#gotta traumatize them for plot

[your-ne1ghbor]

Asha design reference I think idk (TKORAT AU)

She kinda reminds me of young Amaya unironically lol

(probably bc Amaya gave Asha her old clothes 💀💀💀)

(Or that I was playing with my style again for the millionth time)

I FORGOT HER FUCKING FRECKLES NOOOOOOOOO

Also been thinking about changing her sidekick animal to smth different but idk what tbh 🐀

HEheh ofc I had to draw silly angst and moment together

For her dress, Im not even done with it. I wanna add patterns that represents her and the kingdom but idk how to execute it outfit wise atm. Plus, I wanna fix some problems I have with the dress, mainly the middle and top part as well since it really reminds me of FS! Asha and I dont really want that and wasn't trying to go for that 😭

The hair was pretty fun ngl. I got to see a ton of styles in box braids and they're all really pretty :D. I simply went for the pulled back box braids since I thought it fit her well design wise.

The crown was the easiest. I was just simply looking at crowns from medieval times and I kinda got reminded of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, And the Wardrobe. Specifically the ending where the kids got their crowns.

I felt like it just fit her design wise. But that probs just me being a sucker for flower crowns right now smh 🤦‍♀️

Going back to the dress, I was heavily looking up Spain Outfits from medieval times including some other ones, like the French outfits for example, mainly as inspriation for the outfit so I can come up with my own design of a dress for Asha :D

The rest of the dress kinda came from my pencil, I was just sketching until the design looked right to me and then was like: YES haha

I did look at her early concept version's of Asha as well, but it was only for her hair, since it is always the hair I have trouble with

(plus this is one of my fav styles I see Asha in from the art book lol)

Idk if this will be her ACTUAL FINAL design, but ig it is a part of the process of my overthinking :')

Annnnnndddd ofc thinking how I am gonna traumatize her in her childhood. Hell yeah...

...

:(

[team-118]

yknow what fuck it. I think chris should be in the car when eddie crashes into a tree. I think the surface level loose ends should be tied up - helena and ramon and their place in chris's life, chris asked to come home, whatever, we're leaving texas with an air of finality and slight apprehension.

and then we hit them with a fucking car. (or a tree I am not picky.)

all of a sudden it's too late for "I'll explain when he's older." all of a sudden there's no point to the patented diaz family cold shoulder. you two are on your way back to a home you've never fully defined and then you're not moving an inch. suddenly you're realizing there's actually a whole lot you've left unsaid and you better get it out now. don't even get me started on the shannon parallels... eddie and chris are figuring out how to be a team again (they never lost it), gavin mchugh is acting his pants off, eddie is fighting to get back home to his family. then we're home safe and irrevocably changed and what happens now?

[silent-scribbs]

Working on my au to realize I rlly do need to fully design/redesign everyone

And outfits

Theres

So, SO many different ways to draw everyone… ouchie </3

[alpaca-clouds]

Some historical context for Olrox

Okay, let me prephase this with one important message: Castlevania Nocturne made me really happy by making the plot all about colonialism, as colonialism and its fallout and how it influences us to this day is a topic that I am very passionate about. We do not talk enough about it. The US does not talk enough about it because it could make white people feel uncomfortable. And here in Germany we do not talk about it, because we act as if this had nothing to do with us at all.

But the show talks about it and I love it.

And I honestly also gotta say that I love that the BI_PoC character have a concrete cultural heritage. Olrox is Aztec, Annette is Yoruba, and Drolta is Egyptian. Other shows: Please take notes!

But let's talk Olrox, because he is so fucking interesting and amazing!

We know about him that he is Aztec and also that he is 250 years old. Or roughly that old by the time he kills Julia. Which would put either his birth or his turning somewhere around 1530.

Now, the fall of the Aztec Empire has a very exact date: August 13th, 1521. But you should keep in mind that this does not mean that on that day the Aztec's are extinct. To this day there is still 1,5 million people speaking Nahuatl, the language of the Aztecs, and preserving some of the Aztec cultural traditions. It was just that on that day the empire construct fell to Cortez and the Spaniad conquistadors and a lot of Aztecs went into exile to flee the genocide that Cortez was bringing upon them.

The question of course is: Was Olrox still human at this time or was he already a vampire? From his dialogue it is clear that he was at least alive and grown enough to remember the fall of the empire and the distruction Cortez and his men brought upon them. But you can bet it was very traumatic.

I also am assuming he was turned by a white man. Because so far my assumption is that vampirism is an old world thing that got brought to the new world through colonialism. (Mostly because in Dracula's court we do not see any new world vampires.)

Now, the other interesting thing is what he says about his dead lover. The one Julia killed. So, first the "town in Massachusetts" he speaks about is clearly Stockbridge. Which was the town in which many Mohicans have settled during the colonial times, as well as other people from the Iroquois Nations. Now, it should be noted that the Mohicans were not part of the Iroquois alliance and in fact went to war with the Iroquois, but by the time colonialism really geared up there was some cooperation between the Mohicans and Iroquois.

Due to this they were in an alliance with the Oneida (who were part of the Iroquois) by the time of the Revolutionary war. Now, the Revolutionary War created a lot of conflict between the Iroquois nations, because they did not agree which side they should fight on. Of course both sides promised that they could keep their land, but the Mohawk, Onondaga, Cayuga, and Seneca did not trust the colonists and hence sided with the British, while the Oneida and Tuscarora (and through them also the Mohicans) sided with the Colonists.

And the dead lover clearly was among those siding with the colonists. Now, a quick refresher for the non-Americans (and the Americans who slept to history class, which is understandable). The Revolutionary War lasted from April 19, 1775 to September 3, 1783 (which, yes, also means that Julia and Richter probably were in the US during the war the entire time and the "evil" Julia was fighting probably was linked to it). And of course we all know how it ended for the Indigenous people: The colonists won, countless Indigenous folks died on both sides, only to get booted of their land soon after. The Oneida und Mohicans were made to move westwards not soon after the war ended. So, yes, Olrox would have seen that happen.

Now, an interesting thing in his dialogue was when Erzebet said: "We will create a new world." To which he replies: "I have heard that one before." And she says: "This time we are going to make it to last."

And the big question is to what this is refering. Is it refering to the colonialization or is it refering to the revolutionary war? Or something entirely different. In both cases it would be possible. And yes, the American Revolution definitely were claiming to create a new world. But was it that what he refered to or something else?

Well, never the less: Interesting character. Really good writing.

[jackass-jones]

I’m getting kinda feral about Ryuki today so I wanna bring up something else

Since the entire Ryuki side of the story is pretty much just everything he tells Mizuki about what happened 6 years ago, this begs the question: is his summary including the parts that are from the future, or is this just a writing error?

It’d make sense if it was just an error like. First off if Ryuki could see the future that’d be a whole mess, plus the future he’s seeing here isn’t even in the right timeline, it’s all what happens on the B side. Plus, the whole twist of not knowing what the proper timeline is is already a pretty iffy twist because it’s only a twist to the player, not to the characters. Since it’s kinda flimsy to begin with, I can see how the writers could’ve just completely fucking forgotten to fix the Ryuki side to make sense with this twist. They kinda forgot about Ryuki a lot in the second half of the game after all and a lot of the writing around him is messy as hell so I can believe it

But, let’s pretend this all WAS intentional, that Ryuki DID include information about the future in his story to Mizuki. This would go perfectly with the idea that Ryuki is a frayer and that he’s being haunted by knowledge from the past and future and is incapable of distinguishing the two. It’s already true that Ryuki has trouble telling what year it is (during the practice launch on the Mizuki side we see Ryuki in a trance waiting for Shoma to get off the ferris wheel even though that’s an event that happened 6 years ago, Ryuki makes constant references to Date being disappointed in him,etc) so it’d make sense if he got his wires majorly crossed when telling Mizuki what he remembers about the case from 6 years ago. If this is the case, then Ryuki’s powers can extend across not just past and future, but also multiple timelines

It’s not like Ryuki is the only one with this power. Date remembers when he was hospitalized in the Mizuki route during the true ending and gets confused about why he’s remembering things that never happened. Mizuki is able to remember Jin being referred to as the almighty despite her not hearing about it in that timeline. But it is interesting that Ryuki is the only one who seems to be plagued by his knowledge. The other two protagonists will be just kinda weirded out by their ability to know things that didn’t happen, but they recover pretty quickly. Ryuki though, he doesn’t know what timeline he’s in and he’s constantly speaking and thinking in riddles and drowning himself in liquor to forget everything and is only able to function in the A side BECAUSE the somnium failed and he wasn’t able to remember tearer’s true identity

Basically Ryuki cursed with evil timeline powers and it makes me wonder if he’s an unreliable narrator on purpose or on accident and honestly, I don’t know if I wanna know

Had an epiphany last night and I haven’t seen anyone talk about this (maybe because it could be just so obvious no one felt the need to but shhh) but look here at the veeeery beginning of the aini flowchart

We got the Ryuki somnium as the first split and as we know, this split happens based on whether or not you (or ryuki in this case) know the name of Tearer. You can only get the Mizuki side of the story if you have played the Ryuki side and have heard Tearer’s name. The somnium will also be much more complex and dangerous

So essentially on the B side, the psync is unsuccessful. Mizuki doesn’t really help Ryuki, and she barely learns anything about the hb case. Ryuki is left in the same mentally unstable state he was before, and he can’t hold a conversation without babbling and laughing maniacally. This leaves Mizuki to do her investigation without any of the past help at all, which is how the true route of the story is supposed to go

This isn’t anything new, we know this. What I do wanna revisit is the A side, where Ryuki doesn’t remember Tearer. The psync is actually successful and the results are significantly different than the B side. Ryuki sobers up and is able to tell Mizuki everything that happened to him 6 years ago. So basically the Ryuki route (the parts from 6 years ago) is everything that he’s telling to Mizuki

This means that there’s a whole separate version of the story in this timeline where Mizuki learns everything about the past, including what happened to Date. And what’s getting me feral about this is. How did the investigation proceed afterwards??? Did the two of them work together to finish the case? Did Mizuki get a chance to mourn Date? Did she lash out at Ryuki? Did Ryuki even mention his involvement with Tearer or Bibi’s existence at all? How would everything had changed if they worked together?

IM GOING INSANE I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THE A SIDE TIMELINE DAMMIT-

[moviecritc]

✦ ˚ : · SHE GOT AWAY, SHE'S GOT A WAY ⋆ ALEXANDRA SAINT MLEUX, CHARLES LECLERC 🦢

pairing ☆ charles leclerc x singer! reader x alexandra saint mleux

summary ☆ you and alex broke up because she suggested charles to join your relationship, and you're really mad about it

warnings ☆ hate comments (mostly for alex, but it's just for the plot), smau

a/n ☆ got some of the ideas for anons ask, so thank you so much darlings <3

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

masterlist | letterboxd

tags; @iamred-iamyellow @f1ln4dr3cl16mv33 @changetyre @ilovechickenwings @callsignwidow @inejghafawifesblog @formulaal @niyu2208 @ilivbullyingjeongin @magnummagnussen @astmclaren455 @sp1rl @only-nope @eyerollerr @styl1shl1v @ironspdy

yourusername just posted!

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yourusername no need to be hateful in your fake gucci sweater !! Amazing crowd this night 🥵

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user1 SHE'S NEVER GONNA STOP OR WHAT

user4 i love her for that honestly

user2 only woman ever existed

user3 'yes y/n' we say all in unision

user5 oh she's still mad

user6 🧎🏾🧎🏾🧎🏾

reneerapp hold up i'm trying to spell gorjus

user7 SHE'S HERE AGAIN user8 pls just collab, you'll save lives

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yourusername she('s) got (a)way 👽🖤🥀🗽🪽

'SUBWAY' out tomorrow with a supercool mv written and directed by me (who?) and starring the beautiful Abigail Morris from @/thelastdinnerparty and me :))

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user9 sometimes all you gotta do to heal is cause international chaos, shade them to death, release a cool song about not moving on, cast a hot indie singer and then got away

user10 seeing y/n walk barefoot around new york was not on my bingo card

user11 nothing that happened in this last months was on my bing card

thelastdinnerparty It was a dream take part in this project 🖤

yourusername 🖤🖤 user12 THE HEART user13 SHUT UP

reneerapp ok i love this SO MUUUCH liked by author

user14 this is a religious experience

user15 i ship them

laufey LFG 👽✨

user16 LAUFEY??

user17 you and your music saved me 🖤 liked by author

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alexandrasaintmleux shining again ☀️

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user18 HELP WHAT

user19 shining again after WHAT? traumatizing your ex gf?

user20 me when i forgot to take my meds

user21 so close! you're actually being stupid again!

user22 girl shut up

user23 wdym you never shined

user24 you're actually the shadow of everyone you date but whatever you say

user25 maybe the shine is the friends we made along the way

user26 nurse she got out again

user27 guys stop commenting mean things i can't like them all

user28 my kink is actually seeing your downfall and your bf's at real time

user29 this comment section is elite

user30 y/n would be proud

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yourusername Life without all the makeup and cool dresses 🌸🍒👩‍❤️‍👩

comments have been limited

[starpunkd]

Gotta tell you this: the Green Witch arc is exactly the arc after which I have been considering Sebaciel fully canon. No shitting, no kidding, no quote on quote thing. Just like this. Canon. Full stop.

Like, hear me out, OK? It is the MOST sexually charged arc of the whole manga so far. It deals a lot with Ciel's SA trauma, and it starts already with lots of references of sexual activities (which, btw were mentioned already in the Weston Arc, remember the conversation about Ciel and Lizzie in the SWAN gazebo?).

So in episode 1 of this arc's anime adaptation we have Sebastian talking about horny witches who might or might not have had sex with some demons, who might or might not have been Sebastian.

In episode 2 we have Sullivan and the hysterical dick grabbing, and Ciel's reaction to that.

Then we're going to have the mustard gas poisoning and some VERY explicitly naked swimming in that cauldron or whatever it was. Lots of very interesting artistic choices there, too.

Then the PTSD plot and Ciel's traumatic memories, also sexual in nature. And then...

The whole culmination of it is this. The "90% earnest" soul-eating aka black tendril monsterfuck, which Ciel ends up approving after it happens. After which he gets better and his relationship with Sebastian transforms yet again, and becomes much much warmer in the later chapters.

And to me it is absolutely clear as to how this scene is meant to be viewed by the people who are invested in their relationship. This is sex. And it's canon. And there's no way around it. It is just that. I know how uncomfortable it can make some people feel, but like... idgaff at this point. They have consummated their unholy marriage in the darkest xenosensual way possible. And I love it. This is exactly the kind of fuck I can picture for their first time without them becoming honeyfluff OOC. Huuuuuge many thanks to Yana for actually going there and drawing that. And I dunno how the studio has handled this scene, but so far I see they're pretty much sticking to the manga, so I hope we're gonna be served nice and hot.

One more time, louder for the folk in the back row: sebaciel is canon. Has been for years, actually.

I rest my case here, guys. You have the bestest day.

[kartoonatic]

Hazel and Bunny: In Defense of Hazel

I see a lot of talk about people not enjoying the Hazel and Bunny plot line of this game, and while personal taste is personal, I don't think it's entirely accurate or fair to say Hazel is stupid or gullible for trusting Bunny the way she does. I have a very very thorough explanation of why I think this. Let me explain, massive game spoilers under the cut:

First let's talk about Hazel's in game characterization so we can understand how she thinks and why she makes the choices she does. We can infer through Hazel's commentary that she has two prominent character traits: she is very empathetic and somewhat inexperienced when it comes to understanding toxic interpersonal dynamics. This is by no means all there is to her, but they are some defining traits of her character in the early half of the game.

She's inexperienced because she's been sheltered from topics like abuse and neglect by her mother, evidenced by the fact that Lacey shields her from the unpleasant details of her social work. Hazel is shocked to learn about the brutality Benjy experienced in his lifetime and expresses surprise in cutaways when her mother explains the toll her job takes on her.

[ID: Lacey: So hard for me not to take my feelings home to Hazel. I want to shield her, but I just keep pushing her away. Hazel: The things I saw! I get why mama had to "wash her day off" when she got home. Use up all our hot water on really bad days. End ID]

This makes sense given that Lacey is a very loving parent, and being in her line of work would know better than to tell her child the traumatic details of her cases even if she needed an outlet. But it means that while Lacey has the experience to understand what type of woman Bunny is, Hazel is not quite so good at clocking this type of behavioral pattern.

Let's pair this with the facts Hazel has available when she makes the choice to trust Bunny.

Bunny is the only living family Hazel has left outside of Lacey.

Bunny has access to a huge amount of information and resources, including the supernatural knowledge Hazel needs to find her mom.

Bunny has significant trauma around losing a child, which is definitely influencing her cold behavior.

Bunny has not (yet) been outwardly hostile to Hazel, even after she caught Hazel snooping around the vacation house uninvited. In fact, she gave Hazel fresh clothes and let her shower.

I hope we can appreciate the headspace this puts someone in. When you realize someone has been having a hard time in life and carrying that with them, you should be inclined to question the way you've been interpreting their behavior and adjust accordingly. Additionally, Hazel's sense of empathy is especially strong. She's invested in the stories of the people she sees on her journey despite many of them having died years ago. So to me it's not surprising that when she learns about Bunny and Trey's history, Hazel tries to rethink what she knows about her grandma. I think this is all why she decides to trust her by the end of chapter 6.

[ID: Hazel: Bunny buried every kid she brought into this world. That's gotta take a toll on you. End ID]

Here's my biggest theory: I think that Hazel's experience with Laurent actually reinforces her trust in Bunny instead of chipping away at it. Personally, Laurent's chapter solidified my dislike/distrust of Bunny, but from Hazel's perspective, I can see how this would cast doubts on whether Bunny is truly a bad person. Hazel likens her preconceived notions of Laurent to how she thought about Bunny. When Hazel confronts Laurent she's hurt by his past actions and allows that to shape their interaction. She only sees the way he hurt Lacey and doesn't give him time to explain himself.

[ID: Hazel: Until you didn't. You just up and left us one day! Did you even care? What was so wrong with mama? With us? End ID.]

As we progress through the level, we learn about the trauma that created his self destructive pattern of withdrawing from relationships like he had with Lacey.

[ID: Hazel: Mama always said Laurent had a tough childhood. "Tough" doesn't even begin to cut it. End ID]

She comes to find out that despite his issues, Laurent is generally a good guy.

[ID: Hazel: I mean... I remember her laughing a lot when you were around. End ID]

So think of it this way: If Hazel could be wrong about someone the way she was wrong about Laurent, she could be wrong about Bunny. Bunny has also experienced trauma, adopted questionable means of coping, and acts in seemingly irrational ways that might be explained (not excused) by her life experiences. Keep in mind that Hazel is empathetic by nature, she is moved by the struggles of others even when she has no personal stake in their story. And her lack of first hand experience with toxic family dynamics leaves her ill-prepared to understand that while Bunny loved one member of her family, she still might not love Hazel at all. I think she's unwilling to face this because despite it all, Hazel has always wanted a relationship with her grandmother. Otherwise she wouldn't have brought it up as early as chapter 1.

I think the core disconnect here is that the Huggin' Molly plot twist is extremely well foreshadowed to the audience. There's ample clues to Molly's real motives that are easy to pick up on. And based on your own experiences as a player you might have already made up your mind about Bunny (I know I did lol). But I don't necessarily believe that characters, who should be emotionally immersed in the story, need to act on every bit of information they receive especially if thematically it makes sense that they'd struggle to fully internalize it. I think less people would feel this way if Hazel had thrown out a few lines like "Bunny's the only family I have right now" or something that telegraphs her inner conflicts more clearly. But as is I just don't believe that Hazel trusting Bunny reflects negatively on Hazel's character.

TL;DR:

Hazel is naturally a very empathetic person who tries to see things from other's point of view.

Hazel lacks experience with toxic and manipulative people, and couldn't recognize those traits in Bunny.

She was wrong for judging Laurent the way she did and knowing that cast further doubts on her preconceived feelings towards Bunny.

The plot twist is very well foreshadowed while Hazel's inner monologue doesn't really elaborate her thought process in trusting Bunny, creating the sense that Hazel isn't questioning things enough.

[caramelmiacchiato]

after an entire day of no wifi at school i finished shatter me!! so here r my thoughts:

ab the characters:

juliette is not a bad fmc like ppl say, personally i js think shes traumatized as hell and carries a lot of wrong beliefs that were forced upon her since her childhood

warner is CRAZY that guy is INSANE he has serious mental P R O B L E M S. but i dont dislike him, im js intrigued for now

im indifferent to adam ig, hes sweet, but kinda dumb and ik hes hiding something

james i love you

kenji is fine ig, hes funny but im still indifferent ab him

plot:

many things happened and yet nothing happened. idk the pacing was weird i never knew what to think. my permanent state while reading was "???????????". i never knew if i was bored or if i was enjoying

others?

i kinda shipped adam and juliette at some point around 50% of the book but after they ran away tgt and kept making out after every five seconds i couldnt stand them anymore ☠️

i dont trust that castle guy

its cool to know other ppl have powers like juliette

why does she uses so many metaphors 😭 i never knew when she was being fr or not like "i got shot in the head and my guts spilled in the floor. anyway adams lips r so pretty". confusing af

the makeout scene w warner was also super weird bc wtf wasnt he supposed to be super smart???? how did he get fooled so easily?

anyways ig thats all, if i remember smth ill post later 😋 gotta start reading destroy me now

tagging some moots who followed the reading journey: @rainforcsts @y2kinnow @meangirlsbway @0littlejoysworld @luvrism777 @jtoddsangel @inkstainsonmysheets

[aidlyncanon]

we dont talk about taylors pov enough its always everyone else but ive never seen a single person talk about her like trauma alone

Like I feel like I only ever see people talk about how their fathers death effected Tyler never Taylor.

She had her father die at a young age, she watched her mom basically spiral until she wasn't in a well enough mental state to properly take care of the kids (love her tho). Sure she had Tyler who promised he'd take care or them but was that easy? I mean she watched her brother lose interest in everything after Ethan. Imagine her realizing she couldnt do anything about that.

Parents days, seeing other kids with their parents all around them. Holidays and Fathers day passing each year slowly being less ans less enjoyable.

Now to the actual plot.

We already saw how she reacted but still.

Red said on her story (you can see in character info) that the twins have severe separation anxiety. So like actually imagine seeing your brother fucking fall of a cliff.

Spending hours looking for him unsure if hes even alive. Not only is that the first real time they've been separated but thats the first time someone in the group has died (not that theyre aware hes dead).

When she wakes up hes just idk seizing? idk bro got possessed but regardless she just immediately broke down. Completely unsure of what was happening.

Imagine rhe fear when Tylers now in the hospital, the last time someone was in the hospital for something major she never saw them again.

The relief when he came out and they reunited (i sobbed). Her finally being allowed to go with him.

Then the NEXT NIGHT she finds her brother on a tree IMPALED and extremely injured. That shit was traumatizing. So luckily they get him down but oh look gotta stitch him up because again majorly injured.

Then when they finally get to a "safe place" aiden fucking dies. Sure there wasn't much of a reaction likely due to being aware that he'd wake up and the adrenaline of "get the fuck under the table" but still.

So yk they wake up, aiden wakes up, all is well right?

nah they get kidnapped the next day.

So she wakes up in a room alone unsure of where she is, if logan, ben or ashlyn are there and okay. At this point shes not aware tyler (or aiden) is there until Alex tells her.

So great shes alone again all day until the phantom dimension where shes still trapped in a room alone with the knowledge her brother and friend are hurt.

Now I could say more but thats fast pass so I cant but either way i need more people to talk about taylor please 🙏

[starlightafterastorm]

Ok i am SWAMPED right now but I've gotta share the concept of an angsty plot bunny with the kingdon fandom because The Pitt is invading my brain and distracting me from my other hyperfixation.

(I also have so many thoughts for a non-angsty very fluffy sweet plot bunny but this one is running around in my brain non-stop right now)

Have a very long outline after the cut

Concept:

Med School AU

Where "she fell first" Mel and "he doesn't know he fell until he realizes he's already fallen harder" Frank have a drunk one - night stand after Frank broke up with his girlfriend (Abby???). Next morning, Mel is in the kitchen making breakfast, Frank comes in and asks if Mel got him home safe because he doesn't remember kissing Mel and sleeping with her. He woke up in bed alone. He thought it was a dream.

EX GIRLFRIEND (ABBY???) SHOWS UP. Asks Frank to get back together. Mel excuses herself.

CLICHE PREGNANCY TROPE. TRAUMATIC MISCARRIAGE.

(Between med school and Becca and parental trauma Mel wouldn't have chosen to keep the baby anyway but it's still an incredibly emotionally and physically complicated time)

Yolanda in med school with them??? Yolanda is the one who drives Mel to the clinic and helps her with the aftercare??? The only one who knows the full truth??? Which partially fuels Yolanda's complicated feelings of "Langdon's a great doctor and kind of one of my closest friends but also I kind of resent him for this situation so I'm going to snipe at him any chance I get"

Angsty conversation where Frank is majorly concerned about Mel's health and finds out she's recovering from a miscarriage. He doesn't know the baby was his but he's mad cuz the guy Mel slept with should have been more careful with her and Mel tells him it's ok. She knew what she was getting into because he "only wanted her because he was drunk". It drives Frank crazy because who would ever treat Mel like that?

Mel/Frank drift apart. Because of Abby? Becca? Covid? Issues with money and Mel's mom's death and whatever's going on with her dad? combo of all of those things? Unclear right now.

SMASH CUT FLASH FORWARD.

Past The Pitt season 1 and Mel/Frank reunion.

Past rehab.

Past divorce.

Past rekindling the friendship and codependency and solid ground and Mel being adored by Frank and the Langdon kids.

Frank tells Mel that she's beautiful and he's so in love with her. Mel says "that's not possible. you've only ever found me attractive when you're drunk and you've been sober for over a year now"

“I love you.”

“…I don’t know how to believe you.”

And that hurts more than anything Abby or Robby has ever said about how much he’s disappointed them.

Cue Frank crying on his therapist's couch because Mel straight up refuses to believe him, Yolanda shaking her head and laying down the truth to Frank after all these years, Mel just like "I thought we settled this matter years ago? Why are you stirring up my hurt again??"

Mel knows what it's like to love Frank without being loved (knowing she's loved) in return. That's normal to her.

Poor baby compartmentalized all her feelings and she doesn't know what to do if that dynamic changes.

Meanwhile Santos is on the side with no idea of any of the history or context at all of what's going on with Frank and Mel and Yolanda somehow refereeing the two of them but she's ready to throw down at any time.

"Do you want me to castrate him for you?" the scalpel is already in her hand

"No thank you, Trinity. He just reminded me that i'm not the kind of woman who is meant to be loved or wanted in the typical way that a man wants a woman"

"... Did he fucking say that to you??? Where's Garcia??? She'll help me hide the body. Dana will too."

long aggrieved sigh from Mel. "No, Trinity."

This obviously ends up happily but I need the 50k angstfest of Frank rethinking every conversation he's ever had with Mel with the knowledge that she was in love with him and he was in love with her but he didn't know he was.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?"

"Why would I disrupt our friendship? I'm clearly not your type and then you entered a serious relationship. My feelings were my burden to carry."

I could probably add more to this just sitting here right now but I needed to get this out.

The angstttttt

[ktlurksforsomereason]

Obxanon is not reliable, they're just directing hate away from the Pates and onto Rudy+Elaine.

I'm gonna say this one time and then I gotta jump this ship. And before I get called a Rudy stan or wtfever, I'm trying to be as objective as possible. No one here is in the right. I just want people to think about the bigger picture.

Obxanon is not reliable, and the way they present the information is bias.

I'm not saying that there isn't truth to their story. I'm not saying that nothing happened behind the scenes. I don't believe the producers when they say they planned JJ's death from the beginning. I don't believe the fake PR that says there is no beef between Rudy and Madison. We know there is. We can see the tension between them in the show, and we can see it behind the scenes. There's proof that something is wrong. But we don't know WHAT and WHY.

What I am saying is that just because obxanon has some truth and some insight, it does not mean that everything they say is true. And the way they are presenting us this information paints everyone in a positive light except Rudy and Elaine. That's bias.

Obxanon excuses the Pate's decision to kill JJ, saying they were "rightfully upset." That was their decision, not Rudy's. That death and the horrible way it was written is on them.

Obxanon also says Elaine was jealous, but doesn't tell us WHY. They say there was conflict between Elaine and the Pates, Elaine and Lilah, Elaine and Madison, but they don't tell us WHY. That leaves it open to speculation, it leaves people to fill in the blanks. Obxanon offers us zero insight into how Elaine felt, why she was upset, why there was conflict. It just paints Elaine as the problem and forces us to guess WHY.

Obxanon says Rudy decided to leave the show and suggests it had something to do with Elaine, but they don't actually tell us WHY. Again, leaves it open to speculation.

Everything obxanon is saying is BIAS. They do nothing to explain Rudy and Elaine's reasons for anything. I'm not saying they're good people and they made healthy choices, but obxanon is trying to imply that they are BAD people and they made HORRIBLE choices. That is bias.

They are HUMANS. They make choices for a reason. If there was actually conflict between Elaine and Madison for YEARS behind the scenes, there are REASONS for this conflict. And we don't know these reasons. Obxanon isn't tell us. Rudy and Elaine aren't telling us. Madison and Mariah aren't telling us. WE DON'T KNOW.

I just need people to really think about the information we're getting from obxanon and why they might be painting it like this. I think it's PR. I think it is distracting us from how angry we feel about the show, and is channeling that anger onto Rudy and Elaine. Who have never, NEVER spoken about this conflict and have never tried to justify anything.

Netflix and the Pates know this fandom. They know how hateful they can be. Will people watch S5 if they’re mad at the Pates for their garbage writing? No. But will people watch S5 if they’re mad at Rudy and he’s the problem and he’s gone? Maybe. Obxanon is just tapping into that anger and hate and fuelling it away from the show and onto Rudy.

You need to remember where we started. Fans love Jiara because they love JJ. So many people love this show because they love JJ. That's obviously clear, look at the uproar over his death. You know why they love JJ? Because Rudy created him and made us love him. Rudy did that. Rudy gave us that.

We would not care about JJ or Jiara if Rudy didn't do the work that he did. And here everyone is, hating on him. Hoping his career fails. Hoping he breaks up with his partner.

That's gross.

I understand why people are mad. Season 4 was a shitshow. Terrible writing, ridiculous plot holes, character assassination, a loss of chemistry between the fan favourite couple. Finished off with a completely traumatizing and unsatisfying death of the favourite character. The show is irreparably damaged.

THAT IS NOT ALL RUDY'S FAULT.

I'm not saying he didn't play a part in it, but it is not JUST on him. And alllllll of that anger is being directed at him in the form of bullying and hatred.

He's a person. People make mistakes. But they also make choices for themselves, and clearly he felt he needed to make this choice. We can't begin to criticize that unless we know the reason and WE DON'T.

I will not watch season 5 and that is the Pate's fault for completely losing the plot. For not understanding why so many fans loved this show.

I also need to leave this fandom because people are so hateful and NO ONE is thinking critically about the situation.

Please try to look at the bigger picture. Please try to understand that these people are human beings. We don't know them. We don't know what happened on that set. We don't know why anyone made the choices we did. So chill out?

Be upset about the show but don't be upset with the actors. They did their job and it's done. Leave them alone.

[084thoughts]

Ravi Fics (Part 3)

Separated into categories and listed by word count from least to greatest. AO3 ratings are highlighted -> Gen Teen Mature Explicit Not Rated (NR)

🔥 labeled fics are some of my personal favorites!!

Please read tags/descriptions before to avoid any triggering or explicit content. Many of these fics discuss childhood cancer, chronic and mental illness, explicit sexual activity, and/or traumatic injury.

Basically all of the romantic/sexual pairings w Ravi are rarepairs (because 9-1-1 can't seem to bother giving him character development 🙄) so if you don't vibe w a ship, just don't read it. I included some great non-slash fics, and a entire section for Buddie-centric fics.

Ravi Lore 📚

dance with me tonight (like everything's alright) by stayeven for sp1dergal | T | 2.6k | Autoimmune Diseases, Long-Term Hospitalization, Panikkar Family, Diwali, Heartfelt ravi begins by shortndiaz | G | 6.2k | Ravi joins the 118, Whump, Cancer Treatment, Minor Character Death, Family (Ravi’s and the 118), Childhood Friend, Chemo 🔥more than a body, more than a name by diabolicaldean | M | 6.6k | Cancer Treatment, Family Feels, Angst, Ravi’s Brother, Journey to Becoming a Firefighter

118 Friendships 🚒

What We Didn't See, Who We Almost Lost by ReySmitty813 | NA | 1.1k | Follow-up to got time to bleed (just one thing i need), The 118 reflect on how they've been treating Ravi, Whump, Hospitalization, Injury, Apologizes 🔥Patti by firehosebuckley | T | 3.5k | Ravi accidentally gives Buck a nickname, Malayalam, Idiot White Boy Buckley, Ravi & Buck Friendship, Jealous Eddie, Mutual Pining A place we could escape sometimes by endversebuddie | NR | 3.1k | 5 times Ravi comes out to someone + 1 time someone comes out to him, Found Family, Short & Sweet 🔥Please Report to HR (And Bring Snacks) by Buddiepls | M | 3.5k | Ravi & the 118 Friendships, Ravi/OFC, Drunken Shenanigans, Fluff & Smut, the plot twist in chapter 2 (!!!) HITS 🔥If You Fall Asleep Down By The Water byfruitsdoesnotknow | T | 5.3k | Ravi officially adopted by the 118, Family Feels, Concussion, Minor Injury, Unconditional Love, Birthday Celebration, Ravi is appreciated!!!

Whump ⚡️

Funeral Fun Time by ferager | G | <1k | Bobby's funeral spec, Post 8x14/15, Survivor's Guilt she’s the angel of small death (and the codeine scene) by Rebel_material_girl | G | 1k | Ravi NDE, Internal Dialogue, The 118 A-Shift Curse, Fire 🔥give me your hand (i am your friend) by theoreticlove | G | 1.3k | Ravi trapped on an accident, Flashbacks, Childhood Cancer, Traumatic Injury, Angst got time to bleed (just one thing i need) by doveious | NA | 3.2k | Ravi is injured during a rescue, May/Ravi, Injury, Blood Loss 🔥I Hate Hospitals by Buckleys_Girl911 | T | 8.1k | Ravi and Maddie bond over shared childhood trauma, Flashbacks, Cancer, Daniel Buckley, Post 8x15, Everyone is alive, Angst, Hurt/Comfort Smoke over a blue sky by ferager | T | 9.8k | May and Ravi are taken hostage, NDEs, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Kidnapping, Canon-Typical Injuries 🔥sorry, can't stay (i gotta run, run, yeah) by rainny_days | T | 21k | Ravi and Buck are trapped in a time loop, 8x14, Temporary Character Deaths, POV Buck, POV Ravi, Trauma Bonding, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Childhood Cancer

May/Ravi 💐

🔥strange, you never knew by cranberrymoons | T | <1k | 8x16 Coda, Bobby's Funeral/Wake, Mourning, Grief, Sorta First Meeting, they are both sad and lonely grounds for affection by doveious | T | 1.1k | May/Ravi, Meet-Cute, Short & Sweet, Coffee Shops Ornamental Traditions by RileyMasters | G | 1.3k | May/Ravi, Christmas Traditions, Flirting $1000 per video by ferager | T | 1.8k | Mavi go public on Tiktok, Crack, Harry bullies them into getting cancelled, 118 as a Family The Dinner Guest by ferager | G | 1.9k | May/Ravi, Bathena, POV Athena, Relationship Reveal, Fluff 🔥all that glitters by ferager | G | 2.5k | May/Ravi, Established Relationship, Valentine's Day, Gift Giving, Fluff

🔥the first day of my life by glitterjemstone | G | 2.6k | Pre-Relationship May/Ravi, The 118 as a Family, Bonding, First Meeting, Flirting The Captain's Daughter by BangPop91 | G | 2.9k | May and Ravi over the course of their relationship, Friendship, Speculation, Cute & Fluffy 🔥relief / disbelief by ferager | T | 3k | May and Ravi find comfort in each other after Bobby’s death, Angst, Mourning, Hookup Five times Ravi and May were almost caught (and one time they were) by ferager | T | 5.2k | May/Ravi, 5 + 1, Secret Relationship, Fluff 🔥A Guide to Getting Caught by ferager | T | 10k | May/Ravi, Failed Secret Relationship, 118 Family Feels, Hijinks, Making Out

Other Pairings ❤️‍🔥

sensin some undertone (bad idea right?) by withmeornotatall | M | 2.2k | Buck/Ravi, Post 8x14/15, Hookup, Mutual Assured Self Destruction, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, both of them are traumatized temporary fix by screamingcolours | E | 2.6k | Buck/Ravi, Hookup, Angst, Explicit Sex, 8x14 Coda

Buddie Centric 🏡

Flirting by CallmeG | G | 1.2k | Ravi questions Buddie, Short & Sweet, Flirting, Crack Treated Seriously, how s4 should have gone 🔥maybe i'm trapped with you, but you also trapped with me by abichaf | T | 1.3k | Crack, 8x17/18 Spec, Ravi has had enough, idiot4idiot 911, I'd Like to Report a Hate Crime (aka Operation: Gaslight Ravi) by undercoverwillshaper | T | 1.4k | Ravi hazed by the 118, Evil Power Couple Buddie, One-Shot, Silly Goofy just a boy (not a threat) by Keiylle | T | 1.5k | Minor Buck/Ravi, Scene taken from TLOU Part 2, Dina/Elle Winter Dance scene, Past Buddie, TW Gerrard (as Seth obv) what's a DILF? by on_mars for hexensalbei | T | 1.6k | Ravi trolls Buddie, Crack, Idiots in Love, Getting Together Ravi, Rattled and Realizing by prairie_gentian | G | 2.6k | 118 Family Feels, Ravi is weirded out by them, Annoying Buddie two gays with one stone by daylightsashley | M | 3k | Buddie + Ravi Third-wheeling, Getting Together, 8x18 Spec, Trapped in a hole 🔥i got you, i won't let go by rainny_days | E | 6.2k | Follow up to sorry, can't stay (i gotta run, run, yeah), Jealous Eddie, Ravi & Buck Friendship, Post-Time Loop, Buddie Getting Together, Kitchen Sex (!!), Ravi is a sweetheart

@cal-daisies-and-briars @doveious @queerpanikkar @hoediaz @bipitybopitydoo @strawberryspence @thetalee @to-be-a-dreamer @rainbow-nerdss @exhuastedpigeon @fruitsdontknow

@waveridden @chromatophorica @vgreysoncellars @sammyunhinged @likeshipsonthesea @shelfthe-reader @harpermiller @thirteenredvampirebites @sailorbadger

@whim-prone-pirate @palzeddie @inell @mariiverse @queenofravens01 @nightmareglitter @clockwork-stars @moonlightandromache @aashiqeddiediaz @fallingthorns

@timeshareindestin @hotcinnamonsunset @palzeddie @buddivorce @eddiesprius @odythreesome @tweetsongs @cowboy-eddie

⭐️ i apologize if you are not tagged as one of the writers for these works - lmk if i missed your @ so i can credit you 😊

⭐️ leave a tag or comment below to fuel my 911 obsession!!

[herondalesbooklover]

Controversial take (maybe)

I really don't understand the lyra hate, like she literally has done nothing. I understand that people might not like her, and I think the criticism towards her personality is valid (even if I don't agree), we all have different opinions, but saying that you HATE her is just so weird for me. Like, on what reasons? The most terrible thing she did on tgg was probably concussing that guy who catcalled her.

We barely know anything about her. She wasn't even that pety to the hawthornes despite the whole thing with her father, she explicitly mentioned that they had nothing to do with it, they were children. Her issues with grayson were because of the last call they had when he told her to stop calling, from the book you can clearly infer that the tone that he used made a big impression on her, that is why she didn't like him (gotta be honest with you, I think lyra in the third call, sort of flirted with him at first).

There are so many other characters that have done shitty things, like rohan who literally broke Jameson's ribs and is treating people as tools to get what he wants, savannah who is plotting against avery, grayson who tried avery like shit when he first met her (btw, nothing against them, I love them, but I can't deny what the have done/ are doing), jameson who treated avery as a game at first, and others, and they are not that hated. And then, there is lyra who is just a traumatized girl, and some people act like she was the devil reincarnated...like for real???

Too long, had to take it out of my chest. For me hating lyra is like hating avery, xander, gigi or libby, they have done nothing wrong.

[bitchliteraria1906]

These three are very different characters if we’re going by plot, but I still think they'd relate to each other and cry if you put them in the same room and forced them to talk.

Shout out to rebellious female characters who try to act like nothing affects them but are actually healivy traumatized, indulge themselves a lot, and who's love interests are themed around music (and specifically violins). Gotta be one of my favorite genders.

[lilgoblinbitch]

saw your post about rick and daryl, do you think you could write a rick TOWL smut with him angry that you left your post and got yourself injured and he takes out his frustration on you? idk why just had that idea after the recent episode😫

Grimes' Dominion 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

rick grimes x fem!reader

a/n: ahhh omg yes i actually had time to think abt this for a few nights. i added a bit of plot to this because i love me some backstory & descriptions. but anyway i made this pretty lengthy so if u wanna skip to the smut part just look for the '💋'. here is your plotty smut! lmk your thoughts ₊˚⊹♡

warnings: smut 18+, PinV, unprotected sex, oral/face fucking (male receiving), slight bondage, fingering, ass slapping, hair pulling, orgasm denial, degradation (use of ‘slut’ and ‘whore’), language, mentions of blood and injury, angsty angsty angst!, reader is a mother, overall Rick is very rough so you have been warned

wc: 6k

MDNI

It was training day at your post. You had recently graduated from consignee and signed up to become a CRM soldier. It took you six whole years to get to this point. While your agility and militia knowledge were already unprecedented, the CRM didn't fuck around when it came to producing the world's most unrivalled soldiers. It was serious business.

Nearly eight years ago, you trekked a long journey down from your small community in southern New Jersey. You lost everything: your husband, your friends, and the people you lived with and grew stronger with through the grisly and dilapidated post-apocalyptic world. Terrible people – which were apparently becoming more and more common – destroyed your community, leaving very few survivors. It was you and your newborn child who managed to escape safely; you weren't able to go back to see if others had made it out. For almost two years you were alone, and your only hope left was keeping your baby boy alive...

Fast forward two years after the traumatic fallout you managed to escape, you discovered, or rather you were found by, a giant military in Pennsylvania, called the CRM. A military that bordered and protected a whole city of people – 200,000 of them. Out of desperation and maternal instinct, you bargained with the militia in hopes to give your two-year-old son a stable future. The CRM agreed to place your son in a 'nurturing fostering service' within the safe confines of the protected city – known as the Civic Republic of Philadelphia – so long as you swore to abide by the military's code and regulations by becoming a consignee.

Of course you agreed, because you were nonetheless terrified of what would happen to your baby boy if you didn't play it safe with this strong force. But for a while you lost it, you couldn't bear not seeing your child – they took him from you. You became defensive of your child, throwing yourself into dilemmas with whoever refused to listen to you. Except no one ever took notice of an angry and hurt mother because the CRM showed little mercy about their policies. And no matter how much force you put into finding hope about getting to your son, you'd always end up falling right back where you left off.

Soon enough you learned from acquiring an acquaintance that not only did the CRM take the only family you had left away from you, they were the ones responsible for destroying your home in the first place.

But now, six years later, you were predisposed to fight whoever and whatever got in your way in order to see your son again. You were a force to be reckoned with.

"No, you're doing it wrong. You gotta follow through, like this—" your sweaty hand maneuvered the heavy spear, sending it soaring through the air at high speed and finally piercing the bullseye of the target. You turned to the soldier beside you, who, to say the least, looked perplexed.

"What?" You huffed, blowing a loose strand of hair out of your face. "Ya give up? Need a break?"

"’Ey! Rogers, I'mma need ya to head back inside. We're gonna start sizing you all up for your new gear."

A brooding and strict man, Sergeant Major Rick Grimes, commanded the young man beside you. "Uh, yes sir," he saluted, then jogged toward the dome-shaped building.

Rick Grimes used to be a consignee like you were, and you even heard stories where he tried escaping at least four times. No one ever fled, or even attempted to, without failing. Escaping the hellhole was like trying to fit your right shoe on your left foot, it was entirely fruitless. But you heard all the stories about Rick, and how he got to become a leader. After the death of Lieutenant Colonel Donald Okafor, Rick was trained to replace his position by virtue of General Beale taking note of his loyalty to the military. Now, Rick was scaling further up the ranks. He was Sergeant Major, and in charge of the post you currently resided in.

You looked up to him, though, not because he was your leader, but because he understood you. He recognized how it felt to have your family ripped from your hands and not be able to do anything about it. You were able to bond with him. Most nights he would invite you to his apartment and the two of you'd spill your guts to one another over a glass or two of bourbon. That is how he got to know you, and see through your clouded demeanor that you kept in check. You were fierce and obstinate, because the place you were trapped in forced you to be that way, and truthfully Rick admired that about you. He was never able to relate with someone as well as he did with you.

Feedback echoed from Rick's receiver and he lifted it to his masked face, stating his position and whatnot. You crossed your arms, waiting for him to give you an order. "Well?"

He turned his attention to you, finally. "We need to talk." His one good hand snagged a hold of your arm and guided you toward a smaller brick-designed building, which you recognized to be the building that housed the high ranking officials like Rick himself.

"What do we need to talk about? And why is Rogers getting his gear but I'm not?" You struggled against his grip, a decision that ended with futility as his clutch tightened when you tried pulling away from him. You furrowed your brows and grunted in annoyance.

"Relax, sweetheart, you're not in trouble. Actually it's quite the opposite." Once again he faced you, stopping in his tracks as you both had reached the air-conditioned building. His grasp on your arm loosened and then reached for his matte black helmet detailed with red outlining. Your eyes darted across the room, taking in the essence of prestige and momentarily locking in on the various framed photos on the walls, which depicted a few recognizable CRM authoritative figures. One particular photo caught your attention, and you carefully examined it, discerning it to be Rick himself with a shiny black name plate decorating the bottom of the frame.

Your gaze finally diverted back to Rick, whose helmet popped off in a swift motion, freeing his slightly disheveled brown and gray curls, and his stern blue eyes – the spellbinding reflections to his enigmatic soul. And this man was undoubtedly a sight for sore eyes. 

The silence was disrupted by the shuffling of Rick’s boots, his curt footsteps leading him across the room. He pulled out a chair from the corner and without any trouble picked it up with one hand and set it down across from a dark wooden desk. “Sit.” He motioned to the chair, and then found a seat in the larger, more cushioned chair adjacent to it. Without a peep you sauntered over to the wooden chair and sat, folding your hands on the desk in front of you. 

“You gonna keep me on edge or are you gonna tell me why I’m here and not at training and getting my gear?”

His serious eyes bored into yours now, hinting that he wasn’t in the mood for your cynicism. “I brought you in here to tell you that you’re going to become Colonel under my order.”

You scoffed comically and dropped your hands to your sides, gripping the chair with force. “That’s ridiculous. Me – Colonel? Why?” 

Rick’s focus never left your unserious face – one that was twisted with amusement. With a slight tilt of his head, he spoke, “Because you’re one of the best fighters and you’re fit to start leading, I know it. And I trust you, so does Major General Beale. We both expect your habitual commitment from now on.”

While you were still preoccupied with processing this information, Rick reached into one of his sleeve pockets and pulled out a silver badge, decorated with ‘Col.’ followed by your full name. He slid it across the desk toward you and you scrutinized it before giving him a look of disapproval and sliding the badge back to him. You shook your head in defiance.

“No thanks.” 

He frowned and once again his frigid stare taunted you, something you’d undoubtedly gotten used to very much over the past few years that you'd known him. He leaned forward and for a second you could feel the steam emitting from his nose as he exhaled, eyes scanning your face for any signs of possible sarcasm. You were dead serious now, though.

“This isn’t an offer you can refuse. It’s an order,” the sergeant commanded, grabbing the badge reiteratively and this time placing it firmly into your hand. “So take it, and don’t lose it.” 

You remained perched in your spot, not stirring any muscle, just studying his face with the badge dancing across your fingertips. Rick was not going to take ‘no’ for an answer. “Now do as I say, and meet me in that meeting room over there, in 10 minutes.”

You snarled and swiftly rose, shoving the badge into your zipper pocket. Without even giving Rick another look you booked it out the door full tilt.

All throughout meeting with Grimes and Command Sergeant Major Thorne and overlooking your shared brigade of soldiers, your mind couldn’t escape the worry you had about your son, and how you were going to escape and find him. Your mind raced as you tried to recollect what the map of your base looked like, so that you could pinpoint which weak spots there were around the perimeter.

You recall a little while back which security took which shifts at each area of the southwest perimeter where your complex was, but it wasn’t all that simple since sometimes they’d switch shifts around. However, security officers periodically switched their attention to different areas at a time out along the walls, so you could use that as leverage to sneak your way around and cut a hole in one of the fences–

Nah. That would be too obvious, and dangerously stupid. You needed to really think this through – come up with a strategic plan. So that’s what you were prepared to do after your first night of training as Colonel. 

Sweaty and disheveled, you entered your sleeping quarters and kicked the door shut, immediately peeling off your bulky armor and tossing your heavy combat boots across the floor. With a satisfactory sigh, you trotted over to the shower and flipped the handle all the way to the left – you needed a steamy shower to filter out all the stress your body had been loaded with that day. Not only that, the steam would help you think, and you needed your head clear if you were going to figure out how to leave successfully that night. 

If you were going to escape – if. You needed to keep that thought in mind, because it sure as hell wasn’t going to be a piece of cake.

Frantically you shoved a handful of essentials into a black backpack – a lighter, duct tape, a pocket knife, flashlight, and a small glock you 'borrowed' from your trip with rick to the armory earlier. After zipping up the bag you threw on your combat boots and your gloves. You checked your watch for the time; 11:48 it read. The moon was scintillating in the sky and beaming with conviction. You took one last glimpse around the room to check if you had forgotten any extra tools or gadgets, and before you confirmed that you were ready to head out, you spotted something on the rusty gunmetal colored nightstand.

Inquisitively you wandered over to the table and examined a small, white folded paper. You unfolded it and inside it read, in urgent script:

“Meet me at my place at 11:30 tonight. Need to talk again.

-R.G.”

Too late now. Not happening. Besides, you were sure it was another booty call because for one, on busy task days like tonight, Rick often had a knack for ‘letting off steam,’ which meant fucking your brains out. Sorry, Rick, but my child is more important to me than easing your sexual frustration. And two, it was already reaching midnight…why else would he want to “talk” to you so late at night? Rick was just too obvious.

Speaking of Rick…

The man who shared his bourbon with you for the first time two years ago. That very night he had spilled to you CRM’s legacy and the nightmares behind it. The two of you bonded over your mutual grievance toward the antagonizing militia. Rick spurred hope in you finally leaving and finding your son; if anyone could help you escape it was him. But he changed – his interest in leaving the CRM no longer seemed to exist. After all, he was already climbing his way up the military rank. He was gaining power and respect, and that seemed to be more crucial to him then getting back to his own children. 

So, screw him. He had his chance to leave with you, and it already passed – because now you were tiptoeing out your apartment and being welcomed into the darkness of the night.

You were cautious of your surroundings, turning a few corners and eluding one or two officers. You noticed the southwest wall, which didn't look impossible to climb. You discovered a hefty pile of broken shipment container parts – bingo. And that's what you used to climb the wall. unfortunately your endeavor led to you stumbling and hitting both your knee and your arm against the metal object, then landing with your hands scraping against the unforgiving concrete. Fuck. What an idiot you were. Surely someone within about twenty feet of you heard you basically eat shit.

Gritting your teeth and whimpering from the twinge that shot through your knees and hands, you managed to put every fiber of your being to use and push yourself off the ground, only to end up on your ass with a humph. You winced as you peeked at your hands, using the flashlight from your bag to examine how badly cut they were. Blood leaked from multiple crevices in your palms, and you didn’t even bother paying much mind to your bruised knee or elbows because there was no time to dawdle.

“Shit. You need to get up now!” You scolded yourself, but as you tried standing up completely, your knees buckled. Well, at least behind this building it was dark enough for no one to see you, unless they heard you already…

Your alert ears picked up the sound of shoes marching upon the solid ground, and you cursed to yourself; someone was coming, but there was nothing you could do because they had already heard you most likely. “Just play dead, or pretend you passed out!” 

You heard your name being called out from somewhere behind you.

The pace of your heartbeat quickened drastically, causing your head to spin toward the voice. Well, shit. It was Rick Grimes himself. This time his helmet wasn’t on and he seemed to have abandoned his uniform. He was instead dressed in jeans and that black tee that always hugged his muscles so perfectly–

“What the fuck are you doing?” His voice boomed in your ears as he knelt down to your level, and you shivered.

You wheezed and resumed your pursuit of getting your ass off the wretched ground, to which you failed. Rick noticed the cuts and bruises decorating your injured body and his face softened. He sighed, gathering your belongings, and then in one swift motion he lifted you up off your feet, holding you bridal-style. You bit your lip to stop the tears forming in your eyes; your plan backfired, you got caught, and now everything was out of your control. You felt so stupid and useless.

Rick shifted around with you in his arms, taking one last glance at your injured figure. “Oh, honey. Let’s get ya cleaned up now.”

He had carried you all the way to his room without any hindrances, and the whole time you honestly thought about kicking out of his tight grasp, nailing him where the sun doesn't shine, and booking it out of there. But the way his strong arms cradled you made you melt into him.

Rick lay you onto his large – well, larger than your own – neatly made bed and pulled your shoes and socks off. Before he could reach your pant zipper to pull them down and examine your knee, you slapped his hand away, scowling at him.

“I can do it,” you promised, although of course your trembling hands reaching for the zipper illustrated a paradoxical story.

Not to mention, the stained blood and soreness reminded you that you needed to ease up on any further use of them. It felt like carpal tunnel. Damn, that concrete did some numbers on you. Your exasperated grunts caught Rick’s attention and he ignored your misleading comment, zipping your pants down and peeling them off himself. The look you gave him could have been detected as either annoyed or demoralized. Either way, your body was weary and your mind still raced with unrelenting thoughts. 

Rick brought back a wet cloth and a first aid kit he kept under his sink. Gingerly, he brushed the cloth over your battered hands and then bandaged them up. You let out a few pained huffs while he went to work on your scraped hands and busted knee with his doctor abilities. When finished, his eyes scanned your body, being certain he didn’t miss any other wounds or minor cuts.

You, however, were busy ogling him; his beautifully sculpted figure that was outlined by the black t-shirt he wore, and the scruff that layered his defined jaw, and the way his pink lips pursed as his rough hand prodded your exposed flesh – it sent you into a trance. 

He adjusted his gaze back to your face, and you snapped out of your trance promptly, painting that stern cast back on your expressive face. You recalled why you were irritated with him in the first place – he prevented you from escaping.

“Y’alright now? Gonna tell me why you were scurrying around past midnight with this bag on you?”

Your hard stare didn’t falter. He tsked at you and grabbed the backpack off the ground, unzipping it, and dumping its contents onto the bed. When he recognized the gun to be one from the armory, it was his turn to scowl at you.

“You better start talking before I get angry, sweetheart.” His body flexed as he folded his arms across his chest, eyes cornering you and making you feel small.

“I was–” you cleared your throat and sat up with your hands on your bare thighs, “I was going to escape, Rick. I… I need to see him…”

Rick lowered his head to the floor in disappointment, rubbing the bridge of his nose while his other arm rested on his hip. He paced the room. “You knew this was going to happen. We even planned it together, for fuck’s sake!” You pleaded with him, emotion spilling from your lips. You stared at his back, watching the way his muscles tensed. “I have a child I haven’t seen in years and I–”

“Yeah, so do I!” He interrupted, “But that life is over, there is no more escape plan pipe dream. Don’t you get it?!”

His pacing ceased, and he waited for your focus to meet him. When it did, he inched toward you daringly, almost wanting you to test his patience.

“I got you that ranking because I trusted you and expected you to be cooperative with me in this mission. I was planning on trying to convince Beale to let you visit your boy but that won’t be for a while. I need your trust in this,” Rick’s footsteps approached the bed, his towering figure intimidating you. “Do you understand? Look at me—” his rough hand pinched the sides of your chin to tilt your head up at him. 

Your lips cracked open to speak but truthfully nothing could be said in that moment. The tension in the air was heavy and laced with despondency. You choked trying to enunciate words as you felt your shoulders drop, and your heart chugging on. Soon you gathered yourself from breaking down in front of him, masking the persistent commotion going on inside the walls of your skull, and the unabated sense of dread pouring over your body. You nodded your head in compliance and Rick released your chin.

This was a confirmation that Rick was never going to let you get away. And if he did end up finding a way for you to see your boy, living under an unlawful and controlling military organization was not something you stood for. With or without Rick, you needed to escape with your son, using any proper chance that swung your way. But if it was going to be without Rick, you needed to be secretive. 

You batted your eyes at him, aiming to give him a reason to believe that you were officially yielding to him. The way you looked under him, all battered and desperate, made a spark ignite in his brain. You belonged in this position – underneath him, following his lead, and obeying his orders. He was going to need to show you how insistent he really was.

Your attention remained undivided. Rick stepped backwards a foot and took in the sight of you – your whole body and the way your thighs begged to be kissed and touched.

“I’m assuming you saw the note I left you, right?” His tone dripping with vehemence and his southern drawl rasping, relaying a yearning to your eager core, which you attempted to ease by clenching your thighs. He certainly did not miss that.

“So you were planning on not only ignoring my note, but being reckless and trying to leave this post and then, what? Risk getting caught and dying and never getting to see your son ever? You need to get your head on right, and I’m telling you this from experience, because it’s never going to work out the way you want it to, no matter how perfectly you think your plan will go.”

You gulped and studied your hands, which were thankfully stinging much less. You fiddled with the bandage, until Rick demanded your attention with his authoritative tone.

“This is the last time I’m gonna ask you to cooperate with me. Keep that in mind,” he warned.

Your front teeth bit into your pouty bottom lip as you struggled to make yourself look uncritical of his “plan.” Rick’s eyes targeted your every move as you, this time successfully, propped yourself up and off the bed, bending down to grab your pants which were sprawled out next to your feet. 

💋

“What were you gonna talk to me about, y’know….if I ended up showing up earlier?” You flipped the pant legs so that they were no longer inside out.

“I was gonna do this—” Your heart quickened as he neared you rapidly, his arms finding themselves exploring your body and causing goosebumps to multiply across your vulnerable skin. He dexterously greeted his lips to yours, catching you by surprise. The man was quick with it. 

You melted into the kiss while his hands continued to trace your curves, eliciting longing whimpers from your throat. You craved his touch.

Breaking away from the kiss, the Sergeant gave you no time to protest, spinning you around so that your back was facing him. Taking your jaw prisoner in the tight clutch of his hand, his hot breath fanned against your ear, making the hairs on the back of your neck come alive. “Originally I was going to fuck you gently, make you relax from your big day—” His hand slid to the middle of your back and he forcefully bent you over on the bed, scoring a small grunt from you. He took your pulled back hair into his hand and with a tantalizing tug of it, he pushed his clothed hips against your bare ass. “But now I’m not gonna be so easy on you, because you decided to go and put yourself in danger. Well, I’m gonna have to punish you instead of reporting you, hm? For your own sake…” 

Your heat practically leaked through your panties and down the inner part of your thighs. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, you loved when he was rough with you. It stirred you up with the perfect concoction of salaciousness and angst.

Still, your alacrity temporarily repressed your aroused state and you barked back at him, “All I want is to see my son…you have no goddamn right to take that from me, Rick,” you cried, with your trembling hands supporting your upper body as he gripped your hips.

Rick delivered a firm slap to your ass cheek, then promptly straightened you up and turned you around to meet his sifting stare. You gulped, feeling submissive under his touch. You watched the way he contorted his face in vexation and you abruptly felt overpowered by him.

“In case you’ve forgotten you are under my command, and if you disobey me I have every right to correct you where I see fit,” he eyed your pout, huffing, “and I fucking told you already – you have to be patient, it’s gonna take a while.”

The hope you had was dwindling slowly, even though you really wanted to trust him. It almost felt like putting your full trust in him was equivalent to playing with fire. You couldn’t tell the difference between the two anymore. But ultimately Rick was right, you were under his command and the very least you could do at this moment was take his word.

His leer intensified. “Get on your knees.”

You bit the inside of your cheek and felt the command jolt through your body with a cogent nudge. You conformed to his request and scrunched your face in slight discomfort from your bruised knee making contact with the floor, but it was still tolerable. With urgency he unbuckled his belt and wasted no time in freeing his thick, throbbing length. The sight of his cock was not something foreign, as you’d slept with him many times; but the way he was so much more ambitious in getting his cock inside your mouth and feeling you gag around him, made you squirm.

The restless man bucked his hips forward, enjoying the way your soft pouty lips hugged his shaft so magnificently. You moaned softly, the vibration inciting a groan from Rick as he grabbed at your hair. “Gotta do more than tha’. I know you know how to be a good slut f’me.”

You took his whole length in your throat, feeling spit drip down your chin as you choked. You started to bob your head back and forth, becoming accustomed to the size of his dick and how it collided with the back of your throat incessantly. He took it upon himself to grasp your head and guide you up and down as his hips pushed against your needy mouth. Your tongue traced the veins that protruded across his length, as your head quickened its pace. His grunts echoed in your ears and you prepared for his sweet release when you apperceived the twitch of his cock against your tongue. 

“Fuck, yes…good slut,” Rick sung out as he thrusted thrice more, shooting his thick warm seed down your throat and riding out the remainder of his orgasm. He pulled out and stared intently at your lips licking up the remnants of his juices while panting. His hand patted your head in approval.

“You think you deserve to cum tonight?” He taunted, his hold on your hair taut.

You didn’t respond, but instead observed the way his muscles flexed when he lifted his shirt off his back, and how he flattened his hair back with the palm of his hand. You were getting wetter by the second, shifting your thighs in anticipation.

You stood up, tracing your hand over his bicep and fluttering your lashes at him enticingly. He smirked, recognizing that look to be your calling for him to fuck your brains out. Your hands reached down to lift your own shirt off, but he swatted them away in protest, throwing the shirt across the room hastily. All you desired was for him to make love to you, to comfort you and promise you that everything was going to work out, and frankly your sore muscles from training could use as much appreciation as they could obtain. But love-making wasn’t on the agenda for tonight.

Rick flopped you onto the bed, and effortlessly your panties were torn off and thrown next to your shirt. He kneaded your tits with his hand then bent over top of you to hungrily kiss your lips. Your fidgety hands stretched up to tussle through his hair but he broke from the kiss to pin both your hands above your head, rousing a dissatisfied whimper from you. The carnal man bent down diligently to grab his belt and release your hands for a moment, before grabbing your wrists and securing the belt around them.

Bondage wasn’t necessarily unfamiliar to you but you had never expected Rick to ever want to partake in it with you. Nonetheless, your core ached further for his touch. His hand went back to pinching your sensitive nipples, while keeping his ferocious eyes locked onto yours, and lowering his head down to your throbbing heat. The lewd mewls escaping your parted lips sent Rick into a frenzy. You bucked your hips up in an attempt to get him to do something, to give your desperate parts the treatment you longed for, except he just remained concentrated on the way you jerked and crumbled beneath him – he wasn’t even touching you anymore, and yet he had you folding already. How pathetic you looked.

“Rick, please do something!” Your pleas left him unphased. The only thought in his mind at that moment was how rough he was eventually going to fuck you. 

Finally, his finger swiped up your soaking folds and came into contact with your swollen clit, giving it a soft pinch, stimulating a ribald whimper from you and inducing your back to arch off the bed. “What d’you want, sweetheart?” His husky tone intimidated you.

“Need you, please. ‘M lonely,” You sniffed, overworked from all the teasing. He cooed in a mocking manner, and with two fingers he plunged into you, sending you into the clouds. 

“This sweet pussy needs attention, dun’it?” He curled his fingers upward, activating that sweet spot inside your squelching sex. With his thumb he circled around your sensitive bud, accelerating the speed of his thick fingers inside your tight, wet hole. Bliss clouded over you, and your head lulled to the side.

Rick hissed, dissenting your lack of eye contact. He yanked his fingers out all the way, giving a slight tap to your voracious cunt.

“Nuh-uh, eyes on me.” The glazed-over look you gave him was enough for him to give in and slide his digits back into your heat, this time being merciless by the way he finger fucked you with racking momentum. 

Your walls clenched rhythmically around his fingers, legs syncing with the rhythm of your swirling hips. Rick sensed your orgasm approaching – he ascertained that you didn't get to reach its peak by ceasing his thumb's labor and plucking his drenched digits out of your weeping center.

Your sensual clamors didn't go unnoticed; instead he hushed you, and bringing his mouth near your ear he rasped, "I decided that you don't get to cum yet. Not till I feel like it."

Rick really loved tossing you around, especially tonight. He arose, untying the belt around your wrists – almost as if he was showing mercy, but that thought was surpassed as he effortlessly flipped you around so your bandaged hands were gripping desperately onto the sheets, as if that'd prevent you from losing your grip on reality from what was about to go down.

Your begging hole cried for his further attention, causing you to become more agitated by the second. That is, until you felt his hard cock slap against your ass cheek, and his hips striking the back of your shaking thighs. The grumpy commander pressed his leather-sling gloved fist slightly against your upper neck, just enough pressure to ensure you stayed where he wanted you. You didn't plan on leaving, though – not until he fucked you to your heart's content.

He could take a picture right now, the way your ass pushed against his solid member so hysterically, as if your pussy lived to be stuffed by his cock. In that moment, it did. Rick grabbed his cock and lined it up with your welcoming entrance, collecting the condensation on his tip.

"God, just fuck me–"

One rigid thrust was all it took for you to fully engulf him. Your eyes rolled to the ceiling, stars eclipsing your vision while his thrust followed another one, this time much deeper.

Your whines bounced off the pale room's walls, alerting Rick, who hushed you with a growl, "Shutch'er mouth, the whole building's gonna hear ya."

A third thrust ensued, with the sound of his pelvic bone smacking against your backside and the echoing of your sodden cunt being governed by his greedy shaft. The wet squishy insides of your walls hugged Rick so magnetically, he almost gave in right there.

His pace picked up with each ram of his hips, and his assault to your clit. Your grip on the sheets tightened, bandages likely slipping off but that wasn't a concern. Shy whimpers were trapped inside your mouth as you gave it your all at keeping your lewd blubbers and cusses at bay. Your soft, muffled cries continued as he pounded into you strenuously and tirelessly.

"You're not gonna try to leave again, not ever." The thumping of his hips on your ass and him fucking you into the mattress was all too much for your brain. "I won't fucking let you."

You felt fuzzy. The dauntless rebel attitude you once had vanished, and now your were a blubbering hot mess under a relentless leader. His bulging biceps flexed as his leather arm continued pushing on your neck, the other hand groping your hip and then going back to flicking your clit as his cock rutted into your core. He fit you like a puzzle piece.

Your walls were pulsating and you sensed your climax approaching quickly. "Oh, fuck, Rick!"

"Don't you even think about it. So help me god, if you do..."

Rick's demands only filled you closer to the brim with pleasure, and you weren't assured how much longer you could hold it. His thrusts became sloppier and sloppier, indicating that he was probably close too.

"Mmmph–" You focused on grasping desperately at the sheets again, trying to fixate on the way the soft fabric felt against your hands and your face which was pushed into the bed.

Rick groaned out, whispering filthy affirmations as his pounding became more jagged and his grunts more urgent. "Wanna fill ya up, but you don'need another baby, not yet."

One last press against your clit and the band finally snapped, your juices releasing all over his cock, and his orgasm causing him to grasp your hips roughly as he used your dripping hole to help him ride out his own orgasm. He pulled out, releasing onto your back with a few strokes of his slippery member.

The bottom half of your body gave in finally, collapsing and being suffocated by the plush mattress. Your eyelids fluttered, struggling to stay open. He truly fucked the energy out of you.

"You gonna try that shit again with me?"

With half-lidded eyes you simpered and muttered, "Not without you."