because hes been put into a new body that is drastically different from the one he was in for years for a second time#and that body isnt the one he lost. it had changed so much since he was 10 and i dont even think he could recognize himself for a while#i also think thats why he got the exact same haircut he had as a kid. to feel more like that younger and more familiar version of himself.#anyway i think he would still feel like he lost another part of himself by gaining everything back#even if he hated every second of being in that armor and even if all he ever wanted was to be normal again#he still spent 5 years in that body. long enough to begrudgingly become used to it#and for his body to change instantly into an unrecognizable version of himself#i dont think he had an easy time adjusting to being so different physically#even beyond the fact that he had to spend months/years physically recovering#oughhh its such a weird and complex feeling to miss something that made him miserable#just because that familiarity is more comforting than all of the pain and overstimulation of gaining his senses back#and being a completely different person physically#i also think hed have trouble sleeping for a while and start Thinking About Things He Shouldn't at night again#this is one of those things#fma#fullmetal alchemist#fma fanart#fmab fanart#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood#fma art#fmab#fma brotherhood
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sentinel cant be a bad person
#because if he isnt#then why do i continue to live the way i do?#transformers one#humanformers#transformers#d 16#orion pax#elita one#b 127#bumblebee#fun is over im back to hitting u guys with rocks and bricks#i dont blame dee or find his behavior unreasonable#imagine some dude u literally just met and has been saying nonsense and lying the entire time tells u lebron james locked him in a closet#like wth thats my goat what r u on 😭#i love d16#unfortunately without solid proof or evidence he wont be swayed as easily#but he is starting to second guess everything...
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was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.
to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:
kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#kabru#kabru already added laios as a discord friend. everyone else in the server can see laios excitedly asking kabru to go with him#what would You even Do in this situation. how would YOU feel?#basically: kabru isnt a laios-hater! hes just in shock bc Thats His Trauma. the key part is kabru still says yes#bc he wants to get to know laios. to understand why laios would be so fascinated by something horrific to him#and ALSO bc even while in shock kabru can still tell laios has unique expertise + knowledge that Could be used for Good#even if kabru doesnt fully trust laios yet (bc kabru just started talking to the guy 2 hours ago. they barely know each other)#kabru also understands that getting to know ppl (esp laios) means having to get to know their passions. even if it triggers his trauma here#but thats too much to fit in this metaphor/analogy. this is NOT an AU! its not supposed to cover everything abt kabru or laios' character!#its a self-contained metaphor written Specifically to be more easily relatable+thus easy to understand for general ppl online#(ie. assumed discord users. hence why i said (a non-specific) 'discord server' and not something specific like 'car repair subreddit')#its for ppl who mightve not fully grasped kabru's character+intentions and think hes being mean/'chaotic'/murderous.#to place ppl in kabru's shoes in an emotionally similar situation thats more possible/grounded in irl experiences and contexts.#and also for the movie punchline#mynn.txt#dm text#crossposting my tweets onto here since my friends suggested so
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GET LOVED, IDIOT
GET LOVED SO HARD YOUR KIDS HOLD HANDS AND POWER-OF-LOVE YOU BACK TO LIFE
sorry guys, this is just my brain now. this is going to be the only thing I think about for the next week at least.
oh and also this
FIVE YEARS IN AND IT'S FINALLY CANON 🎉🎉🎉
WE DID IT
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#oh my god it had everything i wanted AND MORE#...except the hook for 8 which ironically was the only one i was 100% sure was guaranteed to happen#well whatever i am too busy floating in this pool of delicious diasomnia tears#SO MANY TEARS#malleus' voice acting was absolutely 🤌 delectable 🤌#him and silver both are usually so reserved you don't even notice until suddenly FULL-ON UGLY SOBBING#IKANAI DE KURE LILIAAAAAAAAAAA#god. i have so much i need to draw. malleus in his little royal outfit...#ENDLESS MELEANOR F O R E V E R#(ah...meleanor and the knight of dawn are holding hands... :) you've reconciled... :) how lovely...)#(oh...and bauru is here too...)#can't believe poor sebek got 'and also you're here'-ed even at a time like this#that rhythmic was SO cute i'm gonna die. he's your son so it should be ✨PINK✨#ugh this update has spoiled me absolutely rotten. i'm so happy#though i kept waiting for that silver vanrouge and finally decided it wasn't going to happen#then got the 'there is one thing...but it's not a gift that malleus-sama can give...'#and THAT'S WHEN THEY DID THE HOTFIX UPDATE AND I GOT BOOTED#and then i KEPT GETTING ACCESS ERRORS DUE TO HIGH VOLUME 😭#twst NO i didn't need that tension to be heightened thank you#on the other hand when malleus started his proclamation with 'in the name of the draconias...' i did have a second#where i was briefly convinced they were going to do the funniest possible thing and make silver draconia canon after all#anyway i'm out of tags so we'll have to discuss malleus' absolutely bonkers-cuckoo choice of party venue later#now i gotta get back to constantly rewatching the moment he realizes he's accidentally killed lilia. his weeping is my sustenance.
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bugs when you lift up a rock
#jumping in between the persona games is such a curse oh my god#i’m playing p4 simultaneously watching tumblr user haliai play p3 and in addition hyperfixating over p5#it’s just reference after reference after reference i can’t catch a break 😭#shoutout to the justice arcana‼️ gotta be one of my favs‼️ go featherman and dead moms am i right?#anyway i want to play p5 again soon for akechi…..missing him very badly i wish p4 had a character like him#“but adachi—!” nuh uh doesn’t count#ANYWAY AUGHHHHHH shuake save me shuake…….actually missing them like a bitch 🙏🏼#everything reminds me of them#if i think abt them for too long i genuinely start to feel sick#persona 5 royal#p5r#persona 5#p5#goro akechi#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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so one of the things I was vaguely aware of before reproducing was that people hold a lot of anxiety around the gender of babies and 'wrongly' gendering babies (i.e. failing to guess correctly based on their clothes and appearance what their genital configuration is) and having now had a baby: wow, yes, they really do.
I take an extremely laissez-faire approach to baby clothes because like, they are constantly being thrown up on and grown out of and so on, what matters is that they are clean and easy to put on and I am not spending $$$$$ on them. as long as the colour/design is not directly offensive, it's fine. what this means is that people are quite frequently 'misgendering' the baby and then falling over themselves to apologise about it.
and, like, I haven't even had a chance to dress him in anything pink yet; this is based on rules I didn't expect like 'anything with flowers or sparkly bits on it is for girls only'. equally, I do not care when this happens because it's an irrelevancy, but THEY care to make sure I am not offended. so I have started telling them "look, he's only [x] months old; his gender is baby."
and you know what? you'd be surprised how many otherwise average heterosexual people process this and go "huh, yeah, I guess it is." there is a tiny amount of hope for the future after all.
#baby stuff#gender#I started by buying 'unisex' bundles of clothes#but that just means everything is grey and beige and dull#so now I get some 'girls' and some 'boys' and mix and match#and just leave out the aggressively gendered nonsense#(i.e. clothes with text on them announcing A Gender)
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