#elmike breakup

[gayofthefae]

Will first slowly leaves the frame during Mike's speech when he says he isn't scared of El. Because this is what Mike wanted to tell her. "The problem wasn't you". That's the truth he needed her to know regardless of his fear. He then says that he's afraid of her leaving him. We know this to be true because he said it when she wasn't there. He tells her he doesn't know to live without her. Sweet, and no reason not to be true.

But once we get to the story. The "my life started" story. Will inches back onscreen...

Which is odd. It isn't even a change back. Because when he says that he loves her again, Will is once again gone. So it was just for this shot.

Then we return for "I love you on your good days, I love you on your bad days, I love you with your powers, I love you without your powers. I love you for exactly who you are."

But would you look at who's onscreen for the immediately following line "you're my superhero"

They put a one second shot between these to transition it. Not even a reaction shot from El. It's the shot of their hands. And this is only shot Will is in here. It goes straight back after this single sentence.

Will slowly leaves the shot for "I can't lose you" and stays out for the rest of his speech until the final "fight!"

This isn't so much a lie as it is a joint truth. This is not a romantic sentiment. It is showing the entire motivation of Will encouraging Mike in the first place - they are doing this together because they both want to save El in the same way. This is an agreed upon action with an agreed upon goal - one being stated here: "fight".

So what does this tell us about truths:

I love you. Do you hear me? I love you. I'm sorry I don't say it more. It's not because I'm scared of you. I'm not. I've never felt that way. But I am scared that one day, you'll realize you don't need me anymore. And I thought that if I said how I felt, it would somehow make that day hurt more. But the truth is, El, I don't know how to live without you. I feel like my life started that day we found you in the woods, and you were wearing that Benny's Burgers' t-shirt. And it was so big it almost swallowed you whole. And I knew, right then and there, in that moment that I loved you. And I've loved you every day since. I love you on your good days, I love you on your bad days. I love you with your powers, I love you without your powers. I love you for exactly who you are. You're my superhero. And I can't lose you. Do you hear me? I can't lose you. You can do anything. You can fly. You can move mountains. I believe that. But right now, you just have to fight. You have to fight. Fight. Fight!

Everything remaining is Mike's truth and only Mike's truth. He is sorry. He isn't scared of her. He's scared of losing her. He loves her regardless of her powers. He believes in her. He wants her to fight. That is the truth. That first "I love you" is different and he knows it. So even though he repeats the words, that time, it's a lie.

I also note the sentence "said how I felt". Because that's what makes it true. It would not be true if he said "if I told you I loved you". He said "if I said how I felt". And with that, let's put this in a true context. Let's use these truthful lines in the context he wanted to use them in. Let's set the scene:

The last few days, I've had to think about the last talk we had. You know, before the cops and the whole world went to shit and everything. I guess I just, I don't know, I guess I just wanted to say I'm sorry I don't say it more. It's not because I'm scared of you. I'm not. I've never felt that way. I just can't love you the way you want to be loved, but that doesn't mean that I don't. But I'm scared that one day, you'll realize you don't need me anymore. And I thought that if I said how I felt, it would somehow make that day hurt more. But the truth is, El, I don't know how to live without you. I do love you. Every day. I love you on your good days, I love you on your bad days. I love you with your powers, I love you without your powers. I love you for exactly who you are. And I can't lose you. I can't lose you.

I added one line. One line only that changes "won't need me anymore" from a reason to an elaboration. Everything else is the same. Everything else did not need to be changed to fit the other narrative.

As I said recently...something should have contradicted at some point. It didn't.

The consistency of which is truth and not is also supported by what's used when he's begging her to wake up.

Subtle but not total inclusion of Will, who also wants her to wake up, but with focus still on Mike for "come on, come on" (with even a cut back to him)

But when it cuts back to him on the 'I' statement "I know you're in there, Will has been addressed in reaction and is now out of the shot.

Mike and Will in the shot is about both of them, proven by the reaction shot of Will that follows; just Mike is only him, proven by the shift and timing with the "I" statement.

These are also, of course, different enough angles that the camera requires adjustment to capture, so it was important to them, as it also not enough difference to have been more than one camera.

[paladinhearts]

M*leven’s Potential Breakup

If/when M*leven break up, how would you like to see it go down? Me personally, I’d like it if it was initiated by Mike rather than El (it’d likely be mutual but for argument’s sake).

Of course, El initiating the break up would go back to her character arc about becoming independent and finding comfort in being by herself and being self-reliant. However, there’s a reason why I think Mike being the one to end things might be a good direction to go in as well.

Throughout the show, we’ve seen that whenever Mike and El are apart, it’s practically never through Mike’s choice.

S1: El is taken into the Upside Down, she ‘dies’ in front of Mike. He loses her.

S2: El is stopped by Hopper from coming in contact with Mike, they are apart the entire season and Mike can’t reach her. He loses her.

S3: Once again, Hopper forces Mike to be away from El, and then later that season, El dumps him. He loses her.

S4: El has to move away, and for all they know, permanently. Mike was unable to communicate properly with her. Then she gets arrested by the police. And then she’s taken by/goes with the Hawkins Lab people. She doesn’t take him with her. He loses her.

In every season, every separation between these two has been negative. It’s never initiated by Mike. It’s never natural. He’s never given a choice, which is why he feels like he keeps losing her.

We’ve seen that Mike has developed a very negative relationship with the idea of ‘losing’ El. And that’s only natural, considering that every single time he’s apart from her, it was never willingly. He associates time spent away from El with negative events in his life. And because of this exact reason, I believe he’s afraid.

He’s afraid of growing apart from her. He’s scared of the idea of letting go because he knows that every time he’s ‘lost’ her, things always go to shit. He’s not allowing himself to consider the fact that maybe, just maybe, letting go of El might not be the horrible idea he thinks it is.

Currently, they are both holding each other back. In their relationship, El hasn’t felt loved by Mike for a long time now, and Mike will always be the Lois Lane to El’s Superman, which is something he clearly does not want. They are both at a stalemate. And a lot of what I’m saying about Mike applies to El too because they both associate their time apart with negative things.

For El, this has started to slowly change over time. We saw her slowly gaining her confidence in S3, and then by the end of S4, she seems to have come to a conclusion and she seems to have found her independence (read: the last scene in S4). All that’s left now is for Mike to also realise that perhaps growing apart from El and letting her go will actually be a decision for the greater good.

This is why I said I want to see Mike be the one to initiate the breakup. If it’s El that dumps Mike, it’ll once again put him in a position where he feels like he screwed up and lost her, again. But if he’s the one that does it, he’ll realise that this time, he has a choice. He has equal power and an equal say in their relationship. He’s not losing her, he’s willingly letting go. He’s not being forced into this by anyone, there’s nothing that’s trying to take El away from him, this is simply his decision, it’s something he wants to do.

It’ll help him break free from the power imbalance of their relationship, and help him overcome his negative associations with being apart from El. He’ll realise that not all distance has to be a bad thing, and he’ll see the potential in a platonic relationship with El. It’d be a similar arc as his situation with Max, just reversed. With Max, he was afraid of letting her in because he’s never considered being platonically friends with a girl, and with El, it’s the same thing just opposite; he’s afraid of letting her go because he doesn’t realise that just because they’re not dating doesn’t mean he will lose her.

In the past, it’s always been something or someone forcing them apart, so this time, Mike being the one to make the choice would give him back some of that control he so desperately needs in order to repair his self esteem and heal from his trauma.

It’ll help them both grow apart from each other naturally for once, allowing them both to become their own person.

That’s all 🎲

[demadogs]

the mlvn breakup has the potential to be one of the best scenes in the entire show if it coincides with mikes first time coming out to someone and im SICK of people wanting a meaningless breakup in episode one just so you can skip to byler. does heartwarming platonic love and comfort MEAN NOTHING TO YOU?????!!!!

[gayofthefae]

This in combo with an Elmike "friends don't lie so we should be friends"

I need something like "Friends don't lie" "So what are we?" in S5 😭😭

[groovinrightalong]

I don’t know if it’s been done already but?? This song with Mike and El???

Like. Especially from Mike’s point of view, it’s perfect?? I could see him moping in his basement season 3 era blasting this in his headphones or something. Please there could be like the coolest animatic to this, or an edit, anything. Do yall see the vision?

[gayofthefae]

El dreamed of being like Nancy. That's why there are so many St@ncy parallels. She dreamed of being Nancy when she saw her in the photos. Siblings, parents, a girl best friend, a boyfriend. She's gotten all of those. But Nancy's boyfriend didn't work out, if you'll remember. There was trouble with the "I love you"s and they broke up, but it wasn't hostile. They're perfectly civil, even friendly this past season (undertones aside).

She IS a parallel of season 1 Nancy. Sometimes in more ways than we'd like. She's grieving her best friend, she's having relationship troubles.

But she wanted to be a normal teenage girl. Normal teenage girls break up with their boyfriends. That's why it parallels them specifically. Not just because "relationship that ended". Because El always wanted to be Nancy and she's succeeded. The breakup is honestly part of that.

[gayofthefae]

I LOVE THIS OP YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND LIKE I SEE SUCH LITTLE CONSIDERATION OF EL’S INNER MONOLOGUE IN THESE POSTS BESIDES HOW IT RELATES AND REACTS TO MIKE’S.

Also, to add to the Stobin parallels. This makes so much sense, I see SO many parallels between El and Robin’s facial journeys in reaction to the speeches down to how MISCONSTRUED they are on a first watch. As a boy they love tell them he is in love with them when that is not how they feel it, they sink and feel nervous and pained at the idea of now having to crush this person they love.

(But a reminder that Steve actually took it very well)

I have another take on the monologue. Walk with me.

And I’m not saying that my interpretation is the correct one, but rather, I’d like to look at it from ankther angle and consider another possibility.

With the script coming out and the monologue recieving all of this renewed attention, I’m starting to think that maybe El did believe Mike’s monologue.

And this isn’t just me looking at the script as proof. And while yes, the script did say that she believed it, you can’t take what’s on the page as cold hard proof versus what is on the screen, BUT I do think that what we do see on screen supports this idea.

Oh, I still think that Mike was lying out of his ass, and many have already elaborated on that idea so I don’t really want to rehash it here. We as the audience know that Mike is lying because we get a much clearer view of everything, but El does not get that view. We heard Mike say in the van that meeting her was just dumb luck, El did not.

While we also know that Mike’s reasoning for not saying “I love you” comes from his internal struggles, El’s belief as to why Mike couldn’t say comes from her own inner turmoil. She believed that Mike couldn’t say it because she saw herself as a monster. She has no idea about Mike’s personal struggles and doesn’t really consider it a possibility just because she is too in her head. I elaborate more in this post about El’s dichotomous thinking and how it drives her in this season.

It might be different if, say, El questioned Mike if there was someone else, that would definitely send a different message. But this isn’t El believing that Mike is love with someone else. This is El believing that she is unlovable.

But if she did believe him, shouldn’t she have looked happy? Wouldn’t she be closer with him and not giving him the cold shoulder? Wouldn’t they have a conversation after to reconcile their feelings?

And I agree. This is not the face of someone who is happy to finally hear “I love you” from her boyfriend.

But it’s not because she didn’t believe him. It’s because she realized it’s not what she wants to hear because she is not in love with him.

I talked about it more in this post where I discuss some Elmike and Stobin parallels. Here’s the main point I want to draw attention to:

I don’t think El is intentionally lieing about her feelings. I think she felt this hole ever since Hopper left, and believed that Mike’s love was supposed to fix everything. That Mike’s love is what she wants to hear. And then she finally hears it, and realizes it’s not what she wants. So maybe the face she is making during the monologue isn’t out of dissapointment, maybe it’s out of realization and guilt.

This would be a perfect parallel to the end of season 3, which I talk about here—

—and I pretty much agree with everything I said before.

And think about it, if El did believe what Mike was saying, that would make this line—

—so much worse than it already was.

Maybe El believed Mike in that moment, and maybe it did give her enough strength to break free of Vecna’s grasp, but the important thing is that she fails.

And what does El’s dichotomous thinking tell us about how she’s thinking afterward? If she’s not a superhero, then she must be a monster. She got her powers back, her boyfriend loves her, and yet she’s still a monster. Everything that she believed would solve her problems, didn’t. So what can she now?

I think when El side eyes Mike in the cabin it can be read through this lens of guilt as well. How can she bring herself to tell the guy that fell madly in love with her at first sight, that she doesn’t feel the same way? Especially when this guy sees her as a superhero, the thing that El wants her to be? Would breaking up mean losing the superhero title along with the girlfriend title?

I guess I like this interpretation because it shifts the focus to both Mike and El’s internal conflicts, rather than placing their relationship faults on the other person. Mike isn’t a nerd who is hopelessly in love with someone who is disinterested because she is way cooler than him, and El isn’t hopelessly in love with a gay guy who can’t love her back (even though he is a gay guy imo). They are both not in love with each other, and it has nothing to do with the other person.

And what great irony would that be if they were in the exact same position. They both believed that what they wanted from the other person was their love, and it wasn’t until they got it when that cold hard truth would hit them across the face. Now they are in this awkward position where they believe the other person is in love with them, and they both care too much to actually break the truth to the other person. It’s perfect.

[noodlesbatches]

imagine this with me, (btw this would be after elmike’s neutral breakup <3)

“I have something to show u and its kinda important to me” he seems nervious as he pulls out a letter from his pocket that says on the front

Will.

El opens it and reads it at the ends of the page she sees

Love, Mike

she looks up and smiles at him “You should show him, Mike.”

She knows, but of course Mike doesn’t know that.

[gayofthefae]

Actually now this post is making me think again that maybe El does break up with him and it frees him to take action and that's inciting incident. Because what could possibly bring THIS person, who has not changed that much from the person he will be in season 5, to leave her. Ever.

(That also would make the build to doing something for himself because entirely centered around Will no personal action yet)

He might break up with her. Might.

But after seeing her like that? On the table dying like that?

He would never even dare to think it.

if you think about it, because mike is under the impression el needs him and always will, the moment mike tells el he loves her, that's him deciding to stay in the closet for the rest of his life. that's him deciding to live the rest of his life in this lie just so he won't lose her again. he's willing to do anything and everything if it meant not reliving his trauma over again. that's him willing to stay in an unhappy relationship for the rest of his life just like his parents just to make sure the one thing that gives him some sort of normalcy and his existence a purpose doesn't leave him again.

[bulionzkury]

"We're gonna see byler kiss in a few months!"

Yes, but you know what else where gonna see in a few months?

MILEVEN BREAKUP

They're finally gonna be happy, we'll see (i hope) platonic elmike and Mike&El being comfortable with each other

[miwiheroes]

Hi welcome to miwiheroes <3

MY BYLER SLIDES

*australian accent* 'Ello this is Eli, president of miwiheroes club and I realised I never made an intro post, also this is a little masterpost where you can find all the analysis/ byler rambling posts without having to scrolls through my account :D

I'm 19 years old

At university for psychology

he/him

I may look like an aggressively straight man but no one knows i'm actually hyperfixated on shipping two queer guys from a sci-fi netflix show

I'm a capricorn, infp, bisexual and trans ftm

my hyperfixations right now include byler, the elder scrolls (oblivion), link click, aot, the magnus archives and dan & phil <3

i'm from england

my spotify is 'figflower' and: Here are my byler playlists!!

i never used to write analysis on film but thx byler tumblr because i've been missing out

if you were wondering, my favourite characters from stranger things are (in this order): will, mike, hopper and el <3 okay see ya

MY ANALYSES:

(i will update these as i make them. my more massive analyses are highlighted in blue)

ANALYSES I'M MOST PROUD OF:

El's arc of her desire for a normal childhood - "Pretty"

Mike displaces his anger at himself onto others

A little ST5 theory

This theoretical model of relationships + ST couples

Mike and Will and El cannot be replaced by a different gender - they are tied to a queer narrative

All my Airport Scene Analyses

Blue and Yellow theory is completely canon

Will is not getting a new love interest in S5

Season 3 ending scene full analysis

Mike and the theme of promises

OTHER:

We have been heterobaited far more than queerbaited

Insane Loverslakegate proof

Mike's treatment of El's powers vs. Will's powers

The difference between Byler's interruption trope and Mileven's

Common Romantic Tropes used with Byler

The D&D Substitute scene is Mike questioning his sexuality

Byler + Reciprocal Looks of Love

The existence of a Love Triangle proves Byler endgame

The Painting Lie is Chekhov's Gun

'The Will Voice' isn't a thing Bylers made up

The original S3 ending script reveals inner thoughts

Mike's lack of attraction to women other than El

Purposeful blocking analysis

Purposeful music choices and music titles

Will's understanding of Mike makes the audience root for Byler

Mike has to be wrong about needing to love El

Elmike breakup vs Byler fight contrast

Phonegate canon or not canon? analysis

Mike's bedroom detailed analysis

How Mike treats El's letters vs. Will's art

Mike's conversation with El in the grocery store is queer coded

Byler parallels with other canon ships

Answering a mileven ask part 2: electric boogaloo

Answering a mileven ask part 1

Mike's self-sabotaging avoidance to incriminate himself

Silly queer coding jokes

The M&M Scene

Will's 'I'm not gonna fall in love' is a bigger proof than you think

Confirmation that Mike jumping into the quarry was about Will

Milkvan's conflict, Byler, and the concept of understanding

Byler and the insane amount of Closet Imagery

Season 1 Mike is extremely queer-coded

What if Mike's gay from the beginning of S5 like Will in S4?

You're not delusional: What I noticed when I wasn't a byler

Thinking about the monologue…

Mike is clearly thinking about Will in the Snow Ball scene

Light is symbolic for truth = byler endgame

MY FICS:

My AO3 Account: miwiheroes

vibrant days (caution to the breeze) - 15,204 words

Mike and Will's relationship has been secret for 2 months. Neither of them want to bring it up, but things build and build until it becomes more of a burden than just a little mutual understanding. Will's growing up (and getting drunk) and it's impossible for Mike to stay in the same place forever, with words always on the tip of his tongue.

aka mike and will are hiding their relationship and avoid talking about hard subjects

is my timing that flawed? - 14,621 words

In the aftermath of a harrowing escape from the Upside Down, Mike and Will grapple with physical and emotional wounds. Faced with Will's new plan and doubt of what's real and what's not, Mike must confront reality and something that he had never been able to truly control.

aka wound cleaning fic + a devastating cliffhanger + Will not knowing what's real and what's not

it's rotten work (not to me. not if it's you) - 15,919 words

Ten years after everything, and Will hasn't been able to shake a debilitating fear of anything medical-related. So when the only option and smart thing to do is get a blood test from the hospital, Mike is sure to take the time to be there for him.

aka will needs a blood test but has a phobia of needles and mike takes time off work to support him

what you really want - 46,456 words

aka a s5 speculatory mike wheeler-centric fic about his internalised homophobia and a lot of moments where he's not so clever about his feelings with will

our hearts were singing - 13,724 words (dnf)

aka karen invites mike and will over for christmas, but mike still hasn't told his whole family about his relationship, even after a year of them definitely not-so-platonically living together. maybe it's time.

you can't help but become the sun - 16,267 words

aka mike offers to be will's reference, they talk about mike's self-esteem issues, and more shenanigans with paint ensue

stay with me a while - 9,515 words

aka mike confessed to will to save the world, but will wasn't conscious enough to say it back. when he wakes the next morning, they have a lot to talk about.

life used to be so hard - 5,697 words (incomplete)

A collection of drabbles and short one-shots that tell a non-chronological story about Mike and Will's life after the UD. Stay tuned to put the pieces together and figure out a full story <3 Further explanation is in the notes of the first instalment.

the boy with the thorn in his side - 53,566 words

aka mike figures out his sexuality in the worst way possible, but as always, will is there to help. in more ways than one.

how could i be blind to it? - 16,082 words

aka holly's missing, and her friends are determined to find her and bring her home. one person in her friend group in particular is more passionate than the others about finding her, and soon mike finds out why that is. and why he felt so different about will to his other friends when he was a kid.

answers you seek will never be found at home - 12,325 words (incomplete)

aka mike begs will to escape their small town after too many run-ins with homophobic small-town bs. he knows will's meant to find himself elsewhere, but he never expects to find an answer to the age-old question of his own fate. prom, gay bars, sleazy hotels, train stations, two lesbians and their not-so-legal marriage - they aren't the traditional sources of wisdom, but he can't complain.

MY BYLER EDIT COMP ON YOUTUBE

Have fun! And if you don't ship byler ur allowed to interact but if you want to hate on it, please don't interact! I'll just delete any hate because I personally think there is no space for homophobia or negativity on my page.

You'll also find 0 byler doubt here. I don't want to worry people. So ily <3

[lunabug2004]

just remembered the elmike rooftop leak and all the breakup (or post-breakup) vibes it was giving omg byler is so endgame

[paladin1985]

my evil twisted nowmemories just told me they gonna save time by skipping over mildvan breakup completely cause its more productive for platonic elmike to be established when they go into mikes inner turmoil of confronting will abt the painting.. then when mike comes out its beautiful and they all sing

[justcameheretobyler]

I’ve been reflecting on Eleven and Mike’s fight in Season 4, and I feel like Mike doesn’t get the justice he deserves in that scene. Most people focus on his defensive side, which is fair, but it misses the complexity of his character.

First, let’s talk about Eleven.

El and Mike’s bond is incredibly special. He was the first person to offer her a warm place to stay and give her comfortable clothes—clothes he wore in the first scene of the show btw. Mike became a pillar in El’s life. Does she need him to survive? No. But she loves him deeply, just like she loves Hopper. Both gave her a home when they didn’t have to.

When Mike found Eleven, he had no idea she had powers. He stood up to Dustin and Lucas to keep her safe, showing how much he cared about her as a person. Even the lines people criticize him for—like calling her a "weapon"—weren’t meant to dehumanize her. Mike was just trying to convince Lucas to let her stay with the party. He’s always been tender with El, promising her they’d meet again when she rang the doorbell.

But let’s focus on the fight scene.

El had just lost her powers—the one thing that made her feel safe and in control. Mike had warned her this might happen, but the loss left her vulnerable. Without her powers, she reverted to the little girl who was bullied in the lab. This explains why she let Angela bully her, even though El is normally confrontational. She was scared of being different and wanted desperately to fit in. She also let Mike lie to her because she didn’t want to lose more than she already had. Deep down, she suspected Mike didn’t love her the way she wanted him to, but she couldn’t face it.

So, El lied to Mike, just as Mike was lying to her. They both clung to a "safe path," pretending everything was okay when it wasn’t. When El told Mike he was scared of her, she was really projecting her own fear—her fear of herself. She didn’t want to confront the possibility that she was the monster in her broken memories. Blaming Mike was easier. That fight became a turning point for her, forcing her to confront the “I love you” issue and begin facing her own fears.

Now, let’s talk about Mike.

Mike was unhappy and anxious, but he didn’t fully understand why. He had mixed feelings about himself—and about Will—but he likely suppressed them because they didn’t feel "right" or "normal." He clung to the idea of being the boyfriend of his “superhero girlfriend” because it seemed like the path he should take. Plus, Mike has always felt responsible for El’s happiness. From the moment he took her in, he probably felt like he had to protect her, and since he knew El loved him, he assumed it was natural to love her back.

He should love her.

But he doesn’t

And he can’t say it.

That’s what makes their fight so uncomfortable and lacking intimacy. Something is broken—not just between them, but within each of them. They were both pretending to belong to something normal, and it didn’t work. They couldn’t face their truths, so they stayed stuck.

By the end of Season 4, though, things seem to shift. El realizes she’s not a monster, and Mike starts to accept his own feelings—at least a little. It’s hard to say what will happen in Season 5, but I think it would be strange if they stayed together. A breakup and an honest conversation would be so much better for both of them.

Even before I started shipping Byler, I didn’t think ElMike was my cup of tea couple. It’s just not my relationship goal. Byler, on the other hand, works because of how they accept their mistakes and apologize to each other almost immediately (in their own way).

So, I hope these three people can have their own happy ending.

I'll keep our tags cuz I like this side of tumblr.

[gayofthefae]

I think I thought this too and thought he just couldn't get to her or at worst she didn't see him but on my second watch I remember reading the subtext "I don't need your comfort. You don't even love me." Everything is crashing down on her at the same time in this moment I think. And it does so more when she gets more "proof" later with his reaction to Angela but it is right now, too. She can pretend they're relationship is good and secure but she is not feeling good about being vulnerable with him right now because she doesn't trust that his compassion is real, and even so, being close to him may just serve as a reminder of the stress she's associating with him right now.

And that goes along with the lie thing. She doesn't trust him to love her the way she needs right now so she doesn't want to be reminded/confirmed that he can't and she is still, as she has been out of insecurity all day, trying to make the day about "me and you" and ignoring Will in a desperate attempt to CONVINCE him to love her. She isn't actively ignoring Will like Mike is, she just can't afford to focus on anything but giving Mike the perfect day. The perfect day a perfect girlfriend would give him. The kind of girlfriend a person loves.

And yeah, the simplest easiest way to resolve tension in a relationship like this? *Gasp* don't write in the first place! Need a plot conflict for the couple? Make it situational! (S4 Lumax) Systemic! (S3 Jancy) Projecting you past problems! (S3 Jopper). Don't make the couple have problems that come FROM the couple. The whole point is to romanticize it and say that they SOLVE everything together and BY being together. The tension is when they're apart and being together resolves it. If it is ever demonstrated that they are relaxed apart and, because of their conflict, BECOME stressed when together, we will not want them together. At worst, they should be the same apart and together and not be improved by each other. But, out of love and wanting to work things out, THEY ADD STRESS TO EACH OTHER'S LIVES. ESPECIALLY in season 4! Like I said, it's why she doesn't want to see Mike! It would be overwhelming and piling onto her current stress!

Mike and El consistently become more stressed when they're together. They love each other and have good moments in their dating but all of their conflicts are 2 steps back, 2 steps forward aka their relationship itself stresses them out and they fight all season to get to a place where they can be happy together. Sweet, telling of love, love is work, but love shouldn't be THAT much work. And being happy together is the bare minimum. They have not surpassed the bare minimum because they can't even maintain it consistently.

They have said repeatedly now "being together equals stress but when they overcome it, they're okay. Not being together inherently equals being okay."

If they wanted us to think something different they would have shown us El not doing okay as a result of her separation from Mike during season 4 even ONCE. They even managed to bring up Max even though that plotline was almost entirely flashbacks. They mentioned Max to give the reunion more satisfaction. They even showed El thinking of Will as she referenced the mind flayer to Papa. But nothing for Mike. (And Jonathan, she loves you too).

There is so much they COULD have done and didn't. But more importantly, there is SO much they could have NOT done and DID.

the first time i saw this, when i was NOT a byler shipper, i thought el was running TO mike. i thought we were getting a sweet moment where el runs to mike and he puts an arm around her or hugs her.

then i realized she was running away from him. 

and i was like, why?? they're supposed to be the couple why does she not want his comfort??

and even after will calls her out on doing mike wrong by lying to him, even after she sees that mike is attempting to talk to her and comfort her, that he's not angry at her, she still tells angela to lie to mike. more lies. that's how much she cares about keeping up the persona. had angela lied to mike, el would've continued lying to him the entire week. something she knows in her heart is wrong and not fair to mike.

this is a theme in s4. putting who you want to be seen as before being honest with your bf/gf. going above and beyond to preserve your lie, to be seen as who you want to be.

chrissy does that with jason. who she portrays herself as is completely different than who she really is and what she's really going through. jason has absolutely no idea chrissy is struggling and refused to believe chrissy would buy drugs, because chrissy didn't want to tell him. who knows how jason would've reacted if chrissy was honest, we don't know because chrissy didn't trust him enough to tell him. that's not love at all, that's sad.

this is a point in s2 as well. murray calls nancy out for being afraid to be her true self, and she stays with steve because she doesn't have to be her true self around him. she is her true self when she's with jonathan, and that's why they worked together. that's love.

the exact same thing happens with chrissy. the first time we see her genuinely smile is when she's with eddie. she's sweet and charismatic, and had she lived she totally would've gone to eddie's show, something you never would've expected from her, something her boyfriend, the person she pretends to love, would NEVER do.

robin and steve reinforce this too

you fall in love with the person who makes you feel accepted, the person who makes you feel like you can be who you are. the person you trust with your true self.

mike and el don't trust each other enough, they don't understand each other well enough.

they would have to change their behavior towards each other by leaps and bounds, and we're already at the last season. there is no time for that. stranger things isn't a multi season show about the complexity of romantic relationships and the healthy way to resolve problems. there is no time for that in just about any movie or show, especially a sci-fi show. you know what's way easier and way more likable? pairing your character with someone they naturally click with, who bring out the best in each other and for some reason can't help but be their authentic selves when they're with each other.

did it with jancy, like i said earlier

did it with lumax. when lucas and max talked on the bus max found herself spewing about things she'd never even said out loud before, and she had to stop herself. something about lucas just made her feel comfortable, like she could be herself and tell the truth. she trusted him.

"You're nothing like your brother, okay? You're cool and different, you're super smart, and you're like, totally tubular."

jopper too! joyce constantly had to hide things from bob, she was insecure about their family not being normal.

"This is not a normal family."

"It could be."

though bob had good intentions, the message of the show is not trying to be normal when you aren't. whatever it is about you that makes you weird or different, whatever you've been through that changed you, stay true to it. dont bottle it up and try to be someone else. all of vecnas victims in s4 were doing this, and it didn't end well for them.

they even did it with dustin and suzie. dustin constantly tries to impress max with his teeth, then in season 3 he says suzie thinks kissing is better without teeth. he doesn't have to be insecure about that or try to impress her. she likes him for him.

mike isn't comfortable being his true self around el either. he's insecure about his interests, he feels like he has to act older and cooler to impress her.

you shouldn't be with the person you feel you have to impress. you should be with the person who relieves that pressure, who makes you feel like being the authentic you is enough.

jonathan and nancy, lucas and max, joyce and hopper, dustin and suzie,

cough WILL AND MIKE cough...

[carmenilla]

incoming anti-milkvan rant but pro-elmike rant (and some byler mixed in there because you know me)

my rants aren’t very organized so i apologize :,)

mike and el haven’t been together since like the first season, and their relationship has been descending since then.

the most they’ve spent by each other’s side was in season three, and even then they were in a group setting like the whole time and it wasn’t them, together. also we’ve all seen the season three blocking. they are almost never next to each other

with will it’s the opposite. mike and will spent no time together in season 1, but spent 90% of the time together in both season 2 and season 4 (el was barely with mike in either of these seasons) and while season three had them be less of a pair, once again, the season three blocking comes in clutch and makes sure to pair mike with will in every group setting

they even spent the end of season 4 together. even after mike confessed his “love” for el. el and mike aren’t talking, they aren’t with each other, they’re not even paired together in the blocking of the final shot. (we all know who is, though.

when are mike and el ever together since they’ve been dating, excluding scenes that further the deterioration of their relationship? they’re barely together at all.

el continuously has a plot/subplot of coming into her own. being independent. not being defined by papa, or her dad, or mike (as max says in season three). obviously she wants to have a family and loved ones. she deserves to have that. she does have that - but that’s not going to be taken away or lessened by her standing on her own two legs without anyone else telling her how they want her to do so

all of this has been leading to a milkvan breakup. it’s been built up for multiple seasons now. they’ve laid the ground work. mike and el were best together and understood each other the most when they were friends.

notice how i didn’t say “just friends” - romantic relationships are not actually any stronger than friendship. just different. in fact, friendship is stronger, and while romance can heighten that (like with other pairings in the show) sometimes it just doesn’t (like with mike and el).

mike and el haven’t been friends for a while. like how people say “just friends”, they’re just dating. they’ve been doing this since they were so young and they’re still so young and they don’t understand the importance of the friendship aspect of romantic relationships. they only understand what girlfriend and boyfriend are supposed to do, and they can’t even try to do that without it all falling apart.

they need to be friends again. their relationship would be so much stronger. i miss their friendship. they were so sweet and so understanding and so good together when they were actually friends. a lot of couples are both friends and dating, especially in stranger things - look at lumax, my favorite example of this and why i love them so much. but mike and el aren’t. and they should be. they were best when they were

i fucking love elmike and there’s no chance of me getting them back if they keep trying to date each other “correctly” instead of, i don’t know, trying to be friends again. making genuine connections with each other. being true to the nature of their relationship. they are such friends, and maybe if they were friends and dating it would work out, but they’re not and it’s clear they’re not going to be. so if it’s one or the other, they should pick friends. they are amazing together as friends. they were always best as friends.

and then when we flip over to the byler side of things. mike and will have had a long time being friends. they’ve been friends, best friends, since kindergarten. in season 5, they’ll be in junior year, and they will have been best friends for ten years. they’ve had time to have their relationship develop, unlike mike and eleven. they are so clearly very good to each other and with each other as friends - but there is something grating on their relationship and friendship recently. something bubbling beneath the surface, making smooth sailing not so smooth.

yes, this is a metaphor for homosexuality. homosexuality is banging on their door. these bitches GAY. and it’s straining their friendship. they’re still friends, obviously, and they still want to be, but by ignoring this whole other piece of their relationship, they start fighting and misunderstanding each other for the first time in the history of their friendship. something clearly needs to change here.

when byler does become canon, there is zero doubt in my mind that they will still also be friends. that is the backbone and most important part of their relationship, and that is why their relationship will work. and that’s also 80% of the reason why i ship them, especially over milkvan, who just aren’t friends anymore like they were in s1.

something needs to change here in both mike and el’s relationship and mike and will’s. something that will benefit all these characters individually and their relationships. something that the creators have been laying the groundwork for for multiple seasons now. and i cannot wait to watch it happen. i love all three of these characters so much and i need them to get their happy ending