#SORRY AGAIN FOR RAMBLE i will stop it here

[willows-shots]

seven minutes in heaven

friend!reneé rapp x reader

summary that's pretty much it.

cw smut, making out, dry humping, semi exhibitionism, implied friends to lovers

wc ~500

requested by @l1lass

11:37pm

you're pushed into the closet with reneé. the only person you prayed the bottle wouldn't land on.

you've been eyeing her all night, watching her be so effortlessly attractive.

in short, she was ruining you- her outfit, her laugh, the confidence. it was ridiculous.

the doors close, "7 minutes starting!" you hear, followed by a trail of giggles from the rest of your friends.

you can barely see anything, only the ugly brown colour of the wood and that gorgeous girl in front of you.

11:38pm

you're sitting- knees to your chest, hoping the time would run out faster.

reneé was on the other end, looking down at you curiously.

"baby, why are you all the way down there, hm?" she taunts. you go a little dizzy at the petname.

"i- it's nice down here..." you mumble.

she sighs, "okay."

11:39pm

"so," she breaks the silence. "what d'you wanna do?"

"i can't even see anything- it's so tight in here." you ramble, dodging her question. you're trying to sound normal, confident.

"well... we could make out?" she says, so casually.

you crumble. you hope she doesn't see how your jaw drops.

"...what?" you ask.

"what? that's the game." you hear a hint of disappointment in her question, but then again- maybe your brain just made it up.

the awkward silence continues once more.

11:40pm

"can we makeout?" her voice comes from the dark, suddenly.

"reneé!" you gasp in shock.

"come onnnn. i saw how you've been looking at me all night, baby." she teases. "don't be shy all of a sudden." she rolls her eyes.

11:41pm

she has you pinned to the wall.

"is this okay?" she asks, eyes flickering to your lips.

"i- yes." you admit. "please."

11:42pm

her mouth is attached to yours, giving you no space to breathe. her hands are strong at your jaw, holding you at her desired angle.

you whimper at her forwardness.

you kiss her back with just as much passion, melting into her.

the shock wears off and you realise your hands are levitating by her sides, you have no idea what to do with them. she giggles into your mouth, grabbing your arms without disconnecting your lips, and placing them directly onto her ass. you gasp.

"you can touch, silly."

her knee slots between your thighs, her hips rocking into you immediately.

you're moaning into each others mouths, completely breathless.

"you're so cute," she sighs. "it's actually annoying."

11:43pm

"time's up!" a voice comes from outside.

"go away!" reneé yells, attention diverting back to you immediately.

12:01am

you've both come twice- she's now carrying you back to your group of friends.

you're exhausted, clinging to her helplessly.

everyone becomes silent as she rejoins the circle on the floor with you still in her lap, exchanging knowing glances.

"stop smirking." reneé grumbles, petting your hair so softly- definitely not helping her case.

"okay, but you two could've tried to make that less obvious."

a/n okay that was fun 😛 + sorry it took so long i completely forgot about this fic after writing the title. @ttheeblueee @bitchesbrokenpromises request me!

[enhypen-btswriter]

Late Night Calls - Part 4: Ni-ki _____________________________________________The call connected after just one ring.

“Yo,” Ni-ki’s voice came through, a little raspy, a little too casual for how fast he picked up. “Took you long enough.”

You grinned. “I called you ten seconds after your text.”

He clicked his tongue. “Could’ve been faster.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, your majesty.”

A beat of silence. Then he laughed — low and tired, but real. “Shut up.”

You could hear the faint rustle of sheets, his hoodie sleeve brushing the mic, the quiet click of his lamp being turned off.

“You in bed already?”

“Mm-hmm. Wasn’t gonna sleep yet, though,” he said quickly. “Was kinda just… waiting.”

Your heart softened. “Waiting for me?”

“…No,” he mumbled — a bold-faced lie.

You let it slide.

Instead: “What were you thinking about?”

Ni-ki paused. “Dunno. Random stuff. What we’d be doing if you were here. What snack I’d make you eat. If I’d let you hold me or not.”

You chuckled. “You’d give in after thirty seconds.”

“No way. I’d be strong.”

“You’d cave the second I said your name in that soft voice.”

His breath caught — just a little.

You smiled to yourself. “Like this: Riki… baby, come here.”

“Stop it,” he said, flustered.

“You’d fold.”

“Okay, maybe I would,” he muttered. “Whatever.”

You listened to the way he shifted under the blanket again. His voice got quieter, almost as if he was pressing the phone closer to his cheek.

Then, softly: “It’s stupid how much I miss you sometimes.”

“It’s not stupid.”

“I mean—” he sighed. “I don’t even know why. I saw you, like, what? Two days ago?”

You leaned your head back against your pillow. “Because love doesn’t work on a schedule. It just… shows up when it wants. And stays.”

Ni-ki was quiet. Not in resistance — just in thought. Processing.

“…I like when you say stuff like that,” he murmured eventually.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Makes me feel like I don’t have to hide how I feel.”

“You never do. Especially not with me.”

Another soft pause.

Then, barely above a whisper: “I love you.”

Your heart clenched — not because he rarely said it, but because of how raw it sounded. Like it snuck out of him before he could think twice.

You answered without missing a beat. “I love you more, Riki. So much more. I’d tell you every hour if I could.”

“…You kinda do.”

“And I’ll keep doing it,” you said with a grin. “Because I want you to know. Always.”

His breathing slowed again. You could tell he was getting sleepier — finally safe enough in your voice to let his guard down.

Then: “Can you just talk? Until I fall asleep?”

Your chest swelled.

“Of course, baby. What do you want me to talk about?”

“Anything. Just… stay.”

So you did.

You rambled about nothing — what you ate, what you listened to earlier, the funny thing your neighbor did — and somewhere in the middle of your sentence, Ni-ki stopped replying.

But he didn’t hang up.

You listened to his soft, even breaths, and smiled to yourself.

“I’ll be here when you wake up,” you whispered into the phone. “Sweet dreams, love.”

_____________________________________________

There aren’t many dom!male stories so ima just make em all 😒

TY

[demigod-shenanigans]

-Ooooh, I may have to look into the differences between guitar and bass guitar then!! It’s probably not something I’m gonna be able to start anytime soon but I do yearningly think about it every now and again. Also you learning to play toh tracks on the piano is so cool? I hope you’re having the best time with it :D

-DID and Schizophrenia get mixed up a lot in general and I’m not really sure why?? And yeah. Considering it’s been a decade since these books came out and mental health rep (especially DID/Schizophrenia) being mishandled is still a problem, I guess I’m not too surprised, but it still really sucks. Please don’t teach kids that these are terms to just throw around casually for random fantasy shenanigans rather than real disorders people struggle with and that need and deserve more understanding in society (there’s also a problem here with them only ever being applied to the gods and not any of the demigod characters in terms of rep, but like you said, that’s because they weren’t meant to be rep, they’re just being used like funny little descriptive terms which should not have happened). I’m not sure why this wasn’t at least changed in the newer versions of the ebooks but it frustrates me to no end.

-Yeah, Rick probably just didn’t think about the logistics of these things but what am I if not constantly trying to fix canon plot holes LMAO. And yeah, this fic is very much focused on healing for Leo (as much as he will struggle to get there, because healing isn’t something that happens fast or easily). Also, the healing/music thing is gonna make me add a thing to my next gen cast. Specifically, Sofía’s best friend/love interest is a son of Apollo (his name is Blaze), and he was always going to be able to heal but I’m thinking now that I specifically want him to heal via singing. He’s a very talented archer and the healing he does is good but the thing is he’s not a very good singer so he gets pretty self-conscious about it. Sofía thinks it’s very endearing, though.

-Friendships being just as important as romantic relationships and m/f friendships being normalized is so so important to me. Also, I feel your pain. I had one specific male friend that people were convinced I was dating after I hugged him on a field trip in sixth grade and it got so annoying we stopped talking for a while. We became friends again eventually and somehow that rumor never entirely died down. Let people be friends regardless of gender?? It’s so stupid that people are so weird about this and I’m sorry it’s made some of your friendships so much more confusing than they needed to be.

-Please know I loved loved loved reading your Buffy related rambles and they’ve made me even more excited to start the show. From the way you’re describing Oz there’s a very good chance he’s gonna be my favorite because I, too, have a pattern when it comes to favorite characters. Also the surrounding fandom and extra info rambles are super appreciated, they’re very good to know and not stuff I’d necessarily have known immediately if I’d just gone into it blind (I know some stuff about the show but had no idea about anything regarding the creator, did not know there was a spin-off or about the fandom largely regarding the last two seasons as non-canon so that’s very helpful, thank you!!)

I’ll let you know once I start watching and if you want to please know you’re absolutely allowed to yap to me about it for as long and as intensely as you want. Stuff like that delights me. I love listening to people ramble about the stuff they love. I also have absolutely no doubt I’m gonna adore the show because judging by pretty much every interest you’ve ever talked about on here we have very similar tastes in shows.

I’m glad the show changed your life for the better, too, but I’m sorry the surrounding experience with unmasking and how that affected potential and existing friendships was so difficult :((

Not to wildly overshare on my own “I don’t know what’s wrong with my brain”-experience but I always get super fixated on one specific interest for long stretches of time and then don’t talk to anyone irl about it because I’m worried about being too much but because I’ve only got this One Thing I care about intensely at a time it’s also difficult to find other stuff to talk to people about? (One of the people I go to uni with told me he’d watched owl house because he saw me wear a Luz pin once and assumed I enjoyed it and I had a very brief conversation with him about it like I was a person who was able to enjoy things a normal amount and hadn’t written like 200k words of fanfic for it). It’s just. Argh. I have a fandom blog online so I can have zero personality in my day to day life essentially and I hate that I’m like this but I’m also not really sure how to stop. I don’t really know where I’m going with this. Just. I get that it’s difficult sometimes.

-I’ve seen Kaos actually!! I actually considered mentioning it in my reply so it’s a very funny coincidence that I ultimately didn’t and then you brought it up. It’s a shame it didn’t get a season two because some of what they did with the myth subversion was soooo interesting. And Orpheus and Eurydice was for sure one of the most interesting ones. I still think about Eurydice begging Orpheus to look at her when they were fighting. (I also think a lot about Ariadne and her brother. I swear every iteration I read/see about the story of the labyrinth makes me feel worse for the Minotaur, but that is slightly off-topic)

I’m glad!! Idk what it is but our conversations always make me ramble so much haha

The choiceless hope in grief (chapter five)

Leo spent most of the morning glued to his workbench, trying and failing to figure out what wasn’t working about the stupid device he was working on. It would have been seriously helpful if he’d at least known what he was building, but nope. It felt even dumber because something about it was familiar. The feeling was like an itch at the back of Leo’s brain that he couldn’t reach or make sense of. It was like having a word at the tip of his tongue that didn’t come to him no matter how hard he tried to think of it. As tempted as he was, he still didn’t throw the mess of pipes and scales and wires out the window, but he did maybe throw it at one of the walls. He startled himself with how loud it was. There was a knock on his door a few seconds later, and he cringed. “Sorry! Technical difficulties! I’ll try to throw stuff at the wall more quietly next time!” he announced, sighing loudly. The knocks continued. “I’m fine, I swear! No need for anyone to come in.” The voice that responded wasn’t Jo or Emmie like he’d expected. “I did not fly here all the way from Oklahoma to let your door stop me.”

Rating: Teen and Up

Chapter Word Count: 4.4k

Fun fact! The title for this chapter is vaguely based on Magnus Chase chapter titles, specifically “Mallory gets nuts/Mallory also gets fruit”. There’s no specific reason for this, I just thought it was funny.

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———

Chapter 5: Piper gives Leo snacks. Also a dagger for some reason

Because Leo was mature, reasonable and great at dealing with conflict, he spent most of the following week moping in his room. 

He and Calypso avoided each other like the plague. The Waystation got the hint and actually made that decently easy for them—it turned out that if you didn’t want to meet in a magic shifting building, your paths simply always led away from one another.

That was pretty handy, he had to admit.

Leo felt particularly shitty on Saturday. He’d dreamed about Jason again. Like that wasn’t bad enough, the humans that rented out the space below the Waystation for events had chosen this weekend to celebrate a wedding down there. Cheerful songs about everlasting love had begun blasting through the floor at eight in the morning—seriously, which monster planned their wedding ceremony for eight am?—and Leo had not been granted even a minute of peace since.

His plan was to not leave the room all day, exclusively eat snacks out of his tool belt, and hopefully hammer loud enough on one of his projects that it drowned out the obnoxious love fest downstairs.

At first this worked okay. He spent most of the morning glued to his workbench, trying and failing to figure out what wasn’t working about the stupid device he was working on.

It would have been seriously helpful if he’d at least known what he was building, but nope. It felt even dumber because something about it was familiar. The feeling was like an itch at the back of Leo’s brain that he couldn’t reach or make sense of.

It was like having a word at the tip of his tongue that didn’t come to him no matter how hard he tried to think of it.

As tempted as he was, he still didn’t throw the mess of pipes and scales and wires out the window, but he did maybe throw it at one of the walls.

He startled himself with how loud it was.

There was a knock on his door a few seconds later, and he cringed.

“Sorry! Technical difficulties! I’ll try to throw stuff at the wall more quietly next time!” he announced, sighing loudly. The knocks continued. “I’m fine, I swear! No need for anyone to come in.”

The voice that responded wasn’t Jo or Emmie like he’d expected.

“I did not fly here all the way from Oklahoma to let your door stop me.”

Leo’s head snapped up. “Piper?”

“Breakup food delivery service!” she announced, and that did finally get him to detach himself from his workbench.

The door to his room opened. And there Piper was, holding a container of chocolate ice cream of truly ridiculous size and two bags of Fonzies.

Leo had to hold himself back from hugging her on the spot. He couldn’t risk the snacks.

“I love you.”

Leo was still terrified of all the ways he might hurt Piper, but he was also terribly selfish and had had a shitty week and he’d missed her like crazy. 

Besides, he hadn’t had another dream about parking garages or fire tornados in weeks. Maybe it really had just been a nightmare for once. He so, so desperately wanted to believe that.

He wanted to sink into Piper and never let her go again.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m the greatest best friend you could ever wish for.” Piper grinned and flopped down on his bed. 

“I was talking to the Fonzies, actually,” Leo declared. He sat down next to her, took one of the bags and kissed it for dramatic effect. Piper snorted.

“I know what I heard. No take-backs.”

“Fine. Maybe I also love you a little bit. Not as much as the Fonzies, though. Where did you even get these?” 

“State secret,” Piper said with a grin.

Leo did hug her, then, and for a while, they stayed like this, and the world felt a little more okay. 

“How do you even know Calypso and I broke up? Did your best friend spidey senses go off or something?”

They had sent two Iris messages since it had happened, but Leo definitely hadn’t mentioned it.

“Calypso called me, actually.”

Leo blinked, baffled. “I- really? Why?”

“She said she doesn’t want to be around you right now, but she’s worried. She figured I might be able to help.”

“Oh. That’s… really nice of her.” Leo didn’t feel like he deserved that, after all the awful things he’d said to her.

“Hence, emergency trip to visit my best friend. Speaking of Calypso: how mad are we at her? Because I don’t care that she was nice about this one thing. I will deck her for you if the situation warrants it.”

That almost got a laugh out of Leo. “No one is decking Calypso. We just didn’t work. I can forgive a lot of stuff, but I draw the line at her thinking I’m not funny.”

If Calypso hadn’t gone into why they’d broken things off, Leo wouldn’t either. 

The longer he thought about it, the worse he felt about the way their entire relationship had gone down.

Even more awful than that was the fact that he was starting to realize that maybe he hadn’t even loved Calypso—at least not in the way he’d convinced himself he did. 

He’d loved the idea of her. Because somehow, loving an immortal girl on an island no one had ever been able to return to was more convenient than addressing the way being around Jason made him feel. 

He wasn’t entirely sure he felt ready to have that conversation with Piper, though.

“Some of your jokes are pretty terrible, to be fair.” Piper nudged him gently. 

Leo nudged her back. “Oh, shut up. You think I’m hilarious.”

He knew Piper was teasing him. It wasn’t like when Calypso interrupted his jokes because they didn’t fit the scene he was trying to cope with. It didn’t make him feel childish or stupid or awful.

It just felt like home.

“You wish.” Piper smiled at him. “We don’t have to talk about your breakup if you don’t want to. We can just sit here and eat ice cream and you can tell me about the project that exploded all over your desk.”

Leo groaned. “I actually don’t want to talk about that, either.”

“Boo.” Piper poked him. “You won’t even tell me what it is?”

“That’s part the problem, honestly,” Leo sighed, letting himself flop backwards onto his bed dramatically and gesturing at the ceiling. “I have no idea what it’s trying to be.”

Piper looked down at him, obviously baffled. “Then why are you building it? You could always just start something different with an actual purpose in mind.”

And yeah, in general, Piper was probably right. That would have been easier. But that also wasn’t how Leo operated.

Sure, he had a tendency to start a million different projects and abandon several of them in the middle because his ADHD brain found a shiny new idea to focus on that excited him more. 

But with some projects—like Festus, or the Argo, or this busted chunk of metal—he couldn’t do that. His brain got stuck on every inconsequential little detail of those, and good fucking luck focusing on anything else while that was happening.

Compartmentalizing usually worked okay. With something as big as the Argo, finding smaller steps to break the project into had been doable, especially with Jason and Piper helping and/or letting Leo ramble at them until he figured things out himself.

But breaking his current problem project up into steps when he didn’t even know what it was supposed to be? Yeah, good luck with that.

“I don’t know. It’s one of those things I keep tinkering with, and for some reason I feel like I really need to finish whatever it is. That I can’t seem to manage just makes me want to finish it more.”

Piper got up off the bed and walked over to his work bench to look at the project. Stupidly, Leo felt kind of embarrassed to have her looking at this particular disaster.

She inspected it closely, seeming to give it a lot of genuine thought.

“You know, it kind of looks like the world’s strangest instrument to me,” Piper eventually concluded, holding up the wrecked device. “Here. These wires kind of look like guitar strings to me.”

“Great. So, what, my subconscious was thinking I should play myself a sad song on the world’s weirdest violin?” Leo huffed out a frustrated breath. “Thanks, brain.”

“You’ll figure it out eventually. You rebuilt all of Festus in a few months. I don’t think this weird violin will be the thing that finally defeats you.” Piper sat back down next to him, patting his arm gently. “It’s fine if you can’t figure it out right now, though. Today is for eating breakup snacks and ridiculing shitty romcoms. Sounds good?”

Leo let his head drop onto her shoulder. “Sounds amazing.”

~~~~

They had a great day filled with way too much junk food and absolutely terrible movies.

Leo fell asleep curled up against Piper, like they’d sometimes done back in Wilderness after an especially rough day. That was one of the few memories that Hera hadn’t tampered with. 

This was nice. He felt safe and almost happy for the first time in weeks.

So, of course, his nightmares had to go and ruin things again.

He had the exact same dream he’d had before he’d left Tahlequah, because the godly nightmare factory was not very creative.

“This again?” he shouted into the parking garage. “Seriously? You couldn’t have thought of something more original?”

“You did not heed my warning last time, so it seemed that a reminder was in order,” the deity said. He instinctively knew it was the same one that had tormented him last time, though their voice sounded different—maybe because they weren’t pretending to be anything other than a deity this time.

The words reverberated through the parking garage, but the echo wasn’t the deity’s voice, either—it was much worse. It sounded like a thousand desperate voices all speaking simultaneously.

Leo trembled, heart hammering in his chest with a kind of primal fear he hadn’t felt since he’d been a small child—a fear of monsters under the bed and curtains moving in the dark.

The repeat nightmare was worse than the voice. Leo tried to look away from the fiery tornado. From Piper and her burnt arms and her peeking out of cover to fire her blowpipe. From the parking garage exploding into an inferno that swallowed her whole.

But as much as he tried, he couldn’t tear his gaze away from the horrible scene.

“What do you want from me?” he screamed into the fire, his eyes stinging with tears. 

“I’m doing you a favor, keeping your friend safe from you.” The voice was low, dangerous, and seemed to come from all directions at once. “I know the past that haunts you, little demigod. Choose your path carefully, or it might very well become your present.”

~~~~

Leo startled awake in complete darkness. He was shaking violently, his heart was racing and his skin felt clammy.

He was also clinging to Piper way too tightly. His fingernails had dug into her arms so hard that they left little half-moon marks behind when he finally managed to unclench them. This time, he hadn’t screamed when he’d woken up, but it was still a miracle she remained asleep despite his shaking body and him clinging to her like an industrial clamp.

Piper looked completely peaceful sleeping next to him. She wasn’t afraid of his fire—she never had been, even though she knew what kind of destruction it could cause. She slept like she didn’t even question whether or not she was safe. Like Leo had ever been anything other than a danger to his loved ones.

Even when he tried to wiggle out of her embrace, she still held onto him, making an unhappy whining noise when he finally managed to duck out from beneath her arms.

Leo made himself look literally anywhere else. His eyes caught on the window. He couldn’t remember leaving it open, but it was open now. The moon was a crescent in the sky, barely reflecting any light.

The wind caught in the curtains, moving them gently in the breeze, and something about it startled Leo so violently in his frazzled state that he nearly fell sideways off the bed.

Fuck. Fuck.

He had to force himself to inhale slowly through his nose. He tried to close his eyes and breathe to calm himself, but when he did the vision painted itself over his eyelids again.

He moved to close the window, careful not to make too much noise to avoid waking Piper. When he raised his arm, he realized it was absolutely covered in goosebumps. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something in the darkness was about to jump him, but when he looked around, there was nothing there. 

He laid back down as far away from Piper as the mattress would physically allow. He did not sleep another wink.  ~~~~

The next day, Leo dragged his feet about sending Piper away longer than was probably safe. If he had to let her go, he at least wanted to have Sunday with her, before she had to fly back for school. Before he had to stay away from her for good.

They had another day of snacks and movies and talking, but the looming dread that hung over everything meant it didn’t feel the same. Leo couldn’t relax. Not even a little bit.

Piper noticed, of course. She’d realized he was on edge the moment she’d woken up that morning. But he’d told her the awful magic words “nightmare about Jason”, and she’d just held him about it, not asking any further questions about the topic or his weird behavior.

They tried to make the most of the day—as best as they could, given the circumstances. Leo told Piper about all of his little projects. Piper told him about Shel, and finally being able to spend time with her dad, and about her new school. School still wasn’t great, but it wasn’t Wilderness School bad, and now her dad actually sat down with her to go over the subjects she was struggling with instead of hiring fancy tutors. He was horrible at it, to be clear—math was apparently a fantastic time for both of them—but Piper was just glad he was trying.

Leo was happy for her. He really was.

But even if it hadn’t been for his horrible Piper-related nightmares, he wasn’t sure he could have fit into a life that was so normal after everything that had happened. 

If Piper was ready to leave behind so much of what they’d shared, how long would there even be a place for him left in her world?

“Hey Pipes, can I talk to you about something?” Leo finally brought himself to ask, barely an hour before Piper had to leave for the airport.

“I mean, we’ve been talking all day, but sure! What’s up?”

“It’s been really nice to have you here,” he started, like that would make anything better. Like it would make what he was about to say hurt any less.

“Do you want me to stay for a bit?” Piper asked, something almost hopeful in her voice. “Because I will if you need me to. My dad can call my school, and-”

Leo felt cold all over. He wanted to cry. 

“No. It’s kind of the opposite of that, actually. I’m glad we’ve been IMing each other as much as we have. You know I love talking your ear off every chance I get.” He tried for a weak smile, but he couldn’t really manage. There was a huge lump in his throat, and he could feel the tears stinging in his eyes. “But I think I need some space.” 

Piper looked absolutely crestfallen in a way that made Leo desperate to take the words back. He would have, if this hadn’t been the only way to keep her safe.

“Sorry, I- was coming down here without warning too much? I probably should have asked, but I thought-”

“It wasn’t too much.” Leo reached out to take her hands in his. The last thing he wanted was to make her feel awful for the best weekend he’d had in ages. “I’m so glad you came, okay? You are literally my favorite person in the entire world. But I’ve had some time to think lately, and I… promise you won’t hate me?”

Piper must have been able to tell this was a legitimate concern, because she didn’t even try to joke. She just pulled him to her chest and held him. “You’re my best friend. I love you to death, okay? Nothing you say could change that.”

He couldn’t tell her that he had to keep her away from him for her own safety, because he knew Piper would never have agreed to that. But there was something else he could tell her that was just as painful and just as true and that he was pretty sure would work.

“It’s Jason. Everything’s been so much lately, and I-” He broke off and pressed his eyes shut, not wanting to look at Piper when he said it. “I’m starting to think that maybe I was in love with him.”

“Shit, Leo.” Piper didn’t let go. One of her arms wound more tightly around him. The other gently brushed through his curls like she was trying to soothe a child with a fever. 

“That’s one way to put it, yeah.” 

This was who Leo was, he supposed. He wanted impossible things, and he always knew way too late.

“I’m so sorry.”

“I feel like I’m the one who needs to apologize. What kind of garbage human being falls in love with their best friend’s partner?” he scoffed, kind of wishing Piper would pull away and get mad at him. Kind of wishing she’d never let him go. 

“You’re my best friend, Leo,” Piper repeated, not an ounce of resentment in her voice. “We don’t control these feelings. Hell, I didn’t even actually like Jason in that way.” She was so terribly gentle with him. He didn’t deserve that. He’d never deserved Piper. “You and Jason were always happiest when you were with each other. Anyone with eyes could see that. How could I resent you for wanting to be happy?”

“Not to worry,” Leo said, feeling absolutely awful. “I can resent myself more than enough for both of us.”

It barely sounded like he was kidding. Truth be told, he wasn’t entirely sure it was a joke.

“Please don’t.”

Piper kept holding him for what simultaneously seemed like an eternity and not nearly long enough. 

He held her like one held their breath in a dangerous situation—desperately, afraid that if he let go, it would be the last time, but also knowing he couldn’t keep holding on forever. It felt like letting go might kill him. But holding on might kill her, and that was infinitely worse.

“So, yeah, I don’t know, I just…” Leo sniffled, slowly untangling himself from Piper so he could wipe his tears off on his shirtsleeves. It terrified him how much this felt like an ending. “Things are kind of a lot right now. I need some time to sort everything out with myself, I think.”

“I understand. I’ll give you space to do whatever you need to do to deal with your grief. But I’m still here for you when you need me, okay? I’ll wait for you. I’ve always been good at waiting.”

Leo felt like his chest might cave in. He remembered all the times Piper had pointlessly waited for her dad to call or to visit back in Wilderness, only for him to cancel last minute because he was working on some project or had an interview or any of the other stuff that really shouldn’t have been more important than his daughter. He thought of how long Piper and Jason must have waited for him, only to eventually be forced to admit that they might never see him again.

He thought of Piper, alone, waiting and waiting and waiting, only for no one to ever come back. 

Not her dad, not Jason and definitely not Leo, whose entire life had been built around running and running and running and never looking back.

“I’m awful,” he choked out, the voice from his dream still nagging him from the back of his mind. Leo’s flames had never touched Piper, and somehow he still managed to leave her burnt.

He had to do this. Piper was the one good thing Leo had left, and he had to keep her safe, even if it meant staying away from her. Even if it meant he could only ever love her from a distance.

“You’re not,” Piper said, way too sincerely. “No one our age should have to go through the shit we faced. We shouldn’t have had to fucking bury our best friend. I’m not expected to deal with this well, and neither are you.”

“Why does loving people suck so much?”

“I don’t know,” Piper sniffled, wiping at her own face. Leo hadn’t meant to make her cry, too, but here they were. “We should send a letter of complaint to my mom.”

Leo forced a smile. “I’m in.”

He couldn’t bear the thought of holding her again—couldn’t bear the thought of having to let her go again—but when she grabbed his hands, he could not refuse her.

“If we won’t see each other for a while, can I at least ask you for a favor?”

“Anything you want,” Leo said immediately.

Piper quirked an eyebrow at him. “You should be glad I’m not planning to abuse that offer. I could ask you to do karaoke in front of a crowd. Or to show me your diary.”

“Joke’s on you. I’m an excellent singer, and I don’t have a diary.” Foster families with shitty siblings and boarding schools with shared rooms would have broken that habit for even the most avid diary writer in record time.

“I contest the excellent singer-bit. The Argo wasn’t that big. I definitely heard you singing in the shower at least twice, and I’ll have you know that my ears are still recovering.” 

“No way you’re making fun of me right now. Not when Jason was a million times worse.” Leo tried to smile, but the joke rang hollow.

Piper reached for the blade at her belt. “Hang on to Katoptris for me, okay? If I can’t be with you in person, I at least want to be with you in spirit. You know, just so you remember you won’t get rid of me that easily.” 

She grinned at him, but there was something fragile in her expression, telling him just how desperately she needed him to say yes.

She’d been carrying that blade every day of her demigod life—every moment they’d spent together since the Grand Canyon, and in the months her and Jason had been looking for him. And now she was offering it to him like it was nothing more than a memento. Like it hadn’t been the thing that kept her alive in so many situations.

“But what if there’s a monster attack? You need to have some way to defend yourself.”

“Tahlequah has been pretty light on monsters so far. It’s kind of boring over there. Not that that’s a bad thing,” Piper said immediately, holding the dagger out towards him. “Besides, my charmspeak isn’t going anywhere, and I’m pretty decent at using a blowpipe these days.”

The words hit Leo like a punch to the gut.

If the warning words in his nightmare hadn’t been enough, this fully sealed the deal. He needed her to go, and to stay the hell away from him.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that. I can take care of myself just fine,” Piper said, taking one of his hands back in hers and gently placing it on the dagger’s hilt. 

All Leo could see was burnt arms and a wall of fire.

“I know you can take care of yourself, I just-” Leo forced himself to breathe. Forced his trembling hand to close tightly around the dagger. “I can’t lose you, too.”

Maybe he should have been thankful to be able to keep some part of her, but right now the hilt just felt cold and heavy in his hand. 

“You won’t. I’ll be okay. I promise.”

But Leo knew she couldn’t promise that.  ~~~~

After Piper left, Leo glued himself back to his work bench, trying not to think about it all. Trying not to think about the new weight on his belt. Trying not to think about how alone he felt, and how long it might be before he got to see her again. If he could ever see her again.

Even the thought of throwing himself back into this frustrating project seemed comforting in comparison.

He looked down at the device, trying to make sense of it through Piper’s eyes. Trying to see the weird musical instrument with guitar string wires and work from there.

And finally, it clicked. 

Leo felt like a complete moron for how long it had taken him to recognize it, considering he’d built almost this exact thing before, music box and phonograph and all. 

It was a new and to-be-improved version of the Valdezinator he’d traded Apollo in exchange for a part of the physician’s cure.

Things slotted into place, then. It was suddenly so ridiculously obvious—the connection between death and music and Greek mythology. Part of his brain had understood what it was Leo most desperately wanted to do, even when he hadn’t been able to really let himself think about it yet. 

He thought back to the funeral, suddenly overcome with a sense of determination that he hadn’t felt since Gaia had tried to taunt him into abandoning his friends and he’d decided he was going to punch her stupid face in instead.

Leo wasn’t going to accept things had to be like this. He didn’t have to. There was a precedent for this.

He couldn’t fix the Piper situation right now. He didn’t know how. But he could try to get Jason back. 

Maybe then, the three of them could figure out his weird threatening vision. They’d always been able to figure anything out as long as they were together.

For the first time since he’d found out about Jason’s death, Leo felt almost hopeful.

———

Notes:

Well! This chapter was very upsetting to write! Tragically, I needed to get Piper out of this fic, and she was refusing to leave, so I had to take slightly more drastic measures 💔💔💔

There’s something a little funny about the fact that I had to resort to divine intervention because trying to pry these two apart with a crowbar didn’t work (and there’s obviously in-story reasons why this is happening), but mostly I am very, very sad.

Unfortunately, Leo isn’t exactly disproving Calypso’s point about his tendency to burn bridges, even if he thinks he’s doing the right thing 😔

And if people could stop trying to protect Piper when she didn’t ask for it, that would be grand. (She shall get a short companion fic to tchig eventually, but it may take a minute until I get around to finishing that one.)

I hate Leo thinking he’s a danger to his loved ones and I hate making my girl Piper upset and I hate messing with their friendship, but alas, it had to be done. Piper does not get to third-wheel Orpheus and Eurydice. This is the Leo goes to hell fic, not the Leo and Piper go to hell fic. (The Strings of Fate is arguably the Leo and Piper go to hell fic of my heart, although the context is obviously way different.)

Massive thank you to the people who left comments on the previous chapter, I seriously appreciate it.

Thanks for once again taking the time to read this, and I would love to hear your thoughts! Would especially loveee to hear if anyone has thoughts on the dream/deity situation! I had a lot of fun with setting that up and I’m very curious to see if anyone can guess what’s going on.

Tag List: @poppitron360 @lilyfrey @lady-silkwing @intenebrisobscurat @manygeese @ann-rex @jvneseries

[turboemmy]

your a huge inspiration to me :), do you have any animation tips??

awww cries thank you so muchhh 🥹💖 im so glad to be able to inspire you !!! umm im not sure what to give for animation tips !! 🤔

Everything i know i mostly just taught myself 😳 and im still trying to practice and get better at it bc i dont feel like im very good! I started from humble beginnings of flipnote hatena when i was like. 12. And didnt animate too much until more recently with procreate and procreate dreams ! (And before that id just animate in procreate, export my frames, and try to lipsync in flipaclip. It was rough)

All of what i do is frame by frame stuff.. and i do it best to how i understand it which isnt much 😅 i dont understand keyframes much or timing charts or whatever theyre called. However its Supposed to be done i dont really follow .. i just kinda wing it and hope it turns out good and have to fix things here n there if im not happy with it.

Ive heard really good things about toonsquid and i do own it but also im really weird about my brushes and i reaaaally like being able to use my favorite (dry ink) because i dont like the rougher brushes on there and the feel of it is different.. but doing puppet animation would be really cool some day bc i know that app can do it.. so ive been tryyying to learn it a little bit its really confusing and i cant stay focused on it much 🥹 and i know procreate dreams has several missing features that are needed but i try to make it work anyway since im just more comfortable with the layout..

Sorry for rambling so much haha ive always felt goofy about my process because i just feel like its so stitched together by random things ive just picked up and tried to do because it felt comfortable or looked good enough to me ! I try to remind myself i cant get hung up if something doesnt look professional because i am Not a professional and im just doing stuff for fun :-) but i put heart into what i make because i want everyone to enjoy it as well as myself! So take it a step at a time, i watched some youtube tutorials, and just do fun silly oc things to get myself to practice more ^_^ its easier to work at a slower frame rate and you can always go faster the more confident you feel!

Umm idk heres a look at my crazy canvas on procreate dreams .. my #behindthescenes

^ and also my gallery because sometimes i draw it in procreate and then move it over to dreams.. esp backgrounds !!

[arcade-confetti]

Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest

Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here

Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭

It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony

[quibbs126]

So I tried to do some practice of TF One Optimus and Megatron, starting yesterday

It was because I was thinking about Lux and how I really should have tried to draw these two more beforehand, since I haven’t drawn them properly in a good while (not counting my more simple drawings of them), and I figured my old colors for them probably weren’t accurate anymore

First I just lined and colored the head sketches I had made on that initial Lux idea thing, and I ended up quite liking them in all honesty

But then I realized I probably need to do more so I can figure out all their colors (like for example, Optimus’ red is nowhere on his head). But I didn’t have premade sketches to draw and color over, so I had to draw new ones

I’m gone be honest, while I think yesterday’s Optimus turned out pretty well, Megatron on the other hand, not so much. His head’s fine, but the rest of his body, eh

I think it’s because while I have drawn Optimus before, and with actual screenshots from the movie, I’ve drawn Megatron far less, and I’m usually using this concept art that while generally accurate, has a bunch of details off from the final version. It’s probably also why I constantly forget his cannon, because it’s not here

Also my perspective generally isn’t the best, and it keeps changing from the initial rough shapes to the final. I was able to tweak for Optimus, but Megatron I couldn’t save much

Also my god, these designs are so complicated, they take so long to draw, it’s a whole ordeal. I’m probably spoiled by my own incredibly simple AU designs, but still. Doesn’t help I’m not very good/experienced at 3D. Apparently these two alone took a collective 3 and a half hours, while my normal drawings probably won’t be longer than 2

I’ve half a mind to simplify them more, maybe resemble the Animated style more, but I’m not sure. I’m trying to adhere to the movie’s style more at least in the eyes, and I don’t know if I want to change everything else while keeping that. Or maybe I should, especially since I already don’t make the plates look 3D enough, like they’re sheets rather than plates

I don’t know how people do this, it’s so difficult. But again, I’m probably just inexperienced and spoiled on oversimplification

My anatomy’s also off I think, I still need to figure out how the arms are supposed to work

But yeah, take these I suppose. They aren’t terrible, but they’re nowhere near the quality of someone who’s good at drawing these bots, particularly from TF One

[robotsafari]

redrawing my favorite gba chain of memories scenes with my own interpretations part 1(?):

“You’re thinking about me… You’re afraid of the darkness I command.” (NOT SHIP)

[gxlden-angels]

I've had this account now for 5ish years now. I've been in therapy for years, not exclusively for religious trauma but it's a major part. I've gotten better. I have a lot of content here I could reflect on, but I don't think I want to. I like knowing I progressed. I don't like looking at what from. Usually religious trauma comes up in therapy as an "oh yea...." instead of by name now. It's indirect. Enmeshment. Parentification. Vaginismus. Scrupulous and Harm OCD. Alexithymia. Derealization and Depersonalization. Paranoia.

I'm like, a real adult now I guess. I have a bachelor's degree now. I walk this upcoming weekend. I live in a house and I'm renting out a room with my own money. It has a backyard my cat likes to run around in. I had a job interview in my chosen field today. It went well

Then I'll go back to my family for the weekend and I find out they're spiraling into AI generated christian conspiracy theory videos. Their pastor is preaching about Trump being the anti-christ, and any non-Trump or Conspiracy message is the same thing he's said for the past decade, sometimes word for word. My uncle is convinced he's a prophet. He tells a story about a girl that was paralyzed after not listening to his message. My grandfather is convinced us black people are the true Israelites and chosen people. I thought I was the only one medically neglected by my aunt who's a doctor. I was not. I show her my emotions chart app. She tells me it's good so I can recognize when I feel bad and remember Jesus's love until I'm happy again. It's not normal for your joints to pop out of place apparently. We all learned this at the same time. It's Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. That explains a lot. My grandfather fell asleep to a video about the Ethiopian bible and how other bibles were made to take out miracles by Jesus and angels again. The remote is lodged in his hand so we can't change it

Then I talk about plants and food with my dad and my grandmother. My dad jokingly complains about his mom making him garden with her all day half a century ago. I give her a little kiss on her forehead before I go. My dad sends me home with leftover peach cobbler he made. I eat it with my lunch at my job. I answer phone calls at a front desk. I paid real taxes for the first time this year. I go to therapy and I talk about everything from my sex life to my graduate school plans to my opinions about generative AI (I hate it). I'm like, a real, breathing adult that has autonomy I guess. I'm not even claimed as a dependent anymore. I built my own desk that I bought from Big Lots.

You get where I'm going with this right? I'm not cured or healed by any means. Far from it in fact. I still get a pang of anxiety using the lord's name in vain and a chill down my spine when manifesting feels too close to confessing. It's harder making a personal post about religious trauma now though. It's not necessarily that I'm cured, it's just so engrained that I've created atheistic excuses to stay stuck in my religious trauma. I can pinpoint the source of it if I think about it long enough, so I don't think about it long enough

I'm not afraid to think lustful thoughts because holding lust in your heart is a sin, it's because I feel like a creep. I'm not worried I'll be sent to hell if I make mistakes that take me further from Jesus, I just think making mistakes would make me a bad person and an asshole. These beliefs popped out of nowhere, of course. They aren't influenced by the religious trauma so deeply buried in my head that taking it out would feel like taking out the gray matter of my brain itself. I'm schrodingers's man where I'm only a human when I'm observed. It used to be a deity but then it was you. I'm observed by you and that proved I'm human just long enough to get by when I most needed it. I still have that problem, but I'm seen outside of here. I see myself more often too

I don't want this post to seem like a good-bye, because it's not. I'm just currently in a period of limbo and I feel like the next generation of religious trauma bloggers are rising. I'm too busy arguing with my therapist about why I'm a bad person in a way that doesn't just boil down to "I'm a sinner in need of redemption" in a desperately-secular way. I'm self-aware enough to know that's what I'm doing, but not progressing enough to stop yet. I think what will happen is I'll eventually get frustrated enough to give up on the secular origins of my mental distress. I think a lot of you are in a similar place. You're out long enough that it feels like it should be over. You don't live in the bible-thumping, belt-wielding, gay-bashing, hellscape you once did. You might even be no-contact. You pay taxes now in your apartment. But it's not over. It's still there. It's just harder to say it's Jesus's fault I'm like this. It feels like it's been too long to still blame the bible.

It's not. It's buried in your synapses and neurons and muscles and bones and skin and hair and teeth and it's hard to remember that after 5 years. It's not oozing out into your bloodstream and filling you with enough cortisol and adrenaline to fuel an elephant anymore. It trickles though like a leaky faucet. I think I've lost the plot at this point, but you get it

Like I said, not a goodbye despite what it seems like. I just have to remember that a leaky faucet is still a concern

[shakingparadigm]

horrendously sick and twisted btw

[hirachat]

why is maribug being dragged for 40 days and 40 nights rn 😵‍💫 i was trying to find edits of her and all i could see on twt and tiktok was just salt everywhereee 😞😞

i feel like i went to the maribug store and left with a deep pit in my stomach filled with grief and anger because whyyyyyy 😭 i just wanted to watch sillynette edits and im getting flashbanged with salt and straight up hate FROM PPL WHO DONT EVEN WATCH THE SHOW😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

marinette im sorry they dont get you like i do THEY DONT EVEN KNOW U FR 💔💔💔💔💔

[leakyrectum]

🚨I AM ONLY ON EARLY SEASON 5 OF MASH SO DONT FUCKING SPOIL ANYTHING FOR ME🚨

i am so in love with frank burns its embarrasing tbh. i could fix him. alcoholism could fix him. hes just so adorable when hes full of brainless whimsy.

he has what i call Biff Tannen Syndrome where it's like. if ANYONE else had played him i would hate him but i just cant because larry linville just did such a great job at making him so fucking funny and stupid and cute.

anyway i cant stop thinking about "tarts? :D"

[pantastic-official]

Guess who's maybe back making his own posts?

Hey yall- I actually wanna start posting maybe regular ish on Tumblr again- was I ever? Not really but there was a time I attempted lol. Since ei have my iPad back after it went missing for a few months I can draw again so I'm gonna start posting some of the things I never posted or have drawn recently!

To start here's some TMA character design wip's, apologies for no one having clothes- I wanted to get the body types how I wanted first and just haven't gone back to give them clothes lol. And there's also my two oc's Heaveneil (here as Neil) and Helliot (here as Elliot) as TMA avatars! They're normally an angel and demon but since they'd now just be normal dudes they have normal names lol.

[drwafton]

Made fanart of you-

I'm sorry if this version of you I made you a God-

"I have to say this art is well done! I wouldn't exactly call myself a god though. Still I appreciate it."

[fishparasite]

i think i need to do something for my friend

[piowasthere]

Hello, this is your Secret Valentine. c: I was trying to find more info on your mer!au but couldn't find much besides what's provided with their references. I am unfortunately unfamiliar with SAMS, so I'm unsure how their personalities and relationship differ from canon. Would you mind expending a bit on them for me? Even if it's just a few bullet points on their quirks and how they interact with one another. I'd greatly appreciate it! Thank you and I hope you have a fantastic day and rest of your week.

What? Someone asking me about my lil AU? Wanting to know more?omg r u trying to kill me with happiness? /lh

so like I said before, they kind of differ from both canons actually (both canon to fnaf and to sams)

Sun's more of the silly, happy, chirpy, curious fella

he's friendly if he likes you. But he's also a bit of a bitch. The type to sneak up on you from behind to scare or splash you just cuz he can and he thinks it's funny, it's all affectionate tho he can 100% be a sassy, passive-aggressive, sarcastic ASS if annoyed too bad (think more HW2 toxic, sass queen Sun)

he also has a beef with a surfing board, idk what that is about lmao

Moon is more of a collected, silent figure watching from the back

up until something catches his interest that is, whether in a positive or negative sense he's the quiet kid 101, doesn't talk, doesn't engage, looks at you like he's judging you constantly or planning your demise (it's both) and then he gets comfortable with you

he's very protective of the whole familiá and is like the first person to call when something wrong is going on there are very few ppl that can get to him and get the ✨ sillies ✨ out  (namely Sun, Earth & Solar in a special way; Monty too if he gets the pass into this AU) but once they do, he's a real chill guy, likes to tease and cause mischief too, for good measure 

Sun's & Moon's relationship between each other is more brotherly leaning

tho, everyone's just kinda adopted in and not actually related, mainly cuz they're all different species (and that's also the reason why they all typically stay in different 'ocean zones' and meet once one travels out too far 'n stuff)

they had a 'rough' start but progressively getting better, overall just really caring for one another and being siblings it's quite hard for me to explain it w/o bringing in like 3 years of the show kekw-

there is a Y/n option and they're just kinda whatever u want or need them to be but for now it's in its own AU's au bubble it's just not part of the 'canon' I have going on for it in the bg of this whole thing just for funzies stuff

oh, and I am sorry for the late reply I started writing some stuff down but couldn't get it right, it was too long, then got hit with the worst headache, dizziness, and jazz and trying to work further on it just hurt so then I just scrapped it

here is all the info I think u'd need for this tho if not or curious, just ask away, I'll provide the best info I can (preferably as specified as can be, I am bad with answering questions ;_;)

unless u do wanna go angst, then imma drop back the cut 6 paragraphs of it.

I am pretty open about it, it's just for entertainment after all I ain't gon go choppin' heads for getting smth 'wrong' or interpreting it in your own way it's all good <3

(apologies for any mistakes or nonsense spouting, headache remains)

[what-th3fucc]

@froppyarts07 how could u… my helluva boss hyperfixation is resurrecting because of u…