#bc we barely had ANYTHING
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THE JIMMY TWO SHOES PILOT IS REAL??? HOLY SHIT
it’s so surreal to see screenshots that’ve made the rounds for years be animated… the voice and design differences too!!!
i guess i'm also surprised by how similar it is to what we got?? there's no explicit gore or darker themes or anything... even the hell part is kinda vague lol
#jimmy two shoes#we thought it was only a bunch of animation tests for the longest time#but its REAL#im tweaking#almost 2 decades of searching and speculation and FINALLY#2025 might be the best year#i liked the more chill common sense beezy#i remember someone saying he didn't exist in the pilot but he's there!!#the jimmy x heloise was also really strong... just like i was hoping for hehe#the way she was clinging to him (for manipulative effect) and jimmy basically going “i can fix her”#he wasn't as oblivious as i thought he'd be tho#not that he ever was#sorry i can't help but compare it to the pilot fic by darkroseblast#that was my only basis for the pilot for years lmao#bc we barely had ANYTHING#my thoughts are disjointed so i'm rambling in the tags#i'm just so happy GRAHHHHH
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idk how but somehow ive ended up on the planning committee for my town's pride celebration this year and so far all i've learned is that there are a startling number of gen x lesbians living in the midwest and that sometimes you do in fact need to invite a cop to pride, just in case the neo nazis and kkk show up in your deep red small town.
#like do i think the local police *actually* like and support us? obviously not.#but there is something to be said about getting to them before the hate groups can u feel me.#plus we know of One Specific Officer on the local force who has been very supportive of the anti-Trump protests we've been organizing#so hopefully we can get him to be our on-site security you feel me#i live in an area that is uh. not safe to be openly queer in. so we are trying to be cautious about it and avoid backlash#this town hasnt had pride in a few years bc it got too dangerous#but we are determined to make it happen this time bc the local queer community desperately needs this.#so! onward we go!#anyway if u were wondering why ive barely posted anything lately. this is why 🫡
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guess who got STRAIGHT A'S FOR THEIR FINAL SEMESTERRRRRRRRRRRR
4.0 GPA FOR THE SEMESTER, BABYYYYYYYYYYY
this raised my overall GPA to a 3.12. which it's a little sad that i'd been struggling so much prior to this past year (from unmedicated adhd & having to work a fucking job while in school) bc i probably Could have had a really high overall GPA. this past year proved that i *can* be a good college student. but Oh Well. i can be proud of what i've accomplished in this past year at least. and i can be proud of going from academic probation a year ago to getting straight A's in my final semester of college. and managing to raise my GPA up to a 3.12. still an accomplishment!!!
#speculation nation#i got on academic probation bc i did just a Godawful job on my last semester prior to this school year#which was. spring 2023. my focus just fucking tanked Completely (due to me getting absolutely Slammed with my 3gun hyperfixation)#i only passed those classes on a technicality. aka i got like. barely a C in one i think? and a D in the other.#which normally isn't good enough to count but since it wasnt a prerequisite for anything my advisor was oh so niceys to me#and made an exception. so it did count for my degree after all.#but bc i did So fucking bad they were just like 'we gotta watch u' and there i remained until i went back to school last year.#bc i took a year off due to grief w/e lol. did some soul searching. came into some money. got on adhd meds. turned my life around.#and now i am boasting a fuckin 4.0 GPA for my final semester. WAHOO!!!!!!!#feels so nice. only the second time ive. ever? gotten straight A's. i think.#i got them one semester of my junior year of high school bc i got motivated by the studying in p4 lol#couldnt keep it up. it fuckin wrecked me. went back to my normal As and Bs for the remainder of high school#BUT it was the perfect time to have Gotten straight As. bc it probably helped me get accepted into college lol#and NOW..... OVER 10 YEARS LATER.......... i have gotten straight As for the first time in college. WAHOOOOOOOO#college is just another fuckin kind of beast. good god. i had to nearly break my back to keep up with this#helped that i only had 3 classes of actual schoolwork too. tho orchestra and bowling certainly kept me busy lol#still. gonna just bask in this for a bit. i am very very proud.
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I'm opening commissions again as things have been getting financially tight once more but I want to continue my education.
I'll be taking 5 slots at a time, which I will be updating via my bio!! So keep watch of that :]
For inquiries, feel free to dm me on tumblr, instagram or email me at [email protected]
ADDITIONAL NOTE: Payment can be half upfront, then the rest of the payment after the commission is done.
#commissions open#digital art#artists on tumblr#sketch#maya fey#ace attorney#comics#comic#mi art stuff#art#fanart#had to bust out my sona again yk its getting real /j#okay normal tags out of the way. time to yap#i am tentatively adding the comic option bc i think we all know i post comics often#depending on how well-received it will be.. i'll see if i will keep it or not#i know the price is a bit high but its just that price for 4 b&w panels with two or more characters so thats a fair price methinks#that being said#this will be the last time i'll recreate my sheets bc i'm content with how my art looks like now#(despite barely posting but i promise i've been practicing a lot in my free time)#anyway feel free to dm me to ask about anything regarding this!!!!#thats all from me for now !!! thank you tag readers mwa heres a bunch of sandwiches and bread for u🥪🍞🥯🥖🥐🍞🥪
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just found your blog and having a blast scrolling through it thank you for sharing your very correct opinions with the world, very satisfying. now i'm curious (and sorry if you've talked about it before) what do you think of shisui?

basically
#to go into depth#shisui is a character that brings a new kevel of anger to me#and its not even towards Him fully because if we go by canon shisui is almost non existent#you blink and you missed his presence in the story completely#AND YET fandom and nrt video game had turned him into the most important guy ever 😭#dudebros dickride the hell out of him only bc a videogame and itachi stans latched onto his character bc they needed an itachi yaoi ship to#proyect and since shisui in canon barely is there they can make an entire personality for him as itachi’s bf its perfect#the fact that he’s just so loved and worshipped for not doing anything is just so hhhhh#“if shisui was in the war arc he wouldve wom against madara” BY DOING WHAT EXACTLY killing himself in fromt of him to change the course of#his life??!!#sorry i went overboard i just hhhh he’s too overhyped#also dont apologize. i apologize instead if maybe u expected that i didnt hate him#ask
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maybe the real Viktor arcane season 2 character arc were the friends we made along the way
#I’m sorry but they relied way too heavily on off screen implications of things happening and telling instead of showing for his arc#we literally barely saw anything of what he had to go through to get to any of the places where he was in the season#idk maybe I need to rewatch to understand better but due to the rushed pacing and severe lack of screen time I feel he didn’t get enough#nuance and substantial characterisation that he truly deserved this season#like dude barely got to machine his herald before the writers decided it was time to wrap up and have a 2 min redemption arc😭#let that man be full of RAGE let him be FERAL let him have an UGLY GROTESQUE MAN MADE MACHINE TRANSFORMATION#GOD FORBID A MAN COMPREHENDS THE HORRORS HE’S WITNESSED!!#I love season 1 but season 2#Rn it’s a 6.5/10 for me while s1 was a 9 or 10/10#maybe I need to rewatch to see if any of the other characters got it better than he did I mean I LOVED ekko jayce and jinx this season#but Viktor Mel and sky#they got fumbled so hard they deserved so much better imo sorry#yapping#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane critical#Might delete later idk this rant feels deeply unserious and I’m also sleep deprived so maybe my takes aren’t the best#Living up to my name as the world’s first elderly teenage girl bc I need a grandpa level nap GOD#my post
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Your recent update made me wonder about something. I don’t know how much you know about this but wanted to try asking anyway. Hopefully this makes sense? Why would the English translation choose to censor things? I assume translations are being done in America where queer things are slowly becoming more accepted but is that a factor? Are the translators themselves changing certain things due to their own biases? I don’t know who they are and don’t want to assume anything about them, but I can’t help wondering if that’s part of the reason? Or is it because of something like, for example, sometimes movies or TV shows have certain content removed based on where it’s being aired, so is it something like that? Is the game being released in regions where queer content is banned or removed? Now that I wrote it, I feel like this is the most likely answer but what do you think? I basically just rambled in your ask my bad. Also, do you know if the Korean and/or Taiwan servers have censorship too?
oh there's more than just the Asahi thing and i have mentioned it in passing before but i'll cover it properly here. "the miles i fell in love with is so cool" -> "it was so cool! i guess that's miles for you" is definitely the biggest example though.
First off, a minor thing. it doesn't really happen anymore but in the earlier translations they quite often use words other than partner, like "pals" and "buds", in the VBS story. Probably one of the best examples of this would be An and Kohane's 3rd kizuna title, which the JP name was often fan-translated as "Making each other better" or "Raising each other up", and is called "Two supportive pals" on EN. Which does have the same meaning but the "pals" seems so unneccesary when they could've used partners. The original text is Takameau futari, the first part means "to raise" or "to lift" and futari means "two people" or "a pair/couple". So it technically is a good enough translation but using pals when partners would be more accurate to canon just seems.. off.
I’m assuming their avoidance of the word partner is because it could easily be misinterpreted as romantic, but they seem to have moved on from that at this point.
There's also THE POWER OF UNITY where they switch out "love" (daisuki) for "cares about a lot" when KAITO is comparing the relationship between Arata and Souma to Akito and Toya. Daisuki literally means "likes a lot" so often you'll see people translate it as love, though likes a lot is still valid. "Cares about" is not a direct translation but definitely can still convey the same meaning, so again instance of valid localisation it just seems like an odd choice when using love would've conveyed the exact same meaning and been more true to the original.
Then you've got another instance of them not translating daisuki correctly in Dear Me, As I Was Back Then (sorry this one is a wiki screenshot my phone died). This is worse. Like I guess if you really want then it does have a close enough meaning to the original. Like I guess daisuki meaning "like a lot" or "love" could be localised as "you're the best" if you really wanted it too. But even then, the line before this is "I'm gonna show just how much I admire her!". Minori's shout of "I LOVE YOUUU" from the original would be way more fitting here. "You're the best" feels too casual and buddy-buddy - even if Minori didn't know Haruka at this point, Haruka still had a big impact on her life and imo "I love you" would be the best to use here.
There’s also this one from Walk on and on that removes one key thing. In the original, Toya says something more along the lines of “I was able to make this track because I want to continue to be a partner who can stand shoulder-to-shoulder with you from now on and always”. This is a bit more similar to the Asahi incident in that they’ve restructured the sentence to make it two, adding in the thing about performing which isn’t even there originally, and replacing “korekara saki mo zutto” with “keep singing with you”. And “keep singing with you” still works, but it’s much more toned down, let’s say. You know what really is odd about this translation though? If the quote I put seems familiar, it’s because it’s also the name of Toya’s event card. Kinda odd they omitted that from the story then, huh? The thing is the translation of the card is very accurate so removing it from the story starts to seem intentional, especially when everything around it is accurately translated like with the Asahi incident. Also doing this removes the fact that the card name references the story so what the hell are you doing EN? It's the same sentence, if you can translate it correctly on the card you can translate it correctly in the story.
There's definitely more than this, this is just what came to mind first and I don't want to make this post too long.
These were certainly... choices. Especially with the ones that avoid translating daisuki as love because they do translate as that on other occasions, most frequently with An and Kohane. I'm assuming the reason they omitted it with the guys is because it's far harder to pass off guys saying that they love each other as platonic because societal expectations or whatever, but I'm actually surprised by the change to Dear Me because normally they're pretty good with Minori and Haruka usually. Like they've translated daisuki correctly for them before and leave in everything else that indicates Minori has a crush on Haruka, so why not this line?
I'm tempted to say that they just change the things that they think are too hard to safely pass off as platonic, but then again they left all of the unsubtle ship teasing in Buddy Funny Spend Time, which has a lot of focus on Minori and Haruka's relationship (and they even added in Haruka saying that Minori makes her heart tickle in her card story), so I'm genuinely not sure why they left that in but then changed one instance of Minori saying she loves Haruka which doesn't even have to be interpreted romantically. Like what is the limit here? An can say she's going on a date (with Kohane) and the WEG regulars can ask who she's been seeing, but Asahi can say he fell in love with Tsukasa's character and it gets removed. Both of them have romantic connotation. The only thing I can think of is that An's comes from a whole card story and event, but Asahi's is one line that's easy to remove. Same with Toya saying he wants to stay with Akito forever.
In other words, it's a mess and I don't think any of what I just wrote is coherent either.
Interpret all of this however you will at the end of the day it’s all just ship tease which is up to interpretation anyway. Except the Asahi thing. That one is a censor.
Oh and the KR and TW servers don’t do this.
#i got this one peer reviewed on both my main account and with an irl who doesn't know anything about the game.#oh because someone will probably bring up the hiraga gennai 1koma i don't consider that one a censor#that one's definitely a localisation bc barely any players would get the joke since gennai isn't well known in the EN server regions#there's a whole discussion to be had over the fact they did completely change the joke and the context which we actually have had before#it was rui's birthday post if you go through my rui tag you can find it.#asks#mod talks#apologies for the quality on this one it's 1am right now for me
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Clemont is just really funny in general i think. he's just like that, realistically theres so much to unpack about him;
he made an entire invention where he spoke to the mayor and was spread out across the town of the uni he was in which he got in at the age of maybe like 8.
he's a gym leader. he lost his gym to his invention,
there was the slightest chance he could've been mind controlled.
his bag is a bag of holding
he can't run
his entire mental state is the way it is because of a single mistake that wasn't even his fault
There's so much to unpack about him and the creators were like; "yeah anyways!"
okay but seriously, i think we as a fandom neglect the fact that if it wasn't for Clemont's anxious(???) paranoid(???) quick thinking(???) overly prepared(???) he probably he would've gotten mind controlled. like what was up with that.
-⚡(you can call me clem anon! its also just really funny and the fact that i've so far only exclusively talked about him makes it even funnier. electric anon is okay too !)
Clemont is his own bag of holding lol, there really is SO MUCH with him and I'm shaking you on the shoulders rn clem nonnie. Please. How is it possible that there is so much to him as it is. I need to study him under a microscope.
With the first point, that always made me laugh in a way lol. Him at the age of possibly eight created a power source slash Electric Pokemon recharger for a whole town/city. The mayor has noticed his efforts. This is before he is a Gym Leader, and this is the place where he made the promise to Shinx (a promise that he broke, not by any fault of his own, but by the very thing that brought them together in the first place).
The way he actually just straight up lived in Prism Tower, or at least that's how it felt, along with Bonnie. Their father is in the same city with a house but they won't bother with that and he doesn't bother them until they are MIA for at the very least a few weeks if not months. His reasoning for being a Gym Leader is to wield Electric Types from every region and become an Electric-Type Trainer that the world has never seen. The fact that he can be this ambitious with battling gets me (and also his learning from school carrying over c':)
His bag is also a mechanical marvel (not Volcanion, sorry). His Aipom Arm has only malfunctioned once (1 time), and he's easily able to lift Bonnie into the air with it. Also we never see this beyond the first ep but it has an inflatable airbag??? That is actually safe and comfortable to land on even with the everything in his bag as it is.
Even after the whole series and after everything they've ever went through, he still cannot run. Only one time he has ever sprinted ahead (in this realm/dimension) and that was to get to a festival about Zapdos of all Pokemon (and maybe that inventing fair as well??). No one comments on it beyond that one moment. He's also tried to make shoes to help him go up hills quicker but he never tried that one again lol (he forgot he even had it until Serena mentions the monorail, in which also, wow. this gang i swear).
That's actually one of the saddest parts (and something I can totally relate with). The way that we see him so happy and open with Shinx beforehand, ready to learn and be hands on and playing outside even with all the work that he had. And then we hear about how he lost his Gym, how his Pokemon disregard his words and his invention doesn't see him as worthy or strong enough, and it really is him just living out a nightmare of his own making in a way. His fear from back then keeps haunting him with the mistakes that he makes now, and even after meeting with Luxio again you can see the way he just... accepts that he's no longer wanted or forgiven. He's fine with it. He rather everyone have a better life than he does. Just,, he needs a hug. Lots of them.
HELP PLS you've said exactly what I've been thinking off this whole time!! Geez, I thought I was alone in thinking that we brush off whatever happened to Clemont in 'The Needs of Many!' like I get that we lose Greninja, but hello? He got straight-up kidnapped right in front of our eyes! He was going to be made into a superhuman (which has some very very worrying connotations beyond what is already happening). He too was blasted by the Mega Evo Energy, and even if he did resist the mind control, there's got to be other effects as well. If his friends weren't OP and reckless as they were he would've actually been carted away to who knows where and it would've been a matter of time until his preventive measures were found out. And the way he already had a counter against it, against the beam specifically (and for it to be able to work without any issues) is also so sad and worrying in a way?? It's definitely paranoia to me, it was very specific (more than usual, anyways), small enough to hide and easy enough for him to grab. Poor boy :(( I need to just sit down and think every time I remember this is an ep that exists because they just went ham with it, didn't they??
#wooo clem (/electric) anon it is!! such a powerful title btw you've just claimed ownership of a whole character lol :P#also 'so far'?? this means that you may go on to branch out beyond clem and that scares as well as intrigues me /lh :3c#apparently bonnie knew that he evolved heliolisk with a sun stone but hasn't seen evo until the spewpa ep gets me#clem also has that ds map thing that looks very similar to what cilan had i think#i mean he's also quick-thinking and overly prepared but he did not miss a beat with the whole thing#i'm constantly thinking of this ep btw. easily one of the strangest and scariest imo#find it also weird bc of course it's adapting the games with xerosic trying to make a superhuman post-xy#but (a) he hates clem and it was targetted (b) obvs the beam and (c) no looker (or emma) :(#but ig the hardest part for me is just that the anime makes xerosic completely irredemable. he's down bad for lys's ambitions#while in the games he's just there to be there. instead it's malva who's all for lysandre and his dreams (yeah they swapped)#i have no idea if i should keep them anime-wise (which means so much tweaking! and also very hard to get emma in then)#or lean more game-wise. because they are very much opposites#but also old men having beef with clem is very funny lol#like i still remember dark clembot guy. what was his deal?? i mean i doubt many ppl even know anything about it#anyways back to clem. i find that his reason to be a gym leader to be a lot more self-serving than i would've expected#yeah he wants to be good as a trainer but what about other trainers? being a gym leader means testing them#not just testing yourself. if he really wanted that he could've just struck out on his own#but it is easier to stay in one place and let challengers come to you#still. makes sense why he burnt out so easily on that end. and made a robot to fixate on challengers in such a way too#to make up for his own disinterest in them#LOOK i can get to the whole clembot thing later. i'm like 3 fics away then you can see me all ramble to death about it#because i've got a million thoughts on it#sadly the whole luxio ep is going to be a million light years away :/#we don't get much fo a timeline for clem so we don't know much about him#but presumably he got all of his gym mons after leaving shinx#and also at some point in his life he helped make the power plant???#i can never get out of my head how he just dives in front of ash to take luxio's thunder fang point-blank#(i mean he's learning off ash but i don't think that's the right thing to learn heh)#and the way he tells her 'i'll be your grounding' like AUGH? my heart? is there even a point? (the way he'll take anything from her)#anyways got too many thoughts about him. have barely scatched the surface as it is lol
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i hope the next animal crossing game doesnt have gradual updates the way new horizons did. if it does i will probably not play it until all the updates r out because new horizons would have been wayyy more enjoyable and had way more longevity if everything was in it from launch instead of one single feature being added like every 2 months whos idea was that. or possibly i will not play the next animal crossing at all bc i dont want to pay one million pounds for a switch 2
#if cooking and farming had been in nh at launch that would have been so sick but as it is i have barely done any of that stuff bc i was#already sick of the game by the time they came out#the only thing i think should be in updates is the seasonal events like it was quite cool that everyone got to experience the christmas#halloween etc stuff at the same time w/o everything being already known from time travelling. anything else is unnecessary just put it in#the game when it comes out why do we need an update for basic launch features from previous games
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yall help

#sophia has a crush 🫶🏻#help#sophia is undergoing an existential crisis#overthinking this#not gonna say anything bc i don’t think he could like me back 😢#the way i haven’t had a crush like this in like 3 years 💀#im not okay#girlhood#im just a girl#sophia yaps a lot#sophia yaps#crush#situationships#he’s like barely a guy friend bc we never talk outside of my small ass polish school class#^and it would be really awkward if i made it awkward#im dying
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honestly i think my only beef w mouthwashing and why it didnt hit for me is i was bored by the fixation on jimmy and curly. its a game abt anyas assault but shes barely in the game at all. her trauma is a prop to explore these male chracters complex relationship which i get yes is to illustrate how people enable harm doers and abusers but like. i dont rlly care that curly enabled jimmy bc he liked him and they were BFFsFL u kno like. their story was boring. anya didnt feel like a person and ahe didnt feel nearly as fleshed out as the others. i kept forgetting her name and calling her shelly duvall but a lot of her story happens off screen. which isnt to say i wanted her assault on screen its more to say why isnt she anything outside of her trauma? shes not nearly as humanized or fleshed out as the others and we r fixated on the abuser and whats going thru his mind and how the other men enabled him to go as far as he did. i think that we couldve even had a meaningful narrative about that while still treating anya like a human and still letting her be more of a character and less of a prop to talk abt sexual assault. am i making sense???
#i dont blame writers for fans reception of a game but i do think that this aspect of the writing contributed to the way that fans-#completely sidestepped anya to fixate on jimmy and curly. bc anya had barely anything interesting going for her but curly and jimmy r fully#realized and fleshed out characters#idk im tired of media abt men who are abusers that uses Women as a prop and reduces them to nothing but a victim bc no one is adding-#anything new to this conversation and its not clicking w audiences clearly 💀 bc the fan reception of mouthwashing pissed me OFFF#also the polly thing just didnt rlly work for me it was so fnaf ripoff level trope of the mascot and the unbearable stealth sequence#it just needed to be a little more refined it felt like an unfinished game lol#i still like mouthwashing for what it is and what we see of anyas story rlly resonates w me but shes still reduced to a victim just so we c#talk abt curly and jimmys Complex Relationship 🙄 and its like bitch i do not give a fuck#i wish we had more anya povs to explore her relationship w curly more too bc tht wldve been interesting unpacking all that as it relates to#anya and her connection w curly and how that complicates things etcetcetc whatever#im done now#stazi speaks
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does anyone have like. things to say/show to a little who is in Emotional Distress and can't get out of it (he's like 9 and like,,,,, deeply traumatized,, and he hasn't been able to calm down for several days)
#we got him to eat some mashed potatoes today and he's okay with like. two entire headmates being around him#he won't even accept comfort from his initial caretaker in the system he's clinging to taryn and reagan instead#but like other than that tiny amount of progress he's still. fucked up#it's been about a week of this and today is the first day he's accepted a hug#he's just terrified of everything and nearly catatonic from the level of emotional distress#like not speaking barely moving only slightly reacting to anything#only communicating in nods and shrugs#we're all so worried but we haven't had a little in front in so long let alone a traumatized little#the last pair of littles we've had in front were two very emotionally sound and energetic little boys which are different to deal with#they were two little chaos gremlins that's a very different type of parenting than for a child who doesn't trust adults much#he only trusts taryn and reagan because they've helped him with stuff that made him feel more safe#like helping set up his bedroom in headspace or enforcing his boundaries with other headmates#and because both of them are mothers so they know a little more about how to care for children compared to others in headspace#taryn got him a unicorn plushie at goodwill recently and it's been his only comfort item all week#we also would like suggestions for names for her bc we're bad at naming plushies but that's less important
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#sharing my opinions about this show (or anything really) gives me so much anxiety#especially when my opinions are negative#which is why i barely ever do it djfdjdfs i'm like what if i piss off everyone and they block me and set my blog on fire#and i honestly have no sense of self and usually my opinions change if people disagree#im trying to work on it bc i cant really live like this#which is why i've started to share more things on here but dear god it's terrifying#i saw that i had a few messages in my inbox and i was like here we go it's all my mutuals telling me i suck#luckily it was just a few pornbots<3#still it's less scary here because i can always delete a post and i would rather piss off a few anons than the actual people in my life lol#and when i went to therapy sharing my opinions and stading my ground was one of the things she wanted me to work on#but im kinda happy that i have small blog because i think i would have a heart attack if more people interacted with my posts lmao
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my sister has been home from school for 4 days and spent all 4 with her boyfriend, it’s so over

#and she looks at me like i’m making no sense when i say she’s barely home#like i work all 5 days this week and studying all 5 nights#weekends are all we get bro#this man didn’t even do anything but i’m blowing him up with my mind#who said that#told her she had to be home at 4:30 yesterday bc we had a dinner to get to and my cousin watched out the window when she says she showed up#5 mins earlier and sat in his car until 4:30 on the dot like omfg now i’m just annoyed#also annoyed bc she fucking gutted my dresser drawers + replaced it with her clothes + put mine in the BASEMENT😭
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omw to school now chat!! 😸
#Mini vent bc im not ok haha:#So i literally cant stop shaking and ws barely able to breathe when i ws getting ready + ws hyperventilating the whole time.#Feel about a split second away from starting to cry again.#Mother left like 5 minutes before the taxi ws meant to get here bc she had to bring cat to the vet.#So she ws js like 'sorry i cant help :[ oh btw you gotta get ur shit together in <5min for school bye' which. Um. Yeah.#So i had about 3 minutes of breakdown time before i had to get my shit together and now i gotta sit through 6 hours of random bs probably w#a bunch of catch up work bc i wasnt in last week when we properly went back. So ive missed like 3 days worth of lessons.#So 6 hours worth of random bs + extra catch up work (besides the fact im also behind in a bunch of shit anyways bc i joined the class late.#& i'll probably have a thousand and one teachers 'checking on' me. All they want to hear is just another fucking lie of me saying im ok bc#Im too much of a fucking burden to not be. Even if i say im not ok the most ill probably fucking get is a shitty cup of tea and 5 minutes t#sit in the hall being gawked at for having the audacity to not be ok.#Spooks isnt in today. My other friend might be? Crimson might be? And Star might be? So idfk.#I dont want to make fake fucking conversation i dont really want to talk ever or do anything.#I dont feel able to exist right now. But i cant not?? So! Hn. Guess its fucking school instead.#Um. Yeah. Sorry?( I guess? Not really.) For this chat.#See you guys later.
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my mom was just talking about this woman (+100 yrs old) from the village the other day, and today she dies...
#z xarre#not that i think it means anything. but just the fact that we barely mentioned her and the one day we do... lol#i remember her showing my aunt and i her entire house one time when we were going to the pool#and like. showing an entire house in my village can be. an hour+ long affair. on the account of the having built the house#on the side of a hill. which means theres like 5 floors. i swear that house had that many floors. it seemed like it never ended.#all i wanted was to go to the pool at that time. but looking back i wish i could remember more abt that house bc it was. SO. BIG!!!
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