#but she's just kind of accepted it into her normal. things dont go her way. Lol. Lmao. Whatever. right? (<- is probably a little upset)

[binmeister]

Whenever you can or feel like it, can we have more bodyguard stuff? Also, I’m a little confused on how Rumi feels about bodyguard reader. Because it seems like siblings, but at one point, it seemed like she had romantic feelings for him.

I’ll definitely be continuing to write blurbs and scenarios or HCs for the bodyguard stuff, its fun and lets me throw out some creative brain worms

Sorry if this a bit of a ramble but I want to give a like, a bigger and vagueish picture of my thoughta

Cop out answer is just “yknow familiarity into falling in love ezpz” but my personal interpretation of Rumi and Bodyguard! reader is a couple different ones:

Reader has and will only ever view Rumi as a younger sibling due to the familiarity and how he was raised - Rumi feels the same and because they didnt exactly have normal upbringings they mistake the comfort and platonic bond as something more before realising it wasnt actually romantic attraction

Reader is dense as seen in most of my hcs because he hasnt had time to experience these feelings other people get to partake in, Rumi realises as they get older that she has developed romantic feelings for him but he does not reciprocate so she lets the feelings die off (what I personally lean towards as a whole)

And lastly is the potential for mutual romantic attraction and the pair has to figure out how to go about it because they had been raised together and practically as family, though not blood related it still feels more taboo because its not exactly child hood friends given how celine had become her parental figure

Im yapping a lot here but its essentially I think its extremely complex and I dont want to lock in anything right now because its still a relatively fresh characterisation that can be changed up and retconned / i do want to leave some wiggle room for people to interpret things how they would want to see it and im honestly happy to write things in a way that leaves it open

TLDR of my half awake yapathon is that Rumi is conflicted on how she feels, he’s kind of the first and was primarily the only guy in her life until Jinu / the Saja boys come in and he’d accepted her for her well before she could love herself and its confusing especially with everything else going on in her life

I hope this can clear up some things but if it made the confusion worse Im so sorry 😭

[qoldenskies]

i feel like out of everyone april would be the worst with self-deprecating humor. the boys have self-esteem issues but they're literally all the types to play up confidence or double down instead of addressing them (raph the least, but he can be pretty stubborn at times), but april's momentum only takes her so far and she is pretty willing to admit defeat if her usual methods dont work. the speed at which she falls back into the idea that she cant do anything right,,, there's probably a point where she jokes about it before it even happens to prepare herself for disappointment, right?

[cent-scratchnsniff]

it was just going to be a few warmup doodles but then she infected the rest of the page like the ever eternal and spreading spores. hod!!! hod. hod :)

[frobby]

i love madoka magica however i dont think we as a fandom talk enough about how tragic madoka herself is. probably because the narrative itself steers you away from thinking about her personally. shes not a character shes a desire that homura has, shes a force of good, shes homura's foil. but those are all madoka's narrative roles but madoka herself as a person is not really looked at because we are viewing this world from an unreliable narrator(homura) who only sees madoka as those things. The best thing homura could have done for madoka was give up on her, to let her go. because every time we go back in time the image of madoka is distorted, she loses more of herself every regression of homura's as she tries harder and harder to save her. We don't even know what madoka originally wished for to become a magical girl in the original timeline. and she actually acts quite differently than the madoka we meet. shes a lot more honest and caring and bold. by the time homura's has reached the actual anime madoka has been reduced by the sands of time to a figment of herself. she has no wants or desires of her own beyond wanting to do good and help her friends and when all her humanity is stripped away is when she finally acends to godhood because thats all thats left of her. an ideal and a faith in her. madoka kaname died a long time ago and all that is left is her ghost.

[dbphantom]

you know if you guys voted for stretch armstrong i probably would have shut up a lot sooner tonight

[zu-is-here]

To be honest I have been anticipating to post about an OC - I wanted to make a more elaborated introduction to her, but with college and other stuff it is seeming impossible to do it now and i need to get it off my chest (Ari already witnessed the yaps, but some things changed since I talked to her about it)

When the aimel ship children wave started, i cooked one too (didnt post much about her due to the reasons above). Her name is Maud. She comes from a timeline that was corrupted due to unkwown reasons - everyone in there turned into amounts of glitches that dont have conscience and cant be saved, her family included.

She herself lost her arm due to the corruption, but the rest of the body is fine as she was rescued by some dubious scientists that promised to save her family if they got her help with something.

She was victim to many experiments since her 8 years... She was betrayed by them - they wanted to experiment on her, as she has the genes of 4 outcodes and they wanted to...elevate her potential.

Years of suffering pass and Condiment invades the laboratory in order to steal something from the head scientist - apparently, they had some beef before? Maud is forced to fight against him but he convinces her to join him (dude got her information files) and turn her anger against the people who used her.

Nobody gets out alive - her fault :)

Condiment sees potential in her. He brings her to his home and convinces her to join him.

(It is messed up, as she would be what? 14 years old when he suggested it?)

She doesnt recognize herself as the child who first entered the lab, the child who had loving parents and siblings. She is the beast the scientists made of her, she cant deny it, so she will be one.

....

I have been plotting to have her meeting the timeline in which she doesnt originally exists, therefore the family she has been forcing herself to forget and absolutely have a breakdown...especially when at least some of the people there - people from her past - show her kindness.

...now with Maim existing, I wonder how things would go.... I suppose at the time they meet she would be freshly recruited by Condiment, having her doubts about staying with him or not.

I suppose if she ever saw Maim, she would be all kinds of upset (to say the least, but she doesnt tend to show up her emotions anyways), but also terrified - that isnt the father figure she has been trying to forget, but someone new and that helps children in conditions somewhat similar to hers....

She totally wouldnt like....make up a lone mission to steal something from Maim's army's place just to see him how it is. No. Who would even suggest that-

(....im not normal. Sorry for the wall of text. I have been really, REALLY excited to talk about this...i just didnt know how to approach it on a better way because im a silly goose-)

Oh dear... (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

First of all, welcome to the family!!╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

Secondly, thank you so much for sharing this (never late <3) cause now I too have a brainrot on this idea >:D Just imagining their meeting in either of these timelines squeezes my soul... (M)Aim remains an accepting father no matter the situation, but the choice will always be hers ☆

I'll be looking forward to more about her! \(//∇//)\

[empressdede]

Me, U & Jealousy - Chapter Five

Previous Chapter

This story is written in both past and present. Italics is written in the past and regular font is written in the present.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Chapter Five

Sorai and Jada were having a girls night until the boys show up again to ‘babysit’.

“What do you mean you never finish?” Jada asked in almost disbelief and Sorai shrugged her shoulders.

“I just don’t think it’s possible.”

“Oh bitch, it’s very possible. I could confirm that myself. So he’s never made you have an orgasm?”

Sorai shook her head, and she was kind of embarrassed to admit that. “I give it to myself from time to time so I know what it feels like. But Cameron…. I don’t know. Like he’s super excited about it and then he’s going at it and at first it feels good.”

“Okay so when does it stop feeling good?”

“After a while. I don’t know what he does but… and sometimes he sucks too hard so it hurts.” Sorai continued, stopping when she heard Jada scoff.

“Is that why you guys broke up?”

Sorai rolled her eyes. “No. He keeps complaining about the Fatu brothers. Especially about Sefa, he thinks there’s something going on between us.”

Now admittedly, there is some tension between the two of them but they had agreed after the house party they attended two years ago that they would not cross those lines with each other again.

After he took her home, he had kissed her again ‘just one last time’ he had claimed and then agreed to never cross those lines with her again.

But damn was it hard, especially when Sefa started working out for football Junior year. She already didn’t like Monica, but was starting to not to like her even more. She was finding herself more envious of the girl.

Sorai pushed those feelings to the side though because Cameron decided to actively pursue her. So for two years, she’s kept her attention on Cameron.

Her and Cameron were very compatible, he really liked Sorai and loved spending time with her; but whenever he had a chance to really get her alone, her ‘brothers’ were quick to snatch her up. Especially Sefa.

She doesn’t blame Cameron for feeling the way that he does… she felt the tension her damn self. But he was a friend who was almost family. How could she even cross those lines anyways?

Jada rolled her eyes this time, “I thought he said he wasn’t insecure about him? They let everyone know they’re your brothers and he knew that two years ago, why is he acting up like that now?”

“Said things were different from when we were sixteen… I dont know Jada. Every other week he complaining about something.” Sorai shrugged. They’d be back together before she knew it so she wasn’t really stressing it.

“Bitch you better than me, I would’ve broke up with him for the bad head alone. Is the sex even worth it?”

“He almost makes me cum when we have sex; just not when he gives me head. But Cameron said most girls don’t even cum and that it’s normal.”

“Bullshit.” Another person voiced out, causing both girls to snap their heads towards the door. When the fuck did he even get here?

“Do you ever knock?” Sorai asked, squinting her eyes at him.

He shrugged. “Y’all knew I was coming over. And don’t think you slick either, I heard what you said.”

“Ugh, Joseph give it a rest. We’re grown now you know?” Jada responded to defend her friend.

“So grown that I still have to come and watch over you guys when Sorai’s parents leave for the weekend?” He asked sarcastically with a raised eyebrow.

“First of all, my dad asked the twins to pass by and CHECK UP on me. Not babysit. So you’re actually here for no reason.”

“Twins were busy so they sent me. All for me to hear about how Cameron can’t even do his job right.”

Jada couldn’t help but laugh cause she agreed with him. Cameron was misleading her inexperienced friend into thinking those kinds of performances were acceptable and it was not.

Sorai rolled her eyes at her friends, how fuckin mature. “Ha Ha Ha.” She dryly replied before continuing, “I don’t understand what the big deal is anyways, it doesn’t even feel that good”

“Yes it really does. I’m talking about toe curling, body shaking, eyes crossing. Girl it’s literally so good. Do not let that boy lie to you cause he sucks.” Jada scoffed shaking her head. “I could hook you up with somebody who could give you the experience of a lifetime and you can see what you missing.”

“I wish the fuck you would. Piss me off if you want to Jada.” Sefa replied, glaring at her.

“What!? I know a guy who could -“

“No.” He dismissed which caused Sorai to raise her eyebrows at him.

“And since when do you make decisions for me?”

He shrugged, “I don’t. But one word to Joe and it’ll be all of us jumping yo lil friend. Cameron barely got out scott free, he still got one waiting on him too.”

“Sefa that’s not fair, you get to rotate between Monica and whoever else but I can’t get new experience from someone else? Mind you, I’m grown.”

“Mind you, I don’t care. Yo momma left like $20 downstairs so what we getting, pizza or Chinese?”

He had to change the subject, and he didn’t care how obvious it seemed to either of them. Sorai was not linking up with no fuckin random. The thought of it almost pissed him off, he wish Jada would just shut the hell up.

Sorai didn���t need no new experience from nobody. She just needed to sit her lil ass down somewhere before she get somebody else fucked up for no reason.

Sorai rolled her eyes. There was no winning with Sefa, so she let it go.

“I’m sick of pizza, get Chinese.” Jada replied, and Sorai nodded in agreement.

“Orange chicken and white rice with some egg rolls.”

Joseph nodded his head and left her room to go make the order.

Jada was the first one to speak up, smacking her teeth and hitting Sorai on the arm. “You need to tell Joseph that he can’t keep you sheltered forever. Sneaking off all the time gets tired after awhile don’t you think?”

“Even if Sefa wasn’t a problem, the other three would literally kill me. Joe almost took Cameron’s head off for bringing me home late one time.” Sorai explained with a shrug, “They’re the big brothers remember? They just want to look out. I just wish Sefa wouldn’t be so hard on me. We’re literally the same age.”

“Then tell him that!” And Sorai gave her friend a tired sigh in response. They both knew no matter what Sorai told Joseph, he was not going to listen to her. If he didn’t want her doing something, he went out of his way to make sure it didn’t happen.

She thought of it as his way of looking out for her and even though she hates it, it’s nice to know that he cares so much.

But in reality it wasn’t because he cared so much; Its more so the fact that he was selfish. He didn’t know how long he could play pretend with her anymore and he almost didn’t care who knew it.

Joseph barely let her out with Cameron as is and the times that she was with him for longer than he liked; it was because Monica was occupying his time.

And he really hated that damn brother bullshit his brothers had instilled to the whole world. The idea was nice and all but he was not her fucking brother and he did his best to show her that; especially two years ago at Britney’s party.

Sometimes, he swore she would look at him in a different kind of light but then she’d be right back in that stupid boys arms and he’d disregard the thought completely.

Joseph shook his head to focus on what he came downstairs for in the first place.

Meanwhile upstairs, the girls - really it was Jada - tried to come up with a plan on expanding Sorai’s horizons while she was currently single.

"We could see if Matthew got some fine ass homeboys." Jada suggested which made Sorai roll her eyes.

"Just cause they’re fine doesn’t mean they know what they’re doing. We need somebody who got good reviews."

Jada busted out laughing out of nowhere before jokingly stating, "To bad we can’t go to Joseph, do you hear how Monica be bragging? He would’ve been perfect."

Sorai laughed with her friend, shaking her head to make it seem like she was disgusted with the suggestion, but her body littered with goosebumps as she really thought about it. She remembered exactly everything Monica has ever said about Sefa when it came to that. Was he really that good? Curiosity really got the best of her.

Unknowing of the dilemma Jada just sent her best friend through, she continues to suggest another boy with good reviews. "We could hit up TJ, I heard he was really good. Actually, Rose said they hooked up at some party over the summer and he gave her a time to remember."

That piqued Sorai’s interest just a little bit, "How good of a time?"

"Aye man, what the fuck did I just say?" Sefa states as soon as he enters the room.

Jada rolled her eyes, "Joseph, please grow up. Rai grown just like you. You not the only one who wanna have cake and eat it too."

And to be honest, Sorai completely agrees. She was old enough to make her own decisions and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out just who she wanted to cross those lines with. But for now, she decides to change the subject for the sake of both of her friends.

“Can we just forget it and just watch white chicks?”

Jada smacked her lips, glaring at the annoying Samoan, “Look at what you did, you happy now?”

“Jada, can you be serious for even one day in your fucking life?” He retorted back to her.

Sorai rolled her eyes again, “Can y’all not? Let’s just watch a movie and forget about it.”

“ She saved you this time but the next time you work my nerves, me and Rai, jumping you.” Jada threatened which caused Joseph to roll his eyes and ignore her. He didn’t come here to argue, plus it didn’t matter.

He said what he said, and nothing was changing that. So, after putting the DVD into the slot, the group of friends found themselves comfortable in Sarai’s room; the girls on the bed and Joseph on the air mattress until the Chinese food finally came.

“Sefa, go get the food.”

“Why I got to go get the food? It’s your house.” he only argued to be annoying. It didn’t stop Sarai from pouting at the thought of getting out of bed, which caused him to smack his teeth and get up wordlessly.

"Oh shit, tell him to grab the drinks from the kitchen." Jada reminded, which caused Sorai to groan. She forgot about that.

"You think he’ll go back downstairs and get them?" She asked which caused Jada to snort.

Joseph would not make the second trip and they both knew that. Sorai through her head back to let out a loud groan and threw the covers off her body to slide out of the bed. "We have Coke instead of Pepsi, that fine for you?"

Jada nodded her head as a response and snuggled under the covers while Sorai left to go downstairs. A small giggle leaving her lips when she caught Sefa going through the food to ensure everything they ordered was there.

"They forget your eggrolls one time and now look at you." She teased.

"I’m not gonna take that from someone who cried when McDonald’s gave her the wrong meal."

Sorai’s eyes opened wide as a gasp escaped her lips, "I was on my period Sefa; that don’t count." She defends which caused him to laugh and turn around to face her.

"According to you, a lot of things don’t count." he stated with air quotation marks and she knew exactly what he was talking about.

"Don’t do that Sefa, that’s not fair."

"I’m just saying." He replied with a shrug, and Sorai knew it wasn’t fair to dismiss what happened between them at the party two years ago; but the two of them made a promise.

"How was I supposed to tell anybody that-"

"You don’t have to tell nobody nothing but at least when it’s just us, we could be honest with each other. I mean, do you regret it?" he meekly asked, and Sorai couldn’t help but feel guilty, she didn’t think dismissing the event would make him think she regretted it.

"No Sefa, I don’t regret it." She assured to him softly and he flashed her a smile at her honesty.

"If you want me to be honest when it’s just us… I think about it sometimes." She confessed and there it was again.

That thick tension between the two that could barely be cut by a knife. The admission causing butterflies to swarm in her stomach and the conversation she had with Jada reemerged in her head.

"Just sometimes?" He questioned and Sorai shrugged in response.

"Do you think about it?" She meekly asked, and her shyness caused him to chuckle.

"Don’t be nervous Rai."

"I’m not! And answer the question Sefa."

He grabbed her arm to pull her flush against him before he answered quietly, "I always think about it Rai."

Goosebumps littered her skin at his admission, and she searched his eyes to see if she was being dishonest with her. But she couldn’t find anything that gave away that he was being deceitful.

"…sometimes, I want to do it again." and that made Sorai bite her lips.

She thought it was just her who felt like that. She wanted to test the theory of what would happen if she let him know that the feeling was mutual.

"Me too." She whispered out to him and with the same boldness from last time, his arms wounded around her waist and pulled her even closer to press against him. This time, though Sorai was ready.

Sliding her hands up his arms until they both wrapped around his neck and they both leaned in. Unlike last time, he grazed his lips against her to prepare her, but that was all they could do because Jada’s "WHERE THE HELL Y’ALL AT?" from upstairs caused them to break apart.

It reminded them where they were at, and even though in the moment they wanted to succumb to their weakness, they decided to press into those kinds of matters later. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The walk to the locker room was shorter than Sorai really wanted it to be and Jada held her hand the entire way.

“Listen, it’ll be okay. Fake it till you make it okay? And soon as you’re done we can race out of there.” Jada promised and Sorai nodded her head at her best friend. She liked that plan, and it was the only one they could come up with given the last minute heads up.

“Hey, look at me.” Jada softly asked, causing Sorai to turn and look at her. The state of panic did not leave her eyes and albeit Jada had no clue what she was walking into, she refused to let the girl she seen as a sister walk in there like that.

“…Tell me your okay and we can walk in there.”

Sorai shook her head because she wasn’t okay and she is so grateful for Jada being here for her; being so patient with her and letting her collect herself first. She didn’t know what she did to deserve her but God, was she thankful for her.

“It’ll be a big opportunity.” Jada pushes one more time, to maybe steer her mind away from the people at hand and instead to focus on her job. It works.

“If Paul sees this and he likes it then I could get another chance to Interview the main event on Raw instead of smackdown.” Sorai replies, nodding her head at the goal she just placed in her head. Jada kept her eyes on her, watching Sorai calm herself down and steady her breathing.

Sorai squeezed Jada’s hand before whispering out, “I’m okay.”

Then she knocked on the door.

Eddie opened the door, flashing both girls a smile and widening the door to let them in. “Alright, good luck ladies.” The producer stated before locking the door and walking out of the room.

What the fuck just happened? The girls thought to themselves as they took in the setting of the room. There were no cameras, no microphones, just the boys in the room, waiting for her. They just set her up.

“Sorai-“ Joe started but she was quick to cut him off.

“Is my job a joke to you, Roman?” Sorai asked, furrowing her eyebrows at him. The blood in her body starting to boil as she thought about them really setting her up.

But Joe took a step back when the name,‘Roman’ came out of her mouth. She’s calling them their stage names as if he was a stranger and he didn’t know how to feel about that, but he was determined to find out today.

“No Sorai, your job isn’t a joke to us. But you’ve been avoiding us so we didn’t know what else to do.” He answers honesty. They had to go to the extreme for this and even if they didn’t get what they were looking for, Joe made sure that she would have done at least three interviews for the next couple of shows.

“So instead, you have me come here under false circumstances. Instead of pushing myself to get more interviews, I’m here…wasting my time.”

“Baby sis we just want-“ He tried again but Sorai was quick. She had already turned her back to leave, Jada’s hand still linked with hers. Only to stop in her tracks when she finds the twins standing in front of the door.

“No more running Rai, we need to talk.” Joshua stated this time. Sorai’s demeanor was almost breaking and she didn’t want to break down in front of them. They didn’t deserve it.

“Let me out or I’ll scream.” She threatened.

“You can scream but we already warned security if they heard anything coming from this room to ignore it until the show starts.” Jon speaks up with a shrug. “It’s been two months Rai, you’ve had your space.”

Jada, who knew first hand that this could go on forever raised her hand to silence the room. “Okay, listen. Guys do you really think this is necessary?”

“Rai is family and everything can be handle within the family. Kinda hard to do when she keeps running from said family.” Joe speaks up again.

Sorai shook her head, trying to keep her thoughts from making her spiral. “What do you want from me?” She finally asked.

“What happened when we left Rai?” Josh asked, the twins has moved away from the door and walking in front of Sorai so that they could have this conversation properly.

“Nothing happen.” She dismissed with a shrug. “Is that all?”

“No. Rai, please.” Jon pleaded, taking a small step toward her, “we just want to fix it sis.”

“Did someone break your heart?” Joe asked and damn was that question, the stone to make her walls crumble.

Her lips quivered and she shrugged again. “It doesn’t matter.” She croaked out and she could see their shoulders sink in relief.

As if this wasn’t something they did per se.

“Who broke your heart sis?” Jon asked, and the tears she fought so hard to keep back spilled over.

Her eyes scanned the room one more time, making sure to make eye contact with all of them, her eyes on Sefa’s the longest before turning to face Jon again. “You did.” She whispered.

The surprise look on their faces was one to die for. Of course they don’t remember.

“Us?” Joe questioned, eyebrows furrowed in thought. “What did we do?”

“Joe, I don’t want to talk. Please.” Sorai begged, the tears still silently flowing from her eyes. “I know that you want to talk but I’m not ready. If I’m still so important to you, can you respect that?”

“Well, what are we supposed to do Rai? Just sit and let what you said just slide?” Josh spoke up this time.

Sefa couldn’t take it anymore. “Rai.” He called out, bringing the attention to him.

Her heart ached in her chest at the sound of his voice. She turned and faced him, “Sefa, please; I can’t.” She begged and his heart broke but he wanted answers too.

“Rai-“

“You promised Sefa, please.” She cried out and he sighed.

“Let her go.” He told his brothers who immediately began to disagree with him.

“No.” Josh stated

“Man what hell is you talking about?” Jon questioned

But Sefa stood his ground, even if it didn’t make sense to him either. He did it for her.

“She don’t wanna talk; just let her leave. We can’t force her to talk, that ain’t right.”

Jada seemed to agree, grabbing onto Sorai’s hand again to pull her out of the locker room.

If there’s one thing they all knew, it was that Sefa’s save was only temporary. Eventually they were going to seek the truth from her, no matter what it took.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A/N: I’m 50/50 about this chapter. I’m not sure how I feel about it. Tried my hardest to make it better but this is what I got🤣 I hope you guys still enjoy it though cause baby this took forever to make.

Y’all know what I regularly say; Gimme love🥺🫶🏾 And Like, comment and repost if you’d like.

(If you have not been tagged for this story previously and I have tagged you now, it is because you are apart of my official taglist. If you do not want to be tagged in this story, please let me know and I can remove your tag🫶🏾 Thank you)

Tagging the lovelies: @southerngirl41 @reci1996 @skyesthebomb @christinabae @leighla3 @whatdoeseverybodywant @harmshake @yana3sworld @angiedawn02 @theninthwonder @headoftheetable @romansthrone @wrestlingprincess80 @blacst4r @alyyaanna @raya-hunter01 @paigereeder

[jinbeisluffy]

I see so many posts over different social media platforms about sexuality/gender hcs for the strawhats and i want to add in my own two cents because i believe im very correct (but anyone’s opinion is valid so long as it doesnt go against canon coding)

Luffy - the most aroace and trans guy to ever BREATHE. i dont mean aroace in that hes somewhere on the spectrum where he can still be attracted to people, because he cant. this guy had never grasped the concept of romance and never will, because theres no reason for it to him. hes trans because i say he is, i dont have many reasons for THAT but its just the signals hes sending me. trans to trans communication trust

Zoro - gay. thats it thats the post. no but i dont ship luffy with anyone but zoro is just attracted to literally any man who is strong, thats his criteria and thats all he ever needs. is he aware of it? not at all, he has no idea that its not normal to get bricked up by the thought of other men

Nami - i havent seen a bigger lesbian in media ever, genuinely i dont think any other character is as obviously lesbian as she is. she loves girls unapologetically no matter what, supports all girls at the end of the day (cough kalifa) . i also hit her with the asexual beam because i can, specifically demisexual because i THINK so

Usopp - while i wanna consider kaya, i wanna consider sanji too and thats making me lean between bi or omni even if omni is a label under the bi umbrella. its more a question of if he recognises his preference for men or not, because he does prefer then at the end of the day. the ace beam bounces from nami to usopp because he too doesnt feel anything and doesnt think about it either

Sanji - oh my god where do i begin. maybe just the blatant queer coding of wci as a whole?? of course hes attracted to women, thats not an aspect you can remove or just toss around to being something else. he loves and respects women, but he is so QUEER. all of wci is just queer coding, its a queer story and sanji is a queer character i will die on this hill. he probably has some kind of gender issues too, what specifically? no clue, but he likes people of multiple genders and is in deep denial about it all the time he wont ever truly accept it but he can one day as a treat live with that fact

Chopper - oh hes a reindeer he cant really have a sexuality DID WE FORGET THE FACT HES HUMAN TOO ISNT THAT LIKE HIS WHOLE THING, NOT BEING A MONSTER BUT ALSO A HUMAN. HE IS BOTH? i dont have any specific labels to slap onto him, just that hes a people lover and encourager of literally everything. ace beam bounces onto him too

Robin - trans trans trans trans trans trans trans trans you will accept robin transfem into your life right here right now. she can like anyone, she has no label on it, she just likes people and cant bother with genders or anything like that. the ace beam actually skips her because if they were doing a hear me out cake she’d be the one putting all of the crazy things. freak. (lovingly)

Franky - HOW TRANS CODED IS IT NOT TO REBUILD YOUR OWN BODY TO BECOME A BETTER VERSION OF YOURSELF AND TO REBUILD YOUR LIFE IN A WAY YOU WANT, BUT GOING BACK TO WHAT YOU LOVED ABOUT YOUR OLD SELF, AND EMBRACING IT. literally, trans goals. he modified his body and went i might as well give myself top surgery and an awesome dick while im here!! sexuality wise hes a lover of everyone, but he has preferences for women (robin) but encourages all bromances (with brook)

Brook - THIS IS WHERE IM MOST PASSIONATE!!!! people can say that hes the token straight grandpa. but theyll never understand the joy of old gay brook had a romance with his captain, the joy of brook trying to subtlety let the other strawhats know he accepts them (he isnt subtle at all and everyone knows). look at brook in drag twice for no reason and tell me he isnt queer, in some way. the ace beam finally hits someone and its brook, insert skull joke here

Jinbei - very specifically old gay man who didnt really do much throughout his youth, he always knew he liked men but he never had TIME to do anything, too busy being awesome and a father i fear. now that hes with the crew he isnt automatically gonna seek anyone out, but hes also not gonna restrain himself from finding interests in people, hes being more selfish now and thats good for him. finally the ace beam hits jinbei and proceeds to fly off towards other op characters that i might talk about some other time

can you tell im asexual and love projecting onto characters with it !!!!

[danteashida]

I'm on episode 40 of season 2 of my MCD rewatch so far.

I can now safely say, it bothers me when people say that Aphmau never showed interest or reciprocation towards Garroth or Laurence because it's just not true. Most of her reciprocation for BOTH of them was displayed in the first quarter of season 2. Of course Laurence has the upper hand here because Garroth is...Well... Well he's fighting for his life in another dimension but my point is. She even accepts a kiss from Laurence and doesn't push him away from it or deny her feelings afterward when he gives her the chance to. Even earlier to this occurrence she goes through this whole crisis of realizing that she has feelings for both of them. And from what I've noticed, there's been a handful of moments where a season 1 Aphmau would normally shut down or deny Laurence, but in season 2 she instead just stays silent and blushes. In my opinion thats definitely showing us her baby steps in coming around to the whole returning the feelings thing but we all know how it goes and she moves on a couple dozen episodes later.

Also, notably -- and i kind of dont even want to bring this up as a point because it honestly seems a little more on the like...weird...side to me almost -- she didn't even need to kiss Laurence at that wedding to get him grounded. Even Laurence points this out immediately after the kiss. Makes me raise an eyebrow even more. The tension between Laurmau is undeniable no matter which way you flip it and even Laurence points out to her (in a serious tone this time! hes not just joking around!) that he KNOWS that Aphmau likes him back now but they're both holding back. Aphmau again, doesn't deny it.

I think Aphmau's problem aside from being painfully oblivious (in most of s1) is that she refuses to sit down and assess her feelings about them and she's always pushing those feelings aside until theyre brought up again for some reason instead of facing this inner turmoil. Understandably she's already going through a lot though.

I understand not being a fan of either ship or how they played out or a million other different related complaints and opinions but saying the attraction was never there feels just factually incorrect.

Tldr is polyamory could've solved a lot of problems just sayinggggg whateverrrr man.

[noihavenosanitythanksforasking]

tldr: the story of how i figured out im gay and why i relate to byler so much. aka why its good rep

this was not supposed to be this long

my best friend doesnt like stranger things bc she thinks the metaphorical texture of the show is gross feeling(valid) but she follows me on here and has had to block the byler tag bc its all i post about these days and shes not into it.

anyways it made me think about why i love byler so much and it definitely has to do with the fact that as a queer person i relate super heavily to their story. being gay is way more acceptable now and i was born in 07 so its not like its was considered a death sentence to be gay in general. however i grew up in the classical church. my mom was part of a religious cult in highschool and i was my parents first kid and they were super protective of me. Im also autistic and i spent most of my childhood very worried about doing and acting the right way to make people accept me. my parents favorite story to tell people about my childhood is that when i finally graduated my crib and got a toddler bed they were worried that i would never let them sleep again. that didnt happen tho, in fact i refused to get out of bed with out express permission and would lay there until they came told me i could get up.

id like to say that i was homophobic growing up but not in the traditional sense. it was more that i was actually afraid of gay people. No one around me ever really said anything blatantly homophobic or had radical ideas about the subject but we were so deep into the church and i was always afraid of everything. when i was in elementary school we would do drills. call and response cult like stuff. theyd ask us to define sin and wed spout off this memorized line about going agaisnt gods will in action or thought or intention. i didnt even know what a gay meant until i got to middle school and the entire idea terrified me. because thats not allowed and when someone brings it up all the adults get that one look on their face and the pastor says that homosexuality is a sin or wtv.

i had this one friend, lets call her jane, at the time. i really liked her but she was kind of a delinquent, she didnt have the best home life and she was kind if an angry kid so when she came out to our friend group as bisexual in i think 7th grade, we (the rest of the group was v religious ) were concerned about it but not really surprised. we werent supportive but we werent angry either. it was more like we werent sure what to do. she had always been a problem child so it didnt seem to out of the blue for someone like her to like girls so we just kind of tried not to talk about it again.

I was a pretty big drama kid at the time( still am) (i swear i have a point to this) and i became friends with this one girl. lets call her belle. anyways i reallllyyyy liked belle i dont think i had a crush on her but i thought she was really cool and fun and liked hanging around her. we werent really close much to my past and present dismay but when i did hang out with her i always had a fun time. a few years later she told me that she was bisexual. this pretty much broke my little brain. because belle was cool and fun and normal and it was the first time when i realized that maybe there was something wrong with the way my church worked. they had to be wrong because there was no way belle was evil and going to hell. i loved being friends with her and i couldn't accept the fact that her liking girls changed anything. she still felt like the same person. still the topic was terrifying to me, i was so afraid that i was wrong or maybe just not smart enough to see the truth. so many people around me that i grew up being told knew what was right, knew what god was telling us said that it was wrong so maybe i just didnt get it. maybe i wasnt close enough to god to understand what made gay people so bad. still something changed from then and the next year i ended up being close to this girl, lets call her beth, (all my other friends had either moved on or were on different sides of our grade and tbh i was terrified of her but i had no one else). Anyways beth also had a crazy homelife she talked a lot about how she hated her family and how she would kill her dad if she could. she also ate highlighters, just drew on her tongue, and sold pictures of her feet on instagram to make money. needless to say as soon as i hit highschool i never spoke to her again, she freaked me out. anyway one day me and beth were walking at recess and she turns to me and tells me that im gay. i knew she was pan at this point and i didnt really care though looking back on it she was definitely flirting with me. I got freaked out and told her there was no way i was gay and assumed that she just wanted me to like her back but id had a crush on a guy before so i couldnt be gay.

speaking of this guy, he sat next to belle in my science class in 6th grade. i sat behind them and they were good friends. we were sort of a trio in that class and i thought he was really nice and funny. he was the first guy id ever been friends with and i assumed that the fact that i enjoyed hanging out with him and having fun meant that i must have a crush on him. because girls and boys cant just be friends. thats what everyone always said at least. one day we were texting and he told me that he liked me and wanted to go out. i csnt describe the feeling i got then. it was this werid mix of anxiety and fear and knowing that i should be excited but instead i was disappointed. and i didnt know why. i told him i wasnt allowed to date til 16 and if he still wanted me then whe could date then. i cried about it for almost a year. which doesnt make any sense because i rejected him not the other way around. but i felt heartbroken. im still not really sure why.

when beth told me i was gay i p much told her to f off in the most good christian way possible but i still thought about it. the idea felt so overwhelming and i couldnt think about it without wanting to have a panic attack so i stopped thinking about it. then i had a gay dream about jane and honestly i should have figured it out then but somehow i completely disregarded.

i changed schools for high school so i was with a lot of new people. i wanted a fresh start. at the time i felt like id been pretending to be someone else for my whole life and i hoped that starting over would help me find myself or something. I always sort of knew i was different from other kids i never felt like we had much in common or something but i could never put a finger of what it was (it was the autism). when i started highschool my main goal was to make friends on my own and conquer my social anxiety when had been crippling throughout middle and elementary. i ended up meeting this girl, lets call her cassie, (so many people ikik) and we became super close. she had a lot of issues as well bc apparently i attract unstable people. she was by far the worst id dealt with though. she was suicidal, ocd, anorexic and hurt her self a lot. it was a very codependent friendship but we were attached at the hip. she was my whole world at the time, nothing else really mattered more than her not killing herself. one day we were texting after midnight and she told me that she thought she might be bisexual and i told her a didnt care. i really didnt care i was more worried about her killing herself. she said she had a crush on someone but wouldnt tell me who and i let the topic die.

then heartstopper came out on netflix and i got DEAD sick. i couldnt even speak. it was very bad. anyways i had a computer at this point and was looking for something to watch. i settled on heartstopper because id heard so many good things about it and i was morbidly( at the time) curious. i watched the entire show in one sitting. i was scared my mom would find out and when she did find out she gave me this hesitant look and said she didnt love the idea of me watching that kind of stuff. i watched it anyways. i was mesmerized dude. the scene of nick nelson in his bedroom, on the verge of tears searching the internet for anwsers was so powerful to me and it was like something clicked in my brain.

what if i am gay??

id never let myself actually ask mysrlf that before. id never dared to even think it was a possibility because of course im straight. id know if i liked girls. but i sat there dead sick and dying slowly and looked over at my book case at all my favorite books. i looked up on youtube how to tell if your bisexual (bc ofc i like guys duh) and it said something about thinking about how you feel about fictional characters and i sat and i thought. it was a very overwhelming week. i thought back to middle school and the strange possessiveness i had over my best friend at the time, the feeling of hurt i always seemed to have when she hung out with someone else. i hated that part of myself. i felt validated in my feelings at the time but i never knew why i felt that way and it felt unfair to her.

at the time i was talking to a guy. he was nice and pretty chill but i sort of knew i didnt like him the way he liked me. i wanted to though. i wanted to like him so freaking badly. so i kept taking to him. id be on the phone with him for 5 hours just talking about nothing and tell myself that this was what its like to like someone. it wasnt a bad experience, he was nice and i liked to talk to him. but i didnt have feelings for him. one night i texted cassie back and told her that maybe i was bi too. she was from a christian household too and we talked for a while one what we should do.

my parents have always had this policy of being honest with each other when sometbing happens in our lives. which i think is pretty normal but my autistic ahh took it very seriously. almost as soon as i started questioning i told them. bad idea, was not ready. i was so scared that somehow theyd look at me and figure out that i was thinking about it, and that theyd be mad that i didnt talk to them about it. i said it at dinner and there was legit forks dropped. my mom took me on a 2 hour long walk to try and explain myself which was HELL because i couldnt even understand what was going on.

"why do you think you like girls??"

"idk"

they eventually dropped the subject.

soon after that me and cassies relationship started to get werid. after being so codependent for so long we had thsi strange sort of toxic need for each other to be sane or something. she confessed that she had a crush on me and i really wasnt sure how to feel about it. she was so important to me and the trauma and confusion and drama of our friendship got all jumbled in my head and we fell into some sort of homo romantic something. we never did anything besides holding hands a few times, but we did that before either of us came out anyways. we went to summer camp summer after freshmen year and shit really hit the fan and we ended up having a friendship breakup. she told me afterwards that she was a devoted christian now, that god had saved her from herself and that now she was straight. i was really lost the rest of that summer. i wasnt sure what to do at all, who i was or what i was supposed to do now that i left the person i had dedicated the past year of my life and my mental health too. i was really suicidal for a few months after that but slowly i got better.

second semester of sophomore year i had my first real crush on one of my close friends at the time. she was straight which sucked but those 6 months of my life were some of the most terrible exhilarating experiences of my life. thats how i knew i wasnt wrong. bc theres no heterosexual option for wanting to make out with a girl in a dirty school bathroom stall.

it was hard though, being in love with someone you know will never feel that way about you. even if at the time i had mostly gotten over the majority of my internalized homophobia theres still that feeling of guilt. you feel so gross and creepy and unwanted. this person doesnt want you, they dont even want your gender but you cant let it go. its a very lonely feeling.

it was around the same time that i figured out that i was a lesbian. after i felt what it was like to like someone, really like someone. to be able to identify that feeling as romantic feelings, it was pretty obvious that i didnt like guys. i felt really bad about the guy i was talking too. he had no idea and id just heen leading him on for almost a year. i felt super shitty about it.

idk if that was coherent but i guess thats why i love byler so much. it feels so raw and real to me. i watch the van scene and i see myself. i see how hard it was and how much i hated myself and wanted so badly to be normal and to be able to talk about boys with my friends without feeling uncomfortable. i see the way mike is with el and i see myself with that boy from middle school. so desperate for affection and so so confused. this feeling of guilt and regret, the heartbreak of loosing someone that you couldve had but you dont want. i want to want it but i dont and its so heartbreaking.

i almost think its a worse feeling that being broken up with. i fell in love with a girl recently and she ended up ending things. i was super upset about it cried for a long time. but still. its not the same hurt. it hurts but its not the same deep primal hurt. sitting on my bathroom floor at 13 years old sobbing my eyes out because im not with a boy that i rejected. wishing that things were different but not wanting to actually change. i broke my own heart and i didnt even mean too

[red-elric]

i think what a lot of ppl miss about the nuance when it comes to the retcon is that the POINT of it is that its a bad ending. homestuck is designed to be a tragedy and it was never going to end well; its frankly ridiculous to try and shoehorn in a scenario where none of the current main characters are dead when the story is ABOUT death. its not narratively satisfying at all like this! but thats not what the kids wanted (and, more to the point, thats not what the FANS wanted. newer fans DEFINITELY miss the fact that homestuck was written as a conversation between hussie and the fans, a conversation that turned into an argument halfway through and led to a lot of things being taken in bad faith on both sides. but i digress; this is a watsonian post)

the retcon powers are very VERY explicitly described as the ability to change the alpha timeline. the 'whats supposed to happen' of it all, the premeditated narrative the story was written to fill. conversely, when aranea used the ring of life to come back and meddle, she is explicitly described as 'causing a doomed timeline.' and like, the thing about doomed timelines is that theyre meant to happen as much as theyre meant to be fixed. theyre how paradox space accounts for and incorporates time travel, and the existence of the doomed timeline is often NECESSARY for the alpha timeline to function. thats how you get davesprite, thats how the aradiabot that brought gamzee's honkHONK code back from his crazy murder timeline contributed to doc scratch's creation, thats why every dead dave helped the alpha timeline dave figure out what to do. if vriska was meant to have never died in the first place the timeline wouldve been doomed long before game over. the ring went to the wrong person, and thats the kind of simple fix sburb was expecting to solve with some time travel to get things back on track

the ring was supposed to go to someone else. probably vriska! from the alpha timelines perspective, it wasnt that long after her confrontation with john that she really changed and grew as a character. that she became someone who deserved a second chance. imagine: john uses his retcon as normal time travel, the way sburb comprehended it through the limitations of its code. he takes the ring before aranea can, goes to the dream bubbles, and has another conversation with vriska. maybe she doesnt even really want the ring anymore, and thats exactly the kind of thing that would convince john to give it to her. and she agrees, because he tells her terezi is waiting for her. they go back, they have the final fight, and people die. maybe they dont come back. but its the group of characters who earned the ending, who we watched grow up for three years

but thats not what happened, and it was never going to be what happened, because as narratively satisfying as it could have been? john and terezi wanted something different. john wanted everything to be OVER and terezi wanted the chance to make a different choice, even if it was wrong. theyre selfish; theyre kids. theyre tired of being characters in a story, of someone else pulling their strings. thats what typheus's choice was about, you know? and john made the wrong choice. some other version of john could have fixed things the "right" way, had our john decided to die instead. to accept the consequences of the doomed timeline and let pardox space fix it. hell, between roxys first instinct to just sit and let the void take her and terezis pointy horns offering a counterpoint we have some pretty blatant devil/angel on the shoulder imagery! and john making the same wrong choice he did when terezi first told him to fly to the seventh gate, except this time there was no davesprite on angel wings, no one left alive he cared about enough to listen to. because as much as john felt like he was SUPPOSED to fall for roxy, the girl version of his fathers lover, someone strongly associated with his half of karkat's shipping chart but without the complication of being a lesbian, someone HUMAN to repopulate the world with cut out of his apocalypse movie fantasies...... terezis way of thinking has always appealed to him more. because as much as he pretends its not true, john doesnt like to take things lying down, and he doesnt like when other people do either. he gets bored! hes attracted to the danger and morally grey self confidence terezi and vriska exude, so. he listened to terezi, and they brought vriska back.... without any of the character development she had gone through.

and its a bad ending, because of course it would be. and thats the point :) it was stupid to think two kids could meddle with the fate of the universe and it was stupid to think that these kids could have a happy ending so easily. but can you really blame them?

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hey cas!!!

So i just wanted to start this by saying i LOVE your fics and clandestine is my favourite and i LOVE the way youve done regular and sirius relationship and i think it was done PERFECTLY and it makes me so happy

Also this is going to have VERY little punctuation so i apologise in advance

''Punctuation who is she? We dont know her?''

I dont know how to start this so in just going to jump right in

So basically im gender fluid and i have a different name which my old friend group took pretty badly so i had to move groups. Its okay tho cuz i wasnt without one for more than like a minute because a friend (who well call K for the purpose of this) was also on the gc (which i came out on after coming out at a sleepover about maybe a week before and they ignored it) which i made to come out onto and she basically adopted me

But i still miss them so much and message them things that remind me of them and its sad

Also they told me i give shitty friendship so i get what im given

But now heres the problem

I still think about prom (its one of my favourite things to think about) but o still want to wear a dress. Like no matter what gender day it is i still want a dress. And so i feel kind of fake. Like after all this shit im still faking it. And it makes me feel really guilty that im not 'normal' if you know what i mean?

Anyhoe this has just been really bothering me recently. Like more than normal

Also heres a fox because theyre my favourite animal and i want to share how much i love it lmao 🦊

Hi! Thank you for the love!

First of all, if your friends don't accept your for who your are and aren't willing to learn, they're bad friends. No matter what you've done.

As far as prom- there's nothing wring with wearing a dress, it doesn't make you fake at all! You're not faking it just because you want to wear a dress <3 I'm genderfluid and I'd highkey wear a dress to my prom if I was in high school again. Plus, you can always play around with your hair/makeup depending on how you're feeling that day!

Remember that gender and gender expression are different and it's okay to express your gender however you choose <3

[cheriemariii]

part 5/5 of that fuckass sihjr yuri au look book ⁉️ (4)

(yeah anyways this is oc x canon content, which is practically part of this aus canon,,, just a heads up there,,,)

haruhiko

-office siren!!!!!!!!!!!

-(i was tempted to also describe hatori as office siren back when i made that other post. and perhaps it also counts but its just very different??????? like hatori is supposed to resemble a very normal office worker (which she is...... allegedly), whereas haruhiko looks like she literally owns the company (shes getting there)).

-also kind of inspired by bayonetta yes thanks for noticing :)

-usually very feminine, a little bit in contrast with usagis more androgynous style (like it is mostly a matter of personal style, but in a way its also like an allegory to how haruhiko seems to be confined by her role within the usami family while usagi managed to escape it and make a name of herself, and so haruhiko disproves of usagis “breaking of gender norms” or whatever bc its a reflect of that freedom she just will never seem to get???? or something like that lalalalalala)

-she wears skirts most of the time. *obviously* never anything above the knee ofc bc she! is! a! proper! woman!

-(you know, for someone who really likes drawing mini skirts and long legs and shit,, most of my au characters seem to be allergic to the idea of wearing a mini skirt kshfksjfkdhfksj)

-so she only wears pants when she has to be in construction site (which is not very often bc she is more into the design part of the process). and when she is there shes not like breaking any safety rules,, but she does look a little off.

-always (ALWAYSSSSS) dresses in dark colors, namely black, red and purple. Its sober and appropriate and shit, but also I feel it gives her and miwako this sort of darker mutual aesthetic that I kinda like? its like a couple of vampires except none of them would ever go full goth, one bc daddy fuyuhiko would never allow it and the other bc she cannot dedicate more than 5 minutes to her looks

-loves lace. But not only as in tiny details here and there, I mean full pieces of fabric covered in black lacey flowers (that's kinda what I was trying to convey with the third look but idk if it worked jdhsjdhshs)

-rather subtle but still very obviously expensive jewelry. Just a friendly reminder that she is rich :)

-very dark makeup also (at least compared to others(?)

-short hair bc its easier to style and take care of. i also like to think of it as an allegory to her more neat and composed self (for the sake of societal acceptance), in contrast to miwako very clearly no longer giving a shit about that which also reflects on her messier hair GOSH I LOVE HAIR SYMBOLISM

-very tall but not as tall as her sister (just like in canon). she does not make a big deal out of it bc she is very mature, but it is secretly a bit of a pet peeve for her

- bad enough myopia for the glasses to stay on most of the time. ig she does has the resources to get eye surgery… but i dont want her to =)

miwako

-youd think that since this is an oc were talking about she shouldve be a lot easier to design bc its not like i can go very ooc with a character *i* invented… but you’d be wrong

-she was actually one of the hardest ones to design for some very strange reason xd

-so one of her main things design-wise is that she looks like an engineer (?) because she is one,,

-this is such a funny statement tho bc i literally study in an university thats exclusively degrees focused on exact sciences and engineering… and so far in the two and a half years ive been there i have never seen a single woman, be it a student or a teacher, that looks anything like miwako kfkhsjhsjd like not even the less girly girls dress like that

-on the other hand tho, easily more than half of the male population dresses just like that,,, so ig miwako is more like the butch engineer representation we didnt know we needed? or something?

-and ik that concept is supposed to sound like super hot but unfortunately to all of us miwako is kind of a loser u_u

-aywayyyyyyyys….. wears button-up shirts almost religiously; usually the kind youd find in your dads closet, but significantly smaller. the very few times she is not wearing one of those she is wearing a turtleneck bc god forbids she shows any more skin that that

-thermostat is very fucked up as well so virtually all of the time you will see her with a sweater or a jacket or a cardigan or whatever she found in her closet that morning

-almost exclusively dresses in dark, very muted colors, mostly bc she just hates calling any sort of attention onto herself

-i also remember as i was designing her that she kinda started resembling will graham to me???? it wasnt even intentional but i cant unsee it now kjskjgkajfk

-(what if will graham was a lesbian,,, the lives that would change,,,,, )

-average height, if only sliiiiightly taller than that

-very skinny. obviously not chiaki levels of skinny, but skinny enough to create some sort of complex (she actually kinda resembles misaki in this regard………..)

-long curly hair that she doesnt pay much mind in styling. i already explained that symbolism

-has dark hair just like haruhiko. i know this is like incest to nakamura, but i kinda just really like how she looks with dark hair??????

-the big ass glasses are more than a design choice. they are because she has very very bad sight and zero sense of aesthetics (amazing time to fall for an architect......)

-its also not very obvious by just looking at her from afar, but she is kind of supposed to resemble edgar allan poe??? you know with the droopy eyes, quite pronounced eyebags (that i forgot to draw xd), dark messy hair, that ever-lasting serious and kind of melancholic expression…..

-this does indeed have an explanation. i dont wanna get too much into miwako lore here bc theres too much to be said and maybe i should make a post about that (eventually……), but long story short miwakos frustrated dream is to be an horror writer (remember how haruhiko used to undermine usagi for being a writer?? well this kind of originated as a sort of “karma” for that bc wouldnt it be suuuuper funny if haruhiko winded up dating a writer xdxdxdx) (the horror thing on the other side is like a way for miwako to embrace the ~darkness~ within. by darkness i mostly do mean unresolved childhood trauma. and also homosexuality). and so i chose edgar allan poe bc i feel miwakos writing style would resemble his, and also he has like a very recognizable aesthetic that i thought would be cool to reference through miwako (???)

-(in my mind this whole thing sounds very cool bear with me)

ok that was all like and subscribe for more yaoi man lesbianism thx bye :)

[thebomb-thebird-andtheburntbitch]

"you'd like me to what?" zhongli had been enjoying your company in silence for a spell before you had blurted out a request you wished he would fulfil for you.

"show me how to fight with a polearm." zhongli had not yet divulged the information about him being a god to you, and as far as he knew you hadn't known just how much physical power he possessed. so why ask him?

"may i ask why you've chosen to come to me with this request? i'm afriad i am quite at a loss."

"well, you go out with the traveler on occasion, right? and they're super strong and it's not like you go on leisurely walks among the hilichurl invaded mountains of liyue." before zhongli could even try and rebuttle, you keep going. "and truthfully, if you go out into the rolling hills with the traveler covering you everywhere you go, that makes you look kinda bad you know."

"bad?" his voice pitches and recoils slightly from your words.

"making them do all the work while you sit back and do nothing! that certainly would paint a bad picture if you keep going out there willingly and don't learn. so! you must know something."

"hmm," he hums, wordless agreeing with a small furrow to his brow and a sweat on his neck. though your scenarios were purely hypothetical and very untrue since he does carry his own weight very well, it still wasn't a picture his wanted you to paint of him. "perhaps.. you're correct. but, then why would you request training specific to polearms? could you not ask a local millelith for aid?"

"i could i guess," you deflate and he almost cracks right there. "but hu tao said you were definitely a better choice in regards to what i'm looking for."

zhongli feels a deep sigh in his chest at the mention of the current director. yes, this does have her written all over it. if she wasn't looking into ridiculous ways of promoting the business of death, she was snooping around in zhongli's love life- or lack thereof since you were not his significant other much to her displeasure.

"last i check however, you were already very skilled in other means of combat. why the sudden interest?"

"isn't is a good thing to broaden your horizons? that's what childe said anyways."

you've also convened with childe it seems. lovely.

"you really should disregard anything those two say." his voice is normal as he speaks, but the dryness of it makes you laugh. he wasn't joking, but he smiles at you regardless.

"well, i'm not going to pressure you!" you get the sense that his questions were a very very polite way of stalling you from a rejection. "if you dont want to, childe did offer since he said he's mastered every form of combat aside from archery." zhongli felt his brow twitch.

"i also wouldn't recommend getting too frivolous with childe. kind though he may act, he is still someone to be cautious of."

"because he's a fatui?"

"partially." also because he'll easily vie all of your free time from this point onwards until he leaves liyue if you go to him for training. zhongli wouldn't get to enjoy your company like this anymore if you do run to childe, and that idea alone makes his chest itch. "i accept your request."

his calm agreement makes your face light up and your eyes shine with such excitement he feels antsy. strange how strong the urge to kiss you grows when you look at him like he had just hung the stars.

zhongli is lucky the next time you see childe and tell him that zhongli will be training you with polearms, he's seated up in the higher shops of liyue's red-fenced architecture. the strained, yet begrudging look of disappointment to cross the harbingers face is a perfect appetizer to go with his fresh cup of tea.

as is the smug look zhongli shoots him when childe feels the burning gaze on his skull and looks up once you saunter off. zhongli takes pleasure in knowing he is a being who is and always will be above childe, both in his current fenced in seat above his head and higher status of being. a mere fatui harbinger has nothing on a god, gnosis or no.

zhongli was untouchable by many, in many ways. you however, all you had to do was simply ask and he would do whatever you wished.

besides, he hadn't forgotten what childe tried to do to his nation where all his beloved people and you resided. and his memory, much to childe's misfortune, is very good.

[cumulo-stratus]

BAU autism headcannons

(GIF NOT MINE)

(male reader)

CW: possible swearing, mentions of meltdowns and overstimulation, lemme know if theres anything else!

A/N: sry i havent rly posted in a while, i started a school recently and its been a rly big change for me so ive just been emotionally/mentally exhausted like all the time, but i dont wanna abandon u guys so i decided i would get something up, even if its not super good, thanks for y’all’s understanding <3

i think both JJ and Emily would become sort of mothers to reader

(not that they werent already mothers to the rest of the team but reader especially)

like JJ would totally have a motherly instinct for readers needs (like a sort of spider sense)

like if your ever nervous about something being too much or being overwhelming, jj would kinds know this and either make arrangements for accommodations or make sure you know you dont have to go if you want to.

and like she definitely wold put herself in charge of keeping your safe foods stashed on the jet and at the office

emily is more of a mother in a protective way than jj is

like this girl will not hesitate at all to go off on someone for maybe being disrespected to about stimming your chair while thinking

or like if you dont want to shake a police officers hand when your being introduced, and you get dirty/weird looks for it, or anyone comments on it? BOOM this girl will stare at them with so much animosity they’ll be scared of her shes so hot oml

anyways i thinks he team would be super accepting of you, especially if you joined after reid like they would already have some experience with autism

and like if you weren’t ent comfortable telling anyone other than hotch(i feel like it would be like a in ur file thing idk how the government works tho) spencer would defo be able to tell and confront u privately abt it (our respectful king <3)

and if you are comfortable telling the team, everyone would be respectful

i think like rossi/gideon would be a little clueless but like trying their hardest

like rossi would have no idea what stimming is but understands that like you move in certain ways or make certain noises when ur excited

and like with all his money he wouldnt hesitate to spoil u with any fidget toy u need/want or like a rly nice weighted blanket (its insane how expensive those things are)

and like gideon despite his profound understanding of others (hope yall got that ;)) he wouldn’ t get why sometimes you dont feel like/cant talk but totally respects it

omg garcia is our autism ally QUEEN im telling you

always has a big basket of fidgets/stim toys sitting on her desk and when your having a rough day shell leave you a little goodie in a brightly colored and decorated bag

i firmly believe that she is the queen at finding brands with clothes that not only fits your style perfectly but is also sensory friendly

i think she would definitely say that if she never ended up working in the FBI she wouldve started a clothing shop for sensory friendly clothing/accessories

spencer would totallllyyyy be your best friend when it comes to being under-stimulated

he will totally info dump on you and vice-versa

spencer (like penlope) would totally recommend clothing brands that are sensory friendly, but sock brands in particular

and everyone makes fun of you for nerding out over everything

also spencer would definitely get in the habit of grabbing your hands in his when you start to pick a t your nails and cuticles

like he didnt even realize what he was doing the first time but now he does it without thinking about it and for the team its normal

“hey,” and he would gently grab your hands to stop you from picking at them

“sorry..”

”youve nothing to be sorry for” (with that little reid smile oml rf[osifjgturhv)

and i also firmly believe that morgan is the best people to go to if your having a meltdown

he would stop you from harmfully stimming

“hey sugar, unclench those pretty little hands for me. there we go… good job kid.” he would have the softest smile and voice

and when he takes your hands to stop you from hitting yourself his grip is rly firm but gentle

but hotch is the best to go to for when your overstimulated

like he would make sure you know his office is always a quiet place you can go to with out questions

and he would secretly have a stash of like stimm toys in his office that he stole from garcia

his couch is always open to you, especially like late at night if you are really tired his fatherly instincts will kick in and force you to come to his office for a break

he would would hand you and blanket and a stim toy

”sit. sleep”

thats all he would say in his cute little stern but actually caring voice <3

[buckpregnant]

Anonymous asked: look at us psychoanalyzing omega!gale i love that for us. you got me with the sex thing…. yes you're totally right i can't see under any circustance (the most extreme: in heat) gale letting marge top him, even if his omega is screaming at him that he needs it, he could accept her help with other sexual activities but penetration i can't see it, which we can use to play the card gale is a virgin and is convincing himself that after mating/marriage he would be able to do "the thing" to have kids with marge (me, you and bucky know it's a lie, but well… who's going to tell him?). beta!marge is interesting with the points you made on the original post that she won't get it, (here it's open to interpretation/decision of each author BUT) in general betas aren't that attuned to the things that alphas and omegas experiment, so it would be a HUGE elephant in the room for them when they are alone, she can't help gale with his heat, she can't read him by his smell/phreromones, she can't mate him properly (a beta's bite doesn't do anything) but maybe gale is willing to sacrifice the idea of a partner that understand him on a celular level for the pace of mind that he is being The Man and in an acceptable/expected relationship. so yeah, a lot to consider… it's fun, as you said once you understand the few rules of the omegaverse it's interesting to play and twist them a little to see how it plays with the canon material. btw you killed my brain with the idea of bucky watching gale suffer and can't do anything bc he isn't his mate, but marge isn't there and buck needs help and all the pack is in distress, also and he is the pack leader and his alfa is sad and whinning and bucky is fine gale let me help just help, and gale is so far gone that he just "accepts" AND THE SHAME AFTERWARDS they can't look each other in the eye, gale flies off everytime and resguard with alex (a beta) then comes the forced march, bucky spirals even more, gale escapes bucky no, more shame and guilt, they reunite and they still don't talk about it GALE STILL GOES TO MARGe, god the special brand of angst knowing they are bilogically so compatible, both his omega and alpha know they are made for each other and still…. about the medicine! i haven't given much thought but you're right, it makes sense the only way to get suppressants or any omega related medicine would be once he is enlisted (it is an obligatory requirement) which would be funny bc gale is like "i'm taking suppressants why i'm feeling this warm all over my body everytime bucky puts his arm around my shoulders" and i'm like… son… p.s.: i'm kind of used to talk about this topic with friends and my sister but yeah, it's better that it is inside the devils sacrament with the doors closed, not locked, just closed. p.s.s: just in case, you don't have to answer this, i just wanted to let you know i saw it and read it haha, thanks it was fun, putting gale in gender situations is fun.

im so sorry this is from forever ago and i totally forgot

so this was in response to this conversation on my main basically we were talking about basically is “what is marge’s designation” and my argument was that she was a beta so that closeted gale and beta marge can have awkward and clumsy missionary position sex and that i dont think omegaverse world marge would be an alpha cus in regularworld i cant imagine gale ever asking her to fuck him with a strapon

anyway…

RIGHT EXACTLY he would never let her fuck him even in heat!!! cus he is The Man (<- his words not mine) he has to be The Man of the Relationship with marge and so he thinks after the war he can get her pregnant they can be Normal as an omega man and beta woman couple

“you me and bucky know its a lie” screammmm yess!!!! but who’s gonna tell him….

EXACTLYYYY exactly like shes a beta she doesn’t Understand all the shit alphas and omegas do like scenting and biting……. shes just not a part of john and gales world (and i think its a metaphor for, or a parallel of in the regularworld marge doesn’t really understand john and gales world as a civilian. yknow that pops up a lot in clegan literature where marge doesn’t really understand what its like to be in a war zone/to be a veteran in the way gale and john do and thats how gale strays from marge and into john’s arms) so in the same way marge doesn’t Feel the things gale and john do, this primal, cosmic mating ritual that john and gale are dared say beholden to she is fundamentally cut off from that world does that make sense

↳ also. and this is kind of a thought of a thought, i do think gale kind of associates the alpha/omega stuff with war. and being a soldier. like i think he and john mate and gale gets pregnant in the stalag (like in the here i am fic) because he had his first heat in months in the stalag cus hes off the army provided suppressants. and so he associates the pregnancy and even his relationship with john (forged as comrades in arms in a war!!!!) with the war itself. and in that sense he wants his kids to be betas cus it means his kids will be normal. they’ll have a normal life which means peacetime and they wont have to deal with suppressants or heats or any else of this bullshit he wants them to just be betas and go to the movies and listen to the radio and play baseball and he thinks this while being six months pregnant in a german prisoner of war camp while his husband is in the cooler for three days cus he got too close to the fence

and like, back to your points. exactly like marge cant do anything for gale during heats (not that he’d want her to no one is allowed to see him like that!!! that weakness!!!) but bucky can and does!!! like if they did fuck during a heat and THEN GALE STILL GOES HOME TO MARGE SCREAMMM like exactly the fact they know theyre compatible like that, they lock together like magnets and its not enough to cut thru gales internalized shit and he goes home to have an unfulfilling-for-both-of-them heterosexual life YEAHHHHHH ohhhh man….

exactlyyyy. like gale is on suppressants for the first time ever in flight school in texas and he doesnt get heats anymore thank god but he still feels flustered and sweaty every time bucky touches him or pays him attention or makes him feel special and he doesn’t know why………

and finally yeah. welcome to the devils sacrament here at buckpregant haha!! sorry it took so long to respond but i love talking abt this!!<33