#and since they've started asking questions about my favourite things

[rosylavender-lady]

My favourite colour

I like the colour of the night where it's just blue enough to not be black, one that a friend and I struggled to decide a name upon that has left the tip of my tongue. I like the colour of the flush across my cheeks when I look in the mirror after New Years, where I stared at fireworks with a friend behind me, arms wrapped around my waist. I like the colour of a friend's eyes when I'm staring at her in the middle of math, and the summer sun lights up the shades of green and blue and brown and I wonder if I look just as beautiful. They told me I have eyes of chocolate. I wonder if my eyes make their throat burn the way chocolate burns mine as I eat them, if they regret it when they look again like I eat again because I get dopamine from it. I like the colour in the background of the mirror because I'm not sure I can keep looking at my face knowing I'm loved and not quite knowing why.

[the-offside-rule]

Max Verstappen (Red Bull Racing) - Explain

Requested: yes

Prompt: 18) "My mum thinks we're dating."

Warnings: Max being dumb asf

Y/n and Victoria had been friends for as long as they could remember. They would visit eachothers houses, carpool to school, go shopping on the weekends; you name it, they did it and they did it together. Now both girls had a set of rules for eachother and Victoria's number one rule was not a surprise at all; her brother was off limits. Y/n didn't have a problem with it because well, Max was older and they rarely talked. Even as children she didn't like him that way, mainly because as a child she thought he looked like a strange lizard of some sort. When Max became a Formula One driver, Y/n found herself with Victoria less and less due to her still having to stay in school, whilst Victoria travelled the world with her brother for a good part of the academic year. But it didn't tarnish their friendship in any way.

In fact, once Y/n graduated from high-school, Victoria managed to get her to a few races that the whole Verstappen family attended. She grew closer with the family as a whole and even became one of the regulars in the paddock after a while. However, Y/n went on to study in Italy and her paddock appearances were significantly lowered to once or twice a year.

The weekend of Monza 2023 was a special one to say the least. Y/n smiled as she walked into the paddock with Victoria, like she did every other time. The cameras took photos, like they did every other year and they walked straight to the hospitality. "I missed this place." Y/n sighed as she looked around the hospitality, holding her godson Luka's hand as he waddled about the place. "I know. They've changed a few things since you've been here last." Victoria smiled as she wheeled the stroller through the paddock. "And where is the golden boy himself?" Y/n asked, obviously referring to Victoria's now two-time world champion brother.  "He's with Mama. They're having their weekly lunch like they usually do." Y/n nodded. "I can't wait to chill in the hospitality. I'd argue it'd my favourite place."

Just as she said she would, Y/n sat in the  hospitality of Red Bull. She got her usual place; a table by the window that overlooked the whole paddock, and close enough to Ferrari so she could get a glimpse of Charles Leclerc walking by. All heads snapped around as the heard large footsteps pounding up the stairs and there appeared a delirious looking Max Verstappen. They locked eyes and Max began walking over to her quite quickly. Did he really miss her that much?

"Hi, Max. How are you-" Max sits down rapidly, making Y/n freeze and look at the dutchman as if he had two heads. "I have a problem. Well, no. We- we have a problem." Max said, stumbling on his words. "You look like you've just seen a ghost." Y/n chuckled as she continued to scroll through her phone. "I- I think I really messed up." Max muttered. Y/n scoffed in reply. "Can't be worse than the time you-" She paused and looked at the familiar face of Max's I fucked up face. "What did you do?" She asked, not putting the phone down. "I- You're going to hate me." Max said. "What have you done?" She asked again. "My mum thinks we're dating." Max blurted out, leaving both of them in stunned silence. "She what?!" She put her phone down and stood up. "I know! It was really dumb!" Max repeated over and over again. "Max! Why did you tell her that!"

"It was an accident!" Max replied defensively. "What exactly did you say?!" Y/n asked. "Well she said we would make a cute couple and I kind of joked that well, what if we were but nobody knew. And then she started smiling like that and asking questions so I just went with it so now-" He paused. "Now she thinks we're together." Max mumbled the last bit. "Max, you need to tell her we aren't!" Y/n said. "But why? She seems so happy-"

"Max! Victoria might actually murder me! I have known her since we were seven!" Y/n whisper shouted. "It'll be fine! She won't know, I am sure of it-"

"Y/n?" Y/n froze as she heard her loving friend Victoria call out her name. Max and Y/n turned to see Victoria walking towards them, almost in the same fashion that Max walked over just a matter of minutes ago. "Victoria, I can explain!"

"Oh I'm so happy for you both! It makes so much sense now! Why you were looking for him this morning, I mean." Vuctoria squealed, engulfing Y/n in a hug. Max stood up chuckling along. "You- you're not mad?" Y/n asked, audibly confused. "Mad? Of course not! Me and Mama have said it many times; that the two of you should be dating. It's about time, to be honest." Y/n smiled and looked between the two Verstappens. "And you! Oh thank goodness you found a nice girlfriend after that last one, she was horrible." Max nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Even Dad is happy about you two!" Max and Y/n didn't know what to say. "And you all want us to...date?"

"Yes! For the longest time. It was so obvious you liked eachother too. So, so obvious." Max looked down at Y/n. The pair's faces turned as red as the Ferrari garage next door. "Well, I'll let you two lovebirds have some alone time. Ill see you both later?" Victoria asked, getting ready to leave. "Yes. Definitely."

"That didn't go how I thought it would." Y/n muttered. "Are we missing something? Do we like eachother but we're just too stupid to tell?" Max asked. "I- I don't know." She whispered. "But, I think we should tell them we aren't together before this gets out of hand." Y/n went to walk, but felt her hand being grabbed. She looked back to see Max. "Or we just play along until it dies down." Max suggested. "That is possibly the most stupid thing you've ever said." Y/n retorted. "Bot really. We both get benefits out of dating. You get recognition for being my girlfriend which comes with brand deals, magazine shoots-"

"I would never date you just for the benefits. I date someone because I love them."

"So so you love me?" Y/n didn't really know how to respond to that. Her mouth opened and closed, searching for the words but she couldn't couldn't a singular sentence. Max's grin widened. "Don't even! I'll see you around." Y/n said storming off, her face red from embarrassment. "Okay. Bye my love!" Max teased. "Shut up!" Did she like him? Did she love him? No! Of course...well....maybe.

[justin-chapmanswers]

hi Justin! just want to say I ADORE ii and it's one of my favourite shows out there; actually inspired me to start my own!

which is a lame segue into my question- do you have any advice for someone wanting to make their own show?

That's so exciting!! Art makes art!

Oh golly uhhhh. There's so so much to say in so many different departments. So. I'll keep it broad and of course anyone can ask more specific questions haha.

My go-to advice tends to be for creators to start as small as possible early on. Even if you aspire to create projects that are huge-in-scale down the line. So much about becoming a great artist involves moving through the stages of your art (whatever type it may be!) from start-to-finish, every step of the process, over and over and over again. So say in show creation, idk if you plan to be hands-on in every department or if you have a lot of help, but that could mean breaking down stories and outlining, writing, recording, constructing audio scenes and boarding, character and prop and background design, animating, music assembly, mixing, finalizing and editing, etc, over and over again. Obviously not every step may be involved in your project depending on what your goal is, but whatever it is that you do, do it sooooooooo many times.

While there's nothing inherently wrong with jumping in and making your first project something say, movie-length, or something immensely complex in scope, I do find it can, for many (not all) be limiting when it comes to learning a lot of fundamental building-blocks in craft. As well, I see a lot of people get lost in an overwhelming project, trying to focus on quality>quantity right out of the gate. But spending the majority of your time just on adding some extra polish as opposed to running through the whole process again and again can only do so much for you. Obviously, a mentality of quality>quantity is great once you have a strong baseline understanding of production. But again, I think it's a huge plus to work on shorts and teeny-projects to start.

Since the above is pretty dry, I'll add an additional fun one. I've found that a lot of newer artists will toss away the concepts that make them joyous in hopes that they can instead create something that fits an objective perception of "professional." Nothing wrong with that, but I strongly advise artists of all levels of experience to toss everything they've love about the world and other media into their work. Their favorite genres and tropes, the stupid inside jokes that make them light up with their friends that they can invite the audience in-on, adaptations of stories that have made them cry. Create the things YOU love to experience. It's fine to let go of what you think the audience wants. Cause that's not easily guessable. But what YOU enjoy is something certain to you. It's sorta like how they say, it's better to go to the gym and do an suboptimal-but-fun workout that keeps you coming every day than a perfect workout that leads you to quitting. Share your joy with the world, and someone will resonate!

Be silly, be cringe, have fun!

[vasyandii]

Hello! I just wanted to say that I absolutely adore your IHNMAIMS oc. I'm a OC x canon enthusiast and seeing a character so well written and adapted to the story as Vernon is makes me so excited!! Plus your art is literally amazing. I've been curious since you mentioned how Vernon cuts potions of her meal to give them to AM and how the food improved since AM got his body, what food/meals do Vernon and AM like/dislike/have as favourite? -for AM, at least from what he has tasted- Whether if it's because of the taste, flavour, etc.

Howdy Anon! Thank you so much for the kind words, I've been giddy since I got it a few days ago! I'm glad my OC x Canon content gets your stamp of Approval >:D!! 💞💞

VernonAM 🏺🖥️ Food Preferences

I think Vernon is careful in choosing the food she shares with AM because he will eat literally ANYTHING. She would try to eat things to torture herself with, extremely spicy foods, live insects, raw organs, etc. but then remember that she has to "Feed AM". So she opts out for something normal so his taste buds don't get fucked.

Or as normal as it can get, the food kind of has the uncanny valley effect as well. It looks normal and tastes normal, but she feels there's something a bit off about it (kind of like airplane food). So she often leaves criticism to the Chef™ (AM) or asks to cook instead.

Vernon isn't particularly picky when it comes to food, she'll eat it and clean her plate. She likes her food balanced, vegetables/meat with sauce and all that. If it tastes good, she'll eat it, y'know?

AM is more... difficult. Sure, he'll eat anything, but if it tastes really bad, it'll traumatize him and he'll refuse to eat it for a while.

His food has to not be touching, if it's mixed in all together beforehand he'll eat it. If there's sauce it shouldn't be close enough to where it can contaminate the food AM's eating because he WILL taste it, no matter how small the amount is. His utensils need to be a specific size, and the food HAS to be hot/warm. He needs to be able to see or know every ingredient in it.

It's observed that AM likes fried foods/anything crunchy because of how consistent they are in taste, texture, and flavour. So what ends up happening is Vernon will just include those foods into her meal, just to not eat it and have it on a little plate for him.

Vernon asks him why he can't just make food for himself, his response is "I don't need to eat, I eat when when you eat."

But honestly it's a pretty dumb question now that she's looking back on it. AM has all the knowledge in the world about food, everything ever made, everything he's never tasted. So he's basically asking Her, indirectly, "I don't know where to start or what's good. But you do. I trust you. Feed me."

Now here's some of the meals They've had together (+ AM's comments):

Chicken soup ("Too wet", just ate the broth)

Caesar Salad ("Damp, Crunchy water")

Vanilla ice cream (experienced a brain freeze for the first time, thought his body was malfunctioning)

Spaghetti Bolognese ("No I will not be mixing it, you mix it for me")

Western beef stew (He picked out the potatoes and only ate those. Thought the meat was irritating to eat.)

Baby carrots. ("You know they bleach these, right?")

Asparagus (he likes them. Needs to be warm)

Broccoli (same thing)

Cheese Pizza (Ate it, ate too much. Tummy hurted.)

Tempura (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Fish and chips (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Coffee, black (spat it out)

Macaroni and cheese (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Grilled chicken hearts skewers (He liked it, but kept poking the roof of his mouth with the skewer.)

Half a Hamburger (picked out the vegetables because he didn't like them, still tasted it and gave the rest to Vernon)

Half a cheeseburger (ate it with no fuss.)

Aaand that'll be all for now :) if you made it this far, thank you for reading! If you need any clarifications, feel free to tell me!

[annisassintchaska]

AUDACITY: Toto Wolff x Wife!Black!Reader

TW: CURSING, YELLING

The hectic race here in Monza had finally come to an end and it is now time for the post-race interviews. One by one, the drivers were asked questions about what happened during their drive and what they think could've been done differently; however, a specific question a young driver had pissed off the wife the Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 Team, Y/n Wolff as she march her way in front of the man, blocking the journalist's sight of him.

"Could you please repeat that question you asked?" Y/n asked to make sure she heard the man right. "I asked if he felt that since he hadn't been winning any races for Christian, if he thought that maybe his time here in Formula 1 is running out?" the man asked once again, this time with a bit of fear for what the shorter yet feisty woman had to say. "So, I wasn't hallucinating, I heard you correctly! Now let me educate you on something here since you seem to lack the knowledge! A driver's career doesn't just end because they've been constantly not making it to the podium, sure he hasn't been winning yet he did a damn good job at keeping himself in the top six and THAT should be praised considering the state of favouritism going on in his team. Next is to address the fact that yes, we all know that Christian Horner is an impatient man when it comes to certain things, however he would never be that foolish to let Sergio go and if he was, he would pay for it dearly at my hands as I would personally burn his headquarters and garages to ashes, not leaving a pinch of paper for him to start over from. Mark my words, as whatever it is that you call yourself, the post-race interviews are for questions about the race and shouldn't go to the extent of you putting doubts into any driver's mind. BE WARNED THAT THIS IS YOUR FIRST AND LAST WARNING AS YOU ARE WALKING ON THIN ICE SEEMING THAT I COULD'VE HAD YOUR CAREER ENDED ON THE SPOT. Now apologize!" She shouted in anger that someone who should've been able to be trusted to ask sensible questions was actually a complete idiot out for nothing but starting chaos.

"I'm very sorry Sergio, I didn't think my words would have been taken that seriously" said the man as he was on the verge of tears, out of fear that he almost lost his job due to a foolish question. "It's ok, no hard feelings. Just try not to make this mistake again or best believe she'll be back for you" Sergio said as he went over to hug the man, being in shock himself.

Toto had been doing an interview with his drivers, when George noticed what was about to happen and tapped Lewis on the shoulder. They both called for Toto's attention, where the trio along with their journalist, watched on as Y/n gave the visibly shaking man a piece of her mind. After that was done, the lady interviewing them decided to ask "So Toto, you've obviously seen what your wife had just done. What would your reaction be to her for this?" the journalist smiled as she awaited an answer from Toto who as himself looks genuinely scared. "My question is What the fuck do you all want me to do?! I'm not getting involve in that! The last time you all had me interfere, I was unable to sleep on my pillows for a month!" He replied in a panicked tone as Lewis and George were the only two who knew what his "pillows" meant. "Dude, you've got to be kidding me. You still call her breasts pillows? How comfortable could they be?" George asked in amusement that his boss was still obsessed with his wife's boobs. "Trust me Russ, they are very comfy, I've also added and new pair. The ass" Toto said making everyone, including the journalist laugh. "Alright, so I see you're unable to help the guy out, that's all the questions I have for you three. Have a nice rest of your day" the woman said as they replied, "Same to you."

Unbeknownst to them the cameras had still been filming LIVE and they manged to capture the response which sent the world into a spiral at the fact that such a giant of man's weakness was being able to sleep on his wife as it now became the biggest thing to tease him of whenever he did something he wasn't supposed to.

[hell-drabbles]

Lowkey angsty-ish kind ask, but legitimately curious on this concept of ”what if”—

What if: Companion just straight up... Like, gave up? Considering how many bullshits they went through for Ra-On and how their actions don't affect much on what is happening around Ra-On(Unless they just use their hands to get things done, which is nearly all the time), I knew the Companion is the friend who would want to see the better you and would fight for it to have you become the best version of yourself — but doesn't everyone have their limits at the end of the day?

Companion deserved to be wrapped in a blanket and given a warm tea alongside their favourite movie. (I also love how most of the anons treat Companion as a whole different set of character instead of self-insert, endearing)

Oh yeah that's another thing I want to focus on, the Companion had plenty of opportunities to just give up and leave, but chose to stay and fight, and it's becoming pretty clear, especially from our perspective, that it's not a very healthy decision they've made. Certainly, it seems altruistic and self-sacrificing, but you can't deny that there's a degree of selfishness baked into the Companion's being. They want for my Ra-on to be a better version of himself, but this lack of control over anything that's happening leads to the Companion reacting in anger, and that's not how you go about trying to help someone along on their journey of self-healing.

It just goes from a well-meaning friend trying to help you out, to an owner tugging at the near-ripping leash of their dog. Not good at all. And I'm here for that toxic dynamic the Companion and Ra-on have going on, since Ra-on over here doesn't really see the Companion as his equal. Thinks they're waaaay better than him, wants them to be way better than him, because then he'll be treated like the piece of shit is, because that's what he deserves.

It's… ough, it's a dynamic, threatening to consume one another in the worst ways possible.

But yeah, in the end, things will get better since my Ra-on does care for the Companion, but right now he's blinded by lust, muscles and is swimming in the euphoria of having a harem without having to put in any effort. He isn't really registering that the devils are… you know, devils. They're dangerous, but my Ra-on over here believes that they would never harm the Companion.

Sooo… shit probably starts changing when Leviathan comes into the picture. Ra-on too easily forgives him because his past is so sad and he's suffering even though he tried to kill Ra-on. But then Leviathan tries to kill the Companion, and that sets Ra-on off into a spiral, but a different kind of spiral. Starts questioning some devils and is just… horrified at the idea that if the devils wanted to, they'd have no problems with the Companion being gone. Yeah yeah they're… extreme but it's not like they're dangerous right??? Was under the impression that even if they constantly try to separate the both of them, the devils won't harm the Companion because if they wanted to, they would've done so already. Besides, they cherish Ra-on don't they? So shouldn't that treatment at least extend a little bit towards the Companion?

Haha. Oh the willful ignorance of this man. I wanna throttle him.

You wanna know something hilarious? My version of Ra-on is inspired by the main character from the anime School Days. At least, in part, and is vastly more pretty and handsome. I really love watching subpar to bad anime, it's very entertaining to me.

And I do love that, that everyone is treating the Companion like it, it's very cute. Tis a testament that I wrote a pretty compelling reader insert character. They go through so much shit that the audience whats to spoil them. And then there's me, where I will probably make them suffer worse since that is how I show my affection, hahaha.

Anyways, if they gave up… hahaha, oh it will make Ra-on suffer. Which is hilarious because he's probably the one that they should return home without him. He's a little bit in denial at first, but eventually gets the message that the Companion is done. Done with him and done with Hell. He'd make the assumption that they're going to Minhyeok, so at least Ppyong will see them, but nope, the Companion is going to leave Minhyeok too, which honestly a huge shock to his system.

Why Minhyeok? What did he do? Do you really want to be alone?

If the Companion is going to give up on Ra-on, they're gonna go the entire mile. And Minhyeok is too attached to Ra-on and could never force him to give Ra-on up too. They could be cruel, hell they're tempted to do that just so if Ra-on ever decides to return to earth, there's be nothing waiting for him, but that would just be too much trouble.

Well, either way, there's only going to be emptiness in Ra-on's life. And the Companion? Honestly, they'd move on pretty well. No tragic ending, and perhaps being visited by some devils that they no longer remember, and starting new friendships all over again.

Though that's assuming they left waaaay at the beginning, probably a little after meeting Leviathan and after his murder attempt on both Ra-on and the Companion. If the Companion leaves after, say, their angelification recovery arc, shit is going to go down, obviously. The angels really don't know when to give up and attempting to return to a human lifestyle before things are solved is just a recipe for disaster.

[mapofthemazeinthemirror]

Txt's favourite Christmas traditions with their kids

note: sorry it's so short! happy holidays, whatever you celebrate!

Soobin

Yes, it ends in a mess, and yes, half of the sweets are gone before they've really started decorating the cookies—he'll blame the kids, but he helped in more than just adult supervision. Truth be told, most of the time and energy is spent being silly, singing Christmas songs and dancing, but it's quality time. Quality time and a heavy dose of sugar. But when they decide to be determined at the task, they're focused on their efforts. The older one stands on a chair of her own, while the smaller of the two sits on Soobin’s lap and guides the spoon he's holding, laden with icing. They eat their creations while Soobin does the dishes, a Christmas movie and the music of his little girls' laughter playing in the background.

Yeonjun

Yeonjun's favourite thing about Christmas with his kids is watching their eyes lighting up when they see all the brightly coloured packages under the tree on Christmas morming. He gets so excited about it that he wakes up early like a kid himself. If his kids aren't up, he'll sneak in and wake them. He plays up his own reactions as they unwrap each gift, eyes and mouth wide as they turn excitedly to show him every toy they find inside the paper, a growing stack of toys he's going to have to wrestle out of the packaging afterwards. There are no fights over any of the presents because, of course, Yeonjun spoils them all, even though Santa gets the credit.

Beomgyu

Despite not liking the cold, Beomgyu always bundles up the kids (and himself) and takes them to the Christmas parade, always getting there early enough to get a front row seat. It's worth it for how much of a great time they all have. He waves along with the kids at the actors and dancers, smiling when they turn around to point out their favourite floats. By the end of the parade, there's always one kid in his lap, worn out from all the excitement. Before heading home, there's a stop at a cafe for hot chocolate—with marshmallows, his daughter is persistent in reminding him from the car ride to when he places the order, tugging on the sleeve of his jacket.

Taehyun

He loves going to the school Christmas concert. Watching the kids on the makeshift stage, singing along with their class to the carol, he watched them practice numerous times at home. Nodding along encouragingly for his daughter, who's little shy in front of the audience. Beaming when his son is one of the kids who the sings clearest of the mumbling group. When they run into his arms after it's over, he showers them with praise, and on the car ride home, they have their own mini concert singing along to the carols on the radio. Taehyun's kids are his pride, and he loves the holidays so much more since they came along.

Huening Kai

He wants to have a photo of his little ones with Santa every year until they're too old to believe. His oldest daughter, who has always been very inquisitive for her age, baffles Santa with the questions she asks, not satisfied with simply giving him a list of things she wants for Christmas. Kai helps to answer them, holding back a laugh as she watches the man scramble. When his youngest isn't sure, still at an age where he's funny about people he doesn't know, Kai sits beside Santa with him on his lap, showing him it's okay. After that, the kid waves to Santa every time he sees one, even on TV.

written by mapofthemazeinthemirror - do not repost my work in any form

[cookiemom6067]

hi, cookie mom! i have a question: you've podficced so many fics, and a big part of them are stevetony ones. you've covered a wide range of verses and tropes, so i am really curious what's your favourite kind of stevetony fics to enjoy for yourself, and (if they're different) what's your favourite kind to podfic — or if there's a specific way you choose the fics. you always seem to pair them really well with the giftee, so i wonder if that's also a factor? if you're not willing to share about that part of the process then i am just grateful to hear more about your favourite tropes and tags. thank you for everything you do 🥰❤️

Wow, I'm so flattered you asked!

I do love Steve/Tony because they are the epitome of "opposites attract." They are puzzle pieces that compliment each other perfectly. By the same token, it's easy to read them as two people who can really push each other's buttons. They're both incredibly stubborn, and they both are very prone to thinking they're right.

Regardless of 'verse, I like fics that showcase those elements of them both. So, enemies to friends to lovers is a big one for me, as are misunderstandings and mutual pining. Those tropes really lean into how easy it is for these two to make incorrect assumptions about what the other is thinking.

For the most part, I prefer a happy ending, even if it takes a while to get there.

Excellent writing that displays an understanding of the inner lives and flaws of these characters is really enjoyable for me. Because MCU Stony is not equal to 616 Stony or Ultimates Stony (my favorite assholes), I adore a writer who understands the nuances that distinguish those 'verses.

Something that has really driven my podficcing for the last three years is a resolution I made to gift podfics to people who comment. One of the things I treasure about fandom is the gift culture. We do these things, whether it's a fic, a podfic, a vid, a playlist, or a piece of art, for each other. Or, more accurately, that's why we post them. If all I wanted was to record for my own enjoyment, I wouldn't have to post anything at all.

You ask an interesting question about how I choose what to podfic.

Sometimes, i read a fic and can't rest until I've recorded it. Sometimes, it's for a fest or an exchange, though I have such a backlog of gifts to do that I haven't done many of those sorts of events recently. Sometimes, it's a fic that I am led to by the giftee.

My big secret to pairing a gift to a giftee is to look at what they've bookmarked. I have come to love snooping through bookmarks. I have found so much cool stuff that way.

If they haven't bookmarked anything, I make what has been a safe assumption that if they commented on a podfic that they would enjoy something similar. Among the fics that might work, i tend to do the ones by authors who have granted blanket permission or those that have given me permission to do their fics. I've started being more general when I ask for permission rather than ask about specific fics, so those are kind of like blanket permission.

Since I have a backlog that will soon exceed a year, I tend to select things that are not over 50k words (though it's clear from my works that it isn't a hard and fast rule by any means)

I prefer fics that haven't been podficced by someone else, but that's not a hard and fast rule, either. I've come to learn how a podfic can make fics accessible to people who have challenges with vision or dyslexia or can't read long fics. So, it makes sense to expand the selection for those folks. I also don't want to step on another podficcer's toes.

Just recently, I've started to podfic more ficlets and short fic because it's just so satisfying to do something that I can finish in an hour or two of my time. There are so many little gems out there. Writers are amazing.

I can't stress enough how much more likely I am to do works by authors who have given blanket permission. If you would like a template for doing that, my pinned post has great suggestions.

Thanks for asking!

[nice-profession-mechanic]

A (to my knowledge) exhaustive list of Religions of Tyria rated by how trustworthy and dead their gods are.

The Five

Congregation: most humans

Dead: 2 of the known 8 gods of this pantheon of 6 are known to be dead (cause we killed them)

Trustworthiness: The fuckers flaked and left Tyria a hundred years before shit started getting dangerous.

Blurb: 6 ageless creatures who each hold a mantel of incredible power and draw further power from the faith of thise who believe in them while bringing some people back from the dead for fun.

The Unseen Ones

Congregation: A small section of humans

Dead: fuck i hope so. The player has played an active part in their extinction.

Trustworthiness: nope, used their religion to try and usurp the authority of the king and do a bunch of unethical science experiments. Also had anyone with the potential to rumble the ruse killed under false pretences. Had their first prophet imprisoned in a weird forever jail for 150+ years for asking questions.

Blurb: Invisible wizards who flaked on their last proper fight to keep their wealth, then later started a cult to avoid a prophecy that would lead to their extinction.

Spirits of the Wild

Congregation: Most Norn

Dead: We recently learned they can't die while the thing they represent in Tyria is still common.

Trustworthiness: Yeah, 4 of them took a bullet for the Norn so they could flee and survive a battle that would otherwise have killed them all.

Blurb: the least scary is the spirit of bunny, which represents bunnies. The most scary is the spirit of darkness...which you don't want to meet.

Titans

Congregation: The char, but only in the past

Dead: they were, apparently there were more in the Mists so now we gotta kill 'em all again

Trustworthiness: nope, it was just a cult using oppression and picking favourites to manipulate the Char into worshipping them and doing their bidding.

Blurb: what if the most flammable guy was 2 stories tall and insisted that fire was the best way to show fealty.

Zaishien

Congregation: battle junkies humans

Dead: Allowed to escape dead baby jail by Logan Thackery's almost male-wife, personally put in the ground for good by the player, eaten by their daughter and daughter's maternal grandpa.

Trustworthiness: Less over time, Balthazar used to be all about face punching. But when his free all-you-can-faith-buffet was at risk he started being a wanker.

Blurb: If dying gloriously in battle is your vibe, come live on a tropical island in the middle of the ocean with the most oiled up battle junkies you've never met. Also, death is avoidable if you do a good job. Also, we're training to invade the centre of the universe or go there when we die for good.

Zephyrites

Congregation: A flying church of monks who live in zeplins who are following the last of the unfulfilled Flameseeker Prophecies who use bits of their god's corpse to double jump.

Dead: Tyria's best and brightest got Glint killed in their attempt to kill her dad.

Trustworthiness: Unless Glint is playing the longest of long cons, she is very trustworthy. Her powers of prophecy and understanding of the way magic worked in Tyria allowed her to continue to affect the world long after she died.

Blurb: Was anti-brainwashed in the year 11,000 years ago and used her prescient powers of prophecy to help the mortals races of the world. Is the reason the Unseen Ones went to those lengths to not go extinct.

Mellaggan

Congregation: All Quaggans

Dead: yep, killed by snake people

Trustworthiness: quite, she has lead the Quaggans from danger on several occasions after being dead.

Blurb: a goddess of bounty, human scholars insist the Quaggans are actually worshipping the human goddess Melandru since they've repurposed some of her sunken temples, but the Quaggan insist they're different.

Ameyalli and Zintl

Congregation: Hylek

Dead: Ameyalli might have been Mordremoth, and that guy is very dead. Zintl is the literal sun, and that seems to still be present.

Trustworthiness: The rise of the Mordrem has given the Hylek reason to doubt Ameyalli. Hard to distrust the sun, what with its dispassionate warmth cast on all below it.

Blurb: Frog people have sensible gods, more at 11.

Celestial

Congregation: Canthan people, people who can see the stars

Dead: can't kill an idea. you can seemingly freely kill their physical embodiments in Tyria since it doesn't affect the stars they represent.

Blurb: the stars represent stuff and if it's the right time of the year they'll let you pick a fight with them to earn the right to be lucky.

The Eternal Alchemy

Congregation: Most Asura

Dead: you can't kill an idea and this one is the idea that "stuff can be understood"

Trustworthiness: not really trustworthy when it's a dispassionate world anthropomorphised as an equation that can explain any problem that no one has proved is real and has driven most people who got close mad.

Blurb: what if string theory was a macro scale problem

The Great Dwarf

Congregation: himself

Dead: getting there, there's only so many dwarves left

Trustworthiness: does exactly what it said on the tiny, very trustworthy

Blurb: do you wanna be a hive mind? And also turn to stone? Be an ageless being, go underground, and fight forever more?

Koda

Congregation: bear people

Dead: oh yeah, koda was once a guy, that guy is dead. His ideals and philosophies and somehow voice live on.

Trustworthiness: hard to say when you're listening to mysterious voices and auguries. Also, sometimes seems to drive people mad and that's a good thing?

Blurb: I'm just not gonna have a colonialists mindset and say nothing

[batsplat]

about 2007 motegi, i’ve really thought a lot… when valentino congratulated casey on his title, he specifically mentioned his championship t-shirt. from my observation there wasn’t anything particularly special about it, it might just be valentino’s joke

but casey really cared about valentino’s actions… he not only wanted valentino’s verbal congratulations but also asked just like why didn’t you come shake my hand!!! i should get the same treatment as nicky!!!😠

(vaguely following on from this and this post) oh I remember the shirt, it's actually one of my favourite bits of niche valentino/casey lore!! valentino isn't JUST being a facetious dickhead here, his name is literally on casey's 2007 championship shirt as one of casey's heroes:

isn't this crazy?? I've never been able to find a great source for the actual list of names, so god knows how exclusive this club was... apparently casey also had the names of his ducati crew on there, which is a nice touch tbh. but he had valentino's name on that shirt!! given how by this point he was already mad at valentino for switching up towards him, it's such a funny choice to make. literally nobody would have questioned his exclusion! you're competing against the guy! idk, I love it when casey does something just a little unexpected like that, really makes you want to poke at the guy to figure out what his deal is. and pleasingly, we do also have an actual clip of valentino commenting on the shirt:

Yes, like I say before, it's a great pleasure that one of my fans wins the world championship - so I think half is also mine!

look at his smirk. insufferable. just a fantastic dynamic they've got going on, isn't it

but I did NOT know about casey complaining about not getting a cooldown lap handshake. and. lol?? casey?? come on. some dignity, please. I can't believe they actually got valentino to respond to that. reminds me of a similar-ish 'controversy' from 2010 about how jorge was accused of deliberately ignoring future teammate ben spies coming to congratulate him on the cooldown lap, as like... a form of sophisticated mind games ig. at least there it wasn't actually spies complaining. you can tell that even casey upon reflection probably decided this wasn't a legitimate grievance by how he's not brought it up again since... valentino did have a pretty nightmarish motegi race for annoying tyre-related reasons, so was understandably not in a great mood, and he was not in fact the defending champion... so like. I checked the footage and reckon valentino probably could have worked a little harder to get over to casey, but also this is obviously an extremely petty thing to complain about

and while we're talking petty, the ghostwriter of casey's autobiography thinks that casey was also pissed at valentino at the next race in phillip island for *checks notes* having a special helmet design at casey's home race? incredible scenes

literally started off the infamous phillip island streak with a spite win. your regular reminder that casey says in his autobiography that he doesn't use his rivals to motivate himself

estoril, the race before motegi, was also the race where they had their little table football date [ed.: originally thought it was at motegi itself rip. nope, table football was at the first matchpoint race]

so late 2007 is when casey really starts going in on how valentino had cooled off towards him AND talking about not liking valentino's tone in the press, that valentino wasn't as complimentary of him as he'd been at the start of the season... which might be true, but casey wasn't exactly a shrinking violet either when answering questions about valentino. as an example, this is how he's talking about valentino in july of 2007:

"This rule is not good and we need more tyres," Rossi said earlier in the week, "The problem is for the show because, at the end, it is the tyre that decides the race." "At the beginning of the season, Valentino and the others were all for the new tyre rules," Stoner points out, "but, as soon as they don't win, the rule is crap. I've had my bad races this year, especially in Germany, and I'm not complaining about the tyre rule. "They can moan and whinge about it as much as they want, but it shows that [Michelin] has had such an advantage in the past. This season, they cannot bring a tyre in just for the race [and] it's a matter of relying on the company that supports you to do a good job."

"moan and whinge" steady on casey

valentino over the years has talked about this rivalry far less than casey has... which includes not being all that interested in diagnosing when things soured interpersonally between the two of them - beyond saying a couple times in 2010-12 during the pettiest phase of the feud that casey hadn't gotten over laguna. mostly this isn't that big a problem because valentino's side of the rivalry is so much more straightforward, but it's still obviously not ideal. it's that relative scarcity which makes the following interview answer from 2009 one of my other favourite tidbits:

"He bases his sentences on the results. Even at the beginning of 2007 he was giving me a lot of compliments, then, after winning the World Championship, he started with heavy criticism."

isn't it lovely that casey thinks valentino switched up his tone towards him because casey started winning, and valentino thinks casey switched up his tone towards valentino because casey started winning... just nicely mirror each other, don't they. such good foils

so taking all these pieces of evidence together... you get a really nice sense of how casey by end of 2007 was all over the place wrt valentino. he misses valentino being as friendly to him as in years past!! he liked valentino congratulating him by rubbing his head in qatar 2007 :) enough to mention that parc fermé interaction THREE TIMES in his autobiography!! doesn't appreciate not getting his hand held after sealing the title :( is increasingly surly that whole year about how nobody is giving him enough credit for his successes :/ is building on a reputation already established in 2006 for being rather an outspoken character when it comes to complaining about everyone in complaining range... but also has an issue with valentino being rude about him in the press :| but still puts valentino on his championship shirt on his list of heroes <3 like... buddy. what is going on here

part of what's going on ofc is that casey takes offence incredibly easily and valentino can be a pretty offensive character. now, again, I really don't think valentino was doing that much in 2007, but obviously my standard for 'valentino being reasonably respectful to rivals' is probably rather different to 2007!casey's standards. it's the malice casey reads into valentino's actions that I reckon is mostly misplaced... like yeah sure valentino distances himself from championship rivals, but. y'know. that's pretty normal behaviour. the fun thing about 2007 is that knowing valentino's entire feud history, you're sort of primed to read it as valentino being the aggressor... but if anything, casey is generally openly ruder towards valentino than vice versa. now obviously, valentino at this stage is a lot better at the subtler, under the radar nastiness that must be infuriating to be subjected to... but y'know, at the end of the day valentino still isn't openly attacking casey. and when discussing this rivalry, it's crucial to acknowledge what an extremely prickly character casey is - that's what makes it so enjoyable!! even better, he's an extremely prickly character who is very ready to make enemies but is ALSO kind of weird about valentino rossi specifically

and yes, having a valentino rossi complex is basically part of the job description if you're a motogp rider of a certain age. still, always important to acknowledge that all of valentino's feuds with younger riders involved guys who were already A Bit Weird about valentino going into the rivalry, which inevitably affected how those respective rivalries ended up laying out. what's so fun about it is that all three of them express it in completely different ways - from jorge's somewhat deranged level of dedication to analysing valentino's every breath, to marc's overenthusiastic commitment towards imitating valentino and beating him and also throwing himself at him at every opportunity, to casey's rather more repressed approach where he's simultaneously extremely sensitive to any possible offence on valentino's part while also kind of wishing they could be friends...? or something? I don't even know what casey's after! doesn't help that he's subsequently retconned this period where he like... kinda looked up to valentino, sure, and respected him and all that - but certainly no mention of putting valentino on championship celebration shirts. so we still have quite a limited amount of evidence at our disposal, but I would gently suggest that casey's cool, composed 'didn't even care who I was beating' rhetoric doesn't quite match up to reality. and casey thinks that valentino got more critical of casey because he was losing and valentino thinks casey got more critical of valentino because he was winning... and the thing is, they're both going to be somewhat right!! attacking rivals from a position of strength is actually kinda part of both of their preferred MO's - it's a similarity between them that plays into how casey at times gets to play the valentino role in this rivalry. so yeah, casey will have almost certainly gotten even mouthier once he could get away with it. but equally, even though valentino wasn't escalating hostilities by his standards, even just his natural process of distancing himself a little from his direct title rivals and getting a tad snarky about them in the press wasn't exactly being well received by casey. and thus they can both say with some justification that the other rider was a lot friendlier towards them at start of the year, and both will have reacted to this in a way that helped further gradually ramp up the level of hostility. lovely stuff

still, you do have to come back to how imbalanced this rivalry was wrt how emotionally invested the pair of them were. having a firm grasp of their dynamic in 2007 is key to understanding how the whole thing subsequently played out, in part casey was less guarded and just a little more likely to let a few things slip... valentino wants to beat this challenging new rival, but I reckon he's mostly being sincere in that his main frustration in 2007 is feeling like he's not even able to fight casey at all for bike/tyre reasons. it's a rivalry he generally enjoyed when they were actually going at it! a comfort zone rivalry that really isn't all that emotionally messy from his side. even if he'll maybe still imply casey's compliments of him were never sincere, seeing how they dried up over the course of 2007... or perhaps joke about casey putting his name on his championship winning shirt, how at least he's losing to a fan... something fun about how valentino is always aware of that idolisation dynamic and is capable of playing with it, just a little. even with casey

whereas for casey, this isn't a game. casey really enjoyed valentino being nice to him and is ever so sensitive towards valentino pulling back. casey thinks valentino isn't giving him the credit he is owed and escalates his rhetoric in response. casey puts valentino's name on his championship winning shirt and then complains valentino didn't hold his hand. poor casey... it'd all be easier if he just didn't care, but that's the one thing he could never quite manage

[sunnynwanda]

Black hole: The revelations

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

"So, why the hell were we getting married?" Hero questions, leaning back on the bright green bench to look nonchalant. Villain sits next to them, rubbing a finger over their furrowed eyebrows. They've ended up on this bench after the coffee shop at least three times. Hero glances at them in expectation of an answer.

"Because that's what is supposed to happen," Villain confesses with a deep sigh. Their mind is running a mile an hour, trying to figure out what went wrong to leave Hero with the wounds and memories of their wedding day. "But, every time we do, you die by the end of the day."

"You were the one that stabbed me," Hero counters, gaze fixed on Villain's profile against the morning sky. They can't help the way their eyes are drawn to their archnemesis every damn time they cross paths, be it in battle or civilian life. So goddamn beautiful.

They should have figured this out sooner, Hero thinks. They should have started dating sooner.

"To try and get you out before it happens again," Villain's voice reaches them through the haze of their thoughts, their face still averted from Hero, as if it pains them to talk about it. Pretty sure that's exactly what it does.

Hero considers the situation for a moment before shifting to sit sideways on the bench, folding their foot under them. "Why does it seem like no one remembers anything?"

"Because they don't," Villain's hand comes to rest on their folded knee without a second of thought. Hero doesn't comment on it for now.

"Why?" They tilt their head, watching Villain intently. They figure it must have been a tad too intense when Villain turns to face them at last.

"Because it did not yet happen in this version of reality." If that statement was supposed to clarify anything for Hero, it did not. If anything, it got them even more confused. Villain's powers never made proper sense to them.

"What are you talking about?" They inquire, busying their hands with the hem of Villain's shirt. The soft fabric feels familiar to the touch.

"We got together eight months before our wedding," Villain explains, eyes locked to Hero's fingers twisting their favourite shirt. They never liked it that much until Hero commented how it brought out their eyes. They wore it for each one of their first dates ever since. "Today."

A gasp is all that leaves Hero's parted lips, so Villain continues. "This was our first date because you stumbled into me and demanded I get you a coffee, and I did. We started talking after that and spent the entire afternoon together. It picked up from there."

"Like today?" Hero looks up at them through their lashes, and Villain knows they won't find their voice, so they nod instead, unnerved and exhaling shakily. "But I only came because when I woke up, I found a cut between my ribs and a ring on my finger. That dream felt eerily real, so I decided to confront you and see if it's your doing."

"That's the issue. I come back to this day to try and track what I need to change to ensure you stay with me. It was supposed to only be me remembering all of it." They pause, taking a deep breath to slow their racing mind. "Come to think of it, I've been so caught up in trying to find a solution to keep you alive I never asked why you always come in the first place."

Hero has no idea. They won't admit feeling the need to see Villain was an everyday thing - way before their relationship happened. Or is set to happen, to be precise.

"How long?" Noting the confused expression on Villain's face, they elaborate. "How long has this been going on?"

"Too long for my own liking," Villain rakes a hand through their messy strands, the wind not helping the disaster that was their hair. Hero has to stop themself from reaching out for a touch.

"Vil, were all of my dreams your attempts at fixing it?" They lean back, and Villain wraps an arm around their calves, bringing their legs onto their lap. Hero is stunned at how natural physical contact with them feels.

"Yes," they choke out, their jaw tight with pent-up emotion. They don't know if they can handle Hero remembering any or each of those times.

"Twelve times?" Villain almost jolts at the sharpness in their voice. Hero can feel it scratching the back of their throat like shreds of glass. "You've lived those eight months twelve times?!"

"Look, believe it or not, I love you," Villain meets their eyes, love, pain and despair equally present in their gaze. Hero watches something else flash to life in the depths of their soul, burning bright as they take hold of Hero's face with calloused fingers. "I'll do whatever it takes to keep you alive. Right now, something has changed."

"Why?" They don't dare to move away, struggling to swallow when Villain's thumb rubs soft circles against their cheek.

"I don't know," their voice is barely audible as they speak, entranced by the proximity. "When I reset the time, I'm the only one keeping my memories and wounds. You never remembered anything nor had any injuries."

"Or this?" Hero brings their hand up to their faces, pointing at the wedding band. Villain's eyes widen slightly, despite seeing it previously in the coffee shop. "Yeah, I figured it was off. Does this mean we're onto something?"

"Might be," Villain sighs, catching their wrist and laying a gentle kiss on their knuckles. "I hope so."

Hero intertwines their fingers, offering Villain a small smile as they battle their tears. They cannot even begin to imagine what living all those months must have felt like - knowing what they were leading to, grappling to find a solution. To no avail. Time and time again. "We'll find a way out."

"I've watched you die twelve times," their throat clamps up, threatening to spill years' worth of tears, but they squeeze their eyes shut, willing the storm within to calm. Their voice breaks nonetheless. "I don't know if I can handle another one."

"Hey, we're in this together now," Hero ensures, tilting their chin up with their free hand, the other still holding Villain's tight. "And we have eight months to figure it out. That's plenty of time."

"It's not as long as you'd think," Villain's smile is soft and sad as they draw Hero closer and hug their head against their chest. Hero can hear their heart racing, the pattern torn and uneven when Villain litters kisses onto their hair. "Not when it's all you get with your love."

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

Masterlist

A/N: I didn't intend to do another part for this one initially, but I might just be forced to because they feel too alive in my head. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this and thank you for reading! xo Sunny

Taglist: @marvellousdaisy @alltimelowing @lateuplight @surplus-of-sarcasm @betwist @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall @enemies-to-idiots-to-lovers @miaowmelodie @thatonerandomauthor @hhabaddon @burningoutlikeicarus @daemonvatis @weepingcowboywolfbat @thelazywitchphotographer @kaiwewi @soul-of-a-local-bard @pigeonwhumps @aflyingsheepnamedrose  @thatneptune @ohwellthatslifesstuff @worldsfromhoney @thiefofthecrowns @crow-with-a-typewriter @qualityrabbitsoup @stargeode @villain-life @villainsblood @whumpifi @glassthedumbass @silviathebard @misskowe @ayeshaturnedtoashes4444

[kokichiapologist]

Ok, so I'm almost at the end trial 1 of Danganronpa v3. These are my likes and dislikes so far, without playing the other games

Likes:

K1-B0: I love this man so much he is the most adorable character I've ever seen, and if he dies I will die alongside him. (👍)

Kokichi tbh once he asked K1-B0 if robots had dicks I knew he would be the character that reminds me of myself, therfore one of my favourites. (I hate him)

Kiibouma: they talked like once and I just said, 'you know what, this is my life now' now my gallery is full of kiibouma pics. (This may have been my fault)

Irumatsu: whenever I saw the scene that had Kaede on her knees for Miu, I started shipping it, as a joke, but guys, I don't think it's a joke anymore.

Monokubs (not the pink one), my favourites the red one, Idk maybe it's his personality but I really enjoy their presence, but my sibling whose also playing with me fucking hates them, they've played more of the game then me so maybe that's why, but nevertheless my heart stays with them.

Ryoma, idk why I like him so much, but he's just a chill guy, and I approve of this chill guy.

Hoshimami, I seem to be the only person who ships this, I've looked everywhere but I can't find a single person, honestly tho I saw Rantaro telling Ryoma that his life has meaning and just started shipping them. (I don't even know if this is a joke anymore)

Gonta, this is my sweet innocent boi, and comfort character, so if he dies I will cry and start hating the character who does it.

Monokuma, this dude so so cool, I love his colour sceme, his personality, just him overall as a person, and I would lay down my life to defend this man or thing, or whatever he is

Shuichi's backstory, only his backstory, I find his backstory really appealing as it describes how he doesn't want to let another person go to jail if what their doing is morally right but illegal I wished they used some of this creativity for Shuichi's personality, as I find him a bland character, but I hope he gets better. (I don't condone this line of thought as I love him and what is him on about him being bland)

Tenmiko, THEIR SO ADORABLE I JUST WANT TO SQUEEZE THEM AND NEVER LET GO, that's enough said. (Also may have been my fault)

Himiko, I find her so adorable I want to squeeze this adorable mage, I also really like the nyeh thing she does it's so adorable, and she's a mage not a magician

Gonta having been raised by wolves, I just find that concept so cool, and most of the time I like characters with those concepts, like Inosuke from Demon Slayer. (Can't wait to show him the free time events)

Saimatsu, I enjoy the friendship they have and as it develops I can almost feel them falling for each other before having to go through the class trial, which destroyed me emotionally.

Dislikes:

Angie, I know from certain sources that Angie ends up starting a culture and manipulates K1-B0 and Gonta, and since I loves my sweet boiz I dislike this. (The certain source is me, the sibling in question)

Miu, THIS BITCH, I really dislike her, I hate her face, her voice (OP Note: No offence to the VA), her personality, the way she talks, her only redeeming quality is that she is the only one that swears. (I don't know why he is like this)

Korekiyo, my sibling has had a hyperfixation of Korekiyo ever since they started watching Danganronpa, so unfortunately I know every thing about him, including his sister, that mainly sparked my dislike for him but my dude didn't deserve that. (I am not sorry)

Pink monokub, this bitch, ONLY ONE OF US CAN CALL MONOKUMA DADDY, jokes aside I really found that wierd and I also just kinda hate how that the pink one is obviously the girl one, and a daddy's girl.

The rest of the Miu plot line in chapter 1, I dislike miu, enough said, also everything went downhill after the begging scene. (I don't agree with this)

Oumami, just because Kokichi called Rantaro darling is not an excuse to ship them. This is deprived from my love of Kiibouma. (Just wait until he find out about his room in chapter 6)

Tenko being sexist, being a guy this angered me so much as I like her character, kinda, and himiko likes her, but the fact that she just hates men, Ha lesbian, and she just acts sexist makes me want to punch her. (This is so sad to hear honestly)

Yonmeno, I don't understand why people ship Angie and Himiko, I understand Angie, Tenko and Himiko, maybe even Angie and Tenko, but just Himiko and Angie? (What is he on about, Angie and Tenko? Tenko literally hates Angie)

THE FUCKING MONITORS!!! (For context, I enjoy looking at every detail and item that I am able to click on, this is no different in danganronpa, however anytime there is a monitor I always click on it and as he is doing in the inner monologue of the protag he had to read out 3 different messages over and over again)

Beta read by (the sibling)

(No spoilers pls It's funnier that way)

[canirove]

Rice, Rice, baby | Chapter 16

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

“Liv, you seriously didn't have to buy them anything for Christmas.”

“I’m their favourite aunty, Kennedy. I had to get them something” I say while watching one of the twins try to eat the wrapping paper from one of the presents. “Besides, thinking about what to get them and then going shopping has been one of the most joyful things I've done lately. Who knew buying kids’ stuff could be therapeutic?” I chuckle.

“How are you?” Kennedy asks me. “Like, truly.”

“I have good days and bad days” I shrug. “But the good days have begun to overcome the bad ones.” 

And that started just a couple of weeks after what happened between me and Declan in my car. Because what did he do? Make it Instagram official that he and the singer were dating. And what did I do? Have the biggest breakdown known to history.

When Alex showed me their joint post during our lunch break (kind of lame to announce it like that, but who am I to judge), I felt as if the hole in my chest had started to grow at lightning speed, swallowing me completely. I wanted to cry, to scream, to hit something. And I did all that at Tottenham's gym, where I ran to hide myself, and where Micky found me.

“Liv, what are you doing?”

“Looking for something I can hit!” I yell.

“Why?”

“Do you seriously have to ask why?” I laugh.

“Declan…”

“Yes. Him” I say, kicking a yoga mat and making the ones standing next to it fall.

“If you want to hit something, why don't you try this?” Micky says. “It's less harmful, gets the job done, and they won't fire you for destroying the gym.”

“What?” I say, turning around.

“This” he says, holding some boxing gloves. “It has helped me in the past and I think it can help you too.”

That first day all I did was cry and scream while he held the punching bag, letting all my anger go. But when I woke up the next day, my arms feeling so sore I could barely move them, I noticed that the hole was a tiny bit smaller. So I started to meet with Micky in the gym when we both were free, him teaching me how to properly box while I felt like every punch was closing the hole a bit more. 

“I'm glad to hear that” Kennedy says. “But you aren't looking that good.”

“Uh?”

“We have matching bags under our eyes, Liv. And last time I checked, you didn't have three children that drove you crazy” she chuckles. “Are you sleeping well?”

“I mean… I'm sleeping a lot more than usual, even taking naps throughout the day. But I still feel tired, it's a weird feeling.”

“Not so weird. I felt like that when… Nah, it can't be.”

“What can't be?”

“I felt like that before I knew I was pregnant with Leo. But it doesn't make any sense because you haven't been with anyone since before the summer, have you?”

“Yeah, that doesn't make any sense” I reply, not really answering her question. “It probably is just stress from these days.” 

Too much work, then the training with Micky after not working out for ages, the fact that I'm still emotionally healing, that I'm having to spend Christmas with Alex and his family when things keep being weird between us… That has to be it. 

“You could always ask one of the team's doctors to run some tests if that makes you feel better.”

“Nah, there is no need. I'm fine” I smile. “Do you want me to help you with bath time and putting them to bed?”

“Yeah, sure. You take care of Leo, I'll take care of the twins” Kennedy says. But there is something in the way she's looking at me, that tells me that she won't forget so easily about the conversation we just had.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“Liv, wait” Madders says behind me.

“Hey” I reply, turning around. “Doctor Smith?” 

“Hello” he smiles. 

“Great, you know each other.”

“Of course we do, Madders. He works with my dad, remember?”

“Oh, yes. Silly me” he chuckles. “Anyway, he has something to tell you.”

“Me?”

“Your dad and James have mentioned that you've been going through a rough patch and they are worried it may have affected your physical health. That's why they've asked me if I could run some tests and make sure everything is fine.”

Kennedy. She told Madders, of course she did! This is what her look from yesterday meant!

“That's very kind of you, but there is no need.”

“C'mon, Liv. It'll be just a blood test and maybe a peepee one, right?”

“Peepee?” I laugh.

“You know that's how Leo says it and now I do it too without thinking” he shrugs. “But that'll be it, won't it, doctor?”

“Just the basics” he says.

“I'm fine, James. Maybe a bit stressed, but fine” I insist. “It'll pass after the holidays, you'll see.”

“But what if it doesn't?”

“Then I'll say yes to those tests.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, I promise” I sigh. “Now can I please go home? My mum wants me to help her clean around the house, we are hosting this year.”

“Ok, fine. But we have Doctor Smith as our witness. If after Christmas you are feeling like shit…”

“He can run those tests.”

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“You didn't have to wait with me, Madders.”

“What kind of older brother would I be if I left you alone?”

“The not annoying one?”

“Meh, meh, meh” he replies, sticking out his tongue.

I had had to do it. I had had to get the tests done. And why? Because during Christmas things hadn't improved. 

I felt sick most mornings, and by dinner time I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. All I wanted to do was to lay down in my bed while watching period dramas and wish I got to dress like a princess. Oh, and speaking of periods… Mine was nowhere to be found. Which has only made the tiny voice that has been in my head since Kennedy told me she had felt this tired when she was pregnant, get louder and louder.

But me having all these symptoms could be just stress. I googled it and it matches. So it has to be that, not that Declan had better aim than all the strikers in the Premier League together after just one time not using any kind of protection. 

“Isn't it taking them too long? He said he'll have the results by the end of the day.”

“Maybe they were busy with other stuff” Madders says, resting his hand on my leg and stopping it from moving like crazy. 

“Or maybe there is something wrong with me.”

“Liv, no. Don't you dare going there.”

“Then why hasn't he called us yet? Why…” 

“Oh, there you are” Doctor Smith says, opening the door of his office. “Sorry for making you wait, but the system went down and it took it a while to recover and allow us to log in.”

“See?” Madders whispers.

“Please come in, Olivia. You can wait here, James.”

“Can't he come with me?” I ask.

“I would prefer to talk with you in private” the doctor says. That's it. There is something wrong with me, I'm dying. Or worse. My suspicions are right. “But if it makes you feel more comfortable…”

“It does. Thank you” I say, holding Madders' arm as if my life depended on it. Which can very well be the case. 

“Ok, so” Doctor Smith says once we are sitting down in his office. “All the tests came back perfect, but…”

“But?” I ask, grabbing Madders hand and squeezing it so hard I fear I may break it.

“Olivia… You are pregnant.”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for distancing myself from my partner?

I, (17NB) and my partner (17NB) had a rough year. Thier family is super religious, and so is the place we live in, and we've had many fears about being outed. My family is less religious and I mostly raise myself so admittedly he's a lot more paranoid, and rightfully so I'd say. But ever since we've started dating I've had to ask them multiple times to improve thier communication.

To start off, I wish they were upfront, or atleast more firm about us breaking up, atleast in the first year. That wouldve solved a lot of heartbreak if they didn't want to be with me.

They dodged the question of physical intimacy of literally anything more than holding hands or cuddling multiple times, and yet mentioned they were ace offhandedly to a friend instead of giving me a straight answer (which I wouldve been fine with, I just wish they told me.) They tend to get angry quite easily and resort to snappish/ short answers, and, especially since them having a conversation with thier mom questioning thier sexuality, tend to abhor the smallest inkling of physical contact or sign that we're together, even if we're around friends who know, or alone.

After the conversation with thier mom, they asked to break up, but i basically pleaded for another chance and they agreed. I know it's my own fault at some point for beating a dead horse, but I recently had a conversation that kind of snapped the rose-tinted glasses right off.

We were discussing our futures, and there's a somber agreement neither of us will see each other again after school. Thats not what I'm upset about. They described having kids in a hetero marriage and joking to thier kids about the "wild" stuff they got up to in highschool like experimenting in a queer relationship, basically saying our entire 3 years of dating was a fluke or joke or experiment.

I realised this was the straw that broke the camel's back, they didn't really initiate or seem as eager as me about the sparse times we could go out alone together, they gave me a half finished craft I had to sew myself while I gave a painting for valentine's day, and various examples of bad communication. They're a good friend, I'm not so sure about partner.

So, I'm kinda trying to stop this year. I stopped frantically calling in school and rearranging lessons to be with them, I didnt spam text or think about making any gifts so far, I asked to have a..spicy experience with a friend or two (that my partner agreed with me doing). In my head I guess I told myself that we might call ourselves partners but the word just lost its meaning for us both.

So far, it's okay. It hurts, because it seems more like we're just friends instead of dating, but I want to focus on myself and my studies to get out of our really conservative area. Still, I feel guilty and a little resentful. I know I should've just accepted breaking up, but we're kinda codependant. They and I both know we can't be without each other.

They love me so much, I know that. They've done so so much for me and dragged me out of a horrible place pretty much single-handedly, they're just not great at communicating or emotional maturity. Also, they seem to think queer people go to hell in some self-imposed notion of religious guilt, and when I express resentment towards religions that push homophobia on thier followers they seem weirdly defensive of it.

For context, I have BPD (my partner has, for a long time being my 'favourite person') and what I'm reluctant to call "severe" trauma but it's been described as that. I'm genuinly curious to know if this is a result of some upbringing-induced overreaction or if its okay to just kinda give up on my own relationship. Yes, I'm aware that the best thing would be to break up but I dont think I could ever leave them, for some stupid reason.

What are these acronyms?

[starrulet]

My Experience with P5R

So, I went into this game with Zero Knowledge™ of what it held. I only bought it, because I knew you got to play as a phantom thief, everyone loves Joker and everyone had at one point called it the Perfect Game™ (oh, and it was on sale).

First Playthrough

Start up game. Absolute banger of a first hour. Everything is on point, this truly is the Perfect Game™ when it comes to graphical interface. Also, hands down best intro segment I have ever played. Immediately 100% invested in the game.

I write my name. I'm too lazy to look up something authentically Japanese online, so I name him KURO KNIGHT. I do not realize that small caps were available and this does haunt me for the next 100+ hours.

I discover the ability to "befriend" shadows. I attempt to befriend every shadow I meet.

Igor tells me to kill two of my personas. I am heartbroken and horrified by their execution. I absolutely hate the function and vow to never use it.

(Arsène is never sacrificed. At the time, I did not know this is uncommon for the first playthrough).

I max out the amount of personas I can currently have. I am heartbroken. I want to befriend all the shadows, but the game won't let me.

I am introduced to social stats. I make the wild assumption that these will passively effect the story for good/bad endings, as well as chances of success in Palaces (e.g. charm will increase likelihood of befriending a shadow, knowledge improves Third Eye, etc.), instead of being a "you must have stat 4 to pass to the next story segment" role. I immediately start investing hard on maxing my stats.

I do not know how to check Confidant Availability on the map. I only go to meet confidants if they've texted me.

(As you can imagine, this will royally screw me over later)

A teacher smacks me in the head with a piece of chalk. I'm told if I improve my proficiency, I can dodge it. Guess which social stat I start heavily investing in.

I am introduced to Maruki. I am told I have until November to max my relationship with him. He is immediately given priority over all other Confidants. Keep in mind, I only meet confidants if they text me.

I meet Kasumi. I'm not that interested in her, until I realize she only has a 5-star confidant bond. I decide to max her out, because that will be easy to reach.

I reluctantly start executing personas. Arsène is never executed, even though he's becoming so weak, I can no longer use him in fights.

While on the main menu, I notice Joker's shoes for the first time. And then I check and yes. Joker has the worst shoes in existence. I hate them. Everything about his phantom thief outfit is on point, except for those monstrosities.

I go ballistic over no one asking why "Pleasant Boy" heard their conversation about pancakes. I am angry. Enraged. I want answers, but the characters don't seem to catch onto the pancakes. I am deeply upset.

This is when I start questioning the intelligence and competence of the Phantom Thieves. It will effect how I perceive them later on.

I officially meet Akechi. I instantly take a strong liking to him, because he is the absolute WORST person to befriend as a phantom thief. The pancake thing makes me also super suspicious of him, further adding to him being a BAD person to befriend.

Akechi gives me the Sleuthing Instinct Skill. Akechi is instantly my favourite Confidant and I am determined to unlock the rest of the skills on his Confidant route.

A teacher throws chalk at me. I dodge. The whole class is amazed. I'm smug about it.

I meet "Becky". I die of second-hand embarrassment.

Why can I not gift Morgana sushi when I want to? Let me feed my cat sushi.

Every new palace, the Phantom Thieves are like "No! They don't have a persona, they can't help!" and "Leave it to us experienced pro phantom thieves B) ", only to end up relying on the formally non-persona user. I really don't feel like they're competent, since they suck at protecting civilians so much, that the civilian has to awaken a persona to save everyone or they'll all die.

I finally have enough guts to call up "Becky". When she arrives, the second-hand embarrassment is so strong, I exit the game without saving and have to replay the last two in-game weeks.

I realize that Yusuke, Makoto and Futaba are not listed as my Confidants. I panic and despair. I have failed my friends.

(I am unaware that minimal confidant bond does not mean we are not in-game friends and that not maxing out a Confidant Bond does not have too much impact on the story...)

The first time I ram into a shadow with the van, I burst into laughter. It was entirely unexpected.

I befriend Chihaya. I can't help but notice how much of a Meet-Cute this is and decide that I will pursue a relationship with her.

In Hawaii, I spend the day with Mishima and Ryuji. I am unaware that this is because I failed to develop higher bonds with other Confidants.

I get my first part-time jobs to complete Mementos quests. I wonder why anyone would bother with jobs, since you can get more money in Mementos than at work.

It starts occurring to me, that maybe I'm not supposed to blast through palaces in one run. There are benefits to multiple visits. I continue to complete palaces in one run.

I get stuck on my second boss - Haru's dad. Even grinding in Mementos does not save the day. I look up advice online.

I go out of my way to meet Hifumi. I cry. I want to max out her bond, she's instantly proven herself so useful.

I defeat the boss by the skin of my teeth. I never want to face that boss again.

Akechi officially joins the team. I am ecstatic, but I am dreading it. I love him, but I still have that pancake thing in my head and I am fully aware that the rest of the Phantom Thieves do not like him. AT ALL. Which can only mean the narrative has labelled him a bad guy (otherwise they would have quickly warmed up to him, like they did with Haru), which means he is only temporarily on the team, which means he will do something nefarious because the narrative said he must. Also, he is conspicuously the only one wearing white as a main colour. So. Further fuel for the "not part of the group!!!" fire. I am deeply upset by this. I still love him, even though I know I will have to soon accept his role in the narrative, whatever that may be.

A teacher throws chalk at me. I'm one step away from maxing out proficiency. It smacks into my face. The cold war wasn't over after all. The teacher has improved his aim.

I try to start a Confidant bond with Haru. She snaps at me and I'm so terrified by the reaction from the otherwise sweet and polite girl, I never attempt to talk to her again.

"I hate you." Akechi, as your only friend, please go see a therapist.

It's November and I haven't maxed out my relationship with Maruki. I am not getting opportunities to do so via text. I despair, because Maruki has grown to be a favourite of mine.

Maruki wants to bid me personally farewell. My Confidant Bond with him maxes out during our tearful goodbyes. I whoop and cheer that I got to the end of his Confidant route, oblivious to what this means.

Akechi says we should leave stealing the treasure to the last second. The team instantly agrees. I get mad, because when I try to do that, the team nags at me and complains that we should really do this ASAP, but when Akechi suggests it, it's fine-

The police raid Sae's palace and I assume they're cognitions from the nearby cognitive police station, not real police. From that, I deduce that the interrogation scene is taking place in the Metaverse and not the real world.

Yeah. I wasn't wrong, but I wasn't right either.

Endgame spoilers under the cut.

Endgame

The game keeps telling me to think carefully about my choices. I become paranoid. I am in interrogation and I become confused.

I am so confused by the game, I start thinking that maybe my instincts are wrong, and I end up ratting out my friends while being interrogated.

Sensing this was the Wrong Option, I exit the game and reload the last save file without finding out if it really was the wrong option.

I was right. It was the Wrong Option, since I am now watching the Right Option unfold. I am frustrated, because if the game hadn't been so insistent I "think carefully" and "consider my actions seriously", I would have instinctively not named my allies. BUT because it was nagging me, I thought if I went with the obvious option, I'd end up with the bad ending.

I'm an overthinker, ok.

Akechi comes to kill me. He looks utterly unhinged, to the point it crosses over into hilarity.

(Akechi gets one(1) plus point for looking incredible while killing the policeman. Like, that was insanely slick. Several thousand minus points for killing Joker though. And then nudging his head to check if he's dead, like Akechi, you shot him through the head what do you expect-)

It turns out, the Phantom Thieves did know about the pancake thing. But I'm 60+ hours into the game at this point and I do not have the mental capacity to retcon that much time to fit this reveal into a cohesive story. As such, despite making sense and the game setting up for this, my brain does not completely accept this plot reveal.

In other words, I would have strongly preferred it if we continued having 100% of the protagonists' perspective, instead of the 90% we ended up having, to keep the 10% (knowledge that Akechi will betray them, and the plan to fool Akechi) secret.

Like, no. We didn't need that to be a "plot twist". It was obvious from the start. Just admit it upfront next time.

I also don't buy into the Phantom Thieves being smart enough to concoct such a plan, because they've been making things up as they go along since Day 1 and have been heavily reliant on picking up new team members to survive Palaces and defeat Bosses. As said. By not addressing the pancake thing, my opinion of them being competent phantom thieves was shattered. I can't unsee their shortcomings, even if the pancake thing wasn't a shortcoming after all.

A part of me feels icky, because I know my first choice had been the bad ending. It now feels like the bad ending was the true ending, and I've cheated my way out of it, so the good ending that I'm approaching does not feel earned. The feeling hangs over me for a while.

Even though KURO is not dead, his absence in day-to-day life is shocking. It leaves a really big impact and a sense of dread.

I like KURO's incognito civilian clothes until I realize he's got nothing on under the grey hoodie. Child. Put some layers on. It's winter. What the heck, are you trying to die of hypothermia or something.

I miss Akechi. Not because I actually miss him, I miss what he contributed to the group: Getting the others to get all the way off my back about leaving the heist to the last minute.

"No guys, we can't go to Shido's palace until I've made enough coffee and curry! Yes, I'm serious!!!"

The Phantom Thieves are turned into mice. This is one of the best things to happen in-game.

Akechi has a psychotic breakdown in the engine room. I repeat to myself that this really could have been avoided if Akechi had just gone to a therapist.

Imagine my shock when I defeat Shido, but the game doesn't end. Staggering.

Igor orders Caroline and Justine to kill me. I panic, wondering if this was because I failed to max out my bonds with the Phantom Thieves and I am approaching a bad ending after all. Then I wonder if maybe this could be avoided if Caroline and Justine had a higher Confidant bond with me and I regret that it's still at an abysmal level 1.

It turns out that having level 1 doesn't stop the girls from apparently liking me. They cannot of their own free will kill me. I'm glad that it doesn't matter that I only have a level 1 bond with them, but this still feels jarring. My mind still equates bonds to levels of friendship, meaning we're still barely acquaintances at best. Plot armour for Joker has kicked in hard.

I make the wrong assumption that maxing out bonds has no impact on the overall story.

I am surprised that Morgana is not - in fact - human. At some point I had convinced myself he was a teen persona user, stuck in a coma. Or that he is the persona of a persona user, sent loose to help his persona user wake up again. I don't know when I developed that theory, but it's so strong that the truth throws me.

Unlike the pancake twist, I accept this "twist" without issue.

Over the course of the game, I have been strengthening Arsène like crazy. He is my strongest persona and has inherited many powerful abilities from the persona sacrificed for him.

I head into the final battle with Arsène equipped. It's satisfying to kinda defeat the final boss with him.

There's something kinda depressing about the cutscenes in the final boss battle. Almost like my confidants are... absent...

I am overjoyed when Akechi is confirmed to have survived, as he turns himself over to the police. I assume this is the result of maxing out my bond with him.

I love Morgana's cat portrait. No, I am not biased because he's a cat.

I assume the game will end. Then KURO wakes up in the counselling room. The game is not over yet.

Third Semester

Because I happened to max out my bonds with Akechi, Kasumi and Maruki, I get the third semester story part.

I am unaware of how lucky I am, considering I didn't max out any other bonds by December (outside of the automated bonds of Igor, Sae and Morgana).

I make use of the extra costumes the game has given me for the first time. I pretend there's an in-story reason: The alteration in the universe has also affected how they appear as phantom thieves. KURO is now running around in his starlight clothes, Akechi in the dance costume and Kasumi I'm never quite able to settle on. Why those particular clothes? I am unable to come up with a theory, beyond reality alteration.

I am thrilled that the game addressed Akechi's unhinged nature by having Kasumi question it, and didn't just act like nothing had happened.

I am delighted that, in Morgana and Futaba's absence, Akechi is my navigator. I have not enjoyed myself that much in a long time. He's terrible and that's what makes him perfect.

To be honest, it's in the third semester where Akechi is elevated to absolute favourite character in Persona 5. Prior to that, he was liked, but not favoured.

I am horrified that Maruki is the new bad guy. I am even more horrified by what they did to his hair.

I am glad that "Please see a therapist" is not something I can tell Akechi during the first and second semester, because - after what has happened to Maruki - Akechi would never let me live this down.

To be fair, Akechi would also accuse me of being a kleptomaniac, considering how I've picked every palace clean so far.

Genuinely shocked by the Sumire reveal.

Sumire apologizes for trying to kill KURO. I wish KURO had told her it's fine, because Akechi, his currently only other friend, also tried to kill him.

I spend third semester trying to max out my bonds with the Phantom Thieves and any other Confidants I haven't maxed yet.

I befriend Haru, but I never get passed level one with her.

I manage to get to level 9 with Chihaya. We become a couple. I assume.

I succeed in maxing out Takemi and Mishima's confidant bonds, but no one else.

I max out the Baton Pass with all Phantom Thieves (including Akechi and Sumire). I do this just because it's cool to have. I'm not thinking strategically.

During this semester I go to play billiards for the first time.

Because I'm playing billiards for the first time, KURO asks "What's a cue stick?" Meanwhile, Akechi - with whom KURO has played billiards several times, who KURO has even beaten at billiards - is just standing in the background. I pretend Akechi is exasperated.

I had already suspected it when it's revealed that Akechi is a cognition-human of the new reality. I am not surprised, since despite my love for Akechi, it feels like some of his nuance is gone as of the third semester. Him being a cognition built from people's perception of him (with heaviest influences being directly from KURO and the Phantom Thieves) explains that.

"This isn't trivial!" Mmh. Some grade-A angst right there, I love it.

Of course I choose to defeat Maruki. I may love Akechi, but not so much that I'd let everyone on the planet be brainwashed into someone's perception of true happiness. There's a difference between living and being alive. And also, Akechi doesn't want to live in this reality either, so....

I really, really hate Maruki's metaverse look. Like, at first, you think, well, a bit weird, but tolerable. Then you get glimpses of what's underneath the poncho and oh... oh no...

I am glad to have maxed out the Baton Pass with everyone, because this is the only reason I am able to beat Maruki.

Much like with all bosses from Okumura onwards, I win by the skin of my teeth. Unlike other bosses though, I get max HP and SP after completing a phase. I appreciate this, because otherwise I would have lost (most Phantom Thieves are in the low 80s, high 70s range).

I can't believe I end up in a fistfight with Maruki. They're not even attempting to dodge each other. It's like I'm watching an 18th century boxing match.

The Ending

It's Valentine's day. Chihaya doesn't give me anything. I am disgusted.

I'm told to say goodbye to all my friends. I exit and can only bid farewell to Sae, Takemi and Mishima. I am distraught.

Even though the cutscene has all the Phantom Thieves bidding me goodbye, I don't buy it. I couldn't bid them farewell on my last day, so this doesn't feel earned or real.

I realize I couldn't bid farewell because I didn't max out their bonds. So maxing out the bonds does have an affect on the story, just not one I could have predicted. It leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

Maruki is a taxi driver. Dude. You have a university degree. You have a doctor title. Is this really all you could come up with?!

The game ends, I get the extra cutscene with Akechi and KURO seeing himself as Joker in the reflection. I interpret this as 1: Akechi is alive in some shape or form (with how and why being up in the air), and 2: the Metaverse cannot be destroyed, but the Phantom Thieves actions have lead to it being purged and cleaned. Hopefully, it will be healthier this time.

First Playthrough took me 110 hours.

NewGame+

I start the game so I can say goodbye to my friends. Yes. I am so mad that I couldn't say goodbye to Ryuji (and tbh, specifically Ryuji), I am replaying the entire game.

For real, if I'd been able to bid farewell to Ryuji in the first playthrough, I wouldn't have bothered with NewGame+.

And yes I've only mentioned Ryuji like a handful of times, but that's because I didn't really need to. Everyone loves him. It's a given.

I set the game to safety mode, because I just want the story.

This time I put a bit more effort into Joker's civilian name. I've grown attached to Kuro, even though I'm fairly certain that's not a name in Japan. In NewGame+ his name is Kuro Kichihei.

I enter my first battle in the Kamoshida's palace. I am frustrated that my stats are so low.

I realize I can equip end-game gear.

I'm crying, the shadows stand no chance.

I am too powerful. I fail to befriend shadows. I am forced to execute Arsène. This hurts.

I see the cutscene for executing Arsène for the first time. The Best Boy was with me to the very end in the first playthrough. It hurts to see him leave so soon in another timeline.

"It's no use! They're too powerful!!" Morgana cries. We have taken 2 HP damage.

I kinda wish I had set the game to easy mode, because I have a strong desire to know if this would be just as easy in normal mode.

I am determined to max out all bonds I form. While reading an online guide, I learn about checking Confidants Availability on the map. I feel like an idiot. I knew the blue rectangles meant a confidant was there, I didn't know they may offer up more information.

I discover there is a Confidant I have never even met in the First Playthrough. I go out of my way to befriend him. It's Yoshida.

Befriending him is... kinda stalker-y. Because I first find out where he frequents, get a job there to talk to him, and then I'm able to open up the confidant route. Like. I- I stalked him. So I could befriend him. No matter how you slice it, it's creepy.

I am in Madarame's boss battle. I am using personas at levels way higher than me, than the palace. I throw fire at all Madarames, the fire Madarames reflect it back at me. I am insta-killed. It's the only time I've died in the second playthrough.

I'm befriending and levelling up all previous Confidants, even though I know some of their skills carried over to NewGame+. I plan on befriending Chihaya again too, even though I'm going to pursue Makoto this time.

I do not open up the route with Chihaya.

I do open up Kawakami's route. I emotionally distance myself from the game to do so.

I discover I really love Kawakami and relate to her. It's unfortunate that the guy helping her is a minor and her student.

I spend a day hanging out with Ryuji. He mentions that his favourite characters are the rival characters. Um. Ryuji. Are you sure about that. Are you sure about that-

I open up Haru's route. She doesn't snap at me when I talk with her. I'm relieved.

As I finish Makoto's route, I suddenly wish I hadn't started a relationship with her. Because as she's pouring her heart out, this feels like she needed a friend, not a boyfriend. It's too late now though.

Meanwhile, I'm in Haru's early stages and I am displeased by the fact that she's still with her fiancé. My sympathy is not very high.

I finally understand why the Phantom Thieves kept asking me how I felt about the plan for Sae's palace. They weren't worried about the palace, or working with Akechi, they were worried about Akechi freaking murdering me.

Why is it an option to date Futaba if Sojiro is against it? Don't go against your dad's wishes, man.

Because I am weak, when Akechi sends me a text, asking me to hang out two days before he will murder me, I agree. Even though there are other Confidants whose bonds are ready to level up. Even though I've already maxed out my relationship with him. Even though it only unlocks a bless skill he will not have in the third semester. Akechi is still the favourite and does, in fact, get special treatment as a result.

As the Phantom Thieves re-explain how they suspected and tricked Akechi, I am able to better accept it and see how it fits into the story, partly because it's taken me 30 hours to get to this point, instead of 60.

I may accept the twist better, but the distaste remains and so I'm still not wholly happy with it. Maybe it's favouritism though. No. Who am I kidding. At this point, it's definitely favouritism. It's rarely strong enough to break the narrative though, so. Idk what you did Akechi, but you did it right.

I learn that if you have high bonds with non-PT Confidants prior to having to pretend to be dead, they will all reach out to you, to know that you're still alive. This made me very happy. And I did think it was strange in the first playthrough that no one outside the Phantom Thieves seemed all that bothered that I was dead.

There is substantial fear that I won't max out all my bonds before the end of the game.

I am particularly terrified that I will fail to max-out Haru and Shinya.

NewGame+ : Endgame

I enter Shido's palace. For the first time, I am no longer killing enemies with guns and attacks alone. Still wiping the floor with them though.

Haru seems to laugh at all my jokes. I wonder why Haru, Kuro and Akechi are not a more common trio in the fandom. You just know Kuro will tell a terrible joke, which Akechi will reasonably not find funny, but Haru finds hilarious, bursting into laughter, further exasperating him. I mean, tell me you don't see it. Tell me.

I max out the technical skill in billiards. I wish I could switch to normal, to see what the difference is (considering I never even touched it in the first playthrough).

Turns out I didn't need to worry about Haru. She maxed out within ten days.

At level 9, I'm thinking "Wow. Joker and Haru are such good friends :) " Then I reject her and she runs away. I suddenly feel bad that I'm already dating Makoto. So far, the only other confidant that got sad about rejection was Takemi. And she swallowed it like a champ.

I finally start exploring Shido's palace. I skip dialogue and cutscenes, so when Ann asks me if I remembered the plan, I answered "I forgot, actually...", making her exasperated. I have discovered being dumb is way more fun than being a know-it-all.

I rewatch Akechi's confrontation and once again feel second-hand embarrassment for the boy. This really could have been avoided if you went to therapy like a normal person.

I didn't notice how cool Akechi choosing to side with the Phantom Thieves was during first playthrough. I'm able to appreciate it this time.

Shido demands that Akechi be brought to him. Sorry Shido, unless Akechi somehow managed to drag himself out of the metaverse, you're not finding the body. Assuming he died. If he didn't die, well. Brace yourself, you're in for a shock either way.

Actually, that opens up a can of worms. What does happen to a being of the real world, if they were to die in the metaverse? They're a physical being, surely they can't just stay there? ? ?

I attempt to open up Chihaya's route, even though we're days away from the final boss battle. I forgot that there was a lot of running back and forth to unlock her confidant bond.

In other words, I do not achieve what I set out to do.

I've maxed out all my bonds, prior to the final boss fight. Except with Futuba and Kawakami. I accept my losses and wonder if I have time to max out three confidant bonds in the third semester.

I get a lot of new cutscenes in the boss battle, because I maxed out most of my bonds. Too bad I am not as invested in the story this time and so it's more of an annoyance than an "oh cool, so happy my friends back me :) " moment.

I'm in the boss battle. I defeat the god of control very quickly, it's laughably easy.

It's why I call BS when the plot demands the Phantom Thieves are exhausted and low energy, so that the crowd can overwhelmingly cheer them on.

My Phantom Thieves were still on max health and their SP was still fairly high. We didn't need popularity to mop the floor with the god of control.

From what I gather, Akechi is the absolute first sign of reality manipulation. Everything else follows after Akechi appears. That's weird. I wonder if there may have been other hints I missed, but I don't think so. Wait. Does Kasumi count?

It's the first time I get to spend christmas eve with a gf, instead of Sojiro and Futaba. It's surprisingly sweet and I stop regretting dating Makoto. Idk, I feel Joker and Makoto work well together.

"My sis told me last night [about Akechi]!" Yeah, right Makoto. I know you spent last night with Joker, you totally heard it from your sister and not him.

Tbh, with the way the story works, it seems that Joker and Makoto are in a secret relationship. Which I'm fine with, secret relationships are like. One of my favourite shipping dynamics.

NewGame+ : 3rd Semester

It seems I'm very heavily invested in the third semester, because I don't skip nearly as many cutscenes.

I wonder what it would be like to play P5 and go out of my way to be as hostile as possible to Akechi. Like, avoid him at all costs and always shoot him down. I doubt it makes a difference to the story.

Can you even unlock third semester if you don't max out Akechi?

I change their uniforms again, because I like pretending that third semester also affects how their metaverse selves appear. And the explanation for a more casual look? Maruki wants them to be ordinary teenagers, without the pressure of having to save the world. So their phantom thief clothes are partially affected by that (which does work, since Kuro's starlight clothes look like a more casual version of his phantom thief clothes, etc.)

Akechi: "I think we handled that rather well!" Akechi killed the shadow in one attack. Kasumi and I did nothing, just stood by and watched. Let me repeat that, we didn't do anything. There was no we, Akechi.

Akechi really does just straight-up peace out and let Joker fight Kasumi by himself. And then appears in the background after the battle, like he'd been helping in some shape, way or form.

It's still very funny to see Akechi go full-on villain in his showtime with Joker, while wearing a hat with HERO written on it in big, golden letters.

It stings to lose Akechi as navigator so soon, but because we're all way higher levels than we were in the first playthough (we're steadily approaching 90), the segment where he's navigator is much shorter.

Kinda weird how Akechi is open and even pushes for teamwork this time, when he strongly rejected it in December. :/ Almost like... This might not be the real Akechi...

I finish Kawakami's route. It's sweet. I'm really glad I swallowed my second-hand embarrassment, because this was worth it.

The NewGame+ was worth it, because lemme tell you, those third persona awakenings are hitting me right in the heart. Ryuji almost made me cry.

Yusuke's third awakening is so great, it's easily tied with Ryuji for best third awakening.

Really wish I could tell my friends that considering how I've forgiven Akechi, who not only betrayed me, but actually tried to murder me, I'm pretty sure I can get over them ignoring me for a few days.

I mean, the bar to upset Kuro is pretty freaking high. Akechi can potentially have failed to reach it, depending on how snarky and hostile the player wants to be towards him, but in both of my playthroughs he hasn't.

Hey, has anyone decided to keep Maruki's reality, purely to spite Akechi? Asking for a friend.

I now have a new fear: Failing to max out Futaba in time. I consider it a minor loss though.

I ask Haru to grow moonlight carrots. It's the first time I've asked her to grow anything. I promptly forget about them and never collect them.

Akechi and Ryuji argue while at Maruki's palace. And I have to decide whose side I want to take. As much as I favour Akechi, when we get down to it, I will always side with Ryuji. Also, Akechi getting flummoxed by my behaviour will never not be funny.

I finally befriend Chihaya. With 14 days left before the ultimate final boss battle. But I have nothing else to do in the evenings now, so I might as well try. As exepected, it doesn't get far.

There are nine days left and I have not yet maxed out Sumire or Futaba. The fear of failing is becoming increasingly real and intense.

It's kinda funny. In the First Playthrough, Joker had a supporting role in battle, reviving, healing and using support skills. He also specialized in Bless and Lightning attacks, and switched between personas frequently. In NewGame+ he's become a tank, specialized in Almighty and Curse attacks, and only uses, like, two personas really. It's such a stark contrast, almost like they're different people.

I'm ranking up Futaba and. Oh. Oh no. She has a crush.

What is it with men head-patting women as romantic gestures in Japanese media, that's always been so creepy to me.

Sumire confesses to Joker, which good on her, she's the only one to have done so. But I still wouldn't date her. Feels like a saviour crush, and I'm not into that jazz.

I fail to max out Futaba, but I'm ok with that. Sorry Futaba (and technically Chihaya).

Hey, if Maruki could bring back Okumura and Futaba's mum (and maybe Akechi), why couldn't he bring back the real Kasumi? Pretty sure that would relieve Sumire more than imposing a fake Kasumi personality onto Sumire. Or even switching out Kasumi for Sumire. Like, what's up with that.

Also, do dead people get their desires fulfilled? I imagine not. Which might be why Akechi is dead set on rejecting the reality. He's real enough to behave similar or identically to the real Akechi, and therefore aware enough to see that everyone has their "desires" fulfilled, except his. Unless his wish was to not go to prison, but he could have avoided that by just. Not taking Joker's place.

Or maybe it was that his crimes had never happened? Which kinda does work, seeing as he was released by the police and his crimes "swept under the rug". He doesn't act like someone that wishes he hadn't committed his crimes...

I just assume Akechi's deepest desire is not having a dead mum. Or a dad that actually loves him. So. You know. Sorry Akechi, even in the dream reality, you don't get a living mum or loving dad. Be grateful to be alive.

The fistfight at the end is just as stupid as it was the first time around. Don't get me wrong - I love that it's there. It's glorious. But still stupid.

Ok, the "Free Kuro from Juvie" is way more positive and uplifting when it isn't just Mishima alone in the street, trying to get Joker out of prison and Takemi giving one(1) interview. I am so glad I decided for NewGame+.

Ohya's freaking awesome. Love her.

Valentine's Day is too cute when you're spending it with someone.

It's February the 15th and I am being A M B U S H E D.

White Day is also very cute and very different when you've got someone to spend it with.

I do miss being able to give Sijiro something on White Day though. He deserves chocolate.

Kinda weird that the game keeps asking me who I want to romance, when. I've only romanced Makoto. Because I am loyal.

I can bid my friends farewell! Yay!!!! I'm finally happy.

Based on online advice, I go to the jazz club. And Kuro. Kuro. What do you mean you weren't Akechi's friend. You were the closest thing he had to a friend. That makes you his friend by virtue of being closer to him than anyone else.

I am so glad I chased up Kawakami. Her story was one of the best in-game. No, I'm not biased because I'm a teacher too. I'm not.

Move over Akechi, I have a new favourite and her name is Ohya. You go, you beautiful, independent, alcohol-loving lady!

When talking to confidants, I love that there's implication that the adventure won't actually stop for Kuro. At least, that's my interpretation, since it nicely builds into my head canon that Akechi is alive and that Mementos is purged, not erased (again, Akechi couldn't have died, or it'd be in the news...)

The game ends. I can start another NewGame+, this time with all stats already maxed out and over 6 million yen in my pocket. I don't, because I basically got the satisfying end what I wanted.

Idk, maybe in a year or something. Might replay it then, on higher difficulty.

Second playthrough took me 50 hours.

Man, that was wild.

[heyimcelery]

Okay so I watched all of Ninjago Dragons Rising s2p2! I've got so many thoughts and I'm dumping them all here in a long list. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

to start: Cole!! He's a family man! He's got a boyfriend and they hold hands and they care for their kids and Bonzle so obviously came out to them and omg I wanted to cry. The joy of acceptance. I mean come one she kept saying how alone she felt, they're found family, she was repeating that she chose he town name and identity and the villains were insistent that she wants a person but just a spell like come on

But there's more than that, I have questions I have concerns!! Like wtf happend on Coles quest?? With Sensei Wu??? Like he disappeared and turned up again and said he would explain but never did.

Cole also came back from that in his bolder form so did he figure out he could do it on his own then? Is that what he learned on his quest?? If so it's gonna be a little awkward when he tried to explain that to his bf Geo.

With part 2 I really want to see the whole gang meet them and talk and catch up on everything. Like cole has been missing since the merge and no one this season cared. At all. They hadn't seen him in ages- didn't even know if he was alive until drs1 but nope no worries or concerns. Not even a question of what he was up to.

When he came through the portal Zane wasn't worried or confused at all, just oh? You need some help?? Sure let's beat these bad guys and not worry or show emotions! Is a tearful reunion for my fav character too much to ask?? Cuz he clearly deserves it. :(

And then into both Zane and Coke this season!! Love them!! They've always been my fav duo (gonna have to start shipping geo/Cole/Zane as poly now) it was so fun to see them going around together with Bonzle. They had some great moments and I'm praying we get more in the next part.

On the other hand it was a shame they got such small roles- just seperated from the others as a way to help Bonzle. It means they didn't have the same lessons or knowledge the others got which is totally unfair!! They have a lot to catch up on. They also never got a chance to be part of the main battle

It's dumb but I was kinda hoping for Cole to show off his stronger powers (he always seems to get new powers every other season but that's a discussion for another day). Like sure he could use his robotic mech suit but that's been done before! He can do his boulder thing now (unless somehow he still thinks he can't which means he kept up that form for several days on his quest) and when he made that giant mid hut to protect his family!! I want to see him do that again! Let me man go ape shit to protect Bonzle.

And on another note, Geo my beloved, you should get a chance to shine with your powers. A chance to show off or at least have a talk about them with Cole.

Next up WyldFyre. I was worried they would make her the annoying comic relief cuz if her injury but her talks about losing loved ones and dragon culture and her home were really sweet and it was great to see some development so driven by battles. I love those too don't get me wrong but like I needed to see this side of her. And I adore her relationship with Kai, being besties/mentors/dad for her works so great for both characters.

I will be first to admit that

Kai wasn't really my favourite. If you couldn't tell I love Cole followed by Zane. Always have and likely always will. I suppose that early Kai reminded me too much of some guys form my class and they turned into shitheads and I've always struggled to reconcile Kai's image form theirs. He was always a little too brash, hotheaded, and too often written as stupid to fall into my good graces.

And yet this season I adored him. Of course I've never hated him but like this season made me see what all his fans (many many fans) see in him.

I thought Kai being the first to master such a new, difficult and crucial skill was incredibly satisfying. Form all the way back to season 1 he's been the butt of jokes- having to learn he's not the centre of the universe and sometimes it's others like Lloyd who are the chosen ones. That's all great but him now getting a starting role, his ability being fueled by thoughts of his family, by his childhood and by protecting is friends was just too good to ignore him. Love this form of his character more than any other I've seen.

And now Kai is trapped :(

I'm glad he's got Bonzle with him tho so hopefully they can have each other's backs (she's meant to be a POWERFUL spell after all) they'll need each other if they're trapped with those other 4 guys. If they can apparently demolish everything then I'm rather worried for the duo. Tbh I'm sure they'll survive just fine, probably making jokes at Cole's expense all the while.

On a side note, I found it super cute how WyldFyre was willing to protect and go down with Kai. Besties I'm telling ya

Now Jay. I've never thought too hard about him I know he's one of the favs of the fandom but like Kai I was never so besotted with him. Still a great guy and omg I feel so bad. One of his worst fears was always being alone and now stuck, confused, forced to hide such a fundamental part of himself.

On the other hand he's got a gun now so that's fun!!

And you can't talk about him without mentioning Nya. He worst fears being him forgetting hurts my soul. And she was so sure it could never be true that she snapped out of her nightmare state!! She's going to break when she finds out.

She's already grieving her own brother, we saw her break down into WyldFyre (more proof she's an honorary sibling by now) but now knowing what's happening with Jay, I'm saying the angst is going to be overpowering. It's a greek tragedy fr

Part 2 is going to be rough. Jay only had a single scene but it's already a sign for the worst to come.

Speaking of things being rough, Lloyd is going THROUGH IT!! give this poor guy a break. I do appreciate that we physically get to see the effects of all his trauma- that everything that's happened has real consequences for his character and the story but I can't help but feel bad.

I've also suffered from anxiety for most of my life so to see it in a character like that feels really personal to me. Hope he gets a little break though, god knows he deserves it.

Have to say it's pretty funny that Lloyd's had so much Oni trauma that he forgot that he's part dragon too. Yes ninjas dragons can do spinjitsu why are you surprised at this point

The animation this season has been incredible, the fights were beautiful the angles so interesting and dynamic and I could go on for hours about how much I love it. It's always great when kids -and even animation in general is treated with respect. It doesn't dumb it's ideas and stories and characters for the sake of it's younger audience, and that makes it so much better for me who is definitely out of the age range.

I have my more points to make but I've been adding stuff in and off for ages so I'll probably go through this all later. Thanks for reading, please I want to know your own thoughts too I love discussing that kinda stuff!!

<3