#Symptom Control
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When a character forgives another for doing some truly horrible things to them … especially if it’s because they know they’ve done worse things back (or even before that)
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Hospice care focuses on providing comfort and relief to individuals facing serious illness. It is designed to help manage pain and other symptoms in a compassionate, holistic manner. For families in need of this type of care, the services available can significantly improve the quality of life in challenging times.
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Allergy season can bring discomfort, with symptoms like sneezing, itchy eyes, and congestion affecting daily activities. For many, standard medications may not provide enough relief or come with unwanted side effects. Personalized medication plans offer a customized approach to managing allergies, helping individuals find effective solutions. A local pharmacy in Watkinsville, Georgia, provides tailored medications that target specific symptoms, offering more precise treatment options compared to over-the-counter products.
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Allergies can have a significant impact on overall health, often causing persistent symptoms that affect daily life. Neurology services in Ridgewood, New York recognize that allergic reactions trigger the immune system, leading to inflammation that can make the body more vulnerable to other illnesses.
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enough about the timeloop I wanna hear about the post-timeloop.
person who just got over the horror of being trapped and settled into a comfortable routine...but then the timeloop breaks and they struggle to reacclimatize. person trapped in a loop for years who grieved their loved ones—who are suddenly back and acting like nothing happened (because for them nothing did). teenager who aged physically and mentally during the timeloop and now they're so much older than they're supposed to be. random strangers who were trapped in a loop together relieved to get away from each other at last, but feeling oddly bereft of familiar company. service worker who is pissed as fuck to have to go back to work
#people who lost all impulse control during the loop bc hey nothing mattered#but now the loops over and suddenly there are consequences to their actions#person who was stuck in grind culture accidentally becomes used to leisure time bc hey there's not much work to do in a loop#but now it's over and they are abruptly thrust back into an 80-hour week schedule and holy shit did it always feel this fucking awful#person who was stuck for so long than now they can barely remember anything that happened in months leading up to the loop#they're stuck faking amnesia#which gets pretty awkward when school requires a doctor's note and now they're frantically googling head injury symptoms
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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Steve probably should have had surgery after Vecna died, because Hanahaki's roots seemed deep, but he chose to alternate between Max and Eddie's hospital rooms. There was no time to waste on his own health.
His parents were back this time. They had sold their house and bought a huge apartment for Steve, who wanted to stay in the city. His parents didn’t even question it, they just demanded his time for a week before leaving with a big hug and the promise of a trip somewhere nice that summer. If he had been a little younger, Steve would have been happier, but after so many years of neglect, all he could think was that this was as far as he was going to get.
A side note, an afterthought. They cared about their son, just not as much as they should have.
Steve's new apartment had four bedrooms, more than he needed, but he was glad his parents tried so hard to make up for it, because it meant he could offer Robin a room when she graduated and there would always be room for the kids. And Eddie and Wayne, who stayed with him while the government found them a new place to live.
Eddie made a joke about Steve's parents being more powerful than the government, for being able to find Steve a great place to live so quickly in a broken city while he and Wayne had to wait.
Wayne was usually around, and despite being a somewhat taciturn man, it was easy to see the love that overflowed for Eddie. It made Steve think of his mother, who had loved and suffered so intensely that she had developed Hanahaki.
And yet, she was not with him.
The cough got worse.
One day, Steve woke up in the middle of the night, struggling after yet another nightmare of torture. Some days, it was easy to forget about Vecna in favor of that hour beneath the Mall, with his life in someone else's hands. On days like these, Robin was needed more than ever, but her parents didn't want her away so much, so sleeping in his new apartment was hardly an option. Calling her wasn't a good idea either, because all it would do was stress her out and they'd end up up all night on the phone. So he resigned himself to taking medication and going out to the balcony, longing for the fresh, clean night air.
He would turn on the TV or music, but he didn't want to wake Eddie, so he just stood outside with his eyes closed and imagined being alone again when Wayne and Eddie left, then tried to imagine what the trip with his parents would be like, if it were to happen. Steve still wasn't sure if he wanted to go, but it might be nice. Maybe he'd get something out of being away from Hawkins for a while. Maybe the coast would make it easier to breathe.
As lost in thought as Steve was, after years of trauma it was impossible not to be aware of the sounds around him, so when Eddie opened the bedroom door and started walking down the hall, he heard it. He stayed silent, not wanting to disturb Eddie.
Of course, Eddie didn't care and showed up a few minutes later with some tea.
For your cough, man.
After that, it became almost a ritual between them. Eddie was always there when Steve woke up startled, and Steve reciprocated. They always had nightmares, so who went to who depended on which one of them woke up first.
Sometimes they would stare at the stars in silence, other times they would talk. Most nights, they would end up in Eddie's bed, in one of the spare bedrooms, without touching each other.
Steve's room, which was definitely his and not a temporary arrangement, felt too intimate.
At the same time, Eddie began asking more and more about Steve's throat, about his shortness of breath, if he was okay, when he planned to go to the hospital. The questions became so frequent that Wayne noticed, too.
The feeling of being cared for was too much. Feared and desired in equal measure.
Eddie shouldn’t even be doing all this, because he was still bandaged, still covered in pink scars, still had a long way to go in physical therapy.
For the second time in his life, Steve felt suffocated by love.
This time, Steve almost hated it. Because he was in love with Eddie, because Eddie didn’t know the things Robin knew. Even if he loved Steve back, how could Steve demand that Eddie take care of him?
Mr. Harrington had reasons to stay with Mrs. Harrington. Although no one talked about it, Steve was sure that his father had been the trigger for his mother’s Hanahaki. And maybe if she had never left, chasing her father across the country, trying to be happy with him to stay alive, maybe… Just maybe, Steve wouldn’t have been alone and maybe he would have been healthy.
Neither Eddie nor anyone else had a good reason to pursue any kind of happiness or emotional stability with Steve.
In addition to the burden of living with a chronic, progressive disease that would possibly become terminal at some point, being emotionally involved with someone with Hanahaki was very complicated. It required loyalty, responsibility, patience, a willingness to accept endless arguments and a desire to reconcile.
Communication was essential. Making sure the other person felt good and loved, comfortable and safe. All of this was too much work, too demanding.
Loving Steve was a prison.
I'll try to post part 3 soon. I've already written the ending, but I'm thinking about how to connect this part to the ending, which will be happy.
#It's Hanahaki#but a little different#More realistic#I guess#I always think about how#even though people have flowers growing out of their chests#they recover so easily and there are no major problems other than difficulty breathing#It's pretty absurd#I think it would cause massive damage to the entire body#But I like to think that a slow progression and symptom control would be a good thing to incorporate#Also#I think it would be possible to treat some of the complications#Maybe I'll do another post later#just to talk about some of the things I think about how Hanahaki could affect multiple organs#eddie munson#steve harrington#steddie#stranger things
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Hot take, anyone who thinks Dick Grayson has a persistent case of anger issues just doesn't know what anger issues are.
Does he get angry? Yes (I sure would hope so since he's a human being). Would I call it anger issues? No, not really.
#if you disagree please show me your evidence#because I keep seeing examples of 'anger issues' from Dick that are literally a common emotional response to a very damaging event#or straight up mental control#'anger issues' is not even a medical term#is just an underlying symptom to many different disorders#do we really think someone who has trouble managing their anger could ever become a trusted leader to multiple teams?#someone who people know they can rely on?#everyone has moments in which they find harder controlling their emotions because they're going through immense stress or anxiety#but that doesn't define you nor does it always mean it's part of a disorder#and I'm not saying dick grayson doesn't have any issues#nobody could lead his life and be completely mentally stable#but out of all the things I would think he has#an anger management disorder wouldn't be my first guess#dick grayson#nightwing#robin#dc comics#dc#dick grayson “anger issues”
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is it just fever related pain or am i also having a flare up and other awesome questions i am asking myself as i cant fall asleep because it feels like my body is falling apart
#i barely even have a fever anymore today and the other cold symptoms are also under control so im kinda assuming it's the latter/both#fibro
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so I think I may have pcos. or some kind of hormonal imbalance bc my period is so irregular (+ other symptoms) and has been since 2021. my current obgyn hasn't been taking this seriously, and my insurance only gives me one free appointment per year
I'm considering finding another obgyn (but it might be a pain) and scheduling w the one I already have will be easier
but I don't want to make another appointment where my concerns are dismissed
any advice
#yes sadly my obgyn is a woman#im not gonna get into the nitty gritty but i told her every symptom and shes dismissed it#she said it was normal for periods to be weird sometimes when ive literally had weird periods since 2021#she said we can watch it or try birth control#i really want someone to screen me for a hormonal imbalance or pcos or something but it seems like no one is considering that#so i may want to look for a new one
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when i was a child/teen/young adult i had a moderate case of OCD, and anyway one of the things it made me do was think "you are a bad person if anyone can hear you breathing" (lol) so i spent years training myself to breathe as shallowly as possible so that no one could hear me. which is obviously like. bad for your health. anyway unfortunately i was Very successful at this and so now i breathe in a deeply fucked way without even thinking about it, and i do not know how to reverse this process and train myself to breathe normal again. so it goes.
#my ocd is pretty much gone as it was a symptom of living in fucked up circumstances#it was the 'try to exery control over a life you have 0 control over' disease for me#but unfortunately its echoes remain#natalie does textposts
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Does anyone else who is Christian/was raised Christian feel like immense guilt about being hyperfixated on Conclave (2024) for no good reason or is that just me?
I gave full on context for post is in the tags so I’d recommend reading those
#I’m not Catholic. I have no desire to be Catholic. I am Methodist and was raised Methodist.#My entire extended family on my Mom’s side was though#And she was raised VERY VERY Catholic#We like to call it “Trickle down Catholic guilt” because even though I’ve never been Catholic I still ended up with the#same paralyzing guilt she still gets. Neither of us know how this happened.#Like it’s so bad I get physical symptoms (sweating/anxiety/even nausea sometimes)#Also just to put the icing on the cake: I’m not even that Christian. Like there’s no reason for it to affect me this much. I also can’t#control what I’m hyperfixated on so like.#Anyways this movie brings me so much joy and feeling actually understood in film it’s insane. I adore it so much.#Conclave#Conclave (2024)#vincent benitez#religious guilt#(For clarification by “not that Christian” I mean like I’m a believer and I pray but because I’m also a queer trans guy from Texas I’ve had#-a very complicated past with religion and I’m also just not the kind of person to bring up my religion if it’s not totally necessary. )
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“ The battle was glorious, my soul burned bright as the sun, and then I died. I died, my death was proven worthy, and yet I am trapped. Trapped and prevented from being reborn. From continuing the cycle of rebirth for which I am destined. My soul should never have been trapped inside my old flesh. I should never have been forced to become both rot and decay. I know not what manner of foul sorcery that cloaked man used on me, but I will find him. I will tear him asunder if I must. Whether or not the seal is broken, he shall not suffer to live. ”
― There have been an increasing number of reports from amateur hunters returning unsuccessfully, claiming an undead mark killing clan targets before its members can get to them as the reason for it.
More experienced hunters however have recently confirmed that this one is no mark at all, but rather a peculiar steppe warrior who is far away from home. The man tells little about himself or what his goals are, but introduces himself as Jargai Dotharl to those who are social enough to dare conversing for longer than a few minutes.
Hunters who come across Jargai have conflicting opinions of him. Some describe him as a formidable warrior who can take down even the most vicious of marks with only his own sword. Others claim that he is all but useless in a fight, dropping his weapon from the slightest bit resistance and collapsing on the ground while writhing from what looks to be incredible pain.
He accepts neither coin nor company for his feats, but rather trades in information exclusively. He reaches out for clues about a strange individual who he cannot describe in any manner of detail, and then gets irate and leaves when people inevitably don't know who he's referring to. He refuses to show anyone his face, covering it underneath a shroud at all times.
Truly not an easy individual to get along with, but most that interact with him will still conclude that he is overall a reliable fellow, all things considered.
Still, most people with sense keep their distance. While the vast majority of them would be unable to pinpoint why, there's no denying the strange air that hangs over him like a dark cloud.
Jargai prefers it that way. The dead and living have no business being friends with each other.
#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#ff14#final fantasy 14#au ra#xaela#ffxiv edit#ffxiv screenshot#ffxiv oc#gpose#gposers#ffxiv screenshots#ffxiv screenshot edit#dotharl#ffxiv oc lore#my screenshot#my edit#nabaath-areng#jargai dotharl#imma have to go back to previous posts of him and tag his name#but there....... him......#truth be told i didnt expect to write this it all happened in the post editor LMAO pardon me for any errors#i guess you could call him a vent oc. the concept is one i dipped my toes into 5 years ago ish#but then it came back like a tsunami as a result of my worsening health and the way that affected me mentally#and so jargai was born. poor little zombie dotharl trapped in his dead body against his wishes#ive always resonated heavily with the concept of decay and being undead. dead without death. living without life#no relief no reprieve. just trapped in a prison thats rotting from within outside your control#needless to say jargai is a bit personal to me LMAO. im basically just projecting nearly all of my own symptoms on him#a whole section of his doc is literally just a list of all his health issues as a result of him being undead#anyway tumblr removed my final tags so ill stop here and go into more detail another time xoxo
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Because my latest accidental interest is chemical weapons, and because all my interests end up infected with a Tolkien angle, I present to you this: the Nazgûl attacks as interpreted as a form of chemical warfare.
This lines up well both with the Nazgûl ability to inflict fear on a mass scale and with the impacts of the Black Breath. People don't necessarily know what they're facing or what's happening to them, but both the experience and even the threat of it are terrifying. It also allows the obvious evocation of WWI gas warfare, though not, say, accompanied by the physical effects of chlorine or mustard. The Black Breath has both psychological and physiological effects which require medical treatment, and this description I think could be applied essentially unchanged to instances of chemical warfare:
At length even the stout-hearted would fling themselves to the ground as the hidden menace passed over them, or they would stand, letting their weapons fall from nerveless hands while into their minds a blackness came, and they thought no more of war, but only of hiding and of crawling, and of death.
I also think it would be fun if athelas (which treats the Black Breath) was a member of the nightshade family (which includes sources of natural atropine, which can treat the effects of exposure to certain chemical agents). This would put the Black Breath in the second generation of chemical agents, maybe a type of organophosphate nerve gas
#nerve gas while not actually used in wwii did carry a lot of weight just via the fear/threat of its use#since you don't get all the physical burning/asphyxiation/blindness symptoms of wwi agents i suggest the black breath is either#a ''riot control'' level incapacitant or a military weapon level nerve gas. at such concentrations that it doesnt kill instantly per se#tolkien#lotr#nazgûl#chemical warfare#skravler
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gentle reminder that human health does not fit into a binary system and nothing is ever really fully a mental or physical disability
stress can have significant effects on physical health, more than you'd think
and the basis of any mental disability is still physical, that's why it's possible to develop medications for it
#salt baby talks#ignoring the fact that exclusionism is counterproductive to advancing any kind of disability agenda#the biology just straight up doesnt support it#neuroinflammation and things like increased cortisol levels are a big deal#they can affect any of my 'physical' disabilities#sometimes more than any other factor#and theres evidence of changes in the brain and the rest of the body with basically every 'mental' disorder#thats why we have things like SSRIs or antipsychotics#epilepsy is limited to the brain but this one is always physical#parkinsons is at its core a loss of dopamine in the brain#alzheimers has predominantly mental symptoms#yet we dont call that a mental disorder#and they are equally as disabling as physical conditions!#i would know#i have 'both'#and if you disagree#make your case and ill happily discuss this further#i do have to wonder if maybe undercutting this#is that same negative societal bias that occurs with things like depression and anxiety and PTSD#where people think you should just 'get over' it#that the logic is that 'physical' disabilities are MORE disabling because 'you can just get over mental disabilities'#which isnt true ftr most mental disorders are lifelong and chronic#people are deemed treated for a mental health condition when theyre subclinical or in remission or in control of their condition#not when theyve returned to 'normal' because its not going to happen#disability#chronic illness#ableism#mental health#and yes i am cognizant of the fact that when people say this they mostly mean mental health disorders like mood disorders#i phrased this the way i did because a) its mental health conditions that are usually the target of this and b) we can have meds for both
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guys please pray for me
#I don't know how to explain what's going on but I'm struggling and don't know how to get a handle on it#I think that there's two issues going on that are probably somewhat intertwined because I'm fixating on them as such#so maybe I need to separate out the one that is stupid and I shouldn't be fixating on it#and then just focus on the other thing as it is and not as a symptom of whatever else#idk but it's so weird and complicated that I just can't figure out how to explain it#and I've gone to my mom over stuff related to this enough lately so I won't again#idk I'm just. maybe I'm having a hard time because I'm so tired. I've been getting up early every day this week#and yet still can't fall asleep earlier so I'm not getting enough sleep I don't think.#I haven't had a break since friday#maybe that's part of it#bc I was fine for a while and then this week I'm fixating on what ifs and my own failures (that are somewhat out of my control#because I... don't know how to capture my thoughts while I'm literally mostly asleep? probably habit when I'm awake lol)#so i think there's a level of spiritual attack making me fixate and also just#tiredness#yeah.#anyway.#prayer request
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Seeing Astarion and thinking

#bg3#astarion#c-ptsd#ptsd#seriously im so happy they did such a good job#i barely ever see good ptsd rep in general#so many ptsd characters get killed off as a sort of 'happy ending' and i hate it#and the rep for CPTSD is even scarcer#ive seen characters who *should* have c-ptsd but the writers just stick them with symptoms for regular ptsd#and even when there IS rep they stay away from the difficult parts of it#the ugly parts#the anger and the hard parts of healing#people want the gentle pitiable version usually#but this kind of ptsd involves such an emphasis on control#lack of trust#emotional dysregulation#its not pretty. its rough. its...terrible#i cant describe how happy it makes me to see those parts tackled#and tackled SO well#and he can have a happy ending#even though he cant walk in the sun...in a way it makes it happier for me to see#i have so many injuries from my abuser that will never heal#but i have to live with it and accept it#astarion has to do that too#but it doesnt make him less worthy of love#it doesnt mean he isnt worthy of happiness or that its unattainable#idk im just...not used to seeing someone have the same condition as me#ive seen very few characters outside of bg3 who had ptsd#and most of them were killed off#and it was painted as a happy ending for them and it makes me sick to think thats what people see for people like me
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