#and also eat/live/etc in nyc

[pure-0f-heart-dumb-0f-ass]

An absolutely STACKED musical theatre cast!!!! Like I was like WHERE do you get the BUDGET for all these extremely impressive gets???

Bezos, man.

But also most Broadway performers are very firmly middle class (if that) while on contract, and while off contract struggle to make ends meet, so I imagine a lot of the more purely Broadway folks were cheaper than you’d think.

[melancholicstation]

being JFK jr.'s assistant: a collection of headcanon's!

authors note: many apologies if this is illegible, i didn't have time to edit, also tried something new with the formatting of the moodboard. let me know your thoughts, feelings etc. for context this is set in NYC, early 1995, with assistant!reader working to aid in the start-up of john's political magazine 'george' ahead of its september release!

the interview process is most ardently held at harry cipriani's

john get's the chicken spezzatino al curry with spiced rice, and you get the cucumber salad with avocado, cherry tomatoes, and corn...

which was intentionally picked by you as it was the least expensive thing your eyes could scan on the menu as you weren't sure that your current waitress salary could sustain a cipriani-bill type of hit.

(little did you know, john had every intention of picking up the bill at the end of the interview)

you get the job with little fanfare, i get the feeling that john would try to keep it professional-ish initially (though I feel he would keep a pretty casual atmosphere with his employees)

i feel that john would throw the craziest work holiday party ever to existence!

and that's where i would posit you and John would hit it off and maybe engage in a few cheeky workplace clandestine touches/neck kisses/murmurs of praise that could be regarded by outsiders as a normal boss/employee dynamic

there's definitely some on-and-off period between you and john, mostly caused by you because of your (valid) reservations over the power-dynamic and not wanting to screw up a very high paying job in the city

however, i feel that through you learning john and his personality and temperament your worries about toxic dynamics that could fester fall to the wayside!

once the media gets a whiff of your relationship with john, it's lady di when she first started her courtship with king charles—levels of paparazzi and media attention from the gossip rags and daytime television shows

this is the energy of the pap shots: very much giving a chic defiance against ever giving the paparazzi the attention they so clearly court:

he would be very protective of you in the media, especially since you never intended to be thrust into such a harsh and unforgiving spotlight when you first applied for the administrative position at the magazine

he would absolutely bargain information about himself to press just to give you a break in the media (which is saying something as he seemed to genuinely loathe press intrusion)

despite not having time to actually prepare him a meal for him to eat at the office (since you have, y'know, an actual job to do) you order him a jambon-beurre from rigor hill market,

and attach a handwritten note (something soft, and tender, and embarrassing saccharine) using the leftover parchment concealing the lunch

i'm picturing assistant!reader's style to oscillate between 90s minimalism and couture avant-garde due to her career in print magazines. think masculine pieces (suits, loafers, polo's, ringer tees...) that give a feminine edge because of the painstaking couture level tailoring that reveal the reader's shape:

a daily uniform to the george magazine office would be: a poplin sky blue tuxedo shirt (unbuttoned to the second button to make it more dégagé) for the top, a menswear-inspired tailored prada jacket to throw atop, the matching prada trousers for the bottom.

for the accessories i feel that while the silhouette and basic clothing articles are minimalist, assistant!reader would get a bit playful and more outré!

assistant!reader would NOT fall for the birkin bait however she would be fan of hermēs because of their craftsmanship and dedication to "old-world" quality control. she shops semi-frequently (cause i know our john-john is giving her a mammoth salary for an assistant living in NYC)

she has an SA (sales assistant) who knows her family members birthdays, and always sends a courteous card in honour of the occasion

i distinctly feel that assistant!reader wouldn't go for a kelly (or the aforementioned birkin) but instead perhaps she would go for a hermēs 'bolide', 'plume', or a 'lindy' in more muted colors that are still kind of reminiscent of mid-century paint swatches

here's a few cursory examples of the type of colors assistant!reader would be seen traipsing around the city with: rouge de coeur, rose jaipur, vert anis, vintage bambou, ultra violet clemence, orange H clemence, bleu aztec clemence (just to name a few, lol!)

i definitely don't think she would add any keychains around the bag—the silhouette of the leather would undoubtably speak for itself

(and she certainly would not attach a labubu to ANY of her expensive leather goods... seriously what are you people doing? you are under spells people! spells!)

reader assistant definitely has an account like @/lizzybenz on tiktok (i am utterly entranced with her and her sense of style/restraint of taste. she does quick outfit videos and keeps the rest of her life pretty private and that's such a vibe all the time and definitely assistant!readers vibe)

i feel like you and john's relationship would be pretty esoteric and hush-hush towards the media and people you both didn't know intimately.

that is, unless the relationship starts to get truly serious: an engagement is present/impending, or you move in together...

if that ever were to occur (you two moving in together or getting engaged) i'd picture it to be years later from the genesis of your relationship in a era where you've moved on from being john's assistant and work in a higher position either at 'george' or another publishing house in the city! (just because the assistant boss power dynamic could get annoying at best and noxious at worst)

i'm imagining that you two, in the early stages of your courtship, would go to the cape or perhaps somewhere closer to home base—amagansett.

the picture's would be reminiscent of this nature: (disregard the iphone quality—imagine it to be the much more flattering nineties film quality)

you habitually steal johns shirts to wear around the house

it's so bad to the point where he genuinely believes someone might creeps into the apartment at night with the primary intention to burglarise specifically his graphic t-shirts and no other valuables.

here are some delightful examples of what i'm picturing (some are links to ebay listings, others are brick and mortar, and others are simply digital): left, middle, right

he encourages you to buy some of your own so you do (at bergdorf ) and they tend to have more of a feminine silhouette such as: this, this, and this.

but you mostly use them for public, more casual outings and still you use his t-shirts for you to slumber in and to traipse around the apartment,

which he feigns to be annoyed at but he really isn't...

in fact it might even strike a possessive strike in him that had prior been left dormant in previous relationship's of his

so random but that man would be amazing at imitating bird sounds!

i just feel that in my heart #my truth

which makes sense, at least to me, because John seems like the type to very much peacock around his girlfriend to get her attention! as he is ought to do.

authors note: anyways, i didn't know where to end this, so I'm ending it here. off to have some earl grey and vanilla ice cream! sendinggentlenessandbountsoflove,

as a cute side quest, i made some outfit formulas that i could picture assistant!reader wearing for different occasions! hopeyouenjoy!

□ rudimentary solo polo-bar date

□ for rainy days (literally for rainy city days)

□ a harry's cipriani rendezvous with john

□ winter washington meet with the family

□ fashion after-party

love, melancholicstation

tags: @rocker-chick-7 @ultr4v1ol3nt @violetharmonsfavgf @strip-weather-forecast @darcyspirits @fortheloveofjos @h-l-v-kennedy-blog @h-l-vlovesvintage @bluelancergirl @snowsgames @salvatoresablondie @dulcegal @kennedyism @bloxholden35 @kimcrystal123 @absurdlyvintage @jackiesgirl @remotewatch @stargiirl27 @strryhaze @bluevelvetsunset @recentremreports

[movingthisblogcelestialtarot11]

If you were a celeb, what would your vibe be? 💋🎬🌟 professions, careers etc 😍✨

Hi friends! Today we’ll be looking into something pretty fun! Your vibe as a celeb 💅🏻 enjoy and feel free to comment like and reblog 💗

Pile 1: Hi there pile 1’s! 🤗🌟 For pile 1 I am picking up you would be a singer or a musician of some kind. I’m seeing RGB lighting in a concert, slow dancing from you itself, holding the microphone and it’s a jazz kind of vibe. Slow and sensual, but enough to grip you because of the tantalizing way you sing 🤍 some of ya’ll may have beautiful voices! For some of ya’ll you have an indie vibe and keep it fun, lively, and sometimes sensual in the concerts 💅🏻 I also see you guys would have an awesome costume designer capturing a retro vintage style of dressing. Very dreamy colors, makeup, and visuals that is alluring. I feel you’d have such an alluring appearance and you’re private as well, you may not post personal information to the public but mostly share your band, music, and travels 🤗🤍 I absolutely adore this pile because this is my kind of music 😍 if ya’ll had a band already I’d book tickets! You’d travel to popular places like LA and the West Coast, NYC, Boston, I also heard Oregon…? That may resonate for a few of you 😂 But you love your fans and you’d have a close relationship with them, and i feel as a celeb your music is incredibly important. I feel like you’d make a lot of music based on romance & love and capturing how that feels. I feel like you’d be the celeb to bring back that teenager in us and thats why fans love you! 🤗💗 you cultivate a powerful community because you bring together nostalgic feelings & memories. I feel like people would definitely admire you a lot, and they’d love if you held Q&A sessions so they got to know your history with music, how you started, and how you met your band 👏 You’d have such a sex appeal too because you appear dreamy, comfortable, radiant and yet private 💋✨ some of yall may not be into music but modeling too, and you’d have a very dreamy appearance and unique look! Thank you my pile 1’s! Feel free to support by liking commenting and reblogging 🤍🌟

Pile 2: Hi there pile 2’s! We’ve got some influencers up in here in terms of health & wellness. Also fitness. I feel you guys would encourage your fans to eat healthier, and you’d do intensive research into healthier foods and holistic medicine 🌟💗 and as a result people really like you because you give them alternatives to medicine and popping pills 😂 also because I feel like you have a beautiful visual appearance. You appear put together, clean, professional and fun! You have a light hearted yet determined aura and people feel attracted to that 💅🏻✨ some of ya’ll might vlog & talk about your day, and people are invested in your workout routine, diet, and health! And also some of yall may have dogs so your fans would love them 🤗 I also feel like ya’ll would do wonderful creating your own wellness products and selling fitness related gear, people would love that! Especially those with disabilities that still want to work out. There’s something about you and how you create wellness products that are unique, they are designed for people that struggle or need help. I feel you hear your fans and you want to deliver results that are efficient and effective. I feel you’d work wonderfully with children too, and may pair up with organizations catered to the disabled and poverty. So people see you as incredibly humble, helpful, and supportive! You’re incredibly engaging with your fans & community and open to feedback! I feel like you’d be a great motivation speaker too, not because you’re aggressive but because you’re calm, efficient, and reliable in your tone. And you validate people’s experiences and feelings! People are drawn to your reassuring, gentle and determined personality 🤍🌟 you’d do great marketing fitness products too, or makeup products as well! If you’re into makeup you’d model and your fans love your reviews, they love how you do your makeup with precision and you’re unique with it too. You have innovative makeup ideas that people never thought of and it turns out beautiful 😍 I also feel you’d have something unique about your appearance and people cant forget it! It makes you stand out & beautiful 🤗💗 Overall you’d be open with your fans, inclusive, diverse and focus on educating them with health or tips for beauty 💗✨ so maybe you’re south asian and you want to make south asian makeup for those with olive undertones! That would be catering to a specific demographic! And people would greatly appreciate you because of how inclusive you are 🌟 thank you pile 2! Feel free to like comment and reblog for support 🤍

Pile 3: Hi there pile 3! So happy you’re here 🤍🤗 Lets get on with it shall we? Some of yall may have a welsh accent 😂 anyway! I feel like yall have great jokes and would be known for your comedy. Maybe you blow up as a meme at first and then you get into acting 💅🏻 and people are taken away by your skills and effort! You are effortlessly hilarious and yet intentional, and you’d be recognized for it. I feel you have a lot of charisma as a celeb too, because you’re natural at getting people to like you. You’re very good at conversation and with one conversation you’d have someone gripped. Especially an interviewer. I see a lot of people interviewing you & wanting to get to know you. Huge audience, and you love it all! Sometimes anxious, but eventually you and your PR form great bonds so they know when to pull you out 😂 but anyway, I feel like you’re a natural at understanding what to do, how to do it, and you’re overall amazing! You’d do wonderful in movies and tv shows! Some of ya’ll could also be a runway model, and behind the scenes your humor is what gets you noticed and you go on to have your own page, where you sell to your own fans any product 💗 and I feel like you’d keep a healthy distance with your fans! I also feel you’d have such a striking appearance especially your eyes, theres something very different and unique about the color or intensity. It leaves interviewers forgetting what they said 🤣 but they definitely are hooked! You have a lot of sex appeal and you may not realize it, but people do. People also create sexual fantasies of you in their mind & they daydream about you. You could take care of your body a lot and people admire that! Thank you pile 3 feel free to comment like or reblog! 💗🌟 thank yall so much!

Paid Readings 🤍✨

[kaytheday]

Gender Bent Dallas Winston

(Based on the Outsiders Miscast with Anna Bermudez as Dallas)

Her name is still Dallas by the way. 

Dally got pregnant in NYC and she got a self illegal abortion. Due to the laws at the time, she would have been prosecuted for murder, so she left. 

Has no problems getting into fights with other girls and sometimes guys too. Not really the jealous type in relationships but has literally scalped girls before for even flirting with the boy she’s going with at the time. Not because she was actually jealous but because she needed an excuse to fight someone. 

Her dad beat her around a fair amount in New York City too because she had a habit of talking back. 

She probably lived in the Bronx around Flatbush Avenue. 

In this AU, Buck is a girl too so Buck is the one that found her and invited her to stay at the bar. She would sweep floors and act as bartender sometimes. She often raked in tips because she liked to flirt with customers. 

On that note, VERY flirty. We see this with how she interacts with Cherry. Just loves to make jokes and flirt. 

She met and decided that Tilly!Johnny was her favorite on the way back to the bar one day. She was passing the lot when she saw a group of boys picking on Johnny for being too boyish and a tom boy. She scared them off by throwing rocks and then got Johnny the hell out of there. Later, she brought a little Johnny to her place and got her cleaned up. Giving her some clothes and letting her stay the night. That was how she got involved with the rest of the gang. 

Initially, Dallas really liked Steve as well. They were both loud girls who did a lot of makeup and weren’t the nicest to people at all. They got along really well too. 

Also has a problem with substance abuse. This started back in New York where she would drink to escape from her dad and just continued because she lived in a bar. 

Sylvia is also a friend… maybe more. They both work at Buck’s bar and sometimes when Sylvia is too tired to go home, they’ll spend the night together. 

Dally loves the smokey eye makeup look with the winged eyeliner. If she gets into a fight, she’ll do bright red eyeshadow and won’t even bother cleaning up the bruises. She thinks that they make her look really tough. 

She is a very bad cook and has a hard time cooking for herself and wanting to eat anything besides the food at the bar. If she doesn’t feel like cooking, she’ll just starve, surviving on cheap wine and stale cigarettes. Though she loves a good street taco and wished that Tulsa had more places to get them. 

Absolutely HATES wearing dresses. Her dad and aunt back in NYC forced her to wear them and as soon as she ran away, she started wearing leather and jeans. 

She has curly hair cropped short or keeps it out of the way. It is also consistently messy and greasy  because she neglects to wash it. She hardly uses any product on the curls because she doesn’t really care enough. She has gotten a lot of lip from Steve and Two-Bit for this. 

Besides Johnny, she gets along the best with Ste3ve. They both have the same tendencies with girls, angry, bossy, honest, same type of makeup, brash, etc. Dallas is also the only one that Steve has subconsciously allowed to yell at Ace. 

She also gets along surprisingly well with Two-Bit. They balance each other out with the mean and funny dynamic and the drinking. Two-Bit will spend a lot of time in Buck’s bar drinking and Dallas eventually roped her into pool sharking people with her. 

[destinyc1020]

Did Zendaya make the same trips as Tom? No, she never went to him or visited him when he was working - this is what really shows her true attitude towards Tom. But you, as always, will not answer this question or will deny it

Says the Anon who has conveniently FORGOTTEN that Zendaya has uprooted her whole entire LIFE to go LIVE with TOM in London. 😒🤨

You antis are so transparent. 🙄 Don't y'all get tired?

Btw, women DON'T need to be reciprocating everything the man does. Don't you all know that by now?? 🤔 That's not our job.

Men and women are different. Some of you all need to read "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus", I swear. 🤦🏾‍♀️

Men LOVE to serve. It's not a hardship for them when they really love you. In fact, it brings them GREAT pleasure.

Women love to receive. It's our love language. It's what makes US feel loved and secure.

Men feel loved and appreciated when what they're doing makes YOU happy, and you appreciate it. Try it out! I bet you, you will have a man eating out of the palm of your hand lol. 😄 (A GOOD man who was raised well... not some woman-hating, basement-dweller man)

A man shows you how much he loves you by DOING. Women show a man how much she loves him by actively and openly RECEIVING (no pun intended lol 🤭) what he's offering.

Obviously, there's some overlap from time to time (a man can receive, and a woman can give), but typically, this is all very instinctual. You don't have to always be trying to one up a man or give back.

Also, Z HAS visited Tom on his sets. She was there in Canada for CW filming. Check the receipts. She was there in NYC when he was filming TCR. She was right there several nights for his R&J play.

The other films (Cherry, Uncharted, etc) they were broken up, so of course she wouldn't be there. But the others, she's been there!!

Like what on earth are you even talking about? 🥴🥴

Tom and Z have had a VERY good balance at showing love for each other. Just because you haven't been keeping up with the tea over the years, it doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. 🤨

[freedelusionshere]

Is Carmy actually broke, though?

I read online CDCs in NYC in fine dining can make upwards of $100K. Now, I do think Chef David probably is a low-baller who thinks it's a "privilege" to work for him, and housing in NYC is extremely expensive, but Carmy could've lived in a flat with roommates for all we know.

In Chicago Carmy lives in a very basic way. I'm sure his flat isn't cheap at all, but he's obsessed with his job, and he has spent money on things like selvage jeans (which he immediately starts selling to buy beef) and expensive ingredients on occasion, and we see him eating PBJ at home in S1 and his furniture looks used, no decor, etc. Which could be a carry-over from how he lived in NYC, or, he wasn't planning on putting down roots at first?

Carmy is also bad with math, but I don't think Cousin Michelle and Stevie are. They make a point of showing Stevie commenting on this in Fishes when talking to the Faks trying to scam him, and Michelle has invested in restaurants suggesting she's not hurting for cash.

So, does Carmy have money stashed away? What do you all think?

Would it be bad if he has his personal money invested somewhere and didn't put it all immediately into The Beef given that he inherited it without being asked, was unsure of how bad its finances really were, has never led a restaurant before, and his family all told him out of the gate it would fail immediately and that he should sell it? He also kind of chastises Nat for lending money to Mikey as well.

Keep in mind, he was on deferred pay the whole time as well, just like Syd was, because she tells her dad as much.

I don't think Carmy's personal finances really come up, but maybe I missed something? I assumed he signed the partnership agreement, but Cicero is the one on the hook for the money, right? Cicero gave Mikey all that money and Mikey hid it rather than use it and left it for Carmy. Nat and Cicero encourage Syd to sign it. Is it not fully executed until she signs it? Does this leave Cicero on the hook fully if The Bear fails?

Storer said Mikey was telling the truth to Jimmy about wanting to franchise, and that he wanted to start it with Carmy before he died. But he hid the money away and never told Carmy. Mikey was an addict and also sealing it in the tomato cans feels totally like Mikey's sense of humor. But never said a word about it to Carmy, just wrote him the note and told only him where the money was.

[4suitedplayingcard]

Various Punch Out Headcanons I have that I felt the need to share or else my brain would explode :p

All of the boxers (who didn't originally live in New York) pretty much just live in hell NY now cuz of their boxing career. They do visit their families during vacation and all that, but for the most part, they just stay in New York.

Piston Hondo finds it hard to make friends with people who are around the same age as him and younger because he finds them harder to understand/relate to (and also a bit more judgemental), so he mostly hangs out w/ people who are much older than him, with the only exception being Great Tiger.

King Hippo thinks that most beds are uncomfortable and will sleep pretty much anywhere except on a bed. On the floor, the couch, a pile of leaves, a comically small pillow, etc etc.

Aran Ryan has a bad habit of eating non edible objects out of intrusive thinking (and also spite sometimes), he's eaten things ranging from twigs to hand sanitizer to cigarette butts and has been sent to the hospital a couple of times because of it.

Don Flamenco is obsessed with skincare, mostly due to the fact that he looks like a middle aged man with his toupee off. The second he gets his paycheck, he immediately spends most of it on various scrubs and lotions. He even almost went bankrupt on numerous occasions because of it

Bear Hugger had been friends with Ms. Bear even since he was 12 years old. He found her all alone in the forest on a snowy day when she was a baby and his parents agreed to keep her until they find her a new home (which obviously didn't work out)

Super Macho Man is a nepo baby. His mother was a movie actor while his father was also a heavyweight boxer, which caused him to get a lot of attention from not only his peers at school, but also media outlets too.

Glass Joe has terrible eyesight and mostly uses contact lenses wherever he goes, though he does occasionally wear glasses sometimes (mostly at home or whenever he's run out of contacts).

Bald Bull is VERY reluctant to touch, even the slightest little bump in can cause him to flip out. He only makes this exception to people who are super close to him, but even then, he doesn't want any physical contact for too long or he’ll start to lose it.

Even though Von Kaiser wasn't actually apart of a war, he was enrolled in a boot camp for a few years of his life. It was hell and he still has nightmares about it to this day…

No matter how much sleep he gets, Great Tiger usually ends up sleepy at some point during the day. He's tried every to get him to sleep better, drinking warm milk, staying away from electronics an hour before bed, taking melatonin, but he still ends up tired in the middle of the day sometimes and it drives him mad.

Y'know those scientist that you see in Soda Popinski’s title defense slideshow? Well those are kind of his dads. He was left on the doorsteps of a lab when he was a baby, and all of the people in the facility have been taking care of him ever since.

Disco Kid has a brother a few months younger than him who used to be the boxer known as Kid Quick. They both started Boxing at around 18, but Kid Quick ended up quitting early in his career to focus on something more mundane. (Yea ik I made a lil shitpost drawing a few weeks ago about Kid Quick being pre-transition Disco Kid but shhhh-)

Mr. Sandman is the only boxer in the entire organization that's not only married, but also has a kid. He has a wife named Alena and a daughter named Chelsea, they all live with Sandman in NYC. :)

[hms-no-fun]

What movie would you suggest to someone who just hasn't seen that many movies?

oh jeez, only one? that's tough...

my girlfriend just came up behind me, read this post, and said "boss baby." i don't know if i agree with her sentiment but i'm including it for posterity.

thing is, if it was just the two of us in a room and you asked me this question, i'd respond by asking you more questions. what are some movies you have seen? what have you liked, what haven't you liked? what are your interests? what kinds of experiences do you crave? how do you feel about modern art? are you a pervert? can you handle blood? what's a feeling you're nostalgic for? you know, normal person questions. the more straightforward approach would be like, what are your favorite genres? but i think that's a lot less useful than folks have been led to believe because like, what if your response is "scifi?" what kind of science fiction are we talking about here? could be 70s hard scifi, could be 2000s action-oriented scifi, could run the gamut from trek to wars etc etc. i think it's more fun to try to find something personal you can relate a film to in an abstract sense.

but idk, maybe that's too cerebral! the mood i'm in right now, i might say the 2007 tony gilroy film Michael Clayton. it's a sort of corporate espionage thriller about a monsanto-esque agrotech company trying to hide evidence of the health risks caused by its chemicals. it is also a lovecraftian horror about monstrous amorphous entities of capital treating human beings as disposable. it's one of my favorite movies ever.

maybe the question is, what kind of experience are you looking to have?

if you're looking to have a good time, why not shane black's The Nice Guys? great buddy cop comedy with ryan gosling and russell crowe set in 70s LA about a murdered porn star's potential connection with a corrupt automotive industry advocate in government. hilarious script, it just gets funnier every time you watch it. watch this brief scene and if it makes you laugh you'll love this flick.

if you're looking to have a bad time, fuck it, jump in the deep end, watch david lynch's Mulholland Drive. it's about an amnesiac who survived a car crash and a recent transplant to LA trying to figure out what happened to her that she lost her memory, and then some other stuff happens. it's brilliant and you may very well not get it and that's okay. not getting david lynch the first time you watch one of his movies is a rite of passage. the joy of his cinema is that it grows as you grow, and it always has something new to say when you come back to it. but it also may very well not be your thing, and that's cool too! at least you learned something about yourself

if you just want a classic kinda action movie, you could do a lot worse than The Taking of Pelham 123, a 70s heist film about a group of guys hijacking a subway car in NYC. it is the most new york movie ever made, just a bunch of sweaty middle aged dudes at work annoyed that they have to deal with this hostage situation AND run a subway at the same time. there's some guys who are racist in it but it is not a racist film.

want to get away from america into the world of pretentious art movies? check out krzysztof kieslowski's Three Colors: Blue, an anti-tragedy about a woman who loses her entire family in a car crash and decides to isolate from reality until she dies, but who cannot help but to be already living in a society where other human beings exist and notice her and want to help her. it's one of my favorite movies, it is profoundly beautiful and moving and will hit especially hard if you've ever felt loss but still had to keep on living anyway.

i could go on, but i gotta eat dinner. i think what i'd recommend most is that you pick a movie to watch, watch it, and then pick another movie to watch, and then another, and then keep doing that. the easiest way to watch more movies is to watch more movies, and part of the fun is abandoning trepidation and just picking something out of the blue to give a shot. fuck it, why not? there are no wrong answers.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Anyone have suggestions on what to do or places to eat in London? I’m down next week for the 80th celebrations and wanting to see more than just the usual suspects if you know what I mean? Also nothing too $$$$ as I live by myself with one wage so want to keep costs low if possible.

Some earlier recommendations were shared here.

I've heard really good things about the Churchill War Rooms so if WW2 history is your thing, that might be worth checking out for the timeliness. (Definitely get your tickets early ahead of time, though.)

I celebrated my 29th birthday in London when I was there and pretty much everyone I talked to about where to go for a special dinner said to go to the restaurant at the National Portrait Gallery, the Portrait Restaurant. It's a little pricey, but the views are great, the food and drink was amazing. Reservations are recommended, and then afterwards you can browse the art!

The Washington Post food critic, Tom Sietsema, did a recap of some restaurants in London back in December 2023. I trust Tom's opinion as much as I do my mother's - he hasn't steered me wrong yet. Here a gift link to his review: https://wapo.st/3YS7rxk but the TL;DR--

The Portrait Restaurant (hey, he liked it too!), $20 - $50ish

Blacklock (for a Sunday roast), $20 - $40

Landmark London (for afternoon tea), $90

Mountain, $30 - $70

Dishoom (Indian food), $5 - $22

(These are 2023 prices so definitely double-check the websites for current prices.)

Speaking from my own traveling experience, ethnic food (Chinese, Indian, tacquerias, halal, shawarma, etc.) is pretty inexpensive and really good in multicultural diverse cities like London and NYC. I ate at a couple of places in London's Chinatown and everything was fantastic.

As for things to do, I'm always going to recommend museums. Here are my picks based on a few things I've seen on the internet:

Tower of London - always a good time, plus BRF crown jewels

The Victoria & Albert - they have a Cartier tiara exhibition going on now. I saw a video of the exhibit and listen, I'm not a jewelry person but 😍.

The King's Gallery - the Edwardians exhibition just opened and everything I've seen of it is just beautiful and 😍. Queen Alexandra's coronation gown is on display for the first time in decades.

Churchill War Rooms - my one regret from my trip to London; I didn't get to go and I wish I had.

If shopping is more your thing, check out a thrift/antique store. They always have cool stuff that makes for neat souvenirs and mementos, even the ordinary things like teacups or vases.

[earlgrey-teacups]

@cnl0400 (I was going to put this on the thread, but then I realized that I had too many thoughts so...)

Let's talk about Lilith Obey Me!

(more under cut, I'll stick to the highlights though)

Background: In my view of OM! the CR/Devildom was basically on a different timeline than the human world. Prior to the exchange program (which probably would have been in the works for a while to get the CR on board), both the CR and the Devildom had the years move by faster. This is how you get the brothers being 5000+ years old, but anime still exists. Anyway, all this to say...

Lilith met her lover in NYC during Prohibition! Specifically, in a speakeasy. Her lover, who I've decided to make a woman named Lynn, was one of the bartenders working that night. They immediately hit it off and started dating soon after.

Lilith told Lynn about the angel thing relatively early in the relationship, which Lynn was cool with. Though when her brothers asked, Lilith lied and said she never told her anything about it.

Speaking of, when the brothers found out, Lilith lied and said it was a man, so she could keep her relationship private. After seeing this post, I loved the idea of Lilith being secretly discontent with the CR and viewing her lover as a sense of freedom. It just adds so much to her character.

Well, the brothers believe her, and Lucifer wants to meet her """boyfriend""", so she has to enlist the help of Adam, a friend of Lynn's and a fellow bartender (I also made him one of Asmo's first human lovers, but that's besides the point).

Lucifer believes Lilith, but he lets it slip to Micheal that she's seeing someone. Micheal, well aware of Lilith's silent rebellion, immediately thinks that it's a human, so he makes Raphael find out.

Raphael, who I like to imagine had a younger brother (Gabriel) who also fell for a human, which is what made it a taboo in the first place, hoped that it wasn't the case. But, when he followed Lilith to the human world, he saw her flirting with Lynn.

Ultimately, he told Michael about his findings, and unfortunately, the Big Man™ overheard. Wanting to get rid of Lilith, He made Raphael poison Lynn. Raphael tried to get out of it, and Michael tried to convince Him to do something less rash, but He was having none of it. He wanted Lilith gone.

So, Raphael poisoned Lynn with a magical poison, which would kill anyone within 2 weeks. However, since Lynn ended up basically promising her soul to the reaper (13), the poison worked slower. The downside was it was becoming more and more painful to do anything.

Lilith, desperate, went to Gabriel for help. Gabriel's lover naturally got hit with an awful illness, and when he found out, he took the Forbidden Fruit and saved them. His lover lived, but when the CR authority found out, he got put on house arrest. Lilith assumed that she would get the same fate; at worse, her titles would be stripped and she would fall.

After that, she got the FF and gave some to Lynn. Lynn at first rejected the idea, saying that she would become one of 13's butterflies, and she just wanted it to be over with. But Lilith, needing her link to freedom, urged her to. To convince her, Lilith eats the fruit with her.

It cures Lynn, but when Lilith eats the fruit, she becomes more powerful (I think of Lilith as a high ranking angel), and she then asks Lynn to take an Oath with her (basically an angelic pact) in order to try and put her new found power onto her. Lynn accepts, thinking that this was Lilith's way of saying "we're married now".

It takes a while for anyone to notice (Lilith obviously isn't saying shit, and Raphael doesn't want to check), but eventually, it gets out. Lilith goes to trial, she takes blame for everything, expecting that she would stay alive at least.

But, obviously, she doesn't. The war breaks out, Lilith dies, etc...

[Quick note on death: I imagine Diavolo having to clear with 13 if it was okay to revive Lilith, since reviving the dead is a complicated thing, and 13 just said she would handle it. In my version, Lilith reincarnated into an adult and she has all of her memories. Obviously can get into it if you ask.]

When an angel with an Oath dies, all of the angels powers go to the human they bonded with. As a result, Lynn became ridiculously magically powerful. Another thing is that the Oath's powers can transfer to people that the human considers family.

Now, Lynn doesn't really have any bio relatives left, but she thinks of my MC's great grandmother (Gwyneth) as a sister. So, she takes some of the powers. On top of that, Gwyneth was already an accomplished sorcerer, so all of her powers increased tenfold.

(To explain the angel blood, I decided to have Gwyneth get with a fallen angel, which would be Uriel. I also made Uriel kill Lilith, and the guilt just got to him so he went AWOL, but that's neither here or there.)

Because of that, all of Gwyneth's descendents have Lilith powers (and angel blood)! 13 decided to combine both human!Lilith and Lynn's souls and distributes them among all the bio descendants, making them even better in magic. This comes with the added benefit of being able to see Lilith in dreams, and just talk to her for advice and whatnot.

My MC would abuse this so much, she became the most connected to Lilith, being able to summon her in very specific conditions.

If you have anymore questions, I'd be happy to answer them. This is more like backstory anyway lol

[hannahncounting]

9:30AM

06-16-2025

NYC

~

🍼Postpartum life

I am definitely drained, mentally and physically. I am 2 weeks postpartum and just starting to feel better physically. I'm working things out when it comes to cooking, cleaning and managing everyone's schedules. I have two other kids 2 & 4 years old and they are definitely a handful already. Did I mention I only have boys. Lol. Now I have 3 boy that are rambunctious and lively, happy thankfully.

🕦Time for self-care?

Being completely honest, I have barely anytime for self care. Showers are a luxury, Doing my hair is a luxury and getting to cut my nails is a luxury. A luxury that I don't get to indulge in much. My day is full of cleaning up little messes, cooking 3 different things for each meal (because we all want something different), breastfeeding, setting up activities, being a referee, etc.

I started to take care of myself more. I definitely fell into a bit of a depression because of being overwhelmed and having negative moments during my pregnancy with my husband and family. Not diving too deep into it now, I managed to understand that I cannot neglect myself. I need to feel good, I need to be healthy and I want to look good for myself. So, slowly but surely I am working in certain self-care things I can do for myself. Doing my hair (straightening, oiling), doing my brows, nails, shaving (which what hard being super pregnant) and changing eating habits, and more.

It feels good to do right by myself.

📋TO-DO TODAY

I woke up fairly early today since my husband is starting work again today after being on paternity leave to help with our newborn.

I got my grocery order and breastfed.

My new baby boy "Little Roc", has another appointment today to check ensure his weight gain is on track.

So later on this afternoon:

Appointment for baby

I also got a baby basket full of items from my in-laws so after that:

Open baby presents!

(My husband wants to do that together. Cute lol)

My two other kids are with my mom having grandma time.)

So this will give me time to plan some stuff:

Make a daily routine

Start up homeschooling again

Work on some meal prepping for dinner(s)

I have so many other things that has to get ordered for my kids and myself so later:

Go over some necessities with my husband

See you all in the next post. :) <3

I'll be posting pictures of my day on instagram!

DonT forget to follow me there @hannahncounting

⬇️

https://www.instagram.com/hannahncounting?igsh=M29yc2Y5ZHFrcnBt&utm_source=qr

[avengxrz]

OKAY HI… first time requesting for bucky, kinda nervous 🥹 but actually, i have different tropes for you to choose from (if you wanna write any of them, completely up to you ofcc!!) 🩷

- congressman bucky x underground artist!reader

basically (long one) reader/she was in new orleans during summer break. shes like freshly 21 in tfatws, making friends with bucky bc of how much she opened and played at the bar (the bar in tfatws yk?? am i making sense 💔) and how much he was there, even with yori. anyway, so shes actually a college student. med, etc, you choose, and she actually lives in nyc. SO, when hes a congressman, they somehow bump into each other. i JUST got this idea and you do what you want with it 😔 but then word gets out after she leaves his place disheveled… 😶‍🌫️… and tabloids are all over it. at least she can pay her college tuition for her last few years? can be angst, fluff, smut, idc, you eat every trope up. im lowkey proud of this one

- congressman bucky x pr manager!reader

in my opinion, not done nearly enough bc theyre always sass and stand on business. she can humble him with a glare and a teasing finger to his chest. “this worrying issue is very… worrying” yeah he definitely needs a pr manager cuz wtf. sometimes hes stubborn and doesnt take her opinion, until the void happens and shes the first person he goes to. or we scratch the entirety of thunderbolts and rewind to where it was just him campaigning and they get into some argument or whatever about literally anything.

- tfawts bucky x baker!reader

buckys still adjusting. and obviously having limitations set by the literal government of what he can and cant do under a shitty therapist’s supervision, he finds something close to quiet when he finds a small bakery. hidden almost, brand new from the smell of fresh paint on the wall, cozy but not overwhelming. shes his usual. and it gets messy when he leaves, starts the whole congressman thing (i feel like we see a pattern, im sorry 😞) until it gets too intimate. whether that’s physically or emotionally or BOTH (oh, death of me) and theyre still on a situationship. end the oneshot how you will bc ive run out of ideas.

- post catws!bucky x ex-hydra agent!reader

okay, so she was basically also experimented on. she finds him like if he wanted to go and take down bases bc she wasnt in cryo since shes not a super soldier (so she knows most things), just messed up into some sick doll for them. he doesnt talk much, and she understands. and they genuinely bond. she helps him… breathe. until something goes wrong. he gets arrested (civil war) the day after they made it up—no official names since neither of them are ready enough for that, but close to it. just enough to grasp at and be assured. and then he goes into wakanda. BLIPS. CONGRESSMAN. AVENGER?? oh good LORD 😶‍🌫️ idk this is me spiraling thinking about everything after post-catws. you can honestly just do a fluff blurb where theyre somewhat content in romania and thats ITTT.

- avenger/thunderbolt!bucky x assistant/avenger!reader

reminds me of the yn wp fics BUT i havent seen any when shes an assistant instead of an avenger, but eh, do as you will. shes just pure nice. pure help. then she gets hurt. maybe if shes an assistant, some mission went sideways and somehow got to her, or an avenger, she was ON the mission. anyway, ticks him tf off and gets overly protective like she cant take care of himself. even yelena, whos usually upfront, just backs off with a middle finger raised sometimes, her brows up as if to tell reader ‘told you’, and ava smirking and walking away. even if theyre ALL concerned. but john is just like wtf and bob is like genuinely worried, and alexei is pure brainrot. (kinda feels like what we destroy to be free mixed with call it what it was).

girl i ran out of ideas 💔 and ofc you dont have to do any of these, i was just scrolling on tiktok and started thinking. HAVE A LOVELY DAY !!

- feralgremlingf 😞 (ive been in your inbox a lot ill stop now i swear. im sorry lilian 😓😓😓)

hi!! first of all, please never apologize for being in my inbox. i LOVED reading all of this 😭 you're genuinely feeding me with these tropes and ideas and i’m so grateful. you’re not annoying at all, you’re actually making my day brighter. second, i am one hundred percent saving this message to reread whenever i need serotonin. congressman bucky? artist reader? ex-hydra? situationship mess? emotional damage? you're giving me everything i love.

i’m actually planning to write a congressman!bucky fic at some point because politics is my field. i’m a political science major and i’ve been dying to write something that mixes real-world tension with that kind of emotional push-and-pull.

i don’t live in the US though, so i’ll definitely need to study how the government works over there. like how congressmen campaign, what their day-to-day looks like, the difference between federal and state systems, and how media and scandals are handled. i really want it to feel grounded but still fun and dramatic.

also, side note, i would love to get to know you more! you’re clearly so creative and your energy is the kind that makes people excited to create. please never hold back when you have ideas, you’re inspiring fr. thank you again for trusting me with this message and i hope your day has been lovely too 💗

— lilian (still not over the idea of congressman bucky with his tie askew and reader in his apartment while the tabloids go crazy)

[vitospaghetta]

How do you imagine Leon's place to look like and where do you think he lives? Some flat?

Also alaooo what do you think he does in his free time?

You have no idea how much thought I've put into this over the years.

Let me preface this with the fact that I'm specifically talking about original continuity Leon post-RE6 here, where he's a seasoned adult and has been in his career field for a while.

Leon more-than-likely lives in D.C. (he could also live in VA or MD but he strikes me as the kinda guy who would rather eat glass than commute, especially with D.C. traffic being absolute bullshit) in an apartment somewhere in the city.

As a federal agent, he makes a salary, which is something that is determined by things like the amount responsibility you have within the agency, your credentials/experience, your skillset, etc. Given his role and responsibilities within the D.S.O., he's easily a top earner. The top earners within the FBI make $153,000 annually, but it looks like top earners within the CIA can make more — like with all things, every agency is different. The D.S.O. obviously isn't a real agency, but as one that is held above all others (as far as authority within the criminal justice system is concerned), Leon probably receives a pretty cushy salary. Around $200,000 annually, easy. Income tax would fuck him over, but he'd still walk away with a reasonable amount per month to afford a $4,000+ per month apartment or to buy one and pay off a mortgage.

He can easily afford a one or two bedroom apartment in the city is what I'm saying. And I mean a nice apartment. We're talking granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, washer and dryer in-unit, floor-to-ceiling windows, in a modern building in a nice area of the city. An area that consists entirely of nice apartment buildings like the one he lives in. There's actually an area just outside of NYC that reminds me of the kinda area I can see him living in. I was there to take the ferry over into the city for a memorial/organ donation event I was attending last year.

The pics don't exactly encapsulate the full vibe, and these apartments probably go for millions due to the proximity to the city and being right off the Hudson, but it's quiet, safe, and filled with sporty people. Lots of folks walking dogs, jogging after work hours, and a sense of community amongst people that seemingly have their shit together.

He strikes me as the type to have a two bedroom apartment just for an office that he's hardly ever in. He'd want to live in a building that has a gym as an amenity because it's easier than hoofing it to a gym elsewhere, and a garage for him to put his car and the crotch rocket he's currently mourning courtesy of Maria.

As for the apartment's interior, I feel like it would completely lack personality or cluttered charm. There's a level of almost sterility to it, in that it's devoid of knick-knacks, personal photos, and encompasses a strong aesthetic of maturity. Everything in it is nice. There's tasteful artwork on the walls, and it's furnished with well-made and sometimes expensive furniture and appliances, because, as a childless adult, if Leon's going to spend money on only himself, he's going to spend it well. You get what you pay for, after all. There are obviously some traces of Leon's personality strewn about — skin care products in the bathroom, boots and leather jackets by the door, some books, laundry crumpled at the foot of his bed and piled by the washer/dryer, maybe a single sarcastic coffee mug somewhere in the cabinet — but there's no novelty.

Due to his constant bouncing around, he isn't home enough to put too much effort into it, and he hasn't had the luxury of certainty or normalcy in so long that all he wants out of his home is for it to look nice and be a comfortable place to sleep. He appreciates coming home to a place that is his, but it doesn't need to be a display of everything he's ever enjoyed. Even when he is home, he strikes me as the type to start going stir crazy when he sits for too long. The most amount of time he probably ever spent at home was when he was self-isolating and hitting the bottle really hard. There's also the generational element of Gen-X'ers being extremely lowkey about shit.

As far as what Leon does in his free time, I feel like he enjoys doing things that are out of the house due to the aforementioned inability to stay alone with his thoughts for too long. The man is constantly trying to distract himself to place distance between himself and his trauma, so where he might have been able to sit and watch a movie alone before, he struggles to now.

Leon's very extroverted, likable, and adaptable, so he probably enjoys being around other people, even if he's not actively talking to them. Though he appreciates silence as well, when he's kicking things around in his head and is trying to find some semblance of peace and a means to calm the noise. He might get a coffee at a shop right by his apartment where he's a regular and everyone knows him by name, or go for a run, or go shopping. Maybe he tries to make plans with those he cares about to go out for dinner, like he did with Claire in Infinite Darkness. Maybe he tries to catch a good sunset over the Potomac River. He goes to the gym, he rides his motorcycle around the city or takes a scenic route on the outskirts just for the hell of it, he meets up with a fellow agent and they do shots at his favorite bar.

I don't think he has hobbies, as in crafting or gaming or being too involved in any specific interests, but everything he does is fueled by his love of people, his appreciation for what good he has in his life, and his need for escape.

[iamfuckingsorry]

well today sure has been a day.

turns out there's some kind of local holiday in the municipality my work is located in (not in the place /I/ live in mind, and they're the same town, it's like a local holiday in Brooklyn but not the rest of NYC or something). no one told me and it's marked as a working day on the internship schedule i got from the company. so i got up at 6.30, took the tram, got to the bus stop and there's no people i recognize there (no other interns, not the old ladies that take the same bus, not the two chinese kids that take the bus to school), no bus comes for 20 mins including the buses that usually go every 10-15, so i check the schedule... "28th of april, holiday schedule". which means one bus at 11 and one bus at 8 pm. great. i do start getting a bit suspicions but like, the trams were running as normal, no one said anything and i even specifically talked to several people at work about this week having "three days" (labour day plus the day after are off work) and something about "this being a problem for monday" and no one reacted, and it /is/ marked as a working day on my personal calender. so i take a cab to work because id just rather pay than miss work. well i get to work and wouldn't you know, it's closed. cool. it's like 8.30 am and the bus home goes at 11, and the company is in like an industrial area with no other connections (there is another bus line but it only runs on working days). so i walk the 70 or so mins to the closest metro instead - which is actually kinda cool i guess, now i know you can walk all the way there without actually walking on the road (tho i did have to walk on bike paths and also like through a weird sketchy forest area right next to the highway lol). i spent some time panicking over what to do etc so it's like 10 am now. next metro goes at 10.3å because it's like the end of the line and the middle of the day. finally get back home at around 11.40 (my roomie who is doing his internship at the same company is happily cooking breakfast...), microwave my lunch box, start watching uk masterchef professionals while i eat... And the lights go out.

So I take a nap (the electricity here is like that sometimes and also our upstairs neighbour is renovating his flat in his own without any professionals involved), and when I wake up an hour later the electricity is still not back on, so I go back to sleep, then I get woken up by my flatmates saying they were gonna go to the park to try and get reception... check my phone and no reception for me either... i charge my phone a bit through my laptop (was at 30% before), eventually decide to go out reception hunting too and i tune in the national radio on my phone at the same time

And turns out the electricity is down in all of Spain and from what I can understand also Portugal 🫠 and i normally live in a country very close to russia so my first reaction was, of course, "fuck that's a /big/ sabotage"

so ngl, that was a bit scary lol, especially since i currently dont really have any food that can be eaten without heating it up in some way and of course out stove/oven is electric (i do have my camping stove but that feels very last resort) (and we did have running water throughout all of this)

Finally got the power back up now at 9 pm, though there's still parts of the city without power from what I can see

And I still dunno if I'm working tomorrow or not, I'd assume so but there's a national emergency and people are being asked to not travel unless necessary and use as little electricity as possible (last info i saw we were running on about 1/5 capacity), so... it would also make sense for people to stay home since we're not in any way an essential business?

[mangle-my-mind]

I MUST TALK ABOUT HOW GREAT TONIGHT WAS

So I didn't have plans today (snowy NYC etc) so I went on theatr to see if any Broadway tickets were being sold last-minute, and there was a ticket for Will Butler + the Sister Squares at Joe's Pub, which I didn't know about. Of course the setlist would have Stereophonic songs, and some of the cast was likely to be there. I got the ticket for $20, got dolled up, spent a few hours roaming the city, and then went to the show!

The woman who sold it to me was so nice and a huge Stereophonic AND Swept Away superfan. Her friend was really cool, too, and we had a great chat before the show. The ticket was LITERALLY RIGHT BY THE STAGE. I know Joe's Pub is small so I would've been happy anywhere, but RIGHT UNDER THE BAND'S NOSES OMG

The set was amazing! The Stereophonic songs were smashes ofc, and the Sister Squares music (which I'd only heard earlier today in preparation) was really really good. Will Butler is a Performer(TM).

Then Tom Pecinka (who was in the audience, as was Chris Stack) came onstage to do Masquerade. I was LIVING. Stereophonic is ALIVE AND WELL AND LIVING IN NEW YORK

The show ended and I had a great chat with a man next to me, who is also a Stereophonic and Swept Away fan. It was so great to fangirl over these shows with others, especially Swept Away 😭 Then Will Butler came back onstage to prep the instruments for his later set, and I had him sign my Stereophonic CD (bc a girl is always prepared!) and I made him laugh and offered him my fries that I ordered and didn't eat, and generally just had a really great unexpectedly eventful day!

[howwelldoyouknowyourmoon]

Once a person bought into Moon as Messiah they had to accept his “law of indemnity, Cain/Abel, servant of servant, etc.” It was enslavement.

RE: “No, the Moons did not steal anything. Things were given to them freely by members.”

Oh yes the Moons did. They set up a cult where members were terrorized into giving up their God given and national human rights. They were told that they would lose their soul and be damned to hell, tortured by Satan and unable to ever stand before God if they did not follow Moon. Following Moon meant following his teaching of Cain/Abel and indemnity.

All leaders were Abels, all members were Cain. Through the practice of indemnity, meted out by leaders, members lived in a constant state of what Moon called ‘the Servant of Servants position’. A servant of servants is so low as to have zero rights because it is a position lower then a slave. This was the ‘formula course’ set up by Moon to give members a way to indemnify the fall of man and “return to God, all people, material wealth and all things.” No one could return to God without going this formula course.

Based on that theology all members had to do what they were told to do by their Abel leader (who got his or her directions directly from Moon himself) or face a life of eternal suffering in hell with no hope of ever being called a child of God.

Once a person bought into Moon as Messiah they had to accept this law of indemnity, Cain/Abel, servant of servant position absolutely.

I see NO freedom in that total mind fuck theology.

Moon’s speeches are full of examples of him saying that if we even took one penny for personal use from monies we gained through fund raising we would sufferer eternal damnation. And also that we had no rights to money earned in business because we had to bring it all back to God (meaning himself) so it could be taken from the Satanic world and be restored back to God (again, meaning Moon himself). He even went so far as to tell us that we should feel ashamed to even eat because it took money away from ‘God’s providence’. And so we were fed very little.

I worked, without pay, at Dilly Deli Delicatessen, a sandwich shop owned by Bo Hi Pak in a Maryland Mall “without pay of any kind” because I was told it was my mission. A mission is something a servant of servant is duty bound to do without pay and without complaint. I worked without pay of any kind for Original World Products in NY, Golden Gate Seafood in California, Christian Bernard’s in NYC, and WFWP in Boston. And that doesn’t even touch on all the fundraising I was forced to do over the years as my duty to Moon. I say forced fund raising because even when I cried and begged not to have to do it I was told I had no choice. It was excruciating for me to fund raise. At the time all I knew was that I was in constant pain – but not why I was in so much pain. But now I know, I had Multiple Sclerosis. I cried almost every day while fundraising because I FUCKING HURT!

No one knew I had MS back then. But no one had an ounce of mercy when I begged not to have to fund raise either. I was labeled “Cain”, which translated into being on “Satan’s side” and therefore a trouble maker. I was told that I was not in pain at all – but that Satan and evil spirits were invading me to stop me from doing my mission.

So you are sadly mistaken when you say no one was forced to give money to the Moons.  

This is not just my story, but the story of countless members. We all had to go the formula course of servant of servant and follow the Cain/Abel formula in order to have even a meager chance of a relationship with God and to “separate from Satan.”

That, my friend, is mind control. That, my friend, is enslavement. That, my friend, is giving – but NOT giving freely.

Linda Feher

Indemnity is a Moon Trap

The Four Fallen Natures of the Divine Principle are used as a means of controlling members.

Charismatic Authority (authority is not the same as power)

The Frightening Power of Obedience to Authority

The concept of original sin seems to have been developed about 200 years after Jesus by Irenaeus and later by St Augustine.

_________________________________________

Giving or Stealing

Sorry to hear about your problem with MS, Linda.  One of my unpleasant church experiences was when I injured my leg.  I suspect it was fractured, or a very bad sprain. I was expected to carry on as normal until I just flat out said no.

As far as blind obedience, it probably depends on the member’s personality.  I know some members who were so guilt ridden that they would obsessively do what their central figure told them to do, and then wonder why their life did not get better.

I guess I had some common sense, and I guess that is why I could not stay in the church.  I always thought of myself as a volunteer.  Was I the only one who thought that way?

One moment I will always remember was when I refused a position my central figure offered to me.  Do you know Sung Sang Lee?  The little Napoleon?  I simply told him I could not accept the position because I could not unite with him.  He gave me a hard look, and never mentioned it again.

May be why I never became a big shot leader.

Pat Kilgore

_________________________________________

Pat Kilgore… loved your response! Love your spunk!

You had some sense of reality that I lacked. Most people in my center and who I worked with over the years were like me. I didn’t meet anyone like you till I married my husband. He was a real rebel! He helped me grow a backbone to replace my wishbone.

One of my prouder moments as a new member was when I lived in the Baltimore center with Mike Jenkins as my Abel figure. He was a real control freak, made all the more insufferable by his position as God/Abel.

One day I had gotten out of the fund raising van and gone back into the center because of an urgent female issue.

When he saw me come back in he lit into me, demanding to know why I had come back in. He was yelling at me and backed me up to the sofa as he did so. I flopped down, feeling quite cornered.

He called me names and yelled about how Cain I was being. At some point he raised his hand to hit me. (OK, this is where my pride kicks in, and I can laugh at the memory of it all)

As soon as his hand went into the air, I crossed my legs, aimed my foot at his crotch, and looked from my aimed foot, to his crotch, to his face and back again.

If he had hit me I would have nailed him in his balls and he knew it. Maybe I really was Cain! heeheehee

He looked so freaken shocked! He lowered his hand and finally asked me why I had come back in. I told him I had my period and needed to take care of it.

He looked defeated and let me go.

God it was great to have stood up to him like that.

There was another member who was so afraid of Jenkins that he used to tell me he felt like Jenkins was “stalking him”. Jenkins would constantly demand to know what we were thinking, so he could judge whether of not we were “centered” or invaded by evil spirits. This particular brother was a kind soul and could not cope with that level of confrontation/control/harassment/threat.  So he called the Korean leader above Jenkins to report what he felt was extremely threatening behavior. Nothing came of it. Jenkins, if anything, became more threatening and controlling when he got the report.

Thanks for your response

warm regards

Linda Feher