#OH YEAH WE HAVE A SHIP NAME FOR THESE TWO NOW

[epicfirestormer]

Whoops

[risetherivermoon]

work on all of my ao3 wips << start a new oneshot abt terry jr x lark

[dilf-docs]

Call It What You Want

husband!pedro pascal x younger!reader

summary: you and pedro are married, but you've kept it a secret up to the point you sometimes forget there's supposed to be a golden band on your finger. but then you both get cast in your first movie together. the chemistry is off the charts, and it starts to catch upon you: will the lines between shipping and reality finally blur?

warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (ñom), smut, dry humping, oral (m. receiving) while pedro wears the skirt™️ (welcome to another episode of the writer's barely disguised fetish), p. in v., teeny bit of angst because i malfunction if i don't bring sad vibes to the function, the worst ever attempt of comedy witnessed by human kind, they're so down bad it hurts, jealous!reader, possesive!pedro, reader speaks spanish and may or may not have direct/indirect latino blood somewhere, use of spanglish but no translations ☹️ (boo go do your homework, citizens. that's what u get for making my dieter bravo fic flop BYE), i transcripted two real interviews for this so keep those likes, reblogs and comments up in the air where i can see 'em 🪓🪓

word count: 11,706 words

side note: hello! this is me, sliding my cv to become president of the pedro pascal fics. i'm kidding, just on duty to fulfill another request 🫡 believe it or not, i envisioned something like this but for myself IJBOL we have to keep the delusional levels UP!! i hope this meets ur expectations, it was fun to write :)

part: prev | masterlist | next

"Please welcome, the internet's newest darling, Y/n L/n!"

You walk into the set, cameras flashing bright and the band playing on the back. You hug Jimmy Fallon, and when he notices your body trembling he tells you everything will be alright. So did your manager before you stepped inside, but you can't help the nerves. You've never been this big before, and now it's all coming down together without letting you breath.

You take your seat and so does Jimmy.

"Hello, Y/n. This is your first time here, right?"

"Am I being too obvious?" you snort. The crowd laughs with you.

"Don't worry. It happens, especially when you're so young"

"Oh, please" you blush. "I can promise you there are kid actors who could handle this better than I am right now"

"Kid stars?" he lets out one of his famous cackles. "No need to be humble. You are great! Let's just talk about the year you've had: big breakout roles, ascend to fame, you're rocking it!" the crowd cheers, and you again turn into a flustered mess.

"Yeah, I suppose. It's hard to dimension when you've started as an extra for popular shows, to now being, you know, the main face of projects. But I could get used to it" you smile, "it's been a dream. I still can't believe it sometimes, look- I'm shaking"

The camera pans closer to the hand you're showing to Jimmy.

"Oh my God, even big stars like you get nervous"

"Big star? I wish I could feel like a constellation. I'm feeling more like a red dwarf star, baby"

The whole place bubbles in laughter. You feel better, your manager even giving you a thumbs up from behind the cameras.

"So, Y/n" Jimmy says once the laughter dies. "You just got casted in the upcoming Gladiator II movie, directed by Ridley Scott. How does it feel to be on your first big movie, alongside names like Paul Mescal, Denzel Washington and Pedro Pascal?"

You try to steady your heartbeat. "First of all, I have to say, it's such an honor to work with Scott. I grew up watching his movies. Like, Thelma and Louis is definitely my go-to movie. So, like, getting paired with such a talented cast is as awesome as terrifying" you answer with a laugh.

"Talking about that, you see" he leans closer, like he'll tell a secret. "I've heard things about you and a certain future co-star of yours"

You shift your position on the couch, your ring(less) finger itching. You have to avoid breathing in relief when Jimmy pulls out a picture.

"Oh. My. God"

He stiffles a laugh. No way. Has the room's temperature suddenly gotten hotter? Why is your face burning?

"Will you tell us the story behind this?" he asks, the camera focusing on the picture in question. The audience laughs, and you pray to God this is a nightmare, because it's too much embarrasment for a human to bear.

"Okay" you clear your throat, coughing awkwardly. "For my 25th birthday, I uploaded a bunch of pictures on Instagram, including ones where I was a teenager" you begin to giggle, "So. Um, there was this one, you see, that's, me, in my childhood home's bedroom, and my fans were quick to notice the poster above my bed"

"You mean, this one?" and Jimmy points it out. You cover your face with your palms. "It's a... Narcos poster" the audience laughs as you get redder. "A Pedro Pascal's Narcos poster"

"I know" you groan. "Picture this: me 18, and while my friends had posters of their favorite bands and artists, I was so different because I had a whole ass poster of a crime drama show about the world's most famous drug dealer on my bedroom" you recall with a laugh. "It was hard to explain to my mom. I believe she thought I wanted to sign for the DEA or something. When I told her I was going to be an actress, she was so relieved! She said: Oh, well. You'll die, but of hunger! Not a bullet in your head, at least"

"Oh. I'm so sorry. You proved her wrong though!"

"I did! Don't worry, Jimmy. She's my biggest fan now" you look at a specific camera before saying, "Te amo mami!"

"I see you speak spanish. I sometimes forget" he comments. "You've got one thing in common with Pedro, it seems. Think that'll make working with him less awkward?"

"I just hope he forgives me or I'm capable of moving out of the country and changing names" you giggle. "Pedro, lo siento!"

"Well, that's Y/n L/n, everyone! Pedro Pascal's number one fan" you burst out laughing in shame. "More on her lastest movie after the break"

mandoshoney: tell me i'm not the only one who started shipping pedro pascal and y/n l/n PLEASE can't wait to get content of them interacting ㅤㅤann-gell: mandoshoney y/n's pedro pascal's controversially young gf era starts now! i wonder how the press tour for #gladiatorII will go 🤔 unhing3dprincess: i bet my grandma they are dating ㅤㅤstarlightt180: unhing3dprincess ptwt can never tweet like normal ppl…wdym you're betting your grandma?!!!?

You were never a fan of secrets.

But then Pedro waltzed into your life with his charming smile and iconic mustache, and before you knew it, you had married him off in some church in California one random sunday morning ("I love you so much, can't wait to marry you, cariño" "If you can't wait any longer, why not now?")

Flash forward, four years later, and you'd think such event would be plastered all over the internet. But there is a reason why only you, family, a selected number of friends and your agents knew: you kept it a secret.

To the world, he was Chile's most elegible bachelor and you were a young rising star. The public loved both of you for the same reasons: charming persona and acting skills. Yet inside the privacy of your home, he was Pedro and you were y/n, wife and husband; he was yours as you were his.

And of course, no marriage is perfect, and your first real challenge is rather funny: you both get casted in your first movie together.

It shouldn't be hard, but it is. Being inside the Gladiator II set during seven months, so far away yet so close at the same time, was torture. You were Rome's empress and he's Marcus Acacius, yet behind the scenes, the actual married couple were you both.

It was hard to pretend you didn't know what he looked like without clothes when he wore his bathing suit, or that you didn't know his favorite food when Paul asked, or acting like you weren't interested in dating when a local in Malta during your trip at the beach asked you out (he didn't know who you were. You were flattered when he called you pretty in such a hot European accent, but then Pedro appeared from seemingly "nowhere" and you remembered what your real favorite accent was. He immediately called you bonita after that)

It was so hard to keep hands to yourself when he walked by you, covered in fake blood. To not think about licking it all over and under his armour. So was to pretend the thought of dry humping him with his Roman skirt on wasn't tempting. Or that the urge to kiss him got harder and harder to fight each passing day, even getting to a point where you would envy Connie for being able to kiss your husband in the open more, a privilege you didn't have.

You were loosing your mental health here. But Pedro was no better.

It was so hard to see you, the Moroccan sun shining over your features like you were an angel. Otherworldly. That he'd see red when you'd finish filming a scene with Joseph, forcing himself to interrupt the small chat you'd engage in after. He too couldn't keep pretending he didn't want to tear off those silk dresses out of your body, and kiss you out in the open like Joseph did.

He almost failed once, cornering you in the hallway of the hotel you were staying. His hot breath lingered on your neck. I miss you, he had said. You felt his hard brush the inner of your thigh. We can't, you whispered in a dragged out voice.

It was hard.

So you gave him your used panties, and you swear you could hear him jacking off in the bathroom of his room, next to yours. He'd screamed your name, and your hand had found it's way to your dripping cunt, doing what he was supposed to do; touching you the way he did. And you came, drowned out moans against your pillow. But it wasn't like when he did it.

But God has heard your prayers.

For the first time in weeks, you're lucky. You find Pedro sitting alone in the cafeteria, his phone in hand. He's still wearing his armour and skirt, not bothering to change for the break. You aren't God's strongest soldier, but you're trying not to go down on him so badly right here and now.

"Hey" he raises his head when he hears your voice, smile adoringly. It only grows wider when he notices you alone. "Thought you'd never get rid of Paul. He's like, stitched to you"

"Same can be said about you and Joseph" you sit across him, and despite most of his tone being playful, there are still hints of jealousy behind. It arouses you deeply, and with this hot summer day above you, your skin isn't the only thing that's getting sticky.

"In case you haven't read the script, I'm his wife" you wink. "Sorry this is how you find out"

He laughs loudly, and God, how have you missed that laugh. Sure, it's been there when you've been out with the cast together, but it doesn't tingle your chest as when you're the cause of it; it feels like it's for you only, and that's what makes it special.

"I miss you so much" he whispers, his hand sliding across the table, finding yours. His thumb carresses your soft palm, and you melt under Pedro's tender touch.

"I do too" you sigh, but it's instantly replaced by what could only be described as a smug face. You lean closer, whispering on his ear, the warm meeting cold. He shivers. "Wanna know something?"

"I'm all ears"

"I just came back from walking. Guess what?No one is 'round here" you lean back against your chair, shit-eating grin on your face as all his body tenses up. "Made sure of it. The trailer zone is empty too"

Pedro gulps, his adam's apple bobbing as his eyes look at you.

"Y/n" calling your name as a warning.

"What? Can't a girl find ways to have her husband all for herself?" you snort. "Please say yes" you let go of his hand, but the free fingers now travel across his broad chest, taunting him. "C'mon, we both deserve a break"

He can't say deny you anything, can he? You know it, he knows it.

Before you register, his big hand engulfs yours as you run across the set. You giggle at his rushed steps, even more when you stand before his trailer and he's fumbling his slippery hands with the doorknob, sloppy movements erratic.

"But you told me to stop" you tease, and he doesn't even let you add more because he's pushing you inside, forcing you with rough calloused hands to a chair and then you to sit over his lap.

"Fuck, babygirl. I've spoiled you way too much" he groans against your lips. "Lo sabes, ¿verdad? Just can't say no to you"

Your eyes darken dangerously, the hunger on them mirroring his own.

"How could you ever say no to this?"

You press your chest against his broad one as your lip bites into his lower one, teasing. Pedro feels his underwear getting tighter when your tongue finds its way inside his mouth, even getting a glimpse of the taste of the strawberries you had earlier before.

He deepens the kiss, and when you pull away to catch your breath, he doesn't waste his lonely mouth and busies himself with the task of kissing your sun-kissed neck, licking and pressing his lips under your jaw. Pedro goes even lower, down until he's reached your collarbone, making you groan a bit under his wet sloppy needy mouth. He's enjoying how putty you are under his intense kissing, fingers in his curls, that have begun to damp under the ablaze of the small space and pleasure that fills the air.

"Kiss me again in my lips" you whine after a while of him teasing you with kisses that get only rougher. "Pretty please, papi"

You cup his face in your hands, and Pedro's back to kissing you in the mouth, tasting all of your insides as he hasn't had in what feels like a lifetime.

"Of course, baby. Missed this pretty mouth" he mumbles in between hot kisses, his now growing boner pressing into you.

"Baby" you giggle. The skirt he's got on may hide it, but your fingers refused to wait, pulling it up. His bulge presses against the shorts he's got under the skirt, and you can feel your pussy and mouth drool. "We have to do something about this big boy" your hands pull down the short, leaving just his underwear on. He's about to remove the skirt, but your demanding hands stops him. "This stays"

His brown concerned eyes make you laugh, but you don't give him time to think about it, rather grinding against his erection. Pedro's breath hitches when he feels your daring movements, bucking his hips against yours.

The friction is addicting, and he captures your lips once again to make you feel what he can't with words: how fucking good this feels.

You keep moving over his aching dick. Your husband throws his head back, groaning in pleasure at the way your hips move against him, knowingly. His hands find their way to your ass under the flowy almost translucent skirt you chose to change in, gripping the rosy skin tightly, hands almost covering all of it.

"You wore this for me, right, cariño? Knew I couldn't say no" he groans, firm hands on your cheeks, the grinding meeting his hips now harsher. "Less with you walking around with this slutty skirt of yours"

You make little sounds he's obssesed with, dripping out of your filthy mouth.

"Fuck" Pedro groans after a while, "I need to have you, mami. Missed you so much" eager fingers make it to your top. He growls, deep within him―guttural, ready to pull it off as he mumbles naughty wife when he realizes you got no bra on, chastising you for a "rushed" plan that seemed planned all along, when a sound cuts through the air.

You both stop.

The sound gets clearer.

It's a knock. A knock at his door.

A knock in Pedro's trailer.

And you are inside. Both.

While you're grinding him.

With his skirt on.

(It's time to build a bomb and kill yourselves off and whoever is stading behind that door)

"Pedro!" a familiar accent calls. Peudrou. It's Paul. "Hey, man. Just wondering if you are here"

He's debating on speaking up when he sees your red face and rising-falling chest before him.

"Answer" you whisper breathlessly. He tries not to groan when he fills you slip out of the spot in his middle while also trying not to think about murdering Paul as soon as he gets out.

Aside from the order, you're unexpectedly quiet, and Pedro quirks an eyebrow at you. He knows you better―you're his wife after all, and if there's something he's aware of, is your inability to loose.

"I'm here" tone clipped and annoyed. But no footsteps backtracking are heard: the Irish man is still there.

You bite your lip, watching the skirt with his legs spread, a sight too tempting. Also, he was still hard, as hard as the task to not go and keep doing your job.

Oh, fuck this shit.

Your devilish hand equals the grin in your face, fingers making their way toward his unattended bulge.

"What are you doing here?" Paul asks, but Pedro's attention has completely deviated, now focused on how they land right over his clothed dick, skirt pulled up by your other hand. "I thought you were at the cafeteria"

"Yeah?" but it comes out strained, yet the younger man doesn't notice or comment.

His hips raise when your fingers press his member, massaging it.

"Yeah" he uses a tone that equals a duh. "You texted me yourself"

Pedro rolls his eyes, wishing desperately he would go away, annoying him just as much as a fly hovering above fresh food. Talking about food, fuck, weren't you hungry? He tried to warn you, holding your wrist, but all resolve was lost the moment you looked in his eyes: he immediately pulled down his briefs, dick sprouting hard.

"Well, changed my mind" his tone falters in between words, member now free from the confines of his tight underwear.

"Are you tired, man? You sound tired" Paul comments on his tone. "Came to rest?"

You spit on your hand, and he gulps.

"Somethin' like that"

You start to jerk him off, leaving little wet kisses and licks just above his dick. Pedro's eyes are hypnotized, glued to every lick of yours across his girth, the spit making your movements smoother. Sexier. Fuck.

"Well, sorry to break it to you but rest time is over. They want us back on set now"

Your tight needy lips are wrapped around his his length and it's so hard to keep the talk normal when he justs wants to yell at Paul to fuck off. Your hand is there too; you are as of help as much as you aren't.

"I'll be there, Paul, just―Fuck!"

But his attempt to cover a moan doesn't go unnoticed.

"Are you alright in there?" he tries to enter, but Pedro locked the door. He's yelling he's fine, but Mescal doesn't sound convinced. "I can't go inside; it's locked. Are you sure you are okay, mate?"

"Didn't want you to take a picture of me drooling on my sleep" he manages to get out in a monotone voice. A real win if you take into account you've gotten to a point where you squeeze under his cock, massaging his balls.

"Smart move!" he chuckles from outside. "I guess I'll see you there"

Pedro covers a moan with his palm as he's throwing his head back in pleasure. He can feel his orgams looming over, minstrations growing sloppier around his pulsating cock, the need to fill your greedy evil mouth with his seed making him sick. He's a simple man: he just wants his pretty wife to fuck his cock silly and come in her mouth in peace. Is that so hard to get this days?

Paul seems to be finally gone as Pedro can't keep containing his grunts anymore, steps moving: until said steps sound closer again.

"Oh, I almost forgot, have you seen Y/n? I can't find her anywhere" it's coming. His orgasm is coming in the absolute worst moment. He can feel you gagging at his hard rock cock, hitting the back of your throat now. Still, your hands don't loose their grip on his cock and skirt, determination filling that sexy little body of yours. It was rather admirable the effort you were putting in this. "Think she went to the beach? She said she loved it. God, that little rebel. Anyway, if you see her, tell her-"

He leans his head back once again, seeing stars. No one knows him like his wife, truly.

The sight of you drooling from your chin, the wet sounds of him fucking himself onto your mouth as your spit-coated fingers pump his girth, you gulping down the precum from his tip, his fingers holding your face roughly by the cheeks...

"Yes, Paul, yes!" Pedro barks, barely hiding the moan that erupts from his ribcage, thick shots of his hot cum hitting your tongue and deep of the throath. "Fuck off and let me get ready"

"Jesus, mate, chill. I'm sorry. See you there"

And Paul Mescal's hovering fly ass is finally gone.

"Poor Paul" you say as soon as you pull off his length, voice raspy as you huff for air. Pedro lovingly cleans rests of your saliva and his cum from your chin as he chuckles at how much audacity, courage and horniness could fit in such a small young body. "You've ruined the friendship"

"You think?" he licks off some as you sit on his lap again, tongue directly on your face. You feel aroused again, but time's up. "It's your fault. That and this"

He points down.

"Just as you used that pretty head of yours to think of the trouble you just made, think of an excuse for Mr. Ridley about the skirt"

at0michips: wait wdym paul is sick??? ㅤㅤl-u-n-a-m: at0michips he's died vnightx: i'm wondering who'll do now the do you even know me interview with pedro now :( i was so excited!!! hope they don't cancel it :( ㅤㅤunhing3dprincess: vnightx i bet my grandma it's y/n ㅤㅤat0michips: unhing3dprincess why do u keep betting ur grandma omg 😭😭😭

"You know what I think would be fun?" Pedro comments while you wait for the interview's set to be prepared.

Tour press has finally begun. That meant you could go home for a while after the filming wrapped, just to be back for the promotion of the film. You were excited of course, the experience new and thrilling. After much needed battery recharging and husband/wife time, you were ready to take over the world.

But then Paul got sick.

Today's interview was scheduled to be him and Pedro, but since he was unavailable, they paired him with you, since you both spoke Spanish (which felt slightly racist in your opinion), and because Fred and Joseph were already paired up for the other.

You leave your coffee, knowing he's about to say something stupid or endearing, perhaps both, brown liquid probably spilling out of your mouth. Or worst, nostrils.

"Tell me"

"What if we left little hints that we're together?" his smile is one of mischief. "Like you could wear my cap, or I could wear a chain with your initial around my neck, like Ryan Gosling did at the Barbie premiere"

"Or as Taylor Swift sang" you counter. "But Pedro, dear, you're underestimating our fans. You don't think they'll match it sooner than we think?"

"Maybe" he agrees. That's just what I want. "What's funny is we're about to do a type of interview where we could blow our cover"

"Maybe" you repeat, "or maybe you don't know all about me as much as you think, Mr. Pascal"

He fake gasps, feigning hurt. "Is this a dare, Mrs. Pascal?"

"No" you try to be mature for once, cutting the banter as much as you'd like to go on and kiss him right there. "Also, remember to answer incorrectly sometimes, you know..."

"There's no way I'm letting you win though"

"Pedro, no seas necio!"

The producers arrive just in time to let you know it's ready.

"After M'lady" he's back to being charming as he is, not as husband charming but just Pedro Pascal charming. The nerve of this guy to do it in front of the LADbible crew.

"Whatever" you grumble, the nerves getting the best of you as you realize this interview may or may not give away more than you've been allowed before.

"Hello, I am Y/n L/n" you present yourself. Wow, the camera is really close. This isn't going to end well.

"And I'm Pedro Pascal"

Hearing his voice soothes you. It's okay, y/n, you got this. "And this is Do You Really Know Me- No wait, it's do you even know me. Okay, let's start again: Hello, I'm Y/n and this is-"

"I don't even know anymore" Pedro jokes, making you laugh. "Do you even know me?" he asks while looking forward, now making the crew laugh.

"This is Pedro Pascal, that'll do" you sigh.

"This is gonna be sad, she's not going to know any of these" he says, but in reality, he's mocking you, the mischief in his eyes glowing as he only looks at you tauntingly.

"Same can be said about you" you tease, "we're like a million years away"

"That's not true!" he gasps, "I watch your every move" punctuating each word. God, you try not to make a face. "I have Google alerts on you"

If he was gonna play, so were you.

"Glad to know I have you alerted" with the sweetest voice ever, seeing how his friendly façade falters for a bit at the tone you've used. You laugh, and Pedro takes the chance to laugh it off too.

After the introduction, they ask one of you to keep score, and you offer yourself because, well, you don't trust Pedro.

"I'll go first" you say. "Which was my first ever role in the industry? As an extra during an episode of Stranger Things, as a voice actor in A dog's purpose" you can't help but laugh, "or as a back-up dancer in Hustlers?"

"In Hustlers?" Pedro inquires in disbelief. "You're telling me you were in Hustlers?! I didn't even know you could dance!"

Lies. You and Pedro sometimes put some bachata and dance in the kitchen. God bless Juan Luis Guerra.

"Jennifer Lopez and I are practically besties" you answer nonchalant.

You know the answer. He does too. But he chooses the last one for comedic purposes.

"I'll go with Hustlers. Now that I'm looking at you, you do have a... dancer face"

"It's okay, you can say the forbidden word. I'll take it as a compliment" you laugh, "you're wrong, though. The answer is Stranger Things"

"No way!" and it sounds as if he genuinely didn't know. Good lying son of a bitch; Jim Carrey on Liar, Liar would've been proud.

"Yes. If you look in the background of season two, on this one episode where Nancy and Steve appear to have broken up during a halloween party, you can see me drinking from a cup on a corner"

"That's so crazy"

"Yeah, I was twenty already, yet playing a highschooler" you giggle. "Wow, time flies by. Anyway, we're both at zero. Your turn"

"What film did my dad not let me see at the cinema when I was, uh, ten years old?" Pedro reads from his card. "Rambo: first blood, The Breakfast Club, Day of The Dead"

"I'm going to base this in the year you were born. Okay, so 1975. Let's see" one of the things Pedro loves about you is that you're like a film encyclopedia, but right now, that'll cost him a point. "They all came out the same year, and they were also R rated. Hmmh, I'll choose The Breakfast Club"

Your analysis was just mindless bragging really. You knew the answer the moment he started reading the question, because the anecdote came during a time he heard you listening to the movie's soundtrack ("Did you know that my dad...")

"You complain about Paul all the time, but you're just the same" he comments. "She's a real competitor, people!"

You flush in embarrasment. "Okay, that's one for me. Next question" you read the card in your hands. "What pet do I own? An orange cat named Louis after my favorite singer, a fish, or a Shih Tzu named after my brother"

The orange cat lives with you both. You're curious as to how he'll answer.

"You aren't naming a Shih Tzu frickin' Fernando" he laughs, so loud, it ends up catching up to you and the crew. "I'll go with the cat"

"That's correct" you lament. "How would you know?"

As if the damn cat doesn't love him more than he loves you.

"I follow you on Instagram" he defends himself. Clever. "We are, um, what do you call it-"

"Oomfs"

"I'm not gonna try to pronounce your made up language. Okay, my turn. Which of these characters I've played in Saturday Night Live? Naughty daddy, protective mom, or weird uncle who has a creepy sneeze" he reads out loud in a confused tone.

This is easy. It was all over your timeline.

"Protective mom" you answer on a beat.

"This isn't fair, that was really popular!" he complains.

"It's still two for me and one for you" you mock. "Now, what is the nickname the internet has given me? I won't give you clues because it's an easy one"

"Easy? You said we were million of years apart and now I'm supposed to know?"

"Well, you seem to manage Instagram so I think you'll be just fine" you tease, and Pedro just wants to rip that smirk off of you. So he caves in first.

"It's people's princess"

"What?!" your eyes grow comically large, shimmering with betrayal as you shout with an incredulous tone. "I can't believe you know" more like can't believe you said it.

"You're royalty! How am I supposed to not know that, internet darling? Besides, told you: I keep my eye on you" and he winks.

This motherfucker. Oh, he's totally sleeping on the couch tonight.

"Talk about internet darlings" your snarky tone comes out, and Pedro knows he's pissed his competitive wife off. "I guess we have a tie. Your turn"

"What are the initials of my full name?" his brows furrow. "I forget. JBPP, JPBP, JBPP"

"José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" you recite. "B, of course"

"But that's too easy, everyone with Google knows it!" but then he's leaning into your ear, whispering in a very low voice to make sure only you hear. "I'll let it pass, though. Love hearing you pronounce my name, mami"

Your face grows obscenely red. "I'm back ahead. Let's see if you can keep up. Okay, here it goes" you read the card, "what is the director I've stated I want to work with? Greta Gerwig, Pedro Almodóvar, or Quentin Tarantino"

"Pedro Almodóvar, no? You said you were jealous I had already worked with him" he playfully nudges you. Too much contact, face hot again. Maybe in group interviews you'll do better, because right now, you're doing a rather poor job at controlling yourself, even as an actor; you can already picture your agent pulling her hair behind the cameras.

"It's Greta Gerwig, actually"

"What?! No way, you told me this!" he grumbles. "This game is rigged"

"Don't get me wrong, I'm still jealous. I just think working with Greta Gerwig is peak womanhood, and I gotta live that. So, Greta, if for some reason this silly video gets to you, call me. I promise I'm not that childish"

"She is" Pedro slips in, "don't call her. So unprofessional" in a mocking exaggerated tone.

"Whatever, you sore looser. Me three, you two. Next!"

"Fine. Which of these songs would I have played at my funeral? My Heart Will Go On, Purple Rain, Nothing Compares To You"

He looks at you, silently pleading you to not answer correctly. Your competitive side screams in agony.

"I have no idea. Why do I feel you've already said it somewhere, though? I'll go with Nothing Compares To You, because the first its too corny for you and the second too epic"

He scoffs, amused at the fact that you did obey, but at what cost? Pedro's well aware his princess can get as competitive, if not worse, than Paul.

"You're saying I'm not epic enough for Purple Rain? Too bad, because that's the answer" you grunt, crossing your arms. "That's right, I am cool enough to have it played. I guess we're tied again!"

"No, you don't loose a point. It's still three to two. This just gives you the opportunity to tie"

"W-wait a minute"

"Settle down" you pat his thigh, "you can still try, handsome"

He gulps when your hand meets his skin, despite the layer of clothes. It's still something that gets him on edge, no matter the years you've known each other. And handsome? You came here for blood.

"Okay, here's your chance: what image of me became trending topic on twitter? An image of me eating a typical dish from my country, an image of me watching Deadpool and Wolverine with glasses while Hugh Jackman's shirtless scene reflects on them or C, me meeting Taylor Swift at the backstage of the Eras Tour"

"The typical dish is tempting" he muses out loud, "but I'll go with the Taylor Swift one because that sounds like something that'd trend"

"You're right" you throw your card. "I'm not complaining though. Best day of my life"

"Does this mean I'm winning?" he beams excitedly. "Oh, in your face Paul! I will finally win something!"

"Slow down, cowboy. There's still some left"

He purses his lips. "Let me have this one thing, would you? Guess not. Here it comes" he starts to read his card, "At school I competed in state competitions, in which sport? Soccer, lacrosse, swimming"

"Swimming" you answer hastily, trying not to think on Pedro wearing tight little swimsuits, as you've only seen him wearing swim trunks.

"Okay, that's dissapointing. Please continue"

"I participated in which play while I was in highschool? Hamlet, The Iliad or Much Ado About Nothing"

You doubt he remembers. The only time it ever came up, was when you visited your parent's house and a photography of you during said play was showed to him by your dad.

"The Iliad, right?" you laugh. The answer is wrong: It's Hamlet. "What? I swear it was that one! It's just you have very..." beautiful is at the tip of his tongue but he refrains himself, "...very greek features"

You can't help but laugh.

"Why of course! This is a face people go to war for"

"I agree" your heart skips a beat, "but I don't think I'll make it that far, if we talk about a war"

"You big fat liar!" you slap his arm playfully. "You've played all sort of characters, from soldiers of all nationalities and places, and like, superheroes, f*****g Joel Miller, even a DEA agent. You at least learned something!"

"Wow, slow down, this isn't a filmography recount" he jokes. Liar, you mouth to the cameras. "Okay, last one: I became a viral sensation for eating what type of sandwhich in LADbible's snack wars: BLT, PB&J, grilled cheese"

You remember the video fondly. Even your brother had sent it to you, along a text that said: Isn´t this your husband?

"PB&J, I win!" you cheer, instantly getting off the chair to do a celebratory dance. Pedro doesn't say anything, just throwing the cards away while the fondness of his eyes betrays him.

pyramiidsf: i want someone to look at me the way pedro looks at y/n mybritishstyle: guys they're just friends 😭 he's like that with all his female co-stars ㅤㅤann-gell: mybritishstyle me when i'm delusional af mandoshoney: where's that girl that's always betting her grandma??? SHE WAS RIGHTFLKRGJ

"Hello, I'm Paul Mescal. I'm here with my friends from the cast of Gladiator II" Connie and you both raise your palms to greet the camera, laughing when you realize you'd done it at the same time, "and we are going to play a game about how well we know each other for Vanity Fair" the irish man introduces the interview you're filming today.

"Did they prompt you?" Pedro speaks up, "or did you just make that up on the fly?"

You laugh a bit too loud, hoping they cut it off in the editing process.

Paul goes first, taking up a card with the first question written on it.

"Okay. Question: What's my least favorite day of the week?"

"Tuesday" answers Joseph once Paul is done reading. "Oh, you're writing it down?"

"Yeah" he answers.

"You just wrote Tuesday" Connie points out, Paul's card on his legs. You laugh along the rest.

"Yeah" he repeats laughing. "I actually, when you said Tuesday" Yeah, he said Tuesday Pedro adds on the background of laughter. "I was like...I'm gonna give everybody a point for that"

"I think I deserve a point for being observant" Connie complains.

Everyone gets a point and Paul moves towards the next question.

"What was the name of my character in Normal People?"

"Connell" both you and Joseph answer, looking at each other before squinting your eyes playfully.

"Callum" Pedro answers out loud at the same time, and you laugh. He clearly had slept when you played it for a re-watch last summer.

"No, you're out" Paul pokes Pedro next to him.

"Connel" Joseph repeats, and Fred agrees to the same answer.

Paul then asks Connie what's hers after he confirms you three.

"Connor?" she asks, confused.

"Incorrect. Three points" while pointing you three.

"You got wrong" he tells Pedro, "Callum's a different character"

"See? You just don't pay attention when you watch things" you blurt out, stopping yourself before adding the with me. It would be harder to come back from that, but so is this as everyone looks at you, even your husband, subtle panic in his eyes. Where the cameras this close? How long had you been silent?

"It's just, quick funny story" you improvise. "Pedro didn't know much about Paul's career, and as I am a fan, I took the time to show him and recommend him your stuff" Paul smiles. "Clearly, my fanatism didn't rub on Pedro but a girl can try"

He laughs, before saying "So the answer is Connell" and you try so hard to remain normal like the energy hasn't shifted.

"He only plays characters with the letter C in the name" Pedro jokes, chewing on a toothstick he seemingly pulled out of nowhere. More laughs follow, and you are so grateful for how he's handling your little metida de patada.

"What's number one on my bucket list?" he asks next, "and don't look at my answer"

The marker is the only sound to be heard, and then Pedro jokingly tries to take a peek.

"No peeking" Connie berates as Pedro laughs.

"You're not gonna be able to see that" Paul replies in an anyways tone.

You repeat the same joke, before Fred blocks you. "Not you too!"

Paul finishes after a while, Connie commenting it was long. Joseph raises his hand.

"Yes, Joseph"

"Is it to see the Great Wall of China?" he asks.

"No, but it's in that-"

"It's close, isn't it?" you interrupt.

"...family of thought" he finishes.

"It's to go and see something" Pedro points out.

"Okay. Rajasthan" tries Connie. "Go to Rajasthan, for a tour"

"Travel to South America" Paul interrupts with the correct answer, "I've never been to South America"

"I'm from South America" Pedro comments, never missing a chance to shout out his dear Chile.

Paul jokes about him getting three points while the rest of you laugh.

"I was born in South America. 17 points for Pedro"

"I want points too" you jump on the joke. "I know Spanish, so I can take you there and avoid you getting lost, mi querido amigo"

"But who was born there?" Pedro counters, "you get no points"

"I think Joseph is the only person who gets a point there" Paul adds, "because everybody just jumped on the bandwagon"

"He said to visit the Great Wall of China" Pedro protests, "which is nowhere near South America"

"It really is not" Connie agrees.

"Qué gente tan tramposa" you complain. "That's unfair. I remove my offer"

"Think about bucket list, and he came up with travel to bit" he tries to reason Joseph's point.

"And by the way, where in South America?" Pedro questions.

"Don't fight, don't fight" pleads Joseph, the calm one. Fred just sits there, enjoying the chaos.

"I want, any, I want to do a big tour of everywhere" Mescal defends himself.

Pedro doesn't back down. "'Cause it's very different"

Paul starts to get angry too. Jesus, men. Competitive men of it all.

"I know it's very different" making an annoyed face.

"Well, different is nice" you intervene, a hand placing in Pedro's left shoulder. "If you stop giving points for free, I'll come with you to the big everywhere tour"

"Alright" Paul agrees. "When's my birthday?" is the next question.

"February" all of you say.

Joseph struggles with the date first, saying seventh, then fourth. Fred tries with ninth, Pedro with eight, and then Joseph starts counting from one to two. Fred counts from eleven to twelve.

"Second" Mescal reveals. "Point to Joseph"

"Oh my God, you guys are good" Connie mentions.

"That's all my questions" and it's time to move on the next one: which happens to be your dear husband, Pedro.

"Paul is like" he brings up while the toothpick dances on his teeth, "Paul is motivated to catch up on points. He's coming for you" to pick on his competitive side as Mescal looks deep in thought.

"He's coming. He's coming" Joseph repeats as Fred laughs.

"What is my full name?"

"Oh! Pedro-" Paul tries in a blink. "Something, J? Jose? Juan?"

"Pedro Pascal, something, something" says Joseph.

"Nope"

"No?"

"Pedro Maria, Jose Maria Pascal" Paul struggles.

Pedro is about to answer when your voice cuts through the air.

"It's José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" you recite.

"It indeed is!" he says, smiling a bit too much. "She gets a point"

"Jose Pedro Balmaceda Pascal" your husband repeats in a more english-friendly pronunciation, looking at the camera while toying with his toothpick.

"I said Jose, I said Jose" Paul protests.

Pedro shakes his head. "You said Jose, but then you put it-"

Connie takes Paul's side. "You did say Jose"

"But then you put it behind Pedro which eliminate- which disqualified you" he replies.

Paul gets angry. That sore looser.

"That's absolute bullshit"

"Don't worry mate, the game has just begun" you joke, making the man more irritated. "Think you can get ahead of me?"

"Joseph is still ahead, y/n" Paul counters, still irritated. "Besides, wouldn't it be cheating? You can speak Spanish!"

"So? Not like speaking a language allows you to know every person's name Paul" you mock. He just snorts, despite still being half angry. Pedro is allowed to continue, trying not to make a face at yours and Paul's banter.

"The question is, who is my favorite actor?" he reads. As the cast members laugh, he uncaps the marker with his mouth, and now you have to try not to make a face, thinking about those teeth sinking into your flesh.

Quinn raises his hand. "It's me"

"That you're my favorite actor?"

"Yeah. You said that to me once" the bald man sounds sure of it.

Paul tries to think in the background. So do you. How can you not know this? he must've brought it up at least once.

"Do you remember?" Joseph insists.

Pedro finally remembers. "I said you were- I said I thought you were special"

"Oh" he sounds rather dissapointed.

"And special can mean a lot of things" he jokes, laughing by himself. Fred laughs with you as Joseph makes a face, your laughter turning even louder when you notice Paul all moody, trying to get this point.

"Who's your favorite actor?" Paul asks, "I think we just have to shoot from the hip here guys"

"Marlon Brando?" Connie guesses.

"Is it Harrison Ford?" Fred guesses.

"Let's go with Harrison Ford just because he's my favorite actor..."

You can't believe you didn't know this. You've re-watched and watched so many Star Wars content together. He gives you a brief look, knowing you're embarrased at your lack of answer.

"As a kid?"

"He's most influent, yeah" Pedro agrees.

"What job did I have before I became a full-time actor?" is next.

"Dancer. You were a great dancer" Paul aswers. Both Fred and Joseph repeat it, adding he was specifically a go-go dancer.

"Oh, he is" you add. "Videos of you dancing are lovely. Ever thought of getting back in the bussiness?"

He laughs, what appears to be a light blush creeping up his cheeks.

"Sure, darling. When you ask me to dance, I'll be there"

Nobody comments on this, too busy waiting for Pedro to say yes or no to the answer they believe to be right. But he isn't saying it is. Now you remember why.

"Come on, come on, come on" Paul begs.

"Can any of you guys remember?" Pedro pleads.

They insist that he danced in Spain, then New York, then settle with Spain again, even Pedro confirming so. But it still isn't the answer written on the card, no matter how much the boys insist.

"Connie?" he tries. She just looks confused.

"The answer in the card is-"

"Waiter" you answer. "You were a waiter"

Now you have three points under your belt.

"Why do you always say the answer at last?!" Paul grumbles. "You are cheating!"

"I'm not" you laugh the accusation off. "You just can't accept I'm better"

"Si que lo eres" Pedro agrees. "Es divertido hacer que se enoje Paul"

"What did you say about me? It's not fair, you're probably sharing the answers!" he's still adamant on insisting with the supposed cheating issue, making you laugh.

Now it's Connie's turn, who starts with: "How many languages do I speak?"

You put a puzzled look.

"You speak seven, eight maybe" Joseph guesses. Pauls says she speaks french, "but most likely seven"

Pedro points his finger at him. "Once he gets going, he's on a roll"

"Joe's got it" Connie agrees.

"Paul, end this reign" Pedro jokes. He looks rather frustrated.

"And the bonus points" Connie offers. "Okay, bonus, what are they?"

"This is an emperor's reign" your husband adds.

Joseph answers: Italian. Danish. English. Swedish. French. Spanish. Norwegian.

Connie agrees she speaks Spanish, making you jump in excitement.

"Oh, I didn't know that!" you beam. "Wait, does that mean you did get what Pedro and I gossiped about you?"

"What?" Joseph asks.

"Nada" you quickly correct yourself. "Yo no dije nada"

"Not that much. I just speak a bit of Spanish. I mostly dominate my own language, German and English"

"You blew our cover!" Pedro nags, hitting your bare leg, yet its devoid of anger.

"He needs a bonus" comments Connie, surprised at Joseph.

"This is horrifying" Pedro says when Joseph gets another point and a fricking bonus on top of that. "This is a slaughter"

"Oh, for which film did I have a gym built in my garage?"

Both Joseph and Paul answer the question correctly, saying Wonder Woman. The latter is quick to state they both get that point.

"That's one for me" Paul says, then looks at you. "And none for you"

You stick out your tongue at him as Connie reads the next card.

"If I were to take this cast on a vacation where would I take you?"

"Ibiza" answers Joseph. Connie agrees in Spanish, with a cute and excited correcto.

Your husband feels the need to crack a joke at Quinn's expense.

"Somebody was paying attention to Connie Nielsen very closely during the shooting of this movie"

"Okay. What is my favorite curse word in Danish?"

"Fuck" Pedro tries.

"No"

"Nobody is going to get that, Connie" Paul bickers.

"Oh, I don't know any Danish" you lament.

"At least now you know how it feels" Mescal drops, making you snort. You playfully kick him on the ribs with your shoe.

"It's very simple" Connie gives as a clue. "It's the same word in every language"

"Shit" Paul tries.

"Satan" she reveals.

Everybody is laughing in confusion at that, saying there's no way you could use that.

"Vos Satan!" Connie curses.

Now it's Fred's turn.

"What is my weirdest on-set habit?"

"I haven't noticed you do anything weird on set" Paul tells.

"I have" Pedro interrupts.

They all get on a small briefing about what could it possibly be, that it was weird, and wasn't part of his character, as you ponder. It was funny before, but now Paul is behind you by a point. So think fast.

"Yeah. I would say being yourself" Pedro jokes, but surprisingly, it works.

"Me! Five points for Pedro" he celebrates as you all laugh. "Love Fred. Oh, Fred"

"Oh, oh, okay" he moves to the next question. "What is my favorite reality TV show?"

Joseph tries with Survivor and Paul with Alone. Truth is, you don't watch any show of said kind, only vagely hearing about Love Island.

"You and I have talked about reality TV" Pedro reveals, "It's just that we never identified one"

They keep guessing shows that sound like a foreign language to you.

"You know what's offensive? That I'm the second youngest of this cast and I have no idea what are you all talking about"

"She's not to be trusted" Pascal quips, "can't trust someone who doesn't appreciate the art of reality TV"

You huff, annoyed.

"Is it A&E stuff?" Pedro asks.

"Yeah, it's the competitive cheapskates" Fred answers. "It's people that really save money on everything"

Pedro gets the point because he mentioned the A&E bit.

"There's like this amazing guy that made a stew out of fish bones, and I just thought it was incredible" he shares. Then, moves to the next question. "What is my go-to crafty snack?"

Nobody remembers eating snacks on set, and Fred gives the clue that it's a drink. Joseph says it's a smoothie, and he does remember it but it isn't the answser.

"I'm thinking of something specific. That Emerge-C that you put in the water"

"Oh, that's very good" you agree, so does the rest, even discussing the best colors

"Who in the cast would I ask to bail me out of jail?"

Everyone even Pedro agree its him. Everyone gets a point, yet Joseph remains ahead.

It's Joseph's turn. "What is my favorite sport?"

"Skateboarding" Paul is so quick to answer, earning him two points for both being correct and time.

"What celebrity do I get mistaken for?"

"Daisy Edgar-Jones sometimes" says Mescal. Of course he had to bring her up.

"No, she gets mistaken for me" Joseph jokes. "Yeah, poor Daisy. But I'm writing it down"

"That was the two letters?" Pedro notices. Still, no one gets it.

It's fucking Justin Timberlake. You'd never guess that.

"What is my favorite film franchise?"

You've probaly named all the existing franchises to no avail. You think fo your dad, a huge geek, trying to remember if there is one missing.

"Oh- Lord of the Rings!" you both answer with Paul at the same time.

"C'mon!" his celebration is short lived when he realizes you tied to him.

"What is my favorite British slang word?"

Pedro says it can't be said, but Quinn insists they can, even adding it's his favorite one too.

"We can say bad words? We can say-?" but the camera beeps over it.

The answer is Bellend. What even is that? Joseph feigns sadness and Pedro keeps apologizing, even as you sit on the chair.

"Okay. I'm last"you wiggle your eyebrows with interest. "Let's see. Okay, first question: what did I take from the Gladiator II set?"

"You took something?" Joseph asks on disbelief.

"Why wouldn't I take something?"

"Is it like an item or memorabilia?" asks Connie.

"It's an item" you uncap the marker, scribbling down the answer.

"It's a short word" Fred points out, but still can't provide a guess.

"You took the rings home" Pedro answers. You snap your had on his way, probably obvious. "What? You told me" he says.

Of course Paul complains. "Hey, that isn't fair! He knew the answer before!"

"Well, if you payed more attention to me, you'd know it"

Lies. Pedro knows because it's sitting in the jewelry box inside your house.

"See? I do pay attention" Pedro playfully hits Mescal.

"I could pay you more attention" he looks at you.

"Alright, then do. Ready? Next question: what is my go-to movie? Oh, this is a good one. I'm always changing it, but most of the time I end up choosing the same one"

They all give you a puzzled look as you scribble.

"C'mon, guys! I've said it on interviews before too. Paul?" the man shrugs. "Thought you said you'd pay me more attention. Heads up, you're doing a terrible job so far!"

"Hey!" he protests. "It's not fair if the answer's changing. Give us a clue"

"You didn't give any clues to yours!" you giggle. "Besides, I don't want you to win"

"Hey, that's against the rules!"

"I'd say it depends on the season" Pedro speaks up. You quirk an eyebrow. "Like, if it's changing, I don't think your Christmas go-to movie is the same as your summer one"

"Actually" you smile fondly, "that is true. On summer, it's Mamma Mia. So I suppose, if you can't guess the one, that'll do"

"No" he smiles, cheeky. "I know it too"

"Yeah?" you challenge, "what is it, then?"

"It's Thelma and Louise" he answers, and your heart beats fast.

"How do you know?" Paul inquires. "Somebody was paying attention to Y/n L/n very closely during the shooting of this movie"

Ah, his joke from earlier. Joseph giggles behind him. Karma, he supposes.

"She said it on an interview, guys. C'mon, learn your sources!"

"Okay" you clear your throat. "What movie got me into acting?"

"Thelma and Louise" Joseph tries.

"No" you laugh, "you're just recycling the answer"

"Is it an old or modern movie?" Connie asks.

"Hmh, old" you pause, "just not... I don't know if you'll ever guess it"

"Is it a Pedro Almodóvar film?" you shake your head. "What? You're always mentioning him!"

Pedro looks into your eyes amid the others' discussion, and you can tell he remembers the conversation.

"There isn't one"

You smile, chest pounding at his soft tone.

"That's correct"

"A trick question?!" Paul yells. "I quit"

"When there's just one left?" you tease.

"Yes, because you've been hiding it all the time but no more" he counters, pointing both you and Pedro. You feel the space getting smaller, breaths going from even to noticeable. "You are sharing answers"

You try to make your breath of relief pass as a chuckle.

"I'm not even gonna win, relax. And drop the charges, please. Loose like a man"

"You didn't explain it though" Connie speaks. "What did Pedro mean?"

"While I have many movies that are inspiration to me, they aren't the reason I chose this path. I did it because I saw an Oscar's ceremony when I was 11" you explain fondly, feeling warm at the memories. "I still remember when they handed the award to Diablo Cody for best original screenplay. I don't know, man, it moved me. What it meant for young artists who came from nothing. I guess I wanted, one day, to be the one standing there, for other dreamers to see it's possible"

"Wow, that's beautiful" Connie says.

"Thank you" you get flustered. "Suppose it was worth it, you know, to do interviews about not really knowing my cast mates" and laugh.

"How does Pedro know, though?" Joseph asks.

"We talk a lot" you clear your throat. "Last one: what indie horror movie did I make a small appearence in? I'm feeling generous because it's the last so I'll give you a clue. It's a Stephen King adaptation"

Paul is the first to speak. "You where in a-"

"Yeah but it wasn't such a huge role. Don't make yourself any ideas"

"I have no idea" Connie surrenders. "Other clue, as in how many words?"

"It doesn't even have any words" you laugh. "You give up? It's 1922. Was an extra as well. Made me think Netflix had my name highlighted in the extra call sheet, because I did so many minor and background roles during that year. Grateful, though, because now I get to be Rome's empress and not fortune teller or highschool #6"

The interview ends, and the camera may or may have not captured the last seconds, Pedro's gaze fixated with you the entire time.

elysyannemimi: we all saw that right? GET PEDRO AND Y/N IN A ROMCOM ❗THEIR CHEMISTRY IS INSANE❗ at0michips: love paul and y/n so much 😭😭 gimme enemies to lovers RN ㅤㅤbobgirllll: at0michips wait what if paul and y/n are secretly dating 😳 ㅤㅤann-gell: bobgirllll quick question are u dumb unhing3dprincess: i bet my grandma they're married. it has to be. trust me ㅤㅤstarlightt180: unhing3dprincess BESTIE U ARE BACK

You arrived in London today. The premiere will be in a few days, and things have been, well, hectic.

Lux couldn't stop talking all the plane ride, but your mind kept going back at the email your manager had sent you before you had boarded the plane.

It's catching upon you, read the haunting message. Attached below, a TMZ article that claimed a regular church attendee had seen you both getting married. It also used a lot of the noise fans had been making on social media, connecting dots or just hyping up the undeniable chemistry. It ended with a little paragraph saying it was obvios, and they're just hoping you'd confirmed it.

You came to realize you didn't care about it anymore. Sure, the pushing around annoyed you, but the thought of still keeping your marriage under wraps feels pointless now. Why wouldn't you shout to the world how in love with your husband you are?

Yet, when you arrive at the hotel, you keep the same protocol of arriving after Pedro, who has already checked in with two keys, claiming its for him and his sister, while you ask for the key to Lux's actual room. After you swipe cards with her, you head over the room you'd be sharing with your husband.

His face appears in your frame, everything happening quickly.

"Get inside. Now"

Your body is dragged inside the hotel room, not even giving you time to swipe the key for yourself.

"Pedro!" you exclaim, between surprised and confused. "What the hell is your problem?"

"Did you read it?"

"What? The article?" your tone is filled with annoyance. "Yes, I did. Why?"

"What do you mean why?" he snaps, voice raising higher. "Don't play dumb with me. You know fans have fuelled the rumors, and tabloids have started digging every corner in fucking California"

"So, what? You're acting as if people finding out is the worst thing in the world" you roll your eyes.

"It is, yes!" Pedro bursts out, caving in to the stress.

It feels like you've been hit across your face.

"Excuse me?" you seethe, hurt etched all across your features. "Would it be the worst thing in the world to admit you're married to the person you supposedly love the most?"

"I love you, y/n. It's just-"

His voice softens, trying to reach for you, yet you pull back, his hand falling to his side in an akward manner. He sighs in frustration, running a hand through his hair as he sits on the edge of the bed.

"I love you" he repeats, sounding much more sure this time.

Your frame seems smaller as your voice comes out hoarse, filled with emotion, appearing to be in the brink of tears:

"Then why do you act like you're embarrassed of me?"

He hates himself for making you feel this way, making you think things that aren't true.

"I don't. Never" he emphasizes. Then, tries to reach once again when you move a little bit closer to him, recognizing that's your way of letting him know you're ready. "You're the most precious thing in the world to me, don't ever think the opposite" then he sighs, heavy. "I'm just scared"

You silently ask him to explain, rubbing his thumb soothingly across his tattoo.

"You're so young, and I'm, well- I know we're aware of it, but people are cruel and the press is ruthless. I don't want to see your name dragged across the mud because you decided to marry me. Your career is starting, and I'd never forgive myself is something happened to you because of me. Not trying to make this about me, yeah? But this industry is fucked up. You've work hard to get to where you are, and it'll be unfair if you'd loose it. I'm scared because us..." he wavers, words trailing off. "I want us to be. I wouldn't want to live in a world without you, i-it would kill me not to have you be my wife"

You desperately want to kiss off the worry on his face, but let him finish.

"N-not saying our love is weak, or anything! That a couple of opinions or tabloids will- you know? Just, I-I don't want them to break us apart. Mi vida, you're the light of my life. Please, forgive me, I-"

He feels his throat closing up, words failing to come out. You sense the grip on your hand to be stronger, immediately letting loose of it.

"Hey. C'mere" your voice is tender, allowing him to bury his face in your stomach as you comb his messy curls with your fingers. "It's okay, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere"

He lets himself melt under your touch, his mind loosing itself in the soft of your digits and your perfume up his nostrils. He's again breathing normaly, hands now hugging your waist.

"There you go. Better?" Pedro nods, still not being able to talk. "That's okay, take all the time you need. We have all day"

"Do we?" he raises his view, his eyes soft yet there is something else to the brown shade.

You hum as to nod. "We agreed to join Lux for dinner. It's barely 1pm"

"Tell me you're thinking it too" his voice cuts throughout the air, boucing off the tapestry on the walls.

You laugh, nervously. "I don't think I do"

"Hmmh, I see" he stands up, towering over you. "You sure you don't?"

"You sure you want this?"

Before you know it, his lips capture yours in a passionate kiss, cutting off all words to be said. What a waste of air, anyway. You are quick to reciprocate, whimpering against his lips.

Pedro picks you up like you're as light as a feather, his arms flexing as he carries you and places you on the bed, frame hovering over yours. He breaks the kiss to breath, but you're pulling him back in, his hold on your hips tighter and the wet spot in your panties wetter.

"Look at you, pretty baby. So needy" he whispers against your face, hot breath lingering above your lips. "And mine. Mía. Only mine"

"I am, yes. Yours only. Need you so bad right now, papi" you answer in a rush. "Now shut up and fuck me"

"Con gusto" he chuckles darkly, "gotta keep the wife happy"

"Happy wife, happy life" you recite, stripping him off of his plain shirt, revealing his toned torso, bulging biceps defined by the movements. You gulp. "Fuck, papi. Gotta thank Marvel for this. I love all of your versions, but I can work with this too" you dreamily stare at him, your hands cupping his face.

He strips the rest of his clothing, but a cute blush adorns his cheeks.

"Yeah, well, it's Scott's fault too"

Your impatient fingers reach the middle of your panties to rub your clothed pussy, letting out a sound that darkens his hazel orbs.

"Fuck that guy" you mutter. Pedro laughs.

"Thought you said you loved the guy"

"Until I learned what he said about your body" you groan, still rubbing. "Connie told me"

His hands now travel to remove your clothes, almost ripping them off.

"Who cares? I just want to fuck you now" he breathes out, practically drooling at the sight of your damp panties. "Lemme take this off too"

He unhooks your bra, seeing the hard nipples. The urge to lick them is so bad, but his desire to fill you silly to the brim is stronger.

You see his hesitation, which is why you grab him by the neck to pull him in for a kiss. He kisses back fiercely, labored breaths as he struggles to focus on your lips, his wet mouth darting to your jaw, neck and collarbones. His hands roam all over your body, needy.

"Gotta be inside of you, mami. Can't wait any longer"

"Then stop waiting" you plead, tugging at his boxers with urgency.

Seeing you so cockhungry, lips parted and pupils blown wide makes his hard dick twitch with anticipation.

He mutters a labored fuck, aligning himself to enter your sticky folds. Pedro enters your tight pussy with a low groan, burying himself deep inside of you, used to his length by now. You're basically begging for it, nails digging and eyes supplicating.

He can't deny you anything, can he?

A messy whine leaves your widened mouth as you adjust, pleasure mixed with pain.

"Mhmm" you moan.

"Mhmm what?" he mocks. "You asked for it. Now take it, cariño"

He thrusts deeper into you, watching in awe how his dick enters your pussy; it was always perfectly, your pussy made for him.

"You're drippin' baby" his rough voice caresses your cheek. He kisses the are, giving a lick to the sweat starting to form. "S'fucking tight too"

You move your hips towards him, trying to augment the friction. The overstimulation starts to cloud your sense, reducing you to a whiny mess as you grip his steady arms.

"I can't think of anything but you, baby" he confesses between grunts, "filling up your pussy to the brim, you dripping with my seed for days"

You moan at the filthy words.

"Love how you take my dick, amor" stretching you as Pedro moves in and out. "S'made for me"

"Yes" you moan, skin slapping sounds bouncing off the walls. "Fuck, I love your dick..."

His pace picks up, and it comes to a point where he's just fucking you silly, his grip on your hips surely to leave a bruise as you keep spilling obscene sounds of pleasure from your lips.

"Your pussy's mine, yeah? No one else gets to have you like this"

"N-no, just you, Pedro. My h-husband" you manage to squeeze, more moans vocalizing the pleasure you felt with each thrust, his big dick inside of you moving in a a steady rhythm, making your eyes roll back further and orgasm closer.

Your breasts bounce with each thrust, and he finds impossible to resist the urge anymore, licking the sensible skin and hard nipples, your hands moving to his back, scratching him harshly, both chasing your release.

"Please!" you whine out loud, not caring how desperate you sound.

Harder. Faster. Rougher.

But your husband knows you, so he indeed starts to fuck you harder, heavy breaths and slippy kiss noises hanging in the spaces between each thrusts. He pants with every motion of his dick, a knot forming on his belly.

"Shit, baby. I think I'm gonna cum. Gonna come so hard"

"Do it. I'm on birth control, remember?" you groan, feeling your high approach as well. "Fill me up, please. Give me all your cum"

Your bodies move as one, precise thrusts hitting exactly that sweet spot of yours repeatedly, chasing your orgasm. For a brief moment, your eyes lock with his and then he's saying:

"I love you, y/n. So much"

Your heart skips a bit, his dick twitching inside as his gaze glimmers with adoration and possesiveness, teeth grazing your skin with marks for him to call you his.

"I love you too, Pedro. More than you know"

A final thrust is delivered. Fuck, feels so good you think you hear him say. Just like promised, he fills you with his release, shots of his thick, warm cum inside your sticky walls. You follow soon, back arching, toes curling, and both head and eyes rolling back. Pedro falls on top of you, his broad body collapsing over yours, as you both pant hard, trying to steady your pulse and breath. He then removes himself and positions you to be the one on top now, lazily throwing the covers over your bare bodies. We need to shower, you said, but he argued you'd do it later before going out.

"I needed that" and you happily hum in agreement at your husband's dragged out words.

Your head falls and rises, with the movement of his chest, silence settling on the previously filled with sex noises room. That until he speaks up:

"One day, I'm gonna fill you up so good until you have my babies, mami" he murmurs, just then realizing what he said. But you snuggle closer, hand and legs drapped over his bare body. You look at him closely, seeing nothing but certainty on his eyes.

I choose you. I'll always choose you.

"Whatever it is with you" your nose brushes his, a small sweet kiss on his lips, "I want"

His eyes shine, probably with tears or the glow of affection.

"Let's do it"

"What?" you look into his eyes for any sign of doubt, bull all you see is love. "Pedro, are you serious?"

He nods. "Wouldn't you want that?"

You feel the corner of your lips pull up.

"Never have I wanted anything more"

poppysplayground: Y/N AND PEDRO RED CARPET DEBUT AT THE LONDON PREMIER OF GLADIATOR II WTF I JUST WOKE UP ptwt is in SHAMBLES mostannoyingbillioner: UM HELLO pedro showing up with two hot women on his arms LUX GIMME A CHANCE pompeiianbollockr: WAIT WDYM THEY ARE MARRIED?!??! ALL THIS TIME?@?#? HOW???! NEED BIGGER CAPS TO SCREAM I'M GOING INSANE at0michips: that article better come out now or i'll burn the TMZ building ann-gell: not me thirsting for a married man 😭😭😭 how they kept this a secret for so long?? we should've noticed ㅤㅤunhing3dprincess: ann-gell i did. knew betting my grandma was the way all along ㅤㅤpyramiidsf: i'm gonna start betting my grandma too

cr: divider @kodaswrld / gif @trashcora

[nyxsteaparty]

#⠀YOU⠀X⠀HIM⠀:⠀NOW⠀TRENDING⠀!

IN WHICH you don’t know who started it — but now everyone is convinced you’re dating him. how does he feel about these allegations?⠀(pre–relationship).

~300 words each saja boy, mostly for my own enjoyment, my characterization only :3

𝐉𝐈𝐍𝐔

ㅤㅤㅤㅤhe’s absolutely mortified, and there’s almost something pretty about the way he absolutely panics. absolute ‘oh no they found out! wait, there was nothing to find ’ energy. it started with a photo of him leaning toward you — only to whisper, he swears on it. he didn’t mean to stand to close, to have his eyes linger on you for far too long. but he did, and now there’s a hashtag of a mash of your names together, and hundreds (maybe thousands?) of edited photos. he doesn’t even understand how the fans noticed. he surely didn’t.

now it’s all he can think about. the first post he saw, he physically dropped his phone. it hit the ground like a brick, heavy, loud, and disruptive. the others pause. “.. you okay?” abby had asked, eyebrow raised like he’s more curious than concerned. jinu hummed affirmatively bending strangely to pick up the phone with a forced smile on his face and an urgency of someone who was being chased by a serial killer. “fine. totally fine.” he’s the complete opposite of fine.

how is he supposed to face you after seeing all of those tweets? he doesn’t know. but what he does know that his latest search history has been .. weird. weird enough that if anyone opened up his safari they would immediately know what was plaguing his mind.

‘how to delete trending hashtags?’

‘did (name) notice jinu looking at her??’

‘signs that they think about me romantically’

he tries to forget about all the shipping. try to look at you in a platonic light again. but the universe had other plans. he can’t open any of his devices without being bombarded with those posts. an au where you two are exes getting back together, a slideshow of nearly every picture of you two near each other’s proximity. there’s even a whole poll deciding who fell first. and eighty–eight percent of the people who voted went ahead and voted for jinu.

he wants to argue and deny everything, he really does. but then he looks over at your way and, oh, the place where his heart should be flutters in the stupidest way possible. in a way a demon like him probably shouldn’t be able to feel. oh, he thinks. they’re right.

𝐀𝐁𝐁𝐘

ㅤㅤㅤㅤhe named the damn ship. as if he wasn’t already the biggest contributer to it — no, he named it too. like it was his own child. instead of something normal like ‘abby(name)’, it’s something way worse. everything abby does near your proximity just makes the ship grow and expand it’s fandom even more.

tugging you away from paparazzi, making you wear his beanie out in public just because it ‘looked better on you’ — and your staff doesn’t help, posting pictures of the two of you behind the scenes (though you’re just talking, you know, like normal friends do). most are blurry, yes, but the fans have eagle vision.

he thinks it’s funny. cute, even. you brought it up once. as a joke — “we’re trending again. gonna feed into it?” he blinks like he’s gaining consciousness for the first time. “should i? no, yeah, we should.” you think he’s just joking. you realize that you’re dead wrong when he brought out his phone and wrapped an arm around your shoulder — suddenly your hashtag blows up because someone decided to actually post the selfie. if he had a pr team, they would hate abby’s guts. or abs.

no, he has no shame. his likes are public (because he isn’t aware you can make it private) and embarrassingly filled with gym content, fan edits of him, and posts about the two of you. if the fanbase didn’t exist — there’s still abby to show love and support to your pairing. it’s gotten to the point that he thinks you’re playing dumb, because everyone and their mothers knew how hard he tries to make you laugh.

because deep inside, he’s glad that everyone agrees that you’re cute together. if anyone’ll have you, it has to be him.

𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄

ㅤㅤㅤㅤof course it’s trending. he made it trend. the moment fans started noticing your interactions, he leaned into it — just slightly. not enough for you to question him, but enough for hardcore fans to notice immediately and go batshit crazy. your manager rubbed her head and mumbled something about ‘pr nightmares’, but does romance care? no, romance only romances.

he times things so perfectly that you have to admit that if you didn’t know any better, you’d think you were in a ‘secret relationship’ too. you’d post a selfie of you wearing red and suddenly he’s posting “red looks good on you ♡” on his twitter. he’s so .. subtle in a not–so–subtle way. when confronted in interviews, he gives vague answers. “they’re very dear to me.” he once said, head leaning on the palm of his head. “like family?”, “like the moon is to the tide.” he’s always been smooth like that.

he knows exactly what he’s doing and lives for the thrill of it. except — well .. sometimes, he forgets it’s supposed to be for show. romance enjoys the attention, the fan’s screams. but most of all, romance loves the way your mouth twitches as you try not to smile at an overly corny pick–up like he used, the way you shove him playfully backstage after another interview.

the fans say you’re a visual match made in heaven. he agrees. not because you’re pretty (you are), or because it benefits his image (he could care less, really) — but because he likes the idea of being paired with you, someone who grounds him.

“you’re not actually into all this shipping stuff, are you?” you scoff, bumping his shoulder with yours. he chuckles. “aren’t you? i already planned out our entire marriage.” the thought of it is .. dangerous. but so is he.

𝐌𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐘

ㅤㅤㅤㅤhe never really acknowledges it. but he’s seen the it. the little fancams slowed to hell and back just to show the two of you making eye contact for a split second. the fans catch everything. it unsettles him how right they might be. mystery never intended to give them material. it’s just the way he looks at you. but he’s confused — not because he doesn’t know where the ship stemmed from, but because they were only noticing his behaviour recently.

you ask him about it one day, phone showcasing a video of you in the center, with him staring (question mark? can’t really see his eyes) in the background. he takes one glance, “pictures.”, he answered with a shrug. he plays dumb really well — too well. you genuinely thought he just didn’t know what shipping is. but he totally does. “you feed the fire.” he tilts his head innocently. “didn’t know there was a fire. a lie. he figured out how incognito mode works just to read fanfics of you two. out of curiosity at first, but then it became a small habit he gained.

but you don’t know any of that, obviously. what you do know is that he stands unusually close to you at events now, and you swear you can feel his hand on the small of your back to guide you whenever you happen to walk in the same direction. he doesn’t exactly bark like they say he does (not in front of you, anyway), but he can and will growl. there’s something animalistic and protective about the way he hovers like second nature — like right beside you is where he’s supposed to be.

mystery stays completely unbothered. if the fans want to talk, let them. if they just so happen to post ship edits of you two with his new favourite love song, that’s fine. great, even. at least the world already knows you’re his.

𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘

ㅤㅤㅤㅤhe hates it, he needs every video, picture and post deleted and burned to ashes. there could be a video of you handing him a water bottle and there’d be a comment saying that he’s, quote, ‘down bad’. down bad for what? hydration? every time those videos happen to unfortunately come up his for you page he instantly groans like it’s instinctive. baby just doesn’t get it. he looks like he tolerates you at best. that’s if he even looks your way. (that’s what he tells himself.)

he has a private account where he just .. watches. videos he’d see slowly went from mukbangs to that horrid mishmash of your names. he views them. not because he enjoys seeing them .. but for research purposes. he has to know what to avoid, right? “.. you’re not even my type.” he said mid–watch, to no one but himself. why is he talking to himself? fuck. he shuts off his phone and throws it across the bed. it lands on a pillow, still playing that edit of you that got two million likes.

this revelation starts to affect how he talks to you. or, more accurately, how he doesn’t. baby doesn’t talk to you for two days. three. for preventative measures, of course. he doesn’t do ‘crushes’ — it’s some social construct he stopped believing in the moment he became a demon. except he’s dodging you like you’re garlic and he’s a stereotypical vampire. the only thing he can say in your presence is a lame, “your shoelaces are untied.” while you’re wearing something that doesn’t even have them.

you still checked. he’s doomed. and worst of all, it’s public knowledge now. fuck the imaginary shoelaces, it was whatever he had left of his soul that came undone.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ⠀ㅤㅤㅤ©ㅤ@ nyxsteaparty .

[rcmclachlan]

I'd love to hear Dana and Nico discussing Tommy's latest bout of insanity with a probie if you're up for it

"... appears the LAFD helicopter is now leading the Army on a chase..."

The very moment KTLA reporter Chris Wolf says 'chase', the entire hangar erupts into pained groans and shouts of disbelief mixed with fury, plus one enthusiastic whoop that is collectively ignored in favor of the massive white board that DeJong and Goodell rolled out of Captain Ribeiro's office about ten seconds after Kinard escaped with the AW139.

The board is a veritable rainbow of imagination, mostly because it's covered in sticky notes of various colors, and standing in front of it is the most unforgiving authority figure most of the crew have seen since grade school.

"All right, assholes, shut up!" Donato shouts, then consults the board. The hangar falls silent, waiting. "Right now Myers is in the lead with 118 shenanigans, government fuckery, and a high-octane chase, but since Nguyen also bet on 118 shenanigans and a chase that would specifically involve MH-6Ms, Myers, you may have to split the pot."

Myers grudgingly nods. Nguyen discreetly pumps her fist.

Meanwhile, their two-week old probie Mona—who was given the nickname "Idol" after Kelley accidentally pronounced her name as 'Mony' and got the song stuck in everyone's head for days, despite not being old enough to know who Billy Idol even is—takes in the tableau with wide eyes. "Is this, uh, legal?"

"In the state of California? Nah." Nico shrugs, then bites into an unpeeled grapefruit like an apple. "But here? It's fine. You stick around long enough and you'll make some serious cash. Goodell made almost five grand with the cruise ship thing."

Mona stares. "And Cap allows this?"

"Allows it? Who do you think made the first bet?" Nico points to where their illustrious captain is perusing the board with annoyance clinging to his shoulders like a cloak, muttering under his breath.

"Anytime Kinard pulls something like this, we wheel out the board," Dana says, coming to stand on Mona's other side, surveying the pandemonium.

"D-Did you place a bet?"

Nico snorts. "Dane's not allowed to bet anymore. She's dead on the money every time."

"Not every time," Dana demures.

"Okay, but no one could've seen the elephant tusk thing coming." At Mona's wild-eyed look, Nico clarifies, "poacher plane over Channel Island. Kinard brought it down."

With the way everyone's clustered around Donato and the board, holding various sticky pads in the air and waving them around, it looks like the stock market is crashing and everyone's about to dump their shares.

"Oh, speaking of." Dana scrapes at something under her thumbnail. "Did you change the sign?"

Nico says through a mouthful of rind, "I think Donato did."

"The sign?" Mona echoes faintly.

With a nail sharper than any of the steak knives in the communal kitchen, Dana points to the professionally made sign hanging next to the weight room door.

__ DAYS SINCE KINARD LAST TAUNTED GOD.

The '32' that had been sitting pretty at the front of it for the last month has been flipped back to '0'.

"T-This happens often enough for a sign?" Mona looks a little dizzy, and Dana wants to tell her that if she can't cope with a co-worker stealing municipal property and pissing off the government from time to time, she's probably not cut out for Los Angeles. But Captain Ribeiro suggested on Dana's last evaluation to keep her often-correct opinions to herself, if only to keep morale high, so she says nothing.

Nico does for her. "Ever since Kinard started seeing Buckley? Yeah."

"Buckley?"

"Human dalmatian and resident heroic dumbass at the 118," Dana explains. "He and Kinard have an on-again-off-again thing going on that threatens the populace on a bi-monthly basis. If they ever do manage to figure out their shit, it'll take out half the city."

Mona squints at the TV, where the AW139 goes into a perfect hammerhead before slipping past the Figueroa at Wilshire with the grace of a shadow, leaving the MH-6M floundering in mid-air, and everyone clustered around the board starts shouting and waving their sticky notes again.

"And this is.... on again?"

"At this point, no one knows or cares. Kinard has always been certifiable; he'd been looking for an excuse to get worse." Dana glances at the TV. The AW139 banks up, executes a textbook barrel roll, and then disappears out of the range of the KTLA's camera.

"Holy BLEEP, did you see that?!" Chris Wolf cries.

"It's a shame I never really got to talk to him much," Mona says, a little forlorn. "I would've loved to learn from him."

Nico turns a confused look on her. "You still can? He's not dead."

"I mean, he's gonna be arrested and fired, right?"

At that, Dana presses the backs of her fingers to her mouth to hide a chuckle. "Oh, Idol, you're sweet. Kinard'll gently bully that out of you when he's back on Tuesday."

[sparklystarrrr]

One shot request:

Word gets out that MC is dating the Vice House warden of Pomefiore, and Vil is NOT impressed. While you may not be officially a member of the dorm as someone close to his second-in-command he can't have you just running around. Whether you like it or not Vil now considers you a representative of Pomefiore.

Queue a disgruntled Vil showing up at the step of Ramshackle with a basket full of care products and a neatly pressed Pomefiore uniform for when they enter the premises. After all it would be poor etiquette to arrive in a slovenly state.

It's especially bad if MC struggles with hygiene in general; never fear though, he will make sure you attain mastery in the subject!

Oh and you get a micro dose of the Epel treatment.

STOPPP this is so good, I've been WAITING to do a Pomefoire oneshot for ages THX SM FOR THE REQUEST ANON!

Simple Touch-ups

Synopsis: As Rook Hunt's partner, it's Vil's job to make sure that you, as his unofficial Pomefoire member, look absolutely parfait!

Contains: Rook Hunt x Gn! Reader, Vil Schoenheit x Gn! Reader (platonic), reader gets the Epel treatment, Vil refers to (y/n) as Potato, Rook uses a plethora of French nicknames for (y/n)

It was rather calm today considering word had gone out that you and Rook were officially dating. Pretty much everyone supported you and absolutely shipped the two of you! It was honestly quite refreshing. You sat scrolling on your phone in bed when all of a sudden the doorbell rang. "Huh? No one told me they'd be coming over, I wonder who it is?"

You hopped to your feet and scurried down the stairs of Ramshackle, opening the door to see Vil looming over you with a large basket cradled in one arm and a black garment bag in his other hand. "Good evening, Potato. It has come to my attention that you're in a relationship with Rook, yes?" He said while slightly grimacing at the sight of you in over-sized pajamas and hair sticking out from every direction, plus the lack of makeup or skin care gracing your clearly exhausted face.

"Yup! Is there a reason you have these... giant packages?" Your eyes scanned between the items in his hands. "They are for you Potato. Now, scurry up to the bathroom. I must fix whatever's going on here." The man dramatically looked away as your current ensemble disgraced his eyes. In the name of fashion and all things beautiful, your outfit was a disaster, even for lounge wear.

He ushered you up to your bathroom as if it was his own dorm and looked around sadly at the minuscule size of the bathroom. "There are seriously no chairs, not even a stool?" He said, clearly shaken. "Yeah... Crowley didn't provide me with much so this is all I have." He nearly fainted. "Well, Pomefoire would never treat a young Potato to such impoverished dormitories and petite washrooms. Now, sit on the counter."

You propped yourself up on the counter and he set the basket of goodies next to you, unwrapping it and taking out everything while explaining them to you in great detail. "This is a toner, you must use it before every product you add onto your face." The bottle was dark purple, seemingly from his own brand. If it was by Vil, it was sure to work.

Along with the toner, he pulled out makeup removers, serums, moisturizers, eye creams, lip masks and balms, ect. The whole nine yards. "You will use these every day. If you need more just give me a call. I'm here to assist Potatoes like you in need of a makeover." You honestly thought he was just calling you ugly in the fanciest way possible, but whatever, getting to work with Vil was practically an honor! Especially since this was your boyfriend's best friend making sure you looked good for him.

"Now, we shall commence the makeover." Pardon..?

It was like he pulled the makeup bag out of his back pocket with how quickly he wiped it out in front of him. "Vil... What are you doing?" You asked skeptically. He looked at you like you were actively growing another head"...You thought the makeover ended there? Don't be silly Potato, you will need more than skincare products. Close your mouth so the foundation doesn't crease." He spoke after adding a cool primer to your face. He applied the light weight foundation to your face that was somehow your exact shade.

He held the bottom of your jaw up with his fingers while he patted it into your skin and blended it out flawlessly. "Suck in your cheeks. I must do the contour, blush and highlighter." He pulled out a few pallets and some bottles of blushes and contours and highlighters along with many different brushes and blenders you thought you've probably never seen before. He glided the brush with warm brown contour onto your cheekbones and along the sides of your nose, blending it into your skin with the faint red blush on his brush. He dusted shining white highlighter on the tip of your nose, brow bones, cheekbones and cupids bow. He set in the base with a setting powder that happened to go perfectly with your skin. How did everything match your skin tone so well? That was a question you'd never know the answer to. But knowing Vil's extensive makeup skills and Rook's obsession with everything possible about you, you had a good idea of how.

He muttered a small close "Close your eyes." before spraying your face with a setting spray. While your eyes remained shut he opened a pallet of neutral colored eyeshadows and shimmers. He gently applied warm browns to your lids, adding a dark purple shimmer to the center of them as well. He pulled out a smaller, more angular brush and tapped it into the black eyeshadow, adding it to your upper lash line and stretching it out like eyeliner. "Open your eyes Potato." He then grabbed a lash curler and went straight in. You didn't know what to do when suddenly seeing this new tool that sort of looked like pliers, so you stood still in fear. Luckily it was quick. He grabbed a bottle of mascara and wiped the excess off at the rim,"When I say blink, you blink." It seemed more of a threat than a request when he said it, but you followed his lead nonetheless.

He held the black garment bag in front of you. "The makeup is done. Put this on and meet me in your room." He shut the door with just those few words and you heard his heels clicking to your room. You sighed.'Beauty is... confusing.' You thought to yourself. Hanging the garment bag on the shower rod, you unzipped it. There hung a perfectly ironed Pomefoire uniform. The purple was deep and velvety and the pants were a shining black leather. It didn't have any shoes to go along with it, but you had a good pair of heeled boots that Rook bought you which would look perfect with it!

When putting it on, the pieces were confusing. You didn't know what piece was supposed to be added first or where each accessory went. You tried to remember what Rook's uniform looked like and how he would put it on in the morning when he would sleep over at Ramshackle. At last you came to the conclusion that it would be shirt, pants, that jacket/robe thing, and the wrap belt. Buttoning the shirt and wrapping the little ring holes around your fingers was a lot harder than you expected it to be. How on earth did Rook manage to make it look so easy?! The next step had been much easier. It was simply putting on the pants which you did with ease.

Then came the jacket. You had heard that Epel had a rough time putting it on to this day, so you hoped and prayed that this would just be a him problem and not a you problem too. You were wrong. It was 100% a you problem as well. You practically got tangled in the long purple fabric while trying to make it look perfect, then at one point you gave up. Vil would most likely nitpick at it for you and fix it on his own accord. Putting on the belt was no easier. It was once again a fight between you and the fabric. You felt pity for all the Pomefoire students who had to endure this pain every single day because this was WAY too much for a dorm uniform. It was like a puzzle, and you were absolutely lost doing it.

After a few too many minutes of being stuck in the bathroom and struggling on your own, you decided to get Vil's assistance. You shyly walked down the hallway with the floorboards creaking under your feet. You opened your bedroom door to find Vil going through your closets and dressers, grimacing at the clothes or lack of clothes you owned. You had only your school uniforms and clearly not enough clothes, four or five outfits max. Outfit repeating was an absolute must in your situation. "Potato, we will go shopping another day. This is clearly not enough to last you the rest of the school year. You're practically wearing threads!"

"Yeah, I haven't really had enough money to splurge on any clothes recently. I just need to get by with food and rent, clothes come second. Y'know?" You sighed out, a bit embarrassed at him shuffling through the few pieces you had. He looked at you gobsmacked and leaned a hand against the wall to stabilize himself. "...Are you serious?!" He said between deep breaths. He clutched his heart in true actor dramatics. "Uh yeah..." He shut his eyes to take in this newfound information."Potato, we will go shopping. Tomorrow in the first crack of sunlight. We both know you need it." He quickly shifted his eyes to the uniform on your body that was unfinished in assembling."The uniform has yet to be fully assembled. Why is that?"

"Oh uhm, I just needed some help with the belt.." Your voice lowered in volume as you explained your current predicament. He snorted a small chuckle "I see. Come, I will assist." He walked toward you and examined the whirlwind of a Pomefoire uniform that lay before him. He whisked the leather belt around your waist and tied the golden and red intricate rope around the belt easily. He adjusted the collar of the jacket and black shirt and made it look nice and sleek. "You'll wear this uniform exactly this way every time you step into Pomefoire, are we understood?" He said sharply. "Yeah Vil, but why should I? I'm not a Pomefoire student." You questioned. "Though you're not sorted into Pomefoire, you are in a relationship with the Vice. Therefore making you an unofficial member. You indirectly represent my dorm." He spoke as if common sense while his hands trailed from the collars of the uniform to your hair. He twirled the locks of your (h/c) hair in his fingers while he looked at it in clear deep thought, his brows furrowed.

"We must style this. Turn around for me." You turned around and he got right to work. The man didn't even need a brush to style your hair as perfectly as he was. He carded his fingers down the (h/c) strands of your hair and pulled them back. He pulled a hair tie and a few hairpins from his pockets and began his work of styling. He pulled your hair into a low ponytail and wrapped your (short/long) strands into a bun, setting them in place with a pin every time he wrapped a new piece. He would occasionally move to look at the front of your face and adjust the strands of hair that circled around your face quite messily.

Once he was done he styled your hair as he saw fit. He'd framed your face with your hair perfectly and completed the low bun that made every strand of hair sit perfectly upon your head. When seeing your final Pomefoire look, he smiled to himself. "Shall we go to Pomefoire and show you off to Rook now?" He asked, a bit more cheerful than before when he saw you in your comfy clothes since you now dawned the Pomefoire attire he had made specially for you."Of course! But... do you think he'd like me looking like this?"

He sighed at your lack of confidence like an older sibling, "Why would you discredit my work? He will fawn over it for years to come, Potato. Do think of yourself as lowly as an insignificant worm. Especially in Pomefoire attire. Come along, we are going." He turned towards the front door of Ramshackle, expecting you to follow. In a nervous state of wondering how your boyfriend would react, you followed."Ah, before we embark, let me apply this lipstick to you." He pulled out a wine red lipstick from his pocket and dabbed it on your colorless lips. "Perfect. Now, let's go."

~ In Pomefoire~

Once you stepped into the doors of the Poemfoire living room, you saw Rook keeping watch of the underclassmen including Epel. They'd been having a bit of fun while Vil was out of the dorm giving you a makeover. He'd sat on the plush silk couch with his back turned to you, giggling at the slightly rambunctious freshmen of his dorm. "Hi, my love! How's your day going?" You spoke in a sweet voice while calling to him. He turned around, disregarding what he was previously engrossed in and suddenly the world around him stopped and you were the only thing he could focus on. "Ah, mon amour, tu es très beau! Oh la la~ Magnifique mon cœur, absolutely magnifique!!" He spun you around in the air with glee, his hands firm on your hips as he smiled so big at you.

"Though your beauty as of now is absolutely radiant, I assure you that your style of over-sized lounge garments and messy (h/c) locks is much more endearing to me and ignites a fire in my heart no amount of matches and wood could come close to, mon trésor!" He spoke heartily before pressing a passionate kiss to your soft rouged lips. "Thank you Dear, Vil gave me a makeover before coming over!" You said with a smile while he placed you on your feet again with his hands gripping your waist gently."It was a challenge at first, but (y/n) is quite compliant to my help. They're a true Pomefoire student at heart." Vil said with a small smirk.

It was like Vil said earlier, Rook would be fawning over this look for years to come. He had taken a picture of you in his dorm's uniform and set it as his wallpaper on his phone. He printed it and framed it TWICE, putting it on the wall above his bed and on his vanity. He even put a picture of it in his wallet so that every time he spoiled you again he could see your beautiful face and effectively spoil you more. He made it a point to show every one he could, no student at NRC was safe from the wrath of Rook's undying devotion and love for you, and to be honest, you wouldn't have it any other way.

Can ya'll tell I love talking about makeup and skincare...

[911-incorrect-quotes-dispatch]

Chris: When you and Buck finally get together, would you guys have a ship name? Eddie: We’re not a couple. Chris: Not yet. Do you wanna hear the ones I came up with? Eddie: Against my better judgment, sure, let's hear them. Chris: Cool. First one on the list is Beddie! Eddie: That sounds like a bed covers' brand. Rejected. Chris: Yeah, I wasn't feeling that one either. Ok, what about Buckmundo? Eddie: Somehow that one is even worse. Chris: Lucky for you, I saved the best one for last. What about Buddie?! Eddie: Oh my god. That one's kinda... cool? Chris: Right? All you need to do now is date and marry Buck, and we'll call you buddie all the time when we talk about the two of you.

[toxycodone]

PLEASE! TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT DAISUKE AND A POSSIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. I'm begging and crying, please

ship. daisuke x reader

content. sfw + romantic

an. i have not been reading any other content but I’ve seen the massive complaints of people babying him through the grapevine 💀 so well. hopefully my thoughts are good

We all know this but Daisuke is seriously such a cutie.

Just. He’s so outwardly kind and enthusiastic, so before you two are even dating he’s practically just glued to your hip.

I think before any romance is involved he makes a great friend. He’s inviting you to his house to play video games (his mom makes snacks which is lowkey embarrassing but also pretty cute).

Honestly I think his mom is trying to teach him to be an adult but also like. Cannot stop babying him. Like he’s such a good son could you resist spoiling him?

And it just spirals to you too bc like! You’re the guest! Going to his place is always nice bc it’s like yay! It’s like they practically adopted you. (It wears out tho his mom makes you start doing your own dishes or something and it’s like oh. You’re *really* apart of the family.)

ANYWAYS ENOUGH. but before you two get together. Daisuke’s crush on you is like. So obvious.

He tries so hard to keep it to himself bc he’s afraid to ruin whatever you have right now but. Geez.

He lights up when he sees you and is almost talking a mile a minute—he’s just so excited to be with you and be talking to you!! You’re his favorite person!!!

And he’s always trying to impress you…like, it’s always something so dumb too. Showing off his arcade skills or whatever. He’s silly.

I think he can’t resist blushing when you’re around too. Like. There’s always a nice mauve stain on his cheeks and it’s ADORABLE.

He doodles. He doodles you. The stereotypical initials in hearts. YEAH. When he’s in classes or taking notes he most definitely starts daydreaming and ends up with silly doodles and hearts and crap UGHHH

His sketchbook is where it really gets dumb and crappy and romantic. Which he tries SO HARD TO HIDE FROM YOU ITS CRAZY.

when he musters of the courage to tell you his feelings (there’s a lot of stuttering and crap) he’s fist pumping and going LETS GOOOOOOOOO (when you’re not around but you manage to catch it probably)

He’s such a good boyfriend oh my god. In my mind he really values family and stuff so you are EXTREMELY important to him (and by default his fam)

You have a good relationship w his mom off the bat she ADORES you for how happy you make her son oh my god

He does a lot of stupid romantic shit like…pulls a chair out for you at dates, gives you flowers, tries to write love notes 💞

DUMB THRIFTING DATES WHERE YOU PICK OUT OUTFITS FOR EACH OTHER. UGHHHH DONT TOUCH ME.

But dating you also makes him think more seriously about life. Because he gets waaaaay ahead of himself and is like “oh my goodness,,,I have to prepare and get a job so we can get married and have a giant wedding and buy a nice house and get a pet and” (he’s naming your kids in his mind btw.)

[rinis-rift]

6- Haunting the Horizon

6. Job Hunt (Gone right!)

The Masterlist! | YOKAI FILES | prev.| next

ꕥ Yokai is from Japanese folklore, so what is one doing, wandering around the streets of Korea? Grabbing attention from the other beasts who dwell in their own underworld as well as their hunters? And when the dust settles, who will have the pleasure to have their blessing?

wc: 2.1k

Yokai!Male! Reader x Saja boys + Huntr/x

Extra: sorry for the shorter chapter! i realized smth and decided to space it like this :P + im not entirely sure how to characterize the saja boys but i TRIED PLEASE BEAR WITH ME

In three different homes there were three different atmospheres, one of them had sworn off bathhouses. Two had confirmed a target.

“I saw a guy run with no feet!” Zoey exclaims, her eyebrows furrowed, squaring her shoulders and making crazy arm movements to prove her shock. Mira nodded, though she didn’t see the absence of feet. “He had [h/c] hair and [s/c] skin!”

“Yeah, it's totally the same guy from the other day.. His neck was totally busted, like an owl.”

Zoey visibly gags at what her imagination cooks up with Mira’s vague description, “Eugh! Really?!” Her eyes widened, to them both- it was clear. This was the spirit that doesn’t belong, and now, they had to keep him away from the demons to keep him from being indoctrinated.

“Wait! That means it’s the cute guy from the alleyway—” Her vowels are stretched with a tone of agony. Zoey’s face falls apart at her own conclusion.. Why did all the cute ones have to be demonic?!

Mira nods, although she didn’t entirely get the physical appeal, she will admit that he had style. “Mourn about it later, Rumi?”

Rumi jumps at the call of her name, “Wh– yeah?”, her thoughts were pre-occupied by the obvious tears in the honmoon, it was like an anchor on her that hit the ocean floor, slowing her ship down.

“How do you think we should approach him?”

Rumi wipes her worried look and puts on her ‘leader’ face, a stern look in her eyes as she brainstorms, “Well, obviously, we need to learn more about him, figure out where we can find him. It’ll be hard, but we just need to have him on our side.” It’s vague, but they have no information on him right now.

Mira crosses her arms, less optimistic than the other girls, “Yeah, but what bugs me is what if he also steals souls? Just as heartless as the Saja Boys? We help a monster just to stop another monster..”

“Well.. maybe he’s different? He is from a different realm supposedly after all.. And he hasn’t been stirring anything up- as far as we know.” Zoey theorizes with a shrug with an unsure tone, she thought the same with the Saja Boys initially, but that theory was debunked.

“Did Celine ever clarify what kind of demon he was?” Zoey asked, both said nothing, Celine only described him as an outlier, very vague.

Rumi’s eyes flicker with emotion at Zoey’s suggestion, “A different type…”. Her heart clenches with.. Hope? Uncertainty? Dread? If Zoey’s right, could that mean that there is a chance that they could understand her? 

If they could believe that a supernatural being could be good or at the very least, harmless. Then could they forgive her for keeping her own demonic traits a secret?

“Different or not, if we need his help, it’s all for the sake of the honmoon.” Mira sternly says, a realist through and through.

The conversation then turns into a brainstorm to takedown the Saja boys, diss tracks, 23 notebooks of demon insults, hotter and heated choreography.

Oh, they were excited.

In the abode of the hunter’s enemy, the tallest member with the biggest muscles, on his face was the biggest grin. Not only did he manage to sabotage a hunter, but he got a good look at you.

“We definitely found our guy, though he’s a complete shrimp.” He chuckles, recalling the memory of barely giving you a greeting, “If Gwi-Ma saw him, I bet he’d laugh.” Abby falls back onto the couch with a sigh.

He was amused at how wide eyed you were, barely being able to understand the whole situation. That fucking stupid look on you gave him when he disappeared in a flash of smoke, you were so clueless, a stupid yokai.

“Abby, you think everyone’s a shrimp.” Jinu sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“How are you so sure it's him?” Mystery asks, no challenge in his voice, flat, as always.

“He was like a ghost, maybe it was the lighting but his skin looked so sick. And if you used your eyes through that mountain of hair, you’d notice that you could see through him.” Abby explains, shooting Mystery a diss. Mystery doesn’t say a word about it.

“I saw him too, it seems to be the same guy that Mystery was talking about. He has the darkest of eyes, a bit obvious.” Jinu adds, sitting on a stool, looking thoughtfully on how to direct you towards them.

“Well then it’s settled isn’t it?” Romance pipes up, leaning his head back against the couch pillows. “Why don’t we just hire the damn guy?” Baby suggests, he didn’t want to waste time by actually having to socialize with him. Plus, being hired gave them the advantage of being your boss.

“That just might be the smartest thought you’ve had in centuries,” Abby snorted, Baby doesn’t waste a breath on him, rolling his eyes. Abby’s jabs were nothing new to anyone in the group, it was just his personality.

“Baby’s right, we’ll hire him. For what though?” Jinu asks the group.

The group falls silent, thinking about what excuse they can make and get away with.

“What about a cameraman? He’ll be off screen, on set, and it doesn’t require that much skill?” Romance suggests, his cheek against palm with a lazy lilt in his voice, the members didn’t have a better idea. So by default, that’s what was decided.

This conversation explains the reason why the following events happened the next morning.

“Why do I have to do this?” Romance groans, rolling his eyes to the moon, he was in a disguise. 

“Your idea, you also have the most amount of street charm.” Baby calmly replies, putting the lollipop back into his mouth, swirling the candy with a disinterested look.

“Make Jinu do it!”

“He’s too dorky to pull it off, only you can pull off something like this.”

And with a defeated “Ugh.”, Romance sets off, he was in a disguise. His hair wasn’t a vibrant pink like it usually is, his hair now was the same shade of raven’s feathers, hair slicked to one side. He wore fake glasses in a suit outfit with no tie. Business casual, as the humans would say.

The two members of the Saja boys had been on a look out since the sun came up, stalking and staking out at various corners of the town. And they finally spotted you, walking out of the convenience store. 

You were wearing a casual baggy red T shirt with something printed on it written in English, wearing army green cargo pants, you were holding a notebook, [e/c] eyes glued to the pages, your eyes rolling across the page. It wasn’t pitch black like what Abby and Jinu described, but they put two and two together and concluded it was who they were looking for.

Abby made it sound like you were like five foot four (or around 162cm), but you were almost as tall as him, possibly taller by a small bit. But nonetheless, he runs a confident hand through his hair, amping up his glamour- Baby just gives him a ‘are you done’ look.

You don’t notice someone walking directly towards you until the edge of your notebook is almost touching the person in front of you, you immediately put down your book and look up.

A quick apology sounded from your mouth, “Oh-! I’m sorry.” You give a shallow bow in apology, but the man gives you a kind smile, it puts you at ease. So you flash a nervous and polite smile.

“No worries, say, do you happen to be looking for a job?” Your eyes light up a bit more at the question- yes you were looking for a job!

Romance got a good look at your face, he noticed the subtle bits of warm orange that powdered around your eyes, the little sparkle on your cheeks that was pulled together with a brown eyeliner and a fitting shade of lip gloss. Was this really the monster Gwi-Ma wanted?

You felt so.. Fragile. Maybe it wasn’t the makeup, but something about you and that light in your eyes.. It felt so new, it's been ages since Romance has confronted someone like you. It feels like you haven’t seen the shadows of this cursed world, like you never met a single spoiled soul in your life. 

You nod, “Uh- yeah..!” The man’s smile only softened, “Well, we need some help backstage as cameramans and water boys, if you could, come to this location tomorrow at the time written here.” He passed you a card, you received it with a big, grateful smile.

But then you pause, “Are there going to be interviews…?” You don’t show how you mentally shuddered at the memory of fumbling so many, and you have no confidence that if this required an interview that you’d pass…

A look of surprise flashes across Romance’s face, but he conceals it well- was he that clueless of the human world? “Oh, no don’t worry about that, you’ll have instructors, they’ll explain everything to you.” at his smooth reassurance, you’re happy that this job didn’t require any extra steps.

What a wish come true!

“Ah, well thank you for this.. Opportunity!” You thank him, a slight pause in your words, you didn’t want to mess up the pronunciation in front of a businessman. You’d never live it down if you did..

Romance, in all his disguised glory, flashes a smile, turning on his heel and giving you a half wave as a goodbye. “Well, I hope to see you then!”

You smile and tuck the card excitedly into your pocket, walking to the closest wall and immediately journaling the interaction you just had. An eager swing in your wrist when writing the words, a hopeful shine in your eyes.

The man who approached you, now no longer in a disguise and behind the wall with Baby, watches you with an observant look. He watches you as you used the wall as a desk to write something down, an excited shine in your eyes that he can’t imagine having, being a demon and all.

But then again, you weren’t human either. Yet you looked lively, buzzing with life and brimming with anxiousness to interact with humans of all things. Baby noticed it too, that aura of curiosity that aired out around you, like you’ve been deprived of it your entire life.

You didn’t feel like a demon, no glamour to better disguise yourself, did you even have to? He overheard the silly question you asked Romance, it gave away how oblivious you were to how the world worked, or at the very least, you weren’t familiar with how it worked yet.

You were none the wiser to either of the pastel colored boys who stared intently at your back as you walked past them with your nose in your book. You were going to go find more jobs, but since you were just offered one, you could just mess around for the rest of the day!

After this interaction, you skipped happily towards the station, purchasing a train ticket to go explore the more city-ish and busy side of Korea.

What you didn’t notice was that another Saja boy was standing on the rooftops, watching you as you entered the station. His face was disinterested but it changed when a familiar presence brushed against his hand.

Derpy was happy to see you in high spirits, you also seemed to grow taller than the last time, good for you!

A big blue tiger purrs at Jinu’s hand, the man looks down at his furry familiar, a sliver of a smile could be seen on his lips. The tiger, it recognizes you, sees the same boy who he found crying in the demon realm some time ago, speaking in tongues he couldn’t recognize.

Somehow Jinu senses that, that strangely zoned in look of his tiger, onto you. But he can’t narrow it down to what it is. But what Jinu thinks, just from what he’s seen so far, he thinks little of you. 

As a demon, your limited knowledge of the human world shows evidently through your anxious persona around humans way too easily, but because you were acting the way you were, that meant you probably had no human background. This is your first genuine time on the surface of the Earth.

Blind friendliness should do the trick, you’re easy bait. He looks down at the “Hello Friend!” card that he was originally going to send to the half demon hunter tonight, he folds it into his pocket, ‘Not now,’ he decides.

can you tell which saja boy i fucking DESPISEEEEEE

for romance's business guy disguise, i used aq*a as inspo (fucking hate this guy but im gonna use him just once) + fit inspo for MC

taglist: @tofumiarchives @kaikaikarasu @amery-benson-cvii@the-drowning-dreamer @simp4myself @zomqiez @pluto-tea @the-atticwitch @d3sperate-enuf @reibelhearts @sleep-7372 @tsukimoon-chan @dukeacid @blackstar-gazer

[therealmylesmorales]

Dating Loser!Vi Headcannons

A lot of this was thought about with the homie @ficsonpost-its, kind of a way for us to cope with the ending of Arcane 🙃

And I never cared enough to follow the plot so this is a college!au where everyone is alive and (maybe) happy

Warnings: Vi herself is kind of a warning, masc4masc couple if it matters, maybe suggestive at some parts, some parts with Jayce are inspired by “the blind leading the blind” stuff one tictok

She met you through Ekko. You were his (adoptive, biological wtfever shut up) sister and safe to say, she was borderline obsessed with you. But, she didn’t know how to approach you at first. Her very obvious crush on you was noticed by both Ekko and Jinx so they took it upon themselves to help her out.

To get some extra money, she works at her dad’s bar, The Last Drop. She’s a bouncer and whenever she’s around, people tend to behave themselves. It was a normal night until Vi saw you chatting up a storm to Vander and she immediately started to panic. But it all seemed to go on well, seeing how the night ended with your number in her pocket.

Vi can count all of the friends she has on one hand, one of them being her sister. So safe to say, when she admitted that she somehow has a girlfriend, none of them believed her. Jayce even called her a liar until she pulled up pictures.

Vi was out one day when she bought you both matching boxers. She cherishes them like it’s her most prized possession, next to you and the brass knuckles Vander gave her.

“Vi, what are these?”

”Batman boxers!”

You couldn’t help but match her wide smile. “Why Batman?”

”Cause he’s a fucking goat.”

Vi will full on body slam or suplex you, carefully, on the nearest couch or bed whenever you seem to be minding your business. The first few times caught you by surprise but now, it’s almost a daily occurrence that you look forward to.

Vi’s fashion taste is something you admire; from the ripped jeans to the cropped muscle shirts that she cut herself, you have nothing but good things to say about her clothes. However, in the comfort of her own home, she never wears a shirt. It’s even rare to find her in her sports bra while she’s lounging around.

“It’s nine in the morning, why are your tits out?”

”Are you complaining?”

”Of course not. But Jayce is coming over so he might.”

You can hear her groaning the entire time but she’ll do it.

Speaking of Jayce, it’s never a good idea to leave them alone for too long or else something would happen. Separately, they’re geniuses but together…those brain cells are nonexistent.

“Vi, it’s been fourteen hours, where the hell were you?”

”Oh, I was getting that tattoo I told you about.”

”For fourteen hours?”

”Yeah, Jayce was with me and he thought it was a good idea to get it done in one sitting. He even got something!”

Needless to say, both you, Mel and Viktor always expect something to go wrong with those two. (Have we lost the art of a good poly-ship? Jayce has two hand so just kiss and shut up)

Do not EVER call her Violet, she’ll think you are upset with her and will probably tweak out and cry. The only acceptable names to call her are Vi, obviously, or ‘Pretty Girl.’ You were only a few months into your relationship when you called her that, she spent like 5 minutes in straight silence not really sure how to react; something you did notice was that her face was as red as her hair.

Vi will also lay her complete body weight on top of you when you lay down; it's one of her favorite ways of cuddling. (For my gamer!readers) Especially if you’re playing a game, you will wrap your arms around her with the controller laying on her back. The both of you will stay there for hours.

“Motherfucker.”

”Die again, cupcake?” She muttered into your chest.

“Radahn is ass.”

A little something extra for my black!readers that love Vi 🫶🏾

Say you can’t find your bonnet. You looked all up and down the apartment, pretty much flipping it over but it was still nowhere to be found. And seeing how it was your favorite, you were a little upset that it was gone. Until Vi came out of the bathroom, said bonnet on her head, giving you a small smile, completely unaware of what she was doing.

[lilithschosen]

hey, me, why don't you try to write something x reader finally?

oh hey me! yeah, for sure. early happy birthday, idiot!

LOST DOG (ao3 link) words: 7303 ships: agatha harkness x rio vidal x reader rating: E (NSFW) tags: strap ons, packing, daddy kink, cunnilingus, threesome, ideal eiffel tower ya feel me?

Your beloved couch potato of a dog is lost. You don't even understand how he got out let alone wandered away to the point of being lost. He's an older dog, a black lab with more white hairs on his muzzle than you care to count. So stating that he ran off is a little unsettling. 

You print out fliers with the most recent picture on your smartphone and write all of his names, nicknames, anything you've ever called him on the fliers. As well as your phone number and the most important thing: REWARD. 

You have a modest job, nothing too flashy but something you can afford little luxuries here and there. However, those luxuries would be few and far between if he was found because you would pay through the nose to make sure that hound is happy and safe. 

The thought of trudging through every street in Westview to put up the fliers was a bit daunting, though. You were almost discouraged by doing it until you thought to drop them off at the police station. 

You head down to the station, thick stack of freshly printed fliers in hand, and stand in the lobby. A mustached man sipping coffee gives you a nod as he walks past you, leaving you a bit confused than anything else. 

No one approaches you. 

You chew on the inside of your mouth, still waiting awkwardly in the lobby of the precinct and pat the stack of papers against your palm to calm yourself. 

“Can I help you?” 

You turn on your heels to look at who spoke to you. A woman with dark hair tied into a bun on the back of her head, wearing a white button-up shirt with a leather gun holster under each arm and black slacks. She has her hands clasped behind her back, leaning in towards you with an inquisitive, small smile. Her eyes rake over your body, sizing you up but not maliciously. 

“Oh, h-hi!” You suddenly stammer, having expected some dude cop and not her. You snap out of it and begin kickstarting the speech you've been practicing all day, “I lost my dog and I have some fliers I thought I’d give the Westview PD?” 

You lift the stack up and the woman's eyes never leave yours. She nods, holding her hands out in front of her now. 

“Oh no,” she tuts, shaking her head solemnly, “Come with me, I'll have to take down some information for your file before we proceed.” 

She extends an arm to you, turning to the side to have you walk past her. You do, feeling better now that you didn't have to pitch it like you were expecting. The woman rests her hand on your lower back and guides you further into the police station. 

She directs you into an office with the shades half drawn all around and closes the door behind you. Another woman sits with her feet up and arms across her chest, looking at you with her brows furrowed. 

“I'm Agent Rio Vidal,” the woman, Rio, starts with her hand to her chest. She walks around you and approaches the woman at the desk. She nudges her boots off the desk and clears her throat. “This is Detective Agatha Harkness. We're here to help you.”

Agatha huffs once her boots hit the floor, sitting up in her chair as she pulls at her blue flannel shirt. “So what happened? Boyfriend stole your shit?” 

You blush and look between the two women. Rio sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. “No. She lost her dog, hence the fliers in her hand.” 

Rio waves you forward, and you do, setting the stack of papers on the desk. Agatha turns her head to look up at Rio while reaching forward to snipe a flier from the stack. She sits back in the chair, pulling the paper with her, and smacks her lips together. 

“Fido is lost, huh?” Agatha asks, looking at you over the top of the flier, “Have you tried looking for him? He's only seven, he couldn't have gotten far.”

“Well, yes,” you begin, taken aback by the bluntness of the woman, “His name is Joxer, actually. But yeah, he got out the other day, and I’ve been looking for him endlessly. My apartment is so empty without him.” 

Agatha laughs with an exhalation through her nose when you mention your dog's name. “Joxer. Cute name. Familiar one, some pop culture reference?” 

You nod, eyes lighting up that someone understood it. “Yeah, it's from Xena. He was the goofy friend, arguably a third wheel to Xena and Gabrielle.” 

Agatha’s eyes lift back up to Rio and the two share a knowing look before Rio claps her hands together, smiling at you.

“We'll hold on to these,” she scoops up the stack of fliers while Agatha folds hers into a square and shoves it into her breast pocket, “and we’ll get back to you if and when we get any information.” 

Rio offers her hand, and you take it without hesitation, grabbing onto it with both of yours, and shake it gratefully. 

“Thank you so much Agent Vidal,” she nods at you, head lowered. You look at Agatha and flash a smile. “Thank you Detective Harkness.” 

Agatha waves at you with a brief two fingers off her forehead. She crosses her arms over her chest again, running her tongue against her canine tooth while she watches you. You can't help but feel like she's drinking you in, and it makes your face hot. 

Rio squeezes your hand, bringing your attention back to her. You take your hands back sheepishly, and she chuckles at you. 

“Joxer is a fitting name for such a handsome boy,” she points to the picture of your dog on the papers on Agatha’s desk, “I bet he's a good cuddle buddy too.” 

You nod, beaming at the thought of your dog. “God, he really is! I live alone since my ex and I broke up. He's gone through so much with me so it's nice to not be completely alone after it all.” 

You run a hand through your hair at the realization you started babbling. Rio takes a flier from the pile and holds it out, frowning. 

“I'm so sorry to hear that,” Rio studies the flier and all the information earnestly before looking back at you, “Off the record too, your ex doesn't know what he's missing out on.” 

“Yeah, she sucked so.” 

You give a brief shrug and tight-lipped smile, not knowing how else to react. The wounds were still fresh, but you were healing. Joxer helps with that. 

Rio and Agatha both react the same way with widened eyes in surprise. Agatha coughs to break the tension. 

“Right!” Rio walks back to the door, opening it for you. “We'll be in contact.” 

You nod again at the both of them in your thanks and wave your goodbyes. As you leave, Rio secures the door once more. Firmly ending the encounter between the three of you. 

You make your way out of the precinct entirely and head back to your apartment which is a short walk away. 

You busy yourself with research on what to do if your dog goes missing. You opt to toss the blanket from your couch on the front steps with Joxer’s food dish and a couple pieces of his kibble, in case he's in the area. You try to keep music on in your apartment by syncing your phone to the speaker system you have for your television. 

Bopping along the rest of the evening, tidying up where you can to keep your mind off Joxer, your phone starts ringing, and the music cuts off. You run over to grab it and notice the number is one you don't recognize. 

You answer, holding the phone to your ear. “Hello?” 

“Hey!” Rio says on the other line, “I think I have a lead on Joxer, if you wanna head over here? It’s easier to discuss in person.” 

You jolt to the dish holding your keys, “Yeah of course, I’ll be over.” 

Rio gives you her address, and you jump down the front steps two at a time until you're on the sidewalk outside your apartment. You hurry to your car, starting it, and peel off down the street faster than ever. 

She didn't live far, and your heavy foot on the pedal definitely cut that drive even shorter. You pull up to Rio’s house, opting to park along the sidewalk than in her driveway, and shut off your car. 

You see Rio standing on the front porch in an oversized shirt and bare legs. You blush at the appearance of the agent, but step out of the car and give her a wave. 

“Oh, you got here fast,” Rio says more so to herself than to you, “Anyway, we handed out those fliers and made some calls earlier. He was last seen around your place.”

Rio smiles at you, a warm one that makes the corners of her eyes wrinkle, but you pause for a moment. What did Rio mean by “we”? 

It was getting dark, the streetlights were on and there was no way you should go knocking on doors tonight. You sigh, leaning against your car. 

“Well, I guess I’ll start asking around tomorrow.”

It sucks to have almost had your dog back, but since he's in the area and not in a pound somewhere in the big city you feel a little bit better.

You open your driver side door, defeated, but Rio calls out. 

“You could stay for a bit, maybe someone will call? I handed out a ton of fliers.” she asks with a hopeful tone, “Besides, when was the last time you had company that wasn't just a dog?”

You shut the door, keys clanging against the metal frame of the door. “I guess, sure.” 

Rio grins, biting down on the tip of her short nails as you make your way over toward her. She gives you a once over and flicks her tongue into her cheek. 

“You look comfy.”

You're standing on her front porch in a t-shirt and shorts with rain boots on since they were the only thing close to you when she called earlier. You laugh at your own appearance, scuffing your rain boots on the concrete of the front porch. 

“Well,” you pinch the hem of your shirt and waggle it against your body, “I didn't think I was going anywhere tonight.” 

Rio smirks, “I like it. Come on.” 

She pushes the front door open, revealing soft lights and a cozy living room. Something lived in and loved. Something your apartment lacked, truthfully. 

You step in and kick your rain boots off, leaving them to the side of the front door. A TV is mounted on the other side of the room, paused on the opening frame of a movie. 

“Did you want butter on the popcorn or are you gonna complain I didn't make it right again?” 

Agatha tosses a piece of popcorn into her mouth, crunching happily. She gives a head nod in acknowledgement to you, not even blinking at you in the house as well. 

“Oh, I didn't realize you two lived together,” you say. Agatha plops down on the couch in her dedicated spot, you assume, and holds the popcorn in her lap. “I don't mean to intrude, Rio thought I should stay a while in case someone calls about Joxer.” 

Agatha laughs into her palm, covering her mouth as she continues to eat. Rio shoots her a glare and moves into your space. “Yeah, no worries. Fridays are normally date nights, but we weren't going anywhere.” 

Date nights. 

The two were together. 

You blush harder, embarrassed from your ogling of Rio moments ago. Rio brushes past you and sits on the opposite side of the couch, curling her legs underneath her. She pats the cushion between her and Agatha, looking at you with expectantly. 

“You guys don't mind?” 

Rio shakes her head while Agatha shrugs with indifference. “You can be like Joxer was for Gabrielle and Xena.” 

Agatha winks at you, cutting the tension between the two of you. You roll your eyes at her and settle in between the two women. Agatha offers you popcorn, but you decline and she sets it in front of you all on the coffee table. She rubs her hands against her pajama pants and grabs the remote, starting the movie. 

“What'd I interrupt?” you joke, “Hopefully nothing too good.” 

Agatha spreads her legs apart, sinking further into the couch with a relieved groan. “Some shitty horror movie Rio insisted on.” 

Rio swats at Agatha over you, leaning with one hand on your thigh. As she moves back to sit down, she runs her hand against your leg and pats it. 

“Hope that's not an issue. I love horror movies, Aggie over there thinks they're cheesy.” 

You remain still, staring down at your leg until Rio removes her hand from you. You stammer for a second before responding. “I'm a complete wuss when it comes to scary stuff.” 

Rio holds her shoulder against yours, her voice dropping to a whisper. “Well if you get too scared, I'm right here. Or you can hide by her, but she might not appreciate it.” 

“I do appreciate it,” Agatha scoffs, pulling at the inside of her thigh and shaking her leg as if something was pinching her where it shouldn't. She raises her arm behind the back of the couch behind you. Her fingertips just barely graze at the back of your head. “I just always have to be the safety blanket.”

You cross your legs at the ankle, unsure what to do with yourself. The movie plays on, introducing the main characters as well as setting up the villain. It's a little cheesy, but some of the easily noticed jump scares still get you. 

“God, you weren't kidding,” Rio chirps at you, turning herself toward you on the couch. She rests her arm against the back of the cushion and props her head up with a fist under her jaw. “You really are a wuss.” 

You blush, twisting at your knuckles. “I did warn you.” 

Agatha snorts a laugh, pulling her hand off the back of the couch to pat you on the thigh. “Don't worry, this one sucks. It should be over soon.” 

It was encouraging to some degree, but not as much as you'd rather. You all tune back into the movie during a suspenseful scene. The main character walks slowly down a narrow hallway, only being illuminated by lightning strikes. Just as they make it to the end of the hallway, Rio shouts and grabs you by the shoulders causing you to scream. 

Rio wraps her arms around your shoulder while she wheezes with laughter. Your heart pounds in your ears from the scare, reaching up to grab her forearm across your chest. 

“Sorry, baby,” Rio says through her laughter, squeezing you in her arms, “I couldn't help myself.” 

You laugh along with her for a beat before your brain recognizes she called you baby. Your laughter dies off as you turn your head to look at her. 

She's closer than before. Her body pressing against yours, faces nearly touching. Her eyes flicker between holding your gaze and looking down at your lips. It was almost like she was about to kiss you. 

You turn your head away, focusing on the movie again. Rio sighs, “Thought we had something there.”

She pulls your chin back toward her with a lone finger, booping you on the nose. You fidget more with your hands, swallowing down the lump in your throat. 

“Is this a thing for you guys?”

Agatha shakes her head, knocking her knee against yours. “Normally, no. We don't share.” 

“But, we could share you,” Rio’s breath is hot across your face, lips hovering just in front of yours. “Only if you agree, of course.” 

It's all too much, but you can't find yourself saying no. Agatha’s turned toward you too, but not in your space like Rio. Instead, she's back against the arm of the couch, her legs still spread apart, but watching. 

Rio waits, studying your face before she closes in and kisses you. Gentle. Her plush lips are warm against yours, and you feel butterflies in your stomach.

She breaks the kiss slowly, smiling at you through hooded eyes before she takes your lips again. She opens her mouth against yours and you follow her. Her arms drop from your shoulders, allowing her hands to settle just above your chest with her fingertips hooking around your collarbones. 

Her tongue licks into your mouth, claiming you while her wife watches. It makes your skin itch against the fabric of your clothes. Like you're too hot with Agatha’s gaze and Rio's body against yours.

You feel Agatha shift next to you. Her thigh tenses as she lifts her backside up from the couch then sits back down. You want to turn and look, but Rio keeps kissing you passionately and fast. 

Rio moans into your mouth while her hand descends onto your chest. She takes a handful of each breast, feeling your pebbled nipples against her palm. She bites down on your bottom lip, making you gasp. 

“You're addictive to kiss,” Rio breathlessly states, stealing another kiss. She swirls a finger around your nipple before pinching it through your shirt. “And, fuck, your noises, they're so pretty.” 

You whimper as she continues playing with your nipple. The thoughts in your brain are jumbled and you barely are able to string them together, not with the constant stimulation of Rio Vidal all over you. A brief blip of clarity strikes you, remembering Agatha. You finally pull your eyes from Rio to look at Agatha and your breath catches in your throat. 

Agatha has her pants around her mid-thighs, holding a purple dildo in her hand that was fastened to a black harness around her hips. She's working her hand up and down the length of the toy slowly, but once you notice what she's doing, she bucks into her closed fist. 

“Keep going, baby,” she rasps, hips rocking into her hand, “Daddy's just fine right here for now, keep playing with her.” 

Rio nips at your throat, more with her lips than her teeth. The noises you make only encourage her, swapping to bite down your neck until she reaches your collarbones with her mouth.

“Can I take this off?” 

Her hand has left your chest and now holds the hem of your shirt. You nod, unable to take your eyes off Agatha. Rio tugs your shirt up, slowly exposing your stomach. She lowers her head down to kiss the uncovered soft skin, following the fabric with a drag of her lips until your breasts are freed from the shirt. 

Agatha watches with rapt attention, peeling her hand off of the toy and raising her palm to her mouth. She spits into it and wraps her fingers around the tip of the toy again, spreading her saliva down the length in a painfully arousing way that makes you feel like you're starving for it. Your mouth waters as your tongue slips past your lips to wet them. 

Rio immediately latches onto a nipple, holding the shirt up with one hand while she cups underneath your breast with the other. She snaps you out of the hypnosis of Agatha jerking herself off with a moan that vibrates into your ribcage. You cry out louder and Agatha snaps her hips up into her hand, grunting from your sounds. 

“Fuck, baby,” she groans, “I might need you to quiet down or else Rio won't ever let it go.” 

Rio’s tongue curls around your stiff nipple, and you have to clench your thighs together to hold back from trying to touch yourself. 

Another shot of clarity hits as your mind jumps back to what you came here for: Joxer.

Rio bites on your nipple, rolling it between her teeth, and you sputter out another moan for her. Your hand grips on the back of Rio’s head, holding her to your breast, and lift your hips up to grind against nothing. 

“Oh, is she needy?” Agatha asks, hand stilling on her toy while she runs her tongue against the back of her teeth and grins. “Why don't you tell daddy what you need?”

You pout, “I need- ah. I need to be touched.”

Agatha smirks. “Isn't that what Rio's doing?” 

Rio looks up at you with her big, brown, doe eyes, and sucks more of your breast into her mouth. You gasp at the sensation, hips lifting again to grind into the air and you whine. 

“You gotta be more specific, hon.” 

You hiss through your teeth, “Need you to fuck me.” 

Rio lets your breast fall from her mouth with a pop and she pushes you back on the couch. She settles on her knees between your legs, hands gripping at the waistband of your pants. Positively dying to get you naked and have her way with you. You throb at the look on her face, dark eyes staring between your legs at her prize. 

“Whoa,” Agatha holds up a hand between Rio’s face and you, palming at her wife’s cheek, “I think she said she needed me to fuck her, not you.” 

Rio rolls her eyes, sneering. She slides Agatha’s hand from her face. “Well, you snooze you lose.”

She shoves your shorts off, moaning with elation at the sight of your clearly soaked through underwear. Agatha grabs at her shoulder and moves her away. She nudges her further with her foot before replacing her between your legs. 

“There she is,” Agatha coos, “You need daddy to fuck you, huh?”

You nod, staring at the toy fastened to Agatha’s hips. She grips it, holding it steady. 

“You want daddy's cock?” You nod again. “Ask nicely and maybe she'll give you it.” 

It’s bigger than you’ve used before, but not by much. Thicker, longer, and the tip was definitely more bulbous than what you have back home.

Your shirt drops below your tits and she clicks her tongue. She bunches it in her hands and carefully draws it up over your head. She sighs happily, taking both of your tits in each hand. Her thumb runs over your hardened nipples, and you gasp at how rough the pads of her fingers were.

“That's not asking, baby.”

You try to press your thighs together, try to get any sort of friction to your aching clit, but nothing helps. You ache, throbbing for her to sink that toy she was playing with earlier inside of you. 

Rio trails a hand up your forearm innocently, knowing full well Agatha would be annoyed. “Don't you wanna be our good girl?” 

“Daddy,” you mumble, eyes pinching closed to try and get your words out clearly. “I want your cock. Please, daddy.”

Agatha tweaks both of your nipples at the same time. “Doesn't sound believable to me.” 

Rio nods in agreement. She brushes the hair out of your face, tucking it behind your ear and presses a kiss to your cheek. 

“I bet you'd look so good riding her,” she trails off in a groan at the thought. “Ask nicer.” 

“I need-,” you try to say until Agatha licks her thumb and rubs her saliva against your nipple, and it fully clears your brain. “Oh, fuck.” 

Rio frowns, settling back in her spot on the couch. She sneaks one of her legs behind you, leaning back on the arm of the couch so you're now between her legs while Agatha is still between yours. 

She pulls her shirt up to reveal her black, cotton shorts. You turn your head and see she has them off now, balling the fabric into her hands before she tosses them at Agatha. 

They knock into Agatha's neck, and she rolls her eyes and grumbles under her breath. 

“If you don't want her dick, I'll take it.” 

Your eyes snap open as you feel Rio sitting back up, “No-no please! I need it, please. Fuck me, daddy. God, please!”

Agatha grins, removing her hand from your chest to grab onto her toy again. She pulls you forward on the couch, tugging your ruined underwear down your legs with a swift motion, and lines the toy up with your cunt. 

She runs her other hand down between your legs, feeling the goosebumps form up the inside of your thigh before settling her hand at your pubic bone. Agatha rubs her thumb through your folds and you whimper quietly, moving your hips back in hopes she’d touch your clit. She spreads you instead, whistling low at the sight in front of her.

“You think I’ll fit, baby? I might split you in two. I think I want to.” her voice is raspy, dangerous. She means it. She drags the tip of the toy through your folds now, replacing her hand with it and she shivers, “All of this, and it's all mine.” 

Rio scoffs. “And mine.” 

Agatha’s eyes move from between your thighs to meet Rio's. She raises a brow in question and sinks the tip of her silicone cock inside your slick heat. 

You cry out, hands gripping onto the couch cushion underneath you for stability. Agatha and Rio stare at each other, neither wanting to break the stare they hold. 

“More,” you beg shamelessly, “Fill me, daddy.” 

Agatha’s gaze falls back to you, watching as your tight, perfect cunt greedily takes each inch of her cock. Her lower lip trembles as she bottoms out inside of you. 

“Stretched out for me,” Agatha pants, forcing her hips further to you and making sure you have every last bit of her sheathed inside, “I can't believe you can take all of me. Such a good girl, made for my cock.” 

Your head rolls back, turning to look at Rio. After she took her shorts off, you never realized she wasn't wearing underwear. Her pussy was on display and you drool at the sight. Rio giggles, hand extending out to swipe the bit that dribbled out of the corner of your mouth. 

“Want a taste?” Rio asks, taking her hand out to spread your drool between her folds. Her cunt glistens from the light of the television screen with her arousal, from what she's done to you. “I bet Daddy would love to watch you eat me while she fucks you. Wouldn't you, Aggie?” 

Agatha can only grunt in response, silicone cock still sheathed inside of you. She rocks into you and clenches her jaw, knowing and practically feeling the tip of the toy was pushing into your cervix.

Slowly, she slips the toy out of you entirely and you miss the constant presence of her.

“Get on all fours,” Agatha orders, voice wavering for a moment before settling back at the deeper tone she’s used since you started, “It’s one way to keep you both under control.”

You follow along, kneeling where you initially sat, and drop to your elbows. You tuck your arms under Rio’s knees and situate them over your shoulders, hands gripping her thighs. She exhales with a breathy chuckle, and you grin up at her with the most excited and equally confused smile. 

Agatha grabs you by your hips, positioning your ass in the air before she palms at it. You rock back, the flesh of your ass cheek pressing back into Agatha's hand and she squeezes. 

“Oh, there's that cheeky personality I knew you had,” Agatha drums at your ass with her fingers, “I just needed your face nearly in my wife’s pussy for you to really come out to play.” 

Wife?

They're married?

Her toy was still soaked from your arousal, easily sinking it back into your core with a swift thrust in. You lurch forward at the sudden feeling of the thick toy inside of you and your nose nudges against Rio’s cunt. She yelps at the contact and grips you by the hair to keep you there. All thoughts of the two being married melt away. 

“Need more,” she whines, “I need that mouth on me, baby. Just focus on me and not her, I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” 

You look up at Rio and press a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss to her clit. You kiss again, rubbing your nose into her trimmed patch of pubic hair and Rio groans in approval.

You stick your tongue out and press it flat at her entrance and drag it up to her clit. You flick at the swollen bundle of nerves with the tip of your tongue before repeating your strokes. 

Rio moans, fingers still holding your head in place. Agatha’s lip twitches at how you were paying more attention to Rio than her. 

She claps your ass cheek hard, causing you to gasp and lift away from Rio’s cunt as much as you could. Rio growls in annoyance, holding your head still as she starts to buck against it. 

Agatha smacks your ass again, thrusting in and out of you with measured snaps of her hips. She pulls the toy out until just the tip remains, forcing your walls to clench and hold it tight before fucking it back into you. 

“I feel it,” you grunt, teeth bared against Rio’s folds, “You're in my stomach, daddy. You're so deep.” 

The term falls from your lips so easily, never having called anyone daddy before. It was so effortless, so authentically something to call Agatha. 

Agatha lies on top of your back, hand running from your hip to under your navel. She thrusts the toy in again and hums in delight at feeling herself through your skin. 

“I told you I’d split you in half, hon.” She kisses your spine, fingers pushing down against the silicone, “You love it too, don't you?” 

You can barely comprehend it. Having your face in Rio’s hot, wet cunt while Agatha fucks you from behind. It's so much but so good. 

Agatha holds down her fingers against the bulge in your stomach as she continues to rail you. Enamored by your body and how well you take her, as well as fascinated by feeling herself. 

Rio keeps bucking up and your face, growing more desperate for your attention. She mewls out, heels digging into your shoulder blades. “Keep going, baby. Wanna cover your face with me.”

You try to continue, and you ache to, but with the way your body continues to bounce against Agatha’s strap, it was like you were only able to do this. That you were supposed to always be fucked by Agatha. 

You feel your orgasm swelling just beneath Agatha’s fingertips, digging your knees into the couch while you pant through your teeth. The combination of your drool and Rio’s arousal shoot out with each quick exhale of breath, leaving a spittle trail between Rio’s legs. 

Agatha smirks through her own movements once she notices Rio’s frustration and how she was losing. She leans back and fucks you deeper, as deep as she can. Her hips slam against your bare ass, and she growls at the feeling of your wetness spilling out from around the toy. 

“Bet I can make you cum before Rio can.”

Rio’s eyes widen, “Don’t you fucking dare.”

Agatha winks, sliding her hand from the bulge of her toy down to your clit. She starts rubbing quick, tight circles around it as you scream. Your sensitive nipples drag against the couch, throwing gasoline on the overwhelming fire of your desire. 

Rio keeps fucking your face as best as she can, smearing herself all around your mouth and chin. She clenches her jaw, feeling her own orgasm building but not as fast as yours. The hand in your hair tightens painfully to hold your head steady while she chases her pleasure. 

Your brain goes blank as your eyes roll into the back of your head with a choked sob, and you are thrown into the absolute hurricane of your orgasm. You clench as hard as you can around the toy, but Agatha keeps fucking you through it with a wild cackle. 

“Good girl,” she praises, scratching angry, red lines down your lower back and onto your ass cheeks with both hands, “Milk my cock, take it. Tell me who owns this pussy, who is making you feel this fucking good.”

You start to call out her name, the vowel beginning with a loud “ah” before Rio smothers the words with her center to silence you. 

Agatha’s lip curls in a snarl, rubbing your clit harder and faster with her fingers held tightly together. Rio’s breaths grow shallow, whimpering as she pinches her own nipple and grinds into your opened mouth. 

“Gonna- oh,” she inhales sharp and then grunts, her head falling back, “I’m so close, baby. So, so close.”

Your eyes blink separately, one at a time. You roll your tongue through Rio’s folds and tuck it inside of her as best as you can before a second orgasm has your knees shaking. Your hips drop, internal muscles holding onto Agatha’s strap so tightly that you take her with you. 

Rio chirps in elation as she cums. Her juices gush out and into your mouth. You sputter a choke, brain delayed from everything and manage to swallow what you can solely to not drown between the agent’s thighs. 

Agatha curses under her breath, bent awkwardly now with you fully lying on the couch while she's buried inside of you. You turn your head away from Rio’s cunt, gasping for air. Agatha rubs at your ass cheek with a thumb, looking over both you and Rio in front of her. 

Her heart thuds harder in her chest for a beat, a smile pulling at either corner of her mouth until she catches herself and she clears her throat. 

Rio’s eyes open, lazily smiling up at her wife while she scratches at your scalp with her fingernails. She sits up from the arm of the couch, eyeing you. You’re quiet, lying still between her legs with your head on her thigh. 

Asleep.

Rio settles back down and continues scratching at your scalp, her eyes closing once more. The credits of the movie roll, a fast-paced rock song playing over the white script of names. It startles you awake but both of the women shush you gently. 

“Hey there,” Rio chuckles, removing her hand from your hair and places it on your shoulder blade, “Took a little nap?”

You lick your lips, tasting nothing but Rio’s cum as you try to rehydrate your mouth. You blink hard, pushing up to move away, but your arms tremble, and you fall back against Rio’s thigh.

“Don’t move too much, hon,” Agatha’s hands are on your hips, holding you steady, “I’m gonna pull out and get you more comfortable.”

She starts to slip out of you, only halfway out before you grumble. “Don’t.”

Agatha’s heart thuds again, and she bites her lower lip, eyes immediately looking down between your joined bodies. Your slick has the purple toy shimmering deliciously, making her fight every ounce of being from filling you once more. 

“I need to, baby. We can all go cuddle after we get cleaned up.”

You pout, lower lip jutting forward into the flesh of Rio’s thigh. Rio laughs under her breath, moving your hair out of your face. “She’s right, love.”

You relax again and let Agatha pull out of you entirely while still pouting the entire time. The emptiness makes you want to cry, sniffling impulsively. Agatha rubs at your thigh, leaning down to press a kiss against your lower back. 

“I’ll be right back.”

She stands from the couch and you listen to her footfalls against the hardwood floors grow further and further away. Rio situates you further on the couch, tucking her leg up on the couch next to you. You open your eyes, having them unfocus for a moment until everything comes into clear view. 

You didn’t take in their house much when you arrived, and certainly didn’t have time to once the movie started. It was a normal, neat little house. It was clear what was Rio’s and what was Agatha’s. The stark contrast of greenery and floral paintings as well as plants versus sport team items on the shelves and fishing baubles with pictures of the two women around the living room. 

Your brain is partially rebooted, now becoming painfully aware of what just happened and with whom. You freeze at the sound of Agatha approaching. 

“I’ve got a warm wash cloth and some water,” she sets the water on the table by Rio and holds the wash cloth in her hand, “I’m going to clean you up, okay?”

You nod, trying to hide your immediate panic at the moment. Agatha gently and delicately swipes between your legs, and you feel the throb of overuse from your clit. The friction of the warm wash cloth has you gasping, rolling your hips away from it. 

Agatha hums, thumb pressing underneath your ass cheek as she continues to clean you up. “We’ll talk in a second, baby. Just relax.”

You do as you’re told, easily able to succumb to the warmth and care of the older woman despite your anxiety. She takes her time and when she’s done, she guides you to sit up and offers the wash cloth to Rio. 

“I’m good,” she winks at you, waving the offer away, “I’ll take a kiss, though.”

The two women exchange a kiss, and you turn away to give them their moment. You feel a hand on your knee, but you don’t look. 

They break their kiss, Agatha touches her forehead against Rio’s with a smile, and she tosses the wash cloth to the floor. Rio sits up, pulling her legs up with one underneath her bare backside and the other bending at the knee to rest her arm on. Agatha settles in on the other side of you, mirroring the same spots you were all sat in earlier. 

She brushes her shoulder against yours, and she reaches out to cup your cheek. You look up at her slowly, still spent from everything. Agatha smiles at you, stroking your face with her thumb. 

She leans in and takes your lips against hers in a way that was almost uncharacteristic of her. It was gentle, reassuring. No need, no heat, just a comfort you want to wrap around yourself and sink into. Your eyes flutter close, melting into her. 

When she pulls away, she smiles even bigger. Agatha pecks at your lips one last time before moving back to her spot on the couch fully, giving you your space back.

“So,” Rio begins. You immediately blush, “Are you okay?”

You nod, swallowing hard with your hands in your lap. Being completely naked between the two women was intimidating. 

“I mean,” you start, running a hand through your hair as your cheeks puff out with an exhale, “I wasn't expecting any of this. Not that I'm complaining, mind you.”

Agatha and Rio laugh at that. You awkwardly start to laugh too, but stop just as quickly as you started. Agatha throws an arm around your shoulders, squeezing you toward her. 

“We wanted you, you didn’t impose or anything. I promise this wasn’t some weird way to fix our marriage or anything, we’re both very happy with each other.”

She sounds sincere. The way Rio and Agatha were still loving towards one another after it all was proof enough. 

“So you really just, wanted me?” you find yourself asking, “I’ve never been in a threesome before. Never knew I wanted to, truth be told.”

Agatha presses a kiss to the side of your head, smiling into your hair. The stark contrast of the detective in the throes of passion and after were two completely different people. You find yourself wanting more of both.

“We just had a friendly wager, per se,” Rio adds, scooting over to wrap her arms around your torso. She rests her head on your shoulder, looking around you at her wife. “We wanted to see who could make you loudest. Couldn’t figure it out, though.”

Agatha huffs in annoyance, “Would’ve been me if you didn’t cheat.”

Rio sticks her tongue out at Agatha, laughing again. You enjoy the warmth of their bodies sandwiching yours, finding yourself laughing as well but with a comfort instead of panic. 

The three of you fall into a silence as the TV picks up with another movie. You all stay together, held together in a post-coital bliss until your phone loudly interrupts the serenity. Rio clicks her tongue at it, but reaches for your shorts on the ground and tosses your phone to you.

You answer it without reading the caller ID. 

“Hey!” you recognize the voice, it’s your neighbor. “I’ve had Joxer here all day, even had one of the Westview PD guys come check for him, but I forgot to call earlier.”

You hear your goofy dog panting in the background and you grin. “Oh, that’s great! I can come get him if he’s being a pest.”

Agatha’s arm around your shoulder slackens in disappointment, but you don’t move to get up. 

“Nah,” your neighbor says, “I’ll hold him for the night. I think you need some rest, you sound beat.”

Rio’s tongue pokes out to swipe at the corner of her mouth, holding herself back from laughing at the words. Agatha’s arm tightens around you again, and you clench at the ache where her strap was. 

“If you don’t mind, then sure! I’ll get him in the morning.”

Your neighbor agrees, ending the call with a bark from Joxer on the other line before you drop your phone to your lap. 

“My dog was at their house all day.”

You turn to look at Rio, eyes narrowing. 

“You never told me who had him.”

Rio pinches an eye closed, holding her hands up in front of her. “Okay, guilty. But! I didn't lie. Started knocking on doors and actually met him on a walk, by I’m assuming your neighbor. I asked for him by name and the big lug nearly knocked me over.”

“We just wanted a reason to talk to you again,” Agatha rasps, nuzzling your head with her nose, “I couldn’t get you out of my head, and neither could Rio. We did do our jobs, though.”

You breathe a sigh of relief at the whole endeavor being over with your dog just on a brief little vacation. You shake your head at it all, though. The detectives you met earlier today, the ones you were trying to get to help you find your dog, ended up seducing you instead while your dog was a couple doors down the whole time. 

You grab Rio, pulling her in to a hug while leaning into Agatha’s side. “You’re both fucking crazy, you know that right?”

“Yes,” Rio responds, voice thick with amusement, “But you like it.”

The weight has been lifted from your shoulders, and you can finally feel yourself dropping from the heightened state of stress over it all. Rio kisses your cheek, booping your nose with her finger before doing the same to Agatha. 

“Well since he’s having a sleep-over,” Rio says, “Maybe we can too?”

Agatha nudges you with her bicep to your back, “That sound like a plan, superstar?”

You snort at the nickname, making Agatha smirk. 

“I guess,” you try to come off nonchalant, but both of the women grin at you and your poorly crafted facade crumbles. “I hope your bed’s big enough. I hog the blankets.”

[airprime7]

Why am I seeing so many fake posts on my dash? Like, there's ones from all sorts of made up realities, I'm surprised I haven't seen ones set in webcomics or whatever.

0 notes

♊️ twinarmageddons reblogged

♊️ twinarmageddons

all of you iidiiot2 need two 2hut up about computer2 unle22 you know what you're talkiing about. ii 2wear ii 2aw 2ome guy telliing people two pour water on theiir keyboard2 two clean them.

♉️ adiostoreador

uH,,,

iS THAT NOT HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO, uH, dO IT,

♊️ twinarmageddons

oh my fuckiing god 2ome people are actual iidiiot2

#ii mean come on you actually beliieved that

22 notes

♑️ terminallycapricious

wAsSuP mOtHeRfUcKeRs???

#HoNk

420 notes

♌️ arseniccatnip reblogged

♌️ arseniccatnip

:33 < hiii!!!

:33 < my name is nepeta leijon, and this is my furst post!

:33 < i like shipping, and rolepurrlaying, and hunting

:33 < i have troll pawtism, so i might not be the best at understanding things. sorry if i get confused!

:33 < i also do art, and my commissions are open! purrlease don't ask me to draw trolls pailing, i'm only 6

:33 < bye! :33

♋️ carcinogeneticist

HOW STUPID DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO PUT YOUR FULL NAME IN YOUR PINNED POST.

DON'T YOU KNOW THE FIRST RULE OF GRUMBLR IS NEVER USE YOUR REAL NAME, YOU IDIOTIC EXCUSE FOR A PERSON.

♒️ caligulasaquarium Follow

wwhy is your text grey

♋️ carcinogeneticist

I DON'T KNOW, WHY ARE YOU SUCH A PRETENTIOUS ASSHOLE, FISH FACE.

🤡 i-say-honk Follow

hOnK!

♋️ carcinogeneticist

FUCK OFF, TC, WE ALL KNOW IT'S YOU.

THIS STUPID "GIMMICK BLOG" ISN'T EVEN FUNNY.

♌️ arseniccatnip

:33 < @carcinogeneticist @caligulasaquarium @i-say-honk kill yourselves

#:33 < :33

333 notes

♍️ grimauxiliatrix reblogged

♈️ apocalypsearisen Follow

im dead n0w

♍️ grimauxiliatrix

Mood

#Honestly I Cant Believe I Made It Through This Week Alone

60 notes

♋️ carcinogeneticist reblogged

👻 ectobiologist Follow

hi! how do i use this app?

♋️ carcinogeneticist

HUMAN ALERT.

@human-alarm

👤 human-alarm Follow

BEEP

612 notes

♋️ carcinogeneticist reblogged

♐️ centaurstesticle Follow

D -> The day we stop valuing horses is the day society collapses

♐️ centaurstesticle

D -> @cuttlefishculler Perhaps I do share some interests with the protagonist of the new popular movie starring Troll Ryan Gosling

D -> If anything that would be a compliment

D -> Not that that's something a f001 such as yourself would understand

♓️ cuttlefishculler Follow

)(-EY, I was just joking around. No need to start being c-rude!!! 380

♏️ arachnidsgrip Follow

Protagonist!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

What movie did you watch? 8ecause 8ar8ie is defin8ly the hero of the one I saw, hooves-for-8rains.

♈️ apocalypsearisen Follow

i liked the 0ne with the b0mb m0re

♒️ caligulasaquarium Follow

rustblood, opinion disregarded

♋️ carcinogeneticist

BLATANT HEMOPHOBIA ASSIDE, ARE WE JUST GOING TO IGNORE OP'S URL?

♊️ twinarmageddons

forget that, cc ii2 the ACTUAL HEIIRE22

♋️ carcinogeneticist

HOLY SHIT, WHO CARES.

1380 notes

♏️ arachnidsgrip reblogged

♏️ arachnidsgrip

You know, I think the murders were good for me.

♎️ gallowscalibrator Follow

VR1SK4, YOU K1LL3D 31GHTY-31GHT P3OPL3.

♏️ arachnidsgrip

Yeah, 8ut I'm over it now. It doesn't effect me anymore.

#I've moved on.

413 notes

♉️ adiostoreador reblogged

💽 turntechgodhead Follow

man i cant believe troll steve jobs died of ligma

♉️ adiostoreador

wHO, uM, wHO'S TROLL STEVE JOBS?

[mclager]

And McLaren will call them... | Landoscar x reader

I was doing what a good girlfriend does as her boyfriends are doing media stuff, watching tiktok, McLaren's tiktoks, it is a great thing to pass time. As I was watching it I ended up seeing one of the best (and worse) captions ever! McLaren calling them siblings, the same McLaren that knows that they are in a full blown relationship. Since Oscar started to be more open about being close with Lando, McLaren started to freak out saying that people couldn't know anything about our relationship. Well, after that Oscar signed his multiple years contract with McLaren and decided that his new catch frase would be "We're going to grow old together." He just loved the idea of being a menace to PR, and Lando watched it with a proud smile on his face. Now socials are probably just trying to combat the wildfire Oscar caused.

They came back after the media stuff straight into Lando's drivers room where I was chilling. Lando was picking on Oscar for something as he did almost all the time.

"A lot of more Landoscar moments?" Lando said chuckling as he poked Oscar's waist.

"Since when you know the ship name?"

"Since the interview we just did. Osc just out of nowhere said it."

"Isn't that cute? Our chronically online boyfriend." I said making Oscar roll his eyes.

"I'm not chronically online, you're."

"Yeah, I am. At least I'm not being 'sibling coded' with my boyfriend." Both boys looked so confused which made me laugh.

"What are you talking about?" Lando asked and I showed my phone with the McLaren video, Lando was shocked, but he also was laughing at the desperation that PR is on right now, Oscar was just pissed.

"Not wanting us to display our relationship I get it even if it's bullshit, the sport is ran by old men, but from that to call us siblings? Too far."

"Osc, calm down, socials are just trying to end the Landoscar trend I guess."

"Oh, but now they're fucked."

One thing about Oscar? When he gets pissed, you get out of his way.

"Babe, watch out, you don't want to get fired."

"I won't be, trust me."

And right then and there started a series of things that would send PR to a coma. Started with them walking a little too close, then the laughs, then Lando was congratulating Osc with a little slap on the bum, then Oscar saying that they're a good match especially off track, or mentioning that they had dinner together after a race instead of going partying. It was the little things that would be ok if McLaren didn't know what Oscar was trying to do.

PR ran fast to tell Oscar to stop saying shit in the interviews, and it only made the evil genius happier as his plan was really bothering them. When they said to stop in interviews, he thought 'why not on real life then?'. It was a normal thing for us to have dinner together, but normally we try to not go on the paparazzi filled restaurants, but now? Oh well, sounds like a good idea to Oscar, and Lando was happy to oblige. I couldn't go on the first two or three (which was incredible for the Landoscar agenda given all the tiktoks made about it), but at the fourth I was there.

"How it's going with the Landoscar plan?" I asked sipping on my drink.

"Great, I'm loving being used." Lando said making Oscar laugh.

"I'm not using you, drama boy." Lando put his hand near Oscar's and linked his pinky with his.

"You're, but I'll let it slide because you look good."

"Pretty privilege is crazy." I said chuckling, Oscar rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Anyway, let me put you on the loop since you were too busy for us. PR almost tried to ban us having dinner dates."

"There's no way."

"They tried, but Zac and Andrea were digging the free marketing." Oscar nodded agreeing with Lando.

"One trip and you two are making people cry. That's my boys." Lando reached across the table to hold my hand.

"Tell us about the trip, I want all the gossip."

"Oh, I have lots." We started to talk about all the drama that happened on my trip with my friends, it was an amazing dinner.

"Which house we're going?" I asked before walking through the door that was being held by Oscar.

"Lando's."

"I'm going to get the car, you can wait here." Lando said and started to walk through some fans that were there, Oscar also went to take pictures with them as I was looking from a distance. Not so long after Lando came back and I just got in the back seat as Oscar got in the passenger beside Lando. He caressed Lando's hair as he started to drove away.

"McLaren will kill us, you know that right?" Lando said and Oscar nodded.

"I hope this is enough for them to understand that we're not sibling coded, Jesus, I'm pissed."

"I'm only here for the drama." I said and Lando chuckled.

"We know." It was a fun night, after dinner we watched a cheesy movie and slept on the couch. I woke up in bed with Lando, Oscar was nowhere to be found, but I was hearing him in the distance, he sounded nervous. I called Lando a couple times before he woke up.

"What's wrong?"

"Osc, he is talking on the phone."

"And?"

"Sounds like something is wrong." Lando picked his phone to see if he had received something and he had. "Oh fuck, PR is pissed. He look cute, don't we?" He showed me a picture of us on the restaurant, laughing at the table, under it a picture of Oscar with his hand on Lando's hair inside the car.

"We do. What do you think they're talking with Oscar?"

"Probably they're trying to make him stop to do this." He showed me a picture of Him and Oscar with their hands way to close while they were smiling lovingly to eachother.

"You two are so cute."

"You're too, darling." Oscar walked in and looked at us.

"Fuck, I woke you up? I'm sorry." I reached my hand and when he held my hand, I pulled him to sit down with us.

"You didn't, it's fine. What happened?"

"I had a fight with my PR manager, a long one, trying to figure out something that could work out for us and McLaren."

"And what you agreed on?" Lando asked putting his head on my stomach to see Oscar better.

"So... First I said that they needed to stop to call us siblings, brothers, or anything weird like that, and they agreed. They asked for us to tone down the dates, but I asked for less interventions on what we do out of the media's eyes, they said ok, but after everything calm down. We need to have a proper meeting with everyone, PR, Zac and Stella, and our managers. You're invited too, love." He looked at me and I nodded.

"Should I go?"

"Of course! This affects you too, darling." Lando said and I nodded.

"Look, this isn't the best, but is going to be better."

"If I'm with my two loves, I'm happy. Don't worry, Oscariño." Lando pulled Oscar to a group hug. I chuckled and hugged them.

"I agree with Lando. No matter what if I'm here, I'm happy."

"I love you two so much!"

"We love you too." Osc gave us a quick kiss and hugged us back.

"Then let's think about this later, today is a off day."

"It's a us day."

[anystalker707]

a sweet reminder

Pairing: Luke Skywalker x [gender-neutral] Reader Summary: Spending a nice time with Luke after he's done working at the farm, and of course he's awfully sweet. Tags: clingy luke / he really wants to take care of you / lots of kisses

MASTER LIST

          Despite the usual high temperatures, the day felt exceptionally hot—the suns seemed to be taking out personal anger on Luke, making each step towards his home feel like torture, and he already knew he’d need some cream later tonight to deal with burning in the areas where the sunlight chastened his tanned skin. He furrowed his eyebrows, patting his clothes to get rid of the sand accumulated between the folds.

The droids wouldn’t do everything, so Luke still needed to carry those heavy buckets of water back home to refill the sprinklers. He tried to balance between no water spilled and the intense pain in his fingers to let buckets down on the ground as slowly as he could, and the pain lingered uncomfortably around his knuckles.

“Fuck,” Luke breathed as he opened and closed his hand a few times until the stiffness went away, or at least most of it. He sighed as he placed his hands on his hips, looking down, letting the breeze refresh the back of his neck before he moved to finish his task. He would be free for the last of the day, hopefully.

Luke’s thoughts were fuzzy already after so many hours under the suns, but he had done that enough times to trust himself on autopilot. He could name a handful of things—more, actually—he would rather be doing right now.

A long breath escaped his lips once he was done, and he tried his best to ignore the tingling in the back of his mind that told him it was only a matter of time before his uncle told him to do something else. He took a deep breath as he walked over to the kitchen, his body instinctively freezing when he heard his name being called, but hey, it wasn’t Uncle Owen.

“Luke,” the voice called again, and he stepped out to see you coming down the edge. A smile tugged on your lips when you finally saw him, sighing. “Wow, you look like you’ve been… smuggled by Jawas.”

“Oh,” Luke chuckled, shaking his head. “Just slaving away as usual,” he breathed, glancing behind him, but no one from his family was around. He wiped the sweat away from his brow with his forearm, and he shook his head again so that his strands would fall back into place.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, just feeling a little too hot and cranky.” Luke scrunched his nose a little. Today’s weather seemed harsher than usual, and opposite to his wishes to stay home upgrading his ship, he had to work at the farm for longer than normal today.

You raised your eyebrows, nodding faintly. “I was gonna ask you to come grab a drink with me, but we don’t need to go anywhere if you don’t want to.”

Luke’s eyes followed your hand reaching out to brush his hair back into place, and he made sure to stand still while you did so. “Doesn’t sound bad at all,” he said. “Maybe we can have a couple of glasses of blue milk while we hang out in the garage. I was gonna tinker around with my stuff anyway.” He grabbed your hand, walking by the kitchen with you to grab the promised drink before you two could go sit on the couch in the garage. He always sat close, pressed to your side. “Ugh, what a day, I swear. Anything interesting happened while I was slaving away?”

“Stop being so dramatic,” you scoffed with an endearing smile. You enjoyed the refreshing sensation of the blue milk going down your throat, and the garage felt a lot nicer than being cooked under the suns outside. On the other hand, maybe it’d be colder than usual tonight. “And no, nothing interesting. I did hit my head on the edge of a ship while fixing it, though. I’m not sure if that’s interesting,” you chuckled, bringing a hand up to the sore spot on top of your head out of instinct.

Blue eyes observed you over the rim of the glass before Luke lowered it, licking his lips as his eyes roamed over you with clear concern, a crease forming between his eyebrows. A small sound came from him as he put his glass away. “Oh no, are you alright? Let me take a look.” He adjusted his position and placed your glass on the table as well, reaching out to touch your head. His fingertips gently traced the area where you’d hit with a delicate and soft touch. “Does this hurt?” He applied a little pressure.

“Ow,” you hissed at the unexpected pain, though it wasn’t too bad. You’d forget it hurt if nothing touched the area you’d hit. “Only a little sore.” 

“I don’t feel any bumps or swelling, but I think we should keep an eye on it, anyway,” Luke exhaled. “But that’s a relief. We don’t want you losing any more brain cells.” He chuckled and kissed the top of your head carefully, his hand descending to cup your cheek for a brief moment. Concern was evident in his eyes as they met yours, making your heart flutter in your chest. “I have a bacta spray. It should help. Do you want me to get it?”

You placed your hand on top of his to squeeze it reassuringly, letting it fall to your lap. “I’m fine, I swear. Maybe we should be more worried about your brain cells cooking in this heat, yeah?” You chuckled, running your thumb over Luke’s knuckles when his eyes widened, and you were sure his blushing would be apparent if it weren’t for his sun-kissed skin.

“H-Hey, my brain is just fine, thank you very much!” Luke’s attempt to sound indignant failed miserably with his embarrassment, and he bit his lip, glancing away. “It’s not like I’m hallucinating or anything.” His eyes softened when they met yours again, and he lifted his free hand, his fingertips grazing your cheek gently—he raised his eyebrows a little when you leaned into his touch. “Are you sure you’re okay?” He leaned in closer. “Maybe I should take another look, just to be safe.”

Part of you regretted telling Luke about the bump when concern laced his gaze once more—you thought he’d be more used to it, since you and him were always with a bruise or another from working on those ships or machines the whole time.

“It’s okay,” you insisted, catching his hand between yours before he could reach for your head again. “Trust me, Luke.” You squeezed his hand gently.

Luke exhaled. “Okay. If you’re sure.” He looked down at your joined hands before he leaned in, his nose brushing against yours. “But if it gets worse, you���ll tell me, right?” His wide, earnest eyes looked into yours, pleading, before he pressed his forehead to yours, both out of habit and out of worry. Clingy, as always. “I could kiss it better.” His breath fanned over your face. “If you want me to, I mean.” As if he hadn’t already.

“You’re such a sweetheart,” you mumbled, your eyelids instinctively hiding half of your irises when the distance between you diminished. “Why are you always doing this? Pressing your forehead to mine. Trying to read my thoughts?” You chuckled, and he couldn’t help but do the same.

“Oh, I don’t know.” Luke furrowed his eyebrows lightly. “It feels… nice. Comforting, I guess.” He bit his lip, his hand coming up to rest on your shoulder, near the base of your neck. “Don’t act like I’m being clingy.”

“Yeah, feels nice, I enjoy it too… But you’re very clingy all the time, in fact,” you whispered with a small smile, placing a hand on his waist instead, adjusting your position so that you could be closer to each other.

A soft scoff escaped his lips. “You’re the one who wouldn’t stop kissing me the last time,” he pointed out with a shy smile, and he quickly pulled one of your legs to hook over his. “Not that I’m complaining,” he mumbled in a quieter, embarrassed voice, but he didn’t move away. The closeness was exciting and terrifying all at the same time. “I really like it when you do that.”

You raised your eyebrows, feigning cluelessness, despite how your heart fluttered in your chest. “Me? I never even kissed you. Let alone kiss you nonstop.” You clicked your tongue.

Luke pulled away suddenly, making your head fall forward a little, and looked at you with a wide grin and disbelief. “What? But you did! Here in the garage, when we were working on the speeder.” He paused. “Trying to.”

“Did I?” You raised your eyebrows. “I don’t remember it, baby.”

His heart pounded in his chest, and his cheeks burned, not just because of being under the sunlight for hours before. With a dramatically heavy sigh, he leaned in again. “Maybe you should kiss me again, love.” He glanced at your lips. “Just to remind you.”

“Oh, so that’s your suggestion?” You asked, and Luke nodded, biting his lip. “‘M not sure about it,” you mumbled against his cheek, nuzzling it softly.

“Well, we should try, maybe it’ll remind you,” Luke chuckled softly, turning his head. His lips brushed against yours in a barely-there touch. It was more of a tease, but still managed to send a tingling down his spine. He cupped the side of your neck, his thumb under your jaw, leaning in, and finally kissed you properly. His lips finally met yours, his breath hitching. Luke loved the warmth of your mouth, the softness of your lips, and it made his head spin when you kissed him back just as lovingly. “Like this?”

“I don’t think I’ve remembered enough,” you said as soon as his lips broke away from yours.

Luke chuckled. “We’ll have to keep trying, then.” He pecked your lips. “Until you remember.” Despite the calloused skin, his hands gently cupped your face as he kissed you once more, needy lips pressing to yours in a longer, deeper kiss. His kisses were messy in the best way possible, oscillating between the need and shyness, refraining into more contained movements right after deepening it and getting lost on your lips, trying to get a grip of himself again. “Do you like this?” Luke’s lips grazed yours as he spoke.

“Mhm. So good.” You wrapped your arms around his neck, mirroring his smile. He couldn’t be close enough.

Something shifted in Luke’s gaze as he tilted his head; it was like you were the most precious thing in the whole universe. He kissed you again, letting it last longer, as his thumbs ran along your cheekbones. “You’re so good at this,” he groaned, wrapping his arms around your waist to hug you tightly while nuzzling your nose. “I love being close to you like this.”

⋆｡°✩ ⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊✩₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆ ✩°｡⋆

[supernova41st]

Friday night night funkin dating hcs!!

Warnings: Some nsfw stuff but nothing too far, boob grabbing, bra stealing, nudes but not rlly

A/n: I HAVE ANOTHER OBSESSION UGHHH, anyways!! I’m so happy the fandom is reviving bc of the new update ahh. Also I didn’t rlly know what to put for bc so apologies if you wanted more of him :(

Keith (bf):

He’s such a flower sniffer istg

He’s like a rosy cheeked sweetheart who brings you heart chocolate every time he visits you

No but actually he’s wrapped around your fingers, it’s scary.

His fav dates are you and him alone at his house watching Godzilla movies and laying his head against your stomach while you play with his hair

AND YOU WEAR HIS HAT

Sometimes you’ll send a pic of you in his boxers that he left at your house just to tease him

But whenever he feels silly (which is all the time) he’ll send a picture of him in your bra for funsies

“I can do that too :D”

“0_•”

Keith is such a nerd, playing video games with him is your go to date

You guys would always match, like whenever you two play Mario kart he’d be toad and you’d be toadette

You hype him up sm, esp when playing Fortnite 😭

Y’all know that one Tik tok audio that goes

“Yeah get his ass FUCKING PUSSY TRY THE FUCK AGAIN BITCH, TRY THE FUCK AGAIII”

You do that, and it scares him.

His fav activity? Pot + cartoons.

You guys are the silliest couples ever. Laughing at SpongeBob with fog all over the room until your ribs start to hurt.

“Babes.. do you think that like-Starfires armpits are also pink?”

“…woah”

Pico:

Now when pico first starting dating you he thought you were just another chick to stuff his wiener in.

But soon enough, you guys were both wrapped around each others finger.

He’d kill for you tbh

Pico canonically has abs, so he likes it whenever he’s chilling with you and you just poke/rub them. He thinks it’s the cutest AND hottest shit ever

This man cannot get enough of your boobies, whenever he’s on his phone he’d have his arm around you and casually use your boob as a stress ball.

Sometimes he’ll just steal your bras whenever you’re showering or changing, just so that he can get a fresh look at ‘his girls’ (that’s what he calls them)

“Pico!! Have you seen my bra?”

“Hm? Na babe, I’m js here.”

This sly fuckin ginger

Most of his dates consist of going to his fav burger joint or sleeping over at each others houses

He esp loves the second one cuz he gets to makeout with you, prob his fav thing to do in this life.

Whenever you guys leave any function, like ever, he’ll yell out your ship name as he leaves the room 😭

“Pi-y/n, OUT”

“Babe you don’t have to do that every time we leave..”

Also his dad (Tankmen) loves embarrassing him in front of you.

(Tankmen) “Yeah so Pico kept pissing himself in the bed until 7th grade, shit had me concerned but turns out it was just normal puberty shit.”

(You)“Oh..”

“Dad I’m gonna kill you.”

Lmao he did eventually

Darnell

Darnell has such a big ego on being a ‘cool tough guy’, but when it comes to you it entirely washes away

It embarrasses him whenever he’s around his friends and you come over and start smooching him all over his face, getting lipgloss/lipstick all over him

“Mwah mwah mwah!!”

“B-baby. Babe, you’re ruining my aura.”

But he loves showing you off, you’re like his biggest flex. Whenever he hangs with his friends he always shows pictures of you like you’re his newborn

“Yeah so this is when we went to the skate park the other week and-“

“Dude. This is like the 5th picture you’ve shown me of them.”

Once for Valentine’s Day, he surprised you by spray painting an entire wall of you smooching him. (But like in the style of the fnf stickers they sell)

You were in such awe, you almost cried.

He was so embarrassed to show you at first, but when he saw how much you loved it he was so relieved

You and Nene are such besties

Like, squealing while talking about boys besties

“HII Y/N!!! :33”

“OMG HEY NENE!! ^^”

So when she found out you had a crush on Darnell, she was so excited

You guys became delusional abt him together, like

“NENE TODAY DARNELL LOOKED AT ME”

“STOPP HE WANTS YOU SO BADD”

“IKR”

O and your weapon (cuz everyone in picos friendgroup has one) is a broken glass bottle of whatever your fav drink is

Sometimes you’ll throw in a burning rag in there to make a Molotov cocktail

Also I hc that Darnell has thick silver rings and you love how they feel against your neck whenever you guys are smooching.

He lets you wear them at times but they always slip off because our boy has some THICK fingers.

[hearts4mica]

I would take the suffering from you! Prologue.

Yan Batfam + Tim Drake x Siren! Reader

Next chapter with yan! Batfam

_________________________________________________

"Sirens tend to transform into persons that their preys love to lure them into the water."

_________________________________________________

Rewriten! Masterlist!

It was late at night and everyone from Tim’s crew was asleep in they assignated rooms, well except Tim of course

He was sitting down outside of his ship watching the waves, it was a calm night. It was too calm. The moonlight was reflecting on the water making a beautiful scene.

Tim had been dreaming with you since he stepped onto the boat. You were gorgeous, every night you appeared in his dreams, Oh how he wished you were real.

Suddenly he saw a head come up from the ocean

He looked like- "[name]?"

The girl from his dreams? He's been dreaming about you for a whole year now and now you were there. A few meters infront of him? How!

You had been watching Tim ever since he sailed onto the ocean. The perfect prey.

After manipulating his dreams for a year you it was time to make the last act.

“Hello Tim” you say as you sit down on a rock not too far from his boat.

He didn’t answer hmm well should you tell a joke to lighten the mood?

“Did the shark eat your toungue?” Wow great joke [name] you really should be a comedian! Mm why didn’t he laugh? Dumb humans with their weird humor.

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Tim could be anything. But he was not stupid. He knew you were a siren, he didn’t know when he was dreaming since you always appeared human and he was not thinking straight when dreaming. But now you were here imfront of him swimmimg on the sea looking perfect it didn’t take a genius to know you were a siren.

Exactly what he came to the sea looking for.

Bruce had given him the mission to capture a Siren and bring it back to the batcave so he could do research on them (Wow Bruce crazy scientist au?)

Anyways now it has been a year and Tim refused to go back to Gotham without his mission being succesful.

And it seems his wait had been worth it.

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“Tiiiiimmm-“ you splash water to his face trying to get him to react. Did he fall asleep with his eyes open?

“Sorry [name]- Yes?” Tim had to convince the creature to come onto the ship by any means!

“How about you jump to the water and i can show you around the Atlantis!?” Just the way i did in your dream!” Say yes say yes.-

“Jump-?” Of course Tim wouldn’t jump! Jumping was basically a death sentence!

“I’d happily jump! But… i’d be suffering trying to stay afloat [name] i’m a really bad swimmer i mean it!”

Yeah right a bad swimmer does this idiot think im stupid? Why would he come onto the ocean without knowing how to swim?!

“I could teach you how to swim! We have the whole ocean for ourselves! I would take the suffering from you!” I shouldn’t be begging for him to jump! He should be begging me to let him live!

“I would love for you to teach me [name] but i’m to shy to jump from here!”

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Next step ask the siren to come onto the boat.

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“You know what? I’ll jump if you answer one or two questions!” Oh? This is getting interesting!

“Ask me anything!” Maybe i should answer honestly since he is gonna die either way.

“Where do you live?”

…

“In Atlanits silly! I told you before in your dreams! Now jump-“ “No. Where.”

“I told you in Atlantis-!” “Tell me the exact location.”

Oh so he’s got an attitude now? Ha rude.

“I’ll show you the way myself! Just jump and i’ll take you there!”

“How about you come onto the boat and draw me the location of the map [name]? And then i’ll jump with you to the water.

He was really stubborn. Well i guess there’s no other way.

“Fine i’ll do itttt! Just cause i really wanna teach you how to swim!” You say as you make the water raise you up so you stand up at the edge of the boat.

‘Stupid Siren.’

“Draw the location in the map.” He said as he shoved the map onto your face

Why was he so rude? You’re a transformed into a human like him…- wait a minute.

Can humans breathe underwater?

“Holy shit.” You say under your breathe as realization hits you like a truck.

‘Humans can’t breathe underwater! And you just told him you lived in Atlantis!-

“Well Timmy it’s been great meeting you in person but i gotta go. You knoww haha-“ suddenly one of your legs gets tied up as you take a step back.

You fell into his trap.

Now you were upside down hanging by a stupid rope

Well now you were totally powerless.

He takes a step forward towards you.

“Well you have made the mistake of stepping into this boat. My territory little mermaid it’s time to take you home where you belong” He says with a evil smirk as he grabs his phone and dials a number.

“Hello Bruce? Mission completed. I’ll see you soon.”

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This is the start of your personal hell.

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If you liked this please comment and ideas of how to introduce the Batfam or anything you like!

Masterlist!