#dysphoria hacks

[peachybeins]

Striking a Chord at Randy's by K.C. Carmine M/M (Trans M/Cis M)

Idk gang...this one's bit unbalanced

Thoughts: If I was to describe this in terms of typical romance tropes it'll be; a (childhood) friends-to-FWBs-to-lovers bi awakening. I'm not someone who gets super into tropes but others are and might want to know.

A super exciting thing about this book is the series it's from; Diner Days. Diner Days is a multi-author contemporary trans romance "anthology" series that takes place in or involve a US 50s themed queer Diner called "Randy's", in some instalments the Diner is a more present location than others. All books in the series have at least one trans MC and a good chunk are t4t. It should be noted however that the series is weighted towards trans m/m & m/nb pairings, of the 11 books in the series only 2 are sapphic (f/f or f/nb) and there are no trans m/f pairings. Which is unfortunate for people looking for that type of representation.

EDIT: upon further research it turns out that there is one book; Aftercare at Randy's with a TF/NB/M, so there is technically on Transhet book although it's also F/Nb & M/NB

In theory this book should be (almost) everything I want in trans mlm, the tropes and kinks/sex acts, the relationship and personalities was coming up to be a cool 8-9/10 but the execution was just not it gang.

Simply put the writing wasn't good...When it comes to romance I have lowered standards for prose/writing, I don't expect lit-fic or even the average fantasy novel writing so I am lenient. Awkward phrasing in the narration, abuse of unrealistically verbose and introspective therapy speak in dialogue. And rather petty on my end misuse of the term "himbo"; the misogynistic/homophobic/toxic masculinity douchey gymbros at Trent's old gym will not be himbos! Himbos are nice! Also "muscle himbos" is redundant as himbo= buff anyhow, yeah it's petty but whatevs.

...We got strap sucking y'all!!! That alone saves this damn book lmao. So idc idc.

Which brings me to my next observation; the book was more explicit and had more kinks & fetishes in it than I was expecting. Like I went into this thinking it'll be some simple gay sex shit but Nope! Shit got wild as hell ☠ (positive).

Also massive props for the book acknowledging that vaginismus and HRT induced vaginal atrophy exist and will make frontal penetration painful and unpleasant.

A thing I apricated about the story is that both Trent and Charlie have goals outside of their relationship. From Charlie's music career to Trent getting the motivation to open his own inclusive gym. They do intersect with the romance and both are (obviously) supportive of the other's dreams. Another aspect I apricated was as positive and lowkey as this story was it didn't ignore the existence of homophobia. It's not "extreme" or hardcore and it fits with the vibe of the book...well vague spoilers but towards the end Charlie experiences something semi-based on anti queer bigotry. I do enjoy queer stories where bigotry doesn't exist or isn't acknowledged but sometimes I also like seeing the real shit. Although both their respective projects got achieved and wrapped up a bit too quickly. I won't necessarily fault the book for that, it's about novella length so there wasn't much space to go into detail, perhaps if the book was a bit longer, because there are books in this series double the length so it's not a case of wordcount restrictions.

Representation: white gay trans man MC, white bi/pan cis man MC, Lesbian Side characters, Trans woman side character

Terms Used: cock, t-dick/dick, packer, strap-on, ass/asshole, front hole

Sexual Content & Roles: Explicit sexual content. Strict top/bottom, trans top/cis bottom, size difference, Chastity kink/cock cage, orgasm denial, cum eating, felching, rimming, anal fingering, anal sex, nipple play, oral sex, light bondage, masturbation in front of partner, semi public sex, food play-kinda...lollipops were involved,

Potential dysphoric moments: N/A I guess

TW: mild references to/instances of homophobia, misogyny and toxic masculinity.

Rating: 5/10 🌟 Despite my less than glowing review, I do not dissuade others from picking up this book. It is a cute romance and those of us looking for trans men/masc tops can't be too picky.

[amatres]

playing ainsel truly made me realize i dont mind my characters being addressed with he/him IF theyre nonbinary about it

[butchbuckys]

It’s so funny like living in a bubble of shorties and dating a short king and just always being surrounded by women like I truly do not ever think about my height at all and how im ALSO short like

I’ve destroyed height dysphoria

[rosetintedblindfold]

The best thing about being a trans man and into hypnokink is that as a man I often forget I have tits and if I'm triggered into trance by tits I can distract myself reminding myself that I have them. These are mistress's. She owns me. These are hers. And if I'm staring at them I'm starting at Hers. And tits are my trigger.

[crytetrahavoc]

Man I wish I was capable of growing a happy trail. My tummy is so woefully bare.

[invisiblefoxfire]

Even if you're not suicidal, doing this in general can improve your mental health and relationships with other people. If you tend to be depressed, or easily frustrated, or if you tend to take things personally even when you know they aren't intended that way... this shit helps a ton.

I get really bad RSD sometimes from my ADHD. When I hear anything even slightly negative from anyone, or someone doesn't respond to a message of mine right away, or sometimes when someone says something totally innocuous but I'm in a bad mood, it can feel like the world is ending and everyone hates me or no one cares enough about me to bother to think about my feelings and there's no point in even trying. And this shit actually helps with that.

Instead of wrestling with my feelings, knowing it's not about me, knowing I'm overreacting, but feeling awful anyway, I look for a way to twist it into a positive joke about how amazing I am. And it doesn't cure my RSD completely but I have noticed that over time I am getting upset over small things less and less. I am getting into conflict with other people less and less. I am getting angry less and less. People find me more pleasant to be around. And the positive reactions to the ridiculous jokes send me enough signals that people like being around me that I have fewer and fewer attacks of feeling like everyone hates me.

This works, whether you're suicidal, have low self esteem, are depressed, have social anxiety, are neurodivergent, or even just like. Want to try to inject a little more positivity into the world. It sounds cheesy as hell, but start by talking yourself up to a comical degree whenever something goes wrong.

it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.

anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."

just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.

i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.

when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.

but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.

i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?

most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.

now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.

and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.

go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.

[sunflowershepherd]

Species dysphoria hack for the doggies… just refer to everything as ur “doggy/dog/puppy _”

My car? Nah that’s the DOGGY car

My bed? That’s the DOG bed

My phone? That’s the DOG phone

Idk just put that shit in front of everything. Idc what it is, it’s UR DOGGY LIFE BRO!!

Also definitely recommend walking around going “what da dog doin?” Either out loud or in your head when you’re doing stuff. Idk that silly meme is oddly validating for me :3

[therapeutic007]

✨ When Criticism Feels Like a Knife to the Heart: An ADHD RSD Workbook ✨

If you: • Melt down over tiny feedback (even when it’s kindly given) • Dread checking emails/texts in case someone’s upset with you • Remember rejections from 10 years ago like they happened yesterday ...you might be struggling with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)—the emotional earthquake many with ADHD know too well.

This isn’t "being too sensitive"—it’s your nervous system sounding a false alarm that rejection = survival threat.

The RSD & ADHD Workbook helps you:

✔ Spot RSD’s lies ("They hate me" → "I’m interpreting tone") ✔ Short-circuit shame spirals with emergency coping scripts ✔ Respond (not react) to perceived criticism ✔ Rebuild self-trust after social mishaps

📖 Inside you’ll get: → Body-based exercises to calm the RSD adrenaline crash → "Feedback Decoder" prompts to reality-check perceived slights → RSD-proof communication hacks (for work/relationships)

You deserve to feel safe in your own mind—even when others disapprove.

🔗 Find it here

[thebreakfastgenie]

This is not even about tight-lacing. I don’t like to wear anything tight on my ribcage. I’m insanely picky about bras for this reason and I can comfortably wear a sports bra while being active but as soon as I’m still enough to notice it I’m ripping that thing off. I wear bikinis just so I don’t have to wear spandex around my abdomen.

Corsets actually do sound like torture devices to me.

[tommies-stinky-paws]

Re- your question about trans-species.

I obviously can't make a lot of physical changes as I would like to, and I think people get hung up on "surgery" when there isn't much that can currently be done. for me, being trans-species is more about making paradigm changes and pursuing certain life paths/not hiding aspects of non humanity. I'm an alien and basically I'd say my "transition" was about recognizing that aspects of my life are so terribly distressing to me because I'm just not human and then making a choice to change those things to suit being an alien. It felt like getting more serious about actually accommodating being non human.

An example- I don't have a normal circadian rhythm anymore, I hacked it over time by not forcing myself to stay in bed when I inevitably wake at 3 am. I support this with naps when I need them but my kin dysphoria lessened when I saw aspects of human living as societally constructed. It's controversial, which is why I'm on anon, but trans-species can mean a lot of things, but it for me is about making the choice to allow aspects of your kin self to be more physical or be more visible. be that body mods or some other kind of bio hacking.

Some of this, yes, is not good for the body. Like toe-walking for the feeling of digi legs for example. I make sure to stretch after spending time doing something like that. It's all a risk assessment kind of thing.

It's just people think it's about physical ears and tails but it can be about lots of aspects of one's lifestyle.

this answer was actually so fucking perfect, thank you so much, im so sorry it took me so long to respond, i had no idea what to say

i had been ever so slightly questioning if i was perhaps trans-species when id posted my question, thanks to all the answers i got ive come to the conclusion that im not as i dont have the desire to transition into my species. i already am my species :)

thank you, my fantastic alien anon, and thank you to everyone else who responded to my post for all your great answers, and please, by all means, keep sending me stuff!! i wanna learn about yall, ur so cool :)))

[gone-fish-mode]

i do not plan on species transition. i don't like permanent body modifications nor do i have enough dysphoria to justify said modifications . but i think this trend is fun and i will make a list of what i would suggest a hypothetical transitioning gillman to do.

fishskin tattoos (some coloration, but not fully colored)

gill tattoos

transdermal implants to mimic our ridges and bumps (not sure how safe these are but... do be safe)

black sclera contacts (i actually.... want these for myself....)

webbed hand gloves

sharpened teeth (preferably artificial caps over the teeth... dental health is important!)

or: embrace missing or crooked teeth

gloves, sleeves, pants, whatever, that have fabric that mimic fins

OR silicone fin attachments via straps

odorless or natural deodorant (body smell is important but so is personal hygiene)

big fish/raw meat died and lots of raw greens

little clothing, do not be afraid of your body

make lots of noises. whatever your heart desires.

click hum rumble. hack snort spit. make noise

(or none at all)

use your hands to greet more. reach reach reach.

show your teeth

be kind and love everyone around you

[taylor-titmouse]

i know youve said you dont want to focus too much on cadogen's trans-ness before but its my favorite part of him in part because you dont focus too much on it? i rlly like your trans characters (men specifically due to being a gay man but the ladies are cool too!) because they feel like joyful and natural portrayals of trans masculinity in a way thats like, related to their nature as porn characters but not in a fetishistic way. you put a lot of thought and care into how their transness effects the story without shining a big glaring spotlight on how theyre inherently different from the men theyre interacting with. obviously ur life as a trans dude is probably part of that but idk ive read erotica by trans ppl before that doesnt achieve that. maybe its just because All your characters feel realistic. hope this makes sense!

it's probably in part because i barely care about my own transness. i just Am a man. dysphoria doesn't play a real role in my work because it doesn't play a major role in my life; it's not something i feel the need to make work About, more than incidentally anyway.

that and it feels unoriginal to harp on it lmao. "gasp! you're actually a.... woman?" is hack shit. stories where men with different bodies are recognized inherently as men are more interesting to me; just that one change to how people perceive things makes the entire world Different in a way you can unpack into worldbuilding and character dynamics, and on top of it all nobody's reading porn to be reminded it sucks out here for us.

also joyful is such a funny word to use while talking about cadogan because he's such a joyless fuck

[amratlovesjrwi]

dysphoria hack: imagine Exandroth saying all your dysphoria thoughts.

“OURGHHHHH- you will never be a real MAN.”

“You are just CONFUSED, OURGHHHHHHH”

it may not help, but it makes it very, very, funny.

[gremlingirlsmell]

I'm live, playing this now!

Tomorrow (or later this week) I'll stream something a little different than usual:

A "serious, somber" piece about the author's experience with gender dysphoria.

Dysphoria by shovda

[kaiju420]

cw - dysphoria , gender / sex changes ,

gender / sex fuckery , opp of age regression , incest

(under construction)

....is there a fic where sy transmigrates in as sxy right after she dies?

..... where lbg's born into a body with tits and vag?

..... hmm or she transitions?

.... or HE transitions? .

....... sy if you were sxy. IF YOU WERE SXY LBG WOULD BE A MOTHERFUCKER FOR REAL

SHE WOULD NEVER ABORT YOU BINGHE. (SHE) DIDNT EVEN WANT TO IN THE FIRST PLACE BINGHE.

bingge should be reborn

rebirth for transmigration yeah.

oh fuck. if sy does his same 'almost never thinking abt imp stuff from real life chapter fucking closed' shtick and lbg knows its not sxy.

he's 900 years old he knows this isnt what a head disciple from huan hua palace would be like, but having more time to learn to navigate current body would be useful.

he remembers lots of things which could help his cultivation, all he has to do now is track them down once he figures out how to move in a mortal useless baby's body.

(gets suspicious when sy knows what they are too)(who the fuck is this)(finds sy!sxy's reticence in breastfeeding her hilarious, pretends not to be able to eat unless fed)(sy is going through the Horrors tm)(talking himself down but the Horrors)

(i give sy dysphoria bc it fun but lbg? do we make him ignore discomfort in favour of practicality until he cracks?)(sy will repress till the end of time, and she might even be 'eh, shrugs' (till they come across sqh who Did get ray transitioned as well and is fucking Stoked about it)(immediately demands a bodychanging artifact you fucking hack)(lbg squirrells both types away, he/she has come to Realisations)

(sy has not)(does not mind for play bc lbg likes to see him cry and out of his mind with fear sometimes)(but that's mostly it)(he's a dude and he's getting his body back)(and he did!)

anyway lbg of misogyny and comphet sees sy/sqh together (knows sy's a dude) and gets so jealous every time their robes brush that he/she pisses himself so sy has to come back and pay attention to him/her

(lbg is a very very Practical kinda person)

(ill restructure and add more to this later hoho)

[absolutelybatty]

Oof ouch my abdominal wall has been hacked and slashed

No tape under the cut but warning for top dysphoria

Boy, don't bind with duct tape!!!