#and it’s like yeah I win too by not having to interact with you

[abbiistabbii]

Hello. I live in the UK (Yeah) and thus, I have to deal with the Online Safety Act in practice and on the ground. I kinda wanna write this account for three reasons.

All the YouTube Videos about it that are clogging my recommendations page are taking a bad situation and sensationalising it for clicks, views and engagement (as YouTube Channels do, alas), which gives a bit of an over the top breathless view on it.

I kinda wanna talk about it from the point of an average person.

My own mental health.

In short, it's bad.

About me.

I'm a thirty something, with a BA in History, I like to choose what I share about myself online (Oversharing can bite you in the arse), and I consider myself to be on the Left-Libertarian quadrant of the Political Compass. I'm transgender, queer af, Scottish Independence supporting and value Open Source tech, participationary democracy, and have Bookchinite views on things. OK? Ok.

So what about the Online Safety Act 2023?

The Online Safety Act 2023 (or as I call it, the OSA) was passed under the last Conservative Administration and despite winning the 2024 election, Labour is not merely enforcing it but enforcing it with some glee it seems with the Technology Minister insisting that if you are against it, you're with the Pedophiles.

But fun fact, The United Kingdom publishes all legistlation online for all to see and it's viewable here. The bill doesn't just cover sites about Porn, Violence or Eating disorders, it covers all sites with User Generated Content or where users interact with each other. It also covers search engines and sites with a search function (yikes). But the issue lies, like all bills, not with what it defines, but what it leaves vague. Section 60, Subsection 2 defines "Content that is harmful to children" as:

Primary priority content that is harmful to children (Porn, suicide, self harm, Eating Disorders).

Priority content that is harmful to children (abusive content or harm toward people and/or animals, be it real or fictional, yes you heard).

Content, not within 1 or 2, of a kind which presents a material risk of significant harm to an appreciable number of children in the United Kingdom.

That last one, Ladies, Gents, and all those inbetween and neither is what is worrying because that could mean literally anything. In fact no, that does mean anything. All you need to do is say "this harms children" and boom, age blocked. I could, hypothetically, point to the Prime Minister and Wes Streeting for harm to children, considering the amount of transphobia they spew could come under this law, because you know, there are an appreciable number of under 18s who are Trans, but we'll circle back to that.

So what does shit look like on the ground.

The Online Safety Act had an effect before it even came into force, with websites asking users to make an app and verify their ages before the 25th. But even outside of the usual suspects (porn) it was having an effect.

British Based Forums started shutting down, simply because they could not comply with what the Online Safety Act demanded or did not want to. These forums include football supporter forums, Renault EV owner forums, forums for single and divorcing dads, a forum for fix gear bicycle users in London (yes, you heard), and even a Mastodon Instance

They didn't shut down because they were pornographic or had pornographic content, they shut down because they were places where users interacted with each other and they were too small and did not have the resources to institue age checks. Sites from outside the UK started Geoblocking UK users (we'll get back to this later) because again, they didn't have the resources to institute agechecks. These included some porn sites, but also a lot of forums, blogs, and lemmy instances.

OK, so what about the age checks.

So pretty much every major social media and porn site (but not all) are instituting age checks. These take the form of an Age Estimation Face Scan (which have been broken by using video games like The Sims, Death Stranding and Garry's Mod, yes, you heard that right), or a Drivers Licence or Passport check, which you were told before this bullshit happened not to do. As a result, a lot of scammers are setting up face ID checkpoints and taking people's drivers licences and passports. For a while, you could go onto Google Images and get pictures of people's driver's licences.

And it gets worse because even the "legit" age checkers like Yoti say that they will delete the data, just not for a couple of weeks, just incase the cops want your ID (yikes). This of course, opens up a whole can of worms because this means that if Yoti gets hacked (which I'm sure every blackhat is doing as we speak), we will not merely have people's ID and faces leaked, but potentially what porn you have been viewing, which would be lovely for Blackmail.

The effect on Social Media

The social media sites that are doing verification include (but are not limited to)

Twitter/X

Bluesky

Reddit

Discord

Facebook (and it's subsiduaries).

OK but here's where it gets worrying. There's two people who decide what's covered under this act:

The Government

The Social Media Companies themselves

This has lead to a couple of things happening:

A lot of overreach: Reddit, for example, are covering their arse by not merely Age Gating NSFW subreddits, but also SFW subreddits, namely help forums for people going through mental health issues, forums to stop smoking, and safe for work LGBT subreddits. Despite news content explicitly getting exceptions, Twitter/X are Age Gating posts by News Outlets. The example brought up frequently are Protests outside of Hotels housing Asylum Seekers, but this is currently also used on Protests against the Palestinian Genocide, Environmental Protests, and posts about anything related to those things. Basically the law is so vague on what counts as "harmful to children" that anything the Government doesn't like can be banned. If you're one of these people who are like "they're not going to target the other side" or "they're only targetting my side", let me remind you; Palestinian Action has been proscribed as a Terror Group for an act of Direct action and you can be arrested for even suggesting support for them.

A lot of twitchy fingers: Now bare in mind here, because of the vaguries in the law, we don't really know if something can or will be covered. For example, on my Fediverse account, I wrote about how Tuberculosis gave us Leather Daddies. That mentioned Erotic Artist Tom of Finland (who, despite making smut, has had an outsized effect on culture). Could that be age gated under this law? Since the law says "anything that could cause harm to an appreciable amount of children", that could mean anything. Technically, Tom and Jerry could be banned.

It doesn't just affect smut or politics.

Remember when I said Reddit is age gating LGBT subs? Well the current government is very much not Trans friendly. Keir Starmer made transphobic jibes in front of the father of Brianna Ghey, a murdered transgender teenager, in Parliament. Wes Streeting is a transphobe who's linked to various "gender critical" groups and is enforcing anti-trans policies. What happens when SFW help forums are age gated, or charities like LGBT Youth Scotland? A transgender teen, racked with dyphoria, may have nowhere reliable to go if the forum they require help from or the site that has the info they need is age gated. It is no accident that LGBT media is usually marked as being Adults Only when things turn south, even if the media in question is completely Safe For Work.

And what of other minorities? Will their spaces online be gated when opinions on them turn south?

And the whole thing Backfires.

The one thing about Teenagers and technology is that they are clever and when they find a work around, they use it and they share that work around with everyone. The governent, which is run by people who are a little older than Teenagers, don't seem to understand this and think that teens are as tech illiterate, or even more so, than they are.

Guess what all the teens did: They got VPNs. being teenagers with very little money (you can imagine the kind of stress they are under), are now using dodgy "free" VPNs who make their money by selling the data off to who the fuck knows, including things like your passwords and accounts, which puts teens into even more danger than they were before. Some of the cleverer ones are using Tor, which, while great, also runs the risk of running into straight up illegal material, putting kids into even more danger.

Now, I'm sure some poor sod at the Civil Service had to sit down with the tech minister or even the Prime Minister and explain how the bill was a bad fucking idea, and by the looks of things, the response from Number 10 was "I don't care". If you are reading this, nameless civil servant, you have my greatest sympathy because you must've needed the patience of a Saint or Bodhisatva to deal with the urge not to end up on the front pages the morning after.

What has been the government line to VPNs? Well they have said that "it's illegal to circumvent age checks with VPNs", but a law is only as good as it's enforcement. The other line is "Websites cannot tell people about VPNs in regards to age checks", but every fucking money making youtube channel for several years has been running ads for various VPNs for years now. Everyone knows what a VPN is, except number 10. And finally, it's been floated that VPNs themselves should be made illegal. All of this ignores the fact that companies, banks, and even the government require VPNs to do shit securely. My bank uses VPN tech for fuck sake! I don't think the government will care about practicality, they clearly haven't here. But then again, both the Last Labour GOvernment and the last Conservative governments, have floated the idea of banning or breaking encryption, only to (hopefully) be disuaded when told it would destroy the economy.

Oh. And it gets worse.

The Wikimedia Foundation (the people in charge of Wikipedia) are currently in court with OfCom trying to stop them putting Wikipedia under Category 1 regulations. Under which, all editors will have to reveal their identity, potentially putting them at risk of attack from unfriendly governments. Worse case Scenario: Wikipedia gets Geoblocked.

Wikipedia is one of those sites that I love and is a testament to the human capacity for knowledge and sharing. It is the modern Library of Alexandria, a real life Hitchiker's guide. To restrict or lose it would be the final straw for civil society and freedom of knowledge. If you are restricting Wikipedia, you are not a good person.

In short

Shits bad. Fireballs and lighting aren't raining from the sky, but shit is bad. I'm so, so fucking tired.

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

tbh i think that even unwinnable fights should be winnable. some of the BEST fights i've ever run as a dm were ones i built kill the players (in a fun way. I had some cutscenes prepped so even the loss would be a different flavour of win)- but then they were clever bastards and managed to either win the fights or pull themselves out of trouble. I think it's perfectly fine to plan for a fight that players aren't supposed to win, but you need to let them. if they can't win, they can't lose, and the meaning of that encounter is diminished. do that too many times, and they stop trusting you to give them roleplay prompts and start expecting to sit there waiting while you drive the story for them.

but if they can win... if there is always the chance to win, no matter how impossible the odds, then they ALWAYS have hope. they always get invested. they feel the big emotions of success or the big emotions of failure, and you fucking Win as a dm/roleplay prompter/lead bastard.

[thepandalion]

was anyone gonna inform me that jax checks all the gender boxes or was I supposed to just watch the first episode of the amazing digital circus and learn that the hard way

[unproduciblesmackdown]

The Billions Showrunners Go To See Bway Bmc like lgw "the problem has always been me" and they look at each other approvingly and nod like now he's getting it :) and then the squip's deactivated and everyone's embracing the realities of being a person and rejecting the idea there can be, should be, and is a set of standards to meet to get everything you want and preclude yourself from being mistreated and they're like nooo what a powerful tragedy :(

[sonknuxadow]

sorry for pushing so hard for people to vote for sonic to win this months sonic channel poll but i DID say like a month ago that if there was ever an option for sonic and knuckles to be in art together i would campaign for that like my life depended on it. so. its not like i didnt warn you. you shouuld vote for sonic Btw

[un-local]

very interesting how all the lonesome aesthetic yearning girlbloggers are like. the most allergic to any kind of interaction…

[cuteniarose]

A not-yet-explored but objectively hilarious aspect of Ehuang's existence is that now the Beifongs and the Red Lotus share a grandchild and you just KNOW family dinners were An Ordeal every single fucking time

[ujunxverse]

been in tumblr for too long that i forgot how to promo my fics on ao3 or interact w other ao3 writers ;AKLJDFJ;A

[stargirlygirl]

some middle-aged creep whistles at you

lads li's (no raf; separate) x fem!reader

a self-indulgent drabble with hopefully a teaspoon of originality

⭑.ᐟ caleb

you just got your hair done and were ecstatic about showing caleb. in fact, you were on your way to his apartment when you stop in at the grocery store to pick up some snacks.

parking your car, you step out and start walking up to the building. this fuck ass forty-something year old is striding toward you, bags in his hands and tattoos snaking up his arms. he makes eye contact with you and does the only reasonable thing some jackass would do.

he winks and clicks his tongue you.

the interaction lasts no more than a few seconds. but once you make it into the shop, you swear you're about hurl your guts up. you can barely conceal the disgust on your face as you grab a basket and beeline for the snacks aisle.

what the...?! like, you know you're hot. okay, well, you know you're not too bad to look at. but what-what on earth possesses someone to do something like that? especially when you're like half his age?

your stomach feels hollow, this sick feeling swirling and taking hold of your senses.

the aisle is like colour overload. all of these chip packets and chockies compete for your attention, puffing out their chests and giving it their all to win a trip into your shopping basket. bright lights bounce off the packaging, straight into your eyes. you're blinded by their need for attention; your appetite is gone.

sighing, you trudge to the self-help checkouts and stow your basket before exiting the grocery store.

the drive to caleb's elapses in seconds. you're so out of it, you blink in shock as you gaze around you; your car is silent and waiting to be abandoned.

taking the elevator up, you don't even have to knock as the colonel is swinging open his door the second you step in front of it. his phone is in his hand, and those violet eyes are trained on you. they roam over you, assessing for any damages.

and while there's none physically, he notices the slump in your shoulders and dimming of your spirits.

he exhales, "had me so worried, pips. d'you need help with the groceries or—?"

"no," you mumble, shaking your head. your perfect curls bounce as you shuffle inside. no words are necessary as you wrap your arms around caleb's meaty torso and bury your face in his cream jumper.

you can't even be mad about him tracking your location, you're so mentally exhausted.

your husband holds you tightly, squeezing you reassuringly before settling back into a firm embrace. he walks you backwards to the couch and pulls you down with him. those plump lips press a sweet kiss on top of your head, and he takes a whiff of your hair. as beautiful as it looks, he prefers the scent of your shampoo.

"i like your hair, pretty," he murmurs.

"yeah," you say, the sound muffled by his top.

"wanna tell me what happened, honey?" he coos while rubbing your back soothingly. you don't respond for a little while, trying to figure out the best way to break the news.

finally, you explain quietly, "so, i was going to the grocery store, right?"

"mhmm," he hums, fingers threading through your shiny locks.

"and i was walking, right?" caleb hums again, his fingernails lightly scratching your scalp.

"and this man—"

"man?!" he interrupts, his arms automatically locking around you and pushing you flush against his toned body.

your husband asks, "what man? what did he do to you, pipsqueak?"

"nothing! nothing, well..." you trail off, the words getting stuck in your throat. tension stiffens caleb's body, putting you on edge. it's like he can sense your apprehension.

slowly, he softens and resumes playing with your hair.

he insists, "you can tell me, pips. let me be here for you." you nuzzle his pec with your nose, his warmth making you snuggle into him.

you admit, "he, like, winked at me, and clicked his tongue at me. and it was so gross, baby. i couldn't even buy any snacks." with your mood-ruiner aired, a weight falls from your chest. your husband carries the burden now, taking all of it so you don't have to hurt anymore.

if only things were so simple.

"please don't... do anything, caleb." you lift your head from his chest, your fists bunching up the fabric of his jumper. your eyes search his, and find that familiar coldness of the colonel.

"caleb—"

"no one gets to treat my partner like that n' get away with it," he mutters, a vein popping in his tense jaw. you cup his cheeks and shake your head.

"please—"

"pips—" he starts.

your voice becomes smaller toward the end as you plead, "please, just... just stay with me." caleb sighs as his long fingers find your nape. guiding you forward, your foreheads rest against each other; an unspoken agreement.

your husband steadies you through the waves of your emotions, remaining ever-present as you process and come to terms with what's happened. so much worse has happened to other women, you know that. this is nothing compared to the tyranny men can unleash when they choose to.

nonetheless, caleb bears witness to your pain. he reminds you that no matter how small or insignificant this hiccup might seem, if it hurts you, then he'll be here to support you.

"i'll do better to protect you next time, pipsqueak. i promise." he seals his oath with a loving kiss to your forehead and a squeeze of your body.

little do you know who he's paying a visit to the next day. and caleb doesn't intend for you to find out.

⭑.ᐟ zayne

when you get home, your apartment is empty as per usual at 6pm. and it remains only filled by you and dinner's aroma until 8pm when zayne gets home.

he could feel it as soon as he stepped inside and shed his coat. this chill in the air; one not of his own doing. maybe his mind was playing tricks on him. he has had a long day after all.

zayne exchanges his dress shoes for slippers and rolls up his sleeves, revealing those drool-worthy, veiny forearms. after washing his hands, he sneaks up behind you and grasps your waist. you flinch, jumping from the sudden spook and staring at him like he's a predator.

"oh," you mumble, clutching your wildly beating heart.

shaking your head, you apologise, "sorry. sorry, zayne, baby. i was just, uh, thinking."

"i see," he says quietly, those shrewd hazels sweeping over you.

"did something happen?" he asks, observing how wide your eyes are despite the slight distance between you.

his voice is underscored by concern as he entertains the thought, "did i do something wrong?"

"no! no, baby, you didn't. i just..." glimpsing down at the bubbling pasta sauce, you busy yourself with stirring it.

you change the topic with, "how was work? busy?" your husband remains quiet as he does another once-over. you seem to be okay. but he knows you're not. you never flinch around him like that unless something has got you on edge. he knows it. and you wish he would dang forget it.

"fine," he delivers clinically, moving to set the table before washing the dishes. you eat your spaghetti in thick silence. it's gnawing at you from the inside out, the minor incident that happened earlier today when you were purchasing tonight's ingredients.

"how long do you intend to pick at your meatballs for, my love?" zayne sighs. your fork clanks against your plate as you drop it, again stunned by his sudden interruption.

you laugh awkwardly, reflexively scratching your neck even though it's not itchy just to busy yourself.

"what do you mean, babe? i'm not picking at my meatballs," you defend yourself, huffing at the end there.

"and i like carrots," he counters.

"oh, you! fine, okay? fine. i was at the supermarket when this middle age loser whistled at me, and it's been bugging me all day. happy now?" you blurt out. zayne's brow pinches, and from the sudden tension in his shoulders, you can tell he's anything but happy.

"a middle aged loser whistled at you?" he clarifies.

"yes! it was just so... ugh! i feel so gross thinking about it, to be honest," you admit.

placing his cutlery down, your husband gives you his undivided attention. it's overwhelming, his intense gaze and the thoughts spiralling in your mind, the memory on replay. you stare at the table cloth like it has something interesting to add to your conversation.

"dear, please look at me," he murmurs. exhaling, you glance up and meet his eyes.

zayne's tone is soft as he reminds you, "you shouldn't keep these kinds of matters to yourself, remember?"

"i know, i just... didn't wanna bother you," you mumble. your husband shakes his head slightly.

"you never bother me, dear," he reassures you. you hum quietly, words feeling heavy on your tongue and stuck between your teeth.

he continues, "i'm sorry this happened to you. i can only imagine how upset you must feel." you nod, a pout on your lips. right now, all you want is to be in your husband's arms.

you sniffle, "after dinner, can we cuddle?" zayne nods and resumes eating his delicious meal. those sleep-deprived eyes watch you closely as you take small bites of your meatballs, wrestling with the lump in your throat to swallow.

later that night, your husband holds you tight and reassures you that he'll do whatever he can to prevent something like this from happening again.

⭑.ᐟ xavier

"xav," you call tentatively while poking his cheek. he's been out like a light since you came home a few hours ago, and the disgust has finally eaten away at your resolve.

"xaaa-aaav," you coo, your pitch shifting higher with the later part of his nickname. still, nothing. this man could sleep through a war, you swear.

"xavier!" you exclaim, rocking his body from side to side. he groans, his eyelids fluttering open and brilliant eyes settling on you.

he blinks sleepily and yawns, "what is it?" you shake your head and crawl into bed with him. your body melts into his, the warmth making you all gooey inside. your partner's lean arm wraps around your shoulders and pulls you in, nice n' snug.

"is this what you woke me up for? a cuddle," he asks softly, but you can hear the grin pulling at his lips.

"no," you mumble into his cosy long-sleeve. one of his hands cup your shoulder while his other rests on your low back.

he prompts, "then what did you wake me for?"

"can't a girl just wake her husband up?!" you snap. you didn't mean to. you really didn't. but it just came out.

xavier's quiet, his gaze curious as he takes in how tightly you're clutching his shirt. The hand on your back moves to cover your fist. he eases your clinging fingers off the crumpled fabric and holds your hand.

"everything, okay?" he murmurs, swiping his thumb over the back of your hand at a relaxing pace.

"no," you pout, curling into his body even more.

"did i snore?" he asks, his voice tinged with concern. you push off his chest and stare at him dead in the eye.

"no, xav. you didn't snore," you spit out.

"your period then? but i thought it was due next week." he says that last part to himself.

you groan, "no! god, xav, just—argh!" you start getting up, but he instantly pulls you back down. your body collides with his as those strong arms loop around you and hold on tight.

"what did i do?" his voice is gentle but worried.

you sigh, "nothing. 'm sorry. i didn't mean to get mad at you. just don't feel good right now." his fingertips dance along your spine, leaving pools of heat at every spot he encounters. vertebrae by vertebrae, you soften in his embrace.

at last, you say what's been on your mind, "i feel... violated almost. like, unsafe, repulsed. this guy like winked at me and made this noise, like, you know with your teeth? and it was just really off-putting like. if you wanna say i'm pretty then just say i'm pretty, don't embarrass me like that. and he was so fucking old. like he wasn't that old, but i swear he was doing drugs in his youth cause he looked rough."

xavier's silent for a heartbeat before muttering, "when did this happen?"

"earlier today when i was out. i was getting my hair done, remember?"

"yes, i remember," he affirms. his hold on you tightens a fraction, and you sigh as he kisses the top of your head.

"if i had been there, my dear, i can assure you, things would have played out differently," he states, an edge to his usually sweet voice.

tension coils and dissipates as he compliments you gently, "and your hair looks nice."

"thanks, glow worm," you exhale, kissing his heart through his sleep shirt.

for who knows how long, you two stay like that. pressed up against each other, xavier cooing reassurances laced with violence, and you giggling and rubbing your cheek against his chest.

⭑.ᐟ sylus

those crimson eyes are on you the second you stalk into his training room. ruby gloves coat fearsome fists that punch at the poor punching bag dangling from the ceiling. sweat beads down the crime boss's forehead and sumptuous arms.

he smirks, "miss me, kitten?" you nod, a dampness to your typically bright features. your husband straightens up and waltzes over to you.

"thanks, sweetie," he murmurs while taking the gym towel from your outstretched hands. wiping up his sweat and draping the towel behind his neck, he raises a silver brow at you.

"something the matter?" he asks, light and cocky as usual. you shake your head 'no' while shifting closer and hugging him.

he chuckles, "oh, you sure, kitten?"

"shut up," you mutter, earning you another rich laugh. sylus returns your embrace, his hands gently stroking your back and soft strands.

"i see you've made some changes. how refreshing," he remarks.

you grumble, "don't be a dick to me right now, sy. i'm not in the mood." leaning down, your husband presses a long kiss to the top of your head.

he mumbles into your hair, "my apologies, darling." but to you, it still doesn't read as genuine.

"do you know the definition of sincerity, sylus? for someone so charismatic, i didn't think you'd have the emotional capacity of a laptop charger. my teddy bear could do a better job than you."

instant regret washes over you as those words fall from your lips. you pull back, chin tilted up as you gaze into his eyes. he's unfazed, smirking even more haughtily now.

you apologise anyway, "i'm sorry! i didn't mean that! i just... something bad happened and now i feel awful because of it."

"mhmm, go on, sweetie," he encourages you.

drawing closer, his voice drops slightly lower as he says, "it must be something significant if you're comparing your husband to a laptop charger."

you're torn between telling him where he can stick it, and babbling about what just happened after your trip to the salon. you choose the latter (unfortunately).

"this old creep whistled at me. like he checked me out and whistled at me! can you believe it?! i-i need to take a shower i feel so defiled and angry and grossed out." sylus is quiet for a few seconds, undeniably processing your words and selecting the best course of action.

"wasn't mephisto with you, kitten?" he asks.

you shrug, "i don't know. maybe he needed to go potty or something."

sylus sighs, "i know you're a comedian at heart, but now is not the time for your jokes, dearest."

he continues with, "did anything else happen? did he approach you?"

"no! not at all, baby. he just really freaked me out," you insist. your husband hums, the sound gravelly. he makes a mental note to reconvene with his crow after comforting you.

if mephisto witnessed this unsettling encounter, sylus could have a word with the man who's sent his kitten running into his arms.

and if mephisto wasn't there... well, not like it mattered. onychinus's leader has many ways of finding people. and that "old creep" better prepare himself for what's coming when sylus gets his hands on—

"sy," you coo. he gazes down at you, his sweet wife, looking up at him with those big eyes and pouty lips.

your husband sighs, "don't worry, kitten. that won't happen again." you nod, understanding his deeper meaning. despite your protests, you know he'll do what he sees fit. so you keep your mouth shut and relax into his heat and sweat instead.

me trying to not swear during this drabble^

haha so this happened to me today and this is me processing what happened😁 i had such a nice afternoon planned for myself. my caleb wip was going to receive SO MUCH love and attention, but then inspiration just had to strike.

for raf, i think he would suggest running you a bubble bath and soaking in the tub together to comfort you. i also think he'd be raising the tides and unleashing hell upon mankind for what's just happened to you. or maybe both.

[m00ntunaart]

2nd STARWARS/DAEMON AU POST!!!!! This time with the CC's and the Disaster Lineage!

Obi-Wan: Maned Wolf (Kee-Ayt)

Anakin: Lion (maned female lioness) (Asieko)

Ahsoka: Gryfalcon (Tuex)

Cody: German Shepherd (Beskar)

Rex: Siberian Husky (Queen)

Wolffe: Wolfdog (Whitefang)

Fox: Doberman Pinscher (Vulpe)

Bly: American Akita (Lyra)

LORE TIME: first off! Jedi! So I thought a lot about how daemons and Jedi should work. I did end up deciding that Jedi GENERALLY have bird daemons (like the witches in His Dark Material), BUT not always. The Jedi having bird daemons is not a ‘All Force Sensitives Have Daemons Who Settle As Birds’ thing. It wouldn’t make sense in this AU since Force-sensitivity is a spectrum and at what level would someone have ‘enough’ force-sensitivity to have a daemon for certain become a bird? I didn’t like that narrative as much, it felt restrictive. So instead Jedi tend to have bird daemons, but not Force-Sensitives. Like all Jedi are force sensitive ( and have bird daemons) but not all Force-Sensitives are Jedi, make sense? This is because of how the Jedi raise children and teach them to interact with the force. Because of how Jedi are taught to view and use the force, their daemons tend to settle as birds! It’s ‘nurture’ over ‘nature’ thing. Which is why (in this AU at least) the Jedi don’t take in older children to train. Because they’ve already probably learned their own way to interact with the force (different from the Jedi teachings) and therefore will have a non-bird daemon! Hence Anakin having a lion daemon. “But what about Obi-Wan?” (Well since Obi-Wan is one of my favorites I get to spice him up lol). He was originally very Jedi like (daemon wise) but after the whole Jedi Apprentice/Xanantos enslaving him/Melida-Daan war thing, he daemon ended up settling as a Maned Wolf! I imagine he was just about the age where his daemon would settle (usually 13-15, which is the same reason this is the age Jedi initiates are made padawans), so it was a surprise that his daemon so abruptly changed and settled. Most likely the effects of being so abruptly exposed to violence and war right out of being only use to the peace of the Jedi temple his whole life. 

(Extra) The 3rd page of the post! Cody and Obi-Wan’s daemons! Beskar and Kee-Ayt! Even though in my doodles Beskar seems to be very grumpy and even hatful towards Kee-Ayt, DO NOT BE FOOLED. Beskar adores Kee-Ayt. Their relationship just mirrors how I headcanon Cody’s and Obi-Wan’s. Where they will harass and bitch at each other to hell and back. Sounding from the outsider’s POV like two people who hate each other. When in reality these two are joined at the hip and love each other. They just will never admit it because “we have reputations to uphold!’ (Anakin says “what reputation? the reputation that one of you would murder the other if it wasn’t for the fact the GAR would court marshal the other?”) But yeah, Beskar makes fun of Kee-Ayt’s long ass legs. The mini ‘comic’ is about how I imagine that since all the Clones’ daemons are dogs/canines, when they win a battles they have a ‘Victory Call’ where they all howl. Beskar offers for Kee-Ayt to join in, but Maned Wolves can’t howl. They do this thing called a Roar-Bark (look up a video it’s so loud). This is the first time Beskar hears Kee-Ayt roar-bark and it scared the shit out of her.

(Extra Extra) The 4th page of the post! This is mostly doodles of Rex, Anakin and Ashoka’s daemons (Queen, Asieko and Tuex). All three reflect the close relationship that Rex, Anakin and Ahsoka have. Hence Tuex nesting on Queen and Asieko trying to groom Queen (who doesn’t appreciate the rough lion tongue bath she’s getting). (In fact Asieko tries to groom Tuex and Kee-Ayt too, but Tuex is too small and Kee-Ayt just starts biting Asieko bcs she doesn’t appreciate the bath either lol). We also have Tuex dive bombing Asieko (a common occurrence whenever Anakin and Ahsoka bicker). Tuex also does this to literally anyone who slightly annoys him or Ahsoka. And lastly the little doodle of Rex and Queen screaming! Idk if you’ve ever seen videos of Huskies, but oh boy are they loud and dramatic. I think with all the stress and insanity Rex has to deal with leading the 501st, he and Queen often have therapy screaming sessions. They deserve to. 

(ALSO, I will be making follow up reblogs with lore/plot stuff for each individual character)

[luna-azzurra]

Why Your Protagonist Shouldn’t Be the Only One With a Brain Cell

Your side characters are not scenery. they’re not just there to hold the protagonist’s emotional purse while they go through their Heroic Arc. if your MC is the sun, cool. but the story still needs stars. and planets. and like, a moon or two. or else we’re just staring at one bright dude in an empty void. which gets old. fast.

→ So, they should want stuff. and not just “help the main character win the thing.” maybe they want revenge. or validation. or to finally pass their damn exams. maybe they don’t want to be part of the story. that’s interesting too! the point is: they’ve got lives. your protagonist is not the center of their universe (even if they’re in love with them).

→ disagree. please and fight a little. healthy conflict between characters = chef’s kiss. let your side characters call the MC out when they’re being an idiot. let them have their own opinions and morals and trauma. not everything needs to be “yes boss, I’m with you to the end”...some of the best dynamics come from people who love each other but can’t agree on what the right thing even is.

→ disappear sometimes. You don’t need to cram every side character into every chapter. people go home. they get busy. they have their own stuff going on. let them drift in and out naturally. it’s more realistic and it gives you room to breathe between interactions. absence makes the heart grow fonder, or whatever.

→ surprise the reader. I Mean, do you ever get to that one scene where a side character does something way out of pocket and you’re like “EXCUSE ME??” yeah, I love it. it’s not out of nowhere if you’ve built them properly. people are full of contradictions. give your side characters layers and weirdness and secrets and soft spots. make them unpredictable in the way that real people are.

→ Steal the spotlight (just a little) and let them have their moment. their own little arcs. let the reader fall for them. there’s no law that says only the MC can be interesting. in fact, your story will be better if the supporting cast occasionally steals the show. think of it like ensemble energy, your MC’s glow-up hits harder when the people around them are shining too.

[lyrefromthesea]

Male pillars x Reader - sitting on their lap

author's note: I'm strictly against any kind of sexual interactions with minors. That's why I will either exclude Muichiro from such fics of or portray a wholesome interaction instead.

pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Muichiro x reader, Gyomei x reader

content warning: suggestive words and actions

Tengen:

"excuse me? I'm married!" he dramatically exclaimed, looking down at you. the man was already trying to refrain from smiling, watching you turn your head towards him.

"i'm sure Hinatsuru, Makio and Suma will forgive me." you answered, showing him your hand. he smirked at the all too familiar ring. he was glad he had married you.

"just playin', i could never disappoint the flamboyant person i married!" he laughed, clearly proud of himself. when you cocked your eyebrow at him, he let out a dramatic gasp, pulling you closer.

"are you trying to say i'm not the most perfect husband you could imagine?" he asked, displaying a huge amount of shock. you knew he was just making fun, especially when he pressed your back against his chest, bringing his lips to your ear.

"you were saying entirely different things yesterday." he said, watching you shudder at his words. you slapped his knee, scolding him for saying such things outside.

"come on, you know you love it!"

Obanai:

he freezes, his brain nearly malfunctioning. it's not like you've never sat on his lap before, but you usually gave him a warning first - asked for his approval.

"[name]? what's-" he asked, surprised when your arms wrapped around his neck, barely giving Kaburamaru time to slither away. words got stuck in his throat, feeling your lips against his mask - right above his own.

"nothing. i was just feeling affectionate." you answered, shifting to wrap your arms around his torso. he looked down at you, letting out a quiet yelp when your hips moved a bit too much on his lap.

"oh..?" you looked at him, a smile slowly forming on your lips. a blush made his way towards his cheeks, luckily covered by his mask. at least he felt lucky, you would've liked to see him blush.

"it looks like you're feeling affectionate too, Obanai." you chuckled, purposely drawing light circles with your hips. of course you had noticed the growing bulge in his pants, his hands now holding yours.

"don't tease me, [name].."

Rengoku:

"little flame! how was your day?" he enthusiastically asked, his arms wrapping around your torso. he pulled you closer, placing his chin on your shoulder.

"it was okay, i missed you." you answered, leaning against his chest. he smiled at you, enjoying the way your bodies were pressed together so gently.

"we can't have that, little flame! how about we go eat later?" he asked, holding you a bit closer. you chuckled at his words, he really loved taking you to new places - especially restaurants.

"i'd like that. let's go eat something later."

Sanemi:

"and what the hell are you doing?" Sanemi asked, feeling you make yourself comfortable on his lap.

he had cleaned his sword moments prior, hearing the door open - it was you. you moved towards him without warning, getting between him and his sword.

"getting your attention." you answered, moving even closer. don't think he didn't notice the way you purposely squished your chest against his own.

"yeah? didn't I give ya enough attention, sweetheart?" he teased, watching you pout in response. you had been alone for far too long, you finally wanted to spend time with him.

"you've been working on your sword for two hours now.." you complained. he placed it down, knowing that you were right. he just felt like the proper care could safe his ass one day, though a shiny sword probably wasn't that important.

"fine, ya win. this was getting uncomfortable anyways." he answered, almost making you question what he meant until he pressed his hips against yours more. oh, now you could feel it too.

"does that mean you want my attention as well-" you asked playfully, getting cut off by his lips pressing against yours before you could finished talking.

Giyuu:

"is everything alright?" his voice broke the silence, you've been sitting on his lap for almost 5 minutes now, not saying a single word. he was confused, not sure if you were fine or needed help.

"Giyuu, attention?" you asked, feeling him relax under you. he had been tense, thinking you could've been hurt somewhere. your words instantly calmed him down, his lips pressing against yours gently.

he didn't expect you to turn his soft kiss into something more passionate. his hands slowly came to hold your hips, tongues swishing against each other.

you broke the kiss, panting against his lips. he pressed his forehead against yours, pulling you a bit closer, only to have your hips start grinding slightly.

"l- love.. t- that's not.." he muttered, his cheeks visibly growing more red. hands squeezing your hips more, trying to create more friction. he could only moan when you finally started grinding against him properly.

"i.. i need to go on a mission later.." he panted against your lips, but he didn't object when you kissed him again, your hand wandering to his belt.

Muichiro:

"Muichiro! i finally caught up to you.." you heaved, letting yourself fall onto his lap. you had been running for nearly twenty minutes now, watching the boy leave his estate without food. being the good friend you were, you ran after him.

"[name]? what are you doing here..?" he asked, letting you lean against him. your cheeks were flushed from running. it would've been different if you also were a hashira, but you still had much to learn.

"you.. you forget your food, Mui.." you panted, reaching into your pocket. he looked rather surprised when he saw the small box of food he usually brought with him.

"thank you..! i've completely forgotten." he laughed, eventually coaxing a smile out of you. you gave him the box, seeing his eyes lit up at the promise of food.

he wanted to dive right in before he had a quiet growl come from your stomach, making your cheeks flush. "do you want some?" he asked, watching you shake your head.

"i brought my own!" you countered, grabbing into your back once more. silence filled the room when you noticed you had only brought his food.

his arm wrapped around your torso, forcing you to stay on his lap a while longer. "let's share." he said, offering you some of his food. you knew he wouldn't let you go until you have had a healthy portion.

Gyomei:

"welcome back." the giant said, feeling you plop onto his lap, nuzzling against his chest. you let out a tired hum, feeling a large hand soothingly rub over your arm.

"is there something wrong? you're more quiet than usual." he asked, gently bringing your head closer with his hand - allowing you to be closer to him. you could hear the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat.

your day had been stressful, but he somehow always managed to calm you down. his warmth. his voice. his actions. they put your mind at ease.

"i know it's ridiculous, but i've felt really stressed out lately. i just want a break.." you muttered, closing your eyes. you were trying to focus on his heartbeat and ignore everything else around you.

"it's not ridiculous, you deserve a break. perhaps a visit to the hot spring would help calm you down?" he offered, feeling you nod against his chest. you felt warm hands rub over your thighs, his head now closer to yours.

"and i could pamper you a bit more after that.." he muttered against your ear, your eyes opening again. the warmth pooling in your gut could probably rival the hot spring's temperature

[yuujispinkhair]

Boxer!Sukuna Part 2 - Becoming a Dad

I got this lovely ask about how Boxer!Sukuna would react if Reader got pregnant, and I wanted to write a little something for it. Thank you so much for sending me that.

You can read Part 1 of my Boxer!Sukuna headcanons here

Pairing: Boxer!Sukuna x Reader (female) Genre: fluff Word Count: 1.8k Warnings: 18+, fluff + mentions of smut. Pregnancy, mentions of boxing injuries, modern AU. Sukuna + Reader are engaged. You can read Part 1 for more general headcanons about Boxer!Sukuna, and his and Reader's relationship. But you don't need Part 1 to understand Part 2. Minors don't interact. Divider @/benkeibear

++ Boxer!Sukuna feels as if one of his opponents punched him in the guts when you place the positive pregnancy test in his lap and look at him with big, worried eyes. He catches himself quickly, though, when he sees how anxious you are, and pulls you on his lap, and wraps you in his strong arms. One large hand cups your head and cradles it against Sukuna's broad chest. "Hey, princess. It's ok. You hear me, sweetheart? Everything is fine."

++ Boxer!Sukuna sure as hell won't let you be scared. He is man enough to comfort you when you need it, even though he is probably just as nervous as you are. If you listen closely, you can hear how fast his heart is beating, but Sukuna makes sure to distract you from that by pressing his lips against your temple and murmuring reassurance to you, followed by little kisses.

++ Boxer!Sukuna never thought he would have kids. But he also never thought he would find love. But you changed him. You taught him love. So he thinks that you can also teach him how to be a dad. And the thought of having a baby with you fills him with such warmth and pride that he just knows he wants this and will make it work.

++ Boxer!Sukuna's low voice is as sure and confident as ever when he tells you, "Take your time to decide what you want. I will be with you on every path you choose. I love you. I'm your man, always. I couldn't imagine having a screaming little brat with anyone else. But with you? Yeah, absolutely. And if you make me a daddy, then I will make damn sure to be a good one. I want to have that baby with you."

++ Boxer!Sukuna can't help but smile when you press your face into his defined pecs and tell him that you are scared but that you want to have a baby with him, too.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is already your fiancé anyway, but if he hadn't already asked you to marry him, he would have done so right now after finding out you carry his baby under your heart.

++ Boxer!Sukuna places a large hand on your belly, his long fingers sprawling gently over it. It's astounding that a strong, rough man like him can touch someone this tenderly. It surprises him, too, and he laughs softly, already knowing he will be such a menace during your pregnancy. Super protective and always taking the best care of his soon-to-be wife and mommy of his little brat.

++ Boxer!Sukuna catches himself being more careful in the ring as your pregnancy progresses. He used to let his opponents land a few hard punches to rile him up and give the crowd a good show. But now he doesn't want to risk an injury. He is going to be a dad soon. He will have such a big responsibility. He cannot afford to get injured and land himself in the hospital for several weeks, or worse, have a lifelong injury that keeps him from being the husband and father he wants to be.

++ Boxer!Sukuna changes his tactic, dropping the playful show and instead ending his fights earlier with merciless, hard punches, which are aimed precisely. The fans are still cheering like crazy and happy about the show he gives them when Sukuna wins every fight with a knockout.

++ Boxer!Sukuna feels even more motivated now that you are having his baby. He wants to win the championship and that new advertising deal with that big clothing line. The one he has turned down for years because he thought it was stupid. But now he will say yes because he wants to get more money so he can assure his beautiful wife and baby will always have a good life and never have to worry about money at all.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is a busy man with all the long hours he has to invest in training and in the preparation for his fights. But he always tells his personal assistant, Uraume, to make time in his busy schedule for your doctor appointments during the pregnancy. He wants to be by your side. Wants to drive you there and make sure you get there safely. He wants to hold your hand while the two of you look at the ultrasound of your tiny baby, letting you know that Sukuna will keep his word.

++ Boxer!Sukuna has always been a very caring boyfriend/fiancé, and now he is an even more caring husband and soon-to-be daddy. Seeing you with your big baby bump makes him want to wrap you in his strong arms at all times, ensuring you are safe and taken care of.

++ Boxer!Sukuna loves bonding with you and your baby that’s growing inside you. You laugh and tease him for being so clingy, but he knows you love it. Sukuna loves showering with you, standing behind you, so much taller than you, letting you lean against his strong body while he wraps his arms around you, holding you safely in his embrace, making sure you won't slip. His large hands sprawl over your swollen belly while his lips trail kisses from your neck to your shoulders, and he grins anytime he feels his little baby kick strongly against mommy's belly and daddy's hand.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is extremely protective of you and his little daughter once she is born. No pictures are allowed. The paparazzi don't even dare come to your street. They try it once when you get out of the hospital with your newborn baby, but Sukuna scares them off by punching one of them. He has a mad grin on his tattooed face, sneering at that guy and telling him, "If you or any of your colleagues come near my wife or child, I will do the same thing again, but this time I'll make sure to knock out some of your teeth."

++ Boxer!Sukuna has won so many fights, so many titles and yet nothing touched him like holding his little girl in his strong, tattooed arms, gently swaying her from side to side at 3 am, after Sukuna rolled over in bed and kissed your naked shoulder, telling you to get some more sleep, "I will take care of the little princess." And now he is gazing down at this tiny little baby. His and your baby. And somehow, his vision is so blurry, and his eyes feel so weirdly moist.

++ Boxer!Sukuna smiles, a real smile, as he blinks the tears that almost welled up away and tells his little daughter, "You are the most perfect baby ever, little one. Not like all those ugly brats I see everywhere." He laughs to himself, low and raspy, just when you come out of the bedroom, rolling your eyes as you walk up to him with a matching laugh falling from your lips. You get on your tiptoes to kiss the tattoos on Sukuna's cheek and tell him he is the worst, with a voice full of love, and Sukuna thinks he is the luckiest guy ever.

++ Boxer!Sukuna wraps one strong arm around you and pulls you against his tall, muscular body, hugging you gently while he carries your little baby in his other arm. Holding both of his girls, grinning because he knows this here is the best thing he ever had. Better than any title he has ever won and will ever win.

++ Boxer!Sukuna still needs you to kiss his boxing gloves before each fight. But now he also added a new ritual. Brushing over the soft hair of his little daughter with his boxing gloves before he leans down to press a kiss on her little forehead and tell her, "Daddy will win this fight. For you and mommy."

++ Boxer!Sukuna is mature enough to know that a boxing arena isn't the right place for a baby, so he would never ask you to sit in your usual spot but rather have you backstage, cuddling your daughter while you watch his fight on the screen without all the loud noises and the riled up atmosphere. But on the evenings, when you have a babysitter and you can sit in front of the boxing ring, Sukuna fights extra well, spurred on by the knowledge that you are there. Just like he fucks you extra good in his private locker room afterward, taking you hard and rough against the wall, loving that he and you can be as loud as you want here, making sure you squeal his name over and over again like a prayer.

++ Boxer!Sukuna still takes you on dinner dates on those nights when you have someone who looks after your daughter. Because he wants the two of you to always stay lovers, too, and not just mommy and daddy. He makes sure to savor those dates thoroughly, flirting with you, leaning across the table to kiss you and whisper dirty things in your ear, or complimenting you on how beautiful you look. He makes sure to not just fuck you all riled up after a fight but also make sweet slow love to you, telling you to look deeply into his maroon eyes as he rolls his hips against yours and lets you feel every inch of his long and thick cock.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is very passionate about his boxing career, but his little family always comes first. When you are sick, he cancels a big fight just so he can stay home and look after you and your daughter, and somehow, it makes him become even more popular because suddenly, the big, bad boxing champion seems a lot more human to everyone.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is adamant about teaching his little girl how to fight, just like her daddy. She gets her first boxing gloves on her third birthday. Pink ones with Hello Kitty on them, and Sukuna proudly shows her how to punch the little punching bag he bought for her and installed in the living room.

++ Boxer!Sukuna never wants his daughter to actually follow in his footsteps and become a boxer because he knows he won't be able to stand in front of the ring and watch his little princess get hit. But he is so proud of her when she punches her little punching bag.

++ Boxer!Sukuna tells his little girl to fight him, grinning his boyish grin as he circles around the living room doing a "boxing match" against his little one. He lets her land several punches on his abs, and Sukuna groans dramatically and sinks to his knees before he lets himself fall onto his side and lie there, holding back his laughter while you count to ten and declare your giggling daughter the winner.

++ Boxer!Sukuna is such a successful and feared boxer, always living up to his stage name, The King of Curses. So strong and intelligent, seemingly unbeatable. But the two of you are his big weakness. You brought Sukuna to his knees, and he loves every second of it.

Boxer!Sukuna never thought he would be a dad, but now that he is one, he can't even imagine how life was before the three of you became a family. His little family will always be his safe haven. His retreat after all the exhausting time in the boxing ring and in front of all those flashing cameras. This here is truly all he needs. His two girls. The two loves of his life. No matter how many titles Sukuna wins, the titles he will always be the most proud of are husband and daddy.

IT WAS SO NICE AND COMFORTING TO WRITE THIS 💗💗 He makes me so lovesick!! What a man!!

I hope this little story could give you comfort, too. Comments and reblogs would be very sweet 💗

[kxsagi]

May I request first time w bllk boys of your choice, but instead of it being steamy, it ends up being comic relief because for some reason the men can't put it in so the night just went on with gf!reader laughing her ass off and bf!bllk men having existential crisis😼 ignore this if you're uncomfortable! I love your works btw!:3 have a great day/night!

“𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐠𝐨 𝐢𝐧: 𝐚 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝𝐲”

a/n: this was definitely the most suggestive thing i've written so far but it was too funny to not write LMAO

thank you so much and have a great day/night as well!

suggestive and mature content below! all aged-up characters! (MDNI, by choosing to interact, it is your choice despite the warning)

ft. isagi yoichi, itoshi rin, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, kaiser michael, shidou ryusei, karasu tabito, itoshi sae

isagi yoichi

bro was so determined to win at losing his virginity. he was mentally prepping like it was a soccer match. 

“okay. breathe. visualize. go slow.” 

but the moment he tries to slide it in, he misses. three times. 

you’re trying not to laugh but he looks like a confused puppy with a furrowed brow and everything. 

“wait, i swear i aimed right.” 

“baby you’re not shooting a goal, this is not penalty kicks.” 

he spirals. his entire ego deflates. his internal monologue is screaming: how did i miss the goal this bad, am i even the main character anymore??? 

you’re just curled up in bed laughing while he sits at the edge with a blanket over his lap, muttering, “i need to train more…” 

itoshi rin

he was so serious about it. didn’t speak more than five words the whole time. 

but then. the moment of truth. and it just… 

boink (LMAO). he misaligned. 

“rin, that’s my thigh.” 

“shut up. i know.” 

tries again. ends up poking your belly button. 

“are you aiming by echolocation?” 

cue you dissolving into laughter while rin’s soul leaves his body. 

he gets all broody and dramatic like, “this is why i hate people. and romance. and life.” 

you pat his hair and go, “better luck next time, sniper.” 

nagi seishiro

he was so chill about it at first. like, “yeah. sex. sounds tiring, but okay.” 

except it turns out getting it in requires more effort than he thought. 

he’s just kind of poking around lazily like he’s half-asleep. 

“is this… the right angle?” 

“sei. that’s my hipbone.” 

he lays down in defeat like he just died in a video game. “ugh. i give up. let’s just cuddle.” 

and you’re crying laughing while he burritos himself in the blanket and says, “this is why i stick to games.” 

mikage reo

oh he thought he had it in the bag. mr. smooth rich boy. 

candles lit. music playing. rose petals on the bed. 

then cue 5 straight minutes of struggling. 

you: “babe, you okay?” 

reo: sweating bullets, whispering “i can’t find the entrance.” 

you: “it’s not a bank vault, reo.” 

poor boy looks so offended. “i’ve studied diagrams! i watched tutorials!” 

you’re cackling while he’s looking at the wall like it betrayed him. 

“this is not how it was supposed to go… my legacy…”

kaiser michael

listen. this man walked in like he was god’s gift to earth. said some cheesy german line like “tonight, i make you scream.” 

0 for 1 on that promise. 

because for the life of him, he can’t get the angle right. 

tries. fails. tries again. misses again. 

“i swear this never happens.” 

“you sound like a sitcom punchline.” 

and then you wheeze-laugh so hard you fall off the bed. 

kaiser just lies there dramatically like an oil painting, one arm draped over his forehead. “i’ve been humbled.” 

will not stop bringing it up later. “remember that time my genius was too much for your mortal body to handle?” 

you: “you poked my knee.” 

him: “semantics.” 

shidou ryusei

bro walked in already unhinged. 

smirking like a menace. said “i’m gonna blow your back out” with way too much confidence. 

cut to five minutes later: he’s on his knees, staring at your thighs like they’re a puzzle. 

“where the hell is it? is this a trap?” 

“shidou. shidou. that’s my armpit.” 

“oh. well you were twisted weird!” 

you’re crying from laughing. this man was so loud and proud only to fumble like a rookie. 

suddenly goes quiet. shidou. quiet. 

stares at the wall like he saw god. 

“maybe this is the universe humbling me…” 

you: “finally.” 

him: “shut the hell up, you’re laughing like a hyena. i’m in mourning.” 

karasu tabito

okay so karasu definitely talked a big game beforehand. 

super smug like “you won’t be able to walk after this.” 

tried to take the lead. acted confident. 

then proceeded to line himself up completely wrong. 

you’re like, “tabi. that’s not it.” 

he freezes. “you sure? feels right.” 

“no. no it doesn’t.” 

looks down. stares in betrayal. “oh… oh.” 

you start laughing and cannot stop. 

he lays on his back dramatically like he just got shot. 

“i used to have pride. i used to have a future.” 

you’re snorting, tears in your eyes while he covers himself with a pillow and mutters “don’t talk to me. i’m in my flop era.” 

itoshi sae

sae genuinely thought he was above this. like… this was supposed to be effortless. 

gave you a look like “i got this.” 

spoiler: he did not. 

tries to guide himself in and hits… air. 

tries again. pokes the mattress. 

you: “… are you okay?” 

him: “this is… frustrating.” 

you start giggling. he’s deadpan. 

“don’t laugh.” 

you: “but you’re so SERIOUS. it’s like watching someone try to parallel park and give up.” 

he sighs, rolls off you, and just stares at the ceiling like it offended him. 

“sex is stupid. i’m going to sleep.” 

you’re still laughing while he tucks himself in like a burrito, mumbling “this is why i focus on football.” 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

[allpiesforourown]

Okay let me tell you guys about one of my fav bingyuan aus.. bingge having a one sided rivalry with shen yuan

He had to get a scholarship and work his ass off to afford college, had to put on a fake smile and network like crazy.. so naturally when he sees shen yuan, this guy who was born rich and is naturally extroverted, he hates it

Shen Yuan on the other hand, thinks binghe is super cool! He looks like what he'd imagine a stallion protagonist to look like! Not to mention he's athletic, intelligent, beautiful, just perfect in every way!

Binghe is always trying to rile up shen yuan and "expose" him as a terrible person pretending to be good, so their interactions go like this:

Binghe: so you're entering this contest too? Ha, don't waste your time. You know youre leagues behind me

Shen yuan: you're also entering? Great! I can't wait to see you perform :)

Binghe, flustered: FUCK YOU.

Ning yingying is binghes childhood friend and binghe barges into her apartment every other day to rant about this guy.

Binghe: I hate shen yuan!!! Who does he think he is!! Acting all high and mighty !!!

Yingying, who doesn't understand but wants to be supportive of her friend: yeah a-luo, fuck that guy

Binghe: and then even after I rubbed it in his face that I won, he had the audacity to say "I hope I'll get to see you perform next year" can you believe that!?!??!

Yingying: ...?

Shen yuan gets seriously sick before a competition one day and binghe wins by a landslide. He's looking around the whole time, wondering where shen yuan is. He can't make fun of him for coming in second if he isn't here...

Binghe finds out shen yuan was hospitalized and he leaves before they can award him his trophy. Shen yuan wakes up to binghes panicked face saying "how dare you, you didn't come just because you knew I'd win? You were that ashamed of how superior I am to you? You better get better soon or else..!" Shen Yuan is do confused because why does binghe look like he's about to cry? Why is binghe visiting him everyday with healthy boxed lunches "to help him recover quicker" ??

Shen yuan returns to school and he's crowded by classmates asking where he's been/how he's doing. Binghe is off to the side, refusing to come over, but obviously sneaking glances at him. Shen Yuan smiles and waves and binghe looks away but his face is red

[masked-daydream]

DATE EVERYTHING! SELF-AWARE AU

Unhinged! Player x Self-Aware! Dateables

Another version of the Self-Aware Au by writing-munchies but the Player is like @kingtism1 aka Antonio from TikTok who says the most unholy stuff to every dateable.

like I said I will quote some of the unhinged stuff that the guy says and also add some of my own. I really recommend you guys watching his interactions but only if you are 🔞 like this fic.

I WANT TO... (Pt. 2)

Crossposted on Ao3

Part 1, Part 2

⚠️ 🔞 Content Incoming ⚠️

'What in the absolute hell was that?!'

You say to yourself while resting in bed after you immediately shut down your computer after the most weirdest thing that has happened to you.

'Is it possible that it's just part of the game?'

You wonder remembering the moment when Keith the bastard Key manages to call your name perfectly like his voice actor literally pronounced your name as the character looked at you with his gray eyes.

You keep thinking about that moment as tossing and turning in your bed then you immediately sat up staring at your desk where your computer lies.

As much as you are spooked by that interaction, you remember your research about the Keith on the net on how he was a Content-Aware character meaning there was a chance that interaction was part of his creation.

'Yeah.. maybe that's why...'

You try to convince yourself, as you stared towards your computer you begin to feel a weird pulling sensation like an urge to go and play the game again.

I mean even with that odd interaction you still really love the game, the characters, the voices, hell you really miss the way some characters blush while you're flirting with them. Which is probably the reason why you cannot hold your tongue and start saying your deepest desires.

You begin to sit up from your bed looking at your computer for a moment and for a few minutes you begin to think for a bit.

'It's just one creepy interaction, what's the worse that could happen?'

Then you finally sat on your gaming chair preparing to open your computer to play the game. Promising yourself to just play for an hour after all it's the middle of the night and you just want to confirm if what happened is just another glitch in the game, maybe it will only happen on one character...

As time passes...

As you begin another playthrough of the game you can't help but admire the characters once again

Each treble of their voice went through your skin and through your heart as you interacted with another flirty character.

Volt one of the two personifications of electricity is currently making your heart rate spike a little too fast with his deep-accented voice you can't help but let your impulsive thoughts win.

"How about you explore my holes you stud, I want you inside my pussy and my ass - Get Eddie too I need you both to double penetrate the fuck out of me- Eiffel tower me! Please get active and fill me with your cum!"

You say with no shame to the currently blushing character. Not knowing about the dirty thoughts also going around the Electricity personified's head after hearing your confession.

Volt knew about your dirty habit on telling your deepest desires from the other objects from the household. He just didn't expect that your desperation not only applies to him but to Eddie as well.

He then licked his lips knowing that you won't notice his actions. As he has quite a strong control over his sprite that you won't notice any difference from his character unless...

He then changed his character sprite to the one where his holding his hand out to the player as his light-blue eyes stare at you and his other hand settles on his chest. As he goes out of script for one line.

"Well now let's not get ahead of ourselves livewire, I'm sure that me and Eddie will have time to fulfill anything you desire~ ;)" Volt declares his voice getting a bit more deeper as he speaks.

Your face gets more redder as you hear Volt's next line not knowing that he went out of script. But you feel his electric eyes stare into your soul making you grow a bit hotter.

"Damn. This fucking game..." You say to yourself as you cover your flustered face with your other hand, as you click again his sprite changing back to his normal one as Volt continues his usual lines.

You didn't notice Volt smirking at your reaction. As he plans to get you to love Him and Eddie more as you interact with them.

As more time passes as you play the game you get a bit more tired slowly closing your eyes hearing Volt and Eddie's voice as you nearly accomplished their love ending... You then lay your head on the side of your desk, closing your eyes as sleep finally took you.

You didn't notice the arms slowly going around you, carrying you to your bed.

You also didn't notice someone touching your face gently as you sleep and you also didn't notice the kiss given to your lips like a promise they plan to fulfill.

And you also didn't notice your game saving by itself and you're computer turning off by itself as well.

You didn't notice as you slept deeply feeling the touch of someone who wants you inside and out.

The Next Day...

As you begin another playthrough you notice some characters getting a bit more flirty than usual.

Infact those who are not normally as Flirty are having lines that clearly imply that they're very interested in your character (or just probably you in general).

Making you get more flustered than usual you couldn't help but get more and more redder as every character say's a line that clearly imply something more dirtier than usual.

You didn't really think much of those lines as it fits the current scenario I. What's happening for each character. So you clearly didn't mind.

Infact you were quite happy that you managed to get a lot of the love endings. So you have decided to go through the harder ones to romance to see if lady luck is shining on you today.

As you aimed your dateviators to the vacuum you then mentally prepare yourself for the Vacuum personified as you have already saw him during Eddie and Volt's route and also reading some comments about the game on him being one the hardest ones to romance to the point that others say they needed a guide.

You finally decided to just see the route for yourself and play without the guide, you might as well challenge yourself instead of doing things the easy way.

Your eyes then widened at the handsome face who for some reason is already blushing, appear on your screen. You then let the first words that come to your mind out without thinking

"Yeah...He may be the vacuum but I'm the one that's doing the sucking." You move closer to the screen admiring the beauty in red and white.

"Whip out your penis- I'm gonna suck and blow you - you beautiful fine piece of ass."

Henry Hoove know's what to expect from you infact everyone in the household knew what to expect from you every time you open that sinful mouth.

He just truly wasn't ready for it. As you approach the laundry room where he and other dateables are located he thought you picked someone else.

Imagine his suprise when you open the closet door and with no hesitation immediately aimed the dateviators at him. He didn't have time to prepare himself as he hears your dirty confessions about him.

He feels his pants getting more tighter as you offer to blow him. As he tries to control his character sprite to change into his first pose.

As he finally changes his sprite into a normal one and say his intended lines. He can't help but observe you as your eyes keep staring at him intently, very willing to pay attention to your choices so you can get the Love ending with him.

He knows he's a hard one to romance but maybe he would try to make your interaction with him a little easier. After all he really wanted you to hold on to your words and also get a piece of you as well. ❤️

'Oh~ how bold'

Ben-Hwa thought to themselves as they hear your extremely unholy confession. Every word you say makes every part of their body shiver with excitement as they also imagine doing the things you say as she observes you from your head to your hips.

They feel a bit disappointed that they cannot see your bottom half from this angle, but they just settle in hearing more about how you want to be dominated by them.

"-want you to use any type of sex toy you have on your body right now on me as I beg for you for more as you tease my holes till I break an-" You rambled as more words come out of your mouth getting more dirtier by the second.

If Ben-Hwa had a type of music they like, it'll definitely be your voice as you confess your sins or in the future probably you whimpering and moaning underneath them.

"-od I want you to to just use me as your sex toy- right now!"

They just smile, already planning the ways to make your dreams come true~

As you click Mac's screen you hear their cheery voice through the screen of your own computer.

You sigh dreamily remembering their interactions with you before you achieved their love ending.

"I want this computer so fucking bad, I will literally lay it on the floor and start rubbing my pussy lips- up and down the screen, leaving trails all across it - I need it so fucking bad- I'm taking e-sex to a whole new level with this computer- You don't even understand-" you stop yourself getting a bit aroused as you move your character away from the computer.

God you are getting way to desperate for the characters on this game.

You didn't even notice the computer themselves breathing heavily as they imagine you doing that to them, as Mac feels their insides purr with want.

As they hear your character move away from them, they immediately touch themselves through their pants and begins to try and relieve themselves just with their imagination of you and the scenario you gave them.

As Tyrell begins to talk more about his towel buddies he hears you talk in an urgent tone then he immediately went silent as he realizes, on what you just said

"Tyrell, you're making my pussy wet- so get down there with your towel. And when by towel I mean your dick and get to drying my pussy!" You demanded licking your lips as you stared at Tyrell.

Tyrell's shocked face turned red as your words finally register into his mind as he begins to stutter as you click on him.

"Th-th-th-th-those w-w-ere...." Tyrell tries to say his next line.

But as your words begin to settle on his mind and the redness on his face moved to his lower half, he immediately ran away-

Cutting of your interaction with him as your screen begins to freeze and turn black.

Your eyes widen in confusion as you clicked your mouse urgently, just as you stopped and decided to check the screen.

Your computer opens again with the game still on but you're character is just looking at the towel where your last interaction with Tyrell is supposed to be.

"What the hell just happened?" You ask knowing that no one will answer, as you begin to wonder again.

'Maybe it's another glitch' You think to yourself but as your mind wanders on why-

A text box pop out of your screen. Your eyes widened bewilderment but you couldn't help but let curiosity get the best of you as you click the text box.

Your shock turned to fear as you hear the narrator read the text as your heart skipped a beat.

(They want you as much as you do, If given a chance. Would you let them fulfill your desires?)

(Yes.)

(No.)

Choose Wisely...