#Sorry I've only really been posting vent stuff

[thatonesimp-e]

yeah

Everything in the background (if you can read it) is what I remember my dad saying. Even then I think I'm a little off. Was too busy beating the shit out of a soldier as a scout in tf2 <3

[basket-of-radiants]

Why were you so disappointed by Rhythm of War?

This has been sitting in my askbox for years. I've taken several cracks at answering, only to get frustrated with the subject matter and burn myself out every time. I didn't like Rhythm of War. More than that, I didn't like it in a way that tainted my enjoyment of the entire series. And despite what it may seem, I don't actually enjoy discussing things which I don't like. I always want to talk from a place of good faith. Which is why now that my feelings towards the series are a little more positive, I think I can finally answer this.

I'm going to try to stay away from specific plotpoints and story beats for this post, because my goal isn't to nitpick (if for no other reason than it would take a week to write this post), I'm just looking to talk about my overall impressions. I think that might mean the only spoilers here will be structural? idk, if you haven't read Rhythm of War yourself then you should probably do that before looking for other people's opinions anyway. 

I liked Way of Kings when I first read it. I didn't love it at the time, but I liked it. Certainly enough to keep reading once I'd finished. One thing that made me a bit uncomfy, however, was the war against the Parshendi. They were this unknowable enemy which the book was not interested in knowing. An inhuman army. Their main purpose was to kill Kaladin's friends, or else be killed by Dalinar's armies. And yet the Parshendi, and the parshmen in the form of Shen, did show hints of personhood. And so it bothered me how Dalinar spoke so casually about how the Alethi had decimated their numbers, how the others used the war as a means to amass wealth and power. (It didn't bother me in a "this is a bad book" way but in a "these characters are bad people" way.)

One of my foibles as a reader is that when a book is very clearly treating one side of a conflict with more humanity, I tend to be a bit predisposed towards the other to account for that. And with the Alethi clearly being the invading party and superior military force, there was also some underdog favoritism. I didn't really like how the book treated the Parshendi. This is to say that going forward, the singers would be more important to me than any other through line.

So imagine my delight at reading Words of Radiance and meeting Eshonai, one of the Parshendi, who even gets her own point of view sections! They were no longer being treated as a faceless mass, we were getting to see things from their perspective as well. And it became plain to see the damage the Alethi had done to them. I couldn't really bring myself to root for Dalinar or really any of the humans against the listeners. I couldn't even bring myself to like most of these characters. I still enjoyed the book but once it became clear there wouldn't be a peaceful conclusion, let's just say that I wouldn't have wept for Dalinar and Adolin if Szeth had managed to off them. Like everyone in the book, I assumed that going forward all the parshmen would be turned into evil voidbringers in the everstorm and that the listeners were mostly dead. Except for Rlain, and Eshonai because I'd read or been told that book 4 would be Eshonai's book and thus had assumed she was fine. (Oathbringer spoilers, she was not fine.) So ultimately it was still a bit of a downer way to end the book. 

So imagine my delight at reading Oathbringer, where for the first time singers were being treated as people, full and real people, and where the human characters could no longer ignore or dismiss them. We met Khen and the others, common singers who were sympathetic and just wanted freedom from bondage. We see Venli grapple with the loss of her home. We see Leshwi and Moash connecting with and understanding one another. We learn of a history where singers were the original inhabitants of the planet. Parallel to this, Dalinar is having a truly excellent character arc about confronting one's past actions and acknowledging them to move forward and do better. I loved Oathbringer, for some years it was my favorite book, and I was excited as hell to see what came next. At the time, it seemed to me that there is a clear direction the story is going. Two books about needless war, and then a third where the main cast is forced to acknowledge the personhood of their enemies. This was so cool, all of my feelings from the previous installments were being validated, the characters were going to have to face what they've done in the past and outgrow their militaristic mindsets, I was so sure of that.

Imagine my disappointment when that does not even remotely resemble the direction the story went in Rhythm of War. RoW presented a clear, straightforward “us vs. them" narrative, where every character was totally fine with killing singers. Characters aligned with the singers were either flattened into wholly evil versions of themselves (Moash) or were expected to turn on their side in favor of the humans (Venli.) Because clearly there was no reason good people would be on the side that's all former slaves trying to stay free. Maybe there's some sort of accord or understanding between Navani and Raboniel that I might have found meaningful if the seeds of mutual understanding weren't already there in Oathbringer and then apparently ignored for a year by all the characters.

I have a lot of issues with how the listeners are handled in these books. (Here's some elaboration.) Following OB, I had thought that all my concerns were going to be addressed. Following RoW, I knew they never would be. 

Which is my main complaint, because that's the thread that matters most to me in this series.

I have a lot of other Things as well. Gonna just talk about a few big ones. 

One outsized source of disappointment that may seem a little petty, and which probably is, is that I felt mislead by the premise of the book. It had been announced that this book would center Venli and Eshonai, and I was unbelievably hyped for that. That did not really turn out to be the case. The purpose for their backstory chapters felt less about exploring them as people and contextualizing their arcs, and more about filling in gaps of world history. In the main plot, Venli was a POV character and she certainly played a role, but honestly not a very important one overall. To me she felt like a side character in her own book. I don't think it's controversial to say that the main character of RoW was Navani. A lot of people really like Navani and are happy about that. Unfortunately I'm not one of those people, and I found it all the more difficult to enjoy her when it felt like it was coming at the expense of some of my favorite characters. 

This particular gripe somewhat comes down to preference, obviously everyone prefers to read about characters they like more than those they don't, and it can go both ways. (For instance, on a craft/technical level RoW is probably the superior book to W&T, but I liked the latter a lot more because of my stupidly outsized attachment to Szeth and Nale.) But I do think there's something of a real criticism in how the book would rather focus on the feelings of a queen rather than those of a genocide survivor, and how the former's are given significantly more weight and import. It ties in with my main criticism, I think. 

And then there's how human/human racism had also been wholly cast aside as a plot point. Jasnah fixed slavery so that's resolved, and the only person who still cares about structural racism is the evil bad bad evil villain Moash/Vyre, who is now wholly irredeemable and who you're allowed to totally write off because he's sold his soul to Odium. I've already talked a lot about this. Other people have already talked about this, probably better than me. The writing was actually on the wall for me in OB, but again, RoW was when I fully accepted that this was never going to be addressed. 

There's something else that probably deserves its own discussion rather than being quickly tacked on at the end here, but here we are. This book changed how the series approaches war. 

In WoK, war was very clearly portrayed as a bad and inglorious thing. It was brutal, it was painful, those at the bottom died cruelly and unceremoniously and pointlessly while those at the top turned a profit. Every day was a new horror. The enemy were never evil, they were always just more people forced to go through the same thing. Through the next couple books, it felt to me that even if the characters had accepted war as necessary, there was still a tragedy to it. Conversely, in RoW (and W&T) war is basically a series of boss battles, in between which our protagonists can kill dozens of footsoldiers with barely a thought in the same way WoK had criticized.

Final note on all this, it sucks how we have no perspectives from the former-slaves-singers demographic. Those guys are really thrown under the bus, and seemingly get no self-determination now or ever. It was a glaring problem to me in RoW. Conscripted and enslaved humans and singers probably have just as much ground to form mutual understanding as a fused and a queen. (In fact they already had. In Oathbringer.)

In essence, RoW disappointed me because it left me with the distinct impression that none of the series's most important through lines (well, most important to me) were going to be resolved well. I liked W&T, but I haven't revised my opinion very much about the overall handling of these topics across the series. Maybe one of the reasons I was able to enjoy W&T so much more was because I no longer had such high expectations.

[reminiscentrainclouds]

You guys ever feel trapped? Yea I'm well-acquainted with the feeling of being trapped.

[msnihilist]

hi hello... I have a question for you... How do you get over someone who blocked you when your a fan of them...

I've been blocked by an artist in tiktok and on here they're names are boileddemon

I didn't do anything wrong... But i feel like they still saw my actions as wrong after they posted an anti proshipp saying they all should die

And I'm not an proshipper I'm more like a multishipper but i do respect someone's interest and hobby only if they don't force it on me

I have had a bad day since yesterday but it got worst when i they blocked me even i tried to defend proshippers

But i think they saw me as forcing my opinions on to them

Ever since now i've been in a bad mood

Im sorry if I'm venting on without your consent i..... Just feel like i wanna rip my flesh off my body and cannibal myself

Im sorry.. I'm really sorry if this question makes you uncomfortable and creeper out

I just want to talk to my favorite author

Im sorry...

Well, I guess my first piece of advice is to understand that the way you're feeling is borderline parasocial and you need to internalize that it's okay for people to block you for literally any reason.

It's okay to feel sad. Feelings are harmless and natural. But you need to take a deep breath, wallow in it for a bit if you like, and then let it go.

Because it really, truly, is not a big deal. And it sounds like this person who blocked you is a piece of shit, anyway.

Getting blocked online is perfectly fine and normal and good. Maybe you'd feel better if you blocked more frequently, as well. No one is required to interact with you, and the same is true in reverse — you're not obligated to interact with anyone, either, whether they're rude or post stuff you hate or just have bad vibes.

Get yourself a little treat, like your favorite ice cream. Then (respectfully) get over it.

[brisquad-unit-4402]

hello everyone 👋

i worry i've established a bad precedent with speaking on previous graduations; i want this blog to be a positive place without discussing these things, especially since i personally don't get upset about graduations. whatever you feel is valid and true, and you are allowed to have those emotions. all i ask is that you take care of yourself and avoid the things that may upset you further.

that being said, i have a lot of ideas, requests and wips for ike. i've never felt comfortable writing for graduated livers, but i know that there are plenty of others who are still interested in writing for his character.

i'll be posting all my ike content in its unfinished state, plus further notes from me on what i had planned for them. everyone can read what i've written and interact with it. in fact, if any artists, writers, roleplayers, or other creatives gets inspired by it, feel free to use them. if you post them here on tumblr, feel free to @ me, i would love to see what you've done!

THIS DOES NOT INCLUDE AI.

i don't care if it's personal use, do NOT plug my writing into ai. numerous livers have expressed how much they hate ai art and writing, this blog has always been against ai scraping fanwork without consent.

...had to get that out, thank you for bearing with me.

you have my permission to use my ideas, wips, and requests as long as it isn't ai. you can also use them for other characters than ike eveland. these can be published, for personal use, etc... really, the only rules are

no ai, full stop, no exceptions

if you're inspired by requests with a url: please ask the original requester for permission.

on that note i'm sorry to every request i can no longer complete. i feel awful knowing that the requesters and i were excited over ideas i can no longer finish, especially for how long they've been in my inbox. you have my deepest apologies.

feel free to ask me any questions about this, but please avoid asking me about my thoughts on the graduation itself, and please refrain from venting on my posts. be sure to check my rules before doing so, i've amended them a bit so everyone can stay comfortable on my blog.

once i'm done clogging up my blog i'll make a list of all the ike stuff i wanted to write here, then add this post to my masterlist. additionally, if you post anything based on any ideas/wips/requests feel free to reply/reblog this post specifically with a link to your post. i would love to feature them on this post with credits to you.

thank you, everyone, for reading this far, with both this post and with my blog as a whole. this post was difficult to make as well as the following, but i am honored to have known my oshi. i will cherish every memory i have of his stream, and i will always wish him well no matter where he goes from now. he's always been an inspiration to me beyond fandom. i'll always be honored to be one of the quilldren.

always do what you love and extend that love to each other 💛

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

unit 4402's ike wips

nsfw fics are marked with 🖤

༻✧༺ first kiss wc: 224

༻✧༺ secret relationship wc: 132

༻✧༺ ike and pet names wc: 855

༻✧༺ eki in a maid dress wc: 611

༻✧༺ laying in ike's lap wc: 315

༻✧༺ ike walking in on you wc: 549

༻✧༺ 🖤 ike and electrostimulation wc: 958

༻✧༺ 🖤 all of my remaining ike ideas wc: 585

༻✧༺ the sequel for stars above your skin wc: 3.1k

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

✧. ┊ masterpost ✧. ┊ kofi

[hyperfixingfr]

Hey guys, just a quick warning on the user makiyaaaahm who you may have seen in the tags recently with disturbing content (disclaimer; do not harass, just report + block)

There's a kid below the age of Tumblr usage (11 years old) going around the fandom and posting disturbing content that depicts them and glorifies them as a murderer that they are posting untagged. I attempted to speak to them about how this behavior is unacceptable and hurting people, but they spent the entire time shouting at me venting to me about how they're so mentally ill and can't help but draw themselves as a glorified killer, before proceeding to deny that they were venting to me or glorifying themselves as a murderer. It really disgusted me as someone who is mentally ill because this isn't acceptable behavior in a fandom with such a demographic that NEEDS to have this sort of content tagged. I tried to tell them that this was unacceptable and they can't deny responsibility for how they're hurting other people just because they're mentally ill and that they need to get help and find ways to heal so they aren't suffering anymore, but eventually they blocked me because they didn't want to listen. The behavior they displayed and the way they spoke to me was really disturbing and I worry about this kid being engaged with on here. Please just block and report them. I tried my best to push them towards getting help but like I said, they blocked me. If you want to send them resources so they can get help I wouldn't be against it but otherwise don't engage and just simply report and block. I don't like knowing that someone this unstable is online at SUCH a young age and I really want you guys to steer clear of this person so they aren't negatively influenced any further. I can't force them offline and I don't intend to, but they really shouldn't be here if they can't even come into a social space without spewing out triggering and glamorized material of horrific topics into a kids fandom. Really, they shouldn't be here given their age. They're not stable. Someone else (who also isn't a good person but we won't get into that) seems to have told them off as well in asks but that didn't get through to them either. I only said something because I got a direct notification of them reblogging something with disturbing text.

And before the usual "why are you bUlLyInG a child" anon ask comes in... Children need to be held accountable and given appropriate consequences and I've already held them accountable. They openly admitted to not wanting to do anything about this with excuses so the best option for consequences that aren't unfair or rude is to make sure people aren't engaging with them until they stop with their extremely harmful behaviors. They don't get a pass for their behavior even with mental illness (as someone with mental illness) because there's a difference between struggling and acting on bad stuff + making others suffer. I would even excuse it if they had been like "omg sorry I was having a mental break" but they only tried to defend themselves having done it by being like "I'm just mentally ill I can't help it" lol. And again children need to be held responsible for their actions or else they grow into adults who think they can do whatever they want

[waterfallofspace]

Little personal/rant/vent thingy under cut, real life stuff so feel free to skip over, just need a place to put it~ <3

had a 'situationship' (hate the term but.... what else can I call it T-T) thing end in early october/november, and... honestly I was doing pretty good with it all, but then the Lonely[tm] just kinda struck and-

man idk, sometimes it's just hard to be alone~ I am usually pretty good at it honestly, I try to find good friends and hold them close, find communities I fit into and interact in there, spend time with family, etc etc, but I am quite an anxious person, and ever since moving (leaving my only 2 irl friends behind) i almost never leave the house unless it's to go somewhere with family- yeah I just, feel the alone a little more lately~

I think partially bc that situationship was the first time I had an online friend visit, the first time I had anything close to a partner in person, first time I got cuddles, first time I had someone induce for me irl, first time for a lot of those things, the biggest one I can't get out of my head being having someone cuddle/share a bed. Just waking up to them there, or having them fall asleep hugging my leg or arm... memories I thought I was mostly over, that are starting to burn again~

yeah uh- all in all, just a bit lonely <3 and i have good friends, I do, but recently a few of them had a bit of a falling out, and my main two are getting married to each other, and already starting to form their own life that I'm less a part of [which is so fair, but I can't help feeling a bit left behind.. <3] so it's all been a bit much, and I've just....

well! this is my post so I'm gonna just say it! I've been missing having someone I can just go to and be like Hey. Let's just sit together and listen to music and watch videos and do some fun lil snz things together, just get our minds off the world and just Exist in Our Space with Just Us. Didn't realize how nice I had it with them, and didn't realize how much I'd be missing it <3 not just the snz stuff obviously, but honestly!!! i miss that too. they were not only so sweet and open about it, making me feel so safe, but dammit they were adorable~

cried like hell when they flew home, kinda knew this was gonna be a once in a lifetime experience with them, even though we didn't really say it out loud, it hurt for awhile, stopped hurting, thought it was over, pain came back~ guess I should listen to what I've been telling my other friends, grief [of any kind] comes in waves~

anyways if you made it to the end of this, uh- I'm sorry?~ and thank you, genuinely <3 even if you don't say anything or like this, just kinda- I know I read others vents like this sometimes and just feel a bit bad with nothing to add, but sometimes it just helps to know the words don't just exist in your own brain, that maybe others have seen them too, so if you just read this and nothing else, thank you <3 truly~

[yunoteru4ever]

Things I've been meaning to read and/or post about Sakae Esuno/Future Diary but haven't yet, because time makes fools of us all

This post is probably more of a means for me to vent my own guilt RE: "why haven't I done these things yet?!" than anything.. and maybe if I'm lucky, this will motivate me to actually work on some of them. But I guess we'll see. Sorry in advance.

I posted this giant "part 1" of an intended, even-larger Big Order review ages ago (literally almost 15 months now!) but Part 2 has become this... absolute monstrosity. It's become clear to to me that trying to actually list or even summarize the differences between the Big Order manga and anime is like trying to wrap your arms around the sun. The separation points are so massive that it's partly fused with infinity, and that has become such an imposing task that is also being written for a relatively small audience that I think I need I need to seriously change my approach. I have a "Draft" saved that's huge and has barely scratched the surface, but I think I should grind that down to some simpler, more generalized descriptions before continuing. And the other part of that is that it's now been so long since I read the series that I probably need to do it again as I progress through the differences! OOOOF.

I really want to talk more on here about the Great White Whale of untranslated Sakae Esuno manga and his last original series, The Detective Akechi is Berserk! It deals with a teenage girl who has dreamed of becoming a detective who gets forced into an awkward/uncomfortable partnership with her hero, the deceased Detective Akechi, who can possess her to speak through her and who also suffers from some post-mortem madness. I think the series suffers a bit from having a lot of fanservice (the first kind) in its first volume — not that we haven't seen stuff like that from Esuno before, just that it seems to be heavier/more frequen there — and I haven't personally read past Volume 1 yet. From just flipping through the pages, it does appear to drop the fanservice trend partway into the second volume? I didn't see any of that stuff in the back half of volume 2 or in volumes 3 and 4... but again, I haven't actually READ any of them, because that will require translation work on my end, and @sunniedesi's comments on the series in this post seem to indicate that maybe the trend DOES continue in some warped-ass ways. What I can tell y'all so far is that this is closer to Hanako and the Terror of Allegory than it is to either Future Diary or Big Order. But of course, I love all THREE of those mangas, so it's not like I consider leaning towards Hanako's storytelling style to be a bad thing. Sadly, the only scanlation online is of the very first chapter... the series as a whole remains widely out of reach, so I'd really like to work on either translating it (which would be a massive undertaking) or at least generally summarizing it so I can talk about it more in the larger context of Esuno's ouvré.

Hey, guess what ELSE I still haven't read up until now??? The damned Future Diary PSP game!!! I've held out hope for too long that someone would actually patch the translation into the game proper so I could experience it as intended, but... it seems like that project is likely very dead or, at best, going to take very long to see the light of day. I've actually started to look into how that kind of thing is done myself in the hopes that maybe I could do some of the work on my end, but... it looks like a LONG uphill climb of programs/code to understand before I could pull anything off. So it's high time I stop living in denial, stop putting it off, and finally read @sunniedesi's translation of the text. It's only been just sitting there waiting for my eyeballs for TWO FUCKING YEARS, after all.

[wayfayrr]

So this is very much a self indulgent mini-fic, venting about some stuff that I've been dealing with recently <3 I'm working on requests and some other fics but I got told to post this to get it off of my chest anyway @cloudninetonine @angry-trashcan thanks for the confidence boost to be able to post this

“Hey, you’ve been sitting over here for a while, you feeling alright?”

“Just been thinking… I was part of some drama before I was uh brought here. It’s just, it’s just messed with me a bit I guess. I’ll be fine when we need to start moving again, don’t worry wars.”

After a brief second of fabric shuffling, he sits down and leans on me. It’s an oddly comforting feeling, different too like he’s bothered by something? What could’ve set him off so badly?

“Would you mind if I asked you about it? It’s clearly bothering you so, you should get it off of your chest and well, I’d just like to help you through this.”

“If you really want to know, it’s a little complicated though and while I can make a lot of it make sense to you I’ll have to leave a couple of things out.”

“Sounds like you’re willing to get it off of your chest though, so would you care to explain it to me honeybee?”

He’s being more persistent than usual too, have I really been looking so badly bothered by my thoughts? The worry does feel nice however, it feels more like talking to an old friend than anything which is wonderful seeing as I’ve not been able to reach them recently. I’ve just been stuck rereading old messages in a new context while my phone endlessly buffers to reach impossibly far servers.

“It’s… I’d been having issues with this person for a while… they used me more than anything, kept asking me for advice and making everything about them and brushed anything I or my other friends were trying to say off and sent things they really shouldn’t to people unwarrented… and then everything else.”

“Everything else? You don’t have to cut yourself off, with how you’ve been acting the rest feels like it’ll be worse anyway.”

“They just - someone connected some dots and pointed them out to me and I just… I’ve been going back over what they said and - and - and it made me think. They told me they associated my voice with a character they always got weird over, they kept fawning over my accent and how they’ve only ever heard it in fiction before, they gave me weird compliments when I was talking about things I did as a kid and that’s not even getting me started on how they treated my friends. I just… I feel so disgusted, seeing it in this light. Every bit of my skin just itches with disgust towards myself. Sorry I didn’t mean to share so much at once - I’m just tired. They didn’t even like me, it was like they only wanted me for where I’m from.”

The way he stilled sent a shiver down me, did I say to much? He might have not meant it when he said I could share… I mean theres no way he could’ve known… or does he think I’m simply overreacting? I’m probably just overreacting anyway.

My heart started beating again when he softened and pulled me to rest on him.

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that all. They’re the one who is disgusting, not you, never you. I’ll speak to time, you should just rest for the rest of the day. I can lend you my scarf and you can just have a nap or I could ask wild to make your favourite food and you can just rest.”

I didn’t get a say before he’s already draped it over my shoulders; he’s leading me back over to the others and setting me down next to sky as he goes to speak with time. 

“Hmm? Did something happen, are you feeling alright dove?”

“Ah well, wars is going to ask time if we can stop for the day because I’m just dealing with some memories. I hope it won’t bother the others.”

“I doubt it, everyone’s been tense and tired recently. I know I have, I’ve been about dying for a rest. Would you care to join me too?”

Leaning back against him is all the response he needs as my eyes flutter closed, he’s so warm and comfortable. There are few people I’d prefer to rest next to. 

><><><><><><

“So then old man, I think that’s a good enough reason to settle for the day, don’t you?”

I know he’ll agree, asking him like this is simply a formality. After all, how could we continue when a member of the group is in such a state? On the verge of tears just from thinking about someone for a little bit too long. 

“You’ve never asked this for anyone else, but fine.” “Thank you Time, I’ll pay you back for this.”

“And Wars?”

“Hmm?”

“Go take your anger out on something, it’s not a good energy in the camp. Not if they’re so fragile right now. There’s apparently a standard bokoblin camp just a little south.”

He’s seen right through me then, but now I don’t need an alibi for when I come back.

[fuck-customers]

Ok on one hand, I like to get to know my coworkers. It's nice to actually know who you work with rather than just going "idk that person is wearing our uniform, they must work here or else they stole a uniform" But don't prevent me from doing my job and causing the manager to bitch ME out because YOU wouldn't stop following me around.

There's a newish cashier who I've talked to like twice (and only brief hi how are you shit) who seems to think that we're bffs now. Now I don't mind the occasional conversation with a coworker, but she clocked out and then hung around me for an hour after her shift ended. Plus she was venting to me about how much she hates our one boss and I agree with everything she said 100% except....THAT SAME BOSS WAS STILL ON THE FLOOR WITHIN EARSHOT. And I'm trying to politely tell her I have customers and I start ringing the customers up and she backs off only long enough for me to finish the line then starts following me and talking nonstop again.

Then the manager wanted me to stock in between customers, which is difficult enough, because I'm not tall enough to see over the shelves to see if I have a customer and is made worse by having to babysit some girl I barely know. And the manager gets mad at me for "socializing" when I she could clearly hear me tell the girl that I have work to do.

Just...ugh. I don't want to tell her to fuck off, because that would cause more problems than it would solve, but I politely told her multiple times "I have customers and I have to stock this stuff, I don't really have time to talk, I'm sorry" and "I've got a line, I have to deal with these customers and then finish stocking." and she just was Not Getting It. Idk if this is her first job or what, but she's been here 6 months and should know better by now.

I know this makes me sound like a raging bitch, but I truly don't mind talking to coworkers, just make sure it's the appropriate time and place, such as after or before we're clocked out/in in the breakroom. Or even if I was off the clock and she ran into me on the floor, that would be fine. Not while I'm on the clock and have customers and an assignment to do.

Posted by admin Rodney

[damnfandomproblems]

Re: 8224

Sometimes, I go on anon because I'm not comfortable opening myself up to harassment. The vast majority of people who reply to stuff here seem to be levelheaded, but lately I've been seeing a lot of people read things that weren't stated/implied, and they go off the rails on an assumption. At least if they somehow read one of my anonymous statements wrong, they can't dogpile on me unless I admit off anon that I sent the ask.

I just wish that sometimes people would reread the thing they were upset about so they could go "oh okay actually that statement DIDN'T say the thing I thought it did". But we're all only human and mess up sometimes, I suppose. Sometimes original posters aren't as clear as they could be, and sometimes people aren't as clear in their replies. Regardless, I don't like getting myself in the middle of messy debates, so that's why I prefer to go anon.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

Including an additional anon reply to the same problem:

Anon:

Conversations via ask box are a staple on blogs like this, are they not? This is a venting blog. Problems are posted anonymously from the get go because even submitters don't want to draw attention to themselves, it's a space to yell into the ether and then retreat without scrutiny. If you're somehow okay with that, but you take issue with people responding to those problems on anon, sorry but that's a little hypocritical. And I'll just point out that you, yourself, submitted your problem on anon and you didn't come out and provide your own url. So that's definitely going to raise my eyebrows.

And as a mod I feel I should weigh in, I have no problem handling anon replies the way I have been doing. But I do feel sometimes as if people get so used to submitting them this way that they may forget that comments and replies are available. I do hope people at least ask themselves if a reply really needs to be sent as an anon message or if it can just be a comment, (since I'm sure trying to follow these conversations backwards one link at a time can get confusing) but if that answer ends up being yes, no matter the reason, the inbox is fine. These anons do bring up good points that there are people online who have a tendency to interpret completely harmless comments in the most uncharitable ways, so I don't blame people for feeling worried about attaching their username even to benign replies.

Having said that, I don't think I've ever clarified my preferred format for replies. If you're replying directly to the original Fandom Problem post, all you need is the corresponding Fandom Problem number. You don't need to include a link to the post. If you are responding to another response, including the full webpage link is helpful. I can easily copy it and include the link in the post. I don't really know why people started only including the number sequence portion of the web page link, but it is my least favorite way to receive these replies since it usually includes copying, opening a new tab, pasting, then copying the full link to include it in the post. Which is of course doable, but makes things trickier so I prefer to handle these when I get home to my desktop, whereas the others are easier to post with my phone no matter where I am, so it may mean these replies have a slight delay compared to others.

I don't expect that everyone will adhere to these, but just in case it makes any difference.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - April 19th

parallel line anon (new), bad memories anon (new), dan anon, support anon, exception anon (new)

parallel line anon

Cas, im so tired. Im so unbelievably tired. My parents have no idea whats happening with me and they dont care to ask hey whats wrong fucking ever. So basically ive had a shit day and week.

(The rest is redacted)

hi <3

I completely understand why you're tired. I get it. People are awful, bigotry is getting worse, and I can;t even imagine growing up in that environment right now. I hope you know you have a safe space here to vent and to talk to someone.

Do you have any safe people to talk to irl?

___

bad memories anon

hey Cas!

So Ive missed tumblr a lot (I took a pretty long break) and I came back woo but I made the mistake of going through my older posts and wow. bad memories.

I don't think I realised how bad my mental health used to be until I saw them and it obviously made me really upset. I don't know what to do because I like tumblr and I missed but now all i can think about is all that stuff.

I think I'll stick around but I sort of just needed to get this out yk.

Hope you have a wonderful day!

Hi! Welcome back!

I mean I think it depends on why you came back--if you came back for the content and community, could you make a new account? That way you have a fresh start from the past?

If you came back for specific people, could you see if there's other ways to contact them?

If you are attached to this account, could you delete your old posts?

I think it also depends on what the memories are, and how much they trigger you. Like you have to decide what's best for you, you know?

<3

___

dan anon

(dan anon) For the anon advice ask:

I really am having a regulus-like experience today.

More often than not i guess but still. Basically i liked this guy from my class, let’s call him James…today he basically, rejected me. He told me, he doesn’t want to go anywhere with me and to leave him alone, because when i (as this regulus-type person) talk to him, others annoy him for being gay.

My interpretation is, that now i am the problem. Which shouldn’t be…but i feel like one, when it is, clearly ‘thanks to me’

…my life feels like fanfic material, anyway, carpe diem.

hi, it’s me again (regulus-type-experience anon)

a little update after a few hours…it is not as bad as i thought. though i still feel like i am drowning in my own thoughts. my experiences are still fanfic material and i feel that i can never get rid of these experiences. honestly it’s only safe to say that this is where i started with writing, it’s just that now i don’t feel motivated enough to write. basically writers block.

Most of my problems come from the fact , i have yet to realize, that i can not save everyone. then i also spiral into my own thoughts of selfless-ness

Hi <3

Ugh, I can;t even imagine how much this hurt. I know its hard, but try to remember that it sounds like it's not personal. He's working through his own issues and they have nothing to do with you. Plus, you deserve someone who wants to show you off, you know?

As far as writing, could you just write down your experiences, and focus on turning them into something more clear-cut later? Like just get the thoughts out for now?

Sending love!

___

support anon tw: death

hi <3

I am so incredibly sorry about what happened. I feel like when shocking things like this happen it just completely tears your heart out in a way that you can never fully recover from. But what you said about having to be okay-- no you don't. You can share her memories and still mourn. You can be devastated and still support your family. You deserve to work through your grief just like everyone else.

Do you want to tell me more about her? If you want to talk, I'd love to hear.

I'm sending you a thousand hugs (if you want them)

___

exception anon

hi cas!

i'm really confused. basically, i am straight. i've been straight my whole life. never questioned it. never found girls attractive, only guys. i can't imagine thinking about a girl in a romantic way, whereas with guys i definitely can. i've had multiple boyfriends, who i genuinely liked, etc etc etc.

but it's just that i like my best friend. a lot. and she's a girl.

so obviously, i'm not straight, which is really interesting. but i just can't make sense of my feelings! like, when i first met her, if you'd have asked me "would you date her" i'd say no. no. duh. i don't like girls. but recently - i don't know. she's just so cool. she's funny, she's smart, but not a try-hard or a braggart, she's pretty and confident, but she doesn't flaunt it. she's nice, but she's not a pushover and she's not fake. and god sometimes i look at her and have to talk myself out of kissing her right then and there. what????

i'm just so confused because - and this isn't me being in denial! i was raised by accepting parents, my friends are all lgbtq+ or allys: i'd be totally fine with not being straight - i genuinely do not like girls like that. i don't. it's just how it is; i have never once looked at a girl in that way and even recently, i still don't. i still can't imagine myself with a girl - except for, well, her. and i still like guys, still find them attractive - so wtf is this????

is there a sexuality that's like, straight but an exception for only one person??????

sending love <3

Hi!

Okay first, just a reminder that everything will be okay <3

I think the thing is, in my opinion, the terms 'straight' and 'gay' are like....very clear-cut, when a lot of people are more fluid than that. There are a LOT of people like you, who might mostly be attracted to one gender, but have a SLIGHT attraction to another gender, or who have an exception or two. And I think whether or not that affects how you identify is entirely up to you! I think also what you decide to do with it is up to you!

I'm sure there's a label for this, though I don't know what it is, but just know that whatever label you use, if you use any, should be what's comfortable for you. Just know that you're definitely not alone, and whatever you decide to do about it is valid, as long as you're kind to yourself <3

[call-me-copycat]

I just updated my "Will Not Write" section of my pinned post but I'll say it here anyways since I'm sure no one really reads it;

Please please please do not ask me to write the EraserMic family dynamic. The fanon creation where Aizawa and Hizashi are the adoptive parents of Shinso and Eri? That one

My reasoning and personal stuff underneath

I know with how much I like Aizawa and Shinso that most would probably automatically assume that I like it - as much as I love the creativity of the fandom, I think that its so far off canon that its something entirely new

There are tons of stuff like that in fandoms, such as AUs, and as a writer I adore seeing so many people shape their favorite characters into their own styles. However, just like I'm not really a fan of certain AUs, I'm not a fan of this dynamic

I can't explain it. It just gives me the ick. I guess it's just a little uncanny, just too unfamiliar for me. It's a little silly, I know

That being said, I hate to admit it but please don't request Aizawa adopting/fostering/caring for Eri either. I'm no good at writing Eri, and I have a sort of love-hate feeling when it comes to her.

I grew up in different foster homes. Parents typically preferred younger, cuter kids. When I got just a little older I was always pushed off to the side for the next cuter little girl. This neglect happened for years. That deeply affected me even to this day, so as an adopted child that was put through the horrors of terrible foster homes, Eri brings up a lot of negative emotions in me. Especially upon seeing my favorite character, Aizawa, be headcannoned to adopt her - something I wished for as a kid for years.

I dunno. It's childish, it's silly, and it's something I'm working on. I actually tried writing her in one of my favorite series just so I can start to see her in a positive light. But as of right now, no adoption stuff unless it's the reader being the one adopted please.

In the entire time I've had this blog, I've read every single request that has been sent to me, and I've denied none. I don't actually plan to deny any of them no matter the content

However there is 1 that I'll need to. I'm sorry to whoever sent the request, but I can't write it. It's a request that was sent to me asking for Aizawa and Mic taking care of Eri. I've tried but I just can't bring myself to write it :⁠-⁠( (Also I recommend looking at my rules, there's not many but I strictly write "x-reader" only)

I'm not picky with requests in the slightest (I'll take whatever I can get really), however this is the only thing I draw the line at.

I don't like to vent or trauma dump on here as I prefer keeping things light-hearted, but I feel that you all were owed an explanation at least

I'm sorry for the inconvenience, please have a lovely day ( ´･ω ก` )

[lilacs-echoing]

sorry for the amount of bpd posts, i split really hard and have been having frequent episodes. i might get a tagging system so my account is less of a mess and people can ignore the vent reblogs but these last few months are kicking my ass symptom wise.

happy 16th to me tho. i made it this far and it feels fucking amazing. i finally feel this week like I've got good stuff coming back around and that it will only take a little time for me to feel better again. however this splitting episode has me physically ill i think, idk im theorizing its a mix of disability and psychosomaticism gmrrbhtghh rambling rambling. tomorrow will be better but some days I've just got.. so much happening RAAHHH being 16 and having a severe mental disorder guys sorry ik i have a reputation for being a crazy bitch!

[doumadono]

Emergency request:

Hey I hope it's okay if I request some comfort with Hawks. I've had struggled for a long time now never really telling anyone even though I have had times where I got anxiety/panic attacks almost daily. Mostly because of some family issues and having to had been safe place and supporter for both my younger siblings and a mother. (there has happened a lot but I won't go to any specific details) It was both freeing and terrifying to have moved on my own since I felt like I had in a way less responsibility havig to just look after myself and do what I want. But I also felt anxious of not really knowing what's going at home and feeling like I wasn't really needed anymore. Not really getting many calls to ask how I was doing or if I do it quickly becomes a 'rant' of what's going on in their life, even though it's much better now than few years back.

I'm finally getting help and send a text to my school psychologist because I have been pretty exhausted about everything building up and not really attending to school either. But I'm proud for finally going to talk there and hopefully getting some more help. I'm just anxious of how no one really knows how much I have been struggling and thinks I'm doing well and I don't know how I'm going to face them telling them if I can't continue school at this moment.. Meaning I would have to break the illusion of how I really am.. I'm just used to keeping it inside but I'm trying to break out of that.. but it's scary xd

I'm sorry for the long explanation I don't mean to vent I'm bad at summarizing stuff. There's absolutely no pressure to write this and I wish you have an amazing day! I wanto say I really love your blog and all your amazing writings!❤️

A/N: I apologize for posting this after the 48-hour emergency request window; I've been quite busy recently. I want you to know that reaching out for help is a brave and significant step. You don't have to carry this burden alone, and it's okay to break the illusion. Your well-being matters, and I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself. It may be scary, but you're on the path to healing, and there's strength in vulnerability! Keep moving forward, and things will get better ♥

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST

Hawks had always been known for his swiftness, both in the skies and in his hero duties. But today, as he received your message and read through the turmoil you'd been enduring, he realized that some things couldn't be rushed. He knew that your struggles had been hidden beneath a brave facade for far too long. As he flew toward your place, he used a few of his feathers to discreetly check in on you. They slipped through the slightly ajar window, silently sensing your distress and heavy sighs.

You sat alone, enveloped in the suffocating embrace of your inner demons; your apartment dimly lit, and your heart heavy with the weight of your struggles. The room was filled with a haunting silence, only broken by the occasional distant sirens of the city.

When he finally landed on your balcony, and knocked gently, you were startled, not expecting him to actualy show up. Opening the balcony door, his wings cast a shadow over you. His usually confident demeanor was replaced with an air of solemnity.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, both surprised and touched by his presence.

He gave you a soft, sympathetic smile and stepped inside. "I read your message, and I couldn't just ignore it. You really thought I won't check upon you, songbird? Can I come in?"

Nodding, you led him to your living room, where you both settled on the couch. The weight of your troubles hung heavy in the air, and Hawks knew he needed to tread carefully. "I know this might be difficult," Hawks began gently, "but you don't have to carry this alone anymore. You can talk to me, whatever it might be about."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you finally allowed yourself to speak, the words spilling out like a dam breaking. You shared your anxiety, panic attacks, and the overwhelming sense of responsibility for your family's well-being.

Hawks listened intently, his red wings folding around you protectively as you poured out your heart. "You don't have to hide your pain. It's okay to be vulnerable."

"But what if they see me differently now since I moved out?" you whispered, fear lacing your voice. "What if they think I don't care about them anymore? What if they'll consider me weak if I tell them about my school?"

Hawks leaned closer, his feather-light touch soothing. "Strength isn't about never feeling weak. It's about facing your vulnerabilities and seeking support when you need it, even if you're a pro hero. And believe me, there's nothing weak about that. About the situation with your family - I'm sure they'll finally accept your decision about moving out. Give them time and with small gestures show them that you still care."

As you continued to talk, Hawks offered reassuring words, his presence a comforting anchor in the storm of your emotions. He spoke of his own struggles, sharing stories of the pressure and loneliness that came with being a hero. Hawks gently brushed his feathers against your cheek, a gesture filled with tenderness. "You're not alone in this, okay? I'll be here for you whenever you need me, and I'll support you through the tough times."

Tears streamed down your face as you gazed at him, grateful for his understanding. "Thank you, Keigo. I don't know what I would've done without you today."

He smiled softly, his golden eyes reflecting genuine care. "Anytime, kid. Remember, you've got wings of your own, and you can soar through anything."

[sarcastictissy]

Hola :D I just wanted to thank you for being so positive lately and looking at things regarding the qstudio situation with nuance. It feels like people have been so stressed and angry after all of the admin stuff came that they began to take every bit of news we hear as some sign that bad things are to come . I think a lot of people underestimated just how long this process can take, there a lot of factors to be considered here, including: q's lack of experience, the union, the laws, the admins. And unfortunately there is no way to satisfy everyone when it comes to stuff like this. This was never going to take a week or two, I feel like people didn't fully understand that.

Some admins are going to be pushed out of the project due to the lack of funds and the fact that this is a legal issue first and for most. It's unfair but it's the law. Not everyone understands that and because of that people are going to say things without understanding the situation. Not every thing is black and white and sometimes things aren't going to work out the way we want them to. Nobody is perfect and we shouldn't expect people involved in this situation to act like that. Which is why you should always look at the situation from multiple perspectives before forming an opinion.

It makes me feel tired to see the same takes over and over agian with no nuance. So your post have really helped me feel better :) I've seen people from both qsmpblr and qsmptwt act like every ccs involved in this is a war criminal or like this is a admins vs quackity or french/brazil vs quackity. It's kinda drove me off most social sites and forced me to only watch YouTube and stuff (on the good side of things, I've been watching quackity's discord videos and some dsmp vods :D it's been fun)

What I am trying to say is that, scrolling through your blog feels like a breath of fresh air and has made me feel 8× more calm about this situation. I don't think doomposting is necessarily bad but after seeing so much of it, sometimes you just need to distance yourself and look at the good parts of life. No matter how much I complain, I am never changing the course that qstudio is headed and neither can any one else, The only one who can do that is quackity. I hope that he does the right thing and the studio gets better. I love the characters that qsmp has brought us and the community it has formed, qsmp is a beautiful project that I want to see thrive. For now the only thing I can do as a viewer is hope for the best <3

I'm sorry if this came off as a trauma dump, I just really wanted to thank you.

So, this has been in my askbox for a while because I was so grateful and happy to hear I've helped someone!! Thank you sm anon that means a lot to me and knowing I'm keeping others optimistic, helps me feel optimistic too! :D

This is a very complex situation with so many moral grey areas mixed with black and white. It's not simple, it's not easy. These things cannot be fixed in a matter of weeks, you're absolutely right about that.

I also agree doomposting isn't necessarily bad! It's a good way to get off some steam and vent/ rant for a bit. There's nothing wrong with that. We all need it at times. For me, personally, it becomes toxic when that's ALL I'm seeing in social media. When I go on my phone and all I see is negativity, that's when I need to call it quits and start blocking people or start taking time away (which is why I deleted twt off my phone) everyone's tolerance levels are different ofc, so, not everyone is affected by that negativity, but I certainly was. This is why I want my blog to be positive and uplifting and you know what? Each and every time I get a ask or a message thanking me for that, I gain faith in humanity and it just encourages me to keep being positive! I'm so thankful for your ask and dw it wasn't trauma dumping at all!! :D I hope you're doing well anon! Take care of yourself. You matter