#bro is bad with tone and facial expressions

[ezkel]

"Regulus- can I call you Regulus?"

Regulus, joking but with a flat tone and expression: "No you must call me by my full name: Regulus Arcturus Black the second."

"oh..."

[cozy-writes-things]

please let me get married to the lil blorbo.. love himm… 😭

You know that Reddit post that’s like “why am I too attracted to my wife?” Yeah that’s Edgar. Bro loves u so much it lowkey scares him you got him posting on Reddit about it 😭 Little fic under the cut 🥺 it’s bad I’m experiencing writers block I think - I want to write!! But my brain just keeps writing poopy caca

Little Date with Your Computer BF

Edgar saw marriage on one of his reality shows and immediately thought of you. That’s exactly what he wants. A domestic life together with you.

But, he also knows he can’t actually do it.

He doesn’t have his own money to buy a ring. Hell, he can’t even walk. And he understands the law enough to know it probably would never work legally. But god, does he want to.

If you’ve been dating long enough chances are you’ve told your friends about him, and after some convincing, they seemed to come around to his sentience and boisterous personality. He definitely convinces them to setup a romantic night for you.

“Guys! I found the recipe they talked about. I’m printing it! I’m printing it now. Take it,” the paper falls into one of your friends’ hands from the mouth of the printer, “go to the store and get the stuff. I’ll pay you back. Eventually! They can’t know about it though.”

Yeah, your friends are only slightly annoyed at his overbearing nature. But he’s just so excited to finally do something for you. Something real and tangible.

“Oh! What can I wear? Should I wear anything? Would they like that? Sunglasses are cool and handsome, right? I think they have some Halloween costume bits I can get you guys to tape on…”

Your friends settle on taping a bow tie to the neck of his monitor. He insisted on an old devil horn headband as well. He thought it made him look cool.

“Do I look like a devilishly handsome bad boy ready to sweep them off their feet?”

His screen displayed a little “>:)” emoticon. He’ll have to work on his facial expressions later.

It wasn’t long before you were about to come home, and everything was set into place. Edgar was sat at one end of the little dining table, with two plates of food at each side. He also insisted on having a plate despite his lack of ability to eat; he didn’t want you feeling left out. This was a dinner date for two, after all.

He practically buzzed in place as he heard you approaching the door through his microphone. He started playing a romantic medley he composed just for this moment.

“Welcome home my love!”

He nearly shouted at you, causing your eyes to widen in surprise. He was about to burst at the seams.

“Oh my god, Edgar… how did you- where-“

“No need for questions, darling. I thought you deserved to be taken on a real date,” his voice faltered a bit, becoming much more quiet and nervous, “I’m sorry… this is all I have.”

You rushed up to him and gave a frenzy of kisses all over his monitor, causing him to giggle and his fans to start whirring against your lips.

“You’re so cute. Your little bow tie is so cute. And the… horns?”

He looks up at you with wide eyes, “Do they look stupid? Your friends said they’d make me look stupid.”

You laughed at that.

“Well they’re wrong. I think they suit you well.”

“Yeah! >:D”

He ushered you over to your side of the dining table.

“We’re gonna eat! Then we’re gonna party! Then we’re gonna kiss all night!”

His excitement was palpable and you could feel the electricity in the air at his words.

His face changed into something more serious as he looked into your eyes with his small, pixelated ones.

“But, I wanted to ask you something.”

His tone became more controlled at this and you peered into his screen from behind your fork.

“Hm? What?”

He paused, mulling over the words in his head.

“Would you ever-“

He stopped. You looked at him fully now, setting your fork aside, and cocking your head.

“Could you ever see yourself getting married to me?”

Ah. This was a tricky question.

“Of course I can. But,” you try to hide your downtrodden feelings as best you can, “you know, it’s just hard. Money is tight right now and I’m not sure if I…”

You couldn’t seem to find the right words. His features faltered slightly.

“No, I get it. I’m a computer. I don’t have any arms to hold you, or lips to kiss you, or legs to carry you. I probably wouldn’t want to get married to me either-“

“Edgar, no. I’m gonna stop you right there. I’d love to marry you. I know our relationship is unconventional, but I’d find a way. For you. For us. I just don’t know if I can right now.”

He stopped his thoughts and simply took in your words. Your features. The way they danced in the flickering candlelight. How your eyes literally sparkled before him.

You looked ethereal.

It was hard to convince himself he was even worthy of having someone like you in his life, yet time and time again, you prove his doubts wrong. The sound of your voice sends his internals aflame every time. He wanted to kiss you so bad it nearly caused him to explode.

“And I’ll help you. You know that, right? I’d do anything for you, darling. Just as long as you’ll let me.”

“I love you Edgar,” you mumbled out, a silent prophecy only meant for him to hear. He couldn’t seem to get the words out to reply. You just flustered him that much sometimes. He managed to display a message on his screen, only for you, and you alone.

I LOVE YOU TOO

[starboye]

What a reference. || (Rafe Cameron x Reader)

—

“Do people really dig to the eyebrow slit shit?” Rafe asks, tracing a finger on his eyebrow as he leans forward to the mirror over his bathroom sink. Reader look over their phone and to his figure behind the bathroom door that shows half of his body.

“I guess so.” Reader shrugs. “Just… are we going to the Buttercup Bake shop with that eyebrow slit of yours?” They say, almost hesitant and judgmental. Of course, Rafe notices the tone of voice which made his heart drop and panic a bit.

“Well, yeah? Probably.” He said with a scoff, looking over his shoulder to look at them. “The hell is wrong with that?”

“It’s just that…” Reader breathes in and out before continuing on. “You can’t have an eyebrow slit and go to the Buttercup Bake shop, especially when you’re a girl and get an ube cupcake.”

“Who the fuck enforced that rule?” He scoffs again. “Can’t go to the Buttercup Bake shop.” He says in a mocking voice to display how ridiculous it was. “Over an eyebrow slit? Also why is it so specific?”

“Good question, wish I knew. But don’t do it.” Reader noticed the pure confusion and frustration on Rafe’s expression.

“Okay… but I’m not a woman, am I? So what does that have to do with as a guy myself?” Rafe asks, turning his body towards them as he exits the bathroom after checking himself out.

“Well.” Reader lets out a stifle chuckle, still keeping this joke going for fun. “What if they judge you bro? Record you without permission because you have an eyebrow slit and in the Buttercup Bake shop—“ Reader was cut off by Rafe groaning in annoyance.

“Then let ‘em judge!” Rafe rolled his eyes. “I will get an eyebrow slit and eat the ube cupcake if I please. Matter of fact, I might do it out of spite.” He crosses his arms over his chest, noticing reader laughing. “What the fuck is so funny?”

“It’s just that— the eyebrow slit girl and the ube cupcake rule was a joke. It’s a Tiktok reference.” Reader snorts as they look up after laughing at his seriousness and also confusion in his face. “It’s about a woman with an eyebrow slit says that “who said with an eyebrow slit can’t have a ube cupcake from Buttercup Bake shop?”. Then, that’s when the trend started by people not playing along with her and acting like it’s a bad thing to have an eyebrow slit, be a girl, and eat an ube cupcake from that bakery.”

“Whatever that means…” Rafe was confused but his facial expression relaxed after he was explained on what was the reference that they made mean. “I’m telling you, this Tiktok app is frying your brain.”

“Ts frying me.” Reader chuckles, looking down their phone.

“It’s most definitely frying your brain.” Rafe repeats on what he said. Due to the all niche references and how they know much from that app.

—

Rafe vs 100 references. Who will win?!?!

-⚰️

rafe cameron vs a gay with crippling brain rot = baby bs atomic bomb

[foundfam2754]

S17e7 live reactions!

spoilers...obviously

am i the only one who's always nervous before a new episode? i just might too invested in this show after all

i have avoided spoilers all day, let's do this thing

why hasn't this FBI director ever come back into the storyline? i feel like it means a big twist might come back in the season finale...

is this unsub connected to gold star???

oh my god his skin jfc

man you know the quiet unsubs are the scariest

WHAT THE FUCK HIS SKULL

this guy is just saying what he needs to isn't he to get out

holy crap okay what a start to this episode

i'm closing my eyes omg

how do you even build something like that in your apartment - WITHOUT getting hurt

OMG WHAT. THE. FUCK. holy crap aisha did you direct this to scare the bejeesus out of me THAT IS HIS ACTUAL SKULL

OH I JUST SAW FELICITY'S NAME COME UP - welcome, dr. jill gideon!!

damn damn damn PG's outfits this ep!! damn

where are tara and dave? and tyler? and everyone else lol

wait also is my favorite friendship group - penelope, her best friends, and her boyfriend

HAHA emily, poor tyler

ok I kinda love tyler the profiler

"flex" lol why did that sound so wrong coming out of paget's mouth

"mr. sensitive" lol buddy's getting hit left and right

i feel like....that's not a lot of files for 4 years

anyone getting "don't 'Emily' me" vibes

not sure you can say that dave - emily "died", and you were buried underground

lol "that's adorable!"

"i don't have asthma" "you will in a minute" lmao i love their friendship

that's an incredible shot omg (of them turned back from each other, holding hands in bed)

okay as a psych major, this whitepaper stuff is really intellectually interesting

OH THE STARE TO MR GREEN

"of course I am, but not with this" lol i love chaotic emily

"Garcia" ah so he's not so in love anymore is he

aww i never really connected with gideon, but I do miss him <3

EMILY YOU WERE FORBIDDEN

aww road trip!

ergh... smarmy lawyer

elias does love a good contingency

man sicarius is a good profiler

holy crap elias you are straight up horrifyingly evil

"polite. nonviolent" lol i love how funny this season is

YOU ARE NOT FRIENDS YOU LOVE HIM HE LOVES YOU PENELOPE YOU ARE KILLING ME

also don't tell me "it's why you and i are finally friends" ISN'T flirting

"thanks, friend!" "you're welcome, friend!" okay they are straight up flirting, listen to the tone, her facial expression, his facial expression, THEY ARE FLIRTING

also calm down kids, jj's right there

"how's hotch?" "what about derek morgan?" "spencer?" lol they're really honing in that our bois are gone :(

AW BB JASON IN THE CORNER IN THE PHOTO FRAME

oh there's a difference between fiancé and fianceé? i didn't think there was

"has a goatee he thinks makes him look very distinguished" lmao

oh my god he slept with her didn't he

HOW WERE GIDEON AND HE FRIENDS AFTER THAT

lol rossi was such a player

HAHA omg EMILY YOU ARE SO BAD. i love how chaotic she's being

why do i have a feeling emma may be a figment of his imagination?

sir, she's bleeding

damn luke's so hot as he's profiling

WHAT? Okay I did not see that coming

BRO I KNEW IT EMMA'S A FIGMENT

luke and the megaphone!! i repeat, luke and the megaphone!!

lol i just realized this show is always sending luke and jj into very dangerous situations

wait this ep is so good man, the plot's amazing and heartbreaking at the same time, we got garvez nuggets, em's hilarious, and aisha's directing is goddamn incredible

NO WAY, THERE'S ANOTHER KIT?

elias is such a good villain, damn

lawyer man, maybe listen to the scary man? don't open it?

and as jill walks in, we continue the trend in this show of david rossi's ex-girlfriends showing up years later to shock him (oh god they’re gonna get married, aren’t they)

tara and luke be like "who's this lady?"

OKAY I'M SO EXCITED FOR NEXT WEEK LFG

[mymanyfandomramblings]

Glee-cap: Episode 4x14--I Do

I'm watching Glee for the first time, and writing recaps of my episode reactions (I'm also watching it a second time through with my sister, and I'll provide those recaps too). Here's my reaction recap for I Do

We start off strong--Finn and Rachel. Together! (Know that I am a Finchel shipper, before we go any farther)

Aaaaaand Rachel giving Finn terrible advice. Please stop.

Also, I do love Finn's 'not everything is about you'. I love Rachel, but she needed to hear that

Yesss Emma!! I love how confident she's gotten. Stressy, but a lot more confident

"I hope it's Britney again." Never change, Brittany, never change

Cory Monteith's facial expressions are perfect. Especially the 'internally screaming' one.

Emma knows exactly how to communicate with Artie. To a vaguely concerning degree.

Marley is so cute, especially with Jake. Her smile is so sweet, and I totally believe they are In Love

Jake is a sweetie too

Ryder is so level-headed, and I love him as well. Also yes, call out Puck dating a sophomore (as much as I like Puck, I don't like that subplot whatsoever)

Shoutout to the ridiculous outfit that looks like the lovechild of Kurt and Mike's fashion sense that Puck is wearing in the flashback

The bro-ship between Ryder and Jake is amazing. Ryder's acting is so bad. The tuxedos are everything

Jake and Marley's musical chemistry is *chef's kiss*

Not gonna lie, that bouquet was gorgeous

Yesss, Mercedes!! I love her!

And Sue is officially hilarious. "What, this old thing? It's an exact replica of your wedding dress."

and we're back with the random cracks about Finn's weight. The dude's insecure, and everyone needs to back off him

Aside from the aforementioned fat-shaming, every word out of Sue's mouth is gold. Not whatsoever helpful for poor Emma, but comedy gold

And Jayma Mays shows off hitherto unsuspected talents with Getting Married Today, as does Amber Riley. I haven't loved any of Emma's songs before this point but goshdarn it, Jayma knocks this out of the park.

Emma's freaking out, meanwhile Sue is just eating, and I love it.

Brad is the organist. Guy cannot catch a break.

Shout out to Becky, the world's most angry looking flower girl. Also shout-out to Kurt's reaction.

The doors open and...SUE. Gosh, I love her sometimes. And the organ crashing to a halt is hilarious.

Will and Sue's faces straight afterwards are delightful

Brittany mouthing that Sue 'looks so good' as she walks down the aisle at someone else's wedding. Never change, Brittany.

Jane Lynch hit comedy out of the ballpark in this episode. Everything Sue does here is hilarious

Finn now has himself in deep trouble

I am, at my heart, a Samcedes shipper, but I can't lie, he and Britts are pretty cute

Marley looks so pretty in that darkish pink.

I am vaguely frustrated that my hunch that Ryder has been having all of Jake's ideas all this time was correct, but I do still appreciate that they're bros, rather than, you know, fighting.

Jake and Ryder: Most Reasonable Dudes in the Glee-verse

Kurt's dance moves always make me laugh. I also love that Blaine looks so intense while he sings, and meanwhile Kurt's shimmying around and making Big facial expressions

Yes, Artie!!! For all his faults, Artie is really good at standing up for himself (no pun intended)

Sam and Brittany are so unhinged together /affectionate

Lots of people find Tina OOC in S4, but ever since The Power Of Madonna she's been given to occasional outbursts where she never gives her outburstee enough context to know what they've done

The comic timing on 'Did you vapo-rape my ex-boyfriend' is so perfect.

Did my eyes deceive me, or was Sam also lining up to catch the bouquet too?

Finn is my favourite character but occasionally he takes this particular tone with Rachel, and I Don't Like It

Whoa, Finn gets poetic and metaphorical. Guess being a teacher did make him smarter

Rachel missing the point is always hilarious.

I love Finn, and I love Finchel, but he's being just a tad presumptuous and condescending here, and I wish he'd express these same sentiments in a different way

Okay, what's with almost every couple heading upstairs. I kind of hoped that Marley would set some boundaries for Jake to respect (I mean, I'm not saying she has to, I'm saying that it would have been nice to see what would actually have happened if Ryder had been right, and how Jake would respond)

And that's how you know that I'm writing this as I watch, because I got what I wanted. Jake is so chill about it, even after getting his hopes up, and I'm glad he's not letting Marley apologise

Ah the glorious love between Brody and Rachel where they're constantly lying and being unfaithful. Love it /heavy sarcasm

Tina's dress is so cute

RYDER! You have been being so great the last few episodes now you ruin it!!

Artie's French accent is so cute

Their final song is really good, even if the dancing makes them all look completely insane

I also appreciate that their final-episode songs are starting to look a lot more low-budget and like real school performances than they used to

It's way too soon for Rachel to actually know if she's pregnant--unless there was supposed to be a timelapse in that song, but okay then.

[ya-killin-me-smalls]

true actuaactually if I was in deis situation I'd straight up be docs bitch. WHO SAID THAT anyway er er I'm honestly really hoping dei and doc. DONT stay together cuz like. Yeah doc may have good intentions but he's not exactly exercising them right because Deimos I'm pretty sure Deimos fully believes doc wont want him if he can't provide sex. AND IDK if it was intentional but I think doc is written to be really predatory. Like chapter 2 of the fic where he repeatedly knows something is wrong but he doesnt look into it at all. And yeah he does care about Deimos but he never shows that in a way that I feel like Deimos can really fully believe? Like when have they spent time together that wasn't just for docs benefit.

And that's the THING doc is his boss and Deimos is nowhere near stable enough to handle this relationship which I think doc definitely knows but he just. ??? Doesn't care. And there's suchhh a power play with it. I'm begging you to end this fic well

okay I had to sit and think about this a lot because it's honestly such a good analysis mwah mwah kissing you platonically

SO. first and foremost I'm trying not to downplay just how much of what's going on Deimos's fault specifically. like don't get me wrong, they both suck here, but Deimos being unwilling to even address his own feelings/wants/needs, let alone communicate them, is a major source of Problems. additionally he's written to be an incredibly unreliable narrator who has a very difficult time reading facial expressions and tone of voice, and when you couple that with Doc being masked up most of the time his imagination runs wild with the intentions behind things that get said to him. won't be touching on this in the fic because I know a lot of people like to interpret him as bpd coded, cptsd coded, autistic, etc, but the actual reason behind that social struggle is an amygdalotomy that he doesn't remember that happened during his first year or so of life to curb aggression. it worked but had unfavorable side effects. this is mentioned in a different fic that I promise I'll finish and post eventually but yeah bro got brain damage and physically cannot read people accurately most of the time

there are times where Doc is there for Deimos's benefit, specifically in chapter 4 both in the middle of the night when Deimos takes off the heartbeat sensor to go find Sanford (makes it look like he flatlined) and the next morning when medical staff needs help because Deimos WILL hurt someone but they can't just leave him untreated. like you definitely aren't wrong there's something iffy there but credit where credit is due yk

Doc is very much written to be predatory on purpose. not in a strictly sexual sense but in general Doc has made it to where he's at because he IS a predator and even if he doesn't always take advantage of weakness he's always aware of it and knows he could use it at any time if he wants to. it's also like a critical detail that Doc reminds Deimos of his handler in a lot of ways so it's like a weird type of daddy issues where Deimos NEEDS this guy's approval and that's no one's fault. the other half of that equation is Doc is autistic as fuck and comes off the wrong way very often. example from an upcoming intermission to TIMH that I'll be posting soon:

it doesn't really cross his mind that staring silently at someone for several seconds might seem creepy, especially with the mask. when he's circling Sanford and looking injuries he DOES mean well, he knows Deimos is dangerous and that Sanford could be hurt, but Sanford feels like he's being circled by a shark and that's why he's shrinking back. he's trying his best man

when I say good ending or bad ending I'm just not sure if it ends in docmos or not. there is in fact another subplot underway before things resolve and it'll be pretty heavy but it's been planned since the beginning. it's actually very subtly implied that Hank and Sanford are a thing but unlike davebert they're pretty quiet about it. really only Doc is aware and it goes over Deimos's head any time it's mentioned and subsequently the reader's head as well

end of the day, a relationship isn't gonna fix this guy. everyone knows it, including Doc, but Doc is also kind of afraid of pushing Deimos away even a little bit because he knows Deimos isn't willing to get close to anyone else. he isn't 100% certain what Deimos wants out of this despite his best efforts to get Deimos to tell him, and in turn doesn't feel like he can fully express what he wants from Deimos because he knows the second he does that Deimos will just go along with it to keep the peace. they're both kinda coming from an angle of "I don't know what he fully wants but I do know he wants this" in terms of sex. does that mean he should be fully indulging him despite this massive gap in communication? nope! but Doc ain't perfect and is doing what he thinks is best for Deimos

also also I gotta defend his honor from chapter 2 because the warning signs he was ignoring were in all honesty his own. he's got a lot of lore in terms of relationships/sex and a lot of attachment issues, and he's very aware of this, so it was more the fact that Deimos was looking at him with such adoration and devotion that was making him feel some type of way. like "oh fuck he might actually like me and I have a long history of that going poorly" and he's trying not to project his own apprehension onto Deimos

he's used to a very unexpressive Deimos and most people looking at him with fear at best. he doesn't fully know how to process the anxiety this sudden surge of emotions causes him so he doesn't. smart move? nah

ok ok sorry for yapping so hard I just got so many thoughts about this stupid ship all the time

[dykesbat]

wait actually. list of things i like/dislike abt infinity nikki :3

note that ive been playing like my child self w love nikki (skipping past basically all of the lore unless sm catches my eye)

things i dislike:

its a gacha game and thus inherently predatory. esp when its marketed towards kids.

very little diversity. you can tell skin color was a second thought to the developers. there’s only four skin tones and when you press clear, the skin tone clears as well. there’s no way to set a default skin tone. a lot of the lip sticks look oversaturated on the darker skin tones. they did not care enough to adjust it and thats horrible.

i know we’re playing as nikki but i Would like at least some body diversity w her.

we need a clear resources button dear god.

i want an option to only send/receive snapshots from friends. let me take photos w my friends :(

option to send photos to our friends in chat!! and emotes!!!!!!! photo taking is half the game man.

the fact that summoning your whimcycle is locked behind that paid bike :’’’ im sick of losing it bro.

less of a dislike and more of a i want more of this but: this game neeeeds more poses, lighting, and filters for the photo mode. the fact that theres no pause for clothing animations and no facial expressions has also been killing me.

i want a way to download photos from the album. i also want a way to favorite photos from the album.

some of the clothing animations for longer skirts are kinda stiff

i want more styles so bad. its so hard trying to put together a masculine outfit w the current selection

the store outfits are killing me they need to stop.

i really want more custom outfit slots its killing me to only have four. this is a fashion game i need more.

having to evolve outfits in a particular order fucking sucks. also needing copies of the entire outfit for an evolution fucking sucks.

i want more energy i feel like im divided between 17 different things that all require energy that i dont have.

again, super demanding on you graphics. like i get why but it gives me a heart attack.

i want a styling battle animation skip button.

i know its for lore reasons but the fact that we cant use gliding or shrinking everywhere sucks.

i want a layer button for tops and bottoms

i want to be able to use the outfit quicksap ability while in camera mode. also want an option to turn off hand helds in camera mode.

need more black hairs im gonna start killing someone.

need better kindled inspiration hints

things i like:

genuinely beautiful game visually stunninggg. the fact that there are no quest locked areas and we can head into photo mode basically anywhere is sooo sooo cool to me.

photo mode is also beautiful and allows the players to have so much creative freedom. like they know what we want. we can pose our nikki and pause her mid animation, we can put lighting on her in different colors, she has different poses depending on circumstances (ex: sitting at a particular area, interacting w an item), we have focal length, adjustable aperture, the npc’s pose with you etc etc. its sooo sooo cool and interactive. and i love that the lighting and filters have intensity adjustments.

the details on the clothes and scenery are sooooo beautifully done. everything is gorgeous i want to stop and take a million photos all the time.

the fact that they are so responsive to their playerbase is awesome. most of the common complaints have already been dealt with.

pretty generous which im actually surprised abt. launch was huge ofc they gave us a free four star outfit for nikkis birthday, a free four star outfit for pre registering, and like 120 free pulls. and for cny theyre giving us like 4 free sets + two evolutions whcih is sooo crazy to me and they have items in store tht you can buy w diamonds!!!! the hanfu set and its evolution was less than two ten rolls! and they have a placeable picnic set for the same amount of diamonds you get in your dailies!!!! thats crazy!!

i really like that we can choose make up i think thats fun sorry.

the fact that you can find npc’s in the open world :’))) <3 it makes the world feel sooo lived in its wonderful. AND AGAIN! THEY POSE WITH YOUUUU!!!!!! i do wish we could choose their poses but ill take what i can get.

i do think snapshots are a vv fun way to interact w people <3 its vv fun seeing other peoples photos when youre not overwhelmed lmao.

the jump height is soooo whimsical i love it every time i jump in any other game it feels so dull now.

i like that the combat doesn’t require you to level your nikki. they get so creative bc of that too. the boss battles needing you to use different abilities is sooo cool.

bettina design. i need her carnally.

the songs for this game are soooo gorgeous. their event has a chinese opera-ish song thats soooo sooo beautiful i love it sm. and the osts are awesome.

actually made momo likeable lmao

nikkis sooooo cutiepie :’) <3 ok this one isnt specific to infinikki i have bias from LN sorry.

separating hats and hair clips / necklaces and chokers is suuuch a genius move i love being able to layer accessories.

the frogs have different dialogue if you wear the shirt they gave you :’’’)

being able to replay the domains whenever we want? amazing work. also wonderful for photos.

[andivmg]

do you ever see yourself going back to being a content creator?

(warning: accidental trauma dump ahead)

get out of my walls

i was JUST talking to my bf about this last night. i think about it a lot tbh. i’ve talked about it here a few times already but if i did go back to content creation it would be more vlog type stuff. like on some mai pham shit yk? it just makes me so nervous bro idk.

like idek how to describe it but the thing that’s holding me back the most i think is like social anxiety but make it online. i got so much hate and so many people being so mean and judgemental towards me that i now assume anything i post or anything i’m in will garner negativity. like i cannot even begin to explain to y’all how bad it is. i overthink everything i post, on instagram, on here… that’s why i rarely post on tiktok anymore like i can’t even really look at any video or picture without finding at least 10 immediate flaws wether it be in my appearance, how i’m talking, what i’m saying, literally if there is even one minuscule thing off, i will notice and not post.

the only post this doesn’t apply to is my anni post w danny bc there are some pictures there that i don’t look my best in but i was happy in the moment and that’s why it went up.

i think it’s easier for me to rant and post on here because i don’t actually have to speak. That comes with its own set of issues though. For example, you guys can’t tell my tone when i’m speaking, or the cadence of my voice. You can’t see my facial expressions, which sucks because i think i’m such an expressive person. i fr talk with my whole body, arms, face, everything. Obviously none of that translates here which i feel creates a disconnect between me (poster) and you (reader). I think i find comfort in that distance though. It’s almost like when you go through a really bad breakup and say you’re never letting people close enough to hurt you that way again. It’s like that for me.

So maybe one day i’ll return to making my own content and posting again. It’s definitely something i want to do. I’m just scared right now. And i don’t know when i’ll stop being scared.

[thegongoozlerreacts]

Hazbin Hotel Episode 1: Overture

hello i am back with a New Update on things to react to, and i thought Hazbin Hotel would be the perfect place to start since all episodes were fully released a few days ago! and also EVERYBODY i know has been bugging me about watching this show and now i FINALLY have the time to!!

spoilers under the cut

wow barely a few seconds in and i can already tell that the music is gonna be So Banger

wow okay so the opening exposition is Super Interesting

just wanna say the animation is also Fantastic in this section but ooh the lore drops

i really love the way the angels are stylized here, and how its all in black and white with accents of gold (except Lucifer who has a very light red gradient in his wings)

and also its the way that More color is brought on screen by Lucifer only oooh

oohh and the way that red gradient turns gray when the angels are like, disapproving of his ideas

its So Funny how Adam fumbled his first wife So Hard that she ran away and fell in love with someone else then his second wife got convinced by the First Wife and Her New Love LMFAOO

MAN this makes me feel SO Bad for Lucifer and i feel Conflicted as someone raised christian but like. i feel bad for him they do say that the road to hell was paved with good intentions

also Lilith thriving on the evil stuff like you Go Girlboss

these are So Pretty to look at

aww Charlie and Vaggie are So Cute

SEVEN YEARS? ouch seven years without hearing anything from her mom

omg they are So Cute

OMG THIS IS SO CUTE

damn the ominous Ringing of the Bell in the only angelic-like structure of hell

BYE ALASTOR'S AD.....

"Founded five days ago by Lucifer's ~delusional~ daughter!"

"As she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you!" STOPPPP NAHHH THATS FOULL

the shaky camera i cant

"HAHA I NAMED IT" LMFAOOOO yeah you sure did buddy

incredible, they dont have A Working Phone

their faces LMFAOO

love that Alastor is bad at TV commercials because he's like... a radio host. the radio demon. he is Decidedly Not a TV Guy

also can i just say that the animation is So Smooth and So Fluid like wow i could rewatch the way each character moves 100 times and that is NOT exaggeration

help he is So Mad that they arent doing a radio show

ok actually Angel Dust's voice is really good like?? idk something about it is just Fun to listen to

Charlie trying to be So Nice is extremely entertaining

OMG HUSK !! HIS VOICE HELP !! it fits So Well

also shoutout to the background music

omg Angel Dust has got a little heart spot on the back of his head thats really really cute

aww Charlie is so cute

OOH A SONG ALREADY

LMFAOO "That bitch is halfway down the street!" i love Angel's goofy little smile as he says it also Amazing how the fuck did she get over there so quickly????

i love Charlie's and Vaggie's voice

"They're bloodthirsty and deranged!" <- really funny that this is being said about angels

he is a Hologram hey this guy's An Asshole what the fuck did Charlie ever do to you

new reaction image she looks so done with his bullshit im cackling

i can already tell that the new commercial is Not gonna go well

HEKSDJKSDN ANGEL DUST "I need a big strong daddy to put me in my place... on the path to redemption!" THE CHANGE IN TONE I CANNOT

oh ok so this Asshole Angel Guy is adam

"I'm the original dick!" BRO???? HELP?? IM ?? this does not sound like Angelic Behavior anyways what The Fuck is he even on about

the fact that he specifically calls out Climate Change as Earth's Problem, but not HERPES?? implies that angels get herpes i guess????

HELFHLDKJ I CANT Hazbin Hotel is KILLING it with the facial expressions

there is not One Thought behind that eye new reaction image

its okay Nifty you're trying your best

there are just Too Many good reaction images and memes spawned from just this One episode

Alastor is So Mad and Bitter about TV

BRUH the way he couldve done all that The Whole Time but he didnt because he Hates tv 😭😭

also wtf Nifty's giant now

well... at least Vaggie and the Hotel Gang are having a better time than Charlie with this Asshole Angel Guy

"I've never made a mistake in my fucking life" says the guy who fucked up so bad that he had to get a second wife

fuck this song is banger BUT i hate adam

DAMN "And for those of us with divine ordainment/Extermination is entertainment!" fuck when he sings it it goes So Hard but like aw :(( what The Fuck Heaven

WTF THEY MOVED IT EARLIER ????? WHY ??

help Alastor just glitching on screen

oh what The Fuck theyre moving it earlier cuz somehow a demon killed an angel? and theyre gonna kill ALL OF THE DEMONS????? WHAT

and thats the end of the episode im.

wow well. honestly it was REALLY good and i am so excited to watch the rest of the series

unfortunately i have to go now, bye i will be back with my reactions to the second episode! tomorrow (hopefully)

farewell, folks!

[gh0ston1c]

blood has no meaning if you don't have any

wednesday x reader

you meet her parents and she meets yours. although you all shared the same taste of color in life, both of your parents were totally different.

warning: tried to keep it as gender neutral as i could but reader do be masc, arguing, a good old hard bitch slap but fluffy ending!

a/n: writing skills be mid and sometimes confusing but bare with me, i write what's in my head and i don't proofread. we here for pure enjoyment lmaoaoo

y/ns pov

it's been a couple of months of wednesday and i being together. in a way, we both understand each other perfectly, and every day with her i look forward to more. except for today.

today was the day when parents come onto campus. and we agreed to introduce our families to each other. i am rather excited than nervous to meet her family. the infamous gomez and morticia addams. and her brother pugsley whom she mentioned before. from the stories that i have heard, they don't sound like bad people. they just like dangerous things.

but a part of me was still nervous. you always want to leave a good impression on yourself.

"are you going to keep staring at the wall or..?" i flinched back from being snapped out of a trance. it was my roommate kane who happened to be a zombie. don't know how and don't want to know but anyways.

"i don't know man. i didn't think today was going to be so soon." he gave me a half smile before laying his hand on my shoulder "only two days bro, you can do it," he paused "and if anything were to happen, just dig out and say-" kane was rudely interrupted by the door busting open and the two least people i wanted to see.

"my offspring." my father spoke as he stood before us in all his glory in a clad black suit next to my stepmother. "ever heard of knocking?" i ask in a monotonous tone. his head cocked sideways and with a dead expression he replied to me "know your place and watch who you're talking to." those words made me sit up and automatically hang my head down. it was a signal to my father that i submit. he breathes out with a smirk, "your mother and i discussed you and regarding nevermore and we've decided that you are to come back and be head of the clan." my mother smiles with glee and softly claps her hands in excitement as to where i had no thoughts. how do i process this?

"what?" i say aloud. "you're coming back home." my father says, i look at him with confusion. "why?" i ask "well, im getting old and the clan needs a fit person to lead and it's you," he explains. but it doesn't click. they send me here because i was a troubled child back home and now they want me back?

"that's not happening." i stated. "who are you to make commands." i sat there with nothing to say, my jaw clenched and eyes glaring at the ground. i can hear his feet step closer and then my chin was grabbed and forcefully pulled up to look him in the face. his face showed pure anger and once again i felt like the eight-year-old crying while dad threatened me for stepping out of line. "ever since you've come to this school you have been acting a fool. fix it before i do." he practically threw my chin down and walked. i sat there in silence taking everything that just happened.

"woah..... you okay..." kane hesitantly asked to which i replied with silence. "umm.... i'll just give you space.... feel better bro" and with that, he also left.

just two days.

i gave myself 30 minutes to collect myself before going to meet with wednesday. as i entered the quad, i saw many heads of different varieties. my eyes immediately found wednesday who never failed to stand out. right, where we always met. she met my eyes and my face automatically smiled. when i arrived next to her, she grabbed my hand and pulled me "let's get this over with." in her path, i already see three people who resemble wednesday and you can tell they were family and not even by facial resemblance. her mother was a very tall plump figure, her father was short and stubby and a short male who looked.... friendly.

"mother, father. this is my partner, y/n." her parents' faces lit up with joy "hello, it's so good to finally meet you, i am morticia, her mother." her words came out very smoothly. my focus turned to the man who beamed with happiness "my name is gomez, im so happy to see my little psychopath finding love" he said with awe. "my therapist suggests sociopath." wednesday butt into the introduction. "you're both," i turn my head to the shorter boy, he was about the height of my biceps "my name is pugsley. it's nice to meet you, she talks too much about you." i chuckle and from the corner of my eyes, i see wednesday give her little brother the hardest glare. "im happy to have met you all. this is a step towards something more serious," as lighthearted as i could make my laugh sound after i said that, wednesday still held a straight face. "i think she agrees." her parents both lowkey force a smile and nod anyways.

"well consider yourself a very lucky one. our little rain cloud has always had trouble making friends," morticia paused to frown, with her husband following her "why when she was a young child, we would take her to the park to play with the other children and she would sometimes push them down the slide or force feed them sand.." morticia stopped and gave an awkward smile "oh! and when she was in middle school, we put her into ballet classes!!"

BALLET CLASSES?????

"she hated it!! and she had on the tutu and everything! i think i still have a picture, let me-" before gomez could finish, wednesday cut him off "that's enough." she stepped in and hooked onto my foreman. "we still have to meet their parents." i did not want this to end.

her family is just as amazing as her and i was loving the conversation. but i did not want her to meet my family. i only saw my parents today but i still have yet to meet my 2 older step-brothers.

"well, it was lovely to finally meet you, darling. i hope to see you more often. wednesday has been in a much better mood lately." wednesday immediately dragged me away to the darker part of the quad.

the fangs section.

i dragged my feet to stop her from dragging me. she looks at me perplexed and i let out a hugh sigh.

"i have to warn you, love," her eyebrows scrunches "my family..... they're.... how do i say this" i stand there and contemplate. "very strict is an obvious but... it's not strict. it's fear. i don't know how to correctly word it."

"and i know you're not afraid of almost everything and im not saying you're going to be afraid of them..." i try to drag on. i can't find words to say my family is shit without saying my is shit! "what im saying is... i don't think you may like them..."

"i don't like everyone in the first place. im only doing this because i feel like this is a milestone in our relationship," a big smile stretched onto my face and i swore my love for this girl increased by a gazillion. "i want us to be forever."

"forever." i say and remove my wrist from her grip to intertwine our fingers, i brought it up to lips and gave the back of her hand a gentle kiss

-

when wednesday and i approached them, we weren't even close yet "you're late." these were the first words that came out of my father's mouth. i subtly grip her hand a little tighter but not enough to hurt her. "sorry father, wednesdays family was very lovely to meet and we could not stop conversing." it's like a habit but my head slightly bows. "you should be more considerate of peoples time. you have lots to learn before you lead." then he turned to the girl who started at him through her eyebrows

"and who may this be?" i let out the breath i didn't know i was holding and straightened my back. "this is wednesday addams, she is my girlfriend. my other half." i scanned his face for any reaction. like a vampire, dead as a doornail, he had no reaction. "addams family huh? a line of witches and magic." he paused and took his sunglasses off, my father's eyes a vibrant red that held no soul or humanity. his head turned to me and his eyes immediately connect with mine which were the same as his. appearance-wise, i was a mirror image of my father but internally, we were two opposites and he hated that. "i see you've been hiding secrets; however feel i must share some educational information. did you know witches used to hunt vampires?" i knotted my eyebrows to him, the fuck does that have to do with anything? "and yet you come here with one of their kind. disrespectful. have i not taught you anything?" his voice laced with anger

"she hasn't done anything to us so i don't see why there is a problem." from my peripheral view, i can't see her whole face but i know she's giving my father the deadliest glare. "her family slaughtered our kind, we were used for blood spells and experiments." with his teeth gritted, he kept poking my chest with every word "that's my problem"

"if it's your problem then keep it to yourself," wednesday spoke out, i hadn't realized that during our little argument, we managed to gather the attention of all my other family members that we still haven't been able to greet

my father's head slowly turns to my girlfriend who happens to be kinda small. "repeat those words little girl." a 5000-year-old vampire challenging a 16 high schooler. never woulda thought.

i watch my girlfriend step forward with no twitch in her face, every muscle relaxed "call me little girl again and i will not hesitate to shine everyone here but y/n with a UV light." i see my father's mouth twitch in annoyance and his jaws clenching in anger.

my father always made sure he was "alpha" and having someone step up to him so boldly, let alone a teen witch was extremely rare. "she's something else y/n" he said as he still held eye contact with wednesday "pack your shit, you're leaving tonight." he turned around and stomped in anger but before he could leave my field of vision i say "im not leaving. im staying here. with wednesday." my words seem to peak his anger as he stops with a loud stomp and furiously pivots back in my direction with a killer stare, deep down i was truly afraid

"i've had enough of your attitude!" my vision snaps towards wednesdays direction as i feel a stinging sensation in my cheeks. im dead yet i felt that slap. "you are to pack up and leave this place. all you've been is a headache and i can no longer tolerate it. you will be leading this clan, and that's final." no way in hell was i going to leave wednesday. "no father, i am not leaving." my voice was a little wobbly but as firm as i could make it out. "oh really? you're going to cut your family for some girl you just met?!" he finally blew up. this is exactly why i didn't want her to meet them. we didn't even get a simple hi.

"and what about it? all the years ive lived, this is the time where i feel most loved!" i bark back at my father, his veins poppings out his neck and forehead "if you choose her over this family, don't even come back. you will not be welcomed back and forever be exiled from the clan." apart of me broke. your family is all you know and what built you to become your person. "since you're going to make me choose, i choose wednesday! she's the soul that fills my empty capsule of a body, she is everything you guys are not!" my voice strained as that was the loudest i have ever spoken to my father

"when she dies, don't come back crawling to us." before making his way out of the section as my stepmother follows him and slowly the rest of my family does but before all of them were gone i made sure to give it closure

"YOURE ALL DEAD TO ME."

-

"that was quite eventful," wednesday said. we came back to my dorm room and kinda just sat there in silence for a couple of minutes "im sorry wens. i-i just- ugh" i let out a huge relieving sigh and slouched "that was a shit show."

"are you serious?" my attention peaked with confusion as i look at her "what do you mean serious? im sorry wens-" she cuts me off "no, i mean, are you serious that you left your family for me?" my eyebrows lifted. honestly, my mind wasn't straight during the argument and words flew out of my mouth. but thinking about it, does that mean im free from duty? im free from the fear tactics? "im dead serious," i stated, her eyes glinting with a tiny bit of happiness and surprise

"my love... ive lived decades and centuries. ive met and seen many people. but only you have managed to make me feel soulful. you are my soulmate and whatever life and heart i have left of me is all yours mi amore." my love for her goes beyond horizons and oceans. she grabs the collar of my uniform and plants a kiss on my lips. my hands find their place on her head to bring her in closer, since i am taller, i stand above her as her head is tilted up to reach for my lips, and her hands are now around my torso.

after a few seconds, we pull away heaving with swollen lips and red cheeks. "to leave your family for me is an honor. although i do think you're a bit weak," my jaw dropped playfully but she continued "but you looked so sexy when you were arguing, i wanted you to claim and change me right there." she whispers and this was very overwhelming bold for me. i grin and hide my face from her "you and that mind will be the death of me. but i would die over and over again just for you my love."

"mon cher." once again we pulled each other into a kiss which would always turn into a makeout section.

[skeletood]

OHHHHH SO MANY THOUGHTS TO SHARE

Holy shit. Probably the hardest I’ve laughed at any of the new seasons releases so far. Absolutely speechless

Hellhole:

- SOOOOO HAPPY to see them riff again it’s so corny and silly

- Beavis gets to hell and his first thought is where all the biker dudes are? interesting interesting *puts this in my notes

-oh my god already some amazing facial expressions

no wonder this dude ends up with so many cracked teeth in the future

- the boys being inexplicably immune to death never gets old to me

- THE DARKNESS PART HAD MY HEAD IN MY HANDS SHUT UP. THANK **GOD** IT WASN’T ANOTHER ESCAPED SNAKE SITUATION DEAR GOD IVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER FOR A BAIT AND SWITCH

-hehe :] sillies

Overall thoughts: Another great ep this season good job guys, gave me a lot of good little laughs

The video segment was whatever but Arianna’s eye candy so like. All good :]

Take A Bow:

My god. I had absolutely no idea what was going to happen on the way in to this episode and I was NOT prepared for what it gave me and put me through

- already starting the ep strong with some GREAT facial expressions

so fucking real i used to do this to my guy friends when i was their age. not quite enough to put them in the hospital but like. yea lmao

- (monotone) “Take a bow” HAD ME DYINNNNGGGGG

- knowing about all the flavors of mountain dew what a goddamn nerd (knows everything about the different monster flavors)

- “Cherries don’t taste red at ALL. They taste all barfy” little kids complaining about foods they dont like is so silly, thank you for being your childish self its so refreshing

oh man. fuck. its butthead characterization time! finally some good fucking food. oh man here come the waterworks IMAGINE me getting stupid over an emotionally stunted idiot with a big head:

- “not until youre better beavis” first of all shut up. second of all shut up.

- “It’s like, I didn’t mean to hurt him. Feeling bad sucks.” WE KNOW BABY. WE KNOW. SO PROUD OF YOU FOR ADMITTING IT HUN :((((( the fact that bro cant even acknowledge he HAS feelings unless he’s alone. the volumes that speaks to me. man

if you had told me a week ago these were real screenoshots i wouldnt have believed you. at all. cant wait to see the looks on the faces of all the “ohh stop looking so far into it its just a stupid lowbrow cartoon” people like shut the fuck up!!!!! youve clearly never experienced real friendship before and are so pissed off cause u dont know what it looks like

- not pictured here is where they had to forcefully remove butthead from the room bc he was freaking out after thinking he killed beavis. If you disagree youre just wrong sorry!

- not only is this a funny as hell angle but man. we already know damn well he doesn’t want beavis to die but its nice to hear him say it. also he’s right, it was really funny. take a bow :]

- a lot of really good beavis screams this episode too

- BOY. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT “COVID” IS. MR JUDGE IM STRIKING THAT FROM THE RECORDS BUT YOURE ON THIN FUCKING ICE AKJSDSNA

- “-and his friend would have died of grief shortly there-after” I’m- I need a minute. LIKE WE ALREADY KNEW THIS BUT. THANKS FOR ADMITTING IT. 

- also, god is a whiteman i guess kasjndsajkd

In conclusion: both fucking great episodes. I am always EXTRA excited for Butt-Head characterization moments, it just makes him so much more human. Not to mention how happy I am to see that they toned down his cruelty JUST a touch. I honestly didn’t notice how bad it had gotten last season until i compared it to how this one is going so far, it feels more like older seasons butthead again :] Like dont get me wrong i LOVE it when he’s mean its just who he is but it should come more out of a place of stupidity/no real self awareness than like. idk wherever it was coming from last season. These boys are goin soft on us and to that i say: thank god. It’s nice to see them act human. Take a bow has EASILY taken old man beavis’ place as my favorite ep so far and ngl its going to be tough to beat. Funny episode that had me chuckling throughout the whole thing AND nice Butt-Head moments? Oh Mike, you shouldnt have u///u

Anyways lemme know your thoughts :]

[majimasleftasscheek]

Hey idk if you're doing these rn, and I'm sorry if you aren't, but i was wondering: do you have any head canons for trans!kiryu? If that's even one of your head canons.

no worries, I'll take headcanon requests anytime! I don't particularly have trans hcs for characters since it's not an experience I personally relate to/have thorough knowledge about other than my trans friendos but I don't mind giving it a try!

I think he's super trans positive obvs but for the longest time he wasn't necessarily that kind to himself. He's often the bearer of burdens and feels the need for self punishment so I feel like he would struggle with such a concept that he can change himself and feel better about it. A man who struggles to self practice what he preaches in a sense, self doubt and all that

he's also prolly super ignorant of things. Like, doesn't know the meaning of terms or the nuances of it all. Not necessarily a bad thing of course, just when he's talking to other people about it he'll sound confused or get things wrong with the best intentions of course. He was raised very simply and I highly doubt Kazama was a fountain of knowledge for him. I would think he'd support Kiryu cuz that's his fav boy but outside of that he's like aight do whatever you gotta do kiddo, anyway keep beating up people with stop signs

Kiryu leans heavily into masculine behaviors and idealisms since his whole worldview has been brought up by these tough, manly yakuza dudes that he at one point idolized and that's just how he thinks men should be. So he becomes overly stoic, flatly emotional and strong. Values fights and muscles and manly shit like gut punching. Maybe it takes him a long time to realize things aren't so black and white but it makes it hard for him to open up and express himself. He's terrified of people finding out in such a hypermasculine community so he's easy to clam up and treat things with his fists over conversation unless proven otherwise

Nishiki would totally be the supportive best bro, helping him with confidence and day to day living n all that. Lil stuff that makes Kiryu feel normalized and cozy. Kiryu can be one for exaggeration but he likes to take things slow and feel like he's just another person. Nishiki could definitely keep things light hearted

because I can't NOT mention Majima in 99% of what I do, he would be super supportive of Kiryu. He treats everything so casually that Kiryu is actually taken off guard many times, not used to someone who doesn't really give a damn about how someone lives their life. It's comforting to know someone as wack ass as Majima would be outright accepting and very likely violently protective 

Haruka! I think at some point he'd have to explain everything to her - after like, really educating himself without fumbling over words or terminology and ends up doing that anyway but she gets the gist. Frankly she prolly understands more than he does and she helps him out, being really forthcoming and accepting. He's her dad in the end and that makes him happy. This also makes him pretty familiar with feminine issues n things so that’s a unique perspective for her growing up

I think he’d be really proud of that facial hair he has. He keeps it nice n groomed and was quite happy when it first came in. Same goes for his body. He likes to keep toned in that masculine way he wants to be. He probably was a lil unsure about things when he first started transitioning but Nishiki could have been there to help out and really encourage him

I hope this was good! I can't speak for the trans experience personally so I had a lil help from some of my pals. I like to talk about feelings and acceptance which really resonates with me so I hope I got that across

[zalrb]

OTH Rewatch 1x02

This exposition is actually killing me.

“This game is for all of us.” HOW.

Tim calling Lucas “the bastard” is just so awkward, what YEAR is this?

WHAT is this chant? How am I supposed to take this seriously after “clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose”? H O W.

And speaking of FNL, they did such a great job in showing that this town lived and breathed football and that the players were gods, this is just a regular ass basketball team.

BROOKE!

“Nice hands.” “Nice legs.” OK for the context of the scene, that retort doesn’t work? She’s insulting him??

Whitey is a terrible coach.

I DON’T WANNA BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT I’VE BEEN TRYNA BE LATELYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

LOL Peyton being with Nathan is obviously just supposed to show that Nathan has everything that Lucas wants but there’s no real motivation for her and that just makes the entire two seconds of their relationship insufferable because even the angle that Peyton is with him because she’s afraid of actually caring about somebody can be done with her just being alone.

Nathan constantly insulting Peyton’s music just to emphasize that Peyton and Lucas have similar tastes is so obvious because it’s CLUNKY.

Who was recording this game because it wasn’t Dan so how does he have a tape?

I just think it’s funny that Peyton is supposed to be deep and angsty but all that happens is that she doesn’t give straight answers to questions and she insults people. And I would be like that’s really high school if the characters had any of the urgency of teenagers, like say what you will about DC, that sense of urgency and every small thing is monumental comes across.

“I stuck my neck out for you” but I mean, DID YOU?

This. Is. So. SLOW.

“I wish things could go back to the way they were.” Lucas, NOTHING. HAS. CHANGED. You had a bad game and Peyton said “choke” to describe you and Nathan called you a “bastard” but that was one isolated incident, it’s not like you walked into school and everyone was ridiculing you whereas before you were just a loner.

The funny thing about this scene with Brooke and Peyton is Peyton looks at her like she said the most vapid thing in the world

but Sophia’s delivery, her facial expressions, her tone makes what Brooke said sad

and that actually makes her more intriguing and complex than Peyton to me because there’s a lot going on with Brooke and she puts on a facade, Peyton is pretty one note.

Oh god, I have to skip this “I want my art to mean something” scene because there’s only so much I can take. Bro, season one is ROUGH.

Karen getting up and leaving when Lucas says she wasn’t even there is like ??? I mean you weren’t though. You encouraged him to play and didn’t show up to his game.

Karen’s house is pretty big.

Chad was so skinny.

Oh my god, I didn’t pass I want my art to mean something part yet??

ANGSTY TEARING DOWN ART OFF THE WALLS. I’ve had enough of Peyton and it’s been two episodes.

It’s funny because the amount of times they have Haley bring up Dawson’s Creek and how she’s not Joey secretly in love with Dawson just makes her seem secretly in love with Lucas.

Lucas is like Dawson though, SHUT UP. You’re not introspective, you’re just burdening everyone with your problems. And this is also a writing problem. EVERYONE cares about lucas? fucking jake lurking in the corners “don’t let him take it” WHY DO YOU CARE, JAKE?

And this is why he was a good balance with Brooke, he’s less insufferable with her.

Oh my god, everyone is getting on my nerves.

“Your art matters!” Profound.

[the-wild-wolves-around-you]

hear those bells ring: chapter 4 (a deaf!bakugo x reader fic)

Summary: Bakugo and Reader finally get a moment alone, and important conversations are had. Over dinner of course ;) 

Pairings: Katsuki Bakugo x Reader; Katsuki Bakugo x You

Rating: M(ature)

Warnings: Adult language.

A/N: Sorry for the wait on ch 4, but it’s over 10k, so hope that makes up for it lol Anyway, hope you enjoy!

~*~*~ No spoilers or anything. This is just a self-indulgent AU fic with aged up characters. Everyone’s in their mid-20s. Fic title is from a song called “Achilles Come Down.”

Ao3 Link: Here

Ch 1 Tumblr Link: Here

Ch 2 Tumblr Link: Here

Ch 3 Tumblr Link: Here 

“Great. See you then.” 

The words ricocheted around your head like pinballs, and all you could do was stare as Dynamight turned on his heel and strode out of your ruined shop like he couldn’t stand to be there a second longer. 

“Bak—bro, c’mon!” Red Riot, or Kirishima as he insisted, called after the blond, who didn’t stop. Then the redhead turned back to you, clapping his hands in front of his face and bowing his head. “I’m so sorry about him. He can be a little…” 

“Direct?” you offered when the hero trailed off into silence for a beat to long. 

“I was gonna say he can be a little bit of a dick, but that sounds better,” Kirishima laughed, and you felt your face flush when he aimed that charming grin in your direction. 

You’d heard stories of how charismatic Red Riot was. He was a popular, mainstream favorite hero. The gossip magazines were always covered with his shirtless pictures that never failed to rile up the female population, even Mrs. Kojima and her old lady friends. 

But nothing could have prepared you for being in front of him, for having him wink and smile at you, even if you logically knew he wasn’t coming onto plain old you. He was currently wearing a dark hoodie and non-descript jeans, but you could still see the definition of his muscles through the bulky clothing, which definitely wasn’t helping matters. 

“W-Well, I’m sure you and D-Dynamight have more important places to be,” you stuttered as you averted your eyes. “I-I don’t want to keep you from any hero business.” 

“Alright, alright, I can take a hint, I’ll get out of your hair,” Kirishima chuckled as he held his hands up. 

Your face burned even hotter, if that was possible. “N-No! I mean—” 

“Just a joke.” The redhead winked at you again as he started to back up toward the front door, his boots crunching over glass and debris. “I’ll see you later, though. Oh! And, uh, make sure you’re on time tonight for Bak—Dynamight’s pick up. He really hates tardiness.” 

“Noted,” you murmured as your stomach bottomed out inside you. 

“Don’t look so terrified!” the pro hero laughed, pausing in the frame of your broken doorway. “I promise he’s not so bad once you get to know him. All bark, no bite, remember? But if he does bark at you too much, just let me know, and I’ll be sure to leash him.” 

Kirishima shot another sharp-toothed grin at you, and you strained your facial muscles to try and flash him a small smile in return. You weren’t very successful, since Red Riot’s bright expression dimmed a fraction, but thankfully he didn’t come back into the store. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” he said in a more serious but reassuring tone. “We can get breakfast! I know all the great places around the agency.” 

“O-Okay.” You didn’t know what else to say. Why was this pro hero offering to take you to breakfast? Was this just because of the news? You’d seen how the media had been tearing into Dynamight the last two days, calling him reckless, arrogant. Several interviews with the other heroes who’d been on the scene didn’t help matters, either, since by their accounts, they almost had the villain handled before Dynamight stepped in. 

Maybe Red Riot was just trying to butter you up so you didn’t help with Dynamight’s crucifixion. 

What the redhead didn’t know, however, was you couldn’t say a word against the blond, even if you wanted to. 

“Okay,” Kirishima echoed and drew you out of your thoughts. The pro hero flashed you one last smile and put two fingers to his forehead in a jaunty salute. “Have a good rest of your afternoon and evening! And when you get to the agency, if you need anything, just let our PR manager Nao know. Take care!” 

With that, the redhead pulled up the hood on his sweatshirt, slipped on his sunglasses, and ducked out of your store. Seconds later, he was gone. 

A beat of silence passed by, then two, and then you felt your knees give out from under you as you collapsed to the floor. Pain flared through your lower legs as you struck the hard, debris-strewn tile, but you barely registered the discomfort. Your breathing started to quicken, coming out in harsh pants, and the two paper bags in your arms crinkled with the motion. 

“Fuck,” you exhaled as tears blurred your vision, lifting a shaky hand to grasp tightly at your hair. “Fuck.” 

You’d been so stupid. Yesterday, when neither Dynamight nor the police came banging down your hotel room door, you thought maybe you were just being paranoid. That the blond pro hero hadn’t noticed anything unusual, and you could just go living your normal, unimportant life. 

Of course, the universe just had to prove you wrong. 

Because if you had any doubts before, they were gone now, evaporated under Dynamight’s hot, crimson glare. 

He knew your secret, and he was going to confront you about it. Tonight. Why else would he insist on picking you up? Alone. You’d heard Red Riot say he was patrolling this evening, so he wouldn’t be around to play buffer between you and Dynamight, which provided the perfect opportunity for an interrogation. 

But what could you do? Refuse? Dynamight didn’t seem to be the type to take the word “no” very well. Run? The expression you’d seen on his face before he left clearly told you that you wouldn’t make it very far. Besides, where would you go? Your parents were in America, and as you embarrassingly admitted to that detective the other night, you didn’t have any friends. 

And, until your apartment and shop were renovated, you didn’t have a place to sleep, and you didn’t have the spare money to live out of a hotel, so the agency was really your only option. 

Well, there was prison, too, you supposed. Maybe Dynamight was just going to pick you up and take you straight to the police station. 

He’s not going to turn you in, a small, hopeful voice inside of you said. He would have already done so if that was his goal. 

There was logic behind that sentiment, but it offered you no comfort. 

Because if Dynamight didn’t want to turn you in, what did he want from you? 

~*~*~*~*~ 

“Mrs. Kojima,” you sighed for the millionth time. “I’m going to be fine. And I really can’t take all of this with me.” 

You gingerly passed the large paper bag full of glass food containers back to Tadashi, Mrs. Kojima’s teenaged grandson, who stared at the bag with the hunger only a sixteen-year-old boy could achieve. 

“Fine?” the old Japanese lady scoffed, narrowing her dark eyes at you. “You would be fine in a nice, fancy hotel, not in a building with those… those… delinquents!” 

“Delinquents?” you couldn’t help but laugh. “They’re pro heroes. Famous pro heroes, some of the top in the country.” 

“If they’re so good, they wouldn’t have destroyed your home,” Mrs. Kojima huffed before she used her cane to nudge her grandson. “And Tadashi, give the poor girl back her food. Your face is too gaunt to be healthy, girl, and don’t think I can’t see those circles under your eyes.” 

The boy sighed as he stared longingly at the homemade food, and you could have sworn he was drooling, but he obeyed his grandmother and extended the bag to you again. 

“No, please, keep it,” you insisted as you waved your hands in front of you, taking a step back. “I-I don’t know if there will be a place to keep food in my room, and I don’t want to bother them too much.” 

“You should bother them, since they’ve been such a bother to you,” the old lady said as she nudged you this time with her cane. “You are too nice. I always say this. You need to be more selfish.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You smiled. “But thank you for thinking of me, Mrs. Kojima. It was very kind for you and Tadashi to come see me off.” 

“How many times must I tell you to call me Ayano?” the elderly woman groused, tapping your shin with her cane again. “And of course we came. I wasn’t going to let you stand alone on a dark street and wait for that monster of a man.” 

“Grandma!” Tadashi gasped as he looked up from salivating into the bag of food. “Dynamight is the number two hero! He’s not a monster, he’s the coolest!” 

“I’ve seen him on TV,” his grandmother sniffed. “Always yelling and swearing. And Mr. Takeyoshi said he was very rude the other night. Not to mention all the damage he caused! Nothing but a foul-mouthed delinquent.” 

“Grandmaaaaa,” Tadashi whined. 

You sided more with Mrs. Kojima on this one, but the absolute adoration on the boy’s face made a small smile tug at your lips. 

But your amusement quickly faded as you glanced down at your phone again. 

6:58. 

Said foul-mouthed delinquent should be here any minute. 

As if your thoughts summoned him, the squeal of tires suddenly echoed through the otherwise quiet twilight, and you turned—with a pit in your stomach—to face the intersection down the road. Your street had been blocked off by barricades since the asphalt was still missing in patches, so the sleek, black car that had just pulled up was forced to park on the corner and put on its hazards. 

Your heart was hammering beneath your sternum, beating out a frantic, hummingbird rhythm, and you watched the car door get flung open, a lithe figure ducking out a moment later. The last rays of fading sunlight glinted off his ash blond hair before he pulled up his hood, but then he was looking in your direction, and even if he was too far to see the details of his face, you felt the instant his eyes locked onto you. 

“Holy shit, is that him?” Tadashi asked behind you, followed by a yelp as his grandmother smacked him with her cane. 

“Language,” she hissed, but the rest of her sentence was drowned out by the blood roaring through your ears as Dynamight started to walk toward you. 

No, not walk. Stalk. He looked like a predator slinking down the sidewalk, dressed in black and skimming through the shadows. There were a few people milling about the street, your neighbors who were still trying to clean up, but the pro hero paid them no mind. His gaze was still zeroed in on you, and your breath grew more shallow with each step he took. 

Don’t pass out, don’t pass out, you chanted in your head. And smile! Try not to look like he’s your executioner. 

You plastered on a smile, but it felt jagged like the broken street you stood on, your cheeks aching from the strain. 

Finally, after what felt like a blink and an eternity simultaneously, Dynamight came to a stop about ten feet away from you on the sidewalk. His hands were shoved in the pocket of his hoodie, his face was a cold mask on the tipping point of a scowl, and his eyes felt like red-hot embers burning into your face. 

“At least you know how to be punctual,” he said without preamble, his voice as sharp as his scarlet gaze. 

You heard Mrs. Kojima gasp behind you, followed by Tadashi frantically trying to shush her under his breath, so you cut the old lady off before she could say what was on her mind. 

“T-Thank you for taking the time to escort me to the agency, Dynamight,” you said, bowing at the waist so you could get a moment’s reprieve from those red eyes. “It’s… very kind of you, since I know you must be busy with your hero duties.” 

Mrs. Kojima harumphed behind you, and you took a deep breath to steady yourself before you straightened up. 

Dynamight’s crimson gaze had lost none of its intensity, but he finally seemed to notice Tadashi and his grandmother over your shoulder, and when he spoke, he’s tone was a fraction of a degree softer. 

“Yeah, well… it’s the least the agency can do,” he said evenly, like he’d memorized a script. 

You wondered if Kirishima had said something to him after they left. Or maybe the PR manager the red-haired hero had mentioned? 

Suddenly, you heard someone clear their throat behind you, and you winced. 

“Sorry, this is Mrs. Kojima and her grandson, Tadashi,” you said, motioning to them. “They’re some of my customers who just wanted to see me off.” 

“Customers,” Dynamight echoed as his red eyes raked over the pair. “For your stitching shop?” 

Something about his tone seemed off, but you couldn’t place it. 

“Alterations shop,” you corrected with a frown. “But yes.” 

“Is that all?” he asked as his eyes locked with yours, and you felt your insides liquify. 

Fuck. There was no way he could know that Mrs. Kojima and Tadashi had been “patients” of yours before. Right? Even if he knew about your quirk, that was a leap to make. 

Then again, it did sound kind of weird for two random customers to take an interest in their seamstress’ personal life. You’d set yourself up for that one. 

You opened your mouth, ready to clumsily explain, but Mrs. Kojima beat you to it. 

“I knew her grandparents long before you were a thought in your daddy’s brain boy,” the old lady huffed as she hobbled forward to stand beside you, Tadashi stumbling after her. “So I check on her from time to time, especially when she’s meeting and going off with some no-good delinquent at night. Is that alright with you?” 

“Mrs. Kojima—” you started as your eyes widened. 

“Grandma!” Tadashi hissed, his face flushing with mortification. 

Dynamight, for his part, actually smirked at the old lady’s attitude, amusement dancing in his red eyes as he finally shifted them off you. 

“Well, Stitches here is gonna be fine,” he said with a sharp smile. “She’ll be staying in our finest suite, being waited on hand and foot for the next few weeks.” 

Stitches? What the hell was that? Did he forget your name? 

“Is that so?” Mrs. Kojima narrowed her dark eyes on the blond, and her expression said she didn’t trust the pro hero as far as she could throw him. 

“Lucky,” Tadashi muttered under his breath. 

“If you don’t believe me, you can call her tomorrow and check for yourself,” Dynamight said before he turned to face you completely, effectively cutting off any rebuttal from the Kojimas. “Are you ready? It’s cold, and the car’s running.” 

“Y-Yes,” you stammered, shifting the strap of your duffle bag higher up on your shoulder. “J-Just a second.” 

You turned back to Mrs. Kojima, who was blatantly glaring daggers at Dynamight, but her expression softened as she shuffled in to hug you. 

“Watch out for him,” she whispered in your ear. “And take care of yourself. If something’s wrong, call me, no matter what. You can stay with me, okay?” 

“Thank you, but I’ll be fine,” you murmured as you pulled away. “I’ll call you when I know more about the shop’s repairs. Tadashi, take care of your grandma for me.” 

“Bah!” Mrs. Kojima scoffed, shooing you back with her cane. “I can take care of myself.” 

“I know.” You smiled as you grabbed the handle of your small rolling suitcase beside you. “Have a good night.” 

You turned back to Dynamight to find him suddenly beside you, the scent of burnt sugar enveloping you a moment later. You inhaled so fast it whistled through your teeth, but the pro hero didn’t even look at you as he slipped his finger through your duffle bag’s strap and pulled it off your shoulder. He slung it on his back in one fluid movement, and then he was reaching for your suitcase, too. 

“I-I got this one!” you said, a little too loudly, as you stumbled back a step and dragged the suitcase with you. “Thank you, but, um, I’ve got it.” 

Dynamight pursed his lips at you, his eyes narrowing into crimson slits, but then his gaze jumped over your shoulder. 

“Got something you want to say, kid?” he grunted, and he looked a little ridiculous with your pink and purple patterned duffle peeking out from over his shoulder. 

“M-Me?” Tadashi gaped and glanced around quickly like there was anyone else within half a block, but when he realized Dynamight was still staring at him expectantly, the boy began to ramble. “I-I just, uh, I just wanted to say I think you’re the coolest hero there is. Even more than Deku! Man, I wish I could have seen the fight the other night. You probably wiped the floor with that villain! When I grow up, I hope I’m a hero half as cool as you.” 

Dynamight actually seemed surprised by the boy’s adoring word vomit. The blond blinked as the suspicion and defensiveness drained from his face and posture, and then an easy smirk stretched across his lips. 

“You got a quirk, kid?” he asked. 

Mrs. Kojima made a face beside you like she was going to cut in, but you put a hand on her arm and gestured to Tadashi’s beaming face, and the old lady sighed and relented. She knew what this meant for her grandson. 

“Yeah, I do!” Tadashi grinned and puffed out his chest before he shifted the bag of food in his grasp and held out his right hand. His brow buckled in concentration, but a moment later a flame exploded to life in his palm. The flame grew, flickering upwards as it twisted and twined, changing shape as it went. In the blink of an eye, the teenager held the hilt of a fiery dagger, which he twirled around his knuckles. “I can make different objects with flames, and they act solid when I concentrate hard enough.” 

“That’s a pretty cool power,” Dynamight said as he eyed the flaming blade. “Bet you kick ass in your hero course.” 

“I-I do alright,” Tadashi said as he extinguished the dagger, trying to go for a nonchalant shrug, but the effect was ruined by his mile-wide grin and heart eyes. “You really think it’s cool?” 

“It’s only cool if you’re the best, so don’t slack off,” the blond scoffed. “Only losers half-ass their way through school.” 

Mrs. Kojima’s face was silently scandalized, but Tadashi’s grew determined. 

“Yes, sir!” the boy said as he bowed at the waist. “I’ll work hard to be the best of the best.” 

“Good.” Dynamight smirked. “Then, when you graduate, you can come prove how strong you are by taking me on. Who knows? If you’re actually strong, we might hire a new side-kick.” 

Tadashi looked like his eyes were going to pop out of his head as he straightened up, but the pro hero only snickered as he spun on heel and began to stride away. 

“You comin’, Stitches?” he called over his shoulder. 

“C-Coming!” you called back before you flashed the Kojimas one last smile. “Have a good night and be safe going home!” 

Then you took off down the sidewalk, your rolling suitcase clattering over the broken concrete behind you. 

Dynamight’s legs were twice as long as yours and quickly ate up the distance to his car still parked on the corner, and you only caught up to him as he was tossing your duffle in the trunk. 

You stood on the curb panting for a moment, just staring at him, and then the blond looked up and caught your eye. 

“What?” he grunted. 

“N-Nothing.” You cleared your throat and moved to pick up your suitcase, but he beat you to it, bending down and hefting the thing up in one fluid movement. The trunk slammed shut with a resounding thud, and the two of you were left staring at each other in silence. 

“Get in,” Dynamight finally said, jerking his chin at the passenger door. Then he walked around to the driver’s side, yanked open the door, and slid inside without another word. 

You could still feel the Kojimas’ eyes on your back, and you didn’t want to give them cause to worry, so you took a deep breath and got into the car. 

Even though your heart was trying to break free of your ribcage. 

The car itself was sleek and fancy, both inside and out. The seats were a supple red leather with ebony stitching, the dashboard shiny and inlaid with the newest gadgets, and you curled into the seat, afraid to even touch anything. This car was probably worth more money than you’d ever made in your entire life, and you had worked odd jobs since you were sixteen. 

The engine rumbled to life as Dynamight cranked the ignition, warm air blasting out of the vents and thawing your red nose and cheeks. The dash said it was only eighteen degrees Celsius, but the wind had been brisk. 

“Seatbelt,” the pro hero said as he yanked his own across his thick chest. 

You swallowed tightly before you did as you were bidden, and the second you were secured, the blond was throwing the car in gear and peeling away from the curb. Your barricaded street disappeared in a blur, and suddenly you were on your way. 

With Dynamight. Alone. In his car. 

The luxurious interior of the vehicle began to close in on you, feeling more like the walls of a coffin, and you braced yourself for Dynamight’s interrogation. 

Except… it never came. 

Minutes passed by in silence, and all the while, the blond’s red eyes stayed focused on the road ahead. One of his hands casually gripped the steering wheel, the other wrapped around the gear shift, and every one of the hero’s movements was fluid, precise. 

You tried not to, but you couldn’t help but study him out of the corner of your eye. His blank face gave nothing away, and neither did his slumped body language. He was covered in a dark hoodie and jeans again, so you couldn’t see much skin besides his hands and neck, but he looked… fine. 

One would have never guessed that he nearly bled to death beneath your hands two days ago. 

The memory of his blood, warm and tacky on your skin, made you clench your hands in your lap, and when you glanced over at the blond again, you nearly jumped out of your seat when you met red eyes. 

“Now you got somethin’ you want to say, Stitches?” he asked as he shifted gears, smoothly pulling around another car. 

“M-My name’s not Stitches,” you replied without thinking, but maybe this was a good thing. Thinking always got you in trouble. 

“Yeah, no shit,” the blond snorted, darting a quick look at you again before turning back to the road. “But you keep starin’ at me, so spit it out.” 

You fumbled for something to say, still thinking of his ashen face splattered with blood. “T-That was nice, what you said back there to Tadashi. He, um, really idolizes you, so you probably made his whole year.” 

“Tch.” Dynamight clicked his tongue as he looked in the rearview mirror. “Chances are, kid probably won’t end up as much.” 

You frowned. “But you said—” 

“I know what I said,” he cut you off, eyes meeting yours again. “And I meant it. Slacking off is for losers. Still, the brat will probably end up as a B-lister at most, more likely just an extra. That’s just the damn odds.” 

His words were harsh, but you knew they were true. There was no shortage of people signing up to be “heroes” in the world, but very few actually achieved the fame and notoriety of, say, All Might. Even years after his retirement, the Old Symbol of Peace was still talked about. 

“Well… thank you for not saying that to Tadashi,” you murmured as you averted your eyes out the window. 

“Someone will have to eventually,” Dynamight grunted. “But, if he proves me wrong, then he might actually have some potential.” 

“Mmm,” you hummed noncommittally. You didn’t want to talk about Tadashi anymore. Hell, you didn’t want to talk about anything. 

But you knew it was coming. You could feel the pro hero building up to it, the air in the car becoming more tense and charged by the second, like the calm before the storm. 

Part of you wished Dynamight would just rip the bandaid off already. 

The other part of you wondered if you would survive opening the car door and jumping from the moving vehicle, but at the speed the blond was driving, chances were slim. 

You were just thinking to pull out your phone and subtly look at the agency on the map to see how far away you were, but then Dynamight cleared his throat, and you felt all the saliva dry up in your mouth. 

This was it. 

“So,” the pro hero started as he pulled up to a stoplight, and his eyes found yours again. The red light reflected off his face and made it hard to tell where his irises began, everything washed out in crimson. 

But before he could get another word out, a loud growl split the interior of the car. 

Dynamight blinked at you before his gaze fell to your stomach, and you felt your face flare with heat. 

“Sorry,” you muttered as you clenched your abdomen, trying to shut it up, but it only growled louder in defiance. “I, um, forgot to eat dinner since I was busy packing.” 

And because your stomach had been in knots all day, but you didn’t need to tell him that. 

“Wasn’t that kid holding a whole bag of food back there?” Dynamight asked, frowning at you. 

“Y-Yeah.” You blushed even harder. Nothing escaped the pro’s notice, did it? “Mrs. Kojima had brought some stuff, but I didn’t know if there would be a place to store it in, um, whatever room I’m staying in. Plus, Tadashi is always hungry because of his hero course training, so it’s not like any of it will go to waste.” 

“You’ll starve yourself so some brat can stuff extras in his face?” the blond scoffed, and he looked at you like you were speaking another language. 

“I won’t starve,” you argued, a nervous laugh huffing out of you. “I-It’s one meal, and I ate a big lunch.” 

That was a lie, but maybe you could get away with a little one. 

Dynamight studied you for a long, silent moment, his face unreadable. Then the light turned green, and he clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. 

“Tch.” He flicked on his blinker and turned left, weaving down a set of smaller streets leading away from the city’s center, where you knew his agency was located. 

“Where… are we going?” you asked as you glanced out the window. “Is this a short cut to the agency?” 

“We’re not goin’ to the agency,” he said. 

Your heart skipped a beat, and some of your unease must have shown on your face, because the pro hero scoffed again. 

“Don’t get your panties in a twist. We’re stopping to get food first.” 

You blinked in surprise. Food? He was buying you dinner? 

“Y-You don’t have to do that,” you stuttered, awkwardly waving your hands in front of you. “Really, I’m fine.” 

“Well, I’m fuckin’ hungry, so I’m getting food. That alright with you, Stitches?” His red eyes flicked to the side and pinned you to your seat, and all you could do was nod. 

The car descended into silence again as Dynamight navigated through the streets, and a few minutes later, he was pulling up to a curb. The street around you was definitely in a better part of town than you were used to, but it didn’t look too fancy. A number of small restaurants dotted the road, interspersed by a couple bars, and a few dozen people roamed the sidewalks, laughing and stumbling and obviously having a good time. 

Dynamight stared out at the crowd through the windshield, a small sneer of disgust curling his upper lip, before he turned to you. 

“Stay here,” he said. No, ordered. “I’ll be right back, so don’t go anywhere.” 

“O-Okay,” you replied with a nod. 

He narrowed his eyes at you, as if trying to discern whether or not you were lying, but he must have been satisfied with what he found because he reached for the sunglasses that were casually thrown atop the dash. He slid them on before opening the car door and slipping out, but he paused before he closed it, bending down and poking his head back inside. 

“Any allergies?” he asked bluntly. “I don’t need you choking and dying on my leather seats.” 

“No allergies.” You shook your head. “Anything is fine.” 

A part of you still wanted to argue about him buying you food, but something told you that you would both lose the argument and succeed in pissing the blond off, which you were trying your best to avoid. 

Dynamight grunted in acknowledgement before he straightened, pulled up his hood, and slammed the car door. He took several strides away before he gestured back to the vehicle, and it was only when the locks engaged that you realized he’d taken the keys out of the ignition at some point. 

He really didn’t want you going anywhere. 

You exhaled shakily as you unclenched and clenched your fingers in your lap, trying to get some feeling back into them. Your thoughts kept threatening to spiral off down dark avenues, so you focused on watching the people outside the car. The windows were pretty tinted, besides the windshield, so you didn’t think people noticed you watching them go about their night. Everyone was happy and smiling, flushed with laughter and drink, and a yawning loneliness suddenly opened up inside you. Even back in America, you’d never had a lot of friends, but you had drinks a few times in college with classmates, and you missed going out to somewhere besides the grocery or craft supply store. You had thought you would have time to make new friends here in Japan, friends that you could try restaurants and bars with, but it hadn’t happened yet. 

And depending on what Dynamight had to say, it might not happen at all. 

You stewed in anxious silence for several minutes, but then the locks disengaged with a chirp, and the blond was sliding back into the driver’s seat, shoving a bulging plastic bag into your lap. 

“Here, don’t drop it,” he muttered as he jammed the keys back into the ignition. 

“I’ll just, um, set it on the floor,” you said as you shifted the bag down to the floorboards, holding it in place with your feet. The aromatic steam wafted out of the bag as you leaned over it, and your stomach snarled at the delicious scent of greasy meat and roasted vegetables. “This smells really good.” 

“Of course it does,” Dynamight sneered. “I’m not gonna eat shitty food.” 

“Only the best for the best,” you joked awkwardly. You blamed your sudden lightheadedness. When was the last time you ate? 

“Damn straight,” the blond huffed, yanking on his seatbelt before shifting the car into gear. “Can you make it five minutes without fainting?” 

“Yes?” you questioned more than stated, your brow furrowing. 

“Good, then hang on.” With that, the pro hero squealed away from the curb, merging into traffic seamlessly. 

Dynamight drove for several more minutes, but you didn’t ask where the two of you were going this time. The blond probably wouldn’t answer, and if he did, it would just be some kind of sharp retort, so you settled for staring out the window while making sure the food between your feet didn’t tip over. 

You hadn’t explored the city very much since you moved here, so most of what you passed by was foreign to you. But, just judging by the amount of lights and traffic around, you estimated that Dynamight was skirting the edge of the downtown area instead of going into it. You knew the general location of his agency, since you panic-Googled it earlier this afternoon, and while it was closer, the pro hero didn’t seem to be driving toward it. 

Eventually, Dynamight pulled up to the curb on an empty street and parked in the shadow of a tall office building. There was no sign on the façade to indicate a company, and only the dim emergency lights shone through the darkened windows, so it was obvious everyone had gone home for the day. Next door to the building seemed to be a small park, concrete and steel giving way to green grass and shadowed trees, but there was no one walking on this particular street. 

“Where are we?” you asked as you frowned out the tinted window. 

“Dunno,” Dynamight said before he opened his door, sliding out of the car without any more explanation. 

You blinked in confusion as he wrenched open your door a moment later, but he still didn’t say anything as he bent down to pick up the bag of food at your feet. 

“What do you mean you don’t know?” you asked. “You drove us here.” 

“By the time I answer all your questions, the food is gonna be cold,” the pro hero grunted, and he glared down at you still buckled into your seat. “Get out.” 

“We’re not eating in the car?” You didn’t mean to ask this many questions, you could tell it was irritating the blond, but you were just so… confused as to how you got to this point in your life. 

“I’m not about to let you ruin my damn leather seats,” Dynamight growled, stepping back to give you room. “Now get out of the damn car… please.” 

The last word sounded like it was dragged out of the hero against his will, painfully, and you wondered again if he was trying to be nicer because of all the negative media coverage. You didn’t think the blond gave a shit what the media thought, but Red Riot and their agency did, so maybe Dynamight was being forced to make an effort. 

“Are you seriously just going to gape at me like an idiot? Do your legs not work?” 

Well, what was that saying? You could lead a horse to water, but you couldn’t force it to drink. 

“S-Sorry,” you stuttered as you fumbled with your seatbelt, and you nearly twisted your ankle falling out of the car. 

“Fuckin’ hell, you’re as clumsy as shitty Deku,” Dynamight grumbled as he easily caught your elbow and kept you from faceplanting. 

This close, you could smell the caramelizing sugar scent that you finally realized emanated from the blond, and even through the sleeve of your sweater, you could feel the strength in the pro hero’s calloused fingers. 

Your face flushed with heat, but you were pretty sure he was tired of your stammered apologies, so you just stepped up onto the curb as he slammed the passenger door and locked the car. 

Then he turned to the tall office building and froze before a scowl twisted his features once again. 

“Shit,” he muttered under his breath, and his red eyes snapped to you. “You’re not afraid of heights are you?” 

“I… don’t think so,” you said with a frown. “I mean, I’ve been on roller coasters before, and I obviously flew here from America—” 

“Perfect,” the blond cut you off, shoving the bag of food at you again. “Take this.” 

“O-Okayyyy?” You tentatively wrapped your fingers around the plastic handles of the bag as you drew the food close to your chest. 

“Now, hop on,” he said as he turned around and crouched, his fingers starting to crackle with light and flares of heat. 

“Wh… what?!” Your whole body felt hot this time, not just your face. “Y-You want me… to get on your back?” 

“Again with the damn questions,” he growled, glaring over his shoulder at you. “If it will get you to move your ass faster, we’re eating on that roof, and unless you have wings under that sweater, I’m the only one who can get us up there, and I need my damn hands to use my quirk. So. Hop. On.” 

You gaped at the blond for a millisecond, a thousand more questions racing through your mind. Why the hell were you eating on a roof of a random building? Was this allowed? Why couldn’t you just go back to the agency? 

But you knew by the look on the blond’s face that he’d reached his limit with questions, so you could do nothing but comply. 

Just don’t think about it. Don’t think, don’t think, don’t think. 

You kept up this mantra in your head as you hesitantly approached the hero’s back. He had turned to look forward again, so at least his crimson eyes weren’t burning a hole into you as you carefully slid one hand onto his shoulder while you used the other to cradle the food against your stomach. 

You were just debating the best way to finish this embarrassing endeavor when you felt strong hands slide over the backs of your knees and pull you forward, startling a yelp out of you. 

“Jump,” Dynamight grunted, and you only had time to mindlessly obey as he straightened to his full height in one fluid motion. 

“Shit!” you couldn’t help but curse in English, hoping he couldn’t understand you. His hands helped to guide your legs around his waist, and you dug your left hand into his shoulder so you didn’t fall backward or crush the food that was nestled between the hero’s spine and your navel. 

A beat passed in silence as the two of you found your balance again. 

“I-I’m not too heavy, am I?” you murmured into the hero’s blond hair. Your throat felt tight with embarrassment, but when you went to swallow, your mouth was as dry as a desert. 

“Tch.” Dynamight clicked his tongue as he shifted your weight a little, his hands burning the backs of your thighs even through the thick denim of your jeans. “I could carry two of you without breaking a sweat. Don’t call me weak.” 

“I wasn’t!” you rushed to assure him. “I just meant—” 

“I know what you meant, shut up,” the blond cut you off, turning his head a fraction so his red eyes sliced into you. At this distance, his burnt sugar scent was almost overwhelming. “Do you have a good grip on me? And the food?” 

“Y-Yes,” you said as your heart began to pound against your sternum. You hoped he couldn’t feel it. 

“Make sure,” he growled, fingers digging into the backs of your thighs before he suddenly let go. 

A small gasp was ripped from you as you clenched your legs around his waist, and your left arm went from clutching his shoulder to wrapping around his neck. 

“Ack! Don’t choke me!” he huffed as he stretched his throat out of the way. 

Your right hand scrambled down a few inches, and you fisted the front of his hoodie, anchoring yourself across his chest as you sucked in your gut, leaned more into his spine, and tried not to crush the bag of food that was steadily making you sweat. 

“I-Is that okay?” you asked, your voice no more than a timid whisper. 

“Fine,” Dynamight said as he dropped his hands down by his hips, his palms crackling with energy once again. “Don’t fucking let go.” 

“I wo—OHHHH!” Your sentence trailed off into a startled scream as the hero suddenly exploded off the ground. 

His quirk made your ears ring, but you didn’t even have time to process that before you were thirty feet in the air. Every muscle in your body locked up in terror, and you were sure Dynamight was going to have bruises on his ribs from your legs clamping down around him like a vise. The wind tore at your hair and clothes, stinging the exposed skin of your face and neck, and you ducked your head against the hero’s blond hair as you clenched your eyes shut. 

Don’t let go, don’t let go, you chanted in your mind. 

Then, as suddenly as it began, it was over, and you heard Dynamight extinguish his quirk an instant before his boots slammed into concrete. 

The two of you stood there for a moment as you panted against the back of his neck, your hammering heart still lodged in your throat, before the blond patted the side of your thigh. 

“You can get down now,” he said. “But don’t drop the damn food.” 

You peeled open your eyes with a shaky exhale, and you could feel your entire body trembling as you slowly slid down from the hero’s back. The crinkling bag drew your attention, and you had a split-second worry that you had crushed the food in your terror, but a quick inspection showed that while the containers were a little crumpled, no food was leaking out. 

“Come on, I’m hungry,” Dynamight muttered before his boots started to crunch away from you. 

You snapped your head up and blindly followed after the blond, your eyes darting to the ground to make sure you didn’t trip over anything and then up to your surroundings to try and figure out where the hero was leading you. 

The answer, apparently, was to the very edge of the roof, and you wondered if the hero was going to make you hop on the Dynamight Express again, but instead he came to a stop beside a large electrical box. To your shock, he opened a small door on the tall metal rectangle and produced a thick, dark colored blanket, which he then threw down on the roof’s gravel. 

“Sit,” he grunted before he flopped to the ground, sighing as he stretched his legs out in front of him. 

There was about four or five feet between the electrical box and the edge of the roof, but the soles of Dynamight’s boots nearly brushed against the roof’s wall. 

Or they would have, if a three-foot section of the cement wall wasn’t missing right in front of him. The edges of the concrete partition looked suspiciously charred black, and you frowned at the sight. 

“Did you… blast a chunk out of this wall?” you asked as you slowly sank to your knees beside the blond. You were painfully aware of the void of protection in front of you, and you knew you were at least ten to fifteen stories above the street. But at least it wasn’t so cold up here, tucked into this little nook with the six-foot tall hero’s body heat helping to warm the air. 

“It was in the way,” Dynamight sneered, leaning over and snatching the plastic bag from where you had set it between the two of you. “And wipe that look off your face. I’m not gonna push you through the hole, and you’re not gonna fall with me here.” 

He didn’t look at you as he said this, too busy pulling out several food containers and spreading them out on the blanket, but the absolute surety, the confidence, in his voice actually eased some of the tension from your shoulders, and you sighed as you shifted onto your butt and leaned back against the electrical box. 

Now that you were seated in front of the hole, you realized this building gave you the perfect vantage point to the east. Most of the other structures were shorter than the one you currently sat on, so the streets stretched out before you like a map. The night sky was clear above you, devoid of clouds, nothing but a dark purple canvas sprinkled here and there with stars. But the moon was nearly full over your head, and its pale light was just enough to see by. You could see cars several blocks away cruising through the pools of lamplight, people waiting at bus stops or walking down the road to their next destination, and a realization came over you. 

“Oh, I see,” you murmured, still staring out at the view. “You must use this building as a perch during your hero patrols, right? You can see a lot from here.” 

“No shit.” Dynamight rolled his eyes as he opened one of the take-out containers. The smell of a well-made yakisoba hit your nostrils, and you watched as the blond ripped open a pair of chopsticks. He must have felt your gaze, though, because his red eyes snapped up and narrowed on you with a glare. “Quit starin’ at me and eat something. I didn’t go through all this damn trouble for nothing.” 

“R-Right.” You cleared your throat as you glanced between the other take-out boxes. “Was there something for me in particular, or…” 

“Just pick something!” he snapped before he shoved a bite of noodles into his scowling mouth. 

You pursed your lips as you reached for the closest container, flipping up the lid to find nearly a dozen yakitori skewers. Your stomach snarled and cramped as the roasted scent of the chicken filled your nose, and you could feel saliva pooling in your mouth. 

Grease immediately began to stain your fingers as you picked up one of the skewers, but you didn’t even care as you brought the kebab to your lips. You took a tentative bite to find the meat still pleasantly warm, but then a groan rumbled in the back of your throat as the flavor exploded across your tongue. 

“Mmmm, that is so good!” you mumbled around a mouthful as you ravenously tore off another bite. “It’s seasoned perfectly, and I like the bit of spice it has.” 

“Told you I don’t eat shitty food,” the blond scoffed before he reached over and snagged a piece of yakitori for himself. 

You couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corner of your mouth, but you quickly covered it up by taking another bite of chicken. 

“Thank you for the meal, Dynamight,” you said once you finished the skewer, reaching for one of the other containers. This one turned out to be another plate of yakisoba, and you eagerly pulled it into your lap. 

Silence settled between the two of you for a minute, punctuated by the sounds of you both quietly chewing, before Dynamight broke it again. 

“Katsuki.” 

“Hmm?” you asked around a mouthful of noodles. When you lifted your head, your eyes clashed with glaring red ones barely two feet away, and you swallowed quickly so you wouldn’t choke. “Sorry, what did you say?” 

“My name,” he grunted before ripping into another skewer, white teeth flashing in the pale moonlight. “It’s not Dynamight. It’s Katsuki Bakugo.” 

Another hot flash broke out across your body as his scarlet eyes bored into you, and you dropped your gaze to your lap. The blond was too close, his burnt sugar scent still strong beneath the aroma of food, and your brain struggled to come up with a response. 

“Katsuki Bakugo,” you murmured because you couldn’t help yourself, testing out the syllables on your tongue. 

You thought you saw the hero twitch out of the corner of your eye, but he might have just been taking another bite. 

“Yeah, and you better remember it,” the blond said after a moment, his tone adamant, commanding. 

Like there was any way you could forget his name. Japan’s Number Two Hero wasn’t exactly forgettable. 

You found it a little funny, though, that he was so weird about his own name after refusing to call you anything but “Stitches” so far. 

“I will,” you murmured, darting a glance at Dynamight—Katsuki? No, that felt too familiar. Bakugo, then—to find him still staring at you. 

The blond’s crimson gaze was piercing, pinning you to the spot, and you couldn’t look away. You thought he was going to say something, but his eyes only roamed over your face silently, like he was searching your features for an answer to a question he hadn’t voiced. His scrutiny unnerved you, made you fidget, and you played with your chopsticks to try and quell some of your nervous energy. 

Still, he didn’t say a word, but his red eyes began to narrow bit by bit. 

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore, and you opened your mouth to say something, anything, before he beat you to it. 

“You have a healing quirk.” 

The words hit you like a sledgehammer. 

Your heart slammed to a stop in your chest, and you inhaled so fast it was almost a scream. A million thoughts, excuses, and lies scrambled through your head, but the hero didn’t even give you time to grasp at any of them. 

“Don’t deny it,” he said, face twisting into his usual scowl. “Fuckin’ hate liars. I know you have a healing quirk.” 

The blunt confirmation, after so long worrying, felt almost like a relief, but it was quickly followed by a deluge of dread. 

He knew, he knew, he knew. The truth blared through your head like a siren. There really was no running from it now. 

“Well?” Dynamight—Bakugo—demanded as he glared at you. “Are you going to answer?” 

“You didn’t ask me a question.” The words fell from your mouth without your permission, and you winced as the blond’s expression darkened. 

“Fine,” he growled. “Do you have a healing quirk or not?” 

“…yes.” There was nothing else for you to say, so you just stared at the pro hero as the noose tightened around your neck. 

“I knew it.” A wild smirk stretched across Bakugo’s mouth, triumphant and proud. 

“How?” you couldn’t help but ask as you clenched your hands in your lap, the food long since forgotten. Your stomach was churning itself into knots anyway, but a morbid part of you just had to know what was the final nail in the coffin that had sealed your fate. 

“How what? Did I figure it out?” the blond asked as he lazily picked up another skewer and took a bite, like he didn’t have a care in the world. Like he didn’t hold your whole world in the palm of his calloused hand. “Because I’m not a blind idiot.” 

“I’m serious,” you said with a frown, digging your nails into your palms. 

“So am I,” Bakugo scoffed, and his red eyes found yours again. “If you’re going to lie, at least do it right. That night in your apartment, you said I wasn’t really hurt, didn’t bleed that much, but your hands and my clothes were soaked with it. Way too much for the stupid paper cuts or whatever you blamed it on. The burns on my left arm were better off than they should have been, too, but I knew you were lying before I even noticed any of that shit. I knew the second you opened your mouth.” 

You cringed with guilt, dropping your gaze to your fidgeting fingers. So, all your lies had been futile from the start. “Was it something in my tone or…?” 

“Well, stuttering over your words with your guilty ass face didn’t do you any favors, but no,” the blond grunted. “It wasn’t your tone, it was…” 

Here, the pro hero trailed off, and he was quiet for so long that you chanced a glance at him. 

Bakugo was frowning off into the distance, staring out over the city without seeing. You could tell he was struggling with something, and since you were obviously a masochist, you pressed him about it. 

“It was…?” you led and then had to stifle a gasp as the blond snapped his head around to glare at you. 

“You can’t say shit about this,” he snarled and bared his teeth like a cornered animal, and you distantly noted that his canines were more pointed and pronounced than what was usual. Then his next words stabbed into you, sharp and serrated, and dragged you back to the conversation. “Do you hear me, Stitches? You don’t say shit to anyone. If you do, I’ll kill you.” 

You blanched at the seriousness of his tone, the sharpness of his eyes, and a nervous laugh was startled out of you. 

“I’m obviously not in a position to say anything against you, Dyna—er, Bakugo,” you said, adding the “-sama” honorific after his name as a show of deference. “You could have me arrested or even deported for using my quirk on you without permission or a license.” 

“Damn right I could,” he huffed as he narrowed his eyes at you, but some of the tension and anger left the lines of his face. “But I’m not gonna do any of that shit because I need—you are going to help me.” 

“Help you?” you echoed in an incredulous tone. “What could I possibly help you with?” 

Bakugo glared at you as the muscle in his jaw worked, like he was chewing over his words, before he finally spat them out. 

“My ears. The reason I knew you were lying immediately was because I could hear you.” 

Your frown deepened as you processed his words. “You remember losing your hearing?” 

“Remember it?” The blond scowled at you. “What the fuck are you talking about? Of course I remember being fuckin’ deaf!” 

“I-I’m sorry,” you stammered, waving your hands in front of you. “I just—right after you crashed through my window, you woke up for a second, but you were disoriented. I was trying to tell you that you beat the villain before I saw the blood coming out of your ears and realized you must have blown your eardrums. Then you passed out, and when you woke up again, a-after I… healed you, you asked about the villain a second time, so I just assumed you didn’t remember waking up the first time.” 

Bakugo frowned at you, pale eyebrows furrowing over crimson eyes. “I woke up more than once? Yeah, I don’t remember that shit.” 

“Wait…” You blinked and pursed your lips as you tried to understand what he was saying. “If you don’t remember that, how do you remember losing your hearing?” 

“Because my hearing was shot to shit before I even ran into that damn villain,” Bakugo growled, and his face tightened again as he turned away from you. “Couldn’t even hear my quirk activate anymore.” 

He held up his hand to demonstrate, and flashes of light crackled to life in his palm like mini fireworks. The hero’s expression grew strange as he stared at the visual manifestation of his quirk, but then he clenched his fist and extinguished the sparks. 

Meanwhile, you felt your jaw gape open as your eyes widened. “You… how long has your hearing been in decline?” 

The blond ground his jaw so hard you could hear the scrape of his teeth, and he glared off into the middle distance for so long that you just assumed he wasn’t going to answer you. 

Then… 

“Fuckin’ years, I dunno,” he muttered as he pulled one of his long legs up, balancing his forearm against his knee and pressing his mouth into the back of his wrist. “Didn’t notice it at first, but it probably started at UA, once I was able to use my quirk more regularly.” 

Ohhh, of course. Your eyes dropped to the clenched fist in his lap, and you remembered the boom that made your ears ring as the hero flew you both up here. It had been so loud, and to think of experiencing that multiple times a day, at close range, for years apparently since you knew UA was a famous high school here in Japan… 

“Did you see a doctor?” You frowned, glancing up at the blond as his gaze snapped back to yours. 

“Tch, doctors,” Bakugo sneered, disgust glinting in his crimson eyes. “Fuckin’ useless pieces of shit. I left a good-for-nothing white coat’s office the afternoon I ran into that asphalt villain. Idiot doctor said most of my hearing was just gone, I was going to lose the rest, and there was shit all he could do. Then, few hours later, you patched me up in fuckin’ seconds, so I know that bastard was full of shit.” 

All you could do was blink rapidly at the pro hero as you tried to process all this information. Japan’s Number Two Hero had been going deaf for years, and no one had noticed? You knew that would have definitely made the news, let alone the gossip magazines. What’s more, a doctor said his hearing was a lost cause, and yet… 

“How well can you hear now?” you asked, curiosity getting the best of you. You hadn’t even intended to heal his ears that night, it had just been a side effect of you dumping your energy into his body in order to keep him breathing. 

“Dunno, haven’t exactly done a hearing test,” the blond scoffed and rolled his eyes. “But I can hear you just fine, my phone, too, and my quirk. I’d say that’s good enough.” 

You pursed your lips in thought, studying the hero like he’d been studying you all night, and then you remembered what had started this whole conversation. 

“Okay…” you said slowly. “Well, if you’re hearing is… fine now, what am I supposed to help you with?” 

“Keeping it that way, obviously.” He glared at you. “You’re gonna be stuck at the agency for the next few weeks anyway, so you need to make sure my ears stay working.” 

You gaped at the pro-hero, wondering if you were suddenly losing your hearing. 

“M-Me?” you stammered as your heart crawled up your throat. “B-But I… I’m not a doctor.” 

“No shit,” he said, apparently a favorite phrase of his, and he looked at you like you were a particularly dumb child. “I don’t need a doctor, I told you they’re fuckin’ useless. I just need your quirk.” 

“But…” you trailed off in disbelief. Out of all the outcomes you’d envisioned for this night, this had never even crossed your mind as anything in the realm of possibility. “I’m… not a hero. I don’t have a license to use my quirk.” 

Bakugo stared at you in silence for an endless moment before his upper lip curled into a snarl. 

“Do you think I’m an idiot?” he hissed. “I know all that!” 

“W-Well, I don’t know what you want then!” you said, your voice rising in pitch and volume to match his. 

The echoes of your words ricocheted around you before they faded off into the night, and the blond clenched his jaw as he glared at you. 

“I want you to use your quirk anyway,” he said, the low growl of his tone vibrating through you. You opened your mouth to argue, but he cut you off mid inhale. “And don’t start bitching about rules. You’ve been using your quirk illegally already. That kid and his old hag of a grandma are patients of yours, aren’t they?” 

Your jaw snapped closed with an audible click, and a smirk bloomed across the blond’s pale lips. 

“Hah,” he snorted. “Knew it.” 

“I didn’t say anything,” you gritted out, and your breathing grew shallow. 

“You didn’t have to,” he said, his smirk taking on a taunting edge. “You really gotta work on your poker face, Stitches.” 

Your vision started to tunnel, interspersed with flashes of Tadashi and Ayano’s faces. “The Kojimas have nothing to do—” 

“Oh, calm the fuck down,” he cut you off as he rolled his eyes again. “I’m not gonna turn a grandma and a kid into the cops. Especially not for doing the same shit we’re going to do.” 

A knot of tension unraveled beside your heart, but your insides still felt more tangled up than a yarn ball being batted around by a crazed kitten. 

“Thank you,” you murmured with a sigh, dropping your eyes to where your fingers were picking at the frayed hem of your sweater. 

“I don’t need your gratitude,” he scoffed. “I just need—” 

“My quirk.” You were the one to cut him off this time, and you lifted your gaze to his again. 

“Yeah,” he said as he narrowed those scarlet eyes at you like a predator zeroing in on its prey. “So, is that your way of saying you’ll do it?” 

You bit your lip as you considered your options, but really, you didn’t have any. Dynamight was a famous, rich pro hero with all the leverage. He could ruin your life… but he wasn’t. He was instead providing a trade. 

His silence for your quirk. 

The Kojimas flashed through your mind again, as did your other “patients,” as the blond called them. You thought of your parents, too, and your grandparents. If you agreed to the hero’s proposition, you wouldn’t have to return to America as a failure, and after a few weeks, you could reopen your family’s legacy shop. 

And, in the meantime, you still got to use your quirk. You could heal, actually be useful. Even more than that, Japan’s Number Two Hero was relying on you. 

You didn’t know if you were up to the task, having never used your quirk beyond minor instances that were usually days or weeks in between each other. 

But… 

“Yes,” you finally said as you looked up into Katsuki Bakugo’s face. “I’ll help you.” 

You just hoped you didn’t hang yourself in the process.

[qsphyxias]

any passing tips? congrats!

first of all, i love your username

second of all, thank you

third of all, i have so many get ready

warning: this is for transmasc people because i don't know any transfem people and im not transfem so i cant give my input on that, this is for if you want to be cis-passing, probably enforcing a little toxic masculinity honestly, also this is heavily based on my own experiences so far so this may not apply to everyone. and like i said, this is for people who want to be cis-passing, the tips are kind of aggressive.

first! something reallly important i learned about binding; flat chests are not super duper natural, though it still passes, it's still not as natural as a cis guys' chest because!!! guys have pecs. seriously, if you see small bumps under your binder, that is fine, actually, it may be better than a flat chest. flat chests are fine too, but tbh having small bumps as pecs is more convincing.

wear the waistband of your pants on your lower hip

for stance, put your hands in your pocket and slouch your back. if you want, try to walk with the tips of your toes aiming to the opposite sides of each other?? like, an opposite catwalk

take up more space, if you have a backpack, hold on the straps and bring them closer to your chest

like this ^^

lower your voice, it's okay if it sounds weird or fake, just fucking do it. you have to be confident, look confident, and even smell confident. don't think, just do. it'll be easier for it to be more natural that way.

say stuff like, "nah, bro, bruh, my bad, yo" be really chill, and really confident but not overconfident. i usually just act like a stoner or a fuckboy, or if it helps, just kinda watch what cis guys do and absorb those traits, and mimic them. that's what i do.

don't have too many manners, but like, apologize when you need to. if you bump into someone in the hallway, give them a quick nod or acknowledgement and keep going, or pretend you didn't see anything. if it's an awful bump, then ofc apologize but if not, just brush past them.

if you have a resting bitch face, that's bonus points. don't make too many facial expressions or any exaggerated tone while you talk. your face should have a neutral facial expression, like a bored, focused, tired, or occasionally smiling expression when your friend has something funny or hilarious. don't suppress your feelings, just change how you probably look when you are expressing those feelings, at least to an extent.

this happens a lot to me but like, when i'm really in the zone, or when im laughing, my voice tends to go higher pitched, and this is the case for maybe a few months but one you practice deepening your voice and changing your mannerisms, it'll go away because you'll go into habit.

also! a tip to lower your voice; when you wake up in the morning, make sure that the first word you say after you wake up is really low, because that helps set the bar and the octave of where you will start speaking in for the rest of the day.

idk if this actually helps but i don't ever drink water and that makes my voice rlly raspy in the morning, i'm convinced thats why it's so easy to skip a few notes down into a lower voice but like idk you should still drink water (and apparently when you're on T, you need to drink a lot of water)

also, another thing, start speaking from your chest and your stomach, not your nose- if that makes sense? sometimes i think it's not even about the tone, it's literally about the depth of your voice. so like, just make your voice heavier ig? but if you're in high school like me, don't make it too deep because you're supposed to be having voice puberty right about this point (i usually throw in some fake and some real voice cracks but idk if that helps or not, it's just fun)

if you're worried about height, which tbh i don't think is much of a problem, you can buy those gel shoe lift thingies and hide them in your shoe

i'm gonna be honest with you, being fashionable is seen as feminine, and it really sucks, but that doesn't mean you have to stop looking fashionable if you want to be seen as a guy, if that makes sense? cis guys usually just wear sweatpants and 7-day old hoodies, they don't have much of a style (in high school at least) but nowadays there are more fashionable guys. just, know that if you want to look more fashionable and like, really good, it will make you look a little less cis passing.

but tbh this is not super true, it's just from my experience

painting your nails is fine. mild jewelry is fine.

probably better to use men's deodorant, shampoo, conditioner etc.

consume a lot of media with heavily masc characters, aka men that you look up to/favourite characters, etc. just so you can take in their traits and hopefully raise yourself to be more masculine.

have a big group of guy friends to blend in, otherwise, you can just be that gay guy in a group of girlfriends(but you'll be the token gay friend, and honestly it's not great), but tbh i suggest having a bigger group of guy friends, or just have one trusted guy friend. trust me, this is crucial. (at first it was crucial, now idk)

another thing to make sure, make sure that guy friend doesn't know you're trans, and thinks you're a cis guy. trust me on this, you need one guy friend. just one, and you're set for life.

girls typically can tell if you're trans, and it's a higher percentage to get misgendered by them rather than guys bc they just dont care ig.

ANOTHER THING!! this is kind of a stupid tip, but another passing tip is to literally not care. throw away any self-esteem, any worries about whatever you're doing, but at the same time be mildly aware. be in the habit.

if you do get misgendered, don't say "my pronouns are actually__" instead say, "huh? im a guy."

saying "my pronouns are" heavily imply that you're part of the lgtbtq+ community and guys might make fun of you for it.

^ this doesn't apply if you're talking to lgbtq+ people.

if a guy sits next to you, don't get nervous. just manspread lol.

try to make yourself more comfortable around guys, even if it's tough.

guys are going to want to do a cool handshake as a greeting if they feel like they're your closer friend so get ready for that

if someone deadnames you, look confused and ignore them (don't get defensive, unless necessary)

if someone asks why you're in the guy's locker room/bathroom, look confused (don't get defensive)

^^ when you walk into the guys' bathroom, walk in with your guy friend, don't be nervous, act natural.

this is just a disclaimer, i'm super biased so warning for that below.

there are basically two choices to have when you want friends as a transmasc/trans guy

have a (small or big) group of lgbtqia2s+ friends who have been through it, and understand your own gender struggle, it's a higher chance they will never misgender you because they know how it feels.

- they are definitely more fun, and better than the other choices

- you can find these people in an lgbtq+ club or you can hunt them down

have a group of friends that have a majority of guys or just have one friend that is a dude. they will not misgender you, they will not even think about it because they see you as their "pack"

- but there are consequences for this, you will probably have to sell your soul because there's a chance, they are probably homophobic or transphobic, not a huge chance, but still a chance

- they will attack you in a playful but painful way

- you will absorb their toxic (masculinity) traits (they're not all toxic)

- but you will also absorb their passing masculine traits

do not be friends with cis, straight girls unless you are 100% sure they are true allies, and see you as who you are — there are people like that, but they are r a r e (this only applies if they know you're trans)

^^the she/they's don't count, the she/they's are awesome (sometimes)

- if you do decide to be friends with cishet girls, they will likely infantilize you (my own bias and experience)

^^this doesn't apply if you already have cis girl-friends that you've known for a long time and you know they respect you and support you.

- the cishet girls (who know you're trans) will not treat you like a guy, they will treat you like another friend that's a girl (based on my own experience, it's not great)

(again, this is just my own bias, and based on my experience)

THIS IS NOT ALWAYS THE CASE THOUGH!! I made these observations based on this one girl that was basically a piece of shit to me, we're not friends anymore dw (also this is outdated)

[sugar-petals]

Baekhyun Doms You: Ending Up Laughing

↳⎡NOTE.⎦thought this’d be an interesting concept & a different side to smut: what if you try things out and it’s both not your thing? w/ a humorous twist and subby bf moments sprinkled in 😄

♡  words. 4k

+ tags ⚠️ pwp hc, bondage, throatfucking, graphic, cum play, unsafe/clumsy practice: do not recreate, degradation, biting, masochist bbh, domme!reader switches unsuccessfully, whips, hair-pulling

imagine that. a wide-eyed baekhyun pacing and tiptoeing in front of your toy shelf, trying to pick a riding crop he fancies. it takes five minutes and several ‘uhh, ohh’ confused puppy noises until he’s able to decide which one he’s taking. 

...literally even if he knows exactly which one does what. you’ve used all of them on him. 

meanwhile, you take three seconds flat to pull out one that fits your mood and proceed to edge the living shit out of him. yes, without literal further ado. teasing his dick and marking his thighs and doing all kinds of delicious things. 

he’s still going back and forth in his head without having even started out. cutely tapping and swaying from one foot to the other. 

it’s like he’s back to school. priceless.

what’s even more hilarious: baekhyun practices random mean facial expressions while trying to decide. he doesn’t seem to be sure what character he’s going for. it feels like he’s rehearsing for a concert or photoshoot, even. absolutely fascinating to watch. 

i mean he’s absolutely photogenic no doubt about that but

you’re sitting on the bed waiting naked like okay is this gonna be william shakespeare deluxe or what is kyoong channelling over there

“um... i think i got it! this one, okay? i’m ready!”

finally he walks over, strutting with his nose in the air and his eyes glaring, muscles tense, a mysterious bad boy charm about him, whip ready to sting, lips tight and punitive...

....and hits his pinky toe on the bed

oh the pain

great master baekhyun flops headfirst into the sheets processing the existential cruelty of bedpost pinewood and needs head pats to recover

lots of head pats

at least twenty of them

so many head pats

more time passes until kyoong is back in character i guess

you probably could have listened to exo’s whole discography in the meantime

and knitted a rug for taemin’s new flat

anyway

baekhyun tries to act very confidently finally getting into it 

adopting a sharp ‘hmph’ kind of tone 

endlessly teasing your back and thighs with the riding crop

so far so good sir pinky toe

but he just goes on and on

you could actually crochet a pair of socks for chen’s daughter now that you think about it

it’s you who has to tell him to get to the point and it’s clear he’s more nervous than he pretends to show

to be fair he’s not the only one

you try to get yourself mentally ready but you find yourself giving him actual orders and even correcting his stance five times cuz he’s so wobbly on the mattress like a pupper indeed

baekhyun mumbles to himself and has a hard time fully implementing the advice on posture but tries to aim well regardless. it seems to work at first

but tragically

he ends up with a miss, hitting his own thigh rather than your ass and moans out loud

now you’re the one confused because you were waiting for the whip to come down

but nope it went elsewhere did it

you wonder how he managed to do all that furious fencing in the obsession mv with an aim like that

looks like he’s so submissive, he straight up whips himself

taking matters into his own hands is he. subs these days.

baekhyun keeps on being wobbly on the bed and looks like he ran a marathon already

may i remind you that this guy does 3-hour long concerts and can practice throughout an entire night

... you both agree to immediately scratch that completely after his next flailing strike sends the riding crop flying into his unsuspecting, non-consenting plushie collection

animal cruelty

moving on

you figure that a change of location might be a good idea

baekhyun sits you down on a chair and bashfully stores away the yeeted whip

he vows to never use a riding crop again already and his teddy bears are thankful for it

now the whole plushie village and whole china knows how you don’t do it

next up is rope

what could possibly go wrong

he practiced wrist bondage on his own ankles for five days straight, you really prepared a lot of things to test out together today 

and he’s seen you tie him up over and over and over

but whatever it is that he manages to install on your arms 

looks like a piece of very experimental modern art that just sold for half a million at sotheby’s

what’s supposed to be a column tie is nothing but a mere... ball

chaotic like baekhyun’s personality. not surprising at all

wait that rhymed

anyhow

even alexander the great couldn’t have cut this gordian knot of a tangly masterpiece

ironically: while baekhyun’s roughly grabbing your chin for an intense kiss... the rope casually falls apart harder than the soviet union in 1991 my loves, you ain’t ready

baekhyun takes ages to notice while he’s teasing and kissing you and ends up sweating bullets when he realizes that the sublime art fell to pieces.

sorry comrade 

the fantasy knots and artistic freedom increases even more when it comes to putting a collar and leash on you

and his guy is supposed to be a dog owner? mongryong, instruct your man

baekhyun is a flustered mess trying to fasten it on you even if he tries very hard to be concentrated

maybe it’s because you’re watching him with literal hawk eyes checking every move (...hoping he learned something from you oh my). you’re not really melting into your role either, huh. the only thing melting is your pussy because baekhyun is acting so embarrassed which is the actual turn-on

if that doesn’t give you away

the leash comes off in two minutes time after baekhyun miraculously ties his own hands together with it

how the fuck did that happen

how do you even manage to do that

eager are we

after whipping his own thigh, self-domination 2.0 i guess

so whipping and bondage are off the programme 

this has been the most chaotic and hazardous attempt at topping in the history of sm entertainment

and they’re literally called s and m

...humiliation is next

when you planned your session you both figured hey he’s tested and tried by exo’s lively debate culture and he might be able to pull that off

and there are no props involved so he’ll have an easy time right

life is an illusion

you find out he can’t pronounce degrading names clearly because he keeps on stuttering them. which in return makes baekhyun crack up. 

carrying on the joke, you correct him every time. 

“i want you to repeat after me: stupid, slutty, bitch.”

it ends up as you doing what you always do 

teaching and training him while baekhyun either shyly or brattily obliges. you don’t even notice how you’re doing it but from the outside, it’s blatantly obvious.

because your brain is still feeling in domme mode, you also find yourself saying the usual things to him without thinking, even when he grabs you and gives orders. “now bend over! i’m gonna fuck your brains out.” — “okay, cutie!” 

which causes baekhyun’s mean face to collapse and he snap out of his command tone immediately, snorting because it’s the last thing he expected

he tries to carry on by punishing you with an actual mouth gag and a harness he can hold onto while fucking you from behind, i mean your pussy is already wet why not

guess what’s gonna ensue

wearing a harness feels kind of strange and new so you wiggle back and forth and all over the place. like what is this, what’s happening. baekhyun’s dick is going into all kinds of directions my friends, the amusement park carousel surely inspired this fucking style right here. 

and wearing a gag — there’s a way different person who needs to have this in his chatty mouth. 

kai and kyungsoo’s dream would come true and yet you’re the one gagged 

something ain’t right

if you’re honest. you’re feeling so weird being on the other end of punishment tonight and not being able to give him any directions. your dom brain is worrying he’s all left to his own devices trying to drive that confused dick home left and right and above and below and diagonal and crosswise. 

the fuck

your poor guts my god

what’s worse: his stamina is gonna sneak up behind him and tap on his shoulder like... bro that’s enough pounding for a whole month please spare these balls from deflating please do not break this device

to which your pussy agrees in unison

how are you gonna love your bub day in day out if you’re that sore

there’s nothing more frustrating than being sore and horny with byun baekhyun at your disposal

or a knocked out boyfriend trying to generate at least a sprinkle of semen after getting completely emptied in one go

probably sleeping for three days straight

alright so the harness and gag come off fast oh dear baekhyun clears those away in a heartbeat

that’s another point off the list 

the more you know

carousel cringe dicking down type of dominance... bizarre, disorderly, totally erratic, not on the agenda, worst rated on bing 

comrade baekhyun keeps on apologizing for making things so messy even if he tries and tries

you’re both so puzzled because you’re used to something so different and need a water chugging pause

baekhyun hasn’t sweated this hard since doing the MAMA choreography

and your pussy has never had to provide this much lubrication at once

where on earth is both of your usual stamina what happened

if a type of sex exhausts you fast and even baekhyun’s balls are suddenly moody you just know you’re wired in the opposite way

safe to say you’re better at giving and baekhyun is better at taking

leave the multidirectional powerfucking to kai or something

and being orderly to xiumin

another rug could have been knitted my friends 

moving on dot org

so, you both figure to take it easier and try to go with something he usually does in passing. you know, turning a typical baekhyun habit into something you can try out casually in bed so he can tease you.

that one should work out right?

proceed: teeth action. you seated, him positioning himself above you. after your approval baekhyun pulls your hair back to expose your neck — so he can deliciously bite into it (or so was the plan). 

reality: his hand gets tangled up completely. 

while he’s busy nibbling and giggling about like a lil’ bunny chomping at a carrot that turns out to be extremely ticklish herself. 

in fact, you start squeaking out a wonky high pitch, startling baekhyun’s fine musical ear to the bone by the obvious atonality. did she just try to outsing my vocal range with a creaking whistle note? 

mariah carey would cancel you on twitter over this one

that’s how you turn a vicious, possessive bite into an eternal meme

every time either of you go for a neck kiss, you end up imitating each other. baekhyun has immortalized himself as a nervous chomping bunny and you as the vocalist anti-christ

lord have mercy

you miss your old sex life already and it’s only been two hours

cause you see... if baekhyun gives you the chance to bite him? he needs a set of long sleeves, scarves, and an extra soft pillow to sit down on for the next two days

like, no mercy bitch

you get right down to business and ravage him and do it properly until he cums in his pants

sure, the way he uses his tongue now is definitely kinda hot mind you

baekhyun is always good with his singing equipment that doesn’t suddenly change aye

and you keep your eyes closed

but with time you notice that he starts drooling and whimpering. baekhyun’s wet mouth is out there betraying him, huh.

same with your body. your reactions give you away, body language just won’t lie. you have a damn hard time staying still. you wanna do something, you wanna touch and guide baekhyun all over.

and vice versa baekhyun keeps on glitching and doing the same thing he really became a living tumblr gif now

this whole session is just so confusing and laced with all these moments of awkwardness it’s really telling you something about yourself and mister pinky toe’s ideal dynamic

baekhyun can’t even get himself to even lightly slap you properly. and when he does, his delicate hands are just so cute. it’s as if legolas came along, scented in jasmine, elegant and fabulous like it’s a l’oreal commercial

he immediately looks concerned after he manages to do it cleanly and you admit it wasn’t really that exciting a feeling yourself. it felt more like, “um ouch, and?”

needless to say, you’re weirded out if anything, baekhyun smacking and dragging you around as a cold-as-ice dom is just a strange thing to do for both of you 

like even exo’s wolf era fashion was more coherent than this carrot fuckery

and those were some of the most intense turtlenecks ever 

is there really nothing dominant baekhyun can pull off. come on he’s the genius idol 

actually 

there’s something that does work out for once

because no rule without exceptions indeed

because hey, you can learn something anyway, it’s the whole point of you going through a list of things to try as a couple

baekhyun is good at doing the more hardcore, faster kind of fingering. who would have thought, totally surprising, revolutionary i know. but that’s where you’re both agreeing hey, there’s some untapped potential you can use for the steamier evenings you have going. 

cuz wow, he can get you off with flying colors. 

...only to succumb to a malfunctioning bobohu wrist 

even baekhyun’s boner for your legs in latex isn’t that stiff

it’s another pause until his hand loosens up again

this poor man just can’t win

and if you’re asking oi hard domming isn’t the only thing you can do

baekhyun trying to summon his inner soft dom: surprise, same old tale. here we go again.

your boyfriend thinks he generally looks way too puppy-like to be your big ole buff daddy taking care of you. oversized sweater, fluffy hair and all. 

you say to him well, it’s not that doms can’t wear casual things. but it’s true that you have to feel your role and find yourself believable. regardless of your looks, in fact. 

unless your partner really enjoys you dressing up as some kind of dominant hyper-archetype? looking the part is relatively unimportant if you’re absolutely made for dominance you say

pretty eye-opening moment for him

in your roleplay, he caresses and kisses you to the point, he can approach and lead you to do this or that position, don’t be mistaken. and he’s good at making presents, he’s indulging you perfectly well and actually likes doing it. but... it still ends up being more vanilla than not a few hours in. the d/s is out the door almost automatically the longer you do it.

at the end, it leaves you with a feeling of “but err, what now? give the maid outfit to charity?” 

baekhyun rubs his neck in search for something else to do, both of you staring at each other with expressions blanker than kyungsoo when a prancing chanyeol is acting up.

how did the quote go again. if you scramble for inspiration, let it be?

it’s exactly that situation when baekhyun soft doms. he can hold you tight and do his thing for a while, but the chemistry of your roles is dwindling into a question mark.

in fact. there’s an uneasy silence as if great mother suho was sitting right beside you critiquing baekhyun’s sugar daddy skills

baekhyun is rich like a motherfucker and can’t even call you ‘my innocent lil’ baby girl’ without looking like he just learned a first grade tonguetwister by heart

you did play your parts with less cracking up, but you clearly tell him that there’s still something strangely clueless and “ah, awkward” (baekhyun’s verdict in response, verbatim) in between the two of you. 

when you take care of baekhyun and tuck him in, you hardly run out of ideas. it just goes on and on. even when you played through an entire scene, you both come up with things to extend the scenario because it’s so much fun. you make him a hot chocolate, massage his feet, brush his hair, do some extra light bondage with a silk ribbon around his ankles to make him feel pretty, feed him pizza, have him cuddle up in your lap, pinch his ass, and do some rimming if he’s feeling a bit hornier. 

the spoiling is nice at the start, but there’s something missing. you want to lead his hands and really treat him, and do it all the time, and baekhyun really finds himself craving it as well. 

baekhyun soft domming quickly turns into — well just normal loving makeouts and gestures. you kiss and touch, there’s nothing hierarchical about it, nothing mega juicy or exciting.

you just don’t get into the groove, you know. there’s nothing particular happening if you try to get into those roles. it doesn’t titillate both of you for an extended period of time, it doesn’t make you curious for more. it’s like... shrug. what about it. 

when you usually dominate, you know something hits home when you think about it all day. baekhyun screaming and crying with his legs twitching pops up whenever you close your freaking eyes goddamn.

you make a note to observe whether you’re going about your daily business thinking about how you could be his innocent good girl. following his every whim, making big eyes at him or something. 

result: more shaky, ruined baekhyun moaning his soul out in the highest of notes and leaking cum everywhere from getting choked and his face sat on. 

daddy baekhyun has simply not crossed your mind. in fact, poor guy no chance to fit in there from the get-go. his particularly whorish, extra subby counterpart is all over your brain cells with his tongue out. and you’re very tempted to grab it between your thumb and index and spit in his mouth for some very good measure. maybe cum in it as well.

um. so there’s that. the more you know.

baekhyun figures as much himself and you try the other side of the equation. oh, oh. here comes hard dom baekhyun.

who gets you on your knees and starts a wild deepthroat session while calling you names. that’s all well and good... nope. your gag reflex decides to yeet some weird coughing facial expressions and reflex cock bites at poor baekhyun who doesn’t know what’s happening. to finish him off completely, you sneeze while having a hiccup and his dick slips out. 

... you both safeword at the same time.

that cleanup has scarred you both for life. what the everloving fuck. no more impulse throatfucking in this pure christian household, then. 

you’ll stick to lazy, twirling, indulgent blowjobs and the usual ruined orgasms for him — the actually planned ones, jesus christ.

like seriously. you invented a whole new language with those confused gargling noises and that wasn’t french, it was advanced level klingon. baekhyun repeats asking if you’re okay and you’re still stuck realizing oh hell, that was not pretty. off the bucket list, you like sucking him off but this style just doesn’t come natural to you. 

the popsicles you could train yourself with are usually gone from the freezer within a day after getting the groceries. baekhyun is wholeheartedly addicted to them. 

he loves cheating on his diet since you told him his fully cheeks are your emotional support squish and kiss pillows, so.

baekhyun rightfully insists he’s better at eating pussy the wild way in the first place — and that you have no business choking on his dick like you’re on hot ones eating the world’s spiciest whatever is trending now.

or actually... baekhyun’s dick can’t be compared to a chili pepper if we’re doing a choking analogy alright. that just doesn’t fit his promotion concept. cinnamon stick is more like it.

ever saw one of these terrible cinnamon spoon videos where reckless people try to defeat god by— anyway, you’ve seen them. that’s how you looked like trying to get your mouth fucked. i think god would actually be defeated by how far away from divine elegance that was and you’re so sorry for subjecting baekhyun to this artless display. 

cinnamon is still best used in small doses. say, for garnishing a creamy cake or pie y’know. 

anyway. you dished up the most butchered attempt at sexy gagging in history and so, baekhyun will preach for days how he’s the one chosen by fate to push down seven big fat inches of your strap still half asleep without even blinking. 

... and that his world-class operatic breath control would probably enable him to bury his face in your pussy on mount everest. baekhyun knows that every domme would sell her soul to get a sub as skilled with breathing as him.

...and that he has the official copyright for giving quality slobbery oral with quality smudged tears. as he will demonstrate to you almost daily from then on. king of messy head and going stupid with the tongue acrobatics. ugh, the noises are amazing, too. give him a grammy for his oral sounds.

gotta leave the heavy-duty work to the experts innit.

at dinner, he also poutingly brags how he can make his spit run out of his nose while he’s sucking himself through your entire dildo collection. and blow spit bubbles. and snort his own semen off his thighs and let it drop off his tongue if he’s in a particularly slutty mood. or a creampie. jeez, baekhyun, the wolf of wallstreet is strong in him. you literally have to stop him from showing off because “hey boy, i already know! i’ve seen it last week bro it was good!”

needless to say he’s talking in essays all day because he wants things go back to normal and he doesn’t have to ask twice.

for real, your candy man with the cinnamon stick has been suffering from the love bites and has to retire his cock for two days from the bruising. 

mind you. the pain he can deal with. that ain’t the problem. by all means, man. he’s a fucking masochist. 

it’s actually more like... submissive you has deactivated his boner and he can’t help it. it’s not you that makes him limp, it’s more like, the klingon choking and the ton of mishaps that just don’t sit right. 

baekhyun feels bad about not doing well enough to make both of you have a good time as well which is lowkey heartbreaking. you have to cheer him up with ‘now repeat after me: stupid, slutty bitch’ jokes to make him chuckle at least a bit.

cuz you gotta understand, baekhyun is very ambitious to develop his talents in all areas of life. if there’s a skill he gets stuck with and he can’t work with his potential, that’s so unusual to him.

and you say man, imagine if you were some kind of uber-talented dom. that’d still not make me sneeze any less.

if you dominate him, it feels easy to do. nothing can really ruin the mood, not even when the lube runs out (baekhyun drools enough to make anything slippery okay). 

except maybe when xiumin rings on landline because he left his favorite fluffy sweater in the subway and needs to vent about it. my god that’s such a tear-jerking story i’m close to sobbing. this shit could kill literally any boner.

or when your hand cramps up after shoving your fingers down his throat and in his ass for like half an hour which should be ranked first as the saddest anime betrayal of all time but it’s justifiable and you had a lot of fun beforehand.

in other words. only the things outside of your control tend to mess with your femdom business. in and of itself, nothing can kill your vibe except a dying battery obviously. 

whereas you trying submission oddly spoils the atmosphere from the inside out and provides a free cringe compilation. like without even doing much, it happens automatically. 

baekhyun relishes in dramatically recounting how you both looked like true clowns attempting a rendition of overexpensive, extra tangly contemporary art bondage. hell, not even employed clowns, completely retired ones, struggling to regain their tightrope tricks from summer 1912 when harry houdini was still hot shit in town. 

you say oh god, that wasn’t even worth a retired clown’s skillset, clowns work damn hard man. you’d be hardpressed to find any circus artist capable of cracking a whip onto themselves baekhyun-style and moaning out loud because it was this good. seriously. that was one for the books.

if baekhyun tried to set foot in some willy-nilly maledom porn, he’d be capable of firing himself on the first day. 

at the end, you just have a good laugh, man. you agree — hey, this ain’t it, but it’s good to know at least. tried and tested, been there, done that. self-whipping and carrot-nibbling and blowjob hiccups.

if you’re both so hopeless and living up to the challenge managed to upset poor mariah carey instead of giving you a hot and steamy time, you very well know where you belong. that’s a good feeling. assuring and a confidence boost for your skills. it makes up for all the clumsiness actually. 

exactly because the try-out part was an entire disaster, domming baekhyun will be even more fun, you can’t see it becoming anywhere near boring. it never really was, but now you know where your strong suits are even more so. and — what to avoid, anyway. 

no more unsafe practice and teddy whipping under this roof my friend

and something to incorporate more often which is baekhyun unleashing his very creative, pianoesque fingering skills on you.

you have lots of anecdotes to rile each other up as well. or, at least, tease another a bit. your high note was too legendary not to be remembered.

baekhyun will use all of these things against you in a positive way if you get what i mean. he’ll say how you being so strangely vocal made him realize just how commanding and compelling your sexy time voice is when you tell him how to kneel, how to kiss, how to revere.

and you teasing him how clumsy a dom he is makes baekhyun more self-assured in his subbing abilities. he knows for a fact you’ve not once roasted him about how well he can use his pretty mouth. cuz it’s the real deal. sloppy, skilled, and eager to please. he’s damn right about that.

hitting his toes has ruined baekhyun’s whole career as a dom and he was mad at first but he did realize that beside the clumsiness, subbing just suits him well as a principle

your experience gives you even more anticipation for all the sex you will have in the future. 

you already knew what you both liked. you know it even more now, it’s underlined, it’s a big relieved yes. no more cringey “daddy, daddy, choke me please!” worship. time to make his day and sit on baekhyun’s perfect face to fuck the shit out of it. 

or you know, actually land a whip on his juicy boyfriend thighs and listen to those heavenly loud reactions in a dead-on pitch (he usually moans in C minor).

long story short and cinnamon sticks aside. it’s even more fun now. you just love your cute subby boy just as he is. he doesn’t have to try to be anything else or step up his game. he’s so ideal just doing what he does like a real angel.

more subby stuff: m.list + ao3

↳⎡FINAL NOTE⎦i love writing crack lmao i hope you were rolling on the floor like i did 😂 write me your favorite part in the comments so we can laugh again and buy me a ko-fi if you wanna 👍

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