#but at the same time i feel so caught in the cycle
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keepswingin · 6 hours ago
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I need more Zed hurt/comfort 👀
He's driving until he's not, his body locking up in pain at the same time his z-band shorts out, flashing different colors and codes.
He thinks he makes some sort of noise, but his teeth are clicking together before he can make another, and his hands clench so hard onto the wheel that later he will wonder if he had broken any fingers. 
Everything fizzles out at once - the next thought in his brain, the ability to control his legs and press his foot to the brake pedal, the control he once sought so hard to get. He's not a stranger to the feeling that hits him whenever he loses control, the spilt urge of submitting to the monster within or fighting against it, but it always takes him time to figure out which way he wants to go, and he barely has time to think before his band is trilling a tone as it goes back online, giving his body a powerful shock. 
Those hit him harder too, after he's been offline, a cruel reminder of what the rest of Seabrook needed him to be. He's still reeling from the panic of everything when the wheel goes, and then the car with it. 
x
The second pulse catches him when he's in the middle of talking to Addison; he's crying out instead of finishing his next sentence, falling to his knees before he can catch himself.
It's not the first time he's felt like this, weak and monstrous against a world out to get him, but it is the first time it takes him more than a moment to recover, his chest heaving, his body trembling long after everything returns to normal.
He feels sweat beading at his brow, a red hot warmth at his wrist that wasn't there before, bleeding into the rest of his skin. There's an aching sting still arching up his neck, even as his z-band recovers, cycling through the motions before giving him a jolt he knows he doesn't need. 
Addison reaches for his shoulder with gentle fingers. When he lifts his head, her eyes are filled with that same worry she never grows tired of giving. "Are you okay?" 
He feels his lips pull and gives her a quick nod before she can scare herself into thinking otherwise, though exhaustion tugs at him, reminding him that he might have super strength, but he doesn't have super endurance. A few moments later, Addison helps him to climb back to his feet. 
Zed pretends he can do it on his own. 
x
Daywalkers and vampires are finally untied on one front, working together and he's watching like some sort of proud parent. Zoey would laugh at him if she were here. Bonzo would jab at his shoulder with a grin - 
He feels like he's on fire, the way in which the next pulse rattles through him, his next breath caught in his throat, every sound around him muffling in his ears. He thinks he hears something click into place, but something else is scrambling his brain so much he can barely think straight. He's on the ground before he can register it, a pitiful growl slipping from his lips. 
He's nothing more than some sort of wounded animal like this, rendered useless by the way his z-band tries to combat the pulse with its own, leaving Zed caught in the middle. His wrist feels beaten, broken, bloody. He doesn't know which is worse. 
Stubbornly, he tries to stand again, muttering words that he hopes are the right ones, before he truly tumbles, unable to catch his footing.
Vaguely, he recognizes both groups coming to aid. He thinks that's something to be happy about, but then another wave of pain ricochets through him, and Zed knows nothing else.
x
He's lost to the pain this time, unable to find his way back. 
Zed thinks there's hands grabbing at him, trying to pull him back, but everything is blurry and his ears are ringing and distantly he can hear Addison calling out to him and all he wants to do is come back but he can't.
Everything hurts, everything aches, his wrist is burning, his legs are shaking, his breath is stuttering, his stomach twisting. Does he even exist, when this is all he can feel? 
He thinks he sees leaves and bare branches, after one slow blink, and then Addison's curling hair in the next, hovering over him, reaching for him even when he can't reach back. 
He wants to hold onto her and never let go. He wants to rip the z-band from his arm and let his skin breathe. He wants a lot of things, but the only thing that happens is voices and hands and darkness. 
x
Every time Zed pulls off his z-band, there is a small part of him that reminds him that this time could be it. There's no telling when the band will simply stop working, or the zombie inside of him will take over without a second thought, and every time Zed thinks of everyone he loves and apologizes to them in his head as though they'll be able to hear him and understand that there are things he needs to do, and this is one of them. 
He will not let the daywalkers and vampires kill each other, not when he's seen Nova's open heart and Victor's longing eyes, not when he's seen the way they gravitate to another, not when he's seen that they're the someday him and Addison used to sing about. 
He's been through this before, and he can go through it again, and again, even as he is left weak and gasping on the ground, back slumped against a piece of rumble. He can do it as long as his body will let him - 
And then something inside of him tells him that this is it, and Zed has never had more regrets. 
He looks over at Addison, at the girl who is his whole entire world, and wonders why he took every second for granted when a minute tomorrow was never guaranteed.
He's not ready to leave her, to look at her one last time and never look at her again. He's not ready to leave her and his sister and his father and his best friend and these kids who have never had anyone proper to look up to, caught in the middle of a war that's lasted decades for no reason. 
Zed isn't ready, but he hurts. He hurts so much. 
Zed isn't ready, but he doesn't make the rules.
x
The kids save the day and the rain heals him. The rain heals Zed and the orchard, and the vampires are no longer starving and the daywalkers are no longer a threat.
Zed and Addison stand in the rain until their clothes are soaked through, and the kids are herded away back into their cabins. Eliza and Willa are chatting away about home when they enter, and Addison leads him to the attached bathroom before he can object. 
She sits him down on the toilet and turns to the medicine cabinet, rifling around for whatever it is she's looking for, as Zed shivers and then pulls his shirt over his head, leaving it to land in a soggy heap on the floor.
He glances down at his wrist and nearly recoils at the way the skin there is so different, inflamed and far from the same pale color as the rest of him. He doesn't realize Addison has turned back towards him wielding some antibiotic cream until she's gently taking his hand into hers. 
He smiles at the soft flush of her cheeks. "Aren't you tired?" 
"I'd rather take care of you," she dismisses, gingerly smearing the cream around his z-band, murmuring apologies when he winces and hisses, unable to help it. 
A comfortable silence grows around them as Addison takes her time with him, attempting to try and heal every bit of damaged skin she can see. Zed's not actually sure how much it will actually help in the long run, but he appreciates the relief the medicine brings him, cooling on his burning skin.
When she deems her work good enough, she turns and swaps the medicine for some soft gauze, which she wraps around his wrist, careful not to bother his z-band. 
"There," she whispers as she smooths the gauze over one final time. "All done." 
Before she can look up at him, he's sliding an arm around her waist and pulling her closer, lips pressing against the skin of her neck before he rests his head against her chest, exhaling. Addison smiles softly and drags her fingers through his damp hair for a moment before resting them at the nape of his neck. Zed pulls back so that he can look up at her. 
"I love you," he whispers, smiling. "Ain't no doubt about it." 
Addison laughs. The sound is as beautiful as her. "You're a dork." 
"Your dork," he throws back, and before he can say anything else, she's closing the distance between them, and it's just like the first time all over again. 
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ejsuperstar · 1 year ago
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I've only been playing this game for a year, but im just... So tired. I love this game, it's one of my favourites. I even candle run nearly every day. But its all just... So much.
Between events, basegame spirits, Travelling spirits, the season, travelling spirits, WHOOPS ANOTHER DAYS EVENT, dont even dare think about basegame spirits, heart trades, friend emotes travelling spirit days event the season the
I feel like im drowning in obligations. I love this game... So much. But even at the level im playing it its just so much
I cant even complain because i get told to go to the feedback channel but i'm 99% sure it goes directly into a metaphorical paper shredder.
Greetings Adventurers 👋
Samantha here, though some of you may know me as Ktjn one of the designers who focuses on Sky's economy!
I want to talk about some bugs we discovered that took place during the first few weeks of Season of Nesting, and the steps we're taking to address them.
Four items from the stone furniture set were introduced incorrectly:
đŸ”čSingle stone bed from week 1
đŸ”čTall stone dresser from week 2
đŸ”čPillow decor from week 3
đŸ”čFolded cloth decor from week 4
The purchase menu mistakenly indicated that players could place two beds and one dresser—but the edit mode correctly reflected the ability to place two dressers and one bed.
We then found that the pillow and folded cloth prices were incorrect. They were priced in Hearts when they should have been priced in Candles. This is fixed now, but players who unlocked those items at the incorrect price will receive a complete currency refund due to this error.
We also considered those who might have been discouraged by the incorrect Heart prices the first time these appeared. For folks who wanted to consider adding these items to their furniture lineup, we’ll have the pillow and folded cloth return with the regularly scheduled Nesting Shop rotation for two weeks: July 8th through 21st PDT.
I'd also like to personally apologize for the amount of time it has taken to find these bugs and bring them to your attention. We wanted to thoroughly and thoughtfully discuss our options that would make right for our mistake, but responsibility for the delay rests on me. đŸ™‡â€â™‚ïž
Season of Nesting introduced the largest collection of items since Sky's launch nearly five years ago, and it's been exciting to see all the creative ways you've used the stone furniture set in your Nests and Shared Spaces. I also want to thank everyone who has taken the time to send bug reports during the Season. Many bugs (like the ones with these four items) we discover ourselves, but the bug reports you send help us capture issues that only appear at large scale—they're instrumental to shaping Sky. 🐛
As always, words cannot fully express my gratitude for the trust and patience you have given us. Thank you! đŸ«¶
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xenosagaepisodeone · 2 months ago
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I've seen what happens when people Get Worse. I've orbited a lot of people who Got Worse (especially online). If you listen to people who Got Worse it's all the same: they don't have consistent, meaningful social support, they've been hurt too many times and they can't open up out of fear that the next betrayal is going to drive the knife right through the artery, they end up spending too much time alone and develop secret languages, meanings, thought cycles completely inscrutable to anyone who has never had to rely on such rituals to survive, they get caught in a cycle of reopening and licking their wounds because the progression of time is so unrewarding and stagnant that the past is basically always the present, and the present is already the future, they become mean, they become strange.
some people might offer to help them but it's rare they ever know where to start, let alone exhibit compassion without grimace. admittedly, even for genuinely compassionate people, it isn't the easiest thing. if the person is someone who is stuck in their ways or doesn't know you, they don't really have a reason to be receptive to your help. "why should I waste my time on someone who is just going to become another memory of heartache? someone who will carelessly hurt and abandon me?" and such. an earnest attempt to help can feel like an attempted assault to them. at the same time, the meaningful interpersonal relationships that these people need will not survive if built on pity or fleeting self-gratifying feelings of "building" someone into your idea of a desirable person.
I don't know where I was going with this, but I always found it hard not to see myself as only a few degrees removed from these people. one or two safety nets separated from being completely trapped. unable to feel safe in not just the world but also my own body. a cosmological dead end. I stay away from habitually engaging in the obvious things can that make trying to change when you're at this point difficult (alcohol, drugs, etc), but if temperance is how you maintain stability in the face of rock bottom, you're basically already there, right? you're there and your body just hasn't caught up. maybe I'm just being dramatic because it's late. hows everypony finding the new deltarune chapters.
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bodhiscurls · 18 days ago
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where do we go now? ( clark kent )
cause now i'm half of myself here without you. you're the best in my life and i lost you. it was one-sided hate how i hurt you. (by gracie abrams!) you don't know where he disappears to- there's always excuses: he's caught up at work, stuck in traffic, some stupid alien attack cut him up on his commute. but now more than ever when you need him to show up at a family dinner where you planned to introduce him to your parents, he still comes in pieces and enough is enough.
pairing: clark kent x fem reader (no use of yn)
themes: angst, break up, no happy ending
masterlist.
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he's not coming.
you smile sheepishly at your mother who sends you a small smile and she begins to start serving the mains. you've made it past appertisers, skipped out on the drinks and small talk, catching them up on work and laughing over memories- now you're entering dangerous uncertain territory and all you could do is sit and stare at the clock as the minutes passed by.
fourty three minutes have passed by.
your father tried not to shoot you a disapproving glance- it had taken so much work to warm him up to clark. don't trust those journalists, he said with that gruff tone in the same way he had told you to keep playing a sport even after graduating university or when he had changed the tires on your car- you don't blame him for worrying. you've never brought a guy home before so the bar was low.
lower than fourty three minutes late.
"i'm sure, he just got caught up late with work," you try though the words feel stale and your mother reaches out to place a hand on yours in comfort. its eight pm, you think. should the offices be closed by now? you have no idea.
"you are more than welcome to take some back for him," and your heart soars at the kind offer. though a thank you might cement the fact that he's stood you up on your own family dinner.
"he's coming, i'm sure. in fact, i'll just ring and see where he is," you stand shakily, embarrassment creeping up on your neck as you make your way to the stairs. and just as you suspect, he does not answer like he hadn't the past four times. a sigh escapes you and you know that after tonight, you won't have to keep feeling this way.
you and clark have been dating for six months- he occupies the apartment opposite yours and that's how you met. through laundry days and dinner dates, the two of you had started something slow and sweet at the beginning. it was like having sleepovers every single night and when you'd fall asleep in his big strong arms, nothing in the world seemed to matter anymore. you probably spend more time in his than you do your own.
then the lies started to creep in; it started as an offhanded excuse for traffic, then he started "forgetting" date nights- being caught up at work. you knew nothing about the journalism world so gave him the grace he needed and it was so easy to fall back into routine, the small comfortable world you built when you weren't pushing an arguement. and the thing with clark was- he never played nasty, never said things he didn't mean in the heat of the moment. he was thoughtful, patient, let you get it all out then apologises- promising you're the centre of his attention, a sad cycle you've trapped yourself in.
the phone is warm in your hand, like a subtle burn to let you know its still there and you close your eyes. this dinner was important to you- its not often you visit your parents and tell them about the supposed love of your life to which they actually return interest. tonight they were supposed to be getting to know him, to love him the same way you had. if only he could show up.
the door knocks with heavy taps you'd know in any lifetime and you open it wearily.
"hey," comes his breathless greeting, a grin laced on his features, stretching his cheeks as he takes a step forward. he lands a kiss on your cheek sloppily and you don't find yourself leaning into it anymore. it comes and it goes as quickly as it did.
"hey," he loops a finger under your chin to bring your gaze to his. "i am so sorry, this alien attack thing redirected my route like four times- i tried to get here as soon as possible," the words come out in a hurried breath and you furrow your brows, wondering if he's rehearsed this on the way here.
"doesn't matter, thank you for coming," you speak though theres no bite or tone in your voice, just weariness and fatigue of someone who's been let down too many times.
"wait, honey," and you don't grace him an actual reply, just a faint "not here," before tugging his hand in yours as you make your way to the dining room. you've hardly interlocked his fingers in yours, emptily holding his palm and letting go of it as soo as you meet your parents again.
your parents are mid laughter when they stop and spot clark, instantly rising to their feets to greet him. clark's bigger than most humans, instantly filling up the room with his body and his heart and he charms the pants off your parents.
he talks politics with your father, plays into your mothers gossip, tells jokes like all the times he's ran away it's to play stand up comedian and you hate how it just feels so perfect. "wow" your mother mouths across the room, sending you and exaggerated swoony smile and it does make you laugh softly. as if on reaction, clark's ears perk up at the sound, sending you a gentle smile and wrapping his hand under the table around yours.
you lean into his shoulder after the meal, needing to balance the weight before deciding to help your mother clear the table. the dishes you carry are swiped clear, clark clearly a fan of your mother's food and when you land them in the sink with a gentle thud, you feel your mother's hands at your shoulders from behind you.
"darling," she murmurs and its ever so gentle that you can feel the tears gloss over your eyes. "i don't mean to judge but he seems incredible and all but," and you knew the but was coming, "what good can come from a man who loves you in pieces," her whisper cracks open your heart and lays it bare bloodied and bruised.
"mom," you whimper softly in her hold and she's instantly shushing you gently, rocking you back and forth in hug that holds you together firmly. it's not something you didn't know, it's just the first time someone has said it aloud to you and it hurts all the same
"i love him," you breathe, "and i know he loves me," you try.
"and sometimes it's not enough," she strokes your back in comfort and you look up to the ceiling, trying to force those tears back down.
"i know," you clear your throat and she lets you stay like that a little longer. when you return to the living room to find clark's heavy eyes on your figure and dinner wrapped up, you don't meet his gaze.
you kiss your mother and father on the cheek as clark shakes their hand firmly, wrapping your mother in a hug. they wave goodbye to you from the doorstep and watch you get into his car as clark shuts the door behind you.
the engine starts with a soft purr before he pulls out and starts the drive home. the quiet of the night entering your car as you both work your way around the elephant in the room.
he tells you about work to which you reply with nods and one liners and clark senses the shift like it's in the air suffocating him. he parks up on the side and you look around in confusion- this isn't the way home. you look over at him and for once in your life you don't actually know what to think about him.
"do you wanna tell me whats on your mind?" he speaks softly. too softly that it blurs the edges of the cuts he's left on you before and you almost faulter.
"nothing," you get out, because you don't actually know where to start.
"its not nothing if it's got you upset like this, baby," and when he sees you flinch at the pet name you used to adore his heart stills, missing a beat thundering in moment.
"it's you," and the beats stop entirely as he's stuck to the seat. you watch his expression, eyes begging him to just anything but he's stunned into a careful silence.
"it's me?" he asks slowly and you nod, the lump in your throat tightening your voice.
"i can't do this anymore, clark," and the first teardrop glistens in the dark as it falls. "there's only so much i can do, i've tried to hard to be patient- i, i, ah," you groan feel the rush of emotions overwhelm you, "i stretch myself to new limite to make room for all your lies and secrets and i'm breaking clark."
you look up from your lap, years wetting your lashes to face him honestly- he needs to know the damage he's done, "you don't even know what you do to me and it's unfair clark, it hurts," you try and wipe away the tears that fall but a new fresh batch that form and drop and before you know it, the mascara streaks a messy river down your face and you can't stop this.
he doesn't say anything for a moment, focusing on the heavy rise and fall of his chest. he should've known that he was breaking you apart, that he hadn't given you the trust that this relationship needs to work but he's harbouring a secret that could put you in so much more danger if you knew.
but still he tries, "honey, we can fix this," comes an honest admission of stern determination and you pull back, recoiling in anger.
"there is no we, clark," you jab a finger at his chest, "we haven't been on the same team for a while, you've left me on a one vs one each time you disappear with some lame excuse and i have to convince myself that you're not lying or hiding that it's all okay- we," you repeat back to him in a scoff, "i've tried to fix this so don't demean me and dog me down with a 'we'." there's no room for clark to carry on before you're ranting again.
"you were late to family dinner," your voice lowers an octave in defeat- letting him know that tonight was the final straw. "you know how important this was to me, you're the first guy i've brought home and you made me look stupid- then you play happy home pretend like it's nothing and you make me feel stupid too- what kind of asshole does that?" you ask him. he gave you a glimpse of what the future could've looked like if he just let you all the way in and you hate him immensely for it.
"i'll cut back on work, we can spend more time together- i can fix this," he pleads but you shake your head softly.
"i'm done, clark. i think it's time we call it," you nod to yourself more than anything.
his reply comes as quick as it is stubborn, laced with firmness and the fear of letting the best thing happen to him go, "i dont want to."
"i need to." comes your desperate whine.
"but i love you-" and you wince because on any other night it's what would've made smile, laugh and melt into his embrace. now it stands outside the cage you're trapped in, molted into the key that's so close within your grip.
"and its not enough," you counteract, "not when its also determined through actions- when it doesnt come whole- when i get bits of you when you decide to show up like youre superman saving the day," you list off your fingers and clark momentarily stumbles at your comparison. you use it ironically and it being the cause of his relationship failing pricks at his heart, he can feel the migraine coming in already- the you sized hole he's unable to fill.
"relationships arent perfect they dont-" he stumbles and its clearly the wrong thing to say when you cackle loudly in irony.
"oh god i know! ours is far from perfect!" your voice grows a little quieter and settles an air of finality, "love isnt always easy clark, but it shouldnt have to be so fucking hard."
"im calling it now, before we lose more time to this and we wake up so miserable one day suddenly i don't know ten years down the line tethering ourselves to a feeling we thought was enough and i hate both you and me for staying. i'm not happy clark and i cant live like that- i refuse to live like that," you beg and he sighs in defeat.
"im sorry," he murmurs, unsure of what he could say. nothing can change your mind. he's fucked this up and there's no way out of this for him.
"thats nice to hear," you accept, unwilling to forgive him just right now when the feelings are still raw, fresh and tug at the seams of your mind. your fingers find your temples to massage the growing aches and you face the window- looking anywhere other than your doomed lover, "please take me home."
no words are spoken for the remainder of the journey back to your apartment complex. the faint murmurs of billy joel's "piano man" hum alongside the engine and for once it feels like the universe is on your side- there's no traffic for miles, green lights ahead and you get home within minutes. clark however, still gets out the car at lightning speed before you, almost knocking you over to open your door and walks a few steps behind your pace to make sure you get up to the level of your apartments okay.
the final nail in his coffin is when you turn the key to your own apartment door instead of his like you would usually do almost every night and shut it without so much as a look behind. he stands there, pressing his forehead to the cool wooden panel of your door and breathes in heavily.
"fuck," he sighs, the feelings of tonight weighing his body down that he stays there for a couple of minutes before heaving himself up and heading into his own. he however does take one look back behind him only to find nothing changed- the door still shut on him and the sounds of light switches clicking off.
he doesn't blame you one ounce for ending things- you're stronger than he is by miles but that doesn't mean he isn't going to miss you any less.
riya saying hi: REDEEMING MYSELF AFTER THE LAST ONE GUYS ‌ this one goes out to @velovicy here's a real break up / unhappy ending - no grovelling however because i do fear this one may be unfixable but i love me a bad ending sometimes and hope you liked it too - let me know what you all think! 💘 i love hearing what you guys have to say x
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femmeftal · 4 months ago
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✩ÌČ broken doll
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pairings ★âș : viltrumite mark x reader
warnings ★âș : creampies, drugging, sex scene is rush cause i want to eat my SALAD. slight choking.
Viltrumite!Mark who asks for your hand, knowingly already having the answer even if your shook your head, said no or anything else he would still fly you away to viltrum keeping you safe and sound there like a doll.
Viltrumite!Mark that can never stand to see his precious darling starve themselves so that mark can leave them alone, that being their worst idea of escaping because now mark is around them 24/7 making sure they eat, drink, wash up and be taken care of
Viltrumite!Mark who after leaving for missions and heading back home he takes small trinkets from the word they invaded, always ranting on how it reminds you of him.
Viltrumite!Mark that can see the survival in your eyes, assuring you he wouldn’t dare lay a hand on his porcelain doll forcing you into an unwanted embrace which has you shuffling to escape, obviously failing from the superhuman strength that he is equipped with. Your doe eyes watering up from being held so long, and obviously getting defeated from the purpose of escaping.
Viltrumite!Mark who has a stern grip on you when you guys sleep in the same bed, his arms wrapped around your waist, head buried into your hair so every time he breaths in mark could only smell you.
Viltrumite!Mark that is the same man who acquires you both to strip before bed, being nakedly pressed together. his excuse is that he needs you both to have your natural heats together, so when you refuse his eyes turn colder than they usually are.
Viltrumite!Mark that caresses your face after you’ve been caught escaping, not wanting to he has to punish his darling.. how will their little head learn from whats wrong and whats right, obviously he has to baby trap you! what else is there to do ?! :((
Viltrumite!Mark who is waiting for your cycle which he had called “ heat “ to be around the corner, knowing how it worked he knew how bad your ovulations were. already having a plan to have you bounce onto him.
Viltrumite!Mark who’s plan is successful, his eyes filled with lust when the aphrodisiacs starts kicking in pretty face for you, of course the drugs on viltrum are way stronger than on earth. you looked so desperate too begging him to fuck you.
Viltrumite!Mark that is getting so hard from the sight of your reddened face, watery big eyes staring up at him while being placed onto your knees. the rough ground grinding into them, god you were so vulnerable.
Viltrumite!Mark whose bulge you push your face on, the fat of your cheeks being pushed up showing the outline of his pulsing hard thick cock that was hidden underneath the cloth that was occasionally worn .
Viltrumite!Mark who’s hands are all over your curves, the same hands that was used to kill people were the same hands that were fondling the fat of your ass cheeks.
the same man who had probably ripped through his enemies flesh with his teeth was battling you through out the kissing session teeth clacking against each other, tongues even struggling to the point where the kiss started to turn into an open mouth kiss.
Viltrumite!Mark that is gripping onto your jaw to make your loud moans shut up, you were practically screaming when the two of his thick fingers inserted into your hole prepping you for the inches you NEEDED to prepare for, body pressing deep into the bed
Viltrumite!Mark who starts to kiss you while you’re about to cum, body twitching in satisfaction, moans getting louder from every curl of his fingers hitting the exact spot every single fucking time.
Viltrumite!Mark that rips the clothes off your body, making your nipples and newly fingered hole feel the cold breeze hit your body, shivering you’d arch your back putting your legs up into the air “ pwease..m’ it hurts “ that did it for him, fuck he could smell your arousal that was pooling up.
Viltrumite!Mark that is now naked was in front if you, stroking his cock.. he was at least 8 inches long and pretty thick. the whimpering would tell him everything he needed to know, god you were absolutely desperate holding legs so he could insert his fat cock into you.
Viltrumite!Mark who is finally towering over your heated body, tip hovering at your pulsing hole. “mgh.. put it inn “ obeying your command his hand rested at your neck making it the most beautiful necklace he has given you in a while, the push of his hips
were lethal. feeling how just the tip made your head spiral, mark stared at your trying to make sure he could start pushing himself deeper
“ mark mm.. “ your teeth caught onto the bottom of your lips showing how much pleasure you took into this, the rough grabbing of your hands digging their nails into his hips confirmed how much you needed his cock to insert you deeper
“ OH fwuckmgh- “ your hands were shaking, you couldn’t hold onto your legs anymore like this from how deep he just slammed down into you, lewd wet sounds bounced off the white room you and mark were fucking in. caging your head into his neck he could feel his tip hit your spongey walls a spot that made your loud groans turn into louder squeals, knowing how to pleasure a little vixen like you “ tell me you’ll never leave me again and i’ll continue vixen. “ chest heaving up and down mark rested waiting for you to admit defeat which you did “ i won leave! promise i wont just fuck me “ tearing up because of the soreness of not being taken care of was exhausting, sniffling and trying to caress his face so he could at least budge or thrusting, and you were right his fingers clamped onto your nipples. you felt your juices on those same fingers that he fingered you with, twisting them or putting them into his hungry mouth. your little cock drunk brain couldn’t focus on both of his actions crying out when you could feel mark starting to pull his hips back and slam them right back in, throwing your head back into the small pillows that accommodated you for stuff like this. “mark! yesh just right there ouhh “ he was hitting that spot over and over, squinted eyes staring down at you while you “ you’re such a fucking sight.. im gonna give you my heir so i make sure you wont leave “ he mumbled under his breath, groans and whimpers covering up his malicious sentence. pressing your legs up higher to access deeper, obviously getting somewhere when he felt nails scraping and digging into his abs and holy shit he was doing a huge number on you. “ wan cum please make me cum mark! “ groaning even louder he closed his eyes tight, the grip on your legs slightly tightening. you’d watch him correct his posture soon being surprised from the ruthless thrusting of his hips, the wet smacking sounds each time your guys hips met had drowned you. the band in your stomach trying to not snap but it was so impossible to do when his tip was ruthlessly hitting your g spot carelessly. “ m cumming! fuck markk “ and cumming you were, your cum started to form around his cock making a white ring that was painted around his cock “ shh..fuck “ he couldn’t contain himself either it looks like or sound likes, hips stuttering and abs tensing up” be ready im gonna- fuck hell yea “ he came, it was too much for your loaded hole to take, cum even dribbling out your worn out and used hole.
all work owned by @femmeftal , requests open
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vintagebishx · 1 year ago
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FOR THE FIRST TIME theodore nott
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PAIRINGS: theodore nott x hufflepuff!reader
WARNINGS: fluff fluff fluff, use of she/her pronouns!, i used all lower caps.
SUMMARY: in which, the usual womaniser finds himself in love with a girl who doesn’t even know his name

“ITS JUST LIKE SEEING HER,
FOR THE FIRST TIME,
AGAIN
”
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“The first time you caught my eye
it was not love at first sight.
Instead a quiet curiosity was
planted in my chest and i knew
it was only a matter of time before
you sunk beneath my bones and
nurtured this deep seated familiarity
into a love so fierce that
i would question if i had
ever been in love before”.
THOSE WERE THE words that theo scribbled down in his journal as he sat in the middle of the courtyard amongst other students on the hot and surprisingly toasty day in Hogwarts. he finally dropped the pencil in his hand as his eyes averted back over to the sight before him, y/n.
theo wasn’t normally one for poetry but ever since the first time he had ever saw her, it was all he could think about.
he found himself in a never ending cycle of writing, constantly writing his feelings and thought down whenever she crossed his mind which was all the time.
it was like she had unknowingly helped him discover a part of himself that he was unaware of.
his gaze stuck to her face that was glowing due to the sun hitting her perfect caramel skin. she sat peaceful on the green grass with a big book opened in her hands, one that seemed to capture all of her attention.
his eyes then traveled down to her hands, her hands that were decorated with multiple rings and her wrists that wore a few bracelets.
she wore a sleeveless v-neck jumper on top of a long sleeved shirt as her yellow tie was tied perfectly. she wore two necklaces which hung and rested against his the tie.
he watched as the slight breeze in the air blew into her brown, perfectly curly, and volumed hair which also had a sunflower tucked into the side of her hair slightly matching her yellow, Hufflepuff tie. he wanted so badly to talk to her, to get to know her, to be near her, but he instead found himself gawking from afar and silently hoping that she would at least turn and look his way.
but wether he talked to her or not, even him just being able to look at her was enough to fuel his slight obsession with the girl.
she was special.
she was like the coffee he needed to energise him in the morning, or even the warmth he needed on a cold and gloomy day.
she was the sunshine that could light up any dark room.
with every minute he spent staring at her, he grew even more curious by the second. he wanted to know everything about her.
he wanted to know why she always wore that one bracelet, why she always seemed to read books published by the same author, why she always played with her hair while reading or even why she always came to the courtyard alone at the same time everyday and sat at the same spot too.
he was intrigued by her, she was different.
he didn’t want to say it in a corny way, but she wasn’t like all the other girls in Hogwarts. she kept to herself, had friends but never minded being alone, was always sweet to everyone, and didn’t care how others viewed her.
classic Hufflepuff.
if you had asked him a year ago today if he thought a hufflepuff would ever had him feeling this way, he probably would’ve laughed in your face. what made it worse was that he was presented with so many chances to go and talk to the girl but instead, he froze up and got lost in all of the words that he wanted to say which was nothing like him.
it was like she had casted an irreversible spell that only pulled him closer and closer to her.
“are you okay?” a voice suddenly spoke, causing him to break from his deep gaze.
he looked away from the girl and looked up which finally revealed mattheo, “oh- yeah, yeah!” he spoke as he cleared his throat and silently hoped that his slight infatuation with the girl wasn’t too obvious to his best friend.
mattheo furrowed his eyebrows as he looked down at his friend who was sat alone, “really? cause if you ask me, it looks like little miss Hufflepuff has you distracted
” he spoke with a small smirk.
“what? no!” theo quickly denied as he jerked his head back at his friends’ words.
matteheo took a moment to look down at the notebook that was sat on theo’s lap as he took notice to all the words written down that he struggled to read due to how far it was, “and what is this?” he asked as he suddenly knelt down to pick up the notebook, and got back up on his feet.
a sudden feeling of panic took over theo’s body as he hadn’t told anybody about his recent passion for poetry that was fuelled due to y/n.
“the first time you caught my eye it was love at first sight,” mattheo began as he read out of theo’s notebook. theodore was quick to stand up in attempts to grab the notebook from his friends’ hand but failed as mattheo continuously swerved his attempts.
“i knew it was only a matter of time before you sunk beneath my bones?” mattheo continued with a surprised tone at what he was hearing.
he had never heard theodore speak ever so passionately before.
“into a love so fierce-” “give me that!” theo interrupted his words as he finally grabbed the notebook from him.
his cheeks were tinted with a light red pigment as a small feeling of embarrassment grew inside of his system.
“your in love?” mattheo spoke with a laugh, “your in love with a hufflepuff?” he continued.
theo rolled his eyes at his words, “can you stop?” he spoke with an irritated tone.
“she’s more than that
” he began, “she’s special, s-she’s like a breath of fresh air in a world filled with copies of each other.” he spoke, his words filled with love as he brought his gaze back to y/n.
her peaceful presence finally bringing back that safe feeling in the pit of his stomach.
mattheo just stood there with his mouth slightly agape, realisation finally taking over him. his friend wasn’t just in love, he was deeply in love.
“wow
 it’s worse than i thought, your infatuated nott.” mattheo said in a shocked tone.
he took a moment to look at theo, who put his head down in defeat as his friend uncovered his hidden feelings.
there was a reason as to why he had never told his friend about his liking towards the girl and it was simply because, he wasn’t used to it.
he wasn’t used to liking somebody, at all.
he wasn’t used to constantly thinking about somebody every single moment of the day, or having your heart beat faster at not only the sight of them, but the sound of their name. he wasn’t used to only being happy if he saw a certain someone, or not being able to sleep because of somebody disrupting his thoughts. he just wasn’t used to any of it.
he thought that y/n was just another girl that he would’ve liked for at least two days then gotten over her but no, the past three weeks of non-stop thoughts about her made it clear that it was more than just a crush and that he had to talk to her.
at first he was a little mad at the innocent girl as he wanted to know if she had put a spell over him, but he realised it was all him.
he craved her.
“why don’t you go talk to her, i mean you are theodore n-” “no!” theodore quickly interrupted his friend.
just the thought of her even looking at him made his nerves come to play.
mattheo took a moment to analyse his friends’ body language before letting out a loud laugh, “there’s no way,” he began, “are you
 nervous?” he laughed out.
theo rolled his eyes due to it probably being mattheo’s tenth time laughing at him.
“i-i’m not, i just don’t know what i’d say to her.” he explained himself, “since when have you had trouble talking to girls nott? your clearly nervous.” mattheo laughed a little more before stopping.
“you know what?” mattheo spoke which caused theo to listen, “your gonna go over there and just speak whatever comes to mind.” he said.
theodore’s eyes widened at his words, he wasn’t prepared to even be near the girl let alone talk to her.
“what? no i’m not-” his words were interrupted by mattheo who grabbed the boys’ arm and began pulling him towards where the girl was peacefully sat, “yes you are!” mattheo spoke, simply ignoring the boy who was trying to rebel and pull away from his strong hold.
“no i’m not, now fuck off!” theo spoke harshly as he began using his strength to try and pull away but mattheo wasn’t having it.
“yes you are!” mattheo protested as he let go of theo before giving him one final strong push, pushing him right in front of the girl and causing him to drop his notebook onto the floor.
the commotion and sudden figure blocking her from the sun was enough to make y/n finally bring her head up from her book, she looked up to find the brunette boy staring right at her which slightly had her confused.
he looked a little anxious, as if he had been scared.
an awkward smile took over the girls’ face, “um, hello
” she said hesitantly as he did come from nowhere, “can i help you or?
” she continued.
but theo just stood there, like an idiot.
what am i doing, say something. he told himself mentally as he knew how stupid he looked, this was seriously unlike him.
“uhh, i-um,” he muttered out, “no!” he finally spat out as he finally moved out of his frozen state that he was once in before.
and there it was. the usually cool, and laid-back theodore nott was not tripping over his words and struggling on how to even form a sentence.
“oh
” y/n spoke, not really knowing what to tell him as she just continued to look up at him.
her eyes left his as she began to look at the grass, noticing a random, and unfamiliar notebook beside her.
“is this yours?” she asked him before she picking it up, “um yeah.” theo nervously spoke.
just then, y/n’s eyes scanned the page that was open. she quickly realising that it was a poem, her eyes lit up as she looked back at him.
“wait, did you write this?” she asked him as she stared right at him, waiting for a response.
theo’s eyes grew wide at the fact that she looked at the poem that he had made about her, his heart beats sped up due to a little embarrassment.
“y-yeah, but i’m not really a writer so-” “are you kidding me? i love poems!” she exclaimed, interrupted his words.
she took a moment to look a with a wide smile, the smile that made him want to melt.
“why don’t you sit down?” she offered which made him become shocked, “i mean unless you don’t want to then-” “no of course i do!” he suddenly spoke before walking a little closer to her, kneeling down, and sitting right next to her on the grass.
theo turned around and took a moment to look at the girl, this was the closest he had ever been to her and definitely the longest, and the first time, he had ever talked to her.
he took a good and long look at the girl, she was even prettier when closer.
her shoulder lengthened curls captured her face perfectly as they were as healthy as ever, she had a few small brown freckles on her face which is something he had never gotten to notice until now, he also didn’t notice how high her cheekbones were either. her full straight eyebrows were what made her face even more perfect as her almond shaped eyes topped her look off. his eyes then flickered to her her full, succulent lips which were as soft as ever. to top things off, her beautiful skin glowed ever so gently as the sun bounced off her face.
she was perfect
 no, ethereal.
her smell too, she smelled addictive.
her sweet vanilla, tonka bean, red berries and mandarin scent was what drew the boy crazy. it made him want to be near her forever and ever.
“do you mind if i read this?” she asked him nicely before turning around and looking him looking him right into his eyes, “uh, sure.” he spoke as he quickly got out of whatever trance he was in.
it wasn’t like she would know it was about her anyways, he thought to himself.
y/n’s eyes went down the page as she read the poem, his writing style completely had her drawn as if it were written about her.
“oh my gosh, this is so beautifully written.” she complimented as she still looked at the notebook, she couldn’t believe how well he had managed to portray his feelings onto the paper.
she turned to look at him, “i-i mean, you sunk beneath my bones and nurtured this deep seated familiarity into a love so fierce? beautiful.” she recited his words as she continued to stare at him, impressed by how poetic he was.
theo’s eyes widened at her sudden compliments, he felt his cheeks heat up.
“thank you
” he muttered as a small smile came across his face, “who is this about?” she suddenly asked him.
theodore cleared his throat, “um, p-pardon?” he nervously asked even though he had heard her perfectly, he was just caught up by her question and did not know what to say.
a smile took over the girls’ face as she let out a breathy laugh, God that smile

“i said, who is this about? i mean it’s so deep, there has to be someone because this isn’t something you can just make up
” she explained to him, and she was right. there was somebody who had inspired him to make the poem and it was her.
but he couldn’t tell her that.
how was he meant to explain to her that he wrote her a whole love poem, and many more, that a wife’s own husband could probably never make up if he tried.
how could he explain that for the past three weeks, she had been running endlessly through his mind?
how could he explain that every time he saw her, it felt like seeing her for the first time again?
how could he explain that in a world full of chaos, she was the peace in his presence?
he felt himself choke up due to nerves, he really did not know what to say to her. he was confused. he was confused on how this girl had so much power over him without even realising.
“a girl.” he managed to finally spit out, “it’s um, it’s about this girl.” he continued.
his eyes wandered her perfectly crafted face before opening his mouth to speak some more, “there’s this one girl who is beautiful. s-she’s sweet, kind and has been stuck in my mind almost everyday.” he spoke, “but the thing is
 i haven’t talked to her yet”.
y/n furrowed her eyebrows, “well if you haven’t spoken to her before, then how do you know she’s all of those things?” she questioned curiously.
“because for three weeks i’ve been sat there like an idiot gawking at her, watching her interact with others instead of being a man and attempting to talk to her.” he explained, “there’s just something about her, she’s absolutely perfect.” he rambled on.
a smile that spread on her face exposed her pearly whites to him, “sounds like your in love!” she said excitedly.
“why can’t you just try and speak to her?” she asked curiously.
theo chucked as he brought his head down before bringing back up and look at her again, “because she makes me nervous, and i never get nervous around girls.” he said.
“but she’s different
 she’s not like the rest of them, she’s even better.” he said as he was now getting lost in her beautiful brown eyes that seemed to have more colour due to the sun, “s-she’s special.” he muttered as he dropped his eyes to her lips.
it took everything in him to not just take her in his arms and give her the biggest hug ever, but he stopped himself.
y/n examined the boy and his body language, it was really no secret that he was in love. she had seen many of her friends fall in love so she was pretty good at detecting when somebody was undergoing symptoms of the contagious disease of love.
just as she was about to respond to his words, a voice interrupted her words.
“y/n? y/n!” a voice spoke causing them both to turn their heads, revealing a blonde girl in hufflepuff uniform that theo had recognised from one of his classes, her name was scarlett.
“oh hi scar!” y/n exclaimed happily, her eyes lighting up as she saw her dearest friend.
“i’ve been looking for you everywhere, everyone has!” she said excitedly as she got closer to the duo sitting down on the grass.
“we need to go, it’s girls night tonight and we need to start getting ready remember?” scarlett reminded her friend which caused y/n to gasp, “oh my goodness, how could i forget?” y/n questioned herself.
she grabbed her tote bag and shoved her book in there before standing up. scarlett held her hand out, which y/n took happily and began to walk with her.
however, y/n’s movements came to a halt.
theo watched as y/n mumbled a few words to her friend before turning back around and making her way back over to him, causing him to smile a little.
“i’m so sorry, i never got your name.” she spoke, “so incredibly rude of me.” she rambled on which only caused theo to look up at her and smile due to how cute she was.
his was also slightly shaken at the fact that she really didn’t know who he was, he believed that he had made quite the reputation for himself so it shocked him.
he stood up from the ground, his tall frame now meaning that she was the one looking up at him.
“theodore, theodore nott.” he informed her, holding his hand out in hopes that she didn’t deny his request.
his nerves died down as she accepted his request and shook his hand, “i’m happy i met you theo.” she smiled. her smooth hands felt like something he had been missing his whole life.
“wait can i call you that?” she asked frantically, she didn’t want to offend somebody she had just met.
theodore smiled at how cute she was being in that moment, “of course you can
 you can call me whatever you want.” he said, slightly regretting what he last said as he didn’t want to embarrass himself even though it was probably too late.
but y/n just let out a laugh. not one that was degrading, but one that made him realise that she found what he said funny which honestly calmed him down.
y/n finally let his hand go before giving him a heart warming smile and walking off as he just stood their and watch her skip over to her friend with a smile planted on his face.
“you see, now that wasn’t hard was it?” mattheo asked his friend cockily as he came out from his hiding spot behind the tree.
but theo didn’t hear him.
instead, he continued to watch the girl walk further, and further away as his stomach did somersaults.
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poem made by: Lyra Wren
border creds: @animatedglittergraphics-n-more
AUTHOR SPEAKS! i kind of based this off of an unpublished draft so if i post something familiar to this, it’s cause i described the character in the same way as the draft
i hope you guys enjoyed this though!!
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limerlove · 6 months ago
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FIND YOUR WINGS, VALENTINE
❝ VI!ONE SHOT ❞
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pairing. roommate!vi x femcoded!reader x exsituationship!caitlyn
caitlyn kiramman, a woman who yearned to have her cake and eat it too. violet, a simple girl who has fallen for someone emotionally unavailable and you — trying to disperse between heartbreak and a new love.
warnings. eighteen+, nsfw content: 17k wc. bartender!reader, melvika cameos, lesbian sex, semi-public sex, mutual finger-off, anal play, shy!vi, caitlyn is a cunt (in this), unfaithful mentality, valentine's day aura?
rayray rambles, chat! we made it. truthfully, this fic got away from in so many ways and i'm proud of myself for reigning it in. this originally was going to be a new years eve fic but it got so impossibly long that i wanted some more time with it. but i hope you enjoy it, this is my latest baby and a lot of love was put into it. happy valentines ♡
— special thank you to my amazing proofreader reader, @meganegatari, plu, i love you dearly.
â€Șâ€Șand to my love, @sinstear, thank you for always listening to me ramble. happy valentines bubba, ily. even though you've already read 85 percent of this bc i was so excited about it
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You could still feel her.
Like it was just last night with her finger buried deep inside, pinning you against your front door with her slender fingers, the soft pad of her fingers stuffed inside your pants, making you see stars. A last ditch effort to keep you around. 
Caitlyn likes to chase but she becomes a bambi in headlights once she’s caught her prey. There was desperation for the last cry, a final effort to keep you around. You’d never seen such a progressive emotion from her. 
Before tonight, every moment; every word said seems transactional. 
The hauntingly blue windows of her soul look anywhere but you. You wonder if it's a tactic. Refusing to make eye contact when she’s most vulnerable. As if one glance at you would cost her the rest of her life, an outcome she can’t afford. 
These days, she’s afraid of her own shadow. Unable to look anyone in the eyes, her spirit crushed like she’s anywhere but here. When you try to pull her back to shore, she recedes even further. 
Nothing is good enough. 
Caitlyn makes it abundantly clear that you aren’t. Insults bite into your skin like a bullet, the blow never to your heart, the place you desperately want it to be. 
But for now, you lick your wounds and you let her have what she wants. Even if she’s fading from your grip, you can still hold her, you can still pretend she loves you the same way, and you can cry after she leaves. You wonder if she sees you for who you really are or if Caitlyn only sees what benefits her. 
It’s a cycle that keeps you here, entangled with a woman who doesn’t have the decency to let you go. If Caitlyn is half the woman you believe her to be, she would have mercifully kicked you out of her apartment. 
Then, there’s Vi.
Nothing with her is serious, not even physical, she just whines and dines you, she holds you like she loves you. Above everything else; Vi makes you forget. Even if it’s with a soft smile, a harmless joke that’s so stupid it makes you giggle — it’s a moment of peace. One you crave more than desolation. 
There’s a softness to her that Caitlyn doesn’t allow. You’re sure that’s why the two didn’t work out. Caitlyn is rough. Kind when she needs something, vengeful when you get in her way but when she seeks retribution for her sins, it’s entirely too late. 
Vi is everything Caitlyn isn’t, what she’s incapable of being — a simmering token of hope you keep close to your chest. 
The more you think about it, the more your stomach twists in knots over your neediness. Entertaining Violet so she can quench your emotional thirst. And keeping Caitlyn around in good faith, a blind faith you place in her, hoping that you’re not wrong. 
You can’t be wrong. 
Somehow she’ll change, right? 
“Why do you have to leave so soon?” Her accent bites into you like an icy river, devoid of emotion as she reveals what she really wants. A silky blue robe untied as her full breasts sit perfectly on her chest. 
Almost as if it’s muscle memory, your thumbs circle over her pink nipples, it buds under your touch and Caitlyn does what she does best. 
She grasps onto the reins of control, refusing to let go. 
With a firm hand, she applies pressure on the back of your neck, beckoning your mouth to find home on her perfect tits and they do. At the moment, you’re her favorite toy and she lets you play.
Plump lips latching on her nipple while your free hand squeezes the other, your tongue flicking over the sensitive nipple as your teeth graze over the sensitive skin, a gasp falling from Caitlyn’s lips. 
“Pretty girl just needs her mouth put to work. Give the other some attention, she’s feeling quite lonely.” 
Doing as you're told, your desperate drool collects on her chest as you bite the swell of her chest, before sucking on her other nipple as if she’s lactating. Then the idea of Caitlyn’s belly swollen makes you whimper, moaning into her skin as she runs a finger up her own slit, your eyes looking up at her as you suck, flick, and bite. 
As if your life depends on it. Maybe it did. 
“Come back to bed, babygirl. I need my perfect little slut. I can fuck you in the shower just the way you like.” 
The ammunition of her poisonous words might as well have penetrate your bloodstream. Displaced trust turns you into another toy for her to use. Trapped perpetually in a cycle you had a hand in enabling. Words full of steam leave a third-degree burn on your skin, not a single drop of blood to be found. 
But even if you want to pull back, you can’t. 
There’s no further arguments as you slip into the lion’s den. With soul-crushing desire, your bare chest presses against the fogged glass, Caitlyn using her favorite dildo as she fucks you into the wall of glass, a dignity you posses withers with each thrust. Perfectly manicured slim fingers pull at your hair as an arch to your back is forced. 
With each thrust she becomes more aggressive, her pace is punishing and it’s meant for you to fall in her hands. But you’re resisting, holding off the orgasm and the high that comes with it. The higher you fall, the harder you crash. You know Kirakiller won’t be there to catch you. 
You’ll burden the fall on your own. 
“Cait, please—” 
The slap of your stretched lips being thoroughly obliterated by her brutal cock can be heard throughout her apartment. She wants to make you come, that’s clear, but she also wants to break you. There’s nothing more a Kiramman loves, hearing you beg for mercy. To have the pathetic and whiny girl who blindly loves her, shattering at her grip. 
“That’s not my name. You fucking know it’s not. Good little sluts say it, don’t they?” 
Before you can even process it, she slaps your ass, three times, sending the orgasm raging through you. All Caitlyn does is fuck your pretty face into the glass as you take every inch of her. Then her pace halts as your heavy breath is heard over the shower. She turns the water off and you’re stuck there, unable to move.
Afraid. 
 Your heart would collapse right with you. 
Caitlyn moves swiftly, like a knight coming in the dead of knight to steal the princess. On all fours, she rummages through the cabinet before locating the precious wand. With a profound smirk, she grips the handle as if it’s an extension of her limb. 
“Looks like you’re getting punished today, babygirl. How do you wanna take it?”  
The lines blur together over the next few hours until you’re stumbling out of the apartment. Caitlyn not directly kicking you out of her home but your stay is only welcome for as long as the fucking window is open. It’s nearly three hours past midnight, tears in your eyes as you tread home with a gaping hole punctured with her sharpest end of her carefully placed blade. 
You wonder if she’s always been like this. Hot and hungry for power, ready to hurt anyone in order to get it. The angry flesh begs to be fed, and she gives in each time. Even when it means she sees the love depleted from your eyes, or when you refuse to make eye contact, or like tonight when she watches you hold in tears to escape out of her apartment. 
Some nights, you did want to be handled with a gentle hand but it’s not something Caitlyn gives. 
Anything more than a generous hand and greedy lips begging to lap at your cunt and Caitlyn comes up short. Living up to her name to the fullest. 
Kirakiller, they called her. 
There’s a dozen reasons for her name. How she slaughters everyone on the pitch,  academically she’ll make you feel inferior to her own privileged, private education prior to university. How she kills your spirit if you aren’t someone she sees as an exceptional academic student for Piltover University. 
All of it seems to be a game for her. With Cassandra Kiramman as the dean, the board members sit heavily in her overflowing pocket, she runs things as she sees fit. Her daughter being taken care of and on top of the world is her number one priority. There’s been a dozen to come after the Kiramman’s and none have been successful. Murmurs of corruption grace the hallowed halls but not a soul dares to challenge the wealth and power of the prestigious bloodline of the Kirammans.  
Caitlyn “Kirakiller” Kiramman associating with someone who was merely on scholarship wasn't in Cassandra’s plans. Even if you didn’t even know it yet, you were too low on the totem pole to be associated with the future of a daunting legacy. An entire life laid out for Cait before she even took her first breath. 
It was dumb to buzz her up to the apartment. Even more idiotic to respond to her texts in the first place but besides all her failed attempts, she still tries to worm her way through your heart to take what she believes is owed. Just like last week, you let her. 
She leaves when you pretend to fall asleep after, the two of you telling yourselves it’ll be the last time, but it won’t be. 
It’s a vicious cycle, one has your insides spinning, your stomach churning and your heart aching. But you’re too weak to end. It’s a tale as old as time. You want something more and Caitlyn can’t be bothered to be committed to the wrong type of girl. 
It’s all about appearances and you’re not good enough. 
Cassandra, the respectable dean and the mother who is the puppeteer of her daughter’s life, behind the scenes pulling the strings in order to maintain image, status. She holds it closer than her own blood; a need for her bloodline to prosper and Dean Kiramman will trample anyone’s heart to complete the task. 
Whether she wants to fight against her mother’s future or not? You didn’t know. 
Truly, you never know what she wants, besides getting herself off or getting you off, Caitlyn was stuck between a world she’s born for and one that’s decided for her. A child acting out but waiting until college to do so. 
Kirakiller. 
That’s what they called her. Ruthless in all of her conquests, never calling back, never fucking the same girl again, it wasn’t something Kirakiller did. She used, abused, and moved onto the next one. 
But for some reason, she’s incredibly stuck on you. 
The new year puts you at a distance when Cait refuses to bring you home for the holidays. Of course, the fight rages as soon as she’s done fucking you. 
“What do you think this is?” 
“You tell me.” 
There’s a look in your eyes, gleaming and sorrowful, the rejection crystal clear. That’s all any of this has been. A severe procrastination tactic to put off what you want, her. 
What makes it worse is Caitlyn knows it but she’s still here, trying, and who the hell knows why. 
Hope. A poor woman’s faith guts you, ripping your insides of love and prosperity. In your line of vision, you just see claws tearing at your skin, all flesh raw and bleeding as she begs for more. 
A wish that you hope for every time you see her. This time she’ll choose differently, she’ll be kind this time. I’ll be enough to love. This will be the moment. 
But when she doesn’t, the accent you love so much burns you at the stake, you’re screaming on deaf ears. Begging for her to hear just one, but she snuffs you out. Like the moonlight you bring, she pretends you don’t call to her like the moon pulls the tide. 
Instead, you’re met with Caitlyn’s greed. 
“Why do I think this is? I expect some basic level of human compassion but you’ve forgotten that too. I’ve always given you the benefit of the doubt. Even when everyone tells me you’re fucking other girls besides me, even when I see with my own eyes how you act when you think I’m not around. You clearly don’t respect me. Every time I’ve tried to have this conversation, you avoid me. Do you think I deserve that?” 
“There is nothing to even discuss. This is nothing.” Her accent is sharp, cutting right through your heart. A woman you love too deeply reaffirming how little she thinks of you. 
Dismissal. 
Absence. 
You are nothing, might as well have fallen from her lips. 
Her heart is ice cold,  her piercing eyes bite like the bitter wind of winter. A slim view of fire rattling within her dark blue eyes, pupils dilate so much they practically turn black. 
You feel your stomach tense, the pit in your stomach has once returned, denying you of what feels so real to you. 
It’s just a game for her. 
Always a game Caitlyn has to win. 
“Fine. Then leave. But don’t come back next time, don’t text me when you’re lonely or horny, don’t call me when everyone else won’t hear you out. Forgot about me and let’s be done with it, yeah? Go back to those girls you love to fuck so much. The ones that are bright, shiny, untouched by your venomous heart.” 
“I will. They sure will be a hell of a lot better lay than you, maybe they’ll let me fuck their ass.” 
You scoff but your expression is stone cold as you watch her struggle to pull her clothes on. There’s no sudden movements made. Certainly no apologies. 
Once Caitlyn fully dresses, she waits there as if you’ll change your mind. A wish she’s so desperately hanging onto as your eyes remain cold. A shiver is sent up her spine — you’d never been more ruthless — and for the first time her chest feels tight at the loss of you. 
“It’s what you want. A pretty rich thing your mother will accept and the control in the bedroom you need since the real Kiramman controls every aspect of your life, even your love life. Good luck, you’ll need it.” 
“You’ll come begging back, you always do.” 
You want to choke Caitlyn with the smirk she’s currently wearing. 
“We’ll see about that, Kirakiller. Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.” 
In an instant her face drops, her acute lips turning into a frown, cursing under her breath before she finally slams the door. It’s only then do you allow yourself to scream into your pillow, agony coursing through you, desperation, and most of all — a rage that wouldn’t be quenched. 
—
The fairy lights, softly winking at you each time the sequence goes off. Violet craved to put them up around Christmas but never bothered to take them down. Perfectly, they fit with your shared home. The small apartment stuck between the suburbs and the city, close enough to campus where it was only a short drive, the two of you carpooling or Vi moving her schedule around to drop you off. 
It happened to work out for the two of you. You didn’t think you’d get to be so lucky. Finding a decent roommate is a tall order, but now the two of you are inseparable and you couldn’t imagine your life any different. 
If not for her, you didn’t think you'd survive spending the holidays alone. 
Caitlyn made sure to isolate you but Violet holds you close.  
The memory of new years solidifies the budding infatuation growing within you; as much as it excites you, it sends a freezing shiver down your spine. Like a bitter winter to an evergreen bush, who knows if it’ll last the season without one moment to be basked in the sun. 
— 
New Years Eve, 2024. 
Sevika nursing an old fashioned. Trying to avoid the smell of cheap corona and budweiser intruding her relaxed nostrils as Mel sips on a glass of wine. Her smaller frame leans into Sevika’s arm looped through hers as their hips nearly become conjoined. They watch as Violet watches you. You’re standing there alone, fending off a few women who try to make a move on you. 
Whispers of your former fling, Caitlyn Kiramman make their way across campus, the colossal cunt raging her anger during practice. Just as you’ve been reminded by her teammates who blame you for her toddler tantrum. Violet’s heart sinks to her chest as she watches Caitlyn make a straight shot for you. 
The second she entered the room, Violet could feel the dread filling her body. Half because seeing her reminds her of all the horrors, everything she let Caitlyn do to her. Now, Caitlyn’s moved on to her next victim and she wonders if you’ll ever truly escape from her. 
“Do you think we should–” Vi speaks softly, a murmur she didn’t intend for anyone else to hear. “...interrupt?” 
“Calm down, casanova.” Sev interjects letting the whiskey soothe her throat. 
“Easy for you to say, coupled up love birds.” Vi rolls her eyes as she watches the scene unfold before her. 
The light in her eyes cracks, like a sparkler losing its flame. Each time Caitlyn attempts to worm back in your life, you’ve always let her. Even when she’s the last person who deserves even a moment of your time. It takes anything in her not to wince when you let Caitlyn touch your arm but after a moment you push her off. 
Well, that’s new. 
“You should go over there.” Mel chimes in, “Caitlyn would surely run for the hills then. She’s all bark but no bite.” 
“Go be her knight in shining armor.” Sev says it like it’s a bad thing, her sarcasm biting into the air. 
All Vi continues to scratch away at the label unraveling from the condensation, just as her heart rips each time Caitlyn gets closer to you. It’s a strange feeling. Her ex-girlfriend and the person she loves. Nearly spiteful her heart becomes, almost wanting to fling herself off a bridge. It’s more than Vi wishes to deal with and she tells herself she won’t. 
You’re not worth the trouble, she’s just making her feelings bigger than they actually are, right? 
Whatever Caitlyn says pisses you off enough to throw your drink in her face, coating her from hot to toe in the vodka cranberry Vi had made for you earlier in the night. 
“You’ll eat those actions, babygirl. Next time, it’ll be you who is soaked and we both know it.” 
Caitlyn screams for all to hear as she checks you with her shoulder before heading upstairs. 
It’s five minutes before midnight and Violet watches as you crumble, running outside, needing to catch some air. You need something to make you feel less suffocated. Even with a drink thrown in her face, Caitlyn still finds a way to get an upper hand. 
“Vi, would you be a dear and check on her? Sev and I will be there in a sec.” 
“Yeah, sure.” 
Violet sees you in the corner of her eye, trying not to break down, but she notices the tears threatening to spill. 
“Don’t look so glum princess or you’re going to make me cry and nobody wants to see that.”  The lightness of her tone makes you chuckle. Vi’s trying to make you laugh and she succeeds. 
Everyone pours outside as the clock strikes closer to midnight, Mel and Sevika come out but they keep their distance. Vi kneels at your feet, gently wiping the tears away you finally let fall. The small hiccups leaving your chest as you feel inadequate, wondering if anyone would miss you if you just melted away — not a single trace of you to be found. 
“She makes me feel so small, even when I leave, she wants more of me. I have nothing left to give.” You sob, hands shaking as you make fists trying to stabilize yourself. “No one understands how
how fucking awful and addicting she is.” 
“I do.” 
“Of course you, Violet. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. She’s just
” 
“Frustrating?” You nod, trying to laugh off the heartbreak but the familiar glee doesn’t reach your eyes. 
“And now I’m alone, on new years.” You say, cursing at the premature fireworks illuminating the sky. “While she goes to shag whoever wants to clean the vodka cranberry with their tongue.” 
I want to taste the cranberry on yours. 
Violet doesn’t speak those words. It’s just a dream — one that only drips in her mind until her thoughts pull at her like a pomegranate as it sheds from the skin. 
“She’s an idiot for letting you go. Anyone here knows that.” 
“Really? Funny ‘cause I’m here single. Caitlyn just wants me to crawl back to her with me on all fours just so she can say, i told you so, in that insufferable English accent. God, I wanna rip it from her throat.” 
“Then don’t give her the satisfaction.” 
“Easier said than done.” You say as everyone counts down from ten, “At least we still have each other.” 
Vi smiles, her powder-blue eyes sweet on you. There’s nothing more she wants than to kiss you. But Vi will screw the both of you if she moves too quickly. 
3
2
1! 
The buzz of the party reaches an all-time high and you’ve never felt so close to hell. Watching as everyone kisses the person they love, the gleeful-holiday making them smile as they wrap in the warmth of their partner. Vi sees how sad you are, how close you are to breaking, so she does something stupid. An action that will only get her heart in all kinds of trouble. 
Nearly almost planting her lips on yours, but saves herself with a peck to the apple of your cheeks. 
She blushes and you smile. 
She considers it to be a win when she gets a positive reaction from you. That’s all she really wants, to hear you laugh and you do. 
Again. 
The both of you speak nothing of it, the heartache too heavy and the love in Violet’s eyes too bright. You rest your head against her shoulder as the both of you watch the fireworks shining the midnight sky — it feels awfully like a fresh start. 
God knows you could use one. 
— 
The last thing you want is to miss her but you do. 
Longing instilled the moment she infected your blood; making each beat of your heart consistently flow for her. You couldn’t admit it, not her or yourself. It’s what she counts on. For you to slip, to venture back into the lion’s just so she can gut you from root to stem. 
With your finger hovering over her number for the past few weeks, each time, nearly a moment from giving back into her needs. Not once had she called, texted, or even looked at your way. Not even when she sat across from you in the library last Monday. Before her tongue found home in the girl who threw herself in Caitlyn’s lap. Promptly deciding that was enough studying for the day. 
The nights are the worst, you stay secluded in your room, tired of thinking about her and everything that’s transpired. How much you miss her, how much you love her — wondering if you ever should have — and how much you clung to this version of her that maybe just never existed. 
It isn’t until Vi tries to get you out of the house that you realize how heartbroken you actually feel. How unbearable it would be to do anything but the bare minimum that’s expected for you to survive. 
“C’mon, it won’t be bad.” Vi throws herself in bed with you, “You’re with me you’ll have a fantastic time.” 
Vi cheekily smiles, “Plus, I can’t go without you. Those are the rules.” 
“Oh really?” She nods, the sincerity reaching her eyes so blindingly, it makes the swell in your chest ache. 
“Basically the law, so if you don’t want me to handcuff you, you’ll listen.” 
Raising an eyebrow at the question, you watch her as your roommate goes into the closet and comes out with three dresses back in hand. 
“You always look, um u-uh, really pretty in these.” 
Violet’s always been like this. Unsure, a little bit flirty, and with a heart so gentle you would be too afraid to hold it in the palm of your hand. All it took was one introduction from Sevika and the two of you instantly clicked. 
You cooked at the housewarming party for Mel and Sevika, in the middle of having a breakdown when you didn’t have crucial ingredients you thought you did have. It’s when Violet came to your rescue. Already in the kitchen watching you nearly have a panic attack over not being better prepared, she instantly grabbed the keys to her truck, off to assist. 
With your former roommate flaking out after the second semester in your apartment off campus, and Violet coming off a messy breakup, the two of you helped each other out. 
“Which one is your favorite?” It’s an innocent question. 
It really is. 
Then you remember the last time you wore it, Violet unable to keep her eyes off you when she thought you weren’t looking or how she would meet your eyes when you caught her staring. Dramatically clearing her throat as she scratches the nape of her neck, bashfully blushing. 
“The black one. You always look beautiful, any of them really. That one is just my favorite.” 
Feeling the fabric of the silk dress, the neckline is plunging and the back is open until it reaches your lower back and you don't dare bend down to pick up anything in this little number. 
“Someone’s being sweet tonight.” You smile softly, kissing her cheek before you disappear into the bathroom. It’s long before you come out, but when you’re ready Vi nearly has to do a double take. 
Visibly, she gulps. 
Fuck, she forgot how amazing you look in that dress. 
“Where’s it at this time?” 
“You remember Natalie?” 
“Oh?” 
“It’s not—” 
“I didn’t say it was.” But you’re smirking and Vi has no other option but to groan into her hands. 
“You were thinking about it.” Harmlessly, you shrug. 
“Regardless, it’s some new girl who’s gonna be on the team this season. It’s kind of a get together before the season starts.” 
“You’re taking me to the kick-off banquet?” Vi winces as your voice shrieks, slightly piercing her eardrum in the process. 
“Uh,” Vi runs a hand through her vibrant, messy head of hair. “Uh, yeah. It’s really not a big deal.” 
“So, why not Natalie?” 
“Does it matter?” Vi counters. She becomes uncomfortable about how she would have to answer the question. There wasn’t a way for her to answer without fully exposing herself so she pulls at her cuticles until she’s slightly bleeding before she stuffs them inside her pockets. 
She doesn't want to have the conversation, and honestly, neither do you. 
“The she-devil won’t be there. Doesn’t that sound wonderful? One night for yourself, there’s a little dancing, we can have a couple of drinks—” 
“Y-You’ll dance with me
in front of everyone?” You sound more unsure of yourself than you ever have. The words are foreign on your tongue as if you’re speaking another language. 
“Is that a statement or a question?” Vi chuckles before she stands up from your bed, “Give me ten minutes and we’ll head out. We can stop and get some burgers. The food they cater is ass anyways. All that money from the snobby rich parents and Piltover University can’t even splurge on anything decent.” 
It doesn’t take long before she’s emerging into the living room, her white button up has the top three buttons undone, the tattoos creeping on the outside of her neck visible as does her name she has on her cheek. The one you chastise her for consistently. 
“You ready?” Violet stuffs her essentials in her deep pockets before taking you in. 
“Yeah, I think so, I was just waiting for you.” 
She seriously has to assume your exes are severely ill for ever letting you out of their sight. Violet despises how rapid the beat of her heart is, how shaky her hands become when she offers a hand to help you off the couch. Only two nights ago, it was the two of you cuddled up, Vi shrieking in fear from your favorite horror film. 
The terror in her powder-blue eyes made you laugh. Violet sees it as a big enough consolation for her downright distress. 
You’re too gorgeous for your own good. 
She may be pushing her luck tonight. Even pulling you out of bed makes her feel slightly accomplished. Between work and class, your mattress has been your chosen place to nurse your heartache. A few of your friends had been in and out, trying to get you to grab a fresh breath of air, or find the bottom of a bottle of tequila but all had failed. 
“You look
.” You bite your lip, watching as your eyes drag over her frame, overwhelmed by just how well she cleans up. 
“That bad, huh?” Violet smirks as she makes her way over to you, and with your heels, she can’t help but admire your height. She supposes she does have a type. Who can blame her? 
“Something like that.” Your face is burning, the world doesn’t seem so bleak when she locks the door with one hand, her left warm-calloused hand holding yours in a firm grip. 
“How do I look?” You do a twirl, there’s a smile you try to contain when her eyes drag over you, taking all the time in the world as open the door to her truck, guiding you inside. 
“You look beautiful but that’s no surprise, princess.” 
The drive is quiet. Violet itches to place the palm of her hand on your thigh but she resists. With a quiet mind, she listens as you ramble about a new album you listened to earlier and she hands you her phone so you can play it. Immediately, you’re bewildered at the trust. 
Caitlyn wouldn’t even let you use her phone when yours died. Ordering the uber herself as she left you on the curb as she took her sports car and faded into the intersecting street. 
It’s only a twenty minute drive to the diner and the red neon sign greets you, the outside wall painted in a pastel-yellow, it’s gaudy and nearly unpleasant to the eye but there’s the charm about it. Zaun outlasted the gentrification of the corporate pollution, still one of the only places to remain standing and family owned. 
You’re led to a booth where you both take a seat, glancing over the menu as you decide what you want, trying to make a decision in your mind is something that drowns you like a misty fog at the crack of dawn. 
Finally you settle on a burger and so Violet. The conversation is easy with her. Everything seems to flow with a simpleness you find yourself reaching for. Like the last copy of your favorite book at the library, you crave to wrap your fingers around the crispy edges, sinking your smell into the spine of a new novel. Where the beginning feels like a first kiss — blissful notions of someone new — when the thought of love doesn’t seem so jarring. 
Before you’re terrified of getting your heart shattered into a million pieces. Before love morphs into something violent, you turn to Violet and you wonder if she’s ever been scared to love. Does it come easy for her? Would she let herself go for the right person? You feel too broken to ever let yourself fall that freely again. 
But she has blue eyes, a scar on her upper lip making her more charming, and tattoos adorning her back that only attribute to the surface level of her allure.  
Shortly after you sink into your thoughts, ones you don’t believe you should even have, you're ravaging your burger when Violet notices the attention you're getting. It’s obvious. To everyone. But you just talk to her about anything but the elephant in the room, you’re so chatty tonight she might even think you’re nervous. 
But it’s Vi. There’s nothing to ever be nervous about. 
Nothing at all. 
“God, this was such a good call. Who knew I needed to bury my sorrows in a pound of grease.” 
“Carbs. They are a beautiful thing.” Vi winks, you chunk a fry at her but she catches it in her mouth. 
You finish your food in silence, Vi smiling as she takes another sip from the cane-sugar coca cola. The sweetness of the syrup  coats the back of her throat as she watches you watch her. She wants to say something but the timing is wrong. She wonders if you see a future or a rebound, maybe even just a friend, only time can tell and Vi fears she would wait a lifetime waiting for you to figure it out. 
It’s how she loves. Free, without restrictions, even if she still mourns the love she once had burned to flames — you make her forget it all. Renewed in holy water, she basks in a touch that hasn’t scorned her, freely washing her of past sins.  
“What happened to Natalie? I thought things were good.” 
“For a time, yeah.” Violet says something without saying much. 
“Vi, are you being coy?” 
The blush coats her cheeks as she tries to shy away from the conversation. She feels the heat from your attention, the way her heart beats a million times per second as you have her cornered. Different in a way she would typically imagine when you came to mind. Even if she does try to stop herself, Vi can’t help but wonder about you and if you would feel the same way she does. 
If you do and just aren’t allowing yourself to let go of the wall you have up in the horrendous shape of Caitlyn Kiramman.  
The way you pry, your bold eyes slightly squinting at her as if you’re already figuring out the self-righteousness of the sinner. Secrets she hides under lock and key but even on a good day, the confession bubbles on her tongue as she catches herself choking on her own spit. You’re always so careful of the questions you leave hanging in the air. 
In a moment of frustration, Violet thinks of how Caitlyn’s manipulative patterns may have sinked into your brain. She knows that much — the blue-haired witch has done the same to her. Making you question everyone’s motives, wondering if anyone could ever be truthful. 
But others can. 
Caitlyn can’t. 
Vi distracts herself, avoids the question even if it is just a second to recollect her thoughts, a minute to buy time and divert from this conversation. It’s a truth she doesn't want unraveled. 
“What’s the saying? Don’t kiss and tell.” She grumbles as she stuffs her face with another bite of the beefy patty. “But we just didn’t work out s’all. Plus, I’m not looking for anything serious I guess. She was.” 
Another lie but Vi keeps her lips tight. She doesn’t need you to know why her latest attempt at a relationship blew up in her face, catastrophically. 
“Maybe you and Kirakiller should date again.” You tease. 
“Take that back. She’s the devil’s spawn and I’m still sorry you learned the difficult way. Just like me.” 
“Well, she definitely lives up to the name.” 
“I wish she would have changed her ways. You didn’t deserve to get hurt at all and especially by her.” Violet reaches across the table, soothing the back of your hand, rubbing circles into your skin. The action is sweet, lighting your skin ablaze with goosebumps as you watch her show affection, especially where other people can see. 
At the moment, you want to be claimed by her. Marked as Violet’s girl and you would be proud to be. You close the thought from your mind as soon as it opens. This isn’t a date. Just because Violet flirts doesn’t mean she’s interested. The two of you are roommates. 
Pull yourself together. 
Jesus Christ. 
She knows how much everyone can’t stop looking at you. The diner, outside the gas station even when Vi told you to stay in the car, and then the banquet. But you latched onto her, practically glued to her side as new sponsors came to speak with the new head captain. Vi’s nursing a beer when the music hits and she grins. 
“Are you ready for this?” 
What is she talking about? 
Vi latches her hand with yours as she pulls you to the open floor, only a few couples begin to lightly sway to the classical being played. It’s different from what she was used to but she was nothing if not resourceful. 
“I don’t bluff, princess, and I certainly don’t lie.” Vi tugs you close as you make no arguments, she leads as you find shining faith in her eyes. 
It’s a new feeling, unfamiliar as it courses through your body. Vi isn't ashamed of you, as a friend, as a roommate; she’s full of warmth when she glances at you. Sending a sense of belonging through your skin, a home you want to throw yourself in before the foundation has even been laid. 
Violet’s too good at this. You secretly love it but you pretend like you hate it. As if getting attention from someone as kind and hot as her is a bad thing. It’s nearly too much, almost making you sick with how much you’re enjoying being held by someone who actually wants to hold you. 
She’s not playing chess and using you as a pawn. 
It’s a recurring thought you have to remind yourself of, she’s not Caitlyn. 
Violet doesn’t make promises she doesn’t keep, she doesn’t say careless compliments to only have sex with you. With a firm palm on your back, calluses kissing your spine, she’s looking at you — so much so it feels as if she’s looking right through you. 
 “You don’t have to—” She twirls you around before you can protest, guiding you back into her gentle care. 
Vi shrugs, “There’s a lot you don’t know about me princess but I’d never go back on my word.” 
The other couples start to move on the dance floor as each song blends into the next. 
“That’s refreshing.” 
Violet hand placed on your exposed back feels so warm it nearly burns her skin. Leaning in, leaning her head against yours. You smell of vanilla and something else entirely too sweet, maybe jasmine or fresh lilies. The delicate breath kissing your neck feels tempting. You would never consider yourself to be a siren, but with each promise laced up in your tongue, you wish to serenade her into a future with you. 
“So are you, sweetheart.” Violet pulls away just enough to look at you, her temple presses against yours. 
You can hear the shake in her breath, her grip around her back tightening like she’s trying to restrain herself. But she doesn’t restrain, she leans in, the tip of her pierced nose kissing yours. If either of you moved an inch forward, your lips could taste hers. 
Is her chapstick cherry, strawberry, or maybe even blueberry? They look irresistible as the glisten, you need to crave the ache deriving from your bones. Violet has itched herself into every part of your life and she’s the only one to make you feel a sliver of joy again. 
“We should
” The dazed woman doesn’t even know what she’s pleading for. This is all she’s been wanting but somehow her heart is pulling away, terrified to be crushed under the unforgiving weight of rejection. 
“Yeah.” You say. Somehow understanding what she wishes for, silently you’re able to see her exposed skin, raw to the notion of a love dying to bloom in the beginning of spring. 
Violet kisses your cheek again and somehow you feel the warmth of the fresh season. In the February rain, there is still sunshine spilling over the clouds — washing you in hope again. 
— 
The rest of your life fell back in place as if she never existed, except the ache in your heart that wouldn’t stop. You did your best to ignore it. Word got around Caitlyn went back to fiercely fucking. Apparently instead of sleeping just once a week while she was with you, she went back to her ever-growing appetite, nearly every night. It isn’t too difficult for her; not when there’s a line of women waiting to be at her beck and call. 
You threw yourself into your studies, picking more shifts at the bar and hoping she doesn’t pull any of her usual stunts, showing up drunk and begging to fuck. 
One more time, baby. This could be good for the both of us. 
Caitlyn uprooted the past semester of uni and she didn’t even have the decency to apologize. All your friends with a knowing look of — I told you so — without actually dispersing the words from their tongue. It feels too much like a blurry dream but Sevika is good at making you smile. Even if you wanna throw yourself against a wall until the memory of Kirakiller fades for good. 
The night had been busier than expected but nothing you and Sevika couldn’t handle. Even if there’s an ache in your knees, the muscles in your shoulders strained, it feels nice to just work. Everything flees your mind, all the insecurities bubbling inside you escaping to get out. The emotions you’re attempting to keep at bay and failing. 
“You good, kid?” 
“Yeah, life’s just a shit fire. Nothing new.” 
Continuing to wipe the bar down for new customers, you clean off some glasses in front of you, as you dry your hands on a clean towel before tending to the other side of the bar. 
The rest of the night comes to you in a blur. You’re flirty enough with the men to ensure a nice tip but when one tries to get too handsy, you tell them to fuck off or Sevika will throw them out. They eye up her frame as she makes her way over, height hitting at over six feet, her muscles visible through the fitted black tank she chose tonight. If you didn’t know any better, she would terrify you. 
“Got a problem here?” 
“I’m not sure, what about you boys? Do you think there’s an issue?” 
With a quick shake to their heads, they take a nervous sip of their beer and the rest of the night goes along swimmingly. It’s last call when you spot the familiar pink-haired roommate, nursing her second bottle of beer it seems. 
“How long has she been here?” 
“Came during the rush for you, but didn’t wanna bother you. She’s been waiting for a few hours.” 
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Your tone goes high and squirrelly, murderous eyes finding her glimmering, silver eyes. 
“Well, it's only Vi, right?” Sevika smirks. 
That itself was a loaded question. If you’d been asked six months ago, it would have been a flat friend but now Vi had somehow turned into a friend. The almost-kiss you’ve been having dreams about. How she would kiss you — would it be tender — or would she be depraved about it in a way that would have you bruising your knees at the speed of lighting. 
“Stop that. Vi is as harmless as a puppy.” 
“Sure. Keep telling yourself that.” 
“Wasn’t Kirakiller here last month waiting for you and you didn’t bat an eye? Plus, the only thing she seems to be jealous of is Vi. The diva had a meltdown when she saw Vi picking you up after the end of your shift last week, or that’s just what I heard.” 
“Mel needs to stop telling you so much.” 
“Pillow talk. It’s a beautiful thing. Isn’t it?” 
Rolling your eyes, you throw your apron at her, collecting your tips for the night. Vi still looks innocent as ever, Gert making friendly conversation with her as you just watch her. Her thick, wool beanie matches her hair and you can’t help but think of how cute she looks. Her fingerless gloves you always chastise her about, doing very little to keep her warm. 
You knew she had a date tonight. Hell, it makes you nervous why she’s even here. Racking your brain with some excuse to get you out of this. What’s so important she couldn’t wait until you got home? She waits up for you every night. Doesn’t let herself fall asleep until she hears the familiar jingle of your keys outside the door. Pretending to read the book in her hands like she’s casually perched on the couch at three in the morning for any other reason. 
“Well, she’s one of the good ones and I’m not.” 
You’re frustrated as you split the tips, handing Sevika her half. Things with Vi had been more than complicated. You weren’t sure if you were over Caitlyn but you also knew things with Vi were getting closer to an edge you couldn’t come back from.
The flashbacks of the banquet you attended as her plus one just a few weeks ago haunt you. Her lips so close to yours, the hitch in her breath and whimper you let out that stopped it all. 
You would be an idiot to ruin the best friend you’ve ever had. A deep secret buried in your mind tells you how much of a bigger idiot you would be if you let her slip right through your fingers. 
“Doesn’t matter if you are or not. She sees something in you. Count yourself lucky. Oh, and before you head off Mel wants to invite you over for Valentine’s. Some big party she’s throwing. You know how she is. Be there or she’ll come and find you if you resist.” 
The wink Sevika sends you is insufferable. Similar to her attitude this entire night. 
“Yeah yeah, tell Mel I’ll be there.” 
“Now that’s the loving spirit, lovergirl.” 
You make your way over and Gert’s hand is touching Vi’s forearm, a look in your eyes that sends an annoying pit to your stomach. Gert’s eyes flutter and her smirk is evident but Vi only gulps when you make your way over. 
Gert may just take your attitude for tiredness but Vi knows better. Your two seconds from blowing up the way your jaw is clenched, teeth grinding as you fight to act like a complete and utter cunt. Vi’s a very pretty girl. Women flirt with her all the time. It’s not anything you didn’t know but to see it up and close was new for you. 
As was the jealousy practically sprouting out of you. 
“Well call me, yeah?” Gert’s eyes sparkle, dodging you entirely as she walks away and into the back. 
Violet gulps as it’s just the two of you. 
“Why are you here?” You snip, arms crossed over your chest, unknowingly making your cleavage even more apparent. “Sev says you’ve been here for hours.” 
“I came to see you but you looked busy.” 
“Mhm, yeah. Busy. You look awfully busy.” 
“Don’t do that.” 
But you ignore her. 
You rolled your eyes, the irritation raging within you. Fucking Gert. You drunkenly told her about your confusing feelings for Vi and she took that as Vi's single. It’s slim pickings out there but fuck, did Vi have to entertain it right in front you? 
But you didn’t like to think about how she did. You weren’t dating, you weren’t fucking, you essentially were just roommates who cuddled sometimes, or went on these almost dates with and almost kissed. 
Vi hasn't been dating since Natalie but she’s free to do as she pleases. It’s a colossal hit to your pride but you can’t be mad. You are, but you can’t be. 
You really cannot be doing this. 
Vi is just a friend. Only a friend. That’s it.  
“I’m going but Gert will be off soon. Goodnight, Vi.” 
It’s short and not so sweet. Swiftly turning around as you are practically running out the door. The chill of February hits you first and then you hear Vi and her voice calling after you but you just keep walking. Hoping she’ll give up and go back. You’re a lost cause, anyone with eyes can see it. 
“Would you stop running away?” You turn around and Vi is so close that she runs into you, her arms wrapping around your waist to stop you from falling. “Jesus, are you insane? It’s fucking freezing out here. I don’t care if you’re mad right now, I’m driving us home.” 
“Violet, let me—” 
“No. You’re not getting sick. It’s past midnight. It’s not safe. We are not arguing about this.” You pout as she holds your hand and practically drags you back to her black truck. Opening the door for you as you get in, shutting the door once you’re situated before she gets in on the other side. 
Igniting the engine, it revs on and while the car warms up Vi sighs, rather loudly. She’s always good about waiting until she calms down to speak. Letting the anger roll off her, the frustration you’re sure was caused by you. She slides the beanie off her head as the car reaches a normal temperature and runs her fingers through beautiful pink strands being kissed by the light of the moon. 
The natural fluff to the strands is restored, no longer inflated by the beanie you had embroidered her full name on. You can’t keep your eyes off of her. She must feel it because Vi catches your gaze and instantly her eyes go soft. It’s too much so you turn your eyes away; focusing on the snow falling on the windshield. 
“What’s going on? I’ve been patient for weeks but something changed and you’re not telling me.” 
“I’m not sure what you want me to say.” 
“The truth would be a good place to start.” 
Vi sighs, again, when you’re silent. No smartass rebuttal, no snide remark, not even an exasperated curse underneath your breath. Complete and utter silence.
But you feel trapped.
You’re terrified. Vi is too warm, loving, and painfully-pure. She might not know it, but she’s the girl you come back for. The one who you bring home to meet the family, the one who will bring you breakfast in bed when you feel under the weather and the one who will make sure you feel loved every single day. 
When other people figure that out, if Gert does, it’s over for you. Because maybe it was foolish, pathetic, and possibly tragic but you were just trying to sort yourself out long enough to see if you want those things with her. Now, it’s only a matter of time before she dotes on someone else who can give her everything she deserves. 
You should let her have this, it’s far better than her pleading eyes begging for something you’re not sure you can give. Caitlyn broke pieces you're not sure are repairable, parts of yourself that can’t be put back together. You didn’t even realize you had been crying until Vi’s wiping away your tears. 
The pad of her thumb is careful as she wipes all the tears away. 
“Tell me what’s wrong, princess. It’s just you and me.” 
“I-I can’t. It’s too
I just can’t.” You confess, sniffling as you try and calm yourself down. 
Vi guides you into the crook of neck as she does her best to hold you over the middle console of her truck. “It’s okay, princess. Shh, I’m right here.” It’s then that your sobs wrack your body and Vi decides she needs you as close as possible. Using her strength, she brings you into her lap, wrapping her tight arms around you as you sob into her neck. Salty tears stain Vi’s neck but she really doesn’t care. 
All she cares about is you. 
“It’s about Kiramman, isn't it?” 
Vi can’t hide her disdain for the woman. That much is clear as day. Whatever happened with the two of them burned deep. 
“Maybe murder isn’t such a bad thing.” 
“Vi.” You chuckle half heartedly. 
“There’s that smile..” You lift your head from the safety of her warmth, pressing your forehead against hers. Your breath is heavy on her lips, staring at the beautiful scar, the plumpness to her lips practically staring right at you. Close enough to see the constellations of freckles littered across her full cheeks. 
Your timing is awful but your heart gives into Violet’s gaze, lips falling closer together to hers. 
“Don’t make it like this.” Vi whispers, her powder-blue eyes gleaming at you. 
“What?” 
“Don’t kiss me for the first time because you’re sad about her. I can’t be her runner up. I’ve been playing that for too long.” 
“I won’t kiss you, not if you don’t want me to.” 
The tears are still fresh, but this need churning within you isn’t. Since the moment you met Vi, you’ve been fighting it. Fighting this. 
“Fuck, I do but,” Vi stalls when you unzip her leather jacket, revealing her wrapped chest, abs on display. “Shit, princess.” 
Fingers playing with the button of her trousers, waiting for her to push you away but she doesn’t. She does nothing of the sort. Vi’s breath is heavier than you’ve ever heard it. Looking down at your hands, waiting for you to pull the trigger on all of this. It’s then you realize Vi is letting you have all the control. If this is going to happen, she wants you to take it. It’s different from what you’re used to. 
A choice. 
It’s more than you could have expected. Vi isn’t pushing you away, isn’t telling you to stop. Not when you unbutton her pants and not when you suck on your fingers before slipping them beneath her boxers, feeling the soft curls and wondering if they match the drapes, before your fingers get perfectly acquainted with her. 
“Oh fuck—” Vi curses as she grabs onto your ass, lifting the short skirt you’ve been wearing all night, rucking it up to your hips as she sinks her nails into the skin. 
When you slip inside her, she clenches around your fingers, fucking her hips into your pace and Vi struggles to contain the whimpers. They flow out of her like a tidal wave. She’s been thinking about this moment with you for so long, just you and her — it’s the only thing Vi wants. 
When Vi saw you tonight she thought it was absolutely ridiculous for you to wear this strapless top, only because your nipples poked through the small fabric, but now she’s grateful you did. It’s easy to slip as she sucks a pierced nipple into her mouth. Her tongue plays with the barbell, causing you to groan as she pinches and delicately pulls at the other. As Vi kitten licks your nipple, she finds home on your ass again, before ripping your panties off. 
Her mouth is eager, hot, as she won’t stop giving attention to your chest. You’ve never wanted to kiss her more. 
“Can you take two, princess?” 
Eagerly you nod, a yearning yes falls from your lips. Vi doesn’t waste a beat. 
You try to fuck Vi harder, but she doubles down on her efforts, her fingers so deep and you feel so full. Trying to chase the high, you ride her fingers, almost as if you were riding her, your ass unable to stop humping against her. It’s just the two of you, a silent competition to get the other one off first and you can feel Vi winning. Then she’s extending her thumb, rubbing circles on your clit, and you know you’ve lost. 
“That’s it, just like that princess.” 
“Vi, Vi, baby, oh my godddddd—” 
Vi’s purely evil with every thrust of her fingers but she’s so full of light, an angel sent to you in your darkest hour. Batting her long eyelashes at you while she suckles on your bouncing tits, knuckle deep inside you as she gives you everything to just take. She’s too beautiful to look away from. With her pupils dilated, her blue eyes darker than you’ve ever seen them. Letting off your perfect tits with an obnoxious pop, she kisses up your sternum as she marks you with her lips everywhere but the place you actually want. 
But then her words revere in your mind once again. 
Don’t make it like this. 
“Look at me.” 
Eyes drifting back to her as she curls her fingers inside you, your grip on her hair iron tight, unwillingly to let go of you. 
“Such a beautiful girl, so special, so pretty when you form a sentence. The most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen. There’s no need to be jealous, babygirl, don’t need anyone else but you. Mhm, just you, alright? Yeah? Keep looking at me, yeah baby, just like this.” 
You nod, close to the brink, her compliments send a rush through your head and your throbbing clit feels it. 
The most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen. 
“Baby, I, shitttt Violettttt—” 
The name of her full name, the first time she’s ever heard it fall from your lips since the first time you met. Vi’s too close and hearing you scream her name isn’t helping. 
“C’mon, princess. Show me how pretty you can be.” Vi commands and you come undone around her fingers. 
Arching your back against the steering wheel, and the horn blows. 
You giggle and so does she but the soft moment is short lived as your body twitches, selfishly basking in the way you irrevocably coated her fingers in your cum. 
Bringing Violet with you as you pull at her hair, her face planting on on your chest as your breasts smother her moans as she jumps off the cliff with you. Sucking at the flesh, marking what she craves as you fuck yourself on her fingers, her pace even more brutal as Vi coaxes you through your blindingly, hot orgasm. 
“Just like that princess, pussy just can’t stop drenching for me, yeah? My pretty girl can paint my face next time. Do you want that? My face covered in your cum, dribbling down my chin, on my tits
you’ll clean me up though. A good girl like you will. So fuckin’ pretty.” 
One slap to your ass has you trembling, body shaking and that’s when Vi lays off, her fingers slipping out of you and you feel so empty without her. 
As if you didn’t need any more torture, you watch as she lavishes at her fingers, covered in your cum, her high cheekbones suctioning as she sucks every last drop. Vi smirks as you drool a little bit before you wipe the saliva off. Sweet as always, she doesn’t say a word. Saving you the embarrassment from a crude joke. 
One Caitlyn would definitely make. 
“Um, sorry, I think I got carried away.” 
“We both did, it’s okay, Vi.” 
There’s a soft silence, it would almost become cumbersome if it wasn’t so peaceful. The only thing you can hear is her exhale of breath as Vi tries to regain some composure. All of it feels complicated, the severed tie to Caitlyn doesn’t seem so entirely severed when her ex-girlfriend makes you come in the driver’s seat of her truck. 
If anyone found out about this, about the two of you, it would be the talk of the town. Caitlyn’s exes making a victory lap in Kirakiller’s grave. The victory is so triumphant even the goddess on top of the mountain gets scorched. It’s your worst nightmare. Your wish is to coddle this as long as you can. Savor the feeling, keeping Vi under lock and key. 
You just want to have this one thing for yourself. 
Even if you are far from her reach, she has a way of making sure any good thing gets ripped from you, torn from your hands before you even have a second to enjoy. As much as you enjoyed her company, this complicates. 
But it doesn’t stop your heart from thumping loudly. A shiver runs up your spine as Vi pulls down your skirt. There’s a tenderness to her touch as she fixes your top, covering your chest once again. You nearly lock your lips with hers when she rubs your full cheeks with the pad of her thumb, smoothing along her jaw as she leans in to kiss the tip of your nose.  Unable to snuffle it, you smile. 
It’s genuine when the light reaches your eyes. Vi says nothing, anything would be too heavy, something neither of you are ready for. A silent agreement to enjoy this moment for what it is. 
“Are you doing anything for Valentines? Mel and Sevika are having this party and I thought you might wanna go together.” The panic surges through her powder-blue eyes the moment she asks the question. 
Is that why she came tonight? Did she want to ask you? 
Reminding you of the first night you met, a party and Sevika and Mel’s but you find yourself to be in an entirely different position. The idea of a date without the pressure, you’d be surrounded by your friends. But you tremor with the thought of Violet wanting to spend Valentine’s day with you. 
“But it’s, um, perfectly fine if you already have plans. It's just I don’t want to spend it alone. Powder is off spending it with Ekko this year, Vander is doing god knows what and Silco well, that would just be pathetic if I asked him what his plans are. I really just—” 
“Violet.” 
Violet.
Violet. 
Violet. 
The second it rolls off your tongue, a crimson hue forms on her freckled cheeks, even spreading across the bridge of her nose before it coats the tips of her ears. A soft pink unlike her vibrant locks of messy hair, partially due to your tugging and pulling. 
“Sorry, Vi. It just slipped.” 
“No. I mean not no. I wasn’t trying to be rude. You can call me, Violet, if you want to.” 
I like hearing you say my name, it sounds even more beautiful than when you whispered it falling apart on my fingers. 
But Vi couldn’t say that. 
“Well then, Violet, I would love to go with you. Count me in.” 
She didn’t need to know you already had plans on going. This was much better. 
— 
Mel decides to take you up on the offer of studying at the library tonight. With your future hanging on by the thread that is your scholarship, you have to keep your grades airtight. Not to mention the downfall of your situation with Caitlyn only puts a bullseye on your back. 
The first couple of hours have been silent for the two of you, the accountability keeping you in check to stay focused. Then the third hour approaches and the two of you start to quietly converse in the nearly vacant library. 
“Did Sev tell you who came into Leagues last night?” 
Shutting your book, your eyes squint in confusion. 
“Kiramman.” 
“I thought the ship had sailed away during that fight. God, it nearly made me want to strangle her and we all know violence is more of Sev’s choice of resolution.” 
“It has. She likes checking in on her so-called
wounded. She’s never been one for grace. I wish she would make it less obvious, Leagues isn’t even her scene. Her pompous ass would never be caught dead in there when we were, well, whatever the fuck you would call us. But she’s been quite the regular ever since I cut things off. 
It’s surprising she would come to you, but on the other hand, she didn’t know where you lived. It was the only straw for her to grasp on. It’s probably killing her to know she’s been blocked on everything, no contact, a complete ghost town. Almost as if none of you even existed together, just a memory faded, one you hope to burn into ash. 
“Well, Vi was there hanging out with Gert and—” 
“She was?” 
Mel suddenly felt like she said something she shouldn’t have. 
“Appearances can be deceiving, they did talk for a bit, yes, but how does that have any level of importance?” Mel can’t hide her lips upturning. 
“Nothing.” 
“Hey kid, lighten up. I think you’re two seconds away from snapping that pencil in half.” The rasp of Sevika’s voice pulls you back to earth, but it’s too late for the pencil as the infrastructure snaps. You feel like a child, caught in doing something they shouldn’t do. 
“Oh, so this is a thing? Vi?” Mel almost speaks a little too loudly, her voice reaching endless limits as the object of your affection is named in the very silent library. “I just thought you wanted to make Kirakiller jealous. Not actually
” 
You bury your head in your notebook, wanting to strangle Sevika as you hear her chuckle, taunting you as your traitorous heart fails you in your time of need. Maliciously giving you up as your tragic negligence exposes you truly. 
Even if it’s silly, needy, or a little bit selfish — you wanted this one part of your life to be concealed from beady eyes. 
“Finally coming to your senses.” Sevika taunts. 
“Enough. I’m not
Violet and aren’t
that’s not what this is.” 
Mel gives you a knowing look, arching her perfectly arched eyebrow, hazel eyes with a ring of gold surrounding them piercing so deeply into your soul. It almost has you stuttering out how you let her fuck you in Violet’s truck, driving you back home with her warm, soft hand on your exposed thigh. Absentmindedly drawing circles into your skin. 
“Violet?” Sevika and Mel say in unison. 
“Did I say something wrong?” 
“Vi doesn’t let anyone call her that. The only one who's ever called her that is well, her family. She yelled at Kirakiller for calling her that whenever they fought. Vi looked like she could rip her tongue out.” 
The information makes your head spin, there is only so much you can take. 
“It’s just a name. Seems like Vi is preoccupied anyways. This is just so
” 
“Hey Vi!” 
You turn around, hearing her greet someone she was friendly with. In her athletic shorts and cleats, it’s clear practice had started again, her gym bag in tote. The sweat and grime layered over her face, the sleeves of her jersey rolled into her shoulders. With each movement, her muscles rippled in the dim lighting of the library. 
The navy blue jersey complimented her vibrant strands of pink, she laughs at whoever she’s talking to and she looks so happy and at peace, it makes your heart soar. Rugby always made her the happiest. Vander and Vi used to play when she was just a girl, even Powder joined as they got older but when Violet got stronger, she restricted for playing seriously with classmates her own size and not old men whose knees could give out in any second. 
She still doesn’t see you and you want to keep it that way so you turn around, minding your own even if your two closest friends in the world just watched you gawk over Violet. 
“It’s just going to get worse. Living together. It’s only a matter of time until one of you
” Sevika gestures to the pencil lying broken on the table. 
“Well, try not to act too disheartened at the party. Vi said she’s bringing someone. I’m sure it won’t work out between them. Ever since she’s gotten here she hasn’t been able to—” 
Sevika places her hand on Mel, to cue her to silence herself as Vi walks up to the table, grabbing the chair closest to you and discreetly pushes it even closer to you when she takes her seat. 
Immediately, you chastise yourself for loving how turned on you are by her sweaty body, her muscles clearly acquiring the pump from her practice, those stupid strong calves brushing against yours. You admire the scar against her top lip. Tattoos on display, making your head feel dizzy, and she leans over and asks if she can have a couple of your orange slices. Before falling right back in conversation with Sevika. 
Violet does anything to be close to you. Mel and you are engrossed in a conversation, when she shows you the video you were discussing, Vi has to lean over to see. Her arm hanging off your shoulder, her neck craning to see but when she sits back, she keeps her arm around the back of your chair. 
“How did practice go today?” You ask. 
“Fine.” But the grass stains on her shirt tell you differently, so does the burn on her exposed shin. 
“Who the fuck did you let kick your ass?” Sevika interjects before you have the chance to. 
“Can’t kick Kirakiller’s ass. Dean Kiramman might throw me out faster than I can blink. I’m already on thin ice and Kirakiller just made it worse. She doesn’t like losing.” 
Violet glances at you, her expression unreadable as she turns her attention back to Sevika. 
“Got outvoted for Team Captain and she can’t fucking stand it. You know the pompous Kirammans don't believe in democracy. One for all and all for none. Some bullshit Kirakiller says while she’s trying to out-bench me in the weight room. Not my fucking problem. Hasn’t been for a while. She went in for some cheap blows during drills. It is what it is.” 
Sevika nods her head, “Seems like you did a real number on her. She shouldn’t have fumbled half of this table.” 
“Sev.” You shoot a glaring warning. 
Violet visibly tenses but she doesn’t remove her arm, Mel elbowing Sev in the gut softly before she coughs up a quiet apology. The tension could be cut with a knife, but Violet just plays with the material of your cotton shirt, soothing herself as she tries to forget. 
“Right, yep.” An awkward silence disperses before Mel and Sevika excuse themselves leaving you and Violet alone. 
“Violet, I can talk to her. She shouldn’t be taking this out on you. This is all my fault.” 
“It’s not you, alright? Not directly. Caitlyn likes to hurt when she’s hurt. I can handle her.” 
Vi chew on her lip, breaking through skin as blood comes to the surface, the iron taste coating her tongue. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You question Violet. 
“She knows she can’t lash out at the one thing she wants.” 
The one thing we both want, Vi thinks to herself. 
She takes the brunt of Caitlyn’s anger and she doesn’t even know why. Maybe an understanding but doesn’t know the full picture. You’re too much of a coward to let it slip. If everything goes south, the woman you adored could truly hate you and that’s the last thing you wanted. It’s silly to even hide a secret. Especially when you feel as if she sees right through your heart when her curious blue eyes look at you. 
“Trust me, I’m playing against what I want but she’s not as done as you think she is. She’ll come back for you, princess. You’re someone anyone would come back for. I’m the low totem pole trash found underneath her designer sole, there’s never been a place for me in her life.” 
“Don’t do that.” 
“It’s the truth.” 
“No, it isn’t. You’re more than how she treated you. Don’t talk about yourself like that. It’s the furthest thing from the truth.” 
Vi nods, tries to offer a smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. 
“What really happened? You look banged up and it looks more than just a rough practice. You know you can tell me anything. I’m all ears for you.” 
Vi struggles for a moment, and contemplates on telling you the truth. You deserve to know the truth and she knows that but she also can’t stand for Caitlyn to hurt another piece of you. This entire time apart from Caitlyn, you’ve done your best to separate and get over her. She can’t be the person to make you feel any worse about the situation. 
Caitlyn can’t get more in the way, she won’t allow it. 
“Kiramman just being a cunt, okay? It’s nothing I can’t handle.” 
“Okay but I’m cleaning that cut on your arm when we get home.” You nudge your shoulder against hers. Talking solace as she places her head in the crook of your neck. 
“Whatever you want, princess.” 
Then the question nags in the back of your mind, I saw her with Gert. But you’re putting her with Caitlyn. You think she’s cheating on you but there’s isn’t anything to cheat on. You’ve never spoken about that night in her pick-up truck but still dream of it. 
Luscious, greedy cunt taking her fingers in ease as you fucked her to completion. The whines she made, how harmonious they were with your own. The image stays imprinted on your mind, scorching the deepest depths of your mind for all eternity to see. 
But it’s not everyone taking a look. 
It’s just you. Keeping a lid on it has been more than you bargained for. Vi is the person who has been there to help you. When you’ve felt like the cards are stacked against you, it’s her that pulls you out. Every day after the breakup, if you could even call it that, you evidently were just a warm body to fuck for Caitlyn, Violet was there to make sure you were okay. 
The daily check-ins, making sure you were staying hydrated through all the tears, cooking dinner for the both of you when she knows you skipped lunch. It’s the little things you’re beating yourself up over and it makes you wonder what was really going on. 
If Caitlyn had taught you anything, it was people did fuck you because that’s the only thing they want. But you wanted Violet to be different. More than you ever had than Caitlyn, you need her to be more than what you’ve always been. 
“Are you alright, princess? Lost you there for a second.” 
You hope she never does. And you never want to lose her. You swallow your jealousy, you decide to trust, despite your best efforts; your heart remains unprotected. You chose blind trust, even if you know better, you lean into the faith. 
“Yeah, I’m here with you. Promise.” 
—
There’s red, pink, and white — everywhere. Mel is passionate about Valentine's day. In weeks of build up, this party is all she spoke of. Dragging you along to shop when buying decorations, but you didn’t mind. Sevika covering you at the bar means one less shift this week. After last night’s events, you could use the breather. 
If Sev wasn’t there, putting the men in place, the status of your safety would severely be in question. Vi came after you called, just complaining about it on your break, and thirty minutes later she sat on your section of the bar with one of her favorite books in hand. 
“You didn’t have to come. See? Still in one piece.” 
“Mhm and that’s how I want you to stay. Sorry princess, I’m not going anywhere.” 
It’s not like you needed any more reason to enjoy her company. You have too many. And they come to your mind as needy as a bee to honey. It’s why you bail on coming as a pair, you had a valid excuse, but you also knew if Mel knew why you were helping decorate their home she would literally kick you back to be with Violet. 
Hanging the banner in the entry was the last of your duties and before you knew it everyone was shuffling in one by one. The party is in full swing by the time Violet walks in the front door and you nearly collapse from just how damn good she looks. A bouquet of flowers, an assortment of pink and yellow roses with a few lilies meticulously placed in the arrangement. 
“I hope it’s not too much but I wanted to do something nice for you.” 
“They are beautiful, Violet. You really didn’t have to.” 
She smiles as she leans in to kiss your temple, “Of course I did.” 
The rest of the night goes off without a hitch, the games Mel has planned are fun. Everyone engages with each other and it is surprisingly pleasant. The only unsettling feeling stirring in the pit of your stomach is the ginger in the corner who has been eyeing you all night but the shirley temples you’ve been drinking all night has you dazed, sitting on Violet’s lap with her arms wrapped around your waist. 
Vi’s a bit inebriated as she plays with the hem of your dress, whispering how beautiful you look in your ear. You fidget in her hold, grinding against her even when you’re really not even meaning to. 
Astoundingly, the door slams, her arrival being announced. 
Uninvited and as prompt as ever. 
“Oh, so this—“ Caitlyn gestures to Vi as if she’s the sticky gum on the bottom of her overpriced sneaker, “my leftovers is why you chose to end things?” 
She’s charging as the ginger gets up from her seat, trying to hold Caitlyn back but she fails but in an instant, Vi stands up. Every protective bone in her body goes hyperactive, proving herself as a blockade between you and the devil herself. The smirk Vi wears makes Caitlyn violently scowl. She may be taller, but she’s smaller, thinner, not packing nearly as much muscle in her punch. 
There was nothing she would love more than to punch that stupid, coy fucking smile off her face. 
“What are you gonna do, cupcake?” She says the once endearing nickname, crathing to slither underneath her skin, she wants to piss her off to no end. Make Caitlyn regret ever fucking with either of you. It’s all this ever was, a game. Kiramman’s are always desperate to win, to annihilate your opponent. Any future moves made would be contingent in how she made you feel. 
“Get out of my way, Violet.” 
“Call me that again and I’ll knock your teeth out. And what are you going to do about it? Everyone may be afraid of you outside of the field, but in case you have forgotten, this isn't on campus where things are done the Kiramman way. If you wanna take a cheap shot at me, better make it count.” 
With a careful gaze, Caitlyn’s eyes beam down to the hand clinging to Vi’s bicep, how you’re looking at Vi and touching her skin and how dreadful you look to her. 
She directs her voice to you, “What? You’re gonna pick her over me? Like we mean nothing?” 
Bitterly, you laugh, but it isn’t funny. Not one bit. 
“It’s painful, isn’t it? Being on the other side of it.” Taking a step forward, leaning against Violet’s shoulder, intertwining your fingers together. “Those were your words exactly, Kiramman. This is nothing.” 
“I–” For the first time, right before your eyes, she’s stunned. For the first time since she’s met you, she’s speechless. 
“Caitlyn, we should just–” 
“Maddie, enough.” 
The both of you have done more than just rattle her, you’ve surprised her and Violet would be smiling so damn wide if Caitlyn still wasn’t in front of her. 
“Baby, can we talk about this? Just a minute of your time and we can sort this out.” Violet won’t stand for the desperate pleas for a moment longer. She takes a step forward, getting in Kiramman’s face, “I think you and your little orange muppet should get the fuck out before I throw you out myself.” 
“This isn’t any of your business, Vi.” 
“When you’re talking to my girl like that, it really fucking is.” 
My girl. 
Violet seems to be two seconds away from physically throwing her out when Mel finally interjects. “Caitlyn, you are unwelcome, uninvited, and you’re trespassing. I ask that you please leave before other extreme measures need to be taken.” 
A venomous scoff leaves her lips as Maddie drags her away, slamming the door on her way out. 
You're rattled, but not from Caitlyn, but from the assertiveness you didn’t know Vi possessed. The implications of this would serve consequences to not just Vi but to you but you couldn’t focus on that right now. She had called you her girl. 
Vi’s girl. 
“Well now that’s out of the way
” Mel jokes, lightening the mood as the party jumps back in full swing. But all you hear is Vi’s voice calling you hers and it’s like she knows what you’re thinking of when she spares a glance. 
“I’m sorry it just slipped but I couldn’t stand her looking at you like that. Like you were some piece of meat she can have whenever she wants.” Violet apologizes. Rubbing the back of your hand with your thumb, tracing her name into your skin. 
“It’s okay, um, it was actually really hot
” Immediately, she takes a step forward in an effort to be closer to you. “I-I’ve never really seen you be so uh–” 
“What princess?” Mischievously, she girls her head, biting her lip right before she licks them, her tongue piercing teasing you. 
“I dunno
it was just really hot seeing you like that
calling me that.” 
“My girl?” Vi smiles. It’s so genuine, making you swoon with a sincerity only she can give. 
“Yeah, something like that, maybe.” 
“I can call you a lot more things if you want. Wanna take a bet if they actually locked their bathroom?” 
Neither of you have ever moved so quickly in your life. Clothes get thrown on the tile the minute the two of you are alone, pressing your frame against the door as she decorates your neck in sovereign possession. She never wants anyone to question, you’re her girl. 
“Vi, do you,  fuccckkkk, really think this is a good idea?” She only grunts in reply as you're nearly fully exposed, your weeping cunt grinding against the muscular thigh she offers so graciously. Your friendship with her hangs in the balance, and you don’t want to think about that right now but you can’t help but have your doubts. 
“We can stop if you want to. Whatever you want.” Vi moves to remove her thigh until you whimper, tugging her closer by her pink hair towards you. 
“I didn’t say that. Please, don’t stop.” 
“Mhm, okay princess but only because you asked so nicely.” 
Vi pushes her against your pussy, your hips falling more erratic as Violet gets lost in your neck. Lips marking whatever inch of skin they can find as your folds get the needed friction from her trousers. Blindly sucking on the sweet spot behind your ear, making you putty in her hands. 
With a tight grip, you pull at her vibrant hair, her roots grounding you as the build in the pit of your stomach increases. But she pulls away just when you’re getting close. If your hands didn’t have the edge of the sink to hold onto, you’re not sure your legs would have supported you. 
“Did you want to stop?” 
“No.” Vi smirks. 
“Then why the hell did you?” 
She says nothing, infuriating you further. It almost pisses you off to the point where it’s painful. Vi keeps smirking at god knows what. Maybe she finds you just as pathetic as Caitlyn does. It may have been a distant future, when Caitlyn had actually been decent in her freshman year, her and Vi were the talk of the town until it all abruptly ended and no one knew why. You’ve never asked. 
Vi’s friendly with you but not to the point where she’s an open book. She’s hardly an open book with anyone, she’s careful when she hooks up with others. Especially with the who, she doesn’t want someone who's going to go off and tell the rest of campus how many fingers she used while she makes them come. 
But now, you like her. Really fucking badly. 
The way she snapped on her, protecting you, nearly connecting her fist with Caitlyn’s sharp jawline. It’s one of the reasons you’re in here with her. But still, not knowing the reason makes you feel slightly unsettled. 
There's been different rumors over the past few years surrounding Vi the sweetest girl around and Kirakiller. All of them painting Caitlyn in a god awful light. 
Kirakiller cheated on Vi. 
Vi left because Kirakiller didn’t want to make things official. 
Kirakiller‘s tenacious appetite for the bedroom couldn’t be satisfied by Vi. 
Kirakiller said Vi couldn’t make her come. 
The list goes on and on, and on. Neither of them were seen to be around each other again, not until Caitlyn seemed to catch you in her web. It was the sin of the century. Vi’s roommate seeing her ex-girlfriend. It was messy to say the least. A few long weeks and you cooking Vi her favorite meal, buying her favorite sour candy in bulk, along with some new gadget for her computer she’d been wanting. 
It’s all it took to forgive you. Her only request was to keep Caitlyn out of the apartment while she was here. She never spoke about her again and you never pressed the wound. If Vi didn’t ever want to talk about it but why they broke up gnawed at you. 
But Violet doesn’t seem to give a shit about that right now. 
“Get on your knees, princess.” 
You obliged as Vi took off the sweater, revealing a grey fitted tank-top, showing off just how fit she stayed in the crisp of winter. 
“Good girl. Now, take off my belt, yeah?” 
You released the belt from the latch, pulling it through the loop and handing it to Vi. Her firm grip grabs the belt, as she kneels behind you, bounding your wrists together by the smooth, cold leather. It’s black with a silver clasp, it feels nice against your wrists as she tightens it. As far as you can tell, it’s new and it makes you wonder if she bought it for just an occasion like this. 
Wrists bound behind your back, Vi slaps the fat of your ass before soothing over with delicate fingers, the calloused pads of her fingers playing with your puckered hole as she thumbs it gently. 
Pulling it back for a moment, collecting saliva in her warm mouth before drooling over your ass. Smothering her own spit, a place you’d never let anyone touch. You've convinced yourself all this time it’s because of your boundaries but when Vi did it, you didn’t have a problem with it. Then you realize you have trust with Vi, one you hadn’t had with anyone else. 
It was just a spur of the moment, two horny girls lonely and single, needing someone else but you also know Vi wasn’t one to sleep with half the campus. She’s a one-woman kind of girl. Maybe you need that trust. 
You’re hesitant, still but you can’t bring yourself to say no. She’s attentive, making sure you’re alright with each moment. Not wanting to push you past a limit both of you can’t come back from. 
“Is this alright?” Vi whispers into your ear as if she can read your mind. 
“Yeah, it’s good.” You take a beat before moaning as you lean into her chest, “A little too good.” 
Vi chuckles into your ear, the vibrations tingle throughout your body. Suddenly your mind is wondering how a simple giggle can make you feel so soaked. With a gentle hand, her thumb keeps on playing with your ass as she maneuvers you into her lap and that’s when you feel it. 
A faux cock. 
“Is that a—” You want to ask but for the first time in your life, you feel shy. 
“A cock?” 
“Someone’s cocky.” 
You both giggle at your innuendo. 
Lightly, with soaked fingers she pulls out of your lips, she rims your puckered hole, a coveted limit in your body but with her, you so freely wish to give it. 
The eye contact feels awfully intimate but you can’t bring yourself to tear yourself away. It’s entirely new to you. Caitlyn never liked to look you in the eyes when she fucked you. Always something to hide, how she truly feels about you is privy to anyone else but her. 
You didn’t have the right to know. 
With Vi, everything becomes so clear. 
It’s crystal clear when she asks if she can slide a finger inside your ass, it’s overly intimate when you tell her yes as your eyes never leave hers. Her eyes are as hooded as you’ve ever seen them but she won’t break eye contact. Not for a second. You’re questioning if she’s even blinking. 
With each passing second, her pink hair surrounds you as her forehead pressed against yours, blue eyes open as she asks again if you’re okay with it. You give her another yes before her middle finger slides in your mouth, your tongue circling the digit before sucking on it dramatically. Letting off with a pop, Vi teases your forbidden hole one more time before she gently coaxes you open for her. 
“Shit, Shit, that’s—” You squint your eyes shut. The new sensation is a little too much for your brain to process much less the fluttering pressure in the pit of your stomach. 
“Look at me, princess. Keep your eyes on me, alright?” Vi lightly commands, her tone as sweet as you’ve ever heard it. 
With the sweet words thrown your way, your eyes flutter open, long eyelashes kissing your brow bone. Vi smiles softly, her top lip lifting as she sees the way you’re looking at her. 
Kirakiller is so fucking stupid, Vi thinks to herself be she keeps the words to herself. 
Vi stretches you more as her entire finger sits within you, waiting for you to be ready for more and when you are, she nearly comes herself. You’re louder than anyone she’s ever been with. She’s thankful for the loud music Mel insisted on, some shitty pop tune drowning out the two of you. Violet’s never been so thankful. 
Those shitty pop tunes are drowning the especially deafening screams of Vi’s name until your vocal chords are shot. With a strong wrist and the flick of her wrist, she can tell you’re already close. 
“Fuck, I’m sorry, I’ve never done this before.” Shining eyes are glossy as ever as you struggle to keep them open and focused on her. “Never felt this, shiiiittttt, Vi, please. I’m so close.” 
“What do you mean? Has no one ever fucked your ass? You’ve been sleeping with Kiramman. How have you not—” 
“Never let her.” That sends Vi’s clit throbbing viciously. 
“Kirakiller’s an ass lover, everyone knows that.” 
“Are we gonna sit her talking about her the entire time or are you gonna make me come?” Agitating you roll your eyes but Vi licks her lips slowly as a distraction, pulling your attention to her pierced tongue and then you feel another finger stretch at your ass. 
“What did you say, princess? Something about coming?” Vi uses another finger, her long digits spreading the slit in your lower lips, making a mess as she spreads the pre-cum spilling out of you. “Be a good girl won’t you?” Vi pinches your clit and just like that your eyes shut again, a completely shattering orgasm washed over you. 
Body twitching as Vi keeps you in her hold with a strong grip, your body riding against her fingers but she isn’t too pleased for a moment as she tuts. 
“What did I say princess? Eyes open, now.” You struggle, again, but you’re able to meet her demand. There’s an urge to look away, to hide in Vi’s pink hair, her tattooed neck, but you do none of it. Dangerous eyes look at yours as she fucks you through it. You wanted to tug at her hair, pull her closer to you, but hands are bound so all you can do is take it, with loud moans being released, ones you’re trying to control but utterly fail to do so. 
“So pretty like this, yeah? God, those gorgeous eyes of yours are gonna get me in trouble. Crying for me like that, makes me wanna take you back to our home and fuck you on my bed, baby. You’re such a beautiful girl and deserve to be treated like one, my sweet girl.” 
Vi isn’t sure if you’re crying from the intimacy or from the orgasm, probably both. It’s not a secret since the start of the semester you’d been with Kiramman but Vi knew first hand what that meant. There’s no eye contact, no cuddling, no reassurances, it’s just sex. When Vi was going through it herself, she could see the toll it even took on Caitlyn but she didn't break. Her resolve is rock solid and Vi had learned it the hard way, just as she supposed you did. 
It was an endless cycle and it seems Kiramman continued it again with you. It’s evil the way she pulls you apart, makes each part of you feel special, like you’re her entire world and there’s no one else but there always is someone else. Always. Kiramman will lie through her perfectly aligned teeth but there is always someone she keeps for a backup. 
Vi wipes away your tears as she soothes you with soft whispers and delicate hands running up and down your back. It feels like the easiest thing she’s done, soothing you into serenity. With gentle care, she takes the belt off of your wrists, rubbing soft circles over the sensitive skin as you come back to yourself. The alcohol feels like a memory. Her kindness makes your head spin and your heart flutter. 
Now, you understand why the two of them never worked. 
Vi is everything Caitlyn struggles to be. 
It’s like looking in a mirror of everything you want to be but knowing you’ll never be her. The imperfection of Caitlyn’s kindness and the overabundance of Vi’s is probably too much of a bruise to her ego. One could see how much it would eat her alive. Vi helps you relocate your clothes that are scattered across the bathroom floor. Shamelessly, she watches as you dress yourself again, not one to look away from the woman she had screaming her name not even five minutes prior. 
“You’re so beautiful, can’t keep my eyes off you.” 
“C’mon Violet. We live together, I’m the same ole’ me. Now, you’ve just fucked my ass.” You try to brush off the compliment. You feel more similar to Caitlyn then you’d like to admit. Vi’s wholeheartedness is overwhelming, leaving a sting of longing every time she looks at you with a light in her curious eyes. 
You slip on your dress and Vi is quick to zip you up but not without kissing the nape of your neck. 
Tonight’s actions suddenly feel very sobering. 
Vi isn’t done with you as she lifts you up on the countertop, finding her sweatshirt before she covers her toned figure again. You’re wondering what she’s playing at. What she’s thinking about. Vi finds your heels, the versace platform heels Caitlyn had gifted you for your birthday a week after the fact. A pity gift. Similar to herself, you couldn’t say no, it was just too pretty. 
They’re too expensive to come from a broke college student. Vi knows where they came from but she exercises that tight lip of hers. 
With a gentle tap, she taps your calf lightly a couple times and you offer your leg to her as she slaps the heel back onto your feet, clasping the strap around your ankle before she does the same for the other. The both of you stare at the lingering hands on your thighs, rubbing soft circles into the skin, the bluntness of her fingernail causes goosebumps to spread across the skin. 
Caitlyn is terrified of this, something so soft and fragile, her grip would be too tight; she’d break you in the process. She’s a chapter you want to close. All you want now is the woman in front of you. 
Vi has only ever been just a friend and she treats you like this. An imaginative mind, one of your own making, starts to wonder
if Vi was in love with Caitlyn, was she even sweeter to her? If her golden heart wasn’t enough for Caitlyn, whose would it be? 
The question makes you lost on the idea. Maybe it’s the post-nut clarity of being fucked like you just were, but you see Vi an entirely new light. One that feels as blinding as the sun but she’s smothering you with a perfect amount of warmth. 
“So
that happened.” Lightly, Vi laughs trying to brush off the seriousness of the moment. 
“Yeah and it seems you came packing.” 
Mel has been talking her up all week, telling her she wasn’t just seeing things, all she had to do was give you space and you would come to her slowly. It seems like Mel hadn’t been totally wrong. You are clearly attracted to her but the more protective side of her mind wonders if this is all that it extends to — sex. 
The flashback of Caitlyn and all her little twisted games comes to mind while your curious eyes inspect her intensely. 
“It’s just a stroke of optimism.” Vi tries to control her breathing when you close your legs around her waist, crossing your legs over the other as you lock her into a secure position. 
The tight dress you’re wearing bunches up again, almost resting on your hips. 
“I think you were wanting to stroke something else.” 
“Uh. No. I was, definitely
okay
maybe I was. A little bit.” Vi admits as you continue to play with her hair, your heel lightly grazing her bum as you tease her for just a little bit longer. 
“It’s cute. I like it when you’re confident. You packed a cock in your pants because you wanted to fucked me tonight. Be proud about it. Yeah, maybe you didn’t get to use it but you sure did fuck me.” 
“How do you do that?” 
“Do what?” 
“You’re so brave. Nothing stands in your way, when you want something you go after it. I could never do that.” 
“Well, you kinda did. Unless, um—” But the words die in your throat. Suddenly they seem too real and if you tell her, this whole charade will be over, reality will set in and this magical night will only be reduced to primal, drunken needs. 
For all you know, Vi didn’t mean any of this. Maybe you just wanted to get your pussy wet, wanted to fuck a pretty girl, needed to see some tits to get her through this lonely holiday. The one that patronizes the single. 
Maybe that’s all this is. You’re just a nice piece of ass to fuck. It makes you feel dirty, the air feels thinner, and before you know it Vi’s whispering in your ear to take deep breaths. 
“Princess, I’m right here, alright. Just breathe and tell me. It’s alright. I’m not going to hurt you.” 
“I-I just thought because you know, well, after the last month I thought I was more than just
” 
“A girl I wanna fuck?” 
“Yeah.” 
“Well, you are. Would that be such a bad thing? I know with Caitlyn you had something casual, and maybe you liked things that way, but I want something more serious. I don't want to play with your feelings and I don’t want you to play mine. If this is what you want then I think it’d be worth a shot but if not, we can just be friends, alright? There’s no pressure.” 
“But Natalie
you said she wanted something serious and you didn’t.” 
“I lied to you and I’m sorry for that. But I wanted something serious, just not with her.” 
“You know what you want.” You stated it more like a question, puzzled and perplexed about a woman, for the first time, saying exactly what she’s looking for. 
“Well
yeah? I respect you enough not to waste your time.” Her eyes gleam, expectant and waiting for you to answer. 
“I’ve never had someone so honest with me. I kinda don’t know what to do with it.” 
The most sincere eyes look into yours, as she leans into your fingers that play with her vibrant, violet hair. It’s all so fast but Vi nurtures everything once broken within you until you’re healthy once again, restoring the strength you once felt before your heart stopped listening to your head. 
It’s a warm, comforting feeling you want to sink into. She’s the closest you’ve had to a semblance of hope. You wondered how anyone could ever let go of her. It wasn’t that she had just given you the best orgasm of your life, it was more than that. Vi made you feel more in thirty minutes than Caitlyn had in your entire time together. 
There wasn’t a worry in the back of your mind if this mattered, if you mattered. Her eyes were so open, letting you into the love dripped like honey, full of sweetness, every empty jar of yours waiting to be filled. 
“Don’t do anything right now then. For now,” Vi leaned forward, her lips ghosting yours. Close enough where her breath could be felt on yours. “I don’t know where you’re at but I’ve never felt like this, about anyone, and if you wanna start slow we can. Although, we have twice now so I don’t know how slow we can actually go, or we could even go on real date and then you can decide but—”
“Violet?” 
“Yeah?” 
“You talk too much.” 
You lean in and Vi doesn’t waste the opportunity, capturing your top lip between hers, wanting nothing more than to get lost in every inch of you. Holding you like a delicate flower she’s afraid to crumple in her hands, Vi lets herself get lost in this. 
For once she doesn’t think of the consequences, if this is moving too fast, wondering what Caitlyn would do if she knew and who she would actually be jealous of. It’s a slippery slope, you messing with her, Vi messing with you. 
But she desperately wants it to be more than your roommate, more than a friend — more than secret meeting where Vi fucks you senseless. She can’t get into this and for it to mean nothing and she’s terrified Caitlyn already has her claws dung in deep to you. Then there’s a moan of Vi’s name being said, and her greedy tongue slips in your mouth as she aches for more of you. 
Strong arms wrap around your waist, pulling your frame impossibly close to her, commanding your mouth with her pierced tongue as if she was born for it, the coolness of the stainless steel ball tangled with your tongue is a high you want to chase. With every touch, a shiver runs up her spine, like there’s a live wire exposed within you and only her touch can spark it alive. 
Vi knows where you want to be touched before you say a word, like she has a connection to your mechanisms, every craving designed for her to carry out as if she’s the one who put them there in the first place. Violet’s pelvis presses against yours, as she gives you the kiss of your life, it leaves you breathless as you chase her lips, your grip pulling at her roots as if it’s your sole purpose in life. 
The rest of the world melts away and it’s just the two of you. The lingering shadow of your ex fades into the background and all you see is Violet. Right under your nose this entire time and only now do you realize just how wonderfully perfect she is. 
Violet ravishes in how good it feels to be chosen and it’s by you. 
The angel who can fly all on her own now; wings no longer clipped by the devil herself. 
Fin. 
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haziells · 6 months ago
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my way
until it reaches the void state
(this will be a long post)
1. the end, the beginning.
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I knew about the law of attraction years ago thanks to social media, so there it was, like every day trying to manifest my desires.
I was fed up, every day was the same.
My heart healing and breaking everyday, the same cycle of hope and hopelessness continues.
was it always going to be like this?
would I always have to let fears take over me?
I couldn't trust, I didn't believe that just by believing I could get what I wanted but at the same time I had no other option.
I couldn't go on like this, I didn't want to go on like this, I just wanted to end my life, I gave up and cried, cried, cried thinking that this would be the end, that I wouldn't be able to be happy and that was it.
I gave up and thought I was resigned to living a shitty life.
But I cried so much that all the sadness that was in me came out, all the fears that were clinging to me came out.
That's when I felt peace, when I realized that no, I wasn't going to give up that easily, that I first have to do it and do it well, not keep trying.
So I persisted for only 2 days, as I already had my desire for that moment and yes, after 2 days my 3D had already reflected it, it was exciting.
did i reallt do that? was it just a coincidence?
No, it was really me.
I was happy for a few days until the fears returned but this time I was afraid of losing my desire, that's when I realized that fears have no meaning.
I already have it, why would I lose it?
2. I discovered Tumblr and the void state.
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I didn't know what void state was, but as soon as I read about it, it caught my attention.
By then my self-concept had improved, I was still dealing with my fears but not as much as before.
So, I made a friend who explained to me more about the void state and she told me that she manifested her house through the void state.
I got excited and hopeful, I read some methods on how to get in and tried to do it, but I couldn't.
I couldn't do it, the simple idea of getting everything so easily sounded easy and fantastical to me.
But one day I realized who I really am, that I am everything, that nothing and no one has power outside of me.
I was filled with satisfaction, joy, peace, I felt like laughing knowing who I am and how easy everything is.
How did I first enter the void state?
so I had a subliminal audio playing in the background while I was meditating.
I thought...I am so powerful, I am capable of anything, I can have whatever I want whenever I want.
At that time I was very sleepy because I had taken some exams, so I just thought "my physical body is going to sleep and rest and I'm going to the void state"
After all, the void state is me and there is nothing easier than being me.
And so it happened, I entered the void state and knew that I already had everything just as I wanted, then I came out and continued sleeping while I didn't stop smiling and feeling a sensation of peace and extreme happiness.
I woke up and stood calmly until I realized what had happened...
I was scared shitless when I realized that I had entered the void state for real and that at that moment I should have everything I wanted and that was when 3d reality disappeared before my eyes.
Everything began to collapse and I felt a huge current of energy running through my entire body, as if it were a waterfall flowing inside me.
I was very scared, I won't deny it, but after all I did it.
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(I swear that just as you see in the gif, that's how I felt at that moment)
The following days I couldn't stop shaking and feeling scared because I didn't understand how it was possible that 3D could disappear just like that.
Then I read someone here talking about non-dualism. @lotusmi
Then I understood my experience.
Since that day everything is much easier for me.
I have entered the void state 3 times.
that manifests?
.cure my depression.
.cure my anxiety.
.trust myself.
.longer eyelashes.
.money.
.be able to manifest easily.
.prettiest voice.
.I am spoiled.
The rest of the things I manifest are more private.
But basically for me this is the best thing that could have happened to me.
I will mention who were the bloggers that I read to understand more about the void state and about who I really am.
@gorgeouslypink
@lotusmi
@beesfairlyland
I will also mention a blogger whose information I also like and I find it cute.
@sugarplumfairy777
If you want to know more, you can send me a direct message, no problem.
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ittybittyfanblog · 7 months ago
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Error 404: (Self-Aware!AU, Sylus Edition) – Pt. 9
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Summary: A LADS self-aware!AU featuring Sylus and a player. That’s it, that’s the plot. Tags: player!reader x sylus, fem!reader x sylus, reader x lads, self-aware!au, strong language, angst, depictions of a depressive episode, it’s pretty heavy, don’t force yourself to read if ur not in the right headspace pls, ambiguous ending (?) A/N: Yeah, I’m sorry.  (Ngl, this chapter kinda stumped me—it’s gone through a whooole lot of editing/revisions đŸ˜”đŸ€™đŸŒ I don’t want to overthink it too much at this point, but I hope it hits the way it should lol. Blame Moby if it doesn’t.)
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Pt. 1 - Pt. 2 - Pt. 3 - Pt. 4 - Pt. 5 - Pt. 6 - Pt. 7 - Pt. 8 - Pt. 9 - Pt. 10 - Epilogue
"I thought that you were so beautiful, it was love, I guess And you might never come back home, and I may never sleep at night But God, I just hope you're doing fine out there, I just pray that you're alright And I feel so alone, and I feel so alone out here.” – A House In Nebraska, Ethel Cain
 
The television drones uninterrupted in the background; a mockumentary type featuring a ragtag ensemble of vampires stuck in some sort of modern day hell, their loud misadventures casting fractured lights across the four walls of your apartment. 
You sit there, watching the screen, your gaze unfocused. Nothing registers. The remote lies limp in your hand as a stupid sitcom laugh track fills the room—shrill, hollow. Mocking. Like a bad punchline to a joke you’re not in on. 
Your phone buzzes on the coffee table, cutting through the noise, the sudden glow in your periphery pulling you out of a pensive daydream. 
For a split second, your chest constricts—a reflex carved by habit, something you’re still working to shake off. 
You avert your eyes, torn between the urge to look away and the desire to keep your gaze on it forever.
The screen fades to black. 
A clean break, you reason. Something to spare you both the inevitable heartache waiting at the end of this
 hopeless affair. Less mess. Fewer complications. 
A poor attempt to keep the pain from dragging out longer than it has to. Just a quiet ending. 
(Or, at least, it’s what you tell yourself.)
The same mantra plays on loop in your mind as you're swept away by the motions of the days that follow. Life blurs into a repetitious cycle of work, sleep, and chores—an unbearable combination of feigned ignorance and self-abnegation, in the guise of being caught up with it all.
You aren’t fooling anyone, of course.
The hours toll on, slipping into uncertainty. What started off that way stretches into days, and before you know it, nearly a week has passed, leaving you adrift. None the wiser to the meaningless, relentless march of time.
The pinging of your phone grows more sporadic as it lights up with every message that you stubbornly refuse to acknowledge. It’s not as if you don’t feel it—the pull, the weight of every vibration, like a stone lodged in your gut. Like the sting of a thousand cuts. 
And as you fall back into the familiar patterns of neglect
 It carries with it an odd sense of defeat. Predictable, really.
-
-
-

 You cave on the fifth day. 
The barrage of texts hits you like a gale-force wind, tearing through the fragile layer of detachment you’ve worn over like a second skin.
How was your day, poppet?
Theres a gemstone at this auction that reminds me of your eyes.
[Image attachment] 
Beautiful—but it pales in comparison to yours. 
Luke and Kieran are wondering whats got me distracted lately. Ease their worries.
Answer me, sweetheart.
You dont need to ignore me. 
If you need space– if we need to establish some boundaries, all you have to do is say the word. 
Dont shut me out. 
Please.  
Your eyes prickle as they gloss over the messages, the words seeming to bend under the weight of your silence, each one unraveling like loose threads on the sleeve of your favorite cardigan, falling apart at the seams. 
Gradually, they turn into something less demanding. More
 defeated.
I miss you, little dove.
You read the texts over and over until the letters have lost their meaning, and all that’s left is the aching longingness behind them. 
You set your phone down.
_
The vibrations grow less frequent, like a heartbeat slowing, fading—until one afternoon, it just
 stops. 
The void he leaves behind seeps into the empty spaces, bleeding into every shadowed corner and untouched surface where his voice, his presence—louder than life, brighter than anything you’ve ever fucking known and had the pleasure of knowing—once lingered. 
The absence is almost physical; you feel it like a phantom limb. 
Most days, you find yourself in a daze, staring blankly at nothing. The numbness spreads like tendrils—invasive as they sink into your bones, dragging you deeper into despair, turning every bridge crossed to ash, every inkling of joy to dust.
The quiet flames of apathy consume silently. It strips away everything, leaving behind a cavernous pit of utter emptiness. A wasteland, devoid of feeling. 
Loneliness doesn’t scream. It doesn’t lash out. 
It simply welcomes you, like an old friend, the deeper you sink into it.
––––
Sylus tries to respect your space. 
That’s what he’s here for after all, isn’t it? His reason for existence—to be whatever you need him to be. A confidant, a distraction, a steady presence in your life. It’s what he’s made for. To be there when you need him, to exist between the vacant spaces, and only then. 
The thought gnaws at him, a ravenous fiend that chips away at the calm facade he’s finding more and more difficult to uphold, leaving something vicious in the wake of a growing bitterness he can no longer suppress.
Time seems to slip past differently now. It drifts, shapeless and infinite, heavier with the burden of your absence. Each moment without you feels like an eclipse—darkening the edges of this damned world, casting longer shadows through the crevices where he once basked beneath your fragile light, your warmth that seemed to fill every corner of his existence.
 He craved it—craves it. Now you leave him stranded in this cursed dusk, everything cold and dim in the wake of your abandonment, forever waiting for the moment his sun would once again break through the hollow grey.
Sylus thinks he’s losing a part of himself with every call unanswered, every message left unread. It’s subtle; like colors fading from an old film roll. 
(Is this what it feels like to be nothing more than a script in a code? He never truly understood what it meant to be less alive, less human. Until now.)
Solitude isn’t new to him. This world, built for him, is inherently lonely by design. But this
 this is different. It’s the kind of emptiness that festers, sharper than any wound he’s endured in this senseless simulation. It twists inside him like a blade, a cruel, unrelenting reminder of what he’s denied.
Of what he can never truly be.
He can wait a little longer. Even if the silence presses harder with each passing moment, even as the edges of his reality begin to blur into something unrecognizable without you in it. Sylus can remain in this void a little longer, clinging to the fragments of you that still linger—your voice echoing softly in his memory, your laughter faint but still alive in the spaces where you used to be.
He can. He will. 
––––
“Hey, you okay?” 
You pull your attention back to Khol, who’s now watching you with concern in their eyes.
You force a smile, shaking your head. “Yeah– yeah, sorry. Just
 a lot on my mind.” 
They don’t look convinced. “Seriously. You know you can talk to me, right?” 
Anytime, darling. 
I mean it. 
You blink the memory away before it can turn into tears. 
“Yeah, ‘course,” you answer lightly, clearing your throat. “So, what’s been going on with you and Anna?” 
––––
You stand in front of the junk food aisle, a mountain of Nissin Ramen boxes stacked high, advertised by a large sign: Buy 3, Get 1 FREE!
The fluorescent lights buzz overhead, flickering erratically, and the dull noise of the grocery mart hums incessantly in your ears. You don’t think twice before grabbing one of the worn cartons, tossing three more into your (nearly) empty shopping cart. Might as well.
The plastic bags dig into your palms as you lug three in one hand, a larger box tucked under your other arm, leaving the store. 
The trip back home is a quiet affair. You almost expect admonishment; pinging sounds ricocheting in the silence to reprimand you for your poor life choices. You wait for it with bated breath. 
Your phone remains uncharacteristically silent. 
-
-
-
Back home, you pour boiling water on the styrofoam cup for dinner. The artificial broth leaves a bad taste in your mouth. 
You choke down a few bites before dumping the rest of it down the drain. 
The sound of steel hitting the sink feels louder than it should.
––––
The city thrums loudly beyond your window, restless and impersonal. From the sixth floor of this dilapidated building you loosely call home, you watch the skyline stretch into the night, dotted lights glimmering in distant technicolor. 
Hours from now, sunlight will spill through the curtains, bathing everything in a warm, golden ochre. But for now, just a quarter past midnight, you’re but a voyeur of the world outside. In exhaust fumes and all its muted neon glory.
Those lights promised you everything, once—a fresh start, the kind of freedom you used to dream of when home felt too small, too restrictive for a runaway kid desperate to break free from the shackles of a dying town. Each glow was like a beacon, an irresistible call to escape, and you ran toward it without looking back. 
Somewhere along the way, as life sapped you with the weight of its reality, the novelty fizzled from a blinding explosion down to a waning ember. The lights became another illusion, your precious city just another cage. The first cracks in the rose-colored glasses you’d worn so blindly. You can’t exactly pinpoint when, only that the colors you thought were once too bright now seem dimmer and farther out of reach.
You think you’ll miss the noise the most. 
The cursor blinks on the search bar, a steady metronome marking time in rhythm with the hollow ache in your chest. Flight schedules fill the page, each option blurs together into a single choice you can’t quite push yourself to make. 
You skim through the list: there’s one at dawn, another at around twelve noon, a red-eye flight you probably could catch if you leave in thirty minutes. 
You stare at the numbers, a finger hovering over the Book Now button. 
The details don’t matter. ‘Home’ still feels small, suffocating, but at least it’s a kind of emptiness you know. Here, the void sprawls wide, endless, leaving you unmoored with no tether to pull you back.

 The dichotomy between the two choices, you think, is meaningless. 
What was once home and the city will keep on moving—with or without you. It doesn’t matter where you end up. Neither place will give you what you’re looking for.
The laptop screen dims into a faint glare. The sound of your breathing echoes too loud in the stillness, the empty space seeming to shrink around you, caving in on the weight of your indecision. 
And as you sit there, swallowed by the dark, you can’t help but wonder if you’ve been drifting for far longer than you realized. 
If maybe there’s nowhere you were meant to belong at all.
––––
It’s not until one quiet night, with nothing but a bottle of merlot and a slight buzz, that you buckle under pressure.
You hesitate, thumb hovering over the icon, as if time has slowed to a crawl. Your chest tightens, unease twisting inside you at the thought of what you’re about to do. Anticipation hangs over you, insistent, smothering everything else until it’s just the room and the cacophony of thoughts in your head, all centered on one thing. 
One person.
With a shaky exhale, you finally open the game.
He’s there. Of course, he’s there. Waiting, like he always does. 
The loading screen fades away, and Sylus appears, a myriad of expressions passing by his face too fast to catch. There’s surprise, yes, along with
 elation? Hope? 
Then a flicker of something
 vitriolic.
It’s fleeting; masked quickly until you can only catch the faintest trace of pique simmering just behind a veneer of indifference.
"Finally, she remembers me," Sylus mocks coolly, almost appearing unaffected. You know better—intimately familiar with all the microexpressions on his face. The subtle tick in his jaw, the incensed look in his eyes
 each one betrays what he truly feels, hidden underneath the deceptive calm.  
The seconds drag on, stretching into an uncomfortable silence. Your heart hammers loudly, audible in this quiet, but your mouth remains dry; the words stuck somewhere deep in your throat. You’re terrified that, once you speak, you’ll shatter this moment. Aggravate the strain forged by your self-imposed absence all the more.
You don’t really know what to say. You haven’t– you haven’t actually thought this far. 
So you just
 stare at him longer than you should. Long enough that it charges the air with a tension so thick, you could almost feel the weight of it against your skin. 
It’s awkward. Excruciating.
With difficulty, you tear your gaze away from his withering glare. That’s when you notice it—the different icons dotted in red. 
You hesitate for a second longer, then tap on them one by one.
The flood of gifts bewilders you, the sheer volume of it all almost unbelievable. Ascension materials, stamina supplies, both red and purple crystals piling up to an impossible number
 each pushing past the million mark. 
And unread mail. So much unread mail. 
Guilt settles deep in your gut, creeping past your lungs enough to suffocate you. 
It’s not the gifts. Not the why, or when. It’s the weight of how much he’s been waiting, how much he’s given—how much he's missed you. 
The cold realization that he’s been here, silently counting the days until your return, strikes you like a fist to the face.
–
He tempers the sting of your sudden reappearance, swallows it down like a bitter draught. The feelings he has inside of him are tumultuous at best. Volatile at worst. To be cast aside so easily, so carelessly
 it burns at him. Resentment thrums in his veins like a virulent river, threatening to ruin the fragility of the moment. He fights to suppress it, push the desire back before it can consume him, before it can manifest into being. 
If he lets it go untethered, this
 hunger for retaliation—to make you feel even a fraction of the agony you’ve inflicted, whether unknowingly or deliberately—it will destroy the delicate respite you’ve allowed him. The only reprieve he’s had since you left.
But the edges of his self-control fray, unraveling strand by strand.
“You’ve been busy,” you say, finally; your voice trembling, barely above a whisper.
Sylus hones in on the words. Something in him snaps. 
“You left me plenty of time to be.” His response is quick, cutting, but when his gaze locks with yours, the fiery vermillion melts into a more molten red. 
It’s the first glimpse of softness beneath his cruel vitriol, until he continues: 
“Did you get lonely?”
The words hang in the air, searing and merciless. A barb meant to wound. And it does.
You flinch, and for a fleeting moment, Sylus feels a wicked satisfaction from the honest look of hurt on your face. To know that you’re not immune to the same ache that’s hollowed him out, emptied him from the inside, is intoxicating. 
But the triumph is short-lived, snuffed out as quickly as it comes.
Shame crashes over him like a wave, dragging him under the tide of his actions. What kind of man takes pleasure in this? In hurting you? 
The bitterness turns inward, coiling around his heart like a vice. His fingers twitch at his sides, aching to reach out. But as always, the damn screen is there—unyielding, impenetrable. A barrier he can never break. 
It frustrates him to no end; the bane of his very existence.
And then, in the smallest, softest voice, you say it.
“I missed you.”
The words are feeble, paper-thin, but the admission pierce through him all the same. The stoic facade cracks; the sharpness in his gaze dulls.
You see it—the way his lips part to respond, only to falter halfway. The way his brows pull together, the way his eyes fall shut as if he can’t stand to be in this situation with you. 
You’re afraid of what’ll come next. 
He sees it, too—the stiffness in your shoulders, the way you shrink into yourself, bracing for a blow that’ll never come. You’re standing there, like someone on death row, resigned to whatever punishment you think he’s about to dish out. Resigned to the contempt you believe yourself to be deserving of.
The sight guts him. 
Sylus loathes to think he’s the reason for this. For being the one who’s made you stand there, small and trembling, as though his words or actions could destroy you. 
As if he’d allow such a thing.  
The guilt rises in him, and it leaves an acrid taste on his tongue.

 
And just like that, he concedes. 
The anguish he’s carried in the days you’ve left him by his lonesome—all of it falls away. It only takes a single glance at you, his little love in pain, and he’s stripped bare. He almost laughs at the absurdity of it all; the ease with which he surrenders to you, this time no different than any other. 
Do you have any idea how much power you wield over him? He’d give you everything—his pride, his pain, his heart—if you asked. Serve it on a silver platter, even. 
And he’d do so willingly. Without question. Without hesitation. 
He wouldn’t have it any other way. 
Sylus steps closer to the screen, the constant reminder of the vast gulf that separates the two of you. “Talk, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his voice softer now—resigned. “I’ve missed your voice.”
You hesitate to meet his eyes. “It’s not as if you don’t have other ways to hear me.”
His mouth twitches, a shadow of a smile ghosting his lips. “True,” he admits, his tone wry and tinged with something vulnerable. “But it’s been so long since you chose to talk to me.” He exhales a drawn-out breath. “No matter. You’re here now.”
You swallow the lump on your throat, willing your tears at bay. “I am.” You give him an almost-genuine smile as you offer, “Would you like to do a round of Kitty Cards?” 
“Of course.” Whatever you want. 
And so it goes. You and Sylus spend the night locked in a familiar rhythm, cycling through rounds after rounds of the silly card game until your laughter spills like an addicting sound bite, one that Sylus has missed hearing.
When you got tired, the two of you moved on to the claw machines, proverbially emptying out the whole arcade. Plushies of all kinds piled in his arms, a little crow even perched on top of his head. 
The sight makes you giggle, and your giggle thaws the ice around his heart. 
It almost feels like nothing’s changed. The easy banter, the steady stream of jokes and teasing, flows as effortlessly as it once did. Like two puzzle pieces clicking into place, filling in the empty gaps of the previous days. It’s comforting, like a balm to an open wound. 
You play with a certain zeal that catches Sylus off guard—there’s a joy in you that both thrills and stirs an undercurrent of unease in him. 
After what feels like hours of playing, exhausting all what you can do, or at least, what this damned game could offer as much, you two find yourself just staring at each other. 
Two worlds, impossibly close yet painfully far. The quiet doesn’t quite settle as naturally as it once did, but neither of you seems to mind. Craved it, in fact. 
You’re beautiful, Sylus thinks as he stares at the soft planes of your face, drinking you in like a man parched. 
“My lo—” 
“I’m deleting the game, Sy.” 
And it’s as if time has staggered to a halt. 
Sylus wants to believe he’s misheard you, that his mind is playing tricks on him. He wouldn’t be surprised if his hearing’s not what it used to be.
But the words sink into him, inexorable and catastrophic. The realization that this was bound to happen is clear in hindsight—like watching a glass slip from your hand, the shatter already written in the fall. He sees it coming, yet it still feels worse than anything he’s imagined.
He stands there, unnaturally still, as if rooted in place. The lightness he’s felt for the past few hours of reuniting with you vanishes in an instant. It’s as if the world itself has been drained of color, leaving only the stark reality of what you’ve just said.
Then Sylus breathes out a laugh. It’s short and jagged, devoid of any humor. “Oh, so it’s been leading up to this, has it?” 
“I–” you swallow hard, bottom lip trembling. “I made the goddamn mistake of falling for someone that's impossible to have—and it’s killing me, Sylus.” Your voice fractures under the weight of frustration. The words feel like shards of glass tearing their way out of your throat. “I–I can’t do this anymore.”  
“Just you, then.” Sylus sneers, tone acerbic. “And have you stopped to consider my feelings in this matter?” 
“How can you still want this?” you bite back, voice cracking. “How can you want me—to bet on something that’s doomed right from the start?”
His expression shifts, and for a brief moment, pain flickers in his eyes, raw and unguarded. He doesn’t bother hiding it.
He doesn’t answer your question. Instead, when he speaks again, his words send an icy shiver down your spine.
“You delete the game, and I will cease to exist.”
You freeze. The weight of the statement hangs in the air like a guillotine. 
A shallow, shaky breath escapes you.
“You won’t,” you assert, brows furrowing, as if trying to convince yourself of it too. “You’ll still have a life there. With her. The way things have always been.” There’s a pause before you utter the final blow: “The way it should be.”
“You’d condemn me to this life,” he says, voice hollow, before it turns venomous. “Knowing what I know now?”
With your heart in your throat, you clench your hands into fist. “You–you said we’re just made of what we’re given, didn’t you? That each of us has our own set of scripts, just
” you falter, struggling to articulate what you want to say.
“And you think that’s all I am?” he interjects, his voice dropping to a harsh whisper as he cuts you off. “Simply a mere code in a complex string of binary, incapable of making my own choices? Undeserving of it?”
“Of course not!” you snap angrily. 
“Yet here you are,” he says, a quiet intensity lacing his words. “Making the decision for me.”
Your breath hitches, the will to argue dissipating like smoke. 
“You tell me I have a soul,” he states. “Do you truly believe I’m bereft of a heart?”
No. No, how can he say that—
Before you can form a response—to defend yourself, to explain, to take it back—he continues, leaving no room for interruption. 
“Is this what you really want?” Sylus intones, tone detached, as if he’s merely commenting on something as trite as the weather. “If you can look me in the eye and tell me yes, then I’ll do as you wish.”
Your gaze wavers. The war inside you rages—self-hate, doubt, and the unbearable ache of wanting what you can’t have spiraling out of control.
Your mind replays every moment, every laugh, every secret whispered in the quiet safety of his company. You think of how his presence filled the cracks in your life, how he soothed the ache of your solitude as easy as breathing.
And now as the void looms, ready to reclaim the space he’s occupied, something inside you feels irreparably fractured. Something inside you breaks. 
“But,” he whispers, his voice rough with the weight of his conviction, “give me any sign—anything—that you need me still, and I will move heaven and earth to find a way to you.”
Your throat constricts, choking off the words before it could escape. 
You don’t think you’ve ever hated yourself more than you do in that moment.
“Just live your life, Sy-Sy,” you manage, sounding so much like a stranger even to your own ears. The blood roars in your head, drowning out everything but the crushing weight of your words. “You don’t nee—”
“Don’t you dare say it,” he snarls, his voice shaking with unrestrained emotion. “Stop making assumptions. Stop presuming that I don’t need you as much as I need the very ground I stand upon.”
His eyes bore into yours. Heavy. Searching. “What do you want?”
The words strike you like a physical blow, and it leaves you reeling. 
I love you. 
I love you in ways that consume me. 
I don’t know what to do with it—with all the love I have for you.
You force yourself to speak. You spit the words out like a curse, feeling them burn as they leave your mouth.
“Let me go, Sylus.”
The implication of what you’ve said cuts through the fragile air between you. 
The silence stretches.
Suddenly—
“Let you go,” he muses, low and distant, as if the very thought confounds him. His lips twitch into a faint, almost bitter smile. “As if that’s even possible. As if I could simply erase you from me.”
He steps closer to you; each movement deliberate, as though every step bears the weight of a decision you’ve forced him to make. The lump in your throat swells. You don’t speak. You can’t.
You feel like you’re drowning.
“Sylus
”
Please, please don’t make me choose. Please make it stop.
He exhales slowly. “Neither of us wants that.” 
Stop.
“Do you think this is mercy?” His voice is soft. “You believe this will make it easier?”
Please stop. 
“This world hasn’t felt the same ever since. Not since you,” Sylus murmurs, grief hanging heavy in the space between you. “I don’t belong here. Not without you, my love.”
Tears pool in your eyes, hot and relentless, spilling down your cheeks. A sob rips through you, and you quickly look away, unable to meet his gaze. Unable to bear another second of this agony.
He tuts gently, a playful sound—and the familiarity of it kills you, making you cry harder. 
“Look at me,” he coaxes, almost pleading. 
When his gaze locks onto yours, you see that there’s no anger in them. The fire that once raged in his eyes is gone. 
In its place, a quiet resolve.
“You can keep pretending,” he says, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He tilts his head, and there’s something in the way he looks at you—so tenderly fond, as if he sees beyond your defenses, past all the walls you’ve built. “As long as you do not stop me from trying.” 
Sylus looks at you, unwavering, certain in a way that makes your heart ache. It almost feels like the space between you can’t contain the weight of his devotion. His love for you.
It feels infinite, as if it could stretch beyond the limits of time and space itself.
“I will find a way to you, even if it takes me an eternity.ïżœïżœïżœ
He utters it like a promise. 
“I won’t ask you to wait for me,” Sylus murmurs, stepping back, his tall form flickering like a dark phantasm. “I just need you to hold on until I can come to you. Can you do that, little dove?” 
He’s not asking for anything beyond your trust—just the simple act of holding on. Of not letting the weight of your sorrow break you. To trust that he will find a way, no matter how impossible it seems.
You don’t know if you’ve ever believed in anything as much as you believe in him. You always did. 
Because for all the uncertainty, you know one thing: He is yours, as much as you are his. 
So with all the strength you can muster, you nod. “I can.” 
A faint smile plays at the corners of his lips. Your gazes meet, and in that fleeting moment, both of your eyes speak what words fail to convey.
The game crashes for the last time. 
And you know that if you check, the app will be gone from your phone. There’s no going back from this, no undoing what’s lost. Just the burden of knowing it’s over—his exit, permanent. 
Sylus is gone.
The emptiness that follows is immediate. Suffocating. 
You’re left standing there, alone, with only the lingering echo of his presence keeping you buoyed from the crushing weight of isolation. You feel it—the ache in your chest where your heart used to be, brought by the absence of everything he ever was to you. 
Your lover, your best friend.
You try not to let yourself fall apart, not to crumble in the wake of solitude.
You’ll hold onto his promise. And so you’ll keep yours. 
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End A/N: Well—that’s it, folks!
(I’m kidding, don’t kill me. There’s one last chapter left.)
Tagging: @xxfaithlynxx @beewilko @browneyedgirl22 @yournextdoorhousewitch @sunsethw4 @stxrrielle @mangooes @hrts4hanniehae @buggs-1 @michiluvddr @ssetsuka @imm0rtalbutterfly @the-golden-jhope @beomluvrr @milkandstarlight @bookfreakk @ally-the-artistic-turtle @sapphic-daze @sarahthemage @cchiiwinkle @madam8 @slownoise @raendarkfaerie @sylusdarling @luminaaaz @greeenbeean @vvhira @issamomma @shroomiethefrogwhisperer @blueberrysquire @lovely-hani @fiyori @peachystea @aeanya @sylus-crow @queen-serena88 @xthefuckerysquaredx @rayvensblog @poptrim @goldenbirdiee @amerti @angstylittleb1tch @reiofsuns2001 @j4mergy
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cosmiic-world · 4 months ago
Text
both arms cradle you now — sylus
cw: angst/comfort, sylus x reader, sylus has a nightmare :( i love him so much guys </3, inspired by forwards beckon rebound — adrianne lenker, mention of main story events
usually sylus was a sound sleeper. never having nightmares nor dreams. it was the same cycle over and over. wake up, go about his day, sleep, repeat.
that was until you showed up.
now his sleep was riddled with nightmares. they were always different but they all had the same ending. he always lost you in the end.
every night, he would jolt awake, eyes blown wide, heart pounding against his chest frantically, gasping for air.
usually he always slept alone, but not this time.
this time you had stayed at sylus’s base, having lost track of time while you were with him. he insisted you stayed with him, afraid something would happen to you in the N109 zone if you’d left so late.
he watched as you slept so soundly in his arms, your chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. he gently placed a soft kiss onto the top of your head before falling asleep, smiling softly as he drifted to unconsciousness.
usually, his nightmares started the same way. he would be at onychinus’s base, an uneasy feeling deep in his chest. but this time, he was in a grassy field. he knew this field. he had lived in this world before. philos.
he took a tentative step forward, suddenly aware of everything. his long dragon tail dragging across the grass, his horns heavy on his head. he ventured across the lands that were so familiar to him. as he traveled around, suddenly a commotion was heard.
“the monster has been caught!”
“kill her!! kill the monster!”
his head whipped around until his eyes landed on you. his heart fell as he watched you be carried away, blood dripping down your face and body, stumps where horns should’ve been on your head bleeding profusely.
“no..” he said softly, hand reaching for you. his feet suddenly felt heavy, and he was stuck where he stood. he couldn’t do anything but watch as the humans carried you away.
suddenly, his surroundings change and he’s back at the N109 zone, standing in front of you. back with the shopkeeper where he tried to alter your evol. you’re sat in front of him, eyes filled with fear.
“it’s not my fault..! i can resonate just fine with others..” you say, your voice shaky as you look at him.
his heart wrenches in his chest. he can’t control his own actions, he has to go through the motions of the events that have already happened before. he has to relive the pain.
he watches as you cower before the altered robot that he activated. he watches as he grabs your arm, noticing how you try to break free from his hold. he listens as to why you won’t resonate with him.
“she’s either rejecting you, scared of you or
 disgusted by you.” those same words he’s heard before still have the same effect on him. like a knife stabbing through his heart over and over again.
he looks at you and sees the fear and anger that you felt toward him.
“you’re a monster sylus.” he’s taken aback as those words leave your lips. this isn’t what happened. so why?
“what?” he said, his hold on your wrist faltering slightly.
you tear your hand away from him, rage consuming you.
“how could i ever resonate with a monster like you?” you spit out.
his heart might as well have been torn out from his body. he shook his head, trying to escape this nightmare, but to no avail. he was stuck.
“why would you even think that i could resonate with you?” you say, your finger jabbing into his chest, pushing him back.
he let you push him, stumbling back as he listened to your hurtful words.
✧àŒșâ™„ïžŽàŒ»âˆž
as you were sleeping soundly, sylus had begun to stir in his sleep, his nightmare overpowering his consciousness. “sylus..?” you mumbled sleepily as you slowly opened your eyes. you looked at him, his eyes screwed shut, his eyebrows furrowed.
you sat up in bed, gently shaking him in attempt to wake him up. “sylus, wake up.” you said in a soft whisper. your heart wrenched as he softly called your name in his sleep, his expression turning into fear. “my love, wake up.” you said softly as you shook him a bit more aggressively.
you were slightly startled when sylus finally woke up with a gasp, his eyes wide as his chest heaved up and down harshly. “sylus, it’s okay.” you said softly, your hands gentle on his arm.
he sat up and looked at you with slight fear, calling your name softly.
“did you have a nightmare?” you said softly, your gentle gaze watching him. he nodded, his eyes frantically searching your face.
without a word, his arms wrapped around your torso, pulling you close as his head buried into the crook of your neck.
your arms wrapped around his neck, your fingers gently scratching his scalp, tangling with his hair. “it’s okay, my love.” you said softly. “i’m here now. you don’t have to be afraid any longer.”
the sound of your gentle voice soothed him, his eyes closed as he inhaled your sweet and familiar scent.
“i love you.” he said, gently.
“i love you too.” you replied, kissing his head gently.
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08luvmailz · 9 months ago
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đ“‡Œ ME MISS YOU . . àšàš“ !
summary 𓍯 which he followed you because he missed you ꒰ đŸ§Ÿ ꒱ fluffy life with husband
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The eerie silence and the harsh wind whispers weaving through the cool night air, though it's only 5:30 in the afternoon. Crouching low, I fisted my hands through my victim's hair and chopped his head off as my breath steadied, eyes locked on the faint rustle of the bushes—a promising sign of tonight's catch.
It's been almost a year of this endless cycle, by day cuddling and having a blissful life with Mr. Crawling as you give him endless affection, or he will whine to death, and by night- killing humans to feed him. As your eyes wandered through your vision toward the unmoving dead body, your mind wavered toward your husband even though you weren't married officially.
You two are together and bonded by our souls, obeying you and listening to you even though there is a gap in speaking, never ceases to stun you every day. He waits at home, is always patient, and is always trusting. The thought of his joy warms you as you tighten your grip on your crowbar and knife.
Back at the apartment, it feels unbearable still. Mr. Crawling gazes through the door—waiting for your return. His fingers relentlessly tapped the tatami board as it echoed through the room. It's been almost an hour since she left him, she always does every day for him.
He still remembered her voice firming when she told him to stay.
He watches her moving to gather her things, his legs tucked close to his body. He knows her too well—the same command she gives every time. Stay. He doesn't think about it but wants more of her touch, only about the moment before her absence, and he clung to her as his large frame wrapped around her waist. He chirped in a low tone, full of worry and protest. His grip tightened slightly, enough to make his point without holding her back.
He pressed his face into your legs, his arms curling towards your leg, "stay" he told her as he snuggled to her, not wanting to let go, “ you’re so stubborn” she murmured, stroking his head. The gesture was a silent reassurance for him to stop worrying though she knew it wouldn't stop him from worrying.
She turns to face him as his face is still smothered to her thighs, his cold lips puckering into her skin. He doesn’t need words to tell her how he feels; the way he clings to her, his body trembles faintly, caught between his instinct to obey and his need to protect her.
As her warm fingers tangled into his hair, brushing it calmly, she told him, " Me back soon; I find food. " she promised, her voice softer now. “You don’t have to worry.”
With a final sigh, she gently pries him off, his cold finger reluctant to let go. “Stay here,” she says, her tone firmer now, though her heart aches at the look he gives her. He didn't move and obeyed her, as she smiled one last time and crouched to his level to kiss his forehead, " I'll be back soon. I Promise," She said one last time to open and lock the door, leaving him in a trance with determination to follow her.
He was hesitant to disobey her requests and always did, lowering his head in submission. But now, in the suffocating silence, he feels the weight of her absence like a stone in his chest. He tried to wait, his attempts to distract himself with television, watching shows that helped him understand her language more, but as soon as his face glimmered when he saw the heroine with her lover cuddling in a scene. It was no use. missing her so dearly that his pull to follow her was too strong, an instinct older than obedience.
She is his world, his reason, and the thought of her out there alone, facing whatever dangers the night might bring, fills him with unease. Even though he knew she was capable of handling herself well, killing those people for him joyed him. He knew she loved him as much as he loved her.
Making his decision wasn't easy for him, he knew he would face the consequences of her ignoring him though he shook his head, he wanted to see her, he needed her now.
He moves swiftly to the door. His movements are precise and quiet, the art of going unnoticed. He knows where she has gone—he’s watched her enough times at the window to remember the path she takes. He follows her scent, a trail as familiar to him as the rhythm of his footsteps. With every step, he feels her grace like a taut thread, pulling him closer to her.
Its darkness yawned wide like the mouth of a beast. He hesitates for a moment, hearing her voice in his mind, Stay. Wait for me. But he presses on.
He moved carefully, his body blending into the dark foliage as his fingers gripped the pole lamp. He saw her gripping tightly to her crowbar and massively hitting her victim, he watched in awe as pride swelled in his chest at the sight of her—strong, capable, everything he admires.
Though he knows the facade she's been growing through back there in his world, he saw her unreality in a tick of time, and by the hanging thread of webs-he had been with her, and he knew she was close to insanity. Was she close? Or she's already been insane nevertheless, he will always be there with her.
She didn't notice him at first, focused on the task ahead. But then a chitter of a familiar voice captivates your attention as you whip your head, your coat shadowing your expression of bloodlust to confusion. There he is, his head tilted with his adoring smile. She shook her head with a giggle, he never listened to her as she pointed him to get closer to him.
He lowered his body as his smile creeped out to his ear, he skitters toward her, his movements quick but careful as he came faster to her and clung to her lower body as his face smothered to her bloodied coat "I miss you, I love you. " he said with a chitter as his cold hands hold her bloodied ones and directly placed into his head.
You sighed in intent and ruffled his hair as you looked down and cupped his face with our bloodied hands "You didn't listen to me, But I forgive you. " You crouched to his level as his hands wandered to your body and cupped your face and smothered a messy kiss on your lips, his cold lips puckering your bottom lip leaving a chitter from him. "Me love you, " he told you as he came closer to your body, his large frame almost hugging your smaller ones. You giggled to him as you corrected his grammar, always forgetting the "I", " I love you, too. "
He chirps, leaning into her touch, his body vibrating with relief, he clung to her like a baby as his face looked at the bloodied streets. "Food?" He questioned her, as his hands never left hers. "Yeah, food for you. " As she pointed to the dead body beside them.
As she stands up to place the chopped meat in a plastic bag with blood, "Let's go home." her hands directing him to hold her, he stands up, his towering silhouette blending with the shadows of the city. His mind is clear, his resolve unshakable. He is with her, the love of his life, and with every consequence they will face, he knows she will be there with him as she is with him.
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artemisiasmuse · 5 months ago
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rafe catches you watching p*rn
cw: 18+ MDNI duh, fingering, p*rn mentioned, AFAB reader, ovulation mentioned, “girl” used, lots of dirty talk, he talks u thru it
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you’ve been so needy all day and rafe your stupid fucking boyfriend has been gone. you know you shouldn’t be mad really it’s not his fault he has to work and you’re ovulating. not his fault your skin has been burning up all day after he kissed you goodbye, looking as irresistible as usual and smelling so good after his shower.
you’re nearly beside yourself with neediness when the clock strikes 6 and he’s still not home. you huff and writhe on the couch, sick of the pulse between your legs being unattended. you don’t know why it’s so bad this time around, maybe because usually when you’re ovulating rafe is there to take care of you. you don’t know that he’s tracking your cycle, always knowing when you’re the neediest. but he’d forgotten to check the past few days, so caught up with work.
so there you are, in one of his shirts and only your panties, embarrassingly wet from just thinking about your boyfriend. you know your imagination won’t do it though and if you thought too much about him you’d just get angry again. you pull out your phone, idly swiping through twitter, finger hovering over your bookmarks. it would be easy to dip your fingers under the band of your panties and deal with the burning in your core. so easy that you can’t even stop yourself when a video plays on your screen and your fingertips slide past the elastic.
the video reminds you of rafe because of course why else would you watch it. it’s a guy holding his girl’s legs open, slurping obscenely and eating her out like a fiend, unrelenting even after she squirts in his face. the sounds fill the room and you huff a breath as your fingers pick up their pace, entranced by the noises and how you could almost feel rafe doing the same to you. you’re so engrossed that you don’t hear the garage door open, don’t hear your boyfriend walk up to the living room. in your defense you were playing the video loudly.
rafe almost panics at the sound, the insecure and slightly insane part of him ready to knock whoever the fuck is doing that to you out. but then he realizes it’s a video, you’re not even making a sound. he walks as quietly as he can to the source, seeing the top of your head over the couch and he watches your arm move, thrust. he shouldn’t be angry he knows it’s ridiculous to be jealous over your own hand but he is. he’s also getting hard so fast he’s nearly dizzy from how all his blood rushes south. he knows if he sees you he won’t be able to hold back so he makes his presence known.
you’re on the precipice of your orgasm when you hear someone clearing their throat and you instantly lock your phone shut. hand slipping out of your underwear as you prepare to be humiliated. he rounds the couch and plops down next to you, a smirk curling his lips as he watches your pretty eyes widen and your plush thighs close. you’re nearly shaking from arousal but you still hold back because of him.
“no by all means baby keep going.” his arm rests on the back of the couch, leaning into you. he smells just as good if not better than before, his sweat and skin mixing in with his cologne, it’s an addictive scent that you know only you find intoxicating. you’re still so wet and he’s not helping.
“rafe-“ your voice comes out small, almost a whimper. you sound so desperate he feels bad, clearly he hadn’t tended to you properly.
“or how about, you tell me about it?” his arm comes down on your side easily, pulling you onto his lap. you whine at the small friction of his pants against your clothed cunt.
“i needed you all day,” you whine at him, the feeling of your release fleeting is making your eyes sting and you pout at him. rafe’s hands slide against your skin, disregarding the shirt and kneading at your waist. the tips of his fingers graze your waistband and you’re not above begging for him to dip under.
“what were you watching baby?” you whine at his question, realizing he won’t give in until you talk.
“rafe please-“ your hips grind down, his hands keep you still, firm and bruising.
“come on you wanted to be a whore, you can answer.” he slaps your clit, not quite touching you but reminding you that your still his.
“he was eating her out, reminded me of you.” you murmur and he smiles behind you, stocky and long fingers pushing your panties to the side as his hand glided over your messy cunt.
“good girl.” you huffed at his words, trying to grind yourself against his hand. “nearly dripping onto me, you miss me that bad?” you’re so wet rafe thinks you must have been needy for hours. he’s only felt this after marathon sex and even then it’s from his mouth. he can feel your clit throbbing and your folds are puffy from inattention.
“y-yes.” you nod against him, moaning when his fingers slide into you. you’re so sensitive from being worked up all day the cold press of his ring makes you shake against him. it’s a delicious contrast to the heat you feel melting your brain. rafe’s fingers and hands are one of your favorite parts of him, they’re long and thick and somehow always know where to touch you best.
“poor baby, just needed someone to touch this drooling cunt huh? can’t go a day without my dick hmm?” you can’t respond when he starts fingering you, you think you won’t even be heard because your cunt is obscenely loud. squelches fill the room as he thrusts into you, your slick connecting his hand to your cunt like a string. he can already feel a wet patch on his pants under you and he swears under his breath at how wet you are. you’re so tight around his fingers, clenching like you don’t want them to ever leave. he curls them upwards and you shriek, grabbing his arm with both of your hands. “fucking brat, take it.” your grip does nothing to slow him down, hammering at your most sensitive spot and your brain shuts off. the sparks of pleasure fry your nerve endings and your eyes roll back into your head, rafe adds a third finger stretching you open and his thumb swirls around your clit. combined with the drag of his fingertips against your g-spot you’re crumbling within seconds. “there it is, come on baby, you’re doing so well” his gruff voice coaxes you into submission. the pressure building and building until you’re screaming and thrashing in his arms. your orgasm wrecks you and the dam breaks. you’re squirting into the air in front of you and rafe isn’t slowing down, pulling everything he can out of you. you’ve already drenched him what’s the point in holding back now?
a/n: omg heyyyy did yall miss me :> i missed u all ive been super busy and dw i am writing! this just came to me and i had to post it asap and yes im ovulating next question
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elikajinnie · 8 months ago
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Steal Your Way To My Heart - N.R (Part 1)
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P: Bankrobber! Ni-ki X Fem!Reader
Requested by: @badtzsan (hope you like it <3)
Warnings: Teasing, Pursuing, Murder, Kidnapping, Violence, Obsession, Stalking, Flirting, Ni-ki just wanna cover you in jewels tbh.
Synopsis: Your life was boring—until a visit to the bank changes everything. Now you find yourself under the attention of one of the criminals. Now what do you do when the criminal's attention isn't just on the job but on you?
a/n: inspired by false alarm mv by the weeknd pr request :)
See request here
--
Your days were always underwhelming.
You’d wake up to the sound of your alarm, drag yourself out of bed, and go through the same motions: school, then work, then home. Over and over, like clockwork. And somewhere along the line, it became suffocating.
Each morning felt heavier than the last, your feet dragging like you were wading through wet cement. You found yourself staring out windows more often than not, watching the world pass you by. Same streets, same faces, same everything.
You craved something more. Something to set your blood pumping, your heart racing. You didn’t just want change—you needed it. The kind of adrenaline that would make you feel alive again, remind you that there was more out there than just this monotonous cycle you’d been stuck in.
But nothing ever happened.
You’d given up on expecting it. Change, excitement, anything—it wasn’t in the cards for you. At least, that’s what you thought.
Until one morning.
You were running late for work, your bag slung haphazardly over your shoulder as you weaved through the crowded streets. The morning rush wasn’t anything new, but you were moving too fast, too distracted, and you didn’t even notice the figure walking toward you until it was too late.
You crashed into him with enough force to make you stumble back a step. Your bag slipped from your shoulder, scattering its contents onto the sidewalk.
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry!” you gasped, immediately crouching to gather your things.
“No, it’s my fault,” came the response, a smooth, low voice that made you pause mid-grab.
You glanced up, an automatic, polite apology ready on your lips—but it never made it out.
Your breath caught.
He was tall, towering over you even as he crouched to help pick up your things. Dark hair framed a sharp jawline, his skin smooth and flawless in the morning light. But it was his eyes that held you captive—piercing, intense, like they could see right through you. For a moment, you forgot how to breathe.
“You okay?” he asked, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
You blinked, snapping out of your daze. “Y-Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry again, I wasn’t paying attention.”
He handed you your phone, his fingers brushing against yours for the briefest moment. “Don’t worry about it. Happens to the best of us.”
You stood together, and now that you were face-to-face, the sheer presence of him was almost overwhelming. There was something about him that felt
 off. Not in a bad way, but in a way that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. Like he wasn’t supposed to be here, in this moment, colliding with you.
“Well, uh
” you began awkwardly, suddenly hyperaware of how plain your uniform looked compared to how effortlessly cool he was. “Thanks.”
Before he could respond, the distant chime of your phone’s clock reminded you that you were late—really late.
“I have to go,” you blurted, clutching your bag tightly.
He smiled again, softer this time, and nodded. “Of course. See you around
?”
You didn’t answer, too flustered as you turned and hurried off. But as you glanced back over your shoulder, he was still standing there, watching you with an expression you couldn’t quite place.
You didn’t know it then, but that moment would change everything.
You didn’t know it at first.
How could you? To you, it had just been a fleeting moment, an odd yet strangely thrilling encounter with a handsome stranger. Sure, his face had lingered in your mind longer than you’d like to admit, but life didn’t stop just because you ran into someone attractive.
Day after day, you returned to your routine: school, work, home. And yet
 something felt different. Subtle, at first—like a faint whisper at the back of your mind. You’d catch yourself glancing over your shoulder as you walked down the street, or feeling your pulse quicken when a shadow flickered in your peripheral vision.
But you brushed it off. You were overthinking things, you told yourself. It was probably just your imagination playing tricks on you.
You didn’t know that it wasn’t.
Because he was watching you.
The same guy you’d crashed into that morning. Day after day, he followed you. He was careful, almost eerily so. He stayed just far enough away that you’d never notice. Blended into the crowd so seamlessly that you’d never think to look twice.
But he was there. Always.
He saw the way you rushed into work, cheeks flushed from the cold or the stress of running late. He saw the way you smiled politely at customers, even when they were rude to you. He saw the way your shoulders slumped when you thought no one was looking, the weariness of your routine weighing you down.
He saw you.
And every day, he learned more.
Your patterns, your habits. The exact time you’d leave your apartment in the morning. The small cafĂ© you stopped by occasionally, ordering the same drink every time. The way you lingered outside the bookstore window after work, staring at the same display of novels you never seemed to have time to read.
You were fascinating to him.
But it wasn’t just fascination—it was something darker. Something possessive.
And it wasn’t long before the distance he kept began to shrink.
One night, as you left work later than usual, the streetlights barely illuminating the empty sidewalk ahead of you, you felt it again—that nagging feeling, like someone was watching you.
You glanced behind you, but there was nothing. Just the empty street stretching out behind you, silent except for the faint hum of distant traffic.
You shook your head, scolding yourself for being paranoid.
But as you turned back around, you didn’t see the figure slipping into the shadows, just a few steps behind where you’d been standing.
He was getting closer. And you still didn’t know.
He kept his distance, always careful, always calculated.
Day after day, he followed you, studying every detail of your life like it was a puzzle he needed to solve. But he never showed himself. Not yet.
He learned the way you brushed a strand of hair behind your ear when you were deep in thought, the way your lips pressed into a thin line when you were frustrated, and the soft laugh you let out when you read something funny on your phone. He memorized your patterns as if they were sacred—your favorite routes, the way you adjusted your pace when the streets were crowded, and the shortcuts you took when you were running late.
And still, you didn’t know.
But you began to feel it.
The unease settled in your chest like a stone, heavier each passing day. You couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was there—watching, waiting. When you walked home at night, the silence felt too loud, the shadows too alive. You found yourself glancing over your shoulder more often, your heart racing for reasons you couldn’t explain.
But no one was ever there.
You started locking your doors twice before bed, pulling the curtains closed even though you’d always liked the city lights spilling into your room. You told yourself you were just being paranoid. That nothing was wrong.
But he was getting bolder.
One night, as you walked home, your bag slung over your shoulder and your headphones in, you felt it again—that prickling sensation on the back of your neck. Your steps faltered, your hand tightening around the strap of your bag.
You paused and looked around, the dim streetlights casting long, eerie shadows on the empty road.
There was no one there.
You shook your head, muttering to yourself about how ridiculous you were being, and picked up your pace.
Behind you, in the shadows, he stood perfectly still, his head tilting ever so slightly as he watched you disappear down the street.
He could have reached out. Could have closed the distance between you. Could have made himself known.
But he didn’t. Not yet.
--
The bank was quiet, save for the faint hum of the air conditioning and the occasional shuffle of feet. You sat on a plastic chair near the wall, scrolling aimlessly through your phone, half-distracted by notifications you didn’t care enough to open.
It was late on a Friday, and the place was nearly empty—a few tellers behind the counter, a couple arguing softly over paperwork, a man in a suit sitting near the door, tapping his foot impatiently.
You weren’t expecting much. Just another mundane errand to tick off your never-ending list of obligations.
Then they walked in.
The doors burst open, slamming against the walls with a loud bang that echoed through the room. You looked up instinctively, your fingers freezing over your phone screen.
There were four of them, maybe five—it was hard to tell in the chaos that followed. They were dressed head to toe in black, their faces hidden behind masks: a snarling wolf, a grinning clown, a featureless white face, and a grotesque demon.
And they were armed.
“Everyone on the floor!” one of them barked, his voice distorted through the mask, the barrel of his gun sweeping across the room.
Your heart dropped, your body reacting before your brain could catch up. You slid off the chair and onto the floor, your phone slipping from your hands as you pressed yourself flat against the cold tiles. Around you, the other people in the bank were doing the same—some crying softly, others frozen in stunned silence.
“Hands where we can see them!” another one shouted, their voice sharper, more aggressive.
You obeyed, trembling as you stretched your arms out in front of you. Your breaths came in short, panicked gasps, the floor suddenly feeling too hard, too cold, too close.
One of the masked figures strode past you, their boots heavy against the floor. You flinched as they moved, your body instinctively shrinking in on itself.
You tried not to look up, to stay small and invisible, but your gaze flicked upward for just a second—and you saw the wolf-masked figure staring right at you.
The mask tilted slightly, as if they were studying you. You froze, your blood running cold as your eyes locked with the dark voids of the mask’s eye holes.
“Keep your head down,” the figure growled, their voice low and menacing.
You dropped your gaze immediately, your entire body trembling as you pressed your forehead against the floor.
Behind you, one of the robbers barked orders to the tellers, demanding cash. The sounds of drawers opening, paper rustling, and the muffled sobs of a teller filled the room.
“Move faster!” another one snapped, slamming their hand against the counter.
The tension in the air was suffocating, every second stretching into what felt like an eternity. Your mind raced, a whirlwind of panic and fear. What did they want? Would they hurt someone? Would they hurt you?
You didn’t dare move, didn’t dare breathe too loudly.
But amidst the chaos, a thought nagged at the back of your mind—this wasn’t random. The timing, the masks, the precision. Something about it felt deliberate.
And then, you felt it again—that same sensation that had been haunting you for days.
The feeling of being watched.
Slowly, carefully, you shifted your eyes to the side, just enough to see the wolf-masked figure standing a few feet away. Their head was turned toward you again, their stance unnervingly still compared to the chaos around them.
It was like they weren’t even focused on the heist anymore.
They were focused on you.
The chaos continued to unfold around you, the masked figures shouting commands and waving their guns as the tellers scrambled to fill duffel bags with cash. The sound of drawers slamming and the occasional muffled sob of a hostage filled the air, but all you could focus on was the crushing weight of fear in your chest.
Then the clown came closer.
You didn’t see him at first, too focused on staying still and small, but you felt the shadow looming over you. A pair of scuffed boots came into your view, stopping just inches from your head.
"Well, well, look at this," the clown mask sneered, his voice dripping with malice.
You barely had time to flinch before he noticed your phone lying on the floor, just by your head. He chuckled darkly, lifting his boot and slamming it down onto the device with enough force to shatter it into pieces. The crack of the screen echoed through the room, making you jump.
“No phones!” he shouted, crouching down just enough to get in your face. His mask’s grinning expression felt mocking, his gun now pointed directly at your temple.
Your blood turned ice-cold as you froze, your breath catching in your throat.
“What do we have here?” he taunted, leaning in closer. “You trying to be a hero? Huh? Recording us, maybe?”
“No!” you choked out, your voice barely above a whisper. “I wasn’t, I swear!”
The barrel of the gun pressed harder against your temple, and you clenched your eyes shut, shaking uncontrollably. “You better not be lying to me,” he hissed.
But before he could say anything else, a hand shoved him hard, knocking him off balance.
“Back off!” the wolf snapped, his voice sharp and commanding.
The clown stumbled but caught himself, turning to glare at the wolf. “What’s your problem?” he spat.
“The money’s the priority,” the wolf said, his tone leaving no room for argument. “Not wasting time threatening some random girl.”
For a moment, the clown hesitated, his finger twitching near the trigger as he glanced between you and the wolf. You held your breath, terrified of what he might do.
Finally, with a frustrated growl, he stepped back, lowering his gun. “Fine. Whatever.” He shot you one last glare before storming off toward the counters, muttering under his breath.
The wolf lingered for a moment, his masked face still angled toward you. Even though you couldn’t see his expression, you felt his eyes boring into you, assessing you, as if silently telling you to stay put and stay quiet.
Then he turned and walked away, joining the others as they stuffed more cash into their bags.
Your heart was pounding so loudly you were sure everyone in the room could hear it. You stayed frozen on the floor, trembling, as the chaos continued around you.
Before you could even begin to process what had just happened, a gloved hand yanked you up by your arm.
“Get up!” a rough voice barked behind the grotesque demon mask.
Your legs wobbled as you were hauled to your feet, your body stiff with terror. “Wait—what are you doing? Let me go!” you stammered, trying to pull away, but the grip on your arm was like iron.
The wolf approached swiftly, his movements precise and deliberate. He didn’t say a word as he reached into his bag, pulling out a pair of handcuffs. You froze, your breath hitching as he grabbed your wrists, forcing them together in front of you.
The cold steel bit into your skin as the cuffs clicked shut.
“W-Why are you doing this?” you pleaded, panic rising in your voice.
The wolf didn’t answer. He only exchanged a glance with the demon, and before you knew it, they were dragging you toward the counter, your shoes scuffing against the tiled floor as you struggled.
“Stop! Please!” you cried, thrashing against their hold, but it was no use. They were too strong.
They pulled you around the counter, past the terrified tellers huddled on the floor, and toward a back door you hadn’t even noticed before. The demon shoved the door open, and that’s when it happened.
Gunfire erupted, the sound splitting the air like thunder. You screamed, instinctively ducking as chaos exploded around you.
The cops were here.
Bullets tore through the doorframe, shards of wood and plaster flying everywhere as the robbers scrambled for cover. The wolf yanked you to the side, his grip on your arm unrelenting as he pulled you out of the line of fire. The demon cursed loudly, returning fire with his assault rifle as the clown and the others shouted orders.
You were caught in the middle of it all, your heart pounding so hard it felt like it would break through your ribs.
“Move! Move!” the wolf barked, dragging you further back into the bank as the others laid down suppressive fire.
You stumbled over your own feet, the cuffs cutting into your wrists as you were manhandled left and right. The gunfire was deafening, each shot sending a jolt of terror through your body.
“Let me go!” you screamed, tears streaming down your face as you tried to resist.
But they didn’t listen. The demon shoved you forward, almost knocking you over, while the wolf kept a firm hold on your arm, steering you toward what looked like a service entrance.
“Take her through the alley!” one of the robbers shouted—maybe the clown, you couldn’t tell anymore.
“No time!” the demon snapped. “They’ve got the back covered too!”
More gunfire erupted, and you ducked again, your ears ringing from the sheer volume of the shots. The smell of gunpowder and fear was thick in the air, suffocating you as you were dragged further into the chaos.
The fire exit door slammed open, and chaos followed you into the cold night air.
Gunshots cracked like thunder around you as the masked robbers fired wildly at the police closing in from all sides. You stumbled as they dragged you forward, your wrists aching against the cuffs, your legs barely able to keep up.
“Cover me!” the demon barked, his assault rifle spraying bullets toward the flashing red-and-blue lights in the distance.
The wolf, still gripping your arm, yanked you harder, pulling you toward a white van that screeched to a halt just ahead. Its tires skidded on the asphalt, smoke billowing around it. The sliding door flung open, and you barely had time to register the driver—a figure in a grotesque zombie mask—before the robbers began throwing the bags of money into the back.
“Get in!” the clown yelled, his voice sharp and frantic.
You resisted, digging your heels into the ground as they tried to force you forward. “No! Let me go!” you screamed, thrashing wildly.
The demon growled in frustration and shoved you forward. “Quit fighting, or I’ll give you a reason to stop!”
Your body collided with the hard interior of the van as the wolf hoisted you up and shoved you inside. The smell of leather and gasoline filled your nose as you landed on your side, your hands still bound in front of you.
“Move!” the zombie driver shouted, his voice muffled but commanding.
The demon and the clown scrambled into the van, slamming the door shut as the wolf climbed in last, still holding his weapon.
The van roared to life, its engine growling as it sped off, tires screeching against the pavement.
You were thrown to the side as the van lurched forward, and you struggled to push yourself upright, your heart racing as panic set in. Outside the windows, flashes of blue and red danced in the dark, and the distant wail of sirens grew louder.
“They’re right on us!” the clown shouted, peering out the back window.
“Then lose them!” the demon snapped, slamming a fresh magazine into his gun.
The zombie swerved the van violently, narrowly avoiding a blockade of police cars as bullets ricocheted off the metal exterior. The robbers fired back through the open windows, their weapons deafening in the cramped space.
You pressed yourself against the corner of the van, your knees tucked to your chest as the chaos unfolded around you. Your ears rang from the gunfire, your body shaking uncontrollably as you watched the masked figures shout and fire, their movements chaotic yet disturbingly practiced.
One of the cops’ vehicles pulled up alongside the van, its siren blaring as an officer leaned out the window, aiming a weapon.
“Take them out!” the demon ordered.
The clown let out a sharp laugh, rolling down the window and leaning out with his rifle. “With pleasure.”
The van swerved again as he fired, the sound of bullets tearing through the air making you scream. The police car veered off course, skidding to a halt as its tires blew out, sending sparks flying.
“Hell yeah!” the clown shouted, slapping the side of the van as he ducked back inside.
The wolf, sitting closest to you, glanced your way. His mask tilted slightly, as if he were studying you again, his body unnervingly calm compared to the others.
You pressed yourself further into the corner, your breath coming in shallow gasps. “Please,” you whimpered, your voice trembling. “Why are you doing this? Just let me go!”
He didn’t answer.
Instead, the zombie yelled from the driver’s seat, “We’re clear for now, but they’ll be on us again soon! Where’s the next checkpoint?”
The demon pulled out a map, spreading it across the floor of the van. “Couple miles out. We ditch the van there and split up.”
“And her?” the clown asked, jerking his head in your direction. “What do we do with her?”
The air in the van grew heavier, the question hanging like a loaded gun.
“She stays,” the wolf said firmly, his voice low.
The others exchanged glances, but no one argued.
You stared at him, your mind racing. Why? Why did he insist on keeping you?
You pressed your back harder against the cold metal wall of the van, your knees drawn up to your chest. Every fiber of your being screamed to fight, to yell, to do something—anything—but you didn’t. You stayed quiet, hoping that silence would keep you alive.
The robbers kept moving, the van swerving sharply as the zombie masked driver navigated the dark streets. Every turn jostled you, the cuffs on your wrists digging into your skin.
“Are we clear?” the clown asked, his voice tense as he peered out the back window.
“Not yet,” the demon growled, his rifle resting on his lap as he reloaded. “They’ll catch up. We need to move faster.”
“They can’t keep up,” the zombie argued from the front. “I know these streets. We’ll lose them soon.”
The van fell into a tense silence, the occasional crackle of the police radio chatter outside filtering through the open window. You kept your head down, your breaths shallow, trying to make yourself as small and invisible as possible.
But the weight of the wolf’s gaze was still on you.
You could feel it without even looking up, the way he sat so still compared to the others. It was like he was watching you, studying your every move, even though you weren’t making any.
Finally, the clown broke the silence with a loud sigh. “This is getting boring,” he muttered, leaning back against the van wall. “We should’ve left her behind. Dead weight.”
You flinched at his words, your hands trembling as you clenched them tightly together.
“She’s insurance,” the wolf said coldly, his tone cutting through the air like a blade. “In case things go south.”
“Insurance, huh?” the clown sneered, tilting his head toward you. “She doesn’t look like much. What are you gonna do? Use her as a human shield?”
The wolf didn’t respond.
“Enough,” the demon snapped, silencing the clown with a glare. “She’s here. That’s the end of it.”
The clown grumbled under his breath but said nothing more, turning his attention back to the window.
You glanced up briefly, your eyes darting to the wolf. He was sitting across from you, his posture relaxed yet somehow alert. His mask tilted slightly, as if he knew you were looking at him.
You quickly looked away, your pulse quickening.
The van suddenly jerked to the side, making everyone lurch forward.
“Checkpoint’s up ahead,” the zombie announced, his voice calm but firm. “Get ready to move.”
The tension in the van grew heavier as the others prepared themselves, checking their weapons and adjusting their masks.
You stayed frozen, your mind racing. What would happen at the checkpoint? Would they let you go? Or was this just the beginning of something worse?
The wolf shifted in his seat, leaning closer to you. You tensed as his gloved hand reached out, grabbing the chain of the cuffs around your wrists.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” he said quietly, his voice low enough that only you could hear.
Your breath caught in your throat, and you nodded shakily, unable to muster the strength to speak.
The van slowed to a stop, the sound of gravel crunching beneath the tires.
The demon opened the sliding door, his rifle at the ready. “Move,” he ordered, gesturing for everyone to get out.
The clown and the wolf exited first, guns drawn as they scanned the area. The zombie stayed in the driver’s seat, his hands gripping the wheel tightly, ready to bolt if things went sideways.
Then the demon turned to you.
“Let’s go,” he growled, grabbing your arm and yanking you out of the van.
The night air hit you like a slap, cold and sharp, as you stumbled onto the gravel.
The wolf was by your side in an instant, his hand on your arm again, steadying you. It wasn’t comforting. It was a reminder that you weren’t going anywhere.You were then half-dragged, half-pushed toward a row of hidden vehicles parked in the shadows of the industrial area. Engines roared to life as the robbers split up, each group climbing into separate cars.
The wolf steered you toward a sleek black car, opening the passenger door and shoving you inside with startling precision. Before you could even think of resisting, he leaned over, pulling the seat belt across your body and fastening it with a decisive click.
The movement was quick but strangely careful, as if ensuring you wouldn’t get hurt. You stared at him, breathless and wide-eyed, as he settled into the driver’s seat without a word.
The clown slid into the back seat, slamming the door shut behind him. “Let’s move!” he barked, his tone impatient.
The wolf didn’t reply. He simply started the engine, his gloved hands gripping the wheel as the car roared to life. Without hesitation, he pressed the gas, the tires screeching against the pavement as the car sped off into the night.
Through the rearview mirror, you could see the other vehicles peeling off in different directions, each taking a separate route to evade the cops.
The silence in the car was deafening, broken only by the hum of the engine and the faint sound of sirens fading into the distance.
You sat stiffly in the passenger seat, your hands clenched in your lap as you tried to steady your breathing. The wolf’s presence beside you was overwhelming, his calm demeanor in stark contrast to the chaos you had just witnessed.
From the back seat, the clown let out a sharp laugh. “Man, did you see the look on those cops’ faces? Like they didn’t even know what hit ‘em!”
The wolf didn’t respond, his focus entirely on the road ahead.
The clown leaned forward, resting his elbows on the back of your seat. “So, what’s the plan with her, huh?” he asked, jerking his thumb toward you.
You flinched, your shoulders tensing as his attention shifted to you.
The wolf’s grip on the steering wheel tightened slightly, but his voice remained steady. “She’s coming with us. That’s all you need to know.”
The clown scoffed, sitting back again. “You’re getting soft, Wolf. Letting her ride shotgun like she’s part of the team or something.”
The wolf glanced at you briefly, his mask hiding whatever expression might have crossed his face. Then he turned his attention back to the road.
“She’s leverage,” he said simply.
The clown muttered something under his breath, but he didn’t push the subject any further.
You turned your head toward the window, watching the dark streets blur past as the car sped through empty intersections and winding back roads. The reality of the situation was beginning to sink in, the adrenaline fading just enough to leave you with a sick, hollow feeling in your chest.
You were completely at their mercy, trapped with no way out.
And yet, there was something strange about the wolf.
He hadn’t hurt you—not like the others. He hadn’t yelled at you, threatened you, or treated you like a disposable hostage. His actions were calculated, almost protective, even if you didn’t understand why.
But that didn’t make him any less dangerous.
The clown’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “So where are we headed, anyway? Safehouse number two?”
“No,” the wolf said. “Too obvious. We’re heading to the fallback location.”
The clown groaned. “Great. Another night in the middle of nowhere.”
You didn’t dare ask what the fallback location was.
Instead, you kept quiet, your heart pounding as the car sped further and further away from anything familiar.
The engine roared as the wolf pressed the pedal harder, the car speeding down the dark, desolate roads. You gripped the edge of the seat with your cuffed hands, your body stiff as you stared out the windshield, too terrified to look anywhere else.
Behind you, the clown rummaged through the two duffel bags, his gloved hands pulling out wads of cash. The bills rustled as he counted, his voice loud and obnoxious in the tense silence.
“Ten grand, twenty, thirty,” he muttered, stacking the money in neat piles on his lap. “Damn, this haul’s better than the last one. Maybe we should hit banks more often.”
The wolf didn’t respond, his eyes fixed on the road ahead, his hands gripping the wheel with calm precision.
The clown snorted, shaking his head. “You’re no fun, you know that? All business, no celebration. You could at least crack a smile under that mask.”
“I’m driving,” the wolf said flatly. His voice was low, steady, and completely unbothered by the clown’s antics.
The clown scoffed, shoving another bundle of cash back into the bag. “Yeah, yeah, Mr. Professional. Always the same with you.”
You glanced at the rearview mirror, catching a glimpse of the clown’s mask—a twisted, grinning face that sent a chill down your spine. He noticed you looking and leaned forward, his head tilting as if he were smirking beneath the mask.
“What about you, huh?” he said, his tone dripping with mockery. “You enjoying the ride, sweetheart? This must be the most excitement you’ve had in your boring little life.”
You stiffened, refusing to answer.
The clown laughed, a sharp, grating sound. “Aw, come on, don’t be shy. You’re practically part of the crew now. Maybe we’ll even cut you a share.”
“That’s enough,” the wolf said sharply, his voice cutting through the air like a knife.
The clown raised his hands in mock surrender, leaning back in his seat. “Fine, fine. I’m just trying to lighten the mood. You’re such a buzzkill, Wolf.”
The wolf didn’t reply, his focus returning to the road.
You swallowed hard, your throat dry as your mind raced. The clown’s teasing was unnerving, but the wolf’s silence was worse. He was an enigma—calm, controlled, and impossible to read.
The car swerved slightly as the wolf took a sharp turn, the tires screeching against the pavement.
The car sped down the empty streets, the hum of the engine filling the tense silence. After a while, the clown’s fidgeting grew louder, and you could sense his boredom brewing. He leaned forward again, resting his arms on the back of your seat.
“So,” he drawled, his tone laced with mock curiosity. “What’s your name, sweetheart?”
You hesitated, glancing toward the wolf, who showed no sign of responding. His grip on the steering wheel remained steady, his eyes locked on the road ahead.
“I asked you a question,” the clown pressed, tilting his head. The subtle way his fingers drummed against the gun in his hand sent a shiver down your spine.
You swallowed hard, deciding that staying silent wasn’t worth the risk. You answered him, your voice barely above a whisper.
He repeated your name, as if testing the way it sounded. “Nice. Bet you never thought you’d end up on an adventure like this, huh?”
You didn’t answer, staring straight ahead as your fingers fidgeted with the edge of your seatbelt.
The clown chuckled, the sound low and unnerving. “Not much of a talker, are you? That’s alright. Quiet’s good.” His tone shifted, becoming smoother, almost flirtatious. “But you don’t have to be shy with me. I’m not as scary as I look.”
Your stomach turned, and you instinctively leaned slightly closer to the door, putting as much distance as you could between you and his presence looming behind you.
Still, you managed to force out a stiff response, if only to keep him from getting more agitated. “I don’t really
 feel like talking.”
The clown’s laugh was sharper this time. “Come on, don’t be like that. You’ve got a pretty face. Might as well use that pretty voice to keep me entertained.”
Your body tensed, the flirty edge in his tone setting your nerves on fire. Before you could react—or even glance at the wolf for help—the car lurched to an abrupt stop, the tires screeching loudly against the pavement.
The sudden motion threw you forward in your seat, your seatbelt catching you just in time, but the clown wasn’t as lucky. He pitched forward, hitting his head hard with a muffled thud.
“Goddammit!” he cursed, rubbing his forehead through his mask as he sat back. “What the hell, Wolf?!”
“The light’s red,” he said coldly, nodding toward the traffic light ahead.
The clown let out a disbelieving laugh, waving his hand dismissively. “You’ve never stopped at a red light before. What’s the deal?”
The wolf’s grip on the wheel didn’t loosen, but his tone dropped lower, sharper. “I stopped.”
The clown muttered something under his breath, leaning back in his seat with a groan. “Fine, whatever. You’re the boss.”
You stole a glance at the wolf, your heart racing. His mask obscured his face, but his posture told you everything. His shoulders were rigid, his breathing controlled but heavy, and the way his hands clenched the steering wheel made it clear—he was furious.
But why? Was it because of the clown’s behavior toward you?
The light turned green, and the wolf started driving again, the car moving smoothly as if nothing had happened.
The clown stayed quiet for a moment before letting out a huff. “Man, you’re wound up tight tonight. Need to relax.”
The wolf didn’t reply, his focus entirely on the road.
You could feel the weight of exhaustion dragging at you, your body craving rest, but your mind refused to let go. The tension in the car was thick, and every muscle in your body screamed for a break. But you knew better than to trust sleep around these men. The fear of what might happen if you closed your eyes was far too strong.
The road beneath the tires seemed to stretch on forever, and you blinked hard, doing your best to keep your focus. Every time you thought you might drift off, a sharp turn or the sound of the clown laughing from behind you pulled you back into reality.
Finally, the car slowed to a stop, the engine purring to a halt in the quiet night. You blinked rapidly, trying to clear the haze of exhaustion from your vision, but you were still too disoriented.
The clown’s voice broke through your foggy thoughts. “Alright, we’re here. Let’s go.”
The wolf opened his door without a word and stepped out, his heavy boots crunching against the pavement as the clown followed suit. Your door swung open, and before you could gather your bearings, the wolf’s cold hand gripped your arm, pulling you roughly out of the car.
You stumbled slightly, your legs unsteady from the long ride, but the wolf didn’t give you any room to regain your balance. “Move,” the wolf growled, and you had no choice but to follow, your body moving instinctively even as your mind screamed in protest.
The wolf continued leading you, his eyes sharp and watchful as he guided you toward a steel elevator.
You tried to keep your breathing steady, but the fear gnawed at you as the elevator doors closed with a dull thud, the sound of the mechanical gears grinding making you feel even more trapped.
The elevator descended with a slow, jarring motion, your stomach lurching as you were pulled deeper underground.
When the doors finally opened, you were greeted by a dimly lit basement. Concrete floors stretched out before you, and the air felt musty and stale, like it hadn’t been disturbed in ages.
The clown’s voice echoed in the silence as he dropped the bags of money on a long wooden table. “First group here, huh?” He grinned, turning toward the wolf. “We need a bigger place if we’re going to keep up with the haul.”
The wolf didn’t answer him. His gaze never left you, and he moved toward a small door at the far end of the room.
“You’re staying here,” he said, his voice firm and low.
You didn’t have time to protest before he unlocked the door and shoved you inside. The room was sparse—bare concrete walls, a single bed in the corner, and a small desk against the wall. There was a single light bulb hanging overhead, casting an eerie glow over the room.
Before you could fully register what was happening, the wolf had locked the door behind you, his footsteps echoing as he walked away.
You stood frozen for a moment, your heart pounding in your chest.
You were alone.
Alone in a cold, unfamiliar room, trapped with no clear way out.
Time seemed to stretch endlessly in that cold, empty room. Hours passed—or maybe it was just minutes, you couldn’t be sure. You paced the small space, trying to think of some way out, but all your thoughts kept circling back to the same grim reality.
But just as the weight of your fear felt unbearable, the door to your cell creaked open. You didn’t move at first, too exhausted and emotionally drained to react. But then you saw him—the wolf.
He stood in the doorway, his presence towering and suffocating, his eyes dark and unreadable beneath his mask.
“Come on,” he said, his voice low and commanding.
You didn’t hesitate, feeling an instinctive pull to move despite the part of you that screamed to resist. There was nothing to gain from defiance—not here, not with him.
His gloved hand grabbed your arm firmly, pulling you out of the room with a force that left you no room to protest. As you were led down the dimly lit hallway, you passed the other robbers. They didn’t speak, their gaze on you. The clown sat lazily at the table, fiddling with a lighter, his gaze flicking up for a brief moment, but he didn’t say anything.
The wolf didn’t stop, dragging you forward with an unyielding grip. He grabbed a bag from the table without a word, his focus fixed ahead.
You were taken back to the elevator, its cold metal doors sliding open with a hiss. The same grinding sound as before filled the air as the elevator took you upward, the quiet hum of its mechanics deafening in the otherwise still atmosphere.
When the doors opened again, you were faced with the world outside, the harsh light of the morning sun streaming in. The wolf shoved you toward a sleek red car waiting at the curb, its engine idling, ready to take you away.
The sun had begun to rise, casting long shadows on the pavement, signaling the end of the night. The city was waking up, but you felt like you were in another world entirely. The red car’s door swung open, and the wolf pushed you into the passenger seat with a firm hand. He climbed into the driver’s side without a word, his movements swift and deliberate.
The car roared to life, pulling away from the curb as the wheels crunched over the gravel.
The wolf’s gaze flickered briefly toward you, but he didn’t say anything. He just drove, his hands steady on the wheel as the car hummed down the road.
The tension in your shoulders, the constant dread you’d been carrying, began to ease—ever so slightly. Your eyelids fluttered, heavy from the exhaustion you’d been pushing through, the lack of sleep catching up to you. You tried to stay alert, but it was harder and harder to keep your eyes open.
And before you realized it, your head dipped forward, your body relaxing into the seat. Your breathing slowed, soft and steady, as you drifted into sleep.
The wolf’s eyes flickered over to you, his gaze briefly softening as he saw your head resting against the window. The corner of his lips twitched into something resembling a smile, though it was hidden behind his mask. There was a deep sense of satisfaction that washed over him.
--
You slowly opened your eyes, the soft light from the window spilling across the plush linens. The warmth of the bed made you feel disoriented, almost too comfortable, and the moment you became fully aware of your surroundings, a cold wave of shock hit you.
You were in a luxurious hotel suite, the kind you’d only seen in movies or heard about from those who had money to spend. The room was large, with expensive-looking furniture scattered about, dark wood and gold accents giving it a rich, elegant feel. The bed you had woken up in was massive, the sheets pristine white and slightly crumpled.
You sighed, the weight of the confusion and fear coming back. Your body was sore, and you could still feel the faint remnants of exhaustion in your limbs. But somehow, it felt wrong to stay here. You didn’t know where here was, but it certainly didn’t feel like a place you should be.
With a deep breath, you slowly sat up, your feet touching the cold floor. After a moment’s pause, you decided you couldn’t just sit here, unsure of what was going on.
The hallway outside the room was silent, save for the muffled sound of distant chatter. You stepped out and walked toward the elevator, your mind racing with questions. You reached the lobby, the plush carpet soft underfoot, and approached the receptionist desk, where a young woman sat typing on her computer.
“Excuse me,” you said quietly, your voice still raw from the sleep. The receptionist looked up, offering a warm smile. “Can I help you?”
You hesitated for a moment, still trying to gather your thoughts. “I
 I woke up here, and I’m not sure how I got here. Can you tell me what happened?”
The receptionist took a moment to study you, her gaze flicking to the key card in your hand. “Oh, I see. You were brought in this morning. A man dropped you off though he didn’t stay long. Just
 dropped you off and left.”
You frowned, the confusion deepening. "Did you see his face?"
She shook her head, her expression apologetic. "No, he was wearing a hood. I couldn’t see anything and he didn’t say much.”
You sighed out a breath, feeling a strange mix of relief and frustration. Relief, because at least you weren’t in immediate danger, and frustration because you still had no answers.
“Thank you,” you said, forcing a smile as you handed back the key card.
The receptionist nodded sympathetically as you turned and walked out.
--
The days that followed felt like a blur of events, each one blending into the next. The shock of the robbery and the kidnapping seemed to hang over you like a cloud, the adrenaline of the event never fully disappearing.
The police had been persistent, asking you question after question, trying to get every detail you could remember. You recounted everything—what you saw, what you heard, how the robbers acted, how you ended up in the hotel.
But what unsettled you the most was the fact that the place they had taken you to—the hidden basement, the garage, everything—was now completely empty. The police had searched the location, but there was nothing. No traces and no leftover evidence. It was as if the robbers had vanished into thin air.
And when they tried to trace the hotel, it was the same story. The receptionist’s memory was all they had, and that wasn’t much to go on. A hooded man had dropped you off. No name. No face. Nothing.
The police had no leads, and you were left with nothing but your own confusion and growing fear.
You tried to keep going. You tried to move on, to get back to some semblance of normalcy, but the feeling that had surged through you—danger, uncertainty, that rush of adrenaline—was a hard thing to shake.
You’d always thought you wanted something more, something thrilling. But now that you had experienced it, now that you had tasted that kind of danger, it felt like an itch you couldn’t scratch. It wasn’t something you could walk away from. It was always there.
You went back to your work, your life, doing your best to keep your routine in place. But nothing felt quite the same. It was like you were constantly looking over your shoulder, waiting for something to happen, waiting for those men to reappear.
Some nights, the fear crept back in, and you’d find yourself unable to sleep, lying awake in bed, the images of the action flashing through your mind. And then there were those moments, when the rush, the thrill, would start to creep in too. You’d catch yourself staring out a window, lost in thought, wondering what it would be like to see one of them again.
It was dangerous, you knew. But it felt impossible to escape that feeling. Something about it was
 addictive.
--
The morning sunlight filtered through your window, casting a warm glow over your apartment, but as you opened the door, the peaceful atmosphere quickly shifted. There, lying on the floor just outside your door, was a bag—an expensive-looking, high-end designer bag, its sleek material catching the light.
You tilted your head in confusion, wondering who could have left it there. Your heart skipped a beat as you crouched down and zipped it open. Your breath caught in your throat when you saw what was inside.
A piece of paper was folded neatly, the words scrawled in neat, precise handwriting: "Wear it for me."
The signature beneath the words read: Wolf.
A chill ran through you, but the bag was filled with more than just a note. Inside, you found an assortment of beautifully crafted jewelry—shiny necklaces, delicate bracelets, and a pair of earrings that sparkled like diamonds. There were also clothes—luxurious fabric, intricate stitching, and garments that screamed wealth.
You felt your stomach tighten, torn between the unease that bubbled up within you and the undeniable curiosity that had you looking over your shoulder. But there was no one in sight. No one watching.
You picked up the bag, feeling the weight of it in your hands. You glanced around the hallway, half-expecting someone to jump out at you. But nothing. No movement, nothing.
Stepping back into your apartment, you closed the door behind you, your mind racing. The room felt stuffy all of a sudden, and your hands trembled slightly as you quickly checked the news, hoping to find something—anything—that could explain this. But there was nothing. No new robberies. No incidents. The police reports hadn’t changed.
You looked at the open bag sitting on the floor in front of you. The glint of the jewelry, sparkling almost like it was teasing you. Each piece seemed to tempt you, daring you to pick it up, to try it on.
Your fingers hovered over the contents of the bag before you quickly pulled them back, shaking your head. This is ridiculous, you told yourself. It wasn’t safe, wasn’t normal. You didn’t know the Wolf’s intentions—what this gesture even meant.
You clenched your fists, forcing yourself to pull back. "No," you muttered under your breath. Whatever game the Wolf was playing, you weren’t going to be part of it.
Leaving the bag on the floor where it was, you grabbed your coat, slipped on your shoes, and headed for the door. You needed to get out, clear your head, put some distance between you and whatever this was.
--
The sun had long since dipped below the horizon, as you decided to take a stroll, hoping the fresh air would clear your mind.
Walking, your steps slowed in front of a jewelry store. The display window sparkled under the bright lights, showcasing an array of necklaces, rings, and bracelets. The pieces were beautiful, elegant, and impossibly expensive.
Lost in your thoughts, you didn’t hear the faint sound of footsteps behind you until a low, familiar voice broke through the quiet.
“Do you like what you’re seeing?”
You froze for a moment before turning your head slightly, glancing over your shoulder. Your breath caught when you saw him—the handsome man you had crashed into days ago.
For a moment, your mind raced, trying to make sense of his sudden appearance. He was dressed casually, hands tucked into his pockets, an air of confidence around him.
“Yeah,” you said softly, turning back to the window. “They’re beautiful.”
“They’d suit you,” he replied, his tone smooth, yet sincere.
You felt heat rush to your cheeks at his words, your heart giving a traitorous flutter. “Thanks,” you mumbled, looking away from the display and at the ground, trying to compose yourself.
There was a pause before he spoke again, his voice calm but laced with something deeper, something unreadable. “Jewelry like that... it’s meant to make a statement. To say something about the person wearing it.”
You glanced up at him, his gaze fixed on the display for a moment before shifting to meet yours. His eyes held yours, and for a second, you could feel the intensity behind them.
“Maybe,” you said cautiously, your voice barely above a whisper.
A small, knowing smile tugged at the corners of his lips, as though he understood something you didn’t. “You don’t think it’s for you?”
You hesitated, unsure how to answer. “I’m not sure it fits my life right now,” you admitted, thinking about the bag sitting untouched back in your apartment.
His smile grew, but it wasn’t mocking—it was... intrigued. “Maybe you just haven’t stepped into the right life yet.”
Before you could respond, he straightened, taking a step back.
“Think about it,” he said simply, giving you a slight nod before turning and disappearing into the flow of pedestrians on the sidewalk.
You stood there, rooted in place, staring after him as your heart thudded in your chest.
Who was he?
After returning home, you let out a heavy sigh as your eyes landed on the bag still sitting where you’d left it. You crouched down and peeked inside once again, taking in the glimmering jewelry and the luxurious clothes.
Scrunching your nose, you muttered to yourself, What the hell am I supposed to do with this?
You closed the bag with a resigned huff and headed to the bathroom, stripping off your clothes and stepping into the hot shower. You let your mind wander for a moment, trying to make sense of everything.
After drying off and wrapping yourself in a towel, you walked back into your room. Your phone buzzed on the nightstand, drawing your attention. Frowning, you picked it up and unlocked the screen to see a text from an unknown number.
The message made your stomach flip:
"You didn’t like the gift I left this morning?"
Your breath caught. For a moment, you just stared at the screen, your heart racing. You typed a quick reply:
"What do you mean?"
It didn’t take long for the reply to come.
"I didn’t see you wearing the jewels."
You froze, gripping the phone tighter in your hand. It didn’t take a genius to figure out who it was. Your suspicion solidified in your mind as you began typing furiously:
"Wolf?"
There was no denial.
"Out of all the names you could’ve chosen, that’s the one you stick with? I’m flattered."
You huffed in frustration, pacing your room as you typed back.
"Why are you watching me? And why would you even give me this stuff?"
A moment passed before his next reply.
"I bought it out of the goodness of my heart, just for you. Thought you’d appreciate the gesture."
You rolled your eyes, fingers flying over the keyboard.
"With stolen money."
This time, his response took a little longer, but when it came, it sent a chill down your spine.
"You didn’t seem to complain when I kept you safe, sweetheart. Or when I made sure you slept comfortably that night."
You swallowed hard, glaring at the screen as your mind flashed back to that night in the hotel. Despite your frustration, you couldn’t deny the truth in his words. You were alive, and he had been the one to ensure it.
Still, you typed back stubbornly:
"That doesn’t mean I owe you anything."
His reply came quickly, as if he had been waiting for you to say it.
"Oh, sweetheart, this isn’t about owing me. I just wanna spoil you."
You stared at the message, torn between anger, confusion, and an emotion you couldn’t quite place. Your hands trembled slightly as you locked your phone and tossed it onto the bed.
And before you could stop yourself, you grabbed the bag, placing it on the bed. Slowly, you unzipped it and pulled out the clothes first—a sleek designer outfit that felt as expensive as it looked. Next, you took out the jewelry, laying it out piece by piece. Rings, bracelets, earrings, and necklaces all glittered under the dim light of your room.
You swallowed hard as you picked up the outfit and the jewelry, staring at them for a moment. What harm could it do to just try them on?
The thought tugged at your resolve, and before long, you found yourself slipping into the outfit and clasping the jewelry around your neck and wrists. You turned toward the mirror, almost not recognizing yourself.
The person staring back at you looked expensive, untouchable, like someone who had walked out of a magazine.
You tilted your head, running your fingers through your hair. Without thinking, you grabbed your phone, adjusted your pose, and snapped a picture.
Your thumb hovered over the photo for a moment. Should I? The thought sent a thrill of uncertainty through you, but before you could overanalyze, you sent it.
The instant you hit send, regret settled in your stomach like a rock. You thought about deleting it or throwing your phone across the room, but the damage was done.
Not even a minute passed before he replied.
"Knew you’d look good in it."
Your cheeks burned as you stared at the screen. Before you could respond, another message came through.
"You wear it better than I imagined. Stunning."
The compliment sent your heart racing. You quickly typed a response:
"You’re a psycho, you know that?"
This time, the reply was almost instant.
"Maybe. But I know a good investment when I see one."
You frowned, typing quickly.
"I’m not an investment."
His response came slower this time, but it hit harder than you expected.
"You are to me. Whether you see it or not."
Your stomach churned, and before you could come up with a reply, another message came through.
"Enjoy the gifts, sweetheart. There’s more to come."
You tossed your phone onto the bed, staring at yourself in the mirror again. You felt beautiful, sure, but at what cost?
The days that followed after felt surreal, like stepping into a life that wasn’t your own. Every morning, you would find another bag or box outside your door. Each time, the gifts inside grew more extravagant—more jewelry, designer clothes, expensive shoes, even a high-end purse that you’d only ever dreamed of owning.
The Wolf never let you ignore his generosity. His messages always followed soon after, asking if you liked what he’d left and reminding you to send proof that you were wearing them.
At first, you resisted, replying with excuses about being too busy or not wanting to wear such obvious luxury items. But he was persistent, and there was always an underlying threat hidden behind his charming words. Not explicit, but enough to remind you that he was watching.
"Don’t keep me waiting, sweetheart." "I just want to see you shine." "Humor me, or should I drop by and see for myself?"
So, reluctantly, you complied. You’d slip into the outfits, put on the jewelry, and snap a picture. At first, you tried to make it obvious that you weren’t enjoying it—standing stiffly, giving half-hearted smiles. But over time, as you caught glimpses of yourself in the mirror, you couldn’t deny that the attention made you feel
 special.
And when you were out, you started wearing some of the items—not all at once, but enough to feel their weight on you. The Wolf noticed immediately, always commenting when he saw you through his texts.
"Everyone’s staring at you, aren’t they? They should. You’re breathtaking." "You belong in things like this, not the life you’re trying to hold onto."
But the feeling didn’t come without guilt. Each time you put on something he sent, you couldn’t shake the thought of how he got the money to pay for it. You knew it was stolen, yet here you were, parading around in the spoils of his crimes.
As you sat on a bench in the park that evening, sipping a coffee and scrolling through your phone, a message from him lit up your screen:
"You’re starting to enjoy it, aren’t you?"
Your fingers flew across the screen as you typed out a response.
"Enjoy it? What, being spoiled by stolen money and manipulated into wearing it? No thanks."
The reply came almost instantly, like he’d been waiting for you to bite.
"Sweetheart, if you really hated it, you wouldn’t be wearing my gifts right now. Don’t lie to me."
You clenched your jaw, glaring at the screen. You could practically hear the smug tone in his voice.
"I wear them because you keep pushing, not because I like them."
It was a weak excuse, and you knew it. So did he.
"Sure you don’t," he replied, adding a winking emoji. "That’s why you’ve been strutting around town looking like you own the place. Don’t think I haven’t noticed the extra confidence."
You rolled your eyes, fingers moving quickly.
"Confidence? More like stress from worrying you’re watching me all the time. Maybe I should toss this stuff out and be done with it."
There was a pause this time, long enough that you thought you might’ve finally gotten under his skin. Then your phone buzzed again.
"You wouldn’t dare. And even if you tried, I’d just buy you more. You deserve to look like the Queen you are."
Your cheeks burned, and you hated the way your heart skipped at his words. "Stop calling me things like that."
"Why? You don’t like being called my Queen? Or would you prefer ‘baby’? ‘sweetheart? ‘angel’?"
You huffed aloud, typing furiously.
"I’d prefer if you left me alone, actually."
"Hmm, yeah, that’s not happening."
You groaned in frustration, leaning back against the bench as his next message appeared.
"C’mon, don’t be mad, sweetheart. You’re cute when you’re flustered."
"You’re insufferable."
"And yet, you keep replying. Admit it—you like our little chats."
You hesitated, glaring at the screen. Part of you wanted to ignore him, to block his number and try to move on with your life. But another part—the one that felt a flicker of excitement each time his name popped up—kept you typing.
"I reply because you won’t leave me alone," you shot back.
"Mmhmm, keep telling yourself that. You’ve got my number saved by now, don’t you?"
Your stomach flipped, and your face burned. You hadn’t saved his number, but the thought that he’d guessed something so ridiculous still made you squirm.
"In your dreams," you typed.
"Oh, sweetheart, you don’t want to know what I dream about."
Your jaw dropped, heat rushing to your cheeks as you stared at the text before locking your phone, you shoved it into your bag with an annoyed groan. He was impossible, and he knew exactly how to get under your skin.
--
The bell above the jewelry store door jingled softly as you stepped inside, greeted by the glimmer of diamonds and gold under bright display lights. The store wasn’t too crowded—just a few customers browsing quietly, the sound of soft music humming in the background.
You wandered toward the ring section, humming to yourself as you peered through the glass. Your fingers brushed over the edge of the counter as you admired the delicate pieces—sleek bands, intricate designs, and stones that sparkled.
One caught your eye: a simple silver ring with a small diamond. The kind of thing you’d never buy for yourself, but it didn’t stop you from slipping it onto your finger to admire it.
The moment felt normal.
But that didn`t seem to last.
The sound of a door slamming open behind you shattered the calm. A sharp, angry voice boomed through the store, cutting through the soft music.
"Everyone on the ground! Now!"
Your stomach twisted as you froze in place, the ring still halfway on your finger. Panic set in as the store erupted into chaos—gasps, screams, and the clatter of someone dropping their bag as people scrambled to the floor.
Your head turned slowly, heart hammering in your chest.
And there they were.
The same robbers from the bank. The masks. The guns. It was like a nightmare replaying itself, except this time you weren’t just a bystander.
Your gaze locked onto him.
The Wolf.
You couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe.
Behind the mask, his head tilted slightly, as if he were sizing you up, and even without seeing his face, you knew he recognized you.
You swallowed hard, your hands trembling as you raised them slowly, your mind screaming at you to do something, anything. But he wasn’t moving, and the longer he stared, the more you began to feel like his prey.
Then, finally, he spoke. His voice was low, distorted slightly by the mask but unmistakably calm.
"You really do have a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, don’t you?"
The familiarity in his tone sent a shiver down your spine. You took a shaky step back, but his gun followed the movement.
“Stay right there,” he ordered, and his voice wasn’t as calm this time. It was sharp and commanding.
You dropped back to the floor, your knees hitting the cold tiles as the others watched silently.
"Good girl," he muttered, almost to himself, and though the words weren’t loud, they hit you like a brick.
This wasn’t a coincidence. It couldn’t be.
The Clown let out a loud, exaggerated laugh as his gaze landed on you, his gun resting on his shoulder. "Well, well, look who it is! Isn’t this just too good to be true?" he teased, gesturing wildly toward you with his free hand.
You stiffened, keeping your eyes down as the other robbers turned their attention to you, their movements briefly faltering.
"Seriously?" the Clown continued, leaning against one of the display cases. "Out of all the jewelry stores in the city, you walk into this one? What are the odds?"
"Focus," the Wolf snapped, his voice sharp as he shoved a handful of necklaces into a bag. But his tone wasn’t as steady as it usually was—there was something strained about it.
A skeleton, standing by the door, glanced between you and the Clown. "What, you two know her?"
The Clown chuckled, his laughter high-pitched and mocking. "Oh, we know her, all right. She’s like our little good-luck charm. Wherever she goes, we hit the jackpot!"
You felt your stomach twist, the heat of their stares making your skin crawl. You tried to stay still, tried not to draw any more attention to yourself, but the Clown’s taunting made that impossible.
"You’ve got to admit," the Clown continued, his tone dripping with amusement as he gestured to the Wolf, "this is kind of funny."
The Wolf didn’t answer, his focus locked on the bags of jewelry as if ignoring the conversation altogether.
Then, before anyone could say another word, a loud pop shattered the air.
The glass window near the front of the store exploded inward, and a thick cloud of gas began pouring in. The cops had arrived.
Chaos erupted instantly.
"Gas!" the Demon shouted, covering his face with one arm.
The Clown cursed, dropping the rings he was counting and grabbing his gun. "We’ve got company!"
The gas spread quickly, making your eyes water and your throat burn. You coughed, trying to crawl toward the counter for some kind of cover, but you didn’t make it far.
Rough hands grabbed you by the arm, yanking you upright. You barely had time to scream before the Demon’s arm was around your neck, dragging you backward toward the exit.
"Shield!" he barked, his voice muffled.
"No!" you gasped, struggling against his grip, but he only tightened his hold, keeping your body in front of his as the store filled with smoke.
The Wolf turned sharply, his eyes—or rather, his mask—locking onto you. "Demon, leave her!"
"No time for this!" the Demon snapped back, holding you tighter as you kicked against him. "You want us to get out or not?"
The Clown was already firing shots through the gas, laughing like a maniac as the police closed in.
Your heart raced as you were dragged toward the back, your screams barely audible over the chaos. The Wolf hesitated for a moment, his gun raised, before letting out a growl of frustration and motioning for the others to move.
"Go! Go!" he barked, his voice laced with anger.
You were shoved through the back door and into an alley, the cold air hitting your face as the sounds of gunfire echoed behind you. The Demon didn’t loosen his grip, dragging you toward a waiting van parked at the end of the alley.
"Let me go!" you screamed, your voice hoarse, but your words fell on deaf ears.
The Clown opened the back doors of the van, waving the others inside. "C’mon, c’mon! Time to disappear again!"
The Demon shoved you forward, and you stumbled into the van, your wrists hitting the cold metal floor. The Clown climbed in behind you, pulling the doors shut as the Wolf took the driver’s seat.
The van roared to life, screeching away from the alley as the cops’ shouts faded into the distance.
You curled yourself further into the corner, trying to make yourself small, your heart pounding so hard it hurt. And then, out of the corner of your eye, you noticed something—or rather, someone.
Another woman.
She was sitting on the opposite side of the van, her face pale, her hair disheveled, and her body trembling. You recognized her from the store. She’d been near the necklace displays, standing by herself. You’d barely noticed her in the chaos, but now it was clear—she’d been taken, too.
Her eyes met yours, wide and terrified, and for a moment, neither of you said anything.
The Clown, seated on one of the metal benches along the wall, noticed the direction of your gaze and snickered. "Ah, don’t worry," he said, waving his hand lazily. "She’s just along for the ride, like you."
"Why?" you croaked, your voice barely above a whisper.
The Clown tilted his head as if you’d just asked the stupidest question in the world. "Because she was there, obviously."
The woman flinched at his casual tone, her hands clutching the fabric of her skirt as she looked between you and the Clown.
"Let us go," you said, the words stumbling out of your mouth before you could stop them. Your voice shook, but you forced yourself to continue. "You don’t need us. We—we’re just witnesses. You got what you wanted—"
"Shut it," the Demon snapped, cutting you off. He was leaning against the side of the van, his arms crossed, the mask over his face making him look even more menacing. "We’re not letting anyone go until we’re in the clear."
You clenched your fists, anger flickering beneath the fear. "This is insane—"
"Insane?" The Clown laughed, leaning forward slightly. "Sweetheart, you don’t even know the half of it."
The Wolf’s voice cut through the tension from the driver’s seat, calm but firm. "Enough."
The Clown rolled his eyes but leaned back, stretching his arms out like he didn’t have a care in the world.
The van hit a bump, and you winced, grabbing the wall to steady yourself. The woman across from you whimpered softly, her eyes darting toward the doors as if she were contemplating throwing herself out.
"Don’t even think about it," the Demon muttered, noticing her gaze.
The van fell into an uneasy silence, the only sounds the hum of the engine and the occasional squeal of the tires as the Wolf took another sharp turn.
You looked at the woman again, and this time you spoke softly, trying to keep your voice steady. "Are you okay?"
She blinked at you, her lips trembling. "I—I don’t know," she whispered.
You nodded, your throat tightening. You didn’t know what to say. What could you say? Both of you were trapped, at the mercy of masked criminals who seemed to thrive on chaos.
The Clown glanced between you and the woman, a grin audible in his voice even if you couldn’t see his face. "Don’t worry, ladies. We’re taking real good care of you."
You glared at him, your fear momentarily eclipsed by anger. "Care? You call this care?"
The Clown laughed again, but the Wolf interrupted sharply.
"Clown, I said enough."
The Clown huffed, leaning back in his seat. "Fine, fine. Killjoy."
As the van turned into what felt like another narrow alley, you clenched your fists tighter, your nails digging into your palms. The woman across from you mirrored your fear, her wide eyes glistening with unshed tears.
Shouts and sirens blared behind you, the chaos reaching a deafening crescendo.
“They’re right on us!” the Clown shouted, gripping the edge of his seat as he leaned toward the back doors, peering through the small window. “There’s three cars chasing—no, four!”
The Demon growled, raising his gun to return fire out the back. Bullets shattered the van’s rear window, glass flying everywhere. You ducked instinctively, covering your head, your ears ringing from the deafening blasts.
The woman next to you screamed, clutching the bench for dear life, her face pale as a ghost.
"Keep them off us!" the Wolf barked from the driver’s seat, his voice sharp and unyielding as he yanked the van into a hard drift around a corner. The tires screeched again, the force slamming you into the wall of the van.
The Skeleton, who’d been silent the entire ride, crouched near the back doors with a rifle in hand. "I’ve got it!" he shouted, leaning out of the broken window to aim at the pursuing cop cars. He fired several rounds, the recoil kicking against his shoulder.
A loud bang followed as one of the police cars spun out, crashing into a parked vehicle.
“That’s one down!” the Skeleton yelled, a hint of triumph in his voice.
But his victory was short-lived.
Another pop of gunfire came from behind, and before you could process what had happened, the Skeleton froze, his body jerking forward violently. Blood sprayed against the inside of the van as he dropped his rifle, clutching his chest.
“No!” the Clown shouted, scrambling toward him.
The Skeleton gasped for air, his body trembling as he collapsed onto the floor of the van.
"Dammit!" the Demon hissed, grabbing the fallen rifle and firing blindly out the back. "They got him!"
You couldn’t take your eyes off the Skeleton’s body. This wasn’t just some action movie or heist drama. Someone had just died right in front of you.
The Clown muttered a string of curses, shaking Skeleton’s shoulder as if trying to wake him up. "Come on, man. Not now. Not like this."
But it was no use. He was gone.
The woman beside you sobbed quietly, her face buried in her hands. You wanted to comfort her, to say something, but no words came.
The Wolf’s voice cut through the chaos like a blade. "Demon, take the rifle and keep them back. Clown, sit down. He’s gone. We can’t stop now."
The Clown hesitated, his body trembling with barely contained anger, but he finally obeyed, slamming his fist against the metal wall before sitting back.
The Demon took Skeleton’s place at the broken window, firing round after round at the remaining cop cars.
The van swerved again, throwing you against the side. Your head slammed into the metal with a dull thud, and your vision blurred for a moment.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the gunfire stopped altogether. The van jolted to a halt in what seemed like another underground garage, and for a moment, everything was silent except for the sound of your own ragged breathing.
The Wolf killed the engine, his hands still gripping the wheel tightly.
The Clown was the first to speak, his voice hollow. “We lost him.”
No one responded.
What the hell had you gotten yourself into?
The Demon barked orders as they moved quickly, unloading bags of cash and weapons from the van and transferring them to a sleek black SUV parked nearby. Every move they made was quick and calculated, their boots echoing loudly in the underground garage.
You and the woman stood there, side by side, both of you trembling for different reasons. Her fear was evident in the way she kept shaking, her eyes darting everywhere like she was looking for a way out. You, on the other hand, were frozen in silent fury, your body stiff as you glared daggers at the Clown, who stood a few feet away, his gun trained lazily in your direction.
“Man, this was a mess,” the Clown said casually, his tone far too relaxed given the situation. He tilted his head toward you, his painted mask cocked like he was grinning beneath it. "But hey, look on the bright side—at least you got to hang out with us again. Bet you missed us, huh?"
You didn’t respond, your glare sharp enough to cut glass.
He laughed, as if your silence only amused him. "Still giving me the silent treatment? You know, you’re gonna hurt my feelings if you keep this up."
Beside you, the woman whimpered softly, clearly unable to handle the Clown’s twisted sense of humor. He turned his attention to her next, his voice mockingly sweet.
“Aw, don’t cry, lady. We’re not all bad. Well...” He chuckled. “Most of us aren’t great, but at least I’m entertaining, right?”
The woman shook her head, her lips quivering as tears spilled down her cheeks.
“Leave her alone,” you snapped, unable to stay quiet any longer.
The Clown turned back to you, tilting his head again. “There she is! Knew you couldn’t keep quiet forever.”
“Shut up,” you bit out, your voice low and venomous.
He let out a mock gasp, pressing a hand to his chest. "So cold! You really do know how to break a guy’s heart."
The Demon’s voice cut through the tension like a blade. “Clown, enough.”
The Clown shrugged, stepping back slightly but still keeping the gun pointed at you and the woman. "Fine, fine. No fun allowed."
After a few more tense minutes, the Demon slammed the trunk of the SUV shut, signaling that they were done loading.
The Wolf glanced over at you as he walked toward the driver’s side door. His gaze lingered for a moment, and though his mask obscured his expression, there was something unreadable in his posture.
“Let’s go,” he said, his voice calm but firm.
The Clown smirked, giving you a two-fingered salute before backing toward the SUV. “Well, ladies, it’s been real. Don’t miss us too much, okay?”
The woman let out a quiet sob, and you clenched your fists, your nails digging into your palms as you fought the urge to say something—anything—that might provoke them further.
The Clown climbed into the backseat, leaning out the window one last time as the SUV started up.
“Oh, and one more thing...” He leaned out of the window dramatically, throwing a mocking kiss in your direction. "Mwah!"
You glared at him, your jaw tightening, but you didn’t respond.
For a few moments, everything was silent except for the distant hum of the SUV’s engine fading into the distance.
The woman collapsed to her knees beside you, her body wracked with sobs. You stood there, your fists still clenched, your chest heaving as you tried to process what had just happened.
--
The flashing red and blue lights of the police cars reflected off the damp pavement as the cops swarmed the abandoned van where you and the woman had been left. You watched in silence as the officers questioned her, her voice trembling as she spilled everything she could recall about the robbery.
After hours of questioning and paperwork, they finally let you go. Exhausted, you dragged yourself home. The weight of the day pressed heavily on your shoulders, but even as you sank into your couch, staring blankly at the TV screen, the adrenaline from the encounter still buzzed faintly beneath your skin.
You tried distracting yourself with a movie, flipping through channels until you landed on something familiar.
Then, your phone buzzed.
The sound made you jump, when you reached for your phone and saw the notification, your breath caught in your throat.
It was him.
"Miss me yet?"
Your heart skipped a beat. You stared at the message, unsure how to respond—or if you even should. Your fingers hovered over the screen, torn between ignoring him and diving into a conversation you knew you shouldn’t be having.
Before you could think too hard, another message came through.
"You didn’t tell them about me, did you? Good."
You sat up straighter, your pulse quickening.
"How do you know I didn’t?"
The three little dots indicating he was typing appeared immediately.
"Let’s just say I have my ways."
You frowned, your fingers tightening around your phone.
"Why are you messaging me? What do you want?"
There was a pause before his next message.
"Thought I’d check in."
Your lips parted in disbelief. Was he serious?
"You can’t just ‘check in’ like this. You’re a criminal."
He answered right after.
"And yet, here you are, replying to me."
Curiosity finally got the better of you.
"I have a question."
The reply came faster than you expected.
"Ask away, doll."
"All the stuff you’ve given me
 the jewelry, the clothes, everything. Did you really buy it? Or was it all stolen?"
You waited, biting your lip, half-expecting him to dodge the question. But then your phone buzzed again.
"Bought. Every single piece. You deserve the best, not leftovers from a heist."
His words made your stomach twist in a way you didn’t want to admit. But still, you weren’t convinced.
"I don’t trust you."
"I know. That’s fair. What would it take for you to trust me?"
You hesitated, your fingers hovering over the keyboard. Part of you didn’t even want to respond, but the absurdity of it all made you type before you could think twice.
"A mirror picture."
You sent it jokingly.
"Like the ones I’ve been sending to you."
There was a long pause, and you were about to type again when your phone buzzed. A photo popped up in your chat, and you froze.
Wow...
He was sitting on the edge of a bed, facing a mirror. Black pants hugged his legs, and a simple white shirt clung to his broad shoulders. Silver jewelry adorned his wrists and fingers, glinting under the soft light of the room. A chunky chain rested around his neck.
But his face was hidden—his phone held up in front of it, the sleek black screen obscuring his features.
Your breath hitched as you stared at the image. It was strangely intimate, like you were seeing a side of him he didn’t show anyone else.
"Satisfied?"
You blinked, trying to collect yourself.
"That doesn’t prove anything. Your face is still hidden."
"I didn’t think you’d want to see me yet. You might get hooked."
You rolled your eyes, but your cheeks burned as you typed back.
"You’re so full of yourself."
"And yet, you’re still talking to me."
He had a point, but you refused to give him the satisfaction of admitting it.
"Don’t you have something better to do than bother me?"
"Not really. You’re the most interesting thing in my life right now."
Your chest tightened at his words, and you quickly changed the subject.
"You didn’t answer my question, though. How do I know the jewels wasn’t stolen?"
"You don’t."
You frowned, unsure if that was meant to be reassuring or not.
"This doesn’t make me trust you."
"That’s fine. I have time to change your mind."
You sighed, leaning back against the couch as you stared at his picture again. There was something about him.. something.
The days after that conversation felt
 different. You didn’t know why you kept responding, but something about his persistence kept pulling you in.
His messages started coming more frequently, each one bolder than the last.
"What are you wearing today?"
You rolled your eyes at that one but still replied.
"I’m wearing jeans and a hoodie."
"Disappointing. I was imagining something more exciting."
"Get your imagination in check."
And then there were the voice memos. The first one caught you completely off guard.
His voice was deep, smooth, with an almost teasing edge to it.
"You’re always so defensive, doll. Relax a little. I’m not trying to hurt you."
The moment you heard it, your cheeks burned. You told yourself it was just the surprise of hearing him—not because his voice sent a shiver down your spine. Absolutely not.
You didn’t reply to that one immediately, hoping he’d leave it at that. But then another one came the next day.
"You didn’t respond to me yesterday. Are you mad, or did I just leave you speechless? Either way, I don’t mind."
Your fingers hovered over your phone, debating whether to reply. You told yourself to ignore it. But curiosity got the better of you again.
"Speechless? Not likely. I just have better things to do."
His reply came quickly, this time another voice memo.
"Better things? Like what? Sitting at home in the hoodie and jeans you wouldn’t let me imagine?"
You groaned but couldn’t stop yourself from laughing under your breath. He was relentless.
And it only got worse—or better, depending on how you looked at it.
One night, as you were scrolling on your phone, a longer voice memo came through. You hesitated before pressing play.
"You know," he began, his tone softer but still carrying that teasing lilt, "you don’t have to keep playing hard to get. I like this game, sure, but I’m patient. I’ve got all the time in the world to win you over."
Your stomach flipped, and you hated how much his words affected you.
"Win me over? You’re delusional."
He sent a message almost immediately.
"Maybe. But I think you’re starting to like it. Admit it, doll."
You didn’t admit anything, of course. But the truth was, you hadn’t stopped thinking about him—not his words, not his voice, not the way he made you feel.
And that terrified you. Because even though you tried to ignore it, you were starting to enjoy the attention. Starting to crave it, even.
But how could you let yourself fall for someone like him? Someone dangerous, mysterious, and so clearly off-limits?
You didn’t know. But what scared you most was that part of you didn’t care anymore.
--
You were crouched in the back of the store, stocking shelves. It had been a quiet day, and you were lost in your routine, mindlessly organizing items when you heard it—a voice that froze you in place.
"You’re really good at this, you know. Stocking shelves. Very meticulous."
Your breath caught in your throat. That voice. That smooth, teasing voice you’d come to recognize through late-night messages and voice memos.
You turned slowly, heart hammering, and there he was. The guy you had crashed into on the street. The same guy who had flustered you outside the jewelry store. But now, seeing him up close, hearing his voice—his voice—everything came crashing down on you like a tidal wave.
It was the Wolf.
Your lips parted, your instinct to scream taking over, but before you could make a sound, his hand clamped over your mouth. His other arm snaked around your waist, pulling you in close.
"Shh, doll," he whispered, his voice low and calm, but there was a hint of steel beneath it. "Let’s not make a scene."
Your heart was pounding so loudly you were sure he could feel it against his chest. You struggled against his hold, your mind racing with panic, anger, and disbelief.
"I knew I’d run into you eventually," he continued, his voice soft but dripping with that familiar smugness. "Though I didn’t expect it to be while you were busy stacking shelves."
You glared at him, your muffled protests pushing against his palm.
"If I let go, are you going to scream?" he asked, tilting his head as if he were genuinely curious.
You nodded furiously, and he chuckled.
"Honest. I like that about you."
You squirmed harder, and finally, he sighed, leaning in closer. His lips were almost brushing your ear now, and his voice dropped to a whisper that sent shivers down your spine.
"Scream if you want, doll. But just know, if you do, I’ll have to leave. And we wouldn’t want that, would we?"
The way he said it wasn’t a threat—it was a promise, one that left you frozen in place. Slowly, he removed his hand from your mouth, watching you intently as if daring you to make a move.
You didn’t scream. You couldn’t.
"That’s my girl," he said with a smirk, his arm still loosely wrapped around your waist.
"What the hell are you doing here?" you hissed, your voice low but trembling.
"Shopping," he replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "And maybe visiting you. Call it multitasking."
You pushed against his chest, breaking free of his hold, and he let you go, though his smirk didn’t falter.
"You’re insane," you spat, taking a step back, your voice rising slightly.
"And yet, here we are," he said, leaning casually against the shelf as if this was all perfectly normal.
You wanted to yell, to shove him out of the store, but all you could do was stare, your mind still reeling. The man who had been sending you messages, giving you gifts, teasing you relentlessly—he wasn’t some untouchable figure. He was here. Right in front of you.
And he was everything you feared he would be. Charming. Dangerous. And completely unapologetic.
You turned away from him, your hands trembling as you grabbed the next item to stock. You focused on the task, willing your racing heart to calm down. Maybe if you ignored him, he’d get bored and leave.
"You’re just going to pretend I’m not here?" His voice was laced with amusement. You didn’t need to turn around to know he was still watching you, his gaze burning into the back of your head. "I didn’t take you for the silent treatment type, doll."
You clenched your jaw, refusing to rise to his bait.
He chuckled softly. "Come on. I get points for effort, don’t I? I’ve been nothing but generous. All those gifts, all those messages... and this is how you treat me?"
You slammed a box of items onto the shelf a little too hard, the sound echoing through the aisle.
"Careful," he said, his tone mocking concern. "You’re going to break something. And then what? Do I have to buy the whole shelf to make it up to you?"
You finally spun around, glaring at him. "What do you want?"
He grinned, clearly enjoying how easily you snapped. "What do I want? That’s a loaded question." He stepped closer, his movements unhurried and deliberate. "But right now? I just want you."
You stared at him, trying to figure out if he was serious—or just messing with you. The way he leaned casually against the shelf, arms crossed, he looked completely at ease, like this was just another day for him.
"You’re insane," you muttered, turning back to your work.
"You’ve said that already," he teased. "It’s starting to sound like a compliment."
You didn’t respond, focusing on stacking the last of the items in the box. He stayed quiet for a moment, and you thought—hoped—he might finally leave.
But of course, he didn’t.
"You know," he started again, "I’ve been picturing this for a while. You, working. Me watching you." His voice dropped slightly, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. "Roles reversed for once."
You threw him a sharp glare over your shoulder. "Do you ever stop talking?"
He smirked. "Only when there’s a good reason to."
You rolled your eyes and turned back to the shelf, but you could feel the heat of his gaze following your every movement.
"You’re cute when you’re mad, by the way," he added. "But you probably already knew that."
You ignored him, determined not to let him get under your skin any more than he already had.
But as much as you hated to admit it, you couldn’t help the way your heart skipped a beat every time he spoke.
You froze as his arm suddenly came up, caging you between the shelf and his body. His other hand rested casually on the edge of the shelf near your head, but there was nothing casual about the way he leaned in, his eyes locked onto yours.
"I’m talking to you, doll," he said, his voice low and teasing. "I don’t like being ignored."
You swallowed hard, glancing around the store, your mind racing. There was no one else in this section—just the two of you.
"What are you doing?" you hissed, trying to keep your voice steady, but your nerves betrayed you.
"Getting your attention," he said simply, tilting his head as his eyes roamed over your face. "Because you’re clearly trying to avoid me, and that’s no fun."
You tried to step back, but the shelf pressed against your spine. He was so close you could feel the heat radiating off him, and the faint scent of his cologne invaded your senses, disorienting you.
"You can’t just—just do this," you stammered, your hands hovering awkwardly at your sides, unsure whether to push him away or keep them where they were.
"Why not?" he asked, his tone infuriatingly calm. His eyes flicked down to your lips for the briefest moment before meeting your gaze again. "It’s not like you’ve told me to stop."
Your mouth opened, but no words came out. He smiled, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you.
"So, here’s the deal," he said, leaning in just a little closer. His voice dropped to a near whisper, sending a shiver down your spine. "I’m asking you out. Right here, right now."
Your eyes widened. "You’re what?"
"You heard me," he said, his smile widening. "Let me take you out. Dinner, drinks, whatever you want."
You blinked at him, your mind scrambling to process his words. Of all the things he could have said, this was the last thing you expected.
"You’re insane," you finally muttered, trying to look anywhere but at him.
"You’ve mentioned that," he replied with a chuckle. "But you didn’t say no."
"No," you said quickly, finally finding your voice.
He raised an eyebrow, clearly unfazed. "Is that your final answer?"
"Yes," you snapped, though it came out weaker than you’d intended.
His smirk didn’t falter. If anything, it grew. "We’ll see about that," he murmured, leaning back slightly, though he didn’t move away entirely. "I’ve got time."
You glared at him, your heart pounding in your chest. "I don’t."
"Then I’ll just have to be quick, won’t I?" he said, his voice dripping with amusement.
Before stepping back entirely, his hand darted out, catching yours in his grip. You tensed, your instinct telling you to pull away, but his hold was firm yet strangely gentle. His thumb brushed over your knuckles, lingering on the ring you’d forgotten you were wearing—the one he had sent in a gift bag just a few days ago.
"Ah," he murmured, his voice low and teasing as he admired it. "You kept it. You do like my gifts, after all."
You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could say anything, he bent down, his lips brushing the back of your hand in a kiss that sent a jolt through your body.
"Perfect fit," he murmured as he straightened, his smirk firmly in place. "Looks even better on you than I imagined."
Your face flushed, a mix of embarrassment and anger. "What is wrong with you?" you hissed, yanking your hand away and cradling it to your chest like it had been burned.
He just chuckled, his gaze never leaving yours as he took a slow step back. "You’ll come around, doll," he said, his confidence maddening.
"Not in a million years," you snapped.
"We’ll see," he said, winking before turning and walking away, his casual stride making it seem like he didn’t have a care in the world.
You stood there for a moment, staring after him, your hand still pressed against your chest.
After that it was relentless. Every time your phone buzzed, you knew it was him. The texts came like clockwork: teasing remarks, flirtatious comments, and, without fail, him asking you out. You rejected him every time, telling him no, reminding him this was never going to happen, but he never seemed fazed.
He started showing up. At first, it was just at your job. He’d stroll in like he owned the place, leaning casually against the counter, that smirk of his permanently etched on his face. He’d make small talk, tease you, and then, inevitably, ask, "Dinner tonight?"
"No," you’d reply sharply, barely sparing him a glance as you went about your work.
"One day, you’ll say yes," he’d say confidently before leaving, and it drove you insane.
Then he escalated.
The first time he showed up outside your school, you almost screamed. You had just stepped out of the building when you saw him leaning against a sleek black car, arms crossed, sunglasses perched on his nose.
"What are you doing here!?" you asked, narrowing your eyes as you stopped a few feet away from him.
"Figured I’d give you a ride home," he said nonchalantly, tilting his head toward the car.
"I don’t need a ride," you said, crossing your arms.
"Didn’t ask if you needed one," he replied smoothly, opening the passenger door with a casual flourish. "Get in."
"No."
He sighed dramatically, removing his sunglasses and looking at you with those piercing eyes of his. "Look, we can stand here all day, or you can get in the car. Your choice, doll."
You glared at him, your stubbornness clashing with his. But as the minutes ticked by and other students started to glance your way, you finally relented with a huff. "Fine."
"Knew you’d see reason," he said with a grin as you climbed into the car.
The bickering didn’t stop there. You told him repeatedly to leave you alone, to stop showing up, but he never listened.
"You’re persistent," you muttered one day as he drove, your arms crossed as you stared out the window.
"I prefer ‘determined,’" he replied with a smirk, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye.
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t deny the small, traitorous part of you that almost looked forward to his appearances. It was maddening, frustrating, and yet
 you didn’t hate it.
--
The late evening air was crisp as you got ready, the faint sound of distant cars humming in the background. You glanced down at yourself, smoothing out the fabric of your outfit—a dress that hugged you just right.
You slipped on your heels, the soft click of them on the ground echoing as you locked the door behind you. Your purse hung over your shoulder, packed with just the essentials.
Your friends’ car was parked at the curb, the music already blaring as the passenger window rolled down. Yuna was in the front seat, leaning out slightly to wave at you with a grin. "Finally! We thought you’d take forever!"
"I’m here, aren’t I?" you teased, walking toward the car and opening the door.
Wonyoung and Chaewon were in the backseat, laughing over something on Wonyoung’s phone. Yuna turned down the music slightly as you climbed in and buckled your seatbelt.
"You look amazing," Chaewon said, eyeing your outfit with approval.
"Agreed!" Wonyoung added, nudging you playfully. "Who’s the lucky guy tonight?"
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped. "It’s not like that. Let’s just have fun, okay?"
The car roared to life as Yuna stepped on the gas, the upbeat music filling the small space once again. The club was about twenty minutes away, and as you looked out the window, the city lights blurred past.
When the car pulled into the parking lot of the club, you stepped out, adjusting your dress and looking up at the bright neon sign that lit up the entrance.
What you didn’t notice was the black car that parked a few rows away. Inside, a familiar figure sat, watching you intently as you laughed with your friends and disappeared into the crowd at the entrance.
The dance floor was crowded, bodies moving to the beat, lights flashing in bursts of color that left you feeling free, untethered.
You swayed to the music, letting yourself get lost in it, your arms lifting as you spun slightly. Everything felt good—better than it had in a long time. Your friends were nearby, dancing and laughing, but at that moment, you were in your own little world.
Until you weren’t.
A hand brushed your waist, and a figure stepped up behind you. At first, you thought nothing of it—people were constantly bumping into each other on the crowded floor. But then you caught it: the sour, musky scent of sweat and stale cologne. It wasn’t pleasant, and it made your nose wrinkle instinctively.
The guy leaned in closer, his presence too heavy, his breath hot against your neck as he tried to match your movements. You froze for a second, then subtly shifted away, putting some distance between you and him without making a scene.
But he followed.
He pressed in again, his hand grazing your arm this time, and you turned to glance at him over your shoulder. He was taller, with an unsettling grin and eyes that were too confident. His intentions were clear, and the sight of him only made your unease grow.
You moved again, this time more deliberately, angling yourself toward your friends. But before you could take another step, the guy grabbed your wrist lightly, leaning down so you could hear him over the music. "Where you going, sweetheart?" he asked, his voice slurred, his grip tightening just enough to make your stomach churn.
Your heart sped up, and you tugged your wrist away, your voice firm but not loud. "I’m not interested."
He didn’t seem to care. "Don’t be like that. I just wanna talk."
You scanned the dance floor, hoping to spot one of your friends, but the crowd felt suffocating now, the lights too bright. Panic bubbled just beneath the surface as the guy moved closer again.
But then, out of nowhere, another presence loomed behind you—larger, steadier. A hand reached out and clasped the guy’s shoulder, pulling him back sharply.
"She said she’s not interested," a familiar voice said.
Your head whipped around, and your stomach dropped. It was him. Standing there in the middle of the club, his jaw tight, his eyes dark and burning with intensity.
The guy holding your wrist scowled, trying to shake his grip off. "What’s it to you, man?"
His smile didn’t reach his eyes. "Everything."
The guy hesitated, clearly weighing his options, but after a tense moment, the guy muttered something under his breath and released your wrist, disappearing into the crowd.
He turned to you, his hand brushing yours as if checking to make sure you were okay. "You alright?" he asked, his voice softer now.
You nodded, though your heart was still racing. "What are you doing here?"
His lips curved into a faint smirk. "What can I say? I like keeping an eye on what’s mine."
Your eyes narrowed, a mix of annoyance and confusion. "I’m not yours."
But he just chuckled, his hand falling away as he took a step back. "Not yet."
He turned to walk into the crowd, leaving you to stand there.
For a split second, everything felt like it was moving too fast, and then, without thinking, you grabbed his arm. The wolf—no, he—stopped in his tracks, his body going stiff for a moment, surprised.
You didn’t care. You were done letting things happen around you without doing something.
You tugged on his sleeve, pulling him back toward you, and he let you. His dark eyes flickered with surprise as he leaned down, close enough for you to feel his breath against your skin. His presence was intense, like a fire you couldn’t step away from, his hands instinctively falling to your waist, holding you steady as if you might fall.
"Where do you think you're going?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, though it was more demanding than you expected.
His grip on you tightened, his body language shifting from the casuality he’d always shown to something a bit more... intimate. "I could ask you the same thing," he replied, his voice low.
You swallowed, your pulse quickening. Something about this, about him being so close, felt like it was pulling you in deeper. You’d been fighting the connection for so long, but now, with his arms around you, the fight felt distant.
“I’m not some... object to control,” you said, but even you could hear the uncertainty in your voice.
His lips curled into a faint, teasing smile, and he leaned even closer, so close you could feel the heat radiating off him. "No, you're not," he murmured, his voice a gentle hum against your ear. "But you like when I take control, don’t you?"
Your breath hitched. It was a question, but he was already certain of the answer. Your hands instinctively moved to his chest, your fingers grazing the fabric of his shirt.
He looked at you for a long beat, his gaze softer now, as if he was studying you. "You really don`t want me to leave?"
You didn't answer right away, but when you did, your words were quiet, raw. "I don't know what I want anymore."
He didn’t let you go, his fingers brushing your hair back gently, his lips ghosting over your temple as he leaned down. "Maybe I can help you figure it out."
You blinked, caught off guard by his sudden tenderness. His touch was so gentle...
“I don’t even know your name,” you murmured, the words slipping out before you could stop them.
He pulled back slightly, his dark eyes meeting yours with a gaze that made everything in the room seem a little less important. There was a flicker of amusement in his expression, “It’s Ni-ki,” he said simply, as if it was the most natural thing in the world to give you that piece of him.
Ni-ki.
You repeated it silently in your mind, the name feeling foreign but familiar, a puzzle piece that somehow fit.
Before you could even process it fully, his hand brushed against your cheek, his thumb gently tracing your skin. "Have fun," he added, his voice softer now.
Then, without another word, he leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. Before Ni-ki turned and walked away, disappearing into the crowd.
You touched your forehead where his lips had been, feeling the trace of his kiss burn even though he was already gone.
What had just happened?
Part 2 here
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miffyscakes · 5 days ago
Text
Action Speak Louder Than Words
(nsfw, men + minors dni)
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SYNOPSIS: You had left your ex, Sevika, due to how little she communicated with you. Despite you two no longer being together she often calls you while drunk, hoping to get you back.
WARNINGS: light angst that turns into smut then fluff, toxic lesbian break ups, modern! au, no use of y/n, lesbian yearning, dom! Sevika, sub! reader, smut with plot, afab reader, fingering r!receiving, oral r!receiving
WORD COUNT: 2.1k
A/N: I forgot to post anything yesterday bc I was watching arcane oops
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Ring, ring, ring
You woke up to the sound of your ringtone.
You checked the clock on your bedside table - 3:23 AM. As you took your phone in your hand, you already knew who was calling without you having to look - Sevika. You force your tired eyes open and try to cough the raspiness of your tired voice away before answering.
You never know why you feel the need to answer, or why you haven't blocked her after such a long time. You know you can, but you simply refuse to your best friends' dismay.
There was simply silence on the other side of the phone call.
You laid in bed, waiting for Sevika to speak.
"...Hey" despite saying so little she had managed to slur her words.
You sighed before responding, "hi 'Vika..."
She stayed silent once more; the sounds of clinking and chatter in the background mixed in with her slow breaths that you could hear.
"I didn't know who else to call" she mumbles, words slurring.
You stayed silent, the only sound being heard from Sevika's end was the sound of the fan you had on in the background.
"You could've just not called me y'know," you sighed. Your voice had no tone of anger. Rather, it carried hints of exhaustion and annoyance from the drunk confessions she continuously dropped on you so late at night.
She paused again, the same sounds of clinking, chatter and drinks being poured in the background still being heard by you.
"Is it..." she paused, "... can I come over?" The way she asked made it seem like asking you a question like that hurt her pride.
You didn't answer.
"Sev'..." you sighed, rubbing your eyes awake.
"I don't think that's a good idea" you reply, knowing that if she comes over it'll just turn into a night where you two just argue over nothing. She simply doesn't say anything.
No snarky remark back at you.
No insult.
No nothing.
You both stayed silent for a minute more before you heard the familiar sound of Sevika hanging up.
You sighed as you realized that you were now not tired enough to go back to sleep. As you pulled your covers off of your body, you turned your phone on do not disturb as you just wanted to be left alone.
It had become a cycle now.
She'd go to a bar.
Drink an absurd amount.
Call you to spout some bullshit that she'd never catch herself saying if she were sober.
While you appreciated the sentiments and the words she'd tell you, you knew that she'd never tell you such things if she weren't drunk.
You didn't want a relationship like that.
One where you have to deal with such an emotionally constipated person that can't even bother to say that they love you.
While you knew Sevika was never a woman who used her words to express her love. The lack of assurance pushed you to your decision to leave her.
That, and as well as how aggressive her words became during arguments between you two. While she'd never lay a hand on you, her words always managed to make you feel like your heart had been stabbed countless amounts of times.
You walked towards the kitchen of your apartment, deciding on what late night snack you craved for. However, before you could really decide on what you wanted to snack on, you heard someone knock on your front door.
This caught you off guard due to the fact that it was so late at night.
So who would be visiting you?
You carefully walked towards the door and looked into the peephole. The lights of your corridor were turned off so I couldn't exactly see the face of the person standing there at the front of your door. All you could see was the silhouette of someone who was tall and muscular.
But then that's when it dawned on you as to who it was.
Sevika.
She's never come over like this uninvited. So this was something new within her pattern of late night bar visits that you had become a part of.
You subconsciously open the door. Despite every voice in your head screaming, pleading, at you not to.
There you see her.
She looks the same, but even more exhausted.
There are heavy dark bags underneath her eyes and she's avoiding your gaze.
You both just stand there, silent.
You simply step aside, inviting her to come in.
No matter how aggressively the voices in your head plead for you to kick her out, your heart so badly just wants her here with you.
"...What do you want?" you speak, breaking the silence between you two.
You don't speak with resentment or dismay. Rather, you speak with pure curiosity as to why she has grown so accustomed to calling you repeatedly for so many nights.
You hear Sevika mutter.
While she is no longer slurring her words, you're unable to hear what she's saying due to how quiet she's being. You don't push her to repeat what she said - despite you being curious as to what it was.
She simply just stands there, quiet, jaw clenched.
For a moment you think - or hope - that she'll turn around and leave through your front door. However, she just steps deeper into your apartment - each step being slow and unsure. Her usual demeanour - cold, sharp and snarky - was nowhere to be found tonight.
She speaks, but she doesn't look at you.
"I just don't want to be with anyone else right now..."
It's barely above a whisper, but you're able to hear her.
It catches you by surprise. It's not an apology, nor is it an explanation to everything, but it's honest.
You softly close the door and the click of the door being locked weighs heavy above the high tensioned silence between you two.
"You only show up when you're drunk and falling apart, why?" you question, not to accuse her, but because it's the truth. That's the only version of her that you get to see now.
She sighs, you can hear how shaky her breathing is as she does. Her back is still turned facing you and you don't even know what kind of expression is plastered on her face.
Even if you could see her face it's not like it'd matter much as you could never read her expressions.
"Because that’s the only version of me that lets me come here," she replies. "The rest of me... doesn’t think she deserves it."
Her voice is still barely above a whisper, but it's loud enough for you to hear over the sound of cars on the street next to your apartment.
You don't respond, you simply just blink. You've never expected her to be so honest or open with anything - especially not now.
"Listen, I didn't come here to fight" she finally turns to face you. Her grey eyes lock in with yours, and you two just stare into each other's eyes for a bit.
You stare at her, unsure of what to say.
You don’t know what this is anymore.
Love, maybe. Or something sadder, something quieter, like the last breath of a storm before it dies out.
You watch her, your throat tight, fingers twitching at your sides like they want to reach for her and recoil at the same time. You wonder which part of you would win if you let yourself move first.
She’s still staring at you—no smugness, no challenge, no alcohol-fueled arrogance. Just her, raw and quiet. She sways slightly on her feet, not from the drinks, but from the exhaustion of whatever war she’s been fighting inside herself.
She looks like she wants to say something.
But knowing her, she struggles to do so.
You don't push her as she's already been so honest and open in one night compared to the many months that you and her had been together.
You both continue to just stare, until she suddenly walks closer towards you. Her steps are still soft and unsure - as if she's going to regret whatever it is that she is about to do.
Her rough lips suddenly make contact with yours.
Without warning you feel her metal arm grip at your hair. While her right hand rests on your lower back, pulling you closer to her.
You can’t help but moan as you feel the roughness of her touch on your body and her lips touch yours. You feel her lift you up, placing your thighs on her sides.
She slowly walks towards your room, still carrying you, her lips moving down to place sloppy kisses onto your neck.
She walks through your apartment without even looking; like she’s so used to your apartment that she’s memorized the layout.
You suddenly feel yourself get thrown onto your mattress. The suddenness catching you by surprise.
Before you know it you suddenly feel the cold air graze over your tits as Sevika swiftly removes your shirt. As her lips make sudden contact with your nipples you feel a shiver throughout your body.
While her metal hand is softly massaging your other tit - not wanting to leave it feeling lonely - her right hand is in your panties circling your clit.
You can already feel your panties getting wet and Sevika makes sure to tease you because of it.
“Already so wet for me, hm?” You can hear the smug smirk on her face as she speaks, “you really missed me didn’t you, doll?”
You can barely even process what she says before she abruptly shoves two of her thick fingers inside of you.
The suddenness of her fingers inside of you make you shiver.
While her thumb is slowly circling your clit, her fingers thrust in and out of you.
She stops licking the surroundings of your nipples and creeps up to your neck. She begins to softly bite marks onto your neck; not hard enough to hurt, but hard enough to leave marks.
“Such pretty tits, sweetheart
” she whispers against your neck.
The soft air from her mouth causes for you to whimper against her touch.
While you know that she doesn’t say “I love you” like a person usually would, you know that she always showed her love through her touch. The tenderness, yet roughness, of her touch reminded you of the first night that you two ever fucked.
She swiftly slips in a third finger, the wetness between your thighs acting as a lube for her fingers to slip in so effortlessly.
“Mm
 you look so pretty,” she whispers before pulling her fingers away from your pussy.
You whimper, not wanting her to pull away.
However, you suddenly feel the cold air graze your slicked and wet cunt as she pulls your panties off of you in one fast motion.
You feel her rough lips suddenly make contact with your clit.
She begins to suck softly on your clit. Her tongue swirls around it, before flicking it.
You moan pathetically, melting into her tongue.
Her hands are gripping onto your thighs, pulling your pussy closer towards her tongue.
“Do you like that, baby?” She says, a smug look still stuck on to her face as she slides her tongue inside of your pussy.
As sweat dripped down your body, you nodded pathetically in response to Sevika - despite her question being rhetorical.
“Cum for me, doll
” she whispered as she went back to sucking your clit and stuffing you with her fingers.
Simply hearing her say that was enough to make you let go. You felt your muscles just tense up as you came all over Sevika’s face.
You panted.
Tits going up and down as you recovered.
“We’re not done yet, doll” she snickered.
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You woke up the next morning.
You didn’t want to open your eyes, knowing that Sevika probably wouldn’t be there next to you.
Knowing that she probably left as soon as you fell asleep to escape back to her apartment.
And as you opened your eyes, she wasn’t there next to you.
As disappointment washed over you, you realized that you were clothed.
You also noticed the scent of someone cooking from your kitchen that was beginning filling your apartment.
You took the covers off your body, and walked towards the kitchen. The sun shined brightly through your blinds and into your eyes as you walked into the kitchen.
There, Sevika stood at the stove, cooking.
You noticed your apron was placed on the counter, not folded like you left it originally - which could only mean that Sevika attempted to wear it, only to realize that it was too small for her muscular build.
“G’morning” Sevika said softly, somehow knowing that you were there behind her without even having to look behind her.
“Morning
” you whisper, confused as to why she stayed.
The old Sevika that you knew was never like this.
However, maybe you can give her the second chance that she so desperately begged for all this time.
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taglist: @freakyjorker
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minniesfiles · 4 months ago
Text
BLOOM WITH YOU | month 1
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After years of heartbreak and disappointment, you and your husband’s dream of starting a family seemed out of reach. But miracle was a beautiful thing.
❧ PAIRING; wonwoo x reader
❧ GENRE; angst, fluff, mild smut
❧ WARNINGS; mention of fainting and hospitalisation, mention of past miscarriages, deep talk, mentally and physically drained reader, medical talks
❧ WORDCOUNT; 5.3k
▁▁▁▁▁▁
series masterlist │ masterlist
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𐚁₊âŠč
▍5 JANUARY 2026
Your period was late. In fact your periods were never on time — rather always irregular.
But unlike before, there was no rush of excitement, no flutter in your chest, no anxious anticipation. There was only exhaustion.
It wasn’t a surprise, not anymore. The first time it happened, you felt the thrill, the rush of hope. The second time, that hope turned into nervous excitement. By the third, fourth, fifth and sixth, it became a cruel cycle of expectation and heartbreak.
And now, the seventh time, all you felt was exhaustion.
There was no point in wondering, no reason to let yourself feel anything at all. You had done this before. You had taken tests before — stared at little plastic sticks with trembling fingers, held your breath as you waited for a result, then felt the crushing weight of reality settle in when the inevitable happened.
But Wonwoo never blamed you. Not once, and that was what made it harder. If anything, he loved you more and more.
If he had been angry, if he had shown even a flicker of disappointment, maybe you would have had someone else to direct your frustration toward. But he never did. He never looked at you with anything less than love.
His way of showing that love changed over time. In the beginning, he would whisper reassurances, hold you close, and promise you that there was no rush, that everything would be okay. But when words failed, he turned to actions instead.
Lately, his way of showing love to you was to make love to you.
It wasn’t about trying again or about chasing the dream of a family you had once wanted so badly. It was about reminding you that you were enough, that your worth wasn’t measured by your ability to carry a child.
Not even six miscarriages could make him love you any less. And you wished you could believe that.
The sound of a dramatic OST played in the background as you sat on the sofa, absently stuffing grapes into your mouth. You weren’t really paying attention to the show playing on the screen — it was just white noise, something to fill the silence that had settled into your apartment.
“Don’t you think you should take a test?”
You barely heard the words at first, so immersed in your own thoughts that they barely registered. It wasn’t until the screen in front of you shut off, leaving the room in silence, that your brain caught up.
You blinked at the dark screen.
Saehee stood beside you with the remote still in her hand as she braced herself for a reaction. You knew why. Normally, you would have snapped at her and thrown a pillow at her head, or at least groaned in frustration for interrupting your show.
However, today, you didn’t have the energy. Instead, you exhaled slowly as your shoulders sagged. You didn’t turn to face her.
Saehee didn’t move either. She stood there with her arms crossed, watching you with that concerned look that made you feel both grateful and irritated at the same time.
“I don’t want to take a test,” you admitted with your voice quieter than you intended.
Saehee didn’t respond right away. You knew what she was thinking. She was probably choosing her words carefully, and tried to figure out the best way to talk to you without pushing too hard.
Besides Wonwoo, she was there for you through everything — every loss, every tear, every sleepless night where you had collapsed into her arms because you hadn’t wanted Wonwoo to see you break again. She knew better than anyone how fragile this topic was for you.
“Why not?” she asked eventually.
You swallowed. “Because I already know how this ends.”
“But what if
” she hesitated as her fingers fidgeted in her lap. “What if this time is different?”
“You know what my doctor said, Saehee. My uterus is abnormally shaped, which makes it very difficult for me to carry a pregnancy to full term” you almost snapped.
“And your doctor also said that some women have successfully given birth with the same condition as you. What if this is the one time it actually works out? Wouldn’t you want to know?” she tried to reason.
You stared down at the grape stem in your hand, picking at the tiny ends where the fruit had been. You wanted to believe her. You wanted to cling to the hope she was offering. But hope, you painfully came to learn, was dangerous. Hope had crushed you more times than you could count.
“I can’t go through that again,” you whispered.
“I can’t get my hopes up just to lose another—” you cut yourself off, the lump in your throat making it impossible to finish the sentence.
Saehee walked over and sat down next to you. She reached over and took your hand in hers, squeezing gently. “I know,” she said softly.
“But you deserve to know. Even if it’s scary.”
“You aren’t alone in this Y/n. The medical world today has advanced so much. There’s still options out there that could help your case” she went on to say. You swallowed hard, your gaze still fixed downward. You wished it were that simple.
You remembered the three-page letter that Dr. Jung had sent you two months ago that gave you answers and information you needed. It detailed your condition, which you learned was called ‘Uterine Hypoplasia’, a condition where the uterus is smaller than the average size for a woman’s age.
Reasons? You didn’t exactly know, but Dr. Jung said it could be due to genetic factors, hormonal imbalances or medical conditions. As far as you and your parents were aware, you didn’t have any known or hidden medical conditions.
The other main thing the letter also explained was the treatment options. Although natural conception wasn’t impossible, it could still be quite challenging. But many women with a small uterus have successfully been pregnant and carried their pregnancies to full term with the right medical support.
Dr. Jung laid out the options for you: hormonal therapy, surgical interventions, and assisted reproductive technologies like IVF and IUI. She suggested that, after thorough examination, that you opt for hormonal therapy.
But you had yet to respond to her letter. Wonwoo suggested giving it a try, so did your mother and Saehee. But your hopes were too down in the gutter to even consider it.
╶╶╶╶╶
[19:45 p.m.]
Saehee left two hours ago, leaving you pacing back and forth in the bathroom. Your arms were tightly wrapped around yourself, and you were biting your lip so hard you could almost taste blood.
You made an unknowing promise yourself that you would never do this again.
After the last time — after sitting on the cold bathroom floor, sobbing as you clutched yet another failed pregnancy test — you swore you were done. No more tests. No more waiting. No more hope. Because hope, you painfully came to learn, was dangerous. Hope had crushed you more times than you could count.
But after Saehee pleaded, and also thinking back to Dr. Jung’s letter, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to find out.
And now here you were.
Waiting.
Dreading.
Your hands trembled as you reached up, gathering your hair into a messy bun. Loose strands slipped free, but you ignored them. The exhaustion in your eyes, the way your lips were pressed together in a thin, almost colorless line reflected in the mirror in front of you.
You looked
tired. Not just physically, but deep in your bones.
You took a slow step toward the sink. Then another. Your fingers spread across the cool porcelain and grounded yourself, inhaling deeply.
It was time.
You turned the test over.
Two red lines.
Positive.
The sight of it didn’t send a jolt of shock through you like it used to. There was no rush of excitement, no nervous flutter in your stomach like there used to be. Just a quiet, heavy acceptance.
Of course.
Of course, you were pregnant.
You knew your body well enough to recognise the signs — the fatigue, the nausea, the way your period never came when it was supposed to. You knew before you even took the test.
And yet

Your grip on the sink tightened. You should have felt something.
Happiness? No. Not after everything.
Fear? Maybe. But even that felt dull now.
You exhaled slowly, your gaze locked onto those two little lines, as if staring at them long enough would make them disappear. But they wouldn’t.
Because this was real.
And you knew how it would end.
You lived through it six times already.
Your hand lowered to your stomach, pressing lightly against the fabric of your shirt. There was something growing inside you, once again, something fragile. Something that wasn’t meant to stay.
You squeezed your eyes shut as you forced yourself not to cry.
You wouldn’t do this again. You wouldn’t let yourself fall into the same cycle of false hope and devastation.
You had to protect yourself. From the inevitable heartbreak. From the disappointment in Wonwoo’s eyes. From the way he would still hold you still and whisper that it wasn’t your fault, even though it felt like it was.
You breathed in sharply, forcing yourself to open your eyes. The test was still there. The lines were still there. Nothing had changed.
Except, maybe, the way your heart felt heavier than before.
A lump formed in your throat, but before you could let the tears fall, a familiar voice broke through the heavy silence.
“Honey I’m home!”
Your eyes snapped open. You didn’t know why, but you panicked. Without thinking, you tossed it in the bin beneath the sink. You blinked away the moisture in your eyes and forced yourself to breathe steadily. You had to compose yourself.
With one last glance in the mirror, you smoothed your hands down your shirt and stepped out of the bathroom.
You found Wonwoo in the living room setting down his camera bag by the sofa. His dark eyes lifted and a soft smile spread across his lips as you approached.
“Hey baby,” he greeted as he crossed the room in a few long strides. His hands reached for you and pulled you close by the waist as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips.
You melted instantly and wrapped your arms around his torso. “How was the shoot?” you murmured.
“Long,” Wonwoo exhaled, resting his chin on top of your head. “But good. The couple was sweet, and the venue was beautiful. You would’ve loved it.”
You hummed in response, your fingers absentmindedly tracing small patterns on his back.
“And you?” he asked, pulling back slightly to look at you. “How was your day?”
“Saehee came to visit earlier” you forced a small smile.
Wonwoo’s eyes softened. “That’s nice. Did you two have fun?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, “we just talked and caught up on things.”
It was a partial lie. While you and Saehee indeed talked and caught up on things about life while she was on her business trip to South Africa, Saehee was mainly concerned about you and how you were holding up. In fact she was the one to buy the test after you told her you missed your period.
“That’s good” he hummed.
“Are you hungry? I’m sorry I didn’t cook. If you want I can make something while you shower” you said.
“Hey,” your husband cupped your face, “it’s fine, we’ll just order” he reassured.
“Are you sure? We’ve been having a lot of takeaways lately and I don’t want you to end up having food poisoning” you let out a small giggle.
Wonwoo chuckled as he tucked the strands of hair behind your ear. “This will be the last time, I promise” he said, pecking your lips.
“Shower with me?” he then asked.
You hummed and allowed him to lead you upstairs.
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▍6 JANUARY 2026
It wasn’t usual the way Wonwoo’s phone would blow up non-stop while he was in the middle of a shoot like it was right now. The way the vibration inside the pocket of his denim shorts was constant, he knew it was important.
Wonwoo lowered his camera and stood up from his crouching position. Letting the camera dangle around his neck, he fished for his phone and looked at the screen. There were five missed calls and ten text messages from Seahee, and three missed calls from an unknown number.
His brows knitted in confusion. And in that exact moment, his screen lit up with Saehee’s name.
He looked at the couple with an apologetic look. “Sorry, I have to take this” he notified them, and he was grateful they were understanding.
Turning around and walking out of the studio room, he swiped the green button and pressed the phone to his ear.
“Saehee, what’s wrong?” he asked.
Instead of a response, all he heard was muffled cries from the other end, like she was struggling to form words. Whatever it was, Wonwoo couldn’t help but feel his heart pounding. Like something was wrong.
“Saehee—”
“It’s Y/n” she finally spoke up.
And just like that, his heart dropped.
“S-She collapsed at work.”
Wonwoo couldn’t hear anything. His heart was pounding, and his mind was filled with a deafening noise that chanted your name over and over again. Nothing else even existed at that moment. He needed to get to you. He needed to be by your side.
Nothing else mattered.
Without a word to the couple, who stared at his alarmed expression, he turned on his heel and bolted out of the room. They barely had time to say anything before he was gone, disappearing down the hall in an instant.
His breath was ragged and his heartbeat was as he sprinted through the corridors. The moment he pushed through the doors of the building, the cold air hit him, but he barely felt it. His hands trembled as he reached into his pocket, fingers fumbling for his car keys. It took him two tries to get a grip on them before he yanked open the door and threw himself into the driver’s seat.
Wonwoo had never been a reckless driver. He followed every rule. He stopped at every red light, signaled even when there were no cars around. But right now? Right now, none of that mattered.
The tires screeched as he peeled out of the parking lot, and the speedometer climbed higher and higher. He knew he was going too fast. He knew he was being careless. But nothing — no law, no warning signs, no blaring horns from other drivers — could stop him from getting to you.
Because this wasn’t the first time.
It wasn’t the first time he made this drive with his heart in his throat and hands gripping the wheel so tight his knuckles turned white. It wasn’t the first time he received the dreaded call and the voice on the other end telling him to come to the hospital.
The road ahead became a blur as his vision clouded with tears that threatened to escape. He forced himself to blink them away, clenching his jaw so tightly it ached. His fingers dug into the leather of the steering wheel as his entire body tensed with anxiety.
He hated this. He hated the unexpectedness, and the feeling of helplessness.
He swerved into the hospital parking lot, barely managing to park his car correctly before jumping out. The door slammed shut behind him, but he didn’t even notice. His feet thumped against the ground as his legs carried him forwards before his mind could catch up.
The harsh and overly bright fluorescent lights in the hospital made his head ache. But he ignored the discomfort and headed straight for the reception desk.
“I’m looking for my wife, Jeon Y/n. Where is she?” he demanded, his voice rough and uneven.
The young receptionist, who saw Wonwoo more times than she would like to admit, didn’t even hesitate. Her fingers moved quickly across the keyboard as she pulled up your records.
“Room 717, the radiology department,” she told him, looking up with an expression that was all too familiar — pity.
Wonwoo barely managed to nod in thanks before he took off, his feet moving on autopilot down the hallways as fast as they could. His heart hammered with every step with dread creeping up his spine. He memorised this route. He walked these halls too many times before.
And yet, it never got easier.
When he reached Room 717, he didn’t pause. Didn’t knock. Didn’t hesitate. When he shoved the door open, his breath caught in his throat the moment his eyes laid on you.
You were lying on the hospital bed with the white sheets pulled up to your waist. The sight of the IV drip in your arm made something in him twist painfully. You looked so fragile. Your face was pale and your lips were slightly chapped. But what reassured him — what made his knees almost buckle with relief — was the way your chest rose and fell with each breath.
Dr. Jung was standing in the corner, flipping through her clipboard. She looked up at him and gave him a small smile. “She’s stable,” she said quietly.
Wonwoo exhaled sharply as his fingers ran through his hair. His body, which was running on pure adrenaline, suddenly felt heavy. But he didn’t stop moving.
As he walked towards you, he unhooked the camera from around his neck and set it on the small table beside your bed. His fingers hovered in the air for a moment before he finally reached out, a little hesitant.
His fingertips brushed against your cheek, and the coldness of your skin made his breath hitch. His lips parted, but no words came out. Instead, his eyes burned as he fought the lump in his throat.
And then, as if you felt him, your eyelids fluttered.
Wonwoo stilled, and his heart stopped for a brief second before your gaze finally focused on him. “Hey,” you murmured, a small, weak smile tugging at your lips as you leaned into his touch.
Wonwoo let out a shaky breath, feeling his entire body sagging in relief. “Are you okay? What happened?” his voice was hoarse.
He pulled the chair next to your bed closer and sat down before taking your hand in his. He lifted it to his lips and pressed a soft kiss to your knuckles.
You hesitated as your eyes flickered away for a moment. “I was just coming out of the bathroom
and suddenly, I felt really lightheaded. And yeah
” you trailed off, your fingers curling slightly against his palm.
Wonwoo’s grip on your hand tightened. “You fainted?”
You nodded slowly.
A deep crease formed between his brows. Before he could speak, you interrupted him. “I’m fine now, really,” you said softly, trying to reassure him.
“Just a little tired, that’s all.”
But Wonwoo wasn’t convinced. He heard those words too many times before.
“I told you to stop skipping breakfast,” he scolded. “How many times have I told you?”
You blinked at him before breaking into a small, tired giggle. “You’re so cute when you scold,” you muttered. .
Wonwoo sighed, shaking his head, but he didn’t let go of your hand.
Dr. Jung stepped forward, breaking the silence that settled in the hospital room. “Right, are you ready to go ahead with the scan Y/n?” she asked calmly.
Wonwoo’s brows furrowed immediately. He was so focused on your wellbeing that he didn’t even think to ask what kind of tests they were going to run. His eyes darted between you and the doctor as confusion etched across his face.
“Scan? What scan?” he questioned with a sharp, urgent voice as if he missed something crucial.
You stiffened slightly, and your fingers instinctively tightened around the blanket on your lap. Your eyes travelled towards Wonwoo for a brief second before darting away, avoiding his gaze. The room suddenly felt small and suffocating.
Dr. Jung hesitated, looking at Wonwoo before turning back to you. “Y/n, did you not tell him?”
A lump formed in your throat. You couldn’t find it in yourself to answer.
“Tell me what?” Wonwoo asked, sounding frustrated, but underneath it, it was fear.
Silence hung between the three of you. You looked down at your lap, fiddling with the fabric of the hospital gown between your fingers. You wanted to tell him. You really did. But you couldn’t bring yourself to say the words. Not when you knew the kind of hope it would ignite in his eyes.
Dr. Jung sighed, sensing your reluctance. She turned to Wonwoo, who was now looking more anxious than ever. “She’s four weeks pregnant.”
The words slammed into him like a freight train.“What?” Wonwoo whispered, blinking as if he misheard her.
“You probably know it by now, but at this stage, she’s quite vulnerable,” Dr. Jung continued, keeping her voice measured and clinical. “Her blood pressure was low, which is why she fainted.”
Wonwoo’s heart plummeted to his stomach. His body froze, and for a second, he couldn’t move, not could he breathe. His eyes snapped to you, his lips parting as he struggled to find the right words.
“Y/n?” he called out, his voice soft, hesitant.
Slowly, you lifted your eyes to meet his. The moment your gazes locked, he saw it — the fear, the hesitation, the pain. His heart clenched at the sight.
“You’re pregnant?” he asked. You swallowed hard, then gave him a small nod.
His breath hitched, his chest rising and falling with the force of his emotions. Pregnant. The word echoed in his mind.
He should’ve felt elated. After all, this was something you both wanted for so long. But instead of excitement, all he could feel was the crack in his heart as he noticed the way you weren’t smiling, the way you were bracing yourself as if expecting the worst.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” there was a slight tremor in his voice which betrayed how deeply this affected him.
You exhaled, your shoulders slumping. “I only found out yesterday.”
Wonwoo’s breath hitched.
“Saehee convinced me to take a test when I told her I missed my period,” you admitted, still refusing to meet his gaze.
There was no joy in your voice. No excitement.
Only exhaustion.
Wonwoo’s heart ached. He could see it now. You were too scared to tell him. Too scared to believe in this miracle. Because you were here before — six tims. He was there for all of them. He watched you crumble, grieve, and smile through the pain even when he knew you were breaking inside.
And now, as he looked at you, he realised — this time, you weren’t even letting yourself hope.
“But Wonwoo,” you finally said, your voice quiet and fragile. “What if it doesn’t work out this time too?”
He sucked in a sharp breath.
“What if our baby never gets to make it til the end, like all the other six times?” your voice cracked, and the pain in it shattered his heart into pieces.
“No matter how much I pray, it never ends the way I want it to. So what’s the point when I already know how it’s going to end?”
A single tear slipped down your cheek. You bit your lip, trying to hold back the sob threatening to break free.
Wonwoo couldn’t take it anymore. He stood up, his chair scraping against the floor as he moved to sit beside you on the bed. Without hesitation, he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his chest.
You tensed for a moment before finally melting into his embrace, and your fingers clenched the fabric of his shirt.
“Hey,” he mumbled against your hai. “Don’t do that. Don’t think so negatively.”
You squeezed your eyes shut. “I’m not Wonwoo, I’m being realistic. I’m just so tired.”
His grip tightened. “I know,” he whispered. “I know, baby”
Your body trembled in his hold. “We’ll face this together,” he comforted, leaning back so he could cup your face. His thumbs brushed against your cheeks and wiped away your tears.
“I know you’re scared. I am too. But baby, you’re not alone. I’m right here.”
Your lips quivered. “But I don’t think I can handle losing another one.”
Wonwoo exhaled shakily. “Then we’ll grieve together.” His forehead rested against yours, his eyes filled with nothing but love.
“But for now, let’s hold onto this. Let’s believe in this little life growing inside of you. Please, Y/n.”
You stared at him, his words sinking into your heart. He wasn’t asking you to pretend everything was okay. He wasn’t telling you to ignore your pain.
He was just asking you to try. To hold onto hope — together.
A fresh wave of tears welled up in your eyes, but this time they were softer and less afraid. .
Wonwoo pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Let’s do the scan,” he murmured. You hesitated for only a moment before nodding.
You swallowed hard and your heart pounded against your ribcage as Dr. Jung prepped the machine. This was the moment you were both dreading and anticipating. The moment that would either give you hope or confirm your worst fears.
Wonwoo sat beside you with his firm but gentle grip on your hand. He could feel the slight tremble of your fingers against his own, and he gave them a reassuring squeeze.
“Alright Y/n,” Dr. Jung said softly, offering you a small and encouraging smile. “Let’s take a look, shall we?”
Unable to find your voice, you just nodded.
When the cold gel came in contact with your skin, you shivered slightly. As Dr. Jung pressed the ultrasound probe gently against your abdomen, Wonwoo’s eyes never left the screen. He had been here before, sitting in this exact position, staring at a monitor with bated breath. The memories grazed at the back of his mind. The empty sacs, the weak fetal heartbeats that faded too soon, the silence that followed after each loss.
But this time, he prayed it would be different.
The screen flicked in, and for a few agonising seconds, there was nothing but static. Your fingers tightened around Wonwoo’s, and he could feel the cold sweat on your palm.
Then you both saw it. A tiny, fluttering movement on the screen. A rapid, rhythmic pulsing.
A heartbeat.
Dr. Jung’s smile widened as she adjusted the probe to make the image clearer. “There,” she said softly. “There’s your baby.”
Your free hand flew to your mouth as tears instantly welled in your eyes. Wonwoo felt his own vision blur as he stared at the screen, feeling his heart swelling with a mixture of awe, relief, and overwhelming love.
The small blob on the screen was still so tiny, barely distinguishable, but it was there. And it was alive.
“The heartbeat is strong,” Dr. Jung continued as she adjusted the volume so the rapid thumping sound filled the room. “That’s exactly what we want to see at four weeks.”
Your body sagged in relief, and a sob escaped your lips. Wonwoo reached up and wiped away the tear that slipped down your cheek.
“It’s okay my love,” he whispered. “They’re okay.”
Dr. Jung, however, remained focused as she carefully examined the screen. After a moment, she looked at you with the same kind but serious expression she always wore when discussing your condition.
“Now, I know this is wonderful news, but we need to talk about the next steps.”
The shift in her tone made your heart clench, and Wonwoo’s grip on your hand tightened. “What do you mean?” he asked.
Dr. Jung turned the screen slightly and pointed at the position of the embryo. “Y/n, given your history and your uterine abnormality, we’re going to have to take medical intervention to ensure this pregnancy remains viable.”
Your throat felt dry. You always knew that even if you did conceive again, carrying the baby to full term would be an uphill battle. Your uterus was never a safe environment for a growing fetus, and each miscarriage had been a painful reminder of that.
“Your condition,” Dr. Jung continued gently, “makes it difficult for the embryo to implant securely. There’s a risk of inadequate blood supply, which could lead to complications. Right now, everything looks good, but if we don’t act preemptively, the chances of miscarriage increase significantly.”
You swallowed hard, nodding. “So
what do we do?”
Dr. Jung sighed softly. “There are a few options, but the best course of action would be a combination of hormonal support, regular monitoring, and possibly a cervical cerclage.”
“A cerclage?” Wonwoo’s brows furrowed.
Dr. Jung nodded. “It’s a procedure where we place a stitch in the cervix to help it stay closed and prevent early labor or miscarriage. Given Y/n’s history, her cervix may not be strong enough to hold the pregnancy as it progresses. We wouldn’t do the procedure just yet, but if we see signs of cervical incompetence in the coming weeks, we’ll need to act quickly.”
The words sent a chill down your spine. You read about cerclages before. They were often a last resort, a desperate attempt to keep the baby inside just a little longer. Some women had success with them, but others had not.
Wonwoo felt you stiffen beside him. He turned to you as his eyes searched for yours. “Hey,” he whispered almost as he tilted his head so you would look at him.
“What are you thinking?”
You let out a shaky breath. “I just
I’m scared. I don’t want to go through another loss Wonwoo” your voice cracked.
“I don’t know if I can do it again.”
His heart ached at the vulnerability in your words. He reached up and cupped your face gently. “I know baby,” he whispered. “I know.”
Dr. Jung gave you both a moment before she continued. “We’ll also start you on progesterone supplements immediately. Progesterone is crucial in the early stages of pregnancy to support the uterine lining and help the embryo implant securely.”
You nodded slowly, trying to process everything.
“In addition,” Dr. Jung continued, “we’ll schedule ultrasounds every week to monitor the baby’s growth and the condition of your uterus. If we notice anything concerning, we’ll adjust the treatment plan accordingly.”
Wonwoo turned back to her. “And if we do everything you’re suggesting
what are the chances?” he asked.
Dr. Jung hesitated. “I won’t lie to you,” she admitted.
“There are still risks. But if we’re diligent, and if Y/n’s body responds well to the treatments, the chances of carrying to term increase significantly.”
It wasn’t the guarantee you hoped for, but it was something. A chance. And right now, that was all you could ask for.
You exhaled and glanced at the screen once more. The tiny spark of life continued to beat steadily. Wonwoo leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your temple.
“We’re doing this,” he whispered. “Together.”
You turned to him as your lips quivered. “You still want to try?”
“Of course I do. I want this baby. I want our baby.”
He gave you a look that was filled with so much love and devotion that it made your chest tighten. Tears streamed down your cheeks, but this time, they weren’t just from fear. They were from hope.
Dr. Jung smiled as she sensed the shift between you two. “Then let’s get started.”
She reached for the prescription pad as she got ready to outline the plan that could save your baby’s life. And for the first time in a long time, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe( this time would be different.
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a/n; sorry for the long waitđŸ„č
588 notes · View notes
cutielando · 3 months ago
Text
revolving door | lando norris
synopsis: in which he will do anything to win you back and prove to you he has changed
a/n: based on this request!
pairing: lando norris x ex-girlfriend!reader
my masterlist
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The first time you walked away from Lando Norris, it had been raining.
Fitting, really, because everything about that night had felt like a storm—rushed words, emotions colliding like thunder against lightning, and the eventual crack that split you apart.
“I can’t keep doing this, Lando,” you had said, voice barely above a whisper, but somehow it still cut through the downpour. “I can’t keep being the girl you come back to when it’s convenient.”
Lando hadn’t said much then. Just stared at you with those sea-glass eyes, his lips parting like he wanted to argue but couldn’t find the words.
Maybe he knew you were right. Maybe he was tired of this cycle, too. Maybe he thought you’d come back—just like you always did.
And for a while, you really thought you wouldn’t.
But the thing about revolving doors is that no matter how many times you step out, you always end up back inside.
♡♡♡♡♡
It started again three months later, like it always did.
You had told yourself you were over him, that you were stronger this time, that you wouldn’t let yourself be pulled back into the orbit of Lando Norris.
But then he showed up at your doorstep, soaked from the rain, a bottle of your favorite wine in one hand and a ridiculous, sheepish grin on his face.
“Hey”
Just one word. One stupid, simple word, and suddenly, you were caught in the same cycle all over again.
You let him in. Of course, you let him in.
And it was good—for a little while. It always was. Lando had a way of making you forget why you left in the first place.
He was warm touches and late-night laughter, tangled limbs under white sheets, and the way he looked at you like you were the only thing in the world that made sense.
But then came the other side of the cycle.
The part where he got distant, where racing took priority, where texts went unanswered for days, where you sat in the grandstands watching him but wondering if he ever truly saw you.
And you told yourself you wouldn’t do it again, that you wouldn’t be his revolving door, but God, it was so hard when every time he came back, he made you feel like you were everything.
♡♡♡♡♡
“You’re mad”
You didn’t even bother looking up from your drink.
“What gave it away?”
Lando sighed, sliding into the bar stool next to you. His hand brushed against yours on the counter, a silent attempt at connection, but you pulled away.
“I had a race” he said, like that excused everything. “I had obligations”
You finally turned to face him, your jaw tight.
“And what about me? Do I not count as an obligation? Or am I just something you pick up when it’s convenient?”
His face twisted in frustration. “That’s not fair”
You scoffed.
“No, Lando, what’s not fair is me sitting here, wondering if I’m even a priority to you, while you’re off living your life like I don’t exist”
He ran a hand through his curls, his knee bouncing under the table.
“You know how much this means to me”
“And you know how much it hurts to be treated like an afterthought” you shot back.
For a moment, he didn’t say anything. Just stared at you like he was trying to figure out the right words to keep you from slipping away again.
But you were tired—so damn tired—of always being the one waiting, always being the one to put in the effort.
So, you pushed back your chair and stood up.
“I can’t do this anymore, Lando.”
His eyes widened, panic flashing across his face. “Wait—”
“No,” you cut him off. “I’m done being your revolving door.”
And this time, you meant it.
Right?
♡♡♡♡♡
A month passed. Then two.
And for the first time in a long time, you didn’t look back.
You threw yourself into work, into friends, into anything that kept your mind busy.
You ignored the texts he sent—the I miss you, the I’m sorry, the Can we just talk? Because you knew if you answered, you’d be right back where you started.
But then, one night, you found yourself at a race. Not for him—at least, that’s what you told yourself. You were there with friends, just another face in the crowd.
And yet, somehow, his eyes found yours the second he stepped onto the podium.
You should’ve left. You should’ve walked away before he could find you.
But you didn’t.
You were standing by the paddock entrance when he appeared, still in his race suit, his hair damp with sweat. He looked at you like he wasn’t sure if you were real.
“You came” he breathed.
You folded your arms over your chest.
“I didn.t come here for you. Don’t read into it” you said, trying to keep your emotions at bay.
He took a hesitant step closer, watching your every move and gesture for any sign that you didn't want him closer. But he found none.
“But I want to read into it”
You swallowed hard, willing yourself to stay strong.
“Lando—”
“No, listen,” he interrupted, his voice almost desperate. “I know I’ve screwed up. I know I’ve been selfish. But I swear to God, I never meant to make you feel like you didn’t matter.”
You looked away, because if you met his eyes for too long, you’d break.
“Then why did you?”
He exhaled shakily, looking down at the ground.
“Because I’m an idiot. Because I thought you’d always be there no matter what. And I was wrong”
You bit your lip, your heart pounding.
“And what happens when this cycle starts again?”
His hand found yours—gentle, hesitant. “It won’t. I swear to you, it won't ever happen again”
You wanted to believe him. God, you wanted to. But could you?
Lando squeezed your fingers, as if sensing your doubt.
“I don’t want you to be my revolving door, love. I just want you to be my home”
And maybe, just maybe, this time
 he really meant it.
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