#annoying dude(tm)

[ace-ogato]

ShadowMilk getting a costume BEFORE Burning Spice and Mystic Flour makes me wanna rip my hair out but whatever it's fine. It's fine guys I guess I'm not mad about it at all actually

[rawliverandgoronspice]

I don't get why people hate the timeline so much, its not like you can't pretty much completely ignore it when you play the games. The only time it even approaches mattering to the story is when there is an explicit sequel like botw and totk or zelda and zelda 2

Hey sorry your ask got lost in the sauce of my broken tumblr, but: yeah!

I mean, I get why in some sense. It's been a heated point of debate and I think some people understandably resent the space it has taken not only in fandom discourse, but in how people began to understand the game and its narrative aesthetic choices. There is such a thing as over-rationalizing everything to hard logic, and sometimes it's just not the fandom for that --especially when you begin to forget it's all just fan theory and start to forget what the games are supposed to be like and evoke beyond just strict facts displayed in a linear way.

What I think bugs me with TotK in particular is that it both evokes and relies on continuity and the idea of a timeline, of archeology, of history itself, while being so loose and vacant with it that it both is doing Timeline Shit while also completely failing to understand why some parts of the fandom were invested in Timeline Shit to begin with.

But that's just my two cents of course!

[reinabeestudio]

you stop shaving as a woman and people just dont know what to call you anymore huh

[auras3ye]

ya’ll some bird dive bombed all over my denim jacket 😭 it was fine when i left home and when i got to shoppers after getting out of my uber i noticed it at the checkout.

[ovisiphorus]

People are annoying and suffer from not knowing how to write properly and from not knowing how cartoons are made so go “well I would have changed THESE parts of what’s already a cohesive narrative I don’t get the point of and THEN it would have been good!” about both SU and other media. This sort of snotty and annoying refusal to engage with a text then became the defining way to interact with media going forward.

Also the backlash started right around the time where the right wing and such sentiment was taking over in droves globally and online. The cultivation of “irony” and “cringe” def had an outsized influence on queer people and many internalized it so refused to extend grace to a queer-positive, progressive, queer-created show with a narrative about restorative justice and instead devolved into the crowd of dipshit chuds also hating on the show for being [slurs].

It’s aggravating, what’s happened. And from my POV as a Black queer person who understands narrative and what Sugar and company were saying and also knows how cartoons are made, the way people went and go extra ham talking about real life issues wrt this show, allegedly to HELP me/people like me, I think it sucks and I refuse to give people who behave this way the time of day or my attention.

speaking as a fan of both, why do steven universe fans talk about it like it’s miraculous ladybug. steven universe was actually good

[sp0o0kylights]

Part one here:: link

"oh i dunno if Im going to finish this" I say, right before the plot ate me. anyway this was too big to post in full to tumblr. If you want the full, completed fic (with bonus Fun Fic Facts tm) it is finished and up on A03 here:: link

TW vomiting, drug use

Eddie is good.

Eddie is kind.

Eddie does not run over Henderson’s bike, laying haphazardly in Harrington’s pristine driveway, even if it would make him feel better. 

He does slam his van into park with enough force to make the brakes squeal, which he decides is an excellent way to announce his appearance to the entire neighborhood. 

It’s a move he’s pulled countless times. Charging in and making a scene meant people forgot that he couldn’t actually fight for shit, and equally, took their attention off whatever their original target was.

Which in this case, was Eddie’s too fucking nice freshman. 

The rage pulsing through him is white hot and all encompassing, and it’ll get him through a lot--but the switchblade he carries ensures everyone’s safety in these little matters. 

It makes him brave.

Braver than he should be really, but Eddie spent the entire drive over here chain smoking out the window while prepping for this little confrontation and the more he’d thought it all over, the madder he got.

That a washed up jock thought he could still take advantage of actual children. 

Nevermind Hellfire, or Henderson ditching, or Sinclaire’s ranting. 

This was about their relationship with Harrington. 

A picture has been building in Eddie’s head. One that’s only gotten clearer after today, and one he will be putting an end to, because he doesn’t believe for a second Harrington has a headache. 

Henderson might always be the smartest person in the room, but he’s dumb as hell socially. Too honest, too blunt, and frankly, too goodhearted. 

That makes him easy to take advantage of. 

Sinclair was worse--the guy was too easy to guilt trip. 

It was a noted issue with his ranger, and apparently, himself, and Eddie could easily see how Harrington could have twisted the idea of some ridiculous life-debt to keep Lucas in his clutches.  

Even Mayfield, Billy Hargrove’s former stepsister, was wrapped up in Harrington enough to have a go at her own friends over him! 

She wasn’t even one of his flock, but Eddie was her neighbor. Saw how her mom was barely home. How she was practically raising herself, head down, doing her best not to ever let people see her cry. 

Yeah.

Wouldn’t exactly be difficult for a guy like Steve Harrington to swoop in and take advantage there. 

Wheeler clearly wasn’t a fan and Eddie can only come up with reason after reason as to why--King Jackass had the poor kid’s entire friend group under some kind of--of sick spell.

Well. 

Eddie was here to break it. 

Even if it meant storming into the King’s castle by himself and calling him out on his shit. 

Nobody fucked with his people. Especially not douchebag, washed up jocks. 

He’s up to Harringotn’s ridiculous double doors in a flash, banging hard on the wood with a closed fist, positively fuming and uncaring of who sees. 

Surprise, surprise, it’s Henderson who opens it.

“Eddie?” He says, blinking up at him like he’s not sure of what he’s seeing.  “What are you--hey!” 

Hey, because Eddie’s pushed past him, storming into the house. 

“This has gone on long enough.” He announces, loud as he ever has been. “Where the hell’s Harrington?”

Henderson, frustratingly, does not weep or throw his hands up in celebration of Eddie’s incoming rescue. 

Which is fine--Eddie hasn’t broken the spell yet.

Unfortunately he is bitching, in that infamously annoying tone of his.

“Dude, shut up, Steve’s pills really only work for like, an hour--” 

“Fantastic, he’ll be clear headed for our little talk.” Eddie tells him, head sweeping left and  right as he looks for his target. He’s been in Casa de Harrington a few times before to deal, but it was always at night.

He can now say with perfect honesty that the place looks worse in the bright light of the day. 

“Was that Eddie?” Sinclair calls, and Eddie orients towards him instantly, storming down the hall. 

It doesn’t take long to find the kid. 

 Lucas is standing in a kitchen larger than Eddie’s entire trailer, a too-large pink apron drowning his frame. 

He turns, revealing the front of the thing has  ‘Whisk Taker’ written on it in syrupy white font. 

(Baking puns. Disgusting.) 

“Are you cooking?” Eddie accuses with a sneer, though his disgust isn’t aimed at the freshmen. 

This is exactly what he was afraid of finding. 

Lucas just stares at him. “Uh--yeah?” 

“What did I say about too many people, Munson?” Mayfrield spits angrily. It takes a second to locate her--the kitchen is enormous and far too white--but eventually Eddie realizes she’s perched up on a counter next to the largest sink he’s ever seen. 

For a second, Eddie thinks that’s just where she’s chosen to sit. Then she moves, and he realizes she’s washing and drying a series of water bottles. 

He never in his life thought he’d witness Maxine Mayfield willingly do someone else's dishes. 

“Someone get me Harrington.” He’s not trying for anything dramatic, but his voice must sound dangerous because all three freshmen stop dead, eyes wide as if he's just spoken in tongues.

He zeroes in on Dustin with a glare. “Now.”

Who huffs, throwing his hands up in the air like Eddie’s the one being unreasonable here. 

“Absolutely not--we just got Steve to sit down. He’s been following me around the house insisting I’m causing more problems than I’m fixing!”

“Because you are.” Steve says, voice dripping with calm condescension as he appears like a wraith in the doorway. “And I know you’re all into the whole dungeon game, Munson, but this is a little dramatic, even for you.”

Eddie whirls to face him, already vibrating with fury. “Oh, that’s rich, coming from the guy who’s treating them like his personal minions. What’s next, Harrington? Gonna make them re-shingle the roof? Paint your house? Wax your car?”

Steve gives him a flat, almost disbelieving stare. “Do you seriously think I had Henderson miss your game just so I could lounge around while he’s doing chores?”

Eddie doesn’t bite, too busy unloading. “Oh we can both see it’s more than that.”

He doesn’t notice the way Steve’s jaw tenses, or how his hand creeps up to the side of his head, rubbing at his temple. 

“Anything else you want done, Harrington? Maybe make ‘em mow the lawn?” Eddie sneers. “Or teach ‘em to plump your pillows just the way you like—”

Steve finally snaps, pushing himself upright. “You know what Munson, you're right,” he says, voice tight with barely-contained frustration. “I’m clearly a terrible person they need to be rescued from so--”  

He cuts himself off with a hiss,  eyes squeezing shut as his hand goes to the side of his head, and spits out his next words like they hurt. 

“You can play the good guy and take them all home.” 

Dustin, with an exasperated sigh, steps between them. “No,” he tells Steve sternly, as if managing an unruly child, before spinning on his heel to say the exact same thing, in the exact same tone--to Eddie. 

(Jackass freshman can’t even appreciate when they’re being actively rescued!) 

“Eddie, I promise that this isn’t what it looks like.” 

For anyone else it would sound like a plea, but Henderosn somehow makes it condescending.

“We can explain, alright?” Dustin says, raising his hands as though coaxing a skittish animal. “Will you let us explain? Please?”

Eddie glowers. 

“You clearly do not, in fact, know what this looks like. Because if you did,” 

Eddie can make himself menacing and he does so now, pulling on every single year of drama and theatrics and lying to cops he’s had, pushing his shoulders back and making his body tall.

“You would know that it looks like a guy who peaked in high school is forcing a bunch of fourteen year olds to do his bidding.” 

He takes an aggressive step towards Steve, boots thunking hard on the floor. “And that isn’t happening on my watch.” 

“Aren’t you like an extra super senior?” Mayfield says, arms crossed over her chest. 

“Irrelevant!” Eddie swats the air in her direction, as if to physically bat away her words. “I’m still in high school and I’m not emotionally blackmailing a bunch of kids into waiting on me hand and foot while I fake a headache!” 

“Oh ew.” Max’s nose scrunches in disgust, a mixture of disbelief and fury warring on her face. “That is not what’s happening here.” 

“Were you even listening earlier?!” Lucas says, like he can’t quite believe Eddie is this dumb. 

(His character will be the next to die, so Eddie swears.) 

“I did.” Eddie points a finger at him, triumphant. “I heard all about how he’s tricked you into thinking you owe him a life-debt!”

“A what?” Harrington’s squinting, like he’s struggling to follow along what is happening. It’s a halfway decent sick act, Eddie will give it to him, but he knows the facade will drop in a moment. 

As soon as the asshole loses his temper and decides to try and throw Eddie out, he’ll switch from the Poor Me act into the usual pompous, rich dick on a rampage persona. 

“How he’s saved you all, convinced you and Henderson that you’re in debt to him.” 

“Could we just---please stop yelling?” Steve says in the background, heel pressing hard against his eyes. 

Then winces like his own voice hurts his head.

“What the hell, Eddie?!” Dustin’s cut across the room, stepping in between the two older teens. “Where did this even come from!?” 

“Guys.” 

“The mouths of babes, Henderson. Which you would know if you witnessed Sinclair’s rant instead of missing out because King Dickhead demanded your presence at his castle!” 

“Guys.” Steve’s voice abruptly takes on a weird tone, and it’s only Mayfield’s eyes popping wide that has Eddie realizing something is wrong--right before Harrington shoots past him, noisily hurling in the sink.

“Gross!” Max shrieks, throwing herself off the counter. 

Harrington aims a shaky middle finger in her direction. 

“I just washed those bottles Steve, I'm not washing them again!” Mayfield rants, but she’s not fooling anyone. Not with the way she’s already edging back towards him, like she’s afraid he might fall over. 

(Worse, like she might try to catch him, as if Harrington’s broad, barbarian-like shoulders wouldn’t flatten her instantly.) 

“Al-’right.” Harrington slurs a moment later, still panting over the sink. “Everyone--out. Now.” 

“Steve--” 

“Nope. Making it worse. Out.” 

He manages to stand and turn, leaning hard against the counter and for the first time since this all started, Eddie looks at him. 

Properly, and not through the lens of righteous fury. 

Harrington’s pale.

The shirt he’s wearing is stained with sweat marks, his sweatpants clearly old and worn for comfort rather than style. 

His hair…

Eddie has never seen Harrington without his infamously perfect hairdo, and the messy, slick waves plastered to his forehead is more of a shock then him vomiting in the sink. 

He’s got his hands pressed hard against his eyes again, and there’s a slight tremble in his fingers that belay he’s likely in a lot more pain than he’s letting on.

In short, Harrington looks like absolute shit, and Eddie, maybe, possibly, the tiniest bit believes he actually has a migraine. 

Well, it was that or he was really committed to the bit… 

The tense silence that has befallen them all is ruined when Harrington makes a ‘hurk.’ noise.

“I’m going to throw up again.” He decides after a moment of contemplation, before whipping back around to the sink and doing just that. 

“Steve’s right.” Mayfield decides suddenly, over all the nasty noises. “We should leave.” 

“I’m almost done cooking!” Sinclair protests, as if Harrington isn’t presently throwing up the contents of his stomach. 

“You’re almost done burning things, you mean.” Max mutters, but her words can’t hide the blatant concern written all over his face. “I don’t think he’s going to keep anything down.” 

“He needs us to finish what we started.” Dustin argues passionately. “You know how bad he gets, he’s not gonna be able to get up in an hour!” 

(A clear exaggeration, because Harrington looks like he’s not gonna make it across the kitchen unassisted.) 

“What I need is for everyone to stop talking so fucking loud.” Harrington moans, before appearing to give up on life entirely. 

He sort of sags against the counter, resting his head against his arms while bent double, as if that would help things. 

It was at this point that Eddie had the most unfortunate realization that he might be the asshole here. 

Because Harrington looks rough--and if he actually does in fact, have a migraine, then Eddie has done nothing but make it worse.

(Very likely the freshmen have as well, given Dustin is incapable of talking in anything other than a loud yell, and the smell of Lucas’s burnt food has permeated the air.

Mayfield seemed to have accomplished a small amount of actual work, at least.

…If Harrington managed to miss throwing up on the water bottles.) 

“Look,” Harrington interrupts with an audible, thick swallow.“You guys did great, and I appreciate the uh, help. I’m fine, I promise, you can all go home. Munson,” 

He doesn’t turn, but his voice does change into something that’s half pleading, half demanding.

“Can we please fight about this tomorrow? Or next week?” 

“No fighting!” Dustin shrieks, which has the effect of making Harrington cringe into the counter--and that is what finally kicks Eddie over.

Bows to the instincts that now want to wrap up Harrington in a blanket over the ones that want to strangle him, (though both are very much at odds in his head with each other.)

“We can put a pin in it.” He says, all the venom dropping out of his voice,  already knowing what’s going to happen next and hating himself for it. 

Even at his absolute worst, Eddie has never been able to resist trying to fix a problem he’s been presented with--or turn down someone who needs help.

Harrington, clearly, needs help. 

“You heard him.” He tells his freshman, then immediately holds up a hand when all three try to protest at once. 

“Ah-ah, inside voices.” He himself uses a harsh whisper, and then has to fight not to laugh aloud when all three abruptly eye him like he’s lost his head.

He probably has.

(Fucking King Steve.

No one who is that much of a douchebag should ever look that pathetic without deserving it, it’s against the Munson doctrine.) 

“Henderson, have you done anything actually useful while you’ve been here? Like, say, getting a warm washcloth?” 

“I--oh.” Dustin’s on the defense instantly, but for once actually listens before he finishes his sentence. “Uh. No.”

“Go do that then.” Eddie instructs, making sure to keep his voice quiet and even. 

“Sinclair, toss out the eggs, then take the garbage out so it’ll stop stinking up the place. Mayfield, see if these windows open. Harrington…” 

He pauses, watching as Harrington tries to gather himself, moving slowly and deliberately like even breathing hurts. His entire appearance is grating Eddie’s nerves—not because he doesn’t care, but because he does, and that’s infuriating. 

“Go lay down, man.” He finishes lamely. 

He expects the freshmen to listen to him. Knows they will, in his heart of hearts, even if they bitch back, because that’s just how things are when he decides to take charge. So few people truly want to, that others are often relieved when he does. 

Steve Harrington is not most people.

If he argues, he could very well tip things out of control again, which means Eddie is likely going to have to force the trio of fourteen year olds out of the house. 

Henderson and Sinclair he can manage but Mayfield…

Thankfully, Steve pushes off the counter with a groan, muttering something under his breath, but slowly making his way toward the couch without any other protest. 

The freshmen exchange glances, all of them looking just as unsure as Eddie feels. Like they’re waiting for instructions now that their default leader is down for the count.

He clears his throat pointedly. 

“Hello? Did I not give you marching orders?” He bats his hands at them. “Go march!” 

Mayfield mutters something that sounds an awful lot like “hypocrite” but thankfully, does as asked. 

“Are you gonna give us a ride home?” Henderson asks as he finally starts moving around--hopefully to get a damn washcloth. 

“You got yourself here, you can get yourself home.” Eddie scoffs back, taking stock of Harrington’s kitchen. 

He eyes the line of pain pills laid out on the counter, quickly noting not one of them is anything that would help with a sneeze let alone a migraine. 

Typical. 

“Why not?” Dustin disappeared down a hallway, but the fact Eddie can still hear him plain as day speaks to his ability to keep quiet. “You have your van, don’t you?” 

“Because I’m not leaving when you three are leaving.” 

It’s an absentminded comment, given his mind is elsewhere. 

Weed may be his bread and butter but he does have a handful of more serious things on offer. 

Of those things, one or two have some fun little unexpected side effects, and if Eddie recalls Rick’s yapping right, one of said things was stopping headaches. 

Said magic little mushrooms might even be in a pocket or two, here, if he remembers right… 

“Wait, you're staying here?” Lucas protests, far too loudly. 

"Ssszzhh!" Eddie hisses, drawing out the sound dramatically, mostly for the sake of cutting off whatever protests were coming his way. 

“No arguing. Your beloved King clearly needs a nap, and that means you’re all off duty. Unless," he adds with a raised eyebrow, "you intend to watch him sleep?"

Dustin looks torn, but mutters a quiet, "No," his eyes shifting sideways like he's weighing the logic.

"Good. Then if you’re all finished…?”

He waits for the nods he knows are coming. 

“Excellent. Now leave." Eddie says, pointing towards the door. 

They hesitate for a second, but then finally begin to shuffle out, the door clicking quietly behind them. 

And just like that, Eddie’s left standing there, watching Steve breathe shallowly on the couch--with a washrag over his eyes.

(At least Dustin managed that.) 

He could leave now. 

Should leave, really. Giving out drugs for free is not exactly a good business move and Steve will no doubt sleep the headache off without it. But Eddie’s feet don't seem to agree with him, rooted in place as his gaze lingers on the sharp line of Steve's jaw, the slight twitch of his brow every time a muscle aches.

Feels the pull, deep in his gut, to provide the relief he knows he can give. 

Before he knows what’s happening, he’s moving, crossing the room toward him.

“Munson?” Harrington squints up at him as he registers his presence, washcloth nudged upwards by shaky fingers. “Why’r you still ‘ere?” 

“Because I’m stupid.” Eddie mutters, right before realizing he actually said that outloud. 

“What?” 

Thank God for Harrington’s headache. 

“You look terrible, man.”  Eddie says slightly louder. “That hair of yours is so flat I think your crown’s gonna fall right off.” 

He’d meant it as a joke--spoke it like one, but it seems to snap Harrington out of his pity party. 

The sigh that blasts out of him is a whole body affair, and gets his feelings across better than his words do. “I get it. You thought this was something else and it wasn’t. Not the first time that’s happened.” 

He turns, cheek scraping against the fabric of his shirt, red rimmed eyes squinting against the light to look at Eddie. 

“You got your laugh in, so you can go.” 

There’s defeat in his voice. Like he’s accepted this might as well have happened. 

(Like he’s just as beaten down as anyone Eddie has ever saved.) 

“I didn’t stick around to laugh.” Eddie keeps his voice soft, and that somehow, makes the next part easier to say.  

“I honestly thought you were messing around with Henderson and Sinclair, and I uh, I’m used to being the only person who gives a shit. When that kind of thing happens.” 

Harrington grimaces. 

“It’s okay.” he mutters, eyes sliding closed once more. “Most people still think I’m an asshole.”

His tone has gone odd again, wrecked and rasping, migraine clearly trumping whatever strong feelings he had on the matter. 

And the stupid thing was, Harrington himself was never really an asshole. 

Sure he went along with the assholes, and he definitely egged them on if not outright participated in some of the lower tier shitty activities, but he wasn’t the guy slamming people into lockers. 

(Eddie, in fact, has a hazy memory of Steve telling off Hagan for doing said locker slamming.) 

It didn’t make him a good guy--he’d had slung too many insults around to get that label--but in the rankings of assholery, his was of the average variety. 

Which means that Eddie cannot logic himself out of his own stupid desire to help.

Even if he really, really wants to.

“Yeah well, even assholes need assistance sometimes, and since I kicked your help out, it’s on to make up for it.” 

“No offense,” Steve slurs tiredly, “but I don’t think you’re any quieter than Dustin.” 

A smile ghosts over Eddie’s face. 

“I live in a tiny ass trailer, Harrington. Trust me,  I know how to be quiet. I simply choose not to be.” He moves, slow and careful, until he’s seated next to the fallen King on his stupidly huge (and very uncomfortable) couch. 

Steve’s eye follows him over, staring up as he white knuckles his sweatpants, washrag sitting crooked on his forehead. 

“I’m not sure I’m not gonna throw up again.” He admits after a moment. 

“And that right there is one of the things I can help with. Provided,” Eddie waggles his eyebrows, “that you don’t mind taking a more recreational route for your recovery?” 

“....are you offering me drugs?” 

“I am indeed.” Eddie confirms with a real smile, plucking the offending baggie out of a pocket. 

“You ever done shrooms, your majesty?” 

Steve huffs a quiet noise that might have been a snort, had he put any effort behind it. 

“How is that going to help?” 

“Be-cauuuuuse,” Eddie draws the words out, still a showman even if he is doing his level best to talk as quietly as possible, “shrooms are what we call a psychedelic, and those are pretty well known among certain circles as the headache healer.” 

Provided one took the medicinal amount and not the down-the-rabbit-hole amount. 

Harrington’s eyes are back open, only this time they’re looking at Eddie’s fingers the same way a dog looks at a nail trimmer: concerned and not entirely unsure it wasn’t going to bite him. 

“I’m not…” He cuts himself off, frowning. 

“You’ve bought plenty of my weed, Harrington. Trust me this isn’t any different.” Eddie tells him. 

Isn’t offended in the slightest--this reaction is pretty typical for people who have only smoked the ganja. 

Even the ones who asked to try for something with a little more ‘umph.’ 

“S’not that.”Steve admits quietly. “I uh. Had a bad trip. While back.” 

“Ah, gunshy.” Eddie says it without a lick of judgment, because Eddie’s been there.

Or rather in the shower, at two am because he accidentally spilled LSD on his hand and promptly tripped balls for 48 hours after.  

 “I’ll hang around a bit, if you like.” He offers casually. “Make sure things don’t go sideways.”

He gets another huff-snort as Harrington’s watery eyes return their attention to him. 

“And what are you going to do if they do go sideways?”

“Put you back together again.”  

Eddie knows his grin is crooked, but can’t help it. He’s thinking about Humpty Dumpty and the King’s Men.  

Somehow he doesn’t see Steve Harrington cracking that easily—at least, not without putting up a good fight—but drugs did worse things to better people. 

“It really helps?” Steve asks, voice quiet. Doubtful.

Eddie presses his hands to his chest. “Scouts honor.”

“You were not a boy scout.” Steve tells him, but he’s struggling to sit up anyway, looking game. 

“Alright, so how do I do this?” He asks, though he’s already halfway down again, propped up on his elbows.

“First, you lay back down, and I’ll brew it into tea,” Eddie explains. 

“Tea?”

“Well, you could eat them straight, but I don’t think they’d taste too great. Not that I wouldn’t mind watching you try.”

Steve scowls. “Sadist.”

“Guilty,” Eddie replies, biting back the urge to sing-song it, keeping his voice down and steady. “Just a heads-up: they kick in fast, but I’ll go light on you—nothing like the ‘fun’ dose for the usual crowd.”

Which is how he ends up back in the kitchen, this time making tea and humming to himself, before offering the final brewed concoction to Harrington.

Who downs it like a shot, because he’s a fucking frat-bro at heart. 

“I didn’t find a teacup for you to do that.” 

Between a full-body shudder and a dramatic grimace, Steve chokes out “Not gonna lie I didn’t think we owned a teacup.” 

“What, do you think I just have them in my van?”

“Honestly? Yeah.” 

Which is kind of hysterical, and something Eddie may be doing--not that he’s telling Harrington that. 

“And now we wait!” He announces instead of rambling about teacups, nearly clapping his hands together before he remembers the migraine Steve is soldiering through with surprising grit. 

Eddie himself would have turned into a whiny mess, so he can’t help but admire the guy’s restraint.

“Waiting to see if I hurl again, you mean?” Steve mutters, flopping backward onto the couch. “That tasted like battery acid.”

“Think it’s coming back up?”

“No clue.”

They sit in silence for a second, then Eddie pokes, “Maybe it’s best if you crash in your room, man. You look like death warmed over, and this couch sucks.” 

An understatement, if there ever was one. The fucking thing didn’t seem to be made for people to actually sit on. 

Reluctantly, Steve pulls himself up, heading toward his room. Eddie tags along, snarky grin covering the way he holds his hands out in case the jock ahead of him slips on the stairs and takes them both out. 

(Unlike Mayfield, Eddie does not pretend Steve doesn’t outclass him weight wise. The man was built like a brickhouse, and he has to fight to keep his eyes up toward Steve’s hair instead of on his ass.) 

Thankfully, he’s saved from all R-rated thoughts by the sheer horror of Harrington’s bedroom. 

“Harrington, I’ve found the source of all your migraines.” Eddie tells him, tone as serious as he’s ever been.

“Ha-ha.” Steve deadpans, stepping into his plaid fucking room. 

“I’m not kidding, I’m getting a headache and I’ve been here less than five seconds.” 

The whole place truly is a nightmare--like someone took one of those plaid hunting jackets and themed an entire room around it. 

Fucking rich people. 

“Trust me, it’s not the wallpaper.” 

“Given how you’re weaving on your feet, I think it’s safe to say I don’t trust you at all.” Eddie tells him, half helping half dragging Steve towards the bed. 

It’s a comfy looking thing and Harrington falls into it gratefully, immediately crawling under the covers. 

“You know where to find me?” Eddie asks him, refusing to think Harrington snuggling up in his bed is something cute. 

“Yeah?”

“Good. Hit me up next time your head gets bad. I’ll make sure to keep some of this,” He shakes the little baggie, “on hand.” 

Steve’s pulled the covers all the way up past his chin, but he moves it down a little to properly cock an eye at Eddie. 

“Dare I ask what you're gonna charge for that?”

“Let’s call it a fair trade for all those times you’ve driven the freshman home from Hellfire.” 

If Steve even recalls this conversation, that is. Eddie hadn’t exactly given him the “fun” kind of dose, but then, he himself has never tested out what dose is needed to cure headaches rather than simply having  fun destroying one's own ego. 

He supposes that’s something he and Harrington both will have to test, between them--because Eddie meant it when he offered the drugs for free.

No one deserves to suffer from the kind of migraine Harrington clearly had. 

“Think you’re good to drop off.” Eddie tells him, after making sure Steve is happily content in his bed. 

Checks his watch to make sure enough time has passed to safely call it, before beginning to attempt his way out of Steve’s god-awful bedroom. 

Which of course, is when Harrington reaches out, looping his fingers around Eddie’s wrist. 

It freezes him in place. 

In a moment that is so utterly selfish and stupid that Eddie will loudly insist it was a hallucination should Harrington ever dare ask about it, he turns his palm and moves so that he’s clasping Steve’s fingers with his own. 

“Thanks. For all this.” Steve whispers, as they hold hands for a moment. 

Eddie squeezes his fingers against the younger man’s before he moves to make his retreat, flashing a peace sign over his shoulder as he goes.  

“Anytime, big boy.” 

Anytime. 

xxx

The thing no one tells you about creating a doctrine, is that at some point or another, someone’s going to hold you to it. 

In Eddie’s case it’s four very pissed off teenagers.

He has a gold medal in mental gymnastics and a silver in denial. Left on his own devices he could easily excuse everything that happened yesterday. 

Reclassify the fallen King as pathetic, and the kids' weird loyalty to him as a holdover from his babysitting days. 

Blame their nosy-ness on them being involved in Harrington’s life, and happily go back to mocking their relationship with renewed vigor because now he’s not going to handwave their behavior as being afraid of Harrington. 

Nope, they clearly and willingly, have attached themselves to the King, which means Eddie gets to make fun of them for life. 

Pity they don’t leave Eddie to his own devices. 

In fact, the little shits hit him up first thing in the morning, early enough that he's’ a little suspicious that the boys slept over at Max’s trailer. 

“We’re not done talking about Steve.” Mayfield tells him and given the determined (Henderson) angry (Sinclair) and put out (Wheeler Jr.) faces glaring at him from over her shoulder, Eddie figures his chances for getting out of this conversation are slim to none.

“Good morning to you too.” He snarks, voice gravel-deep with sleep. “What do you little shits want?”

“I literally just said.” Max rolls her eyes so hard he thinks about commenting that they may stick back there, only to decide that makes him sound too much like a teacher for his liking. 

(Besides if they get stuck, he’ll have an excuse to whack her on the back of her head without getting murdered for it.

…well. 

An attempt at an excuse, anyway.) 

“And who says I have anything I want to talk about?” He fires back, leaning a shoulder against the old metal doorframe. 

Just because he understood what they wanted didn’t mean he was going to make it easy. 

“Would you just let us in?” 

“No.” 

“Eddie.” Dustin whines, and Eddie redirects his frown his way. “Come on.” 

“Well I suppose if you say it that way,” Eddie hums thoughtfully. “No.” 

“Steve’s sick, you asswipe.” Max snaps angrily. 

“I know,” He volleys back, brightly sarcastic. “I saw him yesterday.”

Because it’s Mayfield, she matches him tit for tat, a mimicry of his sarcastic drawl entering her voice. “Good! You get to see him today too.”

And just like that their little ambush makes sense.

(He’s got to find a new way to get the damn kids to fear him, clearly his usual menacingness  just isn’t cutting it anymore.) 

“And why would I do that?” 

He’s done his good deed. He helped Harrington out, and even offered free drugs to help him get his migraines under control. 

Checking up on the guy was overkill.  

“We were gonna do it, but someone let it slip that Steve was sick.” A cutting glance is given to Henderson, who makes a face but otherwise holds his ground. 

“And his mom called everyone else's parents with instructions that we leave him alone until he feels better.”  

“So now if we go over there,” Sinclair finishes for his girlfriend, “we get grounded.” 

Which neatly answers every question that just popped into Eddie’s head. 

The threat makes sense for the boys--Eddie’s met Claudia Henderson and though she has that bubbly, easy to confuse nature of suburbanites everywhere, there was an undercurrent in her eyes of someone who knew more than she was letting on. 

Or perhaps, someone who simply knew what they wanted, and was happy to settle and wait for it. 

 Likewise the Sinclair and Wheeler parental units seem to want to keep in her--and Steve’s, no doubt, given he carts their kids around--good graces. 

Given Mayfield’s mom wasn’t even home last night, her participation in this farce does not make sense and Eddie narrows his eyes at her in warning. 

“I fail to see how this is my problem.” He says instead of directly calling her out.

She knows he knows, and he’s smart enough to figure out how to relay that without saying it directly. 

(An action taken out of respect for surviving a bad home life, and absolutely not because he’s terrified she’ll crawl through his window to enact revenge in the middle of the night.) 

“It’s your problem because you owe him one.” she tells him firmly. “And us.”

Oh no he does not. 

“How so?” He challenges with a snorted laugh. 

“You did kind of storm into his house and yell a lot.” Sinclair points out. He’s doing better at speaking up, Eddie realizes with a twisted sense of pride and dread. 

Not quite so easy to steamroll after his outburst yesterday. 

A part of him hopes that sticks around--Sinclair needs a spine, and not just because Mayfield will keep running circles around him until he grows one. 

The rest of Eddie is pissed off that he decided to get one now, when it directly impacted Eddie’s Saturday morning sleeping plans.  

Leave it to these dickheads to use a good deed against him.

“Look--we can’t make sure he’s okay. You can.” Mayfield steps up to jam a painted fingernail in Eddie’s chest. “He won’t let us do anything that will actually help him. You, he can't stop.” 

He does not take a step backward and thus lose all the cool points he has left in the eyes of the younger Hellfire members, but only because he’s already leaned up against the doorframe. 

He bares his teeth at her in a silent snarl instead. 

“We made it worse.” She admits, voice sharp. “And I don’t know how to make it better, but you seem to be able to, so congrats Munson--you get to go again!” 

Which gets Eddie’s back right up. 

He pushes off the doorframe, ready to tell Mayfield--and all his little dipshits--right off, except this is when Wheeler Jr., of all people, decides to add in his two cents. 

“If you don’t go, no one else will.” He looks off to the side while he says it, arms crossed tight across his chest and spitting the words out like he's admitting to a crime. “Robin’s not coming back until Monday and Nancy's got some stupid thing, so you’re literally the only person who can go.” 

Well just stab him in the heart, why don’t you. 

“What are the chances of you fucking back off to whatever hole you crawled out of if I refuse?” He asks, already knowing that he’s done for.

Accepted his fate, because he knows what it’s like not to have someone to rely on, when you need them the most. 

“Zero.” Sinclair and Henderson chant as one. 

“Well then.” He tells them with the biggest, most put upon sigh he can manage. “Guess you got me in a box here.” 

Mayfield grins at him.

It reminds him vaguely of a shark. 

A bloodthirsty, slightly demonic, mean shark. 

“Good. Go get dressed.”

“Oh I’m doing this right now, am I?” He complains, but he’s already moving to go back into his trailer. 

“We’re not leaving until you do!” Mayfield yells at him.

Eddie slams the door in her face. 

(He’s never adopting freshmen again, as long as he fucking lives.)

[eych-two-oh]

Imagine. Pure Vanilla retiring from being a King tm so he returns to his studies to further his cause of helping cookies. He comes back to the academy and finds that his fav long bearded monocled teacher was replaced by a chirpy and annoying dude that doesn’t look older than him. Said dude encourages cheating so long as it’s done well. Said dude wears a jester fit most of the time. Said dude quotes fake shit and he finds out its fake shit after fact-checking it. Said dude teaches ridiculously well. Said dude also gave him his first failing mark. He bears with it bc he’s a student and he’s been through stuff worse than this. He finds out eventually his fav teacher and the annoying guy are the same people. He has a break down over it for several weeks.

[caineinthecorner]

Languages (The Others)

★ Based on my language general hcs + the brothers' hcs.

Hi I am sleep deprived. Behold part two of my shitty hc delusions wooooo.

"Caine you missed some" yeah I'm lazy (+ don't know their characterization well enough). If you want to add hcs for the guys I skipped you can but in the meantime I'll go with the basic bitch options

Gentle reminder I make shit up. (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)

★ Solomon.

Okay so like I said with Asmo he knows french (and they're both nasty with it)

Basically he rizzed up Asmo in french

Using the dude he was in based out of he also knows English (native probably), Welsh, German, full-ass Demon Tongue and like some latin for magic bs. Idk

(bcs the guy lived nearby those countries in ye old Europe(tm) and something something immortal so why tf not learn languages while at it)

(also of course he learned demon tongue. He wants to rizz up demons and what better way to do that)

He learned demon tongue from random demons and a lot of trial and error

Plus he knows japanese if we are under the pretense that mc is japanese.

So like Solomon tries to use language rizz to get close to you as the other human student in Devildom. So basically using the Asmo trick with you.

... He's kinda painfully obvious with it

(how tf did Asmodeus fall for this shit?)

If you don't speak any of the languages he is fluent in his ass will ABSOLUTELY pick 'em up and be like "hey I want to learn:)"

He uses language as a tool to get what he wants basically

No wonder him and Asmo get along

If you know a language that is not loquar-translatable and he speaks it as well prepare to get secret-talk'd a lot.

Not having people spying your convos is a incredibly valuable asset in Devildom

Especially since you're around the brothers almost 24/7 and they're fucking VIGILANT

Oh also he 100% knows that Asmo fakes being shit at English.

But he's a simp so 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠  ⁠)⁠ㄏ

★ Luke.

FUNNILY ENOUGH. Two things:

Yes he doesn't need Loquar to communicate with you since he's an angel BUT

For some reason (cough your heritage cough) he keeps messing up in which language speak to you with.

Angel instincts are telling him to just use whatever language with you but the thing is that You Don't Know Whatever Language

Which is odd because that's something he only does with fellow angels????

But you are human so

He doesn't think much of it. He's probably just confused because he's around mean demons! >:T

(His basic subconscious instincts are harder to control since he's low ranking and his Angel brain is going "You = angel = language doesn't matter")

But since he keeps somewhat messing up around you he decides to gesture to hell when talking to you just in case

so you get the gist through his mannerisms in case his words get fucky

His least favorite language ever is Demon Tongue. Even outside of Not Liking Demons he doesn't like how throat-y and intensive it is.

↑ that is a popular Angel opinion btw. Demon Tongue in general is just annoying to use for them and barely any Angels use it outside of in-the-moment communication with Devildom natives.

If you ask him his preferred language he'll say some form of Latin since it's the preferred language of most high ranked angels, as well as Michael's.

But it's actually English.

★ Simeon.

Since he is was a high rank angel, he doesn't mess up what language speak to you with. He has real good control of stuff like that that comes with experience and age.

(in fact he's very confused why Luke keeps messing up so bad around you but doesn't think much of it since Luke is technically still a fledgling)

I already said this but yeah his preferred language is Archaic Latin (shared it with Lucifer pre-fall).

Ever since Lucifer's fall he switched to plain English and that's the answer he'll give you if you ask.

Only Angel that isn't bothered speaking demon tongue and will do so at his own leisure.

If you try to learn the demon language he is unironically so helpful because he isn't a spiteful bitch like Lucifer and actually teaches you shit without throwing you into the wolves

In fact Simeon is amused as hell over the fact that Lucifer is making you learn the hard stuff first. That is so him.

He's like the good cop of the learning dynamic. Cool substitute teacher vibes

Simeon finds accents to be the cutest thing ever since it is an inherently odd concept for someone fluent in Everything Ever

He has (jokingly) cooed over Luci's accent when he speaks Latin nowadays. Lucifer is not at all amused.

★ Barbatos.

He knows every language.

... Yeah that's it that's the list

Look at me dead in the eyes and tell me this motherfucker does not speak Sumerian

Ofc he knows every human language ever. And Devildom's. He knows™.

Funniest thing is that he doesn't even need Loquar to talk to you. He just deadass speaks your language with full fluency and you Never Notice

You only notice one day while having a normal convo with him and then Diavolo walks in speaking full deadass gibberish somehow and you're like ????? and Barbatos says "oh apologies I forgot to apply Loquar to you here you go"

Like deadass he would fuck with you so hard when it comes to languages.

Do not go to this man for language advice he will teach you proper stuff in the most incorrect way possible

(Probably! Or probably not! It depends! On what? Who the fuck knows™!)

He's deadass a roulette of proper, legitimate advice or literal shitposting

He wrote the Voynich manuscript. It was a housekeeping journal he was keeping in a dead Devildom idiom that ended up in the human realm by accident

He didn't retrieve it solely because seeing humans go insane over it was funny as hell and he has a secondary copy anyway. That book has nothing relevant in it besides like two recipes.

He did go to check back on it once to write down a meat pie recipe Diavolo's father liked bcs he didn't have on the copy

Barbatos is the definition of "wtf what language was that" "yes."

He and Lucifer have random days where they just pick a language to speak to each other. It helps to maintain fluency.

Barbatos jumpscared Satan once by going, full ass unprompted mid convo, "Oh right you speak Tagalog."

He knows what languages everyone speaks like a white girl knows zodiac charts

★ Diavolo.

Ok so he probably knows English since it is Solomon's native and humanity's current universal(ish) language

Like of course he wants to communicate with humans! Of course he'll learn their language!!!

Unlike Barbatos and Lucifer who are very impressive Polyglots he's realistic in his language stuff. The more down-to-earth of the three

His English is hilarious

Not particularly because he says things wrong but his accent and tone just makes it sound incredibly funny

He sounds exactly like a dubbed-over superhero doing a friendship monologue At All Times

He is so earnest with it that you don't have the heart to explain why you're laughing

Anyhow fun fact:

Loquar for some reason translates what he says in Demon Tongue the most literal ass sense possible for literally no reason

Which is odd(tm) but mostly just funny as all hell

Everyone has been troubleshooting whatever the fuck happens to Loquar Ad Vos with Diavolo but no idea so far.

The phrase "have you tried unpapplying it and applying it again" has been uttered more than once unironically

The working theory is that since Diavolo is royalty and Loquar Ad Vos was created with the sampling of normal demons it works wrong on him since there's something different(tm)

Reverse engineering the Loquar spell to work on him has been in the works for a while. Loquar is drafted like shit since it is an old human-oriented spell (Basically like spaghetti code needing to be rewritten), so it proves a bit troublesome.

You later find that Diavolo speaks in a very uniquely pronounced manner

↑ Think of it like Devildom royalty has a very distinctive Way Of Speaking. Like an accent but also not. Probably magic related in some way(?)

"do you want to consume nourishment" ← Diavolo's ass getting mistranslated

So yeah Barbatos or Lucifer kinda have to lend a hand when you two communicate.

If you're English speaking then you two kinda communicate that way sometimes. You reassure him on his accent and help him along if he gets anything wrong.

(he's fluent-ish in Japanese as well if we are running in the assumption that the reason why MC's canonically japanese is because they needed someone who A) speaks a language translatable by Loquar Ad Vos B) is also a language Diavolo knows and C) is not of the same social background as Solomon)

He will get so unapologetically excited when you start learning demon tongue. You two can!!! Communicate even more!!!!!

Demons will be genuinely mortified if you gain Diavolo's accent while speaking demon tongue. Why does this random ass human speak like royalty ತ⁠_⁠ತ

Very (un)subtle way to tell everyone that you're besties/partner/whatever of the literal prince of Devildom.

Something something dragon being possessive something

[deadguywalkin]

MORE sebsamalex hcs because i am GAY and EVIL + music taste and bodies hcs

in a relationship together

sam bursts into song at any trigger word. alex joins in. sebastian gets annoyed. (affectionately)

sebastian likes his personal space. sam also likes sebastian’s personal space. 

sam shoves his hands up their shirts while they’re just talking. about anything. he’s clingy and needs skin contact 

‘i don’t feel like talking to anyone right now, but i guess i’m not opposed to silently being held.’

sebalex always do ‘the hand thing tm’ for sam when he’s overwhelmed or nervous.

“Alex save me alex” “WHO NEEDS SAVING?????!!!!!!!!🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️‼️”

“i’m out of facepaint! gimme your eyeliner” “..no?”

tucking seb’s hair behind his ear before they kiss him

hands definitely go through sams hair when they kiss him

hands go to alex’s neck, shoulders, chest,… this guy gets violated compared to the cute hair touching honestly. 

kidding they also just hold his face gently. alex my love grbrbrgrnrbbrbfnf

alex has to take everything verryyy very slowly to adjust to actually dating a guy for the first time. 

he’s also very very surprised to be actually loved and known for the first time, ‘what do you mean you recorded the game for me because i forgot to…? bro, i’ll cry’

sambastian just constantly making out. any time. any where. gay emo boys who don’t care about their reputation sighs

sambastian also love giving each other a shit ton of prominent and visible hickeys to the neck, collar, shoulders and jaws.

general stuff 

seb unintentionally has very flirty body language. he’s just naturally a man whore. the way he moves physically is stiff but he still looks up at taller guys with half-lidded eyes while talking in a low voice. looking down at shorter girls with a soft smirk with his dimples.

samalex are unintentionally flirty vocally. “i wouldn’t want you to go hungry. i care about you. you should be eating well. we could grab some breakfast. you and me. alone.” “why don’t you come to my next gig..? i’ll save you a special spot. just for you.” which they mean as friends but they just don’t hear the underlying tones.

alex would have a good voice if he wasn’t constantly straining it, unfortunately he loves belting passionately and straining his voice for whatever reason

sam is actually GOOD at singing. he’s also a natural when it comes to anything that’s artistic (painting, sketching, music, etc)

alex snores LOUDLY sometimes

sam drools in his sleep also sometimes

sebastian does not sleep. or is never awake. what the fuck is going on with him

all 3 of them got something going on. autism+dyslexia, depression+some sleep disorder, adhd. soorgy :( i don’t make the rules it’s canon :(

sam has a little nose bump like this :3

——

sam: [insert sam talking way too much]

seb: *throws a ball* go fetch, boy

sam: *does it no questions asked, happily*

alternately he would also just feed him any chewy candy he has on hand.

——

sam: i can’t wait to see you again. i love you, alex.

alex: dued 😆 like in a bro way? 😆 i bro you too bro 😆

sam: alex, please be my boyfriend.

alex: boyfreind? like a boy and a friend? i already am! 😆

sam: alex, i want to make out with you.

alex: dude? takeout with me?! one step ahead of you, foods on the way! 😆

——

seb: i wanna grab a midnight snack

alex: you’re the midnight snack.

seb: …?ew

alex: sorry. i mean. um. sorry. i mean. dude. you are. um.

music:

alex: listens to ‘whatever comes on the radio while i’m working out’. hype songs that get him in the mood. also kebby implanted abba into my brain. he just doesn’t listen to music that much.

he’s also somewhat into the strokes, the only band he likes/is consistent with. (reptilia, someday, ode to the mets)

sam: high energy rock, experimental rock, and pretty much anything honestly. 2000s/2010s rock mostly. he listens to everything. anything that sounds good no matter what genre immediately goes into his playlist. he just has an ear for good music.

weezer

blink 182

sublime

the white stripes

wheatus

the frights

and probably every single music artist to ever exist

also sambastian listen to csh together. you’ll have to fight me on this and lose if you disagree

sebastian: grunge, rock, nu metal, general metal, emo, and punk. dabbles in some goth. mostly stuff from the 80s/2000s. he listens to ‘that one time your dad’s friend picked you up from school and played music in the car��

the smashing pumpkins

green day

siouxsie and the banshees

soundgarden

alice in chains

pearl jam

and probably a shit ton of underground stuff i can’t think of 

bodys /ref

alex: not much to imagine here since he’s very confirmed LOL god bless that 6’1 beefcake. dude’s a statue

sam: pretty tall. good looking legs because he was a skater boy (she said see you later, boy) perfect ass. some scars from skating incidents because he’s clumsy

not too much muscle but has that little vertical line down his stomach that indicates he’s growing some abs (not sure what the english word for it is) 

his arms are also pretty thick ? big ? idk

broad shoulders, nice legs and okay arms. he has some bandaids on him aswell because this guy cannot catch a break. he’s not boney nor meaty, a good inbetween.

a few stick and pokes ? i think thats what people call them like a diy tattoo

also his hips don’t lie 🤫

sebastian: lanky, slightly visible ribcage. he’d have broad shoulders if they weren’t slightly curved inwards from having shit posture all his life. upsidown triangle build. contrary to popular belief, he has some muscle in his arms. to work under a motorcycle on your back has to give you some strength. maybe a sleeper build.

cis seb has a very very defined addam’s apple

i can also see a different version of him where he could be stubby looking and have some chub to him.

i also think he’d have some tattoos on him. t-scars and a more defined waist if we’re also mixing in the trans hc. maybe bat tattoos or some kind of fantasy themed tattoos covering over his t scars?

bonus: 

them as kitty breeds

alex: bengal

sam: classic orange cat

sebastian: one of those rustic black cats with the orange patches

+ this image of soogyu is engraved into my head i think this is very them with seb.. the jacket sharing and sleepy head drooping sobs it’s them

shorter dump today aswell bleg

[yall-hate-kids-tourney]

Loser Round 4: Damian Wayne (DC) vs. Jason Todd (DC)

A rematch? It's so funny how the bracket turned out this way.

Propaganda under the cut.

Damian Wayne (9-14):

Damian is a kid who was raised as an assassin and because of that when he first appears he has some really messed up ideas of how to prove himself to his father by being aggressive with the criminals they capture and attacking his brother. Because of this people act like he is the most evil character ever and refuse to give him any grace. They make him out to be this awful irredeemable monster who just wants to kill his brother and hurt people. If the fandom isn’t making his out to be The Worst(tm) then they are ignoring his existence all-together. He is a really interesting character who has done some not so great things but he’s grown and learned a lot through various character arcs (as much of an arc as a comic book character can have) and he deserves to be acknowledged for himself and not just as a villain so that people can woobify his brother.

——

HES JUST A LITTLE BABY GUY!!!!! Little baby man raised as an assassin and learning how to be a real person <3. But because he was kind of a dick and also a little stabby early-on, especially to the fandom's main "so sad uwu depressed baby" blorbo (and also he's not white), people treat him like he's satan incarnate

Jason Todd (~12):

Most of the Tumblr fandom likes this guy but if you step outside this website then wham so many people say he got what he deserved as a kid and Batman can't be cool if he's a dad so it's important for Batman to trash-talk his dead child constantly so we can all agree what a bad idea it was. Also wanna highlight that a lot of the records we have from fans at the time were clear they disliked Robin for BEING a child. Like a lot of the little dude characters in this tournament are treated too harshly for making an ugly choice and the fans aren't being understanding or sympathetic that the choice is made by a child character who is immature and not developed and strong enough to make a good choice and stuff. But THIS little dude was specifically hated FOR being a child. People wanted tough loner guy Batman not Batdad and his little buddy. The first Robin would drive back from college and guest star sometimes and be advertised as the Teen Wonder and people were like yeah okay but then Batman actually starts being a single parent for a child with needs and people were like UGH not the BOY Wonder. Today pretty much everywhere you see Batman fans saying Batman is better solo, no kid, it's not realistic to have a kid, a kid shouldn't be in the movies blah. Even if the comics they always find a way to send away the new kid so that Batman never has to parent. So all the Robins are being excluded from the narrative but I think this one is THE symbol of Batman fans hating a child character just for being a child.

-

Robin, Jason Todd, THE hated child character. In the 1980s, Batman comics had become increasingly dark and gritty. According to editor O'Neil himself, the courted audience wasn't kids but 19-40 year old men with disposable income. Batman's child sidekick, Robin, was offensively campy and childish. Fans called him wimpy, annoying, dumb, bratty, etc. Also people complained that Batman acting like an affectionate dad was unmanly and gay. Robin acts violent and emotional and people are like "ew he's so childish and emotional"—and then Batman literally acts just as murderously and emotionally within literally the same exact story and people are like "wow he's so dark and tortured". So in 1988 (after brutalizing Batgirl to get rid of her for being too bright and nice and kid-friendly), DC held a paid poll for fans to vote for Robin to live or die. O'Neil claims he heard a fan (a grown man with a dayjob as a lawyer) programmed a phone to spam kill votes. One fanguy claimed that he sold his Mercedes to buy kill votes (probably an exaggeration but still). By less than 1% margin, the vote decided to kill Robin in a spectacularly violent way. Anyway the 1989 Batman movie brought in a huge wave of new child comicbook fans who liked the new Robin (a very cool teenage high school Robin with a driver's license and a girlfriend), and DC started a separate Robin-less Batman series called Legends of the Dark Knight to make the anti-Robin writers and fans happy. But to this day, many fans agree it was a good idea to kill off the other Robin so that his foolish death reminds other characters to never be childish and stupid again. Bonus: the current Robin (usually a traumatized 10-year-old) has also been facing some pretty loud hatred for over 15 years.

[shsl-literary-critic]

Mikan: It's kinda messed up and nasty vampires drink blood in my opinion, like, Pepsi costs a 1.75 Ibuki: WHERE ARE YOU GETTING PEPSI FOR 1.75!? THAT SHIT IS LIKE 2.30 MINIMUM Mikan: Hospital Mahiru: who pays 2.30 for a Pepsi? Mikan: Not me, I am paying a 1.75 at the hospital Sonia: I pay 2.50 but I am Novoselician Mikan: I feel like we are getting off topic Hiyoko: Blood is free??? Natsumi: So is pepsi if you steal it MC: Why in god's name would a vampire drink Pepsi? Kazuichi: Why would anyone drink Pepsi??? Akane: Femboy Kazuichi: Huh???? Fuyuhiko: am I having a stroke? Hajime: you might want to go to the hospital then Nagito: I hear the Pepsi is cheaper there

Natsumi: we tried things your way Hajime: No we didn't?? Natsumi: I did in my head and it didn't work

MC: ever want to talk about your emotions TM? Hajime: no Nagito: I do! MC: We know Nagito Nagito: I fucking hate myself Hajime: we know Nagito

Ibuki: It’s Wednesday my Dudes Ibuki: aaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Natsumi: Road work ahead? Natsumi, hitting the gas: SURE HOPE IT DOES

Hiyoko; GET YOUR FUCKING DOG BITCH Gundham: she does not bite Hellhound/Precious: *growling and barking at Hiyoko* Hiyoko: YES THE FUCK SHE DO

Hajime @ Nagito and Natsumi who have been working to annoy him for the last hour: JUST SHUT UP!!! I am going to kill the next person I see I swear to god MC: HI! Hello! I am so happy to see you!!!! Nagito and Natsumi: *start dying of laughter* Hajime: Oh my god… Hi, hi what’s going on-

Mukuro about the Warriors of Hope: Okay they are children, Junko- they shouldn't be your pawns Junko: The children yearn for despair, Mukuro-

Mikan: Do you think different paints have different tastes? Ibuki: They do! Mikan:.... why are you so certain?

Akane: Goldilocks was stupid for not sleeping in a bed to big for her Akane: ohhhh noooo I'm too comfy! Shut up

Chihiro: I am a morosexual apparently, I am attracted to morons and morons only Chihiro: I watched Taka and Mondo both argue that the only reason homosexuality is illegal is because if it wasn't bros would just marry their bros. Chihiro: I want them both so bad....

MC: you have a very sincere sense of humility Nagito: I prefer the term self loathing

Nekomaru: Akane I am begging you to go get medical attention!!! Akane: Oh is this our stab wound????

Hajime:,... I think I am falling for you Nagito: Please get up-

Ibuki: We have fun! Don't we MC??? MC:... I have never been more stressed in my entire life.

MC: Oh fiddlesticks! That really ruffles my feathers Ernest:... Please just say fuck

MC: Do I smell something burning? Nagito, leaning over the counter: just my burning desire for you both Hajime: FUCKING THE TOASTER IS ON FIRE

MC: When I said you should try being friendly this isn't... exactly what I meant... Hiyoko, aggressively whisking Matcha: Oh so now I am toooo friendly??? There is no pleasing you! Junko, who broke into the dorm two hours ago: For real! Quit picking on her!

Kazuichi: Why does Akane call you baby girl? Nekomaru: THE SAME REASON NATSUMI CALLS YOU THAT

Sonia: What is your body count? Natsumi: Sex or murder?

[diz-eaze]

oh my gawd

OH MY GYATT

MALE READER MY BELOVED😭😭💖💖💖

DUDE IMAGINE MALE READER IS THAT ONE POPULAR GUY IN CLASS WHOSE JUST FRIENDS WITH EVERY MALE CLASSMATE.

And since Scaramouche is a newbie it's just right for male reader to try and be friends with him.

I feel like since reader is a guy here it takes longer for Scaramouche to like him. Especially since the reader is loud, obnoxious, reckless, annoying, outgoing- just the complete opposite of Scaramouche. So male reader had to make an effort to find Scaramouche in the bathrooms and janitors closets to hang out

(actual footage of reader and his minions friends out to find Scaramouche: https://youtube.com/shorts/Z-_vOUqRAwQ?si=_6wTQ0i5GquWUMew)

And not to mention Scaramouche will have to reflect on whether or not he's actually gay or this is just normal bromance y'know.

THE YOUTUBE VIDEO IS SENDINGGG MEEEE 😭😭😭😭

i eat up a popular (y/n) so bad because i just know scara's clenching his fist underneath the desk and seething in absolute hatred for anyone within a 5m radius of (y/n). you're the type of guy that girls swoon over and the teachers praise. whenever you walk down the halls, it's impossible to encounter someone who doesn't wave to you; you're just that friendly.

and maybe your circle of friends is like one of those stereotypical jock groups, but you're truly a genuinely nice guy, not one of those types who only act nice in order to gain something. your actions of kindness are often unseen by the masses, only witnessed by those you're helping. you shine so bright it hurts to look at you, because sometimes you're more akin to a star brought down to earth than human.

and since you're friendly, it's as if you have this life goal to befriend everyone in the school, and next on your chopping block is the snobbish, outcast kunikuzushi.

there's a large chance that what he felt for you at the beginning isn't love or fondness, but rather hatred and annoyance. he hates the type of guy you are, boisterously loud and welcoming, acting as if your expanding list of friends isn't bound to backstab you one of these days. in kuni's eyes, you are so laughably naive, it's crazy. you're clearly brought up from a background that never taught you how the real world worked at all, and he can't wait for the awakening you'll experience when you inevitably realize that it isn't all sunshine and rainbows.

hate boner for the popular guy aside, kuni wants nothing to do with you. so he remains in the shadows the best that he can; the back of the line, last one to exit the classroom, the farthest seat in the classroom, and eating lunch in seclusion.

until, of course, you come in ruining everything.

it's a long process, and it takes a while for kuni to truly warm up to you. perhaps you tried befriending him during the last term of freshman year, and it's only during the cusp of junior year did he began to acknowledge you as his friend. from then, he's quick to develop romantic feelings and start going bonkers at every person who tries to approach you, regardless of platonic and/or romantic intentions. you being popular makes it impossible for kuni to gatekeep you at allllll.

you try to include kuni into your jock(tm) friend group, because you want to make him one of the boyssss(tm) but you're kinda fighting a losing battle here because he does not get along with anyone !! he keeps going around critiquing every player's move during games, only to turn around and praise you to the high heavens. he's such a glazer :///

and don't get him started on the crowds you gather after games,,, regardless if your team won or lost, there'll be people waiting with gifts and bouquets to give. one time, a girl sneaked her phone number into one of the flower's petal and kuni immediately dumped it into the trashcan when you weren't looking,,, tsk.

[marley-manson]

Doctor Winchester Mr Hyde is genuinely a pretty great episode.

Loved Hawkeye telling Winchester he's been there and it sucks, love him showing concern for Charles multiple times and being particularly joke-free about it in the ending tag, love Charles asking him to proofread a paper lol. Loooove Hawkeye's fear of mice and especially love him basically showing off that fear when he asks to pet Daisy for luck in front of the marines and makes a show of cringing. And BJ automatically doing the thing certain people do when they find out you're scared of something and shove it in your face to make you freak out lmao, that's exactly correct for him.

Charles demanding Radar go fetch his opera glasses when he's about to dose the mouse, and then in the next scene he actually is watching the race through binoculars was an amazing detail lol.

Also I overall liked the way Charles taking speed was handled - the ending was a little DARE-esque ofc, but generally it was a pretty light and funny touch. Klinger directly asking for them (with 0 narrative condemnation) only for Charles to condescend and then take them himself was great, as was this exchange between them: "Do you want extreme depression, chronic fatigue?" "I already got those!" a+

The drugs actually helping Charles for a while was solid and there was little in the way of overtly impared behaviour which I like - more sold by little details, like Hawkeye mentioning that Charles' 27 page paper seems to be all one sentence.

First mention of Honoria is her marrying 2 dudes in succession and getting ostracized from the family which doesn't seem to fit later mentions unless she divorced second dude and was welcomed back, which tbf isn't implausible lol. Though I don't really remember, so maybe it's possible that Honoria is the family black sheep and only Charles remains in touch with her, which would be interesting.

Last time I watched I had the minor complaint that Hawkeye and co admit to the marines that their mouse was on speed and I considered that annoying when My Hawkeye(TM) happily cheats to win competitions against random army guys ie Requiem for a Lightweight - buuut to be fair to the episode he did say they should "give the marines their money back while we're still alive" suggesting he thinks they might find out they were cheated? I don't see how lol, and it's still a little too moralistic cheating is wrong-esque for me, but I'll accept it as an explanation that keeps Hawkeye ic for me.

Anyway yeah, solidly written, good dialogue, good character moments, little oasis in this chunk of season 6.

[bookofmirth]

On every character sarah writes having the same personality: why does every main girl have to be this big planner who has multiple plans on backup and never tells people, only to surprise everyone when everything goes right at the end with no prior explanation... idk if I'm putting this right, but it just made me very... annoyed

Like yeah, that worked great with Aelin, sure, but for me it just doesn't fit with Bryce? Especially on how she was just thrown at this and suddenly figured out she was The Chosen One(tm). It really bugged me, idk

Fair warning, this post rips Bryce a new asshole - not as a person, but as a character that sjm created. So I'm putting it under the cut.

Just to start, in context I said that all the hofas characters ended up having the same personality - though you can make a case for her reusing a lot of the same descriptions and such for all of them. ANYWAY...

To me, the issue is not just that Bryce keeps doing things behind the scenes that we never get any hint of, it's a bigger issue that we never get a hint that she even gives a shit.

With Aelin, at least we already knew what she was working towards and why. We already knew what she cared about and how far she was willing to go to get it. Aelin caring about Terrasen and her court and saving the people she loved was never in question. Her trauma from finding her parents dead, her fear at losing the rest of the people she loved, the weight of responsibility that she felt, we knew all of those things pretty much from the get-go. Her tendency to shut people out could be considered a flaw because she didn't trust other people to help her. We don't know about Terrasen right away, and tbh I don't remember what history we get instead and so I need to reread, but I can point to very specific values, goals, and motivations that make Aelin act the way that she does.

But Bryce - the central problem with her as a character is that Bryce doesn't care about anything, and sjm never figured out what she cares about, either.

Characters need to have central things that they care about, that drive them, motivations, things that they fear and things they would go to great lengths to protect. They need flaws, and clear relationships to the world around them. I could make a list of those things for a lot of her characters. Not all, but most.

With Bryce, I have NO IDEA what those things are. That makes it so that when she randomly find Emile, it just seems like she did it to come across like a nice person. She doesn't care about what humans are experiencing, she shits on Vanir/fae all the time, she treats Hunt pretty poorly, she isn't close to Juniper or Fury (see: their near disappearance from hofas), Danika kept so many secrets from her that I seriously doubt the depth of their relationship. Bryce was working in that library museum thing for Jesiba (I'm already erasing the series from my memory oh my god) and going out and partying and that was all well and good, but... was she going to do those things when she's 200, too? I'm not even saying that she needs to like, go get married or whatever, but she literally has no goals in life!

SJM saying that Bryce is the fun, cute party girl who also has a deep, intellectual side, a pretty woman who can also kick ass, okay, but she needs a reason to kick ass. SJM completely forgot to include the second half of that equation, which is ironic since that was a big point of her character - to prove that women can be feminine and strong, wear high heels and be smart. She failed miserably in my opinion, if that really was the goal of Bryce's character.

When Aelin is snarky to people, I know why. When Bryce is a bitch, it comes out of nowhere and is often turned on people who actually deserve her time and attention and empathy (e.g. Sathia). Aelin is an asshole to that one dude whose name starts with a D because he's a man who is underestimating her and wants to refuse to let her lead because he assumes she will be bad at it. When Bryce is an asshole to Sathia, WHY. I mean really, I wanted to throw my book across the fucking page!!!! Because that's a perfect example of how, if Bryce was guided by a set of values (feminism, I guess?) then she would have responded very differently to Sathia, who has experienced literally the exact same thing Bryce has (being betrothed to someone against her will). Instead, Bryce throws that line back in her face about "well I never let that stop me" as if what Sathia has experienced is her own fault for... not trying enough??? PLEASE. ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW.

The whole "girlboss" thing needs.... something driving it. You can't just bulldoze people and call it being empowered. And I think that sjm has really, really simplified gender and sexuality in CC to the point that that's really the only distinction that matters. That's maybe another issue. I just have a lot of thoughts about these things lol.

Anyway. This is what happens when you write a character built on aesthetic and #girlpower, rather than making them a complete person with fears and values and joys and goals and motivations and flaws.

Okay one more point, this is NOT beyond sjm's capabilities. She obviously is much better at writing characters than this. I just think that sometimes, something suffers when you try new things. In CC, sjm was giving actual world building and magic systems a go. And the characters, really, REALLY fucking suffered for it.

[anthonysalazar]

rating the (canon) buffyverse ships based on how much i like them

angel + buffy (7/10) i think it's okay for what it is, but buffy clearly outgrows him in the end but omg that i will always remember you episode on ats is so tragic and made me appreciate them sm more

spike + buffy (9/10) OMG THE SCENE OF THEM IN SEASON 7 WHERE SPIKE SAYS HE LOVES HER NOT BECAUSE OF WHAT SHE DOES OR BECAUSE HE'S GETTING ANYTHING IN RETURN BUT BECAUSE OF WHO SHE IS AND WHAT SHE IS IS SO. i love them together omg.

riley + buffy (6/10) i don't like hate them? riley had sm potential as a character and as a boyfriend but good lord did they handle him badly. they could've made him a cute golden retriever boyfriend for buffy but instead they made him toxic masculinity TM. season 4 riley is enjoyable though, just once you get to season 5 he becomes annoying and pretty unbearable

willow + oz (8/10) SO CUTE!! i will always be mad that they wrote willow as a complete lesbian, as i know sexuality is fluid but her romance with both oz and tara read more as a bisexual woman rather than a lesbian. i wish oz had stayed on the show longer though as he was amazing, not just as willow's love interest. i love you forever oz

willow + tara (9/10)

i love them so so so so much my fav sapphic lovers. tara is my favorite buffyverse character besides buffy herself and seeing her character growth that came from willow's open support and friendship that blossomed into a romance was one of the greatest romance arcs on television i love them sm. willow's magic addiction is weird though in season 6 and weighs on their relationship a bit but in the end i love them

willow + kennedy (1/10) ew. i don't have to explain myself just ew.

willow + xander (1/10) no. no no no no no.

xander + cordelia (3/10) ew no, i will forever hate xander harris and pairing my girl cordy with him will forever make me mad AND THEN HE CHEATS ON HER???? vile.

xander + anya (6/10) i actually don't hate them sometimes, but it infuriated how often he undermined her when she was one of the most knowledgeable characters in the buffyverse on history with magic and etc. their little arc during once more with feeling made me like them a lot more though

spike + anya (5/10) i don't take it seriously as a ship but it was so funny when it did happen and i love it for that

cordelia + angel (8/10) SUCH A BETTER PAIRING FOR THESE CHARACTERS THEY SHOULD'VE BEEN THE ENDGAME!

giles + jenny (9/10) SO CUTE. THE TRAGEDY OMG I SOBBED SO HARD WHEN JENNY DIED I MISS YOU SM. the pining, the difference in technology vs physical information, etc. their dynamic was adorable and i'll always miss her sm

buffy + robin (4/10) very short lived and fizzled out so fast that it barely counts, i like robin alot though and wish he was given more to do as i found him interesting

drusilla + spike (7/10) i kinda love their devotion to each other even if it was extremely unhealthy, aesthetically also a very sexy ship and i love them for that

angel + darla (8/10) darla is one of the most underrated buffyverse characters and her arc in ats made her so so so fascinating that i am partially giving it such a high score because of my fascination with darla

fred + gunn (9/10) so cute!! i love them so much and it was so wholesome

fred + wesley (6/10) good amount of pining i guess? i don't have much to say about it but it was enjoyable enough

doyle + cordelia (7/10) so cute also!! i wish doyle had stayed around longer as i loved him lots

wesley + cordelia (3/10) ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew. SHE WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL DUDE IDC SO GROSS

wesley + lilah (7/10) in terms of functionality, not the best, BUT in terms of my fascination, very very high up omg

harmony + spike (4/10) also kinda a crack ship but it was funny while it lasted, harm deserved better though

(i think i covered them all but if there's more i'll update this)

[bumblelune]

no one does shuffle units like I do. I'm better. I am great. my truth. (lie. I am mediocre I am lying to you.) pls read I beg.

tsukasa mafuyu shiho ichika

pop rock band. they eat poprocks and shame mafumom as a hobby. tsukasa vents in lyrics cz he's banned from sending messages in their gc. shiho got annoyed by him. ichika muted him. mafuyu does not gaf.

the vbs(tm)

rui never got picked up by wxs cz emu was never at tsukasas audition like canon divs do. Toya never become a homosex. akito being bffs w haruka through an. they probably kissed once. and then many times. ans then akitos like holy sht what if we also kiss this purple dude who's socially inadept at my school he also does street performances so harukas like 👍 and then akito goes and kisses the purple stick and now they're all stuck together kissing each other making music. ugh.

akito gets random headaches n then he's like guys I'm gonna go get some ibu and then he comes back and is just popping like 10 ibu, 3 para and a monster right after.

harui are confused on how he's like alive and not yellow and dead.

"Omg kohane airi look it's an emo"

'wow ok kohane you should kidnap her into our group'

and she did. emu and airi are terrible people.

and they are supposed to perform for children? who allows this? they kidnapped kanade. wtf.

okay thanks for listening tune in next time for astranova, re:form and the miku and main voca designs 💥⁉️ using a tag for this. ez finds. Neri swap 🥺