#and am back in bed
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God I love Keigo keep thinking about how clingy he is when his schedule actually allows him time to be home with me and especially on days like today where my period makes me feel sick he’s glued to me and the bed it’s the only time in his life he’s okay with doing absolutely nothing all day bc in his mind he’s “taking care of me so that is doing something important and productive” 💗
#cam speaks#been fighting for my life today I have the second day of my period#and I’m supposed to go to a play tonight but idk if that’s happening :(#I almost had a meltdown in the grocery store just from how bleh I feel#and am back in bed#BUT I have been inspired to write period sex keigo fic that will probs be out next week hehehe#tomorrow I’m going with my friend to her parents house for her sisters bday#then the next day were going to our friend’s apartment!!!#which I’m SO EXCITED FOR#then Sunday I work and we have a big event happening that morning#busy busy so I’m glad today I could just rest up#cawks / camgo
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*about any given drawing* cranking the saturation slider will fix this
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#itafushi#if u count this 0.7 of a megu as itfs ig#ANYWAY HI SORRY IM LIKE DIES but fear not i am actually lives#between artblock and job and attempting to have a social life im exhausted Always but we persist! she said wracked w anxiety and guilt#capitalism got me BAD this leaving the house stuff and waking up early stuff and going to bed before midnight stuff got hands#im also like. rly anxious posting this i feel like its not Enough of a draws to justify the break bc im like insane#convinced every1 hates me for not posting regularly and wld rather i never post again and other delusions#im working on things i am going so slowly it makes me want to crawl out of my skin but i am working on things!!!#anyway im sorry its just sketchy im sorry my render still looks like an identity crisis pls accept my humble offering#before i crawl back in2 my hole and/or run in2 traffic BYE
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Was looking at refs and since Viktor has two different leg braces I was wondering, do we think he wears them simultaneously?? The refs don't perfectly line up perspective-wise so it's hard to tell but parts of the one he wears during the Hexcore scenes look like they could maybe line up with the brace that he wears over his clothes, but also some parts really don't and look like they'd be super uncomfy. Also HOW does he take these on and off. Experts weigh in
#viktor#arcane#ig my assumption would be that he wears both simultaneously cause in the scene where he injects the shimmer#it seems implied that he just threw off his clothes and kept experimenting#so one might assume he was already wearing the smaller one underneath#tho it is a funny image to think of him just being like 'one sec i gotta go all the way home and grab my other brace to do this'#he can take off the back brace too cause hes not wearing it in the scene where he's in the hospital bed and you can see his shoulder#where the strap would be#but that one seems to make even less sense functionality wise#everything looks like its screwed together#or screwed INTO him#but only the top bolts on his spine are i think#in the close ups of his back brace model it looks like theres cushioning underneath the parts of it that cover the rest of his spine#so he can take it off. but HOW#what parts of it unscrew/detatch to pull open and off#does it not do that at all and he just has to shimmy it off his shoulder and all the way down his legs to get it off like a romper#the shape language of the designs are cool but like. tell me how it wooorrkkksss#forgive me if im just dumb and dont know at all how braces work and theres a very simple practical explanation for all this#any king who wants to infodump about mobility aids at me....the floor is yours#something to be said i suppose about the fact that zaunites have crazy prosthetics with wild augmentations that work flawlessly#and piltover's like. idk heres some fucking uncomfortable ass metal. salo gets wheelchair in non ada compliant place#they havent ever needed to adapt to accommodate disabilities etc etc#or maybe artists were just like 'heres a design' and everybody clapped and didnt give it a second thought#and then they just turned off the visibility on the mesh when they didnt need it knowing thered not be a scene where its taken off#dont even wanna THINK about what that rig would look like#like 40 different controllers#soft body and rigid hard surfaces needing to move together....#a cold chill just shot up my spine#<- guy who is only an animator and doesnt know how to rig#forgive the magic wand tool with zero cleanup. i am lazy
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you are coming down with me,
hand in unlovable hand
[prints]
#posting finished art at abysmal times we're so back#anyway I! am going to bed#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#stanford pines#ford pines#grunkle ford#bill cipher#billford#art stuffs tag
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You know how lion cubs will pounce and "attack" their parents and the parents like overdramatically fall over and pretend to be got by them? Dragon Sylus doing that with you (modern day Sylus would do it too lol)
He's lounging around in his hoard, back to the door. It's the perfect time to sneak over aaaand POUNCE! Sylus dramatically topples over and lands with a soft oof against the gold or floor, positioned so you're on top of him
"I gotcha!" you shout triumphantly. And Sylus, who heard you the second you even woke up, just grins and nods, saying, "You got me, kitten."
Does it with the kids, too!!! He could be anywhere doing anything, and suddenly his little dragon(s) are ganging up on him, jumping onto his back and wings, or grabbing his legs. Sylus hitting the ground. Maybe he messes with them back, holding his breath and laying extra still. Just to hear their laughs quiet and feel their little hands shake him worriedly as they quietly go "Papa...?" Only to scare them by grabbing them up and hugging them tight and blowing raspberries against their neck, bringing back the laughter and delight
#i am on a dragon sylus kick lately#i love that creature so much#modern day sylus pretending to be downed by the twins#they pull so many pranks on him he's gotta get them back ya know?#does the same thing where once he goes down he plays dead#(bc those are his kids)#toddler that finds him asleep in bed and pounces him#he grunts awake and opens his eyes and acts like 'oh ive let my guard down around a fierce predator'#shaking rn i need him to interact with kids like this its so fucking cute#sylus#dragon sylus#love and deepspace
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Sometimes at work it's not my place to tell people the things I want to say, and I find I often go home at the end of the rougher days to stand blankly in my shower and tell myself over and over what I wish I could pass on.
This accomplishes very little, and mostly just gives me a tension headache, but through it all I think I've narrowed myself down to a few solid things I'd like to tell people the most.
You can't change people. Not permanently, not for anythig. You can support them, encourage them, love them, give them tools and opportunities and resources, but you can't make them change. They can change themselves if they want to, but they have to want to, and they have to want it for themselves, because they're the only one that's certain to be with them forever.
For better or worse, you make your own choices, and blaming bad choices on others doesn't only work to absolve you of responsibility- it also robs you of control. Because if you say you only did something because I did something, then you arent only shifting blame- you're admitting that you cannot control yourself, that you cannot truly make choices for yourself, that other people can control you- and as long as you truly beleive that, you'll keep facing the same problems over and over. You'll keep letting others dictate your choices, because you'll beleive that they can, and you'll never be free.
White knights on horseback are from fairytales. Nobody can help you if ou're not willing to help yourself. To try, to put the dirty work in, to belive you're worth that effort- Act as though nobody is coming to save you. From a struggle, from pain, from bad relationships, from yourself. And when you do save yourself, because you will, because failure here isn't an option if you want to survive, you'll never find another dragon that can keep you prisoner.
Don't say anything to anyone that you wouldn't want them remembering forever.
Doing the right thing in bad circumstances is hard. It's the hardest thing. But if you make the choice to do that hard thing anyways, despite your fear, you'll go on the rest of your like knowing that you're the sort of person who did something.
The present only seems the hardest because the past I over and the future hasn't happened.
There's so much joy ahead of you, the kind you can't possibly understand until you see it yourself.
The responsibility of consequences is often disguised as the power of permission. "I won't do this if you help me", "I'll work on my anger if you do this for me", "I promised you I'd quit, but can I have just one?". The unspoken question is, "Can it be your fault if this goes badly?"
You cant make someone love you the way you need to be loved. Someone can love you very much and still be bad for you, even if you love them very much in return. Two people can love each other very, very much, and try their very best, and still be wrong for each other.
Sometimes being near to someone changes you, even in good ways, and the people you become don't fit together as well as the people you were.
Caring takes work. Even if it's real. Especially if it's real. And the most important gestures aren't the grand, poetic, songs-and-flowers-and-tears moments; they're getting out of bed even though you don't want to. Paying attention to things you don't enjoy. Scrubbing pans, or opening a window, saying "thank-you", or helping carry groceries into the house. The small things fill the big things- without the small, boring, mediocre things, big things feel hollow.
Thrre is honour and dignity in humble work.
If you are a cruel and spiteful person, then you will find every place you visit to be full of the same cruel, spiteful people. This is not because the world is as cruel as you, but because everywhere you are, you will be disliked. This is the curse that comes with being persistently cruel and spiteful.
If you are a kind and ppsitive person, you will repeatedly encounter kind and positive people, because as they grow familiar with you, they will be happier to have you near. This is the reward of being a kind and positive person.
When splitting paths with loved ones, briefly or forever, aim for your last words to always be "I love you".
#I'm still so young and ignorant#but I wish someone had told ME these things before I had to learn them#And now when shit goes south and everything is over and calm again the same things just roll though my head#Over and over and over#It's like everyone I meet has the same 3 problems and its ruining their lives#I just want to take everyone I meet by the shoulders and shake them#I KNOW why this is happening to you#Do you realize you can be better?#Do you realize you can do it?#Aren't you terrified of wasting your life like this?#*I* want to be happier#*I* used to be so much worse than I am#And I don't have it all figured out#But if we all decide to help ourselves then it'll be that much easier to help each other#Right?#It's so hard to lift dead weight#You need to kick against the waves with me#You need to WANT to float#Do you understand#Ugh it's 6am#This has been your overdramatic midnight ramble#Imma grill me a cheese and go back to bed#Blaurfhgh
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Here comes the Sun himself ☀️
glassless versión

#here comes the sun boogie woogie#hetalia#hws spain#aph spain#antonio fernandez carriedo#gangstalia#I stayed until 2 am drawing him bc. I’ve been struggling w art for the last two days and I was going crazy#I’m like I NEED A DUB’#and I’m happy w this one I think I finally did Antonio justice 😭#i hate his fucking tie#I think this guy hates ties and purposefully chose that one#IT DOESNT MATCH THE OUTFIT GGRRR#or I guess it’s like an accent to his gold belt. idfk#I just know Romano was spinning in his fucking bed after meeting this man bc the idea of that. leaf print tie haunted him#that and the gay thoughts#fix him Romano …. fix him#I keep saving the draft then coming back bc ACTUALLY ROMANO CANT SAY SHIT w the Italy flag tie#both of them straight to prison
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it's still blowing my mind that i thought we'd be getting something close to cartoon villain lestat at the trial and instead we got... this weeping broken thing who can't help but stop in the middle of it all to give louis a genuine, heartfelt apology for the monstrous thing he did to him. who refused to go along with the narrative that he didn't think he would be hurting louis when he did it. whose shame and love are overwhelming him in equal measure and to such a degree that he can't perform. he can barely stand...
and it actually feels like... the closest thing we've gotten to ~real~ lestat so far in this show? even though it's still just a memory, louis is remembering the sincerity of him even if he claims he wasn't moved by it. he's sitting there and he's...
he's remembering. even as he circles right back around to the narrative that lestat was only there because he wanted them dead. it was just more lestat insanity, of course. a moment of realness in the middle of his revenge to meant disorient, nothing more. with armand being ever-helpful and chiming in to confirm that lestat is the one who does this. lestat is the one who wants to leave you with no sense of what is or what is not. yes. that's right. it's LESTAT...
but louis is almost there. louis is remembering...
#and now i am incandescently tired and i am going to BED#but i'll be back bright and early to continue inflicting my can't shut up disease on you all#because i do have a loooot more to say about armand specifically lmao#interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire spoilers#loustat#otp: all my love belongs to you#iwtv meta
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#trans man#ftm#now crawling back into bed bc i am sick#it's a silly little selfie. but seeing my chest in something that used to make me feel so dysphoric#in the mirror was just very nice today.#from my slumber i wish everyone a very big wish for gender euphoria
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Based on a true story.
#kinitopet#kinito#kinito pet#shitpost#did i wake up at 4ish am after going to bed at 2:30ish?#yes#did i spend one + hour doing this instead of going back to bed?#also yes.#disappointment.
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Every time I picture JereJean meeting with Andriel in a Walmart parking lot to transfer custody of their mutual boyfriend I get another year of my life back.
#jean moreau#jeremy knox#andrew minyard#neil josten#Jean is so bitchy when he hands Kevin over like ‘his bedtime *is* one am. I’m tired of fixing his sleep schedule every time he comes back#from your place’#and ‘you *know* he’s not supposed to have alcohol. you’re ruining his diet. it always takes us three days to get him back to drinking water’#like he’s a tired mother who’s kid comes back hepped up on ice cream and refusing to go to bed at eight#don’t get me wrong though#andriel is an equally strict household#they just have different rules
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Lamb: Hurry and get dressed, I scheduled a talk therapy session for you and the other Bishops and it’s starting in ten minutes.
Narinder: IT IS THREE IN THE MORNING—
#Narinder notices his tail coming up in a happy posture when he sees it’s the Lamb who woke him up and has a crisis about it once she leaves#Anyhoo!#Lamb projects her fear of never reconciling with her family after they’re revived onto Narinder#while Narinder projects his need to seek power over and subjugate the people who wrong him onto her#they’re constantly avoiding their own problems by meddling with each other’s and we love to see it#anyhoo I forgot to post this and am going back to bed now. nighty-night y’all#better the wool au#narilamb#cult of the lamb#cotl narinder#cotl lamb#cotl
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ladies, gentlemen, and everyone in between... i present to you, them. Then tomorrow I shall present you with them again.
#lucanis dellamorte#rookanis#rook x lucanis#rook aldwir#rook#veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard#im so glad i gave her mullet back to her#they can be a mullet x mullet couple#this may be a part of a series of drawings that are a lot spicer that shall never see the light of day#i am religiously adding back his body hair#he looks wrong without it#they are two of the biggest dorks in bed nobody can tell me otherwise#i have so many hcs i dont dare speak a loud but they have such a special place in my heart#okay ill stop rambling in the tags#torren aldwir#my oc#my rook
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GET HIS ASS
#Jean is about to break a pillow over Harry lmao…#god I love and miss them.#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#jean vicquemare#I have a ref for this I just can’t find it…#I’m sure if I typed in ‘pillow fight meme’ it would pop right up#but alas I am so tired…going back to bed for a moment lmao..
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I've only been saying that for years
#german stuff#and on that note I am really truly going to bed#I only came back online to track my finished book on Goodreads anyways#good night!!! what a day.
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it is Sunday which means Vinny gets to sit alone, on the counter, in the dark, staring at the coffee maker. It is his activity.
#Taking new med to raise blood pressure and sweep away heart palpitations which was going great#Until I forgot to take it before bed and woke up at 3 am with symptoms back Swinging#My brain was still asleep but my body was in hell
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