#Remote call access

[onemonitarsoftware]

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[ejacutastic]

I don't remember if I posted about this already but I had a client at my work who brought in their computer for it running slow (failing hdd) and I found a .txt file on their desktop from a scammer showing they'd paid $499 for a purchase of Windows 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, and 20

[eternityservedcold]

i keep having horrific dreams about getting computer viruses and being sosososo scared but if any of that shit happened in real life it would just be like. Lol time to reinstall windows

[plumadesatada]

All hail ask culture, may she come back from near-death!! How has your day been so far? Gimme one bitching point and one nice thing!

babe!!! yes YES help me with my crusade!

gonna answer this about yesterday (bc today I'm freshly woken up)

bitching point: so. I work in IT. my actual job description is testing and being a help desk for NEW systems being implemented. pay attention to that "new".... because one else at my company does! they think I'm google! "hey so X program closed on me without saving how can I recover what I was working on?" "I need new lines on this excel table can you come over and insert some" (I wish I was joking) "ummmm outlook isn't showing me my calendar" (this one happens once a week. to the same person). I feel like goddamned sisyphus.

one nice thing: I TOOK MOM TO THE THEATER LAST NIGHT FOR HER BIRTHDAY. There was a production of Cyrano and it. was. bloody FANTASTIC. mom fell asleep in the intermission and I bullied her for it ("claims to love theater" etc) after I woke her up and the second bit resumed. afterwards we went out for beer and ummmm what do you call them in English? calamari rings, fried. it was a GOOD night

[des8pudels8kern]

I went from I've been kind of sick since last week but I'm not sicksick to oh, look who's got a fever yesterday and am consequently spending today in bed.

[fazcinatingblog]

I haven't been away on a trip since June so all my packing lists are on my old phone :((( can't wait to get there and find out I only packed four pairs of underwear for a week's trip instead of the usual forty three

[relto]

finally had a talk with the guy with the borked latex, turns out it was the user service person who tried to help him who messed it up, not him.

[ms-demeanor]

So. Okay. I use my personal computer for work. This is not an ideal situation, and it's a holdover from Gary refusing to buy work computers for anyone when we went remote. I do not recommend this. You should not do this. If you are a business, you should not allow your employees to do this. It's a security issue for you and for your employer and is, all around, a bad idea.

My company installs an RMM agent (a program that lets us remotely manage the device and to view the screen in certain circumstances) on all of our client computers; you need the agent to do some server access stuff, so sometimes I have to have the RMM agent on my computer and get joined to our environment. When I'm done doing whatever it is, I uninstall the agent because I don't want my boss to have remote control software on my personal device. If you are using your personal computer at work, you should not allow your employer to maintain remote control software on your personal device.

My computer has a dorky name. I usually name my computers dorky things. This one is called Atredies and the last one was Gandalf and the one before that was Hende Nicholas and the one before that was Robocop. This, notably, does not match our office's pattern of "BN-1508," or even Gary's standard of "Work-Related-Concept" ("Shipping") or "First Name" ("Maddy") for naming our office computers. So sometimes I'll be sitting in the virtual office and someone will look up from doing device approvals and will say "What company has a desktop named Atredies" and I'll be like "us, the sleeper has awakened, let me on" and everyone is like hey Alli you're a huge dork and I'm like yeah.

So here's the thing. You should not be using your personal computer as a work computer. If you are using your personal computer as a work computer, you should not allow your employer to leave control programs installed on the device. If you do have control programs on the device, it's good to make sure that your computer is VERY VERY VERY identifiably *not* a computer owned by your employer. If your employer gave you an old computer that was being decommissioned, you should make sure to do a fresh OS install and you should make sure to rename the machine something that will make it easy to see it's your machine.

This post is brought to you by the lady whose gifted-from-her-job 12 year old laptop named "WP-1644" we just bricked because the client didn't maintain an inventory list and when they couldn't identify the user they decided it was stolen.

[govindhtech]

Tech Breakdown: What Is a SuperNIC? Get the Inside Scoop!

The most recent development in the rapidly evolving digital realm is generative AI. A relatively new phrase, SuperNIC, is one of the revolutionary inventions that makes it feasible.

Describe a SuperNIC

On order to accelerate hyperscale AI workloads on Ethernet-based clouds, a new family of network accelerators called SuperNIC was created. With remote direct memory access (RDMA) over converged Ethernet (RoCE) technology, it offers extremely rapid network connectivity for GPU-to-GPU communication, with throughputs of up to 400Gb/s.

SuperNICs incorporate the following special qualities:

Ensuring that data packets are received and processed in the same sequence as they were originally delivered through high-speed packet reordering. This keeps the data flow’s sequential integrity intact.

In order to regulate and prevent congestion in AI networks, advanced congestion management uses network-aware algorithms and real-time telemetry data.

In AI cloud data centers, programmable computation on the input/output (I/O) channel facilitates network architecture adaptation and extension.

Low-profile, power-efficient architecture that effectively handles AI workloads under power-constrained budgets.

Optimization for full-stack AI, encompassing system software, communication libraries, application frameworks, networking, computing, and storage.

Recently, NVIDIA revealed the first SuperNIC in the world designed specifically for AI computing, built on the BlueField-3 networking architecture. It is a component of the NVIDIA Spectrum-X platform, which allows for smooth integration with the Ethernet switch system Spectrum-4.

The NVIDIA Spectrum-4 switch system and BlueField-3 SuperNIC work together to provide an accelerated computing fabric that is optimized for AI applications. Spectrum-X outperforms conventional Ethernet settings by continuously delivering high levels of network efficiency.

Yael Shenhav, vice president of DPU and NIC products at NVIDIA, stated, “In a world where AI is driving the next wave of technological innovation, the BlueField-3 SuperNIC is a vital cog in the machinery.” “SuperNICs are essential components for enabling the future of AI computing because they guarantee that your AI workloads are executed with efficiency and speed.”

The Changing Environment of Networking and AI

Large language models and generative AI are causing a seismic change in the area of artificial intelligence. These potent technologies have opened up new avenues and made it possible for computers to perform new functions.

GPU-accelerated computing plays a critical role in the development of AI by processing massive amounts of data, training huge AI models, and enabling real-time inference. While this increased computing capacity has created opportunities, Ethernet cloud networks have also been put to the test.

The internet’s foundational technology, traditional Ethernet, was designed to link loosely connected applications and provide wide compatibility. The complex computational requirements of contemporary AI workloads, which include quickly transferring large amounts of data, closely linked parallel processing, and unusual communication patterns all of which call for optimal network connectivity were not intended for it.

Basic network interface cards (NICs) were created with interoperability, universal data transfer, and general-purpose computing in mind. They were never intended to handle the special difficulties brought on by the high processing demands of AI applications.

The necessary characteristics and capabilities for effective data transmission, low latency, and the predictable performance required for AI activities are absent from standard NICs. In contrast, SuperNICs are designed specifically for contemporary AI workloads.

Benefits of SuperNICs in AI Computing Environments

Data processing units (DPUs) are capable of high throughput, low latency network connectivity, and many other sophisticated characteristics. DPUs have become more and more common in the field of cloud computing since its launch in 2020, mostly because of their ability to separate, speed up, and offload computation from data center hardware.

SuperNICs and DPUs both have many characteristics and functions in common, however SuperNICs are specially designed to speed up networks for artificial intelligence.

The performance of distributed AI training and inference communication flows is highly dependent on the availability of network capacity. Known for their elegant designs, SuperNICs scale better than DPUs and may provide an astounding 400Gb/s of network bandwidth per GPU.

When GPUs and SuperNICs are matched 1:1 in a system, AI workload efficiency may be greatly increased, resulting in higher productivity and better business outcomes.

SuperNICs are only intended to speed up networking for cloud computing with artificial intelligence. As a result, it uses less processing power than a DPU, which needs a lot of processing power to offload programs from a host CPU.

Less power usage results from the decreased computation needs, which is especially important in systems with up to eight SuperNICs.

One of the SuperNIC’s other unique selling points is its specialized AI networking capabilities. It provides optimal congestion control, adaptive routing, and out-of-order packet handling when tightly connected with an AI-optimized NVIDIA Spectrum-4 switch. Ethernet AI cloud settings are accelerated by these cutting-edge technologies.

Transforming cloud computing with AI

The NVIDIA BlueField-3 SuperNIC is essential for AI-ready infrastructure because of its many advantages.

Maximum efficiency for AI workloads: The BlueField-3 SuperNIC is perfect for AI workloads since it was designed specifically for network-intensive, massively parallel computing. It guarantees bottleneck-free, efficient operation of AI activities.

Performance that is consistent and predictable: The BlueField-3 SuperNIC makes sure that each job and tenant in multi-tenant data centers, where many jobs are executed concurrently, is isolated, predictable, and unaffected by other network operations.

Secure multi-tenant cloud infrastructure: Data centers that handle sensitive data place a high premium on security. High security levels are maintained by the BlueField-3 SuperNIC, allowing different tenants to cohabit with separate data and processing.

Broad network infrastructure: The BlueField-3 SuperNIC is very versatile and can be easily adjusted to meet a wide range of different network infrastructure requirements.

Wide compatibility with server manufacturers: The BlueField-3 SuperNIC integrates easily with the majority of enterprise-class servers without using an excessive amount of power in data centers.

[reasonsforhope]

"Canadian scientists have developed a blood test and portable device that can determine the onset of sepsis faster and more accurately than existing methods.

Published today [May 27, 2025] in Nature Communications, the test is more than 90 per cent accurate at identifying those at high risk of developing sepsis and represents a major milestone in the way doctors will evaluate and treat sepsis.

“Sepsis accounts for roughly 20 per cent of all global deaths,” said lead author Dr. Claudia dos Santos, a critical care physician and scientist at St. Michael’s Hospital. “Our test could be a powerful game changer, allowing physicians to quickly identify and treat patients before they begin to rapidly deteriorate.”

Sepsis is the body’s extreme reaction to an infection, causing the immune system to start attacking one’s own organs and tissues. It can lead to organ failure and death if not treated quickly. Predicting sepsis is difficult: early symptoms are non-specific, and current tests can take up to 18 hours and require specialized labs. This delay before treatment increases the chance of death by nearly eight per cent per hour.

[Note: The up to 18 hour testing window for sepsis is a huge cause of sepsis-related mortality, because septic shock can kill in as little as 12 hours, long before the tests are even done.]

[Analytical] AI helps predict sepsis

Examining blood samples from more than 3,000 hospital patients with suspected sepsis, researchers from UBC and Sepset, a UBC spin-off biotechnology company, used machine learning to identify a six-gene expression signature “Sepset” that predicted sepsis nine times out of 10, and well before a formal diagnosis. With 248 additional blood samples using RT-PCR, (Reverse Transcription Polymerase Chain Reaction), a common hospital laboratory technique, the test was 94 per cent accurate in detecting early-stage sepsis in patients whose condition was about to worsen.

“This demonstrates the immense value of AI in analyzing extremely complex data to identify the important genes for predicting sepsis and writing an algorithm that predicts sepsis risk with high accuracy,” said co-author Dr. Bob Hancock, UBC professor of microbiology and immunology and CEO of Sepset.

Bringing the test to point of care

To bring the test closer to the bedside, the National Research Council of Canada (NRC) developed a portable device they called PowerBlade that uses a drop of blood and an automated sequence of steps to efficiently detect sepsis. Tested with 30 patients, the device was 92 per cent accurate in identifying patients at high risk of sepsis and 89 per cent accurate in ruling out those not at risk.

“PowerBlade delivered results in under three hours. Such a device can make treatment possible wherever a patient may be, including in the emergency room or remote health care units,” said Dr. Hancock.

“By combining cutting-edge microfluidic research with interdisciplinary collaboration across engineering, biology, and medicine, the Centre for Research and Applications in Fluidic Technologies (CRAFT) enables rapid, portable, and accessible testing solutions,” said co-author Dr. Teodor Veres, of the NRC’s Medical Devices Research Centre and CRAFT co-director. CRAFT, a joint venture between the University of Toronto, Unity Health Toronto and the NRC, accelerates the development of innovative devices that can bring high-quality diagnostics to the point of care.

Dr. Hancock’s team, including UBC research associate and co-author Dr. Evan Haney, has also started commercial development of the Sepset signature. “These tests detect the early warnings of sepsis, allowing physicians to act quickly to treat the patient, rather than waiting until the damage is done,” said Dr. Haney."

-via University of British Columbia, May 27, 2025

[theshadowsquirrel]

Discovered today that the registers at work have access to ms paint of all things

Rest of the shift was us just coloring

[languagexs]

Access Instant Telephonic Interpreting Services On-Demand

As US diversity rises, demand for instant access to professional phone interpreters in 260+ languages also climbs. 24/7 on-demand services now enable multilingual communication anytime.

As linguistic diversity rises across the United States, the demand for on-demand telephonic interpreting services continues growing. Professional phone interpreters who can quickly bridge communication gaps in hundreds of languages are vital for today’s interconnected world. In this article, we’ll explore what telephone interpreting involves, key benefits over on-site services, and common usage…

[tact-and-impulse]

this truly is Messy Monday at work

[wosospacegirl]

Legally binding - Alexia putellas x platonic! r

Summary: Alexia Putellas didn’t plan to become anyone’s legal guardian. But a very determined 12-year-old with a forged Barça contract has other ideas — and she’s already moved in.

Word count: 4k

a/n: if this sounds like a Disney Channel movie, it’s intentional

Part 2

Masterlist

..

Y/n was a smart kid—sharp, resourceful, and quick on her feet. But the social workers at the orphanage, a quiet place run by nuns, always said she was using her intelligence the wrong way. 

They told her she should channel her persistence and curiosity into something more practical. Something like STEM or the arts.

And honestly, Y/n knew they had a pointt. She could do it. She could be anyone she wanted to be—if she just focused on the right path. 

But there was one thing she knew, deep down, more than anything else: she wanted to be a footballer.

It wasn’t a decision. It was just the way her heart beat.

Her love for football begn the first time a social worker brought a ball into the orphanage. It was a modest thing, scuffed and old, but to Y/n, it was the most precious thing in the world. 

She could still remember how the other kids’ faces lit up when they saw it. They didn’t need fancy equipment or a field, just a ball, and sometimes not even that..

They played with whatever they could find, paper balls, socks rolled into bundles, even erasers. 

Anything small enough to be kicked into became a football. It wasn’t about rules or winning. It was about the feeling of freedom.

For Y/n, that ball was more than just a game. It was a doorway to everything she wanted to be.

Y/n couldn’t contain her excitement when one of the nuns called all the children together to announce something that made her heart race.

FC Barcelon was forming a partnership with their orphanage.

A few of the kids, just a select, would get to train at La Masia once a week.

Y/n’s breath caught in her throat. Was it some charity project, a way for the club to get a tax break? Probably.

But when she saw her name on the list, all of that faded into the background.

She didn’t know much about Barça, just that it came from her hometown, from the city she rarely got to see.

The orphanage didn’t have a TV, no access to phones, and the nuns were their only teachers. So, there was no real school either.

Her world was limited to the small walls of the orphanage, and the little knowledge she could gather from the newspapers the nuns allowed her to read

It was her only window to the outside world, her only connection to a life she could only dream of.

Yeah, Y/n was pretty cut off from everything outside. But in that moment, none of that mattered. What mattered was this chance,,a chance to be part of something bigger. 

A chance to step out of the small world that had always confined her.

On her first day at La Masia, Y/n didn’t expect to impress anyone. But when she stepped onto the pitch, she gave it everything she had. 

Her skills spoke for themselves, and by the end of the session, she’d earned a few impressed looks from the staff. 

She wasn’t the fastest or the most polished player, but she held her own, especially considering she didn’t even own a pair of proper football boots. 

She was playing in sneakers that were two sizes too big, but she didn’t care. She was there, and that was enough.

But it wasn’t all easy. 

Some of the girls on the team looked at her like she didn’t belong. 

Technically, they were right. She didn’t. Not with her background. She wasn’t one of them. She wasn’t wealthy, well-connected, or even remotely like the girls who had grown up with football academies and proper training.

Y/n felt the weight of their stares, but she pushed it aside. She wasn’t there to fit in or prove anything to them. 

She was there for herself. She was here for the dream, and that was all that mattered..

Despite the looks, a couple of girls made it easier for her, Jana and Vicky, both around fourteen. 

They were kind and quick to see that she wasn’t like the others. Within minutes, they pulled her into their little group, showing her how things worked and making her feel like she wasn’t invisible.

The kindness didn’t stop there. 

During lunch, when Y/n pulled out her bottle of water and realised she hadn’t packed anything to eat, Jana and Vicky didn’t hesitate.

They shared their sandwiches without a second thought, smiling at her like she wasn’t some outsider but a new friend.

In that moment, Y/n felt something shift inside her. Maybe she didn’t have football boots. Maybe she wasn’t from the right background. But at least for now, she had a place here.

The second time Y/n showed up at La Masia, she couldn’t help but frown when she saw most of the girls huddled together on the left side of the pitch, eyes fixed on something, or someone, at far left.

She couldn’t make out what was going on, but the low murmur of excitement buzzed through the air.

Curious, Y/n walked over, trying to get a better view, but a few elbows shoved her back. She shifted behind the group and stood on tiptoe, trying to peer past the heads of the others.

“Hey, who’s that?” she asked, her voice sharp enough to cut through the chatter.

Vicky and Jana exchanged a glance, then looked back at her like she’d just asked the most ridiculous question in the world.

“Who is that?! Are you kidding me?” Jana said, eyes wide with disbelief.

Y/n raised an eyebrow.

“That’s Alexia Putellas. La Reina,” Jana added, almost reverently.

“Oh,” Y/n said, her brow furrowing. “That’s the queen? What’s she doing here?”

Vicky rolled her eyes playfully. “She’s not really the queen,” she said, though her tone held an edge of affection. “We call her La Reina because she’s Barça royalty. She’s the best of all time. The GOAT, you know.”

Y/n blinked, processing the words. “Goat?” she repeated, confused. “Cabra? What do you mean?”

Jana’s patience clearly wore thin. “Not cabra, Y/n! It stands for ‘Greatest of all time,’ she explained, grabbing both of their hands and pulling them through the crowd. “Come with me, I know where we can actually see her up close.”

Y/n couldn’t help but be intrigued. This Alexia Putellas was more than just a football player—she was something else entirely. And for reasons Y/n didn’t fully understand yet, that something seemed to pull at her.

They ducked under the bleachers, the ground gritty beneath their feet. 

Something warm and sticky brushed against Y/n’s cheek, but she didn’t even flinch. She didn’t care about the dirt or the discomfort, because now she could see Alexia. And, more importantly, she could hear her too.

Alexia was standing a little ways away, her blonde hair shining in the sun. 

She had this calm, open expression, a kind of warmth about her that made Y/n’s chest tighten in a way she couldn’t quite explain. 

She wasn’t sure what she had expected, but Alexia was nothing like she had imagined. She seemed... accessible. Human, even.

Not like the untouchable royalty that Vicky and Jana made her out to be.

“She’s like... amazing,” Jana whispered, her voice full of awe. “I wanna play with her someday.”

“She’s the best,” Vicky added, nodding in agreement. Her tone was reverent, almost as if she was talking about someone from a distant dream.

Y/n watched Alexia as she spoke with the journalist.

There was something undeniable about the way she held herself. 

Y/n wasn’t sure if she wanted to be like her, or if she wanted Alexia to help her become someone who could stand at that level.

“I came here because of the partnership La Masia formed with the children from Santa Clara Orphanage,” Alexia said, adjusting her jacket as she talked with the interviewer. 

“It’s important to me to meet them, to show them that football isn’t just a game.”

The interviewer nodded, intrigued. 

“It must be so special to be able to offer that to kids who may not have many opportunities to begin with. So, do you have any specific hopes for them? Any wishes for their futures?”

Alexia smiled softly, her gaze thoughtful as she glanced out over the training field. 

“Well, I think what I wish most for them is that they find someone who will guide them, a loving and responsible adult, someone who’s not just looking to be a saviour, but to give them the support they need to succeed.”

She paused for a moment before continuing, her voice more deliberate. 

“And of course, I hope they all follow what’s in their hearts. It doesn’t matter if that’s football, or music, or whatever. They need to feel supported, and they need to know that their dreams are valid, no matter what those dreams are.”

The interviewer smiled, clearly moved. 

“That’s beautiful , Alexia...so, you’re saying you see your role more as a guide, rigrh? Rather than someone who swoops in to fix everything for them?”

Alexia chuckled lightly, shaking her head. 

“Exactly. I’m not here to fix anyone. Barcelona is here creating opportunities, giving them the tools they need, and letting them choose their own path. They’re the ones who will shape their futures.”

Loving and responsible adult.

That sentence echoed in Y/n’s brain.

Alexia hoped the kids from her orphanage would find a loving and responsible adult.

Well, Y/n was from Santa Clara. And Alexia looked like a loving and responsible adult…

It all fit together perfectly.

Y/n’s mind raced as she replayed Alexia’s words over and over again. “Loving and responsible adult…”

What did that even mean? Y/n wasn’t sure, but she knew she didn’t need a parent. 

She had never craved that. 

She didn’t need someone to love her, to fix her, or to give a version of a family. What she needed, what she wanted, was an opportunity. 

And Alexia? She was the opportunity. She was the bridge between Y/n and the future she wanted.

Becoming a footballer wasn’t about being loved. It was about getting the right connections, the right guidance, the right support. Y/n didn’t care for a hug or a bedtime story. 

She didn’t need to be told “I love you” every night. No,, what she needed was someone who could get her into the right circles, someone who knew how to navigate the world she wanted to break into.

And Alexia? She was the perfect fit. 

She was a champion, the best of the best, according to the girls. 

If Y/n could convince Alexia to be her guardian, then maybe—just maybe—her dream could become real. 

She could train harder, learn more, and eventually, one day, be just like Alexia. And that, she thought, would be enough.

It was simple: Y/n needed Alexia to help her make her dream come true. That’s all. She wasn’t asking for a family. She just needed someone to show her the way.

..

The next morning, Y/n went straight to the orphanage library and got her hands on any book that mentioned Spain’s adoption laws.

And there it was.

In the third paragraph about adoption and guardianship, it said any child twelve or older could be placed under guardianship by an adult willing to sign the paperwork. 

It wouldn’t be full adoption, no name change, but the child could live with the adult, go to school, and get medical care under their name.

Kind of like a shortcut to being adopted. And since older kids were rarely chosen, this process was easier.

Y/n made her decision.

She was going to be adopted by Alexia Putellas. Whether Alexia liked it or not.

..

A few weeks later, the La Masia kids were rewarded with a tour of FC Barcelona’s official building.

That was the moment Y/n had been waiting for.

She memorised the entire guardianship clause and wrote it on her hand. Then, during the tour, she slipped away when one of the monitors wasn’t looking and headed for the second floor.

She found a room labelled Management and Contracts. It looked serious enough.

She locked the door behind her, walked over to a computer, and typed in the password.

ViscaElBarça. Easy.

She searched until she found Alexia Putellas’ contract. Jana had told her the star player was about to sign a new five-year deal.

Y/n opened the file, converted the PDF to a Word doc, scrolled to page thirteen, and inserted a paragraph in Arial size 3, a forged clause labelled 12(b) stating that:

‘Ms. Alexia Putellas Segura, herein referred to as 'the Guardian,' consents to and accepts full legal guardianship of minor Y/n [Full Legal Name], age twelve, a wardd of the Santa Clara Orphanage, n the contractual agreement between Futbol Club Barcelona and the Santa Clara Children’s Welfare Foundation. This guardianship shall be recognised in accordance with applicable civil codes and is binding upon execution.]

Then she turned the document back into a PDF and quietly saved it.

Her plan was perfect.

She was going to be adopted by the greatest footballer the world had ever seen, according to Jana, nd that would make her a great footballer, too.

..

A week later, Y/n was the first at the front door, waiting for the paper deliveryman. One of the nuns gave her a strange look,no one ever beat the nuns to morning prayers, let alone the newspaper, but Y/n didn’t care. 

She needed to know if Alexia had signed the guardianship contract

And there it was.

Right on the front page.

“Alexia Putellas signs new deal with Barcelona Femení.”

“Yes!” Y/n whispered to herself, pumping a fist. “I’m officially out of here.”

She ran back to her room, the one she shared with six other girls, all still fast asleep, grabbed her tiny backpack, and packed up the few belongings she had. 

Three shirts, one pair of sneakers, a toothbrush, and three old photos from her childhood. That was it. That was her life in a bag.

She made her way to the main office and knocked on Sister Maria’s door, but didn’t bother waiting for permission to enter.

Good morning, Sister Maria,” Y/n said, standing up straight, her voice unusually serious for a twelve-year-old.

The nun didn’t even look up from her desk. “What is it now, Y/n? No, you still can’t keep that stray cat—how many times do I have to tell you—”

“It’s not about the cat,” Y/n interrupted. “I’m here to say my sincere goodbyes.”

Sister Maria blinked and finally looked up.

“Goodbyes? Are you eighteen already? My goodness, how time flies.”

“No, Sister,” Y/n said. “I’ve been adopted.”

Silence.

“Adopted?” Sister Maria echoed. “Someone… wanted you?”

“I know,” Y/n said, unfazed. “Hard to believe. But yes. You can check the system. It’s official.”

If everything had gone according to plan—and Y/n was confident it had—the guardianship contract Alexia signed had already been processed by the Ministry of Sport and forwarded to the Ministry of Family Affairs. 

Which meant it would be reflected in Y/n’s file.

Sister Maria sat down at her computer, muttering prayers under her breath. A few tense minutes passed before she gasped.

“Oh dear Lord. You were adopted. A legal guardianship contract, signed and approved.”

“Exactly,” Y/n said. “So if you’ll excuse me, I have a new home to get to.”

She turned toward the door, but Sister Maria reached out and gently stopped her.

“Here,” she said, holding out a few crumpled euro notes. “For the metro.”

Y/n blinked at the money. “The metro?”

“Yes. How else are you getting to your new guardian’s house? They aren’t picking you up, right?”

Y/n paused.

Right. She hadn’t exactly figured that part out yet. 

Jana once mentioned that some of the players lived in an apartment complex near the training grounds… maybe she’d start there.

“Thank you, Sister,” Y/n said, taking the money.

“Be good,” Sister Maria said gruffly. “We don’t want you back.”

“Don’t worry,” Y/n replied with a grin. “I’m not coming back.”

..

Alexia had played in front of ninety thousand people.

She had captained both club and country, stood on podiums with medals heavy around her neck, even delivered a speech in Parliament once, with a microphone that cut out every third word and a sea of ministers blinking up at her.

But nothing—absolutely nothing—had prepared her for walking into her apartment at seven o’clock on a Wednesday night and finding a twelve-year-old girl sitting on her sofa.

Just. Sitting there.

Like she lived there.

Alexia froze mid-step, one boot still halfway on, the keys slipping loose from her fingers and clattering to the floor.

“…Por dios? [Oh God]” she said, her voice suddenly higher than she remembered it being. “Quién eres tú? [Who are you?]”

The girl turned around, perfectly calm, as if the famous footballer bursting into the room hadn’t startled her in the slightest. 

“Oh. Hi,” the girl said casually, her legs tucked underneath her,

Alexia blinked. “Who are you?”

The girl tilted her head, eyebrows raised like Alexia was the confusing part of this entire situation. “You’re Alexia Putellas, right?”

“…Yes?

“Perfect,” the girl said, brightening. “Then everything’s fine. I’m at the right house.”

She patted the cushion beside her invitingly.

“Do you want to sit?”

Alexia recoiled like it was cursed. “No, I do not want to sit...what...how did you get in here?”

She looked around wildly, as if the answer might be hiding behind the kitchen island or crouched behind the bookshelf. 

Maybe someone would burst in, yelling sorpresa! [surprise!] and explain this whole insane setup. Maybe she had fallen asleep in the car and was dreaming this.

“The window was unlocked,” the girl said.

“It wasn’t.”

“Well,” she replied, stretching her arms over the back of the sofa, “then I’m very resourceful.”

Alexia’s mouth opened. Closed. Opened again.

“It’s the third floor,” she hissed, stumbling backwards until her hip hit the counter. She stared at the kid. “Did you scale the building?”

The girl only smiled.

“Okay. Noo. No, absolutely not. What is happening right now?”

The girl, still nameless, reached into her backpack and pulled out a thick folder. 

It wasn’t a school folder. 

It was a serious folder. One with a fake FC Barcelona letter and, horrifyingly, red stamp across the front that read:

LEGAL ADDENDUM.

She handed it over like it explained everything.

Alexia took it with both hands, mostly because her brain had stopped functioning somewhere around the phrase “unlocked window.” 

Inside was a single newspaper clipping—cut out so unevenly it looked like a toddler had done it—with a photo of Alexia signing her contract.

“There was a clause,” the girl said matter-of-factly. “In your new contract.”

Alexia stared at her, her mouth dry. “A clause.”

“Yep. Clause twelve, subsection B. Guardianship exception.”

Alexia blinked. “Guardianship. Exception.”

“Uhum.”

“For whom?”

“For me.”

The girl pulled out more papers, each one worse than the last. 

One had what appeared to be the signature of the ‘King of Spain’—in blue marker. Another was a crayon drawing of a house, two stick figures holding hands, labelled “Me and Alexia

Alexia's eyes widened in pure horror.

“Where is your mother?” she asked slowly.

The girl beamed. “You’re my mom now!”

Alexia dropped the folder like it had burned her.

“I’m what?”

Alexia stared, mouth open, the girl beamed like this was the best news ever.

Nope. Not happening. Absolutely not.

“Kidding,” the girl said, flashing a grin. “Kind of. You said in that interview last month that you hoped all the orphan kids would find a loving, responsible adult.”

Alexia’s jaw dropped. “And what the hell does that have to do with… with this?”

“You said you adored us.” The girl’s voice got quiet—barely a whisper. “I figured… I adored you too. So.”

Something in Alexia’s chest twitched.

The girl looked up at her with the sort of fierce, casual defiance only kids had. 

“I’m an orphan. If you didn’t get that already. So you don’t have to worry about like, my real parents showing up or anything.”

Alexia pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. “I’m going to get arrested.”

“No, you’re not,” the girl said cheerfully, already lounging deeper into the cushions. “You’re Alexia Putellas. Who’s gonna arrest you?”

Alexia stared at her—this strange, sharp-edged, audacious child who had just moved in like it was the most obvious thing in the world—and let out a weak, exhausted noise from the back of her throat.

“This,” she muttered, “this is exactly why I don’t do interviews.

Her brain was racing with thoughts of calling lawyers, agents, and possibly the police, but she couldn’t quite make herself move. 

The absurdity of the situation was almost paralysing.

The girl, this little stranger, was sitting on her sofa, hands folded in her lap, staring at the television like it was an alien object. 

Her brows were furrowed in concentration.

Alexia watched her for a moment, then shook her head. 

This was unreal.

The silence between them stretched until the girl looked up, her expression expectant.

“So, uh,” she began, her voice a little tentative, “what’s for dinner?”

The question hit Alexia hard.

Dinner. Right. She hadn’t even thought about food yet, too distracted by the miniature crisis unfolding in her living room.

She opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by the sudden growl of her own stomach.

Alexia closed her eyes in frustration.

“Well, kid, I—” She stopped herself before the words could spill out. She wasn’t exactly prepared for this situation, wasn’t prepared for any of it. 

But as she stood there, her mind raced. She’d have to figure out how this was even possible. 

But right now?

Right now, the girl needed food.

With a resigned sigh, Alexia turned towards the kitchen, opening the fridge with one hand, still clutching the paperwork the girl had handed her in the other.

“Alright, let’s see what we’ve got,” she muttered under her breath. “This is insane.”

And yet... she still opened the fridge. Still started pulling ingredients. Like feeding this girl—this strange, stubborn kid–somehow made sense.

She’s probably hungry, Alexia thought. 

She broke into my apartment, but she’s just a child. A very determined, mildly terrifying child.

She sighed. God help me.

She glanced over her shoulder to find the girl still sitting there, waiting patiently.

“Have you ever had dinner like...this?” Alexia asked, unsure how to phrase it without sounding too out of place.

The girl looked up at her, an odd sort of quiet in her eyes. “Not like this. Not... regular–we just had soup.”

Alexia felt something tighten in her chest, but she didn’t have time to dwell on it.

“Well, kid,” Alexia said, her voice softer than she intended. “You’re about to have something regular.”

She grabbed whatever was in reach—leftover pasta, a couple of eggs, and some questionable vegetables—and set to work. 

It wasn’t much, but it was something. Something stable. Something she could handle right now.

The girl didn’t talk again, just watched Alexia prepare the food like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Maybe this wasn’t a disaster… at least not yet. But Alexia knew she was barely holding it together. Jjust barely.

And, for now, feeding this girl was the only thing she could focus on.

..

a/n: honestly, this was just a random idea that wouldn’t leave me alone, so I had to write it down. I’m not sure if there’ll be more, but I had a blast writing it and just wanted to share! :D

Part 2

[relto]

this morning i helped someone from a group im admin of but havent had much contact with yet with a basic account issue and somehow immediately made it to her "important contacts if i need help" list. certainly a new experience