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bigteefsmallbrain · 3 years ago

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EVEN MORE SOULMATE AU HEADCANONS

Hiya! So, as promised, an Ouran High School Host Club Soulmate AU Headcanons for all 7 of the wonderful hosts! SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG I WAS DUMB AND FORGOT TUMBLR EXISTED!! So without further adieu, I hope you enjoy it!

Tamaki Suoh

The host king

And a bit full of himself

We love him anyways though

He knows he has a soulmate, and he fully believes that they’ll come to the host club

He doesn’t consider you being a commoner

Not till Haruhi mentioned one of her friends having a soulmate like him

“Huh, my friend is always talking about their soulmate, and you act a lot like them.”

Just an off hand comment

“Oh? Well where is this friend? Are they coming to the host club?”

“Tamaki-senpai.. They go to a public school.”

It hit him like a truck, maybe his soulmate wasn’t going to magically appear

“SOULMATE IS THAT TRUE!?”

Insert a very long sigh on your end, in the middle of Math class, really?

“Soulmate, I can’t hear what’s going on, you’ll have to be more specific.”

“YOU’RE A COMMONER!?”

...I’m gonna hit him

You didn’t answer him, thinking he’d take the hint that A) You’re busy and B) That was SO rude!

He didn’t, he kept on blabbering to you about how he didn’t even THINK his soulmate could be a commoner

Forget hitting, I’m going to make him regret being born

Yeah, you’re not a happy camper to say the least

When he’s in Haruhi’s neighborhood he specifically mentions that to you

“Oh, haha, whoops looks like I'm gone for the weekend white boy”

Nah, you’re holed up in your apartment begging for them to leave soon

At the mall

“Hey soulmate guess where-”

“I see you, you don’t see me, I’m r-u-n-n-i-n-g”

Emo corner Tamaki

Till he realizes you don’t know what he looks like

“HAHA! NICE TRY SOULMATE! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE!”

“Blonde hair, violet eyes, tall and lanky, lookin reeeeal out of place in a ‘commoner’ mall? I think I know”

Ah, back to the emo corner he goes

When you do finally meet, it’s because Kyoya had enough and personally invited you to the host club for a day

[Read: Bribed]

So you awkwardly walk up the steps, trying to figure out a map

And you get there, stopping in front of the door

Before getting an idea

Stepping to the side of the door

“Hey soulmate, I’m at the front gate-”

And you hear him scream in delight

Before seeing him zoom by you

That’s when you enter

“Y/N-chan, you are a terrible person”

“I know, it keeps me up at night”

When Tamaki does enter, looking very mopey and sad

All he hears is “By the way, I wasn’t at the gate”

His head snapped up so fast you’re worried it killed him

Until he leaps at you

“I KNEW YOU COULDN’T RESIST MY BEAUTY FOREVER SOULMATE!!”

You’re not being let go of, ANY time soon

Kyoya Ootori

deathnotedeathnotedeathnotedeathnote-

He is literally searching the globe for you

The family police force is constantly on the lookout for someone like you

And anytime you mention something new to Kyoya, he writes it down, then calls the chief of the search to tell them the new information

You can run, but you can’t hide forever

He will find you

Which is terrifying

He loves conversing with you

Literally THE highlight of his day

“The weather here sure is nice, isn’t it?”

“Mhmm! I am a bit scared to go outside though.”

Que his pen snapping as the club looks over at him in horror

“Oh? Why is that?”

“There’s men in S.W.A.T. uniforms, they seem to be looking for someone.”

Oh, it’s just the family police force-

Oh my god it’s his family police force

The most gleeful [and slightly terrifying] smile appears on his face

[The rest of the club are hiding behind a couch, watching]

He already has the force on the line, telling them to knock on nearby houses

When you open the door, it’s a bit of a stare off, before they grab you

Lots of kicking and screaming on your end

I haven’t done anything wrong!?

You haven’t, you’re just Kyoya’s soulmate, it’s my hc, it's how this works-

They just march up into the school per Kyoya's demand request

As soon as Kyoya sees you, he’s like

“Ah, Soulmate, how lovely to meet you in person!”

“I’m sorry, w h a t ?”

“Well you see, you’re my soulmate, it was only a matter of time-”

“So you resort to scaring the hell out of me and kidnapping me?”

“Now, when you put it like that-”

“You mean when I speak the truth of your actions?”

“I-”

“-would like to go home, maybe go back to my online classes, drink the rest of my tea? Thanks.”

Didn’t even give the man a chance

“Now hold on just a minute”

He’s a little annoyed, but also kind of impressed

“Walk and talk sweetheart, my teacher is gonna be pissed and YOU’RE explaining.”

Okay, that’s fair, he supposes

Kidnaped by private police force, meeting my soulmate, LIMO RIDE, is he flexing or is this his daily life!?

He admits, he’s showing off a tiny bit, but you’re his soulmate

Why wouldn’t he want to show off

he has to let you know he can support you!

Your teacher certainly likes him

by the end of the day you had an on campus pass

so you could continue your education from beside him

He’s not against bribery to get you to come onto campus

Clingy? Yes, he is, you’re not allowed to leave anymore

set in stone

No ifs, ands, or buts about it

Like stated earlier, you can run but you can’t hide forever

Way life is

Hikaru Hitachiin

Little devil no. 1

The first thing he did was ask for your clothing size

No! Wait! He’s not a pervert!!

He swears his mom is a seamstress!

I mean, he already matches with his brother, can you blame him for wanting to match with his soulmate too?

The need to match lowers after that first interaction for sure

[As soon as you meet it’s cranked back up to an 11 though]

He knows everything about you, er, what you let him know about you

Rough beginning, and you never fully trust him till you meet him in person because of it

He knows your favorite color

That you prefer one ice cream flavor over the other

Any odd hyperfixation you’ve had

He has a note app where he writes it down because he never wants to forget

He also really cares about your health, so whenever he sits down to eat, you’ll hear his voice ring in your head

“Have you eaten today?”

And it’s like, brunch for them or something and you’re like

“Are you.. Having a snack..?”

Cuz usually he asks you in the morning, noon, and evening, but now..

“What? No, it’s brunch silly!”

Why would his soulmate ask such a stupid question?

“Isn’t brunch a little outdated? Or like just a Sunday thing?”

“..wha?”

One brain cell between the twins, I’m telling you, and Kaoru doesn’t share

He actually leans over to him and asks why his soulmate said brunch was outdated or a Sunday thing

And Kaoru is so done with his brother because it’s the 5th time this week that he has to explain his soulmate is probably a commoner-

He most definitely has a bucket list for things he wants to do with/for you

He wants to make playlists based on how he feels when you first meet face to face

He wants to take you to concerts

He wants to dance with you in the rain

He wants to tell you the most corny pick up lines

He wants to wake up with you in his arms every morning

Yeah, he’s cliché, but he really doesn’t care

He likes talking with you, and is always really touched when you remember things he’s said

He was surprised the first time though

“You REMEMBER that!?”

“Well yeah, despite the.. Rough.. Beginning we had, you’re still my soulmate, why wouldn’t I remember things that happen in your life?”

QUE HIS HEART MELTING! HE CAN’T TAKE THIS LEVEL OF CARE!

It used to be just him and his brother, with an odd voice in his head, but now..

When the two of you meet, it’s probably through Haruhi, and he doesn’t realize it at first

You might have been waiting at her door when she was out for groceries

Might have seen the sleek black cars pull up

Might have heard your soulmate and his friends talk about the apartment complex

Oh boy, you milked the situation as much as you could

“Hey Haruhi! Who are your friends?”

Just really sweet and innocent at first

Whisper your plan in her ear, and honestly? She is so down, those twins got her into this mess, might as well make one of them suffer

“Hey there handsome~”

“Uh, I have a soulmate?”

“Why was that a question?”

He’s so confused, don’t you have a soulmate of your own? Why are you flirting with him?

He doesn’t know, and he has to awkwardly sit there until you say something that makes it click in his head

“Oh, by the way Haruhi, isn’t Brunch outdated? Or like, a Sunday thing?”

“IT’S YOU!?”

You’re cackling on the ground while Hikaru is registering that his soulmate was flirting with him

He turns so red, and he’s a ball of stutters

He’s not red, you’re red, and blind, and stupid-

Tsundere mode, activated

Kaoru Hitachiin

Little Devil no. 2

He also asked for your clothes size, but in a less creepy way

“Hey, my mom is a seamstress, you wanna match?”

He’s actually so cute

I wanna hug him

So bad

As stated previously, he and Hikaru share one brain cell, and it belongs to him, he doesn’t share

That being said, it’s only one brain cell

So while he’s not a creep, he is so very very oblivious

Like, you could give this boy a time and place

And he’ll just remind you that you needed to be there 5 minutes before

“Hey, you mentioned going to [Blank] Park at 12PM earlier, you should head out if you haven’t already”

“..I was inviting you in hopes that we could meet.”

“...OH! OH CRAP! HOLD ON!”

You could give this boy a full, detailed description of yourself

And he would only remember “Oh, they have [Color] hair.. I think..?”

Don’t get me wrong, he wants to meet you

Really, he does

And he remembers most of what you say or like

But when he gets nervous, anything you say goes in one ear, out the other

And he’s too embarrassed to ask again, afraid you’ll not like him

But he also completely forgets to give you a description of himself

So you’re sitting at a park, and all the sudden you watch him pass muttering about someone with [Wrong color] hair to someone on the phone?

You mutter a quick “You will not believe what I just saw” under your breath, fully ready to tell your soulmate about this confused, lost boy.

You see him pause, bidding goodbye to the person on the phone before saying “Yeah? What is it? I’m in the park by the way.”

Oh shit that’s your confused lost boy

So you decide, in a volume equal to his, to say

“Oh, there was this confused lost boy with salmon pink hair talking about a [Wrong color] haired person who just passed me.”

This boy whips his head around so fast, scanning for said wrong color, until your eyes meet and you wave with a smirk on your face

He sits down next to you, embarrassed

“Your hair is [Blank], not [Wrong color]”

“Yeah, pretty sure I told you that.”

He leans on you, whining

“I was nervous and forgot!”

He’s happy, ecstatic even, but so very, VERY embarrassed that he made a fool out of himself

God it’s adorable when he pouts

Please tease him, he’ll whine and complain, but it’s all in good fun

Get ready to meet his twin though now

Not even god can save you from Hikaru’s “Invasive dad mode”

“What college are you going to?”

“Are you gonna be able to support my brother?”

“You break his heart, nobody will find your body.”

R.I.P. You

Haruhi Fujioka

So frustrated with herself when she does realize it’s you

You, her neighbor

Who figured it out the week you both met

And has been patiently waiting for her to figure it out since

Also kind of mad at you for not telling her

But then you hit her with the

“I know you like figuring things out on your own, and don’t like help, so I just wanted you to be happy”

She’s mad, heart warmed and in love, but mostly mad

She gets over it though

Definitely figured it out when she got inducted into the Host Club

And you were oh so smug with her when she came by your flat to tell you

Kind of just clicked like

“Wait.. you knew this happened? I’ve only told-”

Pauses

Loading…

Blue screens

Then proceeds to hit you

“ALL THIS TIME!? AND YOU KNEW!?!?”

When she calms down and you stop laughing your guts into oblivion

You tell her that Ranka knew as well

Que her hitting the poor parent when they get home

The host club doesn’t realize that your her soulmate when you eventually do meet

Other than Kyoya

He knows everything

AKA Ranka totally told him

Probably asked you to join in with the genderswap episode to get Haruhi to stay in Ouran

Everyone else is like “Who’s that and why are they helping?”

Then Haruhi comes in like “Who the hell dragged my soulmate into this!?”

And since then you have known no peace

No really

You’ve become a bargaining chip of sorts

“I’m not doing it-”

“I’ll let [Name] on campus for a week”

“...I’m doing it”

Mitsukuni Haninozuka and Takashi Morinozuka

They’re a package deal shut up-

They weren’t too surprised that they were soulmates

They were more surprised to find that they were one of the very rare few to have a third soulmate

If you weren’t a baker or sweets lover before, you are now

Mitsukuni definitely has long winded conversations with you about different kinds of sweets

They both like to listen to you talk about how to prepare different dishes and deserts

Both have most definitely tried at least once to prepare something with you

Didn’t turn out how they imagined, but they tried

You probably started taking an interest in martial arts

Maybe not practicing or doing them, but you keep up with competitions and such

Takashi surprisingly speaks to you a lot, not necessarily about anything, but he enjoys talking to you

Customers at the host club are swooning and jealous, like, ‘where's my cute soulmate trio??’

Everyone is 100% convinced that when you meet you’ll bring the fluff and cute meter to 1 million

Also convinced that you’ll be in the host club

Mitsukuni and Takeshi know very different though

“Host club? Nah nah nah, Baking club? Hell yeah”

Baking extraordinaire

Would rather die than give people false hope or toy with their feelings

Like, you get why your soulmates do it, to make others happy

But you also know the repercussions

You’ve probably had to console one or both of them for feeling horrible about rejecting someone's feelings

Could never see yourself able to do such a thing

But also, you’re just not going to Ouran

You’re in Japan's top culinary school, you’re not downgrading to petty pink rich people school

[Mitsukuni definitely tried to convince you though]

[Takeshi did too, but more subtly]

Probably met when Ouran was holding some kind of baking competition with your school

And you were chosen to represent your school for the competition

And Mitsukuni dragged Takeshi to watch the showdown with the other hosts

They only realize that it’s you up there, competing against their school, when you begin muttering instructions to yourself, and they hear you speaking to them, but the person up there is doing the same thing-

Mitsukuni definitely had to be held back from jumping up there to see you

He was so pouty the whole time after that

Like, yes, he liked watching you work, but he wants to hold you more

Takeshi wants too as well, but knows it would distract you, and wants you to do well

They definitely had Mitsukuni come up to be a partial judge with the other judges

Until you state he’s one of your soulmates

Que the ENTIRETY of people watching shouting in surprise

And Takeshi and Mitsukuni both stated that, yes, they were their soulmate, but how did you know?

“You said you like sweets and were a part of Ourans Host Club Mitsukuni, and they announced you as ‘Ourans resident sweet loving Host’ It was kind of obvious”

Unofficial hostess/baker since that point

“Is [Name]-senpai coming around today?”

“Yeah! She’s bringing Persimmon Cookies today too!!”

I Hope you enjoyed reading the third set of Soulmate AU HC’s! If you would like to see any specific characters, don’t be afraid to leave a comment or submit an ask! I’ll be doing a fourth set later today/tomorrow, so be on the lookout! I hope you enjoyed reading!!!

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sapphirefox1510 · 2 years ago

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I titled this chapter "A Wizard and their Glowing Plants" and it just brings me some joy. I also figured out the next few parts of this story and it's not how I initially thought it would go, but it works, so I'm happy.

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Ok, yes, it was probably wrong of me to use Osirus as an excuse to take a break from work to hang out with my friend. In my defense, I was ahead on my work, and proofreading is boring so. I lead him to Inanna’s tent, where she spends entirely too much time taking care of her cotton plants and experimenting on them.

“Hiiiii,” I say, entering the tent.

“Hildey! Come here, come here.” Inanna waves me over to a corner of the tent where she’s kneeling by one of the many cotton plants cluttering the room.

“What did you alter this time, ya nerd?” she sticks her tongue out at me.

“I’ve been testing what colors I can make the cotton grow in so we can skip some of the dying processes that dim the color. It didn’t come out as dark as I hoped, but look at this pink.”

“That is a pretty shade; maybe it can be used for decoration rather than symbols.”

“That’s a good idea.” She hops up to scribble that down in one of the notebooks scattered on the table in the middle of the room. “Who are you?”

Whoops forgot he was here. “Inanna, this is Osirus. I’m supposed to be keeping an eye on him for a few hours. Osirus Inanna”

“Hi,” Osirus very dully greets.

“Nice to meet you. You’re not wearing any identifiers. You must be from above ground,” Inanna analyzes him.

“Yeah. You guys are really into those symbols, aren’t you?”

“It’s an easy way to keep track of people; it works much better than what you guys have up there.” She finally gets around to scribbling down the note she wanted to.

“We don’t have anything designed to designate what job people have or who they’re related to.”

“Exactly.”

Osirus turns to me, “Is everyone down here rude?”

“no, you’ve just only managed to run into the snarky people. Which is kind of your fault for following me down here,” I answer with a smug look. He gives me an unamused look at that.

I feel something tug on my leg and look down to see the little dragon I brought to Ossian. He sinks his claws into my pants and climbs up me again, returning to his place under my collar. “oh, the little menace is back.”

“is that a small dragon?” Inanna asks.

“yeah, they ran to me after seeing Osirus and hid under my jacket collar. I took them to Ozzy, but it looks like they ran away to find me for some reason.”

“Maybe they’ve bonded with you,” Osirus suggests.

“Dragons don’t just bond with people, and the last time I saw this one, they wouldn’t even let me touch them; they just hissed at me.” I wave off his statement.

“It’s possible they think you’re the only safe place here,” Inanna says. “Small dragons always seem to be looking for the safest hiding places.”

“maybe.”

I see the tent flap get pushed aside as another person enters the tent looking down at a piece of cloth. “hey Inanna, I-” he looks up. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t expect there to be other people here.”

“It’s fine, Zeki,” I say.

“do you need something,” Inanna asks.

“I tore my shirt on my run today. I went to get it mended, but they didn’t have the right thread, so they sent me here to get it,” Zeki answers.

“what color?”

“just plain white.”

Inanna nods and pulls a chest out from under the table we’re standing around. “it’s gonna take a little while. You can wait here or come back later.” She pulls out a fluffy bundle of white cotton and a spool. As she heads over to the spindle to get it all set up, Zeki goes to sit on a blanket piled with pillows nestled in the corner of the room. It’s there for when Inanna’s been working too long and needs a nap or for people who want to hang around and chat or help card the cotton.

“Have you spoken to the record keepers yet,” I ask?

“no, not ye.t I wanted to drop off my shirt first. I didn’t expect to be sent on errands.” Zeki says while settling down.

“I’ll grab some paper and a pen.” I leave the tent to grab the necessary materials.

When I return, Osirus is sitting with Zeki, “making friends?”

“I’m just asking some questions,” Osirus replies.

“don’t go stealing my job.” I sit down with the duo.

“what even is your job?”

“record keeper. I write down stories and events so we have an accurate history of everything that happens here.”

“sounds boring”

I shrug “doesn’t matter how you feel, now let me work,” I turn to Zeki, “Tell me what happened up there.”

Zeki tells the story of everything that happened from when he left camp to when he got back, including a list of all the goods they collected. As we’re talking, the little dragon migrates to my lap, and Osirus reaches out to let them sniff his hand. The little creature surprisingly lets him pet them.

“so you just go above ground to collect goods you can’t make down here,” Osirus asks.

“and to collect the local news once every week, although it might happen more or less around holidays,” Zeki answers.

“hey, Zeki, catch,” Inanna tosses a spool of freshly made white thread to him, which startles the dragon into skittering to Osirus.

“Thanks,” Zeki smiles at Inanna. “See you around,” Inanna waves as he leaves the tent.

I turn to Osirus. “We should leave Inanna to her work and see how Chieftess Aurelia is doing.”

Osirus nods. “Right, let’s go,” He carefully picks up the dragon.

#writeblr #my writing #ocs #dragons #first draft #third chapter #writing #I still don't know how to tag but we're rolling with it

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afeb · 4 years ago

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Bucky Barnes - Old Man

“Please let me take you to lunch,” Yori begged.

“Don’t feel like you have to pay me,” I said. “I like cleaning and doing your laundry.”

Yori cocked a brow. “No one likes doing that,”

“Well I guess I’m someone then,” I winked back. Yori simply folded his arms and tapped his foot impatiently. “Fine, where are we going?”

“Don’t worry, I know a place,” he smiled as he got his coat.

We walked slowly through the busy streets of Brooklyn, Yori holding onto my arm. He casually pointed at shops and told me what used to be there, who lived there and where they went. I longed to sit him down and pick his brains, but his memory was starting to fade so I simply took what I could get.

“Bucky!” My eyes snapped up as Yori exclaimed to a man walking towards us.

An easy smile graced the mans face. “Yori,” his voice was deep and velvety.

“We’re going to lunch, join.” The old man insisted.

Bucky’s eyes nervously flicked over to me. “I don’t wanna intrude,”

Yori waved him off and stepped away from me, walking considerably faster down the sidewalk than he had before. “Come! I’m nearly there!”

We both laughed and looked at each other. “I’m Y/N,” I introduced.

“Bucky,” he smiled back.

Despite the Brooklyn summer heat, he wore a thick leather jacket and gloves. His jeans were black and top navy blue. I was in a white, summery dress and I almost noted aloud how opposite we looked.

Instead, we both hurried after Yuri who was almost out of sight. The restaurant claimed to serve British Cuisine, and I chuckled a little.

“Slice of home,” Yori said to me.

“How very considerate of you,” I smiled.

“I went to the UK once,” Bucky piped up. “My pal married a girl from there.”

“Really?” I said. “What took you to my side of the pond?”

“The war-“ he stopped mid-sentence.

I furrowed my brows, he looked far too young to have taken rank in any war that would take him to the UK. “Afghanistan?” I asked.

Bucky quickly nodded. “Yeah,”

The conversation died as we found a table and sat. Yori looked at both of us with a sly smirk, trying to hide it behind his menu. Bucky and I both glanced at each other.

Suddenly, Yori slammed down his menu. “Whoops, I forgot, I’m meeting with another friend,” he began to get up.

“Wait, what?” Bucky frowned.

“Have fun on your date!” Yori waved as he hurried out the restaurant.

There was a beat of silence as Bucky and I both frowned. “I feel we’ve been set up,” I finally said.

“I feel that too.” Bucky laughed.

“Well I don’t know about you, but I’m getting fish and chips,”

The conversation flowed easily. Bucky said he was born in Brooklyn and noted how much the area had changed since his youth. I felt as though that was an inside joke I didn’t understand when he said it, a smirk playing on his lips as he spoke. He asked what brought me here and the boring answer was work.

“What do you do?” Bucky asked as he pushed some Shepard’s Pie on his plate.

“I’m a Historian,” I smiled. “It isn’t as boring as it sounds.”

Bucky laughed. “I love history actually,”

“Any particular parts?” I leant back in my seat.

Bucky shrugged. “World Wars and onwards,” another inside joke I wasn’t part of.

“I did my thesis on American Impact during the Second World War,” I said.

Bucky leant forward. “And?”

“Steve Rogers alone was enough to help morale in the Europe,” I giggled.

Bucky’s brows furrowed. “Really? The guys in Europe hated him. I remember when he-“ Bucky stopped talking.

“You’ve done that a lot,” I said after a moments silence.

“Done what?” He asked.

“Talked like you were there,” I explained. “Like there are all these inside jokes I don’t know.”

“Dunno what you’re talking about.” His eyes glistened.

“About Brooklyn changing, you in the UK, the World Wars,” I listed off. “Would it be too ridiculous to say you’re 100 years old?” I joked.

“106.”

“What?”

“I’m a 106.” I laughed until I saw the look of his face.

“No you aren’t,” my brain began to connect the dots. “Bucky...Buchanan...you’re James Barnes?”

His eyes cast down as he nodded. “I’ll go,”

Bucky quickly stood. “Wait! Why?” He didn’t reply as he sprinted out of the restaurant.

Without thinking I bolted after him. He was quick, half way down the street. I ran behind him, taking a long moment to catch up. Finally I caught his arm and jerked him back.

“Why are you leaving?” I panted.

“Look, you don’t have to be nice, I know that when people find out who I am they don’t usually wanna talk to me,” he grumbled.

“Are you kidding me?” I gaped. “You’re my dream!”

His brows furrowed. “What?”

“You’re a comprehensive, fully functioning 106 year old!” I smiled. “Your memories alone could make a book,”

“You don’t wanna know what goes on in my head,” he darkly warned.

My lips pouted. “Of course I do,”

His eyes cast down to me. “Hey! Hey you two!” We both turned to see a frantic waiter coming towards us. “I’ll call the police if you don’t pay!”

Bucky presented his wallet and took out a wad of cash. “Sorry,” he stiffly smiled.

The waiter huffed and grabbed the cash, walking away. “Please just...” I sighed. “We don’t have to talk about memories, I enjoyed our lunch, I find you interesting,”

“Really?” He seemed taken aback.

“Really.”

His lips pursed as he momentarily closed his eyes. They opened softer than before. “I know this bakery, wanna...grab a coffee?”

I beamed up at him. “I’m paying.”

“Not a chance.”

“Old fashioned I see?” I giggled.

“It’s an old man you see.”

#bucky #barnes #bucky barnes #james buchanan bucky barnes #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes smut #sebastian #stan #sebastian stan #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan angst #sebastian stan smut #marvel #winter soldier #winter soldier imagine

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flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash · 4 years ago

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Irresistible Danger - Part 57

Synopsis: After being caught outside the compound on your own, Negan decides to punish you in the best way possible ;)

Words: 3,388

Warnings: nsfw, smut, swearing

ID Masterlist can be found HERE

Masterlist of all my fics can be found HERE

Author’s Note: We’re interrupting the emotions and angst for a healthy dose of smut in this one.

A Wonderfully Well-F*cked Morning

You drifted to consciousness on a wave of pleasure, the sensations happening below your waist causing you to automatically arch your back and reach down. When your fingers came in contact with thick, soft hair at the same time that a wet tongue hit your clit, your brain finally decided to come online. Eyes opening in surprise, you looked down and found the breathtaking visual of Negan’s gorgeous face buried between your thighs.

Holy shit, what a way to start the day.

Glancing up, his mouth curled in a soul-stealing grin at the sight of you awake and watching. His “mornin’ doll” was spoken directly to your soaked cunt, the rumbled vibration of the words making you give a small moan and open your thighs wider, so he could do as he wished.

And, apparently, what he wished was to drive you absolutely mad with desire. The distant and withdrawn Negan of last night was gone, and in his place was the playful and passionate man before you. He teased with soft kisses along the crease at the top of your thigh and lazy laps of his tongue that just barely grazed where you needed them. When you tried to lift your hips in search of more friction, his large hands pinned them to the mattress.

It wasn’t long before you had a deathgrip on his hair, thighs trembling, and even the muscles in your stomach starting to quiver. And yet still he continued, the devilish gleam in his eyes when he glanced up at you while gently sucking your clit almost enough to send you over the edge, until he backed off and went back to nipping at your inner thighs instead.

You were just about to beg, plead, and promise whatever he wanted, including your soul, when a muffled knocking sound broke through the top layer of hazy desire shrouding you. Negan ignored the noise, continuing with his delicious torture so that you almost instantly forgot the sound had ever happened. But then it came again a few seconds later, this time loud and sharp...and right outside the bedroom door.

Letting go of his hair and jolting up onto your elbows, you looked down at Negan with wide eyes. He had finally lifted his head from your pussy, the sight of his lips glistening with your wetness causing a soft moan to escape that you prayed whoever was at the door didn’t hear.

“Fucking leave!” he yelled in that no-nonsense tone that both terrified and yet also made an extra trickle of wetness run down your thigh.

The voice that responded was muffled through the door, but still unmistakably Simon. “Sorry, boss, but there’s a situation that needs your urgent attention in meeting room C.”

Cursing harshly, Negan dropped his forehead to your lower stomach for a few seconds before lifting his head and yelling back, “I’ll fucking be there in 5!”

You stared in the direction of the office and listened for a few seconds until the unmistakable sound of Simon banging the door closed sounded (perhaps a bit louder than needed, as if he was letting you know that he was gone). You turned back to Negan, who now had a devious smirk on his face as he looked up at you.

Giving a doubtful expression, you said, “Only five minutes?”

“Oh, doll,” he chuckled, head ducking down so the rest was muffled against your wet flesh. “That’s plenty of time.”

It was then that you realized just how much he had been toying with you before, as his demeanor instantly changed from playful to intense, and he set to work on your cunt. He knew just where to nip and lick, and when he latched onto your clit and sucked with the perfect amount of pressure, you shot off like a rocket, coming in less than a minute from when Simon had left.

Still panting and sprawled across the mattress, you watched dazedly as he got up and went to his armoire for clothes to get dressed. He winced when tucking his erection into the boxer briefs and dark grey pants, and the bulge made your mouth water.

“What about you?” you asked with a nod in his cock’s direction.

Pulling on his boots, he then straightened and trailed desire-bright eyes over your sated form spread out on his bed. “I thought I already made that clear, doll,” he quipped.

Unsure if it was the post-orgasm haze making you so dense or if he was purposely being vague, you asked, “What’s that?”

Walking around the side of the bed fully dressed, while you lay totally naked with thighs still spread and naked chest heaving, he ran a warm, calloused hand down over your throat and the tips of your breasts before answering.

“That this relationship is about more than me getting my fucking rocks off.”

His hand moved lower, between your thighs, and he watched as if mesmerized at how you shuddered and arched into the feel of his touch on your still-sensitive flesh. “However, that being said-” he backed up a step and pointed at you with a stern look on his face, “-don’t fucking move from that bed until I get back.”

He then tucked his tongue into his cheek, gave a playful wink, and was gone. Staring up at the ceiling, you figured this was one order you’d gladly follow, seeing as how your muscles wouldn’t be able to function properly enough to help you stand, anyways. It wasn’t until a couple minutes after he was gone that you sat straight up on the bed at the remembrance of his earlier words.

He had called it a relationship!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Forty-five minutes later and you, unsurprisingly, were in fact not able to follow his order, after all. Which shouldn’t be a surprise because, well, it was you we were talking about here, and when did you ever listen?

You had tried though, really you had. After Negan left, and your breathing and heart rate had returned to normal, you sat up against the headboard to wait. Your eyes landed on a book that was open facedown on his bedside table, and the parallel to your own reading habits made you smile. Picking it up, you saw that it was some sort of psychological thriller. Making a note of what page it had been opened to, you huddled down into the plush mattress, the soft black headboard at your back, and started reading from the beginning.

However, when the black and grey wall clock near the door ticked by almost an hour that he had been gone, you put the book down and sighed in annoyance. Whatever the emergency meeting had been about, it looked as though it might take a while, and you didn’t enjoy the thought of sitting here all morning and afternoon waiting, as if at his beck and call. Your brain also unhelpfully threw out the reminder of your previous plan not to have sex with Negan until a serious conversation was had about that damned padlocked box of unanswered questions. The subconscious, exasperated with the brain pulling this bullshit so early in the morning, yelled at it to please shut the hell up.

Fuck it, you can at least freshen up a bit before he gets back, you thought while tossing off the sheet and standing from the bed. Stretching pleasantly sore muscles, you wandered over to the large armoire and tugged open one of the drawers. Smiling at how neatly the clothes inside were folded, you selected a moss green shirt and pulled it over your head. It was much baggier than his usual style, and you had never seen him wear it before, making you wonder if he ever got a chance to take off his leader armor and just sit around relaxing the day away in baggy sweats with a good book. Probably not, seeing as how he couldn’t even enjoy a perfectly delightful you-flavored breakfast without being interrupted.

Heading into the bathroom to relieve your bladder and then wash your hands and face, you looked in the large mirror. Finger-combing hair that had seen better days, you then opened up some of the drawers under the sink that you hadn’t checked yet, mostly out of nosey curiosity. Finding one at the bottom that was stocked full of extra bars of soap, toothpaste, and still-packaged toothbrushes, you let out a tiny whoop of joy. Jackpot!

Opening a green and white toothbrush, you grabbed the already opened toothpaste that was on the countertop and squeezed a dollop onto the brush. Giving a sigh of happiness at the clean, minty taste, you weren’t even worried about Negan being upset you had stolen one of his unopened brushes. Especially since you’d have fresh breath when he crawled back in the bed with you and-

That fantasy died a quick death when the reflection of the man himself stepped into view while you were mid-brush. Locking eyes with him in the mirror, you saw a flicker of something in his expression as he took you in, standing there in his shirt and brushing your teeth with his personal supplies.

“I thought I told you to be in the fucking bed when I got back,” he said, but his voice didn’t have the extra little growl that signified he was truly pissed. In fact, he almost sounded amused.

Before you could even remove the toothbrush to respond, he stepped up behind you so that his front was pressed into your back. “Nevermind, doll,” he drawled while still holding your gaze in the mirror. “This’ll work too.”

You almost choked on toothpaste from gasping at the feel of his large, rough hands running up under the hem of the shirt and over your bare hips. Quickly leaning down to spit out the paste into the sink, you turned on the water and used a cupped hand to rinse out your mouth as he continued rubbing his palms along your torso and down over the outside of your thighs. When you put the toothbrush down and straightened, his mouth immediately attacked the back of your neck, sucking and nipping lightly. His hands moved further up under the shirt to cup your breasts, and his deft fingers pinched and twisted sensitive nipples at the same time that he ground his hips against your bare ass, letting you feel the ridge of his erection through the rough fabric of the pants.

You moaned softly and pressed back into him, almost overwhelmed by how quickly he had barged in and taken control of your body’s reaction. Any thoughts of self-doubt or questions of where you stood with him temporarily flew out the window in the face of the onslaught of intense and thorough possession he was directing your way.

Unlike when you first woke up this morning, no part of him was teasing or going slow this time around. He quickly pulled the baggy shirt up over your head, and the sight of you totally bare made a groan punch from his chest.

He whipped his own shirt and pants off in a quick flurry of movement before leaning in so that his warm chest was pressed into your back as he opened one of the drawers at your hip and pulled out a condom.

Wasting no time, he opened it and rolled it down the swollen cock pressing into the small of your back. When he bent his knees to line up with your entrance, you assisted by hiking a knee up on the edge of the countertop, presenting yourself to him in a way that made him pause for a moment, as if in awe, before plunging inside you with a fierce thrust and strangled growl against the back of your neck.

You looked up and were instantly transfixed by the sight in the mirror. Negan’s tattooed, leanly muscled form towered over yours, his rough edges and possessive thrusts juxtaposed against your softer curves and arching form.

You watched his reflection as he gripped your hips and looked down between your bodies to watch himself fuck you, the sight making you moan and clench around his cock. His gaze lifted, amber eyes locking on yours in the mirror.

One of his hands left your hip, trailing hungrily around the front of your body and up over your stomach and breasts before wrapping long fingers around the front of your throat. The grip was light, but the ruthless ownership behind both it and his pumping hips made your eyes flutter closed in ecstasy.

He leaned in over you, breath coming in hot strikes against the side of your throat. “You like this, don’t you, pretty girl? Like being all. Fucking. Mine.”

The last words were each punctuated by a harsh thrust, making you cry out and open lust-filled eyes. His face was there beside your own, jaw clenched as he watched your reflection in the mirror with a fierce, almost pained expression. He let out a little snarl before turning his mouth to nip at the curve of your shoulder, and that combined with his grip at your throat and heavy, thick cock fucking you against the counter all combined to throw you into an orgasm without warning. He groaned as you shuddered and clenched in his hold, his gravel over sandpaper voice in your ear.

“Yes, milk my fucking cock.”

Coming down off the wave of pleasure, you realized that his pace hadn’t slowed down, that he hadn’t finished yet. You lowered the leg propped up on the counter, needing both feet braced against the cool, tiled floor to keep your shaky body steady.

Your gaze dropped, taking in the reflection of what was happening between your thighs. Both his cock and the inside of your thighs glistened with a coating of your release, and he felt even bigger inside of you, now that your walls were a little swollen and tender from both the friction of his cock and your recent orgasm. Right when his movements became almost too overwhelming against your oversensitized cunt, and you were about to ask for a break, he paused his thrusts and removed the hand from around your throat.

Your thought that he was granting you a reprieve was instantly proven wrong when he gave a growled warning of, “Brace your arms on the sink,” right before his forearms hooked down under both your knees and lifted your entire lower body off the ground. Since the action pushed you forward, your body had no choice but to do as he said, forearms holding the weight of your upper body against the surface of the sink while your lower half hung suspended at the perfect height for his cock.

He resumed his quick pace, fucking into you relentlessly. And, surprisingly, instead of becoming too much, the sensations pulled back from borderline painful and started to feel pleasurable again. Very pleasurable.

Your whimper caused him to give a low moan in response, and his voice came through gritted teeth. “That’s it, doll. Fucking come for me again.”

Trying to find your voice, you wanted to say that you weren’t sure if that was possible, that coming again so soon wasn’t likely. Instead, the words choked in your throat when he bent down and licked up your spine before sucking roughly on the skin of your back. He then ground his cock into you so hard that your pelvis pushed against the edge of the counter, the hard surface rubbing over your clit in exactly the right way needed to send your body spasming into a second orgasm.

You lost yourself in pleasure that had no beginning and no end, just endless heavy waves of bliss. Dimly, you heard him give a groan of completion as he gave a few sharp, hard thrusts, and then his body went still. He allowed your legs to lower to the tiled floor, and thank god for being braced on the countertop, otherwise you would’ve crumpled in a quivery heap at his feet.

You took in the reflection of both you and Negan’s sex-dazed expressions, skin flushed and dewy with sweat despite the cool bathroom. A satisfied smile curved his lips, and you watched in the mirror as he bent down and kissed the curve where your neck met shoulder, the scratch of his beard rising goosebumps to the already sensitive flesh. He hummed happily against your skin, and you wished that the two of you could stay in this intimate bubble forever. That no outside intruders or internal thoughts could stand in the way of feeling like this with him every single day.

As if he were thinking something similar, he ran a warm hand down over the curve of your hip and said in a sexy, husky voice, “Now that is a perfect fucking way to finish off the morning.”

Unable to help a dreamy smile in return, you were finally able to fully stand up from the counter without fear of your legs giving out. Turning in his hold, you twined arms up around his neck and tugged him down for a proper kiss involving lips and tongues and even a hint of teeth.

You pulled away after a few long moments, and offered, “What are your plans for today?”

Biting his lip and giving one of his signature cheeky grins, he replied, “I have to go over some new outpost security measures with Simon this afternoon. However…” his hands cupped your ass and kneaded possessively, “my evening is all fucking yours.”

Lord, but you liked the sound of that. Standing on tiptoe and placing another, softer kiss to his lips, you suggested, “How about I bring us dinner around 7:30?”

“I’ll be waiting,” he replied with one last squeeze of his hands before he stepped away to dispose of the condom and gather both your clothes off the tiles.

The men had brought back some freshly butchered deer meat from the supply run, and Ben had been excited to try making stew with both it and vegetables from the garden. Thinking of Ben was also a reminder that you had promised to hang out with him today. You were very curious to hear details about what was going on with him and Simon, not to mention needing a friend to talk through some of your own worries regarding Negan.

Pulling the baggy green shirt back on, you preceded him into the bedroom and grabbed your jeans from where they had been discarded on the floor last night. You didn’t want to return his shirt, so tucked it into the jeans to hide the obviously ill-fitting length of it before pulling on your sneakers. Turning, you found an also fully-dressed Negan watching you. His gaze took in the outfit with an expression that was difficult to decipher, but seemed somewhere between appreciative and smug at the sight of you in his shirt.

Struggling not to roll your eyes or make a comment about “males and their strange possessiveness”, you walked out of the bedroom with him following behind. Stopping at the closed office door, you turned and looked up at him, unable to resist the urge to reach up and run your fingers down over his bearded cheek. He bent and gave you one final kiss in return, then opened the door and watched you leave.

You weren’t able to contain the happy grin tipping up the corners of your mouth. Not even the sudden appearance of the brain, who was dragging the padlocked box of questions, could dim your mood. The subconscious strode happily at your side, but as the brain fell more and more behind, struggling to keep up with the heavy metal box, it turned with a sigh and went back to help.

I know. I know! We’ll have a conversation with him tonight; open up the box and air out some of those unanswered questions. But for right now, we’re going to bask in the afterglow of such a wonderfully well-fucked morning.

The brain and subconscious didn’t argue, just huffed and puffed as they worked together to finally pick the box up off the ground. Balancing the heavy weight between them, they gave each other exasperated looks, then hurried down the hall after you.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

#negan #twd #negan smut #negan fanfics #negan fanfiction #irresistible danger #ash writes #the walking dead #twd negan #negan's thirst squad #negan x you #negan slow burn #slow burn #negan x reader #the walking dead negan #fanfic #fanfiction

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tsukishumai · 4 years ago

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Away Games - MSBY Black Jackals

A/N: WOW it feels so so long since i’ve done an HC i kinda feel like i forgot how to :( ahhh im sorry this one sucks LOL but im feeling a bit burned out & this brought me a lil comfort so i hope it brings some for u too :)

Bokuto

Shamelessly facetiming you every possible second.

He’s not terribly upset to be away, to be honest, because he’s doing what he loves, but a huge part of him still misses you.

So he settles for the next best thing

And it doesn’t matter what you’re doing; if you’re at work, if you’re out shopping, if you’re sitting on the toilet – Bokuto will blow up your phone until you answer.

“What took you so long to answer?” “Kou, I was on the toilet.” “No way! Me too! Soulmates <3”

He’s always telling you stories about the dumb things that go on during practice, he complains about how his shoulder’s been feeling a little tense lately, and the food at the hotel reminds of the food they used to serve at Fukurodani

But he always wants to hear about your day too. He asks if your coworker is still being a jerk, he wonders if you managed to try the new drink at the café you mentioned the other day, and he reminds you that he’s coming back in a couple days, so make sure you remember to pick him up from the airport!

When he can’t facetime, he’s sending you videos; videos of the guys goofing off at practice, videos of him working out, videos of behind the scene interviews.

He’s sad you don’t get to be there with him but he does everything he can to share his experiences with you anyway

Bokuto even started his own personal tradition during every away game

If MSBY wins, he sends flowers to your door step.

If MSBY loses, he still sends you flowers anyway because he just wants you to know that he’s thinking of you always

Atsumu

He doesn’t want to admit it, but Atsumu goes into emo mode whenever he’s away.

When you ask him how he’s doing, he’ll always tell you that he’s fine

But the pictures Bokuto and Hinata sent you of Atsumu crying into his protein shake tell you a different story.

You try to make him feel better by sending him tiktoks and memes, and it works for a second, until he sees a mug in the tiktok that looks JUST like the mug you got for him when you first started dating, and now all he’s thinking about is how he wants go back home and drink his coffee from that mug, not the cheap paper ones from his hotel room and god, can the days go by any slower?

talk about dramatic

But you can never stand to see Atsumu so down

And you don’t do this every single time, but when MSBY loses and Sakusa was the one to text you a video of Atsumu staring longingly out his hotel window, you asked him what city their next game was going to be in, and bought yourself a plane ticket there.

You don’t want to spoil Atsumu like this. You really don’t, and you usually won’t

But when you walk into the gym, Atsumu’s eyes land on you, and his entire face lights up, his whole demeanor changes, he’s standing a little taller, his smile a little wider, and all of a sudden, the whole room just felt so much brighter.

He’s in the middle of a pre-game interview, and all of a sudden his words trail off and the interviewer’s like “Miya-san? You were saying?”

But he can’t wait any more, so he’ll excuse himself, and all cameras are on him when he scoops you up from the floor and plant kisses all over your face.

You don’t always spoil Atsumu like this, but when he points at you after scoring his third service ace in a row, you know you’ve done a good thing

Sakusa

grumpycat.jpg

Sakusa doesn’t tell you he misses you because he doesn’t really think he does? It’s normal for professional athletes to spend time away from their s/o, right? This was to be expected, Sakusa knew you guys would have to spend some time apart, he was prepared for this.

Still, irritation floods through him when he wakes up to a shrill alarm instead of your sweet voice.

He snaps at Bokuto when he has to eat the team’s provided lunch, and not the lunch you make and pack for him.

He’s particularly cranky when his uniform was wrinkled on game day, and you weren’t there with your emergency Wrinkle-Release Spray

He doesn’t directly say ‘I miss you’ but you hear it in his words anyway.

When he complains about the hotel’s mattress and how it’s “nothing compared to our bed at home” you know that he feels your absence.

“The food here makes me want to gag, all I want is your tempura”

“My skin feels so raw from the scratchy towels; the towels you bought us feel much softer.”

“Babe, how’d you manage to make all my stuff fit in my luggage? I can’t pack it the way you do.”

Sakusa most likely won’t blow up your phone, but he always makes sure to send you a good morning and good night text

He doesn’t buy you flowers, but when he gets home, he hands you a large bag without saying anything.

“What’s all this?” you grunt, cause damn that bag was heavy.

But Sakusa was shrugged. “Souvenirs. I thought you’d like them.”

And you squeal in excitement, pulling him to sit down on the same couch that he’s been thinking of for weeks, a smile on his face as he watches you sift through all the little knick knacks and presents that reminded him of you.

Hinata

EXCITED BOY

He’s constantly texting you and checking in, even when he doesn’t have to

☀️Shoyo☀️(6:58am): We just got to the gym where they’re letting us practice!

☀️Shoyo☀️(7:01am): I’m about to go into the locker room and change now

☀️Shoyo☀️(7:05am): Whoops I think I made the wrong turn.

☀️Shoyo☀️(7:07am): Whoa, this gym is pretty big; I wonder what other sports they could use it for?

☀️Shoyo☀️(7:15am): Wait, I can’t find my way back

☀️Shoyo☀️(7:30am): Babe, help

He doesn’t facetime you like Bokuto, but he is blowing up your phone just the same.

He misses you of course, that’s a given, but to be honest he mostly does it because he doesn’t want YOU to miss HIM.

Maybe that’s the wrong way to put it; he wants you to miss him but he doesn’t want to ever make you feel lonely.

He knows that feeling so well :( he never wants to be the cause of your loneliness. And if he had to pick between being a persistent man or an aloof man, then Hinata will choose persistence five hundred times over.

Hinata has an incredible talent of being able to make you smile and laugh, even if it’s simply through a screen, from hundreds of miles away.

Even though his career and ever-changing schedule can make things a little extra challenging, when you see him play on TV, watch as the crowd cheers and hollers for Hinata, listen to the way the commentators describe his insane plays, and you realize you don’t mind having to share Hinata with the world

Because when he stares directly into the camera and smiling while he holds both hands over his heart, you know this gesture was meant only for you.

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musewritingsforyou · 2 years ago

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Asked and Answered

You ask, and I have such a long answer!!!!!

Welcome to part one of a two-part fic all about anxiety and panic. I would like to make the disclaimer that this is purely based off of my own experience and in no way should reflect what other people do in those situations.

part two coming tomorrow!!

tw: anxiety, OCD, Panic, past relationship abuse (very briefly mention and very vague, no physical violence), medication

4.3k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 1

We had only been in LA for a couple of days so far, the beginning of two weeks there for a few shows and a little bit of “time off” where the boys were having some meetings with the label and management while they were in the area. All of the boys have apartments in LA that they bought a while back when their management and label signed to be in LA, so, while we were here we all were back at our own apartments instead of in hotels by a venue. It was sort of nice to be at “home” for a little while, even if the apartment Harry and I were sharing in LA was not nearly as homely as the one in New York or our house in London. After two days of being in the house and going out or ordering in for all of our meals, I decided it was probably high time to get some actual groceries for the fridge so that we could cook something, or even just have a snack because there was not a single morsel of food in the apartment. I had gone out by myself to do the shopping, leaving Harry at home doing god knows what because we both did not feel like being mobbed getting groceries today.

While I was deliberating over the avocados I felt my phone buzz in my pocket and I slid it out to check who had texted me. I had expected it to be Harry adding something to the list, or maybe one of the boys asking if they could come for dinner, but what I found was a name I hadn’t seen or thought of in about five years. I was lucky his number hadn’t been changed because it was still in my contacts from the last time I saw him. A picture of my Ex with his dog beside him made me freeze when I realized it was real. Five years of nothing, no phone calls, no visits, no texts, no emails, no cards. He sent me a single check for a thousand dollars after leaving me with only a note left behind: for that plane ticket you got.

Keep reading

Of course, I had gotten over him. I went to therapy and did the work I needed and then I found Harry and eventually I forgot all of the terrible things that I went through when I was with him. I took a deep breath and threw the two avocados that I had my hands on into a produce bag without thinking about it. I shut my phone off and turned off the ringer, deciding that now was not the time to force myself to look at whatever the hell excuse he had texted me. I moved through the store getting the rest of the items on my list, moving as fast as I could in anticipation of the text, and nervousness to get back to Harry so I could ask him what he thinks about the situation. After I checked out and brought all of the groceries to the back of Harry's black SUV I moved to the driver's seat and sat there for a moment with my hands on the wheel in silence until I brought out my phone. I opened the text without hesitation and saw the barely three-sentence message that I had been panicking about for the past forty-five minutes.

Heard from your mother that you were in town, sorry for not reaching out earlier. Would love to go out for lunch tomorrow if you have the time. I should explain.

No explanation, no apology, no personal message or nickname. From the absolute lack of care or emotion in it, I would not be surprised to find out that he had told an assistant to send me something while he was running out the door to some corporate meeting. Don’t know why I expected anything different from him. I opened a text to my mother who had apparently divulged my location to the man in the first place.

y/n: Care to explain why y/e/n knows I’m in LA?

Mom: Whoops, forgot to text you about that, he heard the band was performing and wasn’t sure it was you, I merely confirmed what he already suspected.

I sighed and placed my phone on the seat beside me. No use in being mad at anyone for this, it was bound to happen eventually anyway, besides I might as well get it over with. Most likely what will happen is I’ll go to the lunch and if he decides to grace me with his presence at all, he’ll get a salad, ask polite questions, make a few misogynist jokes, pay the bill and I won’t speak to him again for another five years.

y/n: tomorrow sounds fine, I know a lunch place in midtown, I can text you the address. If you give me a time I can make the reservation.

Ex: glad you got back to me, one would be perfect for me

This time when I started the car I didn't even bother to play any music for the drive. Not like I would be able to enjoy it or sing along with all the questions now swimming in my head. Even with LA traffic the drive back to Harry and I’s apartment didn’t take much time, I had worried before that anything frozen I got would melt from the mixture of the hot LA sun and the horrible traffic that never seems to let up. When I parked the car in the garage and went to inspect the Ben and Jerrys from a bag in the trunk I was pleased to find that it was still solid in all of its glory. Usually, I would have gone in and requested Harry's help bringing things in from the car, but there were only a few bags, none of which were all that heavy. With two bags on each arm and one in my hand, I managed to walk in the door and set all of the bags on the kitchen table without too much trouble. Upon hearing the sound of the door closing behind me and the rustling of the grocery bags on the counter Harry called out my name from the couch.

“Hey baby, how was shopping” He was writing an email with his computer on his lap but reached out behind the couch to grab mine. I gave it to him and ran my hand through his hair for a second before walking back to the counter to unload all of the groceries.

“oh, it was fine. y/e/n texted me while I was there, he wanted to meet me for lunch tomorrow.” I dropped the information causally while opening and closing the cupboards in the kitchen. I must have done it well, too, because it took Harry almost a full minute to practically slam the lid of his computer down and turn 180 on the couch so that he was facing me.

“he did what?” I shrugged, avoiding eye contact and placing the bananas in a bowl on the edge of the counter.

“asked me to go for lunch with him tomorrow. Said he wanted to ‘explain’��

“and what did you say?”

“I told him yes.” He was quiet for a moment before he placed his computer on the couch cushion next to him and rose from the dark grey square he was sitting on, sauntering over to me and standing directly behind me, trapping me against the counter. What I expected to be a look of jealousy or anger was nothing but a calm and worried stare. Once my belly was pressed into the white granite of the kitchen island he came even closer and wrapped his arms around my middle, arching his back slightly to place his head on my shoulder right at the crook of my neck. I took both of my hands and placed them over his crossed arms around my stomach, not trying to pry him off, but just resting them there for some show of what he was doing. He kissed my neck once tenderly before moving his head up to be resting on top of my own.

“are you sure that’s a good idea?” I knew what he was talking about but a part of me felt like playing the long game.

“what do you mean?” He was patient and still while he responded, not a hint of annoyance at my unwillingness to get to the point of the matter.

“going to lunch with him, are you sure that’s a good idea, especially after what happened the last few times you saw him.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” He groaned by my head and flipped me around so that his arms were still around me, but now my back was pressed against the island and my hands were resting on his forearms.

“y/n/n… at least let me come with you.” I shook my head adamantly and tightened my grip on his arms.

“no. no, this is something I need to do by myself. I need to show him that I’m not some weak little girl he can push around anymore.” Harry brushed a stray bit of hair from my face and tilted his head down so that he could look me in the eye.

“baby, you don’t need to prove anything to him. If anything he is the one that should be proving something to you. He practically pushed you into a nervous breakdown love, just after-“

“I don’t want to talk about that.” I wrenched myself out of his arms when I started to feel myself getting shaky and nervous at the mere mention of what had happened the last time I was near that man. Normally I can talk about anything with Harry. He makes me feel safe and loved, and he has never once pushed me past what he knows I feel uncomfortable with. He waits and pays attention until he knows that I can talk about something without it being scary or nerve-wracking. But this was the one thing. This was just something I didn’t talk about, hell I tried not to even think about it after it was finished. I stormed off into our bedroom knowing that he wasn’t far behind. The second I got there I couldn’t help but think about the event Harry had unknowingly brought up. I had told him once in passing what had happened that day, but I never really explained how much of an impact it had on me. I crumbled on the floor just in front of the bed and slid until my head was in my hands which were resting on my bent knees pointing towards the sky. Tears started to fall down my face and dribble all the way to my crooked elbows. I could faintly hear the distant sound of Harry's footfalls coming up the stairs and down the hallway to our room, but I was too lost to the world now to think about what that meant or do anything to change how I looked or felt. Our oak door creaked as he pushed it open, I hadn’t even latched the door closed when I came in so quickly and fell to the floor. He took one hesitant step into the room and then stopped.

“I’m sorry” he whispered, sounding guilty, it wasn’t really his fault, I think he just wasn’t sure what happened. In Harry's mind, any time anyone cries near him or in front of him, it’s worth an apology. Maybe not one on his behalf, but on behalf of whoever hurt them.

“it wasn’t you.” I sniffled out and kept my head in my hands, nervously running my hands through my hair in an effort to keep my frantic fidgeting at bay. He took a few more steps into the room and then slid down onto the floor next to me, careful not to touch me just in case it would make things worse.

“Do you need me to do something?” I shook my head and tried to focus on the movements I could do, tapping my leg, cracking my knuckles, running my hand through my hair. Any little movement that I could do without actually standing up to move and alarming Harry was what I was doing.

“Can I give you a hug?” I shook my head again. I tried not to feel bad about it, I’m sure he knew and understood why I couldn’t have a hug right now, but still, I felt a little bad for rejecting something I normally craved so much. When I’m panicking within myself so much like this, trapped within a flood of thoughts and emotions in my own mind, the feeling and even the thought of being physically trapped in someone's arms is nauseating.

“Do you want to try taking a walk?” He had started to notice how I was not just shaking with nerves but shaking with a need, an intent.

“no. Maybe. I don’t know” There were so many things happening in my brain all at once that I couldn’t figure out what to address first. All of the questions he proposed just added to the clutter and confusion even though he meant to help. He stopped asking me questions and just sat next to me for a minute. At first, I appreciated the silence he was giving me. It made my brain feel a little less cluttered like I had more room to figure out what thought to focus on first. That didn’t last long though. After a few minutes of scouring my thoughts to find something to start with, my own brain became a battle zone of crossing wires and half-finished arguments with myself that will never even come to fruition. My breathing picked up, as did my fidgeting. I was practically vibrating from all of my little movements and hyperventilation. I could feel the veins in my neck start to stand out from the strain of breathing, my head was pounding and the only sound I could hear was the rushing of blood in my ears.

“y/n/n?” He turned to face me dead on when he saw my chest rising and falling faster than I could control. I was so deep in my own mind and lost in the sound of the blood rushing to my head that I didn’t hear or respond to him. He moved, still being careful not to touch me, so that he was facing me, kneeling on the carpet half a foot in front of me. He could see my skin begin to get paler and paler with the lack of oxygen staying in my body.

“y/n you need to breathe” it went on like that for a minute. He pleaded with me to calm down, tried to count with me, name the things around us, played music, sang to me, anything he could think of to get me to even out my breaths in the hope that eventually I would calm myself down and tire myself out enough to fall asleep. But none of it worked. Half of the things he said didn’t even reach me because of how loud it was inside of my own brain, the other half just were slightly depressing attempts at distracting me for long enough to figure something else out. Finally, he gave up the natural tries.

“I really don’t want you to pass out so I’m going to go get the meds baby.” I couldn’t speak enough to protest so I figured he must be right. I hated being medicated, but I think I would hate passing out in front of him even more, so the lesser of two evils I suppose. He got up and walked calmly to the door, but the second he was out into the hall I could hear his footsteps become more frantic. Less than two minutes later I heard his feet on the floor again as he rushed back into the room. Again I heard his feet slow the second he got into the room, not wanting to scare me any more than I already was. He kneeled a little closer to me this time, holding a small pill and a glass of water in his large hands.

“Do you need help taking it?” I shook my head and held out a hand. He dropped the small white pill into my palm first, waiting for me to toss it into the back of my mouth before handing me the glass of cold water that I took a swig from. Once the pill was down and the glass of water had been drained I timidly held out a shaky hand while I waited for the medicine to take effect. Harry looked down at my shaking hand for a moment before taking it in his own and kissing it. He didn’t say anything, but continued to hold my hand in his much larger one until about ten minutes went by and I gave his hand three strong squeezes.

“you good? Is it working?” I nodded

“yeah. Yeah, it's definitely moving along” He let go of my hand in order to stand, and then once he was standing he handed me a pair of shorts and his t-shirt from his side of the bed. My hands were still a little shaky and the drug had almost taken full effect so he helped me slide my jeans and sweater off and then slide his giant shirt over my head and shoulders. Once I was dressed he held out both of his hands for me to take.

“mmm, nope, think you’ll need to carry me.” I mumbled sleepily and looked up at him with a sheepish smile.

“really? Worked that quick? All right then.” He crouched down to take me into his arms and did so with little effort. I slung my hands around the back of his neck and tried not to go completely limp in his arms. That was the thing I hated about the medication so much. Although it certainly calms me down enough to make the panic attack stop, it also means that it shuts down my body and brain in the process. He carefully lowered me onto the bed and helped me slide myself under our blankets. He took my glasses off of my head and folded them, placing them on the bedside table to my right. As he was about to walk away I grabbed his hand.

“don’t go. Please.” He smiled down at me and gave my hand a few squeezes.

“not going anywhere baby, I promise.” I reluctantly let go of his hand and he stripped himself of his remaining clothes before climbing into the bed beside me in only his boxers. Once we were side by side in the bed he pulled me into him so that I was nuzzled into his chest with his arms wrapped all the way around me.

“he really fucked me up, huh.” He gave an airy laugh into my head that was sadder than anything else.

“eh, maybe a little. Are you going to tell me why?” I waited a minute and listened to his heartbeat under my head, considering my options before spilling all my tales of woe. I could just stay silent, close my eyes and pretend that I had fallen asleep. Or I could change the subject ask him what he did today, but I doubt he would fall for that one. Or I suppose I could just tell him the truth. Maybe that was just the medication talking but for some reason that seemed like the decision I was leaning towards.

“Soph?”

“hmm?” I hummed into his chest, still considering my options carefully.

“are you going to tell me what happened with him?” I sighed. The third option it is.

“yeah, yeah, just don’t know where to start really. I guess it started when we first got together, I just never noticed how sad I was until he left. I guess a part of me always knew that what he was doing wasn't right, I just couldn't do anything about it. Until I started talking with y/bff/n again and realized how much of an idiot I had been to let him convince me that everything he did was my fault. I held some weird reverence for him even when he let me down time after time.” Harry started to run a hand through my hair. I felt weirdly distant from the story that at any other moment would have sent me spiraling into a panic attack, the joys of antidepressants I suppose.

“once I realized how fucked up it all was I tried to confront him about it. Not just him and how horrible he was, how much pain he caused me, but just how this one person managed to create some irreparable rift inside myself to the point where I was practically doing his work for him. When I decided to leave him I hadn't told anyone.Not that I didn't want to, just that I felt it had to be my decision, I had to be the one to leave, to take something from him for once. The first thing he did was refuse to leave. He said that I was being too tough and that he would never do things like that. I tried to explain how I had been feeling, I thought that maybe the part of him I had fallen in love with so long ago would understand. And then suddenly I couldn't breathe. Not because he had touched me but because he had gotten so, so close to it. I don't know what stopped him that night but I didn't care. Eventually he put his hand back down to his side. He slept on the couch but I was so shocked I didn't even think to call the police, or my mom, or anyone, I just went to bed. The next morning was strangely calm, I spent as little time with him as I possibly could, and then just before he left he started talking some shit in the kitchen within earshot of me and I sort of lost it.” He stayed quiet through my story, every once in a while moving his large hands to rub some other part of me, but just staying calm and still like he was afraid any movement would scare me off.

“I don’t remember everything that was said, but I do remember that I was crying, my hands were shaking, he was laughing at me, I called him an asshole to his face about three times, by the end of it I was shaking with what I thought at first was rage. But it wasn’t.” He spoke for the first time,

“it was a panic attack.” I nodded into his warm chest and took a deep breath to remind myself that I could.

“yeah. It wasn’t my first ever, but I hadn’t really thought it was in issue yet. So basically he ended up causing me to go into a manic state that I had no one to help me with and then he left. We didn’t talk again except for that note he left in the kitchen. Not until a few months later. He showed up at my college graduation which I was terrified of as it was, and effectively told me that it was my fault he left. I blamed myself for all of that anyway so him telling me that in my mind just solidified it.”

“you know that wasn’t-“

“I know, I know, but I was young and terrified and upset. I was dealing with OCD and Anxiety, and ADHD all on my own without anyone to help me, I was newly on my own, I didn’t have a boyfriend, I had maybe one or two close friends, I was barely speaking to my family, so I believed him because I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Then why would you go tomorrow? Why would you put yourself through that pain? When he has already hurt you just from the memory?” He was trying very hard not to sound upset, I could tell, but his words showed it anyways. I took a hand and stroked his arm while I explained to him.

“ I need to prove to myself that I’m not that person anymore. I need to show him that he’s in the wrong, or maybe make some peace with what happened.” He was quiet for another moment until he took my hand in his.

“Then at least let me come with you.”

“No. This is something I have to do by myself. I love you and I am so happy that I have someone like you to support me like this, but I need to learn how to be strong for myself sometimes. Besides, I made the lunch close enough to soundcheck that if anything happens I can just make the excuse that I need to get to work and I can leave and go straight to you.”

“I'm just worried.”

“I know. So am I. But I promise I will keep my phone on and I will text you every chance I get and then when I leave I will go straight to sound check so I can see you and the boys. I’ll be okay.”

“you promise?”

“promise” We were both silent for a few more minutes until my breathing evened out and slowed, my eyes closing from the toll of a panic attack and heavy medication. As I started to fall asleep with his heartbeat in my ears and my arms wrapped around him I heard his sleepy voice murmur in my ear.

“I love you.”

#harry styles #harry styles comfort #harry styles imagines #one direction #onedirectiontour #oneshot

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anyoneseenadam · 4 years ago

Note

azriel x reader mates

slow dancing plzz that would be so cute

Pairing: azriel x reader (acotar)

Warnings: mentions of scars but asides from that just pure studio ghibli inspired fluff

A/n: I had this idea agessss ago and then forgot abt it but this anon reminded me!! I used Home!Az for this but you don’t need to read the series to understand it I don’t think, it’s just for world building and stuff. I’m also linking the song I imagined for it :)) hope you enjoy!!!! (Also I’m too tired to proof read so sorry if it’s shit)

——————————————————————————

You woke up to Azriel pressing kisses into your neck, his hands softly trailing along your body, so gently as if you were made of glass. You had been with him for almost a year now, the rings glinting on your hands when they caught the light, and the scars on your back no longer a weight. Instead something you showed freely, as a symbol of your strength.

You cracked open an eye and watch as Azriel lifted his head with a soft smile, a scarred hand coming to caress your face.

“Happy birthday flower,” he whispered and you giggled, kissing him deeply, no longer surprised at how easily the smile came onto your face.

“Mmm morning handsome,” you said, pushing up on your forearms as Az arranged the pillows behind you for you to lean against. He settled beside you before passing you a steaming mug of black coffee, picking up his own as he kissed your shoulder, the tip of one of the scars, your neck, cheek, and then finally mouth. He wrapped an arm around your shoulder and you snuggled into his side, sipping your coffee and sighing in content at the taste.

“Why are you up so early?” You asked, head tilting to look at him, swathed in shadows and with the light stubble you had come to find out grew back pretty much every third day. He ran a hand over his chin before answering.

“Had a couple things to prepare,”

“What are you preparing for?” You asked and he looked at you, horrified.

“Your birthday of course,”

“Oh yeah, whoops,”

“How did you already forget?” He asked frowning slightly, this was the first birthday he got to celebrate with you and he was determined to make it special but you didn’t seem to fully remember it was a celebration.

“It’s like 8am leave me alone,” you elbowed him in the stomach and he laughed.

“Actually it’s half seven but I’m on strict orders to have you at the town house by eight,” you frowned and he kissed you gently, taking your mug from your hands and putting it on the bedside table.

“But that gives me at least twenty minutes to make you fall apart.” He smirked wolfishly as he settled between your legs.

—

It was half eight by the time you arrived at the town house, legs slightly aching and Azriel smug as a thief.

After a slight telling off from Rhys, filled with warm expressions and then a five minute hug from Cassian followed by a ten minute hug from Mor, you were sat around the table. The plates in the middle were filled with pancakes and fruit, mugs of steaming coffee and glasses of fresh juice. There were flowers in the middle of the table and blue and gold balloons designed in an arch. You had cried when you saw it and had another long hug, this one from Feyre, Azriel and Rhys dragging you apart.

After you had eaten, head already slightly lighter from the champagne Mor had lovingly filled your glass with, you sat around the living room as you opened your presents.

You cried much more than you probably should have, overly emotional because of the kind family you had found.

Feyre had gifted you a long, sage green dress that you swore you recognised, she winked at Azriel as you opened it and you furrowed your eyebrows, wondering what they were up too.

You were given books, weapons, expensive jewellery from Amren (who decided you needed more than the crystals you kept around your neck) and enough drink to last you a lifetime, or maybe a week or two from the way Cassian was eyeing it up.

When you were finished opening your presents, none from Azriel who had sparkling eyes as he watched you, his family as in love with you as he was.

“I’m presuming you two are heading off now, what time will you be back do you think?” Rhys asked, waving his hand to dispose of the wrapping paper that was piled around you.

“We are?” You turned to face Azriel and he grinned at you.

“We are, but we’ve to get changed first. You should wear that dress,” he nodded to the green one in your lap and you smiled at Feyre.

“That’s a good idea, am I getting told where we’re going?” You asked and he just shook his head, standing as you laughed and went to hug your friends goodbye.

“We’ll probably be back around 7.” Azriel told Rhys.

“Okay well enjoy!” You finished hugging Nesta as Azriel wrapped an arm around your waist, winnowing you back to your home.

“Go get changed, you won’t need a jacket, I’ll meet you gear in half an hour,” he kissed you lightly before shoving you off in the direction of your room gently, and you giggled, excited to find out what he was planning.

—

Thirty minutes later you were stood in your new dress, your hair down and some simple brown pumps on. You saw Azriel walk towards you, holding a picnic basket in one hand as you gaped at him.

“You look so good, holy fuck!” You exclaimed, he was wearing his usual black trousers but had a loose, white shirt tucked into them, and upon further inspection an earring with a dangling emerald hanging from one ear, his face freshly shaven. “Since when have you had your ears pierced?” You asked and he laughed.

“Since yesterday, never trust Cassian with delicate things,” he joked and you furrowed your eyebrows, still confused what he was doing. “Have you got your phone?” He asked and you nodded, your phone, speaker and Polaroid camera tucked carefully into a bag you had slung over your shoulder.

“Perfect, let’s go,” he grabbed your hand and before you could ask where he was taking you he had winnowed the two of you away.

You took in your surroundings, tears forming in your eyes as you realised what was going on.

You were stood in a green pasture, the sun whinging brightly above you, a stream flowing past you and the ground completely covered in flowers. You turned to Azriel as you took in his outfit.

“I do listen when we watch movies,” he said as you let out a choked sob, “Now (y/n), may I have this dance,” he held out his hand as he took your phone from his bag, playing the theme from howls moving castle as you nodded, taking his hand as it came through the speaker you had brought.

He kept his wings flared behind him as he twirled you around, the dance fast but intimate, you felt like you were flying as he twirled you around, your dress floating in the breeze as he spun you gently. He lifted you above him at one point as you moved together, watching you with so much love before dipping you as the song ended, kissing you deeply.

When the song ended he wrapped his arms around your waist as your linked around his neck, swaying you slowly to the song. You could feel his heart beat against your own chest, interlinking you fingers and allowing the flowers that were surrounding you to grow and bloom.

“Thank you,” you whispered against his mouth as he grinned, kissing you gently.

“Happy birthday baby,”

He stepped back to the picnic basket and lay out the blanket and food, helping you sit down as you leaned against him, taking a Polaroid of the two of you and hiding it in the basket to let it develop while Azriel stared in wonder at the technology.

“Let me give you your presents.” He said in between feeding you chocolate strawberries and you turned to him with wide eyes.

“There’s more?!”

“Of course baby, gotta treat my best girl,” he pulled a selection of neatly wrapped boxes from another bad he had brought and you smiled as you bit into a bit of baklava.

You opened a set of of deep blue lingerie first, gasping at the intricate material and looking up to see him watching you with a devilish smirk. The you found a collection of books from his world he thought you would love, more candles and crystals.

The final box wasn’t wrapped like the rest however, instead it was a plain cardboard box that said ‘from pepper’ in black writing on the top and you gasped.

“You didn’t!” Your eyes were wide as he laughed.

“Open it!” He demanded and you felt your heart pound as you carefully opened the box, pulling out another glass box which contained Tony Starks arc reactor, the words “proof that Tony stark has a heart” engraved in as your eyes watered.

“I had it made after we finished endgame,” he explained as you leapt on him, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Thank you, for everything,” you whispered into his neck and he kissed your head. Holding you tightly for the rest of the afternoon, red wine flavoured kisses on sun kissed skin. The two of you lay in each other’s arms, Azriel taking you apart slowly under the sun, then flying you over the hills as you squealed, gripping close to him as he dipped and twirled.

When it was finally time to retire for the day he held you closely, the picnic basket clutched in one hand as you balanced your gifts in your arms, kissing you deeply and winnowing the two of you home. You placed your gifts down gently on the bed as he wrapped his arms around your waist, his chin resting gently upon your shoulder as he kissed your neck. You turned in his arms, facing him and kissed him again.

“I love you, more than anything,” you whispered against his mouth.

“I love you more,” you giggled at him as you pulled away, ready to spent the night with your new family, your beloved mate holding you close.

#acofas #acomaf #acotar #azriel #azriel x reader #acowar #acofs #acosf #rhysand

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sambvcks · 4 years ago

Text

redefined, b.b. x reader

summary: just because those ten words no longer wreak havoc on his mind does not mean they are gone. just redefined.

warnings: mentions of food, blood, gunshot wound

word count: 3.7k....whoops

author’s note: first standalone! i’m also itching to work on a sam story next. the last episode still lives in my mind rent free and this is a reworking of that which diverges from civil war and we get one big happy avenging family that aren’t dead :)

[ read on ao3 | masterlist | inbox | join my taglist! ]

Longing

An Avenger.

The concept was still so foreign to Bucky, despite dozens of successful missions under his belt and a permanent residence in the tower. Still, every morning he sprung up in bed expecting to still be in some run-down apartment halfway across the world, on the run.

Instead, he would awake on a plush mattress that offered little back support. He would shuck on the first shirt his bleary eyes could see and pad into the hallway, the smell of fresh coffee overtaking his superhuman sense of smell. You would be perched at the kitchen counter, pouring over mission files stained with coffee rings that Tony would later complain about.

Steve and Sam would have already come through on their way to their morning run, the coffee pot running dangerously low. You’d already placed his favorite mug nearby, two packets of sugar emptied into the bottom. A routine.

Bucky didn’t think he’d ever have a routine again.

His hand would press against your shoulder in a familiar greeting as he passed, you’d grin up at him with sleepy eyes and a lazy smile before returning to your work. Your cereal sat forgotten beside you, the overly sweetened kid’s choice growing soggy.

It was a silent and comfortable interaction. Neither worked to fill the quiet or felt the need to. Even with Steve, there was always talking and planning and ‘what about this’. With you, it was so natural to just exist how he was in that moment. No excuses, no whispered apologies.

He pushed his back against the sink as he sipped at his coffee, eyes immediately settling on your distracted figure. Your pajamas were wrinkled, mouth formed into a perfect concentrated from as you hunched uncomfortably, hand scribbling furiously. He swallowed and decided you were the most beautiful person he had ever seen, especially with your coffee breath and fingernails chewed to nubs.

He wanted so desperately to move across the kitchen and press himself perfectly against you, to push aside your paperwork and demand your sole attention. His hand clenched into a fist as he longed to feel your soft, round cheeks in his hands, how warm you would feel against the cool metal of his left and how you’d nuzzle closer still.

He hadn’t heard the dragging footsteps of Steve and Sam returning from their run and didn’t even notice them until they were settled at the doorway, watching him watch you.

“Morning.” Steve grinned, all knowing. Bucky cleared his throat and refocused on his mug.

“Morning.” Bucky replied with a look that said ‘don’t say anything’.

Rusted

Bucky learned that if you weren’t cooped up in your room or camped out on the kitchen island, you were tucked away in Tony’s garage. On slow days where it seemed everyone was off in their own little world, Bucky would know to find you under the hood of one of Tony’s vintage cars, each kept in pristine condition, but you claimed that ‘there’s always something to work on’.

Bucky was never a car guy. His family was too poor to even think of ever owning his own car. He didn’t even have his own license and technically couldn’t legally ride his bike either. He found out quickly that being an Avenger meant the term legal could be bent a bit. So, he wasn’t a car guy. But the sight of you with streaks of grease across your face and your raggedy workshop clothes would have him buying one just to see you work on it.

You were notoriously protective of your little hideaway, the music loud and the sound of metal ringing as you fixed and fiddled with every little thing. Steve nearly got a wrench to the face when he tried to distract you from Tony’s antique Chevy.

Bucky was different, though. He was always different.

He would sit himself on a tall stool positioned next to one of Tony’s many rolling tool chests. You’d call out a tool and he’d rifle through the collection until he found what he thought was the right one and only slightly tease him when he’d emerge with the wrong one. Typically, you’d spend these afternoons in silence, the thumping of the heavy base of whatever crazy metal album you picked the only soundtrack to your work.

Sometimes, though, you’d play gentle rock music. Bucky would ask questions on what you were doing, how you learned to do all of this, why you did it when Tony worked on these cars enough for the both of you.

You’d fish your rag from your pocket, concentrating on scrubbing the grease from under your fingernails as you answered.

“I like using my hands. I like fixing things. For every car that Tony has in this garage, there are hundreds just like it sitting in junkyards gathering cobwebs and rust.” You looked up at him from under eyelashes and Bucky knew you were speaking about much more than just hunks of metal. “They’re worthy of love and care.”

You were talking about him, too.

Seventeen

Bucky didn’t think this superhero business would have so many parties. There seemed to be a celebration for everything. Galas, fundraisers, full on parades whenever Tony happened to wake up in a good mood.

At least this one is a holiday, he thought to himself as he nursed his third beer of the hour. Not that it did anything other than keep his hands occupied.

The year was coming to a close, and the top floor of the Avengers Tower was decked in golden confetti and banners to ensure no one forgot. The music was obnoxiously loud, and the lyrics made little sense, but everyone seemed to be having a good time mingling and even venturing to the dance floor.

No matter how many times Sam tried to drag him in with an invisible rope, Bucky was not going to dance. Well. Maybe he would if you asked.

The party had been in full swing for hours now, with only ten minutes until the ball a few blocks up finally dropped and he could sneak away to his room without a teasing ‘bedtime already, old timer?’ from Nat.

Still, the party raged on and he eyed the glass door to the balcony. He downed the last of his beer, brushing past enthusiastic partygoers with his shoulders hunched forward in some attempt to minimize the space he took up in the room that only seemed to be getting smaller. He caught Steve’s eye on the way out and plastered on a smile in response to his disappointed look.

He let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding as soon as the glass door slid closed behind him. His eyes closed as he leaned back against it, the chill of the December New York air blew his hair in every direction.

“Fancy meeting you here.” You were sat in the far corner, so well hidden he hadn’t even noticed you, though he had been on the lookout for you all night. “Tired of the festivities?”

“And Tony’s music.” He grumbled as he fell into the seat beside you.

“Been waiting for you for the past thirty minutes. Honestly, you made it a lot longer than I could’ve in there.”

You were waiting for him. You wanted him to be there, with you, tucked away from everyone else’s prying eyes. He wanted that, too. Sometimes he wanted it so much it scared him.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, doll. It’s not polite for a gentleman to make a girl wait.”

“Hmm, I think I’ll find it in myself to forgive you.” Your shoulder pressed against his, eyes focused on the smattering of buildings surrounding you. Identical parties were happening in each of them, you were sure. “Can you believe another year is gone?”

“I can’t believe I’m about to make it to 2017 and my back hasn’t given out yet.”

You laughed, loud and unabashedly in a way only Bucky could make you laugh. Head thrown back and eyes glittering from the city lights, Bucky wanted to spend every new year you would allow him to by your side, trying his best to make you laugh again.

“Well,” You stood to peer over the glass railing, Bucky close behind you. You could hear the drunken cries inside as the countdown begun. “I’m glad you did.”

“Me too.” Bucky offered his hand to you. You took it easily.

5, 4, 3…

He wanted nothing more than to pull you close, to finally press a kiss on the lips that had thrown teasing remarks at him during missions. To once and for all end this little dance you both loved so much. But you looked so perfect.

Bucky wasn’t ready to ruin that perfection with everything wrong with him quite yet.

“Happy 2017, Bucky.” You whispered as the fireworks started, but Bucky couldn’t pull his eyes from you.

“Happy 2017, doll.”

Daybreak

The mission had been long and grueling. The week-long stakeout turned into two and quickly turned into a month away. You can’t remember the last time you’d had a good night of sleep that wasn’t interrupted with Bucky’s hand on your shoulder, telling you it was your turn to keep watch.

It wasn’t a horrible mission, more of an exercise in patience and restraint than anything. Bucky’s stories kept you entertained enough, and he was a good partner. Which is why you were paired together more often than not.

Still, it was nice to finally collapse into your familiar bed, not even bothering to kick of shoes or take a much-needed shower. Your sleeping schedule was all out of whack and you tossed and turned, despite the exhaustion seeping through your bones.

After fifteen minutes, you finally huffed a sigh of defeat and stumbled back to your feet. You showered, which was a few good days overdue, and dressed in your largest, most comfortable pajamas.

You weren’t surprised to see Bucky up as well, sitting at the dining table with a mug of fresh coffee.

“Couldn’t sleep?” His foot kicked out the seat beside him as an invitation.

“Sleeps overrated, anyways.” You shrugged, slumping into the seat and pressing your face into the cool glass of the table.

“Sleep is good for you.” He insisted, reaching forward to brush aside the hair that had curtained over your face. “You deserve a good night’s rest.”

“So do you, Buck.”

He stayed silent for a while, just sipping at his coffee and stealing glances at you, face trained out the floor to ceiling windows. He really didn’t know what he deserved, anymore. Sure, he had made some semblance of peace with what the Winter Soldier had done with his body. He was better, that was certain.

Worthy of you and all your unwavering sweetness? He wasn’t so sure.

You idly chatted about nothing for hours, filling comfortable silence with talks of the mission and the food poisoning he had given you when he tried to make dinner two weeks in. You sat side by side until day broke the next morning, eyes squinting at the sun peeking over skyscrapers and finally finding the need to fall shut in rest.

“I guess I should say ‘good morning’ instead of ‘good night’.” You were the first to stand, shuffling towards the hallway that led to your bedroom.

“Good morning.” He answered as you padded away, deciding he would be just fine losing sleep every night if it meant he could watch the sunrise by your side.

Furnace

“Doesn’t Tony make enough money to keep this place at least habitable?” You grumbled as you fell into the couch beside Bucky.

“I’m fine.”

Bucky sat in his patent jeans and t-shirt, unphased by the temperature that practically had your teeth chattering. You were bundled in multiple layers, including one of the many sweatshirts he’d wear jogging on cold mornings and blankets you had stolen off his bed. Your glare from under your cocoon of warmth rivaled even his.

“I’m not a muscle-y super soldier-”

“You think I’m muscle-y?”

“-that runs so hot you’re basically a personal furnace.”

“Oh, so now I’m hot.”

“I would strangle you to death right now, but I’m about to lose my fingers to hypothermia.” You burrowed further into your smattering of blankets with a violent chill running down your spine. Bucky simply rolled his eyes and marked the spot in the book he had been reading before you stormed in.

“C’mere.”

He balled up a fistful of one of your blankets, tugging you even closer to him. You opened your arms to allow for direct contact, sighing contently as your face pressed into his shoulder and legs tangled with his. You sighed contently as you welcomed his warmth, shimmying as close as you could get.

“Better?”

“The best.”

Nine

“Do you ever think what your life would be like? If you’d gotten to go home?”

Even a year ago, this question would have turned Bucky into a brooding mess. He would have delved into every little moment he had missed, every plan that had been turned upside down when he fell from that train all those years ago. But he was better now, more contemplative. He wouldn’t drown in the idea of what could have been because he knows what it’s like to be on the other side.

“I like to think I would’ve gone to college.”

“Really?”

“You calling me dumb, doll?”

“No! You’re the smartest person I know. I’m just picturing you at college. Carrying textbooks and wooing all the dames.” You fell into him at the thought, a fake swoon overtaking your face.

“I’d be too busy studying for dames.”

“Studying what?”

“I always liked math. Maybe engineering or something. Wanted to be a teacher before the draft.” He shrugged like the information was no big deal, but to you it was everything.

“Professor Barnes. Kind of sexy.”

“Oh, shut up.” But his words held no malice. Instead, he was grinning that cheeky grin that pulled his cheeks into perfect rosy apples and his eyes crinkled in joy. “I wanted to have ten kids.”

“Ten?!”

“So we’d be a dozen. My own little army of mini-Buckys to take over the world. Couple sets of twins, maybe. Definitely as many girls as I could manage.”

Of course Bucky would be a girl-dad. Playing dress-up for fake tea parties and scaring off boys when they’d come ‘round for first dates. You could imagine how he’d learn how to take care of their hair and plait intricate braids when they asked. He would make breakfast for the whole bunch, kiss his wife goodbye before escorting them to the bus stop and taking off for a day of teaching classes. Bucky would be an amazing father.

An amazing husband, too.

“I think ten may be pushing it, Barnes.”

Bucky pictured it, too. A little more modern than maybe the image you conjured up. Teaching was replaced with small missions. The gaggle of kids were smaller, and he wouldn’t have to kiss his wife goodbye. You’d be in the car next to him, headed to the tower for your morning briefings together.

“I’ll settle for nine.”

Benign

If you were to ask any New Yorker what they think the Avengers do on Friday afternoons, they would probably say something like ‘kicking ass!’. None would get even close to what your actual routine looked like.

None would imagine The Winter Soldier lounging in a bathrobe, hair knotted into a bun at the top of his head as his fellow world-saving Avenger spread some green goop over his face. Chinese takeout boxes littered the living room coffee table, his feet were bubbling in warm foot spa.

“To keep your youthful complexion!” You had promised him. He didn’t comment on the obvious sound of your phone’s camera clicking.

He knew he must have looked completely ridiculous. But as you sunk into the couch next to him with identical spa treatments covering you, he couldn’t find it in himself to really care.

He never thought in a million years that he would have the chance of boring, completely benign afternoons. He thought he would be sidelined to violent missions for the rest of his life, to being thawed out like a microwave meal every time he was deemed useful. Sure, he felt a bit ridiculous when you reached over to adjust the slices of cucumber placed over his eyelids, but he also felt so relaxed.

As you settled even closer to him, head tilting to rest on his shoulder, he would happily take the teasing remarks from Sam when you showed him the pictures.

Homecoming

Peter wasn’t crazy about the idea of getting ready for his senior year homecoming dance at the tower. But Aunt May was upstate on vacation with Happy and he still didn’t know how to tie a tie.

“Oh, you look so handsome, Peter!” You gushed as your fingers worked on his tie. Bucky stood to the side, holding MJ’s corsage in a delicate plastic container. Peter had been careful to find the perfect color, with a little guidance from you. The white dahlias matched perfectly with Peter’s light green tie.

“Thanks, Ms. (Y/L/N).”

Peter, ever the polite kid.

“Be safe, kid. Have her home at a reasonable time and no wandering hands.” Bucky handed over the corsage with a supportive slap to Peter’s shoulder. He was quick to promise that he would follow all the rules before making a dash to the door, just as you were about to ask for pictures.

“Don’t wait up!” He called as the elevator dinged behind him.

“They grow up so fast.” You sniffled. “I didn’t even go to my homecoming dances.”

“Why not?”

“Nobody ever asked me.” You shrugged, collecting the other ties Peter had picked from and hanging them carefully over your arm. Tony didn’t have to know that Peter was taking one of his priceless Versace neckties to a homecoming dance.

“To be fair, I would’ve been scared shitless to ask you to a dance.” Bucky followed close behind. “And I fought a war.”

“That’s sweet, Buck.” You brushed him off as you retreated into Tony’s closet.

“No, really.” His hand caught your elbow. “I would’ve been the luckiest guy in town if I had you on my arm.”

You fell asleep that night imagining you and Bucky twirling around a dance hall without a care in the world.

One

Steve’s hand was firm against your shoulder, his tactical glove soaked and dripping with your blood. Your eyes were unfocused, head lulling every so often when the fight to keep it steady just seemed too difficult. Sam was at your other side, cracking jokes to try to keep your attention on him and not of the literal bullet lodged in your shoulder.

You were escorted from the jet in a flurry, doctor’s hands replacing Steve’s. You barely winced when you were administered painkillers and the ache begun to subside. Before you could blink, you were lifted onto a gurney in the medical bay and the clink of the bullet that had been dug from your flesh rang through the room as it clattered into a metal dish.

Bucky ran in just as the doctor finished maneuvering a long roll of gaze around your shoulder, scheduling a time for you to return to have it cleaned and reapplied again.

“What happened?” He brushed past the doctor without a second glance, eyes trained on your figure pressed against the sterile hospital bed. “Steve said-”

“It’s nothing. Steve likes to be dramatic.”

“-that you were shot!”

“Oh, well. Yeah, that happened.” You moved to sit up, your arm immediately giving out under the weight. Bucky moved even closer to help you, hand careful on your back like you were made of glass. “But just the one time.”

“As far as I’m concerned, one is too many.” He watched the gauze turn darker against your skin; your eyes screwed shut in pain as your knuckles turned white against the sheets. “And you’re never going on a mission without me again.”

Freight Car

“You’re free.”

He remembers those worlds so clearly, it’s like him and Ayo are still sat next to that crackling fire in Wakanda. He thought that had been it. He would never again worry about those ten phrases that erased Bucky Barnes and allowed a machine to emerge from his memory.

As he stole glances of you from the corner of his eye, shadowed by his unruly hair, he knew those words still very much existed in his mind.

They weren’t a means to an end, anymore. He didn’t have to grit his teeth and clench his fists to fight them off. They were new, now. He saw each of those words in you and realized just how important they are now they they’ve found a new meaning.

His love for you came easy.

One second, he was looking at his friend. She was looking back at him and he felt safe.

Your fingers brushed over his shoulder, where flesh turned to metal, and you looked away as though you hadn’t just made him fall in love with you with a single touch.

It took three years for Bucky to make a move. Another party, another escape plan to the balcony where you were waiting for him, like always. The last time you had found yourselves in that position, he had been too unsure. Too wary of what it would mean and if it was too soon.

Now, he didn’t care. He just wanted you and to be selfish and not think about consequences when he leaned forward and finally pressed his lips to yours.

You pulled back, but not far.

Something clicked.

Your love for him hit you like a freight car. Swooping in from nowhere but really, you should have felt the rattling of the tracks beneath your feet. You should have seen all the signs that you loved him and he loved you back. In stolen glances and easy afternoons, in hard missions and bloodshed. He was there, and he looked at you like that. Like everything his body had done was to finally make it to you in this moment.

He waited, patient. He had waited this long, what was another few seconds as the realization washed over your features?

“Oh.” Was your clever whisper.

“Yeah.” Bucky’s hands cradled your face, “Took you long enough.”

taglist: @bibliophilewednesday @teti-menchon0604 @thiswasnevermylifefromtony @spid3rgwen @beautyandthebleh @victoriabaker112213 @orthellqs @phasma-trash

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes/you #bucky barnes/reader #marvel imagine #tfatws imagine #sab writes

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a-tale-of-legends · 3 years ago

Note

kinda new to your blog so sorry if youve already said these, but for the ask game- what are all of your ocs' starters? and do they have nicknames?

Hello!!! I hope you're enjoying your time here on my blog!

_ _ _ _

Jin: Hello! My starter was treecko. She's a Sceptile now, haha. Her name is Vivian.

Kohaku: Oh man, remember when we first got our starters?! Oh that was so long ago....anyway, I chose Torchic -

Jin: Because you wanted to kick my ass back then.

Kohaku: Hey, I had Haru way before you got Vivian! And it's not my fault you lost to me on your first battle-

Jin: I'm only teasing, dear.

Kohaku: Yeah, yeah....anyway! Haru had been my since.... forever! He's a big strong Blaziken now too !

_ _ _ _

Kenji: Oh! Starters? Ooooh hold on, I'll be right back! * Runs off shouting* TATUM!!!

Aiko: I don't have a tradition starter, since I already had Louie, my Azumarill. I've had him since he was an Azurill! Though I think my dad, Professor Elm, was planning to give me a chikorita until someone stole her.

Silver: You said countless of times that you didn't want a starter!

Aiko: True. But I like bugging you, so-

Silver: Oh my god-

Kenji, carrying a Feraligtr: OKAY I'M BACK!* Places the Feraligtr down* Sorry that took a bit. She was sparring with Apple.

Silver: Did you really have to carry here all the way here? You have her PokeBall.

Aiko: Yes. It means my training is working.

Silver: Chucks training.

Aiko: Which he taught to me and I taught to Kenji-

Kenji: ANYWAY! This is Tatum, with bestest girl in the world! * Squishes Tatum's face* Isn't that right girl?

Tatum: *happy noises*

Kenji: Yep! Ummm....who hasn't said anything- oh Beryl! BEEEERRRRRYYLLLLL-

Beryl: Kenji,I'm right here. I've been here the whole time.

Kenji: Oh. Sorry.

Beryl: It's fine. My starter was a cyndaquil by the way. He's a Typhlosion now. Not the hisuian one. His name is Asher.

Kenji: And that's our starters! THANK YOU FOR ASKING!

Aiko: YEAH THANKS!!!

Silver: Why are you two yelling-

_ _ _ _

Danica: .....hey Kiran.

Kiran: Hm?

Danica: What was your starter.

Kiran:......wha? You already know- oh it's an ask.

Danica: Yep.

Kiran: You could have started with that.

Danica: Are you going to answer the question?

Kiran: Alright, fine. My starter was turtwig. He's a Torterra now and his name is Bodhi. There.

Danica: I chose Chimchar. Mostly so Barry wouldn't get her.

Kiran: I doubt that would have done much in terms of Barry's....Barryness.

Danica: Yes, but you love Barry's Barryness.

Kiran: A-and you don't?

Danica: You know exactly what I mean by that.

_ _ _ _

Alexis: Starters? Well * gestures to the Samurott on resting near him* This is Kai. Given to me by professor juniper when we started our journey.

Elliot: Lucky for us, Kai had a twin of her own! *points to the Samurott lazily resting his chin on her lap* This lazy bum is River. I love him dearly.

Eva: My starter was Tepig! Her name is Hazel and she's the best!

Wayne: I never really planned to get a starter, or be a trainer in general. But Clay- I mean, Dad convinced me to get one. I got a snivy! Her name is Lexi and....is it surprising to say she's fully evolved?

Eva: Nah, you're just a cool trainer.

Wayne: Hehe....thanks.

_ _ _ _

Okay so as much as I want to rp the xy protag and sm ones, it gets difficult as I'm doing a nuzlocke of y, so any team building for that is up in the air. However, I made a rule that the starter cannot die . For the SM protags, Ames has a starter, but Poppy is a bit hard for me write now.

Basically, Jude has a Froakie who I'm currently naming Zephyr, Dante is getting a chespin with no nickname right now. Amsonia got a Rowlet who I forgot the name of. Whoops. Poppy is a difficult case given I need to figure out how he fits into my version of sm.

Okay back to the rp!

_ _ _ _

Naomi: O-oh! Hello! Um...oh man I wasn't prepared for this-

Carol: Yo! I chose Grookey! His name is Twigs!

Naomi: M-my starter was Sobble! His name is Neptune....

Carol: Water starters with water based names must run in the family huh?

Naomi: I....I guess so!

_ _ _ _

And that's it!.....okay no. There's Sakura Ume and Zero Yamamoto. Buuuuuuut. I'm lazy lol. Also I haven't played as Zero yet.

I hope this was too your liking. I may have went overboard for such a simple task, but I had fun and I hope you have fun reading it!

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ressjeon · 4 years ago

Text

ghost of you | jhs

pairing: jung hoseok x female reader

summary: he keeps begging you to go, but you insist on staying

genre: childhood best friend!au, angst, slow burn, drama, little bit of fluff

warnings: implied smut (brief affair), swearing, alcohol consumption

word count: 12k (whoops more than planned)

a/n: so this is my very first full fic whew. there’s been last minute changes so I procrastinated but do listen to the song of the same title by 5 Seconds of Summer while reading this :)

and since this is VERY late from his birthday i just decided to submit it to @houseofddaeng’s Happy Hobiuary event this year and i chose a comeback look with my favourite hair colour on him, this was from the Euphoria MV ❤️

Clearing your throat, you got the attention of everyone at the table. Now all eyes on you, you feel your confidence starting to falter. Who fucking cares, this monthly dinner with Hoseok's family is the best time for this.

"Um..so me and Hobi were thinking.." you eyed Hoseok beside you to help you continue explaining what you both have been planning for weeks.

"Y/N and I are thinking of getting a house together" Hoseok smiled back at you and you flushed.

"You wanna live together! Omg my ship is sailing!" Hoseok's sister Jiwoo is squealing while poking your sides. You just glared at her, eyeing her to stop just in case Hoseok catches on.

"N-no, not like that, we'll share a house near our campus" you clarified but the knowing look from your Mom is making you nervous, she can always read you. "Yeah, cause the dorms in uni are separated but we don't want to live apart" Hoseok chimed in cheerfully, putting an arm around your shoulder.

"Well then, of course. Who are we to stop you both" Hoseok's Dad smiled at you both and you felt his Mom's teasing eyes when you nuzzled into Hoseok's side. Your parents have not said anything and you contemplated asking, now anxiously holding Hoseok's hand beside you. His parents looked at yours hopefully and then your Dad finally decided to face you both.

"You both are now adults so do whatever you want" a look of surprise etched up on your face and you resisted to smile broadly, maintaining your cool exterior when you're actually screaming inside of happiness.

You can't help but think that this could possibly help you develop your relationship with Hoseok on another level.

After settling down, things are going well with you and Hoseok welcoming freshman year of university together. You're just glad that he never changed despite him gaining more friends because of his bright personality.

Meanwhile, you're the opposite. Literally people avoid you when they see you or seem hesitant every time you make a conversation which is bs so you eventually give up on making new friends. Hoseok once told you that you have this “hostile” aura, though he tried to convince you to still try but you don’t care anymore. Him has always been enough.

Most people wonder how you and Hoseok are best friends because of how opposite the two of you are. There is one thing that you and Hoseok share a hobby though, dancing. Which is why after the house was purchased, you both decided to transform the basement into a mini dance studio, it’s literally just a room with full wall mirrors and of course, only his family supported the idea.

"We'll pay you back after we graduate, promise!" you giggled excitedly, both of your hands clasping together, thanking Hoseok’s parents for being supportive. Finally you can dance freely now that you are out of your parents' lair, they were never supportive of you venturing in the arts anyways.

Though you haven't actually delved into dancing fully, Hoseok knows how good you are since every time he sees you secretly practicing, he always gets mesmerized with your moves. You've never taken any dance lessons and yet you're already this good, a natural hence why Hoseok decided that he’s gonna help you in going back to it fully this time.

"Let's choreograph a dance together" Hoseok beamed at you while you both are eating breakfast one morning.

"Wait what? Why all of a sudden?" you pouted, looking at him in confusion. Though his idea is amazing, you're not sure if you're good enough compared to Hoseok. He's dancing skills are out of this world with years of professional experience and you're just, well, you who only dances for fun.

"Why not? Y/N you're naturally talented you know, I don't know why you can't see it" Hoseok smiled warmly at you and reached out to hold your hand across the countertop. You almost choked with your toast when you looked at his eyes so you covered it with a cough.

"Pshh fine, be patient with me okay? I'm not as good as you" you jokingly glared at him, snatching back your hand. You hope that the shade of the morning sunlight is covering your blush cause you definitely felt your cheeks heating up.

Yeah you have feelings for him. Yeah you love him, so what? It's not like you can stop yourself in developing them. You tried but with a guy like Hoseok, that's impossible. Though you've been planning to confess, you just don't have the perfect timing yet.

After a few weeks, you are planning to confess to Hoseok tonight so you texted him to meet at your favorite restaurant at 8pm. You said it's your treat so he promised to be there, I mean he never breaks his promises anyways.

You're feeling jumpy for the first time, well it's different since it's Hoseok. After years of keeping your feelings, you're finally ready to tell him. Funny how brave you are in everything else except for this one, you smiled to yourself. You were early at the restaurant and laughed at yourself. Okay maybe you're too excited on what's going to happen tonight. Minutes passed after 8 and he still hasn't come so you readied yourself while waiting for him.

He's late, I mean you shouldn't be panicking since it's only been a couple of minutes but you can't help getting worried so you texted him. You mentally giggled, adoring the cute nickname you have for him that you only change when you’re alone. You always set it back to “Hoseok” afterwards in case he calls you in public, especially at uni.

[Hobi loml <3: Hobi are you almost here?]

You didn't wanna be too pushy. One text is enough and you took a deep breath while waiting for him. The waiter stopped by but you dismissed him saying that your companion will be here any minute now.

45 minutes have passed and he's still not here. You waited for more and it’s now 9:30 so you’re agitated now.

[Hobi loml <3: Hobi? Are you still coming?]

When you didn't get a reply, you smiled bitterly and just asked the same waiter to take out the food you ordered. He looked at you sympathetically but good thing he didn't say anything.

Arriving at your shared home, you noticed that the lights were off. So he’s not even home, where tf could he possibly be at this hour. Just when you were about to call him, you received a text from Hoseok but a guy named Jimin is telling you that Hoseok is with them and that he would be staying the night at the boys’ dormitory.

So not only he forgot the formal dinner you prepared but he stood you up, basically ditching you to be with his new friends. He broke his promise..

You’re wondering if this is only the beginning of him breaking his promises to you.

A few months after that night, you notice that there’s something changing in Hoseok. You barely see him anymore since he spends a lot of time now with his other friends, but at least he still comes home at night and treats you the same. You’ve been waiting for a perfect time but you don’t want to delay your confession any longer so you decided to corner him one night after dinner.

“Hoseok, can we talk?” you muttered and he eyed you curiously.

“About what? And why are you fidgeting?” he coaxes you on, raising his eyebrows.

You straightened yourself and reached out to hold both of his hands, clutching them tightly.

Then staring into his eyes, you poured all your emotions on them as you declared what’s been deep down your heart for so many years.

“I like you, Hoseok” you smiled lovingly at him while his eyes widened in complete shock. His silence along with puzzled eyes looking back at you is making your heartbeat faster every second of him not doing anything.

“Y/N..” his voice came out unsure, I mean his face gave it all so now you’re very nervous.He probably thinks you’re just playing around and you’re getting restless.

“Hoseok, I’m serious okay?” you try to sound determined though your confidence is slowly dissipating.

Back in silence, you can tell he’s been trying to be careful with his words, maybe to try not to hurt you. God if he rejects you-

“I don’t know what to say, uhm..thanks?” if this is in another situation you would’ve thought how adorable he is scratching the back of his head.

Hoseok doesn’t know how to respond to you. He knows you’re usually upfront in most things but he didn’t expect this from you. He’s literally clueless on what to say but you’re his best friend so he trusts you.

What the hell got into you to think that a confession would be so simple. Well, you just decided to break the usual “I’ve been in love with my best friend for so long but I don’t want to ruin our friendship” thing. Not that there’s wrong with that, it’s very hard for some people to do so. So here you are, just finished confessing your feelings to your best friend and for the first time you’re nervous around him.

“Was I supposed to say ‘you’re welcome’?” you huffed, trying to act dismissive. “So what’s your answer? Again I told you I wasn’t joking, I like you Hoseok”. He gulped, you only use his real name when you’re very serious but he literally thought you were trying to prank him earlier or something.

“Uhm, can you give me some time?” he looks at you with hopeful eyes.

Fuck. You’re making him uncomfortable. Fuck.

“Shit, Hobi I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-” he cuts you off before you can even continue.

“No, no, it’s not that.. It’s just-” he paused and breathed deeply, gathering his thoughts.

“I totally understand if-” you’re already panicking given that you're now speaking faster than usual.

“I’m not really sure how to be in a relationship, there.” He blurted, letting out a deep sigh that made you pause. You didn’t expect he would be just honest about the real reason at the moment so you smiled at him.

“It’s okay Hobi, we can take it slow and-” you’re already saying too much but who cares, it’s not like he rejected you so there must be something, right?

“Look, um I can’t give you a real answer yet but I trust you so I want us to give a chance ‘kay?” his tone shifting softly while shuffling your hair, walking away outside after.

You pouted but nodded anyways. Hoseok’s glad that he got out of the conversation smoothly, at least now he’s relieved since you’re back to calling him “Hobi”.

Honestly, he’s happy knowing about your feelings for him. Smiling brightly at the night sky outside in the backyard of your shared home, thinking how he made his ever-confident best friend nervous just for a confession.

A ding from his phone pulled him out from his reverie,

[Unknown: We need to talk. Answer me or else she’ll know ;)]

Hoseok already knows who this is, given that he had blocked her numbers for a while now. He just didn’t expect that she’ll go this far, even going after you now. He just hopes this would be like the other warnings that he was able to handle.

[Unknown: image.]

[Unknown: Still not gonna answer me? You have a day <3]

He couldn't move from where he’s standing, staring at his phone in shock. This couldn't be happening, despite his confusion earlier you actually made his day better (as usual) but he doesn't know if he will be for yours after this anymore. Still staring at the text, Hoseok couldn’t think straight after what he just read. He’s hoping it’s not real, praying to all the gods out there that it's not what he thinks it is.

[Him: Fine. Let’s meet at the nearest cafe, don’t you dare do something]

[Unknown: Yay! Can’t wait to see you, good night <3]

Retreating for the night he passed by your bedroom, only to see you asleep on your desks with some unfinished homework and he smiled, you’ve always looked beautiful even when you’re sleeping. He chuckled by himself at how adorable you are, with your habit of not locking your door when you're busy.

Waiting at the said cafe felt like eons for Hoseok. He's mostly nervous because of the texts, especially that image. Getting absorbed in his thoughts he didn't realize the pair of arms that’s latching on his shoulders from behind and he jerked in surprise.

"Hobi! Did you miss me?" a high-pitched voice startled him and looked up sideways to see a pretty girl with an innocent looking face, ironically."Don’t call me that" he released a defeated sigh, yanking his arms from her hold.

Ahn Sohye, the girl who’s been going after him since the start of the school year that he has been desperately avoiding. Hoseok's bracing himself to whatever craziness she has in for him this time, doing his best to focus in order to get the clarification he’s been wanting.

“Awee why that face? And what? Cause Y/N’s the only one allowed to call you that?” Sohye scoffed, a tone of jealousy in her voice. Hoseok just frowned at her and was about to leave but her expression quickly changed, a sly smile towards him with warning eyes.

“Look!” her demeanour suddenly changed as she eagerly handed him a printed picture, and time stopped immediately.

An ultrasound picture.

No.

no,no,no,no.

“What the fuck is this?” he hissed at her, incredulous eyes now mixed with anger.

“Our little one of course” she squealed excitedly, batting her lashes at him.

“Stop fucking around with me Sohye, this isn’t funny anymore” Hoseok’s usually calm but his patience have been tested for weeks already and it’s getting worse but this one is beyond anything the girl has done before.

“Why are you so concerned anyways?” Hoseok gave her a look and she smiled mischievously. He went silent, eyes skeptical.

“Ah, her.” she quipped, a smile not faltering and that made Hoseok uneasy.

He’s having a hard time adjusting to everything. Is he really going to be a dad? Not that he hates kids but why does it have to be now? After you confessed? Everything’s been going well for him, for you both.

“This is the last straw Sohye, don’t you dare” Hoseok grits his teeth. You can’t find out about this. You just can’t. The memory of your saddened expression because of his lack of response suddenly flashed through his eyes. He doesn't wanna let you down any more than you already are.

“Why not? Won’t she support you? You guys are best friends after all” she mused. Yes, both you and Hoseok have been since you were little, but something definitely shifted from the platonic feelings he had for you after that night. He still wants to wait it out to be sure, but it’s definitely more than how normal friends would feel and apparently you are already feeling it way longer than him and he didn’t even ask when so now he feels way worse than before.

“You don’t understand, we-” Hoseok paused. He doesn’t want her to know, though there’s no point since Sohye seems to be getting the message already. He just didn’t want to show any signs that will confirm her suspicions.

“It’s not mine. No way in hell that’s mine” Hoseok’s rambling to himself in distress, he doesn’t know who he’s trying to convince other than himself.

“Of course it’s yours, that party remember? 2 months ago?” she cooed at him. His eyebrows are creasing together trying to rack his memory of what party Sohye is talking about.

“I don’t think you would remember any of it, you were very drunk” she giggled and that caused Hoseok to pale. That one party was hosted by one of Taehyung’s friends where he got so drunk that he didn’t remember anything the next day.

“No, that’s impossible. Taehyung told me I didn’t do anything rash that night”. Hoseok’s fidgeting right now. He’s usually careful, but that night his tolerance seems to get the best of him. Then he started remembering bits of pieces back...

“Hey, you’re the one who dragged me to the bed you know” she smirked, winking at him.“Why the fuck would I want you in bed with me?” he noticed his voice getting louder, as he was looking around the cafe people are already giving weird looks at their table.

“Here, watch” her smile, still annoyingly on like all of what she’s been planning this whole time has finally come to fruition.

A video. A fucking video taken by Sohye herself, but camera was on Hoseok only for the entire time. Of him calling her your name. Of him babbling about what he feels when you’re around. Of him letting all his emotions out in the open. He thought she was you, he was only seeing you when he’s drunk.

He’s speechless. He can’t think of what to respond to that one now. Sure the pictures can easily be dismissed but this video, this damn video is making him more helpless than he’s ever been already.

“So you see Hoseok, you can’t run away from me now” still frozen in his place he didn’t even swat her hand that she put them on top of him.

Meanwhile, you were just outside the cafe witnessing all of these happening. It’s not like you followed him here, you just happened to pass by since you’re going for groceries which is on the next block.

You know your best friend from the back of your hand. You can recognize him anywhere since you both have been inseparable ever since. So when you noticed his figure inside the cafe with someone, your heart clenched.

“Is he on a date?” you murmured to yourself. Is he? But why? You just confessed last night didn’t you? Is that why he didn’t give you an answer? Cause he’s already seeing someone and just didn’t want to hurt you? You recoil at the thought of him subtly rejecting you.

Hoseok couldn’t help but look sideways through the glass wall beside him to calm down and noticed someone standing there, looking straight at him.

He instantly jerked when he recognized it’s you.

You. Standing there, facing him and Sohye but now hurriedly leaving. He yanked his hands from her hold and immediately busted out through the door, hoping to catch you.

You don’t know why you started walking faster the moment he looked back at you from inside the cafe. Why the fuck were you even so obvious? He must think you’ve been spying on him or something.

“Y/N!” his voice is so loud calling you, but agitated. Hoseok doesn’t know why he suddenly has an urge to explain to you. To explain that what you saw was nothing to worry about.

You were fiddling your phone, pretending to look for something online when you felt his hand on your shoulder. Composing yourself, you faced him with a “surprise” look.

“Hobi, hi! I was going to get some groceries, do you want something specific?” you’ve put up a great acting which made Hoseok wonder if he was only imagining what he saw earlier.

“Uh, just buy my usual favorites hehe” his voice full of uncertainty. So he did really see you earlier lurking at him and his date. And Hoseok being Hoseok, didn’t confront you about it.

“Hobi! Wait for me” a woman’s voice suddenly interrupted you both and Hoseok paled as soon as he saw Sohye walking towards you both.

Please not now, please not yet-

“Oh you’re with someone” you’re trying to keep your voice neutral despite wanting to scream in frustration at the moment. You’re not gonna cry, you were never a crier anyways. No fucking way you’ll cry in front of Hoseok and his date.

You feel betrayed, even if Hoseok doesn’t owe you anything. It’s not like he answered you, did he? So he can do anything he wants to do, go on dates even if you already told him how you feel.

“Y-Y/N, it’s-” before Hoseok could explain the girl already gave out her hand to shake yours.

“It’s Sohye, Hoseok’s girlfriend”. She smiled at you, a knowing one. You know her of course, she’s the majority of Hoseok’s daily complaints to you since the beginning of the semester last year so now you’re really wondering how they are together now.

You stiffened. Your expression must be wavering since Hoseok tried to reach for you but she's already clinging into his arms to stop him.

You can’t crumble like this, you already looked pathetic from confessing to someone who’s already taken. But then it’s not like you know right? Hoseok would’ve told you the moment you confessed but he didn’t so maybe they JUST got together earlier inside?

“Uh Hi! Nice to meet you, I’m Y/N” you’re trying your best to show your most kindest smile even though they came out strained since you’re already dying inside.“Oh I know, Hobi told me a lot of things about you” she smiled at you, a feign one you see.

“Y/N-” you decided to cut him off, clearly you’ve interrupted something very important for them.

“I’m sorry I really have to go now, see you at home later Hoseok” you didn’t even look at his eyes and just turned away without letting him respond.

Hoseok’s distressed. He just hurt you again, and your expression earlier was even worse than the last time he saw you with it.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

He’s a fucking coward and he knows it. He’s too nice to the point that his indecisiveness is causing the most important person of his life in pain.

“Why did you tell her that you’re my girlfriend when you’re clearly not? He barked but Sohye just laughed at him mockingly.

“Are you kidding me? You’re the father of my child so obviously you’re my boyfriend now” she retorted and Hoseok scoffed. “I’m not your fucking boyfriend and you better clarify it with Y/N”. He’s on edge right now, he knows what you’re feeling and he knows for sure that you’re mad at him.

“Anyways, I’ll update you later bye” and she kissed him on the cheek.

The thing is, you saw everything though. After turning around when you’re supposed to be going to the convenience store, you hid at the corner of the street. To watch them, to torture yourself even more.And when you saw Sohye left a kiss on his cheek while he’s still lost in thought, you finally left.

Arriving at the convenience store, you pulled your hoodie up trying to cover your face as much as you can. Don’t want any strangers looking at you weirdly while shopping with tears. After grabbing necessities, you proceeded to the meat section to get pork slices since Hoseok loves bulgogi. Your tears started to fall through after staring at the couple of sliced pork packs that reminded you of when you and him were having a picnic at the park.

You remember Hoseok doing the barbecues and you just stared at him the whole time, until this day you still wonder if he knew about you ogling him before. Staring at him while he’s cooking made you realize how in love you are with this boy. Not because of his handsome face but because of how he is naturally him. How his smile always brightens you up. How his sweet and caring nature made it really hard for you to quell what you feel for him anymore.

After Sohye left, Hoseok immediately went to the convenience store and saw you at the cash register, ready to pay. He cuts you off before you give out your card, “Here, I’ll pay” with a crooked heart shaped smile directly at you. Though you noticed the simmering guilt in his eyes.

“No Hobi, you paid last time so just let me” your voice came out colder than you intended it to be that made Hoseok more guilty.

The cashier was looking at you both and snickered “So who’s going to pay? I’m all for equality and shit but just decide. You young couples are always complicated” she groaned.

Both you and Hoseok are stunned with the lady’s insinuation, well obviously you can’t believe you were still blushing so you're thankful that your face is semi-covered.

“Uh-” you were about to explain that you’re not a couple but Hoseok cut you out of it. “Me, I’m paying” he smiled at her and she offered a satisfied shrug, murmuring something about how “gentleman” Hoseok is. Why didn’t he correct her?

Hoseok offered to carry all the bags but you insisted. He must be really feeling pity for you right now. After leaving the convenience store, you both were quiet. Way different than before where you both usually banter and throw jokes at each other when walking to home.

This awkwardness needs to end.

“So, is that why you couldn’t answer me before?” you turned to him, trying to sound bold. You just want to know the truth, since he already lied to you.

“Uh no, actually-” cutting him off of his explanation you scoffed. Listen to his explanation Y/N just listen..

“You should’ve been honest with me you know, is it really hard for you?” your voice came out weaker. Since when did you both start keeping secrets to each other? Sure you do harmless small lies but not as big as this.

“Yes, I was and Sohye isn’t my girlfriend” his voice rising with panic. Hoseok’s feeling it again, the need to clarify things to you. Maybe because he now knows what you feel? Or maybe because he just doesn't want to hurt you even more.

“You didn’t have to lie, I saw you both at the cafe clearly on a date” you stated coldly.

“That wasn’t it, you’re misinterpreting everything” his voice went quieter, now pleading.

“It’s alright Hoseok, can we drop the subject now” you glared at him and walked faster towards your shared home.

Hoseok just sighed defeatedly, deciding to give you space since your mind is really closed for any explanation.

You wonder who’s going to “cook” since you can’t cook for shit but Hoseok’s pretty good though he’s very humble about it. Now that you both are in tension with each other, you were about to offer to buy take out when he beats you out of it again.

“I’ll cook, just let me Y/N” mimicking what you said earlier to him. Entering your bedroom, you gave out a big exhale to calm down and rationalize everything.

You’re being irrational and immature about the whole situation and it’s not fair for Hoseok. The smell of bulgogi made you come out of your room to the kitchen where he was preparing early dinner for you both.

A surprised gasp came out of your mouth the moment you saw how the dining table was arranged to like that of a formal date. With the fine plates and cutleries that you even forgot where you put, the mini candle light that you gifted him from last Christmas and the vase of daisies, your favourite.

“Hobi-” you started but he put his hands up to a stop.

“No, let me explain everything please” his usually warm and happy eyes look up at you sadly.

“Okay..”

“First of all, I’m sorry okay? I know you’re hurting already but please believe me when I tell you that me and Sohye are never together. She’s not my girlfriend and I didn’t lie in any means that night.” he’s fidgeting now because of nervousness.

“Hobi, I should be the one saying sorry to you for acting like that. You didn’t deserve it” you told him, voice lacing with emotion. You really grow weak when it comes to him.

Hoseok smiled with relief at you, you never show this emotional side to other people except him. He opened his arms wide and you didn’t hesitate to accept his embrace.

You stayed like that for a while, you being way calmer now because of his embrace and him running his hands through your hair while swaying you both slowly. As if doing this wouldn’t make you forgive him or something.

“Come, let’s eat. It's getting cold and oh, I cooked your favourite. I’m also making up for the dinner I missed last time” his usual sunny demeanour is back though an apologetic smile appeared on his heart-shaped lips.

“Thank you Hobi though this is too much for an apology, I can never hate you for so long” you chuckled, playfully hitting his arms.

After your make-up dinner, the atmosphere of your shared house went back to normal and you both decided to end the night with a movie.

Cuddling with him has always been your favorite. You just love skinship in general but you would never let anyone know that. You’re only like this to Hoseok anyways.

You both are debating again about the movie when you can feel the vibrations from his phone inside his pocket.

Hoseok grimaced the moment he looked at the name appearing on his phone. He looked at you but you didn’t seem to notice his reaction.

You did. Of course you did, it’s Sohye. His reaction gave it away but you pretended to be still immersed in the movie.

“Uh, I need to take this. Be right back hehe” he ruffled your hair with a strained smile and left to go outside. Props to him for being considerate, he’s trying to protect your already broken heart.

“What” he barked on the phone as soon as he answered Sohye’s call.

“Don’t snap at me Hoseok, did you tell her? She’s pretty down” she mused with fake sympathy on her voice.

“Is that really the only reason why you’re calling me?” Hoseok’s annoyed. This night was supposed to be a make-up night for you both and now she’s ruining it.

"No of course not, my parents want to meet you". Hoseok's blood ran cold. Sohye's parents..does this mean?

"Hey, are you even listening?!" Sohye screeched on the phone which made Hoseok put the phone away from his ears.

"Yeah I am, what the fuck do you mean meet your parents? No way" he responded with disbelief. He couldn't even wrap his head in the fact that he got someone pregnant accidentally when he was drunk and now he's already going to meet Sohye's parents?

"You will, I told them what happened and they want to meet the father of their soon to be grandchild. End of discussion" she stated coldly.

"Sohye-" before he can even try to plead to move things slow, the line went dead already.

An exhausted sigh came out of him with the new problem he's going to face from now on. Fuck.

Looking back at the house, he saw you at the doorway looking worriedly at him so he smiled to ease you.

Something's wrong. What's happening with him and Sohye? You didn't hear anything but you saw Hoseok's reaction to whoever he's calling.

You stopped him before he could continue.

"Is everything alright? you're trying to ease the obvious distress on his face but as usual he just shrugged.

"Yeah, don't worry it wasn't Sohye" his response seems flat and he couldn't look at your eyes so you're already suspecting that he's lying.

You pretended you didn't notice his lies and smiled back at him saying good night and retreats to your room.

You definitely noticed the changes in him after that night. He looks defeated and troubled every time you see him. Is this your fault? Did your confession cause all of this? But he would’ve told you differently, no?

It’s a miracle you’re catching him eating breakfast in the kitchen since had been avoiding you. “Hey Hobi you alright?” that seemed to shake him out of his thoughts.

“Y/N, hey you scared me” he chuckled awkwardly.

“Hobi what’s wrong? You know you can tell me anything right? I won’t judge”. He looks at you thoughtfully though you can't quite figure out what his eyes are telling you.

“I’m fine Y/N, just busy these days. You know how serious Yoongi is in this songwriting club that we just started” disappointment crossed your features at his dismissal of your concern. Maybe he just needs space, but it’s not like you’ve been clinging to him more than usual after your confession. Everything’s normal, even better, at least for you.

Hoseok flinched when he saw your disheartened face. He’s been trying to act like nothing’s going on even though he’s been frustrated on what to do next. He’s literally helpless. He needs to let this out to Namjoon since he knows he’s rational and would know what to do in any kind of situation.

“Oh okay, just tell me when you’re ready hmm?” you hoped that sounded less disappointed of him not opening to you. He didn’t even look at you when you hollered to say goodbye for class.

He couldn't look at you since he's afraid he'll slip up. He has to settle himself first before telling you. He wouldn't want to cause you any more pain so he needs to be prepared.

One morning, you woke up with the silent house. Maybe Hoseok went for an early jog so you helped yourself in the kitchen where you saw the breakfast that he already prepared.

“Had to leave early, here's your breakfast! :)” - Hobi <3

Ugh, why are you still not used to him being sweet when he was always like this? Okay maybe things just magnified once you realized your feelings for him.

You wonder where he went though. Sohye? Nah, you don't think so.You both just went back to normal so you're not going to be the reason to put you both in that awkward situation again.

You dismissed your thoughts and decided to do full house cleaning since it's the weekend. And hey, you kinda miss cleaning so-

The doorbell rang and you dropped your cleaning supplies to check. That's strange, you didn't order anything so it must be Hoseok's.

He's nervous. Scratch that, he's fucking terrified of meeting Sohye's parents. Not only that, he lied to you again. This one just an addition to the rising amount of lies he now seems easily to do to his best friend.

"Just relax, they're gonna love you" Sohye's trying to calm him down by caressing his arms but he pulled away.

"Are you sure that's even mine? How do I fucking know for sure?" he hissed and Sohye whined.

"Would I fucking involve my parents if this isn't serious? You didn't know the shit I went through after they found out" her voice came out meekly which surprised him.

Hoseok paused. He's been too absorbed of what's happening to him to the point that he didn't even think of what Sohye is feeling for all of this.

Sure she annoyed the fuck outta him but if this baby she's carrying is actually his, then Sohye's going to be one of his responsibilities too.

"What? I- I thought they were supportive Sohye" his voice is calm compared to the usual harshness and this startled her.

"We're still in university, this pregnancy will delay my graduation so duh" she tried to be dismissive about it but Hoseok can see the subtle troubled look in her eyes.

When they reached the Ahn residence, Hoseok's heartbeat seemed to multiply even more. Sohye intertwined their hands and he didn't bother stopping her because he couldn't really think of anything right now.

Sohye’s parents welcomed them both and guided them to the living room where they’ll discuss the “future”. Hoseok couldn’t help but feel that he needs to make a good impression to Sohye’s parents otherwise.

“Hello, Mr and Mrs. Ahn I’m Jung Hoseok” Hoseok bowed and smiled though he still can’t meet their eyes with his own.

“Oh you’re so polite and warmingly charming” Mrs. Ahn mused with an endearing voice.

“So you are the one who knocked up my daughter” Mr. Ahn spat, eyes now glaring at Hoseok and he played with the scrutinizing eyes.

“Dad, can you please not scare him?” Sohye shrieked, shielding Hoseok from her father.

“She’s right sweetie, calm down hmm? Hoseok’s seem to be a good boy” Hoseok is kind of relieved that at least Mrs. Ahn is nicer to him than the latter.

“So when’s the wedding date?”

Everyone went silent as soon as Mr. Ahn dropped the million dollar question.

Mrs. Ahn looked intently at the both of them while She's giving expectant looks to Hoseok who can’t seem to remove his gaze from the floor.

Finally after a long inhale of breath, Hoseok raised his eyes to face Mr. Ahn .

“With all due respect,”

“You ARE marrying my daughter am I correct?” Mr. Ahn cutting him off made him falter but he has to man up now. This isn’t something he can run away from anymore.

“Dad, me and Hobi still wanted to graduate,” Sohye stated.

“But you both will have a child soon so it’s better to get married now before your graduation” Mrs. Ahn added, her demeanour now getting serious.

Hoseok’s panicking right now but he doesn’t care anymore if it looked obvious as he was trying to find alternative ways to escape this route, surely there has to be other than marriage.

This will ruin everything that he's planned for himself and well, you. The thought of you made Hoseok winced.

You who he's already hurting

You who loves him for as long you could remember

You who do not know about any of this

You who is-

"Hoseok!" hands tugging his arms made him come back to reality where Sohye's been trying to get his attention.

"Huh?"

"What's your answer going to be? Mr. Ahn and Hoseok gulped.

"I-um I'll marry her" his voice came out stable which surprised him. Is he really gonna be doing this? Get married? He's not even ready but how about Sohye?

The thought of Sohye keeping their child from him if he ever refuses made him convinced himself that he's doing the right thing.

"Really? Omg that's great!" Sohye squealed along with her mother sharing the happiness with Hoseok's decision while Mr. Ahn was looking at Hoseok with knowing eyes.

"Come along" Sohye's father gestured him to their mansion's garden and now the nervousness is back on Hoseok's veins.

"Sir-"

"You don't love my daughter, I know.I can see it, I'm not blind kid"

Hoseok gasped lightly. Well he shouldn't be surprised since his expressions have always been obvious. Dammit why can't he be better in acting?

"I-yes you're right" he's been trying to calm down but he couldn't stop his legs from fidgeting.

"But you're marrying my daughter regardless" Mr. Ahn wondered.

"It's the right thing to do" he responded firmly which surprised the older man.

Silence ruled the both of them until Mrs. Ahn called in for lunch.

You opened your door to a mailman delivering what seems to be baby supplies. Huh?

"Uhm sorry, did you get the wrong address? the mailman stared back at you warily before showing you the receipt that displays Hoseok’s name.

“This is Mr. Jung Hoseok’s residence is it not?” you were caught off guard to the sassiness of the mailman so you grabbed the boxes he was holding.

“Yes, thank you” you offered an embarrassing smile.

“You’re welcome and congrats by the way” he replied while eyeing the boxes and immediately left.

You stood there for a while trying to process what the mailman just said. He thought you’re Hoseok’s wife or something? He thought you’re pregnant? Wait.

Baby supplies. Why would Hoseok need baby supplies?

And then it struck you,

Sohye.

Your heart shattered with the revelation that you almost dropped the boxes. Why? Why would Hoseok lie to you again? You both just made up and now this?

He confuses tf out of you. He says he doesn’t wanna hurt you but here he is, hurting you even more each day.

Fuck, you feel pathetic. Bet your homegirls back in uni’s gonna laugh at how much you’ve become weak just because of a boy.

But he’s not just some boy,

He’s your best friend,

And the love of your life

But lately with the lies and secrets, you’re not even sure if you know him anymore.

The lunch with the Ahn family consisted of talking about the wedding plans, all seems to be a blur to Hoseok as he just keeps nodding to whatever they say to him.

“Hobi, honey, when do you think is the perfect date?” Sohye grasps his arm which makes him turn to her and he’s trying not to barf with the endearment she just called him because her parents are around.

“Uh-idk I have to talk to my folks first” he replied nervously which made both Sohye’s parents focus on him.

Fuck.

“Yeah he didn’t know about it so take it easy” Sohye whined at her parents.

“And besides, I’m not even sure if that baby is mine” he added. The sudden accusatory remark towards Sohye changed the atmosphere, cold all of the sudden and Hoseok immediately regretted the words that came out from him.

Where in the fucking world did he even get the confidence to say out loud what’s been bugging him in this situation.

“What did you just say?” Mr. Ahn growled, actually now getting angry. Sohye went rigid beside Hoseok and speechless and Mrs. Ahn let out a surprised gasp.

Shit, it’s now or never.

“If I’m being honest, I don’t trust anything that comes from your daughter, seeing as how she’s been chasing and threatening me since the beginning of the school year” he stated, voice hard while glaring at Sohye knowingly.

“How dare you insult us in our own home?” Mrs. Ahn yelled at him. Hoseok’s confidence faltered, vanishing but he stood on his ground.

“I’m serious, I won’t marry her until I know for sure if it’s mine” Hoseok’s proud that his voice came out stable.

“Sohye, why don’t you guide Hoseok out” Mr.Ahn stated calmly which made Hoseok nervous again, the old man must have felt betrayed given how Hoseok suddenly changed his mind after their talk earlier.

The table was silent until Sohye stood up wordlessly and grabbed Hoseok towards the outside of their mansion.

Before they could even reach the gate, a sudden hand landed on Hoseok’s left cheek.

“Fuck you Hoseok” Sohye grits her teeth, eyes with fury while looking at him intently.

No lie, that slap hurts but Hoseok didn’t even care because his eyes were on the gate.

On you.

And you’re in rage now that you witnessed what just happened and Hoseok knows how protective you are of him.

The lack of response caused Sohye followed his gaze, now on you and she laughs, hysterically.

You were already walking towards them with that furious expression, the one that actually scares Hoseok.

“HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TO SLAP HIM YOU BITCH” you screamed with fury the moment you reach the both of them and was about to grab Sohye but Hoseok stopped you just in time.

“Y/N stop!” Hoseok’s trying to stop your arms that are reaching Sohye who’s still laughing, clearly amused by your outburst. She wonders if you already know but judging by Hoseok’s anxious eyes looking back at her, she knew it was the latter.

Well, what a perfect time.

“Oh Y/N, what are you doing here? I don’t remember inviting you” Sohye smiled at you mockingly, obviously trying to get into your skin and you’re falling for it.

“Cut the crap you bitch, how dare you-” you were about to attack again and actually almost succeeded because you actually caught her arm when-

“She’s pregnant Y/N stop!” Hoseok shouted which made you froze from flailing your arms around and you jerked in shock.

The devastated expression that emerged from your beautiful face made Hoseok’s heart lurched. He didn’t have the intention of telling you this way, this wasn’t supposed to happen.

“W-What?” your mind went blank. You came here expecting an explanation from Hoseok about the baby supplies package you received earlier. Why is he so goddamn good at hurting his best friend? No this is a joke, this has to be.

“Yes, Y/N I am pregnant and Hoseok’s the father” Sohye squealed, looking at you with those triumphant eyes with a slick smile. Wait, does she know of your feelings?

You averted your eyes to Hoseok now that the truth is out. You were hoping for a different reaction but the moment his eyes met yours, they’re full of shame. Fuck, it really hurts coming from him.

The realization finally crept into your mind with everything that's been happening to Hoseok ever since the night of your confession.

Sohye, avoiding you, going somewhere without telling you..it all makes sense now. But what's not making sense is how he kept lying to you all this time.

"Y-YN-" Hoseok is like a deer caught in headlights, guilty eyes that are now morphing into full of panic. He knows you, does he really though? He doesn't even know himself anymore.

You're usually composed, especially with other people around. You're that kind of person who remains calm even in rough commotions. But it's totally different when it involves the man you cherish and love..

And before you could reply, a middle aged couple emerged behind Hoseok who reminded you of Sohye and remembered that you're in their premises, the Ahn residence.

"What is going on here?" Mrs.Ahn eyed the three of you suspiciously, primarily staring at you. Ah, the stranger.

"Nothing Mom, this is Y/N, Hoseok's best friend" Sohye smiled sarcastically to you with those knowing eyes, challenging you to continue.

Embarrassment filled you once you came back to reality and snatched your arms from Hoseok's grasp. Breathing deeply, you tried to compose yourself before looking up at both of Sohye's parents.

"Really? I thought she IS his girlfriend given the fact that he had refused to marry you" Mr.Ahn stated coldly, still eyes on Y/N.

Hoseok turned around to face Sohye's parents, thinking of putting his arm around you but hesitated.

He knows you're mad at him so he opted to move slowly in front of you, trying to protect you from the scrutinizing eyes of Sohye's parents. Noticing this you raised your chin and looked directly into Mr. Ahn's eyes.

"No, I'm not his girlfriend but he's one of the most important people in my life as I am to him so whatever situation you've put him through, I need to know" you seethed, eyes full of determination though the phrase "not his girlfriend" almost distracted you.

You're surprised your voice came out confident despite the nervousness that might be etched now on your face.

"Well young lady, we were just talking with your friend about wedding preparations but seems like he's changing his mind" Mrs. Ahn glared at Hoseok.

"I already told you that I have to talk to my family first and figure out what really happened that night. I'll update you as soon as I can, I swear" he hurriedly explained, nervously looking back at you to gauge your reactions.

"Alright then, we hope to hear from you soon". Mr. Ahn replied coldly, his eyes landing on Y/N and that made Hoseok uneasy.

Sohye's parents went back inside and you stepped back from behind Hoseok with a stoic expression, in no way you'll show Sohye how affected despite of your suspicion that she knows already.

"Brave of you to come here Y/N, but props you both are fun to watch" she chuckled and you didn’t want to give her the satisfaction so you fought yourself, bitch.

"I'm just fetching Hoseok and since I think everything's done here, we're leaving" you turned around, not waiting for any response from the both of them. You felt hurried steps behind you,trying to catch up but you didn't bother.

Inside the car, the silent tension that surrounds the both of you is deafening. Hoseok nibbled his lips anxiously, feeling your anger from the revelation earlier. It's his fault so he has to settle this down before arriving home.

"Y/N I'm sor–"

"You lied to me, again" you cut him off with a blank expression, tone contemptuous.

"I know but–"

"We promised each other after that night that there would be no lies anymore" you bristled.

"I didn't wanna hurt you more than I already am okay?!" he blurted out, eyes turning glassy. Hoseok's trying to take a deep breath to stop himself from tearing up.

You sneered and didn't bother to respond,the nerve of him to be upset in this situation.

"I'll sleep at Namjoon's" he mumbled meekly and you quickly dropped him at his friend’s house.

“Good night Y/N” he inhaled sharply when you didn’t respond or even looked back at him. “I’m sorry” he mumbled, exiting the car with a gloomy expression.

You waited on your seat for a while, trying to hold in every emotion that has been building until he was further away. Hands turning white as you grip the steering wheel, you took a deep breath and started bawling your eyes out in pain.

In excruciating pain. What’s going to happen between you and Hoseok now? All your hopes of a future together are now shattered. It was going so well, you confessed and he gave you a chance and now this.

To Namjoon’s surprise, it was a miserable Hoseok who’s standing in front of his dorm room instead of the japchae delivery he’s been expecting. He didn’t ask for more and stepped aside to let his friend in.

“Alright man what happened?” Namjoon asked worriedly and Hoseok’s tears welled up in his before exhaling deeply.

“She knows Joon” Hoseok whispered, trying to stop his tears and Namjoon sat down on the couch urging his friend to continue.

“Everything happened so fast..Y/N was going after Sohye after she saw her slap me so I had to admit the truth right there” he felt his throat closing up when he recalled your crushed reaction earlier. How he wishes he could’ve told you in a different situation.

"She'll find out eventually though" another voice replied, and Hoseok turned his head back to see another person coming in the living room. Immediately recognizing Namjoon's roommate he walked up to him and hissed,

"You told me nothing happened that night!" he yelled and poor Taehyung grabbed Hoseok's arm that's on his collar in an attempt to calm him down.

Namjoon immediately stood up in panic and rushed towards both boys, struggling to get Hoseok off from Taehyung.

"Hobi, hey, calm down" Namjoon spoke calmly and Hoseok let go of Taehyung instantly.

"Hyung, I'm sorry I swear the only time I saw you was when we were drinking and the morning after. Jungkook told me you left with someone so I thought that was Y/N coming to pick you up" the younger man reasoned with fear, knowing how Hoseok gets when he's absolutely angry.

"Well it wasn't, it was Ahn Sohye and we slept together apparently" he answered slowly, more calmer now. What's the point of blaming other people when it already happened, it's going to change anything.

Only Namjoon knew at the beginning as soon as Hoseok heard the news and told him immediately, asking for help. Meanwhile the rest of his friend group didn't know about it until, well starting now.

"Stay for the night, you're always welcome here anyways" Namjoon patted Hoseok's shoulders softly and grabbed Taehyung to set up for dinner, which just arrived when they heard a knock from the door.

"Thanks Joon, and sorry for my outburst earlier Tae" he shuffled the younger's hair affectionately.

Hoseok wasn't there in the morning and a few mornings after that. You debated to ask his sister if she knew about this whole thing or what. She could've known and just didn't want to tell you to spare your feelings but you didn't care.

Calling Jiwoo 언니..

"Hello? Y/N?" she answered cautiously. Ah, always obvious just like her little brother.

"So you knew" you muttered passively. How could she? You both are like sisters from different mothers.

"Don't be mad please, I just found out too!" voice laced with alarm.

When you didn't reply she then proceeded to explain to you that Hoseok did go to his family to tell them the entirety of the situation. Why didn't he text you to meet there? Despite what happened, you would've been by his side, supporting him because that's what best friends do.

But then you remember last night and suddenly your anger resurfaced and you ended the call immediately, getting ready to leave only to be greeted by Seokjin at the door.

"Good morning" he smiled at you, filled with compassion.

"They sent you didn't they?" you snarled, frowning at his handsome face as you stepped aside to let him in.

"Hoseok actually since you know, you can't cook. He just wants to make sure you get a proper breakfast" he mused, rummaging the kitchen for ingredients.

"How sweet of him" you replied sarcastically, taking a seat at the kitchen counter with both hands on your face to cover your expression from Jin.

"Hey give him a break, all this is not easy for him too" he stated solemnly, giving you a serious look, placing the waffles and omelet that he just cooked.

You glared at him and started eating silently. Seeing him sit in front of you, you know he's looking at you closely deciphering your current emotions.

"I'm fine" you stated as you looked up at him and though his eyes widened at your lack of sadness, his eyes are still skeptical.

"No, you're not. We heard what happened" he answered with caution. You almost faltered but you remained composed, acting dismissive as usual.

"I AM fine, drop it Seokjin" you jeered. Seokjin wanted a reaction from you so there you have it, only anger though. He texted the rest that you seem to be alright and that they'll meet with others soon.

"Hurry, we're going somewhere" he quickly cleaned up the table and gestured to you to follow him outside. You grumbled but agreed anyways.

"If you're bringing me to Hoseok don't bother" you glanced at him blankly before looking outside the car window, obviously you don't want to seek him out unless he needs something from you.

"No you'll help us prepare, the boys want your opinion" Jin explained calmly, still wary of your mood.

You didn't answer him and just scoffed so he took it as a yes. You don't want any confrontation from the rest of Hoseok's friends but you can't really escape them so might as well.

Tonight, you saw the lights are on as you're walking into the driveway.

He's home, and you're nervous on how to approach him.

“I’ll be your maid of honour” you whispered. Hoseok looked up at you, eyes surprised at your sudden conviction.

“W-What? B-but Y/N..” he tried reaching on your arm but you stepped back and that made him pause. Hoseok should feel happy that you’re going to his wedding but he can’t help but feel wrong.

“My decision’s final, I don’t care but don’t try to stop me. I already confirmed with your sister” you stated coldly, still not looking into his eyes.

"I don't like hurting you, Y/N please. You don't have to attend the wedding, it's fine with me" his voice pleading, still trying to convince you despite your final decision earlier.

See? How can you not love him? Even in rough times like this, he is still considerate of your feelings.

You sighed, “Don’t be ridiculous, I’m your best friend and this is an important part of your life so I should be there” you stated, finally looking back into his eyes.

You're not gonna cry

You're not

You're getting tired of it..

Focusing on other thoughts to stop yourself from crying you didn't notice Hoseok approaching you slowly. When his hands cupped your face, it broke out your reverie.

"Y/N, I-"

You already have a feeling of what he's going to say the moment you met his eyes earlier, they've always been so expressive.

"Don't. Not now Hoseok, not anymore" you looked at his eyes that mirror with your sadness. He inhaled sharply, eyes changing with determination.

"No, Y/N" the way he says your name with a smile is making you nervous and before you could muster a response, a pair of soft lips touched yours and you immediately closed your eyes.

Is this finally happening? Hoseok kissing you? You only hoped about this before but you didn't think it's finally happening. He feels the same now right?

"Hoseok.." you croaked breathlessly after you released each other. He didn't release his hold on your face in which you're leaning, hoping that this is not only your imagination.

"Let me show you.. please.." his eyes begged. Not gonna lie, you've been waiting for this moment to happen but you both see it in a different way.

Him, showing gratitude while you..

While you're taking advantage of him for your own selfish reasons.

Bringing your hands up on top of his face, you smiled back at him and nodded.

He’s giving you a chance, though this seems like charity even but you don’t care anymore.

So you did.

Hoseok woke up the next day feeling relieved but mostly happy to have finally shown you his feelings, though he’s not sure if you heard his declaration last night. Expecting your presence beside him he turned around and reached out, only to find an empty space.

Suddenly sitting up in dread, he looked around trying to find you. Getting up and hastily putting on his clothes, he went outside directly to the kitchen but you are nowhere to be found. His chest tightened at the thought of you leaving him after what happened last night.

Was he too forward? But you gladly accepted him. Was that an act? D-did you already fall out of love from him?

Before he could continue his thoughts, his phone dinged beside him at the counter. Though he’s expecting Sohye, the text surprisingly came from his sister.

[지우 Noona: Y/N’s and I are in the boutique right now, where are you?]

[Hobi: jwu why? am I needed somewhere?]

[지우 Noona: Go meet with the wedding planner with Sohye in an hour]

He was gonna ask about you but hesitated. Why didn't you text him or leave a note? You just acted like nothing happened and that made Hoseok concerned.

Damn. When you said you'll help with the wedding preparations, you didn't expect to be leading the way. Apparently, that's Hoseok's request according to the wedding planner.

You've been giving your all into this, most likely because you want to distract yourself from what happened that night and what will happen in the wedding. You keep thinking of why Hoseok would want you when clearly, he doesn't feel anything for you.

Or does he?

You weren't sure if you were just imagining him saying "I love Y/N" when his arms were holding you tight after your rendezvous the night before. It must be your subconscious trying to fulfill your innermost desire, for your best friend to love you back.

"Hey, Y/N you alright? You look a little worned out" Jiwoo looked at you worriedly, running her eyes around your face.

Yeah your brother drained tf out of me..

"WHAT?!!" you jerked with her shrieking and then you realized you said that thought out loud and your face flushed with shame.

Fuck.

"Uh-" now you can't look at her eyes, cheeks going red with what you just told her.

fuckfuckfuck

"Omgggg, now I get why" she happily mused that made you raise your eyebrows back at her.

"Wtf why?" you shifted uncomfortably, never before you've been this aloof to Hoseok's sister until now.

"I texted him earlier but he said he's still at home at this time which surprised me" she teased, wiggling her eyebrows at you.

"He's about to get married, you know" you smiled bitterly, gaze focusing on the white wedding dress on display. Would've been lovely if you're the one who's getting married to Hoseok.

"And? It's not like he and Sohye are in a relationship" she huffed. Jiwoo's right but somehow, that didn't change the already creeping guilt inside you.

"Whatever, that's never happening again" you scoffed but she looks at you suspiciously.

"I'm serious, I value marriage and it will be a form of cheating if that happens again after the ceremony so, no" you firmly stated, looking away. You've been planning to distance yourself after the wedding since that would be what's best for both you and Hoseok.

Jiwoo looked at you wistfully, with sympathetic eyes that you've been getting used to from the people around you the moment Hoseok and Sohye's wedding was announced.

"Y/N, I'm sorry you have to feel this way. I know how much you love him" she replied softly, laced with emotion since you're like a little sister to her, after all she was hoping you'll end up with her little brother.

"It's okay, I'm used to it" you smiled curtly, your expression changing back to neutral like it has always been.

Since you've put all your time into the wedding preparations which clearly affected your academic performance, the preparations went smoothly as you planned.

Hoseok's been trying to corner you, but you're silently thankful for the people who keep distracting him because you're clearly not ready to talk to him.

Isn't that what you've always wanted? Now why are you running away? I mean you are going to eventually but you promised you'll be there for him. Fuck it, just a little bit more..

On the night before his wedding, you've stayed in your hotel room again like what you've been doing the entire time when you know Hoseok's around. You didn't even go to the bachelorette party you were clearly invited for and he's having a stag night too.

Around 3am you were awakened by loud knocks of your hotel door and for the sake of other guests on this floor, you dragged your feet and opened the door impulsively.

Only to see a drunk Hoseok, groggily smiling at you.

"Why are you here? It's already early morning" you hissed and he just giggled in response.

"Wanna see you" he pouted and you gestured to him just in case he'll vomit which is about to happen as you see his face contorted.

"Fuck come here quick!" you're rubbing his back as he releases all remnants of his stomach into the toilet when he staggered.

"Y/N I'm sorry" his voice sounded so broken and you straightened yourself. He's not gonna remember anything in the morning anyways so what's the point.

You didn't answer him but you helped him clean up and before you can even talk to him, he's already knocked out on your bed. Should you call someone to get him? But everyone's asleep now, screw it.

You stayed beside Hoseok, staring at his sleeping face for the last time, the last time you'll be able to be this near to him since he'll be a married man tomorrow. You can't stop your tears as you run your hands through his face.

"I love you Hoseok, I love you so much that I am letting you go" you stopped yourself to cry louder in case it'll wake him up. You wrapped your arms around him, relishing a few hours of selfishness on your own end.

The morning comes and you're dreading to let go of Hoseok. He woke up with you already staring at him and you jerked.

"Here are painkillers, drink that before you go" you handed them to him but he grabbed you wrist instead, silently pleading you to look at him.

"Y/N, let's run away" he croaked. Hoseok actually heard you the night before, heard you letting go of him and it crushed everything in him, hearing your voice so broken because of him and he wants to make you feel better even though you both know how late it is already.

"What? Are you crazy? You're getting married hours from now" you yelled at him. You've never lashed out on him like this but his plan is ridiculous. You're already guilty of sleeping with him and now he wanted to elope?

"I don't care, I just–" a knock from the door made him pause and your eyes widened. Fuck fuck fuck. You and Hoseok looked at each other's eyes full of panic now.

You walked towards the door and prepared yourself for any interrogation when you were met with sleepy eyes and a smirk.

"Wtf do you want Yoongi" you seethed, you haven’t slept properly since you tried to stay awake as much as possible.

After hearing that it's only his friend, Hoseok appeared behind you, with a relief expression.

"You two looked like shit, be thankful I volunteered to get him" he snickered and you glared at him.

"Nothing happened" you answered nonchalantly but Yoongi's teasing smirk is still on so you turned back to Hoseok but then you're suddenly enveloped with a firm hug, with Hoseok's face nuzzling your neck.

"Thank you" he hummed and released you. You can tell through his eyes that he wanted to stay longer and talk to you more but you shake your head.

"Alright man let's go, they've been looking everywhere for you" Yoongi grabbed Hoseok who's still reluctant to leave.

"Go, Hoseok" you slightly push him towards Yoongi with a serious tone and just when they were about to leave, Jiwoo suddenly appeared in the corner.

“I knew it, I should’ve looked here first. Thank you Yoongi” the boy just nodded back at Jiwoo gave you the "i told you so" look, though not judgmental, you felt the need to clarify to prove your point the last time you talked.

Time of the wedding,

Time to let Hoseok go, permanently.

You are the maid of honour so you have no choice but to put on a happy face especially in front of Hoseok's parents who were constantly checking on you during preparations with apprehension.

After the bridesmaids and groomsmen have walked the aisle, it's finally your turn and it fucking sucks since you have to walk alone.

You took a deep breath before raising your chin up, and faced everyone as they looked at you walking up to the altar. However, your eyes are only on Hoseok as you imagine that it was you he's waiting for, not the actual bride behind you.

Hoseok is doing the same thing, ironically. He's imagining that it's you he is marrying, the person he truly loves but it's too late for that so he should just focus on Sohye.

He continued his daydreaming until Jungkook nudged him since the youngest best man is the closest to him than the other 6, breaking his thoughts and facing the reality that Sohye is the bride, not you.

When the officiant asked if there was someone who disagrees with the couple's union, your body wanted to stand up and tell everyone how you really feel. You felt Jiwoo's arms around your shoulders, hoping to provide the comfort that you needed but you shrugged her arms off.

You wouldn't mind usually but you're in her little brother's wedding and you've been refusing to meet Hoseok's eyes until the officiant proceeded with the next part of the ceremony. You can't look at him or else you'll crumble and there's no way you'll embarrass yourself in front of his family and yours.

Surprisingly, your parents came when you invited them. It would usually have to be Hoseok or any of his family members invite them to come though you already have a suspicion that it's not the only reason why.

“Do you Jung Hoseok, promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her and hold only unto her forever more?” this caused you to finally look back at Hoseok. He stayed silent for a few moments which made everyone chatter in whisper but as soon as his eyes found yours, he smiled, full of longing.

"I do"

You closed your eyes as tears fell from them, unable to hold his gaze anymore. It might be improper to look back on the best night of your life but you can’t help it, you just want to hear Hoseok say it again, over and over.

“I love you Y/N”

Another morning of Hoseok waking up without you in his life. Tears ran down the sides of his face when he remembered, but this one is longer and the clearest of them all.

That dream's too vivid for him to handle. He smiled bitterly as he remembered all the memories, starting from the beginning up until the shift of your friendship that severed you both.

Chuckling pathetically at himself to even have the audacity to think of you when he's the very main reason you were gone. He just misses you so much.

In your absence, he indulged himself into alcohol only because he remembers you nagging him to be mindful of his tolerance. He knows it's not good for him, but it's the only way to forget his pain of losing you.

It's not like he's being irresponsible to the point of getting piss drunk, he just drinks when he's alone because that's when the thought of you creeps back into his mind.

Getting up to face another day of wallowing, he decided to come down to the basement to do some cleaning. The mini studio, the only thing he has of you left. This is the reason why he didn't wanna sell the house in the first place.

He then went to a nearby speaker and set the song you both choreographed ages ago, another memory coming up, haunting him.

"Alright that's it, it's been a minute! Surely that's enough right?" you whined at Hoseok, heaving since you've been dancing for like hours now.

"It's less than a minute! Come on, we're just doing the extended chorus" he giggled and you rolled your eyes.

"But yeah, we don't have to do the whole song" his eyes trained on you and the folded Led Zeppelin shirt on the chair. You followed his gaze through and found him eyeing your precious shirt.

"I'm gonna wear it when we're filming this dance, it's from my grandma remember? And I'm gonna pair it with those red orange pants you gifted me on my birthday" you fondly explained to him.

Hoseok never took you for being sentimental since you always act dismissive when you receive gifts from him.

The voice of Troye Sivan echoing throughout the room brought him back to the present reality. He still feels you around the house, especially here so he went in front of the mirror and readied himself.

He looked back at his reflection in the mirror, instantly seeing you beside him with an affectionate smile. He lets himself give in to his imaginations, just this time. Starting the moves smoothly, Hoseok will always remember this choreo out of all the ones he made because it's you.

Always have been you but he was a coward for not acting on his feelings earlier. The song ended and he fell into his knees, hitting the floor while another gut-wrenching sobs escaped his mouth.

You laid out your feelings for him but he doubted himself when he clearly feels the same so now here he is.

Still in grief full of regrets..

Still wishing you'll come back to him..

Still clinging to the ghost of you..

taglist : @hobisnesseu @ggukkieland @sheprocrastinatesalot @hoebii @jeonsbun @iamscharene

It's up to you where Y/N is or what happened to her :')

And yes the dance is by Hobi and Ryujin from Highlight Reel ♡

Thank you for reading! Feedback's greatly appreciated!

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