#and wish you understood how i feel about the torture like so bad there isn't technically any reason for you not to?

[rinis-rift]

Writing fanfics related to music and song lyrics? Thats so awesome and absolutely my niche, I love the idea. The song I want is Victoria Monet’s Experience, and a rendered pop art scenario with Jinu and a gn reader going on a summer night drive together, because this song is on my playlist for him, and I always imagine it everytime I listen to it. Just him and the reader laughing and racing along somewhere like Busan late at night, next to the beach in the summer sunset as they drink soda together. (Although I do wonder if he would have a drivers lisence since he’s technically a 400 year old demon, would he know how to drive?) anyways thanks for putting together such a lovely event!

Experience

ꕥ Rendered Pop Art Request!

Gn!Reader x Jinu (fluffy oneshot)

extra: thanks for the request! i don't think i'm great at dialogue so this was a bit of a challenge, but i tried my hardest to make it seem fluid, we're just gonna assume that he does know how to drive- ALSO THIS SONG IS SO GOOD- I WILL CRASH A CAR FOR THE VIBES

i feel like this isn't my best work so i feel really bad because this is ur niche and all.. but i hope you like what i have to offer..

100 Follower's Event

It wasn’t often that the feeling of freedom graced the nerves of Jinu. After all, he’s doomed and been doomed to a fate worse than death- being a soul collector, being tortured by his past actions- you get the point.

And falling in love didn’t make anything easier, but he couldn’t resist- it was you. And when you kept inviting him out on joy rides across Busan, how could he say no?

Out in the early morning hours when the moon was still high in the sky, you both drove in a car that neither of you owned. Jinu stole one of those hoodless cars to impress you, and at this hour, with a charmer like him, didn’t bother questioning anything.

You shrugged and hopped in, grinning from ear to ear as the engine revved with a tune, you picked a song to blast and suddenly, the world didn’t matter to either of you anymore. The man with jet black hair wished he wasn’t driving just so he could admire fully how your hair blew back from the wind.

From the fresh winds to the peaceful atmosphere, nothing but your favorite songs playing along with a man you adored driving past scenes people would die for, everything said sounded more funny.

The both of you laughed so hard at every little horrible joke, your cheeks hurt from grinning, who knew the leader of the Saja boys had humor? There was nothing to be stiff about, just you and him under the starry skies.

“Wait wait! Turn here, I wanna see the bridge,” You requested, turning to him, Jinu didn’t have an idea of what you meant, but nonetheless, he obeyed, what you wanted to see is what he needed to see.

“A bridge?” He asks lightheartedly, but you take it as a playful challenge, “You don’t know? The Busan harbor is just beautiful, the bridge lights up at night, and gives you a glorious sight of the city.” Your eyes shine as you described it, sure, you’ve been before when you were younger, but now you could see it again with Jinu.

Jinu could feel that admiration brimming in your voice, that soft sigh as you laid back in the car seat, it made his heart swell, and silently, he stepped on the gas pedal. He wanted to experience whatever this scenery is, even though deep down in his heart he knows he’d rather look at how the lights looked on you as you stared with big eyes and an amazed expression.

Eventually, you both see it, and you weren’t wrong. 

How the big tower at the center glowed with a bright pink, the metal pipes that acted like strings that held the bridge up were illuminated with gradients that were so well blended, he understood why you wanted to go now. 

He drove on the bridge, and while you were taking pictures and admiring this lightshow from all angles, even taking some badly angled photos of the driver. 

“Isn’t it beautiful?” You ask, leaning your head towards him, that breathless tone in your voice makes Jinu's spiritual heart flutter, and while you were on the edge of his peripheral vision, his entire focus was on you.

“It’s ethereal.” He whispers like a prayer, trying to not make it obvious. You smile at the glittering lights of the city, then you turn to him and that curl in your lips grows tender. 

Now you both head over to the beach to end off the night, buying some carbonated drinks, sodas of both your liking, Jinu felt greedy and bought his own drink of Soda Pop, you smacked him on the back.

Relocated to the sand by the sea, you sit on the soft ground. Both of you looked up at the shimmering sky, chatting about more intimate things- shitty exes, glossed over family history, first or recent partners, gossiping about those that’re in your life.

Cracking immature jokes that only teens could get away with, you both were rolling over with laughter. 

“So that son of a bitch basically did all of that, just to fucking avoid me- seriously, they didn’t even look me in the eye when I confronted them about it!” You raged, taking another drink of the fizzy drink, it 

You rolled your eyes up to the moon, mood souring at the talking of your ex. “That fuckass pressured and gaslit me to do anything and everything romantic while they sat on their ass the entire time we were together.”

“Yeah well, love’s no pressure when they actually care and tend to you.” Jinu rolls his eyes, while he kept that cool guy persona, inside he was disgusted at what your ex partner did- or didn’t do for you.

“If only that hoe tried- wasted so much on them.” You groaned, resting your head on Jinu’s shoulder for support. Inside, Jinu’s pulse picked up, that soft and tired look on your face, glinting in the moonlight- you were really enchanting.

“Love is an experience, and it seems like you got the short end of it,” he brushes it off. You scoff and playfully rolled your eyes. You mutter under your breath about something about him playing the smart guy role.

“Yeah well, bitches ain’t shit these days.” You cuss, disregarding how many curses that were flying out of your mouth right now.

Jinu raised an eyebrow, “Well, I think you’ll find someone to enjoy experiences with, someone with lots of love.” A small, jokeful lilt in his voice, it prompts you to say, “Like who? You?”

The man shrugs and turns to you, “To be fair,” suddenly he’s holding your chin in his hands, a tilt in his head that, with the moonlight, made him look more dreamy.

“I’m all out of love because you took it away.” He confesses in a voice and tone that you’d love to experience over and over again.

im doubting my writing skills so much

IM SO SORRY ANON IF I DIDN'T DO IT JUSTICE :((

[gritandoengay]

I really wish to understand your perspective. And I will try to explain what we say because there are unfair misconceptions. We're not mad at Caitlyn for being flawed.

If people really understood how bad Caitlyn’s actions were and if it's really about forgiveness, I don’t get why they spend so much time blaming Ambessa or saying Caitlyn was manipulated. Her growth doesn’t mean much if nobody is willing to accept that she's responsible for her actions.

And said growth feels fake in the jail scene. Jinx is locked in a cold, dark, filthy cell, barefoot, wounded, isolated, and emotionally shattered. She’s clearly not a threat. And bringing Jinx a tray of food is treated like it’s some huge act of mercy. Is it a great gesture to not let a starving girl die in your dungeon?

But she throws the condescending line at her, "No amount of good deeds can undo our crimes" like Jinx should be grateful and start apologizing. Jinx’s actions and Caitlyn’s are not even on the same level. Caitlyn uses this false equivalence to put herself and Jinx in the same boat when she’s the one representing systemic oppression and violence.

And during the fight, Piltover was in danger too so it doesn't count as her protecting Zaun (because aside from this fight there's 0 attempts at repairing the damage she caused even though she has the money to do so).

We’re not mad at Caitlyn as a character. We’re mad at people who ignore the bigger picture aka how she represents real systemic oppression.

- They don't care about all the Zaunites who were gassed, tortured and imprisoned because of her and who got no justice.

-They invalidate what Zaunites went through by saying they deserved it because they're all criminals.

- Amanda Overton said that Vi needed get over her all cops are evil mindset which is incredibly disrespectful to Vi as a character and to people in the audience (because Vi's trauma represents what happened to real people and telling that the solution is to essentially ignore police brutality because "not all cops" is outrageous).

Caitlyn being morally grey isn't the problem. The real issue is her refusal to take responsibility for the systemic violence she enacts, while her defenders excuse her actions and engage in toxic behavior such as bullying Reed Shannon, creating offensive art (the George Floyd one), invalidating Vi’s pain, and dismissing Zaunites’ suffering as if Caitlyn’s life matters more than theirs all combined.

If she truly has changed then fine; she's a redeemed fascist. But don’t erase what she actually did. Her actions were absolutely fascist, and that’s not up for debate. I could write an entire paragraph breaking down how she embodies several fascist tactics. I think a lot of you are reluctant to call her that because admitting the truth makes it harder to forgive her.

But again it could be possible to like her if there was less hypocrisy. The same way some appreciate really shitty characters.

Alright, there's a lot to unpack here, let's get to it.

I'm going to start with this: I don't speak for the entirety of the Caitlyn/CaitVi fandom or voted to elect some kind of representative. "Other people say this" and "Other people do this" - I don't speak for those people, and they don't speak for me. I'm going to answer you with my thoughts and interpretations, I shouldn't be expected to respond for every other take out there on the internet from Caitlyn/CaitVi fans, especially when it's such a huge fandom.

"If people really understood how bad Caitlyn’s actions were and if it's really about forgiveness, I don’t get why they spend so much time blaming Ambessa or saying Caitlyn was manipulated. Her growth doesn’t mean much if nobody is willing to accept that she's responsible for her actions."

It is a fact though that Ambessa took advantage of Caitlyn's grief and anger. Yes, at the end of the day Caitlyn let herself be led down that path and has to answer for her actions, which she does, but how are we not supposed to talk about Ambessa's role in this when the show makes it blatantly clear that Ambessa manipulates Caitlyn to serve her own interests? Why are you minimizing Ambessa's character?

"And said growth feels fake in the jail scene. Jinx is locked in a cold, dark, filthy cell, barefoot, wounded, isolated, and emotionally shattered. She’s clearly not a threat. And bringing Jinx a tray of food is treated like it’s some huge act of mercy. Is it a great gesture to not let a starving girl die in your dungeon?"

Jinx turned herself in. I also don't know what you expected to be done with the terrorist that had murdered half the council? Like, regardless of how justified you might think her actions were and how bad you're feeling for Jinx in that moment (I was too, you're supposed to), there's no way Piltover was going to put the person responsible for murdering council members in a 5 star hotel room. I didn't even know there was discourse around this, but that just goes to show that I'm right to stay away from the other apps.

Anyway, no, Caitlyn bringing Jinx food wasn't some grand act of mercy. You know what was? Letting Jinx, her mother's murderer, go. That seems like a pretty big act of mercy if you ask me.

"But she throws the condescending line at her, "No amount of good deeds can undo our crimes" like Jinx should be grateful and start apologizing. Jinx’s actions and Caitlyn’s are not even on the same level. Caitlyn uses this false equivalence to put herself and Jinx in the same boat when she’s the one representing systemic oppression and violence."

I mean, Caitlyn was clearly also referring to herself when she says that, and yes, the show is right to establish an equivalence between them.

I'm sorry, but Jinx being a Zaunite doesn't absolve her of having kidnapped, psychologically tortured, and murdered people - including other Zaunites! I know you're viewing this purely from an "oppressor vs oppressed" perspective, but even from that angle, Jinx was part of Zaun's ruling class under Silco (we're not getting into him, but suffice to say, the guy wasn't the revolutionary hero some parts of the fandom paint him to be) and helped him inflict suffering on the people in Zaun. Hell, the Firelights are formed as a resistance group to the Enforcers and Silco.

I don't blame Jinx for having been raised and manipulated by Silco, but I'm also not going to sit here and pretend she didn't do some fucked up stuff. So, I categorically refuse to believe that Caitlyn's actions are worse than Jinx's. I don't judge characters purely on how big their bank accounts are or how poor they were growing up. If you expect me to agree that Caitlyn's actions were exponentially worse than everybody else's in a show where other characters are out here murdering innocent people, using child slaves, experimenting on children (Deckard), explicitly murdering children, kidnapping others, violently running drug empires, trying to eradicate all of human existence, etc., then idk what to tell you at that point. No, they're not.

"And during the fight, Piltover was in danger too so it doesn't count as her protecting Zaun (because aside from this fight there's 0 attempts at repairing the damage she caused even though she has the money to do so)."

I mean...did you want Caitlyn to shout that she was doing this for Zaun too? Is that an expectation you have for any of the other Piltover characters involved in that battle?

Caitlyn literally gives her Council seat to Sevika. That's a pretty big deal if you ask me, but I'm sure she's also signing some checks (this is pretty common in CaitVi fics btw, Caitlyn using the Kiramman fortune to help Zaun) on the side if you're angry that wasn't included in an epilogue lol.

"We’re not mad at Caitlyn as a character. We’re mad at people who ignore the bigger picture aka how she represents real systemic oppression."

I don't know how to address this properly because like....she's just a single character? How can Caitlyn, by herself, represent real systemic oppression? She benefits from it and she contributes to it in varying degrees, but she's not even the only character that benefits from or contributes to it. Power is one of the core themes of Arcane, and we see several characters wield it in different ways, often perpetuating harmful systems. To pin it all on Caitlyn is incredibly reductive of several other characters and the show itself.

I'll tell you what Caitlyn represents: Caitlyn represents what happens when people that believe firmly in noble ideals are actually tested - and then fail. She represents how, even when you strive to be righteous and be guided by justice, you can harm others and end up becoming the thing you purported to be fighting against (this is something we see in Silco too btw). Caitlyn didn't go along with the martial law because she woke up and said "Today I will do bad things" or "Time to oppress Zaun." No, she did it because in her mind, that was the only way to catch Jinx, and thus achieve justice for her mother's death and take down this violent terrorist that has killed other people too.

I saw a post somewhere that broke down really well (shame that I can't find it now) how Caitlyn's ideals don't actually change from season 1 to season 2. She's actually incredibly consistent in her core beliefs throughout the series, but she clearly goes about it the wrong way in season 2. She's an example of "the road to hell is paved with good intentions" (just one of several characters in the show, it's one of the reasons Arcane is compelling).

"- They don't care about all the Zaunites who were gassed, tortured and imprisoned because of her and who got no justice."

Again, I don't know who this "they" are. If you have a grievance with other people in the fandom, then take it up with them, but I've never said it was right to gas or imprison Zaunites.

"-They invalidate what Zaunites went through by saying they deserved it because they're all criminals."

I mean, I do think that the chembarons were dangerous criminals, they harmed and benefited from oppressing other Zaunites as well. The series goes out of its way to paint most of them as cartoonish villains that we shouldn't feel sympathy for, so I don't feel sympathy for them. The reason why it was wrong to use the grey is because it ended up affecting innocents too. Don't think we're in disagreement here.

"- Amanda Overton said that Vi needed get over her all cops are evil mindset which is incredibly disrespectful to Vi as a character and to people in the audience (because Vi's trauma represents what happened to real people and telling that the solution is to essentially ignore police brutality because "not all cops" is outrageous)."

I haven't watched the clip so idk what exactly Amanda said. I think she was referring to season 1 when Vi learns to trust Caitlyn despite Caitlyn being an enforcer (she's said so in previous interviews), but it seems like she could have worded it much better and can see why people are upset.

"Caitlyn being morally grey isn't the problem. The real issue is her refusal to take responsibility for the systemic violence she enacts, while her defenders excuse her actions and engage in toxic behavior such as bullying Reed Shannon, creating offensive art (the George Floyd one), invalidating Vi’s pain, and dismissing Zaunites’ suffering as if Caitlyn’s life matters more than theirs all combined."

Caitlyn does take responsibility, she verbally admits it and then backs up her words with actions. I assume you're here because you saw this post, in which case, I'm not going to share all those quotes again, but all of this is in the text. You're just flat out wrong if your claim is that she refuses to take responsibility.

I don't agree with any bullying of any VA's, I had no idea about the offensive art but it sounds fucked up, I've never invalidated Vi's pain (not sure what exactly you mean with this), and I've never claimed that "Caitlyn's life matters more than all Zaunite's combined." Not sure why I'm being asked to answer for the actions of other people in a huge fandom, but no, I don't agree with any of those things. I sincerely hope you're not implying that these people represent the entirety of or even most Caitlyn/CaitVi fans.

"If she truly has changed then fine; she's a redeemed fascist. But don’t erase what she actually did. Her actions were absolutely fascist, and that’s not up for debate. I could write an entire paragraph breaking down how she embodies several fascist tactics. I think a lot of you are reluctant to call her that because admitting the truth makes it harder to forgive her."

Oh boy. We can spend hours talking about the definition of fascism, but no, in terms of ideology and beliefs, Caitlyn wouldn't be considered a fascist. She does go along with tactics that fascist leaders have used in their regimes (martial law, the flags and posters if you want to count that as propaganda), I'll give you that, but Caitlyn does not give speeches about the inherent superiority of Piltover over Zaun and how we must eradicate the Zaunite vermin. There are other characters in Arcane that you can argue are fascist by your parameters, but I don't want those complaints in my inbox.

This is already long enough and I rather go back to binging Bad Bunny, everybody stop discoursing and watch the video for NUEVAYoL instead.

[the-oracle-of-the-lost]

For the ask game: Keiko and Odo

ask game here!

Keiko:

Sexuality Headcanon: bisexual just because i tend to think most characters are bi unless i'm given reason to believe otherwise.

Gender Headcanon: cis woman.

Ship: it can be a little frustrating how Keiko is almost exclusively written as The Wife but i still do really like Keiko/Miles and the realism of their marriage and assorted problems. it feels honest without ever needing to portray one of them as a bad spouse.

BROTP: Kira & Keiko! i could be talked into their dynamic being somewhat romantic but honestly i would just like to see more of their platonic relationship and i think the two characters have the possibility of complementing each other well

NOTP: uh i don't think i've ever seen a Keiko ship that i've outright hated? i'm sure they exist but i'm struggling to think of any.

Random Headcanon: Keiko is a civilian scientist (as far as i understood it at least) but i like to think that Jadzia isn't great with plants (i mean she's juggling every other scientific discipline, there have to be a few that slipped through the cracks) so every once in awhile if there's some plant emergency she calls in Keiko to lead the mission and they have some fun science bonding time.

General Opinion: i like Keiko a lot! i'd probably have more opinions about her if she had more screentime (with a bigger variety of characters) but as is – she's good, i don't have a ton to say.

Odo:

Sexuality Headcanon: hard to say because i don't think Changelings really have the same conceptions of sexuality than humans (and most Star Trek aliens) have. but he's probably demisexual & pan?

Gender Headcanon: i'm trying to make a gender fluid joke but no in all honestly i think he's agender by human standards given that much like sexuality, Changelings don't really seem to Do Gender.

Ship: i think it could have been executed in canon better (i find myself saying this a lot for Star Trek ships...) but i do like Odo/Kira. i will also admit to liking Odo/Quark but not particularly seriously.

BROTP: idk if you can count Odo & Quark's thing as a friendship but... sure? i also really wish we got to see more Odo & Garak stuff from after Garak tortures him and they make up in The Die is Cast. also a big fan of Odo & Worf's aut4aut energy.

NOTP: again i can't really think of an Odo ship that i particularly dislike? i'm sure there are some but none that i've encountered in the wild.

Random Headcanon: while Odo's shapeshifting skills canonically never really change throughout the series, i like to think that they do and he can start to mimic certain people but only after spending a lot of time around them (by the end of the series – he can do a pretty good Kira, a passable Quark, and everyone else is... getting there but still a bit flat).

General Opinion: i'm a big Odo fan, including his flaws which i view as essential to his story and the central tragedy of his character never fully being able to escape the specter of his people nor ever being able to find a home the way he wants. also just a big fan of introducing a shapeshifter and having his main color palette be beige and also he's bad at shape-shifting. 10/10 character right there.

[baldurs-gate-official]

Ok I just need to vent for a sec because I finished my Romanced/non-ascended Astarion run and gosh

As someone who suffers from severe PTSD... this means a lot to me. I've seen so many characters in media with PTSD where the condition isn't taken seriously/written poorly, or the only 'happy ending' they get is death.

But this... This is nice. The life I've lived is abnormal. I don't talk about it much because most people either wouldn't believe it, or might feel bad just for hearing it. I've survived torture, starvation, attempted murder, and I'm only just coming out of a lifetime of that. I was trapped for ages. Years. So many years. It's made it hard to trust people, or feel genuinely cared for. And being able to play a character on the other side of that, as someone confronted with a person traumatized and tasting freedom for the first time... and being able to help them, despite the difficulties, and get them to a place of safety and happiness is... I don't even know what word to use. It makes me feel hopeful, in a way. Seen. Understood a little.

And his reaction to freedom and safety! While it's not exactly like my own, it's so close. And I've never seen that feeling represented before. Safety is terrifying! Trusting people is terrifying! It feels impossible to believe anyone would genuinely stick with you while you work it all out.

When you go through a life of trauma, there's no such thing as safety. You get so used to the danger that going without it is the most terrifying thing in the world. Your brain and body can't comprehend that there isn't a threat. Before I escaped my situation, I knew there was always danger. I was always prepared for it, I was used to it, and knew how to tell when and how I needed to react. Being scared is familiar. It's a crutch, almost. The fear keeps you alert and alive. But... when the source of that fear is gone, you're left with this horrible feeling that the danger hasn't passed - you just can't see where it's coming from or what shape it'll take.

It's numbing. But a weird numbness. You flip between that and deep periods of, 'Oh fuck oh god, all of that really happened and now I have to pick up the pieces and live with it'.

Seeing someone else going through that, and being able to say the things I wish someone would tell me (and not even realize I needed to hear it until after) feels so good in the most aching way possible.

And the Cazador scene! There's one part at the start that hits so hard:

That last line is everything I wish I could say to my own parents. I was punished for everything. Anything I did was an excuse to hurt me, even something as simple as showing an emotion or reacting to the pain. But when I escaped it all, and my father tried to pull me back, he tried to frame it like he'd done it all for my own good. That I was the one at fault, and failed despite his best efforts to 'help' me.

I wish I had the courage to yell those words at him, instead of trying to keep peace and make myself meek. "Fuck you and fuck everything you've ever done to me". I feel that in my soul. I want to scream it at him until my lungs hurt and I can't breathe.

And his ending... He can't stay in the sun anymore. It hurts him. It'll affect him for the rest of his life. But he has someone who cares for him, who will stay with him despite that, who doesn't view it as a hindrance. I can't even describe how that makes me feel. I have wounds from what was done to me that will never truly heal, and until now I've always thought of it as a flaw that would make me unlovable. As odd as it is... Him not being able to go in the sun makes it an even happier ending for me? Yes, it hurts and it sucks. But... He's not alone. Part of him believes you'll leave him now that he's confined to the shadows. Proving him wrong feels like a final affirmation that, yes, you're really staying with him. It's real, and he won't be alone. Everything will be okay, despite the pain.

Anyways thanks for coming to my traumadump. I really wish Larian would give us more opportunities to hug Astarion.

[sil-writes-fiction-too]

The Weight of the Truth

June of Doom, day 17: "You don't want to do that"/Blackmail (late entry, @juneofdoom )

Genre: angst

CW: bodily harm, gore, blood, torture, death

A/N: the events of this one-shot take place before the events of BG3. It was a little challenging to write because when the campaign took place I wasn't smart enough to take good, detailed notes of the events that went down in each session. Essentially I have a bunch of bits and pieces of Summer's story that are barely connected to each other and now I have to re-invent a lot of that stuff. It's quite frustrating, but hopefully the result isn't too bad.

Empty.

Summer feels completely, utterly empty as she stares at the blood that stains her hands. Honestly, she should've expected this. Revenge tastes bitter when you sacrifice your integrity and the fate of your friends to obtain it.

She knew what she would be giving up when she struck up the deal, and yet it didn't stop her. She needed that woman gone, wanted to make her pay for what she's done to her. She knows how selfish this all is... and yet here she sits, in front of Lady Ashes' mangled corpse as she contemplates the horrible consequences of her actions.

Just two days ago an angel descended from the heavens to eliminate her. It knew about her deal with Asmodos, and if only that blasted thing hadn't underestimated the sheer, raw power of her magic, it would've easily taken her life... and perhaps even her friends'. How long until something like that happens again? Until her companions are caught up in her mess and suffer its consequences?

No... what is she even talking about? They were already caught up in this mess from the moment Summer started selling information to Asmodos and running his errands, deceptively making them look like part of their mission so that her friends wouldn't question her. The terms of her deal prevent her from having to directly harm her group, but let's face it... what she is doing right now isn't any better.

Now Lady Ashes is finally gone, both from the Material Plane and The Creator's realm. After Summer manages to intercept her lackeys before they get to her parents in Ferox, her wretched schemes will never hurt anyone ever again. She got what she wanted, but as the thrill of the kill subsides and that feeling of liberation dissipates... she can't even attempt to feel any happiness for what she's done.

If her soul usually burns as hot as the fire of the Hells, right now it feels more like a frozen lake, silent and dead.

She got what she wanted, but at what cost? Her allies, her friends, still trust her with their lives every single day, not knowing that she is nothing more than a filthy traitor. Not knowing that under her mischievous smile hides the rot of guilt and betrayal. What breaks her heart even more is the fact that the people she travels with are all wonderful individuals and that some of them would even forgive her if they ever found out. Hells, Jaime outright told her that he would've understood wanting to take the deal. That she was a better person than him for refusing. Those words almost make her want to vomit now. She is not better than him, and perhaps she isn't even a good person to begin with.

Arwen is a good person, she deserves those words. She didn't even have to think before she refused Asmodos' pact. Summer wishes she could be like her. Strong and resolute in her way of doing things, rather than being pulled left and right by her volatile emotions and diving in before thinking, unlike her.

Arwen... what would she say if she found out? Would she abandon her? Kill her? She wouldn't blame her if that was the case. Somehow, out of everyone in the group, she is the one Summer is most scared of if she was to find out the truth. Not because of her reaction... but because Summer dreads the idea of hurting her like that.

Hah, but perhaps she is only scared of being caught, because if she truly didn't want to hurt her, then she wouldn't have done this to begin with!

Summer hangs her head in shame, letting out a shaky sigh. “Fuck...”

“My, my... I thought you'd be celebrating by now, my dear. Isn't the vampire's death what you wanted all along?” Says Asmodos' deep, gravelly voice from the darkness. “Surely you've had your fun tonight...” he comments with a glance towards the woman's remains as he finally walks out of the shadows, his large, black wings stretching and then folding down again behind his broad back. “I expected more appreciation for the gift I've given you...” he tuts.

A scoff leaves Summer's mouth as she looks up at the devil with no fear in her yellow eyes. “What do you want, Asmodos?” She spits with disgust, her tail flicking behind her irritatedly. He rolls his eyes in response to her little outburst. “Why, I am merely here to enjoy the sight...” Summer doesn't know if he is referring to the dead prisoner... or to the despair that's surely written all over her face right now... but she has a feeling it might be the second thing. “And to remind you of your little mission, of course. You still need to get rid of the mind flayer-” “I don't want to do this anymore..” She interrupts, and Asmodos' face turns dark. “What was that?”

“I said...” she gets up off the floor, standing her ground as she stares into his equally yellow eyes. “I don't want to do this anymore, so I am not gonna. I already gave you what you wanted, and I got what I required. This ends here. I am not going to do your little errands anymore, and if you have a problem with that, we can settle it right here, right now.” She growls defiantly, her hand already reaching for her dagger.

Asmodos stands still, looking down at her in silence and with an unreadable expression on his face. She thinks he must be at least twice as big as the orcs she had to face off against a month ago. He is massive, and powerful too... There's no way she can actually survive in a fight against him, but if that's what it's going to take to finally get away from his clutches and stop putting her friends in danger, then so be it. She is ready.

“You don't want to do that.” The flat tone of his voice makes a shiver run down her spine. “Actually, I think I do.” She tries to keep her voice as still as possible, but the more he stalls the less confident she feels.. “No, you really don't, little girl.” He narrows his eyes at her. “Did you really think I would kill you so easily? Oh, no, my dear... you are much more useful and much more entertaining alive. So if you were hoping for an easy way out, well... I'm afraid you are going to be disappointed.” A smirk curls his lips. “I gave you the whereabouts of Lady Ashes' underlings, and in exchange I asked that you kill the mind flayer. That part of the pact still stands, tiefling, and you will take care of it if you don't want your little friends to find out what you've been doing behind their backs.” His smirk widens, showing off his sharp fangs. Summer can feel her stomach twisting uncomfortably at his words.

“And in case that wasn't enough to get you to do your damn job... I want to remind you that I might've shown interest in dealing with you and your warlock companion, but I have absolutely no use for the rest of your adorable little group. You're still holding the knife that's sticking out of their backs... surely you don't want to finish them off once and for all?” He chuckles darkly and for a moment Summer feels like hurling. “Don't you dare-!!” His wings open suddenly as he steps forward, making her almost jump back. “Oh I will, if you don't do as I say. Don't play hero, Summer... we both know you're nothing more than a wretched beast.” He growls deeply, almost making the air around them vibrate.

“Keep up your little rebellious act and I will tell your group how you've betrayed them for the mere opportunity of getting to torture and kill the vampire. Then, I will kill all of your friends one by one, slowly and painfully, and I'll make you watch every single second of it. After that, it will be your family's turn and, well... who knows what I'll do with you then? I have yet to decide, but I can assure you... it will be excruciatingly agonizing.” He hisses a mere two centimeters from her face, and Summer feels like he is staring right into her soul and picking apart each one of her sins with his scrutinizing gaze. “Do this for me... and all they'll have to worry about is finding a way out of the continent before I demolish it with them still in it. If they manage to survive that far, that is.” He chuckles again, before turning serious once more.

“I know it's horrendously difficult for you, Summer, but... be smart for once. Stop poking your nose where it doesn't belong and leave. You aren't heroes, so don't try to die like you are. You'll be better off washing your hands of this ordeal, trust me.” For a split second, the young tiefling feels like agreeing with the devil. He is right about her, after all.

She is no hero. Hells, the more she goes on the more she feels like a monster with each passing day. She's been selfish in her choice of accepting his deal... what's another act of selfishness now, after all this? But as quick as that thought pops up in her mind, it disappears without a trace, replaced with a burning desire to put a stop to Asmodos' schemes. This is her home, and he doesn't get to destroy it and kill the innocent people that live in it like they were worth nothing. Summer might be a beast, but those people have done nothing to deserve such an end, and if there's anything she can do to spare them that fate, then she will do it.

So she has to do one last thing for him? So be it, but keeping her alive will have been the biggest mistake of his immortal life. She will make sure of it. If she has to go down then she will bring him down with her.

“I want that mind flayer dead by the end of tomorrow. Don't disappoint me.” He peers down at her, unaware of the flurry of thoughts swirling in her mind right now. “Fine. I'll do it.” And as soon as she says that, the darkness dissipates and she finds herself in the little woods just outside of camp once again.

“Good. Keep your head down and do as I say...”

Summer looks around her warily, trying to see if anyone from camp followed her, but no... she is alone. The sky is still dark and everyone else is probably asleep. She must've been in that pocket dimension for at least four hours.

She can still see the fire crackling weakly in the distance, and by the time she gets back to camp she's already made up her mind.

She won't let him win.

[doubleddenden]

Second review of the 3 anime finale on Toonami: Rick and Morty the Anime

I will preface this by saying (and I humbly ask for no personal attacks on this) that I honestly do not like normal Rick and Morty to begin with.

Don't read if you don't vibe with that. RnM fans tend to be very... extra, in some regards, taking too much after Rick- so that's the warning, you'll be in for a bad time if you like the base show and wanna read further.

The reasons I dislike regular RnM is because the art style is gross and ugly for the sake of being gross and ugly, and the writing reeks of depressed nihilistic cynicism that shits all over any character that dares to want something normal or even happy, and the comedy writing is just not really that funny beyond a couple of jokes. I hate Rick- I have seen episodes, multiple before, and I just can NOT stand him. "Oh great you didn't know this very impossible to know thing and now you fucked up, great, real classy, you should feel bad and or kys" or "I personally don't like you and I'm going to make it the multiverse's and my family's problem" are not traits I find admirable (and no, he doesn't really get much better, he's still an asshole no matter how much development he gets). The family isn't really much better tbh and all hate each other, something I hate about modern adult cartoons including the ugly art style and grossness just to be gross. That's just my opinion, I get that people like the show (it's been renewed for like a seasons 8, 9, 10, and 11 already), but I honestly cannot grasp it.

So why watch the anime? Well, it was on Toonami, may as well, and I thought with different writers it might be different too. I did mildly enjoy some of the tone shift from one of the other anime shorts, which made Rick vaguely less of an asshole and more like someone that actually cares about his family beyond how they personally benefit him- so I wanted to give it a shot.

Its............ it's uh..... well, it happened. I think I can say that. That's not good or bad. Just... yeah. Mid.

There's a severe tonal shift from (badly written) adult comedy with an ugly art style that thinks "Morty, we gotta fight the Dick Clenchers of Splotchulon 5, Morty, you'll never guess why they're called that, Morty, its- it's because they clench your dick, Morty. Now help me work on my shit machine that shits actual shit" is funny, to something that REALLY tries to take itself super seriously with a ton of angst and drama- like if Family Guy (also hate it) suddenly tried to make a live action season without its bad comedy and references and instead decided to make a dramatic, murder mystery plot line over a season without a SINGLE joke or flashback, played completely seriously. In other words, it is really unsettling to see a show so disingenuous try to be genuine, but just come across as weird and off putting.

And while I can say I didn't hate some of the aspects of it, I can't say I really enjoyed or understood most of it either. Elle is a pretty fun character for a bit, but doesn't really have much personality beyond being in love with Morty and being some kind of time perceiver. The other characters are also weirdly characterized to be less consistent with their regular counterparts- I mean there's still a couple of moments where Rick is an asshole to Morty or Jerry or where Summer is vaguely a bitch like usual, but otherwise they may as well be completely different characters. I guess the canon material would allow this as an AU in the multiverse, but it's still... weird. Very weird. I would prefer anime Rick over real Rick because again, he's LESS of an asshole and kind of mysterious- but mid overall.

The plot is also weird and overly complex for what it's supposed to be. I mean it's better than a plot device powered by an infinite wall of tortured Morties, but we're talking about some sections that confuse me so much, that Kingdom Hearts makes more sense to me.

I wish I could say the animation and art style were better, but this is like saying a piece of stained printer paper is better than a dirty toilet. The animation is just blocky, and the characters transition weirdly to this style- like it's an anime, but they want to maintain the gross art style of the original in a vague way. Elle is actually just fine and looks cute in both her versions, but she is also directly created for this series and isn't adapted for anything. Idk I know I'm an outsider and some RnM fan is really tempted to tell me to kms over that, but hear me out on this: if your thing is to make an ugly American cartoon into an anime, maybe try making it look genuine instead of weird and off putting. I mean, it worked for the Simpsons Death Note episode.

Personally, I feel like this anime was just made as a way to get around the Writer's Strike from last year. In fact, I half expected from this episode or a future one for the real series to look at this and be like "oh yeah, that'll show the writers to demand a fair wage. Good thing that's not canon, right? Looks like shit. " it does not feel like anybody's best work and serves more like a fan's overly angst filled AU.

Well anyway, a 5/10 feels fine. Mid as fuck.

[apparitionary]

oct 16 2024

things i need to talk about in therapy once im not drowning in school and actually have time to go

muttering under my breath to myself when im anxious or embarrassed about expressing my feelings or how they were interpreted. never loud enough for anyone to hear, never in front of people, but i keep noticing it:

fuck you

you didnt even care

you fucking idiot

how i felt the same level of hopelessness and free fall that i felt when i first started earlier tonight.

still defaulting to "i want my mom" at 21 years old and not being able to cry sometimes until this thought gets in the mix. i am so mature and have always been so mature and i am so fucking smart. i feel ridiculous regressing back in this way. i get so emotional thinking about my childhood and im not sure what to make of it. there was a lot of love but there was so much loneliness. i fear the depth of this loneliness has distorted everything good. i dont know how i was supposed to handle any of it.

i dont know how i was supposed to handle any of it. but more so i dont know how i am supposed to move through a world that has been shaped in such a way. everyone has their own lore and bonding over the similarities is major in not feeling isolated. a lot of times it feels like my experience isn't necessarily so bad its unheard of but so weird and absurd and specific that no one else has really experienced the world the way i am right now. i hate saying it. i dont want to sound like i think im special or uniquely tortured or something. i want to feel normal more than anything, whatever that means to me.

im so scared of dying. recently when im high ive had a few instances of becoming acutely and overwhelmingly aware of my own mortality and the mortality of everyone i love. i am petrified beyond words of how unknown it is. i am even more afraid of the process of aging and becoming aware that you will die soon. my dad is older and its really frightening to me. seeing how the surgery had him down and seeing him not be able to move like he used to is one of the worst things ever.

all i have ever wanted is to be understood and still be loved.

i know im pretty. i cant explain this in relation to why restricting what i eat is such a massive factor for how i feel about myself on a certain day. maybe it all ties back to how i felt as a kid.

sometimes i wish i was exceptionally ugly and deformed so no one would use me for my body anymore. maybe this has something to do with why i cant stop fucking c^tting myself.

I never feel numb but I often feel empty

again. i am so intelligent and capable and independent and self-aware. but oh my god my crux is love. i swear i'll be on my own and its not that i cant handle being on my own its that i have always been such a fucking lover and so starved for understanding and attention. ive always loved love. i have never come by it easily.

[waywardtakami]

- don't leave me

✦pairing: hawks x gn!reader

✦c/w: language, slight mha manga spoilers, 16+ only , angst

✦a/n: hello!! I'm very excited about this fic, it's my first gn one! It's been sitting in my wips for so long and I'm finally happy with it. hopefully people will still read this without there being smut. thank you! <3

✦summary: hawks gets hurt during a mission...

✦w/c: 2k

Keigo had left you again to fight in another mission. He had only been gone for a few days, but you wished he was with you instead. You missed him so much. He hadn't been physically by your side in so long, causing your heart to ache again. Times like these were practically torture. Waking up without him by your side was agonizing, but you were used to it.

His job was all-consuming and you knew him being away for large amounts of time would affect you when you committed yourself to this relationship. There was a constant worry for his life and maybe a little for your own. 

You and Kei decided to keep your relationship as private as possible so no one would go after you. He didn't want anyone to kidnap or hurt you. 

Even though his musk scent was flooded throughout your shared home, you still tried distracting yourself the best you could.

After making your favorite food, you plopped onto the couch and turned on the TV to try and take your mind off him. 

As the TV flickered on, your boyfriend's face flashed across the screen. A gruff voice played over what was being shown. You assumed it was just something about his stats or a recent interview per usual. It didn't help the feeling in your heart subside by seeing him.

You changed the channel, again and again. But every channel had been taken over by the same broadcast. You eventually fixated and listened.

Your heart dropped.

Hawks had been accused of murder. 

"Murder...?" you mumbled to yourself. "No..he...what?" Your heart was beating so fast it felt like it was about to thump out of your chest. You were stuck in a pool of emotions of confusion and immense shock, it was like your head was on fire. 

Dabi...one of the League of Villain members was behind this. All the information you received was from Keigo's colleagues and the media. 

Keigo had been hurt bad...real bad.

The fact that you couldn't do anything about it had you overwhelmed and panicked. When you finally found out which hospital he was brought to through FatGum, you drove yourself there.

Of course he was brought to one one of the furthest ones from where you guys lived. On top of that, traffic was horrendous. With everything that had gone down, the citizens of the city were frantic and trying to get home to their families.

Your hands and entire body practically trembled while driving. Your eyes pricked with tears at the thought of Keigo's wounded state. "He's fine he's fine he's FINE!" You kept telling yourself over and over. 

When you made it to the hospital, there was a large number of people in the waiting room. The sounds of people clamoring in and trying to get a room were deafening. You hurried over to the front desk. 

"Hello Ma'am I need to see Hawks, he should be here." She wouldn't let you in his room. You wanted to see him, no you needed to see him. You started crying, pleading, begging for her to let you go in his room. But the front desk lady apologized and insisted he needed to rest and isn't accepting visitors. 

You knew it was really because she probably thought you were just some fan of his. Or maybe even a reporter trying to sneak in photos. But no, you were his baby, his life, and they weren't going to let you in.

"I'M HIS DAMN PARTNER FOR GOD SAKES!" You yell while slamming your fist against the counter. You didn't realize how much impact you put into your fist until you felt pain in your hand. The waiting room goes almost quiet and heads turn to look at you. You glance back to see all the faces turned to you. 

Your voice softens from embarrassment. "Please...just let me see him." Your fist still against the counter looking at the nurse with tears streaming down your face. 

She stands up and moves closer, "I'm so sorry, I believe you…" She slides a clip board with a few papers attached. "...but we can't let you in just yet he's still recovering from his injuries, he needs to rest right now. Please fill these out while you wait." She looks back up with you with a faint smile. She really does believe you. She can see it in your eyes, the pain, she understood.

You release your hand, and pick up the clipboard. Looking at her on the other side of the counter you give her a face flustered nod and mouth a quick "thank you."

You go sit down comfortably in one of the empty chairs to wait for keigo to wake up...

The news of your wounded boyfriend was already half across Japan. After filling out the forms you scroll through your phone to calm yourself down. You kept seeing post after post about him. Almost all news headlines had his name. 

You think to yourself about how much of it is all bullshit and that he's fine. Deep down you weren't sure if the words your brain kept telling you were true. You click on one of the posts about him that reads: 

"THE NUMBER TWO PRO HERO DEAD" 

Your heart skips a beat, but quickly you realize it's just a fake. You scroll through, lightly skimming the bullcrap you were reading. You scroll and see a photo taken of him the night he was brought to the hospital. You wonder how the press even got a photo of him. You focus on the photo, he does look dead. It only showed his upper body, completely covered in burns. More tears forming at the corners of your eyes just seeing him in the photo. Oh and his wings, his big bright vermilion wings...gone.

You were a complete mess at this point but your sniffles and choked sobs were interrupted by the front desk lady waving to you. "He's awake." 

Quickly following her into the room you see him. As you stand in the doorway for a moment, your heart sinks. You hurry to him. He had bandages wrapped around his head. His hair was short and mostly singed off. And his wings...they really were gone. "I'll leave you two alone," the nurse walks out and closes the door behind her.

You turn back to him.

"Kei?" you whimpered out.

His half lidded eyes look at you. His formerly bright, charming and yellow pupils have become dark and filled with anguish. He was wearing a mask over his nose and mouth with two tubes coming from the sides of it. He couldn't speak or breath himself, due to his throat being burned. 

Of course he knew it was you. Tears welled up deep inside and coursed down his cheeks. Seeing him like this had your body nauseas. You move to cup your hand on his face, feeling the material of his mask rather than his soft subtle skin. You graze your thumb against his cheekbone to wipe away his tears.

You pick up one of his hands to hold it in yours. "Kei….I'm so glad you're okay." You were sniffling through each word. He slowly raises his arm to point to the phone sitting on the table near his hospital bed. Handing it to him, you watch as his calloused fingers type out what he wants to say. 

"Angel, I've missed you so much, please never leave my side." You faintly smile at him, wishing you could hear those words come from his mouth and not the AI voice. 

"I won't leave you Keigo, I'm here, I won't go anywhere."

He types again. "I'm pretty beat up, but I think I'll make it."

Your ears focus on "think" for a moment. "Yes Kei you'll be fine, everything's gonna be okay. You felt a bit better being in his presence but you still couldn't bear the sight of him. Your eyes began to prick with tears once again and this time Kei was the one who bought his hand up to brush your tears away just like you did moments ago. 

You try your best to wrap your arms around him without causing him anymore pain. You could feel him wince when you laid your head against his chest. "Sorry Kei I didn't mean to hur-" He waves his hand and shakes his head, signaling that it's okay.

Your body looked calm despite how tangled your mind was.There were many questions that flooded your mind. So many things you wanted to say. But you could worry about the details later. Right now you were finally with him again, there was no way you were letting him leave you ever again.

You were bent over, upper body on top of him at an awkward position. You didn't want to hurt him, so this had to work.

Despite the position, you took in the moment with your boyfriend. Feeling his chest slowly rise up and down. You close your eyes and imagine you were back home with him in bed. Just snuggling on a weekend afternoon, light shining in on him making his wings light up beautifully against the sun. His golden locks and glowing skin, his scent washing over your senses. Your warm bodies practically glued together. You wanted that again, you wanted everything back to normal.

He moved one of his scarred hands to your back, slowly rubbing up and down. He knew he wasn't going to make it. He was fighting so hard on the inside. So damn hard...for you. He didn't want to leave you, he couldn't. His mind wandered about the life he had planned to have with you.

He faintly smiled under the mask when he imagined you walking down the aisle...holding your first child...sitting in little rocking chairs growing old together. That's all he wanted.

Both of your tears never stopped. You were both silent. The only sounds to be heard were each other's quiet sniffles and the monitor Keigo was attached to, making a faint beep to his heart beat. Still laying on his chest, his breathing started to slow and so did the beeping, being lost in the moment you didn't notice really but he knew.

He waved his hand signaling for you to stand up and brought his hand to take off his mask. He couldn't hold on much longer. Every aching pain inside him felt like knives stabbing his insides and with each stab more time from his life was taken.

"Kei, you need to keep it on to breath, please." He shakes his head and takes it off anyways. The beeping still started to slow. The mask hung off the side of his face. His honeyed voice now husk from the burns. 

"Baby...I love you so...so.." He coughs making him hiss at the pain.

"No..fuck..Kei stop, you're going to be okay just put the damn mask on." 

"I'm too..far..gone, I have no more fight left." 

Holding his jaw in your hands,your face inches from him. "No you have to stay strong for me, please don't leave me again, I can't do this without you." 

"Kid...please...when I'm gone...find someone else and-

"NO- I ONLY WANT YOU!" You cry out, holding his head to your chest. Long-lasting sobs leaving your mouth.

"I love...you" His breathing is heavy from trying to speak. He needed to tell you this. He needed you to understand how much he loves you.

Moving his head from your chest. "I love you too...kiego." You manage to say through your choked sobs. 

You move to have your lips brush his, softly, delicately, like butterfly wings, just long enough that he could inhale your breath, feel the warmth of your skin. He closes his eyes and connects his lips to yours. It was deep and passionate, like you were kissing him for the first time. You held one side of his face with one hand, and held his hand with the other. 

But when you pull away, his eyes don't open. It's like that's all he wanted, no needed. One last kiss, one last touch. To feel you. 

His breathing completely slows, and you're left with the prolonged beep of the monitor. He was gone. The man who was always too fast for his own good, had left you and the world too fast.

✶tag list: @levithestripper @sleepysnk @conniesspringersgf @regretfulfairies @miyanom @sashatotie @romeoandjuliet96 @strawberry-pp @megvmi-s @cinnamonnn-roll @gooddayzarerare @kkodzvken

[dramionediscussion]

When will people stop with the comparisons? The term "mudblood" was never the wizarding equivalent of the n-word, because it isn't preceded by centuries of imperialism, slavery, and institutional bias. Dramione is not the equivalent of a white supremacist and a black woman getting together, because bloody purity isn't based on white supremacy.

Similarly, Draco and other Death Eaters are not Nazis or Nazis in training. Around six million Jews were killed in the Holocaust, and those were just reported deaths. A higher number were tortured in concentration camps and gassed, and were never reported. Thousands of women were r*ped by officers.

Voldemort required muggleborns to be registered. Let's keep in mind that when this law was passed, the Ministry was controlled by him and he had complete authority. All he did was pass a law that required them to be registered. Maybe that was a stepping stone in what could have ultimately lead to the wizarding World War 2, but that isn't canon. Nothing in canon has ever hinted at the parallel to Nazi Germany. Don't draw lines equalling Voldemort to Hitler, because it simply doesn't hold.

Blood purity isn't based on anti-semitism or Nazi Germany. Calling Draco a "Nazi" is blatantly disrespectful to surviving Jews. Voldemort was nowhere near the level of inhumanity Hitler was on.

Sorry for the rant! I've come across at least three posts today calling Draco a Nazi or a white supremacist and it makes me feel nauseous that people actually feel justified in calling a fictional character by a term that is a trigger to so many people out there today, when the character isn't the term, at all.

People just want to feel "woke" or smart when they draw these (completely wrong and disrespectful) conclusions.

I've seen two this morning as well!

JKR admitted to taking inspiration from Hitler for Voldemort, but never said that the whole campaign Voldy used was based on the Nazis.

The word mudblood and the hate against the muggleborns and blood traitors has to do with class not race! We equate it as race since the major thing people now discriminate against is race, class is still something looked down upon for but in most countries in the world it's not important anymore. But race still is for some reason. So I can see why people will draw parallels, but they need to remember it's not the same exactly. And it's not right to call out characters as Nazis and then harass and be vile to someone who likes those characters.

I think that is the big issue here. People don't understand that this world is not real, these characters don't exist. So you cannot judge someone for liking the character just because you don't like them. Just because you don't like how the original author wrote them. You cannot be mean and say horrible things about people for liking a fake character.

And the people who do this are hypocrites, wanting to hate on Draco for calling Hermione a bad name all the while telling us fans of Draco that we are mentally ill and need help.

- Lisa

This is going to get me tore up from the floor up, but I’m just gonna go ahead and disagree to a certain extent.

For one, I wish I had better canon context. It’s been a long time since I read the books. But there is some indication that blood purity is based in the wizarding system of society. For one, a lot of purebloods are rich. Economically, they have somehow profited by being in the elite. We see that translated in white society on a racial plane, and we saw it happen with Germans during the Holocaust. The Weasleys, in particular, are cast out of both society and the economic status that comes with it by being “blood traitors” and turning on what pureblood society has come to stand for.

Further, in the last book, and to a certain extent in the new Fantastic Beasts movies, we see that there was major prejudice incorporated in government and society. For one, Anon, you bring up the fact that Muggles had to register when Voldemort was in charge of the Ministry. That definitely still counts as an example of how society just blatantly went along with a prejudicial law. Like, that happens so regularly unfortunately, even today, with people making laws that might seem innocuous on the surface but actually hurt large portions of society based on their skin color or gender, etc.--we’ve seen it with voting laws and abortion laws this year (2021) alone. In Fantastic Beasts, we see that in the 1930s there was major prejudice against wizards similar to the rise of the KKK and anti-race/Semitic sentiments reflected from Germany during the same time. There’s no way that would not have created a huge backlash of secrecy and fear and hate from the American wizarding community.

All of this being said, I will agree that the word “Nazi” is thrown around poorly these days by people who don’t understand the concept, and doing that does devalue the experiences of Jewish people from the Holocaust. 100% true. But to assume that the blood purity allegory is NOT an allegory for real life experiences of bigotry is both ignorant and harmful. For me to understand how the word “mudblood” would have affected Hermione (at age 13), I had to change the word to “bitch” in my head so that I could feel something similar to what she would have felt. I understood at 13 that I had the privilege of not being able to fully grasp what the sentiment meant to her. Just like I now know I have white privilege, and American privilege, and middle-class privilege. I think that this allegory serves as a good primer to children (whom the literature is meant for) who need to learn that some people are just discriminated against because the  society they’re in tells people that’s okay to do. So to that end, I disagree with your original statement.

-Shirlyn

[lilolilyr]

Andromaquynh headcanons:

- Quynh first thought she dreamt of a goddess- what else would the magical, beautiful being in her dreams be? She thinks the woman is the reason for her immortality, doesn't realise that she is a real person. It takes Andromache tracking her down and them finding a common language for her to understand the truth: that the other woman isn't more or less human than herself.

- In turn, Andromache understood what was going on since she first saw Quynh die and come back in a dream, she was only a little afraid of having gone insane but mostly convinced that the other woman was a real person because she was sure she couldn't come up with such beauty, plus she had never seen landscapes like the ones in her dreams before

- Quynh called Andromache 'An' as a petname and after a while Yusuf and Nicolo used it as a nickname too, but after Quynh is taken, Andromache doesn't allow them to call her that anymore as it's too painful to hear, shortening her name to Andrea/Anthea and later Andy instead

- Quynh doesn't dream while she is caught under the sea, she only lives for seconds before she drowns again after all, no time for sleep. The entire time she drowns and drowns again blurrs together to one memory of pain- I think after a while, it wouldn't make any difference anymore how long it goes on, I mean sure a mortal brain would get fried by too much torture but whenever there's actual nerve damage or something, her immortality would fix it.

- That being said, she does dream about Booker and Nile once she makes it out- my hc is that after the first dream, they dream about each other whenever both parties died the day before, and while she's making her way to the shore she's still often dying of thirst, starvation or drowning again, so she's then dreaming of them whenever they die in a mission

- Quynh finds Booker to get to Andromache- first because she wants to take revenge, in her dreams of Nile she has seen that An definitely isn't looking for her, but once she has had time to cool down and think for a bit she realises that there's no way they could've found her and she just hoped Andromache didn't forget about her entirely, hopes that she will take her back

- Andy lost her immortality because she lost her will to live- not necessarily wanting to die the way Booker does (who in my headcanon still wants to live, he just wishes for a different life and therefore for his current life to end), but just not wanting to continue to live anymore because she doesn't see anything good left in the world. Basically she's clinically depressed. When she finds out about the results of all her good deeds, she finds her will to live again, and her immortality returns! Working with Nile and the guys, distance to Booker's moping and finally Quynh's return help, too.

- immortal!Andromache for the win either way, those two deserve Time not tragic death! There are Way too few fanfic in the tag 'Andromache regains immortality' on ao3 :(

(Warning: skip the rest if you don't want to read NSFW)

- Quynh and An are switches. You aren't together for millenia without that happening. In general though, Andy likes it when Quynh dominates her, it's practically the only time she lets her guard down entirely.

- The immortals have No Shame TM. Especially amongst each other. They lived through times where sex wasn't seen as something shameful at all, plus with each other after walking in on the other couple having sex for the hundreds time it just looses all shock value. Quynh and Andy aren't as bad with PDA as Joe/Nicky who will literally fuck in the living room, but Nile still got an eyeful of them more than once and won't barge into the bathroom even if it's unlocked anymore...

Part 2

Feel free to add more!

[angelfire115]

The one who fell part 2

They walked into the hotel, Alice looked around, the decorations were incredible, it was the most amazing hotel she had ever seen. She hasn't been to many of course but still, it's the best one. She stared at the portrats on the wall, all kinds of paintings, most having Charlie in them. She spotted one that had her dressed formally, a beautiful tall woman that she guessed was her mother since the hair was the same. The other must be her father as they had the same pink cheeks. He did, however, give her a bad gut feeling as his smile looked eerily similar to the tall red man in that alleyway.

Charlie: "Huh, I wonder where Alastor is". Alice looked to Charlie, who looked around looking for this Alastor. Angel dust: "Oh yeah, I remember him saying he had to go deal with some "unpleasant" people". Charlie looked at Angel with surprise, then a dissapointed and angry scowl came across her face, guess whatever hes doing wasn't good. Alice: "Um, sorry to interrupt but, who is Alastor?". Charlie and Vaggie looked to Alastor. Charlie: "Oh well, Alastor is my business partner, he's helping me on making this hotel a success". Vaggie rolled her eyes and silently scoffed at that.

Alice looked to her new friends in a bit of confusion, he doesn't seem that bad if he's helping demons be redeemed. Charlie: "Hehe, well, he has his doubt's but still, I'm still glad he's here, we need as much support as possible". She looked to Vaggie as she said that which Vaggie looked away from her. As she walked towards the couch that was behind Alice, she stopped right next to her, leaning to her ear. Vaggie: "Word of advice, its best to stay away from that guy". Alice: "Why? Is he bad?". Vaggie: "He's worse then any demons you've met, he's named the radio demon, he kills and tortures whoever even touches him and one of the top demons that reside in hell, there are others which you should avoid but right now, Alastor is the number 1 demon to avoid". She faced her with a fury of justice burning in her eyes. Vaggie: "Don't, trust, anyone".

Alice understood what she was saying, she had to not forget that this place, was hell. She may have never had to feel this way or not as much but she had to train herself. Just like how she was trainned to face the real world by her parents, she had to make sure she lived through this. Vaggie had sat down after she had a talk while Charlie turned to Alice, excitement shining in her eyes.

Charlie: "Alright, Alice, should we get started with the proper signatures and such". Alice was a bit blanked out from her thoughts but snapped back into reality when she heard her name. Alice: "Oh, yeah, sure". She followed Charlie to the front desk. She signed some forms and some other hotel things then was given a key and was showed to her room. It was exciting and she absolutely loved her room. The place was so well made, however, she hadn't seen another guest yet. Maybe they were asleep?

Charlie left her to her room to get settled, she flopped onto the bed, staring at the sealing. Alice: "What a day? I wonder... Will anyone realize... If I'm gone?". She drifted to sleep, it had been a long and grueling day. At every turn while being here was one shock after the next. She was drained so she deserved some sleep, even if she was dirty and covered in blood, she didn't care. As her eyes closed and everything went dark, as she drifted into a sea of sleep.

Alice short up for a start, her head was spinning and her body feeling a bit numb. She rubbed her head, a little bit of a headache grew as time went. She looked around, she was in her room, sitting at her desk. The sun shined through the blinds, the air felt thin and warm. It was so familiar, she could hear the song birds singing their tunes. She got up slowly, a bit clumsy as she walked.

So, why in such a hurry toots?

The headaches got worse, making her fall to the ground, she seemed so tired, even though she just woke up. She grunted and grumbled, she really needed to get some painkillers. She remembered they were in her cupboard. She tried to get up but she fell again. She was shaking badly, tears ran down her face but she didnt notice.

Its ok, whatever happened is over now, you'll be ok

But she didn't want to give up, she was determined to stand. Her tears stopped and faded away. The headache was still there but it didn't hurt as much. Still though, she needed those painkillers. She walked to her door, it opened on its own but she didn't notice. She continued to walk down the halls, she turned to her left as she heard dripping, a dark eery room oozed a dark aura. Was there a tap still running? She thought to herself to go and turn it off

Don't, trust, anyone

She decided to not and just do it later, she continued to her kitchen. Finding the painkillers in her cupboard where she thought it was, grabbing it, she also grabbed a cup of water from the fridge. The dark ooze rounded the corner, sneaking its way towards her slowly and surely. She stared at the cup for a few seconds, ignoring the eyes that popped up in the reflection that wasn't hers. A burst of wind blew the doors open which she casually stared at. Before she was able to place the painkillers in her mouth....

How did you end up here?

She froze, an ice cold chill went up her spine as the ooze of darkness loomed over her. Bright red eyes shot open. She slowly turned, her shaking growing worse, as she shook, the house seemed to shake with her. She dropped the cup and painkillers that smashed and splashed into glass and thick red blood. She started to cry, the tears never stopped not that she tried to stop them. When she finally turned and looked to the shadow behind her. Large yellow teeth splayed across the darkness, the red eyes with no pupils seemed to stare into her soul. Disintegrating it with its terrifying look. Sharp claws reached out to her grabbing her head, she screamed but it faded away.

She shot up from the bed, she panted and cried. She looked around at her red room, the hotel room she was allowed to stay in for free. She backed up to the beds board behind her. Holding her knees up against her chest and letting her head lay in them as she cried from that nightmare. It was then she knew she couldn't stay in hell, she couldnt stay and help herself. She needed a guide, she needed freinds. She was too weak for this world. She wished she could go back immediately but, she knew she couldn't which made her lonely crying even worse.

After a few minutes of crying, she decided to stop, knowing that crying wouldn't get her anywhere. She looked around her room, then spotted a clock on the side of her bed. The clock showed 8:00 in the morning. Alice: "Wow, i didn't realize it was day". She shifted to the window where she opened the blinds. To her surprise, the sky was still dark but at least more brighter then yesterday but not as much. Of course, in a world of hell, it would still be dark even in the day. Alice: "Jesus, how can they tell time here?".

She remembered her shenanigans throughout hell and remebered her new friends. So after cleaning herself up, heading out the door and down the stairs. She made her way to the main lobby. Hopefully talking to people would get her mind off the nightmare and off the sorrowful feeling of not being able to go home. As she made it down stairs she noticed how busy some people were while others were new.

She saw Vaggie and Charlie, sitting on the couches with a large paper filled with writing, like it was some kind of small business meeting. She spotted the two new people, one looking like a large black and white cat with a small top hat and incredible red wings that folded perfectly on his back. He looked grumpy and he took big swigs of his drink he had. He looked a lot like her Uncle Jones who she'd spot at family reunions, all alone in the corner avoiding everyone. Made sense, her Aunt Grace didn't exactly enjoy his company. The other person though, disappeared.

??: "Who are you?". Alice was startled by a small and unfamiliar voice at her feet. She looked down to see the child looking creature staring up at her with one eye and a razor sharp smile. Alice: "Oh! You scared me, um I'm Alice, I'm a new guest, what's your name?". She crouched down a little, placing her hands on her knees. The young demon came closer to her and sniffed around her bubble which confused her greatly. ??: "Hmm, you don't smell like a demon". This shocked her a little.

She knows she's not a demon, she landed in this world without dying or anything else so she isn't. She came to the realisation that she had told no one since she got here about her being a human from the living world who's still alive. She wondered if she could, since, she didn't know what they could do to her if she found out. Alice: "W-well, uh, I'm gonna go over here". She was able to dodge the conversation by heading towards Vaggie and Charlie who wear still deep in thought.

Alice: "Um, morning guys". Vaggie and Charlie lifted their heads to see Alice and both smiled. Charlie: "Morning Alice, how was your sleep? Hope it went well". Alice: "Yeah it was great". Alice didn't want to bother them two with her nightmare she just had so she didn't say anything on it. She looked to the large paper they had, when she looked closer, it looked like a decorative drawing. It had rainbows and stars and happy things all over it, it even said the Happy Hotel. Alice smiled at how cute it was though the drawings looked like a five year old made them.

Alice: "So what are you guys doing?". Charlie looked back at her friend and new guest with a bigger smile growing on her face. Charlie: "We're making the new poster for the happy hotel". She picked up the poster, showing off all the drawings and more all over it. Alice: "Oh I see, it looks really good". Charlie sneered a little, she looked to her drawing in every angle. Charlie: "I know but I feel like it looks the same as the last one, I wish i could do something more different". Alice stood there for a second, thinking about any possibilities in her mind. One idea popped in her head and she grabbed a paper, a pencil and started her drawing.

Charlie and Vaggie was surprised by her intrusive act but was more interested to see her work. It took Alice a few minutes but she was done. Alice: "It's just a quick sketch so it isn't perfect but maybe this will give you an idea". She lifted her drawing which was neat and beautiful. It had a giant rainbow going into clouds on both sides just behind the letters that said "Hazbin Hotel" in bold and neat letters. It showed at the bottom a amazing drawing of heaven and at the top showed a detailed drawing of Charlie with her arms out and her smile huge.

Both Vaggie and Charlie stared in amazement at the incredible well made drawing. Vaggie: "Wow, that's pretty amazing". Alice slightly blushed at the compliment. Alice: "Oh its nothing, I've just done these things before, I've taken a lot of art classes". Charlie excitedly grabbed the poster and looked at every inch of it. Charlie: "This is AMAZING, I love it". She was so happy and her demeanour was bright but it quickly faded as she noticed something. Charlie: "Although, why does it say Hazbin Hotel? This is the Happy Hotel". She pointed to the letters on the page.

Alice: "Oh sorry, I thought that's what the Hotel was called since the sign says it at the top". Charlie looked more confused, the sign? Charlie: "But that should say the Happy Hotel as we-". She stopped at the middle of her speaking to realize in an angry scowl which ended in a disappointed sigh. Charlie: "He must of changed it". She sort of mumbled that to herself but Alice and Vaggie could still hear it. Did she mean Alastor? The one Vaggie warned Alice about? It might be.

Charlie got up from her seat to head to the door. Alice: "Are you ok Charlie?". Charlie kept heading to the door. Charlie: "Yeah, I'm fine, I just want to see it for myself". Alice stood in a bit of disaray, she was nervous but she had to be brave. Alice: "Uh, Charlie wait". She called out to Charlie which made her stop just at the door, she looked back to Alice who slowly approached her. Charlie: "Yeah? Is there something you need?". Alice stiffened, she was told by Vaggie yesterday not to trust anyone and she's followed it through but Charlie was nice and kind, she didn't seem like a demon at all. She knew or thought she could trust her with her secret as a living mortal in hell.

Just as Alice was about to speak, the doors at the front of the hotel burst open. A strong wind sent everyones hairs go crazy from it. A strong light gleamed through but Charlie turned to it. She folded her arms and glared at the person there. Charlie: "There you are, I've been worried". Alice couldn't see who was at the door since the light was too bright and Charlie was in the way. ??: "Sorry to worry you my dear, I was a bit busy today". The second Alice heard that voice her heart stopped, it was the same voice as before. The same voice she heard cackling in that alleyway. That same voice who's mouth drooled with blood and chomped on the flesh of people. She started to shake and her breathing was heavy, she wanted to run but she couldn't move.

Charlie: "Did your busy time involve hunting people?". The person laughed in an ungodly and terrifying way that sent shivers down Alices' spine. ??: "Maybe, but no, I was looking for someone". Charlie gave up on her questioning and moved aside to let him in. The person who entered was tall and red, it was definitely the same person who was in that alley, who killed that old beetle demon in cold blood and all the others

She looked up at this fiend while he stared down at her. His smile sharpened as he saw her, he definitely recognized her. Charlie: "Alice, this Alastor, Alastor this is Alice, she's our new and first guest". Charlie had walked in to introduce the two. Alastor looked to Charlie in more curiosity. Alastor: "Is she now".

He looked back at her, his smile still wide in amusement. Alice still couldn't move, she stared at him in incredible amounts of fear, her shaking never stopped. Alastor: "Well it is very nice to meet you Alice, my, what a lovely name, I am the radio demon Alastor, very happy to make your acquaintance". Alastor held out his hand for a hand shake which Alice stared at for a while. She still couldn't move, if she could, she would be out of there. Charlie looked at her with concern and worry, stepping to her side, she held her shoulder. Charlie: "Alice, are you ok?". Within seconds everything went black for Alice, she could hear her name being called a few times, muffled but it faded away. She didn't know what happened, all she saw was darkness, was she dead? Asleep? She still couldn't move but, she didn't want too, so she laid in darkness, waiting for the end.

[skzarchivewritings]

All I Ask – ｊｉｓｕｎｇ

Summary: You're a staff in JYP and had fall in love with the rookie Han from Stray Kids, unfortunately you can't keep hiding this relationship forever.

Pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

Genre: angst.

Warnings: breakup and slight mention of smut (not explicit).

A/N: English isn't even my second language, so I apologize since the beginning for any mistake. You can always talk to me in twitter @3RACHAGIRL to warn me about anything. This is loosely based in All I Ask by Adele.

Word count: 1804

You always knew this couldn't last forever. Even though you were selfish enough to keep this going, deep down you always knew. It was risky since the beginning, and now things have crashed down.

It was always a matter of time until people caught both of you with your guards down, but you got used to his presence. He promised you that he would reveal you to the world when his dating ban finally reached the end. Unfortunately, people got you guys before that, and after a meeting with lots of swearing, you've been fired from your job of choreographer and he was punished with less spotlight in Stray Kids next comeback.

What has hurt you most was the decision that he had to face: you or his career. Of course he wouldn't give up from his dream, and do you wouldn't let him do it. The manager spoke harshly about how you two had to breakup what shouldn't even be started, you felt the weight of this mess crash you, and the heartbreak never felt so real.

The urge to go running away and hide to cry was so intense, you were ready to leave, but Jisung hands gripped your arms, holding you close. You heard him sniffling in your hair, probably facing the same difficulty as you to hold back his tears.

"Just three years... Can you wait for me?" his voice was trembling.

You just nodded, hugging him close enough to bury your face in his chest, letting the tears fall down. He asked for a last night, you wondered if this would do good, but you needed to hold him for one last time.

Jisung went to your apartment that night, you were waiting for him patiently. Every and then you were dressing up for him, you thought that was the last time you would do it for him in a while, just to think about it alone would bring tears in your eyes. When he passed the door, you tried to get a hold of yourself, smiling for him.

"You looks so beautiful today, love" you said to him, smiling brightly.

"You look as beautiful as ever, Y/N." he smiled, taking a few steps to get closer, caressing your cheek "I am already missing you" his voice fell.

The atmosphere were tense for the next fifteen minutes, but then Jisung carried you to the couch, to watch a movie together. It was Me Before You, you guys liked the bittersweet of that movie, even if it wasn't exactly the most favorite type of yours.

He leaned his head in your shoulders, hugging you tight, sometimes joking about some scene. You were distracted by him, looking at his face, memorizing every single detail of him, from his eyebrows shape to his chin. Your heart was beating in a way that was hurting you, you were feeling feeling nauseous of how intense just his bare face was hurting you because he was leaving. Jisung noticed that, sitting up straight and leaning to kiss your forehead.

"I'm still here..." he kissed you again, closing his eyes "Don't cry in front of me, I can't handle seeing you cry." he begged, with his point fingertip in your lips, that he switched to his mouth, locking with yours.

He was passionate in his touches, placing his hands firm enough to make you sure he was there. He kissed you gently, slowly, making you feel the desire he was feeling too. Jisung carried you to your bedroom, placing you on your bed.

That night he worshipped your body like he never did, he leaved marks on you, and not the hickeys ones, the mark of feeling loved. He took you slow, with lots of locking eyes together, he made you sure you knew how much he loved you, until you two had the energy drained, and then collapsed into each other arms, falling asleep.

But when you woke up, he wasn't there anymore.

You felt the pain hit you hard. He didn't even said goodbye, you couldn't tell him one last time that you loved him. You sit in bed, putting your face in your hands with frustration. There was a post it glued to your mattress, it took you lot of courage to read that.

I couldn't face you in the morning, I'm sorry. There's coffee waiting for you. See you in three years. J.One

You cried desperately, maybe he could hear you. You heart clenched in pain, it was starting to making everything too real. It was hard to get up that day, but you convinced yourself to go at least eat the breakfast he prepared for you.

The other days were harder. Sometimes you would cry in the middle of nowhere, like cleaning up your bathroom. You tried hard to get yourself together, but you just couldn't do it.

What gives you hope was read that note every night before go to bed. It was a temporary pain, everything will pass, you thought.

The days were getting a little bit easier through the time, you were getting used to the pain. You needed to get a hold of yourself, and then you searched for another company to work for. Luckily JYP haven't blacklisted you, so it made easier to find a new job.

You spent the last three years helping to prepare a new girlgroup to debut, they were really hard working and united, that enough made your heart fall for them. When their debut date was set, you were so full of work you didn't even realized that has passed the dating ban from Stray Kids, you haven't called him, and neither did him.

Your boss told the dance staff to always be with them, so even in music shows recording for their debut stage you were there too. The girls always thanked you for helping them with female stuff, because most of the staff was men, so you understood them better, always getting their back. One day you were in Inkigayo backstage, and you passed by a loud screeching noise you totally got forgotten in the past months about it, you heart almost jumped out of your chest. You speed up your pace, running out from that sound that made you shocked.

“Noona, are you okay?” the maknae from the group asked you, and you just smiled to her. “I'm fine, I just think I saw a ghost in the corridor” you faked a laugh, getting a water bottle and drinking. The girl was so confused, and lowkey scared that you might be telling the truth.

The older one just entered the room, retouching her lipstick in front of the mirror, analyzing her features in the mirror. She looked at you so enthusiastically that you felt taken aback when she spoke with you.

“Noona, I need coverage” she looked at her feet, blushing red “I just found this sunbaenim… He is really cute, tho… Can you watch us to warn if someone suddenly appears?” she was fully red in her face, and you looked hella confused.

“I mean… Taehee… isn't it too risky to do it?” you were concerned, getting closer to her, getting a grip onto her shoulders “You just debuted, don't risk everything because of a fling” you weren't being harsh, you just knew that same path, although you never told anyone about why you have been fired from your previous job, you felt the need to explain to that girl that she has to take some manners in industry.

Suddenly you felt the weight of your own past relationship to add to your shoulder, you had to excuse yourself out of the changing room to have some fresh air, you were ready to burst into tears. For three years you didn't dated anyone, you haven't been in a blind date or something, you just waited for him. You forgot this because of how busy and stressed you were in this whole trainee process, and just by hearing him from a long distance snapped you out of your own trance. How could Han Jisung affect you that much even after all this time? That was unfair.

Walking by the corridors you spotted Stray Kids manager, you bowed to him and got ready to walk away, but he stopped you.

“Y/N! It's been so long…” yeah, like you weren't the one who denounced your secret dates with his member, you thought.

“Hey” you forced yourself to smile “Yeah, now I'm training a girlgroup, amazing, isn't it?”

He congratulated you, and looked sincere, you both small talk for a little bit, when you are ready to turn around and go away, you saw those flashes of pity in his eyes. You wished you could curse him, break him apart.

Walking around you found yourself a nice and quiet place to simply stay there with your thoughts, you found a sit in the ground, closing your eyes and torturing yourself with memories that should be long forgotten. It was so hard to keep standing still, it's almost like you've been woken up from a coma just to hear his voice. It hurted you so bad. Your heart felt terrible in pain because your mind reminded you how brightly Jisung used to smile to you, or his scared faces whenever a loud noise suddenly appeared. You chuckled to that memory of your phone ringing making him surprised when you were so close to him and everything was so silent.

He was the sweetest, but now he's untouchable for you. Stray Kids has gone way too far for you to ask him about his promise, you weren't that selfish. Also he probably has already got over you. Han never called you in these three years, and something in the back of your mind told you it was because he probably didn't wanted you back. It was foolish from you to keep waiting for something that would never happen, you could only cherish the good memories that he left with you.

You recomposed yourself and went back to the corridors searching for your staff crew members, you would probably have to apologize for gone missing for a couple of minutes. Walking fast, you suddenly stopped when the Stray Kids changing room door opened, revealing Jisung itself. He smiled at you, you smiled back, but hurried before he could start a conversation with you, for the sake of your own emotional state. You would always remind of him like a good and smiling guy, it was better for you just end things in a good mood.

It always mattered for you how it would ends, and with a smile face was the better possibility you could take from that. It was time to let him go.

Goodbye, brown eyes. Goodbye, my love.

[fortheloveofparkjimin1013]

Regarding Kaname's characterisation, I remember how some yumes are seeing child Kaname as a poor and tortured kid (it mentioned how he's only allowed to live for someone else or something like that). I feel like those yumes are stuck with Kaname's child image, and only stop at first arc Kaname. While I do think child Kaname isn't that bad, it doesn't change the fact that he commit crimes when he's an adult :/.

Hi anon. I completely understand what you are saying. I think child Kaname who was raised with love by Juuri and Haruka was a kind and loving child. I believe from the moment Yuuki was born was the beginning of his spiral into the darkness. He allowed his repressed feelings of despair, loneliness, and abandonment from the hooded woman sacrificing herself to muddy up and ruin the kind person he could have been. 

I am one who believes, that had Yuuki not been born, that terrible seed of desire would not have been awakened within Kaname and he most likely would have continued to grow into a kind and caring adult. Of course he would have had his issues with the senate and the way they handled things but he would not have had his misplaced need to protect Yuuki no matter how vile of a person he became while trying to do so. He really allowed his despair to guide his way of thinking and dictate how he lived his life.

To be quite honest I wish the hooded woman’s affect on Kaname had been explored more by Hino. Her life with him which gave him warmth and hope and purpose and then her sacrifice in place of him is truly what drove him down the dark path with Yuuki. Hino dropped the ball on this. And quite honestly in my opinion it would have given us a much better understanding of Kaname and his subsequent actions after losing the hooded woman that way. I would have been able to empathize more with his crazy imprinting on Yuuki and his outlandish need to keep her and her warmth protected at all costs. 

Hino needed to give us a more in depth history of Kaname and the hooded woman since it is abundantly clear that she is the reason for his fear of losing another person who provided him with warmth and purpose again. And yet we can’t say that Yuuki and the hooded woman are the only ones in his life who provided him with warmth because Haruka and Juuri loved and cared for him like he was their own. So Hino needed to clarify just what it was about losing the hooded woman and her warmth that caused the fear specifically of losing Yuuki’s warmth.

Of course the person Kaname grew up to be always gets overlooked by his fans and that is quite sad. I just can’t find a way to justify killing people and being a party to murdering a child’s family and having him turned into a weapon for your use and then disposal. Simply because you are bat shit crazy and feel the need to protect another being who CANNOT die by simply being injured or attacked or even having her head cut off. There are no excuses that anyone can give me to explain or justify his loathsome actions. It is great to love a character. But part of loving a villain or anti-hero is being able to admit their wrong doing and knowing that they need to suffer consequences for their actions. His fans seem to have a hard time doing this. They want to believe that what he did was justifiable. When clearly it is NOT!

An example of a character whom I loved and can be considered an anti-hero by some and possibly a villain by others is Lelouch Vi Britannia from Code Geass. He will stop at nothing to protect his sister. But he doesn’t just want to protect her. He wants to make a better world for her. He will stop at nothing to accomplish this. Even if it means being “evil”. He is a chess master and is willing to use anyone, even the very sister he is doing all this for. I think he was a character that I knew would have to suffer consequences for his actions, especially as he slipped further and further into the abyss of darkness. When all was said and done I understood what drove him from top to bottom. I loved this character and still knew that the things he did were wrong. He would need to pay for his evil actions even if his overall intentions were good. This is what I want from an anti-hero/villain. Lelouch was a well thought out and fleshed out anti-hero/villain.

At the end of the day Kaname is simply left an enigma to us and that is quite the tragedy of his character.

Thank you for dropping by :)