#and technically eddie/marisol BUT IS IT REALLY

[hotshotsxyz]

the most important thing

(pre-buddie) (862 words) (7x06 spec) what are weddings for, if not completely ignoring the fact that you're in love with your best friend

It’s a glance, at first. And then a longer look, when he’s sure no one’s looking back. It’s the slope of Buck’s shoulders that catches Eddie’s eye.

There’s an ease there that he hasn’t seen before. An ease he’s never really felt himself, either. And a part of him wonders – is it really that simple? He tightens his grip on Marisol’s waist and spins her around, smiles at the high peal of laughter she lets loose into the cool evening air.

Eddie allows his eyes to drift, following the line of Buck’s shoulder down his arm and to his hand. He watches Buck’s thumb pull slowly across Tommy’s jaw, sees the way Tommy’s mouth ticks up into a small smile, like his lips are following the motion.

He drags his eyes away then, feeling like he’s intruding on something.

“Oh, I think I need a minute,” Marisol gasps as the song comes to an end.

“Me too,” Eddie says with a chuckle. “Can I grab you something?” He gestures vaguely towards the refreshments table.

“Some water,” she says, punctuating her request with a soft kiss pressed into the corner of his mouth, “would be wonderful.”

Eddie smiles and fights the ever-present urge to wipe the kiss away. “Water. You got it.”

Buck finds him trying to balance a cookie between two cups and takes it from him with a grin. “You can come back for it, you know?” he asks with a teasing sparkle in his eye.

“You’re just jealous your date’s not bringing you a cookie,” Eddie replies.

Buck’s grin grows even wider. “My date,” he says, “is braving the bar for me.” He tilts his head towards the throng of people crowding around the single bartender.

“Alright,” Eddie laughs, “Tommy wins. You’ve got a better date than Marisol does.”

“Eh, don’t sell yourself short.” Buck bumps his shoulder into Eddie’s, a familiar gesture that makes him feel warm, even on a chilly spring night. “He hasn’t asked me to move in with him yet.”

“Bet he hasn’t asked you to move out, either.” Eddie says wryly.

Buck’s eyebrows shoot up. “You—”

“Yeah,” Eddie interrupts. “But we didn’t—we’re just going to take things a little slower.”

“Slower,” Buck repeats. “Yeah, that’s – that’s probably not a bad thing.”

“I think it’s good,” Eddie says. “I think—I never give myself enough time, you know? Even with Shannon—we hardly knew each other when we first got together, and then—”

“I get it,” Buck says softly, and Eddie knows he does.

“I just need to get to her, really get to know her. I think… I need us to be friends before we can really be something else.”

Buck’s expression changes into one Eddie doesn’t know how to read and he swallows. “Yeah, that’s—friends. It’s a good idea. It’s—that’s the most important thing, isn’t it?” It’s not a rhetorical question, Eddie can tell.  It sounds more like some kind of revelation.

Eddie glances over Buck’s shoulder and sees Tommy on his way back, a drink in each hand. He returns his gaze to Buck. “I think it is,” he says softly. He nods in Tommy’s direction, then turns to head back towards Marisol.

He doesn’t remember the cookie until he’s nearly back to her side.

“What were you to talking about?” Marisol asks after taking a long sip of water.

“Just—tonight. The wedding,” Eddie answers, and it almost feels true. He takes a sip of his drink and allows his eyes to wander again.

“I’m glad it all came together,” Marisol says. She takes his hand, and Eddie tries to ignore the way he immediately wants to pull it away.

“Me too,” Eddie replies. “It was touch and go for a minute, there.”

“It’s a good thing you had an extra suit,” Marisol says, playfulness in her voice. “And a brand new one, no less! Did you have a special occasion in mind?”

Eddie grimaces. “I’ve had it for a while, actually. Just, never got around to taking the tags off.”

“Well, I’m glad you finally did. You look wonderful in it.”

“Thanks,” Eddie says. The skin beneath his collar starts to crawl.

Across the dance floor, Eddie watches Buck laugh, then tuck his face into Tommy’s neck. A part of him is jealous, Eddie realizes. Of the easy way they touch, of the comfort that’s settled between them with just a few drinks to aid it on its way. It’s not a feeling he knows, not like that. He’d like to, though. He turns back to Marisol.

“What’s your favorite movie?” he asks.

She furrows her brow. “My favorite movie?”

“We said we were going to take it slower, right?”

Marisol nods. “We did.”

“Well,” Eddie asks, letting go of her hand so he can spread his apart, “what’s slower than a first date question?”

Marisol covers her mouth and laughs. “Fair enough,” she says. “Ask me again.”

Eddie puts his drink down and looks her in the eye. “Marisol,” he asks, “what’s your favorite movie?”

Inexplicably, he finds himself thinking that, if it were Buck sitting here across from him, he wouldn’t have to ask.

[lover-of-mine]

This is gonna be a very weird color meta on Eddie, so strap in, I guess🫶

Okay, so, during season 7 Eddie didn't have a lot of color attached to him, while he is usually in neutral tones, he had no color except for a few specific color theory moments (the green to match the blue with Buck during 704 and 706, the pink from the bachelor party) until 707 and the Kim of it all, where he gets some color until 709 when we see him having that release of feeling moment with Shannon's ghost with the white shirt, he's mostly in black, he is in white/off-white on the dates with Marisol, but it is still technically no color.

Then in 710 we see him in 4 different outfits, 2 blue ones, a maroon one and a green one.

A while back I tried to offer the possibility that the show is using maroon for Eddie in the same way they use green for Buck (you can read more about this here) and I also have this running theory that the thing Eddie is chasing is color.

When you look at Eddie's relationships after Shannon died, the women aren't really allowed color, unless the context is attached to Christopher. It was worse for Marisol than it is for Ana, Ana was allowed some baby blue shirts, Marisol was trapped in a greyscale, except for the chaperoning date and the lunch Eddie was daydreaming Shannon.

But why is he chasing color? Shannon had a very bright and warm color palette.

And when contrasted with Eddie's earthy tones, that color attached to her stands out. The show goes as far as making Shannon a point of color in the room during 213. The orange she's wearing makes her stand out. And I think in some weird metaphorical way, Eddie has been looking for that since she died.

I have a running theory that the same way Buck found his blue during his coming out arc, everything about it is blue and yellow, but Buck himself is blue, all leading to the coming out scene, because the blue he is wearing there makes for an extremely harmonic composition. (you can read more about that theory here and about the blue and yellow in general here and here)

But to make a really long theory short, considering the colors in the coming out scene and the way that Buck matches the background, and Eddie is front of a yellow background while in a color that absorbs all colors and doesn't allow him to reflect anything, I am making the jump that Eddie is gonna find his yellow.

But here's the thing, yellow is attached to tragedy in Eddie's life through the people he loves. Shannon died in yellow, Chris is in yellow during the tsunami, during the breakdown and when he leaves.

So, it's not like the warmth he's seeking here has a great connotation when it's detached from him, but if the goal here is to make him okay with himself, to lead him to a place where Eddie is the yellow, could have some fun color theory implications.

But how did I get here? Because of the white in 709 and party hats. First the white. A few noticeable moments Eddie is wearing white is in 218 when his parents try to convince him to go back to Texas, 301 when he drops Chris off with Buck before the tsunami, in 511 before the breakdown, and in 709 when he's talking to Shannon's ghost through Kim.

And when you think about white as a color of innocence or hope, and the way the show puts Eddie in white as shit hits the fan, the use of white with Eddie is very interesting in this context too. Because these are all situations where Eddie is in a bad place and thinks he's doing the right thing that eventually leads to something awful, so the white leaves that positive connotation of "I hope I'm doing the right thing" straight into the coldness, emptiness, isolation idea. White is used a lot as a color of change, to signify the ending of a cycle or the beginning of a new one, it's why some cultures have white as a color for births, some have for funeral, why we use it at new years, so I think the white in 709 was kickstarting something.

And the hats, or maybe more than the hats.

I talked about this with @dangerpronebuddie but I never made a post about this possibility because it is a bit of a reach even by my own standards. We established Buck found his blue.

Chris is red, in a sense, his glasses are red, his crutches are red, the color Eddie picks for his party is red. (Buck is also very red when it comes to emotionally vulnerable moments, but that's not really relevant right now lol)

Eddie is greenish in general. I feel like a lot of us associate him with army green and it would make sense. But green is not a primary color. Not unless you are talking about physics and light.

Red, blue, yellow. Chris is the red, Buck is the blue. And I think on some level, Shannon's death is the yellow. Things that define the way Eddie lives his life. But, well, he can't exist as a secondary color.

Okay, but what does this have to do with party hats?

He is in 2 colors that have red as a base, orange and a very reddish brown, a representation of the thing he misses, while also learning into someone else who's red.

Because it is interesting to break down that orange into the base colors Eddie is trying to make up for, the fact that he cannot give Chris Shannon back or get Chris to come back. Especially with the way Buck is red and he's trying to make up for the space Chris left.

All of this to say, I think there's some real intense color theory going around here, because the cupcakes were a combination of blue, yellow, red and orange, and we saw Ryan in what's presumably an sandy yellow Eddie outfit. And I think he will work towards some sort of honey/gold yellow as he finds himself, to mirror the colors of Buck's coming out scene.

I think that's all for today. I woke up with this thought in my head, figured I might as well share it lol

If you read all this, I love you 🫶

Tagging the people who interacted with this about being tagged in my metas, you can do that too if you wanna be tagged

@sparkedblaze @caw-salem @dreamofsomepiphany @100ceruleaneyes @linus-lucy @chaosqueery @gina-spike @chimchiminie98 @elvensorceress @dangerpronebuddie @ijustdontlikepeople @182daysof @steadfastsaturnsrings @sparklespiff @inell @miles--to--go @jesuisici33 @wolfdeans @dingdongfries @lunarsolar1 @thegreenwoodarcher @angelcamael @glasscities @kejfeblintz

[matan4il]

911 ep 704 first watch reactions

IDK if anyone else will talk about this, but Josh and Maddie were a great comedic start to this ep! XD Also. Interesting choice to give Josh, the currently only openly gay male character on the show, more lines again. Is it a reminder he's there, so he can be a part of Buck's journey later on? *eyes emoji* We'll see.

All of these pretty women (I should also mention that as a non-American, all the gasped, "It's Joey!" "It's you!" "It's me!" are missing me by a kilometer. Whoever Joey is, he's not Madonna yet, if you want me to get excited about him, 911, you're gonna have to give me a bit more than a single name), hitting on Buck and Eddie, and the ease with which both men turn them down... Sure, this is a part of the set up regarding Buck, and Eddie technically has an excuse, but also. Most straight, taken men would at least be tempted. They'd at least bite their lips with frustration. Have some reaction. But not Eddie. And when you remember that he was distinctly not taken in ep 204, but still had the same reaction to pretty young women hitting on him and Buck... I know this ep is all about celebrating the 'oh' moment of another guy, but that's not gonna stop me from rooting for Eddie to have similar realizations eventually (and get together with that certain other guy *cough*).

LMAO So, Buck is meeting up with the guy who's gonna be his sexual awakening, a man who's good looking, gave him a thrill already, is an impressive fighter pilot, and the first thing he can think of to say, is blurt out Eddie's name? LMAO Oh, this boy really is down bad...

Man, that bit where Tommy tells Buck he can have it both ways, he can get certified and continue to serve with the 118. Thanks for the beautiful foreshadowing, 911. Buck saying he's keeping his options fluid... Holy shit, the show really wasn't holding any punches back.

OMG, why is Harry old enough to be making Bathena waffles (and then turn out to be involved in an altercation)? I swear, he was still on baby formula just a second ago. How did 7 seasons just fly by!?

Buck getting jealous over Eddie and Tommy sparring. Considering the fact that Buck was the one getting all hot and bothered over semi-naked Eddie in the gym in 201, and ready to jump into a boxing match with him, this is making me wanna punch a wall myself. The symbolism in this ep is NOT very veiled. Add to that Eddie mentioning how he and Tommy met and just... clicked. In the same conversation that reminds us of Buddie' in 201's first meeting, where they clicked? (even though they were both too dumb to realize in what way) 911, just let me catch my breath for a second challenge! Also, Eddie is dating Tommy more intensely than he is Marisol? Okay. Duly noted. These firefighters are both so freaking hetero, I'm sure that's exactly what every casual viewer was telling themselves at this point. And poor Buck, getting his hopes up that Eddie is asking him when he's free, so they can go on a date themselves, only to be let down. Poor baby boy. But this feels like it's spelling out the answer to whether Buck's jealous over Tommy or Eddie. So, yay for Tommy helping him with his bi awakening. But it's clear who's really occupying Buck's heart and mind, and whose time he wants. FOR SIX FREAKING SEASONS NOW.

Oh, it's continuing, the show really is trying to kill me, having Buck complain to Maddie about how often Eddie has been seeing Tommy. The annoyance with how cool Tommy is, that's exactly Buck's reaction to Eddie in 201. So, if Buck and Tommy will then kiss, what does that say about what Buck didn't even realize he wanted to happen with Eddie back then, hmmm? I also love that Buck wants to be the cooler "dad's friend" in Christopher's eyes. That's his son, you can't take that away from him. And of course, Maddie was his first confidante about his feels for Eddie, she was the first one to call out his boy crush (in 204) and to hear Buck automatically think about Eddie, when he hears, "He's cute!" (in 206). It's so freaking right that she is now the witness to Buck's bi jealousy meltdown. I love her calling him out on it. "Is it circled with a heart around it?" Honestly, this is better than front row seats at the Bachelor mansion. I'm just disappointed in Chimney and his imaginary popcorn that he doesn't get to witness all of this firsthand and get what it means. Letting down all Bachelor fans out there, Chim. -_-

And then Buck's back in the gym, staring at Eddie, feathers ruffled. Am I going to make it to the end of this ep? Who cares? This is fantastic! XD He tries to catch Eddie's attention with the little weightlifting without a spotter stunt, and it's specifically him. Chim turned out to also be impressed by how cool Tommy is, but Buck is circling Eddie, like a clueless Jane Austen heroine, about to become a hit teen romance movie. Ravi falling for Buck's weightlifting attention trap is just getting in the way. Chim asking about Buck's weird basketball hugging session is nothing but a way to get to the ball game with Eddie. Okay, I'm at the point where I need to be chewing on imaginary popcorn.

Athena is one of the strongest characters on television, ever. Precisely because she's not just tough when she has to be, she has a heart, too. The scene where she told the woman she accidentally killed her own son was hard to just watch. IDK how she actually did that. I'm not sure if viewers who aren't moms get it, 'coz I didn't until I went with my sister through her pregnancy. Motherhood changes you forever. You feel your kid moving inside you. You bond with them in the most intimate way possible before they're even born. You go on a wild journey with them after, where every second counts, let alone every hour and every day, when they're hungry, when they're cold, when they struggle to sleep, when they finally do, when they take their first step, when they fail and fall... The love and protectiveness are something different to anything else in life. IDK how Athena, who gets all of this, managed to break the news to this mother, that she had unknowingly killed her own kid. I think to me, this has to be the most devastating scene in the entire history of the show. IDK if I'll be able to watch it again.

When basketball game scene starts, and Chimney knows something's up, I was already chuckling. But then Eddie sees them, and the first thing isn't expressing joy that his best friend is there, it's asking how did Chim talk him into this. "He always says no to me." They BOTH always talk about each other in romantic coded language, it's not just Buck, and in the same ep where we get bi Buck confirmed, that makes me froth at the mouth...

"So I'm your basketball beard. I feel so bonded." Not Chimney calling Buck out, while using the term for closeted gay guys using someone as a cover. I AM SCREAMING. Thank you, 911 gods!

That montage with Eddie and Tommy high fiving each other right in front of Buck's salad face, while their muscles glisten in the sun, and Top Gun-like music plays in the background, like the biggest nod to the volleyball scene from that gayest movie ever made, which we already had Buddie paraphrasing in 201. I am fine, this is fine. I love this burning kitchen I'm sitting in.

Buck causing Eddie's injury because of his jealousy (which again, is not about Tommy. He made an impression on Chim as well, who was screaming, "Buck, I'm open! I'm OPEN!") and not even getting to offer some help, because Tommy's already on it... I hope ABC is happy with their viewership dropping next week, because they've killed every Buddie shipper in the fandom.

"Well, I'm not a 14 year old girl..." Both Buck and Maddie together: "So stop acting like one." Love this scene, love these siblings, love that the reference with the two blonde Sarahs sounds platonic, but it's also from a past season on the Bachelor. 911 really wants you to know this is romantic, and Buck's going through a late sexual awakening in his 30's, instead of in his teens, even before he's able to see it.

So, the conclusion to Buck and Maddie's convo is that he needs to talk to Eddie, to make it better, yet the person he ends up talking to is Tommy, and that leads to the bi awakening kiss... It's a classic rom com switch, we hear a knock at the door, we expect it to be THE love interest, showing up at the right time, and it's someone else, making the protagonist's romantic journey so close, but about to get longer. It's further emphasized by a shot over Tommy's shoulder, in a way that he can easily be confused for Eddie, and which is reminiscent of moment when we saw Buck standing at Eddie's door, or both of them there toegther.

It was a nice talk, I loved Tommy saying he can't replace Buck, I def noticed how he went to talk about it in the context of Chris instead of Eddie (hmmm... I wonder why), but my fave part was how Buck glowed when he heard his son doesn't shut up about him. ^u^ He even took a second to look away from Tommy, to take it in with a huge grin. Then Buck and Tommy start warming up to each other, moving towards flirtation, and what comes out of Buck's mouth? "You don't have to tell me how great Eddie is." That's not how you flirt with a guy, Buck. I liked Tommy kissing him, and Buck not recoiling. Like he's always known on some level, but could never do anything about it. "That's better than fake mouth static." LOL The stuff that great romance is made of.

I'm SO happy Buck is getting this storyline of realization he's bi, I've thought it would be important and that the show has laid some groundwork for it since 107, and I don't mind that Tommy is the "romantic other" who helps him with it. I do believe this is important bi representation in and of itself, away from Buddie, and if nothing else ever comes of it, this is still beyond wonderful. In 2024, we still barely have any characters who start out presumed straight, and are allowed the freedom to figure out that maybe their sexual orientation is different than what they thought, despite the fact that in reality, human sexuality is complex and confusing and a mess. So this really matters to me, as a human being, and as a queer person. That said, I can't ignore the past 5 seasons, and the way this storyline played out, with Tommy kissing Buck, but the whole thing being emotionally centered around Buck's feelings for Eddie, it means that whether they go canon or not (and at this point, I find it hard to believe they'd make Buck canonically bi, taking this HUGE risk of homophobic backlash, and not go there with him and Eddie, but just in case they don't, I wanna say this), it'll always be Buddie for me.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[brainrot-dot-org]

ok he definitely crossed a line going to dinner, but like people are freaking the fuck out about him GOING TO DINNER- like yes he lied to kim and buck about his situation, and i’m sure to marisol, but technically all he did was get dinner with a friend.

also karen took hen back after she cheated with ava, and taylor took buck back after he kissed lucy.

people are freaking out about this cheater storyline for no reason and acting like eddie is now somehow less then all the other characters and that he shouldn’t end up with buck anymore. like my dude is really just trying to work through his unprocessed trauma….

[lenaboskow]

PLS PLS PLS GET INTO HOW WOULD CHRIS REACT I find it so interesting, because most of the times is Chris just going "Great ! Im happy!" which valid, but honestly? I really like when it's more complex than that, like in the fic Pinky Promise by rainbow_nerds, that explores a bit the fact that Chris does in fact has abandoment issues, like I don't doubt that Chris (even angry) wants his dad to be happy, but c'moooon, his mother was his primary caretaker (because his dad left for the military, though it always hard for me to get the Diaz Timeline), then she left him, then she came back, then she died, his dad almost died at least twice (that he is aware of), Buck in the hospital, etc. Chris is going to have many complicated emotions ! I love him ! And I just wished people explored more all that potencial, you know?

i vividly remember making a diaz boys timeline back before the s7 finale but i just spent thirty minutes looking for it and i'm pretty sure i never posted it so... oops. maybe i'll make one later with the references but (apologies for the mess this is i tried to make it organized but i’m sick so there’s only so much i can do lmao):

when you look at it, buck has been consistently in christopher's life longer than shannon ever was, even if you restart after the lawsuit. shannon was him primary caregiver until he was about three, and then for a year it was eddieandshannon, after which she left. after that, it was consistently eddie. even if he wasn't around that often because he was working, he was still there, and that's what chris remembers. she came back for about half a year when he was seven, but then she died.

not counting the lawsuit, buck has been in christopher's life since he was eight. but the lawsuit wasn't that long, it was a few weeks at most, so the real answer is he's been in his life since he was seven. that's seven years at this point. to chris, buckandeddie has been a constant, more so than eddieandshannon, even if it's not the same type of partnership. and that's just a fact. sure, he'd known shannon for seven years, same as he's known buck, but technically she wasn't there for all of it. that's what he remembers.

but the same way eddie thought he needed to be with shannon romantically so as not to ruin the relationship, chris probably thinks eddie and buck need to keep the status quo not to ruin the relationship. especially when you take into his warped view of romantic relationships. shannon, ana, marisol, they all ended terribly for eddie. and buck? i'm not sure what he's told chris about his relationships, but he doesn't have a much better track record. abby ghosted him, ali left at the first sign of trouble, there was the whole jonah scenario with taylor (who actually was in christopher's life, so that definitely messed with chris a bit), tommy broke up with him seemingly out of nowhere...

it makes the most sense that chris wouldn't want them to date. if chris was home when they told him, i can imagine him calling pepa or carla, kind of a parallel to him running away to buck in s4 (which he can't do now for obvious reason). i don't think the arc would last long, i think whoever he ran to would start the conversation and tell him about an ex that they're still friends with, and then eddie would come to pick him up and they'd talk it out, there'd be a buckley-diaz scene, end of ep.

but if he was still in texas? he'd probably yell at them over the video call and then refuse to answer any calls or texts afterwards. buck and eddie would probably "break up" for an ep or two, and be absolutely miserable. this probably culminates in eddie taking a trip to texas (alone, maybe not even telling buck) and talking it out with chris, addressing their mutual fears about the relationship and eddie explaining that even if it doesn't work out, they'd still be friends, and even if that doesn't work out, buck would still be in his life, that it wouldn't be like when his mom left. there's definitely a video call to buck in this, after eddie and chris have talked their feelings out, and then chris would ask to come back home, effective immediately.

but there's also the question of how chris would react if eddie tells chris about his feelings for buck (pre-relationship). he'd probably tell eddie he can never act on it, then tell buck the same thing (without telling eddie) and then there's a few eps of buck and eddie acting distant from each other before chris snaps and says "you weren't supposed to act like you're already divorced!". of course that's if he's in la. if he's in texas it would probably play out the same way it would've if they were already together after they stopped avoiding each other and finally talked it out.

of course, they could go the easy route and have chris say "it's about time" but this is 911 we're talking about, they probably won't do that

[bam-bi-buck]

Buck & Chris’s relationship + abandonment issues - long post

Do y’all think part of the reason Christopher went with his Grandparents is because he felt safe enough about Buck’s love and commitment to him that he knew Buck wouldn’t be mad at him when he came back?

Before I continue with that train of thought, this thought process is shaped by theories I’ve seen about why Chris called his Grandparents instead of Buck when Chris has gone to Buck for support with his anger/fear due to Eddie’s whole thing twice before (4x08 & 5x13) but he didn’t this time? Why? maybe because viewing him as a parental figure in this case impacts how he views Buck likelyhood to be completely on his side as his grandparents (especially Helena) are instead of being on both of their side - which he was

Chris was really angry and hurt, he didn’t want Buck to try to fix this, to try to keep them together, he wanted Buck to be angry at Eddie with him, but that’s not who Buck is and both Chris and Eddie know that

That’s why Eddie called him and Chris didn’t

Now back to Chris, his abandonment issues, and his relationship with Buck and how we can interpret it based off 7x10

Chris has severe abandonment issues, which is not surprising at all based on what he’s been through - Eddie being in active duty throughout his early childhood, then working himself to the bone with three jobs, Shannon leaving to California and then dying

Then he had feelings of abandonment during the pandemic, he lost contact with both Ana & Marisol after their relationships with Eddie ended, his bisabuela moved back to Texas, and we didn’t heard about Carla at all season 7 (I’m like 98% sure - please correct me if I’m wrong)

In season 7 he even said he feels like girls leave when Buck had that dating talk with him

(Even Buck technically left him for a bit, during the lawsuit era but I’m unsure is he views it that way or not though we do know that Chris missed him during that time - Grocery Store Divorce and all)

However, Buck has since made a promise to him and their relationship has evolved a lot since then

We know that Chris goes to Buck when he’s mad at Eddie (4x08) and there’s lot of evidence that indicates he views Buck as a parental figure (he talks to Buck in a similar fashion as he does Eddie, he seeks out Buck for support, the way he spoke to Buck while he was in a coma, just to name a few)

Plus there’s a reason Eddie chose Buck as Chris’s legal guardian and why the writers chose to include that plot

Because of Buck & Chris’s bond

And he lost his mom, he’s almost lost his dad several times, he’s gotten attached to two different women Eddie was seeing and has now lost them

When Chris ubered to Buck’s place and said that everyone leaves, Buck promised he wouldn’t leave Chris

And then when he talked to Chris before he left with his grandparents, Buck did flounder a bit (as would I in that situation, not judging here) but he does make a comment about understanding Chris wanting to go which would probably reassure Chris that Buck isn’t and won’t be mad at him

I think Chris would have had a harder time leaving if he was scared of Buck not being there when he got back

We all have our assumptions (mostly negative from what I’m seeing but I’m not judging I do too) but we don’t actually know what Helena’s saying to Chris, if she’s talking down Eddie’s love for him or not

But while it’s possible she is, Eddie told Chris himself that he can come home at any point he wants

We can also assume that part of why Chris left is because he’s mad + hurt and lashing out wanting Eddie to feel the same as him / doesn’t trust Eddie right now and is waiting for Eddie to do something to prove himself before he’ll be ready go home

I do believe that Chris knows that he can go home to Eddie (no matter what Helena may or may not be saying) and thus him leaving isn’t triggering his abandonment issues and that he’s just waiting for, as I theorized above, for Eddie to prove he won’t be hurt again if he does

and thus his abandonment issues won’t be triggered regarding Eddie (this time) unless he’s convinced he can’t go home, something happens with Eddie, or Eddie fails to prove himself to Chris

OR his abandonment issues were already triggered and he felt like he was losing Eddie (again) to Kim and her madness and he left as a means to protect himself from that, and is, again waiting for proof that he’s safe to come home from the aftermath of all that

All that to say I don’t think his abandonment issues would stop him from leaving Eddie with his grandparents in this particular instance

Ethier way though… because Chris has had a lot of experience of not having both his parents, losing parents, dealing with the fear of losing parents, and losing positive authority figures, it had to be really tough to leave Eddie himself, no matter how angry and hurt he is

And if I’m right and he does view Buck as a parental figure as well then we might assume he’d also fear losing Buck as well by leaving to Texas

I think his abandonment issues would have been triggered regarding Buck while living in Texas, especially since he’s probably always worried about losing Eddie to a certain extent (army, overworking himself in Texas, work as a firefighter, etc) he lost his mother twice, lost both Ana and Marisol who may not have been parental figures but were positive authority figures in his lives, except Buck promised Chris he wouldn’t leave him

And so I think independently of his feelings regarding abandonment and Eddie, Chris still feels secure in his relationship with Buck to not fear losing him during his time away

Just a theory and I could totally be off but it’ll be really interesting to see how they address everything when Buck and Chris reunite (if they do)

[saveahorserideaneddie]

Hi Louis!

If you’re still doing this:

😈👊

- Saturn 🪐

I am absolutely still doing this, bestie <3

👊- The Eddie Punches Tommy fic

Also titled: "He's Not a Saint (And He's Not What You Think)"

----------

“I punched Buck’s boyfriend last week, Carla,” he told her. “In front of everyone because he said something about Chris. I let my anger get a hold of me and I broke a man’s nose. I got suspended from work because me and Buck got in a screaming match over it on a call today. Christopher doesn’t need to be around someone like that.”

Carla stared at him for a moment. “I’m sorry- did you just say Buck’s boyfriend?” 

Realization flooded Eddie that Carla had indeed been gone since February, and had missed that whole update in Buck’s life.

“Yeah, he- he realized that he’s bi; he’s been dating Tommy Kinard from LAFD Air Operations since about the end of April,” Eddie told her. Technically they had first kissed towards the beginning of the month, but Eddie didn’t count the two weeks of them planning a date and then not talking because Tommy decided to ditch Buck on a curb as part of their relationship.

“And that boyfriend isn’t… you?” Carla asked, almost cautiously.

“Wha- No, obviously I’m not Buck’s boyfriend, Carla,” Eddie replied. “I just got out of a relationship with a woman because I emotionally cheated on her.”

“With your dead wife,” Carla said.

“With a woman who looked like my dead wife,” Eddie told her.

“Eddie,” she sighed, turning to face him and grabbing his hand. “I want you to be honest with me… this woman who looked like Shannon- did you have any romantic feelings for her?”

“I took her out on dates,” Eddie replied.

“You took Ana Flores on dates too,” Carla pointed out. “Going out on dates doesn’t mean you are attracted to that person romantically.”

“She looked like my dead wife,” Eddie argued.

“Your dead wife who you were not happily married to by any means,” Carla said.

“That wasn’t Shannon’s fault,” Eddie told her.

“That’s debatable,” Carla said, carefully, “but that also isn’t what I said. You yourself told me that you only married Shannon because of Chris. So again, I’m asking you, other than her resemblance to Shannon, what about this woman drew you to her?”

Eddie opened his mouth, unable to say anything. 

“And when it comes to Shannon,” Carla said. “Did you really love her romantically- or did you, like with Ana, try to convince yourself you could love her because you wanted things to work for Chris to have a stable home.”

Eddie felt like he was being laid out on a cutting board, being flayed open with a carving knife. Carla was touching on things that Eddie hadn’t even admitted to himself- things he had definitely thought about before, but had never allowed himself to put any stock in them.

“And while we’re on that trail,” Carla continued. “Did you feel any of that for Marisol either?”

Eddie stared at her, feeling his heart pumping as he realized just how right Carla was about all of this- he felt like his lungs were constricting at the thought of what that insinuated.

----------

😈 - The Homophobic!Marisol Fic

also titled "I Don't Wanna Miss You Like This (Come Back, Be Here)"

----------

At the end of the night, they stood on the sidewalk, both waiting for their Ubers to pick them up. Buck’s hands were in his pockets as they stood in a peaceful silence- not awkward or stilted; something calming as if they had been friends forever. It wasn’t long until Emilio’s Uber pulled up, and he turned to face Buck.

“I had a really nice time tonight, Buck,” he smiled.

“I did too,” Buck returned the smile, looking in the man’s brown eyes- they shined beautifully in the streetlights, but there was something missing in them.

“I know it was only our first date, so forgive me if this is forward, but…” Emilio trailed off before slowly leaning forward to cup Buck’s face in his hands.

Buck let himself be drawn in as Emilio placed a soft kiss on his lips. Buck kissed him back, soft and slow, getting used to the sensation for a few moments before Emilio broke the contact. Looking up at Buck with a soft smile, he whispered a goodbye before getting into his Uber and driving away.

Buck watched him go, still standing with his hands in his pockets as a wave of realization rushed over him. That had been the first time he kissed a man. His first kiss had been with a man he just met outside of a restaurant after he had spent the first part of the date pouring his heart out about Eddie.

Eddie.

The person Buck has been wanting to kiss now for longer than he had realized.

Buck had just had his first kiss with a man, and it wasn’t Eddie.

He reached the loft about an hour later, collapsing onto his bed as he tried not to let his mind run at 100 miles per hour. He tried not to think of how he spent the first half of the date talking about Eddie. Tried not to think about Emilio immediately clocking his feelings for Eddie. Tried not to think about how easy Emilio was to be around and talk to.

Tried not to think about how similar Emilio was to Eddie.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a text from the man himself- telling him once again he had a great night, and he hoped they could meet again soon. Buck told him he would love that, Emilio quickly asking if he was free Sunday.

----------

Make Me Write!

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

VERY curious about this holiday special 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

Hahaha not technically a holiday special! The very undecorated pine tree emoji will hopefully eventually make sense. (I'm actually a grinch)

60 for monster!Eddie & HOH!Buck:

---

Someone is speaking, eulogizing. But it’s not English or Spanish. Eddie doesn’t understand it. Not even a little, so it’s not even a close language. 

Every time - because the dream repeats itself frequently in the days and weeks following Buck’s coma - the following things happen. Eddie stumbles forwards, towards the open grave. He thinks he’s shouting for Buck the same way he shouted up on that ladder. When he reaches the mouth of the grave, right beside Maddie, he falls to his knees. The eulogizing continues in a foreign language, but everything else just seems to stop. There’s a collective gasp of horror. Maddie looks at Eddie with narrowed, accusatory eyes. 

And even though no one is saying it, Eddie just knows. He knows why everyone is looking at him like he’s monstrous. He reaches his arm, covered in a suit sleeve, behind his body to touch his back. His hand finds only a dark, cool hollow. The edges of which feel like rotting tree bark. 

“I’m sorry,” he says to Maddie when he pulls his hand back. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t… I didn’t mean to-”

“This must be why he’s dead,” Maddie says. “This must be the reason.”

And that’s always where Eddie wakes up, sweating and frantic, pinching at the skin of his back to make sure it’s still real. 

Those dreams last, in decreasing frequency, for two months. 

ii. 

He doesn’t tell anyone, but the reason Eddie calls Marisol after running into her at the hardware store, is because he needs a date to his sister’s wedding. 

That sounds terrible. Maybe it is terrible. But it’s true. 

No one has said he needs a date to Adriana’s wedding, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t been made clear. For one thing, she is his youngest sister. He quite literally changed her diapers. Probably more of hers than Christopher’s. Never mind the fact that she’s only twenty-two, and really fucking young to be getting married - take him for example - everyone will see him arriving single as a sort of pitiable thing. Poor Eddie. Still alone. Or, what’s wrong with Eddie, that he’s still alone? Pepa has been pressuring him. His parents always mention that they don’t understand why he ended things with Ana. They think Christopher needs a proper mother figure in his life. Abuela even likes to tap his cheek and tell him there’s someone out there for him. It’s incessant. 

So, does he want a new relationship right now? Not entirely. No. But does he think bringing Marisol - kind, bubbly, successful Marisol - to the wedding will make his overall experience a hell of a lot better? Yes. Yes, he does. Besides, it’s not like he doesn’t like her. She’s nice. She’s funny. She’s cute. This is fine. This could be good. 

At the very least, it won’t be bad. And no one will look at him like there’s something deeply wrong with him. 

Besides, Buck has started seeing Natalia. The death doula. Who is beautiful and funny and who he likes a lot. This isn’t technically a reason to get a girlfriend, except that, well… Eddie hates being a third wheel. 

It’s a little weird asking her, he will admit. After less than three months of seeing each other. It’s too soon, and he knows it. 

[stars-planets]

Okay I just want to rant really quick

Spoilers for 911

S7 E7

So I know everyone in the fandom hates Marisol. But my question is why, why do y’all hate her so much that y’all are referring to the fact that buck should be more hurt by Eddies cheating than the actual person he’s cheating on? Don’t get me wrong buck will be hurt that he was used as an instrument to help him cheat. But why is her pain going to be so ignored, cause I can see it now how there’ll be so many comments along the lines of well “this is great cause he broke up with her now we can head towards the buddie storyline”. The thing is no one is technically holding Eddie back from possibly discovering he’s gay other than Eddie. Is Eddie using the fact that he so wants a mother figure in Christopher’s life to continue dating women YES!!! Absolutely. But no one is forcing him, no one is asking him too. What he has to realize is that finding someone for Christopher isn’t going to make him happy but finding someone for him will. But this is absolutely not the answer. Plus it feels so out character for Eddie as a person to cheat regardless of context. Like when Hen cheated we didn’t know her well enough to know if this was normal behavior, but with Eddie he’s so do the right thing even if the right thing feels wrong and acting purely on obligation alone, this is the first time in a show cheating has made me really wince. Marisol has been in the show since season six and we know absolutely nothing about her. Her likes or dislikes, who she is as a person and that’s completely on the writers for not giving her any substance cause they totally can. But there is no active reason to hate her expect for y’all thinking she’s holding Eddie back. Another thing this will definitely cause a rift in him and bucks relationship. So even if they are dating by end of season 8 it’ll still be beyond difficult for them knowing eddies past with cheating. Along with the fact that when everything is too normal he self sabotages the relationship every single time cause I think deep down he doesn’t feel like he deserves simple and reassuring love from someone unconditionally.

Thank-you for listening to my Ted-talk

P.s. y’all can’t make me hate a women I don’t know nothing about and root not for Tommy who we don’t know enough about either!!!

[lover-of-mine]

No, because the thing is, 911 has 3 established main couples, 2 we see them getting together, bathena and madney, and the other is introduced to us already established, henren are already married when we get introduced to Karen. But an interesting thing there for me, is that Karen is introduced to us while Hen does something that most people find unforgivable, cheating, which makes us sympathize with Karen even though Karen technically only exists to be Hen's wife, so even tho the audience is usually biased towards the main character, we end up caring about Karen more, which makes it so even though she only exists through Hen, we like her, we like them together. Madney and Bathena on the other hand work because they exist individually, we care about all four of them, the relationship is an extra point for the character, it's not why they're there, so it works because we are not heavily biased in any direction. And that's the thing that makes me question what's going on with the love interests for Buck and Eddie. Ali barely existed for us but there's a really heavy point against her with the whole not being able to deal with Buck's job. Taylor is right off the bat introduced to us as someone who will use anything to get on top, including wanting to capitalize on Bobby's addiction, so we always end up suspicious of her because she was willing to hurt a character we care about for her own gain, so she never really had a chance, she only exists through Buck, and she already hurt someone else, so most of us don't care that Buck cheated on her and we're not really surprised when she uses the Jonah thing, so no real chance there. Natalia is a little too excited about Buck's death at first, I personally can't get past the cool comment, that feels insensitive but maybe that's just me, but either way she learned more about Buck and she left, so right now, she only exists through Buck and we know she's capable of leaving at any inconveniences (I don't really think finding out the guy you're trying to date is a sperm donor and is gonna end up housing the mother is just an inconvenience but you get me) so we will be heavily biased towards Buck on any future conflict because Buck is the only one we care about there and she left him before. Imma add Lucy here because it's also interesting the way that Lucy is the one that has the best fighting chances here, Buck and Luck could work and be a fun couple to watch, Lucy is a firefighter so it would be easy to make her exist outside of Buck and make the relationship balanced but the whole kissing Buck while he's drunk and dating someone else makes it so most people will be biased against it, the same cheating thing that makes us root for Karen and despise Eva, ends up working here, even if it's very mild version because we don't really like Taylor. And like, Shannon, she was always written to be fridged, it is very clear that Eddie was always planned to be a single dad army vet widower, so she never had a fighting chance to begin with, but she left Christopher, abandoned Eddie to deal with it all, so most people would never root for her anyway, because even Eddie is shown as not sure of her. I kinda think Ana falls into the same category as Ali, I don't think we see enough of her to care about her, but the panic attacks really kill her chances even if she didn't have something wrong about her introduction. And, well, Marisol has 3 seconds of screen time, there's not enough information to do anything there. Also, I think Lena falls in the same category as Lucy, it could work if they really wanted (I don't think they did) but Lena was the person that took Eddie to the first fight so she has points against her.

So the thing is, the show knows how to build relationships, so what the fuck are they doing with Buck and Eddie considering they are making sure they work together and individually if there isn't some sort of plan to eventually get them together?

[wackybuddiemewbs]

Have I written some 26k words basically only based on some of the insane promo treats we've gotten - and twisting it around to waltz right back anything that could become canon? Apparently yes. *shrugs* Do I know where I'm heading with this? Nope. Will that keep me from it? Also nope. Have at it, peeps! Cheers!

This Future We Choose

Part 1/???

Part 2 • Part 3

While Eddie won’t use the Q word, even in his mind (if only to keep a very exasperated Buck from pestering him), things have been relatively calm ever since he got to the station.

In general, things have been just that. Calm.

Well, except for the chaos which are the wedding preparations, which are in full swing these days. Though Eddie was glad he could opt out of that, for the most part. The part he’s involved in largely revolves around the tasks Buck was assigned (insisted to to be assigned). Because that means he has to deal with Clipboard Buck wanting to make everything perfect, and upon his sister’s request make sure he doesn’t go into some kind of frenzy. Which Eddie will gladly do. That’s one of the easiest tasks for him, really.

But other than that, and the usual chaos there always seems to be, it’s been… calm. Things have been going great with Marisol. Sure, some bumps in the road while getting to know each other, but Eddie never had any illusions about it that things would be a smooth sail start to finish. But overall, it feels like life is going in the right direction again.

Even though there’s been a shipwreck not at all that long ago, it doesn’t feel like they have been lost at sea for quite some time. Which is refreshing.

Eddie is pulled out of his thoughts when he feels Buck’s arm brush against his as he settles down next to him on the couch.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Eddie greets back. He doesn’t miss the clipboard clutched between Buck’s fingers. “Back to wedding planning, I take?”

“Laugh it up all you want, but if you don’t write it down somewhere, you’re going to forget it. And those two most definitely are,” Buck snorts. He takes the pen he’s had clipped to the top and ticks off some boxes.

“What’s the achievement you can tick off, then?”

“I found the perfect location for Chim’s stag night,” Buck announces proudly. “I had to promise Maddie that we wouldn’t do anything crazy. She’s right, we’re way too accident-prone taken together. So we’ll keep it simple. Nice lounge all to ourselves, nice suits, good food, lots of booze, and some silly challenges Chim will have to do, so I have blackmail material for the rest of his life.”

“Was that the reason why you insisted on planning the stag night?” Eddie grins.

Buck would have planned the entire thing alone, had his sister let him, but Buck understood that this was important for Maddie and Chimney to do together. Though he would not let go of the responsibility of hosting the stag night. To quote: “You can pry that from my cold, dead hands.”

Buck smirks back. “What other reason could I possibly have?”

Eddie chuckles softly. He is glad to see Buck this cheerful again. He’d been worried, for quite some time. Ever since the lightning strike, really. Buck had told him some time back that he no longer felt the same. Which Eddie understood, better than maybe he ever wanted to. Because he doesn’t like to think back to his close calls. He wants to look forward, not back.

Eddie’s worry had grown significantly when Buck ended up in the middle of Kameron’s and Connor’s relationship drama over the child he helped them have. Buck hardly spoke to him during the time Kameron camped in his apartment. While he can joke about it now, Eddie has no illusions about it that it must have been extremely tough on Buck. Not just because Buck suddenly had to take care of a woman he technically helped get pregnant, but to help two people navigate to the life he helped them to. And that while struggling himself with the knowledge that he would not be part of that life he helped create.

But the baby is there, and Kameron and Connor have settled into their new home in Washington, to be closer to Kameron’s parents. So Eddie hopes that the distance actually helped Buck along. If he had to guess, it did. Because the forlorn expression, the longing with which he looked at his niece or at Christopher, it seems to have faded somewhat. These days, Buck is busy helping Chim and Maddie have their dream wedding, and Natalia of course.

Eddie will have to admit, he was not too sure about that relationship at first. He felt like he was having a flashback, Buck ending up with in a relationship with someone right after a traumatic event. And then of course, Natalia’s profession, her closeness with death… it honestly didn’t sit quite right with Eddie at first. Because he didn’t want to think about it anymore, how Buck died, how Buck was dead.

Three minutes and seventeen seconds.

But Natalia wasn’t like he feared she would be. She is lovely and supportive. She knows what she wants in life. And Eddie gets the impression that Buck can talk to her about some of those things about his death that Buck doesn’t share with anyone else.

So yeah, all in all, it’s calm.

Eddie is called back to reality by the noise of the pen being stuck back to the clipboard. He taps Buck’s biceps lightly. There was something, right. “Oh, before I forget. Marisol suggested we could go on a double date again. She found this supposedly amazing Indian place that’s all over social media. You and Natalia in?”

Double dates have been great, honestly. Natalia and Marisol got along right from the start. And while Eddie definitely won’t admit to that, it made things a bit easier. Sure, he’s went on dates on his own, but having Buck with him always puts his mind at ease. And Eddie likes to think that it also helped Buck smooth things out with Natalia, as they had a bit of a rocky start, to say the least.

“Oh, ugh… that’s…”

Eddie frowns at the way Buck’s entire body seems to tense up.

“Natalia and I… broke up.”

Eddie tries hard not to stare, but he is not sure he manages. “What? How long?”

“About two weeks. She got the last of her things she had over at my place, like, two days ago,” Buck answers, barely moving his lips apart as he speaks.

Whiplash is what comes closest to what Eddie feels hitting him right at that moment.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Eddie asks, hoping that he doesn’t come across as too demanding. Because it’s not like Buck owes him that information, even though they are best friends. Eddie just feels like this is something he should have known.

Or at the very least, suspected.

Buck shrugs it off in a vain attempt to make it seem casual. “Because it’s not a big deal, honestly. We both came to the conclusion we weren’t heading anywhere. It’s not like it was with Taylor or so.”

“You were together for months,” Eddie insists. “That’s a pretty big deal, if you asked me.”

“I wasn’t… I wasn’t trying to make this a secret. I guess I was still sorting myself out. Because, as you said, we’ve been together for a while,” Buck tries to explain, but Eddie can sense that there are things Buck would rather say, but doesn’t. He can see it by the way he purses his lips. Because Eddie knows Buck.

“But you are… you are okay?” he asks, softer this time.

“Totally. This was the first time I managed to end things before anyone got hurt. That’s what I call improvement, right?”

Eddie looks at him sternly. “Buck, you don’t have to pretend with me.”

“I’m not.”

“You’re joking, even though you’re likely still sad about it. So yes, you’re pretending,” Eddie sighs.

He knows Buck, better than Buck probably knows himself at times. At least that’s what he keeps getting told, even by Buck’s own sister. So Eddie feels like, yes, he knows him. Which is why he knows Buck, since a young age, learned to make people think he is fine, even though he is anything but that. Because he was always more afraid of the pain of being left behind than he was of facing the pain of handling things on his own.

But Eddie won’t stand for it. Ever. Buck doesn’t have to be in pain for him to see him.

“Sorry. You’re right,” Buck concedes. “I just… I wanna try to see the positives.”

“And that’s okay,” Eddie exhales. “But allowing the negatives has to be okay, too.”

“Frank taught you that?” Buck teases.

“He wrote it on a sticky note and hands it to me every time I go down that route, because he says he’s too tired always repeating it to me,” Eddie huffs.

Frank is great, actually. He helped him a lot. Some time back, Buck said that therapists are like reality filters. And he’ll have to give him that, Frank does just that for him.

“I kinda love that guy,” Buck chuckles, but then his face twists again into that fake smile Eddie hates more than anything.

Eddie opens his mouth to reply something, but then the alarm goes off.

“Duty calls!” Buck rushes off before Eddie can say anything more.

So much to how things are calm. More like, the calm before the storm, huh?

###

Eddie settles down on the bench next to Buck, who is still rummaging through his locker to get out his spare shirt. Looking at Buck’s bare torso, he can’t help but still think about how it used to be marked by Lichtenberg figures not at all that long ago. And how odd it felt when they were gone without a trace. Like none of that ever happened, even though it did.

Three minutes and seventeen seconds.

“So, to touch up on our conversation earlier…,” Eddie begins.

Buck lets out an exasperated sigh, rolling his eyes at him. “Eddie, honestly, it’s fine.”

“I’m not saying it’s not fine. I just want to offer beer and pizza over at my place, if you feel the need to talk about it,” Eddie argues.

He doesn’t want to press, but he knows that Buck needs a bit of a push sometimes. And Eddie feels like he owes it to Buck, to keep pushing. Because Buck has done that for him, even though Eddie pushed back very hard. Buck was one of the reasons why Eddie went to therapy. Buck didn’t give him an easy way out. He became his check-in with reality, until Frank took over the duty.

And Eddie is thankful for that, he honestly is. He knows how hard that must have been for Buck. To not just pretend like all is fine, to step into the room with him. To be uncomfortable and even risk being blown off by Eddie for it.

So, to his mind, it only seems fair to do the same for Buck now.

Even if that means being a little pest about it.

Buck slips on the clean shirt. When he sticks his head through the collar, he has that dorky expression on that always makes Eddie smile at him fondly. “So the guy equivalent of having ice cream and watching romcoms.”

“We can also do that, if it makes you feel any better,” Eddie snorts.

“Nah, I’m down for pizza,” Buck laughs, sitting down next to him, bumping his shoulder against Eddie’s. “Under one other condition, though?”

“Condition?”

“I get to pester Chris a bit.”

“How’s that ever in question?” Eddie huffs.

“Well, as you keep lamenting, he grows up so fast. So I need to get as many hours out of him before he’s too cool to hang out with his dad’s best friend,” Buck explains.

“You have my allowance to pester him, even when he’s too cool to hang out with you. Because he damn well has to keep hanging out with me, too, whether he’s too cool for all that or not,” Eddie huffs.

“Awesome. Then we should get going.”

“Once you made yourself look presentable, sure,” Eddie snorts, running his hand over Buck’s still messed-up hair.

Buck dodges his hand away. “Thanks, dad. Do I have to tuck the shirt in, too?”

“Nah, that’s fine.”

“You’re a great friend, you know that?”

“Yeah, I know I’m amazing like that.”

“You really are.”

“Right back at you.”

The two smile at each other. Buck then turns his head to look at the lockers. His eyes seem to fix on Eddie’s open locker. Something shifts in his demeanor, only for a second, too short for Eddie to decipher it. But before he can say anything, Buck gets up, shoulders his bag, and throws them both shut.

“Then let’s go!”

###

The ride over to Eddie’s place remains mostly silent. They go back and forth about their choices for pizza toppings the way they always do (because Eddie will fight anyone over having the audacity to put pineapple on pizza, including his best friend). Christopher is very happy about Buck coming over, and the pizza, of course. And despite being a bit on the moodier side of his teenage years these days, he and Buck soon fall back into their usual rhythm of talking about anything that comes to mind and playing some video games after dinner.

Though Eddie can’t shake this sense of foreboding, all the way until Chris is fast asleep and he’s rummaging through the fridge to grab the beer he’d promised Buck. Because something is definitely up with Buck, and if he had to guess, it doesn’t only have to do with his recent break up.

But Eddie is going to get through that. He’s dealt with worse. They both have.

So he grabs the beers and proceeds to the living room. Buck looks only a bit uncomfortable on the couch, mindlessly playing with a loose thread on his shirt. Eddie settles down next to him, holding out the cold bottle to Buck. He takes it, flashing a bit of a shy smile.

“So,” Eddie sighs.

“So.”

“Is there anything you wanna talk about?”

“Want is a strong word,” Buck huffs, choosing to play around with a loose edge of the beer’s label instead of the loose thread on his shirt.

“You know how I mean it.”

“I don’t know, honestly. It’s been a first for me, too. Because things have been going great with her. I still like her a lot,” Buck admits. “I still miss her, to be honest.”

“Then why break up?” Eddie asks.

“Maybe the self-help books have taken over my brain, but… one of those things I keep thinking about all the time is… what do I actually want in life? Ever since the lightning strike, I… I feel like… like I’m not going to get another chance like that. To come back from the dead. Sure, lightning doesn’t strike in the same place twice, but… there’s always another disaster right ahead. Which makes you think about your choices in life all the more, you know?” Buck chews on his bottom lip pensively.

“I felt the same, whenever I had a close call,” Eddie admits in a hushed voice. “It forces you to reevaluate your choices. I get that.”

After he was down in that well and almost died, it changed a lot of things for him. And unknown to Buck, Eddie changed a lot about his life, too, by putting him in his will.

“I mean, I’ve spent quite some time even before that, trying to figure out what I want. What truly makes me happy. But after the lighting strike, after I… died… I just wanted to try again, to get back in touch with myself, to not just act like myself but… be myself again. Looking back, I guess I was looking to Natalia all the harder because she was fascinated by death in a way I’d always been myself.”

Eddie grimaces. “Fascinated?”

Because he can safely say that it was not fascinating to watch lightning strike through Buck, to see him dangling up there, not to find a pulse, to do compressions and see nothing happen on the monitor, counting the seconds, praying, praying, praying, and still nothing.

“Like, I was never fascinated by other people dying, but I know a part of me was… chasing it, this feeling of coming close to the edge, and taking a U turn at the last second. It always did something with me that I can’t really explain. So yeah, I guess fascination is the best word I can come up with, for the lack of an alternative.”

“Well, you do have a track record of getting hurt, for your parents to see you,” Eddie mutters.

And while Buck seems to have made his peace with that somehow, more so since the lightning strike, there remains a petty part in Eddie that keeps holding that grudge in Buck’s stead. Because he won’t ever understand how parents can look at their kid, and look away the way Buck’s parents have done it with their kids. Yes, he ran away from responsibility for a while, but Eddie can safely say that he never looked at Christopher like he was a nuisance. He was afraid of not being enough for him, never the other way around. Just like he never looked at his son to be anything else, never the means to some end.

“Yeah, that’s… certainly been a recurring theme, I’ll give you that,” Buck hums in agreement.

“… Which is why you felt like she was seeing you.”

Eddie had wondered, for a long time, what Buck had meant when he told him that Natalia saw him. A small part had been hurt at that, to be honest. Because Eddie always got the sense that he had an eye on Buck – and far more importantly, that Buck knew that he did. That Buck dared to rely on it, when he’d grown accustomed to not having anyone in his life to have his back. That people only saw what he projected, and never what lied underneath.

But looking at things now, Eddie starts to see where Buck came from with this statement. Natalia saw him in a way none of them did, couldn’t possibly. Because none of them could feel any fascination, thinking back to this moment. He certainly doesn’t. And while Eddie tried to offer support, to be that shoulder for Buck to lean on as he’d been to him during his breakdown, Eddie knows he tried more to distract than turn the light on it. Be it poker nights or having him spend time with Christopher, to get him out of his own head.

In that sense, he made Buck look away. And Natalia made him look at it. Because she was fascinated by it, she was not afraid to look at it. And deep down, Eddie is still afraid to look at it, to remember it.

Three minutes and seventeen seconds of not having Buck in our lives.

No, he doesn’t want to remember that. He wants that to fade, like the Lichtenberg figures. He wants this world gone he was stuck in for three minutes and seventeen seconds, forever.

“Yeah. Natalia was seeing me the way I had always tried to get my parents to look at me, I think. Subconsciously, at least. Like, to me, feeling alive… truly alive… I grew up with this sense of how I could only ever get there if I was living on the edge. Getting close to death was the way to live, for them to see,” Buck tries to explain.

“So Natalia looking at you for how you died and came back… felt like you were back alive again, in a way that you haven’t felt since all of that happened,” Eddie concludes.

“Yeah,” Buck confirms. “Which means that, in the end, I was chasing a former version of myself. Maybe not Buck 1.0, but…”

“… Evan?”

He shrugs. “Maybe, I don’t know. But might be.”

“Then, what changed?” Eddie wants to know.

Buck leans further back on the couch, inhales, exhales, then inhales again. “I helped Connor and Kameron have their baby. I held that little thing in my arms and he was perfect… And I spent a lot of time, trying not to think about it. Like I didn’t try to think too hard about the fact that I died. Because, as glad as I am that I could help them… there was a very ugly part of me that regretted it. And I… I didn’t want to look at that, at all. Because I don’t want to regret this. I don’t, not really.”

“But he was perfect, and he wasn’t yours to keep. And that hurt,” Eddie whispers, feeling his own heart clench at that.

Eddie still doesn’t know how Buck managed to do it, to follow through with this most selfless act. It’s perhaps a different thing if you don’t know the people you make a donation for, if you don’t ever see that child. But Buck knows Kameron and Connor. He helped Kameron when Connor got cold feet. He delivered the baby. He held it. And he didn’t get to kiss it, didn’t get to call it his. He had to give it over to Kameron, he had to give it up. Eddie can safely say he couldn’t have done for those two what Buck did. He looked at Christopher once, and despite all of his anxieties, he knew right at that moment that there wouldn’t be anything he could ever possibly love more than that child.

“Yeah, it hurt. Like, I knew this was the outcome. Well, I didn’t know I’d actually have to deliver the baby, but… I knew that, in the end… I’d be donor, not dad. That was the deal. I walked away from this, even though it hurt. And I honestly think I managed not to insert myself into their life, after. To just be that donor for them… But yeah, holding that baby… I just… I realized just how much I want this.”

Eddie blinks. “To have a baby?”

“To be a father, to have a child that I get to call mine. Like, I don’t care one bit whether the kid has my DNA. But I… I realized that one of those things I’ve been yearning for, for so long, is to… to be a father. Not just Uncle Buck, not just Donor Buck. Not just… In-case-of-emergency Buck… Just… Dad Buck, just dad.”

Eddie can feel something tingling uncomfortably in his stomach. Is that, at least in part, how Buck sees the will? That he is the in-case-of-emergency, should something happen to him? And that this is all, or most of it?

Which may beg the question: Why would he want it to mean more for Buck? But Eddie has no answer to that yet.

Eddie coughs lightly to gather himself again. “And Natalia… doesn’t want kids?”

“She says that she really doesn’t. Which is totally fine. And it’s honestly not the reason why we ended things. The more we talked about what we want out of life, the more we came to realize just how different our goals were. And sure, you don’t have to want the very same thing at all times, but…”

“… you need a general direction, hit some milestones together.” Eddie nods.

“Right. And we had to see that we like each other a lot, but things don’t align for us beyond that attraction and care we feel for one another. Even without the family planning issue. So we figured we’re better off trying to find someone who’s better suited to walk that path with us.”

“So you’re really fine with it, breaking up with her?”

“I was never good at… break ups. I… I always felt like failing. But this time, neither one did anything wrong. We just… figured out that it wasn’t going anywhere. So… ugh, yeah, I’m good, with the break up. I’ll miss her for quite some time, I’m sure. But… I feel like it was the right choice, and that I managed to follow through with it before it was too late, before anyone got hurt. I’m honestly glad about that.”

“Right.”

Eddie takes a swig from the beer, which turned almost lukewarm between his sweaty hands.

“So… you want to be a father.”

He knows he shouldn’t be surprised. Buck always loved kids. You only have to see him interact with Christopher once to know that Buck was born to be a dad one day. But for reasons Eddie can’t really explain, there is something pulling on the strings around his heart upon that admission, that realization, really.

Because, in the end, that means he is looking to another child to take care of. What Eddie doesn’t know is why that actually hurts to think.

“It doesn’t have to be, like, tomorrow. Or even this year or the next. But I know this is what I want, rather sooner than later. I know that now.”

“Ever since you held the baby,” Eddie assumes, but Buck shakes his head. “Actually before that. I just… didn’t understand it, I think.”

Eddie tilts his head. “How do you mean?”

“You know, in that dream I’ve had while I was in a coma… I… my parents talked about my kids. And I remember how my heart skipped a beat. That in this version of my life, I was a dad! Only to find out that those were the kids in my class, as I was a teacher. Like, dreams often tell us what we actually want. And… and I feel like I’ve been shying away from that.”

“From hanging around kids? Hardly.”

“No, I mean… I love kids. I always did. I love babysitting. I love, beyond anything, hanging out with Chris. But the idea of having a child of my own… for a long time, it’d felt more like a threat than anything else, “Buck admits, chewing on his bottom lip.

“Because you’d lose your freedom?”

“No, because if I had a kid, I’d have a reason not to… be willing to give my life for the greater good. I know this sounds silly, but…,” Buck says, his voice trailing off, but Eddie interjects, “It’s not silly. I know how I struggled, trying to reconcile doing this job, while also being a father. Some days, I’m not sure I’m managing.”

There were many things he struggled with, coming back from the war. His parents were on him for wanting to become a firefighter. But yes, it was on his mind. What it meant to do a job that could very well mean he wouldn’t get to go home to his son. Because he was willing to sacrifice his life for someone other than his son. But Eddie found enough resolve in him to always try his hardest to come home. And to this day, he dares to think that this is enough.

“See, I couldn’t have that. After I found this job, my path in life, my purpose… I couldn’t imagine doing anything else. But then I met all those amazing parents, you very much included, and… and I had to realize that it is possible. That you can still dedicate yourself to this purpose, but… but also to having a family.”

Eddie smiles faintly. Whenever he is in doubt about his ability as a parent, he has to look no further than to Buck to find that reassurance he craves more desperately than he’d want to at times. Because to Buck, Eddie is the picture boy kind of dad. While Eddie would not sign up to that, it always gives him reassurance. That he’s doing okay, even if he feels like he is failing his son, sometimes. Because there is someone who makes him look at all the other times he was doing well. Because there is someone who sees Eddie not just for the things he messed up, but for all the times he did right, and who sees him for who he can be as a dad further down the road.

“Coming back from what happened, I… I felt like I couldn’t go back to life as I knew it. And that’s true. I won’t ever be the same, after I… died. But I definitely won’t find my happiness by chasing an unhappy former version of myself. I… I want more out of my life than casual relationships and… only being a backup. I want… more. And I… I try very hard to tell myself that that’s okay. That I’m enough, to… to have that.”

“Of course you’re enough. You’re allowed to live whatever life you choose,” Eddie assures him, because he knows that Buck needs to keep hearing it, to let that sink in, the same way he relies on Buck to tell him what he can’t seem to grasp sometimes.

“I’m starting to get there.” He leans his head back. “I mean, it honestly feels a bit like a joke. Like, I die, literally die… and I spent so much time before and after the lightning strike, trying to find true peace, true happiness… and… and now I feel like I finally found out… and I have no idea what to do with that information. Like, what’s next?”

“You’re allowed to take your time, figuring that out, Buck.”

“Yeah, I know. I just… I guess I’m being impatient. Or rather… I don’t know how long I have to keep waiting, before I get to have that happiness. Because I spent my whole damn life, waiting. And I fear that if I keep waiting too long, I… I will keep missing out.”

He looks at the ceiling for a long moment, wrinkling his nose with a pensive frown. Then something sheepish flashes across his face, forcing him to twist his head back around to look at Eddie. “Which is to say, I’m not… unhappy, being Uncle Buck and all that. I’m not unhappy, period. I’m still over the moon that you’ve put me in your will. That you’d entrust your child into my care, should anything happen to you. Like, I don’t want it to come across like this is lesser to me. It’s not. I love Christopher. But… but… but he isn’t mine, not actually. He’s yours.”

Distantly, Eddie is called back to the small fight they had a few weeks back, in the basketball court. When they disagreed about how to help Christopher navigate his first crush. And how it’d slipped out of him during the game, that Buck wasn’t Christopher’s dad, that it was not his call to make. Eddie had regretted that even more than Buck could ever have regretted shoving him a bit too hard to take the ball from him thereafter. And oh God did Buck regret that.

Eddie had never meant for it to come out that way, but now he starts to see just how much that must have upset Buck. Because it confirmed this fear that he’d been carrying around himself ever since the lightning strike. To be confronted with the reality, yet again, that this was not his child, not his call to make. Because Christopher is Eddie’s son, not Buck’s. Even though he loves him like he is, Eddie has no doubt about it.

“I’m more to Christopher than I am to anyone else’s child. And I’m forever indebted to you for… for giving me that purpose, for letting me share in that with you,” Buck continues. “It means the world to me.”

“But you want to be a father. So that’s just not enough,” Eddie mutters.

“Hey, if I could steal Chris, I probably would,” Buck jokes, but then turns more serious again. “But… yeah, I guess I want more, in the sense of… not just having a kid on the weekends, taking them to the zoo, help with school projects, or pick’em up when the parents are busy, and all. I want the whole damn deal, you know? Parent teacher conferences, figuring out schedules, fussing over them getting a fever, dealing with tantrums, being the bad cop, fail and keep trying…”

He lets his head fall back around so he is facing the ceiling again.

“And… and I start to allow myself to go for it, actually go for it. But I want you to know that, no matter what happens, that’s never going to change anything about me caring about Christopher in any way I can. Because I will, always.”

Because Buck still loves him, as his own. Even though he isn’t. Only ever in case of emergency.

Eddie closes his eyes for a moment, to let that sink in. Truthfully, that’s not what he saw coming, when he put Buck in his will, not even when he told him about it at long last.

“I know,” Eddie almost croaks. “You’re always going to take care of him. Because you love him, so much.”

“I do.” A smile creeps up his lips, but it looks fake, Eddie notes. “I mean, who knows what the future holds? If you and Marisol get more serious, or you wind up marrying again… who knows how long you’ll need it in the papers that I’m the backup, right? Coz then he’d have another parent watching out for him. In which case I’d be the backup for the backup.”

Eddie feels the air knocked out of him this time. He had never thought about it too hard, though maybe he should have. Because yes, if he winds up finding someone to spend his life with, they’ll be the ones to take care of Christopher before Buck.

That would be the normal thing, at least.

But in Eddie’s mind, ever since he put Buck in his will, there has only been one person to take care of his son, should something happen to him. And that person is Buck, always only Buck.

But was that just wishful thinking on my end?

“Which is to say… I think it’s not fair for me to rely on you and Christopher for that, so very much. To find that part of my happiness. Because that’s actually just between the two of you. And I have to be fine with that. But that also means I have to… go for it myself, or else I won’t ever get it.”

The words get stuck in Eddie’s throat. How Buck can rely on them, how it’s totally fair, how much he wants him to rely on it. But who is Eddie to say that to him, after what Buck just admitted to? Because Christopher is not Buck’s. Even though, despite being all grown up these days, Buck is still Christopher’s Buck. So why should Buck have to keep relying on what he can get from Eddie and Christopher, if he can find the one thing that can make him truly happy? To be a father in his own right?

How would that be enough?

“I feel like I blow this way out of proportions, but I just… I felt like if there’s one person who should know before all else, it’d be you,” Buck concludes.

“I’m glad you told me,” Eddie says.

He is, he really is. But why is it that his heart is aching so much right now, he wonders?

“Is it okay… if that stays between us two, for a while? Until I’m a bit more sorted out about… how to take the next step? It’s not like it’s a grand secret, but I feel like it’d raise questions I wouldn’t be able to answer right now.”

“Of course.”

“Thanks, for everything, really.”

“Never for that.”

Eddie watches as Buck keeps looking at the ceiling, which leaves him to wonder what Buck sees there.

The night fizzles out after that rather quickly. Before he knows it, Buck is tying his shoes and slipping into his jacket.

“Well, I guess I should be going, then. Thanks for… I was going to say for listening to my crap, but I’m gonna say… for being there. I… that means a lot,” Buck says.

“Always, Buck. Always.”

“Thanks. Well, I’ll be on my way, then.”

Eddie watches Buck as he stops by the door, for the briefest of moment. His fingers run down the door frame. And Eddie can’t help but wonder whether he’s saying goodbye to something. What it is, he isn’t sure. But he fears that Buck is saying goodbye to a pathetic fantasy they both got lost in, for what it seems.

Because, contrary to what Buck found out about Natalia and him, Buck and Eddie want to hit similar milestones, walk down the same path, but they can’t walk them together.

And isn’t that the biggest joke in it all?

[try-set-me-on-fire]

I read finally going water (i waited to be in the headspace and mood ) and it didn’t disappoint it was so good it made my cry at least once for chapters sometimes more you have a way with writing the emotions so tangible really I love it , you mentioned follow up stories and I’m excited I can see the all possibilities to explore , both buck and Eddie and the trauma , Chris trauma when they both come back to work , what about the Diaz siblings reconnecting and maybe another family Diaz meet up where Eddie brings buck and having to navigate the dynamic with buck officially being his boyfriend so many stuff ! I might have become obsessed with the universe lol sorry for the ramble the main thing is a love it

Thank you!!! Sorry for the distress I’m glad it was enjoyable!!

Ooh I didn’t really have anything with Chris or the Diaz siblings planned but maybe I could work them into my existing ideas… so far I have a little 4 part series of follow ups that I’ve written uh very little of. The general ideas:

- Buck gets hurt at work for the first time post cruise sinking. Eddie’s still off work and is struggling pretty badly with having survived something that should have killed him (again). Buck is really upset at being hurt because he knows it’s going to upset Eddie further. Told from Bobby’s pov going from the station to the call to taking Buck home to Eddie.

- 5 or 6 months after the sinking. Eddie pov. Buck and Eddie are getting married! Except Buck is running himself ragged and compromising on any nice ideas for the wedding he might have because he wants it to happen as fast as possible. Eddie knows its because he’s afraid about what could happen if Eddie were to die again and he wants some more paperwork tying them together and tying him to Chris, but Eddie confides in Bobby that half the time it feels like Buck is planning his funeral. Dont they just get to be in love! Dont they get their happy ending! Bobby says, of course, that he should probably talk to Buck about this. Ends with Eddie actually buying them rings to propose for real (that barely happened, it was almost a business discussion when they decided to go for it), and beyond that asks if Buck wants to go to city hall and get married the next day. Eddie insists it wont actually count, it will be a marriage on paper only, they’re going to have a long engagement and plan their real wedding as big and extravagant as they want it, but he understands Buck’s fear and wants to soothe that in whatever way he can. Buck apologizes for kind of forgetting the being in love part of wanting a wedding, and says he’d love to go not get married to Eddie.

-8? 10? Months after the sinking. Marisol is doing electrical work on her house and would love a firefighter’s guidance to make sure she doesn’t accidentally catch anything on fire or electrocute herself. But she doesn’t really want to talk to Eddie still! She’s still kind of mad at him! So she calls Buck instead (she’s also still a little mad at him but they went through it sort of together for those few awful days so this seemed the better option). Buck looks SO nervous being there like she’s going to suddenly attack or something. She kind of rolls her eyes about it. As they work he tells her they’re starting to do better, and he and Eddie are getting married. He actually admits they are already technically married and swears her to secrecy because literally no one knows except Bobby because they had to update station paperwork. Not really sure where I want this one to go i just wanted Marisol to have a chance to work through things! That all really sucked for her! I think she and buck end up as weird kind of friends.

- Around a year and a half after the sinking. A kind of bachelor party/group vacation to a lake somewhere. Everybody piled in a big rented house. Just a bunch of snippets of everyone finally doing actually okay and Buck and Eddie excited to get married for real.

[sunflowerdigs]

Under the cut, my long af summary of how I would handle the Buck, Eddie, Tommy of it all in 7x06. Probably 911 will come up with something so much better (not probably, definitely, and I am hyped!). But...I spent too long on this so.

If I had my druthers, as both an enjoyer of chaos and of moving plots forward, I would have Tommy arrive at the bachelor party and have Buck be surprised to see him because Chim is the one who invited him. Why? Because Tommy knows people in Vegas, so he probably got Chim some fabulous deal on hotel rooms or bottle service or a show or something. Anyway, that's strike one - Buck didn't even know he was coming and didn't think to ask Chim for an invite (fair enough, really, he's a new bi, he's not used to bringing SO's to bachelor parties - also, he's technically not out to Chim and, surprise, surprise, Maddie kept this one close to the vest). But, Buck is genuinely happy to see Tommy and kisses him in front of Chim (a preview of what will happen at the wedding later on). For strike two, I'd have Tommy be surprised that Buck and Eddie coordinated their costumes. Maybe Buck picks up on that surprise, maybe he doesn't. For strike 3, I think I'd just have Buck and Eddie acting like a twosome, the way they always do. They know each other's karaoke song (and perform it together), know each other's drink order, are getting pictures taken of them posing together in their outfits, are talking about something funny that happened with Chris last week, all of it. It would be a much, much less in-your-face version of how Madney acted in front of Buck when he told them they were a couple.

Anyway, drinks start flowing, everything seems ok, but the cracks have formed (lbr, there were cracks in the relationship from the start and Tommy knew it - a cracked foundation doesn't mend on it's own, it just splits further asunder until someone takes the time to fix it). Tommy and Chim leave to go to some exclusive thing Tommy has booked for Chim. There is some noticeable unease between Tommy and Buck, but Tommy and Chim roll out too quickly for Buck to do anything about it (Tommy pointedly stealing another quick kiss from Buck before he leaves) and Eddie pulls Buck back into the club to have more fun. This is where Jonah snatches Chim - he tries to drug Tommy as well but doesn't give him a strong enough dose (or something), which is why Tommy is able to rescue Chim and get him to the hospital, then alert the wedding party. Jonah also drugs Buck and Eddie, who stay at the club. But we as the audience don't know that. And because of the uneasiness between Buck and Tommy before Tommy left, there's a sense of unease pervading the scenes of Buck and Eddie getting more and more out of control (maybe we also see Eddie not take a call from Marisol at the start of the night). It's just a montage of drunkenness, they invite a bunch of clubbers to their room and drink all of Chim's champagne, etc).

The point is, I wouldn't have them kiss in front of Tommy. If they did kiss at all, I might not even show it, because what we can imagine is almost always more exaggerated than what we actually see (both the audience and Tommy). The point would be to show the cracks in Buck and Tommy's relationship up against a backdrop of Buddie's closeness and let people think for themselves.

Then, the wedding. Tommy arrives as the big hero and gives Buck a big kiss in front of his family and friends, Vegas seemingly forgotten...except he's in his uniform. He's not staying at the wedding, he has a shift (Buck is left to wonder whether Tommy always had a shift at this time or if he purposefully took another shift after Vegas so that he had an excuse to jet early). Buck's family and friends don't notice anything amiss and congratulate/tease him good naturedly (Hen calls him "Evan" for the rest of the night, but with a warm smile on her face), all except for Eddie who is unusually quiet over with his Abuela. He tells her Buck already told him and asks her if she wants some cake. Abuela looks at him knowingly and makes one small comment that cuts right to the heart of the moment. I might also have her ask about Marisol and why Eddie didn't invite her. When he lies, she looks understanding. Then she would say something that would kick off Eddie's arc for the next two episodes (hopefully something about him coming to Texas).

Though, idk...I might have Tommy stay at the wedding after all and have Eddie leave early after watching Buck and Tommy cozy up to each other on the dance floor. I admit, my bias is towards jealous!Buck, but there needs to be balance. In my scenario, Tommy will have felt pushed out of the bachelor party by Eddie, so maybe that needs to be balanced out by Eddie feeling pushed out of the wedding by Tommy. Plus, that would allow for a parallel between the club dance scenes and the wedding dance scenes, one in drunken darkness with no friends or family present, the other sober and in the light with friends and family all around.

Then, at the end of the episode, maybe I'd show a clip of Buck in bed alone, looking through photobooth pictures and seeing one of him and Eddie kissing. And the look on his face says he remembers. Or maybe not, idk. I'm not overly fond of cheating and I don't know that Buddie necessarily need it to convince people - I think they can do that with body language alone.

[buddieroommatesera]

honestly i thought the same about eddie and marisol dating for 7 months. i saw people saying ‘she was barely in the episode so clearly she’s not important!’ but like….. she’s clearly already an established and normal part of his domestic life, so doesn’t need a big dramatic introduction, instead she got a casual ‘all you need to know is she’s in eddies house looking after his kid with him’

i will always clown about buddie canon and not to be a downer but i won’t lie, i’m worried about eddie and marisol as a couple. especially as edy’s instagram comment last night suggests she’s still filming

So I've been thinking about this more on timeline, and it may just be a technicality so hang with me :)

When Eddie calls Marisol, he's already healed up after the bridge collapse that happened in May. He broke his ribs, so I am putting that healing time at 6 weeks (really it would be like 2-3 months, but in the world of 9-1-1 everyone heals super quick lol). So they most likely went out around end of July, early August. Then probably became more serious a month later. So I will put their actual relationship length at about 4 months (maybe 5) when this season starts. Nova clarified that the season most likely does start in March (per what they've done prior), therapy being in January, so the original number stands: 6/7 months.

However, the interesting thing is that it is never mentioned or showed Eddie talking about the incident with Christopher with Marisol. Since she's already been introduced to him, my natural assumption would be to talk it out with a partner I'd hope to integrate into the family.

As far as the relationship itself lasting, I am not worried. They (TPTB) have repeated this same pattern of relationships with Buck and Eddie since the beginning. Concerning the actress, keep in mind, she's a vessel for the character. We are only interested in the character (I would hope). If she is a terrible human outside of what she portrays on TV, that is for the 9-1-1 team to worry about.

FOURTH WALL, PEOPLE!

You don't think they have social media managers keeping an eye on what is said online, not just by the fans, but the people they bring on the show? If there is action to be taken, they will, and/or they consider them to be such a non-entity that they sweep it under the rug until she's gone from the show. Very rarely do they (TPTB) take public action.

[saveahorserideaneddie]

🩺 or 🙅🏻‍♀️

Otherwise, I’m gonna start sharing anti-Eddie, pro-Tevan screenshots on your posts 😤

(I would never actually do that but pretty pretty please, these both sound SO FCKN GOOD, I need them 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺) (also I’m not at all creative & obviously very bad at threats but I wanted to follow the rules 😇)

That is legitimately the most threatening thing anyone could ever say to me to get me to write, please don't play with me like that, I promise I will have my wips written and on your desk by 5 PM Friday.

🩺 - The Nurse!Eddie fic:

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Eddie looked up at him with a raised eyebrow.

“You were crying over a movie with Dolly Parton in it?” he asked.

“Hey, don’t trash on Dolly,” Buck admonished. “Besides, she wasn’t the focus of the scene, it was- Sally Field’s character is giving this really emotional monologue and I just… it gets me every time.”

“You’re telling me you’ve cried at this scene before?” Eddie gave him an amused look.

“It gets to me, man,” Buck defended. “It- it’s kind of a sentimental movie to me. Maddie and I used to watch it all the time, and… I don’t know, I just love it.”

Eddie frowned at the mention of Maddie’s name.

“Ah, and how is she?” he asked, changing the subject. “Maddie, I mean.”

“Oh she’s…” Buck trailed off. “Don’t tell Hen, she wants it to be a surprise, but she is pregnant.”

“Congratulations,” Eddie said, trying not to let the agitated edge show.

“Thanks,” Buck smiled. “I think I’m honestly more excited than she is about it. To have a little Buckley walking around.”

Eddie’s brow furrowed. Based on what Buck had said in the store a week ago, the baby wasn’t his, so technically it wasn’t a Buckley.

“I’m sure that it’s going to be a big adjustment for you both,” Eddie said.

Buck shrugged his shoulders. “I mean, not really for me- I’m planning on spoiling the kid, but Maddie and Chimney are the ones who are gonna have the brunt of it all. I’m just gonna be Uncle Buck.”

Eddie swore he heard a record scratch in his brain.

“Wait, what?” he asked.

“What?” Buck furrowed his own brows in confusion.

“What do you mean, Uncle Buck?” he clarified.

“I mean, my sister’s baby is going to be my niece or nephew,” Buck chuckled awkwardly, still looking at Eddie with a confused look.

“Sister?” Eddie asked, his eyes growing wide. “Maddie’s- She’s your sister?”

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🙅🏻‍♀️ - The Homophobic Marisol fic:

“She what?” she practically hissed.

“I-” Buck stammered. “I- she figured out I had feelings for Eddie and she… she told me I should stay away from him and Christopher. That she’s Eddie’s girlfriend and she doesn’t want me around to mess things up for her.”

Buck could swear he saw the faintest twitch of Pepa’s eyes before she took a deep breath, closing her eyes and bowing her head as if in prayer.

“Dios, por favor dame la fuerza para no retorcerle el cuello a esa perra la próxima vez que la vea-” she muttered quickly under her breath.

“Pepa!” Buck’s eyes went wide- picking up on the gist of what she was saying even though he didn’t understand it exactly. 

“I’m sorry, Evanito, but I never liked that puta for my Eddito,” Pepa told him. “I knew there was something off about her when I met her, but I never expected her to be so vile.”

“I’m really wondering if I should tell you the next part,” Buck chuckled as Pepa turned to face him.

“There’s more?” she asked.

“She told me she didn’t want me to ‘turn Eddie’ so that he would be with me,” Buck told her- feeling like a weight was being lifted by sharing this with someone other than Maddie or Chim. “And that if she found out that I told anyone what she said then she would tell Eddie how I feel about him.”

“Ay dios mio,” Pepa shook her head.

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[sentientapple]

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