#The Pits are not seperate from Jason

[bet-on-me-13]

Ellie wasn't born a Halfa

So! Jason just found something weird. Or rather. Someone.

A little girl, no more than 6 or 7, crying behind a dumpster in an alleyway. Now, as unfortunate as it is, this isn't that strange a sight in Gotham. Kids are always running away from home, getting lost, being left homeless after a mugging gone wrong, but this time was different.

Because the kid was glowing.

When he found her hiding behind the Dumpster, a medical gown being the only thing she had to protect herself from thr frigid Gotham Winter, he didn't hesitate to give her his Jacket and take her to his nearest safe house.

(Actually it took a little while to convince her to accept the Jacket, and even longer to get her to agree to being taken to his safe house, but they got there in the end.)

When he had finally gotten her set up in a side room of the Warehouse, with the most comfortable bed and thickest Blankets he could find, he tried asking what had happened.

"Daddy lied." She said. "He said he loved me, but then he made another kid and said he didn't care about me."

And, once again, it was unfortunately not that uncommon to see runaway kids from neglectful homes, but the way she said it raised some flags in his head.

"...and, how did you end up in Gotham?"

"I ran. He said I was a spare, and that scared me."

Well, that was even more horrible than he had anticipated. What kind of monster tells their kid that they're a spare?!

"And, I'm sorry if this is a touchy subject but why are you glowing?"

She just buried her face in the Blankets and shook her head.

"Alright then, that's fine. You can tell me when you're ready, or even not tell me at all, I'll accept either or".

For the next few weeks, Jason juggled running his newly created criminal empire and raking care of the kid. He still hadn't gotten a name out of her, but she said to call her "Dp" instead. 'It's the best I'm gonna get', he thought.

It was only after a few more weeks, right before he was about to begin his Plan of confronting Bruce about the Joker still being alive, that she approached him and agreed to tell him everything. He was actually really glad that she finally seemed to trust him enough to tell him.

"Okay Dp, you can start wherever you want."

"...well, I guess I should start with my name..." She started, "...or rather, my lack of one..."

"What?" Asked Jason in a soft voice.

"I, I don't have a name." She explained, "Daddy never gave me one. He just called me DP-2."

"...what do you mean by two?" Asked Jason.

"It-It's my Experiment Number." She said, stuttering a little, "I'm not a normal person, I'm a Clone. I was made to be daddy's perfect child, but I was just the test run. He said that I wasn't needed after he made DP-3, and that all I was good for was spare parts."

Jason felt his throat dry up. Dp was a Clone? Of who? Who made her? What right did that guy have to reject her?! Who in their right mind would make a Clone and then reject the Clone?! How dare he!

The Pits perked up

He felt the Pits rising a little, but managed to push them down. Dp needed support, not the Pits.

"It's Okay kid." He said, holding her had reassuringly. "It's perfectly okay to be different. I accept you as you are, and I'm sure as hell not gonna abandon you that easily. Or, ever really. You're stuck with me, whether you like it or not."

She giggled, and hugged him. A thoughtful look crossed her face, and she pulled away.

"There is one other thing...you know how I glow sometimes?" She asked.

The Pits felt a sense of dread

Jason felt like he wasn't going to like this. "Yeah?"

"Well, when I said I was meant to be a Clone, I never mentioned who of." She explained slowly. "He's a kid named Danny, and when he was 14, he had an accident where he died and came back as a Half Undead."

No...

Jason really wasn't liking where this was going.

"When Da-Vlad tried to make me, he realized that those powers couldn't be cloned..." She paused here, seemingly gathering the courage to continue. "...they needed to be added afterwards."

NO.

He didn't. He had better not have, for his own Fucking Sake, he had better not have done what Jason thinks he did.

"So one day, he took he down to the Lab, and he put me in a big machine." He voice broke a little. "He locked me in there, and then I think...that I died..."

...

For once, Jason felt completely in tune with the Pits. He was going to Kill that guy.

...

Sorry if this feels a little rushed, I kept going back to add or change parts of it.

Basically, Vlad realized that you can't Clone a Halfa. So, he made a workaround. He just stuck his first Viable Clone into a Portal, and let the machine Kill her. When he realized that it worked, he knew he had no use for Ellie anymore aside from spare parts.

And he told her as much, Vlad is a fucking asshole.

Ellie, of course, got scared and ran away. She ended up in Gotham, and was adopted by Jason right at the start of his Criminal Career.

When Jason finally hears about the rest of his kids' Backstory, he decides that Batman can wait his turn. He needs to go Kill that Vlad Bastard.

[allthegothihopgirls]

thoughts on jasons design in boy wonder being covered in scars as a way of saying he cannot remove himself from the violence that created him. he is solely red hood, there is no more jason todd— he is *just* red hood and red hood is made from violence and cannot be separated from that.

also white eyes as something just… a little off about him. not entirely human. a little zombie-esque.

also my mother was forced to listen to me yap and she mentioned that in that one panel of boy wonder he looks like frankenstein to which i got this stupid grin on my face and said “oh, you don’t even want me to START with that one” because you put those brainworms in my head.

—baptism anon

there was SO much in the boy wonder #2 that screamed of jason not being able to let his past self go. although there's definitely much psychoanalysis to be had about jason and his perception of himself, i'm more fascinated by the fact that this is how DAMIAN sees jason.

jason not taking his helmet off until right at the end of damian's story, making it seem as though he looks at him and only sees the red hood, not a brother.

the one notable thing in jason's apartment being the closed door, and there being a highlight on how that room holds every possession he has. the seperation between red hood and robin, and the acknowledgement that jason's managed to seemingly build nothing for himself post-mortem, and is still bound by who he used to be.

the white eyes definitely make him more zombie-like. i also see them as just completely devoid. like, you look at them and see nothing, just one more thing taken from him that stripped him of his humanity.

i definitely agree with jason not being able to separate from the violence his death was rooted in, and the events of utrh. the one thing i really enjoy about juni ba's design when it comes to jason is how as himself, he doesn't appear recklessly violent, or overly macho and angry, he's just hurt. i think that's why he leans into red hood so much, because that's the front that lets him appear that way. but when you strip him of the helmet, he's very much just vulnerable and there's no intimidation factor there at all. it's definitely the scars that play into that whole idea, but also just his posture, and overall figure.

he's not as strong and buffed as he's usually drawn, instead he looks very much like a prey animal. i think that just goes to further the distinction between the usual aggression he's portrayed to have with the whole intimidation and macho factor. and then this new perspective, where his anger doesn't seem to be amounting to much, just protecting his hurt.

i think damian also views the hood as a figurative mask as well as a legitimate one, he's aware of how vulnerable jason's been since the lazarus pit, and pinpoints the differences between him as a man and a concept. he definitely knows that the hood isn't just a protection of his own identity, it's an image. one that tip-toes the line between an extension of jason, and being jason.

don't even get me started with how this is all playing into my frankentodd brainrot.... so many thoughts and so many asks to answer abt him..

[numbuh-7-knd]

Newly ressurected Jason Todd gets deaged instead of Lazarus Pit-ed

Post Jason's resurrection, Talia has Jason in her custody in the LOA, he's slowly healing from his other pre death injuries but shows no signs of awareness. Ra's gives Talia a deadline where Jason either needs to be healed or show sign of cognitive improvement or he will put Jason out of his misery and have his scienctists study the corpse. He's forbidden her from using the pit on Jason and warns her that if she tries anyway it might not work, saying that the pit might not be able to heal Jason's mind if there's nothing left to heal. Ra's also tells her that in his current state of they put Jason in the Lazarus Pit the pit could consume what's left of Jason, or worse something else could hitch a ride in Jason's body.

Talia goes through the league's archives looking for anything that could treat jason and heal his mind. She finds an experimental magical treatment which does the job but has the unexpected side effect of de ageing him by several years. Where there was a severly injuried, healing 15 year old in a walking coma there is now a healed and fully cognizant Jason Todd, albeit slightly amnesiac and several years younger.

He's about the same age as Damian now, and Talia figures any plans of either returning him to Bruce while and hale as an act of good will, or of training him up and then siccing him on bruce to torment her beloved, have to be put to the side for now. She figures she's stuck with the deaged Jason for now since her beloved isn't going to look at a younger amnesiac version of his lost son and really believe that it's really Jason and not a clone. She raises him alongside Damian while trying to find a way to return the kid to his proper age and gets attached.

A few years later the events of canon happen and Talia has no choice but to send both kids to Gotham. By this point Jason's amnesia has faded a bit and he can remember enough to somewhat prove his identity to a suspious bat, and what he can't prove a DNA test, and the Justice League Magic User of your choice, can.

Bruce is left with one bio kid and one no longer dead but now 5 whole years younger than he was when he died adoptive son. What will he do? How will they explain this to the public? Will they even bother?

Maybe they claim that Jason is his own biological half(?) Brother, and that Shelia had another kid before she died, and that Bruce's ex somehow discovered his dead son's orphaned younger brother and took him in. Do they change his name or say that Shelia decided to name her second son after the first?

Or they just say that it's a coincidence that Bruce's newest adoptive kid is also named Jason, and looks a lot like Jason Todd.

"It's not my fault! My ex adopted a kid with the same name as mine, then decided to drop both our biological child as well as the adoptive child off with me. Yes, it's really weird but she isn't answeringher phone and I'm not going to seperate siblings just because only one of them is mine."

[cherryredribbon]

i like to think about the specific ways each member of the batfamily protects their secret identity

bruce: obviously, we've got the brucie wayne thing going on. also helps that through a very meticulously planned gala almost entirely for this purpose, bruce wayne and batman (dick is under the cowl, having way too much fun pretending to be batman) were photographed together. the general consensus is that these two are on-again-off-again exes, as the picture caught bruce staring unimpressively at dick!batman while dick is full grinning.

dick: both nightwing and richard grayson have active and fairly popular social media accounts. and whilst the nightwing account openly responds to any news, comments, or posts about richard grayson, the richard grayson account resolutely and absolutely ignores any and all mentions of nightwing.

considering the accounts have similiar feel-good fun vibes, (as is the case when ran by the same person) the general public has taken this to mean that the two have unpleasnt history. are they ex-lovers, bitter rivals, or worse? the gothamites certainly dont want to know, not wanting to disturb what is frankly a fragile peace between their two golden boys.

jason: doesnt. openly and loudly states that red hood is infact jason todd, bruce waynes dead son who was killed in one of jokers sprees. the internet does not believe him, and even the ones that do are unconvinced after dick and bruce do a press conference expressing "their sadness that people are impersonating their darling baby brother and son, oh tears tears tears" this absolutely drives jason into a fit of rage and that really doesnt help his case either because jason pre-pit was a darling baby that said things like "robin is magic :D"

tim: has a open and public feud with red robin that takes up way too much time but god dammit he is committed now. to the wider internet timothy drake and red robin are bitter twitter rivals that hate each other because one day tim deliriously tweeted "gotham is so silly like our vigilantes are named after restaurants and are 12" or something along those lines but to the batfam who watched as tim frantically tweeted from two seperate accounts tim and red robins feud is something is he thought of and executed within the same minute

damian: i really think the only thing keeping damians identity is just the widespread denial that this little kid who is barely 5 feet tall could be robin. like everyone has kind of a sneaking suspicion, it is definitely a popular conspiracy theory, but at the end of the day not even the local gothamites want to admit that this little kid with a sword could be robin even tho ALL the evidence point to yes. tim and babs also occasionally checks on the whole secret identity thing but both of them know there is nothing more powerful than denial.

[palesmokeisinthevoid]

Ok poll results are in and 007n7 and c00lkidd got the most votes so I’m talking about them in the 2x2’s place au!

Tw/Cw for attempted (technically successful?) Suicide

Ok, so like in canon, c00lkidd disappears, The Spectre took him. Soon after this though is when 2x2 took over the Spectre’s realm. Most of the killers one way or another were removed from the realm (John Doe died, 1x’s soul got stuck in a cave in the middle of the ocean, Jason got sent back to Robloxia and he returned to Camp Crystal Lake) but 2x2 ended up keeping c00lkidd in the realm, since they deemed him too young to face the apocalypse. They also didn’t particularly trust 007n7 due to him being an exploiter

Anyway 007n7 tried killing himself when the apocalypse began. This failed because, just like the rest of the survivors the Spectre had chosen before getting its powers taken, he got stuck with the ability to go back to the start of the day whenever he died. He assumed he dreamed of killing himself rather than going back in time and…sort of moved on? He went alone for a while before joining a group of other robloxians…and over the next three years all he really did was survive and then try not to survive.

Basically over the course of those years, n7 tried to kill himself atleast four seperate times and everytime except the last he would wake up at the start of the day, and just think it was a dream. The last time someone walked in on his attempt and managed to stop him. Once he’d recovered he ended up getting in an argument with the rest of the group. He ended up leaving the group after this.

Around this time 2x2 also decided to let c00lkidd out of their realm, mainly due to a…growing problem they’d failed to address and was beginning to become a threat to c00lkidd’s life. So they found where 007n7 was and sent c00lkidd to him, figuring that at the very least staying with his father was safer than being surrounded by poisonous, man eating flowers

Both ended up happily reuniting, but 007n7 now had the new problem of trying to figure out how to raise a kid during the apocalypse. Why didn’t he just use his c00lgui? Simple. It wasn’t up to date and the code that made it functional had become outdated, so he couldn’t really use it unless he made adjustments to its code…which he hadn’t really cared to do until now because he was busy surviving and hating himself

He spent a month trying to fix it, which he spent traveling with c00lkidd. They ended up meeting another group of survivors which told them about a “strange island near the shoreline”, and c00lkidd, remembering 2x2 once talked about something similar, decided he and 007n7 should check it out

Along the way c00lkidd learns what death is (they killed a monster together), they both die at least once (007n7 now hates spiders), 007n7 contemplates jumping off a cliff again (he doesn’t) and eventually they make it to the island via a slightly aged wooden boat where the only indication of who it belonged to was a heart carved into it with “TT + AW” in the middle

Anyway they find 1x, who sort of explains their story to them and then tells them to fuck off. They do, and around this time 007n7 manages to make major progress on upgrading the c00lgui and decides he should probably find somewhere a bit more stable for him and c00lkidd to live.

They end up traveling for about a week, walking straight past the death pit (mainly because to reach it you have to actively go down to the depths of the earth and he didn’t really know about its existence in the first place) and eventually ended up finding a good place to live. Right near an apple tree.

007n7 finally finished fixing the c00lgui, and was able to summon a few things he remembered the item id’s of to make himself and c00lkidd a house and a small garden.

Eventually another group of survivors come across this house and decide “hey maybe we should live there too” and next thing 007n7 knows he’s accidentally getting a village established. Don’t have a name for it.

That’s basically it for these two, I’ll probably come up with more in the future and if anyone has ideas/suggestions/questions I’ll be happy to hear them and answer but for now just these guys being the only ones with a kinda happy ending (with the exception of one other duo/trio(?))

[ominoose]

Damn it, now I can stop thinking of Jake as a Jason Todd au, they recently got seperate bodies.

Instead of Jake dying because Marc and Steven wouldn't save them, he dies saving them, and they don't even know. They don't find out till later, when he comes back, vengeful and broken. A violent man they can't quite place but feels connected to them, that brutalizes villains, hell bent on avenging something.

They obviously try to stop the man, they're vigilantes, they've tried to err away from such brutality.

Then he confronts them, the mask pulling back. Broken nose, scared, unstable. Cussing them out, how could they not feel a piece of them missing, like he did? He'd spent his entire life protecting them, doing what they couldn't, he's still doing it, how could they vilify him now? He died alone, away from the system, taunted about how they abandoned him for each other, months trapped in the mental psych ward being tortured over and over again.

Marc and Steven would try reasoning with him, telling him they're sorry, they didn't know he existed, they'd sensed something but they were caught up with life, so much was going on. They can fix this together, it doesn't have to be like this. They can be a family.

It only angers him more. In his heart he'd always felt he'd never be equal to them, Marc would never treat him as dearly as he does Steven, and Steven would never cling to him as he does Marc. He knew he would be the monster, the scapegoat. But how could they not put aside their moral code, one they've never even consistently used, for him? He'd scarified his entire being, has so much blood on his hands, he only became a marine then a vigilante for Marc, to protect Steven, and yet they won't kill one villain for "family"?

Is it the pent up frustration, the years of tip toeing in shadows, trapped in mental prison, or the Lazarus pit, making Jake tremble with feverish, manic rage, he doesn't know. He can only feel. And underneath the pain, the indignation, the righteous anger, what he feels at his core is alone.

[punkeropercyjackson]

The Anomalies aka Miles,Percy and Jason headcanons because i keep wanting to talk about how they hang out and work together

So!!Going in,Miles is a dreadhead and transmascfem,Percy is an afrolatina trans woman and Jason is afrolatino and fat.Be respectful ty!!

Dairy Super is their 2000s cartoon protagonists hang out.It's the Prime Earth equivalent to Dairy Queen and it was their first ever place they had a proper convo post-Miles and Percy literally crashing into Jason on his motorcyle as they shot out of their portals on the outskirts of Gotham so it has a special place in their hearts

Usual orders:Salted caramel truffles with a double cheeseburger and fries for Miles,blue cotton candy and blue kryptonian burgers for Percy and frosted animal cookies and a taco salad for Jason.They're regulars and a staple as something of Dairy Super cryptids that let you take pictures of them and show their powers for you if you ask first instead of being rude.Eventually Dairy Super announces a The Anomalies special meal you can earn with coupons

They have schedueld weekly diy sessions-they each have their own collection of diy items they made and gifts from the other two's but their favorites they've made are their 'White Streak Gang' tops,Percy's gray streak having faded and Miles getting his own white streak with Apollo's Blessing for their artistic talent and dedicated-Miles' is a sleveless hoodie,Percy's is a crop top and Jason's is a baggy t-shirt.The sessions were Percy's idea as the most actively punk out of the team!!

Obviously Percy and Jason join in on Miles' art,most notably his grafitti but also literally as he dedicates his sketchbook to them upon their first seperation like he does Gwen.They snatch it up from him and tease him about it like her in Atsv too and he's even more embarrased.They tag with him across New York,Gotham and Metropolis too and he got them into painting and chalk(Jason actually bit into one when he thought nobody was looking and they didn't say nothing because all their autistic asses had done it at some point so no snitches)

They watch Bluey together.Yeah there's no way around it,they simply would.It's where Jason got his nickname for Percy,Bluey,not just because Bluey Heeler is blue but also because she's so Percy-coded and it was Miles' suggestion to watch it so Jason tried to resist but couldn't at both Miles and Percy's Kitty Cat Eyes™️ and Mike,once you see this drop lore for their fave characters and episodes and merch they've stolen /lh /nf

Ghosthunting amd cryptidhunting but actually because they know damn well they actually exist even before Jason's ressurected ass came along.They exorcise when needed but mostly just make new ghost friends and they ask the cryptids questions and help out with their problems if they're benevolent,which they almost always are

Miles is strawberries,Percy is blue raspberry and Jason is cookies and cream.Miles is pink and black,Percy is blue and pink and Jason is red and pink.Miles is a sunflower,Percy is a bluebell and Jason is a rose.Iykyk

Miles is basically a human kamoji in his mannerisms and expressions and it drew Percy and Jason in big time out of wanting to keep around him for how fun and adoptable he is and his hardcore traits underneath only made them love him even more

And vice versa as Miles felt Percy and Jason are trustworthy instantly due to how overtly tough they are but could sense a hidden gooey softness underneath and it's all around a well-balanced dynamic from the start

They go to the beach in diy'd suits made to reflect their aesthetics:Miles' is a cutesy swim trunks and tank top,Jason's is gothic swim suits and no shirt to show off his Lazarus Pit top surgery scars and Percy's is a mermaid themed blue bikini with an attached hoodie.They always make sure to help clean the shore and ocean on each trip but also to have fun by swimming together,sunbathing,getting ice cream and boba if they're lucky,collecting seashells,sandcastle building and even playing with the marine life per courtsey of Percy

Percy carries around motivational stickers so Miles and Jason picked up the habit but completely different kinds from hers-Percy's are ocean based,Miles' are pastel kidcore and Jason's are kidgothic

Miles and Jason do that brothers thing where you throw food in the air for the other to catch with your mouth.They get it 8/10 of the time

Percy does that mom friend thing where she places her hand on the back of Miles and Jason's heads to pull them close to hers in a hug as she closes her eyes

Jason subconciously amps up his scary aura when he senses or at least percieves a threat to Miles or Percy and notably dosen't do it for himself

Jason is basically a portable heater with how warm he always is contrary to the ghostly assumption of him being cold all the time so Miles and Percy plop down on him often even if not their entire bodies and he's not complaining because of how comfy they feel

Miles and Percy do their nails with Miles starting off with just a plain color until Percy got him to embrace his femininity and now they both do real nail art and got Jason to join in by revealing they could do tradgoth styles on him.Miles does multicolor or sunflowers,Percy does sharp and aquarium(because lmfao)and Jason has them do edgy ahh ones on him

They have matching tamagotchis Margo hacked to be communicators too:Miles' is a cat,Percy's is a shark and Jason's is a bat

Tim and Miles are a thing?????Obviously?That goes without saying,it's not a real crossover if they aren't.Tim and Miles crushed on sight and only didn't get together sooner because teenage boygirls are stupid and they're so cheesy together and so t4t and audhd4audhd too and Tim is also cherokee on Janet's side!!His brown swag bewitched Miles just like her afrolatina swag bewitched him /lh.They put their minecrafts beds next to eachothers and i wanna see TV Girl redraws with them STAT

Bruce:Uh.....Watcha got there? Jason,standing with a hot earthy part-kryptonian part-human half greek-god girl(Percy)and an itsy bitsy ass spider mutant who's technically a quasi-god by virtue of blessing and blue power ring accsess(Miles)and all three of them sipping Batburger milkshakes:Batburger Batidas

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Miracle Magic

by Samael8216

This fic comes from the amalgamation of constant MariBat binge reading as a coping mechanism, Its a Sibling Daminette AU, in which they where seperated while in the league. Damian was trained to be the next head, like normal, while Marinette was supposed to be trained in magic, having a connection to the magic of the pits.

The story also takes a canon divergence from the Miracle Queen episode, with it ending roughly the same but with Hawkmoth being revealed and the peacock being retrieved.

As for the DC side of it im not all that versed outside of MariBat fics and the UTRH movie, Jason Todd is probably the best bat and I am not arguing it.

Im only going to use the Shanghai Miraculous Special because the new york one is literally just the DCU but miraculous-ified, Ive seen some good fics that use both, namely the 'Marinettes Trust Issues' fic but I dont think I'd do it justice enough.

Words: 1233, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Miraculous Ladybug

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Talia al Ghul, Ra's al Ghul, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Gabriel Agreste, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir

Additional Tags: Post-Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth Identity Reveal, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Bruce Wayne is Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug's Biological Parent

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/44532073

[the-witches-you-couldnt-burn]

It's final

Dedicated to my best friend K, who exclusively reads angst (yes I know she is crazy).

Warnings: domestic disputes, panic attacks & mental breakdowns.

Ao3

———————————————

“Why are you such a fucking bitch?”

She froze, her anger steeled within her. Their argument was abruptly silenced, both tempers flaring high enough to threaten the heavens. Heaving breaths from their vocal exertions became louder than their previous yelling. A pang of fear struck her heart as she wonders whether the neighbours had heard them and called the police for a domestic dispute.

Marinette was furious. She wasn’t a saint during this war of words, and had said somethings she shouldn’t have. She had started this argument with the intentions of lessening his reckless behaviour, but ended up stating in anger that his mother would be stopping his behaviour too. That line lead to his outburst and the state they were in now.

Cheeks flushed red, particles of perspiration dotted their skin, bodies wound with tension. She swiftly motioned towards the door, hand reaching to the knob. Jason grabbed her other wrist, deep seated sadness displayed over his features, immediately regretting his words spoken by ire. Her head tilted downwards, stubbornly refusing to meet his eyes.

“I didn’t mean it,” his voice cracked, any traces of rage had melted into sorrow.

“You never do, but it hurts the same.” She shook her arm, detaching his hand from her wrist. His grip was firm but unwilling to deny her, her free will. She picked up her purse, slinging the strap over her shoulder. The door opened, she could feel his stare on the back of his head. Her sigh filled the empty space, without turning she said, “I think it’s better that we seperate, we aren’t good for each other. I’m willing to keep up appearances with your family at the gala but then I’ll move my belongings to another apartment.”

She turned around, rushing into his embrace, tears shed from her eyes. A final hug goodbye. His stray tears raced down his cheeks to reach their raven hair finish line. He made no move to respond to her hug. Usually he’d have wrapped her in his arms, especially after an argument like this. But this one was different. This would be their last.

“Au revior, Jason.” She removed her body from his. It left him wanting to pull her back but it was as if his muscles had necrotic back to a corpse. His eyes flicked down to his invisible chains, begging his arms to move, to capture his lightning bug and never let her go. He looked back at her, she stood there, seemingly wanting him to say something, anything.

“I’m sorry.” His hoarse voice whispered, he desperately wanted to pepper her face with kisses and beg her to forgive a cretin like him. His voice broke as he uttered, “Please.”

Blue eyes met blue eyes. Marinette’s head shook slightly, non-verbally denying him. A bitter laugh escaped her mouth, she brought up her hand cover her crazed smile. “I’m sorry too.” She sobbed.

She rushed out the door, practically sprinting to the elevator. As the strong metal door closed, her sobbed echoed around the empty box. She broke down, months of fights and building tensions had weighed her down, her creativity had been primarily funnelled into ways she could improve her relationship. Il vaut mieux prévenir que guérir (It is better to prevent than to heal).

When the door closed Jason’s knees collapsed, a hollow echo resounded through the hallway. Their shared apartment would be no longer. No more hello, good bye kisses; no more delicious meals shared between the two; no more sleepy morning kisses. He looked down at his hands, clenched fists. A primal cry left his throat, he felt it to his core. He would have rather had his heart ripped out, he would have rather have died again, than to feel this pain.

——

It was the night of the gala, only four days after their fight. Marinette had only come back to their condo once to collect some clothes and her sewing machine. Only the essentials were taken, the rest could be gathered by movers.

Jason was a wreck. He had worked multiple overtime shifts to avoid the festering wound that was his bleeding heart. Preparing for his family’s ball was tough, this would be the first time they would see each other since the argument. He sported a fresh haircut which was left messy, his white button down top hugged his muscles perfectly, was paired with a slate grey blazer and matching dress pants (both gifts from Marinette).

He was fiddling with his tie, the gala’s atmosphere was already suffocating due to insufferable and rich hotshots, and his tie decided that he didn’t need to breathe. Marinette didn’t care for appearances but knew his family lived under the watchful eye of the media, so she always made sure they were matching. But tonight, tonight he had no clue what she was wearing and had received no colour matching instructions, so he went with trusty rusty red. It was the first thing the fashionista made for him and he will always cherish it.

His eyes widened as he saw her enter. She wore a midnight silk black mermaid gown that had a chiffon overskirt that was black fading to blood red. Her hair was down and curled, a silver feather hair clip pinned back the left side of her hair, exposing her magnificent facial features. Cerulean eyes framed by dark painted lashes, scanned the room.

Her heart caught in her throat, she had entered the doors to the banquet hall. She came with the intention of saying her silent goodbyes to the family who had taken her in when she had no one else. She had been suffering in silence for the past few days, her only support system being the Wayne Clan, but couldn’t bring herself to tell them what had happened. She couldn’t do that to Jason, she wouldn’t make them choose between him and her, she dreaded to hear their answers. Resigning herself to reside in silence, she came here to keep up appearances then fade into obscurity, but she saw him and her breath died in her throat. He looked as handsome as the day she left him. She wiped her sweaty palms on her dress. She walked towards him; he spotted her and did the same. They met in the middle, on the dance floor.

“You look amazing Marinette.” He swallowed the urge to call her pixie, it hung heavy in his throat. He needed to create distance between them, that was the first advice in ‘How to be civil after a breakup’. During the silent nights, he delved into any written text that would give him refuge and advice.

“You too Jason.” The pit in his stomach grew, he should have known she would take the same path. Never would he hear ‘Jay’ or ‘Jayjay’ from her plump red lips again. His shoulders slumped a fraction before he shooed away his depressing thoughts.

Their conversing was viewed by many around the room. They were the odd couple of the family. Jason, despite his rich adoptive home worked in security and charity whilst Marinette was a hardworking fashionista who had built her own fashion empire. They were from two different worlds and only fate knew that they’d meet.

He bowed and held out a hand to her, a lopsided smiled danced across his face. She smiled sadly, she would miss her dork, she would miss his smile. Her hand brushed against his calloused palm, their fingers locked together. She hesitated before placing a hand on his shoulder, ‘just one dance’, she could do this.

His hand found her waist, warmth bloomed upon his cold skin. He was always cold since he died, only his temper had warmed him. But then he met her. Marinette was his warmth, she made him feel like he was a child again, bathing in Gotham’s rare sunlight. His lightning bug brought him warmth and he had lost it.

They swayed to the classic instrumental melody. Neither looked at each other as their bodies flowed, ‘it was just an act’, they chanted as a mantra within their minds. ‘It means nothing, soon this will be over’. It struck her, this would be the final time they would see each other. A quiet sob escaped her, she was unable to do anything to stop it.

Jason’s head snapped towards her, sweeping her away into a private garden. Between her weeping she apologised for the state she was in, hyperventilating soon after. Jason guided her to a bench and clasped her hands in his.

“Hey, hey! Mari look at me. Deep breaths in and out, ok?.” Screw creating distance, this was his girl, he will fight anyone who says otherwise. Marinette slowly began to wind down from her panic attack, eyes misty and her water-proof mascara blotchy but still intact. The temperamental man wiped her cheeks free from trails of liquid fright.

“I’m so sorry for everything Jason. I never should have said that thing about your mother, that was cruel. I can’t keep hurting the people I care about. I can’t keep you happy. I’m just not enough.”

Her cries broke down his own walls, exposing his vulnerability to the Gotham night. “Fuck the word enough. It’s synonyms: sufficient, ample and adequate, could never describe what you mean to me.” He pressed his forehead on her, blue eyes fluttering shut. “I’m not sure if any of us will ever be enough for anything. There’s no point in begging for it.”

“I hate goodbyes.” She whispered, lips inches from his. Their breaths mingled, cheeks flushing. The icy Gotham air whipped at their skin causing them to move closer to the other for sanctuary.

“Then let’s not make this one.” Fireworks. That’s what they felt when their lips connected. All of the week’s tension unraveled within this lip lock. Their teeth clashed and hands tugged at hair in desperation to close the distance between them. When she entered the gala tonight, she had been so ready to say, ‘adieu pour toujours,’ but was glad she didn’t need to.

C’est cela l’amour, tout donner, tout sacrifier sans es poir de retour. (This is love, giving it ones all, sacrificing everything without hope of it being returned.)

[popculturebuffet]

Darkwing Duck Reviews: Tiff of the Titans

Uh-Oh, Gizmoduck Comes to town! In the first of a series of reviews building up to Just Us Justice Ducks,  the dopey, arrogant, anti-charasmatic, national embarrassment heads to St. Canard to guard a super weapon from F.O.W.L. Naturally, he ends up being more of a problem for our hero than the actual bad guys. Also a look at Tad Stone’s claims the series isn’t in the same universe as Ducktales.  Full review and recap commissioned by @weirdkev27​ under the cut

This review, much like Death, Taxes and Thanos, was inevitable. I’d been planning to watch and review the first appearances of each of the justice ducks and fearsome five as my next step in watching Darkwing duck anyway, and while I’ve already got one member’s appearance in the wings anyway, I’ll get to that tomorrow or Saturday just in time for Halloween, hint hint, Kev pushed this one into the queue with a commission and I  was happy to take the side trip to see just what the Darkwing version of Gizmoduck and Steelbeak, two of my favorites in the reboot, were like originally. So welcome folks to the build to the greatest superhero team made up of ducks of all time, let’s get quackin. 

We open, here in Duckburg, where the Eggmen are breaking in. Sadly they do not have the master plan, but they are here to steel the Comarant, a super powerful land, sea and air device the military is storing there. They instead find Gizmoduck! Who makes a good first impression, being a hoaky superman parody in iron man’s costume in this continuity, but it’s a nice way to contrast to Darkwing’s batman parody with a touch of Sandman.. the pulp one not the neil gaiman one.  Sadly he doesn’t have a cool gas mask but the Darkwing Duck costume is iconic without it. 

Point is the eggmen are easily repelled, though they do get away by blasting Gizmo with a tank. The General in charge is thankful for Gizmoduck’s help, but notes the Comarant will be heading to St. Canard soon for a demonstration at the big air show, and asks that Giz go over and protect it, maybe even work with Darkwing to protect it. Though Gizmo shoots that down, and not only insults Darkwing but says he’s not sure if he’s good or bad. While the latter comment did sour me on the guy.. research bears out Darkwing has been framed once or twice, and my own experience with the pilot saw him you know breaking out of jail and basically clamming superheroes are above the law, so I COULD get why someone wouldn’t trust him, even if Giz’s attitude about it still isn’t great. So fenton quick changes behind a sign and heads off to see his old buddy Launchpad.  A quick aside before we get going this episode doesn’t so much torch Tad Stone’s retroactive claim this isn’t the same universe as Ducktales, as burn it to ashes, take a whiz on those ashes and send each separate ash on a seperate probe to the farthest reaches of space. This episode not only has a cameo by Scrooge on a billboard.. but it’s one for DUCKBURG. Where Gizmoduck is said to be from. He also knows launchpad well, and vice versa, and outright mentions McDuck Manor. the episode couldn’t be saying “this is the same universe as ducktales’ harder if Scrooge himself showed up and started ranting about a Sea Monster eating his ice cream. I do like and respect Tad Stones, but I will never like or respect this claim of his and even if HE had that idea in his head during production of the show, it’s very clear everyone else including Disney who greenlit the Darkwing Duck comics explicitly connecting the two universes, felt it was a shared universe, and there’s really no reason they can’t coexist. 

If it’s because “Well launchpad wouldn’t leave scrooge”.. besides the fact Scrooge tried to fire him MULTIPLE times, it’s not farfetched Scrooge would put him in charge of a hangar both because he trusts him.. and to get rid of him since he doesn’t like Launchpad very much. Plus Donald has to come back from his tour of duty sometime and likely could easily do Launchpad’s job as pilot, as he did in the source material. My point is there’s tons of ways to write the man out easily, and he could just as easily be doing both jobs like in the reboot. This feels like a weird, unnecessary retcon no one wanted and everyone just politely ignores, like the creators of Doug saying he and Patti didn’t end up together after High School. Which even then makes more sense than this claim, since at least there I get the creators not thinking a high school romance would last forever. That’s fair.. it’s just not something fans really wanted to hear after spending two separate series and a movie getting them together. It would be like if Girl Meets World had revealed Cory and Topanga had divorced. Yes it’d be possible since they’d broken up twice over the course of the series, but no one wanted that, why would you do that. I’m getting off topic, the point is a few breakups aside Doug and Patti clearly married eventually, and Darkwing Duck and Ducktales are in the same universe. Sometimes you just have to ignore Word of God for your own sanity.

Back at the actual episode we cut to Steelbeak’s Bowling Alley Hideout... and I do love a job that allows me to say things like that. But in a really fantastic bit Steelbeak is bowling his minions over as punishment for failure.. even though they have a valid reason but eh he’s the bad guy and he has to get his bowling average up for FOWL’s bowling team somehow. Their insurance covers evil punishment related accidents anyways, they’ll be fine. 

But yeah let’s talk about Steelbeak for a second. I honestly hadn’t seen any of the original version so I was curious.. and he’s really damn awesome. Rob Paulsen always does a great job though and is always a pleasure, but he really does a good job here and with the contrast in him: He’d seem like a dumb thug, what with his gangster accent and general cockiness and swagger.. but he backs it up with great combat and even greater planning. He’s a schemer, a fighter and damn if he isn’t fun to watch.  It also makes me love the reboot version even more. While I already loved him for being played by Jason Mantzokus, being enjoyably dim, while also still enough of a threat to be freaking cool, it’s even cooler knowing he’s still fundamentally the same character. Much like Drake he’s simply been tweaked a bit. For drake it was softening the edges since Ducktales isn’t as broad a show, and neither will the darkwing reboot i’m betting, so his ego and selfishness is sanded down considerably. For Steelbeak it’s giving him an actual origin: Instead of starting at the top of FOWL, he’s starting as a very competent but very wet behind the ears and full of himself agent, working his way up to becoming justifably full of himself like the original show. He has the same swagger and badassery, he’s just not a master planner yet and he’ll get there. Like many of the reboot characters, he’s simply an already great character given some extra depth and rounding out. I love both and can’t wait to see him again next ep and hopefully he’ll show up in the Darkwing reboot so they can go for round 2. 

So with that out of the way, Darkwing naturally interrupts, and cleans house with his gas gun, forcing Steelbeak and his crew to literally go underground into the sewers. This successfully fools drake, and Steelbeak bemoans how both Darkwing and Gizmoduck have been thwarting his plans.. until he gets a great idea; pit them against each other so he can pilfer the comerant while their too busy fighting. It’s a classic supervillain tactic, and one that works perfectly because one of them’s an egotist and a dick and the other is also that but with more style and likeability.  Back at Drake’s place, Gosalyn and Honker are watching a horror movie they clearly aren’t supposed to till Drake and launchpad come back in via their easy chairs flipping them in from Darkwing Tower which is just.. really cool. I like it. I also like that much like the Shakespeare bust in Wayne Manor, Darkwing has his own neat statue to provide acess to his lair... a tiny bronze statue of Basil from the Great Mouse Detective.. I REALLY need to fucking watch that film but it’s a nice nod. But yeah Launchpad brought them back because he feels drake could use a break while Drake refuses to stop because crime never stops and he doesn’t have time for it and your usual self destructive bollocks. It’s interrupted by a knock at the door? 

It’s Fenton! Whose stopped in to see his old buddy launchpad, who is happy to see his old friend and the two catch up, though Drake dosen’t like the interuption because Classic Drake is kind of a grumpus. Fenton naturally is here because Gizmoduck is but says he’s doing a job for the military.. which makes no sense but given Drake doesn’t know what he does and Launchpad dares to be stupid, if not nearly as stupid as his reboot version, no one questions it. When Fenton says he needs to find a hotel Launchpad, being Launchpad, invites him to stay and while Fenton watches the movie with the kids, Drake wants him gone because you know he has a secret identity to keep and a case to work on and they don’t know if they can trust him with it. It’s fair.. but since this is Drake he almost handles it with the subtly of a howitzer. But before he can try to literally throw Fenton out on his ass, a news report comes on about an attack at a local theater and both head off to take care of it.. we also get a nice moment where both react to it with the same words at the same time.  Fenton.. is actually really likeable. He’s a bit awkward, more in that he sort of barges in and makes himself comfy.. but it’s very easy to see from this and the one Ducktales episode of his i’ve seen where the utterly marvelous reboot version gets some traits from: his nervousness, his pluckness, his lack of thinking things through ocasionally when he’s not overthinking them. Fenton is charming. The issue is once he switches on the costume he goes from utterly charming to punchable REALLL quick. I’ll explain my problems with his alter ego in a sec. 

At the theater Steelbeak fakes it to look like Darkwing’s doing the bombing, if half haphazardly and leaves Darkwing with the bomb so when Gizmo shows up he thinks he’s responsible. Darkwing naturally says it wasn’t him, but Gizmo dosen’t buy it and asks if he’s so good how come he wears a mask... says the guy in a helmeted visor’s whose only defense when that’s pointed out is it came with the suit. Which yes is a joke.. but it fails to land and instead of being funny just makes Gizmo look like a hypocritical dick whose assuming someone is evil based on flimsy evidence, and what’s very obviously a setup. it makes him come off as the biggest dumbass alive instead of this world’s superman and that is annoying. More ranting about him in a minute. We do end up getting an incredibly funny bit where the two end up arguing over who gets to defuse a bomb, with both wrestling over it till Gizmoduck takes care of it and both fall into the theater. Gizmoduck tries to arrest Darkwing who ignores him and runs off.  The next day the Mallard family, including Honker naturally, watches Gizmoduck get a parade, a key to the city and other good stuff on the news while Drake sulks before turning it off. And yeah i’ve waited long enough let’s talk about this version of Gizmoduck and why he does not work. I get in theory he’s supposed to be “The Cape”, minus the cape: The big cheese that everyone looks up to and loves to Darkwing’s  dark avenger of the night, a parody of that whose also really dumb. The issue is two fold. The first is .. the classic archtypical cape type chracter has been parodied to hell and back by 2020. He’s been a monster, an asshole and as with here an idiot. And even for then a superman parody, if not in apperance or powers but in treatment, whose really dumb wasn’t very new. 

And you CAN parody a big silver age type hero: Justice League International did so well without being too overt, having most of the team either annoyed or actively hostile to Shazam/Captain Marvel. But it was done well there because well.. billy’s a very corny very earnest and likeable kid in an adult’s body. To us he’s charming and loveable. But to a bunch of actual adults he’d be offputting at best and annoying at worst. While some have been annoyed at how he was handled, I a fan of both JLI and Shazam liked it and thought it was an interesting take. Another REALLY good and REALLY hilarious take on this is from fellow superhero action comedy Danny Phantom, one of my favorites and one I need to revisit. One episode had Danny split himself in two so he could crimefight and have fun with his friends resulting in one self whose a burnt out slacker, and another whose an over the top crimefighter who says things like “you Felonious fiend!” And “This looks like a job for the vacuum cleaner!”. It’s a damn good episode. My point is it’s been better done before and since. 

What doesn’t help is the episode tries to paint it as equal, since Darkwing’s problem in part is Gizmoduck stealing his thunder.. but it doesn’t work. Darkwing is a fully fleshed out character we know and love who despite his huge ego and rampant jackassery, is a decent person whose fought hard for St. Canard, loves his daughter and most damingly... is entertainingly sickish. Gizmoduck’s dickery just makes him come off less likeable and incredibly dense, while Darkwing’s is part of his charm and, along with his ego, has backfired enough to balance it out. Gizmo just doesn’t get comeuppance for his behavior, and instead gets rewarded with a parade, a key to the city, cheerleaders and Gosalyn looking up to him just for having powers in his gadgets. And really his methods aren’t that different from dark wing: While Darkwing is secretive, a loner and uses gadgets.. Gizmoduck’s suit is basically one BIG gadget, and he refuses to see. And I get that’s probably the joke but it just. doesn’t. LAND. It just makes him insufferable. And as far as I can tell in the original show he wasn’t: he was an awkward dork we root for like in the reboot, not a gloryhogging jackass whose squandered his good will long before he gets Darkwing isn’t evil and tries working with him to the point I don’t care by the time that happens: He’s already been so obnoxious it dosen’t make up for it. Maybe later appearances are better but he’s just a chore to watch in costume here. And that’s WITHOUT comparing him to the 2017 version, one of my favorites there, one of the best animated superheroes i’ve seen in a long time, and a toughly likeable character who struggles due to his superhero identity but took it up for exactly the right reasons and wants to help people. Darkwing Gizmoduck thinks he’s the cape and an inspiration when a good guy when he’s worse than the guy he hates at times. Reboot Gizmo is an honest, decent guy who simply wants to help people and use the gizmotech as a way to do that, to help change the world for the better and save the helpless, and only clashes with Darkwing due to his ego and lack of understanding that Gizmoduck and him really aren’t that different. Finally if THIS is why Tad Stones wants them to be different universes, because this Fenton is different from the Ducktales one in personality.. then that’s on HIM. That’s on him for writing this version poorly or letting him get written so poorly and not on the fans who had no reason not to connect a dot. God this character was disappointing and hopefully when I watch more of him at work in Ducktales, he isn’t this obnoxious, nor will he hopefully be in his sequel episodes.  Thankfully moving on Darkwing gets to work, because you know he has experience, and finds Steelbeak trying to pilfer the cormorant but Captain Clueless interrupts and tries to arrest him. The two then finally fight and while it’s sadly short, it’s a fun clash and I genuinely hope the reboot has it’s own fight with them, as given how damn good they are at fight scenes, it’s bound to be even more awesome. But Steelbeak gets away, and uses the comarant’s secret weapon.. a giant fake egg that drops a giant pile of yolk to drown them. Gizmo finally realizes he’s been fighting the wrong guy but our hero's are now running out of time. Darkwing , being the actually capable one here, has Gizmo uses his propeller to beat the eggs and the two head off.. though after a funny bit where Gizmo breaks the Ratcatcher’s sidecar Darkwing lets him use his spare tier, which is huge and likely intended for the main vehicle. Good stuff.  The two get after Steelbeak and while Gizmo makes me pray for death but death won’t come we get a fun battle with Steelbeak including Steelbeak using his beak to bite down and destroy the gas gun. It’s a damn fun bit I must say. But eventually the good guys win, disable the comarant and Darkwing beats Steelbeak. The day is save, FOWL is foiled, our heroes are on shaky but better terms, and Drake and Fenton depart on good if equally shaky terms, before arguing about which of them is better. And we’re out.  Final Thoughts: This.. was a disappointingly mixed bag. Gizmoduck REALLY drug down what was otherwise a good episode with a great concept: Bringing in a hero whose stronger and more popular than Darkwing.. but mostly uses it to make Darkwing look good, which he didn’t need, and make Gizmoduck look REALLY bad, intentionally or otherwise. Steelbeak is a delight and his plan, and the egg trap, are really good, and as mentioned there are enough good set pieces to prevent this from being a terrible episode.. but as an old friend says for me time and time again...

[sportsandsongs]

Favourite Songs From 2020

My 110 favourite songs of the year - basically one song per artist and then I doubled up on songs from my ten favourite albums of the year - Taylor Swift, Pheobe Bridgers, The Strokes, The Killers, Porridge Radio, The 1975, The Weeknd, Fleet Foxes, Soccer Mommy PUP - rather than do a seperate albums list. So 100 artists total.

It was definitely a year that I listened to songs more than albums. Blame Spotify for shrinking my attention span or the lockdown for pushing me more towards short bursts of pleasure.

I think it was a great year for music though, this list is as strong as any in recent years. Dominated by indie rock for the most part, and in turn as heavy on female led acts as any year, as they have taken over the rock scene (for the better) over the past couple years.

1 - Phoebe Bridgers - Kyoto 2 - King Princess - Ohio 3 - Taylor Swift - exile (feat. Bon Iver) 4 - The Strokes - The Adults Are Talking 5 - U.S. Girls - 4 American Dollars 6 - The Killers - Imploding The Mirage 7 - Caamp - By and By 8 - Nathaniel Rateliff - And It's Still Alright 9 - Porridge Radio - 7 Seconds 10 - The 1975 - If You’re Too Shy (Let Me Know) 11 - The Strokes - Brooklyn Bridge To Chorus 12 - The Weeknd - Blinding Lights 13 - Bright Eyes - Mariana Trench 14 - The Killers - My Own Soul’s Warning 15 - Mt. Joy - Strangers 16 - Dayglow - Can I Call You Tonight? 17 - Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - Be Afraid 18 - Phoenix - Identical 19 - Car Seat Headrest - Deadlines (Thoughtful) 20 - The Beths - Dying to Believe

21 - HAIM - The Steps 22 - Gus Dapperton - Post Humorous 23 - Holly Humberstone - Falling Asleep At The Wheel 24 - Phoebe Bridgers - I Know The End 25 - Hayley Williams - Simmer 26 - Tame Impala - Lost In Yesterday 27 - Harry Styles - Watermelon Sugar 28 - Fontaines D.C. - Televised Mind 29 - Yves Tumor - Gospel For A New Century 30 - Dawes - Who Do You Think You're Talking To? 31 - Taylor Swift - betty 32 - Partner - Honey 33 - Of Monsters and Men - Visitor 34 - Fleet Foxes - Can I Believe You 35 - The Shins - The Great Divide 36 - Jessie Ware - Spotlight 37 - DIIV - Blankenship 38 - The Districts - Cheap Regrets 39 - Riverby - Smart Mouth 40 - Beach Bunny - Rearview

41 - The 1975 - Me & You Together Song 42 - Miley Cyrus - Midnight Sky 43 - Deep Sea Diver - Impossible Weight (feat Sharon Van Etten) 44 - Fiona Apple - Shameika 45 - Waxahatchee - Fire 46 - Foo Fighters - Shame Shame 47 - Dogleg - Kawasaki Backflip 48 - Christine and the Queens - People, I've been sad 49 - Middle Kids - R U 4 Me? 50 - SAULT - Wildfires 51 - Ghostpoet - Nowhere To Hide Now 52 - The Darcys - Look Me in the Eyes 53 - Diet Cig - Night Terrors 54 - Westerman - Confirmation - SSBD 55 - Maxband - Unsaid 56 - Porridge Radio - Sweet 57 - The Backseat Lovers - Kilby Girl 58 - Royal Blood - Trouble’s Coming 59 - Soccer Mommy - circle the drain 60 - The Weeknd - After Hours

61 - Run The Jewels - walking in the snow 62 - The Hold Steady - Family Farm 63 - STRFKR - Dear Stranger 64 - PUP - Anaphylaxis 65 - beabadoobee - Care 66 - Soccer Mommy - yellow is the color of her eyes 67 - Destroyer - Cue Synthesizer 68 - Wallows - Are You Bored Yet? (feat. Clairo) 69 - Local Natives - Lemon (Feat. Sharon Van Etten) 70 - Bad Moves - Party With the Kids Who Wanna Party With You 71 - The Beaches - Want What You Got 72 - Wolf Parade - Julia Take Your Man Home 73 - Billy Nomates - Modern Hart 74 - The Dirty Nil - Blunt Force Concussion 75 - KennyHoopla - how will i rest in peace if i'm buried by a highway?// 76 - IDLES - Model Village 77 - Arkells - Quitting You 78 - Bombay Bicycle Club - Eat, Sleep, Wake (Nothing But You) 79 - Best Coast - Everything Has Changed 80 - Andy Shauf - Try Again

81 - Peach Pit - Shampoo Bottles 82 - Sorry - Perfect 83 - THICK - Bumming Me Out 84 - Trace Mountains - Lost in the Country 85 - Hum - Step into You 86 - Fleet Foxes - Sunblind 87 - Pinegrove - The Alarmist 88 - Lady Gaga - Rain On Me (with Ariana Grande) 89 - Kiwi jr. - Murder in the Cathedral 90 - The Chicks - Gaslighter 91 - Perfume Genius - On the Floor 92 - Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever - She's There 93 - Amanda Shires - The Problem (feat. Jason Isbell) 94 - Bon Iver - AUATC 95 - The OBGMs - All My Friends 96 - PUP - Rot 97 - Alanis Morissette - Ablaze 98 - Anyway Gang - I'm Just That Good 99 - Everything Everything - Violent Sun 100 - Julia Jacklin - Pressure To Party 101 - Grimes - Delete Forever 102 - Plants and Animals - Love That Boy 103 - Dua Lipa - Physical 104 - Cloud Nothings - Am I Something 105 - Wye Oak - AEIOU 106 - Sunflower Bean - Moment In The Sun 107 - Pale Waves - Change 108 - Bruce Springsteen - Ghosts 109 - Gord Downie - About Blank 110 - Dizzy - Sunflower

[thattimdrakeguy]

If I read todays Heroes in Crisis issue more then the panels people keep showing on tumblr, it's a cry for help and cruel and unusual punishment for myself.

I'm still not over it. "Cute, mean one" "Nice, funny one" "Cool, rebellious one". Give me a break, Thomas. Just admit you never read any of them before besides panels on tumblr. It's just making it more and more infuriating. It's so painfully obvious you don't know anything about the characters you choose to write.

Two of them are either a former murderer, or a current one, and you described one of them like the Fonz, and the other like a 6 year old bully.

Like how can he seriously think those were really good ways of describing them, while also acting like each of their biggest struggle in life to talk about in hero therapy is not knowing who they are deep down? A filled out three of them, three completely different characters, lives, and struggles, he simplified besides two traits each that apparently define them and seperate them from each other, and those two traits each don't even suit them or fit them. Thomas just doesn't care.

Jason literally died. Ya know the thing that's hard to get over? That whole Lazerus Pit madness thing? His feeling of rage he has so constantly cuz of all the crime he's seen and the victims hurt that his rage has become so potent it's enough to kill criminals over it? Stuff that could easily make a tear jerking issue you replace with "cool, rebellious one" and "who am I", he murders people, Thomas. Why would they think he's the cool one. He betrayed them, for reasons, but that's something they take seriously. Why call that cool and rebellious? Murder? He may not always like who he is but he knows damn well who he is.

Dick has such confidence that I don't honestly know if he questioned himself like that much till he got replaced as Robin or became Batman. He's not just "the nice, funny one", Dick was Tim's childhood icon. Tim admired Dick for years till he met him and went on to become his tiny little brother, and Dick was protective over him for a long time, they felt for each other strongly. Even just by himself Dick's had angst, he can have anger problems that lash out when he doesn't try to calm himself, something he used to be known for, and Tim has witnessed this. They know each other more than most of the others would, to just summarize each other with two words, like that makes it seem like they barely know each other. Especially with Tim, to act like they only just occasionally work together when Dick meant so much to Tim it just becomes insulting to the characters.

And Dick would never call Tim the dark one, especially when describing Damian and Jason as well at the same freaking time. I don't care if you only read Red Robin, that is an outlier for the character. Dick had to partially raise Tim during moments of his life to teach him stuff he didn't know. He was Dick's fanboy then little brother. Would he call him troubled or even just a kid who has some bad struggles with depression? Perhaps if Red Robin was still going on, but even then hard to believe fully, but I could at least picture it. They mean a lot to each other. They mean too much to eachother to act like they been described by a drunk person to one another that had them partially confused for someone else.

Damian's summary is just insulting and I feel bad for the character. "The cute, mean one", Damian, is not cute. I know he constantly looks 5 in some of the comics but that's because the artist sucks and can't draw a 13 year old. He's formerly killed people, been a bit of a sexist, and even currently tries and succeeds to kidnap people. Tim was nearly murdered by him, Dick has witnessed this or at least one of the attempts. And Dick treated Damian seriously during their relationship. He found Damian hard to get a break through in but he did. He tried so hard to get past Damian's walls to help him from his hideous disturbed past. Dick wouldn't just call him cute or find him cute, he'd see pride and a young man because even though he still has mess ups like a person he still got better despite all the horrible stuff he been through when raised by the League. On the other coin Tim was still uncomfortable to even be near him or trust him from their past experiences. That's a conflict. Neither one of them have a reason to find him cute let alone summarize him as that as if that's half of what he is when it isn't hardly at all, and don't list your source from a comic that knows them about as bad as you do, Thomas. Neither one of them would summarize him like a 6 year old neighbor boy who roasts them when they pass on daily walks and don't take very seriously. That's not their relationships at all. They been through too much together for that, either from better or to worst.

It feels more like Tom King read bad fan fictions and scrolled on tumblr more then actually read a comic, when he should, considering he's writing a real, professional, actually official DC comic. He showed a complete lack of care or any selfaware attitude in only a few panels.

All he did was summarize how they act when it's out of character, and like he was trying to get brownie points in his hated series by calling Damian cute, when that's not who the character is, and acting like they're oh so similar and "Aww poor babies they're so insecure :(" and they can be insecure but not like that. Tim may struggle and get sad over not knowing his spot, but Dick? Jason? They aren't the same character besides two differences each. It's like you're trying to write satire on some of the bad writers out there, but you aren't, you just are a bad writer.

Clay Mann literally draws them as the same character as well. I take it he came out the womb a grown man cuz he certainly seems like he's never seen a 16 year old before, even ignoring the fact Tim's at least suppose to have a baby face.

Tom King proved why he shouldn't have ever been the writer on a story with subject matter like this. A story build up to be a gripping tale into the subconsious of DC's characters and the effects of what happens in their life and mental illness in general, and he couldn't even understand either one.

You know for a series that acts like it even gets down to the nit and grit and saws through the bone marrow of mental illness like it's really deep. Promotes its self as so serious it deserves praise for it.

It really treats it's characters like jokes.

[useyernamesteven]

A Green Eyed Monster (Trimberly Writings)

I was just thinking about this today and I’ve tossed the idea around for a while but I don’t think I’m going to write this one out so instead I present you this.

Summary: There’s something about Tommie Oliver that has Kim seeing red flags. Maybe it’s the way she jokes around with Zack, or helps Billy with all his inventions, or the way Jason seems to trust her almost instinctively. Or maybe it’s the way she flirts with Trini and the sight makes Kim’s skin crawl with discomfort and just a smidge of jealousy. Maybe it’s the way Kim feels like she’s being replaced.

It’s been two months since they defeated Rita and became a closely knit family of misfits

They continue to defeat Rita’s putties whenever they randomly spring up and help rebuild the town and earn the trust of the people of Angel Grove

The hype has started to die down and things are finally looking normal for our five meta-human teens when a new girl appears on their cliff one day holding the green power coin

Her name is Tommie Oliver and she just moved into town with her father

She was out wandering the streets one night when she stumbled upon a green glowing rock and the next thing she knows is she’s waking up in her bed and she’s suddenly got super powers

The team’s wary of the new girl, what with their history with Rita and the coin, but Jason ultimately says that they need to at least try to accept Tommie into the group, after all she is a ranger

Trini is visibly upset and Kim remains suspicious and they talk alot about it that night when Kim sneaks into Trini’s room

The next week rolls by in a strange way

First Tommie seems to share almost every class with Trini and Kim’s surprised to see them sitting together at lunch that day, chatting and sharing food

And Kim’s not really sure what she’s feeling but every time Tommie makes Trini laugh or flirts with her she can’t help but shake this jealousy

She continues to tell herself it’s because she doesn’t trust Tommie yet and she’s just looking out for Trini like any platonic bestie would

Billy and Tommie bond over his inventions and the team learns that they’re making plans to build a robot together

Tommie proves to be an excellent fighter when they take her to the pit and she tells them that she knows several Mixed Martial Art styles

Kim finds Jason and Tommie talking strategy one afternoon and he goes so far as to let Tommie take the reins one training session

Kim crumbles a rock to dust when she catches Tommie with her hands on Trini’s hips as she “guides” her through a move

Kim confides in Zack because he’s still unsure about Tommie as well, but even that’s pointless because the next day before detention they come sauntering up together, joking around and play fighting

Kim remains wary of Tommie and the rest of the rangers try to convince her to give Tommie a chance

But she’s caught Tommie poking her nose around the ship and the mines where Rita built Goldar and she’s nervous Tommie might turn on them

And Tommie’s doing so well as a ranger Kim starts to doubt her own abilities and is constantly trying to one up Tommie, but the other girl remains three steps ahead of her

A random puttie attack occurs and they pull out their Zords (Tommie also has a Zord, it was just kept seperate from the others because they feared Rita could have gotten it)

During the attack Kim thinks she sees Tommie attacking Trini and immediately guns her down, ignoring Jason’s commands to help Billy

They barely defeat the putties and Billy ends up getting hurt because Kim wasn’t there to help him

Kim runs away once they put back the Zords, angered at herself and at Tommie, but the team catch up with her outside Krispy Kreme

Jason’s furious and he demands Kim explain herself and she blames Tommie, accusing her of sabotaging the mission

That’s when Trini steps in, defending Tommie and yelling at Kim

She’s pissed beyond belief that Kim doesn’t trust Tommie enough, saying that she’s just as much a ranger as any of them

Kim visibly shakes as Trini cusses her out, screaming that she’s still blaming everyone but herself and that she’s still the self-possessed mean girl she used to be, that she hasn’t changed and probably never will

Trini stalks off and Zack follows, equally pissed

Jason tells her that she’s benched from ranger duty and he pulls a torn Billy away from Kim, leaving her alone in the alleyway

Kim sobs and holds herself until the heat from her power coin becomes too much and she chucks it down the alley, hoping it shatters and she’s no longer a ranger

That’s when Tommie steps from the darkness and catches her coin

She walks toward Kim and stops to tower over her, flipping the pink power coin through the air carelessly

Kim tries to swallow her pride and apologize but she suddenly finds herself immobile and panic sets in when Tommie starts laughing

When she looks up Tommie’s disguise fades away and Rita stands in front of her, smiling wickedly before knocking Kim out

Kim wakes up at the docks in some abandoned warehouse tied down by metal chains

Rita explains how rangers in possession of another rangers coin can manipulate that rangers energy and she tells Kim that she’s going to use her to hurt her friends

“I won’t. I won’t hurt my friends!”

“Oh Pink... you won’t have a choice!”

The group are all gathered in the ship when the alarms start blaring and Alpha pulls up a live feed of an attack happening downtown

The creature attacking looks a little like Goldar in that they’re dripping gold but it’s human sized

Just then Tommie’s frantic voice comes over their communicators telling them she’s hurt

The team race into town and find Tommie with a small gash on her side and she tells them that the creature came out of no where and attacked her

Putties spring up and the team jump into action, pulling out their weapons to aid in the fight

Jason goes up against the golden monster and they spar with sword and scepter

Jason manages to get a good slice across the gold creatures chest and kicks it to the ground, preparing to stab it

But Billy jumps between them and pushes Jason back, telling him to stop

Billy saw for a brief moment when Jason cut through the gold that the thing underneath was bleeding

He knows theres someone trapped inside and that they can’t hurt an innocent person

The gold being jumps to it’s feet and grabs Billy and points their scepter at him and Jason holds his sword at the its throat, torn between listening to Billy’s pleas and protecting him

But that’s when Tommie slips up

She tells Jason to kill it, that it’s the only way to defeat Rita, and asks if he’s willing to watch Billy die again

And that’s when it clicks for him, because Tommie’s not supposed to know about Billy dying at the docks

All the rangers pick up on it and when they turn to Tommie, her disguise falls away and Rita’s standing there with her scepter and grinning madly

Zack and Jason react first but she uses her gold monster to protect herself and Billy tells them that theres someone trapped inside it

Trini is able to tackle Rita and the scepter out of her hand

As they tussle Rita pins Trini and crushes her throat, tells her to say goodbye to her little friends, but she’s distracted long enough for Jason to run her through with his sword

She sputters that this isn’t the end before light explodes around them and she disappears, leaving behind her scepter and two power coins

The gold being suddenly falls to their hands and knees and when the gold begins to melt away it reveals Kim gasping and wounded

The team instantly rush her back to the ship and they’re so worried they get into a huge argument with each other

Jason blames himself for hurting Kim and Zordon blames himself for not sensing Rita’s presence; Zack takes his mind off things and starts attacking sim putties, while Billy works with Alpha to help Kim

Trini disappears for a while and when she comes back she’s obviously been crying

Kim wakes up long enough to tell them that no one is to blame and that Rita had tricked all of them

Alpha tends to her wounds and Trini stays by her side the entire night

The next time Kim wakes up she finds Trini beside her, crying

She apologizes profusely for not believing Kim and calls herself an idiot for getting caught up in some girl’s attention

She confesses she liked the feeling of being wanted and how stupid she feels thinking that someone actually liked her

And without missing a beat Kim tells her she loves her

Trini’s jaw pops open and Kim admits to having feelings for the girl but being afraid that she wasn’t good enough for her

In a blink Trini’s kissing her senseless and telling her that she’s more than enough, that she really has changed, and that she loves Kim back

Bonus:

And of course, leave it to Zack to walk in not two seconds later and scream “CALLED IT!”

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

My head has been full of music...

"Get in the bed and try to love someone"

He says pit.

But i do bed... It so much to me and makes me happy. Try.

It don't matter if i fail. I have a whole video in my head... Tree shot it... Bed full of us in clothes... Turns into a boxing ring. Tree should post it. For Chandler and all my children. It was 2008. I had amnesia. So many people loved me and were there for me after i wanted to kill myself. Because i had failed at the best parts of life and became normal.

Try. Try. Just Try. Don't have to be good at it. Give it a good start.

Just try. That was all i had to do. Try.

Just be in the bed and use that old heart.

No sex. No cuddles. No Nothing.

Just try to be yourself and no one else. Just give it all your go. Your best to be you.

That is what Rock told me.

I was on medication but my head was clear and the medicine induced happiness due to the raising of serotonin levels.

So i remember. How i happy i felt to be given that chance to be Me. How i was wanted and expected to only be myself as best as I could be. No matter what that was.

...

So NHRA i wanted to clarify, the $2500 match from me plus the $2500 match from the NHRA is for any employee

If you gotta scrape under the couch with a few friends to gather up the initial $2500 that's fine.

If you want to give out $200 per person that walks by a camera store any where in the world*. We have Abu that can assist you, free of charge to you. Magic Tree has been dying to get in on this, so he wants to pay the Abu.

So the Abu can assist you in any way to help you give your gifts of cash from the heart. Just let us know.

Alex, NHRA. Mark will tell Saint Luches whom will make a job posting for a specially selected group of Abu that are proud, honest and need this kind of job in their life. They were hand selected by the Tree and Alex will give an email to send your needs to and it goes straight to the tree whom will update and clarify your needs and post it in the system.

The Abu will get an email of the new website and log in so check that out hopefully you were selected.

So y'all get outta the bed and try to love someone.

*lucky for you i was given the gift of the Tree of Knowledge for my 2008 graduation present from the University of New Mexico. So you don't have to look up every camara shop in the world. The Tree of Knowledge will provide a list to each area Abu and hire Abu for each camera store. So you'll need to say "Saturdays is the day i want every week so it's consistent. So people can get rumors and go every week" or you say "i want to give the most randomly. I dont want to give to people that will come by again" So, tree Will calculate the future without changes or if he knows a change will occur in a certain area he will calculate those dates. So it takes less than a millisecond and he can do the whole world in that time and then less than 3 seconds later have the jobs all posted seperate.

So you just need to tell him where, how much, who and what you feel you want.

Like if camaras are your thing and you wanna help with diapers and be a consistent dollar supplier so you do every Sunday $10 from 6 am to 8 pm but you want to really help people randomly so yoh do $200 on the dates he says will be best at the times.

If your goal is to help keep camera shops in operation, then the Abu will notify the store clerk when a customer is making purchase to notify him/her and they will then give a card to apply to the bill to buy more accessories they were going to wait go buy later. Because waiting till they come out wirh a bag is great but letting them buy more that day while they're telling themselves why they have to wait to buy that one thing they crave but had to put back on the shelf...

That helps the shop keeper and changes the day dramatically for the shopper. Then they leave will a full package and the to do list is smaller -- get behind the lens and frame a bitch.

So if you would like the tree to decide for you you can allow that. If you want to be specific about the receivers or how it's going to be done you can do that. If you want him to brainstorm for you. He can and will.

I do require you do give away by your own hands. I am not going to list and bla bla rules I just want to remind you that's one of the reasons you want to do this.

To change a face. To change a day. For a moment in time be who you are, the best you can be.

So to have the Abu do it at the fee of $60 per hour the tree pays as i am under the deep hit man kill number and aren't paying all CIA Abu for extra events. The Tree has agreed to pay for Super Special Events in 2008. This falls under Chandler's Love Rule of never too much love in the world. So there's never too much money either.

It's additional impact of the gift of cash and love to have the Abu earn such a high amount to make people smile.

But its to impact the heart of each NHRA employee.

Steven Torrence. Greg Anderson. A few others already had heart attacks for lack of love.

Jason Line, Mark says, isn't doing to well. Hes about 9 months away from a coronary failure.

My anchors. They aren't only strong and wise. They also need love, too.

That's why I still have them in my Instagram news feed.. Some i could unfollow but others. I just couldn't. They needed love, too. For me it was evident.

So they most need to hand deliver gifts every work weekend.

The angry. The violent. Even if it's just $50 per person on The plane you have the airline attendant pass out with drinks. You will see and hear and feel the change within that plane. And its random but also slightly guided by God. Some greedy will miss their flight just because Jason Line was handing out $300 per person on a flight just to hear a smile in his heart.

And with the match there is plenty of money.

....

And any celebrity or rich person can join in a pledge of a lump sum to be divided. The $2500 or more is you to you. If they want to do a certain way or cause they can join in one already created or suggest to someone who hasn't yet figured out a way to do it or wants a change from the usual way they're using the Abu.

One of my kids, Jamamima, (jah-my-mah -- the a is a short a vowel sound. More like uh. Juh-my-muh would be better if you don't know the long and short vowels) posted the email to the tree so this way you can ask to join in. And if someone is brainstorming, the Tree of Knowledge can add your idea to someone He feels is a match to.

You can remain anonymous if you wish. Or let only the people you're working with (including the Abu) know who you are. Or let every One know. Or all the above according to Your level.

So email if you want the cards printed a certain way because that will change who you will pair with. If you want to have a photo background of the enablers of the free people in the world to not Rob banks then it changes who you will work with. Especially if you want a series of dinner photos and sight seeing photos.

What kind of cause you want. Schools. Children so near toy stores or museums or other child advertised places. Moms. Dads. Fire fighters. Hospitals. Lots of things can be bought online in a hospital. Now days if they're tired of hospital food, they can call up uber eats on a Visa gift card.

The particular style of gift giving you want. Every holiday a hospital in your favorite city. Or every 3rd Tuesday all children's hospitals in The world.

Or tree or NHRA employee choice.

How's it looking, now, Chandler?

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Miracle Magic

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/EiW9DST

by Samael8216

This fic comes from the amalgamation of constant MariBat binge reading as a coping mechanism, Its a Sibling Daminette AU, in which they where seperated while in the league. Damian was trained to be the next head, like normal, while Marinette was supposed to be trained in magic, having a connection to the magic of the pits.

The story also takes a canon divergence from the Miracle Queen episode, with it ending roughly the same but with Hawkmoth being revealed and the peacock being retrieved.

As for the DC side of it im not all that versed outside of MariBat fics and the UTRH movie, Jason Todd is probably the best bat and I am not arguing it.

Im only going to use the Shanghai Miraculous Special because the new york one is literally just the DCU but miraculous-ified, Ive seen some good fics that use both, namely the 'Marinettes Trust Issues' fic but I dont think I'd do it justice enough.

Words: 1233, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Miraculous Ladybug

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Talia al Ghul, Ra's al Ghul, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Gabriel Agreste, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir

Additional Tags: Post-Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth Identity Reveal, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Bruce Wayne is Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug's Biological Parent

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/EiW9DST

[hgfstreamchats]

All Hallows’ Eve Stream

Hello! Also I AM getting the video What a good costume Testing, testing. Everything's fine over here! No, not the pumpkin! ...Can you see ME or is kast messing up in a new(?) and wonderful way I can see you, but only on a seperate console. That's... baffling. I'll reload There we are! Oh, Kast. Okay, there it is. ...Tell me I'm not invisible again. Oh no, I see you. Ahhh, good! Now that's real horror. Eh, it's probably better for him anyway. I'm sure it'll all work out. It'll be fien. Man, that room is HUGE Solid advice. If Prime had won the war. *shudder* I'm sure it'll be fine. Also fine. Soundwave gets along fine. Really, why did they even have forks ...Well, that's going to bother me forever. Subtle! Very! Who wrote THAT book It's very specific. Ugh. ... This is worse than anything in the episode itself. Does he.  think he's going to be able to eat that Got to admire his ambition, though. I'm questioning how he got it in or out of the house at all "Earth capital" sounds like something I would have believed and could still be convinced to. Heh. I'm still hung up over those Latin puns, those were clever. Hello all! Hi!

Hm new streaming site, never heard of this one It's totally awesome and not at all buggy. Zephra human! Hi Knock Out! I finally made it to a stream! Excellent! That just raises further questions! Nice save. Very nice. Ewww. sooo has the video started now? Try reloading It, uh.  It does that 'Cause I'm not getting anything on my end, I did that, I turned off my adblock and refreshed Or try clicking the leave button (top, to the right of the settings button) and coming back in Okay I'll try that How meta. So...the multiverse? ... Nope still nothin' I'm gonna try switching browsers Kast is a wretched thing. I'm on chrome I DO remember having this problem with Rabbit too, something about my adblock/settings wasn't letting me load video WHELP apparently Kast doesn't support Firefox at ALL, soo fun times Is a non-Firefox browser an option? I've only got Chrome and Firefox Don't you love how you have to have 4 different browsers installed for different websites that have different requirements for some reason? Oh yeah LOVE it It works on chrome for me, although not always on the first try My emulator's using chrome. Oh, THIS one Okay I'm gonna try messing around with my extensions and crossing my fingers Ha! Oh nice! The first one I turned off worked! I HAVE VIDEO WOO GLORIOUS! Woo! He didn't come in through the door... He came in through the living room Way to punch that ten-year old in the face, Hibbert Like they didn't already know. Doctor of the year. Truly. top 10 anime betrayals They know about the waffle incident. what a turn! Why is Dr Fink the only character that has a tiny counterpart? I mean, you can't prove he is She's not forcing them to barter for their dead children, she's already doing a better job than Primus. AH THIS ONE HAS ONE OF MY FAVOURITE JOKES That was mine. classic The best kind of conspiracy! The biggest hitch in their plan is that Homer would ever choose rum over beer True. The fish eyes make it. Still true Hah! TWIRLING TWIRLING TWIRLING T'WARDS FREEDOM FAVE Seconded! Other favorite! WHoopsie! Well, that's what elections are for! I remember that joke going over my head as a kid Alright, onto Rifftrax! 'why is NOT voting for the evil choses throwing your vote away?' *choices Hmmm Oh I thought it was one of those where it's just the sound and you're supposed to synch it up Vincent Price! These guys are sapping the fun out of having a chat open They keep riffing when WE'RE the ones who should be riffing A little, maybe We always find a way to slip in a few. True This is the setup to a murder mystery. If Opera has taught me anything watch out for the chandelier AHAAAAAAAAAAA "Why haven't you killed them yet, it's been five WHOLE minutes" There's an established population of Vincent Price humans living in the hills to this day. She def has the 'I'm on my own fourth husband and they all died from mysterious circumstances' 'Lol first degree murder jokes, the staple of any solid marriage' One of these characters is absolutely going to kill the other. I *was* joking, but... Yyyyeah. '... And welcome to Jackass' "haha it's almost like you're trying to reenact it or something" Just leave your hand there I love how he's like 'charming' when dude's being macabre like he hasn't been nothing but unsettling since he came onscreen Ew indeed. I love how she's all 'meh' about mysterious blood dripping on her out of nowhere "See, we even kept the acit fro some reason" You never know when you might need an acid vat. Waste not, want not. Why are you entertaining this jackass girl I'm secretly expecting no ghosts at all Just murder. Exactly I'm expecting no ghosts or they're all ghosts. Wait I'm changing my guess There ARE ghosts but exactly zero of them are killing people Oh right, that's the one from Scariest Movie Moments of All Time despite being no such thing. That's right hit on the host's wife that'll win you points at this party Try not to be TOO disappointed about not getting into her pants, Lance "you're going to be the star corpse!" fcuk my nose made a WEIRD snort at that 'does she miss being scared' joke Running and screaming was probably the right call to make. Tiny little coffins Hah! Wee little coffins. Sheesh. So the idea is they all kill each other trying to get a larger prize, huh. I'm sure the police would have no questions for them afterwards. Absolutely none. Yes, yes, you want to murder one another, we get it. NOT AT ALL Better get back to the scotch Still trying ot get laid eh Lance run at her with a severed head, THAT'LL CALM HER DOWN Nice knife dude There's very little haunting going on in this house. Clearly false advertising If they're doing karaoke they have to do some Scissor Sisters 'I CAN'T DECIDE WHETHER YOU SHOULD LIVE OR DIE~' Pfff 'OH YOU'LL PROBABLY GO TO HEAVEN' 'PLEASE DON'T HANG YOUR HEAD AND CRY~' Oh NOW you're all suspicious and have questions about this bizzare situation Right? I'm half expecting they ARE actually all conected in weird roundabout ways ala The Clue Movie If the singing telegram lady doesn't show up I'm going to be bitterly disappointed. Same She's really just freaking out because it wasn't scotch Someone spilled wine in the room above. The real horror is the cleaning bill. ... the video being a butt for anybody else right now? Working okay for me mine was laggy and now it's totally frozen The sound's a little desynched but then it always is Oof I'll try refreshing if it's just me Well, that's not weird Okay looks alright now And finally, we have a ghost! if she was REALLY DEAD TO BEGIN WITH OOOOH I'm kind of leaning towards actual ghosts now, since otherwise I'm not sure how that rope trick would work maybe the same way the movie did it ...okay, fair point ...Actually I assume the movie could've done it by, like, pulling along on a thread and hiding the person pulling it via camera angles OHHHHHHHHHH DID I CALL IT You did! YYYYYYYEAH Yes let's spend as much time as possible in the acid room Never a dull moment in the acid room. okay so like why bother disposing of the body? Right? you didn't kill him, there was no direct evidence of your involvment That just raises MORE questions yes, move closer And then a skeleton popped out! Ha! BITCH IT'S A SKELETON WOULD YOU BE SCARED OF CALISTA FLOCKART? Covered in acid, though That is absolutely how those things work, I'm sure ...Hang on, what about the body the guy dumped in the pit the strings being visible actually being part of the plot is the biggest twist in this thing WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST ON GETTING AS CLOSE AS POSSIBLE TO THE ACID VAULT?? To see the magical acidic secrets within! Skeleton - By Himself But is David S Pumpkins here! He will be, like scrap I'm letting this night go by without showing him. lolol Murderous animatronics? THAT'S never been done before "yeah I have some questions" Just a few. Deep lore! Well I'm certaily scared *certainly Aren't we all? How could you not be! Freddy Who? Jason whatshisname? All hasbeens compared to... Alright! Anything you'd like to see before we close out? If not, I'm content to close out on David Pumpkins. OOOOOOHHH DAVID S. PUMPKINS Any questions? I'm good, I need to do some dishes anyway Thanks for the stream, Knock Out! I gueeeess I should get dinner Thank you for coming! Always a delight to have you! Say hi to the fam for me, and happy Halloween! Thanks for hosting!  It's been... a treat. :) Of course! Happy Halloween! And to you!