#but some robots does look good tho...

[kaiserouo]

happy erda. it's so cute it makes you happy

[hyp3rsh0ck]

bombards yall with lesbian battlebots

[bmpmp3]

i was like. thinking about the software situation with the cryptonloids and i got curious if there was any progress on the non-miku NT banks yet so i went to listen to those vocals they use in that mobile game (if i remember correctly they use beta versions unreleased to the public?) and like. you know. despite how contentious miku nt herself is i think some of the betas for the others sound pretty good, len sounds fantastic and rin sounds about on par with her older banks (although i do miss a bit of her sharpness) and like. i may be killed with hammers for this but i was listening to the heat abnormal cover and i think i like the kaito nt beta sound more than his v3 like he sounds fantastic here. i dont dislike his v3 or anything but the nt bits ive heard has like some of the depth and richness i so sorely miss from his v1 while having the old-yamaha-keyboard-keyboard-key-spring sound that i do enjoy of his v3.... i do wish it had more of the v1 strength tho

[scourgeofmyownbrain]

Good fucking day, Robot enjoyers! Gaze upon the updated semi-accurate height comparison of Bumblebee across the multiverse.

This is an updated version of a chart I made a few months ago. I had gotten some feedback and then TFOne came out and I kinda had to update it. I also added a Gen 1 Optimus Prime for scale, for fun... no other reason... (edit: slight adjustment made, just corrected a slight mistake in the order)

I am also working on at least two more character charts and one universe chart, so hopefully I can finish those soon (for some fucking genius reason I decided to do the characters that show up EVERY FUCKING UNIVERSE so I'm s u f f e r i n g)

*PST! Optimus, Megatron, Shockwave, Soundwave, Ratchet, and Ironhide ones are done now*

Master Post

Listed Heights, Explanations, and Justifications below the cut, bc you couldn't shut me up if you tried and I had shit to say.

Gen 1 - ~10 feet (TFwiki says greater than 3 meters so I rounded up to the first whole number because round)

Netflix Cybertron Trilogy - ~10 feet (He looks identical to Gen 1 so... the reason his photo looks weird is because I couldn't find a good full body photo with him standing straight up facing the camera so I put two images together to make the worst looking photoshop job you have ever seen)

Earth Spark - ~10 feet (There is no confirmed height yet, but using this screen shot (see below) of him standing in front of a barn door, I was able to make a reasonable guess, bc I'm so smart.)

One V1 - ~13 feet (I am well aware of what the TFWiki says: 26.429 feet. And I fully reject that number. A: These numbers are sourced from the Walmart Promotional AR Experience that came out before the movie. B: There are three decimal points, and that number does not convert into a whole number in meters (which is originally what I thought was weird about it). C: The director has said that this movie is both canon to the LA movies and its own separate canon, and Bumblebee in both sets of LA movies does not exceed 20 feet tall. Ever. So, for sanity's sake, I have used the KCV numbers as my baseline. Bee grows when he gets his t-cog so shrink this one down a few feet. Look, I'm working on the Optimus chart rn, and one of the numbers from Beast Wars on the wiki was very observably wrong, and if I can dispute numbers older than me, I can dispute numbers 2 decades younger than me from fucking Walmart. Also, yes, his picture is 3 images sandwiched together)

Animated - 13 feet 3 Inches (There is no actual given heights, but in the comments of the previous version, @phoenix-inanis told me that they had done their own analysis of TFA heights and, gonna be real with you, I am blown away by all of their work and how detailed it is. Go marvel at how much work they put in -> https://phoenix-inanis.notion.site/TFA-Height-Chart-f6ad2960ca8c4c5b859ee4958723aaa4?pvs=4 )

One V2 - ~15 Feet (Please see reasoning above. Since this is as tall as we see Bee get, he's the same height as KCV Bee. Sweet fuck, I have put way too much effort into this shit)

Knight/Capel-Verse - 15 feet (No actual numbers, but Mirage is stated to be 15 feet tall (TFWiki), and he and Bee are like the same height, so... Capel directed the ROTB movie if you're wondering why his name is there)

Bayverse V1 - 16 feet (TFWiki. This is like the first 3 movies minimum, I don't remember when he hits his growth spurt. Also mr bay is king, we have numbers for nearly every character in BV)

Cyberverse - 18 feet (I'm gonna be honest, the only info we have is from a really shitty screen shot of a magazine. SO if any one has a copy of this book from the video below, a high quality scan would be greatly appreciated and I will kiss the ground you walk upon. Yes I found the video where the screen shot comes from leave me alone)

Bayverse V2 - 18 feet (TFWiki. Movie 4-5 I can't remember which one, I'm not re-looking this up. I fucking love the bayverse tho, this is the only universe with concrete and consistent this-character-is-this-height info)

Aligned Cont. WF/FOC - 20 feet (TFWiki/Fandom. Video game info screens you godsend, kiss me sweetly)

Aligned Cont. TFP/RID15 - 21 feet (These two designs are canonically identical, like in ALC canon, Bee has not changed visually at all...Ok, yes I got this number from fandom and they give literally no source for where they got these numbers. But, I can fully believe these are accurate. Just by looking at these characters on the show I can verify these numbers in my mind. Here, let's Compare.

This is Sam compared to Bee from one of the BV movies, I'm too lazy to check which one. Sam is average size for a human and we know Bee is 16 feet tall in the first three movies. Checks out. Let's now look at a TFP Character who is also 16 feet tall.

Jack is average size for a human, and the size difference is about the same. Can you see why I can't question the Aligned heights, even if they don't have a source??!?! They specifically made this universe to be full of freakishly tall robots for some fucking reason.)

Not Pictured: Aligned Cont. Rescue Bots and Rescue Bots Academy Bumblebee - 21 Feet tall. Look, did you want to see all 5 versions of ALC Bee? No, you don't. They're all the same height anyway; the back row would have just been a wall of redundant yellow. 5 different fucking art styles in one universe, why is that one my favourite.

Here's the front row and the back row separated into their own jpgs. I know it's kind of hard to tell which Bumblebee is which when they're all together.

[verysanebsdfan]

Can u pls do the main four x a fem reader who bottles up all their emotions and pretends to be happy and one day they find the reader crying all by themselves. Sry if it wasn't clear. Btw I LOVE 🩷 ur work it is awesome.

Hii everyone!! Thank you so much for requesting!! I am glad oyu enjoy my work <33 I would like to apologize again for how long this took =͟͟͞͞(꒪ᗜ꒪‧̣̥̇) I have no excuse for myself, and also I still have a lot of requests to do so stay tuned <33 (itll probably take long but shush)

MASTERLIST!!

Might be OOC!! and is short!! :((

cw: mentions of toxic family members, no use of y/n, use of she/her pronouns but really minimal since i mostly use 'you'

ʟᴇᴏʀɪᴏ, ᴋᴜʀᴀᴘɪᴋᴀ, ᴋɪʟʟᴜᴀ, ɢᴏɴ (sᴇᴘᴀʀᴀᴛᴇ) x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

It was at that moment knew, you messed up, at least in your eyes.

・・・・・

Some minutes ago, you got a call from your lovely family member, just friendly chit chat right? Wrong!! Again and again it turned against you. It always ends like this. No matter what you try, you will never be enough for them. And lately there has been so much going on too...

・・・・・

And that is why you ended up bawling your eyes out besides the bed in your current accomodation, with him next to you.

ʟᴇᴏʀɪᴏ ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪɴɪɢʜᴛ

A sob left your throat and you looked at him with teary eyes. Why did he even bother to stay? Yes, he is different to you. He cares, but he cares enough to stay? To stay when you are at your lowest. You turn to take a look at him.

"Why are you still here?"

You sniffle as you slightly lean into his gentle touch on your back. He only continues caressing you gently, and then leans in to gently wrap his arms around you.

"I am here for you because i care...silly"

And so, he stayed by your side for a long time. Enough for you to partially calm down. Everything is good now. He's here.

ᴋᴜʀᴀᴘɪᴋᴀ ᴋᴜʀᴛᴀ

As you sob softly- actually not softly at all, you bawl your eyes out, after finally breaking down your oh so happy facade you always let on, you might actually hear someones steps towards you, slowly pushing your head upwards to look at the unwanted intruder.

"Oh...not him please...he can't see me like this"

You thought, but it was too late. He has already sat down beside you, worried. Why was a person that is so dear to him, crying on the floor, looking as if their whole family got murdered, their cat got ran over and they lost all their money due to gamling. Which, obviously, isn't true, but you might or might not look like that.

He silently sat next to you. Keeping you company, occasionally caressing your back. After all, thats what you did when he was in your place.

ɢᴏɴ ғʀᴇᴇᴄss

When Gon saw you, his best friend, bawling their eyes, not just because they watched a sad reel, or a sad movie, perhaps a sad book. No. No sign of that around. He knew something must have happened. And so he approaches you without a second thought, crouching down beside you.

"Hey...what's wrong?"

But you continue sobbing! he just wants to help, but how. And then he leaves! Really? Why does everyone leave you? That doesn't even sound like Gon. But then he returns. Carrying a bunch of snacks...such a sweet gesture right? And!! He stayed.

ᴋɪʟʟᴜᴀ ᴢᴏʟᴅʏᴄᴋ

It's not as if he knew what to do when he saw you breaking down right infront of him, even if you didn't know about him. It is not as if he got a lot of comfort when he was a kid ya know? Yet, he tries. He stays. And speak gently into your ear, how it's all gonna be okay. How he wont leave. How he will stay.

Later, when you calm down, he will awkwardly offer you some of his choco robots, not much tho!! It's still his after all....

[smileymoth]

Hermitcraft is like a medical malpractise central to me bc nobody has training in being a doctor (beside Gem maybe)

If you get injured/get ill your choices are: 1) chug 10 vials of health regen and hope it does something 2) die and hope you come back right 3) choose one of the other hermits to take care of you which could go in multiple different ways::

Docm can fix up your technical things and if you have any robot limbs or parts he will help you with those but otherwise I feel like he would make it worse. Like I know this guy has done self surgery. So if you're on good terms with him you could go to him and hope that you don't come out of surgery with a tracking chip planted in you or wires in your brain

Cub could probably help you. But you need to be prepared that he's going to do it in the most unconventional ways possible and theres a 1 in 4 probability it'll cause you 10 other problems that leave you dependent on him bc he needs to fix those as well now. Also be prepared for all your confidential information about your body to be shared with Scar. Somehow the most safe option in my opinion. but watch out

Gem.... With smaller problems I feel like she could help you, but you have to beg her for it because she will think you can just walk it off. Sometimes she's right, other times you'll end up at Cub's. She does know wound care. And it's proper wound care too. She'll want to duel you first tho before she helps you bc she think's it's fun and #payment

Grian can only help you if you're a hybrid, but barely. He knows more theory than practise. Do not go to him with your problems. He will make them worse somehow.

Skizzleman knows probably too much about wound care. Like all hermits have basic knowledge of immediate wound care but I feel like he would know the best. I feel like he's also a guy who has probably stitched himself up so he knows how to do sutures. He's surprisingly gentle despite him having large hands that possible couldn't do anything so delicate.

Zedaph knows some things. He knows how to do surgery. He just doesn't like doing them. He's deeply uninterested. Even though I would probably trust him more than Cub or Docm because he doesn't seem like a guy who would sabotage you on a medical level. I think he would reroute you to Cub instead without any malice.

If you have issues with your Code please go to Tango. He will probably help you fix those. He would really want to try to fix your medical problems with fiddling around with code but most of the time he starts whining and gets pathetic about it because he's scared he's gona hurt you

Only go to Cleo if you have ripped off a limb and it didn't reattach itself when you respawned. She knows how to stitch you up. She will do it without any anesthetics or painkillers so you'll have to go through with it since she wants to be sure that she connected the nerves right. If you go to her with anything else she will look at you like you're insane

[revelboo]

heyhey, just popping in to say your fics have me in a chokehold its all i can think about for the past few weeks your writing is so scrumptious tho the rate at which you're pumping these out like clockwork is a tad concerning remember to plz take care of yourself babe

Thanks! I just write these for fun when I’m bored- with my attention span, I’m bored more often than not unless I’m actively engaged with something

Even if It Kills Me Pt 11

Armada Starscream x Reader

• Stepping into his quarters with the mini-cons in tow, it’s the silence that has him rocking to a stop. Makes his spark constrict painfully. Because you always greet him without fail when he returns, smiling and cheery. Wings flicking slightly, he approaches your little nest where he’d left you and finds you still curled up in your blankets. A vague fear clawing at him until you finally move and he relaxes. Watching Runway dive in with you and the way your head sluggishly lifts to look. “Hey.” Voice softer and huskier than he’s used to, he frowns when Runway nudges you and you still don’t get up. And you make a sharp sound and cover your nose and mouth, groaning.

• “Are you malfunctioning?” He growls as you sniffle and you suppose that’s a good enough word for it. Almost positive you somehow have the flu even though you haven’t been around any other humans to catch it. Watching his wings flick restlessly before he kneels and hesitantly touches a servo to your neck. “You’re warmer than normal. And damper,” he adds, lip curling and you laugh despite feeling awful.

• “I’m sweating because I’m running a fever. It’s fine,” you say, laughing at him. Fever? Doesn’t look like it’s fine as you tug a blanket over your head and make that sound again, entire fragile frame jerking with it to make him stiffen. Not liking this at all. You’re his to care for, but if you have some sort of illness, you need a medic. Feeling inadequate, he tugs the blanket away and you toss an arm over your face like the lights are too bright. Anxiety humming through him, he hates this. Knowing something’s wrong and being helpless to do anything about it.

• “How do I fix you?” Peeking at him, head pounding, his serious expression is too sweet. But of course he doesn’t understand that you can’t just be fixed, that it just has to run its course. But that he cares enough to want to help means a lot. Do giant alien robots even get sick? Or does he just assume you’re broken somehow? “What do you need?” Deep voice somber and worried, you sigh and immediately sneeze again. You’d love some soup and ginger ale, but you’re not about to sic your big, alien roomie on the first store he sees to get them. Can just see him tearing down a wall and reaching in to grab what he wants. Nope.

• “I just need to sleep it off. Really. I’m sure it’s not that bad.” It sounds bad. Venting softly, he sits in the floor with you and flexes his servos. Aware of his mini-cons staring at him expectantly. Like he should know how to make this better. And the way you’d said that hadn’t sounded that confident. What if it is that bad? Wings lifting slightly as you make a different, harsher sound that sets his denta on edge, he reaches and runs a servo against your spine until the fit passes. And then keeps stroking you because you arch into his touch like you enjoy it. Maybe the human kids know how to fix this?

Previous

Next

[bansheesnmbr1girl]

𓆝⋆.˚ modern day xmen fc headcanons

-the kids are CHRONICALLY online

-sean is a master at photoshop, he pays that fuckass subscription just to poorly edit photos of Alex and send them as reaction pics to the gc

-example :

-also the brainrot is INSANE with Sean

-"Hank really looks like eye of rah sometimes"-Sean

-oh God Alex is the type of guy to say "type shit" all the time

-also he abbreviates EVERYTHING, would abbreviate the word "the" if he could

-Hank def watches anime, like not like gooner anime, but like AOT, JJK, BF, and probably JJBA

-Sean also watches anime, but he watches gooner anime (only for jokes)

-Raven def transforms into some girl and tries to rizz up Sean as a joke (it worked) (he cried after he figured out it was her)

-Charles and Erik def stalk peoples facebooks

-Erik is the type of man that falls for ai generated videos of cats on Facebook too

-Hank loves musicals, specifically the book of mormon

-Sean is also like insane(idk what to call it) and prank call 911 while streaming on twitch

-Sean and Alex def share a toothbrush idk I get the vibes from them

-Erik always does the most in every situation

-Raven listens to K-pop. i can feel it in my soul (me too), lowkey, fucks w NCT, Le Sserafim, BP, and Aespa

-oh Raven also gets Sean into kpop, Sean lowkey comments freaky ahh shit abt his ults in tt comment sections. shit like : "until the whole neighborhood knows his name". oh and he stans SKZ, ENHA, and TXT

-Erik and Charles are so good cop bad cop when it comes to parenting their kids, "SEAN, NO PHONES AT THE TABLE" "Erik, let's calm down"

-the kids tried the "Shut up mom" trend on Erik, Sean nearly died...

-Hank also collects anime figures, Alex got him one for Xmas, but it's lowkey a gooner figure that Hank was too ashamed to own so he sold it

-Alex def owns a dirt bike and always tracks mud into the house

-Sean def gets a paypig after he tells pdfiles he's a 13 y/o girl, he makes them pay him or else he'll rat them out

-he always rats them out in the end tho

-Alex is chronically in debt I fear, Charles had to lend him money to pay off his credit card

-Erik owns a rather large amount of roomba cleaning robots (?)

-Erik is also a clean freak, will crash out if the house has one speck of dust

[midnightshindig]

What about Ruby and Amanda with a kid super reader

Of course being platonic, the reader is only comfortable being around them since they don't know that they're basically adults trapped in a kids body

Which leads to maybe them helping the reader get out of their shell more with the rest of the guardians, and they help mentor them and such, tho they do still have fun with their brutally honest antics

Just thought this would be adorable in a way

Monster Girl, Robot & Child!Superhero!Reader!! (platonic)

euhghghfsgarweip this is SUCH a cute idea omg

side note but it is SO funny to me that Amanda's va was so clearly told to do a childlike voice (within reason) and Rudy's va is just. Some dude. Also. Fascinated by the implication that despite having Rex's vocal cords, even grown up Rudy sounds like Robot and NOT Rex. At all. It's wild I love it

hcs under the cut!!

Rudy is AWFUL with children

I'd say you're around Oliver's age, maybe a smidge older

Definitely no older than 12

And Rudy just can't get a fucking grip

He has a hard time speaking in terms REX would understand, let alone you

But to be fair you're a good deal smarter than Rex, you actually received an education.

Amanda, on the other hand, is pretty good with kids

she seems like the type of person who is a nonchalant aunt

Probably doesn't see her nieces/nephews anymore due to her....condition(?)

So she's super child about things when you start clinging to her during GotG meetings

She's pretty used to handling Rudy's social incompetence, err, more accurately his anxieties and rough-around-the-edge nature

You yourself are a pretty anxious child

Socially, that is

It's a little funny?

Kicking MAJOR ass on the battlefield, but Bulletproof asks what you think about mushrooms on the pizza he's ordering for dinner and you're like "hhhhhhhidunnomushroomssoundfine"

and you're allergic to mushrooms but wtv

Amanda and Rudy are such a unit by the time you join the GotG (around the end of s2, i'd say) that Amanda taking you under her wing means spending ample time with Rudy as well

As hard as it is for him to interact with you on your level, he finds your quietness and curiosity about the world endearing

Amanda will leave to use the restroom and come back to find you staring at Rudy while he does some weird engineering shit, just absolutely awestruck

After long enough you begin to ask question

"Uhm- Rudy..? Why are you connecting those wires like that? I've never seen you do it that way."

"Oh. This method is more efficient for...." blah blah blah blah blah

and you're paying CLOSE attention

The three of you form a tight little unit

lowkey Amanda's having just a great time fucking braiding your hair and talking to Rudy like you're their kid

not like you're THEIR KID but like

They have a responsibility to look out for you

and that's a comfortable kind of weight to carry when you care about someone

and she loves you

isn't that just the best?

Once you've found a home base in Rudy and Amanda, it becomes easier for you to interact with the other guardians

it's slow work, Rex joining you for movies here and there, occasionally Rae will ask you a question about your day or your thoughts on something and you'll choke out a real response

You finally tell everyone you're allergic to mushroom so please can we get just normal pepperoni please

and they do

I hc Amanda is the kind of person to find harmless pranks HILARIOUS

Like she will whoopie cushion your ass and crack up while Rudy explains he tried to stop her

It makes you kinda raw when they go on dates and you're not invited

but surprisingly, it's less scary with them gone than it used to be

you'll be playing video games or crocheting or working out or something and Black Samson will just.... come hang out with you?

Just to have some company

Or Shapesmith will ask you questions about what human childhood is like

which is difficult to answer because you've never experienced NOT being a child

but it's a valuable experience either way

"So.... do you really lose teeth?"

"mhm!! Here look-" You opened your mouth and prodded at an empty space in your teeth with your tongue "This one finally came out after that fight on Monday, it's gonna take a few weeks for the adult one to grow in"

"Thats..... upsetting."

You grinned an awkward smile, full display of your weirdly small teeth

It made Shapesmith grateful he never experienced baby teeth

After becoming closer with you, it starts stressing Rudy out during fights

He KNOWS logically you're capable

but Amanda is right, he's responsible for you by virtue of being "the adult" and more importantly, being your adult

He starts pulling double duty to make protective wear for you

this man over her like "The padding in your knees, elbows, and skull all need to be reinforced, you could sprain your wrist, Y/n!"

"....Rudy I've had my femur snapped in half before...."

Don't remind him

He cried about it, it was so distressing to have to send an empty robot suit to fly you to the GDA hospital

Rudy never cries

but also he's a little proud you remembered what a femur was

Amanda calls you "Kiddo" but for humorous effect, its hilarious coming from her Loud House ass voice

Rudy calls your by your name, but refers to you as "the child" when talking to other people, or even a "young Y/n"

he just talks weird it isn't his fault!!

Amanda won't throw birthday parties for herself

she has a problem letting her life go well

BUT, she thinks they're important for a kid to experience

your first birthday at a Guardian is incredible

the entire HQ is DECKED in decorations

Rae and Rex team up to try and make your favorite food plus a cake

Black Samson is trying to figure out how to hook his Spotify up to the speakers

Zandale is somewhere explaining birthday parties to Shapesmith

Rudy is using empty robots to continue hanging party streamers in the rafters

and Amanda is holding a big box with your gift in it, beaming with pride as she-- solely-- yells

"Surprise!!! Open your gift!!"

She pushes it into your arms as you stumble under the weight of it

Obviously you rip into it, pulling out some vague but emotionally impactful gift

Probably some childish shit like an easy bake oven (but one Rudy tricked out) or a board game you loved or something

Padding the bottom are miscellaneous articles of clothing

You pull them out and marvel at them, but...

"Amanda these are way too big, these are like.... clothes for a teenager or an adult."

Amanda just shrugs casually "yeah, they were mine but... yknow, not like I'm gonna need them anytime soon."

There's a heaviness in the air before Black Samson yells out

"I GOT IT!!"

and music floods the HQ

A few hours later, all birthday rituals were successfully fulfilled

Most of the Guardians have trickled off back to their own lives, leaving you, Rudy, and Amanda on the couch, watching one of your favorite movies

It doesn't matter though, you're passed out curled up against the arm of the couch

Amanda sits next to you, her head leaning onto Rudy on her other side, himself leaning into her as a counterweight

it's an idyllic scene to be certain

what a great birthday ^^

[your-favourite-yapper]

Mary macdonald hcs (sorta modern au) bc I love her*

Used 2 be bullied in primary school

Not that bad but she just was Not Liked

Has 2 younger siblings and raised by a single dad

Changed schools after begging her dad 2 let her

Watched some 2000s hs movies to learn how to be "cool" bc she didn't have an older sister or someone to tell her how to do that

Is now tech "popular" BUT

She still feels Not Enough

She's mean 2 ppl her friends are mean to

And nice to the ones her friends are nice to

Bc all it sound take was one wrong word, one mistep

And she'd be the weird chubby kid in school noone sat next to again

TRIES HER FUCKING HARDEST AND THEN SOME STUDYING

noone rage studies like her

She gets good grades but is always top 5 nvr top 3

Has cried once when she got 98% in Chem

Not in friend of her friends tho

Doesn't like crying bc she prides herself on being "perfect" mary

The one who always has her homework done and takes 6 APs and is in 5 extracurricular and is the head of 3 of them and is always in some sort of competion or event and is always w perfect hair makeup outfit and is always composed

Has MANY friends but 2 main friend groups

The valkries and like her "popular" friends (emmeline flo chastity)

Lowkey Dislikes most men as a default

"No one wanted to play with me as a little kid

So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since

To make them love me and make it seem effortless"

^^ that's her

Definition of faking it till u make it but she's "made it" and is still faking

Has minibusses every few wks on whether she even knows her "real" personality

Doesn't care abt fashion THAT MUCH

But she knos every microtrend since the 1960s

Half black and half white

And defo went thru a phase where she told ppl that she was acc only like 1/4th black

Bc all the popular girls in the movies aren't black

Teenage Girl

She spends 4hr every day on hair and makeup b4 school

Will always feel like the Odd One Out

Does Not kno how to read social cues

Loves acting dumb or clueless

Type girl to study for 8hrs for a test then act like she didn't even kno there was a test

Wants to major in robotics

(Mainly bc no1 would expect it and she loves the feeling of vindication she gtes whe she shocks ppl who assume shes dumb)

Low middle income family

But doesnt correct her friends when they assume shes upper middle

Has not been in a designer mall

Style is "boho vintage" and preppy pink

The "boho vintage" is clothes she sewed together instead of buying new ones

She just Gaslight every1 into thinking they were b9ught

Loves her friends to bits and pieces

In primary her friend group was odd numbered so every1 would pair up and leave her out

Now it's even w marlene lily dorcas and her and flo emmeline chastity and her

V territorial of the number of ppl in the group

Once when lily was getting a bit TOO close to alice mary pretended alice sent her death threats and alice gets bullied sm she has to leave the school

Either doesn't offer any personal info to anyone

Or tmis sm u get second hand embarassment

"I wish I wasn't such a narcissist

I wish I didn't really kiss

The mirror when I'm on my own

Oh God, I'm gonna die alone" <- also her

Actively oversexualizes herself to hide the fact that she's scared of sex

Has beef w sirius and peter

Peter bc he's the only person in her hs who was in her primary and so he knos what she was like then and she's terrified he'd told the marauders abt that (he lowkey forgot lol)

Highly problematic

Tries her hardest 2 be nice

But she just isn't

Has stolen countless girls bf

Only to dump the bf 1wk later

And start flirting w the girl

5" 5.5

Loves her hair

She's rjl coded but forces herself to be sob coded

Acc LOVES gory horror movies

Loves ice cream but generally prefers savory > sweet

The og Mirrorball girlie

Tried to start a diary for some "self discovery" but stopped after she realized she was faking it there too

Attractiveness = 75% looks and 25% (fake) confidence

"Please im a star....im a star im a star im a sTAR"

the type of person to Not Say Anything when 1 of her friends make a joke she finds annoying/hurtful and then slowly gets more and more mad at them till she ghosts them

Her aura is somehow both toxic green and pink

Is still v much Scarred from primary so even tho she loves her friends she still has "back up groups" she'd go 2 if her friends unfriended her

Has ghosted 2838383893 ppl

Lowkeg a misandrist

Loves to bake

"I just wanted them to like me 🥺🥺" <- her after destroying her perception of self

Cant cry properly bc she can only think of how stupid she probably looks

"Theyre probably going to cheat on me....i should cheat first"

Ways to show love quality time

Ways to recieve love words of affirmation + phy touch but even tho she gives the best hugs u can't hug her wo 3 days warning

Acc v funny

Like constant banger after banger

Looks like a cinnamon roll thinks she could kill you is a cinnamon roll

Pink lipgloss

Always thinks she takes things a Bit Too Far (she acc kinda does)

like her friend could be shit talking someone and she spends 30min talking abt how disgusting that person is and how gross they are and insults them and reads them to filth. (She doenst even hate that person )

hey I should yap -> pvershares for 2hrs -> wait no ew (post yap clarity) -> cool and mysterious era (20 minutes) -> hey I should yap

Genuinely loves her younger siblings but uses up all her energy at school so at home she's v much a bitch to them

Ev she can't even say I love u to them

Can't even sound the words out

Gen believes she ruined them

Loves : chappell mitski and sabrina

Pathological liar

Lies for no rzn at all

Fav color is yellow

Says it's pink

Loves summer

Says she loves spring

Chat she's a good person when it rlly counts I promise

ev she leaves hs

!! And she gets into her dream uni

Yay!!

And then...

Uh oh

U kno the thing that happens when ppl who were popular in hs can't make friends in college

Yea that's mary

But eventually ?? She gets better ??

She goes out on silly walks

And goes 9ut her home wo a detailed 20 step guideline on what to do and how to act

And takes shitty pictures

And forgives and forgets !!

And she grows closer to the valkries !!

And sings shitty karaoke shittily in shitty pubs

And she forgives peter

And she wears more yellow

and she calls her siblings every other day and doesn't have to pretend to be interested

and listens to "cringe" girly talk podcasts bc they acc help her

and it doesn't matter if her laugh is now a tad bit too loud and if its more like a snort

and if her hips grow a bit bigger

Bc she's Human

She lives n breathes and walks and she Healing omigod shes Healing

she starts living for the experience of living and doesn't view herself in 3rd perspective

and she's seeing w her eyes and not the eyes of others and wow

and in one of her classes she gets an 89

And she cries abit but it's Ok!!

bc she still learned

And mare friends in that class!!

And she was ok she was ok she was ok

she gets her 2nd choice internship

And celebrates messily w all her friends

but when the 1yr internship is over she doenst get a perm job

But it's ok!!!

Bc it was an experience she experienced in her lovely life !!!

U kno those tiktoks that go "me making straberry pancakes bc life didnt end when i was 16"?

Thats her

She dates a girl (!!!)

And they communicate

And she holds her and is held by her

And go on silly cirnge dates

And have meaningless convos

And then they break it off amicably

But it's ok!!!

Bc it was an experience!!!!

"And I couldn't be sure

I had a feeling so peculiar

This pain wouldn't be for

Evermore"

And then she gets invited to an interview at her 1st choice job

And she stares at the building from across the street

And realizes

She Made It

And she closes the street in her yellow pumps

And she's thinking abt what she's gonna write in her journal today and thinking of all her friends and it's all ok now and and OMIGOD IS THAT A TRUC-

she gets run over ://

And dies ://

She would've gotten the job :/

If she hadn't uh died ://

:/

*not as much as my wife @mrstellmeafuckingsecret

[therabbitthatpostthings]

Honestly I understand why everyone in the classroom looks so scared of Uzi. Imagine if you will:

You are a worker drone you live everyday in constant fear of the murder robots outside of your city’s compound. The daughter of the most famous drone in your colony blows up your classroom. She already generally unlikable and standoffish and has taken over the sentience of one of your classmates already. Anyway you go home form school and a couple hours later she rushes in and fights in a 2v2 with a MURDER DRONE AND WINS! That railgun she brought actually does work and totally could have killed you earlier. Yay!

She banishes herself for ONE DAY and you see her at school somewhat more angsty than usual. At the same time, the prom court is disappearing. Then the most popular girl at school invites a murder bot into your school and two drones PLUS UZI fight off the OTHER most popular girl in school.

THEN- a couple weeks (?) later you go on a school trip that wasn’t supposed to be a school trip and the teacher leaves you in the care of the TWO MURDER ROBOTS AND ONE OF THEM SHOT SOMEBODY- AND WHOOPS UZI IS GOING FERAL AND EATING PEOPLE GUESS ILL GET ON THE BUS AND ACT LIKE THIS IS NORMAL AND HALF OF MY CLASS ISNT GONE-

And then- it’s quiet. Uzi’s not in class. Everything is calm for a while. Peace and serenity. And then the planet starts…pulsating??? SUDDENLY YOU ARE LAUNCHED INTO SPACE- GRAVITY IS ALL TYPES OF FUCKY WUCKY. YOU ARE BARLEY KEEPING IT TOGETHER.

And just when things start to go back to normal- GUESS WHOS BACK ITS UZI! She had the audacity to say “maybe we should have stayed behind the doors!���. And she tells you that every scary thing that has happened over the last couple weeks/months has been some scary ass psycho virus that may or may not still be in a good chunk of your classmates (and even if it is- Uzi’s the main admin. Don’t think she told anyone that tho). The murder bots are just CASUALLY in your classroom, SHE’S DATING ONE OF THEM!

And now she do this!

[midnight1nk]

So, this week's episode...

[spoilers below cut]

*GASP*

...

how come the Team does this to me? They get me every. single. time. chat, I don't even want to click on the episode BUT I HAVE TO KNOW IF MY THEORY WAS RIGHT OH WHYYYY

(the following is my live reaction:)

starting off already? well no complaints from me

it's giving "Trust No One" from WOTFI 2023 arc

PFFT HAHAHHAHAHAHA

ok ok ik it's supposed to be serious, but that "wha happen?" audio clip from Mickey Mouse Shorts really caught me off-guard. Who in the Team did that? I want to say thank you

anyway, Mario dude you gotta tell everything, especially to Karen

...well, the minecraft part isn't wrong but he's not telling the whole story

omg 4 really is doing the same thing as 3 did a year ago

which is crazy considering that 4 wasn't in 3's interrogation on Mario. They're so cosmically linked that they came up with the same interrogation method, well it's also Mario we're talking about

yeah, we'll let Karen do the rest

might as well give in, Mario. it ain't worth hiding any secrets

...4?

he's so silly I love him 💙

idk 4, maybe you should be an inspiring VA (4 would be the type of parent who would do all the characters' voices when reading bedtime stories 😌↕️)

oh. oh holy shit.

well at least you're getting it out of your system, Karen. but I do feel genuinely concerned you. I still understand but worried.

the shadows making it look like she's stabbing Mario isn't helping with my concerns

...what was that?

*wheeze* no 4, it's not the IRS

OH we got a sniper here, folks. WPNZ?

AND A ROBOTIC HAND? yeah, we're not just guessing anymore. the anon from my inbox who said that WPNZ may be a cyborg, you nailed it man

Ain't no way, Mario died (he literally cannot)

THE GMOD GUN IS BACK

HOLY SHIT nice save Karen

it's confirmed: 4 doesn't pay his taxes

Mario: "I am..." [*Invincible title card*]

he still got the walkie-talkie.... what the hell did WPNZ say to him?

YEP now we're putting the pieces together

*wheeze* Mario what was that run?

pull some strings, you say? perhaps... CONNECTIONS?

GET EM GIRLS /ref

secretive, ay?

what's with the dark room?

*flashback* I just remembered a traumatizing experience in my past, hang on I have to stim and I'll feel better. /ref

damn Mario ok

oh wait, I recognize this animation style. Anaidon, did you work on this scene? :D

PFFT THE DISTRACTION DANCE FROM THE HENRY STICKMAN SERIES OMG

I did not see that coming, ok who in the Team did that bc that was good haha. nostalgia go brrrrrrrrrr

No, WPNZ, it really did work ngl

oh shit

yep it's a cyborg hand if it's compatible with an actual arm

Gear up, it's for a swell battle!!!

FLAMETHROWER?! even Mario's not liking this

no, 4! this isn't Mario, it's Mr. WPNZ

😦

*pauses episode* ...chat, can you do something for me?

hold me back, and don't let go until I'm done. ready?

*ahem*

...WPNZ YOU SON OF A BITCH WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU AND I SWEAR YOU'RE NOT GOING TO LIVE TO SEE TOMORROW— *10 minutes and a nuke explosion later*

ok I'm good.

4 I'm going to need you to wake up buddy. c'mon you can't die, especially not you. 4 don't do this to me, you can't. you faced way worse stuff before, this can't hold you down now. your friends, your family, they're waiting for you to come back home. you can't leave them. 4 please

WE GOT A PULSE OH THANK GOD

IT'S A WEAK ONE THO, WE NEED TO GET HIM TO A DOCTOR NOW

I KNOW YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO, IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT 😭

at least Karen could finally get some answers

...a surprise?! OH HELL NO that guy nearly got them killed for ENTERING, it's a trap for sure

LET'S GO GET YOUR KIDS BACK but do be careful, we still don't know what we're up against

😭

get 4 outta there!! oh god, is the Crew gonna see 4 in critical condition? Beeg4? *head in hands*

I swear the Team is out to get me (also Mario carrying out 4 strangely reminded me of a scene from a fic I read long ago)

and ofc the whole building on fire goddammit

(btw that fall reminded me of the insomniac spider-man teasers ifykyk)

no Karen, hun you aren't. you're like one of the best parents of the entire show

you're trying to be better and give your kids the life you didn't get to have, that pretty much makes you a good parent overall

YEAH LOCK IN

alright, the moment of truth

huh? radio interference?

I FUCKIN KNEW IT YEP IT'S CONFIRMED

MR. WPNZ IS KAREN'S EX LOVER AND FATHER OF THE KIDS

(well nicc, looks like you get you keep your script after all)

oh, so he's pretty much a psycho, good to know *starts curb-stomping him*

I TOLD YOU ALL THE "HALF PINTS* NICKNAME WAS TOO SPECIFIC

what kinda monster? oh the mentally-messed-up yandere ass one, yeah that kinda monster

HE'S AT THEIR HOUSE?! FUCKFUCKFUCK

ok yeah I see how it is. violence isn't enough, time to commit crimes :)

no, don't end it there. please don't

*flips desk* AND THE MUTED-COLOR CREDITS OH C'MON

looks like I got something else right, it was a mini-arc. it's all within the math

Congrats to daekim_26 for your art being featured at the end credits! 🎉 hey, I recognize this, Ben reblogged this over on Twitter. ig the Team really liked your art

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

I. I'm just speechless omg. Like what am I supposed to say to that? Shadow, is this what you meant when you said we're not prepared for this? I need to walk out a sec, hang on.

ok I'm back. I guess first off, Team, wow. What an episode, it is absolutely insane how good it all was. Especially the writing and the voice acting for Karen, it tugged on my heart strings. And Anaidon, I KNEW YOU ANIMATED THAT SCENE haha!

Genuninely, bravo 👏👏👏 and my calculations were right after all

Actually, for me to post my theory hours before the episode was dropped, I'm surprised how much I got it right. Most of it, yeah, though I didn't expect how insane Mr. WPNZ is. More so doing it for himself and not the corporation, but still a lot of dedication was put into this. And he got a robotic arm! Not exactly like Clench (who has a mind of its own and can talk) but definitely advanced. So, the point could still stand that the tech, skills, and resources were based on his job at Hitman Inc.

Poor Karen, you can tell she's been very desperate in finding her kids by the voice acting alone. You can't blame her for going to these lengths. Like I said, understandable, but I do still feel concerned for her. And then, her psycho ex on top of everything smh, I won't be able to handle it.

And you can't even blame Mario either. He did the mission thinking it would help Karen, and Mr. WPNZ told him what to do. Then with the prosthetic taking Mario's arm, it wasn't even him. It was WPNZ, but I do feel like Mario's going to feel so guilty for what he did to 4.

Wrong things for the right reason 😔↕️

Speaking of 4, NO NOT MY BOY. Chat, I'm not okay. Like I knew he wasn't going to die, he's literally one of the main characters, but my heart dropped at that scene. Through the floor and 6 feet underground. I did ask for 4 angst, yes, but damn. Can you imagine how the Crew would react? Since 3 & 4 are cosmically linked, would 3 feel that 4's in critical condition? Oh Beeg, 4's his dad dude. Beeg may be pretty tough but he still cares for 4, hope he gets a bit of revenge for it. (and a sprinkle of mar4 angst)

...am I going to bring in goop!4 into this?

Who do you take me for? ofc I am. As I mentioned, the parasite would still be in 4, and because of what happened to him, it might be the necessary trigger for it to activate. After everything that had happened to him, the explosion really knocked him out. This is taken seriously, this mini-arc starts really close to the IGBP anniversary.... I wouldn't be surprised if the Team tease for the future goop!4 arc. Not immediately after the Hitman arc, far later. Baby steps, chat. If the Team drops at least ONE frame, a SECOND, about goop!4, I'll take it!

Anyway, since it is a mini-arc, we're not getting another teaser or a trailer. BUT we are getting an episode special, so we'll have to look out for that. In meantime, that's all from me. I'll see yall next time and remember, folks: numbers always go first!

man, Ben. I gotta say, the thumbnail you made, it was a cool reference to the Parasite movie poster. Awesome job!

...huh.

[smallestapplin]

:O Smallest, that was so beautiful! I've never really thought about Thundercracker in that way before but I think I need to rewatch a few things. What iteration of transformers do you think does Thundercracker the most justice? Also, would you be so kind as to share some of your headcannons for him????

Sending you platonic hand kisses - 🏳️‍🌈 anon

I believe it’s the 2005 IDW comics tho I’m not sure which one, but also thank you I love talking about these dorks, I hope you enjoy these romance headcanons.

GN!Reader

-

-

- thundercracker is a bit awkward at first, he’s not really sure how to approach social situations with humans. He’s a bit quiet at first, simply because what would he even ask or talk about? You starting to talk makes him feel better, and helps him ease into an easy conversation. Thundercracker is a stand offish con, always trying to not go beyond some imaginary limit you have to help him through.

- Please show him shitty tv shows, romcoms, or silly but good cartoons, he thrives off them, not only does he get an inside of humanity, but it’s funny and helps fill the silence. He’s mostly weak to romance dramas, and he will yell at the tv like an angry dad watching football, you’d be scared if it wasn’t so funny. He will go quiet and stew in his emotions about it, but then he’s pouting cause CLEARLY her childhood best friend was the better choice-

- After leaving the cons he has more time on his servos, so expect him to go through the media you give in within like a month. Or he calls you randomly, no matter the times sometimes waking you up, just to tell you to look outside, and there is a very familiar blue jet in your backyard. He likes flying you around, the joy you have from it makes him feel complete.

- He’s very protective over Buster, that’s his sweet baby puppy no matter how old she gets, but watching you bond so easily with her, and always coming over with dog food and toys makes his wings flutter in joy.

- Now that you’re a key person in his life, prepare for how protective he is. Thundercracker isn’t controlling or possessive, but he does worry a lot and it shows, he’s always calling to make sure you’re okay, and if you need help cause he will break the sound barrier to get to you.

- He’s very much not into physical affection at first, but its comical how quickly he realizes he likes it and always wants you on his shoulder so you can kiss his cheek. Often likes writing out his scripts or fan works with you on his shoulder, or in his spark chamber, you being close and doing your own things makes him so happy, it makes him feel close to you and comfortable since he trusts you so much.

- Thundercracker treats you like glass, any quick sound you make always makes him jump as he’s so afraid to hurt the one good thing he has in his life. He will never get use to it, and always checks you over for any injuries before carrying you or placing you on his shoulder.

- So, so many kisses, it’s a miricale you can even leave his little hidey hole with how much his dermas are on you. In private, just the two of you, he can’t help but want to kiss you as a thank you for being there for him, choosing him, and loving him of all cybertronians, no doubt you could have some better bot, but you picked him? He’s honored.

- Please for the love of Primus never go through his files on his data pad, the only thing he’s hiding are (in his words) the cringy self indulgent fanfics he wrote when he was longing for you, he can’t bring himself to delete them but he also never wants you to see those of he will offline.

- Date night is a must, or two date nights, or maybe three-

- He’s kind of a sap, a hopeless romantic with his own gruff flare to it. Dropping in randomly for a night time fly, occasionally making you watch him do aerial tricks so he can show off to you and earn your praise, he wants to so more human style dates and see what the hype is, but the issue is you have a 30 foot tall robot boyfriend who isn’t exactly easy to hide.

- WINGS! His wings are a huge part of him and the culture left behind on Cybertron, if you were to pick up on his wing language reading him through the, he would be fighting back tears, he lost so much due to the war and now is not as close to those he called friends who understood his wing movements, showing so deeply that you care about him like this makes his spark swell.

- Speaking of wings, being mostly alone now makes it hard for him to do any touch ups or get a small rock from out of his grooves, when you offer to help don’t be surprised if he rejects you so fast. If it’s not a medical emergency, most flight mode Cybertronians don’t like having their wings messed with unless you are a trusted friend, life partner, family, or conjunx. Thundercracker will come around though, softy apolozing and asking for help, and don’t mention that his engine is making a revving purr like sound, he’s very happy and content, but still embarrassed by his previous actions.

[quirekey]

I love your writing so much! Can I request how heatwave would react to his little human gf when she gets the chance to babysit Cece for the Greene’s and she’s literally like a mom? Even the Burns would be surprised at how good reader is acting with little Cece. Kade would fs tease heatwave as well, saying something like, “she’s loves kids, heatwave. Take notes on that.”

We all know that heatwave secretly loved robo baby in that one episode, and I feel like he feels the same for cece ngl.

Sorry if this seems too descriptive 😞 tysm tho!💛

AWWW THIS IS SO CUTE!! I’m so sorry for coming late, Christmas and stuff! I’m so glad I can write freely now. I’ll do a small introduction as an apology for my late answer >:]

(ALSO TYSMMM GAH)

[ HEATWAVE ] x [ FEMME!READER ]

[ heatwave x human!femme!motherlike!reader ]

INTRODUCTION

You were first introduced to the Rescue Bots due to Kade’s trust in you. You both were really good friends and you somehow had the tolerance to stand Kade on a daily basis. Kade with his loud mouth slipped and told you about the Rescue Bots, Heatwave specifically. Because of this, you met the Rescue Bots and got to know them on a personal level.

Months pass and seemingly Heatwave has been pushing Kade away, bringing himself to be with you more often. You saw him as a gentle soul and he appreciated that. After a while, the little love confessions happen and you both got together. (let’s say he confessed first, bluntly)

Ever since then, you both were lovers. Unfortunately you did not have any training in the field and only knew some medical procedures, so you stayed behind or went with Chief in-case of emergencies or injured civilians.

Mr. Greene trusted you a lot due to your kind and trusting nature, so overtime, he wanted to adjust you to Cece, his daughter. You adored her so when you got to babysit her, it was definitely a fun time for you. That day was a quiet one, so you and Heatwave decided to take care of Cece during the time you guys have together.

HEADCANONS

- When you brought Cece to the department while Cece slept in your arms, the Rescue Bots were definitely surprised. Boulder was the most happy with her appearance due to a past emergency where he was her little frog-plush (something that you can never get over). Chase and Blades didn’t mind too much, but Heatwave did.

- Heatwave was not fond of Cece. Having a fragile baby near massive sentient robots doesn't seem safe, but you assured Heatwave that you can keep her safe.

- You tried to get Heatwave to get along with Cece, constantly getting him to help you take care of her. You even got him to hold Cece, in your vision of course.

- After a while, you picked up Heatwave’s true feelings about little and young sentients (or technically babies). He seemed to be pretty comfortable and fond of them, he seems to be more relaxed with the knowledge that he’s taking care of such a fragile being. You think that he thinks that Cece is pretty wholesome, annoying but fun.

- Cece really likes Heatwave. It’s common that babies enjoy those ‘hard to get’ types of people, knowing deep down that they still care. You saw this so you got Cece to hang around with Heatwave more often than you, and they got along pretty well. Heatwave was too afraid to hurt her so he didn’t do much, trying to make it look like he doesn’t care when he really does.

- You do all of the chores when it comes to taking care of Cece. Changing her nappy, feeding her and bathing her. Heatwave does the comforting and rocking her to bed type of chore. Though you could easily do that yourself, the sight of Heatwave being a parental figure always warmed your heart.

- Though he’s afraid to admit it, Heatwave does get jealous of Cece. Though it’s an absolutely embarrassing secret, when Cece is around, she takes all of your attention away from him. He doesn’t care but the bitter jealousy does linger over him when you are babysitting Cece.

- You enjoy getting Heatwave to turn into a firetruck and driving you and Cece around. Cece giggling and looking outside the window is an adorable sight and Heatwave is way slower and careful when you guys do this. Doing this does help Cece sleep too. Being rocked in a Fire Truck while you told her a story is luxury in her eyes.

- I do agree, Kade does make fun of Heatwave for this A LOT. When Heatwave is helping Cece fall to sleep by telling her a story he was told in Cybertron, Kade always poke fun. He’s usually teasing and snickering at the sight, saying how much of a softie Heatwave really is. All Heatwave could do is keep rocking Cece and ignore Kade’s antics. (Or Heatwave would just tell him to shut up.)

- You gained a deeper understanding of your lover when Chase told you about the time when the Rescue Bots were assigned to take care of Robo-baby. Chase thought it’d be important to mention that Heatwave does enjoy the company of babies and that you can trust him with one. Not like you did before but it was nice to have some reassurance.

[dilatorywriting]

Oh, 4k? Hold up then, looks like you dropped this 👑👑👑

CONGRATS TO YOU, ONE OF THE BEST WRITERS HERE!! If I could partake in the event, I'd love something with Riddle and prompt 17; love my short red angry king and alice in wonderland in its entirety tbh. If the Reader could be a bit of a rule breaker too and have known Riddle since childhood that'd be awesome as well. Again tho CONGRATULATIONS!! HOPE NOTHING BUT THE GOOD STUFF FOR YOU!

Gender Neutral Reader x Riddle Rosehearts Word Count: 2.3k

Prompt 17: "I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do."

[EVENT MASTERLIST]

You were annoying.

At least, that was the kindest way his mother described it. And Riddle would have to agree. Always hanging over his shoulder like some overeager parrot and rattling off nonsense into his ear just as loudly. He was hardly allowed out to the park—mother said his studies were far too important, and even as a child Riddle certainly agreed. Mostly, at least. Enough to never argue—but when he did get time to sit out in the sun under the shade of the grand, painted trees, you were always there.

A bother, a nuisance. Sticky fingered with the remnants of swiped tarts and chattering on, and on, and on.

“I tried to follow a rabbit,” you said, rolling around in the dirt like a heathen. Weren’t you worried your parents would scold you for mucking up the smooth, blue fabric of your jacket? “But it ran too fast and I fell. Do you think I could catch it with a net, maybe?”

“Hopped,” Riddle correctly, stiffly. “Rabbits hop.”

“Well this one ran,” you argued back. “Faster than a car. Faster than a cheetah.”

“Cars are faster than cheetahs,” he said, turning to the next page of his book. “So grammatically you should have put that part second.”

You flopped back onto your stomach and pulled yourself to your knees, before scuttling behind his back and peering over his shoulder.

“How can you pay attention to a book with no pictures in it?”

He hunched up his shoulders and you dropped your chin down with a bonk. Refusing to budge.

“Some of us don’t have the attention span of goldfish,” he sneered, turning his nose up at you.

“Well, if I could only think as much as a goldfish, I wouldn’t want to waste it on that,” you snipped back. “Doing homework in a park. What are you, a robot?”

“I’m efficient!” he snapped. “Mother says I shouldn’t waste time on frivolities.” On things like you, he doesn’t say. A part of him wants to. The part that sounds like biting words and a sharp, firm voice demanding he get to bed by 7pm unless he wants to rot his brain. Another part is… is worried that you might not like that. And then you’d just get even more annoying.

You reached around and snagged the textbook out of his hands with an audible ‘yoink!’ and immediately ran off at full speed. Which is never fair! Because you’re used to climbing up trees, and sprinting through mud, and scaling boulders like a wild beast. And Riddle is—Riddle isn’t! He would never! So it takes him an age to catch up to you. By the time he does, he’s huffing, and puffing, and as red as his hair.

“Don’t do that!” he snapped, livid. “Ever again!”

“Alright,” you shrugged, a loose grin on your mouth as you returned your pilfered treasure. You’ve barely even broken a sweat. “I won’t bother you during homework, Riddle.”

Which is… That’s certainly what he wanted Of course it was. But it made something in his stomach drop nonetheless. Probably because you’d just find new ways to be irritating. Yes. That’s certainly why.

The first time he felt it was on his twelfth birthday.

He’d tried so hard. And he’d done so well. His exams had all come back with perfect scores, his projects and papers immaculately graded. He’d been going to bed on time every night, combing his hair exactly how his mother liked, even folding his clothes into perfectly pressed little squares. She’d seen it in one of her cleanliness magazines and had lamented how nice the style looked for something so tedious. But Riddle had learned. And now his closet looked as tidy as a militia.

“Can I go? Trey’s whole family will be there. And it’s just dinner. Fully monitored!” he reassured, fighting the urge to twist his hands behind his back. “Please?”

“Of course not,” his mother droned, not even looking up from her laptop. “You’ve been doing well, but we don’t want you slipping up, now do we?”

“But—” he started, and her eyes cut up to him like daggers. A warning. “…of course, mother.”

“Good boy,” she smiled, with that smile that was never really a smile. “Now go up to your room. You can have an extra half hour of free time today,” she said, like it was something worth celebrating. “For my special birthday boy.”

Riddle had sat in his bed wishing he’d never known what a birthday was at all. And then there was a tapping at his window.

He opened it in shock, to see you hanging off the edge like a particularly determined cockroach. Which was—! No! It wasn’t safe! And you were going to get him in trouble, and—

But instead of opening that stupid, fat mouth of yours and letting of your siren call of a laugh—summoning every sensible adult in a five-mile radius to come checking for delinquents—you simply swung around a bit to reach back into your jacket pocket. Riddle almost lurched forward when he saw your fingers scrabble a bit along the ledge. Ready to fall. But then you righted yourself and gently deposited a little, paper-wrapped parcel atop of the smooth surface.

And then you shot him a wink and disappeared from view, no doubt scuttling back down the siding like the demon you were.

He approached it hesitantly, like one would an active bomb. He carefully peeled back the sticky tape and smoothed out the edges of the sloppily wrapped package. Inside was a small, round strawberry tart. Freshly baked, by the smell of it. And the waft of warm, soft steam curling up from the flaking crust. With a little note tucked beside it in your chicken scratch. A lopsided smiley face doodled at the corner, beaming up at a hastily scrawled ‘Happy Birthday, Riddle!’

He took a small bite of the little, perfect treat and his eyes burned. Something in his chest gave a worrying thump-thump.

‘Oh my god,’ he thought in a panic. ‘The idiot poisoned me.’

But aside from the horribly loud ticking of his heart, nothing else seemed to go awry. He ate the rest of the tart in silence, feeling lightheaded and far too warm. He wondered if maybe his mother was right about sugar and myocardial infarction after all.

Riddle didn’t see much of you the next few years. His mother doubled down on his study times, and he wasn’t even allowed to spend time with someone as responsible as Trey anymore. Let alone the person his parent had deemed ‘a menace upon polite society.’ The next time he saw you—really saw you. Not just your hurried waves from across the street or the trace ends of your bubbling laugh from around a corner—was when the Royal Sword Academy’s students had descended upon Night Raven for the VDC.

You were chattering away with Che’nya, the pair of you looking equally as mused and ridiculous. All splashes of raucous color and uniforms so out of place that one would hardly be able tell what institution you were meant to be a part of at all. For a moment he thought you’d walk right past. It’d been years, after all. And certainly you’d moved on to bothering some new stick in the mud.

But then you saw him and your eyes lit up. His chest gave another of those terrible thump-thumps.

“Riddle!” you all but screamed. And launched yourself at him like a feral cat. “How are you! Your hair is so neat! Did you grow out your bangs? Oh! Look at your cape! So cool! Did you know that we don’t get capes? I think that’s a crime. Especially with how yours looks,” you rambled on. And despite that lingering thread of him that demanded that you must be annoying, because that’s what you were. Loud, and uncouth, and everything he’d been raised to not be. The rest of him was… Warm. And happy, to hear the familiar chatter back in his ear.

He scoffed, hoping it would cover the noise of his pounding heart. “No one in their right mind would trust you with a cape. You’d get caught on every door in existence.”

“Oh, that’s fair,” you agreed on a nod. “But surely a top hat, at least?”

And then you were back in his life like you’d never left to begin with. Or, well, like he’d never left you.

Showing up at Unbirthday Parties with the tackiest serving plates and even worse outfits. Telling him all about the rabbit you finally managed to catch, and how it does run, Riddle. I swear. Bringing him trinkets you’d found in small shops that had no practical purpose to speak of. Breaking every rule in the Queen’s Book and smacking yourself on the forehead each time he shouted a stern reminder. You even bought a little notepad to jot down his instructions. But all it ended up being good for was an ever growing pile of doodles and little, folded, origami animals that he’d find tucked all around his room like secrets.  

And amidst all of this, that thumping, bumping pressure in his chest just kept getting worse.

It was a warm day, not unlike the one all those years ago where you’d plunked yourself on his shoulder and stolen the textbook right out of his hands. Now you had your own book to read, some monstrosity on analyzing ravens and writing desks, with your head precariously close to his lap but not there. He didn’t even know why that bothered him.

“This book is too complicated,” you complained. And Riddle fought the urge to point out you were holding it upside down. “Both have quills. Is that so hard to understand?”

“That makes no sense,” he argued back.

“Of course it does,” you said, perfectly pleasant and sure of yourself. “But you know everything, so you really ought to know that too.”

He snorted. “I do not.”

“Do too.”

“Do not.”

“What’s fifteen times thirty-four.”

“That’s not knowing. That’s just math,” he argued. “And it’s five-hundred and ten.”

“See,” you poked. “I knew you’d know it.” You rolled over to stretch out on your stomach—reaching forward to twist a long blade of grass between your fingers. “You always know what to do.”

Something in his stomach turned unpleasantly at that. Had he known what to do when he’d cowed to his mother’s commands and cut you from his life? Had he known best when he’d turned away from your warm greetings and friendly overtures to hide away behind the unsurmountable walls of expectation? Worse over, did you think that he thought all those things were… for the best? That he’d wanted to push you aside like all your cheerful banter and sweet attempts to brighten his dull, miserable life had been worth nothing.  

“That’s not true,” he finally said, stilted and near whisper quiet.

You propped yourself up on your elbows and looked at him with a curious tilt of the head.

“Of course it is,” you blinked, guileless and genuine. Smiling up at him from your place in the grass with that familiar, twisty little grin on your mouth and a brightness in your eyes that never seemed to dim.

“It’s not,” he said, a bit firmer. And his gaze flickered off away from yours. “I think I’m in love with you, and I don’t know what to do about it at all.”

Riddle wasn’t sure what he was expecting. Silence, maybe. The horrible, awkward, biting sort that ate away at his soul like a rat gnawing through his bones. Maybe you’d laugh at him, in that bubbling, carefree way of yours, and tell him that you thought one of those rules of his was never to lie on a Thursday afternoon. That would hurt worse than the silence, he thought.

But instead you just rolled back over with a flick of your wrist, like you were gossiping about the weather.

“Then love me,” you said, simple. “I love you. It only seems fair.”

“…oh,” he spluttered, face lighting up crimson and warm.

You hummed, as if in agreement. But to what he wasn’t sure. You looked him over for a minute, like you were searching for something. And then you reached for his sweaty hand with your own and twined your fingers there in the grass.

“If everything always made sense, nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't,” you said, like that was supposed to make any sense at all. “And contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?"

“What on earth are you on about?” he gaped.

You burst into delighted giggles and tucked your nose against his hip. “Silly, silly. Stop trying to analyze everything, yes? It will only make things more confusing.”

You sighed and stretched, a contented smile on your lips. You reached up to tap a finger against his nose.

“Things don’t always have to make sense. That’s what makes it fun. And, well, if you’re really that determined to be able to figure out how things are supposed to go, we can do that later, yes?”

“…Right,” he managed to eek out after a long moment. Feeling far too light and far too… too something. “Later. There will be a later.”

And as much as that would have felt like a lie all those years ago—had been a lie even—when he said it now you looked up at him like he’d hung the stars in the sky. And he couldn’t help but hope for all the tomorrows in the world.

.

.

[illubean]

Valorant Protocol as Highschool Stereotypes

Characters: Chamber, Gekko, Iso, Jett, Killjoy, Neon, Phoenix, Raze, Sage, Skye, Viper, Yoru Type: Headcanons

HAHA help me valorant brainrot >.< also this is based off of my hs experience soooo yeah

Warnings: none

Chamber

your typical pretty boy

all the girls love him all the boys hate him

well...most of the girls love him

they follow him around to classes or offer him gifts or ask to sit with him at lunch etc.

and he eats up the attention every time

he's lab partners with Viper in Environmental Sciences and he likes trying to flirt with her

she actually hates him btw

Gekko

canonically he skateboards

but honestly? I can see him being on the dance team

he's so high energy, he needs some sort of outlet

he never misses an opportunity to show off his dance moves

homecoming? prom? he is the center of the dance circle

like Raze, he doesn't know how popular he is

he's just happy to have so many good friends that it doesn't even actually occur to him that he's considered "popular"

Iso

he's an ap art kid

like he walks around with a big ass sketchbook every day

always talking about his portfolio

Iso baby ily but please shut the fuck up about oil paints <3

he probably volunteered part of his summer break to come in and paint a mural for the school

I think he'd also take a piano class as like a schedule filler but he actually gets crazy good at it

Jett

pe tryhard

if you end up on the opposite team as her while playing dodge ball good luck 😓

she's always picked as team captain because literally no one else is excited as she is

she's sorta like Hairo from Saiki K 💀

she gets a lil mad when her teammates don't try

Killjoy

she's in robotics club

she's not very popular but that doesn't bother her at all

she heads straight to and from every class and spends her lunch period in the workshop unless Raze drags her off somewhere

not a lot of people actually know who she is, and if they do they just know her as 'Raze's Friend'

i think she'd remind the teacher about the homework and hit you with the "erm actually 🤓" tbh

Neon

she's on track and field/cross country

after every meet you can find her laying on the floor somewhere ready to puke bc she tries so hard to win 😭

she always ends up top 5 tho

she complains about practice but joins the team every year anyways

she carries her bag around all the time and if you open it there's like 10 water bottles in there

#hydratedqueen

Phoenix

theater kid DUHH

he's probably drama club president or sumn

bro will NOT let go of a specific song from a musical he was in his freshman year and it wasn't even his song 💀

he's been in every show every year and somehow he manages to land every role he wants

he's insanely good at the game 'bang' (mostly because he's louder than everyone else...)

he probably plans/hosts the cast parties too

Raze

she doesn't care much about her grades

she does the bare minimum and gets straight Cs

she's just here to have fun

everyone likes her because of her approachable personality

she doesn't think she's popular but she is

Sage

she's in the medical assistant class

she takes it very seriously, as she plans on going to medical school

even before taking the class she carries a first aid kit and other essentials everywhere she goes

you need a bandaid? ibuprofen? a pad or tampon? she has it all

she's also ASB president

school events literally would not be able to run without her

lets just say her college applications/resume will look REALLY good...

Skye

she also took medical assistant but was less crazy about it than Sage

she just follows her friend's lead

she thinks the skills are useful but she doesn't see herself making it her career

but also I think she would play volleyball

she's a well rounded player but specializes most in defense

still, don't underestimate her bc this girl can SPIKE

Viper

she took every ap science class offered without taking the general ones first

she complains about getting any grade below an A...

"What are you talking about? That test was easy"

sorry not everyone is as smart as you Sabine 😑

she spends all her free time at chem tutoring (even though she doesn't need it)

Yoru

he thinks he looks cool and mysterious when he walks down the halls but he doesn't

everyone just thinks his mad all the time and stay out of his way 😭

randos try to pick fights with him bc he "looked at them wrong" (Yoru wins every time)

he's not exactly a 'quiet kid' but he does lay low when it comes to the social part of school

despite his 'bad boy' look, he has pretty good grades

he's also probably one of those guys that a handful of girls have a crush on but he has no idea