#drunkwritings

[thepathetickind]

I'm crying without a sound,

by laurenmaerie, in the morning

[spicywarl0ck]

Happy Friday! “Have I ever lied to you?” “Are you really asking me that?” for Neve and Rook. I feel like they both have some secrets.

Happy Friday! Thank you so much for the prompt, it ended a bit more fluffy but I hope that's okay still? @dadrunkwriting Veilguard Pairing: Neve Gallus/female Rook (Asha Mercar) Length: 597 Rating: T Spoilers for Veilguard <3 “So, about the new apartment, I might have found a place.”

“Didn’t we agree that I’ll handle that?” Neve looked up from her borrowed desk, her hands holding onto multiple parchments. There was a cease between her brows which always tended to build up whenever she tried to figure out her next case. 

“We did, but we can’t live in the former Shadowdragon’s hideout forever, so… I thought it would be nice to look at a nice apartment I found in Docktown. You’ll like it. I promise.” 

Neve looked at her as her brows arched slightly, her lower lip drawn in. 

“What’s the catch?”

“There is no catch, I promise. It’s a nice apartment in Docktown, no unruly neighbours, or not too unruly at least.” Asha’s ears twitched as she recalled what her contact told her. “Oh, and the cobbled Swan is not that far away, so we can always grab a drink or two when we’re out,” she added, but Neve’s face didn’t change as she watched her with scepticism. 

“Aww come on, have I ever lied to you?” There was a known twinkle in Asha’s dark brown eyes. Neve knew it too well.

“Are you really asking me that?” The female detective scoffed, but a smile danced around the corners of her lips, making her face appear a tad softer. “I can barely count, anymore,” she added with a chuckle.

“Fine, Elek told me about it. But the threads aren’t too bad, once you know them better right? He said he owes us anyway, and we’re always free to take a look and then be done with it if we don’t want it. I just…” Asha paused, calmly studying Neve’s face while searching for the right words.

“I feel like it’s the least I can do. For you… and for us.” She was used to wearing her heart on her tongue, which brought her trouble more often than she could count.

Yet, sometimes she felt at a loss for words when she looked at Neve, the person who meant the most to her and who she wanted to have a life to look forward to, instead of the suffering she lived through.

“You are doing more than enough.” Neve’s voice softened when she stood up, her hair falling loose over her shoulders, shifting with her steps as the metal of her prosthetic clanked over the floor.

Her hands were warm when she took Asha’s, her stare so intense, Asha was certain she looked right into her soul.

“What happened to Minrathous wasn’t your fault.” Her voice was quiet yet strong at the same time. “I know I blamed you for a long time, and I know I did because I felt sadness, anger and despair at the same time. Minrathous was our home, and I couldn’t comprehend why it needed to suffer. But the choice you had to make was an impossible one.” she paused as she leaned her head against Asha’s, the touch ever so soft.

“I’m sorry you had to carry that Burden, and I admire your strength. If it would have been me…”“You’d have chosen Minrathous,” Asha concluded, smiling sadly. “I’m sorry you lost your home. But I’ll do all I can to get you another one. A nice one.” Rook added with a chuckle. “I promise I won’t let you down again.” “Promises, promises. You’ll just bring more trouble into my life, trouble.” Neve’s hands held onto hers tighter as she pulled Asha forward, their lips almost touching. “But I’m ready for it,” she added, just before their lips met.

[ewaneneollav]

if they had like sellers of flowers by regina spektor or small red boy by ajj. i wanto send you every song ive cataloged as having ability to make me cry (or once having it). maybe i do comfortably numb even though i wish it could be The Bad Plus cover not the original. i havent even listened to original enough to remember how pacing of the lyrics might differ -_- who put THOSE lyrics in the hands of guys who would put a Guitar Solo in a song...THEY HAVE WINDMILLS OF YOUR MIND

the SINGLE drain gang song they have is western union which if they had to have only one it could b much less perfect than that. i wish they had gallery piece by of montreal. oh, wuthering heights they have it, im singing it, its settled, they have it - of course they have it - but - its settled

its funny to hear the bar owner list artists to someone each prefaced with "we've got," nooo Your App has got....

i think i would be at home in the world where anyone who went to a karaoke bar would have the inclination to go on the mic and apply some kind of parodic dj personality to their choice of songs and commentate between lines but it's by these sorts of metrics that i determine that in the overall reality that prevails i am not at home. also im totally in like the Drunk Texting Zone for about the past two hours preemptive apologies haha now that ive given that disclaimer i want to rant about literally anything. action button reviews boku no yatsuyasume. like i cant pretend to keyed into that dudes work at all [beyond] that one. but like i find inspiration just in the way he speaks in it. like it not even gotta be about the shit you SAY The Ineffable can prevail and inspire just in your intonation. i like the way you ([C]) talk too, i think ive already caught myself intermittently interjecting elements of it ; Soju ;

today the thing that sent me into a fugue was like grieved awareness of how much living in _ killed my fucking heart, like the innate voracious curiosities that feel like they die if there's no one to talk about them with, like i know i had the internet for talking to anyone and everyone really, and that's a great (like UNFATHOMABLY great) mercy... but, and yet, that shit also feels fake if there's like NO ONE to talk with directly, it's like ",shut up and eat ur computer scraps lowly dog," so i just stop caring that much in _. and then finally go out elsewhere where it's like. I think this is how much I would have cared if exploration had done anything for me beyond the purely solipsistic element.

i think what im saying is that im not sure u can understand just how much [ur casual speaking to all about the nature inclinity of exploration [ as if it didnt feel to me like a miracle]] privately quietly does to me , altho maybe (for all i know) u can understand ; but um that's the grief that fugued me today this morning, to feel my hunger starved out and killed yet still abstractly detectable within myself as a thing i can still recognize yet no longer intact enough to readily like relate to anyone around. ABSOLUTELY LITANY of drunkwriting so umm yeah i preemptively apologize and let up now [glad to know u] [[song interpolating Genius Of Love on the p.a.]]

[...]

h, oh omg, auto correct fucked my message, i meant, can't to being keyed in at all except beyond the boku no natsuyasume review. unspeakably surreal thing just happened

SAME

with the person who came back in and explained being a psychotherapist and gave me copious hugs. im like too drubk to even internalize it

guy literally prayed for me on the street. thought he was flirting w me but he left immediately after

and like this person twice my agr talking to me about their trauma. omg

it was a really good prayer and not like the most common possible one. he said he hopes all my doubts get resolved and i can move on from the things ill never have closure on

my day was altered by prayer once in like 2017

WHAT WAS ITTT

like me and two people and none believed but it was really depressive and the mood was reset by strangers prayer. just the ritual of it

im like really fucking religious im not Christian or anything but my weird vague theism/sheilaism thing makes me feel deeply connected to strangers prayer. i love to love. i live to liv

i love to love

i pray for prayer etc

[...]

whoever abstractly prayed for me has vanished within the fuzz of my drunken morass but such is life and i greatly encourage them in their capacity as a therapist. ok that person's offer to buy me additional bottle of soju was generous but unknowingly a bit much. im on like verge of hand on shoulder mode

[...]

just bide my time til i feel more normal simple yeeaa

oh no how much did you drink, r u near ur home

i def got like sicklydrunk just cuz that person's soju they bout my was literally one more than necessary but id say im ok now, and my lyft home is like video nearby and id say when i go home im not gonna get work tomorrow and im gonna get very good rest.. the autocorrects are 😂, funny*, ", video nearby," and it like replaced funny with a laughing emoji it's like recursing on itself, sory for like wackydrunk but we can call it even on it catching us off guard X) ,& i like knowing u

we don't have to believe in anything in particular to still believe in tgings and pacts that only work if we believe in them, i think it can be really hard to give faith and i empathize with that difficulty a lot, to just trust the world, to do what it needs to do, but life like part of the human condition is even when u trust the world u just endorse ur own PROJECTION of what u think the world wants to do and its confusing, but we got dis and my lyft driver just dropped me off at home

id say at this point "sleepy and safe and lying on my futon," but damn lying on the hard floor of the laundry room of my buildings common area kinda perfect rn, its warmer

THAT SOUNDS NICE

see like there's something i find paradoxically cozy about sleeping where ur not sposed to that just patently is not cozy, it makes me think of like a shelter dog that Likes being in a cage, but like u know who the cartoon sleeping posture of putting their hands together and then lying their head on their hands is kinda real, like the hands r actually cozy, its like watchin the fuckin "DVD" logo bounce off the sides of the tv for six hours cause u gotta be quiet till sunrise so u cant do shit else

like i encounter lots of tedious situations but if i could just parse them all in the manner of the tedium of the dvd logo then itd all be fine "we r the rats in the garbage of the western world so lets dance" luv u stephin merritt, bro that person was so unspeakably nice to me but they should've been nice to the EXACT extent that stopped at buying me an extra soju thstt last soju got me fucked uoy otherwise i met a guardian angel who only needs to figure out when they needa buy someone soju i liked i like

scratched their head all over and said ",thd world needs so much light" i did t ever know who they were i [was] just like ok they seem tolerant and like they give light. light

special

[beetlekiss]

drunkwriting. Absolute Cinema

[virtuadmin]

Running out of room for #typewriters 😅 Moving on to badges now!! Who agrees with this?? Hoping everyone's #Wednesday is going as well as it can. 🥰 #writing #typing #writedrunkeditsober #typewriterbadge #vintagetypewritercollector #badges #drunkwriting #drunkwritings #editsober #blackandwhitebadge #wednesdayafternoon #snowydays (at United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CLHXn3WjGlI/?igshid=4oyupj1pv1z5

[himbo-beel]

@minniboe

“It won’t fit’ you said but didn’t either didn’t care or didn’t hear you. He was too focused on the item in front of him, eyes wide and mouth open.

“It can.” He seemed more determined than anything. But still you’re ere worried. What if it was too much? You’d seen him take things only half this size but this? It was big. It was wide. It was long.

“But-“

He shot you a look and took it in his hands, mouth watering. Drool slipped down his cheek when he opened his lips.

“Beel-“ but you had nothing to worry about because he swallows the giant cannoli in one bite.

[barelynakedthoughts]

Well, then...

Fuck me.

Nine days after my fourteen day period, I'm bleeding again. I slightly bled two days ago after sex. Now I'm drunk, blogging and bleeding.

I dont want to give up, but it feels like I'm never going to be pregnant. Nothing matters...everything is worthless and I'm useless. Yeah. I'm blessed. I'm rich in love, gifts...whatever, but the most important desire in my life since I was young--having a biological child, is far from my grasp.

My body is broken. I'm broken. I'm officially worth nothing compared to the years of dreaming of pregnancy and motherhood. Today is a dark day...

I can't even call the doctor tomorrow to tell them I'm on my first day of my period because it is a Saturday. I'm supposed to call on the first day of my cycle to figure out my fertility test days and now I'm stuck waiting all weekend to call my doctor.

Timing. Frustration. Demise.

Weakness.

[jasheemwilson]

Current Writing Situation So, this is happening. Pain, hurt, anger. #shewasafriendofmine7 #brokenheart #hornitos #drunkwriting #writing #weareaambc #writer #author #comingsoon https://www.instagram.com/p/BuZu0AUDkLJ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=mhonqsvik3sp

[readtypewrite-blog]

Drunk.

So I said I was going to write every day and I almost forgot about today.

See, this is what happens when I get home from work and also want to have a life. Then I’m not at home to write. 

Lucky - see, I was in the shower ready for bed when I remembered I hadn’t yet written today. Lucky I had a semi-intoxicated revelation... that I hadn’t written yet.

Yesterday I tried to be a bit fancy with my handwritten journal entry. Wrote about a dream I had. It wasn’t as interesting once put down on pen and paper but it was thrilling in my head. 

In other news, I was interviewed by someone today and it was the most expedient way to learn that I was, in fact, a spectacularly ordinary and dull person. 

Thank ye for listening oh internet. I send these words out into the nether and somehow my soul is freed but a little.

What the actual fuck am I on about now. About time I drank some water and went to bed.

[thepathetickind]

a beautiful morning, it’s snowing outside my window the room is filled with warmth and a lovely song, so I'm crying without a sound, why am I like this when you are actually my happiness?

by laurenmaerie, in the morning

[coloringtheworldwithwords]

I miss the sounds of the highway, the open window, breeze blowing between my fingers. The city lights always promised that I was never alone, but the sea so quickly sleeps when the sun sets, and I’ve always been scared of the dark. You see, I’ve thought a lot about why the ocean has left me empty, why I yearn for the buildings and the street lights, why I miss the dull hum of tires spinning fast on the 4 lane track. Time has taught me that I enjoy solitude amongst a crowd, that the ocean provides no comfort when the light isn’t shining on it, I, can’t see the moon from my window, and I, can’t trust the promise of a new day without a little guidance. So, I’m trying to trust myself, to know that I am made up of more than this moment, that I am not greedy for missing the skylines, that I still can love an ocean sunset, but fear the darkness it brings. And it is so dark where I sit, clouds covering the stars, the moon, hidden somewhere far away from me. I want the whisper of traffic shuffling about, the dim lights in the distance, promising that someone somewhere, is awake and looking for the answers too. I’ve done my time in the darkness, it’s time to be among the places that dream while awake, the places that are too busy to settle for the shadows. I guess I’m not as in love with the ocean as I thought, (coloringtheworldwithwords)

[godsickk]

-- O BRIDE OF WRATH! O font of righteous fury! Deliver us from the plagues of earth and water, of air and fire! Give us the strength to endure; to protect one another until the day you arrive to protect us all once again. Torch in the frozen dark, shade in the white light, pillar of hope -- may our belief strengthen you, even as our prayers burden you. May your commandments guide us until your return. May our efforts in this final trial please you! May you judge us anew and find us worthy of your salvation! O RADIANCE, CROWNED IN BLOOD .... 

[lepusrufus]

Me repeating my bestie's advice in my head every single time I write anything: Drunkwrite now edit later. Drunkwrite now edit later. Drunkwrite now edit later. Drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite now edit later drunkwrite-

[dreadfutures]

every fucking time i think youve hit your peak in making me feel emotion you turn around a top it. god damn that but for drunkwritting?

I'm horrified and intrigued and so damn sad for the ones that died. And that ixchel is, I supposed the words aren't curious but I'm not sure what a more proper word would be, about what happened.to the point she's letting in the spirits so she can find out??? I feel that so hard. That dispair and hunger are the spirits is absolutely chilling. It's a warm summer day in Florida and I'm shivering. I love it.

Thank you! I was absolutely inspired by a similar scene in The Masked Empire, where Felassan and Briala are affected by the spirits of Elvhen slaves left to die after all the eluvians cut out. The idea just fit so perfect with Ixchel's budding channeling ability and her dedication to learning and retelling the stories of what came before. That's always her thing, always what she tells Solas and the Elvhen who want to return to what they lost: there is new life in the retelling, but we need not return.

It has to bite her in the ass sometime, you know? Not every Spirit is Glory (beloved).

thank you so much bb I love you, this really brightened my morning right after I woke up 😭🥰

[silent-of-spirit]

Can I have a Solavellan tickle fight-gone-real-fight?!

@dadrunkwriting

Hoo boy. HOOOO BOY. Tweaked for mass heartbreak, as per request. HOO BOY. My heart hurts. Most of it under cut for length.

Solas x Aluriel

Post-Trespasser

It flits across her memory at times,his laughter- joyous and abundant, but only with her. They always lettheir reservations fall away when in the presence of each other…free to be their truest selves.

Or- shewas her truest self. He had always kept secrets, locked from hereyes, but never from her knowledge. She knew he hid from her, thoughnot to what extent. She wished his betrayal tainted her memories ofhim- but they could not. She had never felt such a sense of rightthan when she was beside him, her doubts fading away into perfectclarity. There had been many things she was unsure of, but neverthat. Never him.

Shewished…

Sheremembered when he had discovered she was ticklish- eyes wide at thesqueak that fled her lips at his accidental contact, then thedevilish smirk. He dove after her, expertly catching her around thewrists despite her attempts to evade him, taking advantage of theopening to coax more laughter. He had laughed too, as lost in thesilliness as she was. It was one of her brightest memories of themboth, how she had turned the tables and captured him in return, howplayful laughter had morphed into sweet sighs and the slide of theirbodies.

Butthat was so long ago now, and there was nothing sweet left- onlybitterness and pain. He left a hole in her heart that time could notfill, and now she was cold.

So cold.

Liahrahad tried to redeem him, but he would not be won over- resolute inhis plan. So many had suffered, had died, had burned,but they were not people to him.

Alurielcould not find it in her heart to hate him for it, no matter how shetried. Oh, but she wanted to.

Andnow she lay in her tent, sleep evading her as she agonized overmemories of better times, knowing they would never be again. TheInquisitor and her armies would face him tomorrow, and Aluriel wouldbe by their side, bent on taking down the man she loved.

Still, even now.

Sheclosed her eyes against the tears that threatened, and waited.

Whenthe horn sounded, she was already strapped into her armor, sharpeningthe blade on her staff with a singular mind. They march, and shegrows colder still, not allowing herself to feel for these waywardchildren of The People, fooled into thinking destruction was the wayback to greatness.

Deceiver.She tries to tell herself, but the word rings hollow. She blinks backtears.

Therewas a burst of fire, the field around them erupting into heat andash, and she doesn’t have time to think, to feel,she only acts, collapsing against her staff as the conjured blizzarddoes its work. It was difficult to breathe, her vision blurry, butshe sees the glint of golden armor and she knows.

“Solas.”His name is barely a whisper, stolen by the biting wind, and shestraightens. He is looking at her, tall and proud against the newsnow, and she pushes herself upright, clutching her staff withshaking hands. Then he is gone, back turned as he retreats from hersight.

“Fen'Harel!”She screams, suddenly finding the energy to pursue. She weavesthrough the combatants, unseeing, her eyes fixed on the gleam of hisarmor, the pride in the straightness of his back. She hates it. Shehates him, but… shedoesn’t. She can’t.

Hewon’t turn- he won’t lookat her, still walks away, forever away as he has already done twice.She will not allow him to do so again. She flings a bolt of ice athis back, sharp and glassy, screaming in frustration as it iscasually tossed to the side.

But hestops.

Shegrasps at the mana in her veins, shoots another, again tossed to theside before it reaches him. She drags in a ragged breath, reaches,and sends a volley, pressing forward even as each falls to the earth.

Finally-finally, he turns, metwith tears of anger and a face so hauntingly familiar and precious,it makes him ache. She is dragging, the power that she unleasheddraining her energy, but still she comes. She swings her staff, ablow easily sidestepped, and she screams again. She doesn’t knowwhere she finds the energy, but she swings again, pushing him backeven as he dodges every blow.

“Fightme!” Her voice is ragged, a pained edge to it that is impossible toignore. “Fight me, coward!”She screeches, calm facade only a distant memory. Now she is fire,vengeance, fury.

Sheslips and he falters just for a moment, but it is enough. He feelsher weave the fade around her fingertips just before she presses himback, back, back, collidingwith the trunk of a tree so hard it knocks the breath from his lungs.Her magic holds him there, feet dangling, the pressure on his throatonly slack enough to allow him breath.

She isshaking as she approaches, whether from exhaustion or adrenaline, heis unsure. There are tracks through the dirt on her face, tearsfalling where she could no longer hold them back.

“Fen'Harel.”She gasps, then laughs, breathless and a little wild. “We meetagain.” She lifts her staff, blade poised at the side of his neck,but stops. She closes her eyes, face contorting in agony, and againshe tries to press it forward, faltering at the last moment.

“Vhenan.”He says softly, sees her shudder.

“No.No.” She says shakily. “Don’t you dare.” Her voice cracks, rawemotion lacing every shuddering breath. He can feel where the bladerubs against his skin, trembling and unsure. “Don't” She saysagain, nearly sobbing it. Neither of them know for whom the word wasmeant.

He canhear it whistling through the air before he sees it, but he cannotstop it, eyes widening in horror as the arrow pierces her armor.

No.

The staff fallsfrom her hand, the other losing the grip on the magic that bound him.

“No!” Hebellows, catching her as she falls to her knees.

She laughs- abroken, wet sound that sends his heart plummeting. Her eyes are uponhis, large and sad and afraid, and again he could see thequestion there.

Why?

“Solas.”She whispers, voice pained. She touches his cheek with a tendernesshe had thought long forsaken. “I would have followed you.”

Thewords tear at his soul, a truth he had always known. He pushed her tothis, made her think this was the only course. His love had damnedher, and himself in the process. He can’t find the words to beg forher forgiveness in her last moments, a forgiveness he knows he doesnot deserve. He begs whatever powers still exist to spare her thisfate. He would give anythingto see her from his arms, safe and whole.

Please.

Hecannot stop the tears that fall, uncaring of the opinions of thosewho follow him. His heart lay in his arms looking up at him withthose eyes full of starlight, luminous and lovely, and he is lost.

“Iknow.”

[jasheemwilson]

Ok, we flowing a lil now... #shewasafriendofmine7 #weareaambc #writing #drunkwriting #manic https://www.instagram.com/p/BuZyUp_jYMk/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1tkvphfsnlme7