#and every reply would need to begin with an apology and explanation

[marimbles]

It seems to be pretty well established that most fanfic authors don’t mind when readers leave comments on old fics and in fact welcome it. But what about authors replying to old comments?

Do readers care in general whether an author replies? Is it expected and seen as rude if they don’t? Is it nice when they do but not expected? Is there a time limit to the welcomeness of replies? Like is it nice if they respond within a few weeks but if it’s been months or years it feels awkward because you don’t remember the fic anymore? I’m curious!

[vettelsvee]

I DON'T APOLOGIZE FOR WINNING | Sebastian Vettel

f1 masterlist | wattpad | ao3 | instagram

rbr sebastian vettel x schumacher!reader | part 2 here

summary: y/n thinks she's sick from f1 traveling stress, but what if that's not the reason of her sickness?

word count: 992

warnings: hints of having sex. mentions of wishing to die (because reader is sick af). use of y/n

you can send your one shots requests here! feedback, as well as comments and reblogs, are truly appreciated!

It was barely five in the morning, and the sun was beginning to rise on the horizon of the city of Berlin. Sebastian and you, without having been able to rest after the German Grand Prix that had taken place just hours ago, were at the airport of the German capital, ready to head to Hungary, where the next Formula 1 competition would be held.

You were aware that following the lifestyle of a high-level racing driver was not easy. However, you didn't think that getting eight hours of sleep or having free time would become privileges that you would have, in part, during the holiday period. Despite the excitement that filled you every time you embarked on a new destination, you had been feeling unwell for several days, and no matter how hard you tried to remedy it, all you did was worsen it.

Seb, who knew you well enough to know that something was wrong, tried not to make a big deal out of it. He knew that you tended to get sick frequently, although the fact that you was quieter than usual and didn't have as much energy as usual started to worry the blonde who, at the moment of takeoff, observed carefully as your face grew paler, while you gripped the armrest of the seat tightly.

"Y/N, are you okay?" Sebastian asked with concern.

You tried to breathe deeply to calm the wave of nausea you were feeling right now.

"Yes," you simply replied, faking a smile. "I just feel a little uncomfortable with takeoff, you know airplanes and I are not friends. Stop worrying, love. You'll see it'll pass soon."

Despite your multiple reassurances, Seb couldn't convince himself. Your eyes reflected how you felt, and he had no doubt that you were hiding something from him to avoid worrying him.To try to relax you, he leaned towards you to leave a kiss on your cheek.

"Sweetheart, I know you've told me you're okay, but if you start feeling worse, let me know, okay?"

You nodded, silently thanking the German for his concern.

Although he tried not to make a big deal out of it, the truth was that as the flight progressed towards its destination, you felt worse, even reaching the point where nausea turned into frequent trips to the bathroom to vomit, and constant dizziness into a desire to faint and not wake up for a few days.

"Seb, I swear… I can't deal with this anymore."

After suddenly getting up from your seat, hurrying to the bathroom trying not to cause too much commotion among the other passengers, you quickly locked yourself in the small cubicle, bending over the toilet to empty everything you didn't know you had inside yourself. Sebastian watched with concern as you fled, trying not to lose his composure under the curious gaze of those present, including a few Red Bull engineers.

“Y/N!”, Seb called out as quietly as he could, anxious because you weren’t responding. “Are you okay? Please, open the door.”

You didn't answer him, which only heightened Vettel's anxiety. He fixed his gaze on the bathroom door, waiting for you to come out and give him some explanation of what was happening.

After what felt like an eternity, you emerged from the bathroom with a completely pale face and a tired look. Sebastian simply pulled her close to his chest and held her tightly in an embrace.

"Love, what's wrong?" he said anxiously. "I need to know what's going on. Things can't continue like this if you're going to keep accompanying me. I'm sure it's getting to you: everything is overwhelming you and..."

Suddenly, you began to cry from the helplessness you were feeling, causing Sebastian to hold you even tighter, stroking your back to help you relax as much as possible.

"I can't take it anymore, Seb. I feel awful. I want to die right now."

"We should seek help," he said, wiping your tears away. "We'll see what we can do now to keep you as relaxed as possible for the remainder of the flight, okay? And when we land, we'll go to an emergency room to see what's wrong with you."

Sebastian then called one of the flight attendants in their area and explained the distressing situation, emphasizing that he wouldn't want anyone to find out to avoid conflicts with both the media and his team. The flight attendant simply nodded and informed them to return to their seats, immediately assisting the world champion's partner.

"Mrs. Vettel, here's some water and an aspirin," the woman kindly offered you. "Additionally, I've informed the crew about your wife's situation," she said, now looking at the blonde, "and they confirmed that if she gets worse, there's no problem in making an emergency landing at the nearest airport."

"I'm not Sebastian's wife..."

"Thank you very much," the driver interrupted, thanking the flight attendant for her assistance.

The German began to laugh at your reaction as soon as the woman left.

"You should have seen your face, Y/N. You can't deny that you didn't mind being referred to as my wife," Seb said, stroking your hair and opening the water bottle for you to take a sip.

The flight continued, and although the nausea had been brought under control, the discomfort persisted. The couple was aware that there was only, thankfully, about half an hour of travel left.

"Darling," Sebastian whispered sweetly. "Close your eyes and focus on your breathing: inhale through your nose, and exhale through your mouth. I'm here, hold my hand."

You followed your partner's instructions, allowing yourself to be guided by his voice, which was truly comforting in those moments, in each inhalation and exhalation. Gradually, you began to feel calmer, and you would even swear that you hadn't felt this way in several days.

Finally, the plane reached its destination. You felt greatly relieved that the flight, which had caused you so much distress, had come to an end as it had left her physically and mentally exhausted.

As soon as your feet touched Hungarian soil, Sebastian made sure that you felt as comfortable as possible before heading to the hotel. Despite the rush Britta, Sebastian's PR, took a moment in some small seats to rest and, as much as possible, recover from the turbulent journey they had just endured.

Although he knew he might hurt your feelings, Sebastian decided to broach the subject with a mischievous smile:

"Love, don't you think we've had enough intense Sunday nights celebrating my victories? Because I think it's led to something good."

At first, you were a bit confused, but a few seconds later you let out a shy and sweet laugh. The driver wasn't lying: sex had become your ritual to bid farewell to the weekend and, above all, as a celebration of Seb's victories that season. Now that you remembered, there were quite a few occasions where you didn’t use protection, so you thought that the possibility was even more up in the air now.

"It could be, Seb," you said with a knowing smile. "If I am, we could have a pretty big problem..."

"Please, love, don't say that," Vettel drew closer to you, taking your hand and gently tracing small circles on it with his fingers. "If you're pregnant, I'm sure you'll be an amazing mother. Besides, I know we haven't talked about this, but I've always wanted to be a father and I can't imagine anyone better than you to fulfill this dream."

Tears began to form in your eyes, and you hurried to wipe them away to prevent your boyfriend from noticing.

"So, what do you say? Should we tell Britta that we need to go to the pharmacy and buy a test? That way we can find out, and if it's a no, we can keep trying," you clarified eagerly. "What do you think about tonight?"

Feeling excited, after you explained the situation to the woman who had become another member of the family, and who, obviously, had been thrilled at the possible news, headed to the nearest pharmacy to avoid arousing suspicions among the journalists and paparazzi, who were lurking around with the intention of getting the latest scoop on the man of the moment.

Alone together and holding the small bag containing the test, you began to feel nervous as they approached their room. Upon entering the suite, you both sat on the edge of the bed, taking a moment to calm themselves before checking whether you would become parents.

"Okay," you said, taking a deep breath, "I'm ready."

After that, you opened the box containing the test and went to the bathroom, where you followed the instructions carefully. Once finished, you placed it on the surface of the sink and returned to where Seb was, waiting for the indicated time to pass to see the result.

You approached your boyfriend, who gently stroked your back once again to comfort you. He knew you were nervous and scared. He felt the same way.

"Whatever the result is, I'm grateful to have a woman like you in my life. I'll be by your side no matter what, ok?" Sebastian reassured you.

Tears filled the your eyes again, and as you looked at your watch and saw that the waiting time was over, you ran as fast as you could to the bathroom, followed by an anxious Sebastian.

Quickly, you took the test in your hands and saw the result:

"It's positive!" you shouted, your voice trembling. "I'm pregnant, Sebastian!"

A wave of emotions engulfed you both, not knowing what to do except to embrace tightly as you felt a mixture of astonishment and joy, as well as uncertainties about what could happen from that moment on.

"Well, it turns out that in the end I'm not just good at pointing with my index finger when I win," Sebastian teased you mischievously.

"I find it surreal that you're making dirty jokes after finding out we're going to have a child."

"I guess," the driver continued playfully, "we'll have to tell this little one that his dad is a two-time, for now, Formula 1 world champion, and that his mother is a champion in other aspects."

You laughed at your boyfriend's quips, finding them unbelievable.

"Come on, Seb, don't act modest now saying you didn't have merit. You know perfectly well that I motivated you quite a bit during those baby-making sessions."

"Of course, I'm not saying otherwise," the German continued jokingly. "I'm sure the baby will become the royalty of Formula 1. Who wouldn't want to have Vettel and Schumacher genes?"

Both of you burst into laughter, filling the room, giving way your thoughts on how you would tell your families, the media, your respective coworkers... Especially, you spent a few minutes sharing your expectations about what your life would be like from that day on.

"Miss Schumacher and future Mrs. Vettel, let me tell you that now that we know we're expecting a little miracle, I propose we celebrate it in a more... intimate way."

"You can't even give me a day's break, can you? I don't know about you, but I'm convinced my father wouldn't find it amusing to hear his daughter screaming to ask her boyfriend for more," you said, knowing your father would be in the adjacent rooms.

"I know," Seb simply said, "but I’ve won in life, and I don't apologize for winning."

[bts-preference]

6. When he misses you

Namjoon: When he travels, he will often send you a song or a passage from a book that reminds him of you. Sometimes, it is something that is dripping in angst because he is missing you, and other times it is something to cheer you up after you've had a bad day. Sometimes, he will send it without any other explanation (so sure that you will understand what he means) and other times he will want to say more. You listen to every song and read every quote he sends, saving the stuff that resonates with you the most so you can have them when you're missing him.

Jin: The first time he had food delivered to you while he was away, you tossed it in the trash, thinking it was from a sasaeng. Later, while on the phone with him, he excitedly asks if you have eaten. "What do you mean 'no?'" he questions after you reply, suddenly deflated, "I triple checked the delivery address." It dawns on you that the food left at your door was from him, and you immediately begin to apologize. He laughs it off, relieved you were looking out for your safety, and promises next time he will give you a heads up - he just wants to make sure you are still taken care of while he's away.

Yoongi: Within hours of him leaving for a business trip, a bouquet of flowers always arrives on your doorstep. The bouquets are always large and extravagant, arranged with the most vibrant flowers you have ever seen. Each bouquet comes with a small message, and even with limited characters, he still somehow manages to eloquently convey how much he truly loves you. If he is on a longer trip, a second bouquet may show up. When he returns from his trip, he will always examine the flowers carefully before turning to you to say, "I wonder who sent these to you."

Hoseok: Even when he travels for work, he always wishes he could bring you with him. Short trips are easier to get through - text messages and phone calls sort of help. However, longer trips almost always feel impossible, and he eventually breaks after trying to convince himself he is fine. You receive a phone call from him, and can immediately tell something is wrong. "I need you," he says, hoarsely, "If I were to book you a ticket, would you come see me?" Not realizing how much you were struggling, too, you reply without any hesitation, "I would never say 'no' to seeing you, Hobi."

Jimin: If someone were to tell you that all he does is text you when he's away, you would believe them. Sometimes, he sends so many texts that for a fleeting moment, you think about muting him (just temporarily, of course). When he texts you, he doesn't need you to reply to every one - he is even happy with you replying once for every five he sends. If you were to ask him, he knows he is being clingy, and probably annoying, too. He really doesn't mean it but he never wants you to think that he is not thinking of you (and he hopes that you are thinking about him, too).

Taehyung: To no one's surprise, his primary way of updating you while he's away is sending photos. He will send photos of the places he is visiting; the food he is eating; and even the occasional selfie. With every photo, he includes a quick caption, providing just a little more context (but he is always willing to share more if you ask). At first, this was something that only he did. However, he was so excited when you started sending photos back. To him, there is a quiet intimacy to allowing him to see glimpses of your day - he had not realized how important it was to him until you started.

Jungkook: When he is away, he FaceTimes you as often as possible. Because of your schedules and the time zone differences, your calls can feel random and disjointed. But sometimes, you catch each other when you are both getting ready for bed. So while laying in your beds (sometimes hundreds of miles apart), you talk about your day before drifting to other things, sometimes deep (hopes and dreams) and sometimes silly (like an old inside joke you just remembered). Sometimes you get into a "no, you hang up first" before actually hanging up, and other times you both fall asleep while still on the call.

[iblameashley]

Dating Simon 'Ghost' Riley

Civilian | Male | Gay

Content: Headcanons, Gay stuff, First dates, Budding relationship, Pre-relationship, Alcohol use, Mixed emotions, Military stuff, Guns, etc.

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley | Male

!!!SFW!!!

Note: This is kind of an in between of short-story and bullet point dating headcanons. I've wanted to write this for a while, but lacked motivation to go full story mode... sorry! Also, I do not know UK Gun Laws or how Gun Ranges work there, so just... go with the flow, OK?

It happened weeks ago; Simon stared down at his phone with a sense of dread, though you'd never have known just looking at him. He didn't even know why he had agreed to download this fucking app to begin with, though as usual it was at Soap and Gaz's insistence... and pestering. All he had wanted was some quiet on his day off, not to be harassed by yet another chatty man looking to suck his dick in an alley.

Sighing, he scrolled to the message that had just come in – a handsome young lad with a wide smile and kind eyes. It had started innocently enough, the usual pleasantries first, briefs answers after, and the long wait to see how long it would take to either receive a dick-pic or have a request for one.

Neither happened. In fact, the lad had actually carried on a decent conversation over the course the last few weeks, inquiring about hobbies and interests, career and what he was looking for. But then the lad had asked that they meet up on the upcoming weekend.

It's ironic that Ghost decided to ghost the poor lad. He didn't block him – frankly, he didn't know how – he simply didn't respond and closed the app. It was for the best, at least that's what he told himself, though he had blatantly lied to Gaz and Soap when asked how it was going, claiming all he could find was horny men looking for a quick hookup. Not that Gaz or Soap understood why that was a problem; they assumed Ghost getting laid couldn't make him worse.

But then they found out he lied, a casual glance at his phone when a message came in, and then another, asking about the date and apologizing if he had offended Simon.

Its rare that anyone could corner Ghost, but that's just what Soap and Gaz did, hounding their commanding officer until he ran out of excuses.

“Ye owe the lad an explanation.” Soap chided him, a finger pointed in his face.

“Agreed, you can't leave the lad hanging!” Gaz chimed in with a disgruntled look on his face.

So Simon agreed to apologize and reply to the poor lad, and even agreed to a date. He was ready for this, he knew he was charming and could flirt with the best of em', he just had no need to before. He simply wasn't interesting in dating.

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Cuppa

Simon: He felt nervous for this date, in many ways it felt like a blind date since he had only ever seen your face in a few pictures. He dressed nicely (Button-down, fitted jeans, boots and some cologne was dabbed behind his ears where the mask hooked), He was confident, pleasant, charming and funny throughout the date. But he saw the way you looked at him with every passing question and answer and was beginning to think this was a mistake. You weren't compatible... but why did that bother him?

You: You arrived early and found a nice little table at the cafe to wait for Simon. To say you were surprised by the giant of a man who appeared would be an understatement. As you both settled in and ordered drinks, you attempted to dive right into it. Your talk walk halting and awkward as Simon dodged most questions about himself with grunts, shrugs or one-word answers. His insistence on using terrible puns and dad-jokes made it more difficult to get to know him. It was frustrating, to say the least, but you persisted. He did at least ask some questions about you, which eased things, but you knew that if this was all he was willing to give, it would be difficult to go on more dates, let alone start a relationship.

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Movie and Dinner

Simon: Of course Simon would agree to a movie date followed by dinner. It meant that he got to sit in silence and darkness for about two hours, and then could have a bite to eat after where you would likely do a majority of the talking. He had already tried his best on the first date, it was up to you to pick up the slack this time. The movie went fine for the most part, except when you grabbed his arm during a jump-scare that made him roll his eyes.

Over dinner, he picked away at the curry on his plate while you discussed the movie. He was surprised by your review of the movie and its themes and found himself agreeing with you on many points. Maybe you weren't such a terrible date after all. He decided to pay for dinner, despite your protests.

You: It was stupid of you to choose a thriller for a movie date, but you really wanted to see the movie and no one else would go with you. Since Simon agreed, you made it a date and added dinner after. Thank the good Lord it was dark in the theatre; you turned bright red at the jump scare and felt bad for grabbing Simon's arm. You felt the way he tensed, but were too embarrassed to apologize to him.

Dinner went much better and Simon actually became more engaging as you discussed the movie and its plot. He seemed to enjoy your nerding out and even cracked a small smile.

As dinner came to an end, you thanked him for the (genuinely) enjoyable night and get ready to pay, since the date was your suggestion. Simon wouldn't allow it and ended up paying regardless. Maybe this lumbering, awkward man wasn't so bad after all.

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Pub Trivia

Simon: Simon's intelligence isn't limited to Military knowledge, so he decided to take you to a pub trivia night, though he couldn't understand why he had this continued desire to impress you. You. Just some civilian who had taken an interest in him.

In between the rounds and pints, he started to talk to you about his mates Gaz and Soap who gave him the idea for this date. You'd like them, he was sure, but it was too early for you to be meeting his friends, he was sure to remind you.

You: You couldn't deny the Simon was an encyclopedia of general knowledge, his brain was like a sponge, it seemed. He had filled in the sheets of answers rather quickly each round, but you got the chance to flex your brain full of useless pop culture knowledge in the last few rounds.

What really entertained you though, was that the drunker this man got, the more he was willing to open up to you... you should have got him pissed sooner. You laughed when he reminded you it was too early to meet his friends, despite never asking to. This man was ridiculous and in its own way, it was endearing.

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Aquarium

Simon: He had agreed to a date with you a few weeks prior but had to cancel due to deployment. He promised he'd take you out when he got back, but by the time the mission was over and he returned to base he didn't want to do the obstacle course. You surprised him when you offered a less energy-intensive option, and here he was at the aquarium now.

As you two strolled leisurely through the dark hallways of glass staring at a multitude of sea creates, Simon found himself actually relaxing; something he was unaccustomed to after a long mission. You stood unreasonably close, but he allowed it, figuring you were uncomfortable with all the other people wandering close by.

A brief stop at the aquarium cafeteria (for an unimpressive meal that would have made the mess hall staff on base look like Michelin Star chefs), filled the both of you up enough to know you'd make it to dinner and something more satisfying.

You managed to convince Simon to take a walk through the gift shop, and ended up buying him a pack of face masks with a shark-teeth pattern on them. He was surprised and delighted, though he wouldn't admit that to you.

You: Your heart sank when Simon tried to cancel the date - but you also understood he just came back from deployment. Maybe you were getting to know him better between the dates and texting, but you could feel his exhaustion, so you offered an alternative; a stroll through the aquarium.

It was rather cold in the building and you found yourself drifting towards Simon... that's how it started anyway. He smelled good too, and you felt comfortable with him. You desperately wanted to hold his hand, but figured that was a boundary too far for right now.

You treated him to food in the cafeteria, swallowing it hard and trying to hide your dissatisfaction with the offerings while he ate everything on his plate with his usual impassive face.

There was no plan to buy anything from the gift shop, you just liked wandering them to see what was there... but the sight of the face masks was too good to pass up. Simon always showed up to a date in a mask, and only took it off when eating, drinking or for a quick smoke. So it seemed fitting and perfect get these shark-print ones for him. You thought you could see a smile under his current mask as you handed them to him.

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Shooting Range

Simon: Simon was absolutely intent on showing off his sharpshooting skills to you. It was the closest thing to 'giddy' that he allowed himself to feel as he drove you to the range. Simon is an expert in his field, matched only by sparingly few men - and several good women too.

But there was also a feeling of caution and anxiety as you both signed in and got your gear ready. Simon watched like a hawk as you eyed the guns over before making a few selections. A Glock 17, Mossberg 500 and M4 Carbine... Interesting selections.

This was as handsy as Simon had ever been with someone, ensuring that your safety gear was secure and that you followed instructions to the letter. He was already hesitant about this activity to begin with, but you seemed genuinely interested.

Simon ensured that you paid close attention, and that he assisted you with aiming as well as stood close by as you fired. What he wasn't expecting was your proficiency with the Mossberg. You each took turns firing at targets, and to no surprise to either of you, Simon was the winner... though there were no winners, it was all in good fun. But if there were, Simon would have won.

You: You chose the Glock because it had always fascinated you, the Mossberg because you grew up in the country and were familiar with similar shotguns and the Carbine because it seemed the most military of the selection.

You couldn't stop the thrill that ran through you as Simon checked all your gear and guns, ensuring everything was secure and safeties were on before going straight into his lecture about gun safety. You listened to him speak with confidence and authority, happy to see him in his element. You wanted to make sure you gave him and the guns the respect they deserved and did everything he said without question - or at least with very little question.

Your heart raced as Simon kept close. You knew very little about guns overall, but the way he pressed himself against you to help you aim, the calm voice he spoke in as he guided you, the feeling of his hand on your back as he stepped away to let you take the shot. You were melting with happiness.

The biggest thrill was when you fired the Mossberg several times. The look on Simon's face was priceless as you expertly handled the shotgun and even gave him a run for his money with your accuracy, but that was a secret to share another time.

You gracefully conceded your defeat to the expert in front of you, but couldn't help but notice what might have been pride in his look as he reviewed your targets one last time.

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Cooking Class(es)

Simon: It's not that Simon is bad at cooking - he's really not - but he didn't have the opportunity to flex his skill often, and he had a select few dishes that he excelled at. So when you suggested this date, he was a bit apprehensive.

But Simon was a man used to following orders - usually - and listened intently to everything that was explained to him, so he settled in at the table next to you and took charge.

He needed a bowl? You had it for him already. Needed something washed? It was already done and drying. Missing ingredient? Nope, on your left. Simon appreciated your own attentiveness to the task, and how you made it go so much more smoothly.

And then the dessert section came up, and Simon floundered. Hard. Main courses aren't a challenge for him, but Simon doesn't bake. Not for a lack of interest, but a lack of time usually.

You picked up the slack though, and he reluctantly ceded control to you, letting you guide him in making the Zeppole.

Simon's demeanour softened as the class came to an end and you both sat there sampling the homemade ravioli, a glass of wine and eventually the Zeppole.

Before you parted ways, you gave Simon a tight hug, demanding he return it otherwise you weren't letting go. Simon decided to simply return the hug instead of forcing you off him.... not because he actually liked the hug from you.

You: Simon seemed to be taking this class very seriously from the moment he arrived. He stood in a typical rigid manner while listening and nodding along as instructions were given. The only thing missing was a few 'Yes sir!' replies.

The man made a complete mess though, and you found yourself quickly cleaning up after him in an attempt to keep up with his pace. But even still, you had fun. You got him the things you both needed for the meal, made sure the table was tidy and even engaged in some small talk.

It took everything in you to not laugh out loud as you say the panic in Simon's eyes as he read the instructions for the dessert. It was like he was reading a completely different language and, after a few failed starts, you took over and guided him.

As the class came to an end, and you could both indulge in the meal you created together. You clinked your wine glass against his and took a bite of the ravioli that was mostly his handiwork. It was good! Dessert wasn't too bad either and Simon gave a contented smile as he ate the last of the Zeppole.

You both relaxed on a nearby bench after the class for a few minutes, letting the meal settle in your stomachs before Simon explained he needed to get back to base. You stood up to say your goodbyes, but noticed how he lingered. How he hovered over you; closer than you were accustomed to from him. Taking the chance, you stepped closer and wrapped your arms around his waist and lowered your head into the crook of his neck. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, and you begin to worry you misread the situation; joking that you weren't going to let go until he reciprocated, and gently his hands found their way to your backside and pulled you into the best hug you've ever had. Simon held on longer than you did, though you never truly let go until his hands fell to his sides.

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[fedrifan78]

deja vu.

masterlist suggested by: @facesblurry summary: ferran gets a new girlfriend, but he isn't really over pedri. word count: 715ish genre: angst

Sunlight poured through the high windows of the Ciutat Esportiva gym. Pedri González sat on the bench inside the training room, knees pulled close. He watched Ferran Torres walk alongside Sira Martínez to their car. Ferran’s arm rested on her waist, and she laughed at something he said. The sound hit Pedri like a sharp stab.

Sira was Luis Enrique’s daughter. Everyone on the team knew it. The weight of that connection was impossible to ignore. She had the pedigree and approval Ferran suddenly seemed to crave. For the world, she was perfect for him. For Pedri, she was the reminder of everything lost.

Watching Ferran with Sira felt like watching a life that should have been his but was now someone else’s. Memories crashed over him: the late nights under Barcelona’s stars, Ferran’s hand holding his, the plans they once made for a future together.

That smile Ferran wore had once been only for Pedri. Now it was the same smile, but aimed at another. The laughter and inside jokes they shared belonged to the past. The small touches lasted too long to be casual, but now they were with Sira.

Pedri’s chest tightened as waves of jealousy and grief overwhelmed him. It was not just losing Ferran but losing the future they had built together in their minds.

His phone buzzed in his pocket. A message from Gavi.

GAVI: You alright?

Pedri hesitated but typed back. PEDRI: Not really.

Gavi replied quickly. GAVI: Vamos, training’s about to start. I’ll talk to you during the warm-up run, vale?

Pedri forced himself up and joined the team on the pitch. The grass was green beneath his feet, but his heart felt cold. Every sprint and pass was shadowed by the thought of Ferran. The boy he loved was no longer his.

After practice, Pedri headed to the locker room. It felt hollow without Ferran’s laughter echoing. He grabbed his bag but paused when he heard voices nearby.

Ferran was talking to Sira with an easy, casual tone. Pedri’s heart pounded painfully. He wanted to look away, but couldn’t.

Pain tightened his chest, raw and relentless. He wanted to scream or run, but instead, he turned and left.

That night, Pedri was left alone with his thoughts on his drive home. No messages from Ferran. No apologies. No explanations.

A song blasted through his car speakers over and over again. ‘Deja Vu’ by Olivia Rodrigo.

“I know you get deja vu when she’s with you.”

It felt like the song was written for him. Watching Ferran live the life they dreamed of. Laughing with someone new. Smiling at someone else.

The next day, Pedri’s phone buzzed again. A message from Ferran.

FERRAN: Can we talk?

Pedri stared at the screen for a long moment before replying. PEDRI: What is there left to say? Ferran answered quickly. FERRAN: Everything.

They met at a quiet café, far from the team and press. Ferran looked tired, the spark in his eyes dim but honest.

“I never wanted to hurt you,” Ferran said. “Sira has been part of my life for a while. It’s complicated.”

Pedri swallowed hard. “Complicated doesn’t cover it. You left without hardly a word.”

“I was scared,” Ferran said softly. “Scared of what people would think. Scared of losing everything I worked for. You know how this world is.”

Pedri’s voice cracked. “But I was your love. Not your secret.”

Ferran reached for Pedri’s hand but stopped just before touching it. “You were. You still are.”

They sat in silence, caught between love and loss, past and future. The city hummed outside, but inside, time felt frozen.

Pedri thought about the promises they abandoned. The dreams left behind. He felt the weight of a love too painful to hold but too important to forget.

Ferran squeezed his hand gently. “I don’t want this to be the end.”

Tears blurred Pedri’s vision. “Maybe some endings are needed for new beginnings.”

He stood, heart heavy but sure. “I hope you find happiness, Ferran. And I hope it is real.”

Ferran watched him walk away, the loss settling deep in his chest.

Outside, the sun dipped below the horizon. Two men, once inseparable, now walked different paths. Both haunted by a love neither could forget.

- sofía ✎ᝰ.

[fivewholeminutes]

I apologize if this comes across as rude but im really interested to know what sleep token twitter yall stumbled upon...? because im there as much as i am on here and ive literally seen people openly drop names in the main tag here, while on twitter you can have a private accound and.... ive only seen past projects discussed there? not even pictures or names (at least from the ones i follow) Unless what youre talking about is older st tweets from their account, then yes, some assholes with like 0 followers did drop Vessels name a couple times from what ive seen, but i have yet to see a name drop or something simmilar by someone who has more than a fart for a follower (meaning it doesnt show up on the tl if they post, and if its in someones replies the poster can hide it) I feel like the problem with it is the same as its on here, ocassional name or face drop that cant really be stopped, and its always from someone who, like i said, probably has 0 followers and made that throwaway to fuck with people. As unfortunate as it is. Again, sorry if it came across as rude, but like... no need to ward people off twitter for no reason lol, its pretty welcoming there as somene whos been in the fandom since 2022 🤷‍♀️

Hey anon, you're not rude at all, dw!

The aversion to sttw is a common thing here on tumblr, trust me. I'm glad to hear you managed to have a good twitter experience, cause damn. That is a gem. I'll tell you my personal experience with twitter. It's all from around spring-summer 2023, more or less.

I wasn't an active member of the st community there, i was only lurking, mostly in the search tab. Looking for words "sleep token" for the very first time made me reluctant to be a part of that community in the first few seconds of my search lmao. That venture into the search tab happened on a day the band was literally a few minutes from starting their set on one of the festivals. Some users were discussing the band being 30 min late, which is a completely normal thing, especially during festivals, when the scene is not free for a whole day for the band to set up their stuff. Those users were complaining that vessel most likely is getting drunk before the set, or is too drunk to get on the stage and this is totally why the band is late. Not accepting any other explanations. Many others were agreeing with them, joking about it and so on. 30 min is really nothing. The starting times for any concert of festival are almost never the actual times the sets begin.

Apart from that, my searches usually had a "true" metal fan revealing their names every 10 posts or straight up showing me cryptocurrency posts, just because they had the word "token" in it. That was tiring. Again, that two aspects are not really sttw community's fault, but they made my experience worse.

And hey, maybe if i started following a few people and kept my sttw experience only to them, it would be better. We'll never know now tho and frankly. I couldn't find anyone who would post there stuff i was interested in enough to follow.

The assholes with 0 followers were commenting on random sttw people's posts too, resulting in no post being safe from seeing their names. The boom after the band became popular bc of the summoning blowing up was luring those bastards in like moths to a lamp fr. Every time i tried to look for some cool st-related stuff i was stumbling upon a dozen of those people.

And then. I remember a drama where more "popular" sttw accounts started to have a war with some other account about god knows what. Don't remember the details, but like. The attacked account dared to comment on something the more "popular" accounts said and then that account and all their friends and minions started a bullying campaign against that one person. That was very distasteful for me. Especially that it wasn't something bad, they just didn't agree with the "popular" account about something.

So, sttw was always kind of a clique that would send hounds after you if you weren't thinking exactly like them. I think that drama ended up with the "popular" account being driven away from twitter, because people started standing up to them and a lot of nasty stuff they were saying about other people was revealed. Man, it was almost 2 years ago, i don't remember the details well. But in general, when fandoms have "popular" accounts/blogs that are worshipped almost as much as the actual thing the fandom is about, nothing good comes from that, ever.

Then there was a drama about one user who was claiming they're iv girlfriend. With some personal photos of iv being sent to that person's friends and stuff. Another red flag for me.

I left twitter shortly after, due to whatever the musk rat was doing with it, not necessarily because of the st community.

Now i only hear about yet another stupid take or drama from there from my mutuals on tumblr who for some reason still have more patience for twitter than me.

The one about "uwu don't draw vessel with his scars, because we don't wanna see them but also bc uwu we care about him" was the latest spectacular fuck up on sttw's part. I won't go into detail about this one, i covered it before and i don't want to go back to that one, cause the "art should be comforting" stuff and treating vessel like he isn't a grown ass man still makes my blood boil.

There was also another drama recently that got talked about here on tumblr, but i forgot what it was about, oops.

So. That'smore or less why twitter community is being frowned upon here, anon. There is just Always Some Stupid Drama there.

[justthemoonz]

In Stars and Time Character analysis - Loop until you've Changed

I haven't done a Character Analysis in a really long time, the last one that I did was for something relating Deltarune. But I really liked In Stars and Time and wanted to do a Character Analysis on one of my favorite characters from the game. Also known as "Loop" (I also made this analysis while in a DM with a friend, and I thought I'd share it here too).

This analysis will OBVIOUSLY have Spoilers for In Stars and Time so be warned of that... Anywho let's begin

First of all, this is mainly a few things I've gathered/noticed from my own playthrough, so it might not be FULLY correct (so feel free to correct me with anything about it, and I'll update it!!), I also will take into account the QnA for the game, but only a few specific things

Loop is a very interesting character, from start to end. But the thing that really made me wonder what Loop's deal was, was when they mentioned the "royal We" in my first conversation with them

After this, Siffrin will reply with "That doesn't make ANY sense."

To which Loop replies with something similar like "Ah, right, I guess it doesn't."

After that...

Loop tells you to call them by "they/them"

If you already know the deal with Loop, you don't need me to explain what makes this interesting, but if you still don't fully know, Loop is Siffrin from "Start Again: A Prologue", or at least it's heavily implied

So why does Loop specifically want you to refer to them with "they/them", as opposed to just having the same gender as Siffrin (he/they)?

We already know from the QnA that Loop doesn't actually mind he/him to be used on them, but they want to be called they/them for distinction

But I feel like there's a lot more than that to it, and that involves Siffrin not being happy with themself

At some point in the game, you can interact with a book about body craft, talking about how Siffrin wouldn't mind changing their body if they had the time, but they will still use the "meat prison" they are currently in for a little while

Which made me think, if Loop is meant to be Siffrin, isn't Loop just... a version of Siffrin who has gone through self reflection on their own journey?

Something like "I might have suffered a lot, but I've discovered myself better in the process"

Maybe the turning into a star person thing has more meaning than just being a cool design choice, maybe it's because during Loop's own journey as Siffrin, they've "ascended". We also know that Loop has no actual idea how they look like, up until Siffrin draws them (if you do that interaction), so there's that too

Which also makes me think that the Silver Coin situation might also have a bit more symbolism to it, especially when it involves Loop

Sure, they're both Siffrin on the surface, one side of the same coin, but we know that's not at all true when we get to...

The dagger scene

I think this was the point for me where I realized that the Siffrin we play as completely hates themself, and wouldn't mind just ending their own life, if it means it gets the job done faster

While Loop very clearly is against the idea

But why? If Loop was Siffrin, why would they care? Wouldn't they agree on it? Because they also hate themself, just like Siffrin does?

No, Loop doesn't hate themself, at least not anymore, and instead hates the idea of someone that is basically them, before this entire journey, seeing their own body as "nothing but something disposable and useless"

The Loop secret fight is also a different can worms, the only real explanation I have for that is Loop doesn't mind being Loop while Siffrin is stuck in an infinite Loop, but the moment they break it fully, Loop would rather throw away their own existance in order to be someone they used to be, just for the sake of being with the ones that used to care about them in their own adventure

Forcing themself to be someone they aren't anymore

That's about it for this analysis, again I apologize if I've basically gotten EVERYTHING wrong and this doesn't actually make any sense... as I said I haven't done a character analysis in a long time, so I should have probably looked deeper into the whole thing, but this was, again, more of what I've personally gathered from my own experience of the game

I do hope you still enjoyed it, though!!

[untoldreader]

A Fateful Encounter

Summary

The reader's path crosses with Maria Hill's in an unexpected twist of fate, setting the stage for a deep connection to form

Warnings

None

Tag List

@alexawynters

The bustling streets of New York City pulsed with energy as I made my way through the crowd, my heart and mind consumed by the daily grind. It was just another ordinary day, or so I thought. Little did I know that destiny had a different plan in store for me.

Lost in my thoughts, I absentmindedly looked up and our eyes met. There she was, Maria Hill, a formidable presence with her piercing blue eyes and confident aura. In that instant, something shifted within me. It was as if time stood still, and the world around us faded into the background. It was a connection that seemed to transcend mere coincidence.

I stumbled, caught off guard by the intensity of the moment. "I'm sorry," I managed to utter, my voice barely a whisper in the bustling city sounds.

Maria's stern expression softened, and a faint smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "No need to apologize," she replied, her voice carrying a warmth I hadn't expected.

As she walked away, the memory of her gaze lingered, stirring something deep within my heart. It was a feeling I couldn't shake—the sense that this encounter held a profound significance, that I had just crossed paths with someone who would change the course of my life.

Days turned into weeks, and I found myself yearning for another glimpse of Maria. I caught myself daydreaming, imagining what it would be like to be in her presence once more, to explore the depths of our connection. And fate, it seemed, had plans to bring us together again.

One evening, a message arrived, shrouded in secrecy, with the sender's identity concealed. "Meet me at the coordinates below. Trust your heart," it read.

Intrigued and filled with a mixture of anticipation and nervous excitement, I couldn't resist the pull of the unknown. I followed the coordinates to a secluded spot, where Maria awaited me, a glimmer of anticipation in her eyes.

"You came," she said softly, a hint of surprise in her voice.

I nodded, unable to contain the emotions swirling within me. "There was something about you," I confessed, my voice trembling with honesty. "Something that drew me in from the very beginning."

A smile played upon Maria's lips, a subtle acknowledgment of the undeniable connection we shared. "I felt it too," she replied, her voice filled with a tenderness I hadn't seen before. "There's a love that defies explanation, a devotion that binds us together. Are you willing to explore what it means?"

In that moment, I knew that there was no turning back. The love between us had ignited, a flame that burned with an intensity I had never experienced before. With unwavering resolve, I met her gaze and whispered, "Yes, Maria. I'm ready to dive into the depths of this love, to embrace the devotion that binds us."

And so, with that heartfelt affirmation, our journey began. Little did we know the challenges that awaited us, the tests our love would face, and the strength of devotion that would be required to overcome them.

As days turned into weeks, Maria and I found ourselves inseparable. We explored the city together, hand in hand, discovering hidden gems and sharing our deepest thoughts and dreams. With each passing day, our love grew stronger, expanding like tendrils intertwining our hearts.

Maria's presence in my life brought a sense of stability and purpose that I had never known before. She was my rock, my confidante, and my partner in every sense of the word. We faced the world together, supporting each other through the highs and lows, and celebrating every triumph as a team.

But amidst our joy, shadows loomed on the horizon. Maria's work with S.H.I.E.L.D. demanded her unwavering commitment and often placed her in dangerous situations. Our love was tested as we navigated the complexities of her duty and the sacrifices it required.

There were nights when I lay awake, my heart heavy with worry, waiting for Maria to return safely from her missions. Each time she walked through the door, unharmed but wearied by the weight of her responsibilities, I held her tightly, cherishing every moment as if it were our last.

But even in the face of adversity, our devotion remained steadfast. We chose to embrace the love that bound us, to find solace in each other's arms and draw strength from our connection. It was a love that defied logic, that defied the odds stacked against us.

As the months turned into years, Maria and I built a life together—a life filled with love, laughter, and shared dreams. We supported each other's ambitions, pushing each other to reach new heights. Our devotion was not just romantic; it was a commitment to nurturing the growth and happiness of the other.

Yet, with every passing day, the world continued to change. New challenges arose, threatening the delicate balance we had created. Forces beyond ourcontrol tested our devotion, pushing us to our limits.

One such challenge came when Maria received a top-secret assignment that would take her away for an extended period. It was a mission of utmost importance, one that required her expertise and unwavering dedication. As she shared the news with me, her eyes were filled with a mix of determination and sadness.

"I don't want to leave you," Maria whispered, her voice choked with emotion. "But this is something I have to do. It's my duty."

Tears welled up in my eyes as I fought to hold them back. I understood the weight of her responsibility, but it didn't make the impending separation any easier to bear. "I'll be waiting for you," I replied, my voice filled with a conviction born out of our love. "No matter how long it takes, my heart is yours, and I'll be here when you return."

With a heavy heart, I watched Maria depart, knowing that our love would be tested in ways we couldn't yet comprehend. Time stretched on, and the days turned into weeks, then months. The ache of her absence was a constant companion, a reminder of the love we shared and the sacrifices we made.

During those long months apart, we relied on letters and occasional encrypted messages to bridge the physical distance between us. Each word penned on paper carried the weight of our devotion, the longing we felt, and the unwavering commitment to each other.

In those letters, we poured our hearts out—sharing our triumphs, our fears, and our hopes for the future. We supported each other from afar, offering words of encouragement and love that transcended the limitations of distance. Despite the challenges we faced, our connection remained unbreakable.

Finally, the day arrived when Maria's mission was complete, and she returned to my waiting arms. The joy that flooded my heart was indescribable as we embraced, the weight of our separation melting away in that single moment of reunion. We had weathered the storm, and our devotion had emerged stronger than ever.

But the challenges didn't end there. Life continued to test us, throwing unexpected obstacles in our path. Yet, with each trial, we leaned on the foundation of our love and commitment, strengthening our bond and reaffirming our devotion.

Together, we navigated the complexities of life—supporting each other through career changes, personal losses, and the ever-changing landscape of the world. Our love was a beacon of light in the darkest of times, guiding us through the storms and reminding us of the unwavering connection we shared.

As the years passed, Maria and I built a life filled with cherished memories and shared experiences. We celebrated milestones, big and small, with hearts brimming with gratitude for the love we had found in each other.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

And so, our love story continues—a testament to the power of devotion and the resilience of the human spirit. Our journey is not without its challenges, but we face them together, bound by a love that knows no bounds.

For in the end, it is the devotion between us that sustains and nourishes our love, a flame that burns bright against all odds. Together, we embrace the unknown, knowing that as long as we have each other, love will always prevail.

Are we liking this?

[rocicrew]

for the prompt list: Alex/Holden #32 <3

prompt: “My patience is wearing thin”

Holden was tired. The kind of bone-deep tiredness that doesn't go away with sleep. Not that he was getting much of it in the first place. Not after the Cant, Eros... The Hybrid... Going back to an empty bed... Even with enough painkillers in his system to knock him out for two shift cycles. 

He dealt with it, more or less. Tried not to put too much weight on his leg and silently thanked Alex for the low third of a G he kept the Roci's gravity. At least, when they're not rescuing high-ranking Earther politicians and rogues Martians.

He attempted to mind his reactions to others. The past few weeks he had been less than an ideal Captain, let alone crewmate. Though, attempt was the keyword. He still hadn't managed it fully. He had yelled at Alex, snapped at Naomi, and Avasarala had kept pestering him about getting once more involved in the war. He already had a long list of regrets to make up for, he didn't need another thing to screw up.

He was so tired. 

So much, in fact, that he didn't notice Alex walking into the galley before he spoke.

"Oh, hey Hoss," Alex greeted while removing his headphones. "Didn't expect to find you here so early."

"It's quiet," Holden offered in return, even though, it was less of an explanation and more of a cop-out answer. 

Alex just nodded, taking in his answer. If Holden had paid more attention, he'd have noticed him working the courage to ask him the following question. But instead, it'd just caught him off-guard. 

"You doing okay? I mean with your leg and everything going on... It's... It's got to be... rough, right?"

"I'm sorry," Holden replied instead, which only confused Alex. He didn't get it and Holden as much as he'd like to, knew he couldn't avoid talking about it head-on. "About earlier," he started and then cut himself off because earlier didn't even begin to describe it. There were so many times earlier could describe, and the bitterness he felt had nothing to do with the cup of coffee in front of it. "I yelled at you, again. I keep taking it out on you, on this crew for weeks, and- I'm sorry." 

What more could he say besides genuinely apologizing?

"It's all right," Alex said and was cheery enough to smile at him. Of all the ways he thought this conversation would go, a dismissal hadn't crossed his mind as a possibility. 

"It's not-"

"Look, Eros did a number on us. You most of all. I understand you are not being exactly yourself. And everything after... I mean, we've got the UN Undersecretary running around the ship suddenly, and Nao-" Alex cut himself off looking apologetic. "What I mean is, how are you really feeling?"

Holden made a comical expression; a mix of a shrug, raised brows, and twisted lips, that could only begin to describe the pool of emotions that swam in the cavity of his chest. "My patience is wearing thin."

Alex nodded, taking it in, and slowly sipped from his bulb. "Yeah, could tell you that much," he said and Holden immediately winced, pointedly avoiding making eye contact with the broken coffee machine.

He wasn't proud of it, or any of his latest behavior but the only thing he could do was accept the consequences. It hurt more than he wanted to acknowledge that after everything Naomi couldn't trust him. It hurt because he did trust her wholly. In the middle of every terrible, shitty thing they went through, he knew he could turn to her. At a time when he couldn't even trust his own body not to fail him, he believed Naomi wouldn't. 

None of it was fair. She was her own person with her own demons and as much as they tried to ignore everything else and distract one another, it was bound to blow into their faces. 

And she'd taken the one thing that kept him up at night. The one thing he hadn't been able to leave back to Eros after escaping.

But hearing her explanation, knowing he reminded her of- Just the thought made him sick. No matter how many times he could say that he wasn't like that, that he could never hurt her like that and mean it, wouldn't erase his failure. His failure to be a better crewman, a better partner, a better person. 

"Sorry Jim, I didn't mean it like that," Alex was quick to try and smooth over the sudden shift in the atmosphere. 

A better son. 

"Avasarala mentioned my mom," Holden blurted out. "One of my mothers, Elise."

He stopped not knowing how to say the rest. About leaving and running, and the guilt that was always present. He knew what she was doing and he fell for it anyway. 

"How many years has it been?" Alex asked instead.

Jim didn't do the math. That would weigh on him more. "I left when I was eighteen." 

Left. Like it was a choice. Like he would've been enough otherwise.

They've talked since then, of course. They managed to have a steady communication before the shitstorm happened.

He still hadn't looked up toward Alex until he heard the other speak.

"Yeah, I know a thing or two about leaving people behind," Alex said and a sharp memory of the picture with Alex's wife and son hit him out of nowhere. Right, Alex had left a son (and so had Naomi-). What right did he have t- "I'm not proud of it, but... you can love your family with everything you have and still... find your place somewhere else."

The lump in his throat disappeared, and he reached out to cover Alex's hand and squeezed.

"Even if that place's captain is sometimes an asshole?"

"As long as you don't break the oven next, we're good," Alex joked.

"Hey, that's-" Holden protested.

"Deserved," Alex argued back.

"A little, yeah..."

They didn't solve anything but he felt lighter anyway.

"So, uh," Alex started again. "Naomi said she'd come to talk to you. Did you two... y'know..."

They were having this kind of talk now... Holden took a sip from his coffee to brace himself and began replying in broad strokes. Naomi's story was hers. But he could talk about them in general.

They stayed in the galley for a long time talking until their hand terminals chimed and reality found its way back to them.

[theshipscommander]

Hi 👋, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔

I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $40,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future.

Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶

If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏

Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤️‍🩹

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗

Hello! I would like to apologize for taking so long to reply to you. I have been so busy with school and my health. While I am unable to donate currently, I will spread your go fund me to everyone I know and everyone I can. My friends care about Palestine as well.

[paixarina]

Hi 👋, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔

I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $40,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future. 🕊️🇵🇸

Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶

If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏

Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗

hello, i greatly apologize for the late reply, i will put your donation link here:

may god protect you, your family and every palestinians who still face the genocide out there, free palestine.

[owlstronomer]

           Her laughter is a balm, rushing over wounds still open and aching. A testament they both knew all too well, that time does not in fact, heal all wounds. But the heat that smarted his fingers suddenly subsided, replaced with a wash of relief. It still felt surreal to be sitting across from her now.            It never ceases to amaze him, how remarkable she is. Perhaps he is biased, even now after being separated for so long, made into strangers by the passage of time and the pain he's gifted her. She is still something incredible, something wildly untouchable and unfathomable in all of the right, true, and incredible ways. Stolas averts his gaze once their hands shake and her statement follows. A solemn sip from his cup and a nod are offered before he speaks. "Yes. . . . I am sorry for that as well. I suppose I should have prepared you better, but I do not regret giving you time to simply. . . come into your own, if that makes any sense. But it was terrible of me on my part to leave you so blindsided to it all."            Stolas turns the simple band around his finger. It suddenly feels too tight. He fights the urge to remove and pocket it, to hide it from her and even his own fractured little heart. He chews on his reply, weighing the words and wades through them like a current of water he can't rise out of. There were no easy answers to her question, no simple phrases or explanations that would make any of it better. Nothing he says can undo the harm he has done to her, to himself, to others, or even to their relationship. He knows this, and wants to say just that. But she wants an answer and awaits a reply, and truth be told. . . . He owes everything to her. Most of all, he owes an attempt at answering any question she poses; he owes her the truth. It is the bare minimum of what she could possibly request, and the least he can do. He takes a trembling breath and folds both hands around his own cup before meeting her gaze.

           "You should know that anything I say, everything I say, will pale in comparison to the pain and betrayal you feel. I cannot make this right or undo what I have done, Octavia. I am. . . aware of that. But you are asking one of the hardest questions. You should know, that in those moments, I never thought about it as a You or Him ultimatum. By all means, I should have, and you have every right to feel betrayed. I did betray you. No amount of apologies can rectify that mistake." Stolas gives pause here, running a hand through the feathers atop his head.

         "In the moment, it was an easy decision to make, to rush to his aid and take responsibility. After all, it was I who. . . initiated the terms of our agreement and leant the Grimoire to Blitz. It was easy to lay my life down to prevent a cruel and unnecessary loss of life. However, I have. . . . had a lot of time to reflect. I understand that, well, everything I have done up to that point was a terrible form of misconduct, a betrayal to you, and to what my work should have been. I have committed far more wrongs than I have rights, and each of them weighs upon my shoulders with varying intensity. None more so than those that did both you and Blitz the most harm. I am. . . still learning, still working on bettering myself."

           Afraid of what he might see, of how she might look at him, Stolas lowers his gaze. Trembling hands are moved to hide their unsteadiness, slowly guided into his lap instead. The gentle burn of tears begins in pupiled carmine pools. His chest heaves. "It was easy for me to save his life. It was not easy to lose you in process. I - I thought about you, in those seconds I laid my neck upon the block and waited. Stars, Octavia, you filled every inch of my mind and my heart, and when they spoke of my exile and stripped me of my powers. . . . You were the only one I thought of. I am truly sorry. I not only betrayed your trust and made you doubt your own self-worth, but I abandoned you when you needed me most. So this," He gestures between them with a broken smile, "means so much to me. That you are sharing your time with me at all. Please, please, ask anything you want. I will. . . . do my best to provide answers."

( This is a mistake. ) Thoughts bubble in the back of her mind - threatening to tear poised composure apart. ( He's lied to you before.. What would make this any different? ) Octavia wants to give the man she once called father a chance. A chance to mend what was broken. A leap of faith, as one would call it. Octavia merely prayed to whatever dark Gods laid below that this would not be a fatal mistake.

A daughter's heart could only be broken so many times before it became irreparable.

A small hoot of laughter came of watching the scene before her. It dawned on her, the first time Octavia has genuinely laughed in what seems like eons. Carefully, she worked to pop the top of the paper cup, trying to keep from a scalding drop to burn preened feathers. Slow & deliberate blows of air to cool the surface of coffee before she turned her attention to the honey ; pouring a small amount to offer the sweetness she craved before stirring to dissolve. What she hadn't expected was the hand extended towards her, expectedly for her to shake.

Octavia stared for a short time, remembering that the first time in nearly a hundred years.. she was re-meeting her own father. Her hand extended, a gentle grip and chaste shake. ❝ A pleasure, truly, Stolas. ❞ A rehearsed response, one of expectation born down. A lot of things change in such a short time, so it seems. ( He'll lie to you. ) ❝ You left large expectations to be filled. I didn't know how to handle most of them on my own. ❞ Her own admission, of gaining so much & earning so little all at once. Octavia never truly felt adequate, for no one would truly take his place. She made do with what she could - it felt so heavy.

( The truth will hurt more than pretty lies. )

❝ I just.. want to know why. Why.. you did what you did. He needed you.. but so did I. Was it that easy to toss me aside for him..? ❞

[thebreakfastgenie]

The era that FOB is writing about has a pretty clear and obvious cut off — you have to skip a few of the important precursors and it means it doesn’t follow on from WDSTF as neatly but. Well. 2001 is a very clear demarcation point in US history for a number of reasons, 9/11 being one of the most stark (but also the simple fact that 2001 nearly marks the beginning of the new millennium; and yes I am one of those people who believes the millennium starts at 001 not 000.) To my knowledge, one of the defining features of the millenial generation is whether you were in school during 2001.

But if they had done that we would have lost 12 years from the end of 1989 to 2001, not to mention some of those precursor events I alluded to that happened in the 90s that feel more at home in discussions about the post-2001 era than in the pre-1989 era. So I suppose that’s why they picked up exactly where Joel left off — but it leads to considerable inelegance.

And apologies yes I did misunderstand what you meant; I thought you were asking a similar question with extremely different connotations. With that in mind no there is no good comparison.

The thing I think is important to consider here is that the other comments you have criticised about an “updated” version of WDSTF are not relevant to this particular cover. Your criticisms are correct and valid but that is not what FOB were trying to do here. But to be clear I am not saying that because I think it excuses FOB from criticism — I think it simply invites a different kind of criticism.

But to answer your question of why use WDSTF if the goal was to achieve something very different: I think it’s because WDSTF is a cultural touchstone. So in a way I think what FOB might be doing is saying, well, this is a song about the things that have happened in your lifetime, the culturally important ones and the ones you remember, and it’s about how every generation is ultimately carried along by the tide of history. (Note: apologies if you feel I have mischaracterised the song here.) And then by doing their non-chronological cover, they are saying; this feels true for us too; but now society feels separated from the chronology of these events. When did this happen? Did this happen first or that? Who can tell because it’s all being discussed like it’s all happening at once. Sandy Hook happens and it means we talk about Columbine again. And so on.

The reason why they would do that and not write their own song is — well, to be generous towards them; to use the cultural understanding of WDSTF as a jumping off point so they don’t have to as heavily lay the groundwork for the themes of their rewrite. The uncharitable version is marketing, to get the $$$ from “hey look, we did our own version of WDSTF”.

I appreciate that you actually provided a reasoning here! It does make some sense. I think 12 years is an awful big chunk of time for "precursors," though, so that inelegance is a significant black mark for me.

I guess I do feel a bit like the end result of all those "haha we need a new WDSTF" memes I dislike (I grumpily replied to many of them) is a famous band deciding to actually do it and that's what this is which does predispose me to dislike it.

It would be interesting to see if Fall Out Boy actually supplies this or any other reasoning for their choices, because while I think that's a good explanation for why they might have ditched the the chronology, I don't think that message was clear from the song itself. I'm also assuming they kept the chorus and I'm not sure "when did this happen?" fits well with the sort of "everything happens in cycles" vibe of "it was always burning since the world's been turning."

I appreciate the perspective that they were trying to do something but I still don't like what they did.

[jaozendry]

"Don't worry, I'm here for you."

Pairing: Garfield Logan x GN!Reader

Type: Fluff

Warnings: swearing, mild angst, self-harm

Summary: Garfield notices as you struggle completing homework due to lack of motivation. He decides to help you with said homework and catch up a little. He wants to understand what's troubling you.

______________________________________________________________

It's 11 PM, everyone in the Titans Tower is already sleeping, except you. You're already behind in assignments and you're wondering if you can even complete anything before tomorrow. As your pen dances around your math homework and sweat drips on your forehead, you hear footsteps coming towards your room. Someone knocks on the door: It's Gar.

"Hey Y/N, you ok?" he asks as he opens the door. "I just heard pounding from my room and was wondering if something happened."

"Yeah, it's just, you know, homework and shit." you reply, admitting defeat against the math sheet standing in front of you. "Algebra, is it? I can help, don't worry."

As the green-haired boy sits next to you, he notices the giant bags beneath your eyes and the red marks on your arms. He looks up to you, concern welling up in his beautiful eyes. He knows it's not the right time to talk about it, nor do you have the patience to at the moment. He smiles faintly and begins reading through your paper.

______________________________________________________________

It's been almost an hour since he started helping you and you have yet to understand a single thing. He had to wake you up by running his hand through your hair in a very calm and understanding manner on multiple occasions before you woke up and apologized softly. He doesn't blame you for falling asleep during his explanations, he knows how much effort you've been putting in today, especially during training. Dick thinks you've been falling off a little bit lately, so he practically doubled your training sessions. Gar tried to talk him out of it, telling him it was insane and that you had school, but he wouldn't listen to reason. This drastic change led you to where you are now, unmotivated and constantly falling asleep.

"So, this is basically how you do number 9. Do you get it?" he asks after checking the time. You don't respond and your eyes start welling up from fatigue.

"It's almost midnight. You should take a break." he suggests as he stands up.

"A break?" you ask, your voice breaking. "I can't take a break, Gar. I have two late assignements, three more pages of algebra to complete for tomorrow and an exam next week! And I have yet to understand anything! I've been falling asleep during class because Dick doubled my fucking training! I don't understand anything, do you get it Gar?! I can't focus, I can't do anything these days!" You hide your face with your hands, ashamed as to what just happened.

Your boyfriend sits down again and takes your hand, caressing your scarred arm. He looks down at it, tears dwelling up. He looks at you again and hugs you, telling you it will be okay.

"Look, Y/N, I can do your homework for tomorrow. I'll talk Dick out of it, I'll even force him to stop giving you more training if I have to. I'll get Rachel and Kory on my side. I'll help you understand algebra, I'm pretty good at it. We'll spend time together every day. On the other hand, I would like you to promise two things for me." he tells you, his voice breaking slightly and wiping his eyes. You nod as he wipes the tears away from your eyes.

"First off, I need you to sleep properly. I can't have those bags ruin your beautiful eyes." he says, earning a giggle from you. "Secondly, I need you to stop doing... this... to yourself." he explains while looking at your arm again and holding your hand tight. "Promise me?" You nod in silence. He kisses your forehead and stands up to leave. You stop him by calling out his name.

"Can you lay next to me until I fall asleep? I just... need company. Please." you ask. He agrees and you feel your heart skip a beat. This is the first time you'll be sleeping together since the start of your relationship.

You close the light on your desk and jump onto your bed, exhausted. Garfield sits next to you. You decide to lay your head on his leg while he runs through your hair and scratches your back. This is the most relaxed you've felt this week, maybe even this month.

"I love you." he says.

You reply softly:

“Me too."

[more-than-a-princess]

"You do not need to apologize to me," Sonia replied, carefully and with a kind look, a warm smile in the direction of a woman who seemingly could not bear to look at her. "You have not hurt me, Yaguchi-san. And I have stated my thoughts on the matter of your intention and will in the face of Junko Enoshima's machinations."

The girl who had attended Hope's Peak Academy might not have believed it, but the woman who sat in the sand found herself able to lie with considerable ease. If it was for the sake of someone else, anyone besides her own personal interest. Because Shinobu Yaguchi had hurt her, so many years ago: in ways she either didn't fully understand or wouldn't fully accept, the needs of her family and responsibilities to her country outweighing facing the honest truth that she had fallen in love with a woman and, despite every method she'd used to talk herself out of pursuing a romance she desired, it had been Shinobu herself to dissolve the entire friendship itself, much less the possibility for anything else.

But this wasn't about her: despite dresses she and her mother hadn't worn in years, or the photographs, or the notes being passed to Novosonian journalists to properly detail the success of Princess Sonia's tour of Jabberwock Island, it was never about her. It was about the Remnants of Despair, many of them people she'd once considered friends. It was about Shinobu, and reuniting her with the last of her family who desperately wanted her back. It was not about her, or her memories, or what she'd lost so long ago.

So she had to smile. Smile, and do everything in her power to remind Shinobu that she'd been manipulated and her actions were directed by someone else to cause pain and suffering, and not her own will. Even if the truth dictated otherwise: she wanted to hurt Sonia and remove her from her life, though she remembered none of it.

"You say you had violent misery in you," She continued, looking out over the water and at her still, unmoving fishing line. There was something humbling about it: being the heir to the throne in one of the few countries seemingly untouched by The Tragedy, and yet not managing to even do something as simple as catching a fish. "But I remember, when I was friends with Anzu-san and we were acquainted, that you conveyed how you fed the koi fish on your estate. It was something that you never forgot to do and the fish were always grateful for you. Now, perhaps it is due to my time spent with Gundham," Sonia paused, considering leaving the explanation there but with the jumbled memories of the Remnants, Shinobu included, she probably needed to add the surname. "Tanaka, but I do not believe that people who are kind to animals are in possession of violent misery with a potential to become a loathsome killer. Anzu-san was always intent on mentioning that you contained a gentler disposition than you let on. I like to believe that is still true."

And skills Sonia herself just didn't possess. She let out a sigh at the line, which barely bobbed in the waves. Maybe she just wasn't enticing enough for fish, and she never had been. "Sorry, I was told not to bring up too much of the past when you all do not remember it, nor to expect you to do so or hold any of it in high regard," She apologized, beginning to reel back the line. This was pointless, when Shinobu was far more skilled at it. "But I was not sure how else to describe my stance. "You do not need to try and recall any of it, it is in the past now anyway."

It was better to focus on the present, that Shinobu desired to be around her former classmates instead of locked away in her cabin. Sonia listened and nodded, making mental notes of what she needed done before deciding the best way to do it. Going through Byakuya Togami would likely be the most successful: he had the most to lose by denying her requests.

"I would urge you not to discount what you've achieved so far, including today," Sonia advised, still trying to find Shinobu's gaze with her own. But she seemed determined not to look at her, as if even though she likely didn't remember throwing Sonia's friendship back in her face she still felt the same way she did back then. "You have not wanted to hurt me now, nor the others in our company. I rather assume you would treat your former classmates with far more warmth and tenderness than a stranger like me. I do not see why wanting to share meals with them, swim, and see movies in the theater is an unreasonable request. The cabin rules may take more time to unravel, but I believe that your behavior and my methods of negotiation will be an effective combination. Do not lose heart, Yaguchi-san!"

With Anzu still in her coma, Shinobu likely had no one on her side to support her. And that was if Anzu was in any state to, considering what she and all of them had endured. That would be enough for Sonia, it had to be enough, as she got to her feet and brushed the sand from the seat of her dress the best she could. It likely needed a thorough cleaning, something they wouldn't be able to manage on the boat or the island. She'd planned to leave Shinobu with that thought, that hope, that afternoon, but it seemed that the former archer would get in the last word. Sonia turned to look over her shoulder, giving her a smile: relieved and warm.

"I will keep that in mind for our future ventures," She replied honestly. "That you are not necessarily worn out of my company yet. Please ensure you check outside your cabin door in the morning, too. I will have some things sent over tonight for your use and enjoyment. Good day, Yaguchi-san."

True to her word, a basket will materialize on Shinobu's cabin doorstep overnight: a few novels likely not found in the Jabberwock Island library, a canister of vaseline for her burns and fresh bandages, a bottle of disinfectant, and several cans of iced coffee and bags of ground coffee beans from Novoselic. The latter had been mostly on request by Byakuya Togami, but Sonia was certain that a few packages going amiss would be unnoticed.

"I don't think that's true," they muttered. "I'll be apologizing forever, I imagine." Because it was expected of her, because it was demanded. When, she didn't know, but soon enough she'd be returned to Japan to sit in a small room with dozens of people who held in their hands her fate and her future. Already, Shinobu Yaguchi knew it was a pointless endeavor. Regardless of explanations and or mitigating factors, regardless of any words put in on her behalf by the likes of Naegi and the others, she wouldn't be allowed to return home. It was sensible, really. After what she'd done, what politician would risk political capital on bringing her back, armed with the knowledge as they were that they would likely be among her first targets if she returned to her old ways?

And yet, in that small room, surrounded by those many people, it would be the bare minimum that she prostrate herself and apologize until it had long-since lost all meaning. What else was there to do about it? "I have more reason to apologize than the others, anyway." She shivered, from her position beside the princess in the sand. "To everyone, yourself included." For the thoughts that had once consumed her, if for no other reason. Although, surely there were other reasons. No doubt Sonia had lost friends or family or other such intimate people during the Tragedy, and it would be easier to lay that at Shinobu's feet than anyone else's. Perhaps it wasn't altogether awful to be so hated, if it meant that everyone else might be treated more leniently.

"I know that it's the opinion of some particularly forgiving people that what was done to my classmates and myself absolves us of any responsibility, but I shouldn't be included in that." Her head dipped down, eyes looking at her hands. That strip of scarred, burned flesh around her ring finger wouldn't soon heal, would it? An ever-present reminder, second only to the steady beating of the heart in her chest. "I think, Nevermind-san, that I always had this sort of potential in me. Regarding the others... Someone like Murasame, or Ayaka, never would have taken part in such horribly evil acts, had their minds been intact."

No, and among them, Shinobu couldn't really imagine any who could, aside from perhaps Matsuda with his twisted personality. Even then, though, wasn't he less suited to mass homicide, and more akin to garden variety cruelty, or the typical sexism of men who both loved and hated women? "I don't feel the same way about myself. There was a violent misery inside me from the start. I always had the potential to become that sort of person, a loathsome killer with little regard for others. Junko simply gave me the tools, and a convenient excuse." Many of the others tried to avoid saying her name altogether, while others used language to enforce as much distance as possible. In Shinobu's case, it seemed more work than was worth it to hide the fact that her first name felt far more natural on her lips - even if she could resist the urge to add any adoring honorifics.

"Though, that doesn't mean I have no desire to be close to my classmates," she mumbled as though it were an afterthought, still looking down at her hands. "It would be more pleasant if I were able to spend more time with them. Especially as more of them are woken up." How it would feel to be around Anzu, in particular, they had no idea. Her reaction would be whatever it was in the moment, though she harbored a silent hope that, even after everything, they could find a way to be friends once again. Perhaps there were chances with the others, as well. She'd become close to Ayaka, closer than they'd been in school, through the simulation. Given the chance, maybe it was possible with more than just her.

Finally, she looked back up, watching as Sonia's fishing line laid loose over the water, completely ignored by whichever fish were swimming by. "I know they eat meals together, often, and in the evenings, sometimes they swim in the pool, or watch movies at the theater. Those sorts of typical activities." She swallowed. Her mouth felt so dry. Perhaps this was the most they'd spoken to someone else since coming to the island, isolated as they were, and uninterested as the Future Foundation agents were in their company. "My work keeps me busy, and I doubt that has any chance of changing in the near future." As more of her classmates arose from their medically-induced slumber, it would only be more important to ensure proper nutrition for everyone.

Looking to Sonia, in a way, Shinobu wasn't quite sure where to rest her eyes. It was common advice to look at one's forehead, if eye contact was too difficult, but that still seemed too much like treatment between equals. To look at her chest, though, was entirely imprudent, leaving Shinobu to settle her gaze upon Sonia's shoulder - halfway between looking at her, and looking altogether past her. "I expect it will be more difficult to resolve than the matter of my chain, but, I'm locked inside my cabin in the evening, until it's time to work the following morning." It was easier that way, rather than having Future Foundation agents looking after her to ensure she didn't take some sort of rash action on her own under the dark of the night sky. "But, if that could be relaxed, even if I've done little to deserve it, I'd be grateful, Nevermind-san."

As Sonia stood to leave, Shinobu's attention followed her, haunted red eyes catching sight of the Sonia's blue ones, striking and yet gentle all the same, before she abruptly looked back down. "You don't have to leave, Nevermind-san, it's-" No, if she thought about it carefully, it was clearly just Sonia trying to be polite. She had more important things to do than sit on a beach with a depressive war criminal, surely. "Of course. You must be very busy, and I've surely occupied enough of your time already. I wouldn't want to further monopolize it." It was be unfair of any of the remnants to do so, let alone Shinobu in particular. "And, if you want to bring things to me, I can't pretend to understand why you'd care to, but I won't refuse."

[emeraldiis]

Pillow Talk

A/N: i will never apologize for being horny on main

AO3 Link

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 3.4k

Summary: After an entire day of staring at you in that bikini, Loki is left utterly desperate for release. Good thing he sleeps with a lot of pillows.

Tags: masturbation, phone sex, pillow humping, needy!Loki, pining

Loki shifted on the bed, mashing his face roughly into the satin pillow case. It was nearly dawn, and he hadn’t slept. Even the tiniest hint of sleep had evaded him, and he’d tossed and turned enough to make his muscles ache in protest. With a frustrated growl, he rolled onto his back and pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes until he saw stars. This was never going to work.

He had no one to blame but himself for his insomnia. Really, it was pathetic, the way his mind had latched onto one silly little human and made her the object of his obsession. You with your silky hair and soft eyes, keeping him up until the morning hours. Your melodic voice rang in his eardrums, and every time he closed his eyes, he’d see that perfect skin of yours and wish it was pressed up against--

With a gasp, Loki swiftly brought his hands down to grasp the sheets in agony. He wished he could blame it on the fact that he hadn’t bed anyone in at least a decade, but he knew himself. Celibacy had never been an issue for him in the past; he wasn’t a teenage boy, he could control his needs. But you had him feeling like one all over again. The way he gawked at you like it was his first time seeing a pair of breasts nearly spill out of a way-too-tight tank top, it was downright shameful. You were just so innocent, so pure, and he longed to see that smile collapse into a pout as you whimpered against his lips.

Despite his best efforts, Loki could feel his cock throb in renewed need. It had been begging for release nearly all night, and Loki had successfully ignored it so far. He held steady in his determination in not giving in, but his resolve was slipping. Today has been especially tortuous. Tony and his goddamn insistence that Loki participate in team bonding. A day at the beach, one which Loki spent lounging in the hot sand shielding his eyes from the blinding sun. You had splashed around in the waves with Natasha and bounced around in a bikini that seemed specifically designed to torture Loki. The bottoms had shifted themselves to ride up quite a few times, and Loki had taken pleasure in watching you reach back with slippery fingers to pull them out of your ass.

Loki’s cock throbbed again, almost violently this time. He moaned softly into the open air. The sound was pained, and Loki felt his hand begin to drift towards the string of his pajama bottoms. They were silk, and because Loki had chosen to forgo underwear, the soft material felt like heaven against his swollen erection. Before his fingers could slip inside to where he needed them most, Loki ripped them away in defiance and turned onto his side, tangling the blanket between his legs as he rolled. The pressure of the thick comforter into his crotch made Loki suck in a surprised breath. His hips twitched upward of their own accord and Loki’s eyes fluttered in pleasure.

Loki could feel his will dissolving with every jolt of pleasure that swam up his spin. His mind spun with images of you: you curled up against him, reaching back with your dainty hand to pull him closer to you, encouraging him to grind against your backside. As if he was in a daze, Loki grabbed one of the many pillows adorning his bed and shoved it between his legs. The firmness of the pillow was so much more satisfying than the blanket, and Loki groaned.

It was over, he had accepted defeat. Loki was about to hump his pillow like an animal and it was all your fault. He thought of that wet bikini sticking to your skin, your breasts bouncing as you jogged back up the beach to him and breathed out a “what’s up” like he wasn’t about to cum in his swim trunks just from watching you. As the memories danced through his head, Loki’s hips began to roll in more deliberate motions. With every thrust, his cock pressed up against the soft material of his pants. Loki could feel the pre-cum wetting the silk, but it only served to amplify his pleasure as the damp fabric clung to his skin.

The buzzing of his phone startled Loki out of his fantasies, and he nearly wanted to throw the thing against the wall. Tony would get him a new one, as he always did no matter how many times that Loki had insisted they were unnecessary devices. As much as he wanted to let it ring, Loki had learned that calls at this hour usually meant an unexpected mission, and he’d be back on house arrest if he didn’t answer. Loki reluctantly leaned over to his bedside table to grab the vibrating object, keeping the pillow between his legs. His heart came to a near stop as he saw your name illuminated on the screen.

A few moments passed as Loki stared dry-mouthed at the caller ID, wondering when he had fallen asleep. Because the only explanation for you calling him in the middle of the night was that he was dreaming. Sure, you had texted him the occasional internet video that you thought he’d enjoy, but had never called him. And certainly not at five in the morning. With a hard swallow, Loki hit the “accept call” button and waited.

“Hey, Loki?” Came your tired-sounding voice. It wasn’t as gorgeous when muffled by the phone static, but it gave Loki shivers nonetheless.

“What is this about?” Loki tried to sound as irritated as possible, figuring that would be the proper reaction to receiving a call this early. The truth was that he was elated to hear your voice, and was disgusted by himself. A mortal, making him this weak in the knees, it was absolutely pathetic.

You were silent for a moment. “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t sleep. I-I’m not really sure why I called you, I’m sorry for waking you up. I’ll just--”

“Wait!” Loki burst out before you could end the call. His loud voice echoed back at him in the silent room and he cringed, hoping that no one had heard him. Loki bit his lip anxiously, uncertain of what to say to keep you on the line. “Um, I was awake. I couldn’t sleep either.”

“Oh, I guess that’s good. Well, not really good that you can’t sleep, I mean good that I didn’t wake you.”

Loki chuckled at your awkward ramblings. Norns, you were so cute. “Don’t worry, pet, I know what you meant.” As the words left his lips, Loki’s eyes widened as he realized what he’d just called you. Pet. It had been a slip of the tongue, but it brought forth a whole new round of fantasies. He couldn’t help but imagine about what it would be like to own you, to grab you by your pretty face and push his cock between your lips over and over. Absent-mindedly, Loki began to move his hips against the pillow again. He had to bite down on his tongue to keep from gasping. As quietly as he could manage, he put the call on speaker and set the phone down beside him so he could lie back on his side and resume his earlier activities. Loki knew it was so, so wrong to do this while you were none-the-wiser, but he couldn’t help it. He had been so worked up for so long and now it was like his body had taken over, hell bent on getting the relief it needed.

“So, why couldn’t you sleep?”

“Oh, just lost in my thoughts, I suppose,” Loki said as his eyes fell shut. His voice was the slightest bit strained, the soft drag of his pants against his cock making it hard to focus.

“Yeah, same here.” You sighed into the phone, and Loki heard a bit of rustling as you presumably got more comfortable. “I have trouble sleeping a lot, actually. I guess I just get lonely.”

A heavy weight of guilt sank into Loki’s chest. Here you were, opening yourself up to him, and he was trying to get off to the sound of your voice. He was truly depraved, that was for sure. But fuck, the tired rasp to your voice and the small sighs you let out were sending him sky high. His mind was running wild with fantasies of you under him, you in his lap, you up against the wall as he fucked you into it. Loki fought to sound normal as he responded to you. “I understand. Most beings are very social creatures, we need company to--ah!” A particularly rough thrust of his hips had caught Loki off guard as the mind-numbing pleasure rocketed through his body.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, pet,” Loki said, panting as he forced his hips to still. “Just stretching.” It was a lame excuse, but Loki was too far gone to come up with anything better. His body quaked as he tried to keep still, like his own muscles were attempting to disobey his brain. Everything in him was screaming out for more. Cum, you need to cum. Once again, Loki was forced to give in as his hips resumed their grinding. The pillow itself was now damp with how much he was leaking, and it felt amazing.

The phone was quiet, and Loki could almost hear how hard you were thinking on the other end. And then: “Loki, are you...masturbating?” Your voice trailed off as you said that word. The sheer embarrassment was evident in your tone, and Loki was almost astounded at how bold you were. Not many humans had the nerve to just up and ask something like that.

Even through the shock of being caught, Loki could not find it in him to be surprised that you had caught on. You had always come across as intelligent to him, it was foolish to think he could fool you with a half-hearted excuse. Still, it was beyond humiliating to have been called out so brazenly. Loki saw no point in denying it; you would not have asked if you weren't sure. “Yes,” he replied, voice cracking as he froze in place for the second time. Despite the embarrassment, Loki’s erection did not not falter. In fact, it seemed that he only got harder. This mortal would be the death of him.

“O-oh!” You seemed surprised, like you hadn’t expected him to come right out with it. “I’m so sorry, I guess I interrupted you, huh? Shit, I’m sorry.” How absurd. Loki was the one shamelessly rubbing himself against a pillow while talking to you, and you were the one apologizing.

Loki found it intriguing that you hadn’t hung up immediately upon learning of his actions. You hadn’t seemed disgusted at all, just apologetic for interrupting his activities. Loki wasn’t sure if your lack of repulsion was what caused it, or if it was simply his need clouding his judgement, but his mouth began to move before he could stop it. “It’s excellent for sleep. I highly recommend it for nights like these.”

There was no sugar coating it; that was a proposition, no matter how poorly disguised it was as simple advice. “Um,” came your faint reply. Loki’s face burned as he pictured the look of horror you were probably wearing at the moment. And then he nearly swallowed his tongue as you spoke again. “Yeah, I tried earlier. Wasn’t really...working.”

A new gush of blood found its way into Loki’s cock at your admission. He couldn’t help but imagine you writhing on your bed, soaked in sweat and your own slick as you tried desperately to get to that crescendo of pleasure. His blush had somehow grown even stronger, and he couldn’t recall the last time he had even blushed at all. This mortal was killing him, you were his executioner and he was begging for you to pull the trigger.

“That’s quite unfortunate,” Loki managed through his reverie. He was still frozen, almost scared to begin his motions again for fear of cumming on the spot. His cock twitched in time with his racing heart, occasionally dripping precum into his pants. Loki was a mess, but he could not bring himself to care in the slightest. All that mattered was the arousal screaming under his skin and your intoxicating voice in his ears.

“Yeah. Sorry, should I go? And let you, y’know, finish?”

Loki racked his brain for an excuse to get you to stay. It was maddening, how quickly you had ruined him. Seduction was one of his many talents, as was manipulation. In the past, he would have had no trouble at all talking someone into his bed and onto his cock, but you were different. Every flirtation died on his lips the moment he was in your presence, and it was all he could do to form complete sentences as you turned his knees to jelly.

After an excruciating period of silence as Loki thought, he finally spoke. “It would be unfair of me to abandon you in favor of pleasuring myself when you cannot do the same.”

This time it was your turn to stay quiet. Loki waited anxiously, half-expecting you to just leave anyway. He had already come to terms with your disinterest in him, you were probably just being polite. But...you had called him. There must have been at least a slight attraction for Loki to have been on your mind after attempting to get yourself off.

“Maybe we could…” There was a tremble to your voice as you trailed off, and Loki held his breath as he waited for you to finish. Whatever your suggestion ended up being, he was ready to enthusiastically agree. Anything that involved you and pleasure was incredibly enticing. “Maybe we don’t have to hang up, then.”

Loki’s eyes went wide. Did you mean…? An involuntary moan fell from his lips as he shivered at the thought. “I would, mm, not be opposed to that idea.” Loki’s body had won over for the final time that night and his hips began to move again. After restraining himself for so long, feeling that delicious friction once again nearly overwhelmed him.

“I don’t really know how to do this,” you said. “I can’t really believe I actually asked you that.”

“Would you like instruction, pet?”

“That might help, yeah.”

Loki began to wonder if he was dead, and this was his version of Valhalla. Whatever the case, he was going to ride this high for as long as he could. Everything else seemed to fade into the distance: the chirping of birds outside as the sun rose, the hum of the traffic down below, all of it meant nothing. It meant nothing because you were on the other side of the phone asking for Loki to tell you how to touch yourself. Loki took a deep breath and tried to get a hold of himself; he needed to let you catch up before he could allow himself to lose control.

“I want you to get undressed, and get comfortable.” That was a simple enough command, Loki figured. If he started slow, maybe he could reign in his pathetic neediness and focus solely on your pleasure.

“Okay, I can do that.” The speaker went quiet as you presumably settled onto your bed and slipped out of your pajamas. “Now what?”

“Touch your breasts,” Loki said. His breathing was heavy, but even as he settled into the role of your instructor. “Rub your fingers across them, tell me how it feels.”

You sighed happily. “It feels really nice. Can you tell me what you’re doing?”

Loki was a bit ashamed to admit that he was currently grinding into a pillow, but figured there was no point in lying. “I’m, uh, I have a pillow between my legs, and I’m rubbing against it.”

A whimper burst from your lips. “Oh, that’s so hot.”

“Is it?” Loki asked hesitantly. He didn’t feel very attractive; slick trousers and sweat coated skin, fighting hard to hold it together.

“Yeah, fuck. Can I touch myself, please?”

Loki wanted to drag it out a bit longer, to tease you, but he couldn’t find it in himself to say no to that pretty voice. Especially when you asked so nicely. “Go ahead, pet. You’re such a good girl.”

There was a faint slick sound, then a drawn out moan. Loki groaned in response, the sound extracting a full body shiver from the god. He had never heard such alluring sounds of pleasure, you were just so far above any other being he had ever met. “That’s it,” he murmured in encouragement.

“Feels so good,” you said, voice growing high pitched. “Shit, I’m not gonna last too long. Ah, fuck. Been needing this all night.”

Loki sucked in a breath and began to thrust with more fervor. His eyes nearly rolled back at the pressure and his thighs squeezed around the pillow. “That’s okay, darling. I, oh--” Loki cut himself off with a strangled moan as his pleasure mounted. “I need to cum, too.”

For a moment, panting and whimpered moans were the only thing coming through the speaker. Loki prayed that you were as close as he was, because the coil tightening in his stomach threatened to snap at any moment. It was all he could do to keep from allowing his release to overtake him before you got yours. “Please, pet. I want to hear you cum,” he ground out as his eyes fell shut.

“So close,” you whined. “Loki, I’m gonna cum.”

He couldn’t help it. Loki’s control disintegrated as he began rutting into the pillow like a wild animal. His hips moved in sharp, quick thrusts, and quiet moans left his lips with every movement. ‘Cum--fuck, mm--cum for me, love.” He was going to cum, he couldn’t stop. He just needed you to finish first.

The phone crackled as you let out a sharp cry of pleasure. Loki listened in a trance, trying to memorize every noise that left your lips as you climaxed. Your sounds spurred him on, and he found himself tipping over the edge, cumming harder than he had in a long time. Pleasure whited out his vision, and Loki could faintly hear himself whining your name in a broken voice. He didn’t get the chance to be embarrassed about the noise; his cock pulsed in dizzying waves of euphoria, spurting out rope after rope of hot cum. It shot into his pants, soaking them all the way through and seeping into the pillow. It wasn’t until the last drop had left his body that he was finally able to stop the groans that had been bubbling up from his throat.

As the pleasure subsided, Loki sagged against the bed and took in the mess he had made. His pants were ruined, no doubt about that. And the pillow? Well, it would most likely need a few good washes. But he felt sated, too relaxed to even care about the cum drying to his thighs.

“Are you still there?”

Fuck, he had almost forgotten that you were still on the phone. “Yes,” he croaked out. “That was…”

“Amazing,” you finished for him. Though you couldn’t see him, Loki nodded in agreement.

The bed suddenly felt very large and very empty after the daze of Loki’s orgasm faded. He found himself wishing that you were here, so he could wrap his arms around that perfect waist and bury his nose in your hair. It was an incredibly foreign feeling; Loki had never been one to cuddle after sex. But then again, everything about you was different. You were special. Loki opened his mouth, ready to invite you to his room, but something stopped him. What if this had been just a spur of the moment thing for you? What if you only saw him as a tool to get yourself off?

“Would it be weird if I came down there?” You asked, startling Loki out of his thoughts. There you went again, calming his anxieties before he even had the chance to feel them.

A relieved grin broke out on his face, and his heart sped up again in excitement. “No, I would very much enjoy that.” And for the first time in a very long time, Loki felt wanted.