#One of the most delicious parallels to ever parallel

[callme-baeee]

ㅤ♡ HUSBAND!LUIGI MANGIONE HEADCANONS

WARNINGS: suggestive language, curse word i guess that's it. Idk man.

ㅤ♡ You met Luigi because he was struggling to parallel park his car, and you yelled out, “Want me to do it or are you gonna figure it out, fucker?” He smirked (classic him), parked it perfectly just to show off, and then walked over to ask if you need any help. (It was his car. You were walking past. Fate said yes.)

ㅤ♡ He’s the guy who looks tough as nails but will 100% scream if there’s a spider in the bedroom. One time, he made you “escort it out” while he stood on the bed yelling instructions. (You married him anyway because he’s hot.)

ㅤ♡ Proposed during a candlelit dinner at home because he knew you'd get suspicious if he planned anything fancy. Mid-spaghetti twirl, he slid the ring across the table with a suave, “So, wanna make me the happiest guy in the world?” (You choked on your wine, said yes, and then yelled at him for ruining the vibe with how casual it was.)

ㅤ♡ If he sees you crying over a sad movie, he’ll immediately start roasting the plot to make you laugh. “Why didn’t they just move to Florida if the killer clowns were such a problem?” Meanwhile, he’s crying too but won’t admit it.

ㅤ♡ He always insists on carrying all the groceries, even if it means his arms are about to fall off. (One time, he dropped a bag of flour in the driveway and mumbled, ‘It’s fine, I’m still strong,’ as if you doubted him.)

You forwarded your hand indicating him to give some bags since he had too many bag in both of his hands. It was a silent command, one laced with the expectation of immediate compliance.

Instead, he shifted the bags from his left hand to his right, a move that seemed deliberate, almost theatrical. His right hand, already laden with the weight of too many bags, now bore them all. And before you could voice your annoyance, he reached out—grasping your hand with an ease that caught you off guard.

Then came that smile. Not just any smile, but the kind that could melt glaciers, warm the coldest of hearts, and disarm even the most stoic. It was pure, unfiltered joy—mischief and charm rolled into one breathtaking expression. The cutest smile humanity had ever seen, or so it felt in that moment.

You sighed, tilting your head to the left, then the right, your disappointment on full display. “Asshole,” you muttered, your voice carrying just enough edge to sell the act.

But deep down, in the space you guarded most fiercely, you couldn’t have been happier.

ㅤ♡ The man is an absolute menace in the kitchen. He makes a huge mess every time he cooks but insists it’s “part of the creative process.” (The food is always delicious, though. You can’t even be mad.)

ㅤ♡ He buys you flowers randomly, but not the typical roses. He’ll show up with a weird mix, like sunflowers and baby’s breath, saying, “This one reminded me of your smile.” (You secretly press and save every single flower.)

ㅤ♡ A firm believer in PDA. He’s got a hand on your waist at all times. One time, a stranger commented on how affectionate he is, and Luigi smirked, “Can’t help it. She’s irresistible.”

ㅤ♡ You once joked about him doing your makeup, and he took it as a personal challenge. He watched three YouTube tutorials and showed up with a fully stocked Sephora bag. (He tried his best. It was bad. But you loved him for it.)

ㅤ♡ Absolutely melts if you wear his clothes. Walk into the room in one of his shirts, and he’s done for. “Yeah, we’re not leaving the house today,” he says as he picks you up and throws you on the bed. (RIP your plans and your legs.)

ㅤ♡ When you’re upset, he sits next to you quietly until you’re ready to talk. No prying, no pressure—just his presence. But the second you say what’s wrong, he’s already figuring out how to fix it.

ㅤ♡ He has a whole notes app list of “things she likes,” where he writes down random stuff you mention. Favorite snacks, dream destinations, weird obsessions—he’s got it all.

ㅤ♡ Once, during an argument, you jokingly said, “What are you gonna do? Leave me?” and he dead-serious replied, “Don’t even joke about that. ”

ㅤ♡ Hates shopping for himself but LOVES spoiling you. If he sees you eyeing something, it’s yours. “You deserve it,” he says, even if it’s something silly like a $25 glitter pen.

ㅤ♡ Swears he’s a big, tough guy but turns into absolute mush around kids. He’ll let them climb all over him like he’s a jungle gym. (You’re not saying it out loud, but yeah, you’re mentally baby-trapping yourself.)

ㅤ♡ Insists on celebrating every tiny milestone in your relationship. “It’s been 100 days since we had our first pizza together!” (You love him for it. Even when you’re rolling your eyes.)

ㅤ♡ One time, you were drunk and jokingly said, “You could totally ruin me, and I’d still thank you,” and he just leaned in and said, “Careful what you wish for, sweetheart.” (You did not walk the next day. The prophecy fulfilled itself.)

ㅤ♡ Every night before bed, he pulls you into his arms and says, “I love you more than yesterday.” It’s cheesy. It’s perfect.

[sammakesart]

Solavellan, or the Tale of the Dread Bridegroom

The reason I have always been drawn to the Solas and Lavellan romance in the Dragon Age series (besides having a deep love for villains and dramatic cheekbones) is because it brings to mind my favorite type of fairytale: the animal (or monster) bridegroom. The most famous of these would probably be Beauty and the Beast. However, the Solavellan romance felt more similar to my favorite iteration of this type: East of the Sun and West of the Moon. 

In the tale, a young woman is married to a monster… or so she thinks. He is keeping his true identity a secret from her. He brings her to an enchanted castle, and everything is actually pretty great for a time. Then she grows too curious. She discovers his true identity—he’s an attractive man! And a prince! He is forced to leave her and return to his evil witch-queen stepmother. Our heroine, who has fallen in love with her revealed prince, sets out to find him and save him from his wicked stepmother. She has to make a perilous journey. She faces trials and tribulations. She frees her prince, breaks the curse, and they leave together to live happily ever after.

There is also another tale that has many parallels to the Solavellan romance. The myth of Eros and Psyche, which is the blueprint for the animal bridegroom tales. It follows the same general plot, but I’d like to highlight a few differences. This is a myth about a god falling in love with a mortal, and that mortal becoming a goddess herself in the end after proving herself and winning her god-husband back.

In the myth, Eros is sent by his mother, Aphrodite, to trick Psyche into falling in love with something hideous for a perceived infraction against the goddess. Basically, Psyche had too many admirers who were worshiping her as the second coming of Aphrodite. Eros falls in love with Psyche instead, and spirits her away to a castle. She discovers his true identity. He flees. She faces trials. Etc and so forth. Eros and Psyche are reunited. She is given the drink of immortality, and joins her husband in the realm of the gods as a goddess in her own right so they can be together as equals.

It was the kind of ending I wanted for Solas and Lavellan. A heroine falls in love with a cursed prince and saves him. A mortal falls in love with a god, a doomed by the narrative pairing if there ever was one, but in the end, she triumphs, and she joins him as his equal.

Those are very simplified synopses, but you can see the parallels. Solas, in a reversal of the beast-husband trope, is keeping half of his identity secret from Lavellan, but it’s the beast (the Dread Wolf) side of himself he is keeping a secret. He takes Lavellan to his castle, Skyhold. They begin to fall in love. They kiss in a dream. They kiss on a balcony. They dance at a ball. Very fairy tale romance. They’re happy. Until they’re not.

When our heroine discovers Solas’s true identity, that he is Fen’Harel, the Dread Wolf himself (who does indeed turn into a giant wolf monster as we see in Veilguard), he must leave our heroine, and she cannot join him. What can Lavellan do? Well, swear to save him, of course! And if that is what she chooses, she sets out on her own journey of trials and tribulations to rescue her monstrous prince. But he is not just the prince or the monster, he’s the villain as well. Delicious.

Lavellan is Solas’s heroine, his knight in shining armor. Funnily enough, you can make a joke about “riding in on a shining steed” to Solas during an early conversation with him. She can also flirt with him later during this conversation. What is that flirt option? “You can trust me.” She tells him she will protect him… however she has to. Solas here is the damsel in distress, the prince who needs saving, and she will save her prince from his tower (or his regret prison) however she has to.

What trials does our heroine have to face, you ask? Besides the tracking him down, of course. Well, let’s see. Trials always come in threes.

Three times Lavellan reaches out to him, and asks him to stop. She tells him that whatever he is facing, they can face it together. “Whatever you need, we can find together.” “Let me help you, Solas.” “I am walking the dinan’shiral with you.” And it’s like he’s under a curse to reject her, but every time he reminds her he loves her, because he wants to be saved. He wants to be with her. “I cannot do that.” He does love her. “I wish it could, vhenan.” He wants their love to triumph. “Ir abelas, vhenan. I cannot.” One more time, my heart. Ask me one more time. He is under a geas, but screaming as loud as it will let him: Save me! I love you!

(I do not think he is under a literal geas in the story. It is more of a psychological one, one he has put himself under to justify his wrongdoings to himself.)

It also is very fitting that the rule of three is what it takes to stop him: Mythal, Rook, and Lavellan. Past, present, and future. Though it was Lavellan who found the first statue which kicked off the quest, the spark of hope that he could be saved still.

It also appears that Solas reaches out to Lavellan three times on his own. He orchestrates a meeting in Crossroads to explain. He visits her in dreams, though from an endless distance. He sends her a letter, reaffirming his love for her and telling her he wanted to be with her, and that his feelings will never change.

So the fourth time she reaches out, after the (metaphorical) curse has been lifted, there is no rejection. She’s won. He only offers a warning. She must choose him freely and with full knowledge of what is to come. She does. They perform a wedding ceremony of their own making and share a bloody kiss. Peak cinema.

It’s a darker fairytale, where the heroine falls for the prince, the monster, and the evil sorcerer all in one. And she wins. She gets everything she wants.

I’m just very passionate about fairytales. I wrote many a paper on them in college. Nothing pleases me more than a good retelling that captures the essence of what fairytales are truly about.

I think too many critics are trying to view Solas and Lavellan’s romance through the lens of a real life, modern day relationship. But fairytales are the realm of allegory, not reality.

We are in the realm of the mythic. Here be gods and monsters, princes and evil sorcerers. And Solas is all of those things. Lavellan is the heroine of all time who ends the story having saved the world (again), and is now ascending to godhood (there is an Andraste and the Maker parallel here, I swear), and she’s rescued her true love to top it all off.

I see a modern trend of no longer giving heroines love stories, and I dislike it. Because love stories in fiction are rarely ever about just finding a man. It’s about accepting the whole of yourself. I think of the heroine’s journey. The reconciliation with the masculine and the darker aspects of yourself. Women are told they must always be good. Make the right choices. Nah, let her fall in love with the villain and be selfish. Let her make out with her monster covered in blood as a treat.

I think monster romance has become so popular lately because, subconsciously, women feel like there is a monster inside of themselves that they have to hide from the world, lest you be judged for being imperfect, ugly, monstrous. Monster, and by extension villain, romance lets you fall in love with the dark other as the ultimate form of self-acceptance. (This is not an experience exclusive to women by any means, but I can only speak to my personal experience as one.)

Our heroine didn’t make the polite, respectable choice. She fell for the monster, the villain, and chose herself in the end. She didn’t choose a man. She wasn’t chasing after him, begging him to love her, in the hope of getting him back. She was pursuing him in her quest to stop him in order to save the world. She was just also in love with him and hoped he could be saved. Hope is a powerful thing, but this age has made people cynical. Let her have a little hope. Sometimes it’s all we have.

I do believe she would have killed him if she had to. And he would have killed her if given absolutely no other choice, or perhaps let her kill him for an extra layer of angst. Interestingly, I think Lavellan would have been able to live with that choice, but I don’t think Solas would have been able to. It would have destroyed him, fully twisted him into Pride, and he would have lost any hope of being able to “come back.”

I am fascinated by the fact that Lavellan and Solas are quintessential hero archetypes. The type that will not sacrifice the fate of world for their love, but will sacrifice their love for the world and for the “greater good”—as they see it. Only Solas has twisted himself into the villain. He’s a dark mirror of the hero. He is the hero, reversed. Thus, he dooms the world in attempting to save it. Repeatedly. (“He’s a tragic deuteragonist!” I scream, as they drag me away.)

Lavellan is the upright hero. She will save the day, or die trying. She will sacrifice her love, which is why I think it’s incorrect to say she gave everything up for him. She says in her second conversation with Rook that she would not join him in his Fade Prison. “To give up the world for him? No. We’ve got to save it first.” She will not give up everything for him. She will not doom the world to be with him. But after the world is saved… well, then. That’s a different story. She wants to be with him. And together, they can find balance.

They were both made and shaped into figureheads. Weapons. Legends. A hero and a villain. They’ve had the fate of the world on their shoulders multiple times over. There *is* no place for them in this world. But in another world... they can find their true selves away from well-meant misunderstanding and mindless worship. 

This is an apotheosis of Lavellan’s own choosing. I will not be your Herald. I will be a god on my own terms.

Solas never saw Lavellan as anyone other than who she is. He knew she was not the Herald, and he never treated her as such. He was uniquely able to understand her plight. He too had been given a title once and was later consumed by it. Dread Wolf.

Where else can two people like them go? Especially where they can be together in peace?

However, I don’t see this as the end for them. They are just onto the next adventure, this time together. And they’ll be unstoppable. The narrative had to make them exit stage left. No enemy could possibly win against them. They are too powerful. Lavellan is stronger than the narrative itself. The narrative had doomed her love, and she went: “No, I don’t accept that. I will save the world, win my prince/monster/villain, and now we’re leaving. Thanks!”

And Solas? We saw how devoted he was to Mythal. But Mythal never chose him. She twisted him into Pride. Used him as a weapon… and he destroyed the world for her. Twice. And was trying for a third. Just imagine what he could accomplish now with Lavellan, who chose him. Who encouraged him to be Wisdom. Who does not stand above him, as his goddess—but beside him, as his wife. Yeah, the writers had to put them in the Fade Prison. Their combined power was just too strong.

And I don’t believe for a minute they’ll be trapped in that regret prison forever. Solas tells us how to escape, and now he is in the right state of mind to accomplish it. Solas will do his court-ordered therapy. Lavellan will get a much needed vacation in dream land… then they’re going to heal the blight with the power of love. Or something. They just needed to be nerfed long enough for BioWare to squeeze a few more games out of the franchise. Then Solas and Lavellan will be set free to find a secret third option for the Veil, remove it safely, and Sandal’s prophecy will finally come true: “One day the magic will come back. All of it. Everyone will be just like they were. The shadows will part, the skies will open wide. When he rises, everyone will see.”

This is not to say I don’t have plenty of critiques for how Solas and Lavellan’s romance was written and concluded in Veilguard. But I think it was always going to be disappointing in some regards because it’s very difficult to conclude your heroine’s story from a new hero’s point of view in a new hero’s story. She will lack the agency she needs in this kind of tale because she has been relegated to a minor NPC, and she (and we) can hardly get a peak into Solas’s state of mind. How I wish we could have asked him endless insightful questions, instead of just pointing fingers. How I wish while Rook was in the prison, we could have controlled our Inquisitor for a quest or two and had a private conversation with Solas. The writing overall was a huge letdown for me. But I still love my once doomed couple, now together forever. I always will. 

[localwhiskeyuncle]

NBC Hannibal not being able to get the rights to Clarice Starling was honestly a blessing in disguise; they were able to take all the best part of both book!Will and Clarice and make the most glorious version of Will Graham possible and it gave us Hannibal's dynamic with Abigail.

Regarding Will - I loved both characters so dearly, so to have them combined is honestly such a treat. He has book!Will's mind and temperament, but Clarice's fire, drive, and sharp sense of humor. I'm not kidding when I say the absolute best bits of each of their personalities were put into TV!Will and my God does he shine it's no wonder Hannibal is obsessed with him.

In the books Hannibal sees the potential in both Will and Clarice, but he misses his chance with Will, he pushes him too far. When Clarice comes along and is just as quick, and damaged, and bright (but younger and easier to mold), he is determined not to let her slip through his fingers like Will did. So with the two characters being of such similar significance to Hannibal, it is so perfect to blend the two of them together and makes all the sense in the world why Hannibal is absolutely bonkers crazy about Will Graham in the show - he's the amalgamation of the two most fascinating, promising people he has ever met in the source material. The show takes his obsession with two people and puts all that passion into an obsession with one person and it becomes, I think, all the more interesting for it.

Book!Hannibal is obsessive anyway (drawing Clarice as Jesus on the watch face, drawing her as a griffon on the copy of The Tattler in Florence, keeping close tabs on her career from another fucking country for seven years, Clarice being pretty much the only person he talked to Barney about, sending Clarice random gifts, etc.) but to have all of that obsession turned onto one person is delicious because Hannibal clearly finds genuine emotional longing/desire to be sort of grotesque but he cannot help but hope.

They also put some of Clarice's character into Miriam Lass (obviously - I would also say that Miriam's circumstances are a parallel to Jame Gumb's victims), but even more important, they gave some of her character to Abigail.

The books baaaaaarely touch on the Shrike and definitely have no mention of Abigail (WHICH SIDE NOTE - since she exists only in this universe she should've been called Hannah it would've tied into the books soooo nicely bc that name holds significance to Clarice and therefore begins to hold significance for Hannibal), but Abigail has arguably one of the most important pieces of Clarice, the one that kept Hannibal's interest aflame even after years of no contact: the parallel to Mischa. In the books his interest in Clarice is, at first, as a surrogate for Mischa. He attributed his connection to Clarice as a connection to Mischa for the longest time, I think partially because it confused him to feel that way for another person. He has displayed empathy at multiple points in the novels but it still doesn’t necessarily come easy to him. Abigail quite obviously steps into the surrogate sister/daughter role in the show and it's interesting to see how that plays out when you very deliberately subtract the (eventual) romance from the equation.

I guess to sum it up while I love Clarice Starling so dearly I'm glad she was not able to be included bc we ended up with much more complex relationships with the characters that do exist in the show

[lambmotifz]

one of the most deliciously fucked up things kripke era spn ever did was making sam/mary parallels not only when it comes to the theme of craving safety & freedom from hunting/running away from abusive family but also in the context of their dynamics with john (john seeing his dead wife in sam) and azazel (mary…so far, she’s my favorite/sammy…you’re my favorite)

[trans-elrond]

why you, yes you, should read the Queen's Thief books

for #WinASignedSetofTheQueensThief2024, I am here to gently yet persuasively yell at you about why you should read the Queen's Thief books, in a helpfully numbered list (no spoilers, only vibes):

I like unreliable narrators. You like unreliable narrators. You know who the most unreliable narrator is? This scrunkly little guy, blorbo of all time, Eugenides (Gen). You're gonna fall in love with him. You're gonna want to throttle him. It's okay, it happens to us all. (official character art by Emily B. Martin isn't it gorgeous!!!)

Tumblrinas far and wide are known for our love of ancient Greek and Greek-inspired fantasylands. What if I told you that we could have it all (coastal Greek-esque kingdoms, political intrigue, The Gods Are Getting Involved) PLUS there are, occasionally, guns. Yes you heard that right. It's great. Come for the fantasy, stay for the Fantasy Guns(tm).

I could wax poetic about the female lead, Attolia Irene, for approximately 25 years without drawing breath, but suffice it to say she is THEE fantasy queen of all time. Her arc is incredible. I want to be her. I'm scared of her. I adore her. PLEASE read these books so you can also fall head over heels for her.

DYNAMICS!!!!!!!! we have ALL OF THEM. kings and queens and vassals and loyal advisors and scheming diplomats and brave soldiers and anxious scribes and we toss them into a blender and see what happens and who lands where. it is delicious.

Did I mention The Gods Are Getting Involved? the way these books weave the political reality & the godly, mythical, numinous aspects takes my breath away. Truly the blueprint.

Twists and turns that fly by like a rollercoaster. Truly, no one is doing the Plot Twist like MWT. You start out on these books and you think you know where they're going. yOU DO NOT. And you will be delighted every time.

Incredible prose, with occasional excerpts of poetry and song and myth that provide SUCH fertile ground for lore and worldbuilding and delicious, delicious Character Parallels. If you've ever been into classical reception even a smidge, you will rejoice at the plentiful references.

Bro's Road Trip of All Time (book 5) will knock your socks off. If you ever read Eagle of the Ninth, it's kind of like that, but got me even more good. deeply moving, I am never getting over them, (wails to the sky) I just want to be able to read this book for the first time again so YOU SHOULD TAKE THE CHANCE WHILE YOU HAVE IT

anyway, what are you waiting for, go read queen's thief, you will surely not regret it, what are you talking about these books ripped my heart out ha ha ha ha but i mean in a good & fun way okay enjoy!!!!!!!!

[nights-at-crystarium]

Fragments - episodes 47-52 author notes

You can find similar breakdown posts on older episodes in my pinned!

Time to recap the first proper wolgraha miniarc. See what you might’ve missed, or simply enjoy the extra content in form of my rambling.

47 stands out as a bit disconnected, floaty, introspective episode fully focusing on Exarch’s pov. I’ve scattered some breadcrumbs for him throughout the entire comic, time to pick those up. He may be an oblivious fool in certain moments, but I believe he wouldn’t keep insisting on staying deaf and blind when evidence’s shoved in his face. So, this moment of recollection and rethinking marks the start of the canon divergence, all of his future actions are colored by this.

Vivi has a dire effect on some people even without trying to manipulate them.

The composition forms a star here :3c

This panel should make their likeness even more obvious, they’re mirror reflections, albeit deliciously twisted ones. Also, the V sign is literally something that Vivi. Just. Does.

Exarch's heard from Vivi himself that they might be the same, Urianger literally tells him to go to a mirror and ponder, but when he does, and tries to look a bit more like he imagines Vivi, he can't stand what he sees in the mirror. They still aren't the same in his heart of hearts, even if reality itself tries to prove otherwise.

Hidden Angst Time! I can only hope that most readers are familiar with the flashback bubbles by now, and that this panel reads as it should: Feo Ul embraces Exarch while pointing out that they’re also being ostracized by their kind. Though the ultimate fae wisdom lies in accepting something the way it is, and just not caring too much.

More under the cut~ 

*rewinds all the way back to episode 1* hehe

“Does a hero have to be happy about his job” is one of my personal fav lines so far, I think it hits hard, pointing not only at Vivi, but at Exarch as well, and the visual supports it. I think this encapsulates Exarch’s ideology.

Exarch’s GASP could be interpreted as saying GASP out loud, which only makes it funnier.

Vivi carefully plans his entrance in order to make the atmosphere less formal. Approaching normally just wouldn’t do it. Also he just feels relaxed and safe to be silly. Remember how lowkey he was since his arrival to the First? His behavior all but contradicted what I said and showed about him in the ARR arc and outside of the comic.

Well, that’s in the past now. He’s finished assessing the situation and concluded that it’s okay to be more himself.

Feo Ul's upset that Exarch used his “radar” to detect Vivi’s ambush while they’d just used a similar ability to make sure that no emet-selchs are around.

If you catch a flirty vibe from Vivi in this episode, you're correct.

Vivi when he's remotely interested in a man:

My flavor of lampshading the obvious exposition dump. Oh Exarch, you asked for this, no take-backsies.

Another few hard-hitting questions from Exarch. It's easy to gloss over these, but if you slow down and think, it's decent angst material. Has anyone ever been concerned about Vivi's feelings, or was it more convenient to look away, even if intently, even if both sides knew they're better off not talking about that, for there's indeed no wol replacement. What good does acknowledging the situation if you can’t change it.

This's Vivi's memory, thus he appears small against the looming forms of the world leaders. Rigid, formal, impersonal. Raha's memories of the Ironworks seem to have a different vibe, despite all the parallels of the duty imposed by the world on one special guy. Also yeah I do wanna make my own version of the 8UC timeline and characters someday, for now these are just random characters that I consider as placeholders. And the dunmeshi cameo x’D

Yes, he mocks the people that he's saved. He's VERY frustrated with his job.

I offer you a fun game: spot all the mannerisms that make Vivi and Emet so alike. I genuinely never thought about this until this year, while this scene's pretty damn old, i.e. Vivi's always been like this, it precedes my Emet brainrot.

I swear that this line also was there before my Emet brainrot, but now it makes for a hilarious kind of foreshadowing.

You could already tell how "fit" he is for solving trolley problems.

This’s his “oops I talked too much shit” face.

The way Exarch just quietly TURNS and LOOKS at Vivi cracks me up. Don't undermine the tone with random jokes, dammit. But is this random? I’ve already analyzed this moment somewhere but for the sake of keeping important things in one place: they wrestle for control here. Exarch winds up for something serious, while Vivi wants to steer the convo towards more casual. It does somewhat lower the tension, though Exarch doesn’t relinquish his lead in the convo.

This doesn’t save him from becoming Frank forever from here on.

This miniarc’s rich with raw, hard-hitting words, so I’ll bring this up again.

We’re finally getting the explanation and context for a lot of previous episodes:

And the following episodes only help driving this point home. Vivi already sees the First as a viable escape from the Source with all of its shitty people and endless problems.

"This's why I... enjoy my time away from the Source": even at this seemingly high level of trust between them Vivi won't openly tell Exarch about his plans to stay here, a variable he doesn't want to become a risk.

Yes, he does an entirely calculated and strategic flop. A literal thirst trap.

Meme provided by my discord server:

Vivi casts provoke, it's..... not effective

^ This’s one of my personal fav exarchs I’ve ever drawn DADDY PLS

A panel that everyone loved to bits :>

I pair angst with other flavors to make it fun and non-repetitive. It's not "boohoo I can never kiss my hero, the world will end if I do, I'm so aggravated with myself", it's the hooded Exarch (duty) being mad at the unhooded Exarch (human), and delivering the same notion in a fun exchange. You can't help but laugh at the comical chibi violence, at the same time you acknowledge that it's a pretty fucked up act of suppressing one's innate human desires.

It's not a date, they just sit and talk <- the water in which Exarch is being slowly boiled.

I rarely talk about the visuals, but here I intended to make it look like a magical moment frozen in time. It's immersive, whimsical, full of color and movement. Despite the perceived warmth, the composition splits them apart, they're alone together. It’s still Raha’s pov, Vivi doesn’t seem to have any fond memories of the Source at all, we only hear about the past from his current jaded self.

An in-universe acknowledgment of the ARR arc lasting only 11 episodes x’D Though it’s all by design, it was meaningful only to Raha, while being a forgettable blip in time for Vivi.

Episode 52 opens with.... *drumroll*

NIP SLIP

I lovingly rendered that nip and I’ll make you look at it.

Ibuprofen meme would be the first thing that comes to mind, but consider the better/worse caption: "come to daddy". In all seriousness though, it’s a cool panel that I wanted to appreciate again. This IS Vivi’s pov.

The grimy beaten up Vivi creates questions that are answered in episode 53, which is yet to be released publicly at the moment of writing this. Some episodes, like 52-53 and 42-43, come in pairs that only make sense together due to the non-linear storytelling.

Yes this’s Aymeric, no I won’t say anything else :’> One thing that’s worth noting is the face Vivi makes here. And the distant, emotionless tone with which he recalls the moment of his own near-death.

Lemme spell it out even more plainly: Vivi romanticizes the moment he almost died. Exarch just happened to be present in that moment, and Vivi latched on to him as someone who would grant him escape, freedom, peace.

“A kindly wizard from fairytales”. I regret to inform you that we have two delusional fucks on our hands. Both see each other as some kinda dreamt up, idealized, mythical figures.

This miniarc isn’t over yet, but I’m wrapping up the recap here. Thanks for reading till the end~

[ilions-end]

so euripides' hecuba (david kovacs translation) was wilder than i thought it'd be

immediate thoughtssss:

i'm pretty familiar with the sacrifice of polyxena through other sources by now, although this is the first time i've seen her, you know, speak and try to wield whatever small amount of agency she is allowed in her own death. VERY strong iphigenia in aulis parallels. really chewing on the "the trojan war begins and ends with the ritual sacrifice of a young girl" concept

this IS the first time i've gotten to polydorus' whole deal beyond very brief summaries (and similar but different fate in the aeneid). i'll admit i'm a dumbass so i got really confused about the timeframes and the geography. the entirety of the greek army is (somewhere!) in THRACE but not at TROY anymore, but achilles' TOMB is within walking distance? and i assumed polymestor was supposed to be further away but he's right there in this temporary camp and... idk, confusion.

also i rarely mix up greek names but the fact that polydorus was murdered by polymestor. i keep tripping up, sorry

it's interesting that we learn agamemnon argued NOT to kill polyxena, and odysseus got everyone convinced anyway. between this and aulis and trojan women: odysseus just LOVES lobbying for the murder of women and children

SPEAKING OF odysseus, his interactions with hecuba in this were so different than what i'd imagined! for one, there is no clear indicator that hecuba is HIS slave. i for sure thought that'd be a major thing in this.

secondly, in this version HECUBA SAVED HIM THAT TIME HE CAME TO SPY IN TROY AS A BEGGAR? he supplicated her, she got him safely out of troy... ooh you're a WILY one euripides!

ESPECIALLY WHEN odysseus, Mister Hiketeia himself, PHYSICALLY BLOCKS polyxena from supplicating him so he won't be obligated to help her. CHRIST, man!!!

augh athenian odysseus, you are such a genuinely awful man and i need to dissect you with pins and study your insides

when hecuba begs to be sacrificed in polyxena's stead (because she's right! the greeks actually have a REASON to want her dead, as hector and paris' mother), and odysseus argues like, well WHAT would it look like if they'd treated achilles with respect in life but not in death? and i could FEEL ajax reaching out ghostly fingers to odysseus in that moment because he experienced the opposite (odysseus' enemy in life, then respected in death) and WHERE did that get him? just. mm. thoughts.

hecuba knows odysseus is also a parent........ it still doesn't help

RETURN OF TALTHYBIUS! a weeping, sympathetic agent of violence and outrage. he's so interesting to me. is he largely an invention of euripides i wonder? i should look more into talthybius

i understand the need to make polyxena's death as noble as possible, but it did weird me out when talthybius assured hecuba that even as polyxena fell to the ground with a slit throat, she carefully minded her skirt so she wouldn't expose herself in her death throes

POSSIBLY the most sympathetic-acting agamemnon i've come across in these plays? even if all his sympathies and concern for hecuba is implied to be because she is a kind of pseudo-mother-in-law now that he "cares about" cassandra so much... which is, you know, it's own kind of fucked up. euripides absolutely downplays the non-consensuality of that relationship so agamemnon can serve as an agent of justice

okay, it is kind of delicious when agamemnon is like "a WOMAN kill a MAN??? PSSH as if that could ever happen". sir. sir.

how old are polymestor's children meant to be? they're young enough to be "passed between" the enslaved women but polymestor brings them to a soldier camp

if i had a nickel for every time someone had their eyes stabbed out with brooch pins in ancient greek tragedy i'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but--

i like the visual of polymestor "crawling like a beast" though. fuck you polymestor

and then there's the FAKEST trial because agamemnon pretends to be impartial? THAT was a twist

i couldn't supress a disbelieving chuckle when polymestor's like "oh by the way i have these incredibly specific prophecies given to me by dionysus at an unspecified earlier time. yeah so hecuba you're gonna turn into a dog in just a little while. and agamemnon, just so you know, clytemnestra's gonna kill you and cassandra as soon as you get home"

and of course agamemnon doesn't believe him but i have to wonder as he's getting chopped up later he's like "huh. why does this seem so familiar"

i don't know, man. this play was no trojan women.

[dailydragon08]

The TF Boys Realizing You're Not Doing Well/Falling into Burnout

Gender neutral reader Warnings: reader struggling with mental health issues/burnout (nothing described). A/N: Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated. Enjoy!

*

Frankie would 100% organize an entire staycation for you. You’re both gonna spend the entire week in PJs and/or hoodies and sweatpants—and if you don’t have enough of those to last the week, he already ordered you more made out of the softest, most cloud-like material you’ve ever encountered. He’s got the living room all decked out to watch movies, play games, read, whatever: there are a million pillows and soft blankets everywhere, if cozy candles and string lights are your thing he’s got those up everywhere. He’s determined that you don’t get up for anything and is bringing you all the food, beverages, and items you could possibly need (unless you want to get up, of course). All cell phones and social media notifications are getting turned off so his focus can be entirely on you and you’re going to make your place your own little private, stress-free corner of the world where you can do whatever you need to decompress.

I headcanon Santi as showing his love through food. He gives me loves to cook vibes and is making sure you’re getting all the most delicious, nutritious, home-cooked meals—and you know he’s throwing stuff in there like “my family used to make this for me when I was struggling and it always helped, so now I’ve made it for you.” He’ll even make you a homemade latte and/or the best hot chocolate you’ve ever had in your entire life (seriously, even your favorite coffee shop doesn’t do it this well). If you have a favorite restaurant and are up to go, he’ll take you out with no hesitation or pick up their takeout and deliver it to you himself. He’s very attentive and learned all your favorite recipes forever ago and has them all on standby, joking about how he’s your chef and waiter all in one and you just tell him what you want to eat and he’ll make it for you. Once you put your “order” in, he’ll give you a little salute with a “you got it, sweetheart” before marching off to the kitchen (and if you’re up for helping him and want to, he’s so happy that he has a cooking buddy). He’s very determined that for the next month at least—maybe longer—you won’t have to worry about a single meal and he’s gonna be your personal chef.

I know a lot of people headcanon Benny as neurodivergent and struggling with mental health issues and I do, too, so I think he’d 100% understand any sort of burnout and is already well-equipped to deal with it. He’s buying you all the fidget toys, all the mandala coloring books with the fancy marker sets, the lightest and softest noise-canceling headphones, etc. If you need to blow off some steam instead, he’s taking you ax/knife throwing, playing some sports or heading to the gym with you, taking you to the shooting range, etc. Whether you want something like that or something more relaxing at home, he makes sure you have all the things you need to get in some good decompression time and is more than happy to just hang out in the same space with no expectations to enjoy some parallel play.

Because of Benny and his own experiences with PTSD, I think Will would also be super understanding of your experience and he’s now completely committed to being your doctor/therapist/whatever you need to get through this. Like Benny, he’s happy to buy you all the things you need and is also researching coping mechanisms, breathing techniques, and how your mental health issue/neurodivergence might present so he can best help you. Of course, he’ll ask clarifying questions to make sure your “treatment plan” is perfectly tailored to you while sprinkling in things he learned in therapy himself that he feels would be helpful. He’s a big proponent of exercise and I think he’d be really supportive of helping you learn something like yoga or tai-chi or meditation (but of course would never shame you if those weren’t your thing or if you tried it and it didn’t work for you). I think he’d also suggest a camping trip, just the two of you, to get some time out in nature away from other people to de-stress and reset if that was your thing as well, and he’s taking care of all household chores and making sure you get enough water and nutrients before you can even blink.

[the-invisibility-bloke]

001 Sirius/Harry

Have a nice day😃

Oh you're gonna regret this. XD (But I hope you have a nice day too!)

When I started shipping it if I did: 2004? I think they were my first HP ship.

My thoughts: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

What makes me happy about them: THEY SAVE EACH OTHER'S LIVES ON THEIR FIRST AND LAST NIGHTS TOGETHER, RESPECTIVELY. TELL ME ANYTHING MORE ROMANTIC THAN THAT. Also, found family in a sense, but better yet, they were given to each other by James and Lily, and their chemistry from the very beginning is everything, they are so utterly devoted to each other, so thrilled to be in each other's lives, so love-starved and touch-starved, they are each other's links to their past as well as each other's hope for the future. All they want is to care for each other, it's so fucking beautiful it hurts, and the reason it's so fucking hot and just the right amount of sweetly toxic is because they have no fucking boundaries, Harry was raised in abject neglect (so was Sirius, in his own way) and Sirius spent those years in prison so they suffered on parallel timelines and now here they are, a collision of orbits, perfect complements, where Harry was forced to grow up too fast and Sirius' life stopped at 21 so the power imbalance is skewed and fucky and all the lines get blurred because they simply need so desperately, the hunger and yearning, but also the fact they just get each other. They tick each other's boxes, fill all the voids, the need to protect, to be protected, and it's no secret this man was Harry's sexual awakening, a not-father figure but the first man to step up and fill those role model shoes, with his tattoos and his recklessness and his general sexiness/coolness making him unlike any adult who's ever shown Harry affection, not to mention the yummy angst of Past Prongsfoot™, so extra guilt for Sirius there, but more significantly, he very quickly comes to see Harry as his own person. I think he's the first one to see that the similarities to James are less than the differences, and more beautiful for that, and I think it would be a bit terrifying for him to realize he's fallen for Harry as himself and not as a replacement, because now he has no excuse, he can't write it off as an inevitability of loving James. ...Anyway.

What makes me sad about them: HE FUCKING DIES.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: I'd share in DMs, but as someone with the world's lowest self esteem, I never want to discourage anyone from writing what they love.

Things I look for in fanfic: I love canon-compliant or canon-adjacent, desperation and codependency, Harry being first ashamed and afraid of rejection, then when he knows he's got him, shameless about what he wants. I love Sirius being tortured by his own guilt until the explosive breaking point where he loses all self control. OOTP era is my favorite because they're in close physical proximity and there are Opportunities, okay, OPPORTUNITIES. Late-night fireside chats (snogs), Harry slipping into Sirius' room under pretense of nightmares, come on, it fucking writes itself. I'll read the occasional Sirius Lives (just wrote one, in fact), but part of me kinda loves that he dies, because it enables all my OTPs to exist in tandem, case in point...

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Sirius? No one. He's gone for that boy and he dies loving him. But 20 years later, Harry falls for Teddy and is wracked with the most delicious guilt. Is he projecting the godfather-godson dynamic he so brutally lost with Sirius? (No, but the guilt is fun!) I also like the premise of Harry and Draco falling into each other post-divorce, better late than never, but after a lifetime of competing for Teddy's attention, godfather vs cousin, turns out the boy's kind of in love with them both, so H/D/T OT3 is my jam.

My happily ever after for them: Sirius lives, obviously. But I want to write a fic where, after the war, Harry obsessively dedicates himself to working out the mysteries of the veil and getting Sirius back. He succeeds some 20 years later, right after he finally decides to leave the past behind and embrace the present, where his own lovely godson has been madly in love with him for years. So basically he gets Sirius back right after he and Teddy begin a relationship, thus it ends up Sirry+Teddy OT3, but this is where multishipping hits a brick wall because what about Draco. OT4?

who is the big spoon/little spoon: I'm dully traditional and default to whoever's bigger (Sirius), but I think they wake up fairly often with Harry clinging to his back, all nestled in like a cute little parasite.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Motorbike rides, pickup Quidditch, Muggle video games, and I think they like to travel. Harry never did, growing up, and after all those years in Azkaban... yeah. Gay cross-gen wizards take on the world.

[nabi-unveiled]

Episode 4 of Secret Relationships was a whole lot of fun now that I've settled into this is pure makjang mode. Makjang isn't meant to be taken seriously. It can still have symbols and parallels, and this one definitely does. However, I expect narrative inconsistencies, questionable character portrayals, and just a whole bunch of nonsensical shenanigans when I approach a makjang.

As I predicted, Sung-hyun is still crossing boundaries. Da-on is dead-ass drunk, and Sung-hyun knows it. We also know that Sung-hyun is NOT drunk himself. Green flag? I think not.

But the show obviously doesn't paint this (or his confession when Da-on is having a hard time) as problematic.

Which confirms a lot of what I pointed out in my deep dive of the first three episodes. He's our "good boy" who is not really all good, but we'll pretend is all good for the sake of our narrative. The show gods and his grandma believe in his goodness after all.

We now know where Su-hyeon gets his violent streak from.

And we could quibble over whether violence is ever warranted, but....

it wasn't NOT warranted in this situation. Definitely reasonable by makjang drama standards. Actually, by most drama standards.

Punching Jae-min was reasonable too.

It almost makes up for you being a bit of a pathetic loser Su-hyeon.

Really? Calling everyone to a meeting for this? You couldn't even manage a good bluff to make it look legit? You do not deserve this company.

Jae-min is being my kind of sexy villain as he moves around his chess pieces in his fabulous fits. Seriously, I might should question how attractive I find this man. (in FICTION people, don't come at me)

He makes deliciously unhinged statements that are way more threatening than Su-hyeon's rage,

Pulls villain moves straight out of Peach Girl (Side note - I was talking about the naked pictures, but there's a really stupid agreement that leads to fake dating between the villain and side character to prevent the side from dating the lead in that show too),

And we are going to get to watch him slowly lose control as evidenced by this great mirror cracking shot. Delightful.

Da-on's sister has Jae-min's number. Glad someone does.

But why doesn't Da-on let sis live with him? It's out of character for Da-on, and he admits he's lonely.

Jae-min is behind that decision one way or another. I'd lay bets.

However, maybe not. I obviously missed the memo on some things...like the significance of this blue handkerchief.

Did I miss it? It's possible. I know the importance of the OTHER handkerchief.

But it could also be inconsistent or poor writing. Because Mr. Jung Da-on who ALWAYS comes to the company parties (except for Sung-hyun's welcome) and ALWAYS takes care of his team mates (according to ep 1)....

That same man - he's now causing shockwaves because he's taking care of his team member and drinking with everyone.

Note - I actually think this is probably meant to convey that Sung-hyun is special. There's also probably nuance being lost in translation. But it's still muddled writing from where I sit.

But I no longer care, because this is a makjang and Da-on is ALSO getting assertive and handsy. He's the one that grabs Sung-hyun's arm in this episode to lead him away.

He puts his hand on his shoulder as he serves as Sung-hyun's black knight. I do love the black knight/black rose trope.

He also makes a gif-worthy block of his man to prevent him from drinking any more liquor. I really need to learn how to make GIFs.

And he initiates that kiss....not that Sung-hyun offered ANY resistance.

Da-on's actions are speaking, Now if only Da-on's actual dialogue made any sense to me.

But WHY shouldn't you have said it sweetie? There are at least five SOLID possible meanings behind this statement that I thought of without even pausing.

And why are you asking such a weird question Sung-hyun? The man hasn't done THAT much for you. And Da-on's response? We're back to muddled land. There's about 10 different ways I can interpret that statement without breaking a sweat.

In the end, we are left to wonder...how will Sung-hyun respond?

Because that definitely wasn't his name that got called in the middle of their dubcon make-out session.

Hmm.

But the real question is ....should I go back and look for the blue handkerchief or should I let it go?

Decisions. Decisions.

[starlightswordfight]

everyone needs their really specific headcanon over their randomly selected character that gets like two lines total and this is mine. delicious in dungeon more like DISSOCIATIVE IDENTITY DISORDER (I get hit by a car)

holm kranom DID essay post incoming right now EVERYONE is getting GLIMPSES into MY BEAUTIFUL MIND. it's also REALLY long that's my bad I have Favorite Character Disease. get ready

ALRIGHT !! my telekinesis throws everyone against the wall

so this party just dies, right. cannot stop dying. allergic to victory all they do is lose. so they attempt to go back up to the surface after arguing a little with kabru about it, the corpse retrievers try to turn them all against each other, everybody looks like different kinds of mermen because of illusion magic, that is the part of the story I'm talking about below okay YAY

SO I NOTICED. A GOOD FEW THINGS IN THIS SCENE. went back to the manga to make sure it wasn't me like ... overthinking it, but I really don't think it is

this panel ALONE gives a lot of things to work with:

1) kabru is very obviously a super perceptive person. it's interesting to me fascinating even that the most glaring observation he can make about holm is that he freezes under stress. he does it frequently enough for it to be considered noteworthy

2) the anime also doesn't say this verbatim but here it is SPECIFICALLY described as him being "dazed". it is not just freezing up like when you're surprised, it is dissociation. and this is apparently happening with holm all the damn time

3) the sea creature his illusion was modeled after is a cuttlefish. and that stands out a lot to me

cuttlefish are known for "freezing out" predators, and for camouflage. the type of camouflage you would inherently be doing if you had a covert disorder like DID. the entire point is that you are not supposed to find out about it unless you really go looking

it is a covert disorder that you either discover long after the fact, or in some cases, never. and that could so nicely parallel the fact that cuttlefish, despite being so good at color matching to blend in to their environments, are colorblind

^ (cuttlefish are also remarked by some as "chameleons of the sea" and his name in old english means "sea" or something similar iirc. something something chameleon of the self. something something blending in as one person, the constant looming feeling that you're pretending to be yourself, other alters imitating the host SEE MY VISION NOW)

and also they have THREE HEARTS?? OKAY MAN

still on this scene listen I AM onto something just bear w me. in this same part the accessories or weapons of some of the party members are visible, and you can see that they weren't transformed into other fish/marine life!

like kuro's sword! and rin's staff!

they were not altered extensively by the illusion, just enough to look slightly different. and clothing wasn't considered an issue at all, and would just not impact anyone else's "forms" altogether!

this does not apply to holm.

the hat is a completely different animal.

not much reason the illusion would only do something like that for holm, I feel like. even if I'm reading into it too much (I know I am and idgaf), the fact that holm is made two sea creatures while everyone else stays one is a detail I can't let go of

furthermore: consider the stress responses! and how these specific animals will defend themselves! the cuttlefish freezes when threatened. a jellyfish will sting on contact. do you see where I'm going with this

this also is more speculation than anything else, but I think it'd make a lot of sense if him being religious (though we don't ever figure out WHAT specifically, my personal interpretation is whatever this world's equivalent of Judaism is but anything goes) had something to do with being a healer. and his magic practices. and even if not, in most religions, from what I understand, harming others -- particularly killing others -- is the worst thing you could ever fucking do. right

but AFTER the illusion spell wears off -- which, again, he was frozen for the entire time. just Standing There. -- and kabru fakes out then kills the corpse retrievers? ALL holm says is "yeah, that makes more sense". not particularly happy, but not upset at all, either. unbothered

and that is baffling to hear from a healer, particularly a religious healer. the dungeon plays by different rules sure but it feels like he should have had more qualms with that, but he just. doesn't? something is happening here. I don't think it's just hypocrisy that would be too easy. there's something more going on

EXPANDING on that: he can be. super judgemental ?? despite how otherwise gentle he is. it feels jarring. can you be normal

like this part right here?? him just SAYING this about mickbell?? and like yeah he was right but his reasoning was based on NOTHING. just Intuition. "this is correct Because I Just Know"

the way daya goes "holm." made me giggle to be honest. but it could still be important!! she says this like she's had to say it before, like he's Done This Before Multiple Times

oh oh and and AND. in the anime his word choice is different, somehow harsher ("I bet he's working the poor thing to the bone for peanuts") and his voice changes entirely, in tone, in pitch, in cadence.

I understand that acting ooc on its own doesn't mean anything, but I also had to rewind this part initially because I wasn't actively watching and didn't recognize the voice!! here he doesn't speak softly like holm normally does, at all. like he's quiet, still, but it's not the same. almost like he isn't holm. a jellyfish will sting when threatened

OH AND THIS PART. THE PROTECTIVE SPELL THAT RIN LOOKED OVER

it makes absolute sense that that's her specialty and not anybody else's, and that she would know the most about this particular kind of spell! so true rin I LOVE you rin

but a cleric -- a healer who has also been seen resurrecting people in this series -- has absolutely no reason not to know at least a little bit about this sort of thing

in the anime he says it's just not his area of expertise. okay sure, fine, I'll take that. the manga?

"I don't really know much."

fuck you mean you don't know much?? at ALL???? mf yes you do???????

I can't do this "yeah I know that I, as someone who Is A Cleric and Revives People In Dungeons, would have to understand how ghosts function In Those Dungeons to be able to do my job at all. I DON'T know anything about this spell warding off ghosts though. in fact I could not even estimate" SO TRUE HOLM I BELIEVE YOU

like I understand that it's not EXACTLY the same. and obviously it's not like a huge deal. but I have a really hard time believing that someone who also knows enough about ancient magic to have been arrested for it can't look at a simple defensive spell and take a wild guess

this is also the exact same group interaction where he says that shit about mickbell. and his voice kind of slips. and he can still think harsh things sometimes but I think this might be the only time he actually voices that thought. which is notable to me (since in other situations, like judging kabru for eating harpy eggs, he doesn't say what he's thinking. but there not only does holm talk, he doesn't even bother trying to sound how he usually speaks)

in this entire sequence of events we get:

– a healer who knows all about resurrection and healing but apparently nothing about protective spells? particularly protective spells against ghosts (despite again his whole thing being HEALING AND REVIVAL MAGIC which would HAVE to be a little knowledgeable on that so he was just fucking lying maybe)

– an abrupt compete shift in character that happens for about one second and then we never see that again

– this behavior taking place directly after a life threatening experience, which he had stood dead still for the entire time. the illusion had presented the image of a separate animal from a separate phylum attached to his person, specifically attached to his HEAD

– and when he's talking again suddenly he doesn't care one way or the other if kabru permanently kills someone, suddenly he's clueless on defensive magic, suddenly he's reading mickbell in bad faith, suddenly he's eating meat despite being vegetarian for religious reasons (if you choose to take that as anything other than an animation error) (because it IS an animation error 100%)

that was somebody else. like that just was not holm. in my eyes this is whoever the jellyfish could potentially represent, and they were just Standing There during the illusion shenanigans before this scene because they were switching

then considering his quiet demeanor, and his tired face (which when you look at the designs for all the characters as other races via changeling spores, that tired look FOLLOWS holm. it is not just because he's a gnome, that is how he emotes). like

okay man. he's had maybe two hours of sleep in the last nine hundred years

regardless of the scenario he is way too calm. being that serene AND just locking up when you're taken off guard ?? could very well be connected. for someone who looks so calm he sure does get overwhelmed very weirdly quickly

and despite that tired look to him, holm is observant. very observant. he can engage with kabru's theorizing enough to argue back, strongly, easily. there is a back and forth with holm between noticing even the smallest details and then not engaging with anything around him whatsoever

and I already talked about how out of nowhere it felt to see him get so harsh, but building on that: him seeming ... a lot less indifferent (and more worried) than he tries to sound? he can be really mean when he wants to be. making a lot of fast judgements, but most if not all of them seem related to whether or not he can trust these people. "I bet mickbell is taking full advantage of kuro", "kabru would do anything to gain somebody's trust/yeah I completely expected him to backstab the corpse retrievers", these are people he WORKS with. their LIVES are all in each other's hands and this is where his mind is

reminiscent of hypervigilance, almost. the constant back and forth you'll see in dissociative disorders like this one between painful awareness and just completely shutting down. never really knowing who to trust so you're wary of everyone, but end up associating with those people anyway out of necessity. so you're always on guard, even if you care for these people, because you've never been given a reason not to be

we don't hear anything about his parents. zero. nothing. we know he has a sister that he's on rocky terms with, for reasons we don't get to hear. we know he's been imprisoned before in the west for his studies of ancient spirit magic for Lord knows how long (like what do you MEAN you were fucking imprisoned for ancient magic?? and you got OUT?? what are you DOING??)

and we know (because holm is 76 and the maturity age for gnomes is like 40) that all things considered he was very young when all of that went down. and people do not just gravitate towards ancient magic for no reason, especially not young people. and that's ... it! that's it?

it's such a patchy backstory in terms of missing so many key details. everyone else's in his party seems mostly consistent (as in there's at least a linear story, somewhere, anywhere) but his is bits and pieces. from holm there is just ... nothing? I'm supposed to believe that he's just Also There? something is deeply wrong

with dissociative disorders (and trauma-based ones) your memory will just be god awful. important years and times will just be blocked out, or fuzzy at absolute best. recollection is choppy, inconsistent. it is very very common for bits and pieces of childhood to be remembered and absolutely nothing else, if you even get those snippets at all

he isn't very personal or talkative, but there are characters who aren't talkative (daya as one example) that we as the audience still learn the lore for. not him! he's just Here for like No Reason, as far as we can tell, and the complete lack of linear backstory so sincerely could be a matter of not remembering anything. or not being able to think about it for too long. forcible switch out every time he tries

my Proposed Theory: he is not the party's Resident Normal, there is no Resident Normal, he just blocked all that shit out. he freezes when overwhelmed as is, already, CANONICALLY, I don't see why that wouldn't bleed into this too. I could easily see him trying to share personal things like the others do then just blanking immediately

"-- so that's how the mana absorption works with undines :]"

"so true holm. why don't you tell me more about yourself"

" "

"okay"

and this last part is not even an attempt at justifying any of this it's just a reason I'm so attached. I adore the idea of a character being a system and also being a healer. and being softer. and being gentle.

not only do characters w DID very often get exaggerated to extreme degrees and completely ignore the covert part, but I'm tired of the only systems we see in media being overall violent. or having one designated violent alter for the sake of scaring the neurotypicals since we are seen as our own subgenre of horror. I want to see a character who's calm and careful have this disorder for once. for once

always "serial killer with DID" this, "violent outbursts from person with DID" that, how about healer with DID. system in the party that brings people back to life. system that is careful and gentle and values safety. system that loves other people and loves when people Live And Are Cared For and is NOT a murderer waiting to happen good Lord the bar is low

this specific headcanon means a lot to me because I feel like this being what's going on with him could hold weight. it is possible. I have more but I don't want to write for way too long and that one is more speculation than canon. people with good childhoods don't stand like that

TL/DR this character is fucked up. in my heart. I know what he is. peace on planet earth

also I'm giving him two (2) alters as a treat and their names are llewellyn and dorset (NOT A TREAT) (THIS IS REALLY BAD ACTUALLY)

[brilliantfantasticgeronimo]

thought to myself u know what. i havent watched falsettos enough. so here's a couple things i noticed in my latest impromptu rewatch (rewatch number 52th probably?? 67th?) + just some nice bits n parallel that are always Good (tm):

"he loves another" "i agree" with ("-man") going unsaid

the chess games following trina's song about stupid men and their little games

"that's the king. please protect him" That's marvin saying "please protect me. don't hurt me"

whizzer moves the pieces randomly in the revival but i like to imagine he's actually beating marvin at the game in the end... and the whole thing was him pretending to not know how to play, and that hurt marvin's ego more than anything

"now marvin, bend" as a sexy moment but later gets re-framed as a "unwillingness to change perspective" moment

"nothing is everything to me / except sex / and money" in that money whizzer is playing to marvin's insecurity that he's only sticking with marvin for his money- is so needlessly cruel (and thus such... delicious character writing lol)

"and he loves me so" that "so" at the end is sort of a "loves me so much" but also a dare. he loves me, so what can you even do about that?"

"ask me if i love him, it depends on the day"// "do i love him?… no"

"son with a brain, and nice bright mother" showing mendel is like marvin (+ many, many men) and wants a wife half just to do domestic labor for him (goes well with the "washing your laundry, washing your socks!" line)

"he loves his father" // "i love things i never had"

"im everything he wanted" here trina finally realizes how she was such a insecure woman for such a long time and why she could put up with so much / settle for so little ("love me for what i am, not what i try to be" etc)

i love that "what ive done to you is rotten" is the slap to trina, is not taking to jason about his sexuality, and is Also telling trina and jason he "never ever, wanted to love" them. triple treat of bad parenting lol (but our man gets there in the end #bless him)

"a man kid, you'll be kid, whatever your song" the kind of reversed coming out metaphor of it all. ugh. so good!! (also i always cry at this bit bc... i will never have this with my parents :) rip haha whoops)

"pretty boys are in demand" just a good line for the whole gay men dying everywhere + the 'dating frenzy' energy of the era

"im not a giant man" /"good" // "one day i hope to be / as mature as my son who is 12 and a half / and this tall… that's all i want to be, that's all"

"we'll spent BILLIONS of dollars" and then the actual thing plays the way it does

"making the most pathetical errors" as a metaphor for marvin's arc…. making constant errors in love but making a homerun at the end

"should i take this new promotion OR should i take this IBM job?" is an amazing, anti-corporate lyric that fits greatly w/ the most explicitly political (likely authorial) song in the musical that, imho, shouldn't have been cut in the revival. in hindsight tho i imagine the revival people felt very proud and """progressive""" when they made that cut lol is very much a typical liberal move: "cant have true emancipation or revolutions but u cant have some \~upward mobility in the job market xoxo". also on the same vein, cutting the line "i'll change my life, and hire a maid" from the og "and fire the maid" like it's this huge feminist moment lol ughhhh hh

(other line-cuts that frustrate me… "it's queer, mr. marvin", "i could use a little drink" and "i just bought a family" . i feel w/ all of these they tooks some "edge" of the OG characters and kind of attempted to make them "nicer". but it really just makes them a little flatter, a little less real) ( and also some scenes just plain make less sense (marvin's drink line leading to his outburst)

(but bc it's not All Bad sdklfj in fairness, i belie the whole "why don't we tell him, that we don't have the awnsers? (…) this is the start to his becoming a man" bit - is SUCH a great part for mendel, it goes so hard and from what i remember is not in the original falsettos? correct me if im wrong but if it was a new addition in the revival, imo it's a huge improvement to the scene flow… and dare i say, brings the whole climax together, and spells out The Aesop for people who hadn't gotten it by the end of Act 2) -"let me go, im not ashamed to have loved you" // "what's the matter trina, darling, why cant you let go?" -"feel all right for the rest of your life" The Message of the play implicit in it.. "even if it's cut short"

"you save lives, and i serve chicken fat / i can't fucking deal wit hthat" / "maybe is not dumb the way this whole thing ends / the food tastes really yummy!"

"it's about growing up, getting older, living on a lover's shoulder" /"but i confess, you grow up, you get old, you hate less"

"the ground shifting, the rules keeps changing" and it's when the set changes for the first time!!! (/eats all my walls)

"isn't it enough i love you every night?" "who?" // "we had trouble parking, just like on our second date" "i hyperventilate"

"good men never fail" // "but i can't help but feeling i've failed " proving once again those machista lessons marvin learned when young were wrong.... it's clear that him showing weakness at that moment to whizzer was The Right Thing To Do. and what the moment called for.

"the last little mountain ill climb" sound of music ref? maybe?

i only wanted to love and not be blamed " // "who would i blame my life on?"

[zombiecowboy65]

JEREMY KNOX DESERVES BETTER! He deserves a better family. He deserves better partners. He deserves not to feel like SHIT.

It’s not lost on me that Jeremy’s and Jean’s positions aren’t… too different if you think about it. Without looking at Jean’s specific abuse since that will get muddy, Jeremy is just as shackled by his family as Jean was by the Nest/Moriyama’s. Jean now has the most freedom he ever had in his life, while Jeremy is losing his freedom. Eventhough it seems opposite at face value, by the end of TGR, we see that Jeremy’s freedom is vanishing while Jean’s is being liberated. Of course, there are lots of differences between these two when it comes to their abuse and trauma, but at its core… it all stems from being forcibly shackled by another.

I’m screaming over these two and will yap yap yap. This whole time I thought Jeremy would show Jean that he is deserving but it seems it’ll be a mutual effort.

This isn’t an ask. Just wanted to yap hehe. Im a Jeremy Knox girly. 🤭

Pls always yap yap yap with me !!!

Also YES!!!!! I have been thinking about how similar they are since TSC, and of course now that we know more, the parallels are SO good. And also!!!! Jean’s freedom becoming more tangible while Jeremy’s slips away 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ if I could draw a chart on here I would but it would be so good. Like u have Jeremy with seemingly all this freedom and Jean with like 0 in book one, then in book two they’re almost even for a sec, and now as we slide toward book 3 it’s gonna flip their positions from book one. Delicious . Absolutely scrumptious I fear

Jeremy deserves the best and I literally can’t wait for him to get it 😫😫 need to see this man’s reaction to being touched and held gently

[lambmotifz]

tell me! when in your spn watch did you stop and went "huh" for those brothers? how was your journey to wincest land? 🤍

(gurl it's winpocalypse here unfortunately tumblr doesn't give sideblogs the power to send asks lol that's why i never send any :(

honestly, i got into wincest because of the mostly unpopular reasons—at the time i joined the fandom at least. most of the people were shipping it because of “sam being insane”, but i’ve always interpreted his “insane” actions in s3-4 as a consequence of trauma & guilt. i never saw sexual wincest as anything but a very much one sided dynamic & mostly coming from dean and his treatment/views of sam. i remember watching the show for the first time and being weirded tf out by how physically touchy and possessive towards sam he was. the way he’s obsessed with feminizing sam (which, turns out, was intentional because the writers openly & blatantly compared sam to a girl/wife in the context of their dynamic). dean basically claiming sam as his bitch in that one scene in prison (yeah that’s very brotherly ig). his smug smile when henriksen says sam is like bonnie to his clyde. he’s such a freak i love him :)

also playthings (of course). it was the first time when i’ve thought of the possibility of these two actually getting sexual. dean manhandles drunk sam on the bed and sam arches his back and pushes his ass out (completely obliviously mind you) and then the scene immediately cuts to dean looking at him with this…unreadable expression. i’ve never been the same after seeing playthings

ahbl was also a big part why i got into wincest. dean selling his soul & bringing sam back to life was one of the most romantic yet cruelest things he ever did: sam finally managed to “get out” of the life he never wanted (even if it meant dying), only to be forced back into it again because his obsessive brotherhusband can’t live without him. it’s so deliciously tragic but also romantic in a twisted dean coded way, i am forever in love with late s2-s3 angst

and then i watched sex & violence aka THE wincest episode. something something sam is a little brother but also a lover and a wife all in one (i giggled when they made a parallel between him and the woman who was killed by her husband while he was under the siren’s influence. kripke wasn’t even trying to be subtle!). sam is something dean desires most which could mean nothing, except the whole episode is extremely freudian & sexually charged and there are plenty of delicious metaphors

and then the show pretty much confirmed wincest to me with dean’s “whatever it is” ♡

[borgialucrezia]

do you ever think about the fact that in the show juan picked the woman that most closely resembled lucrezia (aka his own sister) to be his bride??!!? because sometimes I remember and i'm like MY GOD WHAT AN INSANE LITTLE DETAIL!! even cesare did not do *that*-- then again, ces was fully aware of his feelings for lucrezia being more than what a brother should feel for his sister, whereas juan was not. but his subconscious? definitely aware!! truly fucking wild. I love it.

delicious food like he wasn't even subtle was he? and this is us ignoring how he became a jealous sobbing mess upon seeing lucrezia kissing paolo lol. now let's delve into juan's wife's portrait. we know how maria historically looked or at least her features in case her portraits weren't too accurate. however in the show maria heavily resembles holliday's lucrezia like...the curly blond hair, full lips, big eyes, or chubby cheeks? this is definitely not a mistake especially considering how everything about this show leans heavily on subtext and metaphors!!

he's not even trying to hide it this point cause look at her...too uncanny like alright then juan!!

and bro was so extra especially when he asked for her permission to marry maria? there are layers to this like i appreciate how he's trying to make her smile but…

like why is he asking HER for permission to get married? insane!!!! stuff!!! no one ever did it like this family!!!! (i mean… do we even need to talk about how she purposely walked in on him fucking some girl instead he was excited to see his sister and pretended like everything was normal as if nothing weird or inappropriate was going on lol?)

speaking of cesare, i lowkey parallel this with when he became obsessed with ursula bonadeo, seduced her, and took advantage of her since he saw her as a surrogate for lucrezia, projecting his sister onto ursula. both juan and cesare are genuinely so unhinged when it comes to lucrezia like inject all this into my veins asap!!

amazing. showstopping. breathtaking. talented. brilliant. superb. never done before etc

[coldsaturn]

I finished my reread of TKM (in its Italian translation, for a change) in preparation for TGR, and I have thoughts

There's something inherently addictive about a character knowing they're on a countdown and trying to make the most of the time they still have

"I didn't tell her." They were the only two in the car, but it took Neil a moment to realize he was being addressed. He glanced over at Aaron, but Aaron was gazing out the passenger window. "Neither did I," Neil said. "She asked you about Andrew." It wasn't a question, but Neil said, "Yes. You too?" "She doesn't ask me anything anymore," Aaron said. "She knows there's no point. I haven't ever said a word to her." //Of course they hate each other so much, they're way more similar than they're comfortable with

Aaron, Matt, Renee, Wymack, e Andrew are all like "should we tell Neil he's now in a relationship or?" but they all decide to leave Neil in his painful obliviousness for the same reason. The fact that it will be Roland to tell him will forever be iconic.

On the translation for "Every inch of you," Andrew said. "That doesn't mean I wouldn't blow you." I forgive the translator every past mistake. That line got me like a freight train in the face.

"Whatever Kevin saw on Neil's face, it was enough to kill his curiosity. Kevin slowly closed his mouth, withdrew his hand, and went back to drinking" // Kevin in this scene

Andrew keeps on being hilarious even unmedicated.

"Cool it," Ricky warned them, with his hands out toward both of them. "We've got enough trouble to deal with right now without your bullshit." // I want a book about him

The whump level of attention Neil gets starting from his Evermore stay and onward is absolutely delicious.

Neil spends the night with Kevin watching Exy matches, then Nicky tries to get Neil to go for ice cream and Neil is about to say no when he sees Andrew and suddenly he's all existential "Exy can't be everything" lmao

Andrew going against Kevin multiple times to favor Neil is my new kink

"I don't want to be that person anymore. I want to go back for you." // Andrew has five (5) people he'd save in a zombie apocalypse. That's an entirely respectable number of people to care for that intensely. Neil chose one and one only.

It's almost impossible to comment anything once we start snowballing toward the end because that would require putting the book down, but I'll make an effort: Andrew's fierceness is heartbreaking. He threatens people left and right and most of the Foxes around him treat him like he's an immortal, vengeful god. Kevin trusts him to protect him from Riko, Neil hilariously trusted him to protect him from Riko and the mafia behind him. Riko himself reacts to him with caution like he's dealing with a rabid dog that might just be faster than a gun drawn in self-defense. Andrew threatens the FBI and Abby, and it's like he genuinely thinks he can win against multiple armed and trained adults. But he's not invincible. He's so far from that it's painful. He can be overpowered, his strength is proportional to his body, he has been brought down again and again. Hes' just a dude. But so many around Andrew treat him like his strength is a bottomless well, for better or worse, and I wonder what his self-confidence would be if he didn’t receive so often positive feedback on his ability to take everything and everyone down with him. I don’t think he’s even aware of it, but I’m glad it’s there nonetheless.

"She taught Coach Exy," Neil reminded him. "And what, he didn't notice that he knocked her up?" Aaron asked. // AARON lmao

Still can't believe Andreil got off on Kevin's drama queen tattoo and didn't even bother trying to hide it

Still can’t believe Andreil had a full on makeout session at Evermore. Somewhere, in a parallel universe, dark Andreil from the perfect court felt a tremor in the force

Reading my bound trilogy gives the pace of the entire work a completely different feeling. This truly is one single story, and not three separate books. Once you feel them being whole in your hands, without boundaries between one and the other, you can truly appreciate the avalanche that this story is. You start slowly with all the puzzle pieces around you and then accelerate until you reach the last 200 pages where you can't even find time to breathe, the entire narrative a single unified crescendo built on the 500 pages that came before.

Neil is an amazing protagonist, but he could have been unsufferable so easily if Nora hadn't done such a good job of keeping him an active character with a mountain of agency. The things that happen to him are obnoxiously incredible, but he never becomes the cliché passive protagonist bound by plot because they have nothing of their own to keep themselves upright. Everything that happens to him he reacts to with equal if not more force; hell, half of what happens he instigates with his own hands. So many books give you an empty protagonist meant to be the stand-in for the audience, just an empty shell so the reader can project onto them and fantasize about a different reality. Neil is complex, absurd, uncomfortable, and doesn't care if you relate to him or not. As a reader you are a fly on the wall and are treated as such. Neil isn’t here to make you feel good about yourself.

Insane rereadability rate. Read one book per day and I didn't even feel it, I already miss it and want to go back to the beginning to ride the roller coaster again. I'm a decade older than when I read this trilogy the first time, but these books are still a dopamine injection straight into my eyeballs.