#The one angst song I have with them keeps playing on the playlist

[heyhollow]

jeremike but it's that one dog photo

He loves his rotting bf

[blkkizzat]

❛ MY SHORTY ALWAYS ON SOME BULLSHIT LIKE CHICAGO ❜

PART 2

part of the 420 'We Be Burnin' series

⋙ MENU ITEM: PLUG!CHOSO x SORORITYBRAT!READER ⋙ PART 1 | PART 2 (IN STOCK NOW!!) | PART 3 (coming soon!)

⋙ product description (summary): okay so you finally realized how badly you fucked up. but is it too late? will choso even talk to you now? has he moved on for good or is it that you now have to worry about someone else moving onto him? ⋙ side effects (tw): more drama. more angst. teasing. jealousy. thirsting. mentions of sex and oral sex. intoxication with drug & alcohol use. sending nudes. y/n is still a brat. bitchy sorority sisters. party culture. ⋙ thc levels (wc): 8.2k ⋙ inventory notes (a/n): best viewed in dark mode. i appreciate y'all liking this sm hope you don't mind i split this up more, but the second part was getting too unruly in length lol

Plug!Choso who you thought forgetting about would be relatively easy. Overwhelmed with the sheer amount of new presidential duties, you had no shortage of various meetings to keep you occupied. Even so, Choso had a way of popping into your mind as the most routine things would remind you of him. 

You couldn’t go get a fresh set of nails without expecting to see his tinted blacked-out sedan parked outside waiting for you. Scrolling socials had also become annoying as you’d see a post and immediately want to send it to Choso— your sorority sisters would think you were gross if you sent them mukbang videos. You couldn’t even bake anything anymore, especially anything chocolate, without reminding yourself of how much Yuji hated nuts in his chocolate chip cookies. 

Or even now when you had been walking across campus with your sisters and chatting about the massive proposal plan of next year’s sorority activities. A daunting task on its own which you had to submit to your national chapter by the end of the month. In fact, there were a lot of tedious things you realized you’d now be responsible for as president. 

However, all of that flew out of your mind when a car sped by blasting a familiar rock song— one that Choso always played. 

Stopping in your tracks you whipped your head around but the music was coming from a completely different car. The disappointment in your chest felt like you were suffocating.

The song was the first one from Choso’s ‘stoner emo boy playlist’ that you’d actually admitted you liked so he made sure to play it whenever you came around. You didn’t think you were official enough to have a song, but it felt like you did when you’d heard it just now. 

Although what pained you more in the moment was the fact Choso hadn’t even bothered to text you since the day of the brunch. Your pride and guilt kept you from texting him initially but after the first week you caved and did what you once thought was unthinkable— texting a guy first. 

You’d thought he’d answer instantly, happy you’d finally forgiven him for nearly ruining your brunch and you did want to apologize for missing Yuji’s game. But when 20 minutes turned into an hour and an hour turned into the entire day you realized he was ignoring you.

Choso was a dealer. 

He always had his phone on him. In fact, Choso used to respond to you so fast you wondered if he’d always kept your messages up on his screen.

The seriousness hits home when more of your texts go unanswered as the days go by. 

You huffed. 

Two weeks had passed since you first reached out and apparently Choso was still giving you the cold shoulder. Unconsciously chewing on your manicured french tips, your intrusive thoughts paint the absolute worst scenarios. 

This was around the time of day he’d usually be on campus and you’d meet up in the empty garage. 

Would he be there now doing another deal? 

Or giving ‘discounts’ to another girl?

You shook your head. Choso wasn’t like that. 

You knew he wasn’t.

Then again he had stuffed your guts in less than 10 minutes of knowing each other.

But you were the exception right? Choso wouldn’t move on just like that, would he? 

Rejection wasn’t something you had dealt with often in your life or well, ever. 

You’d gotten everything you wanted since you were little whether it was something you worked for or something given to you. 

So what if you didn’t have Choso?

You should be content with life. 

You had everything you’d ever wanted right now. 

You were pretty, got damn near perfect grades and now had the title of sorority president for fuckssake! 

Meeting someone like Choso was never part of your plans and didn’t fit into them either, so you had never really considered what the both of you were to be anything long-term. 

Nor did you ever stop to consider what he thought of your relationship. 

You thought he’d lick his wounds for a few days and forgive you. However with each passing day the thought he might really be done with you sinks in more and more.

Regardless of the legion of frat guys who would jump at the chance to date you, the only guy you really wanted right now apparently wanted fuck all to do with you. 

Ok so maybe you deserve the silent treatment. 

A lot. 

You never been that big of a bitch to him before. But you really had panicked when he showed up out of the blue with your parents on the way! Also if he didn’t go and threaten the DJ like he did???

You sighed. 

No, even under more peaceful circumstances the end result was you weren’t going to leave to go to Yuji’s game. You couldn’t blame him for being furious with you as you knew how protective he was of his younger brother but you at least wish he’d hear you out.

Just for one last time and maybe you could make it up to Yuji too? 

Get him a nice gift for missing his little league game and bake him chocolate chip cookies—without the nuts. You wanted to hear him adorably ramble on which would always be accompanied by animated hand movements while he gave you the rundown. Yuji often roped in Choso as well, who would be all too happy to play whatever role or prop Yuji needed him for. 

Their identical grins, goofy and filled with joy never failed to put a smile on your face. A smile which came easy as there was never any demands put on you when you were with them. No pretending for the sake of appearances, no worrying about social standing and no expectations for favors. 

With them you were just you and they had accepted you.

But had you accepted them? 

Shit. 

Yeah you had fucked up big. 

You knew you needed to talk to Choso and if you weren’t all but certain Choso would slam the door in your face, you’d have half a mind to go pop up at his house. 

Although maybe if Yuji ans—

“—Like HELLO!? Earth to Prez!”

Your train of thought abruptly comes to an end when one of your sorority sisters—Brianna—rudely snaps their fingers in your face. 

Bitch. 

She’d been bitter ever since she’d lost the presidency to you. 

Elections were over so you didn't have to worry about staying on everyone's good side like you had been doing for the last 3 years of being super sweet and non confrontational. Even so, snatching up a fellow sister certainly wouldn’t make a good impression for a newly appointed president.

“What IS it Brie!?” 

Turning to face her you had no choice but to keep your cool.

“Don’t give me attitude! You’re the one not paying attention, space case.”  

Brianna huffed accusingly. 

“Yeah, Brie’s kinda right Prez, you’ve been a little bit distracted lately.” 

Another one of your sisters chimed in—immediately looking down when your eyes narrowed on her.

“Don't tell me the pressure is already getting to ‘Little Miss Legacy'? Or—”

Brianna flips her hair with a sly smile before continuing.

“—is it just that you miss your burnout stalker boy?” 

“E-Excuse me!?”

Extremely disarmed by the allegation, you were not expecting in a million years the very person you were thinking of to be brought up like this by Brianna of all people. 

“You know—you’ve been acting off since the brunch a few weeks ago and we used to be practically swimming in za—way more o’s than we paid for. You must have been doing something to get all that from that future convict and he must be pretty pissed with you if you haven’t been able to get anymore since.”

The rest of your sisters were gagged at the accusations Brianna was tossing your way as it was true that your supply had been dwindling. Their eyes darted between the two of you but mostly focused on you waiting for your response. 

You ignore them though as all your ire was on Brianna.

This whore had some fucking nerve speaking about Choso like that. 

The thought of knocking the smug look off Brianna’s face is almost too tempting —presidency be damned. 

Yet your own guilt stops you.

Too little, much too late for you to be standing up for Choso now the way you had dismissed him so harshly in front of Brianna and the rest of your sisters just a few weeks ago. You could only be mad at yourself, your own actions showed them how to treat Choso.

That didn’t mean you were going to let her get away with it without a proper lashing though. 

“Listen—Brie, Little Miss Legacy is busy juggling the presidency, a 3.8 gpa, volunteer work and planning every goddamn sorority event worth attending. As for you? Well I heard you’d been pretty busy these days juggling your creepy ass T.A. Noaya’s balls because you were going to fail Biology again for the third time—so do you really want to talk about pressure or whose fucking whom for what?”

Standing up for yourself wasn’t something you ever did in an effort to be likable and so Briana, as well as the rest of your sisters, were stunned into silence. 

Even if her fucking for grades had been no secret, it wasn’t something anyone talked about out loud and yet you’d gladly air her out again for insulting Choso.

“Urgh, whatever! Anyways while you were daydreaming we were planning Jeremy's birthday party on Saturday.”

You rolled your eyes at the inattention to some random frat guy’s bday being the reason for this whole confrontation.  

“Oookay and—?”

“—and we need you to get some more za from your stalk— er um, I mean your plug...” 

Brianna quickly corrects herself seeing your eyes flare.  

“Jermey wants a joint filled pinata and we don’t have nearly enough right now to roll all those joints.”

You suck your teeth in annoyance. 

Of course it all had to come back around to Choso.

“I’m not talking to him right now. We’ll find someone else.” 

Well it was half true, more like he wasn’t talking to you. 

You tried not to pout and completely give yourself away at how much it really was affecting you.

“Well start again, Prez! You know his stuff is the best!”

“We already promised everyone we’d have it!” 

“Please Prez!”

The rest of your sorority sisters chimed in.  

“Yeah Prez it shouldn’t be a problem. Send him an ass pic or something, I bet he would respond to that.” 

The rest of your sisters giggled in agreement. 

Little did they know you had already sent Choso nudes 8 days ago, which when you checked Snap last just 10 minutes ago he still hadn’t opened yet. 

You’d die before admitting that though.

“Fine. I’ll figure it out.” 

“Knew you would Prez!” 

Brianna tossed you a fake smile as she turned around and your sisters followed suit walking back towards the sorority house. The chatter now moves on to drink options as the previous conversation is instantly forgotten. 

You still flip the bitch off behind her back though before you catch up to join the conversation lest these dumb bitches skimp out on drinks for more decorations and have you all drinking Monarch vodka again—gross, much more so than a mukbang video.

Plug!Choso who later that night has you laying on your bed staring at your phone suspended over you, your finger hovering over the send button. 

What if he ignored you this time too? 

Worse—what if he had finally blocked you?

Well all your messages had gone through so far even though his read receipts were off. 

Choso hadn’t blocked you yet. 

Only two days had passed since you last texted him but scrolling through your history the wall of blue taking over the entire screen had you feeling vexed.

Hadn’t Choso punished you enough? 

Biting your lip in apprehension you hit send. 

You almost dropped your phone on your face. Sitting up in your bed you stare at his text incredulously as the sticker shock of Choso jacking up the price by $150 hits you.

You deserved that, you supposed. 

But fuck you knew you’d have to come up out of pocket yourself for the extra and you couldn’t admit to your sisters why the price had gone up so much again.

At least he was answering you though. 

You threw your phone across your bed. 

Well that went super. 

You’d hope you’d have the chance to talk about things while he was responding to you, maybe get him to video call you? You knew he still wouldn’t be thrilled with you but you didn’t expect his responses to be that short once he finally answered. 

Choso always over texted you if anything, sending paragraphs at times so these clipped messages were like tiny daggers pricking you with each one you received.  

You didn’t think you could handle him being mean to you like this for much longer. 

Getting a taste of your own medicine fucking sucked.

With a sigh you had decided to push it to the back of your mind. It was Tuesday and he wasn’t even coming until Friday.

That’s when you realized Choso implied he was coming to you. 

As in your sorority house. 

On Friday. 

The night of the Barbie’s Dreamhouse Kegger. 

Goddamnit.

Plug!Choso who shows up to your sorority house on Friday night just before midnight when the kegger is at its peak. Choso doesn’t give a single fuck this time around that he sticks out like a sore thumb with his dark tattered jeans, matching leather jacket, heavy eyeliner and metal piercings amongst all the colorful and peppy pastel attired party-goers. 

Choso waltzes right through the front door like he owns the place.

“Oh! It's you! Finally!” 

Flipping her hair behind her to show off her ample cleavage, your sorority sister Brianna bounces over to Choso who continues to look past her as his eyes scan the foyer.

To be honest he wasn’t even sure she was talking to him until she mentioned you.

“You’re the plug, right? Choso? Here for Prez, hmm?” 

Brianna appraised Choso with a flirty glance and a smile. 

“I’m Brianna, but everyone calls me Brie. She’s outside with her boys! I’ll take you there, kay?”

Her boys?

Brianna batts her eyes sweetly to complement her peppy demeanor. 

Choso simply nods, appearing unphased as Brianna grabs him by the arm of his jacket to lead him through the sea of people crowding the hall and out to the backyard. The very same backyard where you had rejected and humiliated him to save your own superficial social standing just a few weeks ago. 

Of course he hadn’t forgotten. 

Choso noted this time though the expansive yard had a completely different vibe from the pretentious scene he’d walked into before. The backyard was now filled with pink inflatable decorations and rose gold plastered party supplies, trading the expensive crystal for matching pink solo cups and decorative flower displays for shotskis. 

Yet Choso’s comparisons end once he finally spots you in the crowd. 

Playing beer pong with some frat fucks, carefree like you had zero concerns (or thoughts of him) in the world as you taunted your opponents. 

Choso’s eyes narrow when you—clad in a scandalously small pink sparkly tube top—brought a dainty manicured nail to your chest and seductively dragged it down your cleavage to tug at the hem of the fabric. The tops of your tits swell over the edge of the material provocatively as you tease the chance they might altogether spill out onto the table if you pulled any lower.

The plan worked and your opponents thoroughly distracted missed their shots much to your amused squeals and Choso’s growing irritation. His brow twitched as he noticed the rest of your outfit which barely provided any more coverage. 

The matching mini skirt you wore rested low enough on your curvy hips to show the very edges of your thong but high enough on your thighs that your cheeks were nearly peeking out just from the slight bend you took as you aimed to take your next shot. Your pink jeweled belly ring (that he’d bought you) and gem adorned nude fishnets lead down to chunky hot pink glitter pumps only calling more attention to your lower half as they were illuminated by the outdoor tiki lights.

Why were you dressed like such a slut and letting those greasy shitheads drool all over you? 

Your beer pong partner was clearly exaggerating his drunkenness for an excuse to feel you up as his hand rested dangerously close to the top of your ass as you took your next shot. 

Were you that clueless?

Choso’s jaw clenches as you allow yourself to be pulled in by the shoulder tits first into a celebratory hug after landing a cup off a bounce, thus removing two. The way you’d casually let those assholes gawk and grab at you when you wouldn’t even make eye contact with him in public pisses him off like none other and reminds him why he had decided to cut you off after all.

This time though Choso doesn’t march over, masking his resentment with nonchalance as he considers leaving altogether. 

Sure he needed the money—but it wouldn’t make or break him in the long run. 

Keeping the big picture in mind, Choso had Yuji to think of and he couldn’t afford to catch a case over your slutty ass if he actually gave into the urge to knock some random frat fucker’s teeth out.

Yet Choso switches his attention back to Brianna when she returns with a beer filled cup for him and her sheer top unbuttoned even lower. 

Oh? 

Choso grins. 

Plug!Choso who you finally notice standing near the back door of your sorority house next to—Brianna?!…urgh! 

Her obnoxious high-pitched laughter loudly cut through the music and party chatter to draw your attention over. 

What the hell was Choso even doing with her?! 

You grit your teeth as Choso takes the drink. You watch as he reclines against the house and cheers cups together. Brianna is twirling her hair innocently as she flirts with him, giggling like an idiot. 

One without an ounce of shame at that. 

You seethe as she clutches onto his bicep pulling herself closer and resting her tits on his arm when she pretends to momentarily lose her balance. 

Stupid cunt ass bitch. 

You know it's just to spite you too. 

Of course Brianna still didn’t know of the true nature of your relationship with Choso for certain but a backstabbing whore like her would try to fuck him solely off an inkling. 

If anything just so she could say your ‘stalker’ was now hers.

She was just using him! Did Choso not see that?! 

Your beer pong partner slides his arm around you to tell you it’s your turn again but you don’t even spare him a backwards glance as you shrug him off. Abandoning the game and ignoring his puzzled calls after you. 

Truthfully it doesn’t even register as you are on your warpath with Choso and Brianna in your sights, stomping directly towards them like you were on a mission. You were too, as far as you were concerned, determined to break that shit up expeditiously. 

Especially now as you see Brianna airdropping her contact info to Choso.

Stopping directly in front of them you’re far too tipsy to prevent your souring mood from spreading all over your face when they both seem to not notice you right away.  

You loudly clear your throat.

“AHEM!”

Staring at Choso expectantly your lip curls when it's Brianna who greets you first instead.

“Oh Prez, my B girly! We didn’t notice you there!” 

“Whatever, Brie.”

You sneer at her. 

Although Brianna only giggles again, feigning innocence and leaning into Choso a bit more. 

The whore was still touching up on him.

“I was just keeping Cho here company until we found you.”

Bullshit, they were searching fo– Hol’ the fuck up—CHO?! 

Did this whore just call him Cho?! 

That was your fucking nickname for him! Only you and Yuji were allowed to call him that!

Oh Brianna was just begging for that ass whooping, dying for it even. 

Swaying on your feet, your buzz only intensifies your anger and folding your arms in front of you serves two purposes at the moment: 

To keep your balance as you try to prevent your heels from sinking into the grass— but more importantly— because the urge to yank a bitch was escalating to the point your hands were now twitching. 

You had drank way too much in your nervousness waiting for Choso.  

You thought a quick round of beer pong would settle your anxieties as you’d been hanging out near the front door all day and night not knowing when he’d show up. However time had slipped away from you and one game had turned into three. 

You didn’t even really know the guys you were playing with, just some random freshman!

Of course once you finally let your guard down Choso would not only show up but be hanging out with your biggest opp!

But what really had you about to crack—Choso was taking his sweet time in acknowledging you as he appeared to be more concerned with checking Brianna’s contact info than speaking to you right in front of him. “Ight, got it.” 

Choso confirmed and slid his phone back into his jacket before pulling out a joint as he finally made eye contact with you.

THE FUCK!? HE ACTUALLY SAVED IT?! 

Plug!Choso who stares at you with a condescending smirk as his eyes twinkled with sadistic amusement before exhaling smoke towards the sky.

You bite your cheek to hold back your angry tears, you weren’t about to give Brianna the satisfaction. She could fuck right the hell off as far as you were concerned, only wanting to speak to Choso who was currently looking at you like you were the one interrupting something.

“W-Why didn't you text me you were here?! I would have come outside!” 

Your words fumble out of you drunkenly, not sounding one bit as smooth and unbothered as you hoped.

“For why tho? Don’t you have me silenced anyway, Prez?”

You stiffened. 

Even if he wasn’t silenced right now you couldn’t deny you had previously silenced him before the last few weeks of trying to get him to talk to you. 

“Yea figured—so thought it’d be best to come inside…”

Choso exhales smoke through his nose this time, leering down at you as he passes the joint to Brianna who eagerly takes it.

“You really think I’m still tryna wait for you?”

Choso’s words are crushing as the double meaning behind them is not lost on you. Parting your glossed lips you couldn’t even form a sentence as your mouth had gone completely dry.

Brows raised Choso is practically daring you to challenge him. 

But you’re frozen. 

Ironic, because his eyes are all but intensely burning into yours as his accusingly cruel question penetrated you like a hot knife to butter. 

However, bringing you back, Brianna interrupts the moment—because of course she does—not being able to read the damn room nor handle the attention being away from her for 5 fucking seconds.

“You know Prez… You’re going to be pretty busy with all your responsibilities soon...”

Brianna taps her stiletto shaped nail to her lips in faux contemplation. Her smarmy expression gives away her true intentions resembling every bit of the evil bitch she is. 

“...Annnnnd it won’t look good for our lovely new president to put herself at risk by getting us drugs, right? Sooooo, I was telling Cho here how I’m going to be the one taking over for you now.”

Brianna coyly tucks a few loose strands of her long tawny locks behind her ear. 

“Who knows? I might be able to get a better discount than you too.”

Passing the blunt back to Choso she winks at him. Choso merely chuckles, shaking his head at the implications before taking another hit.

And yeah that’s what fucking did it alright.

More than ready to give Brianna exactly what the fuck she’d been asking for you wordlessly lunge forward to snatch her up by those raggedy ass microlink extensions she couldn’t stop touching.

However your trajectory is thrown when you feel Choso grab you by your wrist. Pulling you in towards him, the action confused both you and Brianna—who didn’t know how close she was to actually kissing dirt.

Choso passes the joint back to Brianna, telling her to keep it as a ‘sample’ he turns his attention back towards you.

“Come on Prez, I got places to be. Get me my money now before I charge your ass the full stack.”

You both leave Brianna standing there dumbfounded as Choso drags you back into the house. 

Plug!Choso guides you through the crowd of your sisters that are all now much too drunk and self-involved in their own good time to care about the pierced n’ scary dark haired man towing their president behind him. 

Reaching the staircase Choso motions for you to go ahead of him and you nod dumbly as you obediently climb the stairs trying not to trip. 

Urging you along, Choso is right on your tail— quite literally, as he tries to simultaneously avoid staring at your ass cheeks jiggling out from under your skirt—but more importantly tries to keep any other wandering eyes below from getting a peek as well. 

Choso places a hand on your waist, both to keep you from falling and to move you along quicker. Warm tingles radiate out from where his hands touch your bare skin yet he instantly releases you once you reach the top.

You can’t help but to pout at the loss of contact.

“Which one?”

Choso still feels all business though as he walks ahead of you like he can’t wait to wrap this up and get you the fuck out of his life again.

Plug!Choso who you usher into your room before closing the door. The party seems distant as only the faint sounds of the base bumping against the walls reach the sanctuary of your room. Still holding the knob you’re leaning with your back against the doorframe as your body is still pumping insane amounts of adrenaline through you. 

Nearly fighting Brianna, Choso finally touching you, on top of being drunk had your mind going into overdrive especially since it seemed like Choso would leave as soon as the deal was over.

Would he really take the money and go just like that?

Choso’s face is unreadable as he strolls deeper into your room and casually looks around. You had always come over to his place and he would have never in a million years dreamed of being able to see your room in your actual sorority house. 

It was so you though. 

Tidy and adorned in your favorite colors, your walls are decorated with pictures of celebrities, friends and various moodboards. Not to mention it smelled like you. The scent of your sugary perfume with notes of vanilla and saffron assaulted Choso's senses making it seem a bit warmer in the room than it actually was.

“Yo Prez, the money.” 

His patience for the situation is dwindling. He has to get out and fast. 

Choso doesn’t know what he’ll do if he doesn’t leave soon.

Yet you were plotting the exact opposite and you couldn’t let him leave so easily now that you finally had him alone after all this time. 

Armed with a plan you nod as you scoot by him and over to your vanity to retrieve the cash. Acting clueless as to which drawer you put it in, you search them all as you bend over to check one of the drawers at the very bottom. 

Choso swallows hard.

Your ass–with plenty of curves to spare–is on display for him as well as your sheer pink thong that teasingly pokes out between your crystal studded fishnets. 

You had to be doing this on purpose. 

Swishing side to side your skirt raises up a bit higher with every shift of your hips while your thong strains tighter across the print of your fat pussy lips threatening to snap altogether.

Akin to a seductive pendulum as you sway before Choso completely entrancing him. 

Only you could ever affect him in this way.

After what feels like years do you finally locate the money, a sizable stack of cash composed of 20 dollar bills.

“Found it! In the top drawer all along, imagine that!”

Smirking you plop down in your vanity chair crossing your legs not missing how Choso’s gaze lingered, even if just the tiniest moment, on your thighs.

“Took ya long enough…” 

Choso mumbles. There's no real bite to his words this time though. He’s holding his backpack close to hide his half chub while he removes 3 hefty bags of kush from his backpack to toss on the desk beside you.

Reaching for the cash his annoyance is evident on his face when you jerk away from him. Leaning back and fanning the bills across your chest, you wave them tauntingly in the air.

“Stop playin’ around. Not in the fuckin mood, I swear.”

“Playing?”

You question acting coy.

“This is just business right Choso?”

You sat up as if you were taking this seriously at all and Choso is unamused as he reaches for the money again. 

And you snatch it back yet again like a fucking brat. 

“I’m practically dropping a stack on this–thanks to your new “tax” and all. How do I know if it's any good?”

Clearly your plan is working as you continue to push Choso’s buttons pretending you aren’t excited from him towering over you now.

“Cut the games, Prez. Ya know my shit is always pressure.”

You act contemplative as your eyes lazily travel up his tense muscular form appreciating the view after not seeing him for so long.

“Hmmm, do I though?”

Choso scoffs, growing tired of your games. 

That’s all he ever was to you, a game.

“Like I said, just business. Or are you telling me you weren’t going to count the cash to make sure it's all there before you left?”

Damn. Well you got 'em there. 

Choso rubs the back of his neck before letting out a frustrated sigh.

“Tch—let’s make this quick then, Prez.”

Plug!Choso who after grabbing one of the bags of weed off your vanity takes a seat on your bed. He shrugs off his jacket to retrieve a pipe from the inner pocket and impatiently extends his hand hurrying you with a quick beckoning gesture.

“Gimme your grinder.”

Rolling your eyes you haphazardly toss it over to him. However, unbeknownst to you, the top was loose and crumbles of kush spilled out of it and onto your bed when he failed to catch it.

“Nice looking out Cho, great catch.”

Even though the poor throw and loose top had been your fault, the fact he apparently couldn’t wait to fucking leave along with you still pissed with how he flirted with Brianna makes you lash out. 

“You fucking serious right now? I’m always lookin’ out for your ungrateful ass.”

Obnoxiously you huff, crossing your arms and turning your head away from him.

Ungrateful? For what!? 

He hadn’t been ‘looking out’ for the last month, he’d been completely ignoring you! 

“Heh, like I didn't just stop you from turning that gouda chick into actual cheese from the way you went at her?”

You press your lips together firmly to keep from cracking a smile at his play on Brianna’s nickname. You’re honestly still salty he had even been around her at all getting so chummy. He’d always talked about how stupid your sorority sisters were, it didn’t make sense why he let her flirt with him like that.

You’re also mad he didn’t at least let you pop her one good time.

“The bitches name is Brie. You should know, you were ‘oh so concerned’ about saving her number and giving her a discount.”

Choso looks at you like you’re an idiot as he shakes his head. He stops packing the bowl to throw you his phone.

“Whose number?”

Frowning, you already know the passcode so you unlock it right away. 

Sure enough there was no Brie nor Brianna in his contact lists. Not even her number showed up when you searched his phone for it in case it was under a completely different alias. 

He’d never even saved it. 

The smug smirk on Choso’s face tells you he knew what she was doing all along and got you all riled up on purpose.

In fact, Choso had recognized Brianna’s ploy immediately. You had previously mentioned something about an annoying n’ bitchy rival. 

Besides, there was no other plausible reason for a dumb sorority bitch like her to be talking to him at all—much less throwing herself at him so aggressively.

“Doesn’t feel good now does it, Prez?”

Your face is on fire and you turn away from Choso totally humiliated. You had played right into his hands.

“Hmph! Don’t get cocky, I wanted a reason to beat her ass anyway.”

You puff your cheeks into a pout that Choso can’t help but to chuckle at, shaking his head at you again. 

You were a huge brat that's for damn sure.

“Well, it certainly looks like you found one.”

You’re quiet finally as you rake over his words in your mind. 

‘I’ve always been looking out for you.’

Not only did he not save Brianna’s number there’s a high probability he just kept you from being kicked out of the entire sorority and maybe school too. Fighting was a huge no-no and you could have gotten expelled. Apparently jealous with rage you were ready to risk it all at that moment without even thinking of the consequences. 

Fuck.

Choso had in fact still been looking out for you—even when you didn’t deserve it. 

Plug!Choso who accepts your silence is a sign of your defeat and after a few minutes you move from your desk to sit next to him on your bed as he finishes grinding and packing the bowl. 

“Brats get greens this time.”

I’m paying a premium for all this shit, I better get greens. 

But you hold in that thought, not wanting to give him any more lip in the moment as you’re the one left licking your wounds this time.

Like a gentleman Choso holds the bowl for you and lights it as you take a hit. He tries not to notice how well your glossed lips are wrapping around the phallic mouthpiece as searingly thick smoke flows into your lungs. 

Damn, this shit was dank as hell. 

You’re doing your best to hold it in but your lungs are burning as you watch Choso take a hit himself. Not being able to keep in your coughs for a second more you’re left signaling at Choso to ‘wait a sec’ when he holds the pipe out back to you.

Fuck, it was even stronger than what you remembered.

“See Prez? True pressure.”

You shrug at him trying to save face although your eyes are watering, already tinting a bright shade of red.

“Uhh duh, I always cough Choso. I’ll still need a few more hits to know for certain.”

Choso rolls his eyes.

You take another hit—a smaller one this time—before slowly falling back onto your bed.  

Your eyes close as your high settles in and you debate on what to say next without fucking things up even more with your slick ass mouth. 

However your concentration is diminishing quickly as your buzz makes your senses overly aware of Choso’s intense body heat radiating off him, your thighs practically touching. 

The weed swirling together with the alcohol in your system makes you all the more sensitive. Your mind floats away as your gaze is hyper focused on how the lean muscles of Choso’s toned back and broad shoulders ripple under the thin black tee he wears.

God, Choso is so sexy. 

Your legs squeeze together to calm the burning in your core just from the thought. You want nothing more than to drag him down to bed with you and melt into his embrace—but there's an invisible force field around him that you can’t reach. 

You’re almost certain he would recoil from you if you tried now. 

There’s a conversation you needed to have first but you didn’t know how to start it without fucking things up even more. 

The result is an awkward silence that uncomfortably settles in the room as Choso finishes the bowl off himself. 

Never one to smoke too much of his own product he’s only indulging now to temper his mood. 

Choso doesn’t know why he’s still here, all good sense in him telling him to take the money and get the hell out. Yet he knows he’s hoping for something–anything–to show him you’ve changed even though all signs so far tonight have been showing him you haven’t.

You’re still cowering away from any accountability and he is determined not to give you an easy out this time. 

And it’s for that exact reason Choso can’t look over at you right now.

Otherwise he’s sure to see your tiny pink top that had started to roll up exposing the glitter adorned skin of your underboob. Or how your slow exhales cause your soft stomach to dip temptingly showing off the pink crystal belly button ring he gave you. 

The sight of your fishnets brushing against one another out of the corner of his eye alone is enough to know he wouldn’t be able resist grasping onto your supple thighs. God how he would relish the way his fingers would indent into them. He wanted to rip those slutty fishnets right off of you so his head could push your skirt up even further on your hips while he drowned himself in your wet cunt—not even stopping when you would cry from overstimulation.

Plug!Choso, who is thankful his distraction at long last comes in the form of the faded gray blue fabric by your pillow. 

“Yo!..is that my shit?”

Eyes opening wide, you pale upon seeing Choso reach for the crumpled up shirt. Choso unravels the tee to confirm it is in fact his shirt—one of his favorite band tees at that. 

“Oh, is that yours?”

Choso deadpans.

“So you listen to RHCP now?”

“Maybe…” 

You grab it from him and toss it to the side less you break down and confess to him you had slept in it most nights. Not only have you slept in it but you do in fact listen to RHCP now, especially when you workout.

However with this Choso has hit his limit. 

To him you hadn’t changed. 

Could you not even own up to the tiniest of things?

He couldn’t let himself get sucked back into your toxic web, not anymore. The longer he stayed the more likely that was.

“S’all good, Prez. Keep it.”

Choso grabs his jacket.

“Listen, I gotta g–”

“—w-wait!” 

You grab the other end of his jacket. You still find it difficult to find the right words but you had to say something. 

It was now or never.

“W-Wait… ah, at least before you go…l-let me know how Yuji’s game went?”

You meekly ease into the question but see Choso go ridgid at the mention regardless. 

For now he relents and stays seated. Although a few minutes pass before he speaks.

“He won, of course. MVP of the season.”

You smile genuinely at that but Choso isn’t looking at you— too pained by the memories that began to bubble up again like bile in his throat.

“Awe, that's so great! I knew he would! I’m so happy for him.”

Choso grits his teeth as he turns back to you, his anger evident in his entire being as every muscle in him flexes.

“Are you? So that’s how you treat someone you’re happy for? Really?!”

He doesn’t give you the chance to respond.

“Yuji’s a strong kid— much stronger than me. Honestly, I didn’t even think he minded you weren’t there as he was all focus and excitement to play that day—”

You let out a quiet exhale in relief though any consolation you felt was instantly shattered as Choso continued. 

“But when I put him to bed that night. H-He..He’d asked why you weren’t there…He asked if you were gone now like our parents. Yuji wouldn’t believe you’d miss it otherwise.”

Choso struggles to say the last bit and maintain eye contact with you. 

Every moment you gaze into his eyes though was pure torture as you’re racked with even more guilt.

“Choso I–”

“I’m so fuckin’ tired of all your fuckin’ excuses!”

You’re silent. It’s so strange to see him this upset you don’t know what to say.

“I’d ask you if you’d even considered the abandonment issues that kid already carries but you don’t. You don’t fill that fuckin’ superficial lil’ head of yours with anything beyond yourself!”

Finishing what he had to say, Choso gathers up his jacket and backpack, stuffing it full with the stack of cash on the vanity—not even bothering to count it.

Momentarily dumbfounded, you're scrambling from the bed to block his path. 

“C-Come on, Choso! I didn’t want to abandon him or you! I tried to call you and I texted you so much these past few weeks to talk!”

Choso isn’t impressed.

“And not one text actually had the words ‘I’m sorry’ in it. Not that it would have cut it this time.”

You're reduced to silence for the umpteenth time tonight. 

You wreck your brain knowing most of your texts had been focused on baiting him to respond to you but fuck—did you really not even apologize? 

“But I am sorry!”

Choso’s gaze is cold and distant, so foreign in comparison to the warmth you’d taken for granted before.

“Whatever you say, Prez.”

There it is again. You’ve grown to resent the title, the job, everything about it.

“Just stop calling me that, okay?!”

You’re trying hard to fight back the tears that threateningly pool in the corners of your eyes.

“What...Prez? Why, it aint all that they cracked it up to be?”

“N-No… it’s n-not… I actually hate it and I hate being here.”

Your voice is hardly above a whisper as you direct your words towards the ground. You didn't want Choso to see your glassy eyes even if he’d noticed the cracks in your voice. 

Plug!Choso who regards you with skepticism but curiosity nonetheless. So at long last you decided to be honest with both him and yourself aloud for the first time.

But it didn’t mean shit if you wouldn’t do something about it.

“Then quit.”

Choso says to you like it’s the most obvious answer in the world as your head snaps up incredulously.

“H-huh? W-What?!”

“You heard me princess— quit.”

Could you really just quit? 

Truthfully, you had never considered it an option. The expectations put on you by your sorority sisters, your parents and the plans you had made for yourself had all led you to the commitments and responsibilities you had now. 

How could you just let them all down by walking away from it all?  

“Choso— I heard you..b-but I can’t, you don’t understand I–”

“—No, I understand better than you do, princess. You spent so much time with me and Yuji because you hate this sorority bullshit, you can’t stand any of these bitches and now you just agreed to be president of your own goddamn misery!”

Reading you for filth, Choso stares at you expectantly but you avoid his gaze.

Your nails suddenly becoming all the more interesting as you fumble with them.  

“–Ight then.”

Choso doesn’t want to argue with you any longer. 

You’re still full of excuses to his disappointment. If you wanted to be something you weren't that badly, then that was your own prerogative he decided as he brushed past you.

“N-No! P-Please, don’t leave Cho!”

There's clear desperation in your voice. You cling to him, burying your head into the middle of his back as your shaky hands weave their way around his midsection. 

Choso is mid-twist on the doorknob. 

He had all intentions of leaving if you still weren't being honest with yourself about things.

Still does. 

Yet his determination is wavering from your hot tears begin to seep through his shirt and trickle down his spine. The warmth of your body—now flattened against his—causes your pert nipples to poke into his back while your delicate fingers wretchedly grasp onto his taunt abs like a lifeline. 

Like you actually needed him in your life.

Fucking hell, you didn’t play fair at all.

But he couldn’t forgive you just to hurt him again and especially not Yuji.

“Let go.”

“No.”

“I said let go!”

“NO!”

Choso easily pries you off of him, spinning you around as your back slams against the door pinning you in place. His hands encircle your arms and extend out fully so he could put some distance between the two of you. 

He couldn’t think straight when you were all over him. 

Your world is a blur and in your crossfaded state you are left with vertigo at the sudden shift of positions. Both you and Choso are left panting at the intensity of it all.

“You don’t listen to anyone do you?! You just do whatever the fuck you want…”

Choso’s face is red with anger and your eyes—already reddened from your high—take on a deeper shade as you are now openly bawling in front of him.

“Tch, why are you the one crying? This is how you want things, right?!”

You shake your head, unable to communicate beyond your pitiful sobs. 

Choso grows more and more frustrated as the guilt he is feeling battles with his more rational mind prompting him to still be angry with you despite your tears. Back and forth his mind races until it all bubbles over and—

“—You don’t think I know I’m not good enough for you!?”

Your teary eyes widen at the sudden admission. 

Choso even startles himself with his own confession he’d been holding in all this time. 

“But not Yuji...He’s already so much better than me! He’s gonna actually be something one day. He doesn’t deserve to be treated like that.”

Your lip quivers and your pleas are almost unintelligible.

“I-I know…m’s-sorry…m-m’so sorry C-Choso!”

Choso exhales deeply and shoulders slump forward as he releases you, running a hand over his face and back through his raven locks.

You couldn't read his expression but you didn't want him to attempt to leave you again as you close the gap between you, arms encircling him once more.

Choso doesn’t push you away, yet to his credit he doesn't return your embrace either as he’s still torn.

“I-I missed y-you so m-much.”

Cursing the hold you have over him Choso can’t deny he still wants to be with you—but you both were at an impasse.

Nothing good would come from repeating the same cycle again. 

There is no resolution if you still want to keep up a front. 

“P-Please forgive me Cho—I-I love you.”

The sweet proclamation is accentuated by your pillowy lips spreading kisses over his chest while the tips of your fingers slip up his shirt to place feather light scratches at the small of his back. 

Love, eh?

An unexpected revelation dawns on Choso and he is now resolved in what he has to do. 

“Yeah princess, you really love me?” 

Oblivious to the danger edging in his voice, you nod as you continue to coo affectionate words and affirmations into his chest. One of your legs hitches around his as you mold yourself deeper into him thinking he’d finally forgiven you. 

Had he forgiven you though? 

Well, not exactly. 

A devious smirk appears across Choso’s features.

Choso had come to the conclusion that at the end of the day you were simply a terrible people pleaser. 

Your stuck up bratty nature was merely a front of false confidence. 

You tried so hard to become whatever anyone else wanted you to be, you'd lie to yourself and become utterly miserable in your efforts to appease those around you. 

However, Choso knew the version of you he’d gotten when you’d been with him and Yuji had been the real you. 

And he actually did believe you loved him— even if you had just forced yourself to say it in the moment so you could manipulate him into staying.

Sympathetic to your pitiful nature, Choso wouldn’t just abandon you. 

But if you couldn’t do what was best for you, he would make sure you would himself.

⋙ ©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.

⋙ I'm about halfway through P3, its 5.5k already lol. stick with me though cause pt 3 is the nasty brat taming smut we all are waiting for! if i tagged you here i will tag you again for p3 but im still adding new people to tag list so lmk in comments or reblogs if you'd like to be added. trying to focus to finish this but my adhd might distract me into writing a quick gojo fic but if i do i will finish this right after!

⋙tags: (ps ty for all the sweet comments for those who joined my overall writing tag list yall legit had me in tears ilysm!) @nkogneatho @toji-girl-main @RoyaltyAndRoses @aydene @slowlyshycomputer @bontensbabygirl @yoonjinhusbands @anxious-chick @kashxyou @halosdiary @littlemochabunni @ryomens-vixen @buttercupblu @tonycries @lowkeyremi @strawberrygirl0 @crybaby-herbalist @rintcrous @bomboclakkk @anubisisthebomb @alwaysfreakingout @oeanonyme @chrys23 @spltbtch @uranometrias @officialsimpp @crispycatt @purple-obsidian my-jukebox @peachyharts111 @thedorklingqueen @sugurusprettygirl @scarasw1f3 @kgorethz @c1truswh4re @madaqueue

[scarletssienna]

Beggin' for Footnotes

Summary - Some things aren’t meant to last forever. And despite you and Wanda loving each other you’re not sure if it’s going to work out anymore. 4.0k word count

Warnings - Hurt (not much comfort), heavy angst, swearing, mommy Wanda, oral, fingering, face slapping, sub!reader, degradation, praise, begging, dom/sub dynamics, aftercare, hair pulling, mean Wanda, edging, face-sitting, thigh riding

AN - This is my first post on here! I’ve done writings in the past but I thought I’d try a new format and space to post it! :)) I plan on continuing this if I can find the energy lol!

Part 2

18+, minors + men dni

Not every love was supposed to last. No matter how great, how wonderful, sometimes things still end. You knew Wanda like the back of your hand. And she knows you all the same. So when one of her vices came up after one of your worst fights, you could only watch. Wanda stood out on the back porch. Cigarette between her two fingers as she stared off into the darkness. There was this empty sickening in both of your stomachs that this may be the end. At this point, all options and solutions had been exhausted. You knew it was time. You watched out the kitchen window, unable to tear your eyes away as she slowly inhaled before a large cloud of smoke dissipated into the air, the cold temperatures enhancing it. Your fingers squeezed the sponge from the sink as soapy water flooded between your fingers. The dishes had been long forgotten lately as neither of you had had the energy to wash them. This was unusual for Wanda as she liked to keep the house showroom ready at all times. You forcefully ripped your eyes away from her as you began to wash the dishes, trying to make up for anything you could. To fix what you could in this messy situation. 

The house that had once been so loud with laughter and joy now lingered in empty silence. Your playlist of every song you two had loved played softly over the speakers around the house. If it had been several months ago you would have pulled her closely in your arms, dancing around the kitchen despite her laughs and teases about how cheesy it was. Her nose would crinkle as you sang along in Sokovian to one of her favorite songs. You butchered the pronunciation, but you would try, she could tell. She would have given in eventually and threaded her hands in your hair as she rested her forehead against yours. You would have kissed her, kissed her as if she was going to leave the second you let go. In this reality, she very well might.

You watched out the window again for a moment before getting distracted by the dish you were washing. The knife in your hands harshly tore against your flesh and you quickly dropped the knife into the sink, a soft yelp leaving your lips. You backed away quickly as blood began to drip down your hand. It was a quick scramble for the kitchen towel as you tried to stop the bleeding. Wanda had always been there to comfort you when you were injured in the past. You bit the inside of your cheek trying to stop it as tears quickly began to fall on your face. You let off a soft sob as you abandoned the dishes, heading upstairs to your shared bedroom. Hurrying into the bathroom you discarded the bloodied towel onto the sink countertops and washed the wound before messily bandaging it up. You had never been very good at doing it yourself so Wanda had always insisted on caring for you but you didn't think that was very well an option at this point. 

Tears flooded down your face as the events from the night tore your heart into shreds. You were no longer crying due to the injury. It was a different kind of pain. You stumbled over to the bed and threw your pants onto the floor before climbing into your side of the bed. The sheets were quickly pulled up to your chin as your hand covered your mouth in an attempt to muffle the sobs. Quickly, you drifted off into a tired and pained sleep. 

When Wanda returned inside she hadn't expected to see dishes washed especially as she investigated further and saw the drops of blood on the floor and a bloody knife in the sink. Despite the fight, she still cared and loved you. She quickly rushed upstairs in an attempt to find you. When she noticed the door slightly ajar and silence in the room she quietly peaked her head in. She sighed relieved when she saw you asleep in bed, seemingly uninjured from her view. The smell of cigarettes covered her and she wandered quietly off to the bathroom to take a shower, shutting the bathroom door behind her. For everyone but you her walls were high. She hardly let anyone in. and when she did, it felt as if it always ended this way. The feeling of being cursed towards relationships had set in. She washed her hair, going over the fight in her head as she wondered what could have gone differently, how she could save it. If it was even worth it at this point. 

Tensions had been rising over the past couple of weeks. You both had been working too much recently and had hardly had time for one another. It seemed as if every day was the same. Wake up, go to work, sleep, repeat. It had been killing you both. The littlest things set you both off. It would end up in screaming matches and sleeping alone every time. What set you both over the edge this time was not so little. Natasha, your mutual friend, had begun flirting with you. While she respected your relationship, she had always believed you two were not good for each other. So when you fought last week and you ended up at her house she had done nothing but comfort you. You thought nothing of Natashas' intentions but Wanda knew otherwise. This had sent her into a fit of rage when Natasha dropped you off this morning and kissed your cheek goodbye. 

You both fought for hours, arguing about anything that came to mind, but mainly Natasha. Had you understood and been able to read her mind as well, you would have understood her intentions and sided with Wanda, not seeing Natasha anymore. But you couldn't and this frustrated Wanda. When she attempted to control your mind you quickly noticed and this sent you two further down the line of fighting. You hated it when she used her powers on you. When you thought to yourself that you wished you could just forget everything that had happened Wanda broke. She had misunderstood. Thinking you had meant forgetting her. Silence fell over the fight and she went outside to have a cigarette. Her thoughts consumed her as her heart hurt. 

With how often the fights had been recently as well as how busy you've been, you'd not been intimate in weeks. The tension begins to tear you both apart. When she finished her shower she pulled on an old t-shirt and shorts before popping her head out the bathroom door to check if you were still sleeping. When she saw you, she had to determine what to do. Did she sleep with you? Or did she go to the guest room? She decided that you wouldn't want her in bed and quietly tip-toed to the guest room based on what she had misunderstood. That night she cried herself to sleep as well. 

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

When you woke up the next morning you sat up groggily and sighed to yourself as you didn't see Wanda in bed, the memories of the night prior sinking in. Despite your anger you went to see where she had slept for the night, mostly just wanting to make sure she hadn't ended up locked out on the porch freezing to death. You saw her asleep in the guest room, her makeup smudged and muddled from tears, and her shower. You sighed and went back to your room to get ready for the day. It was unusual for you to be up first and you made use of it, quietly leaving for work before she awoke. 

You returned home late that night, having gone to the bar after work with a few co-workers to unwind and relax. All you could think about was Wanda and the ache between your legs grew. You were mad, but maybe you needed that. You quietly entered the house, making a note to lock the door behind you before heading to find Wanda. You weren't extremely intoxicated, but the anger, lack of quality sleep, stress, and tequila were having a bit of an impact. You could tell she had been home for a couple of hours, the discarded takeout garbage by the trash. Suddenly she caught your eye outside on the back porch. Of course, she was smoking again. You thought to yourself before acting on impulse. You went to the door and harshly pulled the sliding door open. She let out a startled gasp that didn't happen often as she always seemed aware of your presence. 

“Get inside.” You said firmly in a tone that had been unusual for you to take on with her. You had always been the more submissive in the relationship. The words shocked you both a little. She obliged anyway, out of more surprise than anything. She put the cigarette out before coming inside. You shut the door behind her, looking into her eyes before quickly pressing her against the door in a bruising kiss. She yelped out of surprise before kissing back, her hands tangling into your hair. She ignored the taste of tequila on your lips as she knew she tasted like cigarettes and couldn't defend herself for that. 

You made quick work of snaking your hand underneath her shirt, groping her chest as your tongues began to fight. She had never seen this level of dominance out of you. While it surprised and intrigued her, she couldn't have it. You both knew you were just trying to get a reaction out of her as it had been entirely too long since you two had done anything together. Her hand tightened with a grip of your hair as she roughly pulled your head back, quickly beginning to kiss and nip at your neck. You let out a moan as she tugged at your hair, stumbling backward slightly as she pushed you off of her. 

“Upstairs. “ She muttered firmly. You could see the darkness in her eyes and did not question it, quickly moving upstairs to your room. The past few weeks your dynamic had been shallow and lacking. You both needed rules in life. You need a guideline to follow, and she needs an outlet of control. When you got upstairs you looked around the room, taking several deep breaths before going to crack a window to get some airflow. Your jaw clenched as you took a few deep breaths trying to focus on relaxing. You closed the curtains forcefully, a little too forcefully perhaps as they, along with the curtain rod came tumbling down. Your heart sank as tears filled your eyes, threatening to fall as you knew Wanda would be mad. As you heard her footsteps approach you quickly tugged off your shirt, tossing it in a pile alongside your discarded pants. You had already dug your grave and it was getting deeper. Thoughts raced through your head about what punishment would come. The more you thought the more your legs pressed together for any kind of release you could gain. Just as you sat down on the bed the door swung open. “What the hell was that?” She asked. Her voice was angry and her accent began to peak through her words as she spoke. Her head quickly turned and noticed the window. “Did you do this?” she asked in almost a patronizing tone. She knew you did it, the guilt on your face was obvious. 

You pulled your bottom lip into your mouth as she spoke, gnawing on it nervously as you considered your options. Slowly, you shook your head, the hesitation clear as tears brimmed your eyes. She walked over to you, one eyebrow raised in a way that she knew made you weak in the knees. She raised her hand before a loud echoing slap hit your cheek. You let out a moan and pressed your legs together harder as tears finally fell.  “Lying gets you nowhere. I'll ask you again, Detka.” she paused, faining tenderness as she wiped a tear away from your face. “Did you do this?” every word she spoke was drawn out and stern as she raised her eyebrow and held your chin in place, forcing you to look into her eyes. Slowly you began to nod, bracing yourself for the slap you knew was about to come. When she raised her hand a slap did not come. Instead, she giggled at your flinch and reached down, snapping your bra snap on your shoulder. “This is what happens when little girls try to do things that are too big for them,” she spoke slowly, making sure each word sunk in. “You didn't even have time to fully undress for Mommy.” she shook her head and snapped your bra strap once again before pushing you to lay back on the bed. She climbed on top of you, straddling one of your thighs as she ground her hips, working herself up. 

“Please Mommy,” you whined out softly as your hips raised into her, begging for any amount of pleasure you could get. Another slap fell hard across your cheek and you felt your thoughts slowly drift further into a fuzzy headspace. You moaned at the feeling. Her hand was wet from the tears that had fallen down your face and she made it a point to wipe her hand on your bare stomach. 

“I didn’t permit you to speak. Did I?” She asked firmly as she leaned down, kissing and nipping at your neck. You shook your head frantically as you struggled to keep your hands by your sides.  She slid her hands back up your stomach and muttered under her breath. “Good girl.” Before pulling your bra down to reveal your breasts. She wasted no time as she quickly kissed down towards your chest, taking the small bud into her mouth. Her tongue swirled around your nipple as her hand snaked down into your panties, finally touching you where you needed it most. She gasped dramatically and pulled her head up, locking eyes with you when she felt your wetness. Your face turned a deep shade of red as she proceeded to tease and taunt you for how wet you had been at her from only just slapping and teasing you. All of your thoughts were consumed by her in a fuzzy bliss. 

Without warning she slipped two fingers inside of you easily. Her fingers made quick work of pumping in and out, stretching and curling them just where you needed it most. You moaned loudly and wrapped your arms around her back, pulling her body closer to you as you hid your face in her shoulder, biting down softly on the tender flesh. This depicted a soft moan from Wanda as her hips jerked slowly against your thigh. She pulled her body back with a grin as she began to bite softly across your jaw. 

“Let me see your pretty face baby. I want to see you while I fuck you.” She said her fingers worked faster, her thumb reaching up to touch your throbbing clit. You blushed red as you looked into her eyes. The moon was shining through the window casting a moonlit glow across her face, a smirk forming across it. Just as quickly as she worked you up to an orgasm, she stopped. She pulled her hand away quickly and you found yourself frantically reaching for her wrist as your hips jerked underneath her.

“No! Mommy!” You yelled out exasperated as tears fell quickly from your eyes at the loss of sensation. She smirked down at you, her tongue slowly licking her lips. 

“You didn't think I'd let you cum that quickly after what a brat you've been the past few weeks little girl?” She asked in a patronizing manner as she pulled her hand out of your panties and brought her fingers to her lips. You moaned at the sight, her tongue licking her fingers clean, making a show of the process. Her fingers then slid into your mouth and you groaned at the taste of your arousal mixed with her. Your tongue swirled around her fingers as you proceeded to suck her fingers. 

“Please Mommy.” was all you could seem to muster out after she pulled her fingers out of your mouth. Your mind was clouded and fogged and just where Wanda wanted it. 

“Silly me,” she smiled as she looked down. “Mommy has been giving you all the pleasure, she completely forgot to undress.” she motioned towards her clothes before standing up. You groaned and reached for her when she stood, no longer touching you. You let out a soft murmur as your hands grabbed at her shirt, pressing your legs together. She stripped before walking back towards you. She tugged your panties down your legs and tossed them towards the pile of clothes before doing the same with your bra. You couldn't help but notice the wetness that had soaked Wanda's panties and now glistened her thighs. Your mouth watered at the sight as all you wanted to do was taste her. 

You knew how often you had fought lately and how the arguments left you due for punishment. You just weren't exactly sure what form it would take. Anticipation flooded through your body as you looked up into her eyes, your eyes wide and innocent. 

“You're going to eat me out until I cum, maybe then I'll give you what you want,” she stated firmly as she squeezed at your hips. Her touches were not gentle. Her fingers dug into your tender flesh, all of her anger, stress, and tension coming out onto you. You moaned at the touch, more sensitive and aware with each touch and mark she left across your body. She let go with a slap to your thigh and you groaned at the loss of her. You sat up and watched as she moved around the room, sitting on the bed in the middle, spreading her legs for you as she watched with dark eyes. “Come make Mommy feel good.” Her voice dripped with arousal as her words of encouragement enticed you further, not that it took much at this point though.

Quickly you moved and settled yourself between her legs. You slowly began kissing up her thighs, licking the path of arousal she had left for you. She grumbled impatiently above you, clearly already ready for attention where she needed it. Her hand snaked through your hair, gently at first as it stroked your scalp. She then grabbed a fistful, tugging your hair harshly as she forced you up higher, pushing your head between her legs. At the tug, you let out a loud moan as you cursed under your breath. You got the hint and stuck out your tongue quickly getting work between her legs. Your tongue licked up her slit before it brought fast attention to her clit. You brought your fingers up and slipped two fingers inside of her. You were kinder than Wanda had been to you, moving your fingers less harshly and aggressively. It worked nonetheless as she quickly rose to an orgasm with the combination of both your fingers and tongue. Her grip on your hair did not loosen as her hips began to jerk against your face. As she reached her peak she let out a loud moan, her hips moving frantically as she tugged harshly at your hair. The taste that hit your tongue made you moan as you quickly lapped up as much as she would allow before pulling your head away. 

Her chest rose and fell heavily as she caught her breath, a gentler hand moving to your neck. You leaned up her body as you kissed her passionately. When her tongue slid across your bottom lip and your mouth you eagerly allowed it entrance. A smile grew across her face as she pulled away. You whined at the loss but it was quickly relieved when she pressed a singular finger to your lips. 

“Mommy.” You moaned out as your hips began to grind against her stomach. Her hand snaked down her stomach to touch you, her fingers ghosting over your clit. 

“Come sit on my face Detka.” She said firmly as she adjusted her positioning, letting your thighs rest next to her head. You were hesitant yet eager as you slowly lowered yourself down, moaning loudly as her tongue finally made contact. Your hips jerked against her face as you ground against her tongue. You were worked up quickly, faster than ever as she seemed to know exactly where you needed it. She mumbled out from underneath you as she worked you up towards an orgasm. “Beg for it, Malyshka.”

Quickly words began to tumble out of your mouth as desperation to cum was needed. “Please, Mommy. Please!” You practically yelled as your hips jerked more, her nails digging into your thighs. “Please let me cum.” You begged. She complied with a grin.

“Cum for Mommy, Detka.” She said as her tongue moved rapidly beneath you. Instantly you reached your peak, reaching for the bead frame in front of you to steady yourself as you moaned loudly. When Wanda felt you had settled enough she gently pulled you down next to her and into her arms. You shook a little in Wanda's arms as she held you for the first time in weeks. Her fingers tangled in your hair as she slowly combed through the mess she had made, taking time to massage your scalp. All the thoughts of your fights had completely melted away and you were consumed by her and her embrace. 

“Mommy.” You murmured as tears began to fall on your cheeks again, your face nuzzling closely in the crook of her neck.

“You did so good baby, so good.” She praised quietly as she kissed behind your ear. Her fingertips found a gentle pattern of scratching up and down your back with one hand while the other massaged where she pulled your hair. Praise was whispered into your ear as she held you closely, not wanting to let go. Never wanting to let go. Slowly your sobs calmed and you settled into her embrace, slowly lifting your head to leave soft kisses across her jaw and neck. 

“I love you, Wanda.” The words left your mouth for the first time in weeks and a soft smile crept across your lips. Wandas' face glimmered with love as she pulled you into a kiss. 

“I love you too, Detka.” She whispered through kisses as she could only hold you closer. After a while of the silent embraces Wanda's thoughts of the fights crept back into memory. “We’re going to be okay.” She hesitated and looked towards you. “Right?” She spoke softly, her voice filled with fear at the thought of losing you. You nodded and kissed her softly, your mind foggy and cloudy as all you wanted was to be close to her. That night you slept close, tangled up in each other's love, neither wanting to pull away.

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

The next morning when you woke up snuggled up in Wanda's arms felt different. The bliss that usually followed had dissipated and all you could think about was the pain of being with her. You gained a sinking pit in your stomach as guilt and fear coursed through your body. The flight response kicked in. You couldn't be with her, not now. Tears began to fall as you quickly but carefully left the bed and Wanda's embrace. Hurriedly you moved for some clothes as you threw on the closest things you could find without waking her. You reached for the door handle but paused. One glance back to Wanda confirmed it. You couldn't be here. So where did you go? Who greeted you with open arms? Natasha.

[obsessedwrhys]

I was wondering if I could request a Leo or/and Donnie x reader. (I don’t know if you do multiple- if you don’t- super sorry! Just do whichever one you feel in the mood to do) where if someone runs a finger through their hair or scratches for scalp they just melt? Like full on limp- very easy to make reader stop overworking themselves, cuddle with them, just get them to sleep, ya know! Hope that makes sense lol!

DISASTER TWINS X TOUCHSTARVED!READER

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ fluff, no angst, reader is gn!! (I didn't know what to name this headcanon 🤷🏻‍♀️)

LEO

You just know being with this man means being constantly showered with affection.

That's why you two are easily the perfect pair.

Everytime you find yourself stressed from your work, he could feel his senses kicking in from a mile away. Before you know it, he's already by your side to provide emotional support.

"Alright alright!! Time to take a break!! Chop chop!!" He'd shoo you out of the chair and drag you to his bed.

He knows how hard your work is, at least he does from the things April has told him. That's why he goes over the top when helping you unwind.

Back massages, feet rubs, and your favourite, head massages. Dude would definitely purchase body oil for you. The way he so delicately runs his hands through your hair while also making sure he applies just enough force for it to be soothing. You couldn't help but hum happily.

Those noises being signs that he's doing things just right!!

Apart from that, if you were to finish your work, he would definitely reward you by buying all your favourite snacks while also cuddling together to watch a show you've been meaning to start.

But if you're too tired. He'd just play your comfort songs as you guys just cuddle to sleep.

He has a ton of playlists that contains your favourite songs.

You could ask him about that one song you don't remember the name to and he'll instantly know which one you were talking about.

He likes to brag about having such a hard working partner to his brothers.

Like pleaseeee you wish you could get lucky like me 🤭

Of course he's not fine with you overworking yourself. That's a huge no no for him.

If you were to object his idea of taking a break, this man will straight up kneel down and rest his head on your lap like a dog desperate for your attention. He wouldn't stop sighing or making sad noises until you've given in.

He knows you like physical touch so if you ever liked, he wouldn't mind keeping you company as you worked, which most of the time resulted in him falling asleep on the table.

He just wants to be apart of it okay!!! You like to tell him he's doing a good job even though he doesn't do much but play with the pencil by trying to balance it on his nose.

100% cutie patootie

DONNIE

Now this man don't play around.

If you tell him you need to get the work done on time then this man will help you make sure it's done on time.

He's extremely helpful, he watches as you work but he won't intervene unless you request for his assistance. That's because he wants you to grow and solve things by yourself.

However if he were to see you start to burn out from frustration, he'd suggest you guys to take a break which he likes to call "Coffee break"

Do not ever say no to coffee break because this man will talk you to tears by justifying about a topic you strongly disagree on.

He'd brew you both a cup of coffee, but if you happen not to be into caffeine then tea will do.

Since he's aware of how you seem to shut off your mind from physical touch, he would cuddle with you as he just scratches your scalp. The way your eyes flutter close makes him smile to himself.

As someone who also struggles with burn outs, he would hate for the same to happen to you. Yeah sure he doesn't take care of himself that well but that doesn't mean he'll let that happen to you!!!

If you are ever too exhausted, he'd offer to wash your hair for you. You know like those things they have at the saloon where you lay down and put your hair in the open sink thingy (im lazy to find the name)? Yeah he'd definitely make one in his lab just for your personal use.

He would 1000% watch tutorials online to give you that sensational experience.

Everytime you guys cuddle to sleep, you would still be a little awake to feel his hands tracing the features on your face. This habit of his pretty much became a routine that you have a harder time of sleeping if he isn't caressing your face.

He likes to reward you with kisses on the forehead everytime you get your work done. But that's not all, he'd always invent something new just for you. He may or may not have caught a sneak peek of your wishlist, and since some of the things you've wished for can be easily made by him. Why not save that money and let him do his magic?

He surprises you each time with the gifts and you are grateful every time.

Cuddles during movie night is a must!! I don’t know why but I just have a feeling this man probably has like a small cinema hidden in his lab.

You guys would always watch any TV series together, like one will not continue on to the next episode without the other there to watch it with them.

His cuddles are the best when you guys are watching romance movies. Especially during a romantic scene. His body would scoot closer to yours without him even realising. His arms around your body tightening slightly as he nuzzles his face a bit onto your skin.

100% supportive bf

[hwaflms]

𐙚˙⋆.˚ nct 127 as 1d songs!

‧₊˚ 💭 ✩彡 , , 0.69k, fluff + slight suggestive + slight angst, just lil snippets of you and 127 with one direction songs, not my usual writing style, TELL ME UR FAV 1D TRACKS

♡ taeil . . . last first kiss

rainy days, soft smiles and soft kisses, nicknames, casual dates, putting away groceries, taking photos of things to show each other later, promises, painting dates, secret handshakes, prolonged stares, drawing each other, approving photos to post, kisses on the top of your head, karaoke nights, trying street food together, song recommendations, deep questions, laughing over some soju, denial and hesitation, splashing each other with wet hands

♡ taeyong . . . little things

LONG showers, buying clothes for you, matching jewellery, folders in your galleries for each other, perfume, long talks over tea, words of affirmation, flowers, crying in front of each other, wine nights, slow dancing, sending you reminders to eat, falling asleep over call, learning ukulele together, staying-in days, holding hands 99.99999% of the time, corny jokes, bike rides, playing video games, cutting fruit for each other, naps while it's raining outside

♡ johnny . . . she's not afraid

secret movie dates, drive-thru mcdonald’s, tight dresses, tousled hair, long video calls, subtle lock screens, orange-scented soap, sneaking out at night, drunken confessions, the two of you together in the background of every photo, watching scary shows, kissing in the dark, running, texting while in the same room, lying in his arms, windy nights, knowing each others favourite songs, screenshots, hushed whispers, road trips, dancing in the kitchen

♡ yuta . . . perfect

parties at 1 am, hailing taxis, long sloppy kisses, tucking hair behind each others ears, red bull cans, blasting music in the car, ice cream runs, eye contact, skinny dipping, cheap hotels, playing pool, texting late at night, beach walks, wind blowing in your face, meeting in secret, italian restaurants, thin cigarettes, messy sheets and hair, windows all the way down, knowing smiles, wearing his shirt at home, soft gasps, motel pools, cherry lip balm, getting tattoos together, getting kicked out of parties

♡ doyoung . . . half a heart

soft sweaters, missed calls, buying his detergent, matching rings, soft wispy clouds, two different kinds of juices in your fridge, puddles, picnic dates, mixed up socks, never deleting photos, the first text after an argument, books with notes in them, walks by the river, watching a show together, conversations in the dark, spontaneous coffee meet-ups, naming plants, museum visits, drives in the rain, saving memes about each other, empty lockets

♡ jaehyun . . . no control

stargazing, drinking on rooftops, meeting at parties, red cups, pool nights, lipstick stains, the smell of his perfume, oversized clothing, driving fast when the roads are empty, voice messages, morning kisses, private playlists, tinted taxis, looking for each other in a room, holding your hair back, strong coffee, silk pillowcases, clothes on the floor, selfies on each others phones, muffled moans, drunk tattoos, pinching his cheeks

♡ jungwoo . . . 18

amusement park dates, walks at night, letters on beige paper, photo booth pictures, ugly keychains, playing on the seesaw when the playgrounds empty, passing notes, keeping said notes, bracelets, having each other as your lock screen, messy beds, lists of baby names, knowing each other's favourite songs, extra toothbrushes, shampoo bottles, yearbook cutouts, shoebox filled with letters and trinkets, holding pinkies, random texts throughout the day, talking to his mom on the phone, long calls

♡ mark . . . i want to write you a song

pure innocent love, cafe dates, warm hugs, board games and hot chocolate, writing songs for you, sharing clothes, pecks while smiling, cookie recipes, said cookies ending up burnt, karaoke nights, acoustic guitars, writing desks, cheek kisses, grocery shopping, badly taken polaroids, long walks, late night conversations, photo albums, beanies when it's cold, holding hands under the table, wearing his glasses, breakfast in bed, bouquets, scarfs, walks along the sand

♡ haechan . . . temporary fix

stolen glances, smokey rooms, making out in the back of a taxi, moonlight, hair flying in the wind, playing footsie under the table, jealousy, talking on the phone late at night, eyes meeting across the room, drunken kisses, sitting on his lap, lots of 'are you awake?' texts, vodka sours, mirrored lense sunglasses, dyeing each other's hair, locking doors, lips on your neck, avoiding questions, stupid contact names, waking up in his clothes, empty wine bottles, bright sunsets, 10+ tiktoks and memes every morning, voice notes of him singing

[neonghostlights]

I seriously love all the fics u write especially wasted years. I had this idea of rockstar eddie finally getting tired of hooking up with groupies and random celebrities and wanting to settle down with Reader. Hes really sweet and in love with her but everytime they go out one of his hook ups confronts him again or hes constantly getting dms or texts from previous situationships and shes just so over it and feels she cant compare to celebrities or beautiful groupies and he feels terrible cuz he really wants to be with reader. Happy ending as always. 🖤

Hiii! Thank you so much❤️ you have no clue how much that means to me. I wanted to keep this a little different from Wasted Years so I made it modern!rockstar!Eddie Munson x Teacher!Reader (a series I wanted to write but never got around to. who knows, maybe I'll write it some day)

Warnings: jealousy, poor self image, insecurity, break ups, crying, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort 18+ only

Wordcount: 2.7k

Show Off

The tabloids never cared about you. You could be a fly buzzing by Eddie’s pretty curly hair for all they cared. 

In the past year and a half that you two had been together, you had been ignored, cropped out of pictures and shoved to the side by paparazzi and touchy fans alike. 

You usually didn’t mind being on the sidelines. He was famous before he met you and he would be famous after you. You signed up for this. 

It was fate, the way you and Eddie met. Or maybe it was just a coincidence; just the way life went. But you liked to think it was fate. 

You had found yourself dragged to a music event by a coworker that you had just met. You were new to the school as a middle school teacher and joining a tight knit group of coworkers was scary. You had no idea that Robin,  the music teacher at your school, knew one of the bands playing and was actually friends with them.  

You didn’t know what to expect when she had dragged you backstage to say hi to her friend.  You had heard the name Eddie Munson before, had seen the photos of him on social media, but past that you weren’t much of a fan. Although, you had to admit you did discover that you had a few Corroded Coffin songs in your playlist once you did some digging. When Eddie found that out he thought it was hilarious. 

Sparks flew when he shook your hand. At first, you thought that it was something that only you had felt. You were ready to brush it off as being star struck. But when he had asked for your number before you left, you knew he felt it too. 

The rest was history. A year and a half later you were happily in a relationship with a rockstar. At first, you thought it was a joke. Why would a hot rockstar want to date a middle school teacher from a small town? But Eddie proved to you over and over again that he was serious about you and him. 

When people close to you found out that you and Eddie were dating, they thought you were lying and tried to laugh it off. Then, when they realized you were telling the truth they pitied you. You were fed rumor after rumor of what they had heard Eddie Munson gets up to in his free time from the partying to the groupies. 

You would be lying if you said it didn’t bother you to hear that the man you loved was so desired by the world. There was a stark contrast between the rumors and the man you grew to love though. 

Eddie would fly you out to see him in LA often. He had begged you to move out there with him full time. You wanted to, but you at least wanted to finish off the school year. You didn’t want to have to put the kids through the trials of a new teacher. 

It was currently spring break and you were on a two week trip to LA to visit Eddie. You had arrived earlier that day and were currently sitting at a restaurant together. It was one of those fancy ones, with the thick white table cloths and the waiters in suits and ties. The spot was popular for LA stars to frequent. 

Eddie had insisted you looked so beautiful that he needed to take a picture of you as soon as you got to the table. You knew how this worked, he would take the picture and set it as his new background on his phone until he got a new picture of you that he swore was the best of all time. Pictures of you never ended up on his social media. He wanted to keep your relationship private, which you understood. But sometimes you wanted to be bragged about. You wanted the world to know that Eddie was spoken for. But it was his choice. 

“How was your week?” Eddie asked as you were waiting for your food to arrive. 

You sighed, not wanting to complain but this school year was eating you alive. Middle schoolers were a tough group to control sometimes and more often than not you were coming home with a massive migraine and an existential crisis. 

“It’s okay, I guess. Testing is coming up and I feel like the principal is practically breathing down my neck. I’m so ready for summer break,” you admitted with a small smile. Summer break meant staying up here with Eddie full time. Something that you were both terrified and excited for. 

Eddie nodded in understanding. He knew how much your job stressed you out. “It’ll get better soon. Just think, this summer me and you are going to be so relaxed. We can lay out by the pool everyday and go to the beach. I’ll even get you a shelf for all of your books. Hell, I’ll get you a whole room for all of your books.”

You let out a quick snort of a laugh. “Are you offering to build me a library to try to coerce me into moving in with you?” 

“Is it working?” He asked with a smirk as he leaned back in his chair, one arm laid against the table. 

You reached to take his hand in yours, to tell him that he didn’t have to flash his money or offer to buy you things to have your affection but when you reached your hand for him another hand had appeared, and it was currently rubbing your boyfriends arm. 

You recognized her from instagram. She was a model and had been rumored to be with Eddie in some capacity before you and him had gotten together. You never asked him about it, not wanting to know about his previous hookups. Your heart wouldn’t be able to handle it. 

You and Eddie made quick eye contact before turning and facing one of the most beautiful women you had ever seen in your life. Eddie looked up at the woman, probably just thinking it was a fan with poor boundaries. His face turned to panic when he realized what was happening. 

Eddie moved his arm from her grasp quickly, shooting an apologetic look to you. 

“Eddie,” she cooed. Even her voice was pretty. “So happy to see you here.”

Eddie cleared his throat. This was fucking awkward. “Nice to see you too, Claire,” he said politely. He held eye contact with you like he was telepathically trying to send you a message. 

She seemed to have expected a bigger reaction from him based on the way she frowned slightly before smoothing her features. She followed his line of sight to you and you couldn’t help but squirm a little under her stare. 

“Aw, you’re taking your assistant out for dinner? That’s so sweet,” she said, manicured fingers tapping against the table cloth. 

Eddie’s politeness leached away at her words. The dinner plates arrived at the table and the waiter seemed to be as enthralled by her beauty as everyone else was. It felt like the whole restaurant was staring in your direction. 

You looked down at what you were wearing. Eddie had bought you this dress as a surprise and you thought it was so pretty. You had followed a makeup tutorial to the best of your ability when you were getting ready earlier. You didn’t end up looking quite like the woman in the video but you thought you had done a decent enough job. Your hair hadn’t been done professionally lately so it was a little dull. You had just been too busy with work to keep up with your appearance. Eddie never seemed to mind how you looked so it wasn’t a priority. Maybe you were mistaken. 

“Nice to see you but I want to eat my dinner now,” Eddie said coolly. His tone was calm but his face wasn’t. 

Claire scrunched her face up at this, like she couldn’t understand why he wasn’t taking the bait. “Well, I’m sure I’ll be seeing you soon,” she said before scurrying away at his dark look. 

Eddie let out a deep breath that he had been holding in. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t think anyone would interrupt us.”

“It’s okay,” you said with a wave of your hand. “I just wanna eat before it gets cold.”

Eddie agreed, but his eyes lingered on your face for a bit. If he noticed how you were feeling he didn’t say anything. 

It didn’t hit you until after the bill was paid and you were leaving the restaurant that he never corrected Claire when she called you his assistant. 

The next day you woke up to Eddie peppering your face with kisses. You stretched, feeling the release of your joints popping. 

“That was a good one,” Eddie commented after a particularly loud pop of your back. 

“What time is it?” You yawned. 

“Early. I got a call to head down to the studio for a bit this morning. There seems to be some sort of crisis they need my input on. I promise it’ll probably be about an hour. I’ll bring some coffee from that place you like back.Will you be okay if you’re alone here for a bit?” He asked while rubbing your lower back. 

You shot him a shy smile. “Can I have a muffin too?” 

Eddie laughed. “Of course.” 

Eddie got ready and was out the door before you knew it with promises to bring you back all the muffins in the world. 

You climbed out of bed, too awake to go back to sleep and went to the living room. You melted into Eddie’s soft couch with a blanket and book. You were content until your phone started to ding. 

Robin: You’re with Eddie in LA right?

You: Yes. Miss me already?

Robin: Okay. I saw something this morning that was weird and wanted to check with you. 

You: Weird? What was it?

Robin: Google Eddie. 

You immediately swiped open your browser and typed in Eddie’s name. The first result was his wikipedia page, and then underneath were a row of gossip sites with updates from early that morning. You clicked the first one to be greeted by a picture of Eddie and Claire at the restaurant the night before. 

Her hand was on his arm and she was smiling down at him with a salacious look. Eddie had just turned his head with a polite smile on his face. You remembered when this happened, it was just before he realized who was touching him. 

Someone must have snuck a picture right when she got to the table. It had been taken at the perfect angle so you weren’t seen in the picture at all, not even the back of your head. 

‘Love is in the air for these two. Model and Rockstar spotted on romantic date.’ 

The words burned your eyeballs as you read them. Was it really so unbelievable that you and Eddie were together that they completely dismissed the possibility that he was on a date with you instead. 

You knew it was a mistake but you had to check and see what was being said on social media. You immediately went to Eddie’s page and clicked on his most recent photo. Underneath was thousands of comments, but the one to stick out the most to you was from this morning. Claire had commented a row of fire emojis right around the time the gossip sites started posting the photo, adding fuel to the rumor. 

How stupid of you to think that you could compete in Eddie’s world? There were beautiful women practically fighting to get near him and here you sat in your pajamas on his couch looking like a wreck. Even when you did try it obviously wasn’t good enough for Eddie or the world. 

You jumped off the couch, your socks skidding across the floor. 

You needed to get out of here. You couldn’t breathe in this house anymore surrounded by Eddie’s things. You wondered what the people back home thought, the few that knew you and Eddie were together. Were they laughing at your pathetic attempt at happiness? Did they know the whole time that this was going to fail? 

You ripped your suitcase out of the closet. You hadn’t even had the chance to unpack anything yet. Eddie had put it in the closet as soon as you got there, joking that if he hid it from you then you wouldn't ever be able to go home. 

You pushed the thought out of your head as you grabbed a few toiletries that you had brought and through them in your bag. The sound of the front door opening and closing had you freezing. 

“Babe?” Eddie called through the house. “I hope you can eat four muffins because they had a lot of different new ones to try- What are you doing?” He finally asked when he reached the bedroom. He held a paper bag in one hand and a tray of iced coffees in the other. He set them down on top of his dresser. 

You turned away from him, not able to look him in the eye as you did this. “I’m going home, Eddie.”

“What? Why?”

“I just, uh, I don’t think this is working out. I’m sorry,” you cried, wiping your tears as quickly as they came. 

“Is this because I left this morning? I told them not to bother me anymore. I’m sorry, baby,” he said as he wrapped an arm around you. You cried even harder. You were breaking up with him and he was still just trying to comfort you. 

“Why am I a secret?” You asked into his shirt. 

“What?” He pulled you away from him so he could look at your teary face. “You are not a secret.”

“No one knows about me. Everyone thinks you’re with a model even though I was right there. Even she thought I was your assistant and you didn’t even correct her. You don’t ever post me. It’s like you want people to think you’re single,” you accused. 

Eddie’s face fell. “That’s not true. We go places together in public. You know I don’t post you because I don’t want people in our relationship. You’re the most important thing to me and I don’t want it to be ruined by all the bullshit.” He waved his hand in the air as he spoke. 

“I’m not good enough,” you told him, grabbing onto your suitcase again. 

“That’s a lie. You are good enough. You’re the only good thing I have, baby. Please.” Eddie was crying now too. It ripped your heart out to see. 

You let go of your suitcase, rushing towards him and wrapping your arms around him. You squeezed him tight like you were hoping that would help put his tears back in place. You felt awful now that you had made him cry. You had expected him to not care if you left. You thought that it would be freeing for him to be without you. 

“Please don’t cry,” your voice came out muffled against him. “This is my fault.”

“This is not your fault,” he told you. “It’s mine. I was so worried about protecting you that I didn’t take into account how it felt for you.” 

“It’s just, it’s not a secret that you were with a lot of beautiful women before me. It hurts to think that they think they can still get with you.”

“Baby, I know I have a past but they don’t compare to you. You are all I have wanted for the past year and a half and you’re all I’m gonna want for the rest of my life,” he admitted. 

“The rest of your life?” 

“Why do you think I’m trying to get you to move in here so bad?”

You sighed, wiping your tears against his shirt. “I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I love you,” he said as he tilted your face up to meet his. 

“I love you too,” you sighed as your lips met his. 

Later that night, the internet went crazy when a photo of Eddie’s beautiful girlfriend was posted on social media, introducing you to the world as the one that stole his heart. 

[fbfh]

rodrick x hyperfeminine hcs pt 3: changes: the big prom: the sex romp: the season finale

wc: 2.2k

genre: angst and fluff, teenage dream

pairing: rodrick x hyperfeminine!reader

warnings: roddy has low self esteem, madison and heather are not good friends prom trope, happy ending

summary: you and rodrick are both planning on ditching prom because if you can't go with each other, you don't want to go at all. fate has other plans, and rodrick thinks maybe prom isn't that overrated after all.

song recs: teenage dirtbag - wheatus, wasting love - iron maiden

a/n: LAST PART IN THE RODDY X HYPERFEM ARC!!! send me roddy asks bc this boy deserves more love. also if you get the clone high reference in the title I love you

(optionally) the iconic dress

tags @dustyinkpages @the-snake-pit @inthehoneymoonwithconnorrk800 @followingthefanfiction @2220825 @marveldemigod17 @celootaku1 @stay-to-reblog @whos-mixxie @mikulovingtrash @inthemindofaweirdo @b0nes-phobic @myymmeloo @wanderlustingcastaway @debbi3-debaser @lubunnii @imaybewrongbutidoubtit @cloverhasnobrain @bessonasa @strangelysamantha @1-800-starkindustrie @brookeskitty @1ummcalhoody6 @always1s4youbitch-blog @citri-koi @vincentluvr444 @brunnetteiwik @melllinaa @reeces-pieses @mentamaree @jasontodd-artemisgrace4life @jinniy

You’ve spent the last few weeks throwing yourself into the project of planning Heather and Madison’s prom outfits 

And hair

And makeup

And accessories

But that all comes with the territory of getting ready for prom

Once you decided to put them in soft pastels and flowy floaty ball gown dresses, word got out pretty quickly that that was the look for prom season in plainview

Everyone was getting the poofiest, softest dresses they could get their hands on

Soon selkie dresses and all their knock offs were sold out everywhere

Even white and pastel suits and tuxedos were selling like hotcakes 

Heather and Madison keep asking about your dress, but you don’t have the heart to tell them you don’t have one yet

Because you don’t plan on going

If you can’t go with Rodrick you don’t want to go at all

You don’t want Heather and Madison to be disappointed, so you haven’t told them that your real plans for prom night are to stay at home in your cozy pink pajamas and watch romantic comedies while you throw chocolates at the screen like a heartbroken Elle Woods

Rodrick has similar plans to blow off prom night

With less romcoms and pedicures, but he still has no intention of going

He managed to score Iron Maiden tickets for the friday after prom for him and the guys

Even though Ward is probably going to flake on them so he can spend the weekend with his girlfriend

Her parents are out of town then, so none of them can blame him

Rodrick’s been going out of his way to throw out every flier and leaflet about prom that gets sent to their house before his mom can see it

And it’s been going fine 

Until Greg decides to be a little asshole and get revenge for a harmless prank Rodrick pulled on him

Sure, Greg’s skin was stained blue for the rest of the week

But still

That doesn’t warrant showing their mom all the prom flyers and convincing her that Rodrick can’t possibly miss out on this developmental milestone 

Rodrick was desperate not to go

And he almost got away with it

But before he knows it, it’s prom night and his mom barges into his room with the flier insisting he goes

Rodrick tries everything he can think of to change her mind

“Mom, I don’t have anything to wear.”

She digs through his closet and holds up the only clean shirt and tie in his closet, giving him a look in response

“I don’t have a ride.”

“You can take your van.”

“I don’t have a date!”

That one gets him a 10 minute lecture about building character and planning ahead

“And I’m sure if you ask nicely there will be some girl who will dance with you. To real music, not that… screaming and thrashing and noise you’re always playing.” Susan says, pausing the spotify playlist he’d been blasting

Rodrick rolls his eyes at how out of touch she is

Everyone at school thinks he’s some loser punk

And now he’s going to show up late to prom with no date??

He’s glad prom is only for seniors, because he would never be able to live this down otherwise

Maybe it won’t be too bad

He can just sit in the parking lot and blast Green Day until it’s time to leave

“And don’t you think you can just go somewhere else, or hide in your van. You know my friend Linda?”

Susan doesn’t wait for Rodrick to answer

“Well, she’s a chaperone, and she’ll tell me if you’re not there. Okay? This is for your own good, Rodrick.” 

Fuck

Well, that idea’s out

“Fine, I’ll go…” Rodrick agrees, reluctantly giving in

Susan is delighted

She starts to leave so he can get changed, but he stops her before she can

“Can I borrow your eyeliner?”

A little while later, he’s sitting in his van in the school parking lot

He was already wearing black converse and ripped black jeans, so he just had to throw on the black button up and red tie his mom found

His hair was perfectly messed up from the nap he was startled awake from when his mom barged in

He shoves his headphones in his pocket, and after putting it off for as long as he can, he gets out and closes the door

Maybe it won’t be so bad

Maybe there will be some live music that’s actually decent

Ward and his girlfriend are already there, so maybe they’ll take pity on him and let him third wheel for a while so he doesn’t feel like such a total loser

He opens the doors to the gym, and is met with a hellscape of fluffy pastels and cutesy radio pop

Even the guys are in white and soft shades of blue and green and yellow

He feels like he’s going to throw up

He's in hell

This is what hell looks like

Among the hellscape of fluffy pastel tulle, Heather and Madison text you in a fit, wondering where the hell you are

You’re missing prom for god’s sake

You text them back the same thing you’ve been telling them all night

You’re running late, you’re having wardrobe malfunctions, but have fun and you’ll be there soon

When their dates leave to get them drinks, Madison sees someone sulking at a table

It’s Rodrick Heffley

She subtly takes a picture of him from across the room and texts Madison

🚨HEFFLEY ALERT🚨

He looks fucking pathetic lmao

Like how sad can u get lskjsldkfjd

Heather responds, laughing at what a loser he is

Only Madison didn’t just text Heather

She texted the group chat with Heather, her, and you

Your phone starts blowing up with more texts from Heather and Madison

You finally check their texts, assuming it’ll be more of the same

Your heart drops when you see a picture of Rodrick sitting alone at a table

“He couldn’t even get a date?? How pathetic 💀”

Your stomach sinks as you feel your heart break for Rodrick

He doesn’t deserve this

And neither do you

Rodrick should get to enjoy his prom

And you should get to have at least one chance with him

You have to see him

You have to crash prom and tell him you’ve been crazy about him since the moment you saw him

You have to ask him to dance with you

You have to try

Realizing how much you have to do in such a short amount of time, you throw yourself out of bed

You dig through your closet until you find your sweet 16 dress

It’s not at all on brand with the unofficial theme for prom, but it will have to do

You grab shoes and some matching jewelry and get dressed in a hurry

After throwing on the slinky, glittering, hot pink evening gown, you put on a pair of matching marabou heels

Your earrings and choker accent your glittering dress, and the high slit in the floor length skirt shows off your shoes perfectly

You finish pulling yourself together and rush out the door to get to prom as fast as possible

You feel like Cinderella rushing to the ball, hoping to meet prince charming

And you really feel like you have a shot at pulling this off. 

Rodrick feels like absolute shit

He didn’t think prom could feel this awful, but here he is

Alone at a table like a total loser while everyone else is dancing and having a good time

He looked around for Ward

And found him and his girlfriend hooking up under the bleachers

And in the bathroom

And in an empty classroom

So third wheeling is officially not an option anymore

He feels like everyone is laughing at him

Some of them literally are

And in a room full of poofy pastel dresses and suits, he sticks out like a sore thumb

His outfit does kind of look like Gerard Way in the music video for Helena

But that’s obviously lost on all his mainstream pop obsessed classmates

He’s in a crowded room full of everyone in his grade

And he’s never felt more alone

This is torture

He’s about to get up and leave when the doors open on the other side of the gym

Heads turn as a gasp fills the room, followed by low murmuring

The crowd parts like Moses parting the sea, and Rodrick looks over curiously

You emerge from the graveyard of pastel tulle in a gorgeous, slinky, hot pink dress that looks like Elle Woods and Marilyn Monroe combined

And you’re looking right at him

His heart starts pounding

You walk toward him as a hush falls over the room

This can’t be real

There’s no way this is real

“Hi, Rodrick.” you say softly

He’s confused as fuck and feels like he could cry 

You actually know who he is??

You know his name???

“...Hi,” he chokes out, unsure of where the hell this is going

You look up at him with your pretty sparkly eyes and he feels like dreaming

“I…” you start, and he realizes you’re looking at him the way he looks at you, the way he’s been looking at you since he first saw you

“I never got to thank you for playing at my party.” You say softly

Thank him??

You actually liked it??

Everyone is staring at you with their jaws on the floor, but neither of you notice or care right now

He manages to choke out a response that probably sounds really stupid, but you just giggle sweetly

Are you blushing??

“Would-” you start, finally deciding to swallow your nerves and bite the bullet 

You have to go for it

You’ve never liked someone as much as you like Rodrick and if you don’t try now you’ll regret it for the rest of your life

Rodrick’s heart is hammering in his chest

You look so pretty he could die

“Do you want to dance?”

The words are out before your nerves can take over

He looks at you in disbelief 

“Yeah,” he breaths, hoping that if this is a dream that it’s one he won’t wake up from for a while

You step closer to him, but you both freeze as the next song starts playing

It’s another oversaturated top 50 pop song

You grimace in unison 

Rodrick notices your mutual distaste for the overplayed song

If you really liked loded diper…

“Uh, here,” he pulls out his headphones and offers you one

“Thanks,” you say, trying to suppress the butterflies erupting inside you

It feels intimate, sharing headphones and listening to his playlists

You fight a giddy smile and pop in the headphone as he hits shuffle

A flash of fear that you’ll judge him for his music taste and this whole beautiful dream will be ruined burns through him

Your pause as the music begins to play

Rodrick’s fear vanishes as fast as it came when you look up at him with enthusiastic sincerity

“I love Iron Maiden!”

“Really?” he asks

He thought you couldn’t surprise him anymore than you have tonight, but this just keeps getting better and better

“Yeah,” you nod, smiling brightly as you place his hands on your waist

You sway softly to the beat of the song

You rest your head on Rodrick’s chest, a banger of a song playing in one ear, and Rodrick’s thudding heartbeat in the other

Neither of you are aware of the stares, of Heather freaking out behind you, of the whispers and the gossip or one of the teachers cashing in on winning a bet that Rodrick would actually dance with someone by the end of the night

Even if you did, you wouldn’t care

Rodrick holds you tight, never wanting this night to end

His heart starts pounding harder as he looks down at you, and you pull away from him enough to look up at him

He swallows, hoping this goes well

“Me and the guys are going to see Iron Maiden next friday and I have an extra ticket, would you want to-”

You’re already nodding

“Yes!” you beam

Going to an amazing concert with the hottest guy you’ve ever seen is literally what you’ve been dreaming of for years

Rodrick lets out a chuckle, overjoyed that this worked, that he’s dancing with you and you said yes

He makes a mental note to thank his mom for forcing him to come here

But he forgets it as soon as you stretch up, pulling his face down to yours

You press a warm kiss to his lips, one full of anticipation, one you’ve both been dreaming about

He pulls you closer, melting into your touch

He thinks maybe high school isn’t as bad as he thought

[primaviva]

PAIRING: gwen stacy x fem!reader

SYNOPSIS: gwen couldn't sleep, her thoughts of you keeping her up all night. despite the snowy weather, you woke up from your sleep, exhausted and annoyed by notification that kept repeating on your phone. your expression drops when you see a text from gwen. “can i come over?”

WARNINGS: small angst, established relationship, mention of relationship problems, just fluff !!

a vibration from under your pillow is what woke you up to the chaos going on beyond your room. it has to be notification from your phone.

the snowstorm raged outside, its fury evident in the howling winds and the relentless cascade of snowflakes. as you rubbed your eyes to make sense of the blurry scenery, you watched as your block transformed into a winter wonderland, blanketed in a pristine layer of white. but instead of finding solace in the ethereal beauty of the season, you felt an undeniable restlessness that was practically gnawing at your soul. it just wasn’t the vibe it usually was. the type of feeling you’d get scrolling on pinterest and finding a picture of a window at night with stormy weather that exuded this cozy aura to it that held this perfect sense of home and ease. the type of feeling when you go to your winter playlist and play all the slow songs that just key you rock and sway while the rain outside was one fat water drop away from causing a power outage and having to wait several hours for con edison to restore it. con ed ain’t shit anyway.

the point is that yeah, these moments still and some ‘flaws’ like the aftermath of the bad weather and storms, but it brought a sense of peace. happiness, even.

to you, this moment should have been peaceful, little escape from reality, like waking up in the middle of a rainstorm and watching the rain drip down your window while you enjoy a quiet night of binging youtube videos. but for whatever reason, peace seemed impossible. everything about this moment felt wrong. something that should have been soothing and familiar was now strange and unnerving.

as the snowflakes gracefully twirled in the frigid air, your thoughts turned to gwen. the vibrant connection between you both now felt dimmed, entangled in a web of misunderstandings and unspoken words, leaving you adrift in uncertainty. the storm, relentless in its intensity, mirrored the emotions swirling within you. a mix of rage, destruction, and a sense of loss consumed you, propelling you aimlessly forward, seeking something to anchor yourself to. all these emotions were directed towards her.

lately, it seemed as though gwen had become absorbed in her own world. it wasn't just about her being spiderwoman anymore; it was everything about her that pulled her in different directions, inadvertently distancing herself from you. you guessed that the spark you had gradually lost its vitality, and what once felt so alive turned into bittersweet memories of her being replayed in your mind. disappointment lingered in the thoughts of her you had, the remnants of what could’ve been. what still can be.

it’s not like she didn’t try to be more present, it’s just that she simplified it so much that it seemed she didn’t take into account how you would feel. if she was late to a date because of her responsibilities? fine. but to not be able to swallow your pride and take accountability that you couldn’t make it on time and leave your loved one waiting in the cold? nah, not fine at all.

she never wanted to acknowledge her own flaws, instead choosing to blame them for her own wrongdoings. it was a confusing mess you couldn’t wrap your head around. you understood that she had a lot going on in her life, and it could be stressful for her. still, you didn't want her to simply say that she was there and expect everything to be fine. you didn't want her to compensate for her absences with thoughtless gifts.

you wanted action, heart, and risk. you needed her to say she’d just try and be real with you, not just for the sake of the relationship but because you both deserved it.

wrapped in a soft, cozy blanket, you felt the warmth against your body as the temperature gradually dropped in your room due to the light snowfall outside. you knew it was late without even checking the time. if you fall asleep and wake up later you’re bound to be met with an hour that’s after 12:00 am. it happens every time.

“ay, i need to get a grip on my sleep schedule before my eyes get more sunk than the titanic,” you muttered to yourself, voice groggy as you start to wake up.

it hits you as to why you woke up in the first place, your phone. you always slept with it under your bed, fearing that your crazy and overbearing guardian would try checking it at night. you wouldn't dare stop them, but at least you could lessen the chances because they can’t find it or come up with reasons why they shouldn't go through your messages. you let out a deep sigh as you sit yourself up and reach for your phone under the pillow. the screen illuminated, revealing the shocking hour of 3:00 am.

“oooh witching hour,” you mocked, but couldn't help but feel surprised at how late it was.

however, your brows quickly furrowed as you noticed a text notification from five minutes ago. it was gwen. with a tinge of reluctance on whether or not you should answer or get some sleep, you unlocked your phone and opened the message, your curiosity getting the better of you.

my gwen 🤍 : can i come over? i need to see you and i’m not sure it can wait sent at 2:55

gwen? at this hour? you squinted your eyes at the blue light as confusion swept over you at the unexpected request. you were tired. not just because you woke up in the middle of the night but because you were too exhausted to deal with this relationship bullshit right now. it seemed no matter what, nothing ever changed between the two of you. but for whatever it was worth, you responded with something quick and simple.

you : yeah ofc

you : windows open for you sent at 3:02

you put your phone on your bedside table before throwing myself back onto the pillow, patiently awaiting gwen's arrival. her tone sounded so urgent but also a little needy. desperate, almost. it made you wonder why she needed to see you at this time. what could’ve possibly drove her to this?

“hope she gets here good with all that damn snow,” you whispered to yourself while you laid your blanket back on.

raising your head, you perked up at the sound of knocking against the glass. sure enough, gwen gracefully jumps through your window and crawls inside. she was definitely annoyed about something, but it wasn't clear what or who caused it and how. in the moonlight, her blonde hair and blue eyes seemed to shimmer. her cheeks were flushed, and you noticed her slightly shivering.

as she landed on the floor, her shoes left small droplets of water and continued to drip from her jacket. she was dressed in a black turtleneck, a leather jacket, jeans, and pink converse sneakers. seeing her at her full height, gwen looked down at you with weary eyes.

"gwen," you called out, taking a few steps toward her. “everything good? i mean, what’s up with you?”

you got a little anxious as your mind raced with every possible reason as to why she came to see you. especially since she got all dressed and swung over here, not even in her suit. it was dark out and the streets were empty but it still felt risky, too risky.

closing the distance between you, you wrapped your arms around her neck, pulling the tall girl down to your height for a hug. your breath caught at the stark contrast in body temperature as the warmth radiating from your body met her chilled skin and wet clothes, which had caught small snowflakes. you felt her cautiously nuzzle her face into the crook of your neck, and a sheepish smile formed against your skin, as the warmth you offered started to bring some heat back to gwen's body.

gwen looked down at you, her eyes still glowing against the snowy backdrop. she slowly put her hands on your shoulders and pulled away quickly to stare into your eyes. her cheeks were still all pink and frigid, and she still shivered with every breath.

"you sure? it's three in the morning and you just crawled through my window lookin’ like a hot unhinged mess,” you teased. "it seemed urgent tho. you even came all the way here without your suit, gwen. that shits risky even for you," you added.

your whole body tingled as her chilly hands wrapped around your waist, drawing you in for a hug. god, she looked absolutely breathtaking in this moment. so effortlessly alluring, so damn attractive, and clearly too into you for her own good. the way her eyes lazily met yours, and her short hair accentuated by the edgy shaved undercut made her glow, made your heart race with excitement.

she was quiet, still looking at you. gwen seemed to be thinking over your words. something was definitely on her mind. she finally took a deep breath, and you could see her exhale a white mist. gwen sighed, turning her head away slightly as if she finally made the decision she was debating over.

biting her lip, she mustered the courage to speak, her voice a little shaky. "okay, i admit it's a bit risky, but i just... really, really wanted to see you." her gaze returned to meet yours, her eyes searching for understanding. "i'm here now, so can't i just stay for a little while?"

her tone shifted playfully, yet her grip on your hands remained firm. there was still a lingering sense of disconnection in the air, as if an undisclosed barrier stood between you both. gwen's presence alone was just straight up weird, and it was apparent that her mind was somewhere else. whatever it was, it seemed like she wanted to talk about it. your eyes drifted towards her slightly wet jacket. there was something hidden under it. something large, a bit bulky.

"of course, you can stay, it's just…”

you tried to speak, but the words weren’t coming to you.

you haven't seen gwen in a while. you felt so detached from her life. you heard nothing about her dad, her life, just anything. gwen always says that she's good, just fine. but every time you both talk now, it feels artificial, like small talk you do in group work with a classmate to get some social points.

the last time you truly connected on a deep emotional level was during that intense screaming match you had with her. she had been so consumed by her work as spiderwoman that she stopped talking and even seeing you for a while. it’s not like she meant to do it but you felt neglected. how else were you supposed to feel? in an attempt to apologize, she gave you flowers, and you let them wilt and die. it was symbolic almost, like a statement to her that you didn't want to be bought off with materialistic things. gwen was more than pissed at the time, thinking you were just acting petty and catching an attitude just to spite her. but you didn’t care. you didn't want her to compensate, all you truly wanted was her. you weren't interested in the clichés of romance movies with roses, love poems, and extravagantly corny displays. what mattered most in your eyes was a real, meaningful bond between the two of you.

since then, it felt as if you two had been on a break. but in the ‘freedom’ of not seeing her as often as you’d liked, it just made you realize how much you missed gwen in her absence. you missed her in every sense of the word. you missed her anger, her pain, her happiness, her love, and just the full spectrum of her being. wishing on you both just felt like false hope, and you just wanted to go back to before whatever started this rift and prevent it. maybe then your relationship wouldn't be so stagnant.

"nevermind. yes, you can stay. i don't know what i was gonna say... i'm sorry,” you hastily interjected.

gwen slowly nods as you speak. you didn’t know it for sure, but she really did miss you. she missed having these intimate moments with you. she missed you touching her and saying her name. she missed the time you spent with her before she was the woman behind the mask, open and vulnerable for you.

"i uh actually want to show you something," she mumbles and takes a step back to reveal something poking out her jacket's pocket.

"you have something for me? actually?" you asked, in shock.

though it sounded nice, you’re not sure that's what you wanted from her. you didn't want gifts, or apologies, you wanted action. you want her to tell me that she'll love you even better than before the fights and she wants to be with you. but you know gwen, and you know that's a big ask. she's not the most vocal about her feelings, that's just how she is.

you peered curiously at her, eyes drifting towards her hands as she reached inside and grabbed the hidden object in her hand before offering it to you. it was a small gift wrapped in a pink ribbon. without breaking eye contact, she hands it over.

"yeah, but it's nothing important- it is a little important! but um… it's just simple but it means something to me," she says, her eyes now leaving yours. her voice sounds more genuine now. maybe she realized there was no need to be so secretive around you.

"not important? if it's not important, why did you risk your whole identity just to pull up at my window in the middle of the night?” you questioned, voice stern.

even now, gwen still felt so closed off. she had her guard up, and it's not like you couldn't shame her for not being open, but why? why was acting this way? was she that scared to be vulnerable?

looking at the box, you were surprised that gwen did all of this. it seemed so organized and thought out. you didn't anticipate her ability to tie a ribbon so skillfully or make the box look so adorably appealing. you took the gift in my hand, before delicately loosening the ribbon and gingerly lifting the lid.

you couldn't imagine why gwen would do all of this. her eyes dart between your face and the box, anxious to see your reaction.

the box was smaller than what it looked like from afar. as you took off the top cover of the gift, inside revealed itself to be a heart-shaped locket. its exterior frame was fashioned silver while its interior was luxuriously lined with pink silk.

with a soft smile, gwen points at the picture inside of it.

"it's...it's us!" you exclaimed, realizing the significance of the image. tenderly, you lifted the locket from the box, placing the container gently on your bed. running your thumb across the smooth silver surface, you savored the tactile sensation beneath your skin.

as you gazed deeper into the photo, your eyes welled up with an overwhelming emotion. it was a snapshot of a cherished memory the night of your first date with gwen. you both had ventured to a cozy pizza place and leisurely wandered through the neighboring stores. among them was a music shack adorned with vinyl records and musical instruments. you vividly recalled how you were captivated by an album from your favorite band, and gwen, in a beautiful gesture, had purchased it for you on the spot. the memory continued to play in your mind, the walk back home, with gwen carrying all the bags, and the tender, innocent kiss you placed on her cheek. gwen had always possessed an enchanting charm that endured even to this day.

"i love it, gwen!" you exclaimed, looking up at her with a tender smile, while delicately wiping away a tear that traced down your cheek.

gwen let out a sigh of relief, her smile softening. "really? you do? i'm glad you like it," she whispered, her voice quivering slightly as she reached out and gently clasped your hand.

she didn't know what you'd think of the gift. part of you felt a little strange, even though this type of gift wasn’t odd it was just weird to you how much the locket touched your heart. maybe it's the meaning of it, a memory of a time when things between you and gwen flourished.

gwen's gaze shifted to the locket, and she was transported back to that magical night as if it had occurred just yesterday. every detail remained etched in her memory— the captivating scent of your hair, the warmth of your smile, how beautiful you looked.

"i remember when we walked home that night,” she murmured, her voice tinged with nostalgia.

gwen takes a step closer. it seems like she wants to say something, but she chooses to stay quiet. she still looked wet and chilly, but your eyes were drawn to her lips and she leaned just close enough that you could kiss her if you so desired.

you found yourself fixated on her lips, the allure and temptation becoming almost irresistible. the desire to feel the warmth of her mouth against yours, to experience the tenderness and intimacy it promised, was overwhelming.

but then your eyes shifted up to gwen's tired gaze. her eyes looked sunken and dark, like she hadn't been getting any sleep. you could tell she was losing sleep over you, over your relationship. she stayed up, wondering how to make things better. that's why she gave you that locket, as a way to hold onto the good times and try to fix the mess she had created between you.

the memories haunted gwen, particularly the occasion when her duties as spiderwoman had caused her to arrive late to your birthday celebration. she saw you talking and laughing with everyone else while she sat in the corner, feeling unworthy of your attention. she said sorry, but her apologies were laced with excuses. she'll never forget the look of anger on your face when you expressed how your friends had questioned her absence, making them doubt your relationship with her even more.

but there were also those moments that made her heart soar. like that september night when she broke down and told you everything, her secrets, her regrets, and you held her tight. or the times when you were just together, enjoying the beauty of nature, and she couldn't take her eyes off you, especially when you laughed at her jokes. being with you, your company, your comfort, it made her realize that she was undeniably in love with you.

"gwen," you called out, breaking free from your reverie. "you look exhausted. why did you really come here? i know there's more you want to say, and i won't push you, but please... talk to me for once.”

gwen's eyes widen as you call her out. she looks down at you, almost in a pleading way.

gwen's soft voice crackles a little as she speaks. “i just,” she whispers, her eyes darting to the floor. her face is flushed and her chest begins to rise and fall at a rapid pace. your words seemed to help bring her out of the fog in her thoughts. "i've just been feeling so stressed lately and i just really miss you. i just want things to go back to the way they were between us, you know? i want us to have another one of the good moments. but i feel like things are falling apart.”

you can see tears welling up in her eyes.

"gwen, talk to me," you pleaded, putting the locket down.

you just wanted her to swallow her pride and fears. no, i needed her to. you needed her to just apologize, be real and open with you, not just compensate for the guilt she feels or how she wants to make you feel better.

it was december. and as the scene unfolded with the snow and rain coming through, so did the darkness and the cold of your relationship. all you gave her was love and open arms, but it seemed all gwen gave back was goodbyes.

with a tender touch, you grasped her shoulders, gazing up at her while your own demeanor softened. "please talk, gwen."

gwen closed her eyes. she took a few deep breaths to help calm her nerves and clear her head, but that didn't help much. as she looked into your soft eyes, gwen sighed. she wanted to talk to you so badly. tell you all the things she felt about you, and tell you why she was so scared to tell you all these things. the cold breeze that blew through the window was starting to make her shiver, but she still held eye contact with you as she spoke.

"i'm just struggling so much,” gwen confessed, her voice shaky. “i feel your disappointment in me all the time. i miss the old us sometimes, when things were just so easy. i know i've been working so hard as spiderwoman, and i don't regret it… but i just want you. i want to be with you so badly and feel like i keep messing up no matter what i do.”

her gaze slowly drifted away, fixating on the ground as her fingers clutched her sleeves in an attempt to ward off the encroaching chill. the freezing cold began seeping into her veins, numbing her hands and leaving a tingling sensation.

"gwen," you mumble, taken aback by her honesty. "but why? why feel compelled to do this all now?"

to gwen, it felt like wishful thinking or a dream that gives you relief and a sense of joy as you fall deeper into sleep. it would be a dream to save this relationship. but in gwen's eyes, it feels so far and out of her reach, like everything was too late.

gwen wanted you, but she struggled. and if she could just go back, have another chance and attempt to be the perfect lover, she'd love you right.

she looked down sadly and thought about how to respond without messing up. “i don’t know,” gwen sighed as she put a hand over her mouth in frustration before continuing, “i just don't want to lose you. i want a do over. and i want you to know how much i still love you. i have so many regrets about how i've treated you in the past.”

gwen put her hands over her face, letting out a deep breath. "please, just give me another chance,” she begged.

gwen was a mess, you could tell by the way she was acting. her mind hazy, her thoughts unsure, and it seemed the only clear thing in her mind was you. all she could think of was you. she says she doesn't know why she came here so late, but that can't be true. what compels someone to leave their home in this weather and at this time. you couldn't accept that.

now, she pleads for another chance, as if the relationship has already slipped through your fingers. yes, she's hurt you in the past but it's not like she intended to. it doesn't make it right at all, but she sounds so sorrowful.

but there was a glimmer of hope because all this time, this is what you needed from her. for her to just promise herself to you, say she'll be better, say she'll try her best, say she'll love you right. you didn't want broken promises that she knows she can't always fulfill, you just wanted her to try. the effort that shows she cares for you to try and be better.

"this kept you up at night? reminiscing about another chance with me while i'm right in front of you? gwen, i've been here! i'm still your girlfriend. you can't just wish to go back to how things were and fix everything. you also can't try to replicate the past in hopes the present will feel just as perfect. that isn't realistic!"

you were frustrated more than you were angry. no matter what you always felt like gwen was so far away from your wants and needs.

"i know! but... i can't stand how things are right now," she responds with a soft but frustrated tone.

gwen looked down sadly, hands trembling as you raised your voice and spoke to her so bluntly. she took a deep breath, trying to compose herself. her voice starts to break with every word. she knew you were right— her thinking wasn't realistic. she was so caught up in herself and her regrets that she didn't realize how she was hurting you too. as much as she wanted, gwen couldn't change the past. she couldn't change the present if she just sat still and felt sorry for herself. she also couldn't create a perfect relationship.

"all we do anymore is fight... you just have no idea how much i miss you.” she admitted, voice trembling. “i miss all the hugs and the kisses and the time we used to spend together.” gwen adverted her gaze, overwhelmed by shame. “i hate who i've become. i hate that this is my life now. what happened to me?”

her statement turned more into a question. she couldn’t believe she let this happen, how she let the suit and her own problems take over your relationship.

"so, what are you gonna do about it?" you questioned, your voice carrying a stern tone.

you yearned for gwen to challenge herself. while she used to let her guard down in the past, now you only caught glimpses of what lay behind closed doors. that's just what's happening right now. she isn't telling you much, nor is she speaking much with the small information she gives. it's just a peak behind the gate to her life. you wished she would finally confide in you, or else it would all mean nothing. just like the roses, just like every other time.

gwen looks back at you with a little bit of a stunned look. as the snow comes down hard, she thinks about how you're waiting for her to say the 'magic' words. the words that will fix all your relationship's problems and make this all go away. but she was gripped by fear, unable to voice her true feelings. she gently bit her lip, struggling to hold back tears that threatened to spill.

"i'm going to make it right,” she declared, taking a hesitant step closer to you, tears welling in her eyes. she had to say something else. she didn't say she'd try, like she did last time.

her voice still trembled, her eyes glistening from the tears she was still trying to hold back. if you said this to her even a month ago, she would have gotten mad at you for implying that she hadn't been good enough for you, even if it was true. but right now, gwen was determined to be better.

she was scared, but she clung to hope.

“i'm going to love you right," gwen affirmed, her voice quivering. "i swear."

your breath hitched as she closed the distance, your bodies brushing against each other. you couldn't believe it, your mind was spinning. it was like she was a whole new person. gwen had swallowed her pride, her fears, her frustrations and dedicated herself to you.

"h-how?" you managed to choke out, still taken aback by the unexpected turn of events.

she wanted to pull out all the stops. there was a part of her that was scared of making big promises, but she couldn't think straight as you kept staring at her, anticipating what she was going to say. she was nervous about the consequences of making such promises and how much they would weigh on her, but to her, it was worth it. you made it worth it.

"i'm going to tell you the truth. i'm going to tell you how i feel, i'm going to spend more time with you and i promise, no more secrets. even when i don't have time i'll at least call you to tell you why. i'm never going to just leave you sitting in the dark ever again. i've been hurting you for so long. it's time to change that,” she promised.

it felt different, the way she wanted you to understand exactly how serious she was about this.

"i'm going to be yours.”

there was no trace of fear in her eyes, no inclination to retreat from the intimacy and close herself off once more. she stood before you, open and honest. for the first time in a long while, you truly saw her. you saw gwen.

your face heated up as you heard the words ‘be yours’ leave her lips. you felt myself get giddy again, like a little kid. this was the gwen you always knew. the gwen that was a charmer, who was able to fluster you with her raw thoughts of how beautiful you were or the simplest of wordings like calling you hers.

it felt like she was being honest, truthful. you start to tear up at her words.

“gwen,” you mumbled, your voice trembling as you rubbed your eyes.

gwen smiled as she wiped the tears away on your face. she was lost in you, for everything that you were, for everything that you still were in her heart.

"shhh, don't cry, babe. i love you, you know that, right? i love you, and i just want to be more honest with you," she spoke softly, her words a soothing balm to your heart.

it was difficult to maintain eye contact with gwen as she lovingly brushed away your tears, but you mustered the strength to gaze into her mesmerizing watercolor eyes. she had become so committed, so brave.

is that why she came, she just couldn't hold it in anymore? just the mere knowledge that your relationship was like this, she didn't have the strength to fight off waiting till the next day or whenever she planned to do this?

"i love you too, gwen... so much," you sobbed, your voice filled with sincerity.

gwen was rendered speechless for a few moments. the snow continued to fall outside, gently obscuring the windows. the world seemed hushed, still, as if you both were the only two people around.

“i’m here, all yours," she whispered, her breath mingling with yours, her eyes darting between your lips and your gaze.

before you knew it, she leaned in for a kiss. at first it was a soft kiss, but then gwen slowly parted her lips gently and let her tongue wander. her teeth met with yours and she moaned softly, kissing me with all the passion she had been holding in these months.

this kiss was everything she wanted you to know.

it was like a dream. every kiss from before was just a shadow of this moment. gwen kissed you like there was no tomorrow. like she was trying to make up for every moment gone unsaid and unshared. she just kept on kissing you, holding your neck and your hair in her hands. when she finally pulled away, her face was flushed, and her eyes sparkled with a light you hadn't seen in far too long.

gwen's heart skipped a beat. she felt butterflies in her stomach as she kissed you like this. you felt so new but so familiar at the same time. she pulled away from the kiss and let herself exhale. she couldn't believe how happy she felt in this moment. gwen was yours. and you were hers.

you wrapped your arms around her and hugged her, wanting to feel her warm embrace. just hearing her say she's here for you was so comforting. and her saying that she was all yours made your cheeks heat up. it was so reassuring.

nestling against her taller frame, tears painted wet streaks on her black turtleneck as you found solace in her comforting presence. her hands found their way around your waist, and you could feel the warmth of her touch as you pressed against her. with a soft smile, you pulled back slightly, gazing into her eyes.

"can you put it on me? the locket," you asked.

gwen's warm smile radiated affection as she gently wiped away the remaining tears. with a soft chuckle, she took the locket from your hand. "of course."

her hands settled on your waist, and she slowly spun you around until your back was pressed against her chest. the distinct click of the locket's clasp reached your ears as she held it above your head, delicately encircling your neck. a shiver cascaded down your spine as her cool breath ghosted against your neck, emphasizing the closeness between you. her fingers brushed the nape of your neck as she deftly fastened the hooks of the locket.

"there you go," she whispered, turning you around to face her, her hand gently resting on your back.

your hand delicately cradled the locket, holding it close to your chest as you admired its beauty. a soft chuckle escaped your lips, your eyes sparkling with delight.

"it's beautiful," you murmured, your voice filled with awe and genuine appreciation.

that was what gwen missed. the moments where she felt like she fell in love with you all over again. the sound of your laughter, the lines that formed around your eyes when you smiled, and the happy yet exhausted look on your face right now that made you look even more adorable in gwen's eyes.

gwen's heart started racing as you started to laugh and smile. this was one of the moments she missed most. she didn't want to lose you, and right now, she could finally feel all the old gwen— like feelings wash over her again. now that you're both here, things finally feel right. gwen smiled as she watched you, content with the moment you were both in. for a split second, it felt as if time had stood still. after being apart for so long, she finally got to experience the version of you that had captured her heart. you looked so happy, so relaxed, so yourself. you were just being you, just like she remembered.

"and you're beautiful," gwen replied, a playful smirk on her face as she gazed at you.

blushing under her gaze, you mumbled a quiet thank you, your fingers idly playing with the chain of the locket.

a comfortable silence enveloped the room until the sudden heavy downpour of rain drummed forcefully against the window. the storm outside intensified, with the snowfall marrying the wind and rain in a furious dance. startled by the abrupt sound, you flinched in wen's arms, and she instinctively caught you, holding you closer.

glancing at the time, you realized it was already 4:00 am. she had been here for over an hour already. we both lost track of the time so much so that the storm outside had started to get worse.

gwen looked outside of the window and noticed the storm. her eyes widened as she thought about what her dad would think if he caught her sneaking out like this.

"i should probably be heading back now... it's getting late. sorry, i just... lost track of time, i guess," she confessed, clearing her throat.

looking back at you, her expression soft. she hated that she had to leave you right now, but she knew she needed to get home soon.

you nodded, understanding the situation, and pulled her into a hug. gratitude filled your voice as you spoke.

"thanks gwen, for y'know coming in the middle of the night like this. even if you didn't plan on it, it means a lot to me. i know you meant what you said, and everytime i think of december i'm gonna go back to this memory. i don't want us to be perfect, because everything is flawed, but isn't that what makes stuff..beautiful? interesting? maybe it's just my exhaustion talking… but thank you." you expressed sincerely, offering her a tender smile.

gwen's eyes were already tearing up yet again, she was feeling all the emotions she was fighting back again, just to keep her calm and focused. now that you both were alone and they've been honest with each other again, she just feels so overwhelmed by happiness.

"i won't forget this night either. it was good to finally talk with you again, and i hope this is the beginning of us being like this again," she replied, her smile radiant. "you should probably go get some sleep. it's so late, and you need a full day's rest if you want to keep up with me, remember?"

her lighthearted joke elicited a laugh from you, and you nodded in agreement.

"yeah, i'm pretty sleepy. and you should start heading back before your dad realizes you're missing," you teased, a playful glint in your eyes.

"mhm, yeah, i should probably be heading back now. my dad's going to kill me if he finds out i'm out here alone this late... i'm glad we talked, though. i really am," she spoke, her voice filled with sincerity.

she shot you a small smile before walking toward your window, pausing to look back at you. "sorry for the wet floor- i guess i just couldn't wait. haha... i'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

you chuckled at how nervous she became as you changed the topic of conversation.

"tomorrow," you repeated, observing the snowflakes swirling down. the beauty of the snow was marred by its inconvenience. you watched as gwen adjusted her leather jacket before leaping out of your window.

as she departed, you couldn't resist savoring her presence for one last moment.

"wait, gwen," you whispered urgently, careful not to wake the entire house.

gwen turned back, peering up from the bottom of your window ledge, holding onto it for support. hurrying over, you leaned down and looked at her.

gwen appeared slightly confused as she gazed up at you. she hadn't expected you to call out her name.

"what is it, babe? is everything okay?" she asked in a hushed voice. the wind and rain were loud, making it difficult to hear each other unless you were close.

you could see the concern on her face, realizing she didn't want to leave. she cherished this time with you and was starting to fear parting ways.

"i... um..." words failed you, unable to articulate what you wanted to express to her. you poked your head through the window, greeted by the cold outside and snowflakes delicately landing on your skin and hair. closing your eyes briefly, you leaned down and kissed her, a soft and tender peck, all too brief.

gwen was both curious about your intentions and taken aback by the unexpected kiss. her entire body warmed as she quickly reciprocated, her cheeks flushing as she gazed up at you, rendered speechless.

"get home safe," you said, pulling back, your lips barely inches apart. even in a quiet tone, gwen could hear your words as you looked at her shyly.

"i will, don't worry. get some sleep, alright?" she reassured you, then turned and started descending the ledge.

with those parting words, she smiled and glanced back at you before leaping off, disappearing into the snowy night.

nodding in response to her words, you returned her smile with a small one of your own.

as she vanished into the darkness veiled by the falling snow, you made your way to bed, switched off the lights, and drifted off to sleep.

gwen blushed as she saw you waving to her. she smiled softly and waved back before turning away and continuing to swing towards her house. her heart fluttered, and a yawn escaped her as she soared through the air. it was late, and the snowfall intensified with each passing moment. the thought of her father discovering she was out this late worried her, but it was all worth it. grinning, she swung through the storm.

arriving at her house, gwen opened her window and climbed back into her room. the cold air brushed against her skin, and she let out a contented sigh. sitting on her bed, she reflected quietly. she was exhausted, yet the thought of you made her feel alive.

"i'll love her right," she whispered to herself.

for a few more seconds, the snow continued to fall outside, until finally, all was quiet once more.

A/N: starting off the speak now series………..omg

© 2023 primaviva

[moony-mari]

1:58 am - lando norris 

Lando norris x fem!reader Summary: 1:58 am the time he walked out of your life or 1:58 am the time he walked back into your life Warnings: hurt/comfort. angst. fluff. max is max fewtrell, italics are flashbacks a/n: put my playlist on shuffle and started writing! Hope you like it send me requests if you want an idea to be written! 

☆☆☆☆

1:58 am the exact time he walked out of your shared apartment leaving you alone, tears cascading down your face as you wondered why he went away. 

Your knees gave out as you sank to the couch, tears blurring your eyes as you opened your phone, your heart clenching as you looked at the photo of lando that lit up the dim room. Immediately you opened your email drafting  a letter of resignation to send to all the quadrant members. 

Placing your phone down, you began to walk around the apartment, memories flooding your mind 

The rain hit the windows harshly causing you and Lando to look at eachother “we're gonna get soaked” he laughed. You'd gone out for dinner and decided it was a good idea to walk to to the restaurant completely forgetting how brutal the UK weather can be 

“I guess we'll have to run home. You wanna race me lan?”

“You don't stand a chance” he smirked at you as he took your hand and led you to the door. 

He was right, you couldn't win,completely drenched hair dripping you finally caught up to him trying to catch your breath ”you could've let me win arsehole” 

“Where's the fun in that baby” he took your hand, and as if on queue music started playing from the car parked on the side “let's dance” 

You're not much for dancing but for him you did. And so you danced in the rain, laughing like a bunch of idiots. Lando pulled you in for a sweet kiss which you gladly reciprocated, until you jumped the honk of a car breaking you apart.

“Do you want to come home or are you just gonna keep standing in the rain all night?” max called 

“Oi you muppet you played the song didn't you? You should’ve shouted us before” 

“Believe it or not i actually like you two together so i gave you a cute moment don't worry i got pictures and videos so i expect a thank you”

“Thank you max” you giggled at his antics and pulled lando to the car 

You placed the frame face down not wanting to remember anymore, the hole in your heart only growing as you continued to roam through the dark halls, leading to your bedroom. Checking your phone one more time pleading for a message a call anything to tell you that he was okay and that he was coming home 

☆☆☆☆

Nov 20th was the date. 2 weeks. 14 days. Complete radio silence. Your resignation had not gone down well. Max showing up to your place pleading with you to come back saying Lando was an idiot for what he did and how you shouldn't throw 3 years of hard work at quadrant because Lando was being a dipshit. Ria and the boys spammed you with messages.you told them you’d finish all the videos scheduled this year but after that you were done. You couldn't work with him anymore. 

How could you go back? 9 years of friendship and a 4 year relationship down the drain like it meant nothing. you’ve been there since the beginning. You held him while he cried and celebrated with him after a good race. But most importantly you loved him. You thought he loved you too. 

Dread consumed you as ria dropped off your abu dhabi paddock passes reminding you that quadrant scheduled a video filming the last race of the year from the mclaren garage. You had no choice but to go. It was work after all. So you packed your bags (full of Lando's hoodies that still smell like him) , got on the plane and checked into your room on wednesday night.Declining offers to go out because you knew he'd be there and you weren't ready to face him yet. 

Saturday rolled around (too quickly) and you were getting ready to go to the paddock to watch quali. The Mclarens had been looking unbelievable this weekend, the progress they've made throughout the year clearly showing with both of the drivers being at the top in both fp1 and fp2. Your mind wandered to the possibility of Lando winning a race. Your heart clenched. A knock on your door brought you back to reality. “Are you almost ready, love quali is starting in 30 minutes? The cars waiting in the lobby ” ria spoke through the door. You grabbed what you needed and headed out. 

As predicted, Oscar finished fp3 in p1 with Lando just behind. Your heart rate was skyrocketing as you walked closer to the McLaren garage.Max knew how hard this was for you so he pulled you aside “i've known you for 9 years. I know when you're not okay. I know this is hard but this is the last time you'll be with us. Forget lando. I mean quadrant. Aarav, steve, ethan ,niran, ria, me the people you've spent the last few years with building this brand so enjoy yourself. I may be Lando's best friend but you know you'll always have me.” 

Tears pooled in your eyes as you hugged him pouring everything into it not being able to answer him verbally. You wiped your tears and continued to walk to the garage with Max next to you. 

Luckily Lando was already in the car when you got there so you settled into the familiar garage missing the feeling of watching live from the garages. Quali  went past in a blur and now all you could focus on was Lando's car going round the track setting purple sectors all around. Screams erupted as he crossed the finish line and secured pole position. Hugging all your friends and fully embracing the moment.

Lando soon made it back into the garage and Max gave you the heads up so you could go back to the hotel. You knew you'd have to face him tomorrow but maybe tomorrow you would be ready. You settled into bed and hoped you would be okay and drifted off to sleep. 

Loud knocking woke you up. Looking around for your phone you checked the time. 1:58 am. Walking up to the door thinking it was just ria you pulled on a hoodie and opened the door.You wrong. Lando stood on the opposite end of the door. Bags under his eyes and his cheeks more hollow than you remembered  he just stood there defeated. Until he finally broke the silence that consumed all the air around you

“Can I come in?” 

[kiss-me-muchoo]

𝐖𝐞’𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 || 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠!𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

part one: we’ll be safe and sound || part two: isn’t it delicate?

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲_ Lucy Gray Baird was once your best friend. But Coriolanus Snow arrived and it was you who had them both charmed up. Where Coriolanus returns to the Capitol thinking he killed two women. Only to be surprised to realise that he doomed the bright prospect of his future.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬_ ANGST, kinda Lucy Gray x Coryo x reader, chasing, blood, slight gore if you imagine some scenes, poisonous berries, mentions of aphrodisiacs, drowning, violence, this gets slightly dark.

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞_ this is one of my favourite fics ab Coriolanus so far. Main songs are Safe and Sound (Taylor’s version), can’t catch me now again and triste verano lol. Part two is going to be the aftermath of this btw

♪ ♫ awful Coriolanus Snow playlist ✰ Index (+ fics here)

__________________________________________________________

The water was warm. The soft rocks at the bottom made it slippery to stand still. But you did your best to stay there, looking at your friends laughing and playing where the water was deep.

“I can’t do it.” You say, shaking your head.

“You’re such a baby. Of course, you can!” The girl beside laughs at you and gently pushes you.

“Lucy Gray! I swear if you push me again I’m killing you” she laughs harder.

“Lucky me I know how to swim and you don’t”

“Relax. Just take my hand, I’m not letting you drown” Slowly, you take her hand, letting Lucy Gray guide you deeper into the water.

“I’m closing my eyes” you warn her. She rolls her eyes and laughs. The voices of your friends and the splashing sounds closer. At the same time, you feel the water has reached your chest. And it sends you on spirals.

“It’s okay. Just let go…” You’re holding Lucy Gray’s hand too tight. But as you reach further, you start making a big attempt to float. That’s when Lucy Gray grabs both of your hands to help you.

She finds your furrowed brows and insecure face funny and cute at the same time.

After some existential nights, the young girl questioned if she had ever felt such a strong connection with anyone as she did with you.

No. Never.

“Lucy Gray!” When she comes back to reality, she smiles shocked. She had dropped your hands but you had managed to keep floating. You were swimming.

“See? You did it!” Some of the members of The Covey cheer and you smile and laugh at their jokes.

“Told ya’. You’re just a baby” You poke your tongue out and she just makes fun of you.

“So funny. Shouldn’t you be at the market helping Maude Ivory to sell the necklaces we made?” Lucy Gray rolls her eyes again.

“Shouldn’t you be home?” It’s noon, almost dark. And yes, you should be home.

“I should.” To Lucy Gray, it was a disappointment to see that you never shared anything about your family or home. She just knew your mother’s family was from District 4, nothing else.

“Go home. I don’t want you to get scolded.” She was too sweet. Too sweet that you questioned if Lucy Gray Baird was your best friend.

“Petal, I’m almost eighteen…” one of the girls threw you a towel as soon as you made it out of the lake. After thanking her, you slip into your black sundress, which captures your alleged best friend’s attention.

“Why the black dress?” As a colour lover, you supposed Lucy Gray was hating your dress.

“It was the first thing I grabbed,” you admit, drying your hair with the towel.

“It looks like you’re going to a field funeral.”

“Maybe I was. In case I happened to have died in the lake” you joke, making her splash you. Lucy Gray noticed at that moment that you used many words that sounded too educated.

“Do you trust me so little?” She asked as she watched you leave.

“You know I trust whoever is loyal to me.” And with that, you disappeared through the trees.

There was something on you that intrigued Lucy Gray. And soon there will be two.

…

One night, at the hob, Lucy Gray is performing with The Covey and you are seated, smiling at her and your friends. Then all of a sudden, a certain blonde and tanned boy reaches for you.

“Y/N!” You hear your name and once you turn, you spot your two new friends.

“Sejanus, hey!” He offers you a little hug but it’s nothing compared to when Coriolanus Snow got closer.

“Coriolanus…” he literally falls into your open arms, his arms snaking around your hips with so much disguise that it makes you blush at the intimacy.

“I’ve told you… you can call me Coryo” You smile at him, inspecting his charming blue eyes that still made you get lost like the first day.

“Right… Well, it’s nice to see you, Coryo” he wants to chuckle. As Sejanus gets lost to get a drink, the blonde man takes a seat beside you.

“How has your training been? Hopefully not too hard.” You ask and wonder. Coriolanus was a peacekeeper in training. You met him almost three weeks ago, and somehow he made you very happy.

“I’m used to it now. The first days were the worst” you nod, turning back to see Lucy Gray and cheer for her.

Meanwhile, Coriolanus looked at you. Even your profile was a mystery to him. There was something about you that made him feel at home. Maybe it was your mannerisms that were very… Capitol. And that’s the thing, he didn’t know you. Yet, there was something that urged Coriolanus to unveil you. And that has started to make him question his feelings for Lucy Gray.

The moment you knew Coriolanus was Capitol, you started putting everything in a balance. And as you spent days talking outside of The Covey House and the lake, you realised you had started to put an eye on him.

When you turned to see the young man, you were surprised to see him already looking at you.

“What?” You ask, smiling. He replies by looking down, cheeks slightly flushed with pink.

“Nothing.” Your hand sneaks around your neck, and you feel it naked. You have lost your necklace.

Coriolanus sees how you start looking at the table, then the floor, looking out for something.

“What happened?”

“My necklace. I think I lost it… damn it” he starts helping you.

“Maybe it fell at the entrance” he suggests. So together we leave the hob. All under the fixated look of Lucy Gray. Who kept singing but the feeling on her chest made her uneasy.

The necklace doesn’t appear.

“It was just a necklace. But…” you sigh, leaning against the wall of the alley. Just a golden chain, no pendant, nothing.

Coriolanus can only see your features under the moonlight, ignoring the necklace issue. You have a beautiful dress under an oversized cardigan. With or without the necklace, you look gorgeous.

“It was a present. From my sixteenth birthday”

“Have mine.” You look at him before giggling. He takes his tag, a silver chain with his name on it. The young man thinks you would like him even more by offering his tag to you. He wants you to become closer to him. But the offer could be seen as wrong.

“I can’t take it, Coryo�� he gets closer and the proximity makes you avoid his eyes. Only to land your vision on his hand taking yours.

He slips the tag in your palm, it’s still warm.

This is the most intimate moment you’ve shared with him. And you don’t know how to feel about it.

“At least until you get a new necklace” he suggests, offering a little smile. You can see he has no moles around his face, barely visible freckles maybe. His skin is very clear and his lips…

As you’re too focused on analysing his face, you accept the chain. And for some reason, you let him play with your cold fingers.

“Until then…” he leans closer, and the air suddenly feels fogged. It could be just another humid summer night.

But no, it was because Coriolanus Snow was less than two inches away from kissing you.

His free hand was ready to land behind your neck, just to slightly push you towards him and finally discover what your lips felt like.

“Where were you two?…” the side door of the hob opened. And like two volts, you and Coriolanus separate from each other. You grasp his tag tightly around your hand in a fist.

Lucy Gray had seen the interaction.

“Just looking for y/n’s necklace,” Coriolanus said first, walking away from you.

“Oh. Well, we were just waiting for you two. They want to start a round with beers” the girl said, rolling her eyes and giggling, pretending very well.

“Let’s go then…” Coriolanus walked past her, smiling at her like nothing happened. You tried to do the same. But Lucy Gray grabbed your forearm, stopping you from entering the hob behind the young man.

“Say the truth. Are you falling in love with him?” You frown, slightly irritated at the question.

“Of course not. I barely know him.” You replied a little too harshly. She nodded, silently believing you.

“You know I’ll never be the woman who wrecks a relationship.” She takes your word a little wounded. Seeing how you enter the hob quietly.

She just stares at the sky. You had been a good friend and she trusted you. Lucy Gray was having a little crisis. She questioned at that very moment if she actually loved Coriolanus.

Certainly not. She didn’t trust him at the beginning. Seeing him almost kissing you, was making her not trust him at the end. And Lucy Gray knew. You were so loyal to ever intentionally get involved in some affair. You preached to Not do what you don’t want to happen to you.

But the truth is that you would wreck a relationship. Unintentionally, but twice.

…

It was you who discovered a pomegranate tree near The Covey House. The branches were long and the season of pomegranates was until late summer, but somehow, in August, the tree was blossoming a couple of red beats.

Near the house, the nomad group had built some locations to make their lives easier. Like some stations to wash clothes and eat. Maude Ivory was sick, she started with a sore throat and she developed a stomach infection later. So you suggested picking their laundry. And since you spent more time with The Covey rather than your family, it wasn’t rare for Coriolanus to find you folding some dresses that were once hanging on a tightrope between two trees.

He stepped on a branch and it made you jump startled.

“Gosh! You scared me!” you squeaked after seeing Coriolanus standing there with his peacekeeper uniform. He grinned, leaving his little backpack on the table. He spotted a little basket filled with pomegranates.

“You picked all this?” He asked, pointing at the basket.

“Yes. It was a big surprise to see pomegranates in August. They start their season at the end of the month or September.”

“I never thought you would be that kind of girl?” You frowned laughing, turning back to fold the dresses into another basket.

“What kind, Coriolanus?” Shortly after, you know he is behind you. You can feel his breath in the nape of your neck, and it sends shivers to your spine.

“The kind who climbs trees and folds laundry while singing” your cheeks immediately go red. He had heard you sing previously.

“You heard me?”

“Indeed. Very pretty voice,” he said after sensing how embarrassed you were.

“I don’t sing. And you really shouldn’t be here. Lucy Gray was looking for you” You state firmly. Realising how much anyone could misinterpret the situation if they find you almost tangled up with Coriolanus Snow behind you.

“She was gone when I arrived here.”

“Oh…” you say, taking the basket with the laundry. When Coriolanus sees that you are also going to grab the one with the pomegranates, he stops you.

“Let me help you…” he takes the one with the fruit.

“Thank you.” He grabs your hand again, and it makes you weak. But you remember your dear friend. And the loyalty you preach.

“You can’t do this, Coryo. Not to her, not you. And not to me…” he sighs. Honestly, he didn’t want to hurt either one. But it was you who he was always trying to describe. It was you making him laugh so much. And it was you who made him feel like… home. Like…Capitol.

“You make me feel different.” You roll your eyes.

“And how did she make you feel in the first place?” They met at the Capitol. While you prayed for Lucy Gray’s survival at the Hunger Games. Boys could be liars.

“Lucy Gray made me feel like I had an option away from home.”

“But… you make me feel like I can have both. I can have this…” he says looking down at the pomegranates and folded laundry.

“And also… what I had there.” You have to look away. You see the trees and how some leaves fall because of the breeze.

“You’ll have to choose one day…” he nods, but he’s so close to you. He can see every detail of your delicate face. So as much as he tries to resist the urges, he ends up leaning closer. Your lips brush his and it’s magical. You really want to kiss him too.

“Doesn’t have to be today. Right?” His comment makes you almost retreat. And before you can walk away he pulls you to his chest again, finally kissing you.

He’s soft, yet passionate and intense. His right-hand finds comfort in the back of your neck while the other lands on your chin, deepening the kiss. For you, it’s an automatic response to put your arms around his neck.

As the kiss turns more desperate, the hand on your chin ends up pushing your lower back and you have to suppress a moan when you feel the clear outline of his manhood poke at your lower belly and part of your pelvis. It’s not enough to the fire you both initiated, but you have to stop.

Both of you pant for air and somehow he ends up smiling.

“Until the day you choose. This never happened.” You say firmly, but slowly, and you also smile at him.

Your smile was enough to keep him calm on the way back. Unconsciously, both of you feel like silly kids. Shyly walking side by side with baskets in your hands.

“So you couldn’t swim?” Coriolanus asks after some minutes walking to The Covey House.

“I couldn’t. Most of my family is from District 4. It’s embarrassing, to be honest.” He assumed you were also from there. And he couldn’t help but think that District 4 was closer than the 12 from the Capitol. Immediately he brushed away the thought.

“But Lucy Gray taught me. Kind of a violent teacher, but it was still great” you admit laughing. And Coriolanus was blushed. Surprisingly, he found himself on the verge of being jealous. Yes, of Lucy Gray teaching you how to swim.

Through the trail, one of the boys from The Covey appears, he looks too sweaty and tired, gasping and desperate.

“Y/N! Is Maude. She has a lot of fever and we don’t know what to do” You immediately worry, starting at a faster pace, followed by Coriolanus.

“Where is Lucy Gray?” You ask. The boy shrugs guiding you to their home.

“We don’t know. She’s nowhere near.” You sigh.

As soon as you make it inside, you find the girl lying on a couch, sweating and panting. Your heart broke as you kneeled beside her.

“Maude? You are going to be fine.” She seems to have identified you and slowly nodded.

Coriolanus follows you as you run to their improvised kitchen. You mix some herbs and boil them with water.

“Coryo, please hand me the honey.” He looks around to see a glass with honey and hands it to you.

And then, Coriolanus swears he fell in love with you as you treated Maude Ivory, immediately making her rest.

…

One night, Lucy Gray is oddly quiet. You know something’s up. So when you gently caress her shoulder, she lets out a long breath before spilling everything.

“Coriolanus shot Billy Taupe and the mayor’s daughter.” Your eyes widened, before letting a shocked gasp.

“What?” Lucy Gray nodded, confirming the facts to you.

“He did it to protect me and Sejanus. But…”

“This is bad. You know how this district is. Rumours will spark, the people will talk…” you spiral about it too panicked.

“I don’t want you nor Coriolanus to get in more trouble. What if-“

“It’ll be fine. We’ll be safe…” she hugs you, hearing how you tried to hide your sobs from her. She continues to share what happened and where the murder weapon was. She encourages you to keep the secret and play pretend until the waters soothed.

The waters only get worse. Like the tides form hours before a tsunami. After a peaceful morning, you find Lucy Gray at the market. You eat half a sandwich with her and you share that your mother was worried about the rumours. Including the fact that the authorities were starting to turn their heads towards Lucy Gray. She acts calm and used to have people talking about her. But being accused of murder was something different.

And it only gets worse when you two get closer to the chaos. Where Sejanus Plinth and the man who hid the murder weapon were hanged for treason. Lucy Gray takes your hand as you cover your mouth in shock.

You are able to see Coriolanus. The panic on his face is evident enough to make you feel uneasy. And that’s when Lucy Gray plans something.

You listen to her tell Coriolanus about leaving the districts. There are feelings of nausea, sadness, and stress washing all over you. That is abruptly cut by the couple turning to see you.

“Did you listen, y/n?” Lucy Gray asks. You stay quiet.

“Come with us. Please” she adds. You look at Coriolanus. His face doesn’t express anything, but he really wants you to agree. He knows it is a bad idea, he knows that is dangerous. But he wants to have you too.

You have plenty of reasons to stay. A little family, a home, a future. Which was certainly unsure for your dear people. They had nothing to lose.

Half of you were unsure, afraid of growing up and not being able to make it. So you had two options. And you weren’t ready to make a decision.

“Please, y/n. You’re my best friend. I can’t make it without you” Time never passed apparently. Lucy Gray and Coriolanus were still looking at you, waiting for some answer.

Your tongue gets loose before you can’t think clearly.

“I’ll come.” Coriolanus sees how the girl hugs you tightly. And he knows there’s no way back. He doesn’t know what to expect about this.

After agreeing to meet in the hanging tree, the three of you part separate ways.

You don’t think much about it. Because if you did, you would start analysing, and probably you would stay.

Coriolanus is too busy in the barracks to even remember. But he can’t help to think about you and Lucy Gray in a balance, knowing he was lingering too much on your side.

And Lucy Gray understands that in the long term, you’ll either grow old seeing her and Coriolanus being together. Only if it didn’t turn out the other way, where Coriolanus ended up taking you and it was Lucy Gray who would have to bear it.

Either way. She would leave with the only two humans he could trust. Or so she believed.

…

Your boots are dusted. You stare at them, a bitten prune in your right hand a little knife in the other. The way he grabs her chin makes you feel uncomfortable… and jealous.

Coriolanus didn’t kill his old self. That was for sure. You have your own theories, but you refuse to add gasoline to the fire. Not when you have made it outside of District 12.

“Not the best time to throw allusions, Coryo,” you say walking past them, separating the couple. You hoped to have soothed the tension. But you knew Lucy Gray had decreased her trust in the boy.

“You’re right. Sorry…” Coriolanus accepts looking at Lucy Gray. Then to you and your silly headscarf, your long silk dress, and fishing dark jacket.

“We really needed her. Right?” Lucy Gray throws the words, making Coriolanus frown confused. And that’s when he questioned if the girl also had some feelings for you, other than being best friends. Because the way he was on the verge of smiling at the sight of you was the same way she was looking at you.

“She will prevent us from killing each other” he attempted to joke.

“Or be the reason why we kill each other,” Lucy Gray said. Coriolanus disliked the comment.

And so on, for the rest of the walk, it’s you making the air lighter. Your smiles made Coriolanus forget the offer of moving to District 2. Even the situation where his grandmother and Tigris were in. But Lucy Gray reminded him of his errors and his new upcoming country life. Your random comments about plants that are poisonous and others that work as medicine or aphrodisiacs make Lucy Gray blush and keep focused. Knowing that having you by her side was a good sign.

You lean to pick some violet flowers, and both Lucy Gray and Coriolanus look at each other to then look at you.

“Medicine, poisonous or…?” You giggle, noticing how Lucy Gray was avoiding saying the word.

“Saffron. An aphrodisiac, actually,” you answer, looking at her blush and Coriolanus’ little smirk.

“Some threads of this with warm milk or wine and…” Coriolanus can’t help but laugh briefly. You ignore the way he looks at you. The cheeky look he offered you and how you evidently looked away, blushed.

Lucy Gray caught a glimpse of your necklace. She stopped blushing as soon as she looked carefully. It was Coriolanus’ tag. Dangling between your breasts and shining under the last rays of the sun. It was getting cloudy. Likely, a humid rain was coming.

“I’ll take the lead from here.” Lucy Gray says, her tone a little more cold.

She starts walking away and Coriolanus takes the opportunity to help you stand up.

“You should take some…” when you understand what he meant, you punch his arm.

“You’re insane, Snow” he laughs and cynically goes to trace your face with one of the flowers.

“I think I’ve made my decision.” You turn to look at Lucy Gray, who’s even further then. Then back to the blonde guy with gorgeous blue ocean eyes.

You don’t want to hurt her. Lucy Gray deserved better. But you couldn’t deny that if the days kept passing, you would completely and blindly fall in love with Coriolanus Snow.

“We won’t do anything about it. Yet…” you say, sliding a little bunch of the violet saffron flowers inside your bag. Coriolanus shakes his head. There’s a big smile on his face, returning to walk before he jumps there to kiss you.

…

When the rain starts you decide to find the lake. Under the rain, the dark underwater conditions made it desirable to fish. Fish were more active and hopefully, you would be able to bring something to have for dinner that night. The cabin was very near. Coriolanus stayed there and Lucy Gray came to the lake with you. She was quiet, watching how your feet were underwater, and you sank a sharp branch constantly.

“I have one!” You happily yelled, watching how the poor animal squirmed.

When you leave it in a little bag with Lucy Gray, she stops you.

“Lucy Gray?”

“I swear I won’t ask again. But please be honest, y/n.” She starts and it makes you frown confused. You drop the branch, waiting for her question.

“Do you love him?” She finally asks.

You remain quiet. But you keep your word.

“I don’t know…”

She nods, looking at the damn tag on your neck. She should’ve known.

“That doesn’t mean I’ve been acting behind your back or that I will” you add. Because it’s true. None of your encounters with Coriolanus were set by you. It was he who always looked out for you.

“Not yet.” She spits, giving you a harsh look. You sigh, tilting your head, hands on your hips.

“Are we going to ruin everything for a man?”

“I don’t know. Are you?” She asks with a sarcastic smile.

“I won’t do this, Lucy Gray. And you shouldn’t either. Not when we’ve come this far already.” You say looking away from her, grabbing the branch, and walking away.

“Alright. I’m going back to the cabin. See you there?” She asks to surrender.

“Sure.” You hear her footsteps leaving. And you can finally breathe, your eyes water and you question everything.

The long days working with The Covey, helping them to make handicrafts to sell at the market. The nights laughing nonstop with Lucy Gray and giving her to drink when she shouldn’t, how she braided your hair and caressed you. All the good performances she gave and how good the celebrations were.

Then the days you were able to have long walks with Coriolanus, getting to know little but something about his life at the Capitol. The nights you sneaked at the barracks, and both spent hours drinking and saying silly things. The soft touches he started giving you. How he cared for you and always wanted you to be okay.

You realise they are the most important people in your life outside of your family. They are the strongest connections you’ve ever made. And you didn’t have the heart to ruin it or sacrifice it.

Those thoughts are long gone after you hear some shooting. You drop the branch again and you start running towards the cabin. You forget your boots and the fish. It’s the panic of knowing something bad has happened that reigns in your head. Some dry leaves hurt your bare feet but you don’t care.

You literally jump the stairs of the cabin. And once you open the door, you spot Coriolanus with the rifle in one hand. A knife on the other. That forbidden rifle.

You see some dry blood in his arm. An evident bite was there.

“What happened?” You rush to inspect his arm.

“Snakebite” but he’s fast enough to turn and start giving you pecks across the face. And once his lips brush your chin, you can’t take it anymore.

Neither him, he finally kisses you like he never ever did.

It’s desperate. While you kiss him back, many questions keep flooding your head. And you can’t fully concentrate on his lips. So you back away.

“Where’s Lucy Gray?” He remains quiet. Slowly, you look down. Until your eyes land on the rifle. You start walking backward, shaking your head. Tears forming again.

“No…” you whisper as he tries to get closer to you again. Coriolanus wants to scream and tell you everything is going to be okay. But he knows it’s not true. He sees how you’re starting to look shocked. And he realised how smart you were, how fast you connected the dots.

He makes you sit on the creaky chair of wood. He offers you a dark brown glass, where he pours some of the water. Slowly, you take the glass, hoping to calm yourself with some water.

Once you drink a sip, you see a crushed berry. Quickly you spit the water, throwing the glass as it shatters into the floor.

It was a Lily of the Valley, a poisonous berry.

“YOU POISONED ME!” You scream. He opens his eyes and enters in panic.

“No, y/n. It was an accident!” The urge to run increased. Probably what your dear Lucy Gray tried to do. It makes you finally cry.

That crushed berry was an accident. Coriolanus told Lucy Gray to wait for you, to prevent cooking anything that was poisonous from your collection.

“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?” He stops you, and as soon as he touches you, your reaction is violent. You keep squirming, trying to run away from him.

He drops the rifle, but the hand with the knife keeps dangerously brushing your temple. And Coriolanus wants to stop fighting so badly, worried that he could hurt you even more. Also, he panics as he knows the poison could be spreading.

He can’t be alone. You were his remaining hope.

“PLEASE STOP, Y/N!” But you don’t.

“YOU KILLED HER! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!” Suddenly both of you stop. You touch your face and your whole palm is covered in blood.

Another thing Coriolanus never meant to. The knife had made a deep cut, and the scarlet kept flowing from that side of your face, covering your silk dress with spots.

“It was an accident. Y/n…please”

An accident… he wanted to kill you.

You run. You run as fast as you can. Towards the lake, wherever. As long as you could be away from Coriolanus.

He runs too, he chases you. Making you feel like his prey. You try to ignore the fear that keeps building up. You ignore the blood threatening your vision from the left eye.

“STOP, Y/N!” Coriolanus screams.

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” But you don’t stop, you reach the old wooden platform at the lake. The rain splashing against the surface of the lake is loud, but not enough to silence your sobs of anger, fear, and pain.

Coriolanus also fears. He knows he’s a monster, but he didn't want to be one around you. Maybe it was his karma. He believed Lucy Gray placed his mother’s scarf on top of that snake. You believed he had purposely placed the crushed Lily of the Valley at the bottom of that glass.

He keeps running, you won’t go anywhere in that wood thing.

You turn to see him. And it destroys him. Your face and drenched dress. All covered in blood and rain. Your red and swollen eyes. He had broken you in less than twenty minutes.

And looking at his eyes was your ending. Because you slipped. Coriolanus saw how your weak body fell into the water and he ran faster.

But he didn’t jump. It was too late.

Soon he realised your body would never make it to the surface.

He cried, he screamed in that lake. He fell on his knees and cursed at the way things happened. He lost his head when Lucy Gray was gone, and he returned even more stressed as he thought you had also run away. But you came straight to his arms, hoping to see everyone was fine. And he just kept cursing, wishing he had given you a different glass.

Some minutes later, he goes back to the cabin. He takes the rifle carefully wrapped with a blanket and takes a raft.

As he lets the rifle sink into the lake, he wonders where your body had ended up. But he accepts it was probably better to let you rest peacefully underwater than disturb you.

In his head, he truly fell in love with you. Lucy Gray had been an enigma for most of the time, only to reveal her true nature in her final moments. And you, Coriolanus realised you were the real mystery.

Just like your death.

He took all the flowers you had collected and sprinkled the lake with them. His eyes watered once again. Thinking about what could’ve been. And after a minute of silence, he leaves. The lake, the cabin, the outsides of the districts.

With two remaining memories; Lucy Gray’s earring and a single saffron flower you promised to give it a try with him.

Coriolanus swears that he actually needed you. But you’re gone.

…

Ending up back in the Capitol makes Coriolanus feel like Lucy Gray’s death was worth it, actually. But yours makes him feel guilty. He could’ve asked you to come with him. To forget about everything that happened on the 12 and start a new life. With the Plinth fortune and Gaul’s help on his side, Coriolanus accepts the only missing piece is you.

The saffron flower rested between the pages of his journal, now dry. But the color was vivid as the day it blossomed.

Coriolanus is a new man. Who had let go of his past, but not the memory of you. He mourns your death the first week he comes back home. And he tells his grandmother that from now on he will only wear her white roses.

A symbol of peace, hope, and innocence. Which he had lost a long time ago. But it reminded him of you. Especially the hope, which was what you took away from him when you died.

So he accepts the invitation from the annoying childish girl Livia Cardew. The golden blonde was always a shy yet smiley girl in class. But Coriolanus never paid much attention to her. Until he learned Livia’s older cousin was a famous and respected politician. So he agreed to come with her to the Inauguration Day. President Ravinstill was too depressed and down after his son died at the hands of a rebel attack. So he had to retire. And Coriolanus knew it was a great opportunity to look out for contacts and form new comrades.

“You look amazing,” Tigris said, brushing her cousin’s shoulders, inspecting his dark blue suit.

“Maybe because you did this,” Coriolanus said, happy to see the young woman smiling again. After the bittersweet comment of saying he looked like his father, there had been a shift.

“With some help,” she says, admitting all the hard work was not from her hands. Now she had a little atelier where she had help and started new fashion trends at the Capitol.

“Even so, you designed it. Thank you, Tigris” he smiled at her.

“Are you still going with that girl?”

“Livia? Yes… Why?” He asked, looking at himself in the mirror.

“I don’t think she’s the one Coryo. She’s a child” Tigris admitted, arms crossed and avoiding looking at the man.

“She’s my age, Tigris.”

“Still… allow me to say this but, she doesn’t seem to be what you need” Coriolanus sighed. Of course, Livia Cardew wasn’t what he needed, she just had some contacts and a good reputation from her family. But they had nothing in common.

Coriolanus Snow needed you. An alleged district woman, who didn’t even know her last name or background. Just the sweet girl who seemed to be the remedy for all aches.

“I know she’s not the one” and Tigris knew there had been someone else than her cousin’s tribute. Something else happened. But she wouldn’t ask him.

“Listen, I’m just going with her to the inauguration, but this doesn’t mean I’ll take her for granted,” he says, pushing away his memories from you.

“Say goodnight to Grandma’am for me, please” Tigris nods, briefly smiling once again before kissing his cheek and wishing him good luck.

The celebration had been very ostentatious. With a lot of people cheering for the new president. He seemed young, with a mature beautiful wife. There was a rumour that he was District 4 governor and was Mr. Ravinstill's best friend. That said a lot about why District 4 was wealthier than District 2 or three compared to before.

Nonetheless, the Capitol’s citizens seemed to be embellished by this new president who promised a new start for everyone in Panem.

Soon after the Inauguration Ceremony, only the wealthiest and finest members of the Capitol were invited to continue the celebration in a mansion near the hills. The view was amazing and the remaining minutes of the sunset were gorgeous up there.

Coriolanus had barely tasted from his posca. After you, he started to pay more attention to poison. He saw some classmates, like Festus, Clemensia, Vypsania, Hilarius, etc. A side of him wants to get closer and say hi, but Livia appears beside him, eating a little pastry.

“Imagine living here and being able to see this view every morning, evening, and night.” She says. Coriolanus hates her purple dress and red lipstick. As he thought, Livia was ridiculously trying to look mature.

“It’s a great view.” He replies coldly. The city was finally looking brighter, modern, and illuminated.

He turned to see the profile of the girl and noticed she had some cream on her chin.

“You have some-“ Livia understands and quickly wipes it away, smiling at him. She was pretty, but not his type.

“Better?”

“Yes.” The crowd suddenly starts talking, capturing the couple’s attention. So when both Livia and Coriolanus turn towards the mansion, they see two peacekeepers opening the doors from the biggest balcony. And the new man who had the crown of president appeared, followed by his wife. And then what seemed to be his family.

The guests started a round of applause, looking up from the giant patio. Coriolanus finally took a little sip of his drink.

“Dear friends and honourable guests. It is my joy to say that the inauguration ceremony was a success. My family and I feel extremely blessed and thankful for all the support we have received” the man started his speech. Coriolanus was mentally taking notes. As that was the man he would literally have to beg to become the Capitol’s governor one day. And hopefully, then become president.

“This is going to be a period of change, evolution, and a new start for the history of Panem. I look forward to meeting all the involved staff and personnel to make this real” he sounded honest, yet, like a dangerous species that you had to be careful around.

“For now, I’d like to introduce my sweet and dedicated daughter, who shall not be judged by her young age. But to be admired for the position I’m giving her, as chief of staff.” it was able to be heard on the microphone. He said the name, but no one heard.

And the first thing Coriolanus saw between the lines of the railing were some weird heels and the layers of a tulle dress.

Then a satin top with some soft knitted sweater, with shiny buttons. A delicate golden necklace and some dark brick red lips.

Coriolanus Snow almost dropped his glass. His face went pale and Livia had to borrow the glass from him.

“Are you okay?” She asked worriedly. Coriolanus nodded, but he had an evident nausea forming.

“Y/n. Come here, darling…” the new president said with a smile. Putting an arm around his daughter, proud of showing her off.

The president’s daughter was you.

He couldn’t believe it. He saw your body drowning. You drank poison, and the cut on your temple. How could you have survived?

That didn’t matter. There you were with a shy smile. Innocence is long gone. Coriolanus only saw the mystery, the danger in your face.

Seeing you there, breathing, as much as he wanted to have you alive before, was going to curse his existence.

“A toast for everyone here. To begin this new era with the right feet!” Your father said, raising his glass.

Everyone did it then.

“For the president!” The guests cheered in unison.

Fireworks started, making everyone turn to the sky. Even Livia walked a little past Coriolanus, but he stood there looking at the balcony. Eyes set on you.

You spotted him. And it stopped your world.

He looked even more beautiful than he did in 12. Longer hair, perfect weight gained. Clean and elegant suit. Now you know everything about him. And it broke your heart. You had healed through the trauma of what happened in the lake. Nobody knew, besides you and him.

You hoped to keep it that way. But you had no compassion left for a man like Coriolanus Snow. Who killed your best friend, almost killed you, and loved you the wrong way.

You knew he would be scared to see you alive. He would end up begging on his knees at the slight error he committed. He would have many questions, that time would answer for him.

Your days of being a loyal and sweet girl were gone. Coriolanus had stripped you bare from any trace of trust, unconditional love, and innocence.

You stare at him, and he looks shocked. He looks so scared and… frail. So you greet him back with a smile, sipping at your glass one last time, before looking up at the fireworks.

He really thought that it was the end.

____________________________________

Minitaglist: @rockstarbfs @gracieroxzy @il0vebeingdelulu @coconut-dreamz @angelscrime @maryvibes @justacaliforniandreamer

part two? yey or nay?

[dronebiscuitbat]

Oil is Thicker Then Blood (Part 7)

The one thing Uzi did not mind about her transformation was her ability to fly alongside N during scavenging missions. He often had to slow down (thrusters will always be faster than manual flying), but it didn't seem to bother him in the least, especially when she was sharing her favorite songs with him over short-range.

And no, it didn't all consist of Nightcore thank you very much. She was sharing the ones she thought he would like.

Of course, N liked all of them, so she probably could blare Nightcore at full volume and he'd like it, but she was still keeping it mostly mainstream, mostly because he seemed to like singing lyrics if he knew them, which was fun!

Because he was good at it.

He nailed nearly every note so long as he was familiar with the song, and it was gorgeous, his voice smooth as butter and just high enough to reach the minor keys without sounding off.

And yes, it did make her core flutter like it was full of a million butterflies, but that was besides the point.

“Hang on, lemme give you this one.” She sent another over to him, her wings flapping above her as they both glided comfortably.

“How many do you have?!” N asked excitedly, although it was definitely in the sense that he was eager to hear all of them and not that he wanted her to stop.

“Years worth of emotional repression leads to years worth of saved angst, what can I say?” She replied, poking a little fun at herself, she pushed ahead as he opened the audio file, scanning the ground for any parts she needed.

This one was a little angry sounding, but the guitar was nice, and there was a woman singing in the background that he wished didn't sound so sad, but it was pretty, at the very least.

“Do you want me to just give you my playlist? I've kinda just been sending you singles from it this whole time.” She fell back in line with him, wings beating above her, wow, he never realized how strong they looked before.

“Yes!” He beamed, being ecstatic to listen to more, it was leagues better than anything he'd ever heard play at the manor, plus he felt as if he was learning quite a bit about her just through her saved songs.

He noted the complete lack of love songs, there were plenty of breakup songs, but it didn't seem that Uzi had either never felt that way about anyone or she may have just not liked the sappiness of them. He wasn't sure, he was kinda hoping for the latter, she deserved someone to make her happy, surely?

“Here. But we can't spend all night doing this, it not really what we're here for…” She sent him a massive folder that was going to take a bit to install, in the meantime. They both flew upwards, trying to spot things from higher up.

“No worries, what are we looking for?” He asked, just replaying the same songs he'd already listened to on repeat, just at a lower volume.

“A hardware store preferably, that explosion melted all my railguns internals… stupid J… pain in my ass even in death.” She added, sounding bitter. He didn't argue.

“Hmm, I think I saw one last night. I can send you the map data?” He offered, not noticing how closely they were flying, he could feel each beat of her wings. The urge to wrap his tail around her hit him suddenly. She wasn't in danger. What was this about?

“Sweet! Yes!” She gave him a thumbs up, and so he sent the map data to her, and she went silent looking it over intently.

And here he was admiring how she could intently focus of his map data while also flying near perfectly again, if he ever needed to revist a location he had to stop flying lest he hit something. Not her though, her mind was so lightening fast. Not just in this, but in everything.

Man his best freind was so cool. And pretty.

She… was pretty. But that was random.

“Yeah, you did pass one, this way!” She did pause in the air for a moment, but only to turn to him and make sure he was following, he nodded, letting her lead him.

Her tail swirled behind her as she kept herself aloft, it was graceful in it's own way, since she had to think more about consciously flying then he did, and so she ended up doing more spins and tricks in the air just by flying normally. It was almost like watching a dance, albeit a bat-like one.

“We're here.” He heard her shout before diving, and he followed without question, landing beside her with a metallic thud in contrast with her graceful perfect landing.

Okay, what the heck was going on with him today?

“Anything specific?” He asked, dusting the snow off himself before it melted and refroze to his chassis. Ignoring the random intrusive thoughts that seemed to be increasing in frequency and intensity.

“Small screws, wiring, oh! And capacitors! Lots and lots of capacitors.” He knew at least what two of those things were at what they looked like, so he nodded and followed her into the blasted out store after beating the snow out of his cap.

Her tail whipped around into a flashlight, pointing it at the rotten shelves and the icesicles hanging above them, a skeleton was at the counter, still in uniform, and still in the position of looking bored.

“Split up? I'll look for the capacitors, you get the screws and wiring?” She turned to him, with the absence of others she always seemed to smile, he gave her a thumbs up and beamed her one right back, before turning and wandering to the nearest shelf, leaving them both alone with their thoughts.

Uzi was already searching deep in the electronic section, trying to find capacitors that weren't completely broken or frozen, with a task at hand her mind was blessedly empty for once, enough that she was humming absent-mindedly whatever song had gotten trapped in her head.

She didn't sing, she didn't like her voice and thought it was too deep for most songs, but humming was fine, if it wasn't done in front of other people. Robo-God forbid someone hear her not being aggro for ten seconds. But here she was alone, and N was on the other side of the store, he couldn't hear her.

And even if he could, it was N. He wouldn't ever make fun of her for anything.

She smiled. At this point trying to deny her feelings was pointless, he made her feel so special, so wonderful. And he was so happy to spend any time with her, whether it be listening to her music or watching a movie or agreeing to visit a baby with her. He was always down, loving every second.

It rubbed off on her, she found herself smiling more, liking her life more, liking herself more. She was beginning to feel less like a freak and more like a person, all thanks to the lovable goofball she called her best freind.

And she wanted to call him more, connect with him more, but… she couldn't be certain he felt the same way. He was always so loving but he was like that with everyone, he cared, and that's just who he was.

So nothing he did proved he liked her like that. Romanticly. Never in a million years did she ever think she would be longing for someone, or even have a crush in the first place, but here she was, admitting to herself that… she was in love. Ew

But at the same time, the way he had been looking at her in the nursery, with a small smile on his face and his eyes digitally half-lidded. He looked… almost like he wanted to kiss her.

But that had to have been her imagination, he'd asked if she felt better right before, maybe he'd just been concerned.

With a victorious gasp she found a whole box of preserved capacitors and quickly stashed them in her bag before going off and trying to find the boy in question, core full of butterflies but also very very heavy.

N had finally finished downloading Uzi's monster of a playlist and was skimming through it while picking up his second box of screws, he doubted she needed this many, but being an overachiever never got him in trouble before.

He fingered the wiring he had in his pocket, feeling satisfied that he'd completed his task and yet still felt anything but.

He was… confused.

Uzi was his friend, his best friend. And yet the more he thought about her the lighter his core got, in a way that was new to him. Well no, that was it wasn't it? It wasn't new.

It was just attached to a new person.

But… he didn't have a crush on Uzi did he? He could form sentences just fine around her, he wasn't nervous or artificially sweaty. He just wanted to be close, to protect her. To be there when she needed him. That wasn't romantic. It was protective! Like all friends should be!

And yet he still felt unsatisfied, like he was missing something.

“Hey! Did you find what we needed?” He heard her before he saw her, bounding up to him with a crooked smirk, her tail twitching behind her and her wings folded against her back. She was cute…

He shook off his thoughts again.

“Yeah! Here!” He he presented the screws and the wire to her with a smile, his tail twitching as her hand grazed his as she took them, no that wasn't a spark you're imagining things.

“Thanks!” You ready to head back? It's going to be morning soon.” She asked, punching his shoulder playfully, a small laugh left his mouth.

“Yeah! And we can listen to music together on the way back!”

“Sure buddy.”

And with that they took off, commenting on songs and cracking jokes about the stupid ones, flying high to get home faster. With each minute he felt himself relax, whatever confusing mess his thoughts were causing right now didn't matter, they were laughing, and she was smiling. He would figure it out later.

“Is… is this song about a potato?” He asked slowly, causing her to snort before devolving into a fit of laughter.

“Y-yeah? I thought it was funny, and I rigged the teachers lounge to play it on repeat once.”

N didn't want to ask why, but he felt that it was a very Uzi thing to do.

“Hey, I might need to crash at your place tonight. Charge is low and I don't wanna pass out on the way home.” As she said that, a little low battery symbol appeared at the top right corner of her visor, showing she wasn't lying.

“Sleepover!” He shouted, making her smile again, he really liked her smile…

“Yeah, whatever.” She rolled her eyes, but her words lacked any sort of bite. There was a brief comfortable silence before;

“Oh… this one's kinda sad.” His face fell at little as he listened. An orchestral swell being out of place in the rest of the playlist.

I am tired of this dream….

Will it ever end for me?

“Sorry, I don't have a lot of happy ones that aren't also sarcastic…” She admitted sheepishly, she probably should find happier songs now that she was thinking about it. She felt happier now, what was the harm? So long that it was only her and N that would ever hear them.

I don't have the will to know…

Can you help me see?

“Oh! Duet!” He hummed happily, that fact alone seemingly making him feel better about it.

Let my body keep you warm…

Let my essence be your breeze.

Oh. This was a love song, and a rather longing one. He looked over Uzi's playlist, this one was added only recently. About three months ago, huh that was around when prom happened.

Can you hear me calling?

Please look out for meeee…

“N! Look!” Uzi shouted and he looked up, the gas giant was being eclipsed by Copper-9s barren moon, causing the entire night sky to be lit up in a burnt umber red. But he'd be lying if he said that was what caught his attention.

Can you set me free?

Will you take my soul away?

Uzi was silhouetted in the light perfectly, sending warm oranges and reds bouncing off her features like she was gazing at a roaring fire, she was hung in the air, snowflakes falling slowly around her, the light turning them to embers dancing in the air. She was smiling, her hands reaching out to touch one of the dancing flames.

Casting me in cold

Bury me in bones

Rest eternallyyyyyy…

He felt all the moisture in his mouth evaporate on the spot, and any further thought through his processors die. If flying wasn't an automatic process, he would have fallen from the sky in shock.

She looked beautiful.

Will you take me home?

Can we see the moon again?

Dancing in the dark

Till we fall apart

I can't end this dream...

Next ->

[eoieopda]

lacuna (knj)

lacuna (n): a blank space, a missing part

In his twenty-eight years, Kim Namjoon had made countless mistakes. Most of them were insignificant and could be shoved easily enough into the back corner of his mind. The worst of them were all tied for first place, keeping him up at night.

Loving you, losing you, and now – picking up the phone. 

Pairing: Ex!Kim Namjoon x Fem!Reader Type: One-Shot (Angst, Smut - 18+ or else.) Word Count: Like, 7K (?!) Content: ex-boyfriend au; exes to something?; literally so much angst; yearning; pov switches; oral sex (f receiving); unprotected sex; p in v penetration; cursing; texts from Yoongi. A/N: For reasons unknown, I decided to break my own heart today! The lyrics you'll see below are from "Sooner" by The Low Blow. There's also a reference to one of my favorite tv shows at the end - did you catch it? (1/9/23) The sequel, Redamancy, is finally here! (3/17/23) There is now a playlist 🥲

Sitting cross-legged on the rug, your weary, unfocused eyes stared somewhere in the vicinity of Min Yoongi. Shrouded all in black, you nearly assumed he was your sleep paralysis demon, hunched over his keyboard with his eyes narrowed in thought – but you hadn’t slept much at all lately. Not with your deadline looming overhead like the sword of Damocles. 

He relayed what was already looping through your brain. “It’s missing something.” 

You scrubbed your hands over your face, too burnt out to care if your foundation stayed where it was supposed to. “I know,” was all you said, though it wasn’t all you were thinking. Listening to this demo – this crushing song about love lost – you knew what was missing.

Or rather, who. 

Once again reading your mind, Yoongi spoke with a wary sigh. This time, he said the quiet part out loud. “Listen, I know that on a personal level, this is a terrible idea. But if you really want this track to ache –” 

“I’ll call him.” 

Yoongi turned to look at you over his shoulder. He, like you, hadn’t slept in over twenty-four hours; but his surprise still managed to crack through an otherwise impassive expression.

“You sure you want to be the one?” His frown was microscopic, but it was there and it bruised. “I have to hit him up, anyway, so I can handle this for you.” 

You’d never told him – or any of your friends, come to think of it – the details of your whatever it was with Namjoon. You couldn’t call it a breakup; that would necessitate a relationship. You couldn’t comfortably assign that word to this indescribable something.

But maybe that’s precisely why it hurt to breathe when you thought too hard about it. Maybe the thing that burned in your lungs was the fact that whatever it was wasn’t much of anything at all. 

The universally known narrative was that you met Kim Namjoon at a release party two years prior. After years of putting out extended plays, he was dropping his highly anticipated, full-length masterpiece.

That’s what your label called it; that’s what the press called it; but you couldn’t agree. That word wasn’t heavy enough – it didn’t give due credit to the pieces of himself he broke down and buried within those twelve tracks. You felt seen when you heard it. When you saw him, it was game over. 

As the story goes, you went home with him that night. While true, it was the tiniest fragment sitting sharp at the tip of an iceberg. The rest was an ill-equipped ship, sailing in slow-motion through the dark. 

He'd spent the entirety of his celebration focused on you. What you thought; what you wanted for yourself; what made that tipsy, uninhibited giggle come flying out of your chest. And then, holding his hand like it’d been tailor-made for yours, you followed his lead out of there while confused partygoers murmured in your wake. 

He fucked you like he knew you – on a cellular level – and he looked at you like you were all there was. You’d spent the entirety of the following day there, draped over him or nestled underneath him. You were never not touching in some way – in the little interludes of sleep; while cooking a breakfast too big for the two of you alone; on every surface of his apartment. 

He changed your life in those twenty-four hours, but not enough for it to stick. 

You’d spent as much time with him as you could in the year afterward, until your twin ambitions sent you both rocketing in other directions. Your various obligations never allowed you to be in the same place for long; and when they did, it was over too soon. No amount of time would ever feel like enough, but half a day, here and there, felt like a cosmic joke.

Like the universe was punishing you for wanting everything, all at once. 

Eventually, you came to a fork in the road. His career, though international, was rooted in Korea – home. Yours took you to Los Angeles, to a vastly different time zone, and a schedule that refused to make space. And you tried, but when it came down to choosing – idling together or racing forward alone – your respective dreams were so heavy that they tipped the scales.  

Neither of you could blame the other. After all, you’d both made the same decision. There was some small comfort in knowing that he understood you. That consolation couldn’t keep you warm at night when you’d instinctively reach out and find half of your bed still empty.

It would’ve been so much easier to live without him if there was some horrible betrayal to pin it all on, but he was as perfect when you lost him as he was when you found him. 

Shaky legs pushed you off the ground. Without meaning to, you groaned as your body returned to its regularly scheduled programming. Yoongi simply muttered, “Same,” as he made additional adjustments in his editing software.

You affectionally touched your knuckles to his shoulder as you passed by, though you quickly realized this gesture wasn’t made to comfort him. 

You shut the door softly behind you and headed up the hallway. Having kicked off and subsequently lost your shoes several hours ago, you padded in socked feet across the hardwood. The pattern – the various evolutions of Eevee – clashed so blatantly with the extravagance around you. Glancing down, you chuckled. At least some parts of you were still recognizable. 

The door to the stairwell creaked as you pushed it open and ducked inside. No longer camped out in the soundproof studio, you could hear the smattering of raindrops as they pummeled the exterior walls of the building. Somewhere between a drum roll and machine gun fire, you couldn’t figure out if the noise emphasized or relieved your anxiety. 

Gently, you lowered yourself down on a step halfway up the flight. As you stared down at your phone, your knee bounced of its own volition.

For once, you were thankful for the seventeen-hour time difference. This was the kind of call you needed to make at midnight, but one you didn’t want him receiving at midnight. It felt so much safer in daylight.

At least one of you had eyes on the sun. 

You’d deleted his number from your phone months ago because you thought it might help you let go. It didn’t. And to make matters worse, you still knew it by heart. As you typed it out easily, you wished this realization surprised you. You also wished that you’d catch him at a bad time, so you could simply leave a message. 

You’d never been lucky, though, had you?

Namjoon was half-asleep at a café table when the vibration of his phone against the wrought metal snapped him out of it. In his under-caffeinated daze, he couldn’t determine what that unbearable grinding noise was.

He could, however, see the way the elderly woman nearby was scowling at him. He furrowed his brows and blinked back at her; silently asking what the fuck her problem was. Just as silently, she pointed an angry, wrinkled finger to his tabletop. 

By the time his brain kicked into gear, he was too late. He picked up his now-quiet phone and nearly dropped it in an instant when he saw your name tied to a missed call.

He didn’t think twice before returning it – he should have – having figured there was only one way to know if he was truly hallucinating. You picked up immediately in a voice so you that he couldn’t have imagined it. He knew because he'd already tried.

“Hey.” 

People who didn’t know you often mistook the natural rasp of your voice for tiredness, but he did know you. You were beyond exhausted, more so than the last time he’d heard from you. Five months and twenty-one days ago.

This sounded like another all-nighter; like you got so consumed in creating that you couldn’t sleep until you finished. Remembering you like this opened a black hole in his chest – all this fondness with nowhere to go, collapsing in on itself, pulling.

What kind of masochist was he, voluntarily subjecting himself to this conversation? 

“Hey,” He croaked. Even his voice didn't know what to do. 

He heard shuffling on your end. You always pinned your phone between your right ear and shoulder to start — he immediately recognized the sound of your hair against the receiver when you switched it to your left side. Vanilla and honey flooded his nose despite the thousands of miles that separated him from the scent of your shampoo. 

There were a thousand questions spinning dizzy in his mind, but he couldn’t untangle them to spit one out. The longer you both remained quiet, the worse it got – and the worse he felt for his silence. Even without seeing you, he knew that your brows were knitting together. He knew that quiet made you feel too exposed. 

Namjoon cleared his throat to speak at the same moment you asked, “How are you?” His words echoed, a half-second from being uttered in unison. 

He prayed to any god that he’d stop feeling so nervous. There was no reason to be, not with you. You were his comfort zone, his safe space and – oh. Past tense.

Presently, you were – what, exactly? Could he call you an “ex” if you’d never had a title? It all felt too juvenile, hearing people whisper about his girlfriend. You were –fuck – You were home, and now his house was haunted.

A ghost. 

“I’ve been good,” he said quickly, planting a hollow smile on his face that wouldn’t have convinced you if you were there. Liar, liar, liar. “Busy. You sound –” 

“Awful?”

“– like you’ve been working all night.” 

He heard a sheepish chuckle and his clumsy, thudding heart went flying off into the void.

“That’s actually why I’m calling,” you admitted in a voice so tiny he nearly missed it, “And I wouldn’t be – I promise – if I could’ve bothered anyone else with this. This one, though… when I hear it in my head, I can’t imagine anyone –” 

“Say less.” 

It slipped out of him automatically. He couldn’t stop it. Now it was dangling there in dead air where he couldn’t reach it and shove it back down his throat. He must have said that to you a thousand times, giving you whatever you needed before you could even finish asking.

This was the first time he’d ever said it without punctuating it with a kiss to your forehead, though. And now, his equilibrium was off, like the staircase had one less step than he was expecting. 

When you finally broke the silence, he could’ve sworn he heard you sniffle, but he quickly kicked that thought back into the cage it escaped from. Your voice didn’t sound sad at all, so you couldn’t have been crying. Why would you be?

“I can have Yoongi send you what we have so far, lyrics too. If you’re interested, just let me know – verse, bridge, whatever you want.” 

“You’re with Yoongi?” 

It came out exactly as he hadn't intended – accusatory. It was no business of his who you spent time with, professionally or otherwise. And it didn’t even surprise him that Yoongi would stick around after the – whatever it was. All your shared friends stayed shared. His confusion was solely that Yoongi never mentioned working with you, let alone flying stateside to do so. 

Why hadn’t Yoongi said something? Did he assume Namjoon wouldn’t be interested in hearing about your project? Because he would - he kept up with all of your releases, even if it hurt. Was he scared that the mere mention of you would exacerbate the tailspin Namjoon was barely surviving?

Or was it something else? 

“Yeah, he got here a few days ago. I offered to send the vocals to him, but he said he wanted In-N-Out,” Your laugh, even under the weight of your sleepiness, still packed a punch. “Might be the longest trip anyone’s ever made for animal-style fries.” 

Namjoon felt like he was going to pass out, but for your sake, he tried to echo your laugh. “Sounds like he’s got his priorities in order, as usual.” 

That uncomfortable silence crawled back in and settled in the space between you. It never used to be like this. His mouth remained open as if his broken brain could think of a single thing to say. There were hours in every second that passed, but he didn’t hang up – and neither did you. 

“So, if I figure something out, I can shoot it back over –” 

You interrupted this time.

“No need,” You chirped. You must’ve sensed that his train of thought now consisted only of question marks because you dove right back in, “I’ll be in Seoul at the end of the month, so we can put all the pieces together then.” 

Please be speaking metaphorically. Please say – 

“I’ve gotta hop off now, but it was –” Your voice petered out at the end of your statement, and he didn’t know what to do within the pause.

What pleasantry would you settle on to end this conversation? Was it nice to hear from him, or did you also feel like you’d walked through the emotional equivalent of a car wash?  

It was heavy when you exhaled the amendment, hitting the ground with a thud that could’ve knocked him over.

It was torture, and it drop-kicked him into the abyss at full-speed. No light above, no hope below. A black hole that he kept selfishly refusing to close – all because he answered your call. 

“Thank you, Joonie.” 

Fuck. He was doomed.

You spent a shocking percentage of your life on international flights. It was a privilege – you knew it – to travel to the extent that you did, but it was so lonely.

If you were flying, there were two justifications. The first was the most common – touring. You’d touch down in cities all over the world, stay for a few hours, and then you’d leave again as soon as you could blink.

Your interactions were limited, either one-sided conversations from a stage; or facilitated entirely by a local translator. Never truly connecting, missed phone calls and texts sent too late to get a response. The same stale conversations with the crew that had been stuck with you for months. 

The second was less common, and somehow even lonelier – visiting a home that was no longer yours. 

It always went the same way. You’d touch down at the Incheon International Airport in your home country and feel just as foreign as the tourists bustling around you. You’d gather a suitcase’s worth of belongings and try not to think about the fact that they – and everything else you owned – once lived there, too. You’d hit customs and then, as a reward, snag yourself some boba from the café on your way out the door. 

In all those trips, you’d never once hailed a cab because Namjoon was always waiting. You’d hear him before you saw him with how loud he kept his car’s stereo, but when you did finally lay eyes on him, you’d light up like a sparkler. He’d shower you with affection – publicly, despite his usually private nature – and swap out the luggage in your hands for some thoughtful surprise. Flowers, usually, after painstaking deliberation over the meaning he wanted to convey. 

Now, you stood on the sidewalk with your empty hand in the air. 

Shortly after settling into your cab, you fell asleep. The person who would have gently scolded you for taking this risk wasn’t there to do so. Instead, you woke up stiff and disoriented to the sound of your driver honking his horn. You quickly learned that he wasn’t honking at traffic; he was honking at you with a scowl on his face. 

“Time to go! Wake up – your stop!” 

He was speaking in English, so it took you a few moments to determine whether you were dreaming. Impatient, he honked again.

Did he think you were a tourist? Was he right?

Your cheeks burned with embarrassment as you threw the door open and hurled yourself out. You ran to the trunk, snatched your suitcase, and tried not to remember that you didn't used to have to do this part yourself.

Yoongi had the foresight to give you a spare keycard before leaving California, so you were able to get into his building quickly – before you were honked at again. Spoken to in English again, like this place had never been home.

You, belonging nowhere and to no one, kept yourself together until the elevator doors gave you some semblance of shelter. 

Alone, alone, alone, you cried so hard that your shoulders shook. The mirrored walls around you showed infinite versions of you, all pitiful like you were still that little girl who’d gotten separated from her parents at an amusement park. It was incredible how you felt smaller in that elevator than you did as a child.

And fuck, did that embarrassment make you cry even harder. 

Eventually, those doors would have to re-open, and you’d have to let yourself into Yoongi’s unoccupied penthouse just to wait for his return. You were so sick of walking into empty apartments and hearing nothing but your own footsteps. No warmth, no laughter, just a black hole of your own creation. 

You chose this, you reminded yourself. This is what you wanted, wasn’t it? You were so busy chasing broader horizons, you didn't notice that the sun had disappeared. If you’d known – really, truly known – what the fall would be like, would you have taken that leap of faith? No, you think, but you did and there’s no jumping back into the airplane once you’ve dived out of it.

Ding. 

There was a post-it note waiting for you on the inside of Yoongi’s door that you would’ve missed if you hadn’t taken so much time to shut it behind you. His handwriting was shockingly neat for someone who was always in a rush. His note told you that he’d be home in two hours, that there was food for you in the refrigerator, and that you should help yourself to whatever you needed. 

The sinkhole in your stomach wasn’t created by hunger, so you pushed that down to the bottom of your to-do list and dragged your luggage to the guest bedroom down the hall.

Every inch of his place was undeniably Yoongi – monochromatic and edgy, but still so confusingly inviting. His guest room was similar in style, but with more personalized touches than most visitors tended to expect. Framed photos of friends, and the collaborators he was most proud to work with.

Your eyes eventually found one of you, beaming brightly. 

It hurt to look, but you couldn’t tear your gaze away. It was taken in a photobooth at Kim Seokjin’s wedding last spring. You were sandwiched on a small bench seat between Yoongi and Namjoon.

The former, like you, was captured in the middle of a laugh - smiling at the camera with all teeth, eyes crinkled at the edges but still sparkling. The latter wasn’t looking at the camera at all – just you, like you were all there was. 

Forcing yourself to look away, you returned the frame to its place on the vanity and kept moving. Your primary instinct was to hurl yourself into the plush bed and never leave it. But you felt stale after spending so much time traveling, and you didn’t want to collapse into those beautiful sheets until you’d scrubbed the day off you. 

Shuffling off to the bathroom, you finally remembered to take your phone off ‘airplane mode.’ All at once, the floodgates opened. The onslaught of texts, emails, and voicemails was so overwhelming that your phone froze.

When the flurry stopped, you scanned through your various inboxes for anything that might require an immediate response. Finding nothing urgent, you were about to set your phone down when you saw an email from Namjoon, addressing both you and Yoongi.

His verse, you realized as you opened it. 

I think I lost you sooner than I wanted to  And I know you can't say the same  But I can't hate you for doing what you've gotta do  Cause I'm just in bed sleeping through the pain  Do you see wasted potential when you look at me?  Of what we could be if it wasn't like this  I know you asked me not to try and change myself  But when I was with you, I felt fixed 

It took everything you had not to drop to your knees.

Namjoon was an incredible liar.

He didn’t utilize the skill often – in fact, he was usually too honest – but when he did, he could get himself out of any unwanted scenario.

In the distant past, he’d slip out of obligations made by his label to stay home in bed with you. It worked every single time. Instead of putting on some over-priced suit, wasting his breath swapping empty pleasantries with industry tools; he’d be hooking his arms around your quivering thighs, pinning you to his face as he fucked you with his tongue. 

In the present, he lied again. 

Yoongi asked, “How did it feel to hear from her again?” 

“To be honest,” Namjoon started, knowing full well that nothing he said next would be, “That shit’s behind me, man. I was surprised her number was still in my contacts, you know? She’s been a non-factor for a minute.” 

Yoongi rolled his eyes, “With the number of girls you’ve gone through in the meantime, I imagine it gets hard to keep track.” 

Hook, line, sinker. 

Namjoon offered a smirk and a shrug in response, which Yoongi accepted without further comment. The relief of being believed did nothing to cure the nausea swirling in Namjoon’s stomach, though - not just for the cruelty of his lie, but for the way he’d acted since you left and stayed gone.  

He learned early on that it would take more than fucking someone he didn't know to keep warm, but knowing better didn’t mean he did better. None of them – and there were many – could pull him from the limbo he found himself in without you. There was an emptiness gnawing at his insides that he couldn’t fill, and the more he tried, the more it tore at him.

The only thing he succeeded at was becoming someone he didn’t recognize –someone he didn’t even like. 

Yoongi pulled into his parking garage and turned to Namjoon, staking him through the heart with words alone. “Well, the non-factor is upstairs, so try to remember her name when you see her.” 

Namjoon chuckled, but it didn’t sound anywhere close to convincing. There was a flicker of doubt in Yoongi’s quickly flexed eyebrow, though he kept any questions he may have had to himself. Without a word, they clambered out of the car, and they stayed quiet until they stepped into the elevator. 

“How has she been?” Namjoon asked more quietly than he meant to. Like someone who’s scared of the answer - or worse, being asked why he’s asking. Quickly diverting further inquiry, he provided clarification Yoongi hadn’t sought. “Sounded tired as fuck on the phone.” 

Yoongi glanced at Namjoon before selecting the button marked with his floor number. “You know how she is,” He hummed. 

That one hurt. He knew how you were – past tense.

Except for that one phone call, he hadn’t heard your voice in months. He hadn’t seen you for even longer than that. Your number hadn’t changed, but for all he knew, everything else could have. All he had now was his memory’s pale imitation of you, always in sight but never within reach.

A ghost that disappeared into the walls before he could get too close. 

When the elevator door opened, Namjoon was fighting between running forward and running away. Incapable of doing either, it was Yoongi’s light punch on his bicep that prompted his feet to move. Namjoon trudged along after him until Yoongi stopped short with a groan. 

“The fuck?” Namjoon coughed as he collided with Yoongi’s back. “Don’t tell me you’re already winded, dude. I’m not giving your old ass a piggy-back ride.” 

The scowl he received could’ve scorched the Earth.  

“I forgot my fucking phone in the car.” Yoongi tossed his apartment key at Namjoon. It thudded against his unsuspecting chest only to be caught on the rebound.

Then, Yoongi pointed at the door. “Go play nice and figure out where we’re getting take-out from. I had a dream about bulgogi last night that was borderline sexual, so keep that in mind.” 

Namjoon’s face scrunched up. “I’ll be trying my best to keep it out, so thanks for that.”  

Yoongi had already turned around, waving a dismissive hand as he stalked off. 

As soon as Namjoon heard the elevator doors close, his phone chirped in his pocket and caught him off guard. He glanced down to find a text from Yoongi – who was, apparently, also a liar. 

Yoongi [18:19 PM]: fyi you always say “to be honest” when you’re about to say some bullshit Yoongi [18:19 PM]: "non-factor" my asssssss

Namjoon grimaced and shoved his phone back into his pocket before walking to Yoongi’s door with his heart in his throat.

Clearly, Yoongi wanted Najmoon to fix things with you. He’d crafted some false narrative to get himself out of there, to give Namjoon the time and space to do it. But there wasn’t a single fucking thing he could say to rebuild the bridge you’d both demolished together.

That is, if you even wanted him to try.

After unlocking the door, he froze. A full minute passed before his hand received his brain’s signal to turn the knob, and even then, his feet felt as if they were encased in concrete. If hearing your voice made him spiral, he was terrified of what the sight of you might do.

More than anything, he was scared to see how you looked at him – and he didn’t know what reaction he wanted. If you lit up the way you used to, it might kill him. If you had no reaction at all, it would definitely kill him. 

He would’ve stalled at that threshold all night if you didn’t appear in the hallway, straight ahead. You froze like a deer in headlights, one hand still on the door you’d exited from. Eyes wide, lips parted ever so slightly in surprise.

He didn’t notice the red rims around your eyes right away, but once he did, every cell in his body screamed at him to run to you, to hold you.

But he didn’t.

Touching you now only to lose you again tomorrow - well, that was a scab he couldn’t rip off again. There was only scar tissue where his heart used to be.

“Hey,” You smiled so sweetly when you saw him, but it didn’t reach your eyes. Those fucking eyes! He’d give up everything he had to erase the sadness swimming behind them, threatening to spill out. 

Why were you still so far away?

You glanced around him, noting Yoongi’s absence, but didn’t ask where he was. “I was thinking we could get something from that –” 

The longer he stared at you, the more impossible it became to keep his distance. He couldn’t stand on that doorstep with you over there, trying so hard to look like you hadn’t been crying – like you weren’t about to start again. 

Fuck it.

If he was so dead-set on re-breaking his own heart, he’d do it with you in his arms.

“Joonie, is everything oka–” 

No, nothing was. Nothing had been, not for – fuck, are his eyes getting misty? - a long time. Not since you walked out of his apartment for the last time, and he let you. He couldn’t make any of it okay, but with you there now, he didn’t give a fuck about where you were before. 

Your eyes were as big as the moon when he finally reached you, blinking your surprise up at him.

Did you really think he had any other option than to hold you? Did you have any idea how you looking at him like this - bare-faced, freshly-showered, vulnerable - demanded his immediate affection?

It felt like coming home, sliding his fingers through your still-damp hair. He could’ve fallen to pieces when the familiar scent of your shampoo – vanilla and honey – crashed over him, but he didn’t. His lips collided with yours, and for the first time in a fucking year, he felt whole.

You clung to him so desperately, you could’ve ripped a hole in his shirt. You couldn't care about that, though, because he kissed you and it was pure starlight. He kissed you hard, nicking your lip between his teeth until you opened your mouth against his.

You whimpered into him, drunk on the wet heat of his mouth, melting and falling and spinning and flying. You felt it all fall to the wayside, every second wasted without him, every text you didn’t send, every wrong turn that led you so far away. 

You didn't realize until you finally broke apart that the tears on your cheek weren’t exclusively yours. His gaze locked with yours, and all either of you could do was gasp for air - chests heaving, lips kissed swollen. If not for the arm around your back, pinning you against his chest, you would’ve floated away. But he had you, completely.  

Finally, you felt tethered. 

Your trembling hand settled on the side of his face. Fuck! That face. The warmth of his skin, the heights of his cheek bones, the gentle slope of his nose.

How many mornings did you wake up and miss it? How did you ever fall asleep without it nuzzled into the crook of your neck, without the whisper of warm breath on your skin?

You wanted to scream until the hurt left your chest, but you didn’t dare – not with that face so perfectly close to yours.  

He spoke first, “I’m so –” 

Your eyes followed your thumb as it swiped over his bottom lip, unearthing a quiver that burned you up inside. He was paralyzed by your touch. Enraptured. Leaving that clause hanging open in the air.

His eyes were wide with anticipation as he watched you, pupils dilating when you whispered. “Say less.” 

Faster than you could process, he lifted you off the ground as if you weighed nothing at all. Automatically, your legs locked behind his back; your lips re-captured his and his kiss never faltered as he carried you back into the guest room. Quickly and with a shocking display of control, he kicked the door closed without slamming it – or breaking it. 

Like so many times before, he laid you gently onto the mattress as if you were crafted from porcelain. And when he finally pulled away from you, you gazed up at him in awe.

This was one of the million reasons you couldn’t seem to let him go – the way his eyes softened when you were breathless underneath him, like you were the only thing in the universe worth looking at.

There were too many things to be said that neither of you could verbalize. You felt them all falling down around you like confetti, loose ends to be tied up later. He didn’t need to say a thing, so long as he kept looking at you like that. 

When his fingers landed at the hem of your shirt, you knew what came next. A dance you’d done a thousand times, you lifted your arms for him to pull it up and off. Still damp from your shower, the ends of your hair raised goosebumps as they chilled the bare skin of your back.  

He moved slowly and without breaking eye contact as he unbuttoned your jeans. Your zipper followed, then your jeans and underwear in tandem. The denim dragged so deliciously against your thighs as he slipped them down, down, down. As he tugged them off your ankles, you discarded your bra and tossed it aside. You were entirely bare and shivering with anticipation when his gaze found you again.

His shirt soon joined yours on the floor. Kneeling between your legs, his bare chest burned against your own as he kissed you for the third time. So many more were needed to make up for lost time, but you could feel how much of himself he poured into the kisses he’d credited you with so far. The taste of his mouth on yours was indescribably intoxicating after so much time apart. 

With you sufficiently distracted, the hands that cupped your face began to migrate. You felt so small under his touch, reduced to putty in the warm expanse of his palms. His face lowered too, freeing your mouth to moan as he placed open-mouthed kisses down the length of your neck.

Involuntarily, you gasped when his fingers pinched at one of your nipples. The curve of his smile impressed upon your throat as he suckled at the sensitive skin he found there, leaving clouds of indigo behind. 

As he marked you, he rolled and tweaked your nipples in turn. Your eyes fluttered shut and you keened while your head crashed back against the pillows, “That mouth – feels s-so fucking good.” Your fingers carded through his hair, fingernails scratching lightly against his scalp; his silence broke with a shuddered moan. 

“S’all I want, baby,” He hummed as his lips trailed down from your neck and beyond your collarbone. “To make you feel good.”  

You were trembling when he claimed one of your nipples with his mouth. Then he had the audacity to look up at you from under his lashes when he released it with a lewd pop, causing your back to arch against his chest with a gasp. There was a rumble from deep within him when your grip on his hair tightened, and the sound alone made you gush. 

“To taste you,” His tongue left a wet stripe above your navel as he continued his descent, large hands dipping beneath you to squeeze the doughy flesh of your ass. Shit - you would simply never recover from this. “To devour you until you melt in my mouth.” 

Another sharp tug at his hair, another guttural moan breaking free from your chest.

How often had you dreamed of this in your time apart? How many times did you try to remember how it felt when that timbre whispered sins against your naked body? Fuck. With those words alone, he had you on the brink. 

You whined when he pulled away from you; but it quickly turned into a gasp when he hooked his arms around your thighs and dragged you with him towards the end of the bed. Now kneeling on the floor, he ducked below your knees until they rested over the tops of his shoulders. 

Face so near to your aching core, he growled, and you felt it. “I missed this pussy –” He placed a wet kiss on your inner thigh, prompting you to clench them reflexively. “I missed the way your thighs squeeze around me while you fuck yourself against my tongue.” 

Shivering, slack-jawed, and stupid, you grabbed fistfuls of the comforter below you. He was so painfully close to your cunt and still so fucking far from you. You knew he could see how badly you craved him - you’d beg for his mouth if you had to. 

Of course, you didn’t have to - you never did.

Seconds before your impatience could drive you fully insane, he was on you, tongue flat against your cunt, dragging up against your slit. When the tip of his tongue flicked over your clit, you cried out with a buck of your hips. His grip on you tightened, pinning you flush against him as he teased you. 

“That it’s, baby. Good girl.” 

It’s a miracle either one of you could form words with how relentlessly he licked, nipped, and suckled on your throbbing cunt. All you could do was babble in response to his praise – until the tip of his tongue penetrated your weeping hole, and you screamed. 

A flurry of curse words spilled from your lips; his name sprinkled in between the obscenities. Fuck, you needed more. More, more, more. You extended your arm and reclaimed your grasp on his locks. Once you did, you began to grind yourself against his tongue until your abdominal muscles burned - you hadn’t utilized them to this extent since the last time.

His hand squeezed your thigh, goading you, encouraging you to use him the way you needed to. The pressure of his tongue increased with your pace. You had no control over the sounds you made; the breathless moans escaped you before you could think of trapping them. The coil was tightening, burning red-hot in the pit of your belly. 

So good, so good, so g – 

“Fuck!” 

One by one, your muscles tensed in quick succession until your body shook violently in his grip. Toes curling, back arching, head crashing backwards into the pillows, mewling. 

When you finally gathered the strength to re-open your bleary eyes, there were spots dotting the edges of your vision – and then there was Namjoon, fuck-drunk between your weakened knees, with a mixture of his saliva and your orgasm shining on his chin. 

Lustful eyes locked squarely on your flushed face; his tongue slid from between his swollen lips to attend to the mess you’d made of him. His panting rivaled yours, but unlike you, he was still capable of speech.

“I will never – ever – get tired of watching you come,” he sighed before wiping his mouth against the back of his hand, “You’re so fucking beautiful like this.” 

As he climbed back on top of you, he placed a chaste kiss on your sweaty forehead. “So vulnerable –” Then the tip of your nose. “So vocal –” Then, too briefly, your lips. “Perfect.” 

“Joon,” You murmured against his lips. His mouth curved into a smile at the nickname, which you used almost exclusively to win arguments, or to persuade him to do something. It worked every time. 

He nudged your nose with the tip of his as he tried to conceal his laugh. “Baby?” 

The fond look in his eyes was quickly covered by fluttering eyelids as your fingertips whispered down over his chest. They snapped open and bored into you as your fingers slid over the waistband of his joggers, tracing a feather-light trail over the bulge below. You felt his cock twitch autonomously against the warmth of your palm. 

“Shit,” He hissed through gritted teeth as you squeezed him. Eyes drifting shut once again; he rolled his hips to exacerbate the friction. His neck tensed, head thrown back, when you finally dipped under the elastic and took him into your hand. Skin to skin, burning up.

The next moan from his fawning mouth was something you hadn’t heard in his voice for months – your name. “I need you. Now.” 

In the few moments he pulled away to remove his pants, a chill crept in and settled where the weight of his body had just been.

There it is again, you thought, the feeling of having him and losing him.

When this night was over and he was gone from you, would he stay that way? Should you have gone this far, knowing nothing would be different in the daylight? 

You were blinking fast when he reclaimed the space above you. Something flickered in his eye as he assessed the look on your face, but he didn’t ask. Instead, he leaned down and kissed you so gently that you could’ve imagined it – but so completely that your brain could never have fabricated it. Not successfully, anyway.

You’d already tried. 

Breaking apart once more, he reached down and stroked himself slowly. His eyes never left yours. You both held your breath as he slid into you, millimeter by millimeter, reminding your body – after all this time – how to take him. All of him, to the hilt, until you could finally exhale.

Stretched to accommodate his width, so fucking full, you saw a way out of the nothing that had you trapped like quicksand. It was him, always. Your safe haven.

Neither of you could speak once he began rolling his hips against you. The quiet was electrified by heavy breaths and whimpers. The wet heat of your cunt squelched as your walls enveloped him, just as unwilling to let him go as the rest of you.

Over and over, he grinded into you, dragging his length across your most sensitive places; hips swiveling slightly to the side as he pushed and pulled himself through you, the way he knew you liked it. 

Open mouth beside his ear, you keened and sighed, wordlessly informing him that you wouldn’t last much longer. He was perfectly attuned to your subconscious movements, and he responded to each of them without hesitation.

He’d never need to be reminded that the fingernails digging into his biceps meant faster, and the upward tilt of your jaw meant deeper. That when your eyebrows rose above your closed lids, you were seconds away from your release. 

He remembered exactly how to fuck you through your orgasm when it came – shallow, staccato thrusts that unraveled you further as you writhed against the sheets. The spot on your neck to nip at like some secret switch, praise dripping hot in your ear like honey.

“Such a good girl, squeezing me like this,” He panted, “Taking me so well – so fucking perfect for me, angel.” 

As soon as you crashed down through the atmosphere, his movements threatened to ricochet you right back into space. You keened helplessly with your half-numbed fingers gripping any part of him where they could find purchase.

“I c-can't stop -” You mewled, “How am I s-still c-coming?” 

His response didn’t come in the form of words. His lips collided with yours hard enough to clink teeth as he drove himself deeper and deeper and deeper. Sloppy, kiss-bitten lips laying claim; relentless in their mutual need for closeness. Your walls were still fluttering around him – was this your second orgasm or your third? - when he moaned into your mouth.

Every part of him tensed above, around, and inside you as the flood of his release filled every crevice of your cunt. 

Breathing ragged, his head fell into the crook of your shoulder. Considerate as ever, he tried so hard to keep his full weight off you, but his exhaustion undermined his efforts. You didn’t mind at all – you’d re-build your home there, staying forever between his body and that borrowed bed if you could. 

But you couldn’t, could you? If you felt empty before, how could you feel whole again after this? His name etched itself into your ribcage, and now your body would never re-acclimate to his absence.

Why did you do this to yourself? 

You squeezed your eyes shut tight when you felt tears prickling in their corners.  

Everything you felt for him – over the course of two years – came crashing down over you. You buried your face into his shoulder and tried your best to keep your crying to yourself.

You’d never get his scent off your body now. 

He could sense your shaking; it forced his heavy lids open. 

“I don’t know what to do with it,” you sniffled, silently begging yourself to stop. You felt yourself shrinking under his eye. It would only be a matter of time before you disappeared entirely.

His tone dripped with concern, serving only to deepen that infernal ache in the pit of your stomach. “With what?”  

“All the love I have for you. I don’t –” You sobbed, “I don’t know where to put it now.” 

His breath caught in his throat as if you’d punched him straight in the chest. If you listened hard enough, you might’ve heard his heart break. You could certainly feel it in the way he tensed in your arms.

When he moved off you, you feared the worst – that your incessant crying overflowed the bathtub, and your admission was the toaster thrown recklessly inside. But unlike the last time, he didn’t leave - and neither did you.

The mattress shifted as he claimed the space at your side - where he should have been all this time. Strong arms enveloped you as he turned to face you, and even though he held you, he couldn’t stop you from shattering.

For a while, he let you. Squeezed you hard, stroked your hair the way he used to, let you cry out all the poison that filled the spaces in the cavern of your chest.

And when you could finally breathe again, he kissed your forehead. “I’ll trade you for it.” 

(1/8/23): Check out the sequel, Redamancy, here.

[thefallennightmare]

Just Pretend-three

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: i hate how this took me all day to write. I just want to keep writing this story!

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98

I sat in the front lounge area of our bus on the couch with my legs crossed, laptop in my lap, as I scrolled through the Spotify playlist I finished creating. It was quiet up here, the rest of the guys of Hollow Souls were scattered throughout; Malcolm was out for a run around the block, Chase was hanging on Bad Omens bus, and Trey was still asleep in his bunk.

It was only 9:30 in the morning but I knew he would sleep most of the day away especially since it was our day off. We were already at the next city, parked in the venues lot, and since we didn't have to worry about sound check or setting up yet, we all did our own things.

Me? I had been debating all morning if I should create this playlist but in the end figured it was the best thing to do. I was touring with Bad Omens after all, shouldn't I be familiar with their songs?

For the next while I let Noah's voice blast through my headphones as I danced in my seat as Limits played, banged my head as Hedonist screamed in my ear, and felt my heart fall out of my ass when his soft voice of If I'm There buried deep in my soul. The lyric struck me right away and the pure raw emotion that oozed out of Noah made my heart skip a beat, almost as if I was about to pass out.

Fuck what Trey thinks, I need to watch these guys perform tomorrow night.

Malcolm came bounding up the steps, sweat dripping from his auburn hair that was falling around his bare shoulders in waves, and gave me a smile.

"Okay two things," I scrunched up my nose as he sat next to me. "How the fuck do you run so early in the morning, with your hair down no less? And you fucking stink."

"Oh, listening to our tour buddies I see," he ignored my observations by nodding to my laptop screen.

I shrugged. "I was the only one of us that wasn't familiar with them and now I'm pissed it took me so long to discover them. They're amazing."

Malcolm agreed with a nod. "Noah's voice has grown so much from their first album, it's actually impressive. It would be sick if we got him on a song for our next album."

"Trey would immediately shut that down. He hates collab's between artists," I closed my laptop and set it on the small kitchen table next to me.

Malcolm sighed while running a hand through his long locks. "We really should talk about-."

"No," I sliced my eyes into him. "I'm not having this conversation with you when he's a few feet away from us. We can talk about it later when he's not around."

"Alright," he nodded. "I'm going to hop in the shower. Chase still with the Bad Omens guys?"

"I think so," I answered, watching as he stood and made his way to the bathroom.

"Cool. You should get ready, we're going to hang with them for the day. Wear something cute!" Malcolm called over his shoulder before the bathroom door shut.

I blinked slowly at the space in front of me for a few moments before staring down at my outfit; black leggings and an oversized shirt. Which would have been fine for a day of lounging on the bus but going out in public called for an outfit change.

And that Noah will be there has nothing to do with it.

Ignoring the voices in my brain, I trekked over towards my bunk where I had a suitcase already open, clothes folded neatly into small piles and rummaged through before deciding on a pair of biker shorts and one of our merch shirts I rolled up the bottom of to show off part of my stomach. It was a warm day in Wisconsin so I wanted to be comfortable.

As I slipped on my docs and finished french braiding my hair, Malcolm emerged from the bathroom also dressed and ready to go.

He nodded in approval. "Much better."

I snorted and patted his chest while walking past him. "Glad you think so."

"I think you should change your shirt though."

"What's wrong with my shirt?" I asked suddenly self conscious about the way I looked. "If it's showing too much, I can change-."

"Fuck," Malcolm sighed. "Trey's warped your mind so bad. No, Y/N. You look great, I'm just saying it would be better if you wore this."

He tossed me a different shirt, one I caught with ease, and when I held it in front of me I gave him a raised brow.

"Really?"

"Meet you at the OMENS bus. I'll text Trey to let him know where we're at," Malcolm pounding his knuckles with mine before leaving the bus.

With my bottom lip caught between my teeth, I decided not to dwell too much on the decision of wearing the shirt. That's all it was, a shirt. If he got upset about it, he can fuck right off. Once changed in the new shirt, I realized it was a bit long since it clearly was Malcoms who was atleast a foot taller than me. The shirt rested about mid thigh and covered most of my biker shorts. I let out a few deep breaths to center and calm myself, because the idea of hanging out with the guys without Trey made me nervous.

Yes that was it, not because Noah was going to be there. Ever since we hung out the other day, all I could think about was his tattoos or the way he instilled so much confidence in me as he spoke deeply about my lyrics. No one has ever had an in-depth conversation about my lyrics before since they all thought Trey was the one that wrote our songs. The only thing Trey was good for was his screams, which I had to admit were faltering. Our energy and connection on stage wasn't the same anymore but thankfully, none of the fans cared to notice. As long as Trey dared them a glance, they were happy.

So with the confidence from my conversation with Noah the other day, I walked out into the warm morning sun, bare legs and arms on display for everyone to see. While my right leg had no tattoos, every inch of skin was covered in ink. The bright rays burned my eyes, so I slipped on my sunglasses while throwing my purse over my shoulder and made my way towards Bad Omen's bus, hearing a round of laughter emanating from the back of it.

As soon as I walked up, the conversations continued for all but one. Noah, who was talking to someone I hadn't recognised, turned his attention to me and even through his own sunglasses, I felt the burning gaze from him as he took in every inch of my body. I shrank into myself as others started staring at me but Noah's was the most intense, and I ran my sweaty palms along my thighs.

"What?" I asked.

"Nice shirt," Folio smirked. "We haven't seen that design in a while. Almost forgot it was a Bad Omens design."

I fiddled with the bottom of it and shrugged. "If we can move on from my outfit choice, that'd be great."

The voices in my mind were screaming at me to run back to my bus to change and my feet turned when Noah's voice stopped me.

"You look good."

Three words.

Those three words ignited the blaze across my skin and all I could do was nod because I was so nervous to say something, afraid I would make a fool of myself. Noah also looked good. No scratch that, he looked fucking beautiful with his hair flowing freely across his shoulders and the white shirt he wore hugged his chest and arms in all the right places. The bottom half of his tattoos were on display and I couldn't help myself as I stared at them, something I didn't realize Noah was doing the same to me.

"Hey, I'm Matt," the man who was talking with Noah smiled.

"Y/N," I gave him a small wave.

"So," Chase spoke. "There's this really awesome zoo just around the block. Figured it be cool to check out?"

We all nodded in agreement and began walking in our large group; three of Hollow Souls, four Bad Omens, and two of their crew members. Matt, their manager, and Bryan, their photographer who had a camera slung around his neck. I walked in steps with Chase on one side of me and Nick on the other. Once again, Nick was looking down at the tattoo on my leg.

"You love to analyze the designs, huh?" I joked.

He shrugged. "I can't help it. Does the design on your leg have a meaning?"

It was a large tattoo of several Greek Gods sitting on top of Mount Olympus; Athena, Artemis, Ares, and Posiedon. My favorites.

"Uh, I'm a huge Greek Mythology nerd and these are some of my favorite Gods," I gave a sheepish smile.

Malcolm turned to face us as he began walking backwards. "Don't get her started on Zeus."

I pointed a finger at him. "Everyone thinks he's the most all mighty God when in fact, he was a douche! One of the worst Gods. Makes me so angry everyone puts him on a high pedestal."

Chase chuckled. "Way to go, Malcolm."

Noah walked ahead of me a few feet and as I continued to talk with Nick, I could see out of the corner of my eye when he would turn to face me; almost making sure I was still here. Soon the entrance to the zoo stood in front of us and as I pulled out my wallet to pay, I realized it was missing.

"What the fuck?" I murmured while riffling through my purse.

"Something wrong?"

Gazing up through my sunglasses, I saw Noah looking at me with concern. He pocketed his glasses so I could see the browns of his eyes sparkle in the sunlight.

"No. Well yea," I sighed letting my purse fall to my side. "I must have left my wallet on the bus. You guys ahead. I'll see you back at the venue."

It all happened so fast; Noah pulling out his own wallet, asking for two tickets, and handing the person behind the counter the correct amount of change.

"Noah," I scolded. "You didn't have to do that!"

"Come on. They're waiting for us," Noah said with an extended arm in front of me.

The rest of the group hung back just inside the entrance as they watched us with their own wondering eyes.

I didn't move however, only kept a stern gaze on Noah through my glasses. "I had no problem going back to the bus."

He scoffed while dropping his arm. "Right, to sit with Trey while the rest of us have fun? How is that fair?"

I pursed my lips, unsure how to respond, so instead with a long sigh, I walked past him towards Chase who had a large smirk on his face.

"What?" I asked, slightly irritated.

He motioned to Noah behind me. "He was checking out your ass."

I never whirled around so damn fast before in my life and one of my braids slapped me in the face as I looked at Noah, who in fact was starting intently at me. When our gazes locked, he quickly averted his over to Bryan.

For the next while, I walked with Chase as we stopped every few minutes to check out the animals at the zoo. Halfway through our visit, I stopped to grab a pretzel with cheese thanks to Chase who paid. When we then stopped in front of a large sign showcasing the map, I gasped excitedly while pointing to it.

"They have wolves!" I turned on my heels towards everyone.

"So dogs?" Folio teased with a smirk.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "How dare you! They're not just dogs. Well, I guess they are since they descend from wolves. But-." My ramblings fell off my lips when I saw Noah staring at me.

"What? Do I have something on my face?" I wiped at my face, afraid there was dried cheese on it.

"No," Noah's voice was low. "I just like how you look when you're so passionate about something. It's cute."

Turning my face away from him so he couldn't see the way I blushed, I nibbled on my bottom lip. "We don't have to go see them."

"To the dogs-I mean wolves!" Folio exclaimed with a hand up in the air.

I all but ran to the encloser that was only a few feet away from where we were and as we approached the high chain-link fence, I bent low so I could peer through hoping to see them. With what I knew about wolves I wouldn't catch a glimpse because of the heat today. It was almost like this every time I tried to see wolves at any zoo.

Everyone stood back, a quiet hum of their conversations background noise, until with a frown I rose to my feet not realizing Noah was standing behind me. I felt his warm body heat envelope around me and I peered over my shoulder to him.

"I could stay here for hours just waiting," I admitted with a smile.

"We can stay," Noah suggested.

"No," I shook my head while turning to face him. "We can go. I don't want to make the others hang around for nothing."

His long lashes brushed across his cheek as he blinked slowly, eyes never once leaving my face. My heart was beating so fast at how close we were and I wanted to take a step back, I really did, but there was this invisible force that kept us tied together. It pulled my hand away from my purse strap to brush some hair out of his face but before the action took place, Malcolm's loud voice hollered over to us, breaking the trance we were in.

"If you two are done staring at each other, Jolly wants to go see the tigers!"

Retreating away from Noah, I scurried over towards the group of the guys as we made our way over to the next large encloser, Noah trailing slowly behind. While Jolly interacted with the tigers, I hung off to the side lost in my own thoughts. Often I would check my phone to see if Trey texted me but nothing. I was gone for hours already, wouldn't he have noticed we were gone?

Maybe he was still asleep?

I tried to think of scenarios of why he wouldn't text or call instead of thinking of how close Noah and I got back at the wolves. It was wrong of me to think of another man like that. It was also wrong for me to keep stealing glances his way all day or wondering what his skin on mine would feel like.

Almost in a trance of my own thoughts, I followed the group when we reached the petting zoo area of the zoo where you could feed deers.

"Oh, sick!" Nick exclaimed.

I, on the other hand, did not think so.

"Do you want too?" Noah asked me.

"I'll watch. You can't trust these guys, they'll try to eat your shirt." I said.

I watched him bend to his knees as a smaller deer came up to him, licking up the food from his open hand. Noah smiled brightly as the deer nibbled the cracker from between his fingers and I couldn't stop my smile as it pulled at my lips. It was one of those smiles where the skin next to your eyes crinkle and cheeks hurt from how hard your smiling.

His smile could make you forget all the bad in your life. It brought so much light to the darkness that filled my soul of the last few months. My stomach burned with something unknown and it scared me that one person could cause this intense feeling; who I wasn't even dating. Trey never once made me feel this way or even tried too. All Noah had to do was smile at me and I was on my knees in a puddle mess of desire.

"Are you going to keep staring at me or help?" He smirked up at me.

Embarrassed at getting caught, I reluctantly bent down next to him and took a cracker he extended towards me. "I swear if this little shit bites my finger, I'm going to kick your ass."

Noah bumped his shoulder with mine. "It's a deal."

"Okay, I'll admit this is kind of cool," I mused while scratching a deer on its nose.

When he didn't say anything, I turned my head slightly towards Noah but sucked in a breath when I realized how close we were. His warm breath fanned over my lips as his eyes tracked every movement of my tongue made as I licked my suddenly dry lips. We were so close I was afraid that if I leaned forward slightly, our lips would brush across each other. I could smell the lemonade he drank earlier as the scent tickled my nostrils.

Noah swallowed thickly, and a noise came out of the back of his throat as he went to say something but was cut off by someone's screams. For the second time that afternoon, we were broken out of our trance like state to see Nick and Malcolm running away from a group of deers that were chasing them.

"Uh," my voice stammered. "I should probably go help him."

Quickly rising to my feet, I left Noah behind to go save my idiot friend from a couple of deers that just wanted something to eat.

NOAH

A yawn fell past my lips as I stretched out my long limbs before leaning up against the cool metal of our tour bus, the cool night air wrapping around the small group of us. We all returned from the zoo a little while ago and while Bryan and Matt went to the crew bus and Malcom and Chase went back to theirs, I was standing with Folio and Y/N, as she pulled out some cash that she grabbed from her bus.

"Please take the money, Noah. I feel terrible that you spent your money on me," she extended the two twenty-dollar bills towards me while she clutched the small wolf stuffed animal underneath her arm.

Something I surprised her with on the way out of the zoo.

Her eyes sparkled as she eyed the gift cart when we walked past it. "Would it be stupid for a grown woman to want a stuffed animal?"

She asked to Malcolm, who merely shrugged in response. So while she wasn't looking, I bought a wolf one for her.

I didn't miss the way her lips parted in surprise when I gave it to her. Or the way she let out a long shaky breath before muttering to herself.

"He doesn't even buy me anything."

She didn't have to say his name; I knew who she was talking about.

"I'm not taking your money," I shook my head.

Y/N groaned and tried to give the money to Folio who raised his hands as if the money was cursed. "I'm not taking it either, Y/N. When Noah wants something, there's no changing his mind. He wanted to pay for you today, accept it."

"Fine," she stuffed the money into her pocket. "But I owe you back with something, Noah."

Folio was fast to speak before I could even argue. "Why don't you come hang out on the bus with us for a bit?"

Y/N's body went rigid, eyes glancing over to her bus so fast I almost missed it.

"It'll be fun. Even for a bit," Folio smiled before walking up the stairs of the bus, leaving her and I alone.

Alone.

Just the two of us.

For the first time all day.

I rubbed the back of my neck, suddenly very nervous. With the others around, I could act cool around her but now under her bright eyes, my knee buckled.

"It might be fun if you hang out with me-us," I quickly corrected myself hoping she didn't notice. "We could play Mario cart?"

I stared down sheepishly at my feet, trying to find the courage to ask a girl to hang out with me. Not that fucking hard so why did my voice waver every time I tried to talk to her.

"We could play monopoly but that wouldn’t end well. Jolly thinks he’s the bomb at games and we spend most of the time kicking his ass.”

Another quick glance to her bus as she shifted on her feet something I realized she was doing because she was nervous Trey would come out any moment. According to Chase, Trey didn't call or text her all day to see where she was or at least check in on her.

"Hey," my fingers brushed along the inside of her wrist, getting her to finally look at me instead of fear to her bus. The spark that shocked through us nearly had me rear my hand back from the intensity. "You don't have to go back, you know."

Her brows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

My heart pounded as I forced the words out of my mouth before I second guessed myself. "Stay till morning? Knowing Trey, he's probably going to be nursing a hangover in the morning so he won't even notice you're not there."

"Where would I sleep?" Her voice was hushed, barley above a whisper.

With me.

"We have extra bunks," I said.

She blinked for a long moment, letting my words process in her brain. She was highly debating my offer but in the end; she shook her head.

"It's been a long day and I should head back. I'm sure Trey is wondering where I am."

The disappointment was evident on my face and I had to bit my tongue not to lash out with a comment about how much Trey did in fact not care.

"Sure," I nodded. "Let me walk you back to your bus then?"

Clutching the wolf stuffed animal closer to her chest, she nodded with a smile playing at her lips. It wasn't a long walk so my mind was running rampant with something to say to keep the last little of this perfect day alive.

"I don't think I mentioned how much I like you in my shirt."

Shit, I didn't mean that.

"Our shirt. The band's shirt," I quickly recovered when I noticed the playful gleam in her eyes.

We came to a stop in front of the door of her bus, the lights off inside which meant that either no one was in there or they were asleep.

Her gaze darted to the windows back to me. "I had a really fun day today, Noah. Thank you."

My fingers itched with the need to brush a strand of hair that came loose from her braid but I resisted.

"Anytime, angel."

Fuck.

She raised a brow at me, a reddish tint creeping from her cheeks to the tops of her ears. "Oh, angel, huh?"

"Sorry, it kind of slipped out," I rubbed my chin nervously. "If you don't like it, I can-."

"No, I like it!" She rushed out. "A lot, actually."

That was an ego boost that I desperately needed. So, with a wink, I began walking backwards to my bus calling out in the dark night air. "Good because it stays, angel!"

[trentsixtysix]

Request: a late night drive with T and ”the color violet” is playing and y/n & Trent had just had an argument and he’s driving very fast- you can write it how you want it :)

The Color Violet

WARNINGS: Dangerous driving, Toxic/Manipulator Trent, Trent being mean ASF, mentions of sex

I am obsessed with this song + this request! I'm not the proudest of this but sorry it took so long + I apologise if this isn't your cup of tea <3 This also reminds me of that one Nate + Cassie scene

Word Count: 2.0k

Angst

'You just can't help yourself can you?' He reprimanded, taking a brief moment to glance at you whilst you tried to keep your patience in the passenger seat, letting him continue.

You were both on the way back from a friend's house, where all of your other friends were gathered, and for some reason Trent just couldn't stop annoying you.

It started off innocently; making a comment about how one of your friends looked nice in the outfit she was wearing; and you knew what game he was playing, he wouldn't stop until you were a jealous mess in front of them all.

You knew why - the pair of you hadn't made love in weeks due to him being away for the World Cup, and on top of that you’d been ignoring him lately as he only called you once during - it was his fault yet here you were facing the wrath of it. As much as you tried your best to ignore them, your blood was boiling when you saw how handsy they were with each other; helping each other around, him reaching the top cabinet for her whilst she obnoxiously complained of how short she was, and the way he purposely laughed at everything she said.

You thought you were past the point of childish behaviours like this, and what first started off as a joke had seriously hurt you at the end of the night, which is when you decided to take matters into your own hands.

Two can play at this game. You thought, deciding this was the perfect chance to try the same thing with one of your male friends before you all left; refusing to look away from his lips and smirking like an idiot as he pecked your cheek, playfully dancing with him maybe a little too sensually as music played, but no one knew about you and Trent, which meant he had to sit back and witness it without saying a word.

You knew Trent had seen it all, he was watching you both from the corner of his eyes, you could tell by the look on his face he was fuming, and the wink you gave him did not help the situation, causing Trent to grab you by your arm and drag you to the car.

'Get off of me!' You shrieked, internally giggling as you were glad he was as worked up as he had made you before.

'Shut your mouth Y/n, you're so drunk.' He complained, which was true as you probably wouldn't have acted that way sober, regardless, he was the sober one who did the same thing before.

'Why are you mad? Weren't you enjoying it in there with your girlfriend?' You mocked, anger returning to you as you rolled your eyes and turned the other way.

'You just can't help yourself can you?' He reprimanded, taking a brief moment to glance at you whilst you tried to keep your patience in the passenger seat, letting him continue.

Your phone had automatically connected, playing the last few songs from your playlist as you both bickered over them.

'So it's okay for you to do it?' You challenged.

'Do what? Be nice to a friend?' He said, laughing in disbelief.

'You knew exactly what you were doing Trent.'

'And you didn't? Could see the tent in that prick's pants from a mile away.'

'Nice to know at least someone is getting hard for me.' You slammed, jabbing at the fact you hadn't been touched since he left for the World Cup, the same World Cup you didn't go and visit him for - and in the one day he'd been back you still hadn't spoken properly with each other.

'Are you serious? You know how busy I am Y/n, don't be a fucking brat.'

'And I'm not busy? I always make time for us, for you.' You explained, starting to become a little annoyed at his dismissal.

'What us? You're the one who said we're nothing, you're the only girl I fuck and you know that so why does it matter?' He asked, a little brutally.

'I could ask you the same thing, why do you care who I dance with?' You wondered.

'Because you are mine regardless. It doesn't matter what I do because these girls don't matter to me, but I can't have another guy touch you as long as whatever this is, is going on.' He explained, the vein in his forehead becoming more prominent, and all you could do was chuckle at the audacity he had.

'You're a joke, I'm not yours, never have been and never will. You can ask her to sleep with you next time, or to cry to about your problems because I won't do it anymore.' You promised, eyes becoming teary now.

'It was just a bit of fun, you don't have to cry all the time.' He said.

'Wonder why I'm crying all the time? Tell me Trent, who's making me cry all the time?' You questioned, watching as he fell silent, not remorseful just annoyance on his face as he began to speed up, suddenly hitting you with a jolt as you were startled with the change of speed.

'Trent calm down.' You advised, placing your hand on his thigh as you watched the speedometer gradually get higher and higher, but instead of listening he turned the music all the way up, drowning you out.

'Okay that's enough now.' You added, feeling an uncomfortable pit form in your stomach, clutching the grab handle above you as you unknowingly dug your fingers into Trent's leg.

He simply stared away from the empty, isolated motorway and instead placed his eyes on you, watching you emotionless for a few moments as your fear was presumably extremely visible.

His face didn't give anything away about what was going through his mind, you weren't sure what he was thinking and were shocked he had you in this scenario in the first place; he always promised you he'd keep you safe, but lately everything he'd been saying had been turning out to be lies, and you knew at that moment this was out of your control, shutting your eyes as the car somehow managed to go faster wishing he’d look at the road in front of him - all whilst you were praying for the journey to end.

The only thing you could hear was the sound of cars flying past from the other side, your wheels gliding along the road and the song in the background on full blast; the song the two of you would listen to when he'd pick you up to stay the night, the one on your late night drives to McDonalds, and the song that would just instantly remind you guys of each other - The Color Violet.

'Trent please stop.' You begged, panic audible in your voice as he continued to ignore you, not even slowing down slightly even when you saw cars begin to surround you again, fearing the worst.

'Trent?!' You shouted, even though you knew how stubborn he was, and knew he wouldn't listen to you.

You'd pissed him off and you didn't even do anything; the two of you weren't even dating, and you'd stupidly been involved with him for the past year, hopeful of him to make it official with you but every time you thought you were close, you'd find out he'd flown out a new instagram model or took another girl home after a night out.

Despite the endless amounts of false hope he gave you, you couldn't find yourself to let him go, and he eventually swore off sex with anyone other than you, even if you weren't in a relationship. He wanted you without the responsibilities and connection that dating you would include, and although this upset you, you stayed quiet.

'Say something, just please slow down baby.' You urged, watching as you slimly missed the car in front of you as he swerved into another lane, seriously not knowing what the outcome would be as you began to whimper in fear slightly.

Your eyes were shut for the remainder of the journey, and you felt at peace when you were brought back to a normal speed, opening your eyes slightly to see familiar roads surrounding you, aware you were approaching Trent's home now.

He parked up on his drive, staying still for a moment as you both sat in silence, your heart still beating incredibly fast, which he knew as he could hear you trying to regulate your breathing.

You didn't want to stay with him tonight, if his actions weren't enough, his driving had scared you completely, but you weren't about to ask him to drop you off and spend any more time with him in a vehicle.

'Why are you looking at me like that?' He asked, genuinely concerned as you weren't sure what was going through his head the past 15 minutes.

'Come on, you don't actually think I would hurt you?' He asked, getting closer to you, caught off guard when you turned your head away from him.

'Y/n. I knew what I was doing, there's no way I'd actually let anything happen to you.' He explained, watching as you just left and walked up to his door, aware he would have to eventually follow you and unlock it for you.

You walked straight past him as he let you both in, trudging upstairs to the familiar home, the home which was practically yours at this point, and locked yourself in his bathroom to take your makeup off and got dressed into your sleeping clothes, taking a bit of time to decide what to do now, unsure if you’d stay the night.

When you returned he was in bed already, laying awake and springing up when he heard your footsteps.

'Can we talk?' He asked, noticing you were about to leave the room.

'Where are you going?' He pushed, whilst you ignored him.

'My uber is waiting.' You explained, calmly.

'Y/n, don't be like that.' He laughed, patronising you almost.

'I can't do this anymore, this whole night just put into perspective how exhausting this is Trent.' You sighed.

'This is exhausting for you?' He repeated, almost offended.

'I deserve someone that won't hide me, won't need to make me jealous. You didn't even let me cheer you on during the World Cup for God's sake.' You laughed, tired.

'You're serious? You agreed and said there was no need, that you wanted to be private.' He argued.

'Only because you said that first, you don't even have the guts to make me your girlfriend.'

'So that's what this is about? You're mad you're not my girlfriend when that was never the deal.' He confirmed, looking rather pissed off at you now.

'Just know that I've always cared about you, and that this was more than a hookup to me.' You told.

'Me too Y/n, I've told you things I've never told anyone before, opened up to you about things I wouldn't even admit to myself, you've always been special to me, why can’t you see that?’ He revealed, eyes welling up as you both stared at each other.

‘I do see that, and I love you-.’

‘And I love you back?!’ He emphasised, annoyed at you now.

‘I know you do, but you don’t let yourself show it, see how easy it is for you to argue with me right now?’ You told him, remaining calm.

‘If a label is what you're after then I can’t help you.' 'I'm sorry.' He said, missing your entire point but at the moment you were too over it to even argue with him; it was like talking to a brick wall.

'I better go then.' You sniffled, making your way down to the taxi, and the further you walked away from him the more you struggled to control your tears, eventually letting it all out as you got inside the car, not even attempting to compose yourself infront of the driver.

You took a deep breath, looking out of the car window and up to one of the lit windows of his house, seeing him sat there watching you, eyebrows furrowed and a tear falling from his eye as he watched you leave, before finally closing his curtains aggressively.

That was the last time you'd seen him, and you brought your emotions to a halt as you recognised the song playing in the car at this time of night, eyes closing in exhaustion as you just couldn't seem to escape The Color Violet.

[irishmammonagenda]

Hello! I hope your requests are open 🧚‍♀️

Can i ask, what brothers' reaction would be on MC who sings something like MSI (you know smth like "son of a bitch! God's like me!") or just alternative rock/punk in general?

Answer only if you're okay with that❤️

Have a great day🏃‍♂️

hihi‼️(i love the amount of emojis u use i can feel ur personality through the screen teehee)

i absoluetley can‼️‼️ also tysm for the new music to listen to (im kind of new to alt rock and punk i only really used to listen to MCR lmao😭)

anyway this was fun to write

grma for the ask <3

Obey Me Brothers React to MC Being a Wee Emo.

DISCLAIMER: emo is used as a word because where im from emo is used to describe nearly any type of alternative fashion bc we're all dumb over here app, also im 2% sure pop punk/poprock is emo music bc i think thats what mcr is, so we're going w/ it ig, the only thing ik abt music is that bars 13-20 in the dambusters themetune has fanfare so if i get any terms wrong lmk 😔✊

WARNINGS: There's a slight slight hint of drinks being spiked in Beel's one. nothing ever happens its just him keeping an eye on your drink at a concert just in case.

LUCIFER

He hears music blasting in the music room in the House of Lamentation.

At first he just sighs, it sounds like the type of music Belphie would listen to when trying to plan out another Anti-Lucifer League. The teenage angst probably helped fuel the seventh born’s desire and motivation to prank him.

He sneaks into the Music room. Technically he just walked in quietly, but you still jumped when you saw him.

"L-Lucifer!! Hiya!!" You say awkwardly, not looking the first born in they eyes. "What's up?" He blinks slowly at you, fighting the urge to place a gloved hand on the bridge of his nose and pinch it in disappointment (and/or second hand embarrassment) "I'm not going to say anything. Just keep it down, MC." He sighs, normally he'd have lectured you. But it reminded him too much of a wolf-cut, guyliner filled past that for the sake of his pride, he did not want to remember.

He wasn't a stranger to musical genres, the man collects records for fuck's sake.

The drums and guitars he can normally get behind. Especially with catchy rhythms.

The lyrics?....they're normally a hit or miss. It really depends on the song.

'God likes me' (MSI) 'Hail Mary, Forgive Me' (PTV) Religious references just kind of ruin some songs for him.

Lucifer spends his time collecting cursed records, but your music taste is a special kind of cursed MC.

Although, he is strangely supportive in his own way.

"MC, Lord Diavolo has gifted me some tickets to concert [small devildom band] is putting on, I thought you would enjoy it."

(Lucifer bought the tickets himself.)

MAMMON

Haha, Emo!

"Yer a wee emo so ye are, MC"

It's not exactly his style of music (the man listens to Kneecap ffs)

BUT!!! He wants to share things with you dammit! Let him listen to your stupid emo music with you!!! He's your first man!!!

He does, however learn how to play guitar so he can play some simple chords while you sing horrible improvised lyrics with horrible improvised chords.

You don't have the heart to tell him that acoustic guitars aren't normally used in Punk/Rock music.

The sound of horribly improvised chord progressions ring out in your bedroom as you and your first man stand back to back, horrible matching messy eyeliner on both of yours and Mammon's eyes as you hold a hairbrush to your mouth and improvise lyrics. That is, if you can even get them out of your mouth before laughing. "Blood in my body! Because I'm aliveeee!!!" You sing off key while Mammon strums the guitar. "Love in my Bugatti! Because The Great Mammon can drive!" You laugh. Mammon whistles while missing out on the fingering of a chord and then pretending it didn't happen.

LEVIATHAN

The first thought in this man's mind is karaoke.

He sends you a playlist of Rocky kinda anime openings that you should totally listen to.

He's the least shocked and weirded out, (not that the others are weirded out)

He really likes your singing voice. It doesn't matter if you're a horrible singer, its you so it makes him happy.

You guys could do a duet? If it wasn't too much for you to sing with a stinky smelly otaku like him :(

"Levi-" You sigh, looking at the Levi shaped lump of seaweed in his aquiriam, the demon's tail twitches through the pile of aquatic plant, showing that he's listening. "Levi... Of course I'd love to do Karaoke with you...You didn't give me a chance to answer before jumping into the tank! C'mon!" It takes Levi a few more minutes before he feels ready to leave his seaweed pile, his face is completely red, but there's a small smile on his face as you set up the karaoke machine.

SATAN

Satan enjoys your music taste.

He likes most if not all human world music because music is so important to culture and he loves learning about human world culture.

What he doesn't like however, is people dropping his name in lyrics for edginess smh.

No MC, no one in Je T'aime is his bitch. Please stop asking.

He also takes you to gigs! Because why not!

The blond haired demon sat in the bar, earning a few looks from the people surrounding them. He stuck out like a sore thumb in his jumper and jeans and the book in his hands in comparision to black denim and leather, chains and sub-cultural clothes that everyone else was wearing. Satan payed it no mind as you came back with the drinks, all decked out in clothing matching the rest of the people in the venue in style. "Hope you weren't waiting long....the lines were long!" Satan takes a drink from your hand and sips it, giving a soft smile, "Not at all."

ASMODEUS

The music is a hit and miss tbh, he prefers the more pop punk kind of thing, leaning more into pop than anything else.

He likes paramore though!

Loves the clothes associated with the genres and subcultures of the music! Adopts some of it into his own style!

(He alters it heavily, but some designs are inspired by the subcultures)

He could be your adorable gorgeous boyfriend and you could be the wee emo gremlin partner!

The opposites attract will look so cute on his Devilgram.

But he geniunely supports you and your interests, he designs and makes clothes for you in the style associated with your music taste.

He even makes you merch of your favourite bands and albums inspired into clothes.

He also does your makeup before you go out to concerts or gigs

Your his emo after all.

You squirm as Asmo runs his fingers along your flushed skin, he laughs as you jerk away. "It's just a brush, it wont hurt you darling!" He laughs, putting more black eyeshadow onto the makeup brush and applying it---or atleast trying to---to your eyelids, biting back teasing comments as you jerk away. You were ticklish god dammit! It wasn't like you were meaning to! It was a natural reflex!

BEELZEBUB

He likes it.

but not because he enjoys the music persay. Don't get him wrong he can listen to it and enjoy it but he wouldn't normally seek it out.

He likes it because you and Belphie like it, and the style reminds him of the both of you.

In terms of rock music he likes the more slow ballady types. Belphie normally listens to them when he has trouble falling asleep.

Very supportive.

If you're ever in the Mosh Pit in a concert, Beel will go with you, you're just so tiny and people can push you about! (You're tiny to him. So yes MC, his point still stands.)

Taking that back, if you're at a concert, Beel's probably with you. Unless you're with another brother, Even then, Beel's probably going to come.

Bro is like your own bodyguard.

Reports to Lucifer when at concerts and makes sure you're not taking any illegal substances, you don't know what's in them MC!

He makes sure nothing is put in your drink either.

He just wants to keep you safe :(

Beel had been staring at the cup in your hands back and forth for a while now, you smile and offer it up to him. "Want a sip, Beelie? You've been staring at my drink a lot" You practically shout over the music. You weren't in the mosh pit, and though you stood a good distance away, the music was still loud. Beel shakes his head, pointing to his pint and smiling his closed eye smile, "No thanks, MC. I'm just making sure you're staying hydrated and don't need refills." He says truthfully, though that truth isn't whole. You grin, "Aww...that's so sweet!" Turning your attention away from him and back to the stage, Beel wraps an arm around your waist. Eyes alert and wary when someone so much as walked past, or a crowd member got a little too close while dancing. He was overprotective and cautious. But you deserved to be safe.

BELPHEGOR

Give him back his albums what the actual fuck.

Look just because he takes your life it doesn't mean you get to take his music taste.

Wowwww. Petty.

Fine, you can borrow his limited edition special cut vinyls.

What? Lucifer's not the only one with a record collection.

He did not get this idea from Lucifer, No you Liar.

He did.

Belphie listens to rock ballads to get to sleep when he has trouble sleeping and when he wants to.

Sometimes when you nap together he puts some on.

It's kind of like a white noise machine.

Will go to concerts with you and Beel, but has to have slept for atleast 2 whole days leading up to it so people don't think he's passed out in the crowd.

Mention any similarites about his little music vinyl collections to Lucifer's cursed record selections he will not let you borrow any for atleast 3 days.

Long before Eve bit the apple and the brother's wings turnt black, a small boy with indigo hair wakes up from a nap, pouty lips wobbling when he realises his twin is nowhere to be found. Belphie sniffles, but doesn't break into tears. He's a big boy now! Big boys don't cry when they miss their twins! Beel was probably out on a walk with Michael and Lilith in her stroller! He'd come back! But still, Belphie's bottom lip trembled, eyes watering, the little boy didn't like being seperated from his twin! He was about to cry when he heard loud music coming from a room down the hall. More curious than anything, Belphie gets off of his bed, and (taking his teddy bear with him) walks down the hall following the sound. Though his walk was more of a waddle with his tiny legs. He'd never heard anything like it before! When Beel got back he could tell him about his discovery! Soon enough he reaches a slightly cracked open door and the music is super loud here. This must be it! Waddling into the room, Belphie could see a figure laying spread eagle on one of the beds. Half of the room decorated in colour with one bed and the half of the room with the person laying on the bed was almost completely in black with a bunch of posters on the walls. Most importantly, on the floor lay a box with a spinny thing spinning that seemed to be playing the sounds! Belphie held his teddy in one hand and lifted up the thing that was running across the big black circle. Immediately the sound stopped and the figure sat up, with layered dark shoulder length hair, layered dark black white and red clothes, and enough eyeliner to paint the colourful bright half of the room pitch black. A teen Lucifer looks down at Belphie with a sour expression, upset his mope session had been interrupted. "What are you doing here?" He asks the small indigo-haired angel. Belphie looks up at him with wide, sparkling eyes before pointing to the record player. "Why's it makin' sound? There's no choir in there...." Lucifer's eyes soften. His mope session about meeting the demon prince, not hating him, and finding him pretty like the human he met down in the human world could wait. "It's a record player, Belphs." The teenager's too emo, the end is nigh, everything sucks, too cool for love and affection persona drops and reveals his softie interior. Lucifer picks up his younger brother and places him on his bed as he takes out the record that was playing in the record player and putting on one that would be much less intimidating for someone as young as Belphie. He sits back onto the bed and the small boy cuddles up to his big brother, ever the affectionate child. As the record plays on Belphie grins up at Lucifer, revealling one missing front tooth. He had lost them early, shortly after Beel's tooth had fallen out. Lucifer grinned too, suppressing a chuckle at how Beel hadn't even realised his tooth was wobbly until he bit into his breakfast and found his tooth lodged into the food. "Luci! I likes this music!" "Do you?" "Mhm!" Lucifer grins, petting his youngest brother's head. "I'll tell you what. For your birthday I'll get you your very own record player and lend you some vinyls, we can even go to the human world and pick some new ones out. I'll show you how to play them when you have them, okay?" "Okay! Thank you Luci!" After a while, the songs change from high energy into ballads, Belphie's eyes grow heavier, as do his big brother's. Belphie curled up into the elder's side, abandoning his teddy bear for grabbing at the fabric of Lucifer's shirt with tiny grubby hands as he nodded off. Lucifer made sure to try not to move, in result of the slow rock ballad music and staying completely still so not to jostle and wake up his youngest brother who would 100% get cranky if woken. Slowly, Lucifer's eyes start to close, and he falls into a soft slumber as well.

And hey, if Michael returned from his walk, and after leaving Beel and Lilith into a play room went to check in on Lucifer and saw that sight; and then proceeded to grin and take multiple photos of said sight from multiple angles to use as blackmail on his little emo twin brother Lucikins on a later occassion, then that was Michael’s business and Michael’s business alone. And Lucifer's business when Michael didn't want to do the dishes when it was his night to do them, of course.

But if you ask, Belphie'll tell you that visiting the human world is what got him interested in that type of music.

Because he's a stinky smelly little liar and should be locked up in an attic.

On a side note he bullies you for being 'emo' :(

Bro is such a hypocrite.

But to be geniune, Belphie loves that he can share his music with you. He's happy you can bond over this with him.

Not that he'd ever outright tell you.

But you can tell in the way he gives you albums and vinyls as gifts, and makes you little playlists of ballads to sleep to. (He's gotten you into the habit smh.)

[tsuunara]

   " lets crash course learn twice choreography ! "

SPECIAL GUESTS : chuuya nakahara , osamu dazai , atsushi nakajima !

 ABOUT ORDER : forcing teaching bsd men twice choreography! how into it are they? do they hate it or enjoy it ?

 CONTENTS :  might be ooc !! , profanity in chuuya's part , dazai shenanigans , kunikida appears in dazai's part !! , poor atsushi is struggling to keep up :( , kyouka appears in atsushi's part !! .

 SERVER'S NOTES : stan twice!!! this was a warm up to prepare for my soon chuuya angst fic... sorry for the wait :( btw here is the playlist of all the songs for each character! i'll make a pt 2 with nikolai and fyodor . :) this was super fun to write lol

   chuuya nakahara ! The Feels

chuuya has seen you practice the choreography a couple of times . he doesn't really mind when the music blasts and just lets it slide because he loves you so much ! chuuya doesn't know much about kpop but he's heard a couple in your playlists , and hears you play the same ones over and over again ... not like he doesn't mind though . despite it not being his actual music taste, he secretly enjoys listening to it sometimes and it's his guilty pleasure . when he sees you dancing all silly , he can't help but smile in awe . he thinks it's so funny and cute seeing you put your all into it !!

" YOU HAVE STOLEN MY HEART OH YEAHH NEVER GONNA LET IT GO OH OH NO NEVER IT LET IT GO OH OH OH- "

" well uh shit... am i interrupting something here ? "

" lightning straight to my heart oh yeaAAAH WHAT THE FUCK CHUUYA- "

oh, but when you encourage him to dance with you ? who is he to say no with that stupid smile of yours ? no matter how silly it is , he WILL do it .

" ...so uh- "

" ...crash course twice choreography . "

" ...what ? "

" you know what , chuu ? you're in perfect timing . you should really join me !! come on , i'll teach you twice choreography ! "

" huh ?? woah woAH WOAH- WAIT HOLD ON NOW- "

although he is a bit hesitant , he always gives in . and with no regrets after whatsoever !!! he's a very quick learner too with lots of flexibility !

" one , two , three , four , five , six , seven , eight ! one , two , three and four , five and six and seven , eight ! good ! just make sure to bend your knees a bit more... and then... stretch them ! "

" uhuh, okay... like this ? my god- this dance is kinda hard... how'd ya even manage this ? "

" not to worry , chuu ! just like that !! YOU DID IT !! "

"holy fucking shit . I DID IT . "

overall , 9/10 is super into it . always exaggerates his moves but at least it shows he's having fun !! bonus points for being a new little distraction he can do at work ! has definitely had a couple of his colleagues walk in on him . whoopsies !

" you have stolen my heart oh yeah... never let it go oh oh no , never gonna let it go , oh , oh , oh... "

" uh... sir ? the... documents... "

" lightning straight to my heart oh yeaa- GOD WHAT THE FUCK ?! oh . it's you . the documents ? yeah yeah , uh... go put them... over there . "

" ......sir- "

" no . if it's about that , then i don't want to hear it . "

   osamu dazai ! FANCY

dazai's favorite pastime ? learning twice choreography . and what better ? with you !! he's had his ass dragged into your little dance classes sooo many times... (not like he's complaining though !) he knows somewhat about kpop , he likes listening to it with you (and for shits and giggles . ) also loves to see you dance to the songs yourself !! always tries to copy you so much so he ends up distracting you because it's funny , causing you to mess up the entire choreography :( when he hears the music play , that's when he knows it's time to crash course learn twice choreography !

" ...'samu ! "

" yes lovely ? "

" do you know what time it is ? "

" hmm..... four-thirty . "

" stupid , not the actual time ! c'moooonnnn you knowww thissss... "

" well color me clueless . "

" 'samu.... "

" i'm kidding! hmm... oh , don't tell... it's that time , isn't it ?! "

" you're so right... IT'S TIME TO CRASH COURSE LEARN TWICE CHOREOGRAPHY ! "

a little slower learning the choreography (because mf can't take it seriously sometimes) , but once he gets the hang of it you bet fucker WILL be hitting those moves whenever has the chance .

" it seems another job well done to us for solving the mystery , bella ! oh , OH , OHH !! i feel a song coming ... LET'S HIT IT , [name] !!! ohhh yes GET IT !! "

of course being dazai, you can't have a dance lesson with a little chaos in between ! but that's what makes it even more fun !

" one, two, three and four... no 'samu, that's not how do it ! "

" hehehe. fancyyyy youuu ooh-ooh-ooh- "

" DAZAI THE TABLE-?! "

" ouchieeee.... !!! bellaaaa~ help me out hereeeee... my hips huuurrrrrt !!!! "

" oh my god... "

overrall , 9/10 very chaotic but totally fun experience ! he enjoys it far too much for his own liking . he does a few freestyle moves of his own to " jazz up " the dance takes your dance lessons to HEART . period . kunikida always scolds him at work :P

" OI DAZAI . this isn't some dance class . get back to work !! "

" whaaaat ? sorry kunikida~ i can't hear you right now over the music !! my dearest [name] just taught me how to dance ! and i feel so POWERFUL !! OHH , keep quiet now !! THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART !! "

" DAZAI- "

   atsushi nakajima ! TT

atsushi is a very interesting case when it comes to learning choreography... he tries his best though ! i feel like atsushi is very open to different kinds of music , so kpop is no different to him and enjoys listening to it ! super fascinated by how you managed to learn the dances . always slides in compliments after you finish with a little clap !! atsushi NEVER thinks about learning the choreography himself . he just likes listening to the music . but who is he to say no to you ?

" atsu !! "

" [name] !! what's the matter ? did something happen ? "

" atsushi . you know the one thing that you're missing right now ? it's that you NEED to crash course learn twice choreography with me . there's no backing out now !! "

" wha- ??? wait- HUH ???? "

poor boy is unfortunately a slow learner when it comes to dancing... but he's trying !!! his moves are a bit stiff , but just a little more practice and instructing will do !!!

" it's easy ! one , two , three , four , five , six , seven, eight ! can you try that for me ? "

" umm... one... two... three... four and five and six and seven eight... ?! did i do it ? "

" close !! there's room for improvement , though ! you're doing great though ! for your first time and the easiest twice choreography to learn ! "

" EASIEST ?!? aaahhhh... this is so hard , [name] ..... can we take a break ? "

practices whenever he can . you've seen and walked in on him practicing in front of the mirror and he's always gets soo embarrassed , but slowly he's starting to get the hang of it and you're so proud of him !!!

" one , two , three , four , five , six , seven , eight... "

" well , someone's been doing their homework ! "

" [name] ?! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM- "

overrall , 7/10 . he's proud to know he's finally learned how to perform twice choreography ! (even if the process was literal hell) obviously still struggles sometimes , but very silly and cute when he does it ! kyouka has walked in on him a few times... but she doesn't seem to mind !

" one , two , three , four...- "

" ...why are you dancing ? "

" YEAOW- oh... it's just you , kyouka... practicing this dance [name] taught me ! ah , where was i again...? one , two , three , four , five , six , seven , eight... "

" i didn't know they could dance . maybe i'll ask them about it later... "

   reblogs appreciated ! ♡