#die or be dead there is no in-between B^]

[vaultsixtynine]

deep sigh.

[animusrox]

MY LETTERBOXD

TOP 10

1.    Dune: Part Two 2.    The Substance 3.    Hundreds of Beavers 4.    Anora 5.    Dìdi 6.    Nosferatu 7.    Nickel Boys 8.    The First Omen 9.    Sing Sing 10.    Civil War

GRADE A 

11.    No Other Land 12.    Robot Dreams 13.    The Peasants 14.    Conclave 15.    Smile 2 16.    Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes 17.    We Grown Now 18.    Memoir of a Snail 19.    The Last Stop in Yuma County 20.    A Real Pain 21.    It’s What’s Inside 22.    Red Rooms 23.    Sometimes I Think About Dying 24.    A Different Man 25.    Better Man 26.    The Brutalist 27.    Heretic 28.    His Three Daughters 29.    Hard Truths 30.    Evil Does Not Exist 31.    Late Night with the Devil 32.    Alien: Romulus 33.    MadS 34.    Rebel Ridge 35.    Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person 36.    Challengers 37.    Strange Darling 38.    Flow 39.    All We Imagine as Light 40.    Longlegs 41.    Saturday Night 42.    The Apprentice 43.    Terrifier 3 44.    The Seed of the Sacred Fig 45.    A Complete Unknown 46.    A Quiet Place: Day One 47.    Juror #2 48.    Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl 49.    Oddity 50.    Kneecap 51.    Touch 52.    Mayhem! 53.    The Order 54.    In a Violent Nature 55.    Small Things Like These 56.    Twisters 57.    Hit Man 58.    Woman of the Hour 59.    Stopmotion 60.    The Wild Robot 61.    Deadpool & Wolverine

[Tap 'Keep Reading' For My Full Graded List]

GRADE B

62.    The Devil’s Bath 63.    The Bikeriders 64.    Sasquatch Sunset 65.    The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim 66.    Monkey Man 67.    Last Straw 68.    Abigail 69.    Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga 70.    Tiger Stripes 71.    The Book of Clarence 72.    The Instigators 73.    I’m Still Here 74.    The Coffee Table 75.    The Return 76.    Problemista 77.    Trap 78.    MaXXXine 79.    Love Lies Bleeding 80.    You’ll Never Find Me 81.    Between the Temples 82.    Marmalade 83.    Blitz 84.    Speak No Evil 85.    Asphalt City 86.    Piece By Piece 87.    Wicked Little Letters 88.    We Live in Time 89.    Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story 90.    V/H/S/Beyond 91.    The Dead Don’t Hurt 92.    Suncoast 93.    Maria 94.    My Old Ass 95.    Immaculate 96.    The Truth vs. Alex Jones 97.    Cuckoo 98.    Daddio 99.    We Were Dangerous 100.    The Outrun 101.    Infested 102.    Monolith 103.    Azrael 104.    The Last Showgirl 105.    Babes 106.    The Fire Inside 107.    Lisa Frankenstein 108.    Here 109.    Thelma 110.    Queer 111.    Out of Darkness 112.    Y2K 113.    Handling the Undead 114.    Bad Boys: Ride or Die 115.    I Saw the TV Glow 116.    Arcadian 117.    Transformers One 118.    Never Let Go 119.    The Piano Lesson 120.    Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F 121.    Wicked 122.    Gladiator II 123.    Carry-On 124.    Blink Twice 125.    Self Reliance 126.    Fly Me to the Moon 127.    Boy Kills World 128.    Kinds of Kindness 129.    Nutcrackers 130.    Skincare 131.    Ezra 132.    The Front Room 133.    Mothers’ Instinct 134.    Inside Out 2 135.    Omni Loop 136.    Girls State 137.    Beetlejuice Beetlejuice 138.    Your Monster 139.    Babygirl 140.    Mufasa: The Lion King 141.    The Greatest Hits 142.    Horizon: An American Saga - Chapter 1 143.    Magpie

GRADE C 

144.    The People’s Joker 145.    Nightbitch 146.    Road House 147.    Young Woman and the Sea 148.    Am I OK? 149.    Music by John Williams 150.    The Killer’s Game 151.    Oh, Canada 152.    Wolfs 153.    Sting 154.    The Idea of You 155.    Don’t Move 156.    1992 157.    Werewolves 158.    The Killer 159.    The Shadow Strays 160.    Rez Ball 161.    MoviePass, MovieCrash 162.    The Fall Guy 163.    Lee 164.    The End 165.    Godzilla × Kong: The New Empire 166.    The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare 167.    Madame Web 168.    Caddo Lake 169.    Watchmen: Chapter II 170.    Watchmen: Chapter I 171.    Salem’s Lot 172.    The Exorcism 173.    The Watchers 174.    Kill 175.    Jackpot! 176.    Rumours 177.    Damsel 178.    My Spy: The Eternal City 179.    Drive-Away Dolls 180.    IF 181.    Spaceman 182.    Joy 183.    Joker: Folie à Deux 184.    Megalopolis 185.    Monster Summer 186.    Lovely, Dark, and Deep 187.    Bob Marley: One Love 188.    Kraven the Hunter 189.    Moana 2 190.    I Used to Be Funny 191.    Goodrich 192.    September 5 193.    Hold Your Breath 194.    Apartment 7A

GRADE F

195.    The Platform 2 196.    Arthur the King 197.    Shirley 198.    Back to Black 199.    Land of Bad 200.    Poolman 201.    Emilia Pérez 202.    The Room Next Door 203.    I.S.S. 204.    Brothers 205.    Knox Goes Away 206.    Mean Girls 207.    Krazy House 208.    Slingshot 209.    Mr. Crocket 210.    Argylle 211.    Sonic the Hedgehog 3 212.    Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey 2 213.    Afraid 214.    Tuesday 215.    Spellbound 216.    Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths Part Three 217.    Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths Part Two 218.    Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths Part One 219.    The American Society of Magical Negroes 220.    Subservience 221.    Time Cut 222.    Night Swim 223.    Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire 224.    Red One 225.    This Is Me…Now 226.    Despicable Me 4 227.    The Union 228.    Ricky Stanicky 229.    The Beekeeper 230.    Honeymoonish 231.    Hot Frosty 232.    The Deliverance 233.    The Garfield Movie 234.    Lift 235.    Atlas 236.    Trigger Warning 237.    House of Spoils 238.    Borderlands 239.    Tarot 240.    Venom: The Last Dance

Bottom 10

241.    Imaginary 242.    Unfrosted 243.    It Ends With Us 244.    Dear Santa 245.    The Crow 246.    The Strangers: Chapter 1 247.    Harold and the Purple Crayon 248.    Rebel Moon - Part Two: The Scargiver 249.    Dirty Angels 250.    Miller’s Girl

[oceantornadoo]

ch11 something borrowed something blue (mafia!price x simon's sister!reader)

tw: a little piss bc reader is refused a toilet. some light torture scenes and violence.

masterlist | next

“Where. Is. She.” Ghost slams John against the wall, his forearm to John’s throat. The man’s snarling, an unrestrained beast in a mask. The world zeroes in on the gaze between them, the terrible acceptance that they have a shared weakness. A shared weakness who is gone, potentially dead. All they can do is beat the rotted carcass of this feeling until it breaks. 

Thirty minutes earlier

For the past two hours, there’s been something vibrating under John’s skin. It was there when he pulled Gaz by his collar in the store, searching the man’s eyes for deceit. It was there when he eventually let him down, satisfied with the steel reflecting back at him. It was there when someone handed him his wife’s phone, the screen filled with unread text messages from him asking to get dinner and talk it all out. It followed him all the way to the Castle.

Gaz relocates them quickly, saying he has more devices back at home. John’s home, your home, your shared home. The whole car ride John’s knee shakes up and down, nervous energy permeating the air. All he does is replay your last conversation over and over. 

“I am trapped, John.”

“No matter how I feel about you now, I didn’t pick this marriage.” 

“I can’t even tell if you like me for me or my proximity.”

“I need to go to work before I say something I’ll regret.”

The words swarm through his head like wasps, picking at the insecurities he hides everyday. The worries that you wouldn’t pick him in a normal world, that this has been pillowtalk to pass the days. If you love something you’re supposed to let it go, but he can’t decide between being noble and hoarding you until you forget what life was like before captivity. And of course, all of these thoughts assume you’re alive. He hasn’t let himself consider the full possibility that Shepherd has hurt you in ways that would defile your mind and your body, never leaving you whole again. It all coalesces into an evil energy, vibrating under his skin as the London streets roll by outside the car.

Gaz leads John into the security room with words not meant for him. Murmurs to the house staff, directions ordered over ear pieces. They blur and buzz in John’s eardrums, these damn wasps becoming parasites. He’s too old to consider hunting you himself, knows that he has to trust his man, but the urge is there anyways. Thoughts of escalating into straight warfare, bombing Shepherd’s home without any care for the innocents within. 

That’s what he’s thinking about when Ghost arrives, dragging in coattails of vengeance and dread.

Now

“Stand down, Ghost. This ain’t helpin’.” He croaks out against the pressure in his throat. Ghost’s eyes flare, soulless black pits that see too much. They search John’s, within and around, poking and prodding at the emotions he’s been holding in for the hour since he learned his wife is gone. Whatever Ghost finds is enough, John deemed worthy not to die by the loosening of Ghost’s grip. They pant as one, wishing they had never let themself love a woman enough to destroy their dynasties for her.

The world resumes as Ghost turns away. No one mentions the threat, the way John would have let the guilt drown him if Ghost didn’t. John should have pushed harder, should’ve accompanied you to the store instead of letting you go in his shirt with a faint goodbye on your lips. Like you knew what would happen and went anyway, just to see how far his heart could stretch until it tears.

MacTavish is murmuring low calming words to Ghost, unintelligible over the hum of computers and screens. In this room, all pretense is given up, one man’s hand stroking the other’s. To have a half of a soul live outside the body is a dangerous thing, even more when attacks come from all sides. If he squints, there’s a flash of your glare in Ghost’s, the same half-tilted frown hidden by the mask. It’s like you’re haunting him, no, taunting him with the fact that he’s lost you and now he has to deal with your ghost. It’s all his fault, but he lets the pity fester inside instead of releasing it on everyone else.

“Update, Garrick?” Another croak, a near two minutes after the incident. This is why Gaz is his heir - all he does is hand John the nearest iPad without a mention as to what happened. John reads the screen fast, a list of possible abandoned warehouses near Shepherd locations. It makes sense but the timing is all wrong. He’d expected this if things had been quiet, but there was another scrap between Price men and Shepherd men last night. This kidnapping must have been calculated by someone separate, someone like Phil with a solo mission. He should’ve killed the man when he found out he was working (almost) alone with his wife.

“It’ll be somewhere symbolic. Shepherd likes to make a statement.” Garrick mentions. John hands the tablet silently to Ghost, an offering of peace. In the corner of his eye, he can see MacTavish conferring with Mare, the head of the weapons team, speaking a language only the two of them know. The man frowns, then shakes his head at something Mare says. “Dinnae work like tha’.” It travels over the distance of the room, confusing John enough that he walks over to learn what’s happening.

“Report?” Mare is a bit skittish but cool-headed in times of need, the reason he hired the first ever woman on a Price Family leadership team. He trusts her and her chemistry degrees, plus her sense of urgency. “Sir, we’ve just received word that the weapons stores have been compromised.” It’s like a pin drop, other conversations falling silent as she speaks. “Meaning?” He asks, toeing the line of impatience. “Shepherd’s men struck last night, around the same time as the street fight. We believe it was coordinated between that and the kidnapping to hide it as long as possible. They cut the WiFi, so we only found out during the shift change. All the guards were killed and the weapons taken.” 

John prides himself on acting like a real corporate boss, restrained and professional. However, this is his last fucking straw. “You’re saying Shepherd took my fucking weapons, then my fucking wife? How the hell does this happen?” Ghost grunts at the word ‘wife’ but John ignores it, too focused on the situation at hand. Instead of answering, Mare’s eyes flit around the room. Since it was converted from two bedrooms, it fits up to thirty people and is currently at capacity. He can read his employee too well, and knows she’s nervous about the many ears around. While he usually trusts his people with his life, it’s been an odd day and he decides to err on the side of caution. 

“Mare an’ everyone related t’ me, this way.” There’s an elevator to the upper floor in the back of the room. Ghost and MacTavish fall in line, but Garrick seems frozen and unsure. “Gaz, that includes you.” They don’t acknowledge the head nod, brushing elbows as John hits the elevator button. Once all five are in, John hits the emergency stop between floors, leaving them in purgatory. “Speak.” He instructs Mare.

“There’s a mole. It’s the only way they could have gotten in. I designed that facility myself, sir, and there’s no way they could have gotten in with the tools and soldiers they have. Unless our intel was wrong, and I don’t think it was, we have a rat.” Her words echo in the metal chamber. She meets MacTavish’s eyes and he nods in confirmation. 

“Price.” Ghost grunts, his first words in a while. “It’s someone in that room. They’d hav’ to be on yer security.” John nods at his words and turns to Gaz. “How much longer to narrow down locations?” The man still seems flustered by John’s earlier words and needs a nudge to the shin to spit it out. “An hour, tops. We’re thinking of an abandoned weapons facility or church. Something about what he stole, weapons or marriage.” John grunts at the symbolism of it all. “I’m the first one there.” He demands. “Sir, I-” John turns to look his second in the eye. “I’m the first there.” Gaz nods. John turns back to Ghost and MacTavish, staring at him with twin glares of violence.

“Right, men. We got a rat t’ catch.”

-

“You don’t know what I’d do to find ya and keep ya.”

John’s words echo through your mind as you eye Phil, standing in the corner with a water bottle. You haven’t peed since this morning, 12 hours ago, and he knows. Taunting words sung with a Southern accent, promising a toilet in return for the weapon codes. He’s banking on your embarrassment, that you won’t want to piss yourself in this hellhole. Too bad for him you don’t like to listen to what men tell you to do.

“C’mon, sugar. Know ya got t’ go. Give me the codes an’ I got a nice lil’ bathroom for you. Even has one of those bidets.” You shake your head, refusing. Your bladder is pushing against your stomach, tension growing with every breath. It wouldn’t be too bad if he hadn’t kept feeding you water. You think you’re on bottle six now, what seemed like a blessing turned into a curse.

“Fine. Time f’ another one.” He unscrews and steps to your side, checking your handcuffs before coming near your mouth. It’s like he’s under orders not to hurt you physically. There’s been no beatings, no threat of knives or guns. He needs you alive, and you’re pretty sure you know why. The weapons require both a code and an eye scan, something you can’t fake with a dead body. Johnny created the code section and Gaz added the eye scan later, his coding skills a thing of beauty. His quick thinking is the only thing keeping you alive.

Water pours down your throat. He presses down your tongue to force you to swallow every last drop. When he leans over you, it’s like rose-colored glasses have been removed. His blond hair is limp, face sweaty with concentration. Gone is the charming assistant, bright and fun. You bet he needs you to stay alive for his own safety, his life relying on it.

As water slips into your belly, the pressure to pee goes stronger. With a dirty hand, he pushes on your stomach, and you whine in discomfort. He shouldn’t be touching you, especially in a place so sensitive. The loss of body autonomy is your biggest fear, whether it be motherhood or this. Only John would understand, you think, berating yourself for being so stupidly stubborn. That’s when you make up your mind, to still have control over the one thing you can.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. You’re fuckin’ disgusting, you dirty bitch.” The piss soaks your jeans and, with enough force, dribbles on his shoe. Phil jumps away in disgust, eyes hardened into flint as he glares at you. “Fuck you.” You spit out. A glob of it lands near his shoe, making him jump again. You almost pity how weak he is enough to torture a woman for a living. Almost.

“You’re gonna be sorry you did that.” He bites back. Phil glances at the mirror and for the first time in hours, you let yourself feel a lick of fear. You’re pretty sure you know who his boss is, someone too violent for the games you’re playing. “You’re pathetic, you know that?” Is what you can muster. Instead of answering, he shakes off his shoe and knocks on the door. When it opens, there’s a person in full PPE, holding a metal tray with a filled syringe. You jolt back, but the chair is bolted to the ground and doesn’t allow you to move.

“Wait, please, Phil-” He’s fast, shooting something into your arm. Everything goes dark after that.

-

Gaz was right. It only took an hour. 

But it takes longer than that to rule out each location. It’s been 24 hours, and they haven’t found you yet.

John insists on checking out every place by himself, as does Ghost. They’re even-keeled enough to split up to make it go faster but insist on Gaz scrounging up more earpieces so they can keep in constant contact. They slept in shifts too, six-hour blocks once it hit midnight, so they weren’t trudging through their search. Johnny stays back to work with the engineers on testing the security system he designed, while Gaz comes along with whoever is searching. The four of them stay on their own radio channel like a task force, acting more military than mafia. 

They start from the inner city and expand outwards. It’s methodical. It’s calculated. It’s the exact strategy Gaz planned months ago when the marriage was proposed. He’s the clearest headed out of all of them but there’s still a bite to his tone, a tension in his shoulders, a furrow in his brow. If John wasn’t so out of it himself, he’d be glad that his right-hand man seems to care for his wife. 

They sweep warehouses top to bottom. John tugs on every alliance he has, every favor owed. They get pledges of loyalty from smaller gangs, who do their own searches as well. It’s so much and yet not enough because John Price does not have his fucking wife in his hands. Your shampoo scent is not in his nose, your laughter is not in his ears, your waist is not in his grasp. You are gone and he is at fault for not protecting you.

“Focus, Price.” They’ve both slept and are now in their third church in the past 90 minutes. It’s abandoned like the rest of them, creaking doors and blown out windows. They’ve gotten into a rhythm now, sweeping the building efficiently. You’re not there. They finish in twenty minutes, Gaz outside on the phone with the rest of the crew. When they emerge, he stands tall at attention. 

“Sir, we’ve got a hit.”

-

“How you feeling, hun?” The world is woozy, half-tilt on a rollercoaster. You sway from right to left, only steadying when firm hands grasp your shoulders. Your eyes flutter, vision blurring in technicolor. You’re somewhere else, with paintings on the walls and carpet on the floors. That’s when you do a body scan and realize you’re not in the clothes you were kidnapped in.

You jerk away from the man touching you. The wooden chair you’re strapped to falls to the floor and takes you with it. He tries to pick you up, moving in a blur of dark grey, but you thrash away like a fish out of water. His touch is poison, and you fear it was him who undressed you, him who saw you naked against your will. “Get away from me!” You screech, vocal cords sore from disuse. The man’s hands are gnarled crooked things, clawing at your shoulders until your chair is straight again. You try to flinch but your miniscule reactions are still slurry from whatever you were injected with. Once you’re straight, you bite back a gasp.

It’s him. The General. Shepherd. 

Square face with a buzzcut. Weathered and old with a cruel gleam in his eye. He sits back down into a chair in front of yours. This one is red leather, squeaking comfortably with weight as he sits down. The man was in the army in a past life, hence the styling of The General. He wears dark slacks and an army-like jacket. The bravado of it disgusts you. A title like that should be earned, not worn like play clothes. You put on your brave face and sneer at him, a cat backed into an alley.

“I see why John likes you.” He looks you up and down like he can see through your clothes. You flinch against your will. “You don’t deserve to say his name.” You bite. He laughs jarringly. “Fucking brat is what you are. Even got Phil under your spell.” That’s news to you. It’s certainly at odds with his behavior. You don’t react, easing your features into a smooth mask.

“I don’t know why I’m here. I don’t have the codes.” He stares at you dead-eyed. “Not necessary. We don’t need the codes.” He’s bluffing. You’re willing to bet your life on the hard work of Johnny and Gaz. There’s absolutely no way, no workaround. That’s when you get an idea.

“Oh yeah? You’re just going to put me in front of the eye scanner and go from there?” He frowns like you’ve figured out his plan. You almost laugh. “Too bad. You’re still missing a step.” That reels him in. Shepherd sits forward, elbows on his knees, searching your gaze for a lie. You raise your brows defiantly. “What, don’t tell me you haven’t figured it out?” He squints harder at your words. 

“My brother’s old school. Doesn’t trust technology, or anybody else.” It’s certainly true. Simon’s well-known for not trusting people. Even the General looks intrigued. “What are you sayin’?” He murmurs. It’s like you’re holding a prophecy in his hands. Men are so easy.

“There’s a key.” He scoffs and looks away. “And I’m Robin Hood.” You shrug, leaning back as much as you can into your chair despite the ropes tying you to it. “Believe what you want. I’m just saying, my brother has more checks than you can imagine.” Another truth to reel him in. He scratches an invisible itch on his knee, then gets up. He pulls something from his pocket, and you flinch, thinking it’s a gun. He laughs at your reaction. “Fucking brat.” He murmurs. Shepherd turns to the corner of the room and calls someone, talking in low tones.

When you examine the room, it sends a shot to your heart. You’re in a church. There’s blood red carpeting with paintings everywhere, but it’s not wellkept. There’s dust and no windows, the lighting frail. Perhaps recently abandoned?

Shepherd is back, knife in hand. He thrives on watching you flinch and thrash as he comes closer. You stop when he’s in your face, knife trailing down the length of your nose. “Where’s the key?” You answer without hesitation. “My father’s grave.” It’s the kind of sick shit Ghost would do, and Shepherd knows it. That’s when the knife slips through your ropes, freeing you. There’s a gun in his other hand pointed straight at your head. “You’ll take me to the key. And if it’s not there, so help me God, I’m blowing your brains out on your father’s grave.” You nod, short and shallow.

It’s only halfway up the dilapidated wooden stairs when you hear it. Pounding footsteps and a low British tone. Shepherd was stupid enough to trail behind you, and even stupider to stop at the noises as well. That’s when your years of self-defense classes with Johnny kick in, quite literally. 

You aim a kick to his head. He dodges, of course, but all that body mass has to go somewhere, and quite slowly. It knocks him off balance, a half-step down, giving you enough leverage to elbow the nose. One of the most sensitive places on a man, as Johnny told you. The door above you opens as Shepherd gets one more insult in as he goes down.

“Fuckin’ bastard.”

-

Yes i was thinking of the 21 savage song snitches and rats

Also sorry for comparing motherhood to torture i just really needed to justify reader peeing LOL

Oops shes a girlboss SORRYYYYYY

-

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[loganficsonly]

Logan smut where reader and Logan are in an established relationship, shes a mutant too and right after him and Wade save the timelines, she gets mad because she thought they were both dead, then Logan spends the whole night with some “I’m sorry I scared you” sex

MMM THISSSS

this is hot but i've modified it so that the relationship between mutant!reader and logan happens afterwards? i just can't imagine the logan we see in dp&w having an established relationship 😭 sorry, though i don't think this little detail matters much in the writing below!

thank you for sending this in <3

"i thought i lost you" sex with worst!logan

gn!reader, 1.4k (it's poetic that each part is 701 words lmao) WARNINGS: 18+ MDNI please this is smut!!!, rough sex, slight angst, injuries/mentions of injuries and blood, established relationship, reader has mutant powers (sound manipulation), reader has hair, UNEDITEDDD we die like johnny storm being skinned by cassandra AUTHOR'S NOTE: i don't think i knew exactly what i was doing here... hope this doesn't disappoint

If he's the one who got seriously hurt:

He comes back home, blood on the suit. His, theirs, it doesn't matter anymore. It shouldn't have been that close of a fight, that much he knows.

You stare at him as he closes the door to your shared apartment, fingers numb from being curled into worried fists. He kicks off his boots and unzips his suit, not meeting your eyes.

You watch quietly. He doesn’t need heightened senses to detect the tension in the air.

He stands in front of you, naked save for his pants, as if trying to placate you with the sight of him unharmed. See, he’s fine. Nothing to worry about. He heals. He’s alive.

But when he finally looks at you and sees the mix of emotions burning in your eyes, he knows it’s not enough.

They’re red. Have you been crying?

 You finally speak. “It was supposed to be three days,” you say quietly.

His heart sinks, hears your bare feet close the distance between the two of you. Your words are spoken through gritted teeth. 

“You were gone for seven, Logan.” 

Before he can wrangle a word out of his dry throat, he feels your arms hug him tight, and quickly returns it, stroking your hair.

Then there’s wetness on his chest—tears. Your tears. He made you cry. 

“Sweetheart,” he rumbles, trying to put the words together in his head, but he’s not even sure what to say.

You lean up, kissing him. It’s soft and tentative, like he’ll disappear if you push further. His larger hands cup your face, holding you in place as he deepens the kiss, thumbs brushing the tears off your cheeks. 

“Tried to echo-locate you,” you whisper between kisses, “b-but couldn't—didn’t know if you were alive or dead—”

His hands wrap around you tighter. “Honey, I’ll only be dead when you are,” he shudders against your lips, “till then, I ain’t gonna leave you alone.”

It’s slow. He lets you set the pace. Allows your hands to trace the veins on his arms while he kisses you dizzy, like you don’t already have them memorized. Tips his head back to make room for your lips on his throat, chest heaving with need.

Delicate brushes of your lips gradually turn to open-mouthed kisses on his skin, as if making sure this is really your Logan. 

As the heat climbs, he rids you of your clothes, hands sinking into the familiar plush of your flesh after knowing only death for so long. God, you’re soft… His eyes zero in on the way his fingers grip your thighs.

When you sink yourself on top of him, his blood rushes with emotion, a strangled groan escaping him. Warm. Tight. He wants more. 

There is a familiar sensation then. The shrinking of space, or rather the space of sound. You’ve blocked it out, like you sometimes do when you’re intimate with him.

The silence is loud when it hits him—no more traffic, no more construction. Not even the buzz of electricity remains within the tangle of your bodies. Only the sounds of your labored breathing as you try to fit all of him, his broken grunt when he feels himself bottoms out.

Just you and him. The outside world no longer exists.

“Fuck, honey…” he purrs, feeling you clench around him. 

Hazel eyes are dazed and dilated, but you feel their intensity as they burn, taking in the sight of you perched on his thighs. There’s a sheen of sweat that makes you glow, hair sticking to your face, your hands on his chest. 

“Logan,” you whimper, a thousand emotions bundled into those two syllables. I was so scared. I thought I lost you. Please don’t leave me.

He shushes you gently, palms snaking up to your waist, urging you to grind on him.

It only takes you one taste of that sweet friction. There are no more tears now. No more fear or anxiety. You feel full—figuratively and literally.

Moans entangled when you do. The friction is salvation, proof that the two of you are here, together. He pulls you in, mouth on your jaw, fingers on your chest, and then he thrusts up into you.

“A-ah—”

“I’m home, sweetie, I’m home.”

If you’re the one who got seriously hurt:

He was there with you on that same mission. When your body dropped to the ground it felt like his life was over.

From there it was static. The noise is drowned out and he can’t even hear his own roar. A blur of checking your vitals, carrying you someplace safe, cleaning you up.

When you come to, the first thing you notice is a sharp ringing in your ear. No doubt the aftereffect of the device they specifically put there to disable your powers.

And then a few things all at once. You’re in your apartment, on your bed. Your body seems fine, only minor cuts littering your arm. But the world still looks too bright, your bones too heavy, and your head groggy.

Logan is by your bedside, arms crossed while seated in a chair, head lolled forward. Asleep.

“Logan…?”

Just like that, he snaps awake, a guard dog triggered by a keyword. He scans you up and down, as if some new injuries might have manifested in you while he was out of it. You smile sheepishly. 

“I’m okay,” you groan, sitting up against the pillows. No pain. That’s good. “Geez, I should feel special. Who would’ve thought they’d prepare a sonic reverser just for me?”

“You shouldn’t have been there.” His voice cuts sternly.

“Wha—”

“Could’ve died,” he barks, rage knitted onto his face. You freeze.

His hand moves, placing it against your jaw, tilting your face to meet his as he rises from the chair. 

“But I didn’t—”

In a swift movement, he’s on top of you, the bed sinking with his weight. Arms cage the sides of your head as he sinks into the crook of your neck, all lips and teeth. You let out a surprised moan while he sucks on your throat with the intent of leaving a mark.

The look he gives you when he pulls away is wracked with guilt.

He doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t need to. You understand.

So you let his body press against yours, drag his lips all over yours, snake his hand up your shirt. It’s overwhelming, but it’s him. The warmth of his palm, the scent of his shirt. Him. 

Fingers work on your clothing, desperate to feel more of you. You’re naked under him, and he leans in immediately, lips on your chest, hand on your waist and between your legs.

You mewl, feverish with pleasure as he uses a hand to pleasure you like it’s his right. He’s unforgiving, relentless, mouth pulling away from your chest to watch your face as you squirm and writhe under him.

He makes you cum with his fingers twice, only giving you a moment to breathe once you’re ruined. Cheeks flushed, voice hoarse, sweat misting your skin.

Then he flips you over, laying you on your stomach, a hand locking both your wrists above your head. Your breath hitches as he tugs at your hips with his other hand, lifting it high in the air before parting you and—

“Oh my god,” you cry out, voice muffled by the pillow when he sinks his inches in.

You feel his chest against your back, panting against your ear as he pulls back before snapping his hips into you. You moan again, feeling like it’s too much, but it’s not nearly enough.

He takes you just like that, body glued to yours, claiming you with each roll of his hips against yours. You’re left babbling unintelligible noises of pleasure beneath him, too far gone to mind your own voice.

At one point when he lets your wrists go to tug at your hair, making you arch, you let out a loud “ah!”—to which he’d have teased the shit out of you and told you to mute the room for the outside world, but not this time.  

This time, he doesn’t care if the two of you get evicted.

Logan doesn’t stop until you’re a mess, pumped full of his cum, devastated by desire. He grunts as he pulls himself out, dilated pupils examining the bite marks he’s left on your shoulders and upper back.

“Not gonna let anything happen to you again,” he murmurs, kissing the top of your head.

[charmedimsure]

uuuhhhhhm can i pretty pretty please with cherries on top request a Dae-ho x reader where the reader was also in the military? but its like that ep. where they revolutionized? if that makes sense? idk i think it be cool if reader eas good eith a gun

anyways HAVE A LOVELY DAY/ NIGHT love reading your stuff (i binge read it :p)

WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT || kang dae-ho

pairing: Kang Dae-ho x gn!reader

summary: As a former soldier, you know just what to do when all hell breaks loose.

word count: 3.7k

warnings: guns, death, blood, squid game stuff, panic attacks, ptsd

A/N: i've played so many shooting games i feel like i've been training to write this fic my entire life. i even named it after a shield from my favorite game (brownie points if you know which game). if you find any mistakes no you didn't <3 tried to make this gender neutral but if you find any slip ups lmk so i can fix it

**this can be read as romantic or platonic**

You look at the woman standing between bunks with wide eyes. You weren't sure earlier when you saw her on the screen, but seeing her standing ten feet away from you, you're absolutely positive that you know who this is.

"Sergeant?"

Cho Hyun-ju turns and gasps when she sees you, a smile lighting up her face. She quickly embraces you, you happily hugging her back. You were always her favorite soldier (she never admitted it, being the sergeant of the Brigade, but you both knew she liked you best). You were one of the only people who supported her when she came out. You tried to fight against her discharge but, as a low-ranking soldier, you had no say in the matter.

"I knew it had to be you!" you say, pulling back with a smile. "When I saw someone go back into the playing field to help a guy with only ten seconds left, I just knew it was my sergeant!"

"It's good to see you," she says. "Though, I wish it was under better circumstances."

You nod solemnly. You had just watched at least a hundred people die while screaming and begging for their lives. As a former soldier, it was hard that you couldn't do anything to help the civilians. All you could do was stand there and listen to the screams and gunshots, and then the silence.

"How are you here? Are you not part of the Brigade anymore?" Hyun-ju asks.

You shake your head. "No, I actually left not long after you were discharged. It wasn't the same without you, and I just couldn't be civil with the others after how they treated you."

She nods, understanding. "Well, if I'm going to be here with anyone, I'm glad it's you. I trust you with my life, soldier."

You smile. "And I you, Sergeant."

<>

You and Hyun-ju had made it through the next two games together, along with some allies you made along the way. Together with Young-mi, Yong-sik, and Geum-ja, you had been the first team to succeed in the six-legged pentathlon.

You had also made it though Mingle with some new allies, though not all of your old allies made it. Young-mi's death was hard on your whole group, but Hyun-ju had been taking it the worst. While you had grown closer with Yong-sik and Geum-ja, she had formed a special bond with the young girl and had to watch her die right in front of her.

While you would like to take the time to mourn Young-mi, a lot has happened in the few hours since the third game ended. The vote on whether to go home or stay ended in a 50-50 tie, meaning you're going to have to redo the vote tomorrow. Then, a huge fight apparently broke out in the men's bathroom, leaving five players dead.

Both sides group together to count their numbers, and you find that there's now one more X than O. While the players around you celebrate, a feeling of dread shoots through you.

"Attention please. Lights out in 30 minutes. All players, please return to your beds and prepare for bedtime."

Shit.

Player 047 stands in front of the group. "Listen, you cannot change your minds. We have to win the second vote and get out of here tomorrow, alright?"

As the other players around you nod and move to their beds, you stay sitting, watching the O players. They're already looking at your group. Watching. Waiting. You look at Gi-hun, the previous winner, and know that he's thinking the same thing you are.

<>

"Those bastards are acting suspicious," Dae-ho says, returning to the small circle you formed on the ground. "It looks like they're up to something."

Jung-bae breathes out a laugh. "Whatever those idiots do, once we win the vote tomorrow, it'll all be over."

"You think we'll be okay?" Dae-ho asks, concerned. "They say things were really crazy in the bathroom earlier."

"We need to be ready," you say from your place between Dae-ho and Gyeong-seok. "They've been watching us since the moment they found out the prize money goes up if we kill each other."

The group around you tenses before Gi-hun speaks up as well. "Once the lights go out, people on the other side will attack us."

"Really?" Yong-sik asks from beside his mother.

Gi-hun nods. "Because if they kill us, they'll be able to win the vote and increase the prize."

"So what do we do?" Yong-sik asks.

"Let's attack them first," Young-il suggests. "They're probably thinking we'll just wait for the second vote. We can use it to our advantage. We'll attack them first once the lights go out."

"That's right," Player 047 says. "It'd be better to attack them first. We have more women and elderly on our side. If we get attacked we'll be at a disadvantage." You send him a glare that makes him freeze for a moment before continuing. "Attacking them first would give us a better chance of winning."

"I agree," Player 145 adds.

"We can't do that," Gi-hun says.

"But we have to get out of here," Young-il argues. "You said it yourself. Staying calm won't get us anywhere now."

"That doesn't mean we should kill each other," Gi-hun says. "That's exactly what they want us to do."

Jung-bae leans forward. "'They'?"

Gi-hun looks at him. "The ones who created this game." He turns to face the rest of the circle. "The ones who watch us play. If we're going to fight someone, it should be them."

It's silent before Dae-ho speaks up. "Where are they?"

Gi-hun looks to the ceiling. "Up there."

You all follow his gaze before looking around at each other.

"On the upper levels," Gi-hun says, "are the rooms they control the games from. The man in the black mask is their leader. Once we capture him, we'll be able to win."

"How are you going to fight them?" Young-il asks. "They have guns."

"We'll fight them with guns, too," Gi-hun says.

"But we don't have any," Jung-bae says.

Gi-hun turns to him. "We'll take their guns."

You and Hyun-ju look at each other. This is what you were trained for.

"From those masked men?" Gyeong-seok asks nervously.

Gi-hun nods.

"That's too dangerous," Young-il says. "Even if we manage to take a few guns, we'll still be outnumbered."

"What then?" Gi-hun argues. "Are you going to kill each other all night and hope you survive? Is that what you want, Young-il?"

Hyun-ju breaks the silence. "Do we... stand a chance?"

"We do if we catch them off guard," Gi-hun says. "Out of everyone, they're the ones who would least expect us to attack first. This is our last chance to end these games once and for all."

"How are you going to take their guns?" Young-il asks.

"Once the fight begins tonight, we'll have our chance."

<>

"Lights out in ten seconds."

"Ten,

nine,

eight,

seven,

six,

five,

four,

three,

two,

one."

The lights dim, then turn off completely, leaving only the red and blue lights from the floor.

You roll out of bed, getting under the frame. You feel someone else trying to get under your bed, and you move a bit to make room for Dae-ho. Just as you get in position, you see bodies creeping towards your side of the room, illuminated by the bright blue O on the floor.

There's a scream, and all hell breaks loose.

The lights strobe as you hear the sounds of screaming and bottles being smashed coming from all around you. Somewhere to your right, a bunk is toppled over, sending someone to the ground. Another player runs up to them, stabbing their fork into their neck.

You feel the ex-Marine next to you tense up and put a hand over his, trying to bring him some comfort, or at the very least trying to keep him from blowing your cover.

You hear the buzzer of the door and the lights come on. One of the soldiers fires into the air to stop the fighting as about twenty masked guards come into the room, all armed.

You quickly army crawl out from under the bed, Dae-ho following you as you lay down on the ground.

You hear footsteps getting closer to you, and your ear is moved as a device scans behind it.

You open your eyes, grabbing the soldier so they can't move. "Dae-ho! Now!"

The ex-Marine smashes a bottle over the head of the guard, knocking him unconscious. You take the opportunity to grab the submachine gun off of the soldier, shooting another soldier coming toward you and Dae-ho. You're so focused on the fight that you fail to notice the quivering boy holding his hands over his ears against the bunks.

Grabbing another gun, you quickly scale one of the bunks to get a better vantage of the fight.

"Sergeant!" You yell, gaining the attention of Hyun-ju. She looks to you and you toss the SMG to her. She drops her pistol and catches the weapon, turning just in time to shoot one of the pink guards coming for her.

You use your position to fire at the guards hiding behind bunks. You pull the trigger until you hear a click, cursing as the mag runs empty. You jump down from the bunk, using the butt of the gun to knock a guard out cold. You quickly take his ammo and reload your own gun, firing at a guard trying to shoot Gi-hun.

"Retreat. Retreat."

The voice over the intercom announces and the pink soldiers make their way towards the door. You're able to shoot two more, but most of the soldiers who are still alive are able to make it out of the room. The main guard with the square on his mask is too busy firing back to realize that the door has closed behind him, sealing him in the room with you just as he runs out of ammo.

"Stop! Hold fire!" Gi-hun yells.

Jung-bae and another player run over to the square guard, making sure he won't fight.

"You goddamn bastards!" you hear someone yell on the other side of the room and turn to see Player 047 aiming his gun at a bunch of O players.

"No!" Gi-hun yells, stopping the man before he can shoot. "This is not what we took these guns for. If we do this, we'll be no different from those masked men."

Player 047 lowers his gun, hanging his head and he softly cries.

Gi-hun steps to the center of the room. "Everyone! Don't be scared. Gather round, please! We're not trying to hurt you!"

You walk to stand by Hyun-ju and Gyeong-seok.

"Get the guns and ammo from the dead," she tells the both of you.

You nod, doing as your sergeant says while she takes out the cameras in the room.

<>

Placing one of the last guns on the mattress in the center of the room, you move to stand in line between Jung-bae and Dae-ho, handing the extra SMG in your hand to Dae-ho.

Gi-hun steps forward. "Everyone. We will now head up to the masked men's headquarters. We'll capture the ones who captured us, put an end to this game, and make them pay. Anyone who knows how to use a gun and wishes to join us, please step forward."

You look at the crowd in front of you, but everyone stays where they are.

"Hey," you hear a voice next to you say and turn your head to see Jung-bae stepping forward. "I know you're scared. I'm scared too. But this may be our last chance to make it out of this place alive. Fight with us so we can go home together. All together."

One of the players in the back of the crowd steps forward. "I'll fight with you."

Gi-hun waves at him to come and take a gun. Two other players come forward as well.

You watch as Yong-sik makes a move to step forward, but he catches your gaze as you shake your head at him. It's very brave of him to think about volunteering, but he hasn't even served his mandatory military service yet, and it would kill his mother if he didn't come back. You breathe a sigh of relief when Yong-sik stays where he is.

When it's clear that no one else is stepping forward, Gi-hun turns to you all. "Please check your guns and ammo."

"Let's take one radio each," Jung-bae says. "We'll use channel 7, the lucky number."

You put the strap of your gun around you, checking the mag and putting it back in place when you're satisfied with the amount of ammo that is left. You look to your right to see Dae-ho fiddling with his own gun. Just as you're about to help him, Hyun-ju steps forward.

"Attention," she says, holding up her gun. "This is the MP5, a submachine gun." She continues on the demonstrate how to load the weapon and set it to the mode you should be using. When she's done, she looks at you all. "Are we clear?"

"Yes," you answer, falling right back into the rhythm with your sergeant.

Hyun-ju nods to you, silently telling you to stay by her when you get out there.

"How do you two know each other?" Dae-ho questions, his voice a bit shaky.

You smirk, cocking the MP5. "I was in the 13th Special Missions Brigade. Hyun-ju was my sergeant."

Dae-ho stares at you, completely stunned. "You were in the Decapitation Unit?!"

You chuckle at his disbelief, nodding.

The man can't believe it. He's been bragging about being an ex-Marine while there's been two ex-Special Forces soldiers right next to him the whole time.

Gi-hun points a pistol at the square-masked guard. "Take it off."

The guard slowly removes his mask, revealing a boy no older than 25.

"Good God," Jung-bae says. "Do your parents know what you're doing here?"

The guard just stares at him.

Gi-hun cocks the pistol. "Take us to your captain."

<>

"All players, it is bedtime now. Please return to your quarters immediately. Otherwise, you will be eliminated from the game. Let me repeat..."

Gi-hun fires at the speaker, effectively shutting up the voice. Three guards are stood over you. "Get down!"

You duck behind the wall of the stairs. Feeling a hand on your shoulder, you turn to look at Hyun-ju behind you.

"Cover me!"

You nod, shooting at the guards while she sprints to the top of the stairs. From her new vantage point, she is able to take out one of the guards, causing their body to fall over the ledge and down to the floor.

When you duck down to reload, you see Dae-ho next to you. The ex-Marine is sitting in a ball, covering his ears and flinching every time a shot rings out. You look at him with concern, but your attention is stolen by Gi-hun telling everyone to hold their fire. Dae-ho gets a grip on his weapon and you all move, following Gi-hun and the un-masked guard.

As you move down an alleyway, Gi-hun stops the guard. "How much farther? Is this the right way?"

The boy points toward the end of the hall. "The entrance to the management area is around that corner. The control room is right above it."

Gi-hun pushes him. "Move it, then!"

"Wait," the guard says, reaching toward his pocket.

"What are you doing?" Gi-hun stops him.

"I need my mask to pass security," the guard explains. Gi-hun nods and the guard takes the mask out. He looks up, but before he can say anything else, a bullet goes right through his head.

You all take cover as more shots are fired at you. Something slashes onto your face, and you turn to see Player 072's lifeless body falling to the ground.

You drop the floor and crawl over to Hyun-ju, both of you taking positions in a green square area of the stairs. You nod to each other and duck out of cover, firing at the guards. You can hear the men speaking to each other at the other end of the line, but you focus on taking out as many guards as possible.

You and Hyun-ju alternate firing and taking cover, both of you shooting with deadly precision, doing your best to not waste any of the already low supply of ammo you have.

A player next to you screams and is shot. You turn, shooting at the guard approaching from your rear, taking out a few that are behind that one as well.

"Everyone! Check your magazines!" Hyun-ju calls out.

You take the mag out of the gun, seeing that you have about half of a clip left. Everyone announces that they're around the same.

"Young-il, Dae-ho, can you hear me?" The voice of Jung-bae erupts from your radio.

"Go ahead!" Young-il says.

"I think we're right below the control room." Shots can be heard in the background. "But we need backup and more ammo."

"We're running out of ammo, too!"

"There should be spare magazines in the soldiers' pockets in our quarters. Go get them!" Gi-hun yells through the radio.

"Did you hear that?" Young-il turns to the group. "They need backup! Three of us will go, and the rest will stay! Join us once you get the magazines! Who wants to go with me?"

Players 047 and ... volunteer and they run off towards the end of the hall.

"I'll go get the magazines!" Hyun-ju yells. "I'll come back as soon as I can, so just hold on until then!"

"Hyun-ju!" A voice yells. You turn to see Dae-ho raising his hand. "I'll go!" He hurries over to where you and Hyun-ju are taking cover. "I- I'm out of ammo."

"Do you know the way?" Gyeong-seok asks. Dae-ho nods.

"We destroyed the cameras on the way, follow them," Hyun-ju says.

"I'll go with him," you say. "I still have some ammo, so I'll cover him."

Hyun-ju nods. "I'll cover you. Go!"

You and Dae-ho take off down the stairs. He stops a few times, but you pull him along, keeping your eyes up to watch for the broken cameras. As you're running down the stairs, Dae-ho stops, and you turn to see him staring at a dead guard hanging over the ledge of a window.

"Dae-ho!" Jung-bae yells. "Can you hear me? Where are those magazines?"

You lift your own radio to your mouth. "We're getting them now."

"Alright! We're counting on you!"

You put your radio back in your pocket, grabbing Dae-ho's hand and pulling him along behind you.

You burst into the quarters, letting go of Dae-ho's hand as you sprint to a guard, taking the spare mags out of their pockets. You hear someone say your name and look up to see Yong-sik.

"What happened? Why are you back by yourselves?"

"We're low on ammo," you say, not looking up from the guard you're looting. "We need to get the magazines from their pockets. Help us!"

You look up to the boy to see him nod and run over to a nearby guard. Geum-ja and Jun-hee come over to the help, as well.

Once you've looted all the ammo from the guards, you place them into a jacket you found on one of the dead players. You tie it up and give it to Dae-ho, thanking the others as you lead him out of the room.

Gunshots can be heard as soon as you step outside. You keep moving but when you check behind you, you see that Dae-ho has stopped where he is.

"Dae-ho, we need to go," you urge.

He looks at you silently, but the fear in his eyes sends the message. You've seen soldiers like this before you joined the Special Forces.

Dae-ho stands in his spot, paralyzed other than the shake of his body in fear.

You hear your name and Dae-ho's through the radio. "Where are you? Can you hear me?"

You watch as Dae-ho lifts his radio, staring at it as Hyun-ju's voice comes through.

"Did you find the magazines? Are you on your way?"

Dae-ho looks at you. "I'm sorry," he whispers, dropping the radio on the ground and running back into the quarters with the magazines.

"Shit," you say under your breath. You follow Dae-ho into the room, looking around to find where he went. Yong-sik points toward a bunk and you find Dae-ho curled up there, rocking back and forth. Running over to him, you take the jacket with the mags, ready to run out of there. You take a look at Dae-ho, the pure fear coursing through him as he whispers apologies over and over.

You sigh, remembering one of the lessons Hyun-ju taught you as your sergeant.

Never leave a man behind.

Taking out your radio, you bring it to your lips and press the button. "Charlie Foxtrot."

You put your radio down, knowing that Hyun-ju will know what to do. You had picked up the phrase from your U.S. counterparts, saying it to each other when something goes wrong.

Moving to sit on the bed, you take Dae-ho's hands into yours. "Dae-ho, I need you to breathe with me, alright."

He slowly looks at your face before launching himself into your arms, sobbing into your shoulder. You rub his back comfortingly, knowing you can't leave him alone like this.

After a few minutes, Hyun-ju runs into the room shouting you and Dae-ho's names. She comes running over to you, stopping when she sees Dae-ho in your arms.

"What happened?"

Dae-ho jumps a bit at the new voice, burying his face farther into your jacket.

You look up a Hyun-ju, shaking your head at her. She nods, understanding. You point at the magazines and she scoops them into her arms, ready to take them to the others when the buzzer for the door goes off and more pink guards enter the room, firing in the air and making everyone scream.

Hyun-ju reloads her SMG, ready to take on the entire group on guards by herself. You watch as Geum-ja puts a hand on her shoulder, stopping her.

"You can't die like this."

You sigh in relief as Hyun-ju puts the gun down. From your hidden area, you try to get the guns and mags away from you, making it seem as though the three of you have been here the whole time.

As the guards come further into the room, you use your body to shield Dae-ho from them as he whimpers. You make eye contact with Hyun-ju. Whatever happens next, you'll face it as a team.

~

Dae-ho tags: @whatthefuckeryfuckityfuck @ally1uvsu @thebiggestigurosimp @come-as-you-are-111 @hiphip-horray @k1michii @tpwkcaryslizb @louissst28 @sshwaa @jennwonwoo @sunnysurvives @lalalaa2210 @tayshs @sunshinethatlooksalive @plntmxrss @lxnnrobin @mariaxman @alexx-iia @batty-barty-crouchjr @kxsm3t @takuma-talkz @peacemakersbeloved @skywalker0809 @soobinbunnie5

[mysticlael]

God, y'all like these <_< >_>

Dick: *Kicks the door open, looking panicked* Bruce: What did you do? Jason: NOBODY DIED! Bruce: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

Tim: Dear Diary, my teen angst bullshit has a body count.

Bruce: I hate to say ‘I told you so’— Jason: No, you don’t. You would marry 'I told you so’ and have a baby with it and buy adjoining burial plots.

Damian: I hate you with every inch of my body! Jason, looking down: That’s not a lot of inches.

Steph: My bad, It’s a knee jerk response. Dick, holding Tim's unconscious body: WHOSE KNEE JERK RESPONSE IS TO START THROWING BRICKS AT SOMEONE???

Robin!Tim: He called me the B-word. Jason: Motherfucker doesn’t start with ‘b’!

*after the Squad's plan goes horribly wrong* Bruce: Now it seems we're back at square one-- finding Jason. Tim: For the record, I already found him. Dick: And you let him get away before we could have a meaningful conversation! I'm telling you, just let me try- Tim: He stabbed me! Damian: I'm surprised he waited this long, Drake. We've all had the urge.

Pre-adoption Jason: I am very small and I have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that I'm under.

Roy: I'm so happy, I could kiss you! Jason: Um...Neat. *later* Jason, lying face down on his bed: I said "Neat," Dick. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm fucking stupid. Dick, upside down on the bed: Don't beat yourself up too much, Little Wing. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when Wally confessed his love for me? Jason: ...Didn't you thank them? Dick: *swings up* I fucking thanked him.

Steph: Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest, that just sounds nice and cozy. But if I invite you to my cabin in the woods you’re going to die. Tim: My favorite is explaining the difference between a butt dial and a booty call. Bruce: It’s called connotations. Jason: Try this one on for size, “Forgive me, Father, I have sinned” vs “Sorry, Daddy, I’ve been naughty." Dick: Great news! Language is now banned!

Dick: What does “baka” mean? Tim: Moron. Steph: Idiot. Duke: Stupid. Dick: The fuck did I do?!

Bruce: In the past year you have managed to piss off the LAPD, ATF, CIA, FBI- Jason: NBA. Bruce: …? Jason: Snuck into a Cliffords game.

Tim: Oh god, he texted you ‘hi.’’ punctuation only means one thing, Dick... He's mad at you. Dick: No, it's Jay. He's just being grammatically correct! *meanwhile* Jason: And then I used a period so they'd know that I'm mad at him. Roy: A period doesn't say 'I'm mad', it says 'you're dead to me'. Jason: I stand by my choice.

[evilminji]

You know all those Cults in Gotham?

Bet at least ONE of them could spring for both a Legit Magic User and a Cloning pod.

Because The Wayne's? Hearts of Gold. Long standing pains in the asses. Probably the only thing standing between this gods forsaken wasteland of a city and Their Dark Lord. For GENERATIONS no less!

It's sooooo obnoxious!

So they want to Curse Um dead. Just a good ol fashioned bloodline curse. Destroy um from within, etc. BUT! To do THAT? You kinda need a blood relative to sacrifice!

And Bruce is... well... rather infamously An Orphan With No Biological Kids (at that point).

So? What do you do? Make one, obviously. You send in some of your own on a Holy Mission. Honeypot that playboy! Get us a kid to sacrifice! Our God will reward you etc! But... FFS! What? Are brunettes not your TYPE or something?! Pretty lady! Throwing herself at you!!

TAKE THE BAIT!

But he DOESN'T. Because he's both really used to that behavior, as The Wayne Heir and a False Playboy, AND because? He's fuckin Batman. He can see through your schemes.

Okay.

Okay!

Plan B!

Get us some DNA. We'll CLONE the sucker. That should be doable, right?

........OH COME ON! How?!

Batman: [REDACTED] / Cultists: 0

Fuck it! This is impossible! How are we supposed too... *eyes drift over to the Wayne Family Private Graveyard* .......Idea? Ideeeeaaaa~! Someone get us a shovel!

So they, cultist bastards that they are? Fuckin rob a grave for some DNA.

OBVIOUSLY though, it can't be one of the more RECENT graves! He probably VISITS those! Watches them! No we gotta be SNEAKY! Get one a bit further back! Mwahahahaha! We're so brilliant! Our God is gonna give us SUCH a Good Grade in follower!

A thing that is both REAL and possible to achieve!

So, while a Weirdly FURIOUS Batman? Is just... VIOLENTLY breaking ALL of their bones? Cultist 17 is furiously digging like his life depends on it. Either somebody snitched or Batman was hunting them down! Either way?

Gotta! Get! That! DNA!!! *digs faster*

Ah HA! Got it!

Fucking SCATTER! Run you fools, RUN!!! *everyone bolts*

And AT LAST! They have it! Wayne DNA! Now? Pop that sucker into the machine and make us a baby! Too sacrifice! *relieved noises* Man, that was hard work you guys. But we DID it!

Except??

Theoretical Babies? And "Real, slowly forming in front of me and becoming a human child" type babies? VERY DIFFERENT psychologically. It's ONE thing to sacrifice a HYPOTHETICAL baby... but when you're the guy running and monitoring the Cloning machine? Watching it slowly form and come together into... into a CHILD?

You start asking questions of yourself. Of God.

Of what, EXACTLY, you are willing to do.

What lines you find yourself unwilling to cross.

And yeah, your life was SHIT before the cult. Yeah, you were alone. Adrift. Without purpose. Angry at the world for all of its ugliness and failings. But... sitting, alone, in a dark room? Nothing but the steady hum of machines and the cool light of that pod? You are left with nothing but time... and your thoughts.

And the baby.

The one... the one YOU made.

Almost... he's almost like a son, in a way. Your son. Floating there, innocent and unknowing. Destined to be born, only to die painfully, for a cause he could not even begin to understand. Because he's too young. Too small. Just... just a baby.

The baby YOU made.

Doubt seeps in like mist. Creeping into the cracks forming in your faith. Surely there's another way, right? Why not save up for a better magician? Or... or hire a hitman? Why involve a child? Surely... surely your God would not WANT this, right? Or if He did! Surely, he would want the boy to be able to CHOOSE, right? A noble sacrifice, for the cause?

The pressure builds. Batman is tearing the city APART looking for your fellow Believers. Leadership is pressuring you to get "It" ready all ready.

He's not an "it".

They are dismissing your questions. Threatening and posturing, as you grapple with your faith. Where? Where is the COMMUNITY that you joined? The camaraderie? Every day, Believers are being torn down. The faith has lost so many!

How can this be WORTH it?

Your faith is slowly, cruelly, strangled in your chest. A death, by ten thousand silences, and ten thousand more cruelties.

Your son is ready.

You do not tell them.

The Clone of Bruce Wayne's great-grandfather is small, but healthy, in your arms. A tiny warm body, with a strong beating little heart. You call the police. Leave your phone, call running, on the desk. No one thinks to stop you, as you calmly walk out the back door.

Why would they doubt?

You are Faithful.

You drive. Pray to a God you have lost faith in, beg forgiveness for what you do now. Your beat up old junker of a car makes decent time, as you leave Gotham. Your son, asleep in a carefully made nest of blankets, on the seat next to you. You drive. You keep driving.

Past towns.

Past cities.

Out of the state.

Stopping only to feed your son and fuel your car. You... you can not bring yourself to care about what will happen to you now. You know they will find you. Know this is the end. But something ancient burns in your chest. A caring you never thought was REAL.

You are afraid.

But you will not let them harm your son.

Finally, a town. Far from Gotham. Quite and cheerful. It calls to you.

Here. It... it has to be here.

You find the hospital. Tears choking you. There is a place to drop of children. You've seen them before. How strange, that now you stand before it and HURT. Your arms not listening to your command. You... you have to do this. You HAVE too.

He is just a baby.

He is your son.

You have to keep him safe. And... and that can not be with you.

You gently put your baby boy into the drop off. Press the buzzer. And then? You make yourself walk away.

Get back in your car, and drive. The gun in your glove box will insure they can never pry from you, what you have done. Where he is. He is safe now. He has to be. You... you did your job. As his father. You made sure he was safe.

You can barely see the road, through your tears.

You take your secrets to the grave.

And Danny? He grows up. Is adopted young and never knows different. Both a Fenton and a Wayne. Knowing only one of these, to be his. But... that Wayne? Was a damn fine man. A pillar of his community and a champion of the people.

Got tossed more then a few blessings, in his life.

They weren't the STRONGEST. But they added up. And more importantly? Were hardly the refined magics of the more powerful. They were cast onto "Him". By blood and bone, more often then not. Which was all well and good!

When there was only ONE of "Him".

Cloning technology did not exsist. So why would you word carefully against it? Danny becomes a VERY lucky boy. Survives many things he should not. In fact, the kindness and hard work of his original? Gifted back in magically powered well wishes? By this, he survives something NO ONE could possibly expect him too.

It saves his life.

His template would be quite pleased, knowing that. That his life of good deeds, saved the life of the child he never got a chance to meet. That it protected his children, from even beyond death.

And in Gotham? At long, long last. The program Bruce made in his helplessness and despair, to search EVERY child until the child made of his bloodline was found? Spits out a match.

A Watchtower engineer.

Daniel J. Fenton.

@hdgnj @hypewinter @lolottes @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @mutable-manifestation

[imsojules]

Imagine surviving a zombie apocalypse with JJ

Hey y’all! So I had a dream a few weeks ago after binging The Walking Dead and The Last of Us, and it inspired me to get back to writing after a long time! While I’m working on the actual fic (I would like to make it into a series), I’d like to share with you some headcanon teaser-imagine-type thing. 1.2k

Any feedback is really appreciated!! ♥

TW for typical zombie apocalypse violence, established relationship, mentioned extreme violence/death, hurt/comfort, Pogue fem!reader, English is not my first language!

masterlist

• The day they announced it as a pandemic, JJ rushed home and waited for his dad to come home; he never did.

• When everything went to hell, JJ was already running on instinct. He heard the news, saw the panic, and didn’t even stop to think. He found you in your driveway, confused and holding your phone like it still mattered. He didn’t even say hello, just grabbed your wrist and said, “We need to go. Now.”

• His voice was shaking. JJ Maybank does not scare easy — so when he looked at you like the world was ending, you believed him.

• John B hotwired a truck. Pope showed up with a first aid kit and four cans of soup. Kie had a machete and murder in her eyes. Sarah was already screaming at rich people to get off their yachts. And just like that, the Pogues became your apocalypse family.

• You’ve all got roles. Pope’s the tactician. John B’s the scout. Kiara’s the fixer. Sarah’s the backup. JJ’s the shield. You? You’re the glue. You’re the reason they haven’t splintered. You remind them there’s still something worth fighting for. Even if it’s just each other.

• JJ's survival strategy? Vibes and violence. He’s got no long-term plan, no route on the map, just a baseball bat, a stolen switchblade, and the promise he made to you: “I’m not leaving without you.”

• You’re in charge of rations, because JJ is not to be trusted around the food, and he’s not too proud to admit it.

• He deadass wants to go live in the mountains until all this has passed, and you’re like ?? “I’m not starving to death, Jay, forget it.”

• You constantly have to remind him he’s not Bear Grylls.

• He names his weapons. It’s dumb, but you let him have it. The bat is "Lucille 2," and the knife is “Karma.” You once caught him talking to them like they were teammates. “Nice work today, Karma. You really showed that corpse who’s boss.”

• You once found an abandoned community center with an old projector. Pope rigged it to work off a car battery. You all watched The Goonies while eating expired popcorn. It was the first time you saw JJ cry. He blamed it on “zombie dust.” No one called him out.

• Every new safehouse, he carves a tiny mark into the wall. A tally of the days survived. He never talks about it. You only saw it once—his name, yours, and a little plus sign between them.

• He taught you how to throw knives using an old road sign as a target. You beat him once. JJ claimed the wind was emotionally targeting him. “That was sabotage. Atmospheric betrayal.”

• Kiara taught you how to use a crossbow. JJ said it was hot. John B agreed. Sarah threatened to throw both of them into a walker pit if they kept being annoying. They shut up. (But JJ kept sneaking glances.)

• You kept a Polaroid JJ found—two strangers, smiling in some sunny-before-time. You call them "the ghosts." It’s silly, but sometimes you imagine they made it somewhere safe. That you will too.

• If there’s a tree in your path, you bet JJ’s going to fucking climb it. Passing an abandoned playground? Before you can blink, he’s on the jungle gym like “Look at me!!”

• He will insist he’s “scouting.”

• And it’s the little things that keep you sane.

• You both use humor to cope with the world.

• He can joke about the end of the world all day, but when you’re laughing, you’re reminding him that there’s still some piece of it left.

• You joked once about who’d be the first to die in a horror movie. “Definitely me,” he said without hesitation. “I’d trip saving you and get eaten with zero regrets. Classic heroic dumbass move. Five stars.”

• You started calling yourselves Team Cockroach—because no matter what came at you, you were still standing. JJ said it made you sound invincible. “Sexy little apocalypse cockroach power couple.”

• He made up a game called “Guess That Gunfire!” where you both guess what kind of weapon is being fired in the distance. Winner gets a protein bar. Loser has to cuddle him during night watch. You always lose. Mysteriously.

• You keep a small, battered notebook filled with sketches of places you’ve passed and letters you’ll never send.

• When things are quiet, the Pogues talk about what they miss most. Kie misses her garden. Pope misses his dad’s pancakes. Sarah misses showers. John B misses his freedom. JJ says he misses peace. You know he means it. He means you’re the closest he’s come to finding it again.

• At night watch, JJ exercises to stay awake. Like, you wake up in the middle of the night because you think you heard a zombie groan, but it’s just JJ doing sit-ups next to you.

• He senses you stirring and starts muttering, “Hundred and six, hundred and seven, hundred and—” but let’s be real, he only did like twelve.

• And you’re like, “How? Why? You’ve only had a can of tuna to eat in two days, where do you even get the energy??”

• “Gotta stay in shape if I’m gonna keep saving your clumsy ass.”

• JJ is the king of petty, spite-fueled motivation. “I’m not dying before I get to punch Rafe one more time.” “I didn’t live through the end of the world to starve to death. Not happening.” “I got bit by a duck, babe. A duck. I’m surviving out of spite.”

• He is terrified of losing you. Every time you two are apart, JJ is borderline homicidal.

• “I need to know you’re breathing. That you’re right there.” If he loses sight of you for more than ten seconds, it’s search mode activated. No one’s allowed to joke about it.

• There’s a comfort in knowing he’ll always fight for you. When the others doubt, when they hesitate, JJ’s always the one who steps up first, his fists clenched in a promise he’ll do whatever it takes to keep both of you alive.

• When you get to shower for the first time in a while, you suggest you just shower together and make the best of what little water you have.

• Imagine cuddling for comfort and warmth.

• Or patching him up after another close call.

• You once told him he was your home. He didn’t say anything, just looked at you like it physically hurt to love someone that much. That night, he held you like the world was ending all over again.

• You forget what day it is. Once, after spotting wildflowers sprouting through asphalt, you decided it was your anniversary. You didn’t know the real date, but you both agreed it felt like love.

• You have to be the responsible one, the decisive one, but in return, JJ will be your rock, your protector, steadfast and strong. Not even the weight of the world ending can faze him when he has you to worry about.

• When he says “I got you,” it’s never just words. It’s a promise. It’s a prayer. It’s a desperate, messy vow he’s never going to break—even if it kills him.

• After almost losing you once, he confesses that without you, he doesn’t have a reason to keep going. He survives to protect you.

• Never whines that he’s hungry or tired because he knows you are too, so whenever you ask if he’s alright, the answer is always going to be that he’s “okay if you are.”

• You once asked him what he’s fighting so hard for. He didn’t even blink. “You.” Then added, with a grin, “…and, like, definitely revenge on the duck.”

[grayandthyme]

thinking about firefly!reader and joel miller ;

inspired by THIS post.

firefly!reader, stunned into silence when Marlene tells you the impossible: there’s a girl—immune. The word doesn’t even seem real. And you? It's a myth. You've heard it before.

You’re expected to help get her across the country. Not just you—but you. Personally. Because there has to be a firefly with her.

For protection. For assurance. For the cause.

firefly!reader; your heart dropping when you realize what that actually means. That the mission isn’t just a handoff. It’s your burden. One girl. One miracle.

firefly!reader who meets Joel. The introduction brittle. Brittle like the ice you’re forced to walk across together. Tess stands between you like a reluctant bridge, laying out terms neither of you like. You don't mind her. You knew he'd be difficult—hell, you'd heard stories. But you didn’t expect the weight of him. The silence. The grief in his bones. He looks at you like you’re a waste of space. You return the favor. He's an asshole, you think. That's it, end of story.

firefly!reader who greets Ellie with a smile anyway. A real one. Because someone has to. She’s a kid, and you're the only one who seems to remember what that even means. While Joel scowls and Tess counts bullets, you tell Ellie stories of Fireflies who did the impossible. Individuals who blew through enemy lines, stitched the world back together, piece by shining piece.

You don’t know if they’re true. But it doesn’t matter. Someone has to believe in something. Right? Right.

firefly!reader who watches Tess die. The bite deep within her skin, crawling and licking at your consciousness. This time it’s not just another name to add to the list—it’s a blow you feel. She wasn’t a Firefly. She wasn’t one of yours. She didn’t believe in the cause. But she was real. Human. Brave. And she died for your mission. Your cause. You think about the empty building, about the lie Marlene might’ve told. About whether any of this is still worth it.

firefly!reader who grows quieter. Dimmer. No more bedtime stories. Joking with Ellie. No more laughter echoing down ruined hallways. Just silence, and the crackle of campfires, and the hollow sound of your own breathing. You let Joel take first watch more often. Not because you trust him—but because you're too tired to keep pretending you don’t. Sometimes you switch with him, letting him take the much-needed rest. Not because you care about him. But, because it'll get you to the end faster.

firefly!reader who starts to notice the way Joel looks at you. Not kind, not soft, but different. Like he’s trying to solve you. Like he doesn’t hate you as much as he used to. Like maybe you’re the only other person still standing in this ash-covered world who knows what it means to have lost everything. You’re both bleeding hope. You both want to stop caring. But you don’t. Not yet. You’re too stubborn.

fuck the light. fuck.

but you still carry it. it's the only thing you have.

firefly!reader who’s learned to watch his hands. The way they twitch before danger. The way they clench when he talks about his past. You think, maybe, he's done terrible things. You think, maybe, so have I. But you don’t ask.

firefly!reader who patches up Joel’s minor cuts and scrapes without speaking. Hands practiced, efficient, but gentle in spite of yourself. You’re not sure when that change happened—when the anger faded into calm, silent understanding. Maybe it was when he let you take first watch for once. Maybe it was when he didn’t complain about the firefly emblem on your jacket anymore. Maybe it was just time.

firefly!reader who starts dreaming again, even if you hate yourself for it. Of what comes after. Of a world where the girl makes it to the hospital. Where you find a place to rest. Where people stop dying for a cause that’s already half-dead. You don’t share these thoughts aloud. But sometimes, you think Joel sees them in your eyes. You miss the light. You missed when it shone so brightly.

firefly!reader who wakes up with frost biting your fingertips in Colorado, the wind howling through broken windows. Teeth chattering so loud you feel as though they might shatter. You’re used to discomfort by now, but Joel drapes his coat over your shoulders before you can reach for your own. You say nothing. Just nod. He doesn’t meet your eyes. Though, you can't help but tense at the feeling in your stomach.

firefly!reader who learns Joel isn’t as heartless as he seemed. Not really. He suggests Ellie like she’s his own—except he doesn’t at the same time. Not directly. Not with words. But in the way he watches her. In the way he teaches her to shoot, to listen, to run. In the way he touches her shoulder when she’s scared. You see it all. And you never bring it up.

firefly!reader who gets grazed by a shot in the side outside Salt Lake City, and Joel panics. Really panics. Blood all over his hands, cursing under his breath, cradling you like you’re made of something fragile. You try to laugh through the pain, say something witty, but his voice breaks—"I ain't playin' around, stay still, damnit."

The concern in his eyes made your breath falter.

Like it meant something. Did you.. mean something?

firefly!reader who hears Joel yell before you see the fall. One second he’s pulling you up the stairs, the next—he’s gone. Crashing through glass, landing hard, the metal rod impaling him like the earth itself wants to take him. The sound that leaves your throat is something raw, something not human. You didn't know the light could vanish that easily. That the darkness would swallow you whole. Leaving a rotten, sickening taste in your mouth.

firefly!reader who scrambles down with trembling hands, blood slick on your palms as you press into his side, trying to stop the flood. “Stay with me, Joel. Stay with me.” His face is ghost-white, eyes slipping. “You’re gonna be fine, we’re gonna get out of this—Ellie needs you—fuck—fuck…"

"… I need you."

firefly!reader who has to help Ellie drag him through the snow, each step a prayer, each breath a promise. You sleep sitting up, holding his hand, whispering nonsense stories like you used to—about cities lit back up, about summer days, about stars no longer hidden by ash. You're not sure if he hears. But you need him to.

He'll wake up.

Yeah. He'll wake up soon.

firefly!reader who wakes one morning and finds Ellie gone. The tracks in the snow lead away from the cabin, and your heart sinks so fast it steals the air from your lungs. You nearly tear the door off its hinges, waking Joel. "Joel—She's gone, okay? You stay here—Please, just rest… I—"

firefly!reader who watches him stagger to his feet, nonetheless, still half-dead, fury in his eyes like fire set loose. You load your rifle. You don’t say a word. Because you know exactly what it means to love a child who didn’t come from you.

firefly!reader who finds the Silver Lake cabin with Joel, your breath coming in panicked gasps. The smell of corpse rot, of smoke. The gut-deep feeling that something is wrong. You search every building. Then you hear it—Ellie’s scream. And it shatters you. It's not a mission anymore. You know that for sure.

This is your girl. Your girl.

firefly!reader who kicks the door open seconds after Joel, and finds Ellie bloodied, clutching a knife, trembling. He runs to her, pulls her into his arms, saying, “It’s me, baby girl. It’s me.” You stand there, stunned. Watching the girl who’s fought everything now collapse like a child.

firefly!reader who sinks to your knees beside them, one arm around Ellie, the other on Joel’s back. Fingers grasping for any semblance you can. They're alive. You're alive. Fuck, that's all that mattered.

firefly!reader who sees Ellie cry for the first time when winter ends. You comfort her like a sibling, like a parent, like someone who remembers what it’s like to be a child forced to grow up at gunpoint. Joel watches, quiet. Afterward, he sits beside you and doesn’t say a word for hours. But his leg touches yours the whole time. Knees softly brushing against each other, but eyes toward the fire.

firefly!reader whose fingers softly graze against his as you sleep, only a few feet away from each other. The silence between you is no longer awkward but heavy with meaning. You don’t talk about what’s changing. But it’s there. In the way he lingers beside you when Ellie runs ahead. In the way he tells you to sleep first, that he’ll take both watches. In the way your names start to sound softer in each other’s mouths.

firefly!reader who kisses Joel first—under the highway overpass, after Ellie nearly drowned. Fingers threaded through his curls, it tasted of coffee from the morning previous. It's desperate. It's like clinging to life. He holds your face like he’s afraid it’ll vanish. Like you might vanish. You don't say it. Neither does he. But the kiss is the kind you only give once you're already in love.

You don't talk about the kiss after it happens.

You don't say anything to each other.

firefly!reader who wakes up in the back of a hospital truck, dazed, alone. The Fireflies found you. They sedated you. Took you away. You ask where Joel is. No one answers. You already know. Breath hitching as you look around the room. Begging, pleading to take you to him. Take you to Ellie—for something. They look at you like you're a threat. Their stares no longer filled with light, and hope—now tight, and knitbrow.

You're an outsider.

firefly!reader who hears what they plan to do to Ellie. That the cure will kill her. And the screaming in your chest doesn't stop. She's a child. She's a person. And when you try to stop them, they lock you in a room like you're the one who betrayed the cause. Thrashing against the wooden door, slamming your shoulder repeatedly. Throwing objects in the room against the small pane of glass in the door. It feels like a lost cause. You're caged. A caged fucking dog. Betrayed by the light.

firefly!reader who hears the gunfire echo through the halls, and knows it's him. Of course, it's him. The blood trail, the dead silence. Joel kicks open the door, panting, wild-eyed. "Come on," he says. He doesn't explain. You don't ask.

firefly!reader who drives away from the hospital in a haze, Ellie unconscious in the back seat, Joel's hands tight on the wheel. Your fingers brush his thigh. He doesn't move away. His jaw tightens. "They would've killed her," he mutters, "I couldn't let them."

You nod.

firefly!reader who sits beside Joel later that night, both of you watching Ellie sleep under a canopy of stars.

And finally, finally, you say it. "I would've done the same." Joel looks at you, eyes full of something too raw to name.

And he says, simply, "I know."

"Y'know.. they used to force it into our heads," You inhale deeply, "when you're lost in the darkness… look for the light." Eyes dazed against the stars, then back to Ellie, as if she might disappear if you look away too long.

Who were you if not a firefly? If not, someone who believed in a new hope?

A few long beats of silence pass before he finally speaks:

"Used to think that meant somethin’. Lookin’ for the light." He shakes his head, voice low, "But turns out, light can lie, too."

Then he looks at you. Long, thoughtful.

"You? You ain’t a lie. That counts for more."

reader who loves him.

Not in spite of the monster. Because of the man. Because of the things he still tries to protect, even when the world gives him no reason to do so. Because even when hope dies, he still chooses you.

[willowed-wisp]

NSFW ALPHABET [ johnny ‘soap’ mactavish]

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

THE AFTERCARE KING!

He was raised to treat his partner like a goddess and you took him so well for so long… he’s waiting on you hand and foot, whatever you need. Bath being drawn? Food? More sex? He’s more than willing.

Even after a quickie, he’s checking you’re alright. Praising you for being so perfect, and more often than not it will lead to more sex because those eyes draw you back in.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

ON HIMSELF: He knows how much you love his eyes, probably the reason you even gave him a chance. Also they’re the reason he can watch your curves and how your lips widen when he slips into you… his eyes have a lot to do with his job and his life.

ON YOU: Johnny CANNOT pin down what he loves about you more. Your thighs when they tighten around his hips? Your lips that give him a run for his money no matter what they’re being used for?

He just loves YOU in general, he’s more of a personality guy but it’s an added bonus that you’ve got so many benefits.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Breeding kink is written all over this man. Inside all day long, he knows you don’t like having to clean up the mess on your body and the image of you carrying a little one of him… it’s too tempting for him.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Still hasn’t told Ghost that he fucked you over the arm of his couch when you were staying over at his.

Simon definitely knows, he could smell the unmistakeable scent of fresh sex as he came through to the living room. And the scrape marks on the wooden boards- the sofa had moved a few inches to the right.

Not to mention the scratches up Johnny’s arms, and the abrasions along your collarbone.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Johnny was so dead set on going into the military that girls may not have had his full focus.

He’s definitely experienced, have you seen that face ✨irresistible✨ and he’s an impossible flirt. Not a manwhore by any means but DEFINITELY knows how to pleasure you.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

STANDING: He’s got muscles and what’s the point in having them not to use them on the person he cherishes most. He’s fucking into you while you’re suspended in the air- only thing stopping your descent to the ground; his arms hooked under your bent knees and hands clutching your ass.

DOGGYSTYLE: He can get so rough and bothered with you on all fours, watching your fingers clutch into the soft sheets of his bed. Your pretty voice filling the void between the flesh slapping and mattress creaking. Johnny doesn’t care if he doesn’t last as long as usual, he can’t help loving how your ass jiggles against his spread thighs.

IN HIS LAP: Sitting up with you in his lap wrapped so perfectly around him. Christ, he’d die a happy man if he got to see that every day. Your moans so loud like that, him buried so deep. Your body shivers and nails clutch deeper into his tattooed shoulder blade.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s gonna laugh if you guys fall off the bed. Doesn’t mean he’s gonna stop fucking you. It’s a unique image seeing this buff guy, covered in a range of scars and tattoos have such an angelic smile while defiling you. A weird dichotomy but you see it in your fucking dreams.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Johnny’s a clean shaven guy down there. The guy even styles his facial hair and even his mohawk. He’s definitely got a handle of the hair down there.

There’s still a dark brown shadow down there but no hair in sight.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s so intimate.

When he comes home from deployment, he enjoys being cuddled up to something soft and breathing instead of crawling around in the dirt.

He’s so lively with his hands, cannot keep them off you. That’s how you end up under his heat, or how you end up spread with your beau on his knees eating you like he’s been a starved man.

Takes you out on little dates, nothing too fancy- he’s a down-to-earth guy. Normally in his local pub, you don’t mind as long as you’re with your man.

He’s so protective, and anybody would be stupid to cross this stocky built man with an SAS emblem on his forearm.

Johnny doesn’t even look at other women, as far as he’s concerned you are the only woman on the planet.

J = Jack off (masturbation head-canon)

Before you definitely jacked off once a day maybe more but after meeting you, you became the main focus and after you were ready to go all the way, you two have sex everyday. He just has an unquenchable need to be inside of you and feel that buzz.

During deployment, he doesn’t have the time or the drive to keep that amount up. But when he finds the time, the memories of you are his only assistance.

He’s definitely glad to get back to you, his safe place. His home.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

BREEDING: You’re the only person he’s wanted to knock up. Before he didn’t even know if he COULD be a father… he’d be gone for too many days for him to bear the guilt. He didn’t want to be an absent dad but knowing you were there to take care of the kids… he melts at the thought of two boys and you pregnant with a girl.

The reason he makes sure to come out alive, a family waiting for him.

BONDAGE: He gets way too excited being at your completed mercy. Hands behind his back, tied with a pair of your tights, on a dining chair. His blue gaze entranced watching you work your magic all over his tensed body. Until he breaks out of his restraints… you have one hell of storm coming…

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Doesn’t really care where you have sex just as long as it’s comfortable. The bed is a classic place.

CAR: Not too keen on places that are too open. He drives either a Ford Ranger or a relatively modern BMW, hop in the front seat. Or if he’s feeling more handsy and in control- back seat, hands on ass type of doggy style. It’s like candy to him

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You. You’re just the whole motivation for this man. You’re the reason he HAS to come home.

Rubbing his hair is a kind of turn on for him, any type of sensual touch. Caressing his tattoos and running your finger along his scars. He’s like a puppy dog turned to a wolf.

Wearing his clothes. He can’t help it, he wants everyone to know your his- maybe he bought you a shirt that said ‘MacTavish’ on the back just to fuck you in. Got matching hoodies as well. Even if you’re not married, they say ‘Mr and Mrs MacTavish’. They don’t stay on for long, most likely stripped with his bare hands.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything that would harm you. You’re too precious and delicate taking him so good.

No degrading you- he will never call you a ‘whore’, ‘slut’ or anything of that sort. You’re his lady, he’ll treat you like a goddess till the day he dies.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Doesn’t really care about blowjobs, prefers you taking him in other ways.

As for oral, he could eat you up for days and you’d gladly let him. He’s great at running his mouth and eating you up.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Truly is your decision or how long he’s been away from you.

If you’re begging him with those pretty eyes for him to jackhammer you- he will and lose himself in it.

But when he’s gentle and deep, it’s almost as affective because eye contact is involved… losing yourself in their waves.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He loves a good quickie, for him it’s like a warmup to actually worshipping you. It helps get that darker side out of him, he’s almost animalistic during quickies so he can pay attention to your own needs.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Johnny is open to trying new things except the no nos. He loves learning new positions and strives to keep you satisfied when you’re just happy with him.

He definitely takes risks- gets his blood pumping and he’s not the shy type. If someone does catch you in the act- he’ll just carry on… they shouldn’t have walked in. While you’re there mortified.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He could last all night and day if you wanted him to. His stamina is diabolical, but he’ll take care of you after the ten rounds he’s capable of managing through a 24-hour-span.

That normally happens when he gets back on leave. The neighbours definitely know when that is.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He’s definitely open to try anything new. But he’ll always protest after it that you were louder with just him.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Have you met this man? He’s the poster-boy for teasing in whatever degree.

Will get so far with foreplay and get distracted… but fluttering your eyelashes has never worked so well. He always concedes.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Definitely is shouting praises at you under his breath. About how good it feels inside of you and how he could stay there forever.

He gets louder with each round, it’s raw and rugged hearing his accent really come through so you can barely understand it.

That doesn’t mean you’re any less riled up by them.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Would maybe play with the idea of a threesome with Ghost… it’s slipped across his mind more than he’d like to admit.

You and Simon seem to get on great, and as protective as Johnny may be, it turns him on thinking about you being fucked by himself while choking on LT.

He knows it would never happen but it’s a weird fantasy he contemplates. And it’s only an idea, jealousy runs writhe in his veins at the thought of another person touching you like or at all.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s confident for a reason- about 7 inches but very thick.

You’ve never been so split in half before.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Craves you every minute of every day. He’s a fiend for your body… even without the sex, your company is his own drug.

On a scale of 0-10, he’s an 11.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If he’s been going at it, he’ll wait to see if you needed anything before slipping into bed beside you and his chest being used as your personal pillow. He sleeps so soundly since he met you.

————

masterlist

[cosycafune]

— PUSSY’S CONFESSION!

you know that satoru gojo likes you, so you’re confused by why his stupid self avoids you. but after a while, you finally got the answer you’ve been looking for. the man’s smart, but he’s really an idiot in the face of love. maybe showing him other ways will make him confess?

synopsis of acts: unprotected sex, creampies, getting caught, angst, pinning, degradation, virginity losses, missionary, cumming, kissing, slight fluff & potential more. not proofread.

*#*<3

Pinned to the wall, you’re almost breathless — your eyes wide whilst an angered Satoru towered over you. He’s mean, his nimble fingers barely activating their flexibility — when it came to trapping your hands against the door.

It wasn’t your fault that you’re tightened against his bedroom door, your eyes watery as nothing more than his somnolent eyes met yours.

There’s not a hopeful spark. There are no colliding moons that boomed and formed fireworks with you there. To you, your heart pondered on the possibility of Satoru hating you — even after the two of you shared your first kiss.

“I-I know…that you hate me, Sato’,” Shortening Satoru’s name subconsciously, your eyes grow teary at his grasp tensing — your nickname ringing through his frazzled mind.

“Because you know that I’m not capable of loving you properly, without putting you in danger,” Anger adorns Satoru’s wavering tone, “I’m not the light that you’re looking for, even if we did share a kiss.” Your eyes collapse at his impactful let down.

“Am I so easy to give up on?” Mumbling innocently, you speak to him with longing. Longing that you had never experienced before him.

Satoru’s eyes are dead set on your own, even as you attempt to look away — saving your shredding dignity. Dignity whilst he has you at your most vulnerable, his lips inches away from your own as your friends’ laughter lingers against your warm ears.

“You’re going to die being with me,” Bottled, Satoru subconsciously tautened his hold — his eyes meeting your delicate curls of hair.

“Then, why do you have me pinned against the wall?” Sniffling, you avert your gaze to the photo of the two of you — on his brown desk.

“B-Because—”

“—N-No, you just wanted to have almost all of me until you made this stupidity known!” Shouting, writhing vigorously, you continue, “You didn’t have a problem when we were cuddling, talking everything out, comforting each other near death, so what’s changed?” Softening with detrimental hope, your lips contort with restricted freedom.

“Because we got close to having sex, and I couldn’t do that to you, knowing that I might leave you to save you!” Satoru’s bellowing causes you to wince, glancing at him with vast eyes — irreversible damage settled on you.

“You have me pinned to a wall! You haven’t tried, but have the audacity to assume that I’m weak!” Grumbling at Satoru not moving, your heart wavers at his knee settled innocently between your thighs.

“What are you going to do about that?” Satoru’s unfitting teasing leads you into gently grinding against his knee, your summer dress gifting access you’ve never dealt with before.

“I-I’ll grind until you tell me that you love me!” Lightly grinding against Satoru’s reciprocating knee cap, a light moan entwines with your bellowed statement.

“I know that we almost had sex before, but will losing our virginities now change anything?” Concerned, Satoru’s conflicted question sparks a flame within his pensive eyes.

“Only if you tell me that you love me, since you do everything but tell me that,” Halting, you attempt to speak to Satoru’s soul — unwilling to lose yourself if he held no love for you.

“I-I love,” Satoru grows nervous, stilling his confession, unable to fathom placing you in danger, “I don’t want to hurt you.” Satoru’s false anger envelops you, causing you to begin to weep — feeling unworthy.

“I-I’m not weak, and I can protect myself,” You admit, emotionally stuffy at Satoru’s patronisation.

“You’re weak, and you know that,” Heartbroken, you pathetically glance at a wordy Satoru, “But, I still love you, so get killed if you want to.” Muttering, Satoru glances around his dorm room — his lips drawing nearer to your pouty own.

“Don’t speak to me like that again—” Satoru presses his knee upon your clit, softly rubbing upon the area as you break into uncontrolled moans.

“Speak like what, Princess?” Scoffing, Satoru pushes himself into painfully toying with you, dropping a hand of his own to lift up your summer dress — observing your frilly underwear.

“Like I’m less equal than you are,” Standing up for yourself, your lips waver as Satoru uses his vacant hand to rub your clothed clit.

“You’re my equal, so let’s see if you can handle me, without alerting Suguru and Shoko,” Deviously smiling, Satoru cups your ample breast with a newfound intrigue — his fingers brushing over your taut nipple.

—

Dazed, stretched and completely pulverised by an inexperienced Satoru, your eyes are teary, your limbs engraved by Satoru’s ample cock. Satoru had grown greedy, speedily learning how to fuck you.

And, well now, he lingers moments away from making you cum for the first time. He remains towering over you, his girthy cock splitting open your pretty cunt with all of his might. A beautiful might that has you pathetically moaning, your cream upon his cock completely motivating him — leaving him into pushing you further into his bed sheets.

Even with all the bed creaking, Satoru didn’t care as the thought of departing from you like this doomed him. To confess, to him, was to reveal your fate of death. However, like this, a safeness emerged, even if it was through him fucking you gently — stealing away your hesitant breaths.

And there it was, an ethereal face you pose — unable to hold back your cum while he cums with you. It’s something so reckless, but Satoru’s heartbeat entwines with you own as he tenderly collapses upon you. Upon you while you glance up at him, attempting to process how the two of you had gotten away with raw dogging so loudly, your cunt squelching, writhing and taking him all in.

“Sato’, just a little bit more,” Satoru’s inspired by your pleading words, leading him to grow hard inside of you — beginning to thrust gently enough. Gently enough as you had mildly bled throughout, and he didn’t want to hurt you further.

As, seeing your face tighten at his girthy cock filling you out, shaky and close to tears, lead Satoru into almost stopping. But with you holding his ample hand, you encouraged him into pushing through your pain. Your shimmering, teary eyes paired with a jelly smile that crumbled with strain.

“Ah! Sato’! Yes!” Drooling, your eyes roll back with Satoru rearranging your moulding walls.

“S-Shit, never thought I’d learn this right now,” A blushing mess, Satoru’s eyes widen at the extremely lewd sight of you — never had he experienced or viewed you in this lighting.

“Y-You’re so beautiful,” Mustering nervously, Satoru’s eyes mature into a smitten state — finally appreciating you in all of your beauty.

“Ngh! Yes! I-I am!” Connecting your lazy lips with Satoru’s own, you moan into his mouth with each desperate, emotion-storing pounding.

Pounding you know Suguru and Shoko could hear, especially with the crazy amount of shaking that Satoru’s bed made. Satoru’s gentleness was also paired with this unfulfilled desperation, leaving him into basking in your unfamiliar cunt. Something he couldn’t long to let go, memorising the soppiness of your cunt, your ring of cum, your creampie that smears his cock, he just couldn’t let it go.

“Hm! Take it, Princess! Yes!” Satoru shamelessly shouts, pulling his thick cock out of you, all before shoving into back inside of a squeamish you so effortlessly.

“F-Feels…so good—”

“—S-Satoru! Y/n!” Shocked, panting heavily, you and Satoru glance at his dorm door in shock — grateful to have locked it.

“Only I’m here,” Serious, Satoru breathless spews his lies — covering your mouth before he lightly thrusts into a tingly you.

“I can hear Y/n moaning, but make sure to at least get plan B,” At Suguru’s proud voice, Satoru feels you wrap your legs around his waist — subconsciously mewling loudly at his deep spurts cum within your abdomen.

“I love you,” Satoru shyly mumbles, observing the shyness you exhibit — covering your features with heavy shame.

“S-Suguru…heard us,” Close to tears, your choppy breaths distort your panicked words.

“I don’t care, since you’re all that matters and I said I love you,” Whining, Satoru collapses against your plentiful breasts — annoyed at the mentioning of his best friend.

“You have to earn it, since you were rude earlier,” Smiling, Satoru kisses your cushiony lips — glancing into your eyes.

To you, his eyes spilled a confession of genuine love. Through the heavens and the earths, his love’s something life-altering.

do not copy, modify or repost my works on any platforms, claiming that they’re yours. all rights reserved: cosycafune. 2024.

[fear-is-truth]

Headcanons for the bowers gang helping reader babysit her three younger siblings (preferably two girls one boy) since that's what I have

❛ THE BOWERS GANG . . . HELPING YOU BABYSIT YOUR YOUNGER SIBLINGS ❜

꣑ৎ ‎ :‎ note. ꒱ this was so fun to write, hope u like it !

HENRY BOWERS

begrudgingly involved. he complains about helping the entire time, grumbling under his breath about “not being a fuckin’ daycare,”

complains loudly, swears even louder, and absolutely refuses to admit that he likes how your little brother starts copying him (oh no)

curses constantly. you remind henry again not to say “fuck” in front of the kids and he mutters “fucking fine” in response.

acts like he’s doing you a huge favour, but secretly enjoys being useful around you.

pick up your little brother by one ankle (cue the chris hemsworth meme)

────୨ৎ────

VICTOR CRISS

vic didn’t even wanna come. he only showed up because a.) you asked, and b.) the alternative is henry throwing a fit and patrick emotionally scarring them for life. (of course, vic trusts belch’s babysitting skills but he can’t trust those two idiots™ dealing with little kids.)

so now he’s parked on your couch, with his feet on the coffee table, assuming he can just coast through the next few hours in peace while the other guy wreak havoc in varying degrees of enthusiasm and psychosis.

gives really insightful advice like “careful there—don’t crack your head open.”

one of your sisters has a huge crush on him. (like in an innocent way—you know how little kids idolise this person they deem ‘cool’ and vic gives off this ‘bad boy vibe’)

disappears when one of the kids starts crying.

you find him leaning against the porch, smoking a cigarette and staring up at the sky like he’s watching god die behind the clouds.

────୨ৎ────

PATRICK HOCKSTETTER

should NOT be around children, but here he is.

he sits in the corner, watching the kids like they’re part of a nature documentary.

gives your brother an empty lighter and tells him it’s a spy gadget, then convinces him he’s a secret government agent.

casually says the most horrifying shit. “there’s a parasite that burrows into fish tongues and replaces it.”

will absolutely engage in sibling drama—takes sides during arguments just to stir the pot.

hands your little sister a dead lizard and tells her to ask henry if it’s poisonous.

────୨ৎ────

BELCH HUGGINS

belch is probably the only one of the group who genuinely knows what he’s doing.

absolute natural. grew up with a noisy house and knows how to keep kids entertained without losing his temper.

he’s patient. like, saint-level patient—and doesn’t get flustered when they start crying or fighting. just sits between them and tells them they all have to “take a chill pill,” which somehow works.

makes grilled cheese without being asked and cuts the crusts off.

lets all three of them climb on him like he’s a jungle gym. piggybacks, airplane rides, the whole works.

talks in funny voices, does impressions of cartoon characters, makes them laugh so hard they fall over.

he’s the only one you’d trust to babysit solo next time.

[me-and-my-3lovers]

First Time

Human!Sam x Alpha!Male!Reader

The world is split between ABO and normal humans. You are an alpha hunter with the Winchesters, and have been having a rough time with your ruts. This takes place around season 8, post bunker and pre trials.

MINORS DNI, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 2700

Warnings: Self loathing, slight Dub-con elements, Angst, A/B/O dynamics, foreplay, oral sex, male fingering, male-on-male sex, knotting, scenting, no proofread

Masterlist

--

You were warm and happy and wanted to stay in bed forever. Unfortunately, your alarm clock was screaming at you. It was only 9 AM, far too early to wake up, but, alas, you were awake. You rose from your nice and cozy bed and went to the kitchen. When you arrived, Dean was making coffee and Sam had his nose in a book. You greeted them as best you could before grabbing a bowl of cereal. The first bite was delicious, the cereal was still crunchy but not soggy, perfect.

"How does your rut work?" Dean asked while putting away the milk.

"Dean..." Sam warned from the bar stool.

You paused, a spoon of cereal halfway to your mouth, "You have the internet; look it up." You savored the taste of the cereal, eager for the conversation to end.

"But isn't that like expecting sex to be like a porno?" You stared at Dean, taken aback by his metaphor.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes, "Of course, you find a way to bring it back to porn, Dean."

You ignored Dean's question and took another bite of your cereal. Dean sat beside you, staring as you shoveled the rest of the cereal into your mouth. The silence was deafening. The three of you sat, ignoring each other before you decided to get up and put your bowl in the sink.

"Why do you even want to know about my rut?" You asked, breaking the silence.

"We've been hunting together for years, and now we're living in the bunker, and we walked in during it..." Dean started scratching the back of his head, trying to find the words to continue.

"Ok, and?" You prompted.

"We had to call Cas in to stop you from dying." Dean blurts out.

You tensed at Dean's words. It wasn't untrue that your rut almost killed you last time, but calling Cas was unnecessary. Sam stared between you and his brother, waiting for any sign of violence.

"That was unnecessary." You started to walk to your room, not wanting to be around Dean anymore.

"I didn't mean it like that," Dean grabbed your arm and spun you to face him. "I'm worried about you, we're worried about you."

You glanced between him and Sam for a few moments. "Then you'll let me handle my rut how I see fit." You resume the walk to the safety of your room.

"That doesn't explain why you had a fever of 107 and were coughing up blood." Dean follows after you. Sam stood up and followed close behind, not trusting the situation to die down.

"I mean, heats and ruts are a reproductive thing, alphas and omegas aren't meant to go through them alone." You stop at the door to your room and turn back toward Dean and Sam. "Listen, I've gone through every rut since I was seventeen by myself and survived. Now if you don't mind, leave."

Dean scoffed and rolled his eyes before stomping away.

Sam looked at you with those puppy dog eyes. "What if you weren’t alone?" Sam asked.

"No, I am not subjecting someone, anyone, to me on my rut." You turned around to open your room. "If you think Dean is insufferable about the Impala..." you whistle at the end of your sentence for emphasis. "Like I said," you jump on your bed and face Sam, your hands behind your head, "I've been doing this for twenty-one years, I'm good."

Sam sat at the foot of your bed, resting his hand on your ankle. "You were screaming in pain."

"Sam, drop it."

"No! We came home and found you half dead! I won't let you go through that again."

You sat up, staring Sam dead in the eyes. "You weren't supposed to see that..." You flopped back down onto your bed, staring at the ceiling.

"Well we did see it, and you have been suffering like that for twenty-one years?" Sam sighed and hung his head "I care about you, I- I've cared about you for a long time."

"This is more than caring, Sam. The only way you could help me through my rut is degrading."

"If you think two men having sex is degrading, then I have some harsh realities for you in the twenty-first century." Sam scoffed and rolled his eyes at your antics.

"It isn't just sex, it's..." You couldn't find the right word to describe it. "You can't describe the violence of being with an alpha during their rut, you'd be subjecting yourself to my worst parts. It's not-" Sam's lips met yours, silencing you. The kiss was fleeting, over before you could react. Sam rested his head against yours and brought your hand to his cheek.

"You don't have to be alone, I'm here for you, always." Sam kissed your palm.

"You don't get it, Sam," you whispered. "I can't let you help."

"Why not?" Sam brought his free hand to rest on your neck, "I want to do this, for you."

You leaned into Sam's touch, craving more. "You'll never be able to look at me the same way again, and I don't want to lose what we have."

"But if you don't let me help then I could lose you forever." Sam kissed you as hard as he could, "I don't want to lose you."

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath in. When you opened your eyes again Sam had the best puppy dog eyes he could muster plastered on his face.

"You're trying to lay it on thick aren't you," you chuckle, knowing you couldn't say no to Sam's puppy dog eyes.

"Is it working?"

"If, and that is a big if. If I let you help me, can I call you Sammy?"

--

You'd been shifting your room around for hours, trying to make the perfect nest. You took a lot of Sam's shirts and blankets to place around your mattress on the floor, but it still didn't feel right.

"Not comfy enough... what makes... comfy?" you knelt in the middle of the nest contemplating.

"PILLOWS!!" San came barging in with what seemed to be all the pillows in the bunker.

"Pillows..." You nodded your head before taking the pillows from Sam and arranging them.

"This looks like a proper nest." Sam came up behind you and kissed your cheek. "I love it."

"Are you sure you wanna do this Sammy?" You asked, "You don't have to."

"I want to, I want to help." Sam moved to face you and kissed you.

You pulled Sam against you and lowered him into the nest.

"Your eyes, they're gold!" Sam said, bringing his hand to caress your cheek. You leaned into his touch.

"It's my rut, my wolf... it's trying to take over. I can make it go away, give me a moment." You closed your eyes and tried to focus on locking your wolf away.

"Don't, I like it." Sam leaned up to kiss you again, breaking your concentration.

Sam started moving his giant spider legs to wrap around your waist. You could his semi-hard boner through his jeans, as his ground up into you. You broke the kiss to rid Sam of his shirt and jeans. Once you and Sam were down to your underwear, you went back to attacking Sam's mouth with your own.

You kissed down his jaw, stopping at his neck, savoring the smell of Books and firewood coming off of him. It was intoxicating. You started sucking and nipping at Sam's neck, leaving deep purple marks behind.

"Ow!" Sam slapped you away, hard. "A little aggressive with the love bites," Sam grumbled.

"Sorry," You lifted your head to look him in the eye, "I can't help myself. An omega's mating gland is around their neck, alphas tend to fixate on that area." You tried to leave gentler kisses on his neck, moving down his body.

You gave a light suck to each of Sam's nipples, causing him to moan. You moved further south, nipping and licking at his stomach, making sure there wasn't a patch of skin that went untouched, stopping at the waistband of Sam's underwear. Catching your breath, Sam took that time to rid himself of his underwear. He was rock hard and leaking. You wasted no time sucking him down until you gagged. He fisted his hands in your hair, pushing your head down further. You sucked harder, using your tongue to circle the head of his dick. Sam tried thrusting up into your throat, but you pulled off him.

Flipping him onto his stomach, you separated his ass cheeks and licked a stripe from his balls to his asshole, causing Sam to shiver.

"Are you sure about this Sammy?"

"Yes!"

You dove straight in, pushing your tongue past the tight ring of muscle. Sam's moan was downright animalistic. You moved your hands to Sam’s hips, holding him in place while your tongue explored him. You worked your tongue deeper into his hole, getting him relaxed and used to the feeling.

"I'm ready for you, come fuck me, baby."

You withdrew from Sam's ass and flipped him on his back again. You moved up His body, trailing kisses from his stomach to his titties, sucking each nipple. When you got back up to Sam's mouth, you maneuvered both of you so you were sitting up and Sam was straddling you.

"What will it feel like when you... you know..." Sam made crude hand gestures to explain what he didn't say.

"When I knot you?" Sam nodded his head. "I don't know."

"How do you not know?!" Sam whisper-shouted. "Haven't any of your other partners described what it's like?"

Your body flushed under Sam's expectant gaze. "...I've never..." You try to look anywhere but Sam's eyes.

"Are you a virgin?" Sam asked, a teasing smile forming on his stupidly perfect face.

"NO! I just... typically, people aren't interested in..." 'Me' you wanted to say, "I've never knotted anyone," You mumbled, hiding your face in the crook of his neck. That familiar pang of rejection started festering in your chest. "If you don't want to do this, we don't have to. You can go now." You pulled away from Sam and turned over.

"No, no, no, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Go. Now." You growled out.

Sam grabbed his clothes and left your room without another word, leaving you alone as the pain of your oncoming rut and rejection radiated through your body. You could feel hot tears streaming down your face as you start tearing down the nest you made. You threw pillows and shirts out of the room, a dull ache settling in your chest. As more and more of the nest got thrown out, the pain became more distinguished. It festered in your heart. It was only when the last of Sam's scent was flung out of the room that the agony started. A dull throbbing in your heart turned into stabbing pain. You screamed, unable to hold it in anymore.

--

White-hot, searing pain ran through you, starting at your heart and radiating to your limbs. You felt like screaming, but the most you could muster at this point was a pained whimper, your vocal cords raw from the first few hours of screaming and crying. It felt like your heart was ripping itself apart while your body was attempting spontaneous combustion. You tried to rut against something, in a pitiful attempt to relieve some of the pain. Your body retaliated by sending another wave of pain through you.

'You deserve this,' you heard in the back of your mind, 'No one wants to be with a freak like you, a freak of nature. A sideshow attraction.' You whimpered again, the words cutting deep into your heart. You looked around the room; the scattered remnants of your nest stared back at you. 'It was stupid to think he wanted you,' the voice said again, 'All it brought you was pain and misery.' The voice was right; the rejection only made your rut more painful. As another wave of searing pain washed over you, you shut your eyes, and your mind curled into itself. Conciseness and thought gave way to animal instinct. 'A feral monster!'

A low, somber howl left your lips, one last cry for help, for a nonexistent mate to relieve the pain in your heart—the howl of a dying alpha.

"Shh, I'm here." Sam came into your room and crawled into the nest, pulling you closer to him. He kissed your forehead, "You're gonna be ok." Sam's hand petted your hair while he kept whispering assurances to you.

You stopped Sam's movements to kiss him. The kiss became more passionate and hungry when Sam didn't pull away. When you both had to pull away for air, you stared into his eyes. A whimper escaped your lips.

Sam shifted himself so that he was straddling you, "I got you." Sam affirmed, bending down to take your lips with his, grabbing the sides of your face and pulling you closer.

You bucked your hips against Sam's, causing both of you to moan. Sam started stroking your dick while stripping off his shirt and underwear. Very gingerly, Sam lowered himself onto you, hissing at the stretch. You sat up to rest your head against Sam's shoulder, mouth gently kissing the hickeys on his neck. Once Sam was fully seated your hands moved to rub circles on his thighs.

Sam took a minute to adjust before moving. He moved your hands to rest on his hips. You squeezed his hips harder as he bounced faster and faster. In a sudden bout of strength, you grabbed Sam and held him at the end of your dick. You stared into Sam's eyes before pulling him down to the knot.

"That's it alpha, come on baby," Sam whispered in your ear. Spurred on by Sam's words, you started trusting to match his bounces. Sam grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers. Your knot began to swell and catch on his ass. "I feel it, so close." Sam tossed his head back in ecstasy as hot ropes of cum spattered on the both of you. While Sam got lost in his high, you slowed his bouncing until he was resting on your dick.

As Sam came down from his high, he looked at you, puzzled. "Why didn't you knot me?"

Your body started to hurt again when he asked that. You shook your head and whimpered.

"You need to knot me to feel better," Sam said, covering your hands on his hips.

You shook your head and whimpered again, trying to roll Sam over to lie down.

Sam held onto your shoulders and started bouncing again, trying to get you to knot him. "Come on baby, you need to knot me." You tried again to get Sam to lie down, but he was too strong. Once Sam had enough momentum he slammed himself down over your knot, causing you to cum. As your knot locked you in place you bit Sam at the junction of his neck and shoulder, trying to claim him.

Sam moved his hands to play with your hair as you lapped at the mark you made. "There you go, baby. You feel better now?"

You nodded and nuzzled into Sam's neck. Sam kissed your forehead and finally let you roll him over to lie down. "Goodnight my love."

--

You woke up surrounded by the scent of bacon and batter. You sat up; the heat from your body had subsided, and the searing pain had turned into a dull thud. Looking around, the room was cleaned up, and your nest was remade. You shifted in the nest, moving some things around when the door opened, Sam walked in carrying a tray of blueberry waffles, bacon, and orange juice. You stared silently as he walked closer, wondering why Sam was bringing you breakfast. He placed the tray in your lap and sat beside you, curling into your side.

"Dean made us some breakfast. He said it was a treat for 'being such a good boy last night' Can you believe him?" Sam scoffed.

You remained silent, staring down at the plate in front of you.

"The waffles are getting cold," Sam said after a minute, grabbing a waffle and eating it. You stared at him until he looked at you.

"What happened last night?"

"What do you mean 'what happened last night'?" Sam sat up and rubbed the crumbs from his fingers back onto the plate.

"I can't remember anything after you left."

[8ysharkstar]

[ Shadow Milk Cookie × reader ]

" won't you be my prom queen/King? " / “ Right now your mine “

> Fluff, yandere-ish?

TW; SPOILERS TO SOME PART OF THE LORE, EP 7 SPOILER, YANDEREISH SHADOW MILK.

RcmSong;

A. Prom Queen - Insane Clown Posse

B. Rule #34 - fish inside a bird cage

☆;

Oh he was more than in love with you, he was more of a delusional side. He just wants to hold you down to him, get you by his side by lying, spreading misinformation. Just for you to let go of pure vanillas hold of trust between both of you.

You were his joy, pride, prize, his own trophy.

; you were apart of the gingerbrave and friends gang, with pure vanilla on your side, nothing can go wrong when both of you guys went to the spire of shadows, which is shadow milks kingdom area. Everything seemed like Erie aura, seeing a rabbit with an axe was the first thing you saw in your life. Was it odd? Most likely, but this place is odd itself, even the inside of the castle.

Have you seen it yet? Something odd about this place. You guys were right, the place itself is weird, even the inside the castle.

Apple faerie cookie sounded different with that crumbled cookie. Was it really odd that her presence was different..?

…

You guys felt tired for exploring for a while, with the wolfperd, crumbled cookie, enemies being shaped like a jester.

You wanted to forget all of that and get to sleep to ease up for tomorrow.

Slumbering with your friends

it is difficult to sleep in this kind of environment. With the kind of tricks he can pull out, even one of your friends could secretly be one, but you don’t Believe in that.

“ Y/N cookie! Are you awake? “

Cheerful voice filled your ears, apple faerie cookie seemed very awake.

“ what seems to be the issue apple faerie? “

“ may I show you something that I found? It won’t take long, promise! “

…

You go on follow her ahead, behind her tracks, following her footsteps.

‘ never has I ever seen this part of this area, what has she found? ‘

“ right on this hallway! “

It was dark, long, eire hallway, Weird isn’t. Still can’t see it? Maybe if you look very closely, and you’ll find out eventually.

“ aww! My sweet y/n cookie, your finally here! Thanks to my sweet little companion, she was able to get her trickery to be lured here! “

“ Kya ha ha ha! Anything for you, Shadow Milk Cookie! “

Froze like the dead, couldn’t BELIVE you have trusted her. It’s always been there, but you just never look forward to it. Was it really the end?

“ now that I have you, may I please make you one of US? “

Option A; Refuse.

What’s the cause if you refuse to? Maybe putting inside a cage will be his first thought, watching you, as you have horrified eyes.

Your freedom is in my thread! Merely crumbling your insides APART.

Option B; Accept.

Your one of his personal ones, you are his precious, you work for him. You die for him. You kill for him. You’re now his little pet toy.

Took inspo from @brittle-doughie btw! :3

[ebenelephant]

look i've been partaking in fandom for a number of years now but nothing so far has affected me quite so much as ninejackrose, and doctorjackrose in general. i feel nauseous just thinking about them.

because you have the obvious angle; they seem so in love, then jack is abandoned and waits for the doctor for 150 years only to find that rose is gone and the doctor a) has a new face and b) has moved on. after they left him, after all that sincerity and affection, they just carry on as normal as though he'd never been there to begin with. but also, rose clearly doesn't know about jack's immortality, so we have to ask, what does she think happened to him? what did the doctor tell her? how do you even begin to untangle the fucked up ethics of that one?

rose made this man immortal because she couldn't bear to think of him as dead, and no one even told her he'd died in the first place. she was nineteen. the doctor was over nine hundred. jack was in his thirties. she made him into essentially a perfect companion; somebody who the doctor loves, and who he cannot outlive. a reminder of rose's boundless capacity for love, and ten can barely even bring himself to look him in the eyes.

by the time ten meets him for a second time, when the daleks invade, jack is already older than him. jack is more than a thousand years older than him, in fact, because he was buried alive in 27ad and was forced to live for a millennia as a prisoner to the earth and to his own brother. jack finds a new family, finds somebody to love, and they all die. rose gets an imitation of the doctor to love in a world that isn't really her own; their lives will be a blink that the others won't get to see. the doctor also finds love and a family, and also loses them - every version of them.

they meet in a prison millions of lightyears away from where they first met – thousands of years after, depending on who you ask – because jack heard that the doctor needed help. he's barely aged; the doctor has had two faces between this one and last time. she recognises him immediately, though he mistakes someone else for her.

they still remember rose.

[corazondebeskar-reads]

of rage and ruin - chapter eight

chapter eight

series masterlist | prev chapter | next chapter

werewolf!alpha!Joel Miller x f!omega!reader

word count: 4.1k

summary: joel's lies and the creeping winter breed discontent as the raiders wait to find out the fate of the man you bit.

chapter warnings: dark, dead dove do not eat, a/b/o, alpha/omega dynamics, omegaverse, captivity, canon-typical violence, genre-typical violence, horror themes, graphic violence, abuse by captors (not by either joel or reader), body horror, viewer discretion is advised, mention of attempted sexual assault (NOT by joel, very unsuccessful), oral, p in v, discussion of dub-con and I guess mind-control?

also on ao3

dividers by @saradika-graphics

Tommy Miller wasn’t a man of faith. Never really had been, and especially not now, not after the things he’d seen. Couldn’t fathom the thought of any god who’d let the world go to hell, who’d let his niece die in her father’s arms before she even really got to live. 

He doesn’t believe in much, never has, but he’d put all his faith in Joel. Always had. His first steps were toward Joel. His first word was his name. All his life, he’d followed his brother, even as they fell darker and darker into the end of the world. Even as Joel went down a road he thought he’d never have to follow. 

It was all for Tommy, anyway. He couldn’t turn away from the monster Joel became when it was all to keep Tommy alive. So when Joel turned into a literal monster, straight outta the movies they’d stayed up far too late to watch when Tommy was far too little? 

That was nothin’. A no-brainer. Joel was Joel. You don’t turn your back on your brother, even if he turns all hairy and slobbery and weird. 

So if there had been anyone left in the world who knew them, who had seen the Miller brothers grow, they’d have said it was no surprise that the little one refused to give up when things seemed hopeless. 

Inseparable, they’d say. 

After Joel went missing, one year turned into two, and Tommy Miller never gave up on his brother. 

“Maybe he doesn’t want to be found,” Laura said one night over rabbit stew. 

“Nah,” Tommy said, blowing on a spoonful before feeding it to her littlest one — DJ, after her brother, the dead beta — “He wouldn’t have done that to me. If he’s out there, he’s in trouble.”

Laura looked skeptical, but Tess nodded from the other end of the table, wagging her spoon in their direction.

“He’s right. That cranky old bastard mighta given anyone else the slip, but not Tommy.” Tess always sat at the far end, keeping distance between herself and the rambunctious children with razor-sharp teeth. 

“I’m not interested in runnin’ around buck naked, howlin’ at the moon, or dying from a toddler bite,” she’d said. But it didn’t stop her from showing up every new moon for dinner. 

Not more than that, though. She couldn’t bear to see the hope living in Tommy’s heart any more than he could bear to see the pity in her eyes. They all thought Joel was dead. All but Tommy.

“If you’d just turn me,” he tries.

Laura rolls her eyes. “You know it’s not that simple. My bite probably couldn't even turn you. Chances are you’d just... die.” 

“If he dies, I get to shoot her,” Mike says to Cheryl. He’s the other half of the Idiot Twins, you’ve learned. Mike and Randall. Randall’s the one kicking around all pissy in your old cell with the crescent of your teeth debossed in his skin. 

Mike’s the one bitching up and down the hall, shotgun on his shoulder.

Cheryl doesn’t give a shit. She’s only interested in what might happen if Randall doesn’t kick the bucket. 

“The hell you do,” she sneers. “She’s worth too much. Now shut it.”

You’re in the corner on the mattress, Joel’s furry body between you and the door. His hackles haven’t settled, and neither has the tense line of his shoulders. You haven’t spoken since Cheryl came down to watch, but Joel’s kept his eyes on the shotgun the entire time.

You don’t need to talk to know he’s thinking about putting himself between you and a bullet. Your hand finds its way to the thick fur on his neck, weaving gently between tufts. 

It’s not as comforting as it was. 

And oh, he can tell. It hurts. It took him less than a day after your heat ended to start to lose you, and the worst part is that he doesn’t know if he even wants to do what he’d have to, to admit to you that even though he’d never, that he could. He could make you do anything he commanded. 

You’ve been right all this time. Being an omega ain’t fair. He has all the power, and you have all the vulnerability, exposed to him like a wound. Like the one he’s left on your shoulder.

So he’s gotta be the shield, too. The bandage. He’s gonna be the barrier between you and everything that threatens to infect you. Even himself.

Especially himself. 

After the third day passes, the only infection Randall’s gotten from you was the festering bite mark. And really, that wasn’t even from you; that was from locking him in that nasty room with an open wound. That’s kind of on them.

He goes upstairs with Cheryl and never comes back. It’s not just Joel from whom they don’t tolerate disobedience.

Mike sulks but doesn’t try to retaliate. He must be too chicken-shit after seeing what happened to his buddy. They still make him deliver food, but he’s got a new partner now, who doesn’t seem too fond of him. Meal drop-off is a no-nonsense silent affair now, which suits you just fine. 

The difference between you and them has never been clearer. Not just in that you’re the captives, and they’re your captors. Not just in the sickening way they decide if you lived or died.

No. You’re finally seeing it. What they’ve seen all along—the difference between human and something undeniably more.

It’s stark, now. You’re not sure if something changed about you, physically, after your heat, or if it just laid clear the things that changed with the shot. But you can’t pretend anymore, either way. You’re not human. You’re not like them. You never were, really, but now it’s in your goddamn genetic code.

The man wrapped around you is even less of a man, but you think you’re starting to catch up.

He stays resolutely the wolf, but you don’t mind. You haven’t felt much like talking lately, anyway. You’ve gone quiet. It’d be unsettling if you hadn’t sunken to his level of grunts and huffs and whines. 

Why talk when he can’t talk back? Why talk when you already know what he’s saying? When he can understand you better now than ever before?

There’s no need for a charade between you. You’re beasts together. The bite you shared is more of a bridge between you than a bond, but that’s okay. 

Neither one of you were looking to be tied together, anyway. 

The strange, serene silence lasts until the new moon. He doesn’t have much choice, and you’re feeling it, too. The fatigue. The wariness. The loss of security. With the light of the moon in absentia, you’re left undone.

So you put each other back together.

You wake to his hairy face, but it’s human hairy. His coarse salt-and-pepper beard. His morose hazel eyes. 

“Look—” he starts, voice extra gruff from neglect, but you find you’re uninterested in his excuses. 

You kiss him instead, craning your neck to reach his chapped lips, a hand cupping that handsome beard. 

One of his huge hands goes to your waist immediately as he clings to your subject change with relief. 

There’s no trace of heat, now, nor rut. Just you. Just him. His hand, calloused and hot, leaves a trail across your bare skin, achingly gentle. 

You let yourself be coddled, this once. Let him treat you like something precious. Something worth preserving. No claws or fangs, just the warmth of his palm cupping your breast, the heat of his tongue on your nipple. 

A trail of ticklish kisses down your stomach that makes you squirm for more than one reason. When he parts your thighs to make room for himself, it’s as if he’s setting out the fine china. 

Before, he’d always dove in, like seeking the antidote to a snake bite. Eager to gulp down as much of you as fast as he could.

This time, he doesn’t rush. They won’t take him out tonight on the new moon. They’ve given up on making him useful when he's useless. He’s grateful, for once, for his weakness, because it means he can be yours. 

And you? Well. You’re always his. But now he can take his time with you.

His lips brush your thighs, gentle bites with blunt teeth interspersing the worshipful kisses. He presses them to the seam of your cunt, not opening you for him yet, just kissing along your labia and basking in your scent. It’s heady, even when it’s not fragrant with fertility. 

He parts your lips with his tongue. No greedy fingers rend you, just the soft swipe, barely ducking between. He does it, again and again, until he works you wide and waiting. 

A smirk spreads when you gasp at the bump of his nose against your clit, but he doesn’t leave you wanting. He graces it with a tender kiss that leaves you writhing, panting, trying to cant up to meet him. 

He lets you. But he doesn’t let your mewls rush him. He leaves you clit throbbing and drags his attention down to where you weep for him. The noises alone are debauched, echoing in the old shower room, his groans and licks melting into your gasps and cries. 

Your chest aches. It aches with need, with want, yes, but also with a strange sadness. It’s bleeding from him into you. It seems to never leave him, not for a moment, and it drives your hands to his hair, a poor facsimile of the connection you both need and cannot allow yourselves to have. 

It’s enough, though, for now. He’s pleased that he’s pleased you, and doesn’t relent. It’s as much for you as it is for him. He alternates between softly suckling at your clit and licking you clean until he’s drawn two saccharine orgasms from you, leaving you trembling and covered in sweat. 

When he comes back up to meet you, cock resting against your cunt, you take his kiss greedily, and give in. More and more, every moment you’re his, you become wilder. Claimed but not kept. Bound but not burdened. You lick your slick from his beard in a manner more affectionate than arousing. He interrupts, kissing your neck and pushing you down onto the mattress so he can ease his length inside you.

There’s no resistance. You’re soaked and stretched, his thick fingers having reached inside to take his prize from within you. You breathe again once he’s nestled deep within, feeling the pulse and press of him where no man other than him can rightfully claim to have been. 

He rocks his hips, barely pulling out, unwilling to leave the wet heat of you. It’s arduous and delicious, savoring him like this. Feeling the curves and veins of him against your walls, imprinting themselves on you. 

Even now, even fully human, you don’t trouble yourselves with talk. Your ragged breaths fill the room, and he chases your lips for a kiss each time he bottoms out. They’re almost chaste, if only they weren’t so filthy. There’s barely any tongue, and yet, more intense than any you’ve had before. 

You come again as he fills you, spilling deep and letting you both savor the sensation. 

When he pulls out, you shiver. The chill that spreads over you has as much to do with the things left unsaid as it does with the cold basement. You only have the one bra to wear, after all. He tucks the little blanket around you, but it’s a lost cause. 

Neither of you are sure that you want his body heat, with the way things have frosted over after your parting. He waits, eyes closed, until he feels you curl up to him. 

Once you’re tucked into the crook of his arm, his leg slung over you, you finally say it. The two words that have been ricocheting around in your brain since that day.

“You lied,” you whisper to his chest. It stutters as he slips on a breath.

“I did,” he agrees after a long, long moment.

“To me,” you clarify. 

“Yes.”

It’s heavy. It’s loud. Much louder than reality, where it’s whispered, but in your head, it falls with a flat thump.

“You were already scared. I didn’t want to scare ya more,” he says. It doesn’t come out like an excuse. It’s not defensive. It’s just a fact.

Maybe he didn’t mean it as such, but that’s how you take it. You were scared. You were terrified. 

“I don’t care,” you decide. “That’s not how this is gonna work. We’re—we’re stuck together for now whether we like it or not ,and you are not going to decide what I can or can’t handle.” You poke him in the chest with the finger you were inadvertently waggling.

For now? Oh, sweetheart, he thinks, gut aching at your—he suspects—willful naivety. He raises both hands in supplication.

“Alright, darlin’,” he capitulates, gruffer than he means to. 

The way he gives in without a fight but also without an apology stings, but you resolve to lick your wounds later when you’re not itching for a fight. 

“And you better explain. Now. No runnin’.” 

He puts his arms down, and they melt into a slump of a heavy sigh. “I don’ know much. I never do. You ask me all these damn questions when I’ve told you —”

“Stop deflectin’ and fess the fuck up, Joel,” you snap.

He glowers for a moment before sitting up a little to lean against the frigid tile wall. “I suppose…” but he just sighs again.

But you sit up, criss-cross applesauce with the blanket around your lap. And you wait. You’re pretty sure he’ll talk, given his own time to do it. Where your mind never seems to settle, his seems to take a while to boot up. He isn’t stupid by any means; he just needs a minute to organize what he’s trying to explain. 

You’re rewarded for scraping up what was left of your patience when he crosses his arms over his chest. 

“I don’t know much. That ain’t ever gonna change. But this was somethin’ I learned from the widow o’ the man that bit me.”

“Ew, wait, you actually got bitten?” 

He rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah. Look, don’ worry about that. I keep forgettin’ you were one o’ the experiments.”

You gape at him for a moment. “Eugh,” you shudder. “Fuck, I hate that. Experiment. Damn.”

He gives a little ‘well?’ with the splay of his palms to the sky and watches you with eyes of lead. “Look,” he sighs again. 

You imagine a drinking game involving his sigh count would send you to a swift and shallow grave.

“Y’ain’t gonna like it, but it’s true. To some extent, omegas seem to be… more inclined to listen to an alpha if the alpha talks with a certain tone of voice. S’hard to explain.”

“You’ve done it before,” you guess. “Not just to me.”

“No,” he sighs, and in an imaginary alternate universe, you die of liver poisoning, “not just to you.”

And he tells you of the early days with Laura. When the change first started, and he couldn’t sleep, thinkin’ he might hurt somebody. Somebody that didn’t deserve it. 

“And she told me that Peter would drop his voice into this kind of… register, and he would talk her to sleep. Except one night he was tired himself and didn’t have the energy. So all he said to her was ‘go to sleep.’ And she did.”

“That’s… fucking horrible,” you say. “Not their cutesy couple-y stuff. The… Jesus, the implications of that kind of…” 

Suddenly, you look down at the blanket, picking with the jagged tip of your bitten fingernail at where the ancient fleece was pilling. 

“You, um…” but the words get caught in your chest where someone has tightened a belt, cutting off all connection to the rest of your body, leaving it cold. A thousand logical, reasonable thoughts traverse your conflicted brain. You don’t know him. He’s got a darkness to him. He kills on the regular to keep himself alive. You don’t know him.

But you don’t think he’s the type of man to have done something quite like that. And he’s been nothing but gentle with you, really. Too gentle, like he thought the lightest touch of a claw might split you like a plump plum, skin stretching and giving way for him to flay the flesh underneath. 

You’re made of tougher stuff than that. Mostly. Kind of. In a way.

Oh, damnit. 

“What did you use it on me for?” you say instead. 

His teeth grind at what you almost asked. He figures you were afraid to piss him off by asking. Or afraid for him to lie to your face again. He should be insulted that you’d even consider the possibility that he violated you. 

He reminds himself that you don’t know him. He’s bigger than you, stronger. And he’s just told you he can more or less hypnotize you. 

Shit, this is a right hell of a mess.

You both sigh this time, and you’ve already forgotten your imaginary drinking game self’s corpse. You can feel it this time. The weariness. How it soaks into the marrow and flushes everything out. 

“You need to understand,” he starts seriously. His brows are pinched and eyes narrowed, pitching a sturdy fence around his too-fragile self. “I did not do anything…unsavory. And I didn’t even mean to do it to ya in the first place.”

He scrubs a hand over his face again, and it’s ruddy when he pulls away. “It was durin’ your heat, okay? It wasn’t even anything serious; I just told you to listen to me, and you did. And I…” he grunts and looks away.

You think maybe all this time alone made him forget how to say sorry. 

You’re not sure what you’d do with it anyway.   

So instead, you close your eyes and take a deep breath in your nose and out of your mouth. You think vaguely about being nauseous or anxious or infuriated. You indulge in the fantasy of getting truly angry, of letting yourself feel the injustice of it all, the horror.

You entertain thoughts of screams of rage, of violence, of throwing and breaking and banging your fists against the wall, of wrapping your hands around Jim’s throat, of driving yourself mad and bloody in a frenzy for freedom.

The thoughts hurt as much as they help. You take the rage and prod at it until it hides back behind your ribs where it belongs. 

He leans forward, now, elbows on his knees. It’s hard not to be distracted by his dick, but also, you always feel guilty when you ogle it. It’s not his fault he’s been denied of any privacy or dignity. And plus, you’ve been walking around, pussy out, since your heat.

Thinking about that too much makes you sick. 

He sighs again but you feel like maybe this one cost him something more. He sits up straight and puts his hands on your shoulders. “I can’t promise it won’t happen by accident,” he says solemnly.

You chew on it for a while, climbing into his lap and pulling the blanket over yours. He’s trying, and you’re having a hard time staying mad, especially when he’s warm and comfortable.

His arms loop loosely around you, unconsciously rubbing his thumbs against your bare skin. It’s soothing, but you suspect it’s even more soothing for him. 

Your head finds its place in the crook of his shoulder, and it’s your turn again to sigh. “You think maybe I could learn to resist it?” 

He startles a little, looking down at you incredulously. No, looking down at you like you’re something incredible. That’s worse, maybe, because it makes you squirm away from his (albeit minimal) idolatry. 

“Maybe. I don’t know enough about it. But would you even want to try? It would mean me havin’ to…”

“I dunno,” you admit. “Might be worth it. I’ll… I’m gonna think about it.”

He takes what he can take and presses a kiss to the top of your head, a compulsion that’s rapidly becoming habitual. 

Not that either of you are complaining. 

When you think of it again later, in the dead of night, Joel sawing lumber while half-sprawled on the floor, it settles like cement in your lungs. 

He settles like cement in your lungs. Something neither your mind nor body can ignore. And maybe it’s the bond, but you know there’s no chipping him out of there. Not completely. This strange man, who isn’t so strange these days, has instead become something of a warm knit cardigan or a rail on a slippery stair. 

Maybe you don’t need him.

Maybe you’d get by without him.

But, well. You’re better off with him than without. 

Time in your little cell passes all at once and not at all. Winter creeps in, and the basement becomes nearly unbearably cold. You watch jealously as Joel retreats to his built-in jacket, and as much as he tries to be your personal furnace, it only goes so far.

And the full moon comes, and brings a blizzard with it. 

You think maybe they won’t go out, but Jim’s got a particular target in mind nearby that he demands retribution from. And no silly snowstorm is going to stop him.

They take him from you at nightfall, and he watches you shiver as he leaves.

It must be Christmas, because he comes back with a gift.

You honest to god gasp when he shows you his prize. “Thanks, Santa!” you tease, and he rolls his eyes.

“Arms up,” he says, and you let him have this. You think the wolf must be going out of his mind with possessiveness, and you’re right because he can barely stay only partially transformed. He struggles not to give in to the change, fighting his own instincts and the moon just so he can talk to you.

You don’t say it, but that almost means more than the gift.

You close your eyes as he tugs the ratty sweater over you, either oversized or from a very large man. It fits like a dress, though a very short one. But it means your ass isn’t hanging out, and you’ve got another layer between your poor freezing tits and the breeze that whispers through the rotting grout. 

“Joel, how—”

But he cuts you off. “Don’t ask me, darlin’. You don’t wanna know.” He’s a little tender but a little sharp, too.

“But where—“

“I said don’t ask me that,” he snarls. “Do not fucking ask me that.” He sees the look on your face and softens. “Please.” It’s a whisper, and oh, it hurts. 

You don’t have to ask. You know, now. What it cost him. What it cost someone else. “Thank you, alpha,” you murmur. It has the usual effect, his eyes shining a little brighter as you play with the wolf and let the man be. 

He pulls you against his chest and rubs his chin on the top of your head, soothing the unease in his sternum. “It fucking stinks, though. Gonna have to figure somethin’ out.”

You wrinkle your nose. “It’s not bad.”

“It’s not me,” he grunts, and you take the cue to shut up. 

“Atta girl,” he murmurs after a few minutes of silence. “Looks real nice,” he adds and preens when the compliment sends you shyly snuffling your face into his chest. 

You let him hold you there as he scents you, bafflingly large palms smoothing over your neck and rubbing your arms. His musk envelopes you as much as his broad body does, and you keep your cheek pressed against the soft quilt of hair across his chest. When he’s mostly wolf like this, he’s practically covered in it. His soft, strong arms are dark with it; his chest is buried beneath it; it even trails across the plush pouch of his stomach. 

When he’s done proverbially bathing you in him, he steps back, cheeks ruddy and dark eyes anywhere but you. He clears his throat but says nothing. 

You observe him, this forsaken beast of a man. This creature from children’s nightmares, this creature who definitely just gave adults nightmares, but who would put himself between you and your own. 

You close the gap between you, your hand on his chest, another finding its way to his cheek. His eyes stutter and fall closed, only the tiniest sigh escaping him now. A shuddering thing full of far too much for one man, whether he’s actually a man or a beast. 

“Thank you, Joel,” you whisper, as if you could ease his aches with your gratitude. As if you could take on some of his pain for your own. 

He kisses you like he knows you’d try.

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