#anping

[photoglobo]

Taiwan: The cherry blossoms of Fort Zeelandia

There’s an important historical place outside of Tainan, called Fort Zeelandia. It’s the place where Dutch people arrived and build their first trading outpost on Taiwan. Beside a museum and a tower with nice view, there’s also a beautiful garden with cherry trees. It’s just the right time of year to enjoy the cherry blossoms here.

[artphotographyofmen]

Luke Skywalker by Karina Martínez

[roots-system]

experienced a trauma recently? you may be entitled to: a new fucking guy in your head

[porcelainerose]

the doll doctor ♱ by 三無秋

[tyresdeg]

logan sargeant | thursday | zandvoort 2024

[littlest-bugz]

How it feels when you split a new alter and they know nothing about why they split

[strawberry-daiquiris]

what does adam norris need an arm like that for?

[thaltro]

this ask is a free pass to talk abt did/osdd as much as you want 👍

I love these free passes..thank you..please give me more 🫶🏽

Spending my pass on a rant about the online perception of DID/OSDD

One thing I find interesting is the concept of fake claiming and how that’s affected the community. In 2020 there was a large increase in mental health “awareness” online- mass vague posting of common symptoms and connecting it to larger disorders. This eventually lead to a lot of people misdiagnosing themselves with DID/OSDD. And Contrary to popular belief, I actually think most misdiagnosing was in good faith- younger teens for the first time connecting to disassociation, maladaptive day dreaming, emotional swings, PTSD, and derealization- and genuinely believing they had it. It’s more likely they had more common disorders like maybe Bpd, DDD, depression, psychosis- because there is a huge overlap in symptoms. (It’s also important to note it was also a huge awakening for actual systems too- because I’m definitely not saying everyone who had did/osdd in 2020 was misdiagnosed, in a lot of cases people were right!)

Buttttt

The internets reaction to this wasn’t with reeducation or kindness or even respectful criticism- it created a whole list of “faking signs”. I personally think the people who misdiagnosed themselves harmed the community much less then the people pushing for constant fakeclaiming. And now these arbitrary concepts plague actual systems pushing them into a deeper denial and opening them up to waves of unwanted harassment. Like ok, here’s some common misconceptions you’ll see (all the ones I’m listing are just bullshit and are contradicted with actual medical research)

-Systems can’t have fictives

-Systems can’t unmask

-Systems can’t have littles

-Systems can’t have factives

-Systems can’t have internal relationships

-Systems can’t have high amnesia

-Systems can’t have rapid switches

-Systems can’t have faceclaims or go by different genders/sexualities

ALL OF THIS IS BULLSHIT! None of these actually are backed up with medical research! And the worst part is I see groups of people just harass normal systems who show these normal symptoms and constantly fakeclaim them. I see cringe compilations, r/fake disorder cringe, tik toks, and video essays just spewing this nonsensical shit and it genuinely hurts. (It’s SO ANNOYING when they say shit like “people who do this hurt actual systems” YOUR HURTING ACTUAL SYSTEMS SHUT UP 😭) but Yes I do think there are people out their who do fake this disorder and use it to hurt and manipulate people. But I don’t think that’s the majority of misdiagnosed people. Even if someone was wrong I think it’s safer to just ignore them then to spread misinformation about DID/OSDD and encourage the possible harm onto genuine systems. (Also being wrong and admitting you are wrong is fine)

But yeah I’ll end my rant by saying If you support this weird online fakeclaiming witch hunts then I don’t want to associate with you. And to the self diagnosed systems or suspecting systems, it’s incredibly hard being in that position- harassment is almost guaranteed online and that sucks. Self diagnosis is valid especially if you can’t afford DID specialists- however with that statement If you do self diagnosis its necessary to do research. Don’t look at plural pedia or random websites- I recommend reading the DSM and The haunted self (it explains the fundamentals of structural dissociation)

PDF for the actual book ^^ (it’s also good for self diagnosed systems because it can help you weed out any other possible disorder overlap with BPD and PTSD)

But yeah 🙁 sorry for the rant I’m just really frustrated with the current climate of the internet especially for systems.

[leonardalphachurch]

(I've been re-watching certain episodes, and that one part in the Head Cannon finally hit different, because like- that's not the usual "inner thought" Church we see, like when he tried to get Sarge to give him money for the afterlife or went into Caboose's head, he's definitely like- THE Alpha, not "I'm just a guy who thinks he's a ghost haunting a robot body" Church. the way he talks about "I've been running this mess all by myself for years" YEAH. UH. he HAS been running this mess all by himself for years, because all the Fragments got taken away! and the way he's kinda like, tired with everything? it reminded me when Tex tried to Save Alpha without his memories. so like- Church has Alpha IN THERE, but probably doesn't notice half the time because Church's thoughts are usually screaming so loud, and Alpha doesn't even "remember" he's the Alpha. he's got double amnesia. man, Omega might've actually helped in there. he was even all excited like- :Nothing can stop us now, Church!". sorry for all that, but DANG)

ruby you don’t understand. we had the theory that “end of season 10 alpha” and “entirety of bgc church” were two separate entities long before head cannon came out. do you know how unbelievably validating it was to watch it. we literally theorized/headcanoned that alphas mindscape would be a facility in the snowy mountains. okay. obviously not exactly matching how the map looks but can you imagine the pop off.

inner “church” acted exactly like end of season 10 alpha!!! he was tired! hes been running this mess all by himself for years!! he knows it’s a mess!!! church doesn’t know it’s a mess! the mindscape versions of the characters are who they think of themselves as. and like sure you can make the argument that church really thinks of himself as a worn down and apathetic man who doesn’t want to do this shit anymore. OR we can look at the way bgc church actually acts and that he is incredibly motivated and engaged and that it would be kind of weird for him to see himself as not caring about what happens with omalley when he’s actively fighting him.

hey, isn’t it strange that church can externally feel nothing when omalley enters him even though he’s internally engaging with omalley the same way everyone else was? it’s almost seems as if his internal and external self are completely separated and unable to communicate with each other! i wonder if there’s a word for that…. maybe a dissociative disorder………. maybe one that’s known to be covert that we already know that church has but seemed to be absent for the entirety of bgc…………… wouldn’t that be wild.

[the-label-sanctuary]

・₊✧𝘈 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘺｡｡｡ -`♡´-

♡ATTENTIVE PERSON♡

✧An Attentive Person (ANP) is a Special Person attachment experienced by those with Hicistronic Personality Disorder  (HPD). An ANP is someone the person with HPD (pwHPD) can always rely on for supply. While their attention isn’t superior to others like an Attention Persons, the pwHPD can consistently and reliably obtain supply from this person. For example, a very supportive and loving friend that hypes you up every day could potentially be an ANP.✧

For a full list of Special Person terms, I made this doc for a comprehensible list. If you'd like to use my PD flags as emojis, I made this discord server with them as heart emojis! (Originally made to react to my SPs messages)

DISCLAIMER: All of these terms already have existed in the community before I posted them. If you have genuine questions or concerns, feel free to reach out and I will try to work with you! These terms are meant to be inclusive of ALL experiences I have heard of or experienced myself, so I have no issue adding things if necessary. These posts are meant to be short and sweet descriptions, not full deep delves on what each means! Feel free to make your own deep dives posts about your own experiences with these and @ me, I’ll definitely repost as long as they’re done in a respectful manner.

[bluepurpleviolatte]

How structural dissociation could theoretically play a role in narcissistic personality disorder (NPD)

1. The Role of the ANP in NPD

In individuals with narcissistic personality disorder, the ANP could develop into a highly defensive, cold, and delusional part of the personality that is designed to:

Protect against emotional vulnerability: The ANP is tasked with shielding the individual from the deep shame, insecurity, and emotional pain that the EP holds.

Maintain functionality: Like in all cases of structural dissociation, the ANP must keep the individual functioning in daily life. However, in NPD, the ANP achieves this by constructing a grandiose and inflated self-image as a defense mechanism.

This grandiose facade includes:

Unrealistic self-importance: The ANP inflates the individual's sense of worth and competence to avoid feeling the deep inadequacy and shame stored in the EP.

Lack of empathy: To maintain emotional invulnerability, the ANP closes off access to empathy, as connecting emotionally with others would risk exposing the painful vulnerability of the EP.

2. The Role of the EP in NPD

The EP in narcissistic personality disorder might remain:

Highly vulnerable: The EP holds the core wounds, including feelings of deep shame, inadequacy, and sensitivity to criticism.

Fragile and reactive: While the ANP keeps the EP suppressed most of the time, triggers (e.g., criticism or rejection) can momentarily activate the EP. When this happens, the EP's vulnerability emerges as overwhelming feelings of shame, self-doubt, or humiliation.

3. The ANP-EP Dynamic in NPD

In NPD, the relationship between the ANP and EP becomes rigid and dysfunctional:

The ANP protects the EP excessively: The ANP works overtime to suppress the EP, avoiding any acknowledgment of vulnerability or emotional pain. This suppression reinforces the narcissistic delusion, as the ANP constructs a reality that denies the existence of the EP’s pain.

Grandiosity as a shield: The ANP adopts a grandiose facade to protect the EP from being exposed or reactivated. By convincing itself and others of its superiority, the ANP avoids situations that might trigger the EP’s shame or feelings of inadequacy.

Maladaptive strategies: The ANP engages in manipulation (e.g., gaslighting, blaming others, or projecting flaws onto them) to maintain control and deflect attention away from the EP’s vulnerabilities.

4. How This Creates the Perceived "Twisted Reality"

The behaviors and perceptions we associate with narcissistic personality disorder can be understood as the ANP’s desperate attempts to maintain control and suppress the EP:

Delusion of self-importance: The ANP constructs an exaggerated sense of superiority to deny the shame and inadequacy stored in the EP. This creates a distorted self-perception.

Gaslighting and manipulation: By controlling others’ perceptions of reality, the ANP further shields the EP from potential exposure or criticism.

Emotional detachment: Empathy is suppressed because connecting with others emotionally might risk touching the EP’s vulnerability.

Fragility under criticism: Despite the facade of confidence, the ANP can’t fully suppress the EP’s sensitivity to criticism. When triggered, the EP’s vulnerability can emerge in the form of rage, defensiveness, or emotional breakdowns.

5. Origins in Early Emotional Trauma

NPD often develops as a result of childhood experiences, such as:

Emotional neglect or abuse: A child may have grown up in an environment where their emotional needs were ignored or ridiculed, leading to the suppression of vulnerability (EP) and the development of a defensive, grandiose ANP.

Conditional love: If a child’s worth was tied to performance or appearance rather than their intrinsic value, the ANP might adopt perfectionism or superiority as a way to avoid the pain stored in the EP.

Shame and humiliation: Chronic exposure to shame or humiliation may result in the EP being overwhelmed with feelings of inadequacy, which the ANP then works hard to deny and suppress.

6. Summary of the ANP-EP Dynamics in NPD

In summary:

ANP in NPD: Highly developed, cold, and delusional, with a grandiose and manipulative facade to protect against emotional vulnerability.

EP in NPD: Stores the core of unresolved pain, shame, and vulnerability, remaining sensitive to criticism and rejection.

Dysfunctional interaction: The ANP suppresses the EP excessively, leading to a distorted perception of self and reality.

This perspective doesn’t negate the harm caused by narcissistic behaviors but offers a way to understand the inner psychological dynamics behind them.

[porcelainerose]

♱ by 三無秋

[tyresdeg]

logan sargeant | sunday | zandvoort 2024

[redacted-coiner]

Would you consider doing a pixel for neglect holder flag? One from pluralpedia ?

Grief Holder , Neglect Holder , Mortician

ANP , Synesthesia Holder , Emotion Neutralizer

NPD Holder , Facade , Perinaut

DNI is listed within my pinned post. Please go read it before interacting with any part of my content. Ask to tag.

More Seen Here!

[strawberry-daiquiris]

it’s just me and my binoculars against the world 🫶

[ididnineeleven]

have i posted this yet. this is my space odyssey oc doctor theseus, a canadian astrobiologist hired on a mars colony mission to study potential martian bacteria ... he is based off my best friend forever

drawn on phone with finger on ibispaint