#ValastorWeek2024

[kibbles-bits]

:)

@valastorweekofficial

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor Week Bonus: THE DAY AFTER

Poor Vox was clearly abandoned all alone, in the cold and in the dark

But Valastor week was very fun, drawing everyday was a challenge !

[valastorweekofficial]

VALASTOR WEEK 2024: October 14th - October 20nd

The rules:

You need to be at least 18 years old to participate due to the source material being adult themed

Create something for the valastor (Valentino x Alastor) pairing and post it during this week: art, fic, craft etc

Use these prompts as inspiration or find an idea of your own

This is a rareship as is, please keep it as a main focus of your submission

Tag your post as #ValastorWeek2024 and mention @valastorweekofficial so we can share your post

Please keep this event civil - we are here to have fun, not to argue over in-universe morality of the characters involved: they suck, we know

Have fun!

[iliss4]

Day ? - Spy for @valastorweekofficial

i am so happy with this piece (even tho it wasnt planned 🤭)

i blame @lalalalalalakakakak for saying that "val looks like a detective" in my latest val art

[pro-depresanti]

~Valastor Week 2024~

prompt list by @valastorweekofficial

Day 5: Friends and Family

(skipping Day 4 for now because it's still not done and I'm very behind)

Summary: Alastor introduces his boyfriend to his mother. Things go well... mostly!

Setting: 1950s, Living world

Word count: 1587

Warnings: cannibalism, implied murder, murder threats

—————

"And again. From the top."

"Al, I've got it, I swear." As talkative as Valentino usually was, he'd been repeating that same string of 'rules' for the past hour. He was about to get blisters on his tongue at this point.

Alastor didn't budge. Instead, he raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest. Val might be stubborn, but Alastor was more so when he set his mind to something.

This had to be perfect. Flawless. Alastor had already had the very dreadful talk about him having a boyfriend with his mother, and yes, she had taken it pretty well, all things considered. But then she had insisted on meeting said gentleman, which Alastor dreaded even more. So, here they were, a whole day spent tediously teaching Valentino about proper manners, and what not to do.

"Again."

Valentino groaned, his shoulders slumping with the exaggerated gesture. "I refer to her as 'ma'am', no innuendos, no cursing, no mention of anything sexual, no shouting, no complaining, no elbows on the table. I am allowed to only kiss you on the cheek and hold your hand. I eat all the food in front of me, even if I don't like it. I offer my help to clean up after dinner, your mother will decline, I will offer again and get to it."

"And?" Alastor added, tapping his foot.

The other man took a deep breath. "I wear a shirt – buttoned all the way up, and long pants that aren't too tight. Tied up hair, no flashy jewelry. Oh, and no shades."

Finally, Alastor smiled and leaned in for a quick kiss. "Perfect. You'll do great."

"I hope so."

Well, Alastor had done all he could, he wasn't a magician. Except one thing. As he walked out of Val's house, he stopped at the door, holding out his hand to feel the wind. "It's a bit chilly today."

Valentino didn't miss a beat as he grabbed his signature red coat from the hanger, holding it up so Alastor could slip it on. "Here. Can't have you catching a cold."

Alastor suppressed a grin as he took the coat, then folded it over his forearm. As if he would let himself be seen wearing that in public. Inside closed doors, sure, the thing was comfortable and soft, but he had an image to keep. "Thanks. You can have it back after tomorrow."

Valentino blinked back quickly. "Wait–"

"You think I'm trusting you to not wear this in front of my mother?"

Valentino scoffed. "But it's my style. It's me!"

"You look like a pimp with it."

"That's the point!"

Alastor looked up, his eyes glinting in that dangerous way Val knew it meant business. "You can have it after tomorrow. I promise I'll keep it safe and sound."

"But–"

"Bye bye. Be there at seven, sharp." Alastor waved goodbye as he walked out, leaving no space for arguing.

———

Alastor could vividly remember his first radio show, the anxiety that bordered fear, the anticipation, how tight his smile had been. That had been nothing compared to how nervous he was now, bouncing his leg and twirling his fingers as he waited. Time didn't seem to be moving fast enough for his liking. Surely Val wouldn't be late. He couldn't be late. But what if something had happened on his way here, what if–

The knock on the door had him jump in his seat. Luckily, his mother couldn't see him from where she was in the kitchen. Still, she instantly heard the firm knock and walked up swiftly into the hallway, Alastor following suit.

He got it. He could do it. So could Val. It would all be fine.

The woman slung the door open, a warm smile on her lips. Alastor breathed out in relief as he set eyes on Valentino. There he was, with his hair pulled into a low ponytail without a single strand out of place, ironed lavender shirt, cream colored dress pants, and perfectly polished black shoes. No hat with obnoxious feathers, no over the top make-up, no jewelry except a small hoop earring. Alastor honestly wouldn't be able to recognize him if he saw him on the street without doing a double take.

"Good evening, ma'am," Valentino greeted, bowing his head lightly. "It's a pleasure meeting you."

She nodded down in return. "Evening , dear. Valentino, if I'm not mistaken? Alastor has told me so much about you." She held out her hand for a handshake as she introduced herself, then took a step back. "Come in, don't be shy."

Alastor shot Val one last look of 'don't mess this up' as he waited for him to take his shoes off.

Valentino promptly side-eyed him, and without missing a beat said, "you've got a lovely home, ma'am."

"Oh, thank you," she responded as she led the way to the kitchen. "Make yourself comfortable, food will be ready in a minute."

"Anything I could help with?"

"No need, dear. Alastor will set the table."

Valentino sat down, awkwardly looking around as Alastor and his mother maneuvered around each other in the relatively small room. They must have done this before, time and again, cooking together, tidying up afterwards. Fuck, he wasn't getting sentimental over stupid shit like this.

Not even five minutes later and Val was presented with a steaming plate of food that smelled so delicious he was barely containing himself to not dive straight in. Homemade meals weren't exactly in his diet, except for the times Alastor would cook something for them.

"Thank you for the meal, ma'am," he said quickly. "It looks fu– fantastic." No cursing.

"Dig in, then. I hope it's up to your liking."

Val took a bite, already used Alastor's decently good cooking, but that was something else. Hot, spicy, perfectly salted, just absolutely delicious. He said as much once he swallowed, going in for another bite.

"So, Valentino, darling, tell me more about yourself. What do you do for a living and such?"

And now the questioning Alastor had warned him about started. "I'm in the film industry, mostly director, sometimes script writer, other times I cast the actors, whatever is needed." Which, neither of those was a lie per say, but he decided to omit the details.

"How lovely, such a creative mind you have, no wonder you and Al are getting along. And how did you two meet, actually?"

"It's not very interesting of a story, if I'm being honest," was the answer he gave, spearing the truth of 'I saw Alastor in the forest throwing a corpse into the river while I was surveilling for a location to shoot a porno, one thing let to another, and here we are, going on four years strong and counting.'

He went with the story he and Alastor had rehearsed, "we ran into each other in a bookshop, and got to talking about Jane Austen," which was, by absolute coincidence and totally not intentionally picked, the woman's favorite author. "We hung out a few times and finally I decided to ask Al on a date, and the rest is history." He finished the rant by leaning in and kissing Alastor on the cheek, lightly and cute and totally casual.

In all honesty, Valentino hadn't expected the dinner to go so well. No slip ups happened on his end, his jokes were all well timed, and Alastor's mother even offered to teach him how to cook sometime.

And as intrigued, Valentino insisted on helping clean up afterwards, so he ended up in the drying the dishes position while Alastor's mother washed them, and Alastor was sweeping the floor. Alastor had mentioned that his mother would most likely try to adopt Val, but he hadn't expected to be welcomed so warmly–

"Oh, and Valentino," the woman said abruptly, rinsing up a knife. "I almost forgot." She turned to face the man, smile so akin to Alastor's grin it was unnerving. "If you ever even think about hurting my son, I'll find you, gut you, make you into sausages, and use your bones for soup. Are we clear, darling?"

Valentino certainly should have been more terrified. Well, at least now he knew the murderous tendencies ran kn the family. Still, without skipping a beat, he answered, "Yes, ma'am," even though he wouldn't like to admit that his voice shook, "I wouldn't even dream of it."

The woman smiled, and while standing on her tip-toes, reached up and patted Val on top of his head with the hand that was still holding the knife. "Lovely, my dear. Keep that up and I won't have to serve you as a stew. And thank you so much for the help! You're welcome any time you'd like."

———

"Alastor?"

"Yes, dear?"

"What did I eat yesterday?"

"Jambalaya."

"You know what I mean."

"I certainly don't."

Valentino palmed his forehead. "Al. Did I eat human meat?"

"I believe you've eaten quite the assortment of humans, dear."

Valentino was more shocked from the innuendo coming from Alastor than the possibility of unintentionally consuming a human. "That's not what I mean and you know it!"

Alastor stared him in confusion. "I don't know what you're talking about?"

Valentino grabbed Alastor by the shoulders. "Alastor. What was the meat in the dish your mother served me yesterday?"

"Human? Wasn't it obvious? Why do you think our cooking is so good?"

Our?! As in, Alastor's cooking too?! The one he had been feeding Val for the last four years?!?!

—————

Author's note: hey, Day 4 has been kicking my ass, but I'm working on it! I haven't written smut in years, I'm pretty out of shape.

[valastorweekofficial]

the extra early submission that made mod check the calendar in panic skskks thank you for the submission!

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen, M/M

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)

Relationships: Alastor/Valentino (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor & Valentino (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor & Velvette (Hazbin Hotel)

Characters: Valentino (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Vox (Hazbin Hotel), Velvette (Hazbin Hotel)

Additional Tags: can be read as a stand-alone story, Flirting, Jealousy, Alastor and Vox Have a History (Hazbin Hotel), Minor Valentino/Velvette/Vox (Hazbin Hotel), vox is jealous of both alastor AND val woah, Alastor is a Little Shit (Hazbin Hotel), Shotgunning, POV Valentino (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor & Velvette Friendship (Hazbin Hotel), val and vel like vox's ex better than him, Valastor Week 2024 (Hazbin Hotel)

Language: English

Series: Part 2 of We love your ex-boyfriend!

Words: 5,181

Chapters: 1/1

@valastorweekofficial

Alastor’s eyebrows crept further towards his hairline as Val breathed in the smoky-sweet smell of him, like burnt sugar. “So, you mean to say that you want to use me as a bone to wave about and taunt Vox with?” “Don’t sound so offended,” Val chuckled with a slight roll of his eyes. “I’m not saying we should fuck right here on this counter.” He paused, giving Alastor a look, though the other man took a long, deliberate sip of his drink, staring flatly at Val, who clicked his tongue and continued. “But a little playful flirting never went amiss, eh?” ~*~ Valentino is dragged to an event by Vox and is not having a good time. That is, until he spots a familiar face in the crowd and thinks up the perfect way to get his revenge.

[persephoneblck]

Sepphy’s Valastor Week

Day 7 Lemon Demon Stealing Whore

TW Inaccurate description of tech.

@valastorweekofficial

This is Valastor week, Vox is not getting his happy ending.

The wonderful thing about being seen as nothing but a whore and a pimp is that people underestimate you. Valentino is used to this, out of the three V’s he is the one that is seen as the less threatening. Velvette and Vox are always treated with more respect.

Valentino enjoys watching the way that people’s eyes go wide with fear when they realize that he isn’t a bitch.

Valentino is more volatile and his emotions get the best of him, but he also became an Overlord before Vox came into his life. Earned his power and his spot even with his explosive temper, people tended to be more cautious when they thought that you would end them over the slightest provocation.

It was only after they had become so high profile that Vox started to hold Valentino back. Valentino allowed it; it was easier to let someone else be in charge and party.

It was easier and more profitable, but now he had something else he wanted more than leisure, ease, and money.

Valentino searched in a drawer he hadn’t opened in ages and dug out a thick pair of glasses. He poured himself a drink and began the arduous process of reading through the contract that Vox wrote. Studied it and made notes on the margins. It took him hours and his head hurt but the pain vanished when he found out what he had been looking for.

It is a way to keep Alastor all to himself, keep Vox out of their lives, and keep the contract intact.

Vox looked over the lab that was rebuilding his body. He had added some improvements to his build. A knot that he would use to keep himself buried in Alastor. Increased stamina and ability to withstand charges.

Virtually, he jumped around anxiously.

He was almost at ninety percent; after that, it would only be a day or two before he could reemerge.

Vox switched cameras to look at Alastor. Vox had kept him company while he had his morning coffee.

Enjoying it but vividly yearning to hold Alastor’s hand across the table, to kiss him before they left to work, to come home to watch him prepare dinner.

Vox switched the camera to the one that overlooked the Hotel, and he could see his husband sitting with the Princess, listening to her go over her plans for redemption. Alastor’s ears twitched, no doubt picking up his electric signature.

The slight curve of his smile let Vox knew that Alastor knew that he was being watched. Ever since, Valentino had slowly introduced Alastor to the more pleasurable aspects of physical affection. Alastor had been more agreeable and more comfortable with it.

It had surprised him that Valentino had restrained himself so far, but Vox knew that Alastor spurred him to be the best version of himself. Their future looked bright

Vox was completely lost in looking at his deer when he should have been more concerned when the power flickered.

It is only when he feels less substantial that he looks into the secure server room cameras and finds someone he never expected to see there.

Valentino is holding electrical tape and sharp scissors.

He watches, horrified, as Valentino starts bypassing his failsafes to gain access to the servers and hard drives.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Vox screams over the speakers

“Took you long enough to notice; I thought I wouldn’t get a chance to tell you what will happen,” Valentino blew smoke into the server room.

Vox can feel his system slow.

“What are you talking about?” Vox demanded.

“See, I read this contract, every damn page Vox,” Valentino laughed as he turned to the pages that had given him the idea.

“You specifically mention that Velvette can’t come in here or try to end you. That Alastor and I can not kill you, and that Alastor isn’t allowed anywhere near the server because he might make it glitch and accidentally harm you, but you put no restrictions on me. I was wondering why?” Valentino put a set of hands on his waist while he adjusts his glasses with the other.

“What the fuck are you talking about Val?” Vox demanded, his face being played out along the available screens. Valentino’s heels clack on the tile floor as he walks behind the servers and looks at the cords. It had taken him a while, but he had figured out how to do this; he had to watch a few videos and sleep with a couple of nerds, but they were happy enough to talk to him about anything after sex with him. There are a few straightforward things to do.

“This room is very cold, Vox; I think you might get sick if you stay at this temperature,” Valentino says innocently.

“This room is supposed to be kept cold to keep the server from overheating! You fucking idiot,” Vox screams.

Valentino has manually shut off some of the important vents, so he must call someone to fix them immediately. When Vox goes to send a message, he finds out he can only contact Valentino. The sounds of Valentino cracking the main touchscreen and removing the one physical keyboard make him turn to him.

“What?” Vox’s voice trembles.

“All of this technology, all these backup plans, get derailed by the simplest thing. Should have kept a failsafe lever or button, Vox, but you like the sleep look of a touchscreen, don’t you,” Valentino teased. It had been a point of contention between Alastor and Vox that Alastor didn’t trust anything you couldn’t turn off and on without a physical button. This, however, was his server room; it was all very modern and advanced. Vox could materialize out of the server for a moment but he lacks the interface in that form to make the screens respond to his commands and Valentino has now taken the one keyboard that he could possibly use.

“Whatever you are thinking, Valentino, you will never be able to do it,” Vox argued.

“You are right. I can’t do it alone, but I can do it with Alastor and Velvette,” Valentino points out.

“He will not help you; he will ask about me; he is waiting for me!” Vox screams.

“Yes, but you put it in the contract that he will have to help me with your business if it should come to it. We will have to work closely while waiting for you to return. I am looking forward to all those late nights alone,” Valentino licks his lips and leans against a wall, long legs crossed in front of him.

“He is going to wonder why I am not back yet!” Vox protests.

“I know he will. He is truly fond of you, but you won’t be able to tell him anything. I will make sure of that. If you ever want to speak to him again, you will do exactly as I say, or I will enact the second part of my plan,” Valentino threatens and snaps the scissors and cuts through a few cables connecting the drives. Vox feels parts of himself vanish watches horrified as Valentino tapes the pieces back together to hide that anything is wrong. He walks around and places tape over the vents to minimize the air available to cool the system down. Even if anyone came in here, they might not have found the correct cables to replace or vents to clear.

“What do you want?” Vox demands

“Ahhh, now I have your attention. I want Alastor,” Valentino states simply.

Vox stares at him, waiting for something else to come out of his mouth.

“What? Why? You don’t like him,” Vox argues

“On the contrary, I do, see unlike you he treats me with respect. He doesn’t belittle me, even defended me. That took some getting used to, but I like it,” Valentino explains, his smile wide and pleased.

Vox predictably starts to rage but with one of the hard drives unable to run to it’s full potential he starts to glitch and has to calm down.

“See, you made me the boss in absentia; as long as you are resetting yourself, I make decisions. So I decided you need to spend more time getting together. I am going to cut some more of the cables strategically, and you will restart again from forty percent or so, but because you will overheat, you will be caught in an endless loop of restarting. The reset points will vary, and you can talk to Alastor, but you won’t ever remember why it is happening until it is too late. Eventually, the poor deer will have to accept that you are not salvageable. And I will be there to console him, offer him a shoulder to lean on, and a cock to fill that empty space your absence leaves behind.

I look forward to exploring that part of our partnership in time,” Valentino taunts Vox.

“Fuck you…don’t you dare touch him,” Vox rages and quickly has to stop because the screens flash a warning.

“I have, and you are very good darling, but Alastor…he is everything. I can now see what you see in him. How you became so smitten, I have to say it is more addicting than anything I can come up with, being with him, being in love,” Valentino explains.

“You don’t love anyone, Valentino; you love sex, you love power, and we have a relationship based on that,” Vox reminds him.

“We are excellent friends, but what is a friend to the love of my life? Don’t worry you will be able to watch, I know how much you enjoy that. We can make a deal if and when you are ready to come back on my terms. If it becomes too much to deal with, well, you can self-terminate yourself. That won’t hurt me or Alastor. Now, you will restart. I will be back in a week to check on you, and we will take it from there. If you are good, I will let you reassure him that everything is fine; it's just a little technical difficulty. Remember not to say a word to our sweet darling; we don’t want to upset him,” Valentino explains.

With the vents closed on the hard drives, one of them overheats and resets, and Vox feels another ten percent of him vanish. It flashes back and forth, so he rapidly goes up and down on how much of him is put back together.

“That should keep you cycling between forty and seventy-five percent,” Valentino announces as he tucks the scissors and tape into his coat.

“Valentino, if you hurt him, I swear…” Vox snaps out, his teeth massive on the screen.

“I just told you that I have no plans of hurting him; I plan on loving him until he feels the same,” Valentino sighs.

“You won’t be able to touch him without my hypnosis,” Vox reminds Valentino.

“Oh honey, that was before we spent that night together; he’s not as averse to my touch as you think,” Valentino smirks, holding up his phone to the screen before him. Vox squints at the images, but he can see a compilation of their most recent embraces, of Alastor lingering in Valentino’s embrace as the taller sinner whispers things that make Alastor close his eyes and allow himself to be held. Of Valentino asking Alastor to dance after the embrace and taking a turn around their kitchen, even of them sitting close to each other, Valentino is clearly enraptured at whatever Alastor is telling him. At the same time, Alastor looks up at him, his face flushed from whatever he is drinking.

“You traitorous slut!” Vox sneers at the sinner on his server floor, but all Valentino does is shrug his shoulders.

“That’s right, I am just a silly slut way in over my head; I better go ask Alastor to help me look at the numbers,” Valentino announces.

Vox finally realizes how badly his perception of Valentino has clouded his decisions.

Vox turns, intent on getting on a camera to speak to Alastor and Velvette, but finds that Valentino has gone around and disconnected the speakers from every device he tries.

The cameras available to him have also shrank in numbers since his servers and hard drives are restarting at odd intervals.

Vox can only watch Valentino practically dance towards Alastor to greet him on his return from work. Vox wishes he could cry in this form, but he can only stare as he watches Alastor laugh at something Valentino whispers in his ear. He has to endure watching Valentino place a hand on Alastor’s lower back and can only watch as Valentino guides Alastor away from view to do who knows what out of his sight.

It is the last thing Vox processes before his server restarts, and he loses consciousness.

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor Week Day 6: POLYAMORY

@valastorweekofficial

But of course it’s PolyVee+Alastor. They catch him with a Masterball. (It’s a joke, please don’t come at my throat)

And I am very tired, so here, just this classic meme:

Bonus: this shit I did in 15 minutes this afternoon at work with a pen. (is it poly to prevent your husbands from killing each other? Probably)

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor week day 2: LOVE POTION

@valastorweekofficial

It’s the day 2 so it’s the brand new Love Potion 2!! With more toxic chemicals than ever!! New tasty flavor!!

Please read the instructions on the back of the bottle before using it.

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor week Day 5: FRIENDS AND FAMILY (more than half of them aren’t there willingly)

@valastorweekofficial

The lil comic below is super rushed BUT I AM ALREADY 1 hour late for today’s prompt so whateverrrrr

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This is the infamous double moth @grimfeywizard the brainrotting is reaaaalllll

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor week day 3: FAIRYTALE (Cinderella)

It’s VALERELLA!!!!!

@valastorweekofficial

AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

At first I wanted to do Little Red Hood, but I was unable to draw Alastor in a bed dressed as a granny. Here is a doodle I did:

The outfit and the little moth were inspired by @grimfeywizard cute doodles

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Let’s goooooooo!!!!

Valastor week day 1: ARRANGED MARRIAGE (they have everything already arranged)

@valastorweekofficial

Val believed that having a priest to perform the wedding was essential.

So Alastor suggested kidnapping Vox.

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor week day 7: FREEEEE

@valastorweekofficial

How tumblr handles video? I have no idea but here is also the image:

Bonus: Velvette scientist

[lalalalalalakakakak]

Valastor week day 4: GUILTY PLEASURE

@valastorweekofficial

I had no time today to do silly comics. So here some horrible photoshopped screenshots:

“Do you mind? I’m in the middle of breakfast”

[iliss4]

Summary:

It’s been a day since the long negotiations between the Vees and the Hotel crew came to a stalemate that exploded into a show of spectacular pettiness. Nobody trusted the other side to hold their part without a proper Deal while simultaneously refusing to shake on anything. The hostage situation on both sides (or as one more romantic member of the meeting, namely Charlie, put it - “the arranged marriage”) seemed like an obvious solution.

for the @valastorweekofficial

[pro-depresanti]

~Valastor Week 2024~

prompt list by @valastorweekofficial

Day Two: Love Potion

Summary: Alastor tests out Val's new Love Potion. Valentino escapes within an inch of his life and with two less fingers. Alastor learns the hard way to not accept drinks from a pimp. With a pinch of my beloved Religious!Valentino headcanon.

Setting: Modern times a bit before the start of the show, Hell, Alastor and Valentino are dating

Word count: 2165

Warnings: drug use/overdose(?), unsuccessful induced vomiting, blood and violence

──────

As soon as Alastor heard the sharp clicking of heels, he knew something was up. Maybe a sixth sense, maybe the fact that Val would never ruin his persona by being in a hurry. Whatever it was, Alastor was certain he'd find out soon enough whether he liked it or not.

Valentino approached him to where the deer demon was sitting on the couch with a book in his hands. Smiled up so widely the corners of his mouth strained. "Heeeey, Alastor. Amorcito, baby, light of my life, my most precious–"

Alastor looked up from his book. "What do you want, my dear?" It was just now he noticed one of Val's hands was very carefully tugged behind him. No, Alastor did not like where this was going.

"Me? Wanting something?" The moth demon exclaimed, placing a hand on his chest in faux hurt. "Bambi, I would never–" after Alastor glared, Valentino finally dropped the sickly sweet facade. "I need you to test something."

That sentence coming from the mouth of the Overlord of all things sexual, was the last thing Alastor wanted to hear. Still, he hummed in acknowledgement, nodding to Val to continue.

The moth demon held out his hand, presenting to Alastor a glass bottle, about the size of a flask, pink liquid sloshing in it.

"And you need me for what reason exactly?" Alastor asked.

"If it works on an Overlord, then I'll know it will work on anyone, and I can't exactly try it myself."

"To my knowledge you work with two other Overlords besides me. Ask them, perhaps."

Valentino sighed. "You see... it's a funny story actually... but let's just say neither Vox, nor Velvette will take drinks from me."

Ha, who could have guessed. "I think I'll follow Vox's footsteps for once."

Valentino huffed, then instantly went to the almost pity inducing desperate persona, puppy eyes and all. "Come on, please. Pretty please? For me?" That obviously didn't do anything for Alastor, so Val finally straightened up and cleared his throat. "I transfer fifty of my contracts to you. Your pick, no limitations except Angel Dust."

Alastor involuntarily licked his lips. Certainly there would be some poor souls under Valentino that perfectly fit his high criteria for a meal. "And what's that thing you're so persistently trying to get me to consume?"

The hesitation was enough to tell the deer demon enough. Still, after carefully considering his words. "My saliva mixed with some chemicals to make the effect last longer." As soon as Alastor opened his mouth, Val interrupted him. "I've already tested it, but I don't know if those whores were exaggerating or not, but it's safe. I just don't know how effective it is. And don't look at me all grossed out as if I've never had my tongue down your throat."

Well, true, but there was a difference between that, and drinking spit from a bottle.

"Make it a hundred contracts," Val added quickly.

But, the grossness didn't exactly outweigh the possibility of some fresh meat. And, the non-physical powers weren't as effective between Overlords as they would be on a regular sinner. Hence why Alastor could kiss Val pretty much all he wanted and would merely get lightheaded afterwards. So, logically speaking, this concoction shouldn't have had all that much effect. Probably. Hopefully.

Alastor held out his hand, green tendrils coiling around him. "You transfer me two hundred contracts of my choosing. You would not speak of this to anyone, ever. And while I'm under the influence of this thing, you would not coarse, force, or otherwise make me do anything I wouldn't normally do." While yes, he and Val were technically together, they were still Overlords about to shake hands. Trust was there, sure, but Alastor also heavily relied on the fact that, under normal circumstances, he could fight off Val. Some habits died hard, and Valentino only respected safe words in the form of a carefully calculated kick to the crotch.

Valentino rolled his eyes. "As if I would even think about forcing the Radio Demon." What would have actually surprised him is for Alastor to just accept without a proper deal. So be it. He shook the deer demon's hand, pink and green light dancing around each other before dissolving into an explosion.

Now that there wasn't any backing out, Alastor reached for the glass bottle, opened the lid, and tipped it down, determined to take it like a shot.

Valentino realized that last part all but a second too late, instantly grabbing Alastor by the wrist. "No! Just a few drops!" Too late. Alastor had already downed half of it.

As unfazed as ever, Alastor smacked his lips. "This tastes like you and formaldehyde." Then he hummed, "not bad."

"Oh no, this is very bad," Valentino borderline shouted. "Fuck. Fuuuck." He started pacing around the couch, top set of hands holding his head, the other two waving around in a panic. "I should have clarified–"

Alastor just followed him around with his eyes, noticing the slight blur of his vision. Nothing much happened besides the expected drowsiness. Just a lingering taste and the familiar heaviness of alcohol setting into his stomach.

And just like cheap alcohol, a wave of dizziness smacked his skull. His ears started ringing, and his skin tingled uncomfortably, almost like a shiver, except for the fact that he was very much burning up.

He took in a deep breath and leaned against the back of the couch. He had dealt with worse things. It would pass. He just needed to keep his eyes open and try his best to ignore the disorientation. He wasn't even panicking, his head empty of thoughts.

Actually, this was nice. Peaceful almost. If that was how Val's pheromones usually affected sinners, Alastor could understand the appeal. The world around him felt distanct, muffled, surreal almost. The corners of his vision had dissolved to nothing but blobs of color, his head buzzing loud enough to cover up any other sound. His muscles tensed and relaxed in quick succession, something akin to a pulsing but painless headache through his entire body.

It was pleasant for a solid ten seconds, before his body jerked forward. No. He was getting moved. Dragged, more specifically. There were too many hands on him. One of them made contact with his bare cheek and he swore his face was going to melt off. Yet as soon as the brief contact was over, he involuntarily moved towards it, the leftover tingling, strong enough to hurt, much more unpleasant.

He tried to say something, realizing halfway that his mouth wasn't cooperating. Neither were his legs for that matter as his feet were dragged against the floor. Someone was talking. Loudly. Yet the words didn't register. He looked up, a red blob of color standing out against the blur of muted pinks.

Meanwhile, Valentino was absolutely losing his shit. He had no idea what that big of a dosage would do, but it certainly wouldn't be pretty. He practically dragged Alastor from the lounge room to the bathroom, quickly spitting out reassurance that fell on deaf ears.

"Al, we need to get you to throw up, okay? Then you'll feel better, yeah? It's not so bad, you'll feel fine afterwards." And no, Valentino was totally not saying that to reassure himself. "I'll owe you a favor, whatever you ask."

He let Alastor fall knees first to the floor, barely catching his upper body before the deer demon could hit his head against the porcelain. But Alastor was awake, eyes half lidded but open, scanning his surroundings. He slurred out something, and even Valentino with his experience with talking to drugged demons, couldn't decipher.

Slowly, he pried Alastor's mouth open, not meeting any resistance. "Take in a deep breath for me. Ready?"

No response. Great. Valentino haphazardly took off the gold caps on his index and middle finger, held Alastor's head to angle it downwards and got to it.

Alastor might not have been able to string a proper thought together, but his tongue easily recognized the feeling of skin. And bone. Two thin, long, bony pieces of meat. Fingers. Not his favorite, but Rosie had gotten him to like them as a light snack.

And he was hungry. So hungry. That must have been why his stomach felt so weird. He was hungry, and there was food in his mouth, there was only one logical course of action.

Valentino shouted so loudly he doubted the soundproofing on his entire floor could contain it. He yanked his hand out of Alastor's mouth, staring in shock at the space his two fingers should have been, now bitten clean off at the last knuckle. He cradled it to his chest, cursed under his breath, and was about to try again, this time holding Alastor's bottom jaw in place, but alas, the Radio Demon had other ideas.

Alastor snapped his head back 180°, staring directly at Valentino, eyes now fully focused. He chewed, loudly, then audibly swallowed, licked the few drops of blood that had spilled past his lips. "Hungry," he said, barely audible through the layers of static.

Valentino unlocked a brand new level of fear as he watched Alastor's magic swirling around him to form the familiar tentacles, his form growing taller with his head still twisted the wrong way.

The moth demon took a step back, all of his arms raised in surrender as he walked backwards towards the door. "Al? Al, let's talk about this. We can go fetch you someone to eat–"

Radio static echoed again the tiled bathroom, making Val flinch. But that was the least of his problems as Alastor, now at least twice as tall as the other Overlord, hunched over to fit under the ceiling, stepped towards.

And, stupidly of him, Valentino ran. Alastor, a bit clumsily followed close behind, more static frying every piece of electronic in the building, probably even the block.

Valentino had barely made it halfway into the lounge room before one of the tentacles had grabbed him by the legs and lifted him up. Alastor's mouth opened, lined with teeth as big as Valentino's palm, tongue lolling out as it uncurled.

"Padre nuestro, que estás en el cielo," Valentino recited the Lord's prayer under his breath as he was brought towards the enormous chasm of a mouth. "Santificado sea tu nombre. Venga tu reino–"

Just as he was inches away from being bitten in half, Alastor froze. In the blink of an eye, the tentacles dissolved in thin air, dropping Valentino from a good thirty feet. The green magic span around Alastor as he reverted back to his regular form, the deer demon slamming face first into the carpet.

Valentino scrambled backwards until he hit a wall, panting and shaking like one of his unseasoned whores. He waited a moment, two, ten, until he realized Alastor was not moving. "Alastor–"

He screamed as a door slammed open. Vox. Of course he noticed all his tech short circuiting.

"What the actual–" Vox started, shouting, before he took in the scene – bleeding and cornered Valentino, Alastor laying on the floor like a taxidermy carpet.

"I'm under a deal not to talk about this," Valentino explained quickly. "You saw nothing!"

"Is he–"

"I don't know!"

──

Alastor hated getting petted. Absolutely despised it. But, for once, he found the playing with his hair soothing. Valentino and his touchy self. Typical. He peaked an eye open, and goodness, his head was killing him. More then that one time a whole building fell on top of him, which said a lot. And he was thirsty. And hungry. And the light was annoying. He groaned and tossed around.

"Al!"

"Shut it." His ears were ringing. He was not in the mood to have a conversation.

"Sorry," Valentino whispered. "Are you okay?"

"I'm absolutely dainty, my dear."

"I'll make it up to you, I swear! Fuck, I didn't–"

Alastor turned around to face the moth demon, trying to focus. "For what?"

"You– you don't remember?"

Alastor stared dumbly, until it clicked. Val wanted him to try some concoction. Then they shook on it. "What happened..."

"Long story short, you tried to eat me."

Alastor hummed, then licked inside his mouth. "Is that why my mouth tastes like rancid blood?"

Valentino nodded slowly. "Al, I swear, I had no idea you were going to down half the bottle! Next time–"

Alastor grimaced, letting static into the air. Valentino flinched. "There won't be a next time because I'm never, accepting a drink from you. And I better have a nice, lean sinner that's not ridden with opioids within an arm's reach in the next minute."

"On it!" Valentino exclaimed as he sprang out of the bed and ran like his life depended on it, because it most likely did.

──────

Author note: this was fun to write lol. Coming from a questioning asexual – I get horny when I'm hungry, so I thought, 'hey, maybe it works the same in reverse!', so here we are! Honestly, it was Val's fault to put his fingers in the mouth of a cannibal!