#and the post about how it's the solution to high modernism

[auren-zagarra]

I don't know if it would be possible considering how limited info wise we have of Malleus even after book 7 ending, but would it be possible to get an analysis of him?

Malleus Draconia: A Psychological Analysis

Disclaimer: Although this post is written by a professional psychologist, it is not intended to serve as a formal diagnosis. Rather, it is a character analysis of Malleus Draconia, created out of personal interest and passion for world-building. In psychological practice, accurate assessment should never be based solely on external observation.

Malleus Draconia is portrayed as powerful yet profoundly isolated. In canon, his aura and regal demeanor naturally intimidate others, so he seldom forms friendships beyond his guardian Lilia and a few like Silver and Sebek. In Book 7, Malleus' story reaches a breaking point: driven by intense anxiety about losing Lilia, he unleashes his signature magic to put the entire island into an enchanted slumber. He even proclaims a “wonderful future” in dreams - “Give in to slumber, and a thousand years will pass… you’ll become the protagonists of your own fairy tales” – rather than face reality. 

Personality

Malleus presents a study in contrasts. Outwardly he is aloof, reserved, and intensely formal. Descriptions emphasize that he speaks quietly and “doesn’t get too friendly,” even when conversing. His powerful, intimidating aura naturally pushes others away and most students avoid him, and even those who admire him (like Silver or Sebek) find it hard to approach. This suggests low extraversion and high conscientiousness: he is dutiful and poised, but he keeps an emotional distance.

Yet Malleus also has a naive, almost childlike side due to his sheltered upbringing. He grew up isolated in Briar Valley and was only recently exposed to technology and the outside world. As a result he often seems curious and earnest - even amazed by simple modern inventions - and can display genuine warmth once at ease. In short, Malleus embodies both a dignified presence and an innocent curiosity. Despite his fearsome reputation, he is shown to be kind and compassionate, with a strong sense of justice and a protective instinct for those he loves. Psychologically, his traits suggest high conscientiousness and openness (curiosity about new things) but also high neuroticism (anxiety about loss). In Erikson’s terms, Malleus appears to have a well-formed sense of identity and duty, but his extreme isolation implies difficulty with intimacy due isolation - since he struggles to form close bonds.

Coping Mechanism

Malleus copes with stress and loneliness through control, avoidance and fantasy. A telling example is his relationship with his virtual pet “Roaring Drago”: he repeatedly hatches and raises the pet to avoid accepting its limited lifespan. This repetitive behavior - a kind of perseveration on a beloved object - suggests denial of loss. More dramatically, when overwhelmed by Lilia’s declining health, Malleus resorts to his greatest power: he conjures a magical dreamscape to escape reality. He tries to solve his emotional crisis by controlling the world - rather than process grief or fear, he offers everyone a painless future in their dreams.

This reliance on magical or fantasized solutions is akin to Freud’s concept of denial and magical thinking. Malleus literally denies death and change by entering everyone into enchanted sleep. He tells his friends not to be “afraid” but to become “protagonists of your own fairy tales”, effectively encouraging them to live in a childlike fantasy rather than face real loss. In cognitive terms, this is a form of avoidance coping: instead of confronting painful emotions, he displaces the problem into an alternate reality. Bowlby’s Attachment Theory helps explain this: Malleus' anxious attachment (especially to Lilia) makes separation intolerable, so his coping is to fix the situation by force. In effect he behaves like a frightened child himself, using omnipotent-savior tactics. As the lore notes, this protective streak can be maladaptive: it drives him to extremes like the Book 7 slumber spell.

A Lonely Dragon

Malleus' life has been defined by solitude. From birth he knew little besides the company of Lilia. In fact, Lilia spent centuries chanting lullabies and telling him stories as he grew inside his egg. When he finally hatched, that support abruptly ended: “after hatching, Malleus was separated from Lilia, his only source of companionship”. His grandmother and tutors provided etiquette but no warm family environment.

Part of Malleus' loneliness stems from being rejected by others. His immense power and dragon heritage make him seem like a monster to classmates. This persistent social rejection - being feared or even hated - has become a self-fulfilling pattern. He expects that if he reaches out, people will flee, so he keeps distance. This is evident when even friendly students like Silver attempt to befriend him and still “fail to get closer”.

The long-term effect of this isolation is clear in the story. Malleus enjoys being alone, but the wiki explicitly notes he “shows signs of loneliness and a desire to connect”. He is socially inexperienced (often awkward with small children, for example) and emotionally inexperienced. Psychologically, extended solitude hindered his social development: he often acts more innocent or childish than his peers. According to Erik Erikson (I hate his name), lacking close relationships can stall a young adult in the Intimacy vs. Isolation stage; Malleus' narrative indeed portrays him as chronically alone despite craving connection. Bowlby would say that without consistent, responsive caregivers, he likely developed anxious attachment and a fear that others will inevitably leave. In practice, his long-time solitude has made him unusually self-reliant in some ways, but deeply vulnerable in others.

Repeated rejection likely fueled his defensive personality. Freud might interpret his regal aloofness as reaction formation - presenting a proud front opposite to any inner insecurity. Bowlby’s theory again applies: early experiences (his kingdom’s attack, being left in an egg) may have instilled a belief that relationships are unsafe. Psychologists might liken him to having an avoidant attachment style - he avoids intimacy to preempt the pain of being hurt. Over time, Malleus internalizes the stigma of being a “monster,” which may lower his self-esteem or drive perfectionistic safeguards. In short, being routinely shunned or feared has taught him to rely on himself, to the point that he nearly welcomes isolation as protection.

Sleep Well

In Book 7’s climax, Malleus casts a magic field of sleeping thorn vines, across Sage’s Island. Once the spell takes hold, every living creature falls asleep (except Malleus himself). He announces there is no need to be afraid, insisting that eternal slumber will grant everyone their heart’s desires. 

Psychologically, this mass-slumber is a dramatic case of denial and fantasy. Rather than face death or separation, Malleus creates a dreamscape where time (and pain) stops. He frames it as benevolent, invoking the bedtime stories Lilia told him as a child. In Freudian terms, he is using a childlike magical solution to an adult reality problem, a form of wish-fulfillment. From Erikson’s perspective on death and integrity, he refuses the natural cycle, trying to preserve a perfect world. Attachment theory would suggest this is a “protest” behavior in the extreme: instead of letting go, he forcibly tries to fix the situation for everyone.

This coping move also hints at possible delusional thinking: he genuinely believes the eternal-dream plan is a “wonderful future”. The narrative notes his fear, yet he willingly condemns everyone to an indefinite sleep to cope. In sum, by putting others to sleep, Malleus attempts to erase painful reality, illustrating the tragic extremes of his grief and denial.

Possible Diagnosis

His extreme anxiety over attachment suggests traits of a dependent or anxious attachment pattern. For example, his frantic declaration “Not losing you!” indicates panic at abandonment, reminiscent of Dependent Personality features (excessive need to be cared for, fears of separation). His tamagotchi behavior (refusing to let his virtual pet die) also shows compulsive attachment.

The Book 7 episode itself resembles an acute stress reaction or brief psychotic/mania-like episode. Casting a city-wide sleep charm and calmly rationalizing it could be viewed as a delusional coping mechanism. In DSM-5 terms, this might fall under an Adjustment Disorder with mixed disturbance of emotions and conduct (triggered by a known stressor, Lilia’s health). Some might even compare it to Borderline Personality (intense fear of abandonment, idealizing others, drastic emotional swings), though Malleus lacks the typical impulse behavior and identity disturbances of BPD.

Alternatively, one could see elements of trauma-related illness: he endured early-life trauma and this late crisis appears to be a pathological grief reaction. Malleus’ pattern - severe anxiety about loss, followed by an irrational, all-or-nothing solution - suggests an acute grief reaction or even acute stress disorder rather than a stable personality disorder. In any case, the DSM-5 would note his difficulty adjusting to the stress of possibly losing Lilia, manifested in extreme fantasy and avoidance (sleeping everyone). 

Autism?

Yes, it's possible to interpret Malleus as having traits consistent with autism spectrum disorder. That said, there are several behaviors and characteristics that align with known clinical features of ASD, especially in Level 1 presentations.

- Social Communication Differences

Difficulty forming peer relationships: Malleus is canonically described as being feared, avoided, or misunderstood by peers. Even though he wants to connect, few people approach him, and he often doesn’t know how to initiate or maintain typical peer interactions.

Unusual speech or tone: He uses formal, archaic speech that differs from his peers. While some of this is cultural (he’s royalty), it also makes him seem socially “out of sync.”

Struggles with understanding social nuance: Malleus sometimes misinterprets modern slang or jokes and needs others to explain things to him (e.g., technology or social situations). This could indicate challenges with pragmatic language or social inferences, a core trait of ASD.

- Restricted and Repetitive Behaviors or Interests

Special interests: Malleus is deeply interested in gargoyles, and he can talk about them in great detail. The way he focuses on this niche interest is consistent with the "circumscribed interests" often seen in autism.

Routine-oriented behavior: His repetitive habit of raising the same virtual pet (Roaring Drago) again and again could be seen as comforting repetition and difficulty with change or loss.

Literal thinking: He sometimes takes statements or metaphors literally, a trait common in autistic individuals who may struggle with abstract or figurative language.

- However, it’s important to note:

Malleus’s behavior may be explained entirely by his status: he’s royalty, raised in isolation, and feared due to magical power. His social awkwardness and speech may be cultural rather than neurological. 

His symptoms could also be interpreted as trauma responses and a lack of proper socialization. Yes, Chapter 7 could be seen as a meltdown, but it might just as well be his repressed emotions finally surfacing.

[ladythornofrivia]

Mr. Targaryen Will See You Now || (PT. 2)

Modern!Aemond x Reader (four parts)

warnings: (for the future chapters): sex, oral sex, loss of virginity, squirting, stalking, obsession, manipulation, reader being clueless, but not totally innocent, blackmail, p in v sex, blood kink, knife kink, gun kink, handcuff kink, bdsm, masturbation, fingering, cum play, tease, mommy issues.

a/n: now you’ve all been waiting for! Part 2! this time, the reader will be as his soon-to-be secretary. i went to the studio for a photoshoot. i won’t say why, but i’ll be announcing it around next year. stay tune for part 3.

You were thinking about him.

His offer.

It was the night where the decision made you toss and turn into your bed. A one chance in a lifetime, something that will change your life and status for good. Getting a steady job meant a steady source of income and societal actions in the higher system that Aemond Targaryen is in. Meaning challengers. Rules and expectations are higher, something that you’re not easy to strive to change pace or comfort zone. It wasn’t your ideal.

The source of all things common and strivers, you weren’t exactly the type to flip the switch on exact moment. A steady job in a steady life is enough. But what Aemond’s offered you says it all.

Risky.

Practical.

Stability.

Peace for bank account.

A high life devoid of privacy and self-recollection. A highly paced environment will not stop their time for you. You’re a slow turtle.

Your friend teased about how Aemond went stuck in your head. It wasn’t fair, at all. It wasn’t like Aemond ambushed you to say yes, but told you to contemplate of his proposal. How his gleaming violet hues pierced into your soul, begging and demanding all at once. The duality was simple enough for you to understand what kind of man he is.

A perfectionist.

Fumbling your mechanical pencil over and over as you studied the notes on your papers, stack after stack, followed by several energy drinks and stained coffee cups all over a once tidy desk. Horrifying as it sounds, you wished for a proper solution for a distraction to settle down permanently. Your friend hasn’t teased you for days, thank god for that, but you needed a second opinion.

But you didn’t want to call your parents because you chose to sever ties with them, not that anyone needs to know the detail, so you tried improvising a solution other than your friend or anyone else you know. You searched on Google, typing:

“How to make a right decision when some hot guy offered you a high-salary job?”, “How to relax after getting offered a job by a hot CEO?” “How to relax and forget for today after days of thinking about the CEO’s offer?”, “How to sleep properly after trying to distract yourself for days after the amount of torturous hours of endless teasing from a friend and a flashback?”

So far no answer came, just the ones where people often complain on the blog on how bosses are viciously toxic, others posted recordings of the bosses that eventually got fired, both boss and ex-worker. Some co-workers fucked the CEO all the way to the top, and others disposed others by any means necessary in a way of safety net.

Your head was reeling with ache and burn, as if someone crushed your skull and penetrated to a point where the pulse tightened, ready to implode. Spine landed back of your office chair, your head thrown back, mouth parted open and tired eyes closed, needing cold air. The break you took was finding your usual posture slouching and limping, as if you were floating in water. Your arms and back were shivering, and it felt good.

You hated wearing a damn big sweater. You thrashed, screamed for a short second, arms stretched and flung, hair tossed and turned, scrunchie loosened up. Then you were still, back to a limp form on a chair, not sitting like a proper lady with legs spread.

Staring at the white ceiling, you grumbled, “I can’t take this anymore.”

Maybe I should relax for now…too much caffeinated drinks doesn’t serve me enough purpose to stay focus on my final exams. Maybe a hottest shower would do the trick and forget my exams for now. And for tomorrow. Get a massage, and be naked for the night.

Thus, you stood up and left.

The phone rang.

Inwardly groaning, you read the number on your screen.

Unknown.

Eh, I’ll call in for the night.

Clicked your phone to silence, and hopped in naked into the shower. Or a bath that will make you fall asleep naked until the morning.

~~~

The phone rang three days later.

You fell asleep, not being as productive, laziness can be good once in a while.

But who the hell would try to call you first thing in the morning without a fresh cup of matcha latte as a today’s starter?

Yawning and stretching your limbs, cracking your spine, you did the best of your ability to be awake in the system. Relaxing and—

Shit.

I have 30 missed calls!!!!!

Who the hell keeps calling me?

It freaked you out, so you blocked the unknown caller.

A small sense of relief escaped from your parched lips. Drank a bottle of cold water to unwind the coils on your belly and went for a warm shower.

Days after break, you returned to your studies—after a long process of washing and scrubbing the mugs, thrown trashes of empty cans by the kitchen, and wiped surfaces on your desk. As a slow perfectionist, like art, it takes perfection. Not a crease or stain to see in plain sight. For the whole morning, with amount of lavender spray in the bedroom and replacement of new bedsheets from your sweat stain, and carpet vacuumed, everything must feel light and right. According to the website, changing bedsheets for every week. Not two weeks or three. Bacteria infested god knows what, you hated the idea of being sick. Even when sick, you still clean, but your friend insisted she’ll do the chores done in an instant, but you knew that your friend is efficient in her job, but she’s no expert with chores.

Lavender scent carried off on a cold air, you slumped back on the desk, starting over with a writing assignment from one class, chugging on a matcha latte, your phone vibrated.

An unknown number.

Again.

This time, you answered.

What could possibly go wrong?

Miss (Y/N).

“Hello,” you said, pausing. “Who’s this?”

“Have you thought about my offer?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand—you must have the wrong number.”

“You are wasting the benefit of my time and success, Miss (Y/N).”

Your spit choked back. “Sir—Mr. Targaryen. Yes, hello! How may I assist you?”

“Have you come to an important decision?”

“I’m sorry, sir. I’m still studying for my exams. I haven’t been able to sleep properly for days. I…” you paused again, treading the words wisely. “This is something I can’t miss. I have to graduate.”

You heard him sigh.

“There are no excuses, Miss (Y/N). It’s now or never.”

This time, you sighed, foot tapping in an uneven beat, boisterous and clumsy.

“I’ll give you another day to reconsider. But if you don’t answer my call, I’ll pass this offer to someone who will be more sufficient and quick in my service than you’ll ever be. I don’t think you’ll have what it takes to be in my company.”

Your heart leapt.

You bent forward, suspense caving in. “Ah, no, that’s not what I meant, sir—”

“I don’t think so. Not with your late response. I like my staff members to be as punctual, strictly on time. I could only excuse this once to those who are abnormally late. Anyone who shows up with punctuality meant they’ve got what it takes to be more potential regarding to future promotions.”

“I—First of all, how did you get this number?”

“We’ll meet again tonight around 9. Don’t silence your phone.”

And hang up without a second thought.

“What a fucking jackass,” you stated, and with anger rising, you took out on the scrubbing and dusting off furniture.

~~~

Hours later, you anticipated for the phone call, since you’ve done all the studying and cleaning without a hassle on being cranky—not a person disrupted you since your friend went out the whole day to god knows what she’s doing. Results concluded that a proper, lazy rest for three days has been helpful to late cranky hours.

Plopping on a couch with blank television staring back at your tired posture, you weren’t in the mood to watch romance or comedy, especially those characters who are acting like jerks at the first part. Maybe as a kid, you hated bad boys, when as a teen, you loved—you’re a die hard fan of bad boys, thanks to young adult romance novels. But as a grown woman, you’re unsure, but it’s clear-cut that you hated men who carried themselves in their attitude like a dumb child that’s required to be babied.

One man-child after another. It makes you think you wanted a flamethrower to burn, and eating boxes of truffles and a Starbucks drink, watching a whole building collapse to ashes.

The back of your head thumped onto the couch pillows, counting one to ten, more like counting sheep, but you knew it was a bad idea, so you ate heavy chunks of strawberry ice cream on a white ceramic bowl, thinking whether you should do a pros and cons list.

Shit, I made a total embarrassment of myself to a hot young CEO. Even when he did tell me to reconsider his proposal, there’s no way in hell he’ll promote me. Not with the plans I have, not with my delays. He’ll shoved it down on my throat by making me watch another lady settling a high score at the office, and him smirking at my direction. I had a feeling he wants me to be part of his company, it’s weird how he’s the first person—the first CEO—to beg for my existence and be part of a rescue team on his prestigious company. Almost like he’s been ready his whole life. No other CEO would do this; every CEO would think of middle class people as nobodies or a pile of trash. How did he get my number? I wish I know.

Wait, did I just say “hot”?

The phone rang, in a familiar tune.

Nearly tossing the bowl behind you, you settled on the coffee table and picked up the call.

“Miss (Y/N)?”

“Sir.”

“Have you come to make a decision?”

Good money, good pay, and peace for the bank account.

“I have.”

“Well?”

“What time should I be there for work?”

“8 AM. You’ll begin working here around 9.”

“Done.”

“I knew you’ll give in. Eventually.”

“Huh, persistent much?”

“Persistence is a good quality in a man.”

“Right.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a good night’s rest.”

“Good night.”

You hang up and screamed into the nearest pillow you find.

~~~

Months later….

It’s been forever since you were welcome into the company by the CEO himself. Long story short, you got accepted, without a process of long interview and long wait for phone calls for a confirmation. Easy does it. New office, drinking cups of coffee by the fancy coffee machine and water dispenser and a fridge with ingredients and proper food—not a TV dinner. Most are healthy quality.

But it came with a cost.

You were now under training and supervision of your new boss, who won’t stop staring at you. Clearly he was still fuming of the last interactions he attempted through your phone, labeled as Unknown.

You understood why it was an unknown number. Privacy is a top priority for someone who is known in a local news article online and on social media. Most pictures on social media were focused on the other side of his family, the only time Aemond’s shown in the pictures was blurry.

The usual routine has routine, but one remained the same. You always tied your hair to an updo with a scrunchie.

Stacking and organizing the files and binders by name and number in order, after dusting off of his shelf and toss the useless files on a shredder machine. Whirring on the machine has gotten louder, but didn’t ease your anxiety from his ever watchful eyes. His nose somewhat flaring, and his hands kept opening and closing, attempting to stay tranquil by touching the fabric on his pants, sometimes the items on his large desk.

Aemond kept staring at you for as long as he could and you found yourself at a most vulnerable position. Everything was a mess, but thankfully all of his files are on his computer, including your laptop and Bluetooth headset and ergonomic pens, solely provided by the company, as you play fetch with the CEO, playing his do’s and don’t’s.

Day by day, each time you clocked into work mode, Aemond’s presence drew near. As if he was critiquing you through gaze.

“Why is Aemond staring at you? Have you done something to piss him off?” your co-worker asked.

“I had no clue. Is he always like this?”

“His face usually scowls to everyone, but he’s staring at you without blinking. Kinda freaks me out. Gives me the hibbie-jibbies.”

“Yeah, no shit,” you said in silence, knowing he has sharp ears he might fire you on the spot.

“Like he could hear us.”

“Shh! Would you keep it down!?”

“Anyway, I have to go. Oh, and, Mr. Targaryen wants to see you.”

The thing was, he always wanted to see you.

The past conversation went away as you tried to focus on the present.

Turning back again, and gathered the files Aemond needed for the next appointment. He didn’t need to go at the meeting. If he simply wanted to go, he would, but everything is convenient with advanced technology, online meetings have been a thing for today’s world. If he does want to show up at a mundane event, he would’ve done in a flash, and all eyes would be on him.

“Here are the papers that you requested, sir,” you uttered, low lashes fluttered towards him, hoping to release you from his sky-high office.

“This should be easy to handle with the indulgences of the client I’m working with. Awful man needs to be settled immediately.”

He flicked his wrist.

The screen on his computer brightened with an annoying tune. And deep, distorted voice on the other side of the screen.

You could only offer a short nod, not knowing what he meant. So you bowed and exited.

Finally free.

Without the dark hours, you were the only one left, aside from a janitor and couple security guards roaming the building to dismiss anyone who’s still resided at the office. The office hours are usually closed at 7:30 PM. But for this month, the boss’s notified the staff that they’re off around 5 PM. Aemond’s had been testing the work hours, based on New Zealand with a total of 6 hours of work instead of a regular 9-5. But not for the CEO.

There’s no rest for the wicked.

Finally, at the coffee lounge and a cafeteria, the last member of the cooking staff gave you two packs of cherry cheese danish and an empty cup for a caramelized coffee by the coffee machine standing nearby. You haven’t ate since the moment you stepped in at work. You were in the rush. Stomach twisted in pain now loosened from a good chunk of appetite stuffed into the mouth.

Sat by the ceramic bench, you hummed in delight, feeling like a warm hug, with a touch of caramelized coffee with cream powder. You haven’t had a good break since you were stuck in the room with him. A good coffee weighs the heaviness on your shoulders.

Suffocating.

With that, you emptied the food in your stomach and threw the cup and brown packets in the trash bin, and leaving the tray on top, striding forward to head back and grab your belongings and call it for tonight.

With a quiet office, all surrounded by sturdy walls and soundproof glass, you managed to relax, determined to go home.

The door shut in.

You turned and spotted Aemond locking the door.

“Sir,” you uttered, in question.

Without warning, he pinned you down on desk with a knife close to your face, the pointed end nearly touching your eye.

You screamed, but silenced you with a kiss.

Your first kiss.

“Don’t say a word,” he snarled.

And with the knife he held against your face, his hot breath tickled your face.

“You wouldn’t want to say a word to anyone, would you?”

Frightened, you shook your head. Laying still as if you’re trying to please him in a way to leave you alone.

He hadn’t inched away; knife on his hand slithered its tip across your skin, leaving your staggered, breath held captive, watching his blank and unsteady focus drinking it all in. The knife pinched your skin; Aemond slashed the black stockings in one swoop. Then, his knife went his way inside the ripped skirt he torn off, your pink thongs displayed before him.

You wanted to kick him, but he made sure to keep you still.

Rip!

The panties torn apart cleanly, your wet cunt displayed. It was a nightmare. Blush fell onto your cheeks as you watched him knelt down, still pinning you down, he licked your parted folds, lapped his warm tongue in three deep strokes.

By then, your cunt squirted shortly.

And he found it amusing.

“Be a good secretary,” he said, and plunged the hilt of the knife inside you.

Your moans escaped but Aemond kissed your lips, you could taste yourself in his lips, still in shock and denial that your lips could barely move.

Terror flooded within you; his hand bloodied as he inserted the knife’s hilt inside, urging your desperate, clinging cunt, growing warmer, tighter, coiled to a tight flex, oozing and flowing. You never had proper sex.

The knife has taken your virginity.

“Stop~” you uttered breath ragged breaths, nearly bucking your hips, cunt yearning.

Aemond denied, attempted to go faster, and the dark hilt of the knife pinched your walls right. The flush of hot squirt splashed on his uniform, even yours. Humiliating as it was, at least you’re somewhat thankful that it wasn’t his cock.

How long has he wanted this?

“Sir, please stop—”

“I will stop when I wanted to stop, Miss (Y/N). You’re going to love this. Whether you like it or not.” He unzipped his pants with one hand while his other pinned your hands above your head and stroke himself in front of your exhausted state. You couldn’t object anymore. His climax is about to reach, and his hot cum exploded, splashing everywhere on your skin. Even your face. His ragged breath overtook the silence, and left you defenseless. Letting your wrists go.

Everything was hot inside your private office.

“Fuck,” he moaned, eyes closed.

It felt right for him.

Seeing you all bruised and bloodied up. The hilt of the knife he held on his bloody hand—from the gripping the sharp end—it was a mix of your cum and blood, from tightening its grip.

Then he zipped his pants up, and left you cold on the table, saying, “Make sure no one sees you, Miss (Y/N). And if you mention this to anyone, I’ll kill you.”

His hand yanked the scrunchie out of your hair, some hair stands plucked, leaving your lips a soft yelp.

Then the door slammed shut.

Hollow. And emptiness.

Only your cries filled the stained and wrecked office, wondering how it went wrong, wondering how you can still breathe. The scars on your thigh wasn’t deep, but needs medicine and a clean shower, and a long rest. From there, you contemplate without hesitation. Your heart ached from shock and distress, a feeling where you wanted to throw up all the good food you ate earlier, but it was no use.

Perhaps you made a mistake on taking his offer.

~~~

As for Aemond, it was the first part of his plan. The red bruises on your wrist and absolution on your skin, laced in dark and wet crimson, from a torn underwear and stockings, the rush stirred in his veins and heart. And thus, more games he plans to pursue, seeing if you could withstand and beyond.

Somewhere in his head, the voice came in again. He wanted it to go away. The blood on his hand went cold, stinging from gripping the blade so tightly when he forced the hilt inside her warmth.

In the midst of stopping, he snapped his neck. In anger, he didn’t want to hear that voice again.

It’s about damn time he found a new toy to play with.

With a scrunchie he confiscated from you, yanked it away, as he went to the nearest elevator, reaching to his office, rushing to his chair to undo his pants once more and wrapped your scrunchy in several movements, until he became undone with his pleasure. He didn’t care of his staff coming in. But nobody entered. The staff went home and no one could hear Aemond’s throaty pleasure emanating.

The fainted smell of flowers on the scrunchy and his cum and blood from his injured right hand intertwined, as he sniffed it.

Divine and innocence.

Just the way he liked it.

reblogs/comments are greatly appreciated 🌹

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[thydungeongal]

Was seeing ur posts about D&D allowing romance to happen but not actively supporting it. I'd argue that D&D is a hindrance when trying to use its mechanics and framework for romance. Many players link romance to charisma and charisma rolls. What does it mean to seduce someone or be romantically involved with someone when romance hinges almost entirely on your numerical bonus exceeding their difficulty number? What does it mean that charisma is something that some people just have and some people don't? (especially in like older 5e when races gave you different charisma modifiers) Slapping romance onto a system of numerical hierarchy in the way you would anything else in D&D portrays romance in a shallow almost incel-adjacent way imo

Mmm yeah, modern editions of D&D are definitely of the variety of loading your dice with big numbers and then hoping your dice wins the opposition. It's ultimately a mechanical framework built around conflict and treating everything as an obstacle to be overcome, and that's also how character growth works in the game. That kind of framework sort of automatically turns romance into a challenge where you smash numbers against it in the hopes that it overcomes the obstacle number and. Yeah, it's not a great framework for modeling romance.

Ultimately though I'm not quite sure what the solution is. Monsterhearts kind of has limited stat growth, and romance and intimacy go deeper than just "you rolled high enough to have the romance. And now nothing happens." But in a challenge game like D&D if there is to be integration of romance into the game it would work best if actually integrated into the core gameplay: like, the perfect harmony of dungeoning and elf-kissing is achievable through bonuses from elf-kissing to dungeoning.

[lees-chaotic-brain]

swapped! (todoroki x reader)

summary: after you get hit with a strange quirk, you swap bodies with your long time crush and hero partner todoroki shouto. somehow, every single thing that could possibly go wrong goes wrong and chaos ensues. idea dump here

genre/content warnings: afab reader, reader has some sort of telekinesis quirk for plot efficiency (i got lazy sorry), suggestive, periods, reader is implied to have a heavy flow but it's really just for the plot to ensure maximal crack, mentions of blood, swearing, fluff, crack, todoroki is a little shit (when is he not)

wc: 5.9k (oopsies this is my longest fic to date)

note: this is for @andypantsx3's pretty boy summer collab! (sorry it's late andie) it is also one of my sponsored fics for @ficsforgaza's fundraiser! i couldn't fit all the scenes i wanted into the fic without ruining the flow, so go check them out and sponsor them if you want to read more! also everyone needs to go say thank you to @thelov3lybookworm for giving me the push i needed to stop making excuses and find solutions so i could post. thanks girl <3

i'm not sure how i feel about the ending, but i think it's as good as it's going to get! since i haven't written in a little while and things have been tough, likes, reblogs, and comments would be so so appreciated, and will help me get the next fic on my list done faster!!!

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The first thing you notice when you finally emerge from the depths of your slumber is how comfortable you were. Everything feels just right, your pillows are cool against your neck, and your sheets hold the perfect amount of warmth; enough to keep you cozy, but not so hot that your sweat is creasing the silky sheets and making you feel sticky and gross.

The second thing you notice is the very large, very male hand sprawled on the pillow next to your head. A deep male voice lets out a surprised cry as you jerk back, the hand moving with you.. It takes you several moments to realize that it had come from you. 

Your bare feet thump against the wood paneled floor as you stumble out of bed disoriented and realize where you are for the first time. Namely, not in your bedroom.

Glancing around in confusion, you wonder what the hell happened, and how you ended up somewhere so nice.. The space itself is fairly bare, but you can tell that all of the furniture inhabiting it is expensive. From the sleek wooden dresser to the geometric modern light fixtures to the insanely high thread count of the sheets, everything screams tasteful luxury. 

Where are you? You definitely feel asleep in your own bedroom. Reaching up you rake your hair out of your face and freeze. Instead of the familiar texture and length of your own hair, you’re greeted with short, silky soft strands that definitely did not belong to you.

Mussing your hair to make sure you’re not imagining things, you glance down, and for the first time notice some inexplicable things.For one, the ground is a lot farther away than it normally is, and for two, last time you checked you did not have washboard abs, or a male anatomy.

The entire situation was confusing, and you were still slightly sleep-addled. Despite that you knew that you needed to find a mirror. A quick glance around the room located one in the corner and you hurry over to it. 

Sliding to a stop you grip the edges of the little stand, frost spreading from your right hand to cover the wood while you gaped at your appearance.

Intense heterochromatic eyes stared back at you, shock filling them. Your hair was a unique mess of red and white strands, the two colors mussed with sleep. With those distinctive features, plus high chiseled cheekbones, a jawline that could cut stone and a slim yet unfairly muscular body there was no doubt about it.

You were Todoroki Shouto. At least, that’s whose body you’re currently inhabiting. His very shirtless body. 

BZZZZZT BZZZZZZT

Saved from having to fight your urges to poke at his abs by the noise, you jump, swinging your gaze around in search of the origin.

BZZZZZZT BZZZZZZT

A simple black phone flashes on the otherwise empty nightstand (does he seriously not even have a lamp??), the caller i.d. sending you scrambling across the room to the phone. 

Fumbling in your haste, you manage to swipe and pick up the incoming call from your cell phone.

Your mind is racing a mile a minute. There were only two ways to get into your phone. The first was the password, but even you forgot it most of the time. It sat safely tucked away on a post it in the safe you store all of your important documents in. The second was through face i.d. and the only person who could unlock your phone with their face was you. And since you were in his body, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to assume that he….Lifting the phone to your ear you speak hesitantly.

“Todoroki? Is that you?”

“Y/N?”

It was unnerving to hear your voice saying your name from the other end of the phone,

“What happened?!” You’re a little mortified to hear the hysteria lacing your words, but you can feel the panicked adrenaline flooding your veins as your body goes into fight or flight.

“I believe that the quirk we got hit with yesterday caused us to switch bodies. However, it is highly unlikely that it is permanent so it will be fine.” Even though it’s your voice, something about knowing Todoroki is on the other end was reassuring enough that some of the tension bled from your shoulders.

“That’s good.” You sigh, rubbing your face. There’s a mildly uncomfortable throbbing coming from your lower half, and you absentmindedly reach down to rub at it, forgetting you weren’t in your own body. Brushing against a bump in your gray sweatpants, you shiver as a familiar feeling spreads through your lower stomach and something twitches.

“Todoroki?” Your voice suddenly gets a little higher, the hint of hysteria from before returning to the normally deep monotone. “We have a problem.”

“What is it? Is something wrong?” 

Ignoring his questions, you stare in growing horror at the very obvious tent in the front of the sweatpants you were wearing. You have no idea how you didn’t notice it earlier, but now that you’ve seen what’s going on down there you can’t help but be extremely aware of the uncomfortable pressure. 

“Y/N? Please explain what’s going on. I’m growing concerned.”

“I-” You splutter, unable to form a coherent sentence. Finally you gather your wits enough to say something. “It’s uh, it’s hard.”

“What do you mean? What’s hard? Oh...” He trails off into embarrassed silence.

“OH?” You can’t handle this. “What do you mean ‘oh?!’ Do something!”

“Like what?” He sounds a little defensive. “What am I supposed to do from here?”

“I don’t know!” You’re shouting now. “But you have to do something! How am I supposed to sit here with your massive boner?!”

There’s a loud crash on the other end of the phone, and you jump. “What was that?”

“Nothing.” He answers a little too quickly, but his voice still retains his usual impassivity. “Anyways, returning to the problem at hand. It will go away on its own after a little while. Unless you would rather handle it yourself-”

“No!” You wince as you practically shout into the phone. “I mean, no it's okay. I feel like that would be unprofessional.”

You can hear the amusement in his voice as he responds. “I feel like this entire situation is rather unprofessional. After all, I did see your breasts this morning.”

There must be something wrong with your hearing because there’s no way he just said what you thought he did. In such a nonchalant manner at that. “Wha-What?” Embarrassingly your voice cracks as you rack your brain, frantically searching through your memories of the night before. Then it hits you. 

“You went to bed without pants, a shirt, and a bra last night.” He informs you matter of factly, and you must be going crazy because there’s no way that that’s smugness you’re picking up from him. “Judging from the temperature of your apartment I’d say that your air conditioning is broken. You should probably get that fixed.”

You’ve completely forgotten about the boner you’re currently sporting due to the mortification of it all. Of course the one time the two of you switch bodies it just has to be the day your AC broke and you went to bed in nothing but a pair of striped cotton undies.

A small part of you mourns that you weren’t wearing something sexier, but the larger part of you is screaming that he is your boss. Sure you’ve been friends for years, and you have a not so little crush on him, but you are his subordinate. This was going to make things so awkward in the office. Hopefully once this is all over you can go hunt someone with a memory erasing quirk down to wipe his mind. But maybe not yours. You kind of want to remember the toned planes of his abs and the impressive bulge in his sweats. 

Giving yourself a shake you chastise your internal voice. Absolutely not. That would be an invasion of his privacy. In fact, you should put on a shirt right this second to respect his privacy, not that he didn’t walk around with half of his hero suit burned off from time to time. Wait. A thought suddenly occurs to you.

“Wait. You have a shirt on now, right? You put on a shirt before calling me.” You laugh nervously, because of course he has more common sense than that. It’s not like he would just sit on the phone with you while your tits were hanging out, right? Right??

“Well no.” Your heart falls out of your ass and you accidentally sear a handprint into the edge of his nightstand at his casual answer. “It’s uncomfortably warm in here and without the use of my quirk I am unable to regulate my body's temperature. Aside from that, I don’t know where you keep your shirts so I prioritized calling you to discuss the situation over going through your personal belongings.

That all sounds perfectly reasonable and you would have fallen for it except for one little thing. “Todoroki. I know for a fact that I was too lazy to put my laundry away yesterday and there is a stack of clean t-shirts sitting on the end of my bed right now.” 

You hear rustling -is he still in your bed?!- as he leans forwards to check. “Oh. You’re correct. My apologies.” There’s more rustling and the sound of fabric sliding over skin as he pulls a t-shirt over his head. “It’s on now.”

“Thank you.” You pointedly ignore the fact that he did not sound the tiniest bit apologetic, filing it away to revisit later. For now, the two of you need to discuss what to do next. “I appreciate it. What’s the plan now though? I think we should meet at the agency as soon as possible and go from there.” 

“I agree.” He seems to lack the sense of urgency currently consuming you as he hums in agreement. It’s incredibly annoying. “We should probably give each other directions on what to do, and where to find the things we need.”

On second thought maybe it’s better that he’s calm and thinking clearly because that was an excellent idea. “That’s smart. I keep a pad of paper and a pen on my nightstand to jot down reminders if you want to use that. Where do you keep your paper?”

“Check my bookshelf.” The telltale sound of paper flipping told you that he found the notepad as you crossed the room and stopped in front of the simple wooden bookcase. “Where is it on your bookshelf?”

“I think I keep a notebook and a pad of paper on the middle shelf.” He sounds distracted and a little uncertain, but when you stoop down to check (it’s weird being this tall) you find a simple yellow legal pad and a black pen. “I got it.” 

“Okay.” The sound of a book closing accompanies his words and there’s a hint of some unidentifiable emotion lacing the two-syllables. 

Not thinking much of it you shrug it off, sitting down down at his desk and listening as he tells you where keeps his car keys, hero suit, and other necessities. You ask a few follow up questions, jotting down what cabinet he keeps his cologne and deodorant in, before launching into your own instructions.

“The first thing you need to do is start the coffee machine. Trust me. My body will not be happy unless you give it at least three cups of coffee or like two big energy drinks before 9 am. Next…” After you’re sure he has understood the importance of caffeine, you move on, explaining where you keep your clothes, car keys, and shoes, as well as where you parked your car. 

“Don’t worry about makeup or hair products or anything while you’re getting me ready. I know there’s a lot on my bathroom counter but it’s not necessary. But you do need to go into the first drawer on your left when you’re standing at the sink and grab my anxiety meds. They should be in an orange prescription bottle. Only take one. And please for the love of god do not forget to put a bra on. You got all that?”

“I believe so. Is there a specific outfit you want me to wear or should I just choose?” You stop and think. Left to his own devices there’s no knowing what he might put you in (his first hero costume proof of his abysmal sense of fashion) so it would be best to give him some guidance. “Could you just wear a casual sweater and some jeans?” 

“Yes. Let’s get ready and meet at the agency in about an hour. If that works for you.” There’s not much writing on the yellow legal pad, the black scrawl of your handwriting barely taking up half a page. Okay. It isn’t that much. You can do this. “That sounds good to me.”

“Oh, I also think it might be best if we kept this from the general employees at the agency for the time being just to reduce drama. Is that okay with you?” 

“Of course.” More than okay actually. Some of them were aware of your not-so-little crush on him, so it would spare you some teasing and interrogation.

There’s a couple seconds of awkward silence, and you get the feeling he wants to say something more, the tension crackling through the speaker of his stupidly expensive phone. Opening your mouth, you start to say something then realize you don’t really have anything to say. The awkward silence persists a couple seconds longer before he wishes you goodbye and hangs up.

Click. Click. Click. Clickclickclickclickclickclickclick. You didn’t even realize that you had started clicking the pen open and closed, a nervous habit of yours. Sheepishly you place the pen down on his desk and stand. Sure the vibes were kind of weird at the end there, but it’s not like anything worth making you nervous happened. The situation might not be ideal, but it wasn’t the biggest deal in the world. You could handle it. The worst part was already over. You just had to meet him at the agency, figure out what to do with the rest of the day, and wake up in your own body tomorrow. Piece of cake.

Gaping in horror, you realize that this was not, in fact, going to be a piece of cake. 

Getting ready had been easy enough so you had arrived at the agency a few minutes before your agreed meeting time, which fortunately/unfortunately put you in the perfect position to witness the walking shitshow.

You had been idly sipping at a cup of coffee, marveling at how many packets of sugar it had taken to make it acceptable to his taste buds when he staggered in, catching the eye of pretty much everyone in the lobby.

Hunched over weirdly, he staggered in, wearing a pair of jeans that rode just a little too low to be professional and a very white, very sheer shirt that was meant to be layered over an undershirt. Or, at the very least, with a sturdy, modest bra underneath.

Alas, you can only stare in abject horror at the sight of what everyone else would assume was you stumbling in, your nipples visible from across the room, the bra that should have been on your body clasped in one hand. 

You’re pretty sure you disassociated for a few seconds from sheer mortification, standing there unmoving for several seconds. Once you had processed (and gone through the seven stages of grief multiple times) you were bolting across the floor, seizing his (your?) arm and dragging him down the hall and into the family bathroom where no one could see.

Slamming the door shut behind you, you shove Todoroki/yourself into the small space, wincing as you watch him stumble in your body. Did you always seem this weak and small in his eyes? The sound of the lock clicking as you shut the door reminds you of the current situation and you turn on him, rage emanating from every pore of your being.

“I. Thought. I. Told. You. To. Put. On. A. Bra.” You’re hurt, and seriously pissed off, neatly trimmed nails digging into your thighs as you grip your pants. Humiliation courses through your body, pulsing behind your eyes in tears that you will not let fall, no matter what. “Is this some kind of joke? Are you trying to embarrass me-”

“No.” It’s disconcerting watching yourself speak and move, but subtle mannerisms remind you that it’s Todoroki you’re looking at, not yourself in the mirror. “I wouldn’t do that to you, I swear.”

“Then what is this?” You wave your hand at your body, flinching at what others must be whispering about you. “Do you want people to think I’m some sort of crazy person who goes around practically flashing people at their workplace? Someone who has no sense of decency?”

“Of course not.” His tone is as even as ever, but you can tell that he feels bad. “People here know what type of person you are. I’m sure they’re more concerned than anything.”

The fabric of his blue hero suit unscrunches as your hands drop to your sides, chest heaving as you take a deep breath. “I hope so.”

There’s vulnerability in your voice, and for a second you find peace in the quiet of the moment before he ruins it. “Besides, I’m more worried about my reputation than yours right now.”

You look up indignantly. “Why? I did everything you asked, and I’m fully dressed so I’m not sure why you’re complaining.”

He winces as your voice raises (maybe the coffee hasn’t kicked in yet) but he hides it quickly. “I mean, from their point of view, they just watched me forcibly drag my subordinate off and locked myself in a bathroom with her. They probably have all sorts of unseemly ideas about what I’m doing right now.”

You freeze. Shit. You hadn’t even considered what it would look like to the others. “I’m so sorry. We can explain this to everyone. Like you told me, everyone here also knows you, and that you would never do anything inappropriate.” 

“It’s fine.” He gives you a genuine, yet slightly strained smile. “I’m not too concerned. However, your body doesn’t feel great.”

‘What’s wrong?” You reach out and touch his forehead. “You don’t have a fever.” Glancing down, you sigh. “First things first let's make you decent. You literally brought the bra. Why aren’t you wearing it?”

“The best way I can describe it is it’s similar to the time I accidentally ate Bakugou’s extra spicy curry, except it’s not in my stomach. It’s more in my abdomen. And I meant to wear it, I just couldn’t figure out how to get it on.”

“Okay. I can help with that.” You motion for him to lift his arms. “Take off your shirt.”

He lifts an eyebrow. “Is now really the time?” The bathroom is silent as you give him a death look. “It’s my body. There is quite literally nothing about the body you are currently inhabiting that I do not already know about. Now, shirt. I’ll help put the bra on.”

Understanding that you were not in the mood, he hurriedly pulls the shirt off, and you’re presented with the sight of your bare torso. Ignoring the strange intimacy of the moment (it was literally your own body you had no idea why you felt weird) you help him slip his arms into the straps, then motion for him to turn around. 

He complies, and that’s when you see it. The relatively small, but somewhat noticeable stain on your crotch in the back of your pants. That’s why he wasn’t feeling good. Your body started your period.

The clasp of the bra dangles in your hands as you stare at it, evaluating your choices. One. You could pretend like nothing is happening but chances are he’s going to have to pee at some point during the day so he’ll find out eventually. Plus the stain wasn’t small.

Two. Be the mature, rational adult you are and calmly explain the situation. After all, there was nothing to be ashamed of. It’s a perfectly normal, perfectly natural, biological function that comes with being a female.

And three. Just leave and go crawl into your bed until this nightmare is over. Let him deal with it himself. 

Option number three was looking pretty good there for a moment and you were calculating how fast you could escape the agency without drawing attention when Todoroki spoke. 

“Everything okay? Why aren’t you doing the hook things?” Snapping out of your trance, you clumsily clasp the back, taking several tries to get all the hooks in the same row. Patting it, you tell him to put the shirt back on before taking a deep breath. “Hey, Todoroki?”

Wisps of hair emerge from the neckline of your shirt, followed closely by your head as he pops into your shirt. “Yes?”

“So like, it’s going to be okay and I swear I’ll help you and I’m sorry you have to deal with this but please whatever you do, don’t freak out. Promise?” He tilts his head slightly, regarding you with confusion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but if you say it’ll be okay I don’t see why I would feel the need to freak out.”

His calm response puts you somewhat at ease, and you just rip the bandaid off. “My body just started it’s period. With you in it. That’s why your abdomen was hurting. It was period cramps. Don’t worry, I’ll get you some advil soon. There’s a small stain on the back of your pants, but it’s not bad yet. However, it’s really heavy on my first day so we’re going to need to get a tampon in and a pad on asap.”

A blank stare is your only response. “What…is a tampon? And what does heavy mean? Also, does it always hurt this bad?” A small furrow appears between his brows, and you can tell he’s overthinking.

“Normally it’s only this bad for a few days, but I’m used to it by now.” You reassure him, grabbing a tampon and pad from the free dispenser on the wall. “And to answer your question, a tampon is basically a fancy roll of material that goes up there and absorbs the blood.”

You’re doing your best to remain calm and unbothered on the outside, but on the inside you’re losing your mind because there was absolutely no way that you were about to teach your crush how to insert a tampon into your cooch because you managed to swap bodies on the worst possible day.

He looks at you pensively as you approach him with the hygiene products. “Okay. What do you want me to do?”

You pause, considering. How did you want to do this? It would be weird for you to put it in yourself, even if it was your body. The packaging crinkles in your hands as you turn the items over in your hand. The easiest route would be to have him just put the pad on, but you also didn’t want him to deal with the mess and discomfort of sitting in a pad. 

“Alright.” You clap your hands, the sharp sound echoing off the clean linoleum floors. “We’ll get a pad on first, then we’ll try the tampon. Ready?”

“Yes. How do I do that?” Okay. You can explain this. It’s not that complicated. “First things first, pull down your pants and underwear and sit on the toilet.”

A rustle of clothing and the click of the toilet seat against the porcelain bowl told you he had complied. “Wait, but like, don’t look okay. Keep your eyes averted.”

“Understood.” You choose to ignore the amusement in his voice, instead grabbing another pad and giving him a demo. Feeling guilty about the waste, you rip open one of the packages and pull out the pad. It’s thick, and made of cheap material like all free pads in public bathrooms tended to be.

Holding it up so he can see you demonstrate peeling the tab and unfolding it before peeling the sticky back off and showing it to him. 

“Basically you just have to remove the covering and stick it to the bottom of your underwear. Make sense?”

He nods, so you pass him the pad and watch him carefully peel back the appropriate backings and smooth it into the center of your panties. His eyes gleam at you hopefully as he looks up, and when you tell him he did a good job you could have sworn he preened. 

“Good job Todoroki.” A subtle frown pulls at his lips. “So for the tampon-”

“Shouto.” He cuts you off, looking disgruntled. “Call me Shouto.”

“I-What?” Thrown off guard by the sudden demand request you blink at him. “I don’t see how that’s relevant to what’s going on right now, but you’re my boss. It doesn’t seem right for me to address you so casually.”

“But you call me Shouto while we’re at work.” He stubbornly refuses to give the point up, clinging to it like a dog with their chew toy. “How is it any different?”

“Because-” You give him an exasperated look. “Some idiot decided to make his hero name his first name, so when he’s at work his co-workers are forced to use it. I don’t call you Shouto as in Todoroki Shouto. I call you Shouto as in Pro-Hero Shouto. That’s the difference.”

“But we’ve known each other for years.” He’s very matter of fact, clearly missing the point. “I would say we’re close enough for first names.”

He’s unbelievable. Of all the things to focus on right now why on earth is he choosing to argue over how you address him? “Of course we’re close. I consider you a good friend. But I wouldn’t say we’re close enough where it’s appropriate for me to address you by your first name when you’re my boss.”

“I’m currently in a bathroom with you right now, in your body, sitting on a toilet with no pants, on your period. I don’t see how we can possibly get any closer.” He had a point, and you just wanted to get this whole disaster sorted out as quickly as possible so you conceded. “Fine. Shouto. Now, will you please listen to me so we can get this over with and go on with our day?”

Using demonstrative hand motions and trying not to show how flustered you were you explained how to put the tampon in. Finally you finish, and hand him a tampon. He unwraps it, then hunches over in an awkward position trying to see what he was doing.

A red flush crawls up your neck as he quite literally examines your pussy, your insecurities running rampant, thoughts you’ve never had before occurring. Like, what if it looks weird? You didn’t exactly have a huge frame of reference, and all of your past experiences were horny hookups so you literally had no idea what it looked like from his point of view. He was probably repulsed by it. If everything that already happened hadn’t ruined any chance you had with him this was the final nail in the coffin.

A quiet splash cuts through the silence of the bathroom, interrupting your downward spiral. Looking up, you lock eyes with Todoroki, who’s frozen guiltily on the toilet.

“What just happened?”

“I, er, well I’m not sure.” Your eyes narrow. “What was the splash?”

“I did my best.” He sounds defensive. “I had a hard time finding…it…and it’s not easy to line it up and I think I did it wrong because as soon as I put it in it kind of just…spat it back out?”

Gaping at him, you’re at a loss for words before a loud, unflattering cackle rips itself out of your chest. The self-consciousness caused by the strangeness of the moment and being in the presence of your crush fading away as you reverted to treating him like you did in high school.

“Oh-Oh my god!” You’re doubled over, almost crying with how hard you’re laughing. “You can’t find it. You can’t even find the hole. You must be so popular with the ladies.”

As you laugh, a strange sensation builds in your stomach, and next thing you know it feels like you’re getting sucked into a vacuum and shot out the other end. Your vision goes black and fuzzy, the fluorescent lighting of the bathroom hurting your eyes when you finally open them.

When you finally open them and find yourself staring into the unimpressed face of one Todoroki Shouto that is. 

Seeing his face again instead of staring at yours is a relief, but it’s also unfortunate because now you are the one perched on the toilet, your pants hanging around your ankles and a tampon floating around in the toilet water beneath you. 

The two of you lock eyes, and you realize that now you’ve both returned to your own bodies it’s even worse that he’s seeing you half naked (don’t ask you why it just is somehow. Maybe it has something to do with him seeing it from his point of view instead of yours?). 

Embarrassment floods your face, and you yell at him to turn around, hurriedly grabbing another tampon and putting it in before using your quirk to retrieve the tampon from the toilet and dumping it into the trash. A rushed tug has your pants back on, and the two of you stand in the bathroom not moving or speaking. Finally you break the silence.

“Uh, well, anyways. I’m glad this all worked out, sorry for the inconvenience and how weird it was. I’m going to head home and enjoy my day off now. Have a nice day!”

Not giving him the chance to respond, you dart past him and out the door, ignoring him as he calls your name. Yeah right. Have a nice day? More like have a nice life. There was no way you could ever show your face around him again. Maybe you could call Kyoka up and ask her if she needed a new hero at the agency she shared with Denki.

Unfortunately, life doesn’t always go as planned, and you wake up the next morning to your phone buzzing. You called in sick the night before, partially because your cramps were really bothering you, and partially because you were avoiding Todoroki. 

Blearily, you roll over, pawing at your phone before lifting it to your ear. “Hello?”

“Good morning.” Immediately recognizing the smooth, deep voice belonging to none other than the one man you were actively trying to avoid, you do the only logical thing and hang up immediately. 

A couple seconds later your phone rings again, and this time you let it go to voicemail. The sharp trill of your ringtone reaches you through the pillow you pressed over your head, alerting you that he called several more times after that. Finally the calls stop, and you emerge from under the pillows, beating back the strange sense of disappointment rising in your chest.

Ping!

The sound of your phone chiming startles you, causing you to drop it. Picking it back up, you check your notifications with bated breath.

(1) New Message From: Todoroki Shouto

Scared to read the message, you hesitate to click on it, having no idea what to expect. Your thumb hovers over the banner, the light washing over your skin as you work up the courage to check it.

Ping!

Your phone lands on your carpet with a plop as you accidentally drop it over the edge of your bed, not expecting it to go off again.

Ping! Ping!

Cautiously, you poke your head over the edge of your bed, glancing down at the illuminated lock screen. You let out an internal screech of horror.

(4) New Messages From: Todoroki Shouto

Unable to deal with the agony of not knowing what he said any longer, you scoop your phone up and tap the notification, scanning the messages, your heart dropping further and further the more you read.

Todoroki Shouto: Did you just hang up on me?

I’ll be at your place in fifteen minutes. Do you want anything?

*image attached*

Also: are these the chocolates you’re fond of? I asked my mother and sister and they told me they enjoy chocolate when they are menstruating. 

Those are, in fact, your favorite chocolates, but as much as you wanted them you wanted him at your apartment in fifteen minutes even less. The sound of aggressive tapping filled your room as you typed out a response at breakneck speed, praying to whatever was out there that he wouldn’t actually come to your place.

You: Good morning Todoroki-San. I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize it was you and hung up because I was half asleep. It’s sweet of you to think of me, but those are expensive. Also, I’m taking the day off today so is there any possible way the matter you have to discuss could wait until tomorrow? Thanks!

A couple seconds after you hit send, the little label beneath the message changed from “delivered” to “read.” Then radio silence. Anxiety bubbles up in the pit of your stomach? What does read mean? Did he agree with you? Is he still coming? Too drained to deal with the emotional turmoil this was causing you, you rolled over and pulled your covers up over your head. This was a problem for future you.

Drifting off, you were awakened a short time later by your phone chiming once, then again a few minutes later, and the sound of your doorbell ringing. Surely it wasn’t…Half-closing your eyes to shield against the harsh glow of your phone, you unlock it.

(2) New Messages From: Todoroki Shouto

Todoroki Shouto: I’m here. Open your door.

I didn’t want to tell you over text, but you aren’t responding. Bakugou says I have romantic feelings for you and I think he is correct. He also said you’ve been “a mooney-eyed moron” for me since we were in high school. If that is true and you do feel the same way, please let me in. I would like to see you and care for you while you are on your cycle.

Three dots appear, signaling that he’s typing. A couple seconds later, your phone chimes again, not even giving you a moment to process the previous messages.

Todoroki Shouto: Our former classmates also unanimously agreed that I am, in fact, popular with the ladies. I’ll forgive your comment if you let me in. The old lady who lives next door to you is giving me suspicious looks. 

You blink. Rub your eyes. Squint closer at your screen. The words didn’t change, and neither did their meaning. And Todoroki wasn’t the type of person to joke around like this. Your mouth suddenly felt dry, and your pulse thundered in your ears as you realized there was only one thing left to do.

You had to get out of bed and let him into your apartment.

taglist: @arlerts-angel @ponderingmoonlight @sunaraii @hotvinimon

as always, please please please let me know if you want to be added to or removed from any of my taglists. tysm for reading, and i hope you enjoyed it!!

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Doctor Who, but Chronologically: 53

So, we go from 1996 to 2005, which is wild, because 1941 got three different fucking episodes but apparently the Millennium went unmarked by Doctor Who. This is also the span of time the show was off air, actually. Late 80s to 2005, with one return for the film in 1996. Hmm.

Anyway! GET READY FOR ROSE

This, back in 2005, was our first episode of new Doctor Who since its cancellation - the first episode of what I now call the Welsh series, after RTD forcibly moved production to Cardiff and thus created an industry that substantially increased Welsh GDP. Let me tell you, lads, we watched this one and we were EXCITED. It was new!!! It had modern special effects!!! It looked so impressive and shiny and high status!!!

Hilarious watching it now, two decades later, and going "Why was this filmed through a thin layer of vasoline?"

(Also hilarious seeing Cardiff pretending to be London on streets and buildings that very much do not look like that anymore. Queens Arcade! The street by the cinema with the eyebrows! Howells! What a difference 20 years makes. Such a nostalgic episode. BUT I DIGRESS)

So plot-wise we get a fairly simple episode. Autons like Rory the Roman have arrived on Earth and want to take over, but they're simply inert shop mannequins unless the Nestene Consciousness - a big vat of living plastic with a sort of lumpy face - transmits a telepathic signal to them. The Doctor is looking for this vat of plastic so he can preferably tell them to leave for a less killy planet, and if that fails, to tip a lurid blue test tube of what appears to be Panda Pop but we're assured is "anti-plastic" into the vat to... melt it more. But! He cannot find the vat, because he is failing to trace the signal.

But STORY-WISE we get, apparently, the introduction of Rose!

Long-time readers of these posts will know that I have strong opinions on how companions should be used. If they cannot pass the Sexy Lamp Test - if replacing them with a sexy lamp would literally not change the story - then the writer has utterly fucked it and needs to reconsider their career. For my money, Tumblrs, companions serve three varying purposes, to whit:

Providing fun chemistry with the Doctor so we can enjoy the pairing

Being the point-of-view human character for the audience, i.e. asking the questions or posing the theories that will make the story make sense according to our understanding

Providing the emotional connection to the other characters that mean we get fully fleshed out stories rather than boring plot points. The Doctor is plot, the companion is story

Bringing the Basic Common Sense to the proceedings to counter the Doctor's Wild Scientific Knowledge and Schemes

Each does these in different ways of course, but what's brilliant here is that Rose has all four in absolute spades. They're meeting for the first time here and he's super grumpy, but they make each other laugh almost immediately. As the Doctor strides about self-importantly, a cannon ball of purpose and curt non-explanations, it's Rose who pushes him to explain what's going on in terms she (and we) will understand, paring the plot down for us to follow. In this story, Eccleston's Doctor is the most aloof and stand-offish and Above The Petty Affairs Of Humans as we've ever seen him (except Capaldi); he cares deeply about trying to save everyone, but once an individual human is dead, he simply puts them out of his mind and moves on. It's Rose, grieving the possible loss of Mickey, who reminds us that these are people that are being lost. And, ultimately, Rose actually provides most of the final solutions - firstly by listening to the Doctor wittering on about how scientifically the Nestene MUST be using a big round circle for transmissions and going "That's the London Eye, here's the access hatch," and secondly by literally saving the Doctor's life.

And lol, yeah, she does save his life. She gets a great lil speech: "Got no A Levels, no job, no future," she says, grabbing a hanging rope while the Doctor is menaced by Autons. "But I tell you what I have got. Jericho Street Junior School under 7s gymnastics team. I got the bronze."

And she fucking. Just Tarzan swings. Right into the Autons who are holding the anti-plastic Panda Pop, knocking them right into the big vat. Incredible. What a babe.

Three last things before I wrap up!

Firstly, Christ, we get so much information about who Rose is. We're shown her messy bedroom, her useless boyfriend (side note he is SUPER USELESS in this. He was not this bad on a spaceship with Madame de Pompadour. My god, he's got some development coming), her job, her mam, her thoughts about the future. She left school for a boy, and now regrets it. She wants to make something of herself, but doesn't know how. After her job is blown up by the Doctor at the start, her mam Jackie (we've met her! We saw her recently, in Father's Day) suggests she try getting a job in a local business.

"Oh great," Rose says sarcastically. "The butchers."

"Well, maybe it'll do you good," Jackie says back. "That shop was giving you airs and graces."

... and in those two lines - in that one exchange - we know everything we need to about these people. God, it's the sort of character writing that you dream of managing. The simple mundanity of it, and what it tells you about them both; their position in society, what they think of it, what they want and aspire to and believe. Impeccable. Rose is a working class girl who dreams of more, who wants a life that's more than this. Jackie is a loving mother who's firmly in the crab bucket, and feels shame about her own life when she sees Rose reach up. God it's good.

Also, Rose has a GREAT reaction to seeing the TARDIS for the first time.

Secondly! This is seemingly an introduction of sorts for this Doctor as well! At one point, he looks in a mirror and remarks that this face is "not bad, but look at the ears", which is interesting, because we later find out he's had it a while. An internet nutter has the world's worst photoshopped prop showing Eccleston at the Kennedy Assassination (presumably he was there sorting out the Silver Nemesis) among other historical points, so the lad's been about. But alone, and avoiding mirrors.

We are also shown some super powers! He can read a book in the time it takes to flick from front to back, and he can feel planetary rotation, and he can speak Liquid Plastic. Exciting.

But also, he's constantly referencing a war here, which I suspect is going to be hell on our question list. The Nestenes lost their protein planets in the war, so they want Earth. He almost cries at the vat, telling it he tried to save their world, but he couldn't. Lots of references, but alas, once again, no answer as to which damn war this is. In theory, the episode after an introduction would explain that of course :) Presumably we'll get those answers next episode :) Surely this watch order would make us wait until, like, the year Five Billion to find out :) Ho ho ho

Finally, some absolute iconic moments in this one, but my particular favourites are: the look of Plastic Mickey and his glitching speech, with Rose literally not noticing a difference (says a lot about the quality of Mickey); Rose trying to google the word "Doctor" and expecting it to work; and my absolute favourite, which is Rose and the Doctor trying to fight a plastic arm in the living room while Jackie turns a hairdryer on for her COMPLETELY BONE DRY HAIR to give a reason as to why she misses the action. Campy fun, 10/10.

SO! Let's update the board!

“She” (an unknown person) is returning (Suspects: River, Missy, Me, Clara)

There is something on Donna’s back

An entire planet, Pyrovilia, just… disappeared, somehow. (Maybe because the TARDIS is exploding??? Saturnine was also lost, and that WAS because of the TARDIS exploding. The lion man’s planet was also lost but he was a bit of a knob about it if I’m honest. The Thijarian planet was destroyed by some sort of impact). Is this the Flux?

The TARDIS is sort of melting because it’s corrupted, but it’s fine again. NOPE, back to not working.

The Doctor has employed(?) Nardole

(And Nardole was “reassembled???” Nardole had glass nipples and invisible hair?? He used to be blue, and could apparently go back to it??? He’s some sort of helplessly criminal con-artist??? WHAT THE FUCK IS HE)

There’s an immortal Viking girl now. Her name is Me and she’s now looking after the people the Doctor abandons

Why was Rory entirely unconcerned by the entire world suddenly going silent when that is Not Normal and should have been, at the very least, extremely disconcerting?

What did the Doctor do to Queen Lizzie One?

Why is Amy seeing a one-eyed woman in a vanishing window? (She’s with the Silents, but we don’t know why Amy saw her)

Why is Amy’s pregnancy inconclusive? (Maybe because the baby had Time Lord DNA?) She’s deffo pregnant and the baby becomes River, but why inconclusive?

Who is Sarah-Jane Smith?

How is the Doctor Bill’s teacher and why/where does he have an office?

What is going on with the Cyber War and the Cyberium???

What happened with the Other Cyber War? Were either of these Cyber wars affected by the Doctor blowing them up with Nemesis?

What happened with the Third War that deleted the void?

Why does Rose seem particularly important?

What order do these Doctors go in? (Eccleston, Tennant, uncertain, Smith, Capaldi, Whittaker)

Which companion just… forgot the Doctor, and how?

Yaz and Vinder are about to die as Mori/Mwri/Muuri (Not anymore, somehow)

There is a Lupari shield around Earth.

What’s a Time War? Did this destroy the Doctor’s planet and/or family? NEW INFO: did this destroy the Auton world?

What’s the Rift?

What’s Bad Wolf? Gwyneth saw “the Big Bad Wolf” in Rose’s mind, and it was on a 1987 poster as graffiti

In which war did the Doctor become a war criminal, and how?

Is Rory plastic or not? Yeah, must be, he couldn’t possibly remember being plastic otherwise

Why is the Doctor sulking on a cloud?

How exactly does the Doctor have a cloud?

What exactly happened with Strax to, uh, tame him?

Which friend killed Strax?

Which friend brought Strax back?

Where did this lesbian lizard and human couple come from?

What happened with Clara as Souffle Girl and the Daleks?

How does Clara actually join?

Why so many Claras? A psychic midwife says she’s just normal human

Why is Missy apparently in robo-heaven? Is this because she’s now dead?

Why is probably!Missy pushing Clara and the Doctor together?

What is Trensilor and what happened there?

Who is Handles?

The Doctor is about to be dissolved by a beautiful geode man

The universe is being crushed by the Flux

Will the Doctor open the fobwatch? Is it actually just a pager?

Sontarans are invading Earth again

Who is Kate?

Who is Osgood? Another name of Clara’s again?

The fuck is the deal with the Grand Serpent

Does Martha get to go to an ice cream planet with 12-fingered massage aliens?

How did the Doctor forget Clara?

Who is Bill’s puddle girlfriend Heather? This is presumably the star-eyed water faerie

How did Nardole die?

When does the Doctor shrink and enter a Dalek called Rusty?

Whittaker is falling to her death rn

Was that ring relevant?

Does anyone know the Doctor’s name? Missy says it’s “Who”

When did Yaz talk to Dan about fancying the Doctor?

When did Dan talk to the Doctor about fancying Yaz?

What’s happening with the bees?

What happened with Donna’s ex and a giant spider?

What war wiped out the Daleks, and is it one of the ones already mentioned?

What did the Doctor mean when he said “The (Daleks) always live, while I lose everything?”

If Dalek Caan is the last Dalek left why are there more now?

How did the rest of the Time Lords die?

How and why did Amy melt?

What’s the question that will make silence fall?

Why do the Silents… want silence to fall?

How and why are Silents at war with the Doctor when he… hasn’t even heard of them?

How does Hitler get out of the cupboard?

What’s the significance of fish fingers and custard?

Why does the Doctor feel guilt about Rose, Martha and Donna?

What happened with the space whale?

How does the Doctor survive River? He doesn’t, apparently

How does he erase himself from history

Did Captain Jack lose his memories to the same people as the Doctor? What did he lose?

When did the Doctor send the Daleks into a void to save the universe?

Why do Amy and Rory think the Doctor is dead? Is it because of River as an astronaut?

Is Matt Smith’s Doctor a tree racist?

Why is the beautiful geode woman stealing people into a Passenger form?

River says she’ll die one day when the Doctor doesn’t remember her, let’s hope she doesn’t mean it

Why doesn’t the TARDIS like Clara?

When was the Master Prime Minister?

How do Amy and Rory rejoin the Doctor given that they haven’t died yet in 1950s Manhattan?

[breelandwalker]

Hi Bree.

I know your blog is really witchcraft stuff, but I saw the post you reblogged with the modern four Humorous joke and thought you might kinda understand what I'm talking about and I need to say this to someone or I'm going to explode.

So, I am interested in medicinal herbalism and things like home remedies, but instead of it being from the "oh, miracle plants that heal people because it helps *balance your soul*!" I'm specifically interested in the historical "this is how people used what they had" and scientific "many of these plants contain chemicals that can affect the body in different ways"....... which means watching some of these videos makes me want to strangle people.

(These are (sadly) all based on real videos I've actually seen, by the way)

"These herbs are ~cooling~ and will help you keep cool this summer. They affect the body on a cellular-"

[That's lavender and hibiscus. They are cooling you down because they are lowering your blood pressure, which is why people with things like POTS or just low blood pressure need to be careful not to drink too much.]

"If you don't like the idea of yucky chemical morphine try this inste-"

[Those are poppies. Those are poppy seeds. Thats... you just made shitty opium. Your solution to morphine is.... shitty low-grade unrefined morphine. Got it.]

"Try taking these herbs for a three month **parasite cleanse**. They were used in the ~**ancient times**~ but modern medicine has decided that they're not good enough-"

[That is tansy and FUCKING WORMWOOD- yes people used them for insects replant and parasites in the MIDDLE AGES but now we DON'T. Do you know why? No, its not because they're 'not good enough'. It's because they both contain a neruotoxin that will kill if taken to long (which is about a month, by the way) or at too high a dose. We don't use them because they are dangerous, and if you keep at this, you are going to kill someone.]

"Try these three plants to balance your-"

[Stop talking. Just. Stop.]

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely don't mind superstition or spirituality or anything like that. I'm a witch. I'd be stupid to disapprove of something like that when I do shit like that. But there are times when you need to leave the pointy hat by the door, and medicine is one of them. (Especially herbalism, because plants are unrefined and unpredictable and can absolutely kill or hurt people.)

OH MY VARIOUS GODS, I DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE THAT ACCURATE. 😂

I mean, the mentality behind the wellness movement is FIRMLY rooted in ableism, eugenics, and pseudoscience, but every so often it's brought home to me just how much of it is buzzwords and jargon that mean absolutely nothing.

Modern medicine is just potions that work reliably and wellness influencers need to STOP, it's fuckin embarrassing.

(Referring to this post - The Four Wellness Humors)

[my-darling-boy]

It’s horrible how my design course has killed my enjoyment in creativity because all they want is finished pieces founded in nothing but a spontaneous mark just to hang at some concrete art gallery or to sell to some “join our revolution” comfy business-casual company with a prison cell wellness room. I’m not saying that it’s “not art” —cos that’s a different post altogether— it’s that the ethos behind this particular formula for art education is ruining the way we think about creation.

Design courses (and other art courses I’ve heard?) are no longer teaching artists or designers techniques, drawing skills, art fundamentals and allowing them to find their own voice so much as they are only instructing how to tic boxes alongside pushing corporate and classist motivated style/methodology bias aimed at producing workers, not creatives, not to mention providing Adobe with endless funds for their despicable scam programs. That’s it. My creativity is only a means to money for them, and if they can extract the process of creation from me without the complex creative intimacy involved in it, they know they can churn out products and services faster and it’s concerning some lecturers don’t seem to be aware this is what they’re teaching? Like they’re buying into industry propaganda?

And the whole time it’s sold to you like you can be some trailblazer when the irony is they’re usually either prepping you for cubicle work or for some misguided high horse creative team pumping out design solutions completely divorced from the reality. I’m tired of all the talks about sustainability in a vacuum with no conversation about nuanced designs that factor in broader social and economic perspectives which lack thereof is leading to sustainable products being sold at a price only able to be afforded by wealthier people who are causing said economic and social problems and contributing to the rapid obsoletion of trades and crafts. Lecturers and speakers don’t seem to think that’s any of our concern and should just worry about producing the design for the hypothetical Bluetooth powered organic hairbrush or using the twigs to make the pattern for the £85 fabric square.

Like? Can I please make something that actually resonates with people outside the circle jerk of egotistical creatives and corporations? Something charming and maybe idk something that doesn’t make me want to tear my miserable portfolio in half with my teeth? And they’re like Mm nope sorry it has to be an extreme close up of a mark making abstract leaf you made from a recycled trash bag inspired by a stalled urban space which we will force you to price at £100 during your exhibition 5 people will bother to attend and no you’re not allowed any other style cos this isn’t the Dark Ages :///

I think the worst thing my lecturer ever said was, while looking around the room of our class work reduced down to a series of cubes and splatters and abstract typography, “Wow, I love how you can’t tell what anyone’s [main artist discipline] is!” Like awww conformity at the expense of a person’s individuality to make pieces for airport hallways and rich people’s living rooms wow so cool heehee like girl that’s not good?? Why on Earth are you complimenting us for that? Like I get it, I thought this course would boost skillset as an illustrator (as we were told), turns out the degree is really not for me, fair enough to anyone thinking that, but forcing students to produce modern abstract art because you think it’s the ONLY Logical Pathway for the future of design, judging them intensely for doing a different style, and thinking producing financially inaccessible art + design is the solution to things like climate change and community severance is an objectively bad take.

[homestuckreplay]

oooo did rereading act 1/2 feel different now that you've read problem sleuth???

yes, definitely! I have stopped looking at Act 1 as a complete beginning, and started seeing it as a continuation of something that was already ongoing (MSPA as a whole). like, when Homestuck started, a young man standing in his bedroom wasn’t logged as Homestuck page 1, it was MSPA page 1901, and the people reading it back then were almost exclusively Problem Sleuth fans.

I saw a post a while back (which I sadly cannot find again) saying something like ‘people who didn’t spend a year waiting for Problem Sleuth to escape his office building will never understand what it felt like to see John easily leave his house 10 days into Homestuck’ and I think that post is correct – that must have been a very strange and surprising reveal. Problem Sleuth is so based on video game logic that it’s often very literal, and its puzzles only have one solution. PS, AD and PI are trapped in their building, and need the Megaton Key to escape. in real life, if you were trapped in an office building, you’d have options. calling some sort of building manager or locksmith, leaving via an emergency back exit, smashing a window, finding a YouTube tutorial on how to pick locks, etc. but a video game can bar all but the ‘correct’ solution (aside from cheats, mods, etc), as can an author. Homestuck sticks to this in some ways – the alchemy sequence in Sburb’s tutorial level, for example – but overall it feels much more grounded in reality than Problem Sleuth does, and much more metaphorical (its title, for example). those things only feel weird now that I have PS as a comparison!

in popular culture and especially in music, people talk a lot about ‘second album syndrome’, where an artist whose first album was a big success really struggles with their followup. sometimes that’s about the massively increased pressure on them, but often it’s that they put all their good ideas into their first album and haven’t had time to develop any new ones. in my opinion disappointing followups usually fall into one of two categories – either they try to do the exact same thing as the first album and feel like an uninspired retread, or they purposefully try to make something as different as possible, and end up experimenting without a solid artistic vision behind it. conversely, the second albums I love tend to take the ideas of the first album and build upon them. the artist is still working in the space that really interests them, but is actively trying to learn and advance their craft. a well known modern example of this is Olivia Rodrigo’s second album GUTS (2023), which is primarily about the same breakup as her debut SOUR (2021), but written with two years of perspective on those feelings, reflecting on her own actions and on other people’s responses to her original songs about them.

I think early Homestuck is basically doing the same thing, taking the core ideas of Problem Sleuth such as applying video game logic, inventories and battle systems to reality, characters interacting with their own medium, and telling a high concept story through small, reader-influenced actions, and exploring those through a different lens. PS, AD and PI could enter cheat codes for their own game and re-enter saved states, but due to their 1920s setting, none of them played video games outside of the one they were part of, so the mechanics that governed their lives had no context to them. John and his friends do play video games, program computers, etc, and so they’re able to more consciously game the mechanics of their own lives. Homestuck’s inventory systems are more complex and variable than PS’ equivalents, giving readers far more options (and opportunities for jokes) with their commands. the beta kids are far more similar to the average MSPA reader in their experiences, interests and senses of humor than Team Sleuth were, so might on some level be based on the types of people who were already reading the site. so PS and HS have similar ideas, very different execution

(for what it’s worth I think if Hussie had made a full Midnight Crew adventure instead of making Homestuck, it would have been far more of a retread of PS’ ideas instead of an advancement, and probably would not have recaptured the magic that PS accidentally stumbled on. but that’s guesswork)

anyway something else is that John, Rose and Dave are all Problem Sleuth fans!! and that meant something more to me on this reread than it ever has before. John, for example, has a poster of Problem Sleuth acting all hardboiled in his office with his gun and candy corn. John tends to identify with main characters over side characters, and he believes the front that people put up, even when it’s pretty obvious to other people that they’re faking. Rose has posters of Fluthlu and other strange beasts from PS’ imaginary realm, because she’s interested in occult and esoteric ideas over humor and puzzles. She probably read/played PS for its universe-destroying monsters more than any investment in whether Team Sleuth escape their building. Dave already has merch for Midnight Crew and the Felt despite not being super into the new adventure. He’s someone who doesn’t tend to stick with things for too long, and is always trying to keep up with what’s new so that he can have an opinion on it – PS is over, so he’s moved on. having your new main characters be a fan of your existing work feels pretty self indulgent, but the way they each interact with that work is VERY true to the rest of their characterization.

obviously there’s also a bunch of small references, like when Dave is described as ‘starting to flip the fuck out’ (p.465), or when John is commanded to ‘Fondly regard cremation’ (p.52), or my personal favorite, ‘CD: Punch clocks in faces to establish chronology’ (p.1180). Homestuck is always referencing itself too, with its many variations on doing an acrobatic fucking pirouette off the handle or stating immutable facts for the record or friendship being an emotion - specific turns of phrase that are used over and over to give the work its very strong voice and linguistic identity, keeping it cohesive even as it goes through wild shifts in tone, setting and art style, but without a greater ‘meaning’. the same way that a meme can circulate through different communities, platforms, even time periods, which makes it feel like there’s a singular ‘internet culture’ even though this is a huge and disparate place. so these references recurring from PS show that this concept I’d already noticed in Homestuck exists throughout MSPA and links these stories that seem like they’re taking place in very different worlds. I’m not someone who tries to pick out every tiny example of self-reference but the general idea does work for me.

anyway in conclusion: Problem Sleuth is very good and I don’t think it’s necessary to read it to understand Homestuck, but it has definitely changed my perspective on the early acts and given me some valuable context, which is very worthwhile!

[bitchymanlet]

Is Erwin Leftist or Fascist?

I'm basically expanding on what I've already posted on twitter about this.

The fandom seems to be pretty split on whether Erwin would be a Jaegerist or not—I've even seen fans going so far as to say he'd be a Trump supporter in the modern day. These could just be trolls or ignorant teenagers (both?) spewing this bs, but let's be clear,

Overthrowing the government does not indicate leftist or right-wing policy.

One of the most common rebuttals I see to the argument that Erwin is fascist is: "But he overthrew the government!" My guess is they think of revolutions by the people, such as the French and Russian ones, which were progressive, left-wing. But fascists do hostile takeovers too, such as the Blackshirts in Italy, and the January 6th Insurrection (the latter being a failed attempt at one).

Instead of using Erwin's staged coup as evidence that he is leftist, let's look into the reasons why he's Not Fascist.

He values intellectualism. We see in the text that Erwin supports and sees the value in Hange's titan research, and he believes the people deserve to know the truth, ie freedom of press—he was kept in the dark about the truth of their world, and he spent his whole life seeking the truth so that it could be shared with everyone. Fascists don't want thinkers, they want obedience.

Erwin allows those below his station to speak and think freely. We see how Levi, his subordinate, speaks to him informally and to other high-ranking military officials right in front of Erwin, but Erwin doesn't reprimand him or even punish him for his transgressions, because he respects him (an uneducated riffraff from the underground) as an equal. He allows 15 year old fresh out of the Cadet Corps Armin to speak up about his hunches, make suggestions, and he even let Armin give more experienced Scouts orders during their most pivotal battle in the history of the Survey Corps. He encourages his Scouts to question what they're fighting for and who their true enemies are rather than flat-out telling them. Unlike Fascists, he doesn't seem to enforce social hierarchy or genetic superiority of any kind.

He doesn't demonize The Other or motivate his soldiers with fear. He's doesn't rally his soldiers by proclaiming that humans are superior to titans and that they must crush them to assert humanity's dominance and superiority—he doesn't possess a hatred for titans like Eren does. He sees them more as obstacles to finding the truth. A core belief to fascists is proving that they are the chosen ones who will beat down the inhuman degenerates beneath them. He shows no sense of innate superiority.

We can't say for sure if he would be a Jaegerist because he died before all of that, but it is extremely unlikely given his aforementioned anti-fascist qualities. Why would he ever fall for Eren and Zeke's plot? Erwin is certainly smarter than Eren, but Zeke is a competent leader and strategist himself. However, what Zeke lacks that Erwin didn't is Hope. Erwin didn't give up on humanity like Zeke did, instead he valued and sought after knowledge. He saw failures and tragedies as learning opportunities and steps to a better outcome. Suffice it to say, he's not hateful or nihilistic enough to be on either of the Jaeger brothers' side, he'd think of a better solution than revenge or no babies.

So we can deduce that he is not a Fascist.

But is he a Leftist?

Back to the coup de'tat, Erwin staged it not to subjugate civilians, execute his opposers and instate military rule (what fascists do), but to live on to find the truth. That was it. Being a Scout granted him the freedom to venture outside of the walls and to learn more about their world and about the titans. If the Survey Corps dissolved and he got hanged, then the truth would possibly never come to light. The previous government would execute people for trying to leave and seek the truth. Erwin elevating Historia as the rightful monarch and, as a result, the people learning that the former monarch was a fake and that they have been lied to was just a nice bonus. Not why he did it.

There's little evidence for his personal political beliefs, as much of his character arc revolves around him Getting Closer To The Truth. If he were a leftist, he would show support for the common man's struggle and a disdain for the ruling class (like woke class-conscious king Levi). If his coup were politically motivated (in a progressive way), he would have started a revolution to free the people from the king's tyranny, he might have even called for the eradication of the crown altogether and touted democracy and the redistribution of wealth. Instead, he showed uncertainty and remorse for his coup, not confidence that he'd done the right thing for humanity's sake.

Again, Erwin was only saving his own skin so that he could find out what was in Eren's basement. He didn't feel strongly about dismantling the system and creating a more equitable government, which would be leftist. Rather, he feels more comfortable with upholding the status quo while also maintaining individual liberty.

Ergo, based on canon events, I don't think Erwin is a leftist or a fascist, I think he's a liberal.

[paigegonerogue]

5 Modern AUs I Highly Recommend

Hey guys! I know updates are taking a second, but I thought as an apology (and to tide you over for just a little while longer), I’d recommend some of my favorite Modern AUs of TLOU! All of these people are so incredibly talented, and there are about a zillion more I’d want to add to the list, so let me know if you want a part 2!

(These are in no particular order, btw!)

(Also, the links aren’t working… sorry…)

LIVING ON THE EDGE

My friend @messitydepressity just recently finished this absolute masterpiece of a fic where Joel and Ellie meet in an NA meeting. It’s beautiful and heartbreaking and so emotionally devastating that it left me absolutely stunned. It’s so real and authentic and bittersweet. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry (a lot) and you’ll scream. It’s joyous and it’s painful and it doesn’t shy away from the hardships out characters are facing. Sometimes for them it feels impossible to go on, but they continue to persevere. It flows so perfectly, and it’s truly a journey and an experience.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/62618419/chapters/160285405

SHOOT FOR THE STARS

This fic is stunning. Genuinely, it leaves me without words. Written by @millermenapologist, Shoot for the Stars is a deeply cathartic and powerful experience. It’s gritty and complex and real. There are no easy answers or simple solutions. Each and every character is so complex and every individual arc is so gripping. It’s one of the most beautifully written things I’ve ever read, genuinely. It’s naturalistic yet incredibly profound, and there’s this thread of deep heartache that runs through it and pays off in such a perfect and gorgeous way that I can only ever dream of writing something half as good.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/51778003/chapters/130903687

A SIMPLE FAVOR

This fic made me ugly cry. Written by the truly unreal @boopernatural, It’s such a thoroughly devastating exploration of grief and healing. After Bill passes away, Joel takes over his job teaching woodshop, where he meets Ellie. Every word is drenched in emotion, and Joel’s grief is palpable through the page. The tragic and profound collide in the intelligent and aching observations on grief. It’s another fic that might not end in a fairytale bow, but the hope and the catharsis it brings is unimaginable.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/52963615

COMPASSIONATE FRIENDS

My wonderful friend @mildredellie has written (and still costumes to write) this absolutely stellar fic. Joel and Ellie meet in a grief support group, and things evolve from there. It’s so perfect, just genuinely amazing I every way. Their development is so perfect and well paced, and the scenes of them bonding and learning to care for each other are so incredibly special and beautiful. It perfectly balances the hardships and the good times, and the capturing of the characters is just so effortless. It’s sweet and sad and gorgeous and funny, every little thing just fits so perfectly that it really feels like you’re looking at this bright and detailed tapestry of words. It’s perfect.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48105289/chapters/121302250

Last and certainly not least we have:

OPEN SESAME

@penandinkprincess might just be the GOAT of tlou fanfic. She really has too many incredible fics to counts, but one of my absolute favorites is Open Sesame. In it, Joel catches Ellie trying to pickpocket him, and it all spirals out from there. This fic is just perfect. The way their relationship is built is so incredibly sweet, and it also features my hands-down favorite post-David caretaking scene ever (and that’s a high bar!). It’s so incredibly well written, every word just perfect as it guides you along. It’s sad at parts, but the underlying hope and love in this fic is so beautiful and the ending makes me tear up. This fic is so special to me, it’s one of the fics that got me really into TLOU fanfiction, and I don’t think I know near-enough words to express just how much I love it.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/50244706/chapters/126913369

Anyways, that’s all the refs for this list. Let me know if you want a part two! Thank you to all these unbelievably skilled authors for writing these, and if for any reason you want me to remove your fic from this list just reach out.

Anyways, more from me coming soon! Hope this gets you through the last week until s2!

[artdotpage]

Problems facing modern artists & creators

I've talked with hundreds of artists and creators about the difficulties they face trying to earn a living from their craft.

This post covers two of the big ones (social media algorithms & bargain basement marketplaces), and what tools are available to grow your business despite these issues.

Social Media Algorithms and Audience Ownership

Social media platforms are a godsend for getting your work in front of potential clients and building a loyal fan base.

However as you will all have experienced, it can take a mastermind to figure out what kind of content the algorithm wants you to post, and if you don't do that you'd be as well throwing your content into the void as even your own followers might not see your post, never mind new viewers.

It also means you don't truly own your audience, if you post something slightly controversial your account could be deleted without warning, or perhaps a billionaire buys the site and everyone flocks to a new platform where you have to start growing your following all over again.

Solution: Build a mailing list

This is perhaps the single best marketing tool available to any business, and is sorely overlooked by artists and creators.

It's cost effective and because you own your mailing list it doesn't matter what's happening on social sites, you can always keep in touch with them.

The tricky part is converting people into mailing list subscribers. However I've seen plenty of creators successfully build one by offering incentives including free digital downloads, early access to content, discounts on your store etc.

Those who sign up to your mailing list would be considered high quality followers, someone who is much more likely to convert to a paid client and buy from you again in the future compared to the average follower on social media.

Tools

https://art.page/

https://substack.com/

https://convertkit.com/

Losing clients to undercutting competitors on the same platform/marketplace

If you run your business on a marketplace or platform, your clients are one click away from finding plenty of other choices who are willing to undercut everyone else to land a sale.

These sites have no incentive to make sure that traffic you drive to your profile actually purchase from you. Whether a sale is made through your listing or another seller, they collect their fee either way.

They also use uniform designs which reduce you to a generic product listing. Whilst this can simplify the customer experience, it means you have no control over the sales funnel and ability to differentiate yourself, making it harder to convert potential clients into paying customers.

Solution: Direct clients to your own site

Use your own personal website to make sales from, there are plenty of options with no monthly charge and lower fees than marketplaces. This lets you make dedicated marketing pages showcasing your best work to make a client excited about doing business with you, instead of just being a generic product listing.

Take advantage of marketplaces purely for their customer base. Don't rely on them as your sole business platform. This way, any fees you pay are worthwhile to generate sales you wouldn't have had otherwise. 

Tools

https://art.page/

https://www.bigcartel.com/

https://squareup.com/

Interested in more?

There's plenty more I have to share on this topic, including:

How to properly use Print on Demand without getting ripped off

Streamline managing your business so you spend more time creating and growing your business.

How to better utilize your brand to connect with clients and increase sales

So let me know if you’re interested and I’ll get writing!

Transparency

I'm building https://art.page to solve these exact issues, with the goal to create the best all in one site builder for artists and creators that makes running your business easy.

[imsobadatnicknames2]

What's OSR? I've seen you mention it several times in your RPG posts. Is it like a genre of rpg or...?

Hey, sorry I took so long to reply to this lol you probably already just googled it by now.

But like. Anyway.

OSR (Old-School Revival, Old-School Renaissance, and more uncommonly Old-School Rules or Old-School Revolution, no one can really agree on what the R means) is less like a genre and more like a movement or a loosely connected community that seeks to capture the tone, feel and/or playstyle of 70's and 80's fantasy roleplaying games (with a particular emphasis on old-school editions of Dungeons and Dragons, particularly the Basic D&D line but pretty much anything before 3e falls under this umbrella), or at least an idealized version of what people remember those games felt like to play.

There isn't exactly a consensus on what makes a game OSR but here's my personal list of things that I find to be common motifs in OSR game design and GM philosophy. Not every game in the movement features all of these things, but must certainly feature a few of them.

Rulings over rules: most OSR games lack mechanically codified rules for a lot of the actions that in modern D&D (and games influenced by it) would be covered by a skill system. Rather that try to have rules applicable for every situation, these games often have somewhat barebones rules, with the expectation that when a player tries to do something not covered by them the GM will have to make a ruling about it or negotiate a dice roll that feels fair (a common resolution system for this type of situation is d20 roll-under vs a stat that feels relevant, a d6 roll with x-in-6 chance to succeed, or just adjudicating the outcome based on how the player describes their actions)

"The solution is not on your character sheet": Related to the point above, the lack of character skills means that very few problems can be solved by saying "I roll [skill]". E.g. Looking for traps in an OSR game will look less like "I rolled 18 on my perception check" and more like "I poke the flagstones ahead with a stick to check if they're pressure plates" with maybe the GM asking for a roll or a saving throw if you do end up triggering a trap.

High lethality: Characters are squishy, and generally die much more easily. But conversely, character creation is often very quick, so if your character dies you can usually be playing again in minutes as long as there's a decent chance to integrate your new PC into the game.

Lack of emphasis on encounter balance: It's not uncommon for the PCs to find themselves way out of their depth, with encounters where they're almost guaranteed to lose unless they run away or find a creative way to stack the deck in their favor.

Combat as a failure state: Due to the two points above, not every encounter is meant to be fought, as doing so is generally not worth the risk and likely to end up badly. Players a generally better off finding ways to circumvent encounters through sneaking around them, outsmarting them, or out-maneauvering them, fighting only when there's no other option or when they've taken steps to make sure the battle is fought on their terms (e.g. luring enemies into traps or environmental hazards, stuff like that)

Emphasis on inventory and items: As skills, class features and character builds are less significant than in modern D&D (or sometimes outright nonexistent), a large part of the way the players engage with the world instead revolves around what they carry and how they use it. A lot of these games have you randomly roll your starting inventory, and often this will become as much a significant part of your character as your class is, even with seemingly useless clutter items. E.g. a hand mirror can become an invaluable tool for peeping around corners and doorways. This kind of gameplay techncially possible on modern D&D but in OSR games it's often vital.

Gold for XP: somewhat related to the above, in many of these games your XP will be determined by how much treasure you gather, casting players in the role and mindset of trasure hutners, grave robbers, etc.

Situations, not plots: This is more of a GM culture thing than an intrinsic feature of the games, but OSR campaigns will often eschew the long-form GM-authored Epic narrative that has become the norm since the late AD&D 2e era, in favor of a more sandbox-y "here's an initial situation, it's up to you what you do with it" style. This means that you probably won't be getting elaborate scenes plotted out sessions in advance to tie into your backstory and character arc, but it also means increased player agency, casting the GM in the role of less of a plot writer or narrator and more of a referee.

Like I said, these are not universal, and a lot of games that fall under the OSR umbrella will eschew some or most of these (it's very common for a lot of games to drop the gold-for-xp thing in favor of a different reawrd structure), but IMO they're a good baseline for understanding common features of the movement as a whole.

Of course, the OSR movement covers A LOT of different games, which I'd classify in the following categories by how much they deviate from their source of inspiration:

Retroclones are basically recreations of the ruleset of older D&D editions but without the D&D trademark, sometimes with a new coat of paint. E.g. OSRIC and For Gold and Glory are clones of AD&D (1e and 2e respectively); Whitebox and Fantastic Medieval Campaigns are recreations of the original 1974 white box D&D release; Old School Essentials, Basic Fantasy and Labyrinth Lord are clones of the 1981 B/X D&D set. Some of these recreate the original rules as-is, editing the text or reorganizing the information to be clearer but otherwise leaving the meachnics unchanged, while others will make slight rules changes to remove quirks that have come to be considered annoying in hindsight, some of them might mix and match features from different editions, but otherwise they're mostly straight up recreations of old-school D&D releases.

There are games that I would call "old-school compatible", that feature significant enough mechanical changes from old-school D&D to be considered a different game, but try to maintain mechanical compatibility with materials made for it. Games like The Black Hack, Knave, Macchiato Monsters, Dungeon Reavers, Whitehack, etc. play very differently from old-school D&D, and from each other, but you generally can grab any module made for any pre-3e D&D edition and run it with any of them with very little to no effort needed in conversion.

There's a third category that I wouldn't know how to call. Some people call then Nu-OSR or NSR (short for New School revolution) while a small minority of people argue that they aren't really part of the OSR movement but instead their own thing. I've personally taken to calling them "Old School Baroque". These are games that try to replicate different aspects of the tone and feel of old-school fantasy roleplaying games while borrowing few to none mechanics from them and not making any particular attempts to be mechanically compatible. Games like Into the Odd, Mörk Borg, Troika!, a dungeon game, FLEE, DURF, Songbirds, Mausritter, bastards, Cairn, Sledgehammer, and too many more to name. In my opinion this subsection of the OSR space is where it gets interesting, as there's so many different ways people try to recreate that old-school flavor with different mechanics.

(Of course, not everything fits neatly into these, e.g. I would consider stuff like Dungeon Crawl Classics to be somewhere inbetween category 1 and 2, and stuff like GloG or RELIC to be somewhere imbetween categories 2 and 3)

The OSR movement does have its ugly side, as it's to be expected by the fact that a huge part of the driving force behind it is nostalgia. Some people might be in it because it harkens back to a spirit of DIY and player agency that has been lost in traditional fantasy roleplaying games, but it's udneniable that some people are also in it because for them it harkens back to a time before "D&D went woke" when tabletop roleplaying was considered a hobby primarily for and by white men. That being said... generally those types of guys keep to themselves in their own little circlejerk, and it's pretty easy to find OSR spaces that are progressive and have a sinificant number of queer, POC, and marginalized creators.

[nardo-headcanons]

Hey my dear mutual! Another super stupid and weird request coming, so, please, feel totally free to ignore completely if you want, really. So, let's say instead of a criminal organization, the Akatsuki are actually a lab team. Which would be their roles, their work focus or their research topics? How would they behave at work with each other or, I don't know, whatever you can think of. Inspired by your agar plates post, by the way, hahahaha

Hello Sasuke, my dear. Don't call your asks weird, I love how creative they are! If anyone wants to write a fic about this please TAG me!

Big thanks to @the-real-sasuke-uchiha for requesting!

The Akatsuki in a modern research lab AU

Akatsuki Labs, Inc. No one knows what they're actually researching, and how they get their funding, however everyone hires them, they're incredibly popular with institutions and businesses alike...

Deidara is a lab rookie who is still at the beginning of his study. He went to a scientific high school and an absolute ace at chemistry. Besides studying chemistry, his other major is pyrotechnical engineering. He blows shit up on the regular and even adds copper sulphate to fires when he is the one supposed to put them out. He frequently steals minerals from the lab to use them for his pottery projects. And yes, he knows how to make meth.

Hidan is on his way to become a neurologist. He is fascinated by the way the nervous system works (especially while processing pain) and has the ego of a neurosurgeon twice his age. However he is regularly asked for a second opinion because he knows his shit. He's pretty popular with the ladies due to his confidence, however many of them are freaked out when they find out what a huge masochist he is.

I've never seen Itachi as a huge stem guy, but I've actually had a discussion about this with my dear moots @pet-plasma-bubble and @suki91 and came to the conclusion that he's either a plant biologist or studies medicine because he's one of these kids with a chronic and/or underdiagnosed illness going into medicine to make a change. Plant biologist!Itachi regularly talks to his plants when no one is looking and he gives them names as well. He doesn't really care much for the actual lab work and prefers to take care of the plants in the different lab greenhouses. Med student!Itachi is one of these anatomy girlies who draw their stuff in fancy colors and actually enjoy studying human anatomy.

Kakuzu is a senior scientist/professor who initially studied pharmacology/pharmacy to save many lives and prolong the lives of millions, but eventually got disillusioned and sold his soul to the pharma industry. He should technically be retired now, but he joined the Akatsuki labs inc to make some money on the side.

Kisame started out as a marine biologist specializing in shark research, however, seeing these beautiful, innocent creatures get bastardized by Hollywood and pollution made him apply to Akatsuki labs inc to help find solutions to the current crises caused by humanity. During his free time, he volunteers in a dolphin rehabilitation center.

Konan is the cofounder of Akatsuki labs inc, everyone respects her and even looks up to her. Once a brilliant scientist in the field of engineering, she got tired of how male dominated it was and how her male colleagues kept getting the credit for her ideas. She frequently holds lab courses for young girls interested going into the scientific field.

Nagato is the Akatsuki labs founder, and rarely seen in the lab. He has made himself a name in the field of robotics by inventing the Shurado robotics system which helps millions of automated machines run to this day. Rarely seen in the lab, he communicated with his employees via his Pain Alias Email. though to be fair, Konan writes most of these emails for him; she's the only one regularly talking to him face-to-face.

Orochimaru is a geneticist and biochemist, his focus being finding ways to avoid cellular decay, as well as the human genome and anti aging research. His parents are academics as well and he lived up to their expectations to the fullest. He has his own skincare formula which keeps him looking snatched at all times. Given the rumors about several scientific ethical code violations, everyone is kinda scared of him except for his personal lab tech, Kabuto.

Sasori is a renowed mortician who's also very interested in histology. His preparation techniques are unmatched and he even invented new preparation- and histological staining methods, which are called "Red Sand" and "Red Technique", respectively. He often gets into fights with Kakuzu about his microtome collection being unnecessarily expensive.

Tobi is the Akatsuki labs CEO cosplaying as a clueless intern that always steals from the candy bowl in the waiting room. In reality, he has a PHD in physics, his thesis being about rifts in space time and interdimensional interactions, however all of his papers are published under an alias. He has a soft spot for Deidara and refuses to fire him despite the latter's frequent "accidents".

Zetsu is a biological anthropologist fascinated by human evolution and human behavior. Some think even his colleagues are subjects of his studies. Some people say he's two-faced, but he is very chatty and inquisitive most of the time. He volunteered to have Itachi's venus fly traps in his office and can sometimes be seen feeding them dead flies or mosquitoes.

[cripplecharacters]

I really enjoyed the post you reblogged about how disabled people still have communities, especially in the modern day. But what if you’re not writing a story set in the present day? What if you’re writing fanfiction for a universe that is set way behind ours, and doesn’t appear to have any real communities for disabled people? I want to write a story about the founding of the first community for disabled people in that world. But how would you found something like that? I’m considering them going to the ruler of the land, who is invisibly disabled. But what should the steps be from there? Where should they meet, and what kind of accessibility concerns do I need to think about? I know about ramps for wheelchairs and lights that can be dimmed for autistic people, but what else? What would the community do? Would it just be social, or would it do activism?

Hi! So:

Depending on how your world is already built is when you would determine what changes or accommodations your characters would want to build or improve. For example, a medieval-technology-level world where no one builds stairs anyway is already accessible in that way for wheelchair users, even if it's far behind us technologically.

Community is often social, yes, but when communities, even social-based ones, need help or justice (with laws, with accommodations, or anything else), they often turn to activism to get their needs met.

For example: communities with d/Deaf people often develop sign languages. If the number of deaf people is high enough, maybe even hearing people will commonly use sign language. Sign language will be necessary for deaf people to communicate, especially in a world with no hearing aids. But the community could later develop to activism: ensuring there's interpreters available, or that information is presented in formats other than just audio format, like captions and transcripts.

As to accessibility concerns: think about common disabilities, and how those need to be accommodated. You've mentioned ramps and dimmable lights. I'll comment on those first, then add a bit

Ramps for wheelchairs: A pretty big one, and very necessary. But how about accessible doorways? Wheelchairs are usually wider than people. How about accessible seating that ensures a person can transfer into it or sit with their wheelchair? Bathrooms that can fit a wheelchair, and maybe a carer as well?

Dimmable lights: These can be helpful for autistic people, yes. But I'd love it if you consider something else as well: conflicting access needs. Many visually impaired people, for one, will need lights to make the most out of their remaining vision. This is hard to solve sometimes because just like in real life, things are not universal. The solution might be sunglasses for the person sensitive to light, or maybe the person who needs more light gets an extra light source.

Blindness and deafness are both very common disabilities worldwide today, and will likely be common in your world too, and would need to be accommodated. How about interpreters or transcripts? Braille or another tactile alphabet? Intellectual disability and cognitive impairments (permanent and temporary) are very common too. How about easy to read documents with clear information as opposed to jargon, if your setting uses documents? How about encouraging asking questions, or having someone take notes? How about trying to use clear language as often as possible?

Many disabled people need breaks often, whether that's physical or mental. How about areas where they can do that? How about just the acceptance that this is needed? Many disabled people need carers, too, whether this is all the time or only occasionally. How about ensuring these carers are available and well-compensated from their work? How about people making sure these carers treat the disabled person they care for fairly? How about ensuring a disabled person can bring their carer along to something, whether it's a social event or an informational event or what have you?

This is not an exhaustive list and could never be, because various people have differing needs and it depends on the needs of the people in your community. Something that helps someone might hinder someone, and in life it is a balance. What would help is if everyone is able to advocate for their needs, and the community and those who interact with them can figure out how to best fit those needs.

You will have a lot to think about, and keep in mind that disabilities are immensely varied and there's so many of them with and without overlap.

- Mod Sparrow

Hey!

Some of the ways that disability communities could - and have - formed, are heavily influenced by what's going on in the world.

In pre-modern times, disabled people would eventually end up together because resources to treat or care for us weren't readily available. That means that disability communities would form at hospitals, or areas where many people rapidly became sick or wounded for one reason or another. This can happen quickly, and it could be the case that what is now the disabled community of the region used to be just the community of ABC City before river blindness became a problem.

If someone became (or was born) disabled, and there was One Place around you where this person could receive care, they would visit there sooner or later. Assuming this happens often enough, a community will form.

For accessibility, it really depends on the type of community it is. If it's supposed to be extremely diverse, you will have a ton of things to consider - wheelchair users, little people, blind people, Deaf people, autistic people, intellectually disabled people, people who require 24/7 care... It will be a lot to think about.

If it's a community where everyone (or the big majority) has similar needs, then there's a high chance that only their needs would be considered. Disabled people, like most people, think of themselves first - if the community is, for example, primarily autistic, they might not consider the needs of DeafBlind people much or at all. That's what happens in real life, unfortunately. In a scenario where a person tries to join that community and finds it inaccessible, a second, different community would form. And it could go on like this for more or less forever.

Would it just be social, or would it do activism?

Both, probably. Communities start as social, but over time, as they grow, activism is needed. The focus changes as the community "matures". But they will always be parts that are purely social, and parts that are ready to fight for their rights by any means necessary. It's just the ratio of these two that shifts.

I hope this helps,

mod Sasza

[starlostlix]

NEW BSD CHAPTER (120.5) SPOILERS because Fyodor's plans and logic are very interesting to me

So new chapter dropped and I wanted to look at Fyodor's conversation with Fukuzawa and his plan to eradicate ability users plays into hijacking Fukuchi's plan.

So Fyodor comes out swinging and immediately tells Fukuchi's dream of peace through a union of man (that Fukuzawa insists Fyodor stole...) is not feasable.

Notably Fyodor mentions that it is an "Unlearned outlook befitting of your short lives." This confirms that Fyodor's lifespan has been, as suspected, far longer than that of a normal man, likely hundreds of years (earliest confirmed sighting in the mid-1400s). It also confirms that because of his age Fyodor feels he is more learned and knowledgeable of a solution to humanity's divisiveness because of his longer lifespan. Mentioning the 'modern state' framework only being from around the 1700s also confirms his longer life span.

The key thing he mentions about the 'modern state' is that it's simply a 'toddling promise', confirming that he does not believe that the framework of a unified state is enough to keep the peace. He thinks that the framework of states will very heavily change, perhaps by government affairs moving to the private sector or extraterrestrial communities. Either way, new divisions will be created and cause conflict. And according to Fyodor there will always be those who will try and create these divisions - the new 'us' vs 'them' dynamics.

Fukuzawa meanwhile believes that humanity will be able to unite through 'benevolence' (kindness/well meaning) and 'virtue' (high moral standards). He holds the idea that if humans listen to their own morals they will be able to fully unite, by Fyodor says that this is the 'fatal flaw' of both Fukuzawa and Fukuchi. Fukuzawa's wholehearted belief in the goodness of others links well to his running of the ADA - helping his subordinates control their abilities in order to do good for the community, even hiring ex-mafia members. It is also Fukuzawa's belief in the goodness of others that has a huge impact of his relationship with Fukuchi. It is Fukuchi's belief in the goodness of others that fuels his plan, and his belief in the goodness of Fukuzawa in making him the theoretical leader of mankind.

However, Fyodor believes that despite their idealised views of man, mankind cannot bear this consistent high moral standard. How people cannot necessarily always follow their moral compass due to societal pressure - choosing the 'status quo' and whatever is easier for them over morals and kindness. He thinks that common people will not stand for a worldwide dictatorship, no matter how kind their leader, and would lead a revolution against the 'nation of man' for the sake of independence, starting the divisions and cycle of violence again.

The painting referenced is 'Liberty Leading the People' by Eugène Delacroix (thanks to @kyouka-supremacy 's post for pointing me in the right direction), a French Romantic artist. It is depicting the July Revolution of 1830, where a group of revolutionaries helped remove a constitutional monarchy (a monarchy with other advisors and a constitution (laws/rules) to follow) and replace it with a new system. (apologies for the vague explanations I'm not knowledgeable on this topic, I highly recommend you look into it yourselves if you're interested in further details). These events mirror Fyodor's theories of a group of people rising up to take down the system of the worldwide union of man and replace it with new divisions, causing the cycle of violence to re-emerge.

Fyodor actually turns Fukuzawa own belief system on its head with the example of Fukuchi's promise to only k!ll 500 people (and no more) to implement his plan of world peace. Since Fukuzawa isn't confidently able to verify this, it shows that people can be able to take advantage of those who express only kindness to their fellow man through lies or falsely forged trusts. This shows that the reliance on benevolence and virtue leaves the system of a union of mankind vulnerable to exploitation, meaning it is not foolproof enough to stand in the realm of feasibility.

Fyodor then goes to talk about how he is following Fukuchi's goals of world peace as his 'successor' or 'disciple'. I want to make special note of the use of 'disciple' due to its religious connotations, and Fyodor is also consistently paired with religious imagery. The religious connotations are strengthen by the fact that Fukuchi's body is currently the vessel for the Divine Being Amenogozen, a higher-dimensional being that appears god-like in its immense strength and powers.

Fyodor's idea of creating peace is by starting a world war between non-superpowered humans and ability users. He has used Fukuchi's vampire outbreak plan (and usage of the One Order) to show the humans the danger of ability users (and the ways to utilise One Order as well), creating/strengthening an 'us' vs 'them' mentality between the two. [Note last month's chapter's colour spread of Atsushi and Akutagawa - the quote it uses is "Fear of the enemy shall always drive us to take up arms." The people's fear of ability users shall cause them to turn of war.] This is ultimately going to cause a conflict between the two groups, using the 'hideousness of man' to bring peace to humanity, as he thinks humanity will be united after it rids the world of ability users. This idea could be founded in what he has seen in his lifespan, or founded from his own hatred of ability users. Either way the plan entails his own ideology against ability users emerging from the collapse of civilisation (saw a tweet talking about this being many characters' motivations like Fitzgerald and Agatha Christie as well).

Fyodor intends to use the more 'evil' elements of humanity to create world peace - the 'hideousness of man', which can entail their thirst for violence, the creation of conflict. Fukuchi (and by some extent Fukuzawa) intended that the inherent goodness of man would prevail - 'benevolence' and 'virtue', everyone caring for and looking out for their fellow man. They have polar opposite philosophies on the inherent morality of mankind which drive their solutions to the political matters at hand in pursuit of world peace.

Fyodor mentions this world peace either being around a thousand years long or on the next page "eternal peace". It may be purposeful to do so, as it could bring questioning to how founded/unfounded his philosophy/plan is.

"Such opposition, coupled with the threads of abhorrence, shall give rise to a united humanity." - The divide between everyday humans and ability users is strengthened through digust/repulsiveness of humans towards ability users will unite humanity against a common enemy, therefore creating peace once that enemy has been eliminated.

[I always find it really fun to focus on these types of conversations despite my lack of knowledge on philosophy and stuff like that but they are genuinely interesting. Once I find a way to read the new Yuumori chapter I could do something similar if anything really interesting comes up... i've also got an arcane s2 post in the drafts that I may or may not post, it's a long one about episodes 7-9 but idk if my points are all that good..]

[ochipi]

Opinions needed!

I’m on a train of thought and I need fellow passengers

Context: I’m a Belgian archaeologist, art historian and currently studying heritage. Many of my classes include museology and de-colonising museums which is relevant due to the colonisation of Rwanda, Burundi and especially Congo. Also case studies about the Benin Bronzes and the Elgin marbles.

I had to read an article about the restitution of stolen art which talked about the Benin Bronzes and the Elgin marbles. In that same timeframe, I watched a video about the last craftsmen skilled in making Benin Bronzes by Business Insider.

The craftsman in the video mentions how he applauds the Nigerian government for its efforts in trying to get the historic bronzes back to Nigeria, but what struck me the most was his plea for the same amount of attention for modern craftsmen because the craft today is disappearing.

It reminded me of the second time I visited Rwanda and went to the Ethnographic Museum in Butare (Institute of National Museums Rwanda), where there was one story about a Rwandan form of high jumping which is now lost to colonialism, and another instance was a display of Rwandan cultural artefacts AND a woman doing beadwork in the museum.

I started reflecting back to the museums I know in Belgium and to an extension the whole of Europe. We have two types of museums; the first is the art museum which is paint on canvas, the second is the (national) museum for cultural history. Optionally are archaeological museums.

It made me think (bear with me). Art museums (which include modern art in the same building) are very lovely. You always hear about it: new exhibition, new special piece required, once in a lifetime view of… “Old” and contemporary works are exhibited together. How subject A influenced subject B. Look at how style developed. Look at how subjects/clients/social constructs/… developed. Look at the beauty of Jan van Eyck and the Ghent altarpiece and now look at Bruegel and Rubens 100 years later.

Cultural history museums, as big as they are, are usually very … dead. You can visit once, see what there is to see and then not visit again in four years and everything is still very much the same. Although many museums have made an effort in saying “yes these things were required because of colonialism”, it’s usually limited to a plaque somewhere and maybe a photograph which in time was like “look how cool I am looting these things” with a description now saying “see how not cool it is to loot these things”. None of this includes excuses, restitution, exchange of art,… nothing.

Cultural history museums are sort of frozen in time. The - we don’t know what to do with ourselves- kind of exhibitions floating between “look at the cool stuff we have” and the unease of how they got them.

All the artefacts are sitting there as meaningless objects from a bygone era. As objects from a place that no longer exists, made by people that no longer exist for an audience that doesn’t exist. When I go to the Royal Museum for Central Africa near Brussels, I see many objects from predominantly Congo (DRC) with an audience that is barely worthy of being called African or coloured for that matter.

UNESCO is so adamant we preserve intangible heritage, the UN prioritises including third world countries in the equation and promote sustainable development. None of this helps in dealing with post-colonialism.

I don’t claim that any of what I’m writing below will be the solution, but I may dare to argue that some of these actions do fit within the UNESCO conventions we all massively agreed on.

Take for instance the craftsman making Benin Bronzes in modern day Nigeria. None of their work is in a museum. They have to sell their work on the roadside. Can you imagine buying a Warhol on the roadside? Protect local/traditional craftsmen with labels similar to the ones used exuberantly by World Heritage sites (f.e. Pyramids at Gizeh, UNESCO 1972’s “list”).

Cultural history museums should buy current art producing people’s work because art is not just limited to painted canvas, maybe marble statues. Art is everything. We can have old and new paintings together, but we refuse to bring old and new bronzes, marbles, baskets, instruments … together. Even going as far as excluding African modern art (which is fantastic) into western museums.

Make cultural history museums alive again. Let them show change in time too! The colonialist nation state no longer exists, why should we pretend that cultural history collections are made for colonising nations? Presenting looted artefacts like we are doing now almost feels like saying “we won over you”, we make African culture a thing from the past. Something that no longer exists, that’s why it is in a museum. It’s fictionalising different cultures, similar to people now being surprised that native Americans still exist.

We have painted artworks in museums almost immediately after they are made nowadays. Yet with “artefacts”, we insist on making them archaeological. “Old, no where to be found in practice today, no way of recovering the why’s and how’s.” They were dead and we are making them as reanimating, “saving” as much as we can.

African, Asian, South American and Native American cultures are not dead needing to be revived by a white formerly colonising museum institute.

Invite people over to display their craft, have guided tours by people from those places, let them tell the story, show what decolonisation looks like, show what reconnection looks like, support young talent... Have traditional Rwandan geometric painted art next to a contemporary Rwandan artist’s work. Have people come over to tell traditional and modern stories! Protect oral culture! Pay them the price their art is worth! If we can pay millions for Van Gogh, why not pay 100$ US for a contemporary Benin Bronze?

The west is so comfortable with having its painted artworks around the world, in hands of oligarchs, royal families, industrial magnates exchange them or have them on loan everywhere, yet with art we DIDN’T EVEN MAKE OURSELVES, we’re like “but it’s ours now. It’s here now.” The International Council Of Museums is sleeping on thousands of opportunities. Museum goers are no longer just the white, from-that-nation-derived audience. Countries are now multi-cultural, multi-colored, multi-curious. Accommodate those people. They want to see cool stuff too, they want to see old and new art from around the world too. Why not from their parent's places too?

So my basic question. Am I talking nonsense with this? Is this still a coloniser’s view? Are any of the points I made valuable? Opinions? Additions? Roast me even, this is important stuff. We need things to change. The current paradigm is broken.