#anyway. yeah. im fine im normal

[jakowskis]

sloppy gay ramble about why i ship owento lets go

(this was meant to be a server ramble but it got too big for discord so here’s a ginormous messily formatted semi stream-of-consciousness type essay on why i ship owen x ianto and what’s compelling about it to me. starts out kinda babbly n then i got serious abt it n then i got babbly again so sorry for the tone switch fhsdjkfd. i do not know if this is cohesive, let alone persuasive, i'm not trying to sell you the ship so much as im yapping incoherently about the Themes n Motifs that drive me mad. but yeah. also this is purely based on the first two seasons of the show, nothing else. im not normal about these guys btw im Deranged. anyway here.)

for starters, background. i must explain what first roped me into this pairing. the answer? season 1 episode 12. singlehandedly. and then i felt Haunted for a while, and then i read some fic and something clicked in my head and it's been my torchwood otp since. im very consistently an enemies/rivals to lovers enjoyer so at first i was just like 'heh nice i love toxic yaoi' but then they decided not to leave me alone. and a lot of it's bc of the Themes 🫵 do not underestimate my ability to overthink and overcomplicate a barely-there relationship whose connotations are entirely subtextual

see, owen and ianto are mirrors in like ten ways, and where they're not mirrors, they’re foils. on the mirror end, their backstories are jarringly similar (abusive parental figure; rebellious phase as a youth (punk vs goth); losing their fiancée/serious girlfriend as a young adult to an alien threat). their relationships with jack are adjacent (emotionally unavailable authority figure they look to for approval; owen as jack's second in command versus ianto as his right hand man). most interestingly, imo, is their personalities. at their core, theyre not entirely different. owen in his backstory? he's a lot like ianto. faithful, loyal, quiet, gentle. they're not markedly different in who they are deep down, they just have extremely different coping mechanisms that make them look like opposites. ianto dissociates + turns things inward - owen self-destructs AND lashes out. owen's like a ianto that hardened and got mean - ianto's like an owen who still values being quiet and dutiful and not making trouble. (basically, history + personality-wise they’re mirrors, coping mechanism + temperament-wise, they’re foils. two sides of the same coinnnnn)

they both recognize this, although possibly not consciously - and it bothers them. ianto dislikes + feels threatened by / wary of owen's impulsivity and aggression (partly bc he fears he himself is like that deep down, and he isnt willing to access that part of himself. we see a handful of times that ianto does in fact have repressed anger and its SCARY. and i wouldnt doubt hes intimidated by that part of himself, given his control issues. esp considering his plot in adam, if you wanna read it that way). meanwhile owen dislikes ianto for what he perceives as subservience + weakness (partly bc those are things he sees in himself and HATES. a lot of owen's character is his struggles w his own nature + feeling a need to compensate for perceived deficiencies). and they also look down on each other for these qualities, and, i think, bolster themselves a little bit by comparing themselves to the other. we know owen does this (“it’s like you finally won.” “i didn’t know we were in competition.”), but considering ianto’s preoccupation with competency, i don’t doubt he also feels a little bit better about himself when owen fucks things up by acting rashly.

so ianto's like a version of owen that he tried to bury entirely and move on from when katie died, and owen's reminiscent of what ianto's afraid he's capable of becoming. and they both project these things onto each other - owen more outwardly, in the way he feels the need to attack ianto in both of their significant one-on-one scenes. in ianto we see it more as avoidance + slight disgust. in their lighter scenes ('lets all have sex', and the tin tin discussion) we see owen trying to be companionable (...can u call the sleeper scene that fhsdjkf) and ianto having none of it. funny enough, i think owen likes ianto more than ianto likes owen, at least by s2. liking aside, though, ianto does care for him. but another thing i like abt owento is owen's a litttttle bit fixated on ianto for some reason (i think it could be interpreted ten different ways, but him repeatedly bringing up ianto & jack's relationship is wiiiild to me) - n then ianto doesn't think abt owen much at all, he's just sort of there. it's fucking funny. i like a darker take on owento, as u can probs tell, but also they can be hilarious if you want them to be. two guys who can't stand each other and should kiss about it is always good. but yeah, as they exist in canon, as of s2, they're just sort of... comfortably colleagues, albeit maybe still a bit combative.

but i’m eternally caught up in what episode 12 teased me with. (and i knowww ep12 was specific desperate circumstances, that's not their norm, but what's presented when they're both at that point is soo compelling to me. i like characters at their worst.) see, episode 12 is when we really see that half-mirrors half-foils thing come to a head. owen’s spiraling because he just lost diane. he feels weak, he feels powerless. he’s essentially doing what ianto did in episode 4, putting love first, and you can tell owen was kind of disgusted with + felt betrayed by ianto in that ep, so he’s also being a hypocrite and breaking his own standards for how a torchwood agent ought to act. (not to mention i think owen deeply resents his own emotionality, but that’s another topic.) and during that spiral, ofc, he gets mean and frantic, in typical owen fashion. then we have ianto. despite the threat of losing jack, ianto does his best to stay level headed and focus on what their job is, rather than personal feelings - something owen usually values.

so there’s this moment where their traits are both blurring a bit, where roles are being swapped but without straying from the heart of each character, where the mirrors are RLLY reflecting each other (infinity mirror? on and on and on...). owen’s simultaneously being self-destructive and rash, but also vulnerable and love-lorn, which is something he looks down on ianto for in regards to lisa and then jack (and his verbal attack on ianto is majorly projection, too. ‘part time shag’ is especially notable when 1) him and gwen’s affair literally broke off last episode. owen was HER part time shag, and 2) him and diane were meant to be casual too and owen caught feelings - same as ianto with jack. major projection lawl. and we see owen do this multiple times, it’s a trait of his. another notable instance is him telling tosh “you want someone as broken and screwed up as you”, lmao).

and ianto’s being pushed to his limit, too; he’s trying to hold firm and stick to his values about the rules, but it’s the most hardened and merciless we ever see him. when you’re carefully watching, there’s a Brutality in him in a few key moments when he’s pointing that gun at owen and it’s SO critical to my understanding of + enjoyment of the character. i just find ianto’s inner darkness reallyyy compelling haha. my other fav ianto moment is “pray they survive” in meat. there’s something SCARY to him that the show doesn’t often bring out, and it’s what i find most intriguing about him. (both moments are also some of my fav bits of acting from gareth, too. i also think burn’s a much better scene partner for him than barrowman, there’s just something about the way they play off each other in ep12, man. i am… not always impressed by gareth’s acting, but in those scenes i think he’s brilliant.) 

so ep12 introduces the things that my concept of owento heavily revolves around - and then you expand upon it. see, the ship is almost entirely hypothetical. what they Could be - what they have the potential to be. that’s not everyone's thing, especially in a fandom with canon gay relationships, but i loveee it, and i love that there’s tons of freedom in it. it’s also fun as hell + very stimulating as a fanfic writer. other writers have done a lot too, there’s been many fantastic interpretations over the years - there’s a fair amount of rlly rlly good owento fic, particularly by one author back in 2007 who wrote t o n s of amazing stuff + rlly established a great dynamic that most other people have kind of followed (including me). my favorite take on owento (and, imo, the best, and the most plausible, one) is that they hooked up between s1 n s2, while jack was gone. i think its brilliant, i think there's a LOT of rlly insane connotations there + in a show like tw its not far-fetched, like i could see it happening. it's an extension of things we see in canon - for starters, when they’re desperate, they end up in bed with another member of the team. and then the way owen’s always in jack's shadow… gwen wanted jack from the start but she turned to owen instead bc he was there. the idea of that happening again, with a ianto who wants jack but can't have him… owen's consistent trend of being someone's mistake, of being someone’s second choice. his consistent tendency to be there when someone hits rock bottom to offer them a sexual reprieve. because he’s always down there himself, and misery loves company. he doesn’t like being alone in it. (torchwood and its persistent loneliness, btw.) and then there’s the recurrent theme of the power struggle between jack and owen - owen often wants to get one over on jack, which occasionally entails trying to covet the things jack has/wants… rubbing his grubby little hands all over jack’s toys. or maybe that’s just the only way he knows how to establish some claim over torchwood - sleeping with half the members. why not add another? why not give jack the finger a third time? i love drama 🕺

and on ianto’s end… for starters, owen’s a lot like jack in certain ways. a lot of it seems to be a front he puts on (and i wont get into the intriguing implications of owen choosing to or perhaps subconsciously emulating jack in certain respects when he started fresh at torchwood) - if ianto’s kind of like owen was, jack’s kind of like what he’s trying to be, he just doesn’t pull it off as well. not quite as good at being superficially charming. pulls it off in his own way, though. point is, despite the fact that canon implies ianto has zero interest in owen, some of the things he’s intrigued by with jack are in fact present in owen. the inaccessibility, the compensatory arrogance, the brooding, the intensity. this is arguably further present in gwen’s attraction to the both of them. there’s some surface level similarities that canon even seems to reflect on a few times (esp in s2). additionally, i don’t tend to think owen was in charge while jack was gone (i think he stepped back and let gwen do it, but maybe took charge during field missions, as implied by kkbb), but it’s an interesting angle in some owento fics, ianto gravitating towards whoever’s the boss. more than that, though, after losing lisa AND jack, he’d probably end up looking for someone else to preoccupy himself with, against his better judgement. a trait owen and him have in common, it just manifests in different ways. (and, finally, i think he'd also be compelled by the differences between jack and owen. owen's a complicated guy, but i think ianto understands him well enough. there's not really a mystery, he doesn't have to guess with him. owen straight-forward and a bit of an open book, and i think ianto might find that a relief.)

the other thing that compels me, and that i think would compel ianto, is that, oddly enough, owen's someone ianto ends up having power over pretty easily (although not without a fight). this is a sharp contrast to jack, where jack's always the dominating force (i dont mean that perversely, i mean, like, he's all-consuming), and ianto's always kind of at his mercy. a really interesting part of episode 12 is that neither of them, owen or ianto, really win, and yet they both score a victory over the other in different ways, too. owen successfully opens the rift; but ianto prevents him from doing so for quite a while, and does in fact shoot him over it. owen may have succeeded, but ianto established physical dominance by putting a bullet in him. which, cough. that in itself. and not to get additionally horny with it cuz thats not what this is about, but there’s this other really interesting bit in the episode that haunts me, as well: when ianto tells owen to go home, owen sneers at him and refuses, and then ianto stares him down - and owen caves. he’s still sneering, but he caves without fuss. that right there… is the crux of what i find so enthralling. owen, for all his rebelliousness + pride, does briefly bend to ianto’s will. but he does it in such an almost back-handed way, he twists it, almost like ‘you forced my hand, happy now?’ even though… ianto didn’t try hard in that moment to coerce him. owen gave in on his own free will, but had to feel like he’d been made to, and tried to twist it to take some of the ‘satisfaction’ away from ianto (even though it’s not about winning and losing to ianto, at least consciously)… the mind games u guys!!!

and on the flip side, the way ianto was able to come out on top (NO EUPHEMISM INTENDED I PROMMYYYY) simply by standing firm. not raising his voice, not being physically aggressive. he stood there and looked at him. thats insaneeeee. and that's a moment of control for him that he doesn't get in his onscreen relationship with jack, or in his career at torchwood. and we see it for just one moment the only time owen & ianto interact in an substantial way. there's so many crazyyy things that could come out of those two falling into something messy, and i think it's really interesting that the power dynamic that's implied by canon puts ianto in a position of power we don't get to see him in in his canon relationship with jack. i want to see more of a ianto who's not just an accessory to jack, who stands on his own two feet, and that ep is honestly the only time in all twenty-six s1 and s2 eps where that happens. he's not only owen's equal in that ep, he fights for control and manages to command things. that? is a ianto i'm endlessly intrigued by. and then there's the fact that this is all right after owen's gay little fight club episode, where we learn that owen's a guy who lovessss mixing homoeroticism with violence. not only that, the power plays and mind games mark and owen play with each other in ep 11 - ep 12 is a direct continuation of that, between ianto and owen. and thats SOOO sexy to me fhdsfjkds.

so we have something angry and visceral and raw - which isn't everyone's cup of tea but its my LIFEBLOOD. they bring out the worst in each other, the aspects of themselves that they dislike. and personally? im always compelled by ships that have that dynamic - but then they both get a bit Addicted to it. i LOVE the thematic theme of surrendering to the worst parts of yourself, and of being drawn in by the ugly parts of someone else. and i think there’d be smth rlly interesting in the form of them each realizing the other’s their mirror, as well. something almost self-punishing, potentially. lil bit psychosexual. i like the thought of owen recognizing that ianto’s more than meets the eye, recognizing that he’s got a sadism to him - i think he could be compelled to draw that out, because that’s already something we see with owen (most explicitly during the whole gwen affair). owen’s someone who wants to find someone as fucked up and lost as he is. we see this with gwen and diane - and we can deduce that's what drew him to suzie. but it should also be noted those relationships were all with women - in the show, as previously mentioned above, owen’s attraction to men is always associated with aggression, with violence. a lot to be said about that, and i have a wip essay on owen’s sexuality in my drafts, but the point is owen’s queerness exists in anger and in power struggles with other men - which makes it obvious to me, given how they're presented in ep12, that him and ianto’s relationship could very, very easily trip over the line into being something More. owen’s turned on by aggression, he’s canonically attracted to ianto - i really dont think it’d take much for him to make a move. particularly if jack were gone. and i could very easily see him ending up looking at ianto and thinking ‘hm. there's something fucked up about him. i bet i can make him worse’. 

and ianto… see, this is where it gets fun, and also where my personal interpretation deviates from most owento writers, because a lot of people write this pairing as very brutal; the ianto in owento fics is usually much harsher than any ianto i’ve seen elsewhere. it’s rarely ooc, bc we see that ianto in the show, just not often, and it’s one of his most interesting forms n i’m fond of him. that being said - i’m personally intrigued by the idea of ianto figuring owen out and realizing that aggression and casual sex isn’t what he really wants after all. owen’s soft, deep down, and there’s a need to be understood and cared for. that’s… kind of ianto’s specialty. and there’s an angle of power there, too. maintaining control in a way that simply being rough could never sufficiently achieve. because i dont tend to ship enemies-to-lovers in a way where the characters aren’t being self-serving and conniving. i like when two characters are exploiting each other and fucking themselves up in the process. that’s my shit. i especially like when it eventually becomes something that almost looks like a really bastardized version of love. all in all i think they just have the potential to bring some crazyyyy shit out of each other

um. theres a lot more i could say but this is already really long and i ran out of steam. basically i think they should have hatesex but then get obsessed with each other and wage psychological warfare on each other👍

[starry-bi-sky]

don't you want to be a cult leader? - danyal al ghul au

this is mostly a joke post but i thought it was funny and had to share so--

his first mistake was, obviously, inheriting his father's inability to see an injustice and stand still. -- actually, danyal's first mistake was his lair being so big. a mountainous island with a large temple in the center resembling his old home in Nanda Parbat? With sprawling foliage and rivers and streams and waterfalls galore? What was he going to do with all that space? Let it go to waste? He had plants there! Native trees of the ghost zone growing from the soil! He couldn't let it all be left unchecked!

So naturally after helping a fellow teenage assassin ghost -- who he later learns is named Akihiko, -- from Walker of all people, he sent them over to hang low at his lair until it was safe enough for them to wander around the Zone. Walker couldn't get through Danyal's astrofield if his life depended on it, and trust him -- he's tried. Danny was clearing out debris from his stupid transport vans for weeks.

Honestly it wasn't so bad, he and Aki really quickly became fast friends and Danny loves having a sparring partner close to his level again -- he hasn't had this much fun fighting since he left the League. Aki was very dedicated and levelheaded, the both of them clicked really well because of it.

Nonono, the real trouble began after Danyal met some long-passed League members and allowed them to come join his island as well. Apparently they had made a few enemies of the zone, and maybe Danyal still felt some loyalty to the League. He couldn't just let them be left to rot. Their zealotry could be overlooked so long as they kept it contained and helped him take care of his island.

And it.. snowballs from there? He meets a teen squire aptly calling himself Ambroise -- whether that was his living name or not is yet to be seen -- who died during feudal france, who is just about as dramatic and passionate as every french stereotype makes them out to be. He calls Danyal "my moon and great muse" -- which is both flattering and little uncomfortable, but Danyal's grown up in the League as the Grandson of the Demon Head, he is used to mild worship. he passes it off as nothing more, nothing less. -- and while his energy is overwhelming on the worst of days, he helps Danny draw out of his shell more in ways that Sam and Tucker still struggle with.

Him and Aki butt heads a lot, but the two seem to hold the other in at least some positive regard, so Danny doesn't worry too much about them fighting while he's gone. It only becomes a mild issue when Aki also begins calling Danny "my moon". It's a little sweet, so Danyal brushes it off.

Then he takes in a troupe of ghosts some time after he defeats Pariah Dark and they begin calling him "great one" just as the yetis do in the far frozen. This is where he meets the twins -- a pair of sibling ghosts who call themselves Trixie and Missy (short for Trick and Mislead) -- who aren't quite as passionate as Ambroise but more energetic than Aki. Eventually they also start calling Danyal "my moon" and attach themselves to his hip, even within the living. They like to hide in his shadow and cause trouble for the rest of the students. He makes sure they don't hurt anyone.

He's pretty sure Aki is jealous, same with Ambroise, but he can't be too certain other than the fact that they become much more lingering (re: clingy) whenever he visits the island.. Something he's trying to do much more often these days due to the increasing amount of people living there now. Since when did he become so popular?

Then there's Pēnelópeia from the Greater Athens, who ran away from home and joined his Island after he ran into her while she was being chased by Skulker -- and he's pretty sure the reason was because of her chimeric appearance. Her strange eyes and mismatched wings and lion's tail and talons. She assimilates into his friend group very easily, she gets along well with Ambroise and Trixie and Danny usually finds the three of them climbing the trees to pluck the most fruit from the top. They can fly and he knows it, but they prefer to climb.

Then finally there's silent poet Akkara who comes from ancient mesopotamia, who gets along most with Aki -- which is no surprise there considering their similar personality dispositions. he watches Aki and Danyal fight each other and leaves comments on this or that that he notices. He writes Danyal poems on clay tablets and leaves them by his room.

They're one big mismatched group of outcasts, and Danny's got the other ghosts on his island to tend to, because they're living on his island and he wants to be hospitable even if he struggles with that. But he spends the most of his time with them.

Sam and Tucker are making fun of him. Tucker jokingly tells him 'careful Danny, at this rate you're gonna start a cult'. Danny really wishes he had taken that joke more seriously.

He just. keeps. collecting people. Wayward souls lost in the zone, looking for shelter or refuge from something or other -- whether that be another hostile ghost, or a past afterlife, or just a purpose. Danyal finds them, he takes them in, offers them a place on his island until they are ready to leave. Many seldom do. He's not complaining -- he has the space, and it feels like it's only ever growing.

His close friends, his "inner circle" as he's heard the others call them, keep insistently calling him "my moon". He starts calling them his stars, because then it only feels fair. They're his stars, this is his constellation. It becomes a thing; little star halos begin forming behind their heads, picking them out from the rest. He loves them so much, it's hard to place. Sam and Tucker are also his stars, but they reside in the living realm, they're his tie to Life. Meanwhile, his friends here know what it's like to be dead, and sometimes its nice to relate.

Those living on his island keep calling him "Great One" and he's beginning to notice zealotry in their care for his island. He really, deeply appreciates it. His close friends gain nicknames -- as his stars, it's only natural for him to pick them out from the cluster in the skies. Akihiko, his Sirius and bright star. Trix and Missy, Castor and Pollux, the twins and troublemakers. Ambroise, his zealous Antares and close friend. Penelopeia, chimeric and loyal Vega. And Akkara, his Arcturus and strength.

It's ridiculous how long it takes for him to notice; he is, of course, a deadly trained assassin. He is meant to be observant -- and normally he is! But somehow this becomes a blind spot. One that becomes too big to be dealt with by the time he realizes it.

He should've noticed when Aki, his Sirius, stood beside him one day while Danyal looked over his island and saw the sprawling spirits carrying on about their afterlife and bowing to him as they saw him, and said: "I looked down into the depths when I met you; I couldn't measure it." They aren't one for flowing prose, it took him so off guard he was silent for over a minute before he finally spoke.

Danyal should've recognized devotion for what it is, and yet he didn't. He should've recognized it when Antares began spouting praises about him, crowing about his radiance and resplendence to the heavens. He just brushed it off as Ambroise being Ambroise. He should've recognized it when Trix and Missy nearly broke Dash's leg after he knocked Danyal's books out of his hands, he excused it as them being protective. Of them coming from times where such violence may have been customary -- after all, that's what he used to be like. What he was still like, sometimes, when his emotions nearly got the better of him.

He should've noticed it when the people living on his island followed his word like gospel, looked at him like he hung the stars in the sky. When his friends gifted him a shawl with the moon phases delicately embroidered into it, with silver, shimmering thread and moving stars lovingly stitched into it. Their constellations seen clear as day in the dark fabric. When he found small shrines dedicated to him -- but they lacked any image of him beyond stones carved to look like moons, so he ignored it. When the religious imagery began popping up.

He really, really should've noticed it when a bunch of cultists accidentally summoned Antares, and Antares had turned to him when he arrived and called them heretics. But he was so centered on the fact that they had kidnapped one of his stars, that he hadn't paid much attention to what Ambroise had said.

Sages say that faith is blind, they should also say faith in you is even blinder.

It really only hits him one afternoon while he's sitting in Sam's room studying with Tucker, Missy and Trixie lounging at his feet, Aki sat on his right, Penelopeia braiding his hair, Ambroise draped against him, and Akkara lurking over him. Its one of the rare few times they're all in one room together.

It hits him like a bolt of lightning. He looks up from his textbook. "Oh Ancients," he says in no amounting shock. Everyone looks up to him.

"I've become my grandfather."

[xxplastic-cubexx]

top five worst people to be around when theyre experiencing road rage

[buckleyflower]

eddie living his life in texas while everyone in his social circle back in L.A. is bullying him into gayness what a time to be alive if only he knew!!!!!!

[fayrism]

untamed sketch. they make me SICK

ID in alt

[bookshelfpassageway]

i'm gonna be the one insufferable bastard on this earth that liked everhood 2, huh

[aroaceleovaldez]

finally finished my project of collecting voiceclaims that are as close as i can find for my hcs of the main HoO cast - just for funsies so it's not as perfect as I'd like but whatever, it was a neat exploration and exercise of me trying to think of literally any franchise for voice actors.

Leo got two cause I had trouble of finding good clips for the voiceclaim that's closers to my hcs for him (the second half of his section). Also got to play the fun game of digging through my art for decent doodles of each character.

Also fun fact, I am almost completely unfamiliar with 3 franchises in this video and was just digging for voice clips on youtube. Try to guess which ones.

[mr-aftons-rotting-pussy]

like obv im not a fan of Strictly Businessman William that the fandom loves for some fucking reason *coughs in a particular direction* but its like you could still do smth fun with this generao concept i feel and yet yall still dont.............. hear me out✋️ heres how the afton!businessheads and the afton!theaterboyheads can still win ,,,,

[the-meme-monarch]

huh sorry for disappearing for like a day and a half. a weird guy appeared

[icharchivist]

sometimes algorythms put da4 positive posts in front of me and i kinda let it go because i'm like, good for you for thinking it was nice! have fun!

but then somehow they'll say something positive about something that i think is absolutely dogshit and it'll be my fucking last straw

i just blocked someone because they said the trick ending was brilliant and Solas admitting he was wrong and outmatched was so satisfying. Like yeah, like we say in France, i didn't come here to suffer okay.

[the-kipsabian]

[djarinova]

me when everyone i know seems to have closer friendships than i do

[deathbysports]

i hate to say it... but i was not a fan of this decentralized format at all.

[s-ccaam-era-crepe]

wough weird sad feelings about my dad who could have expected that

[wickmitz]

lo and behold, here’s my sexuality list for some of the lackadaisy characters! i am well aware most of these aren’t canon and that i’m being a little ‘too fruity’ with it, though that’s alright! these are just my opinions and, frankly, i don’t want nor need them to be canon in any way -- they are just aspects added to the characters mostly for my enjoyment. some of these are subjected to change ( due to a variety of reasons ) and some of these i may consider ‘canon’ in the sense that i read the characters with these headcanons in mind. i could also write an essay on some of the hcs listed here, but for the sake of simplicity i kept them as brief as i could … but without further ado, lets get on with it! :

rocky : he’s rather confusing, sexuality wise. tentatively would say he’s bisexual to some degree given how little someone’s gender matters to him, and that he also falls under the asexual umbrella ; being either demisexual or greysexual perhaps! he mostly just yearns to be loved and to serve as an invaluable object in someone’s life, taking his devotion to the extremes even if it’s unasked of him to do so. i don’t think he actually thinks about romance and any of his romantic feelings for people are more so vague and metaphorical … while he wouldn’t turn down a relationship, especially with someone he ‘desires’, i don’t necessarily think that’s his goal either. rocky is too easily caught up in outside factors to function normally in a traditional romantic sense, and any such activities that come with dating is the furthest thing from his mind. he likes being someone’s number one, their one and only, the most important force in their life … but if he can achieve that without romance, then he’ll be fine with that too. rocky will die for his crush ten times over but is rather okay with never getting to kiss even their hand. he’s an enigma!

freckle : transgirl and she’s too nervous to figure out the rest of her identity as it stands, though would probably be best described as demisexual. might have a phase where she adopts the lesbian label due to a preference for women only to find out she’s still attracted to men … swears off labels after this due to embarrassment! overall, freckle’s whole thing is about exploring her gender identity more than anything else ; finding a skin that’s actually comfortable for her to wear and easing some of that inner turmoil and anger inside of her. wiggling into something that feels freeing rather than being eternally tied down by her mother’s intense catholic views. ivy helps freckle out a ton too, making for a great mentor when it comes to embracing femininity and enjoying the girlish birthright of crushing on stupid boys, and speaking of ivy …

ivy : heteroflexible plain and simple! is primarily interested in men while showing little to no attraction towards girls, and wouldn’t have ever dated one had it not been for freckle transitioning. she staunchly refused to break up with freckle after, and decided ( rather brazenly ) that she’s got a girlfriend now and that’s really cool actually!! plus she now has a loophole to present to viktor so he doesn’t try to kill her paramor. love wins <3

viktor : straight. he is not sexually nor romantically into men, sadly. has mostly sworn off love in general though, so he doesn’t think about this stuff as it stands ; and he’s kinda behind on all these terms anyway. but despite this, he wouldn’t be opposed to being life partners ( or being in a qpr ) with a man if things fell that way. see my mini essay on vikdecai for additional info on that!

mordecai : transman, homoromantic(?), and asexual … mordecai keeps all of this under lock and key, with the only people knowing about his trans identity being atlas, mitzi, and viktor ( who all found out through various means ) -- though serafine and nico also heavily suspect it themselves. he’s more oblivious to his homoromantic inclinations though, as well as his asexuality to an extent. will typically dismiss his repulsion towards touch as something else he’s just being ‘neurotic’ about, rather than holding any real significance. the reason for the question mark near homoromantic is simply due to the fact i could see mordecai still being interested in women! so i sort of flip between homosexual labels and demiromantic labels for him. but he definitely, and without a doubt, has a heavy male preference regardless!

mitzi : straight and polyamorous … kind of. she’s experimented with women before ( on the road, most notably ) and has no qualms about being with them sexually or doing minor romantic acts with them either. she’s just never been particularly attached to them the way she is with men, hence her more serious relationships being exclusively with the opposite gender. still, she’s more casual and loose with her sexuality than most are, and is more than willing to be with a girl if it suits her needs or makes her happy. might become bisexual down the line after meeting women that fit her type, or she might always be straight with a few ‘exceptions’ … being kind of heteroflexible in that regard! and as for her polyamory, while she enjoys that lifestyle and could commit to it again, she much prefers monogamy now, usually. see my mitzi’s type post for more info on all of that!

zib : oh boy. i don’t think zib cares for labels and prefers being an unlabeled mess of a thing ( calling himself and resonating with ‘queer’ is as far as he’ll probably ever go ) but to make this simple, he’s sort of a … bisexual, genderqueer, demiromantic, and polyamorous cocktail. and even those labels are almost too restricting for zib, who’s rather unashamed and free where it concerns existing as his disastrous self. he likes men, he likes women, he likes people who aren’t men or women, he likes people who are both … he’s a man, and sometimes a woman, or at the very least enjoys dressing like a woman … he likes casual and multiple partners … he struggles with more traditional romantic commitment but wants it nonetheless … etc, etc. he’s sort of everywhere! views life through a simplistic lense of ‘if i like it, then i like it’ and doesn’t bother with it further.

wick : a man who is straight by design and default, since his type is as standard as it can get … aka being primarily interested in curvy women who are extremely feminine. he still likes all manner of women though! but he’s not really into men really, even if he’s extremely open minded about lgbtq+ overall and almost wishes he could have a queer experience of some kind. if only because everyone around him thinks he’s gay or has assumed it at some point in time. though there is some wiggle room despite this! wick could become romantically attracted to a man, i think, if certain things aligned -- but will never be attracted to them in a standard sexual manner. it’s too complicated for me to thoroughly explain here ( and @churchwick is more qualified to talk about this than me anyway, as the wick expert ) yet i do think wick could fancy himself an exception or two. he’d be rather awkward about the whole thing though </3

serafine : lesbian who barely ever bothers with men and isn’t shy about showing off her lady-type preference. she also has some gender stuff going on, occasionally embracing he/him pronouns alongside her feminine ones whenever she so pleases. operates on very hedonistic grounds too, constantly adorning herself with pretty girls until her arms are full and keeping her furniture warm, since she sleeps better that way if nico is unavailable. enjoys taking in girls who are ‘blind’ and need to be shown the truth … likes offering them a better life within her cult and by her side. although it’s worth noting that serafine is rather casual with her conquests and hardly ever takes on a permanent and more personal ‘lover’, but she’s semi open to the idea of it regardless. she is merely going through life and enjoying wherever it leads her, after all.

nico : i’ll be honest, i have no clue! i do not think about nico enough to have an opinion on his orientation, but it felt wrong to seperate the savoy siblings, so here he is anyway. he’s certainly cisgender and is extremely comfortable with being a man. and, like his sister, he’s more prone to casual arrangements rather than actual dating. i could see him being pansexual perhaps! i don’t think he cares for gender much, and will go for anyone who is ‘hot’ enough or ‘interesting’ enough if that makes sense. he’s a little shallow about it! but again, those are just my rather quick thoughts on the matter. i seriously need to think more about nico sometime, whoops.

lacy : extremely repressed bisexual! she is rather inexperienced with dating in general, having been strictly study focused in school and now that she finds herself as wick’s secretary, she still has little room left for a love life. her entire schedule is mostly just wick, wick, wick, and wick … keeping sable stone & quarry afloat business wise while also tending to her employer’s personal health and safety as well. such a busy life ( on top of tennis and the occasional lunch with friends ) has her rather closed off to meeting men or being courted by them, with her crush on wick being no help in this regard either! she is rather content with his company and has made little effort to seek out new men to converse with, or engage with women in a flirtatious manner. but eventually she’ll have a rather violent bisexual awakening that sends her reeling and leaves her confused, a little caught up in the almost teenage throes of envy, admiration, and hate towards the women she’s attracted to. over time she’ll get over herself and her perpetually reserved demeanor enough to explore this side of her -- though it will come with many bumps along the road and won’t be as seamless of a transition for her as it would be for some people.

church : homosexual through and through. he’s unmarried and is taking great advantage of the pansy craze happening underground. engages in more casual relationships with the same rotation of men due to a.) not caring for romance and b.) also being keenly aware of the fact that there are plenty of people out there who would use this to ruin him, blackmail him, or worse. so to say he’s extremely careful and secretive about it all is almost an understatement. hasn’t ever required a beard due to his disdainfully bored personality … but not having a wife to feign care towards leaves him with ample room to explore and carry himself as he pleases behind closed doors. if anyone knows the ins and outs of some queer scenes in st. louis, it’s him, surprisingly. and he’s rather tight lipped about the whole thing.

atlas : like the man himself, nobody knows, not even me! he definitely loved mitzi, though whether or not he was equally into men is a mystery.

so tada! those were my very brief and incoherent notes on the lackadaisy crew and what’s going on with them, sexuality and gender wise! i originally planned to discuss other characters here as well, like asa, the arbogasts, ruby, virgil, etc … basically anyone else i could think of, or whoever else that was listed on the lackadaisy characters page that i hadn’t covered yet. although to be frank, i don’t have many thoughts on those characters where it concerns their orientations! so i left them alone for now. maybe one day i’ll update this or make a part two -- who knows! though i’m more than content with this being my list for now haha

[icharchivist]

if i had a nickel over ships about "jaded, liar, passioned by history man, who is used to seeing the horrors of the world and is a bit distant from others and putting on a pleasant mask to get along with them, always ready to leave and be on the move, but then he accidentally gets too close and have to grapple with his position in all of this and whenever he should help or not to stop the apocalypse" blorbo

and "cursed with a hand that allows them to heal the greatest calamity that is a tool for the apocalypse coming from an old tragedy, an injustice that was never righted, they are considered a messiah as well as a bringer of bad luck, and will be deshumanized out of that, all while their hand bring them closer to an early death and to constant pain and misery" blorbo

with "and we learn as a twist that the liar is somewhat accidentally responsible for the messiah's hand to be the thing that it is and is probably linked to something that is leading us to the apocalypse (while it's been thousands of years in the making), all while the other one has to hold on to the liar whom they keep losing and promising they'll meet again, and btw the liar has been gone for over ten years in publication time"

and "also an important moment is how the liar struggles even more with that after the other loses their arm"

.... i'd have two nickels but this is wild it happened twice