#at this point its hard to tell which traits of his i DONT understand on a personal level

[floorpancakes]

im reaching new and concerning levels of understanding watanuki on a personal level

[calamarieater]

Daves ENTIRE PERSONALITY revolved around being just like Bro he never had the time to develop his own personality because from day ONE he wanted to be JUST like Bro he thought Bro was so cool to the point where he even ignored the abuse and just considered it normal, it's so common in abusive households for the abused kids to want to be JUST like their abusers because they've never seen like a normal household, and like most kids you tend to look up to your parents, which is what Dave was doing. Daves entire personality all his interests like everything were branched off from what Bro liked, he never got into things that Bro DIDNT like the only thing he didn't like was Bros puppets but dave wanted to be JUST like Bro he looked UP to him and people seem to completely ignore Bros abuse because of how dave reacted to it but ? what Bro does is still abuse and often when kids are introduced to abuse early in life they dont know that its abuse and they consider it normal which is why Dave reacted the way he did because he WASNT AWARE THAT IT WAS ABUSE WHICH IS NORMAL IN ABUSIVE HOUSEHOLDS AND ABUSED KIDS OFTEN THINK LIKE THAT which is why it comes off as such a SHOCK when you tell a kid they're being abused and whats going on isn’t normal and it seems like most of the fandom just ignores Daves abuse and everything and the fact that he never really developed his own personality until later on just because of the fact that he never really reacted or talked about it which annoys me SO badly I get its like hard to understand what abused kids are like and their bebehavior and stuff but!! you gotta understand like all his interests and everything came from Bro, his entire life until Sburb he wanted to be just like Bro he looked up to Bro so much to the point the abuse wasn't even something he considered abnormal because he thought Bro was just trying to help him be stronger and have a better reaction time or whatever but that's not what was going on and dave didn't know because he hadn't ever seen a normal household/this was his entire life this is what was normal to him so he considered it normal even compared to his friends lives, especially considering all the kids have semi abnormal lives other than john for the most part so dave was just convinced his life was normal because it was what he was used to and his friends also had odd home lives so he was just convinced that his life was the same gah I love Dave. I just think people should TRY and understand Dave’s character more, and it also just irks me how people see him as some flirty dude when thats not how he is, hes a wannabe cool-kid who has no idea how to behave and just mimics his Bros behavior!!! He WANTS TO BE JUST LIKE HIS BRO!!! HE SPENDS SO MUCH TIME TALKING ABOUT HOW COOL HE THINKS HIS BRO IS and you guys i swear he would NOT be a flirty little shit. He lives for bickering so he can come up with cool comebacks so people think “Wow this guy is REALLY fucking cool” when they're talking to him. So many of you guys seem to forget hes 13 in the beginning, his behavior is just a direct copy of how he saw Bro. He did not develop his own personality until later in life, and even then he still had a lot of Bros traits. Most kids dealing with abuse dont even know that its abuse until way late in life, because again, ITS ALL THEY KNOW!! If you lived your entire life not knowing what you were going through was abnormal, or even unhealthy, you would consider it as “the usual” WHICH IS WHY DAVE NEVER HAD A BIG REACTION TO IT, BECAUSE HE WAS SO USED TO IT. HE DIDNT KNOW IT WASNT NORMAL. Dave was a 13 year old boy dealing with an abusive father figure. From his interests to his personality, he just wanted to be like bro. that's all he wanted.

But, towards the end of his arc, we DO see him start to turn away from that desire to be like bro. We see him slowly realize, he isnt like bro. He doesnt want to be like bro. He isn't a "hero" like bro was, he doesnt WANT to be like bro was. But his entire childhood circled around being like bro, and it wasnt until bro died that he finally realized that wasn't what he wanted. But, as it wasn't until late in his life that he realized, he wasnt really able to form his own personality.

In conclusion: Dave is NOT some coolkid flirty boy, hes an abused child with no personality of his own. He is so much more than most of you guys let him be, and its so irritating to me.

[asp3nn]

i dont have any persona theories to share currently but i can give my new player thoughts on the phantom thieves (i named mine the fazvengers btw me and my friends decided on a fnaf theme)

- ok so im not sure how to perceive joker as a character. hes awesome and very cool but when im making all his decisions its hard to notice specific personality traits, at least on a first playthrough. id probably need more experience in persona studies to actually understand him as a character. his name is freddy fazballs to me also and it took a while to get used to

- ryuji is my favorite im the #1 ryuji fan🔥🔥🔥 HES SO AWESOME AND FUN and i love his personality and i thought his character is pretty well written, especially in the beginning. i adore ryuji ive never left him behind in a palace once. hes very interesting to me and i can think about him forever i love ryuji sakamoto🙏🙏

- ann is literally amazing and i thought her story was also great at the start. shes one of my favorites, my only complaint is i wish the game would stop sexualizing her. its like they forgot the point of her arc and everything she went through with kamoshida, which i very much dislike. thats not her fault tho awesome character

- yusuke is SO fun and eccentric, i adore how dramatic he is. i found his story really interesting and i also think hes funny

- makoto is cool, she kinda stands out a bit less than the others but thats fine. i think shes awesome and i dont have many issues with her in particular, but i do think shes kinda boring

- futaba omg her palace was SO INTERESTING its been my favorite palace so far. i was so engaged the entire palace, i just wanted to understand more of her character every day. i got up and cheered when she got her persona and i wrote a bunch of notes and theories. futaba is awesome love her

- haru's cool. idk her too well yet since i only really met her one palace ago, but shes nice and sweet and its very funny when shes not. also i hope we change her dumb stupid horrible fiance's heart in mementos (havent gotten far enough in her confidant to know how that goes yet)

- akechi is so fascinating to me. what is wrong with him i will find out. ive written page after page about him in my notes and i still cant figure him out, but what i do know is i think hes a liar and a snitch and a murderer and i like making fun of him. hes been my top priority confidant and i hope he has a palace and i hope its super cool and interesting

- oh and i tried to like morgana i really did but he annoys me and he needs to sit down and leave ann alone and let me stay up at night and stop telling me everything and bossing me around

- bonus round i think kasumi is also cool. apparently shes a royal exclusive character who's important to this third semester my friend keeps mentioning so im assuming that means i dont know much about her yet. which i can believe, i thought her confidant was nice and i thought she was sweet but that was about it until she got her persona. i was screaming in my notes about theories i havent been able to sort through to this day, but basically im interested to see where she goes in the future.

[24hrsoda]

it’s sometimes hard for me to tell what is fandom and what is cannon in the whole Batfam thing and I like to know what is and isn’t cannon when I write even if I do ultimately going with something that isn’t cannon

I’m learning a bit more from some of your posts bc Tim Drake is my favorite but I dont like to write him as the fannon white boy twink guy who is kind of portrayed as weaker or op but still kind of baby if that makes sense I don’t really write about things that I dont know or understand but can still sometimes get things wrong

What I am trying to say is I like your blog and follow you bc you sometimes point things out that are very popular in the fandom Like how Ra’s “stole” Tim’s spleen which didnt really happen at all

I like op Tim but its overdone and often times kind of makes his character not at all like his actual character and many times is just annoying and Ra’s is an actually cool villain that is well written but people tend to focus on the whole missing spleen thing when Ra’s isn’t really responsible for that at all Ra’s is a much cooler villain than most people give him credit for I think

Yeah, that makes sense. Some people tend to act like Ra’s thinks Tim is better than Batman, or smarter than Batman, etc. But at the same time treat him like a helpless baby. lol

I used to actually like him, especially in BTAS, but after getting in to the DC fandom it’s became so clear that the overall image of him is seemingly made up of fanon and flanderization of one or two small traits so my interest in him fell off.

I also think people assuming that Ra’s is batman’s ‘greatest enemy’ and that Tim is “so good Ra’s calls him Detective too” is a disservice to Tim, Ra’s, and even Batman’s character.

There’s more than just Bruce’s detective skills that interest Ra’s, and being a detective is a skill everyone in the family needs to do their jobs, so it reduces bruce and tim to one small part of them when there’s a lot more that goes in to being batman and robin respectively.

And with Ra’s, he doesn’t ever just pick people to invite to his cause because they’re ’good detectives’ lol. I also think he does not want to be Bruce’s enemy, he wants to be partners.

But also, don’t feel like you have to ever refer to or adhere to anything I say when making fan content of Tim. I personally don’t vibe with a lot of fanon or even modern canon stuff but that doesn’t make me an authority to tell you what you can and can’t do

[fyeahmeddy]

sorry for bothering to cut in at all but i remember seeing a few remnants of what was probably teddys work while scrolling through very old blogs some time ago. i was trying to find adventure time fanart from around that era because i felt like the fandom seemed far warmer to be in, or at least, less claustrophobic, as a “new fan” who doesnt immediately catch white hot anger at the thought of finn being intimate with either marceline or pb. i was able to get that teddy was the cornerstone of finn/marcy content, but i think bottoms up was something i didnt immediately understand because i was never able to find a post that marked the start of it. i guess what im meaning to say here is it really correlates a lot to my bummer about the perception of finn to… i guess everyone else in the fandom, even some larger figures i still see around a lot.

hes not this stupid kid incapable of comprehending his friends greater issues despite his sympathy. the literal point of his character in the role of the series’ most important relationships is his emotional intelligence. living as a singular species in a place like ooo from youth can really fuck a guy up and speed up their growth and maturity and whatnot. he didnt really have anyone his age or size that he could be attached to, and that immediately shoved him into being part of his older companions’ responsibilities.

he does get to the bottom of it, if almost predictably for the type of power fantasy the show had tended to be in its super early days, but he does it because he genuinely understands where his friends are coming from. the reason why there were grounds for a fuller-developed relationship scenario between finn and either marcy or bonnie back in the day is because the show proves their mutualisms with each other. marcy was solaced by her friendship with him and showed more of her true self with every interaction. finn wasnt just a convenient accomplice to cleaning up bonnies messes, the literal first interaction of the show has them getting along with each other, and the final bit of closure thats at the end of the last episode, surprise, is between them.

which brings me back, it shouldnt have to be so hard to keep that viewpoint up when its as synonymous as it is with the shows progression. teddys work being so hard to find and being unacknowledged in the present, to me almost paints a greater picture of how the fandom, how ive examined it, blows over this interpretation in favor of portraying finn as this wide eyed, juvenile young boy… which cartoon network and its associates have been advertising him as for literally 15 years now. its like people dont want to take in the series without being spoonfed a few traits that fit what they little can handle about him

can't add much more to this, you explain it perfectly!

yeah, you can really tell the difference between the old fandom and today's. and not only with AT, but with most media these days. people love to be spoonfed standard tropes and portrayals of the characters or take them too much at face value. I remember the AT fandom being sooooo fucking creative and innovative because they actually tried to go deeper into the characters, to stretch them out and play with them.

Bottoms UP was probably one of the first works that really touched on Finn's capacity to be the mature one and take things seriously

[rumble-aint-a-rumble-without-me]

alright hi :))

this is a continuation of the one that didn't get finished cause of glitches 😒😒 idk what i typed 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️ so here's what i THINK i typed and then some.

• im a girl gemini (diabolically cursed x5) with curly hair that's black at the roots (and then some) and dark purple at the bottom. i have dark brown eyes and im about 5'6 and i have brown skin ! im latina so im just a smidge lighter than johnny :))

• i don't have a personality because i have too many interests and different views with everything. id like to think i'm a combination of everyone and everything i find cool and interesting. which of course means i have a WIDE variety of topics in my head. i love to see the point of view from multiple people and i don't stick to just one overall opinion with things. i'm pretty indecisive but once i have a firm stance on something (like absolutely NO pineapple or mushrooms on pizza) then it's pretty hard to sway me.

• I LOVE MUSIC 🗣️🗣️🗣️🫦🗣️ i want to inject it into my soul and become one with the sound waves....but i seriously love music 💿 i have tons of cds and i caved and got spotify premium because i can't live with the ads 💔💔 i also LOVE to read and write, it's been an outlet since i was a kid so.

• i also don't have a style. like i said, i have a lot of interests and i tend to always try to let everyone know that at all times (im insufferable and pretentious unfortunately) so i'm constantly mixing it up. downtown girl meets david bowie new wave ??? check. whimsical gothic witch that listens to stevie nicks ???? check. 70's almost famous, dazed and confused wannabe ??? check. twee eternal sunshine jessica day meets juno and romana flowers ??? check. I DOMT HAVE ONE AESTHETIC 🗣️🗣️ I JUST DRESS LIKE ME AND HOPE FOR THE BEST 🗣️🗣️🗣️

• i'm not sure what my love language is ??? id assume in a healthy relationship you'd have a generous balance between all of them but idk 🤷‍♀️ leaning more into some though id def say words of affirmation and physical touch but ONLY with a romantic partner. idk why but any other kind of physical intimacy with another person just feels very weird to me and i don't like it. i always do find myself daydreaming though and wishing for affection like that from a partner so yeah 🤷‍♀️

• i slip up sometimes and call people terms of endearment 😞 i try not to cause ik some people don't like that but i always say "baby, honey, and sweetheart". sometimes i use them jokingly but i also just say them as filler tbh

• i'm not the kinda of person to go up to you and strike a conversation but if someone came up to me i wouldn't turn them away immediately. i tend to have a pretty good understanding of peoples vibes so i'd like to think i can tell when someone's being disingenuous. i'm shy at times but that's not my whole trait cause once i get comfortable you are in for JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES 🐺🐺 i don't take myself seriously very often and i like to try and make other people comfortable around me and what better why to do that than humor :) !!! i'm don't think i'm insanely funny, i just laugh at my own jokes and hope for the best 😞 i laugh a lot and i have a loud laugh 🤬 i try to tone it down though cause i get started at a lot and my overthinking ass can NOT handle that PLEASE DONT PERCEIVE ME

• once we're locked in 🤞as friends or whatever i'm LOYAL😍 someone talking bs ??? not round me partner. not. around. me. 🐺🐺 im not the confrontational type at ALL but i am fiercely defensive over people i care about so if duty calls, i must attend. (im literally batman.)

• one of my go to signature scents is lavender honey and wild fig. do with that what you will 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

OK I THINK THATS ALL SORRY IF ITS A LOT THANK YOU

(note: the format might be weird cause it is NOT letting me type in peace 😭)

Oh buddy, I think Johnny would be obsessed with you. He loves your never changing style, he can't wait to see what you've got going whenever you guys are together. He offers to help touch up your hair too, if that's something you're interested in- your terms of endearment are more than alright with Johnnycake, everytime you call him one, the butterflies in his stomach go bonkahs

[awetistic-things]

hi! i'm prof dxd autism, and i know you support self dx. i have some struggles understanding it, bc i guess,,, black and white thinking and i just,,, its very hard to make that connection, bc like, i want to support it but like theres also like, bad experiences with people claiming autism to weaponise something or all the news about fakers which might not even be true but like. im at the point where this is my view:

i support self suspecting a diagnosis, but not self diagnosis bc i think there needs to be some degree of seperation. like you can research one condition but have another, so self suspecting and accommodating is a good thing, but self diagnosis isn't because you don't have like, the full picture, and you need someone else to analyze it, so self suspect, not diagnosis. (sorry if not clear im kinda out of words rn)

but i also recognise that that view isn't really correct anymore, but im having trouble changing it so i guess what im asking is do you have any account to follow/things to read to support self diagnosis so i can change my views. totally cool if you dont want to tho. anyway bye! have a nice day. sorry.

hi 👋🏼

i can't find any specific blogs, but i do have a few things to say:

getting out of the black-and-white thinking is difficult, and i appreciate that you're trying to do so

self-diagnosing in general can be life-saving (when done right, which most of the time it pretty much is, regardless of what you see online) whether it comes to autism or breast cancer. so often, people get passed up and can't get what they desperately need due to discrimination within the medical community (and every community) so they have to take matters into their own hands

a lot of the time even when people go to get evaluated for autism, the doctor is the one who says they "suspect" the patient has autism and then don't give a diagnosis at all (happened to me three times before I got officially diagnosed) there are so many autistic people who go to get evaluated and get straight-up turned down right to their face, which usually leads them to self-diagnosing because there’s nobody willing to actually ‘analyze’ them in the first place (/nm, this reads as passive aggressive i think, but that’s not my intention, i promise /gen)

even if you are officially diagnosed there’s no telling that you’ll get any ‘analysis’ information after an evaluation (most of the time it’s just a paragraph or two) which is why self-diagnosing can be so incredible, because that’s when you get to analyze your own behaviors and traits and work through your internalized ableism so that if you do end up getting a diagnosis you’re not blindsided and have (hopefully) already accepted the fact that you are autistic

essentially what i’m trying to say is that so, so, so many psychiatrists and psychologists have internalized (or fully conscious) prejudice which heavily affects their analyzations and makes self-diagnosing so often times necessary

honestly, i think self-diagnosing is the first step in acknowledging and accepting that you’re autistic

i think many autistics who were officially diagnosed and were surprised by the fact that they’re autistic should look at it from a self-diagnosed autistics point-of-view

and by that i mean actually taking the time to forget whatever your doctor said about how you operate and instead analyze your life, because it’s yours, and nobody knows it better than you (especially from a 30 minute evaluation in a converted supply closet)

sorry if any of this came off as aggressive, it’s all genuine and i do very much appreciate you asking me this question and i hope my numerous different answers helped somewhat :)

[hirokiyuu]

sols roundup masterpost

i mentioned i was reworking the original post on my ao3 and so here it is! please note that a) there are a LOT of spoilers under the cut  (guy who has 80+ hours and multiple multiple endings) and b) there’s a lot of ways to take sol and these are just me having fun with them, if u dont like thats fine but dont tell me i don’t care. lol. also worth noting i think time loops are most fun when they subtly influence each other so there’s a lot of that in here LOL

worth noting i think theres a few traits that are pretty universal to them? wants to do right and full of love are the big two, tho curiosity, (seeming) warmth, and ability to fit in w/those around them are also pretty important tho i think more flexible. its just fun the way various sols can have those traits like.... manifest? an alien-hater sol who goes hunting all the time is just as valid as a sol dating dys that wants to end the war. just different ppl they love and different experiences. its fun

with that. onto the Meat

1) solana (she/her (demi?)girl, loyalty leaning lawyer, neutral end)

baby’s first run! outwardly warm but pretty cold inside. hypercompetent everywhere except in her love life. fell for tang when they were like nine on the ship and just sort of, never stopped, feeling that way, including when she was 100 years old and had outlived tang by nearly forty years, partially bc fixating on tang as people were dying was kind of. the only solace she had. wouldve really benefited from a good therapist.

2) solanaceae (he/him tguy, governor, peace ending)

childhood optimist with a hero complex turned "realist” but actually-exactly-the-same-just-depressed-about-it adult. saves tammy and tonin and hal! cannot save his parents :) grows a little distant from most of the people around him as a result, except dys, who Gets it. avoids tang for pretty much no reason he can understand, just has a sense of She Will Hurt You If You Get Too Close when he sees her sometimes. becomes governor solely bc he wants to save people. the kind of person you can trust in your house with your keys and your valuables and then someone asks ‘hey whats his favorite color’ and youre like. i dont. actually know

3) solane (they/them nb, gardener ending)

manic overconfident freak. definitely a ‘i wont tell people about my dreams bc it’s like i’m a HERO this way!’ type. saves everyone and extremely proud about it. coasting through life from ages 14-19 until they go find dys after the bomb has gone off and he’s dating. someone else? which makes them freak out bc THEYRE the hero. so instead of being normal about this they become a gardener in a desperate attempt not to be left behind

It’s Bad!

4) solanaceae (he/him cisguy, colonial hero, neutral ending) x / x

this is the one ive been referring to in private as “fascist manwhore sol” and honestly. yeah. just as overconfident as the last but extremely charming about it. the kind of guy you kinda wanna hit but also can’t help but like? somehow manages to be close w/most everyone in the colony despite their various opinions. really really hates the gardeners + even sym, for some reason w/in himself that he can’t explain. 

in Love with dys for most of their lives but cant ever make it work, fwb with rex, dates vace despite having matching tattoos with his ex-gf. hes just that kind of guy. dies young and a hero, less than a year after dys disappears into the ridges. dont think abt it too hard.

5) solane (she/her nb, neutral end, roboticist on accident somehow but a social skills job wouldve fit much better)

if third sol Thinks theyre god this sol like. actually Is. extremely clear dreams, used to talk abt them pretty much always until her first trip to medbay, at which point she stopped ever letting adults know. kind of existentially exhausted as a result. using this life literally just as a coffeeshop au lol. poly but also probably aromantic; open rship w/rex, who they love a lot but no more so than literally any of their other friends. pretty happy with stuff! 

until they go to see dys off when he “vanishes” from the colony and they accidentally let it drop they couldve like. ended the whole war. he’s. displeased. they still make an effort to enjoy the rest of their life but when they die theyre thinking abt how they should try to be a better person next time. and also hoping they remember less.

6) solanaceae (genderfluid but generally refers to self as a lesbian, peace end, botanist) x

cheerful heroine! desperately wants to be normal and tries so so hard to ignore her dreams, which works kind of, right up until they very purposefully ignores the one abt tammy and tammy dies immediately after :) at which point they completely switches gears and uses their dreams to try and save Everyone they can. bffs with nem since childhood & into her pretty much Always. everyone’s friend! dies content and at peace.

interestingly, bc this is the route where i got paradox ending on a save, probably the sol closest to the wormhole + everything about it, despite not actually remembering much from his dreams. it manifests in other ways. lol.

7) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, roboticist)

coward who can only be brave when it’s for the sake of the people she loves, most notably tammy who she actually dislikes until she saves her life, at which point she realizes maybe she Can be a hero too. better with robots than people, spent most of her childhood following cal around bc he was one of hte only ppl to make time for her. falls madly in love w/tammy; their family is her biggest joy. a good parent.

8) solanaceae (he/him agender, neutral end, doctor)

feral intense child who becomes a terrifying eagle-eyed doctor. max perception by age eleven, somehow. STRONG sense of justice. strongest belief is “if you ignore someone you couldve saved, you’re garbage.” not quite high enough friendship w/nem to convince her to leave vace as teens; helps her later on when theyre adults. years and years later after dys “dies” they end up moving in and spend the rest of their lives together.

9) solanaceae (they/them nb, peace end, entertainer)

awkward ace kid who always speaks their mind. accidentally destroys tammy’s confidence every time they talk. gets confessed to by both marz and rex, shoots them down extremely awkwardly due to both aforementioned asexuality and the fact theyve had a crush on dys since they were thirteen. takes their promise to let him go seriously to the point that when he tries to bomb hte colony, they let him, and when he wants to be a gardener, they don’t stand in his way. is alright with this at first but slowly begins to feel lonelier and lonelier about it as time passes, and when they die and realize they won’t actually be with him again they feel. Very Bad. pass on wishing they’d not let him go but resenting him for asking to.

10) solane (she/her cisgirl, neutral end, xeno wrangler)

ive been calling this one “cuckoo bird sol” for a reason. desperately wants someone to be devoted to Her and Her Alone who Won’t Leave, and feels like. cal is good for that. doesn’t like tammy as a result, which means that when she has a nightmare abt tammy dying she doesn't even care, it’s not like its REAL. yeah. It’s Bad! she feels guilty abt it and then feels bad bc she’s also happy bc cal spends more time with her but also she does sure feel like shes competing against a dead girl huh! so! that’s fun!

eventually she does work her shit out and realize she does like cal himself and does want kids on her own terms but like. the process of getting there! one fucked up kid. dies more content than she realized she could be, glad for her family.

11) solanaceae (she/her nb leaning, peace end, parent) x

rowdy. her heart is 80% love and 20% pure unadulterated rage. unaugmented, which she personally doesnt care abt, but she sure does get pissed off at ppl trying to be soooo nice to her abt it! too busy w/sfc stuff during wet and as such completely misses her chance to talk dys out of the bomb. when she finds him on the ridges afterwards they yell at each other abt being in love w/each other for forever and she manages to drag him back home.

in some ways this would be my “golden run” (full friendship with everyone) (jesus christ) but despite that her actual bffs besides dys are tammy and (unfortunately) vace. in another world i would retcon this to ot3 but in this one she kissed sym and then he died in front of her and despite herself she kind of cant stop flinching away from him now if he tries to make a move. they do hinge poly instead it works. has a boatload of kids and never augments any of them. dies exhausted and delighted and in love w/the world. 

12) solane (he/him cisguy, peace ending, parent oops)

delusion run! sol who cant stop talking abt his delusions even when he knows he should. pursues dys in the “we were In Love before so we will be again!” way not the “i like you!” way until he gets. y’know. lobotomized. in some ways not focusing on his dreams is good for him but also he loses a lot of his personality? focus? afterwards

teases tammy relentlessly but ends up falling for her but bc for some reason this run glitched and tammy’s pregnancy just. kept going. she never had the kid? so i didnt date her even tho he wouldve lol. tbh most of th ending for this one is what id consider noncanon for him but ill retcon it later when i have more Vibes in place

13) solanaceae (they/he, peace ending, astronaut) this is a dead dove run (mentions of abuse)

unlucky number thirteen :) sol coming out of a delusion run with the creeping sense that they should not trust Anyone with their secrets. a little disconnected from the ppl around them tho they get on well enough w/dys and tang. madly in love with the wormhole. desperate to get off the planet and back into space so they can see it, a sentiment no one shares until, y’know. vace.

in Love (lol) with him after his 50. first time theyve ever met anyone they think Gets them so they enable him. fucking crushed when he starts dating nem. when he offers to cheat they take him up on it, which means he learns nothing and they lose one of their childhood friends :) eventually they go into space together just like they wanted! it’s bad! die in the wormhole and i think thats the first time they ever truly, from the bottom of their heart, regret everything. never want to fall in love again.

14) sol (no pronouns whenever possible but sort of ok w/they, peace ending, farmer) warning for abuse mentions in this one as well

sometimes you get so badly abused in one life your next life it still affects you! kind of an odd child, gets along better w/congruence than the other kids but thinks of cal is like a brother. doing ok until helios lands and then it’s like. h

avoids vace like the plague, despises/is afraid of him but doesn’t realize why until after sol starts understanding dreams more. when he dies i think sol wants to be like Good Riddance but. cant fully. approaches rex bc sol want to know What’s Up With The Whole Rex+Vace Deal, end up falling pretty hard. dating sym also, the three of them living together is an Experience i think. dies full of Love.

15) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, athlete)

rambunctious! cheerful! kind of dumb! falls in love w/cal from a young age and is convinced they’re gonna grow up and get married and is subsequently crushed when cal starts dating tammy instead esp bc. cal sort of. lead them on a bit w/it. slowly falls in love w/dys in the aftermath.

a bit immature. plays sportsball even in the middle of war, tension with both cal And nem as a result despite still being their bffs. he and nem are on opposite sportsball teams for the rest of their lives and yet go out for drinks after constantly. she’s his sister, basically! dies pretty happy w/how things turned out

16) solanaceae (she/they, neutral end, merchant)

greedy greedy greedy. wants money and love and attention, time and people and things, everyhting you can think of she wants it. she marz and tang are the Terrible WLW Trio of Girls Who Might Be Dating. bit of a soft spot for dys she can’t quite rationalize, will be kind to him when she’s not to anyone else. fond of rex as well.

she and marz flirt by flirting with tang, aka the person she Actually likes. pretty happy when they finally hook up, but isn’t devastated by the breakup as much as she is.... left hollow. another mistake on top of everyhting else (capitalism, dys vanishing, girl shes liked forever dumping her, also theres maybe a fleet from earth coming but haha dw abt it) she tells rex abt the fleet maybe a year? before it shows up. dies wishing desperately she had been able to be kinder.

17) solana (he/him tguy, peace end, professor) x

sugary sweet! childhood friends with tammy, they’re v similar people. loves her a lot, cannot wait to be best man at her wedding to cal LOL. despite his gentle demeanor he is also absolutely the kind of guy to do Whatever It Takes for the ppl he loves (ie poisons uncle tonin to keep him alive LOL)

thinks nomi is like, the coolest person in the universe when they meet bc they can MAKE things. so so stupid about them. when they start dating its embarrassing for everyone but they are so happy together no one can actually say anything. dies happy but wishing he was more confident in himself/brave

aaaaaaaaanyways that’s the current list. for Now. there may be more coming. i have offshoots of some of these as well that may or may not pop up wwww generally for fic that isn’t set with a specific sol i tend towards an nb sol closest to personality+dreams to my sixth sol? cheerful and trying to help but also Just A Kid about it!

[magicalmyu]

guess who's gonna rant about anti entropy!!!! its me!!!!!

okay so today im gonna talk about tesla, because i talk about eins and welt enough on discord and i appreciate tesla just as much as the others.

(continued after the cut)

so, first of all, tesla definitely has a crush on eins. even if you disregard everything in the mangas and game as "oh but they're just close friends, they don't actually like each other," the vn makes it so damn clear that tesla has a huge crush on her colleague. whether it's the running joke that tesla likes to spoil eins while hating joyce's guts, or how she seems jealous of how much attention eins gives joyce, there's definitely some unrequited love going on here.

now, aside from the einsla propaganda, I'd also like to talk about tesla's character and attitude. while on the surface, she seems like your average tsundere, doing more digging shows that's not the case. in the VN, tesla seems significantly nicer, only losing her temper every now and then instead of being frustrated with someone at any given moment. however, one thing that should definitely noted is how much she cares for the others. in the visual novel, she frequently expresses worry for joyce, despite her supposedly disliking him. whether it's her being concerned at the start of the vn when joyce wasn't answering the door, or her lashing out at him after he refused to protect himself while eins extracted the soulium from the painting, telling him that he doesn't want him to give himself up to protect others, she shows how much she really cares for others in numerous ways.

this other side of tesla isn't just exclusive to the vn, too! second eruption and the nagazora chapters also give some insight to these character traits. in second eruption, when joachim confronts tesla about his plan to defeat sirin on the moon, she gets angry at him. this scene seems to parallel her scene with joyce in the vn, where she also states that "she hates people like him [who try to sacrifice themselves without any thought]" which may be a direct reference to the vn scene in question. apart from this, tesla also reminds eins to stay safe after she went out in the arahato mech to confront sirin. (ofc eins gets absolutely owned and in any other case i would be mad but tbh sirin is a queen too so no hard feelings <3)

in thunders over nagazora, tesla expresses concern for kiana and mei's situation. in fact, she didn't even want to be the one to tell mei the news, which is why she got tesla to do it for her. (i dont remember this one perfectly so lmk if i misremembered anything) there's also some archives from a source currently unknown to me (it might be the herrscher of thunder trial stages tho) where eins and tesla discuss what happened in nagazora. tesla expresses guilt over the situation, and believes that she and eins could have done something in order to prevent it. eins, as usual, comforts tesla and assures her that she understands her frustration and that they will work towards a good solution.

now, why does she act this way? and more importantly, why is her character in the vn so wildly different from her character in the game and manga? well, i have a theory of my own.

remember how tesla said she didn't want to see joyce "drown in his own compassion"? well, guess what happened to him? yep, she predicted his downfall: his own compassion. surely, after a tragedy as horrible as this, especially considering how eins was also noticeably affected by his death, you would think that she would change because of this too. and thus, she did. she begins to think that if she made herself unlikable, to the point where no one would care enough about her that they would give up their lives like joyce did, she wouldn't have to go through the pain of losing someone like him again. whether it was eins, or joachim, or even the hyperion crew, they must all mean a lot to her. perhaps this is why she resonated with kiana and mei, too. mei was a victim of the same thing eins and tesla were - the inability to protect someone who didn't even want to protect themselves.

but, of course, i can't really say im completely correct here. after all, im not hoyoverse.

in conclusion, i feel like tesla's character is misunderstood quite often by the fandom. she, along with joyce and eins, are definitely some of the most underrated characters in honkai, in my opinion.

tl;dr, tesla genuinely cares about people close to her, she just had her own ways of expressing this love due to past experiences.

[lesboygamzee]

Any examples about the gamtav artist thing?

i dont really want to give examples because i dont want to shit on specific artists even if they piss me off but i can elaborate on shit ive noticed . gonna get ranty so :

tl;dr : gamtav artists who are weird about gamzee and dont care about tavros have a weird way of characterising both which makes me very uncomfortable and im upset about it because im a little hater . and also because its gross and annoying

i feel like a lot of gamtav artists who just like gamzee and dont care much for tav make it pretty clear they just want gamzee to get what he wants forever and always . which is Bad . thats pretty vague still but yknow ..

they make tavros just kind of . there as a support to gamzee to kiss all his problems away and make him happy and dont really do much of the other way around ( and if they do its always gamzee being like ' [fucked up font] I WILL PROTECT YOU ' while also acting like a romantic relationship would fix tavs problems with .. romance related shit . because they dont want to see the actual issues tavros was going through because they dont care enough about her

obviously the soft non-confrontational accessory-to-another-character characterization of tav isnt specific to gamtav shippers . it is very unfortunately huge in the fandom . but its still very common with them despite it going against .. everything that makes the ship potentially interesting imo .

tavros isnt soft she doesnt go along with everything someone wants of her . especially not a highblood are you fucking insane . tavros should reject gamzee after that initial conevrsation she did not fucking reciprocate ( i dont care about your fanfic ! you arent fixing shit ! ) and even if she did she made it very clear she still didnt want that relationship because give her a fucking break man . if its gonna happen let her come back in a few sweeps when she has less shit to come to terms with and start it up on her terms thats fine . this is the best way of doing it for both of them . gamzee doesnt get to immediately get what it wants and tavros actually gets a fucking say in things . its not that hard to understand

even if it isnt as obvious with some artists its still There . gamzee is the main character focused on in the relationship because the artist just . really doesnt know enough about tavros to write about her further than ' gamzees [girl]friend who [vague traits about her that might not even be canon] ' . and they probably dont care .

they dont care that tavros should be more mean for her own good even if its just playful banter they dont care thered realistically be some conflict between the two if they were ever actually involved with eachothers lives to that extent they dont care that they characterize tavros the way shes expected to act by other characters and not how she actually does . they dont care that tavros is a character separate from the ship they have reduced her down to despite her having ONE ONSCREEN CONVERSATION with gamzee . two pesterlogs that make up one converaation . come on man

i was definitely being a little generalized with the whole ' you can ALWAYS tell super easy ' thing which i will admit i tend to do but really people who are weird about gamzee and dont care about tavros are just . very prominent in the fandom and there is an upsetting trend od how they porteay gamtav and how it spreads as if any of it is supported by canon .

theres not really a point to this i just really adore tavros shes my favourite ever and has been since her first pesterlog with dave ans it pisses me off to see how the fandom reduces her down to a horribly mischaracterized ship that is admittedly a huge comfort to me !! its upsetting !!

[asscrackcreed]

part 2 after the author replied i wasnt sure if i should carry on but with their unapologetic attitude ofc i went through with it

STOP WITH THE KADAR AND MASTURBATING THING ITS FUCKING GROSS WHY DOES HIS BROTHER A N D MOTHER KNOW !!!!!!!’ ENOUGH

omg kadar is 16 and maliks 19 shut the fuck up EWWWWW

ok let me explain it properly this author fetishised kadars teenage hormones why do we keep coming back to kadar wanting to have sex esp if hes a minor its disgusting theyve made a point that u can explore gross things in fiction because yk its fiction and not irl and tbh idgaf because youre telling me you enjoy reading about a minors sexual life? youre telling me you enjoy reading about a brother telling his MINOR brother about HIS sex life? defend incest if u want im not here to change ur mind about incest but if u think that u can just write about minors sexually u are fucking disgusting

a lot of talk about god but none of it relates to the story or being gay so idk not interested

DES AND EZIO KISSED. WITH TONGUE. AND EZIO INSTIGATED IT?

chapter 27^ i cant do it anymore its 3am as im typing i’ll finish the rest when i wake up

kadars only personality trait is being horny tf

adha is very religiously strict and thinks altaïr is a godless pig uhm. ok… making adha rude is very uncalled for you couldve chose to use a random woman like…. a stranger but no it had to be canon altaïrs dead ex… and altaïr says ‘i dont know much about islam’ i dont understand why some fanfic authors insist on making altaïr completely atheist, i feel like altaïr wouldn’t be religious tbfh but hed still have islamic norms and values. when we can write characters in a way the original source material doesnt why cant we include cultural and religious aspects? why do ppl try so hard to remove the fundamental aspects of islamic culture. altaïr not knowing islam just drags the story more because if he did then hed understand adha and like idk hed connect with malik more and adhas anger would be justified but here she is being an ass and assuming the worst because…? she could’ve just called him an asshole idk why she dragged religion into this its reminding me of strict religious ppl who hate the new generation so far there hasn’t really been much about the good things of islam

adhas apologising now for assuming the worst. she paints smth for him? doesnt really make sense but alright

if altaïr can honor his mum with a tattoo (which is haram but anyways) he could surely honor his dad by celebrating eid or smth or just praying some time idk the paragraph im reading is about how his grandmas not religious and his dad was a practising muslim but never taught altaïr which ok he died when altaïr was 5 fine but idk the authors very intent on making sure altaïr isnt muslim but personally if he was muslim it’d be interesting because then hed struggle with his faith and himself i mean malik doesnt seem to struggle at all so idk ig everyones different

excuse me? so we can add black fetishisation to the list as well cuz wtf was that? it doesnt even add to the story its so random and unnecessary?

uhm altaïr and adha fell in love not a lot of depth to their relationship considering this mustve been over the course of days maybe even a few weeks idk just not a lot of time as it is to uh fall in love but shes engaged so theyve left it at that still not a bad plot point ig but it doesnt affect malik as of yet which undermines this plot point but lets see what happens

leo and sofias interactions are cute i like this leo malik and sofia friendship going on

im not gonna comment on any more incest its obvious this author just has a thing for it and theres so many fics that have incest and if i was to really fight that id do it for the other fics too also i wont comment on their writing as a whole anymore the main issue here is the cultural erasure and fetishisation

these do not affect the plot in any way shape or form, yes its an old 2014 fanfic but the author seems to not give a fuck that theyve written gross things. as well as poorly write islamic characters, it feels like a ‘youre either religious or your not’ and writing things like this is harmful! youre telling readers that muslims are either very harsh (like adha was) or very sweet (like maliks mum for being okay that maliks gay) but what about the catholic side of the family? theres no indication that they’re homophobia stems from religion. also ppl think its okay to just make altaïr unaware of his own heritage and faith? yes hes not muslim per say but hes syrian? his father died young but you can choose to write about the family wanting to help altaïr keep his customs alive. its white. its so white. it makes me more upset that the author will only focus on us disliking incest rather than accept that they’re wrong for cultural erasure. youve told hs that he’s syrian and white but just added that he misses his dad. and u cant defend sexualising kadar at all i wont hear anything about that because what u enjoy in fiction is also a reflection of what you enjoy irl. if you think incest is cool you will have a natural interest of it irl theres a reflection of your interests in your writing. if for example i wrote angst you would naturally expect that i like it or have a connection to it in some way, that i enjoy somehow. but i dont really like angst i could write for it but thats from my experience and thought process. someone who writes smut doesnt mean that they’re sexually active but theyve thought about it, they might’ve done some research to it. do u see what im tryna say? you are actively advancing on your interests when you right about them in fiction, you have a connection to it. if you hated smut someone would assume you hated it irl. the logic applies here too, if you dont like incest irl and it grosses you would simply not read incest in fiction because it grosses you out. if you dont like cultural erasure and sexualising minors irl then why tf would u add it to ur fic? why would u think that the boundary fiction would allow that to be okay? and the thing is micro-aggressions back in 2014 were bad and i know that but the author having had feedback and not even acknowledging it in this day and age is disgusting. ppl say they like sass verse, i have to say the plot of it is interesting but there were so many unnecessary aspects that did not contribute or feel nice to read at all. even if someone uses the excuse that they didnt know smth about islam, i as brown muslim you can not dismiss my feelings towards the way they wrote any muslim characters.

[creacherkeeper]

multiples of 7 for the character asks for bo!! <3

7. what quality do they like the least about themselves?

OOF. WHAT A WAY TO START. i think theres a Lot about himself bo doesn't like and he's still coming to terms with what a lot of that means like. In Context. of like. Everything. but i think Right Now the thing he doesn't like the most is that he makes people sad. because he can Tell but he also cant Help It and he's trying to find the balance between. opening up. and making people Worry about him. because he!!! does not want to affect the people he cares about in a negative way!!! its fine if they do that to him but not the other way around. he's not supposed to take up space <3

14. do you have a favourite conversation that they’ve had with another character? briefly describe it!

i definitely have favorite conversations with the pcs, but i think my favorite conversation with an npc was when they were in the book and bo got. a little mad. at bubba. for not just working things out with ezzy. and yelled at him a wittle bit. just bc i think that was like a Turning Point for bo of like. maybe the first time he ever acted selfishly towards someone? and knew he was acting selfish and said it anyway? and just being like. actually me and rosie deserve a full family so why cant you get your shit together. which like. in hindsight with everything we know about them now, Harrowing for bubba, but it was also bo like. showing he felt safe enough with bubba to get upset at him? bc that's pretty rare for bo

21. without revealing any secrets, how much of your character’s backstory does the rest of your party know about? 20%? 75%? 0%?

i mean. broad strokes, 100%. there's always going to be little details to flesh out, but bo backstory was pretty simple and didn't get changed at all from original version to now. all the nuance that's come with it has come from hollis. i didnt know jack shit about bubba or him and eabha's relationship or the rangers or anything. i found out In Game with everyone else (madly affectionate)

28. what is something that helps to comfort them?

talking to kai <3 kai is really good at both grounding him but also making him like. actually deal with stuff so he gets it out of his system. he's used to being like. oh i'm upset. gonna bury this forever. but kai is like. okay bud we're gonna talk through it and then chill out and bo is like wait huh this actually helps?? wild

35. pick a character that they know. what is something that they do that your character finds annoying/frustrating?

flip side of that,,, less annoying and more frustrating / concerning but. kai not eating well <3 bo is such a big food guy and like. is so used to people showing care through food. and so kai will stress bo needs to take care of himself because he deserves to feel good and then will have like. an iced coffee for breakfast and not eat again for 8 hours and it drives bo insane. he doesn't understand how they can be so in tune with things emotionally and also expect so much from their body and fighting abilities and then not take care of it right

42. how similar is your character to you?

MEAN QUESTION. i think more similar than i would like to admit but not as similar as i would fear. i think we have some good traits in common and some bad traits in common and some hangups in common but overall we have fairly different like. cores. and life experiences, obv. it is sometimes hard for me to play bo cause im like noooooo i dont want to say this but its what bo would say!!! it what bo would think!!!! im very much a Character Actor as a player and me and bo differ. A Lot in how we go about the world

[ravysu]

Sannin headcanons and thoughts

The last thing I would like to post for the sannin week. It is still 24.04 here! :D @sannin-central

This is long. Spoiler alert. Mostly Orochimaru, some Tsunade, a little of Jiraiya (because his story is pretty clear and spoken and idk what I can add). Also I recommend to read this meta about Orochimaru, it has influenced me a lot and has some good points. Sorry for any posible grammar mistakes. Also I really should put here a lot of references to the manga or anime but it was something that was piling up for a year and I'm soooooooo lazy. After all, those are just headcanons. Also: Im not excusing Oro's bad stuff here, Im trying to understand the reasons.

Ive already posted some hcs, here, here and here.

1. First if all, the chronology pic of sannin lifetime based on the info i found on naruto wiki and also some statements about wars from this post. It was tough considering what a mess naruto’s chronology is.

2. Sannin story shows what it cost to be a legend. They're like Team 7 but more realistic. Tsunade literally carried the war but left with nothing and developed a ptsd and have problems to just live on. Also anger control issues. I think she can be pretty bossy and stubborn which is not always nice. Jiraiya is the hero of the day but also very idealistic and can ignore some important details in the real word whether its the fight (he always injured during flashbacks maybe because each time he took too much to handle and on the one hand it's heroistic but on the other is a mistake that can lead your team to situations like in that Iwa cave) or your friends issues (I bet he saw what's going on but thought it's fine until Oro actually got red handed and left). He lives in his world and may have problems to get out to see it through someone else's shoes. As for Orochimaru, it seems like he was a normal guy for 20+ years (I mean, he didn't do crazy criminal shit and had something good in him and it was stated somewhere that it was his teammates influence. It is obvious they considered him as a friend, I don't thinks it was for nothing) but we mostly know his darkest side. Despite being a moster he is a human that have empathy and some ordinary human traits (man just decorates every bit of an environment he is in lol).

3. Tsunade was the leader of team Hiruzen.

4. Tsunade sometimes hit Jiraiya for some stupid things he did or said but never touches Orochimaru even if he did something same. Jiraiya complained about it once and almost got another hit.

5. Jiraiya had problematic parents that didn't care about him much and a lot of time he was wandering in the streets.

6. Judging by the look of Oro bangs and hair, he sometimes cut it off. A stress relief huh? And the fact that he doesn't do it now in Boruto..

7. It was shown that Tsunade and Orochimaru was acknowledged before they become a team. Maybe they did just before, or maybe some longer time before. I prefer the second option and hc that they met because both had no real friends - Orochimaru seemed weird and scary for everyone and Tsunade was Senju so everyone wanted to hang out with her but didn't really care. They weren't seen as what they were - people put the labels on them. But they didn't care about each other's labels and actually saw each other in true lights.

8. Tsunade knew it was an accident and it's not right but still she blamed Orochimaru for Nawaki's death for some time. It was something that seriously damaged their friendship and the team. Orochimaru was mad but also guilty, after all, he was responsible at least as a shinobi since Nawaki was under his watch. So he started to act cold and emotionless and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

9. Jiraiya was in Ame while Dan died.

10. The whole his orphans mission was a bit irresponsible tbh. They already fought Hanzo and as he stated the conflict between Konoha and Ame is going to an end with Konoha's win. It's weird to stay here for three years in the middle of the war while there were other lands to fight. He left his teammates for some idea. Maybe that caused another crack in their team friendship.

11. If Tsunade would have find a way to live on with her trauma and follow the will of fire and stuff it would affect Orochimaru as well just as her grief affected him. It's like he would get an example that you can live on with this pain. So death isn't above human capability and we are not just the slaves of mortality (sounds stupid but i dont know how else to describe sorry). But as we know what he actually saw is that it broke her crucially to the point she couldnt be herself again. And so the death is above everything.

12. Oro wasn’t just acting as a cold pragmatic bitch in that cave but also tried to save Tsunade. Jiraiya knew it and that’s why he showed this sign to him like "I see what youre doing here" and that stunned Oro because he would prefer to look rather like a cold pragmatic bitch hehe

13. Just a thought. People in the village probably treated Oro as a foreigner or just wouldnt accept him because he looked so differently and had a weird attitude. That's why he sometimes didn't feel that Konoha is his home. After the wars where people were treated as means and tools, even the children, he himself developed this view on people - he dehumanized them and used as the means to his goals, just as his village did. Funny thing some people were straightly dehumanizing him too like Ibiki thought that he was a demon (tho he was a child). And he probably weren't the only one. Anyways the point is that it's logical that Orochimaru don't care about anybody but some few people, he's the product of his era. He's like Naruto that would chose the hatred way. But naruto had some good and understanding people around him and.. Orochimaru had them too, but match how Iruka treated Naruto and this Hiruzen's "I sAw tHe mAliCe in This cHiLd fRoM tHe BegGinNinG". And oro didn't even have a big ass evil fox in him. sry i hate hiruzen

ANYWAYS the moral of the story is not "go criminal if they hurt you" but always treat people like people. Waving my hand to Kant.

14. The reason why Orochimaru didn't pick some good morals to stick with through the hard times no matter what (like, idk, Jiraiya or Naruto) is because 1) I think he is/was pretty depending on people around him 2) the war fucked him and his friends up too much (Nawaki incident + Tsunade) 3) twisted addictions (though I don't think he's that sadistic, we never saw him torturing randoms just for fun, it was always some science experimental shit. He tends to get fun out of cruelty only when it's personal) that maybe developed as a way to sublimate anger and sadness caused by his parents loss (that's what they share with sasuke - unlicke naruto, they knew their parents and it's other kind of pain. Sasuke developed a revenge issue and Orochimaru - cruelty pleasure which... is kinda the same but less epic and more occasional lol).

15. Speaking of that, Orochimaru cared for Sasuke because he saw himself in him.

16. Oro hold grudges against Hiruzen for not choosing him to be Hokage not only because he was ambitious and/or egoistic, but also because Hiruzen was some kind of a father figure for him and his approval was important tho i doubt he was aware of that. He also probably could tell that Hiruzen was suspicios about him when he was a child and that led to many conflicts and was hurting as well.

17. Tsunade knew things weren't pretty with Orochimaru after the wars but she never expected them to be this bad. During the week that she was given in her arc she thought not only about how much she wants to see Nawaki and Dan again despite how wrong would it be but also was trying to bury all the good memories she had left of Orochimaru so it would be easier to kill him.

18. She poisoned Jiraiya exactly because she knew he would not let her do it. Jiraiya was always hesitant to kill and inclined to forgiveness, while Tsunade, as mentioned by Orochimaru, could be merciless (so much so that he was not surprised when Kabuto suggested that she wanted to use Jira for Edo Tensei).

19. That was one of her traits that scared Jiraiya and fascinated Orochimaru.

20. Remember how Oro grabbed Jiraiya's neck when the latter was trying to cover with hair jutsu? On the snake, in Tsnade's arc. Orochimaru could have easily kill Jiraiya by pulling the sword out of the mouth (arteries are right there) but he didn't. As well as he could kill Tsunade when she was still shaking - just aim for the neck or the heart. Instead, he just injured her lung and kicked her which is not a big deal for the kind of shinoby like her at all.. Also he helped Anko not accidentally kill herself but it would be way much profitable to let her do it. "Orochimaru has no feelings".

21. The reason he suddenly wanted to kill Tsunade instead of forcing her to heal his arms as it was planned (which is weird since it will not going to get him heals and he kinda said that he wouldn't want to kill her just minutes ago) is that not only she refused to help him (he thought he could work it out) but she also prefered the village over him (from his point of view). Out if everyone she was the closest to being able to understand him since the village caused her painful losses too but nevertheless she agreed to be on it's side.

22. He wasn't fighting her back in the end partly because he thought he deserved that. Somewhere deep inside hahah.

23. Tsunade got a fear to develop deep bonds so they probably weren't very close with Shizune (also the way she knocked her down in this hotel.. oh).

24. Orochimaru will be here when she'll die.

25. Orochimaru's eng dub to Tsunade: "I often wondered what it would be like to ring that pretty neck yours". No comments.

26. Orochimaru is either bi/pan or ace. Anything or nothing lmao

27. Hiruzen knew about at least some of the Oro’s illegal experiments and was okay just as he was okay with the Foundation all the time. Because it’s useful. Then he has discovered he went too far OR he knew everything and oro just became too inconvenient because of his methods. The way Orochimaru tells Sasuke about reasons they are well treated as the criminals is based on in his experience with Hiruzen.

28. As you may know the lyrics in Orochimaru’s music theme goes “don’t talk with the silence of the heart”. It was taken from one Indian song that also had lines like “don’t question life too much”, ”pain arose somewhere in the chest”, “don’t speak to the wounds of the heart”. Though I’m not sure 100% because I was translating it with some hindi dictionary with like zero knowledge of hindi

29. I like to think that this “silence of the heart” theme and the fact that he called his village a hidden sound village are somehow connected. The hidden sound is the possible explanation of all things waiting to be listened to but the truth is silent and you know it deep in your heart and it bothers you. The world is silent just like the life is meaningless but people can only hear. *Sigh* anyways

30. Orochimaru’s journey is the one about accepting death. When he saw Karin released her chains while was trying to get to Sasuke he understood that the death is a part of human’s strength.

Can’t wait to feel that everything I wrote is wrong or not enough or stupid and obvious lol. Anyways, it’s something that I wanted to share until I move to some other fandom.

[colourful-void]

Supporting Satoshi - an examination and comparison of JN36 and XY121

Part One: Snowballs do not cure depression but it was worth a shot

You know that episode of Pokemon where a gym leader beats Satoshi in a battle so hard that one of his pokemon gets mildly hurt (though there's no long term effects) and because of it he becomes depressed, closing himself off from his friends before someone comes along to pull him out of that mental state, and also severe weather phenomena is involved and a reflection of a persons mental state? Or rather, the two episodes?

So when I was watching Journeys, I noticed an episode that had a similar-- but distinctly different-- plot to an xy episode I had seen before. And what was particularly interesting was that while I couldn't stand the xy episode, the journeys episode was one of my favourites. I won't drag this out for you guys, I love the journeys episode and re watch it a LOT and the xy episode sort of just leaves me with a sour taste in my mouth. and don't go claiming its solely ship bias, because i saw the xy episode first and disliked it then.

This will analyze both of these episodes, comparing them against each other. Specifically within the context of how Goh and Serena both help Satoshi through a similar situation There will be some discussion of AmourShipping and Satogou in this analysis. I'm going to be a bit negative regarding Serena's actions and the potential "romantic" weight of them here, but I want to be clear that I Do Not dislike Serena as a character. Personally, I wish the writers had given her more room to grow outside of her romantic interests, but I do not hate Serena as a character. I do, however, disagree with her actions in this episode. Please don't take this out of context and dont be ship fighting in the comments, it's boring. This is a comparison of These Two Episodes, not of Goh and Serena and their respective ships as a whole.

This part mainly focuses on the xy episode and the second will focus mainly on the journeys. It's only divided into parts because of the tumblr post limit.

(If you like the xy episode or hate the journeys episode, awesome! having your own opinions is great. these are mine though, so i hope you'll listen to them)

With that out of the way, let's start. And I'm going to use mostly japanese names here because I'm taking screencaps from the subbed japanese copies.

The set up for each of these episodes is eerily similar as pointed out in the gag at the start.

Xy has a bit more set up before the episode in question though, with the initial loss and retreat into the forest by Satoshi taking place the episode before. The episode opens up proper with Satoshi taking time to breathe to himself, alone in the forest.

Emphasis is placed on him taking a deep breath, aided by the visuals showing them (thanks cold air) and the silence of the rest of the soundscape, with the only other sounds being the wind and some bird pokemon, plus some falling snow.

Journeys Satoshi starts off in a better mental state than Xy, with the episode starting off with him jogging along with his pokemon.

However, we can still see that he's been affected by the last battle he lost, against Saitou, as he's putting a lot of effort into training and doing better.

Which, doesn't go well for him, as he loses his next two battles as well, and drops in the World Championship ranking as a result

And he's pretty upset about it too. Same thing as over in xy. In both cases, a respective friend/love interest notes that Satoshi is upset and expresses concern.

He's got support from his friends in both situations! But that support comes across in very different ways.

But, to understand how that support manages to affect Satoshi, we need to understand the problem at play.

Now, I wanna make something clear here. Satoshi's problem is not that he is a sore loser. I'm not arguing that's not a contributing factor, or that he's not upset about the loss (particularly in the world championships), He's still bitter about the lost part, but the root of the problem is not losing, he's been shown to be fine with losing (if not a bit more motivated to win now) in prior episodes.

Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are getting hurt, because they're losing battles. Satoshi's problem is that his pokemon are losing battles because he's not training them well enough. And to clarify, that's not my viewpoint, it's his. Satoshi's problem is that he's not good enough for himself, and he feels that that's something he has to fix on his own.

So how do we help him?

Our weather event in question is introduced in separate points in the episodes, but I'll cover them both now.

In xy, it's this snowstorm, which conveniently becomes a problem directly after Serena returns to the Pokemon Centre.

In journeys, it's a sandstorm! That's in near direct contrast to a snowstorm! Incredible.

Heading back to xy Satoshi, things aren't going great in the forest. Luckily, Serena's run off to find him.

I think it's of note here that Serena runs off with the best intentions, she wants to help Satoshi, plain and simple. It just sort of goes wrong along the way.

It's worth noting that Xy Satoshi tries to bring himself out of being sad by the tried and true method of "stop being sad"

Despite telling himself this, he doesn't get anywhere. Which makes sense, because it's not getting the the root of the problem. It's not even addressing it at all. He's just trying to 'be better', which isn't even a battle strategy. However, it is something I can see him saying, so this isn't a critique of Satoshi's thought process, but me pointing out that this isn't really effective. Which is supported by the narrative, because again, he doesn't get anywhere, he doesn't even move.

I can't show it in screencaps but the lights in Satoshi's eyes are shaking here, something that they consistently do throughout the series when he's feeling a particularly strong emotion. Keep that in mind. It couples well with another trait of his, and that's his hat!

And by that I mean how he hides his eyes with the brim of it when upset, something he does exactly as Serena shows up and calls out to him. Now, he's not upset that Serena is here. He's upset about the pokemon stuff still. He's trying to hide the fact that he's upset from Serena.

Serena starts off with her speech well, trying to appeal to Satoshi to let her in and talk things out. And maybe it's because he wasn't ready for it yet, or because of the way she phrases it (a lot of 'i' and 'me' language which can be helpful but can also come across as though she's making it about her. not her intent i don't think, but a possible interpretation.), it's not her fault for how Satoshi reacts regardless.

But how Satoshi reacts is not good.

Now it's really interesting to note that before this, Serena was standing while Satoshi was sitting, putting her above him in terms of active power, when it comes to how the shot is presented, but when Satoshi stands up, the camera tilts with the movement so that they're on equal level. Neat!

And Serena yells in return, scolding Satoshi for not talking about it. Not the best move, since pushing someone to talk about something that's upsetting them isn't really productive, but she's trying here and she's frustrated.

Satoshi continues to withdraw and self isolate, claiming it is his problem and that he wants to be left be. Now, this is the mindset of a clearly upset person and isolation may not be the best option, but he did make the explicit request to be left alone here.

He's clearly upset as he turns away from Serena's eye and slumps over a little.

And then Serena throws a snowball at him.

Angry as he is, you can see Satoshi's expression change when he sees Serena's reaction.

Serena tells Satoshi that she's not like the Satoshi she knows, who is always full of energy and positive and a leader, and a bunch of other positive traits. The problem here, is that Serena's looking at an idealized version of Satoshi. And while the intent here was probably meant to be something more like "you have so many wonderful traits about you I know you can do this", coupled with the snowballs and the phrasing, it seems as though Serena is scolding Satoshi for being sad.

Or rather, being angry with him for not living up to her idealized version of him, and not wanting him to express any negitave emotions.

Which is sort of a really bad mindset.

The snowballs continue, never once does Satoshi fight back. In fact, he stops arguing entirely after the first one. Serena knocks him off his feet and tells him he's not being himself, before running off. (In the english dub, Serena claims that Satoshi isn't being "the real satoshi" and then demands that the real Satoshi be "given back", so it could be worse)

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up. Something like this just isn't like him. He's just gotta stop being sad!

Now personally, I really disagree with the idea that "being upset" isn't "like a person". That's because based off of my own experiences, I know it can be really damaging to hold the mindset that any negative emotions you feel aren't a part of you and that you shouldn't be upset because you're usually a positive and happy person. Not the case with every person, but I personally really have a problem with shows telling children that they just shouldn't be upset instead of processing their emotions in a meaningful way. (The journeys episode doesn't do an outstanding job of it either, but this is a bit of a tangent anyway. A show that does do this right is "OK KO! Let's be Heroes" which actually deals with this problem in greater depth and does a fantastic job of it.)

But the snowball scene ends here. Now I'll get back to Journeys in a moment, but since Serena has finished her part of the comparison for the most part, I'm going to summarize a bit more of the xy episode.

Satoshi decides to literally run his problems away, because it will help him reach some kind of conclusion, and immediately trips and falls down a large hill. No, I'm not making that up.

The snowstorm kicks in, Serena get back annoyed, then similarly groans and yells, and the whole xy gang + pokemon go running off in search of Satoshi. Pikachu appears the most concerned.

Now Serena tells the others she lost her cool and said something horrible to Satoshi, but explains its because Satoshi is someone she admires. Cool motive, I get it, still kinda bad.

and in the end, it's not Serena's words that get he message across to Satoshi. The solution to this problem was Satoshi finding a way to reaffirm his abilities and instinct.

In the xy episode, he helps some pokemon out of the tree, and when his very cool frog friend shows up, they're able to work together with their bond to save this one from falling off a cliff.

Here's the point. Satoshi learns by doing, by actions. He needs to see first hand that there are ways of getting past his problems, and that it's worth having the courage to keep going. The lesson is about valuing pokemon as equals and partners, and specifically that trying to be better as the trainer alone isn't going to help.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am and I'm not sleeping until this is finished so we gotta keep things moving.

This was no doubt Serena's intent to get a similar point, but she goes about it the wrong way. She tries to convey this with words, as conversation and motivational words have helped her in the past (Elle's words of praise stick with her, Satoshi's words from when they were kids, etc). It's a good idea, but their different ways of learning and growing from a similar situation are incompatible, and that's why things don't work out in Serena's favour. There's also still the problem of "pulling yourself together" not being helpful in this case.

There's also a very similar line in this scene to the one at the end of the journeys episode, as Satoshi says to his frog that they should start over from scratch. It's essentially the same phrase with different wording. It's great. The Storm ends as he realizes this as well! Wonderful in terms of pathetic fallacy.

The gang all reunites, its nice. Satoshi thanks Serena for what she said after apologizing to everyone, which contradicts what he said earlier but I've already established that I dislike this message here so I won't go over it too much. I guess he's right in a literal sense in that in response to her words he went and ran until he tripped off a cliff but the emotional growth here was because of his own actions (and the frogs), not Serena's. Sorry Serena, you'll get em next time.

This is essentially where this plot line ends, team rocket is there for a bit as well but as much as i love them they're not relevant here, and some fun stuff with the league, love it not important right now its like 3am as I write this so we gotta keep things moving.

So. What about Goh?

Well...

(Part Two here on account of image limit!!)

[blondebooklion]

why it drives me crazy when people say c!ranboo has no morals but think c!wilbur and c!ranboo could still have potential to be narrative foils

morals:

loyalty to family/friends: in both his normal functioning and his enderwalk stage ranboo is incredibly defensive of his loved ones. this is 100% the center of his moral compass. he doesn't do certain things he fears will upset others (thus succumbing to peer pressure yes) but i deeply disagree with people argument that that is proof he has no moral backbone. particularly due to a couple of instances:

ranboo visiting tommy in exile: while not directly breaking the rules there was a general expectation, especially the people ranboo spent his time with, of not really visiting tommy. it wasnt really a set rule or anything but ranboo was definitely putting himself at risk by doing so.

protectiveness over michael: when sam and puffy showed up to prank ranboo, he was incredibly defensive over his son. he was ready to kill to protect his son if it came down to it.

rescuing tommy+tubbo: while we have it confirmed this instance was in their enderwalk stage, ranboo going both proves ranboos values in the enderwalk are the same (or i'd argue strengthened even) ranboo moved protectedly in front of tubbo when he and tommy had separated

forgiveness: he is willing to give people more than one chance, he is incredibly quick to judgements but for the most part he does not rely on other peoples opinions of each other to dictate the way he feels about them, he does take it into account in his overall image of them, but like with revivebur, he is willing to offer him a chance.

reciporcity to kindness: when people are kind to him, he is kind back. y'all let this slide as a moral with techno. it counts here. no im not counting it as necessarily loyalty because he is polite and kind even to those he isn't close to.

self-reliance: for better or worse ranboo does not think he needs other people to survive, in many instances he has displayed thinking he and everyone else would be better off if he were isolated. he does not want to depend too much in anyone, which can especially be seen in his desire for wealth. i think it has always been more about i dont have to rely on others, if things go south i can still survive (obviously part or it is needed something to do on stream, im applying other characteristics of ranboo to infer) but we can also see this in him retreating to himself (panic room, not telling anyone about his book being missing) when he is threatened because he believes the best way to handle it is himself

security: ranboo is incredibly driven bu his desire for safety and stability for both himself and for his loved ones. he thrives on consistency. he struggles the most when things begin to change.

difference between foil and antagonist (just for clarity cause some people have been switching up the definitions)

"an antagonist is a character who is in direct opposition to the protagonist. their actions deliberately hinder the protagonist from achieving her goal. this relationship helps build conflict and propels a story forward."

"a foil exists simply to shine the spotlight on certain traits of another character, without necessarily creating opposition or conflict."

credit: masterclass

the opposing traits/beliefs that i think will cause the most conflict between the two (ranboos will be written like this and wilburs like this to differentiate)

leader vs follower

probably the most obvious contention point, pointed out on 5/05 stream by wilbur pressing ranboo on what he stands for. wilbur wants to be in charge. but i think ranboo is how wilbur wanted people to value him. wilbur wanted to be the guy that everyone liked because he believed being liked comes with power. ranboo does not necessarily want to be well liked by everyone, but he wants to at least be neutral so he does do things in order to keep them on his side

conflict driven vs conflict averse

wilbur thrives on chaos and conflict, much like dream he is willing to manipulate situations. rqnboo does everything he possibly can to avoid it

cockiness vs insecurity

wilbur is obviously bold and arrogant. he thinks extremely highly of himself and the postions he does and could potentially hold. he is ruled by this factor and often does not think about the consquences of his rashly made decisions(thats not to say he isn't calculated or intelligent, he is, he just focuses on how things affect him rather than others)

means to an end vs no ulterior motives

all of ranboos bonds are strong because when he cares about people he does what he needs to to take care of them, they usually initiate out of instances of kindness, but he does not seem to expect anything in return. he cares about people because he loves them, nothing more nothing less. wilbur however while some of his relationships were initially based on care the motives became corrupted and its hard to say whether there are any relationships he has at this point that aren't ruled by some kind of benefit for him (my only guess for that would be phil)

similaries: paranoia, trust issues, secretiveness

ranboo and wilbur really are two sides of the same coin, yes they are opposites in a lot of aspects but despite the differences in their values orginate from the same place they jutted of in two completely different directions, they tried to solve the same issue in vastly different ways. ranboos paranoia was attempted to be solved by isolationism, while wilburs mainly tried to solve it through manipulation. ranboo pushed people away and wil tried to force them to be around. both backfired for them and caused them to retreat further into the paranoid states demonstrated by wilbur blowing up l'manburg and ranboo catastrophizing with hearing dreams voice.

I think wilbur's main contenion with ranboo resides in wilbur thinking ranboo glazes through life easily, and that they disagree on what morals means. being more confrontational does not mean you are more or less moral than another person. wilbur does not understand that differing morals does not equal none at all.

I don't think their relationship is going to act as an antagonist because while ranboo is actively keeping an eye on wilbur it wouldn't really make sense for ranboo to suddenly be more confrontational. I know a lot of people are citing the Burr vs Hamilton relationship as parallels in their dynamicI want to remind you that narrative foils are not conflicting in nature. conflict can happen. but the point of them is to highlight the differences in character traits.

likening to burr vs hamilton

burr wanted power but he wanted it to come to him vs hamilton wanting power and actively chasing it

yes this makes sense for wilbur, but it doesnt for ranboo. ranboo doesn't want power. he never has. the reason burr waits on the sidelinesnis cause he is waiting for the chance to act, but ranboo is not waiting for something to happen, in fact he would rather have the exact opposite, for things to be as uneventful as possible.

"Hamilton’s success at the expense of his personal life is countered by Burr’s relative lack of success and his happy family life. Both of these are directly due to the two’s differing goals and approaches to life. Burr and Hamilton are two side of the same coin, opposite results with the same starting conditions."

source

this is exactly what I referenced earlier between the two. ranboo cares about family, wilbur about career. while a lot of their behavior originated from a similar place, their paths rapidly diverged.

hamilton's downfall at burr's hand

i'm gonna be honest i find it extremely hard to believe that a situation will exist where wilbur waits and ranboo acts. however, if one does i still firmly believe it will be revolving around (likely in defense of) the people ranboo loves and cares about, specifically michael, tommy, tubbo. it would be where he is cementing his views of choosing people. but wilbur being hesitant is still difficult for me to think of a scenario on which he would that hesitant? for it to be his downfall?

important to note: ghostbur did also akin ranboo to burr so it is definitely possible that this dynamic is going to countinue to playout in the future

I will shut up now thank you for reading. reminder that this is just my interpretation and analysis, obviously looking at different details could lead to different conclusions. i'm super willing to discuss as long as we are both going to be respectful of each others opinions and courteous <3

[babysizedfics]

Virgil moves and talks so quietly that no one hears him (and he hates it)

virgil is naturaly very gentle in pretty much everything he does. he moves so quietly around the house because he wears socks and always walks on his tiptoes (which is an autistic trait) and he also speaks so softly hardly above a whisper unless he's laughing or yelling that he always scares people who didnt know he was right behind them.

and it sort of upsets vee. not so much that he moves silently but doesnt like that he accidentally scares people and he really doesnt like that people can't hear him when he speaks - when he was first created as a four year old he was completely mute and it took at least a year for him to finally learn to speak at five years old and even then he was still selectively mute and only semi verbal otherwise.

so he's had to deal with not being able to communicate his needs effectively a lot. he still goes mute sometimes if he is overwhelmed and when he is regressed he is semi verbal. so he feels sensitive about the fact that even when he finally CAN communicate with words most of the time, he feels like he can't do it right because he cant force himself to speak loud enough.

LOGAN

like one morning logan will be waiting for the coffee machine to fill his mug and virgil will come into the kitchen and say 'good morning.' when logan doesnt respond virgil gets nervous that maybe he did something wrong and his mama is angry with him

so he doesnt try to speak again just in case it would annoy logan and he moves around silently on his toes getting breakfast

it isnt until logan hears the fridge door open and close that he looks back and his eyes fall on vee. virgil freezes a little but logan smiles softly at him. 'good morning virgil. when did you get here?'

'uh a couple minutes ago'

'oh my apologies, i didnt hear you come in' then logan turns back to his coffee and picks up his mug.

'i said good morning' vee whispers, worried that it would sound like complaining. but logan doesnt even hear him say it so vee gives up on talking and just sits next to logan for breakfast in comfortable silence (thats underlaid by shame on his part)

PATTON AND ROMAN STORIES ARE BELOW THE CUT BC THIS GOT LONG

PATTON

patton will be doing the dishes and humming and virgil will tiptoe in and say 'hi dad' but patton doesnt hear it over the running water and keeps washing up. virgil fidgets a bit on the spot, anxious that it feels like he's eavesdropping on patton even though he isn't trying to at all

he tries a couple more times to say hi to his dad when theres less noise coming from the plates in the sink but still theres no response. so he tries to speak louder 'um dad, im behind you'

and for him it was louder than usual but for other people its more like a slightly quiet soft voice... so patton doesnt hear him still, even when he turns off the water and dries his hands.

virgils heart hammers in his chest because patton is gonna turn around and think virgil was spying on him even though virgil tried to speak to him a few times by this point. 'please dont jump' virgil whispers desperately, knowing that he's essentially talking to himself now

and of course when patton finally turns around he does jump and he yelps loudly at seeing virgil and even though virgil expected it it startles him and he flinches and his eyes immediately water (he gets really annoyed by how easily he cries sometimes)

patton sees it and quickly calms down and goes over to pull him into a hug 'oh im sorry honey, i didnt hear you come in. did i scare you?'

virgil tries to breath evenly to stop his chest from shaking when he speaks. 'i - um i tried to talk to you... a few times' virgil mumbles into his shoulder

and patton smiles a little because he's kind of soft for how gentle virgil is all over including his voice and he apologises again and kisses virgils head and they move on.

it helps virgil not feel so bad about it when it happens with pstton because he always holds him and kisses his head in apology, plus patton finds his quiet voice endearing and at least thats a positive because virgil gets fawned over by his dad a bit

ROMAN

but the worst is when it happens with roman.

roman will be in his room singing while he works on some artwork. not even that loud, just singing softly as he concentrates on his paintbrush. virgil was feeling lonely and bored and kind of jittery and anxious for no reason in his room and usually roman lets him watch when he's doing art and it calms virgils anxiety and is fun to just sit there in silence in romans company.

so he knocks on romans door gently and peeks his head in. roman is faced away from him at his easel on the other side of the room still singing under his breath a little. virgil tiptoes into the room and calls 'roman? can i watch?'

theres no response so virgil takes a deep breath and tries to speak out 'ro? is it ok if i come in?' and he thought it was loud but clearly not because roman isnt even singing at full volume and he still doesnt react to him at all.

virgil actually feels that familiar anxious swirling of dread in his tummy now. he hates not being heard when he does want to speak and he hates that it always shocks someone and that they must think he's sneaking around on purpose.

he starts clawing and pulling at the hem of his skirt and tiptoes closer, only a few feet behind roman now. he tugs his sweater sleeves down and bites his lip. roman still doesnt notice him. virgil takes a shaky breath 'roman, please' and it was actually quieter because hes so nervous now of what will happen when roman hears him and sees he has come in without permission... he hates this.

roman still doesnt show any sign of knowing virgil is there... so virgil tentatively reaches up - his hand shaking - to poke romans shoulder with one finger. 'ro?' he whispers, hating that his voice trembles

roman screams and immediately jumps and spins around. 'dear f*cking zeus! Virgil what the f*ck!' he yells, eyes wide and almost angry

and virgil can't help it. the yelling shocked him so much and roman is so much bigger and towering over him and he looks angry and now vee is shaking and his vision is blurry with tears.

roman instantly backs down, the shock on his face melting to sympathy. 'ah sh*t, i'm sorry vee...' and he puts his palette and brush down and gently places his hands on virgils arms in an attempt to comfort him 'i didnt mean to yell, im sorry.' he says gently, rubbing his hands over virgils arms 'why didnt you tell me you were here, titch?'

'i d-did!' virgil cries, his voice thick with tears 'i tri-ied to - to talk and you didn't h-h--' he cuts himself off with a strangled cry. he's just as shocked as roman by how hard he's crying

roman feels awful and immediately pulls vee into a tight hug 'no no its okay vee, shh. im really sorry i didnt hear you'

vee just sniffles into romans chest and wraps his fingers in romans sweatshirt tightly. a cry comes out thats more like a little squeak and without realising it his thumb slips into his mouth

roman pulls back from the hug to see his little brother sucking his thumb. sometimes virgil sucks his thumb as an adult for comfort so he has to check 'vee, are you feeling tiny?'

vee doesnt really understand the question and tugs at romans sweatshirt and whines, looking up at him with wet pleading eyes

and roman feels his heart break a little. he feels so guilty that he apparently scared virgil into his regression.

'okay baby, here we go' he leans down to wrap his arms around virgils back and under his thighs and hoists virgil onto his hip. then he sighs 'let's go find your papa to change you'

'bipa?' vee squeaks through his remaining tears. he sniffles again and roman feels guilt wash over him again

'yeah, clever baby, papa's gonna get you a diaper' he whispers and wipes his thumb under vees eye to catch another falling tear

vee whimpers quietly and buries his face on romans shoulder so roman takes it as a prompt to start moving and carrying virgil out of his room to find patton

roman really would have liked for adult virgil to watch him paint but he thinks its all his fault for yelling that vee regressed from fear. so he decides painting can wait, he wants to make it up to his brother with lots of cuddes and playing games to make the baby giggle for the rest of the day