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jckrabbits · 2 years ago

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A Long Engagement (pt. 1)

Wyll Ravengard x Tav / Arranged marriage AU

Word count: 5,225

Tav stared at the robe laid out across their neatly made bed, its navy color easily drew one’s eye to the embroidered constellation of silver stars stitched along the collar and across the sleeve cuffs. At the center of each star was a small white gemstone, twinkling in the soft candlelight. By sight alone, they could tell that it was truly a lovely garment, so subtly intricate and so unlike anything their parents would select.

It made Tav’s stomach twist in a sharp knot because nowadays such an intimate gift could only mean two things:

One: another suitor had come calling.

Two: Tav’s parents liked this one.

Most gifts were left in the reception hall to be personally hand delivered to an impassive Tav, and it always took everything in them to not look completely disgusted or bored.

But today’s gift was terrifying because it was grand and only grew lovelier the longer they admired it.

Swallowing thickly around the tight collar of anxiety, Tav finally dared to take a step closer and ran a careful finger along the constellations. Quickly, they were drawn towards a certain diagonal line of stars, the third of which was flanked by two smaller stars and created the shape of a dagger. Jassa’s Dagger.

Precious few knew this, but that was their favorite constellation. Was it also one of the few they could identify with ease? Yes. But that didn’t lessen their excitement. Whenever they found themself beneath the night’s dark blanket, Tav always looked for the dagger first.

From behind them, Tav could hear their bedroom door quickly open and close. Their hand flew to their bathrobe, clutching the collar close to hide away their once exposed chest.

“What are you doing just standing about, dear? Supper is nearly finished, and you should’ve been out of the bath ages ago! Please don’t tell me you were composing ballads in the tub again, you really ought to take more breaks from songwriting, it’s becoming an obsession-”

“Who sent this?” Tav asked, glancing behind to find their mother and her handmaiden, Estella approaching. “It’s a bold gift…”

“As bold as tonight’s guests. You should wear it, I believe it’ll most please them to see you sporting the beautiful robe.” Mother’s delight emanated from her, from the twinkle in her eyes to the hop in her step.

“Mother-“

“Don’t you agree, Estella?” Mother suddenly asked, cutting Tav off.

“Yes, ma’am,” the handmaiden nodded, she was just as eager as her lady if the look in her eye was to be trusted. Estella had always adored dressing Tav up, and delighted in any given reason to do so. Today was no exception. “If I may add, it would pair nicely with the young saer’s satin slippers and the silver chain belt Master Agustin gifted them just a tenday ago.”

“That’s a wonderful idea. My husband does so love spoiling Tav with the finest accessories.”

“Let me rephrase, mother,” Tav huffed. “What is the name of tonight’s most generous guest?”

But no answer came, not immediately. Mother’s smile remained as level as usual, reaching out to their child just to smooth the wrinkle from their brow.

“Must you always be so scrupulous, my pride and joy? Nobody would think less of you for just enjoying the gifts lavished upon you from time to time. Nothing pleases the eye so much as a pretty flower in full bloom, I daresay it’s even good for the heart,” she told them.

“Must you be so vexing?” they grumbled, begrudgingly accepting the powder blue tunic and a pair of black trousers from Estella.

“You will thank me for this someday,” Mother cooly replied as she turned to where Tav kept their jewelry box, more interested in finding the right gems for her child to wear tonight than fight the same old argument over again.

Tav ducked behind the folding screen to change into their clothes. Future spouse or not, Tav didn’t think it appropriate to greet their guests in nothing but their undergarments.

“You know the Beartails just handed their child away to the first bidder. Some…” Mother paused and her face scrunched as she waved her hand, likely thinking of a polite way to say ‘ass-hat’. “Some precocious cartographer, I believe. He teaches at an academy to actually make ends meet. You should be so glad your father cares for your comfort that he’d never settle for such a low earner.”

Personally, a cartographer seemed a fine career to Tav. Had they had the freedom to do so, they would’ve loved exploring the lands and drawing maps with nothing but their own skills and the silver lady, Selune, as their guide.

“A cartographer is not a stable career,” their mother said with such sharpness that it was almost as if she could read Tav’s very own thoughts.

“I didn’t even say anything!” They snapped back with a roll of their eyes, rounding the privacy screen.

“Would you like to fix your tone for me, Tavana?” Her cold and even voice made Tav stiffen. Their gaze dropped to the ground at their feet, not daring to look at her as she continued. “I think you’ll be far happier if you had a better attitude and were more kind to your parents who just want the best for you. Imagine being grateful for having people who care about you, wouldn’t that be nice?”

A heavy, oppressive silence filled the bedchamber as mother waited for Tav to answer her. But first they had to swallow the lump in their throat, neatly tucking away the ugliness that quelled within them. The unthinkable thoughts could not surface now.

“I’m sorry, mother.” Tav finally said. They didn’t want to be ungrateful. And mother was right, they didn’t have to hold off on promising Tav’s hand to anyone. It was an act of their love that they sent away any of the suitors who were too old or capricious, allowing Tav to even say no so long as they met their would-be spouse at least once and tried.

There were families who did not mind who their children wed so long as their coin purse was heavy or their reputation gilded enough. To marry for love was a rarity, it was a privilege that nobility sacrificed for the greater good of society - their allegiances had to be made with the politics of the world in mind. Tav’s tutor had done well to impart this knowledge upon Tav constantly throughout the years. In turn, it was their duty to weigh all the pros and cons of each suitor and settle with someone who came close to their most important ideals.

“I forgot myself,” they quietly added.

With a huge sigh, mother pulled Tav close enough to put the selected diamond earrings on for them. And then she took a moment to examine her child’s face. “You are my pride and joy, my little gem. I take no pleasure in pushing you so hard, you know this. But your father and I want to know you are well taken care of, and this is a good opportunity.”

“I do, I know,” they quickly assured. “You and father do me a great kindness, I shouldn’t react so hastily.”

“Good. Now be a good child and let Estella help you finish dressing. You must look good for our guests tonight,” mother paused thoughtfully, taking Tav’s chin in her hand, “for the Ravengards.”

She took only a moment to revel in the gobsmacked expression on Tav’s face, smugly grinning at them before she swept out of the room to resume her duties as hostess.

While still processing this information, Estella slipped the robe on Tav, adjusting the collar so it would sit properly and better show off the embroidery.

“Is it true, Estella?” They asked. “Is it really the Ravengards?”

The amused smile on the handmaiden’s face was all the answer they needed.

Of all the houses Tav would have guessed, the Ravengards were not within the first seven they would have thought of. That wasn’t a slight upon them, it was only that they were still new to high society. The family conformed in some ways, and took liberties where they pleased.

On the rare occasions Tav had been in the same room as the patriarch, Grand Duke Ulder Ravengard had an air of stern propriety and intimidated them with just a passing glance. From his bones to his armor, the man was a warrior and leader tried true. Tav never would have guessed he, nor his son, would have interest in building alliances this way, nor such fine taste in garments. It just didn’t seem the sort of thing they would have put much thought to.

But perhaps the patriarch’s work with the Flaming Fist and later as a duke had brought him into acquaintance with a dressmaker who did care more than enough for everyone, because this robe was truly a work of wonders.

While cotton was an accessible fabric for everyone regardless of their wealth status, the cotton of this robe was so incredibly soft. It had been woven with such great care that Tav found it just as pretty as silk, but thankfully more breathable - they appreciated the fact their body heat could escape and not leave them on the verge of a sweating mess as Estella sat them before the vanity table and fixed their hair and makeup.

If they wanted, they could probably steal away to the training yard and take a few good wacks at a practice dummy to blow off a little steam after supper while the adults moved to the parlor. Tav wasn’t dedicated to the blade, but they did enjoy the occasional opportunity to release their pent up frustration and hit something every now and then. So the practicality of the garment was probably what Tav liked best about it if they were honest, thankful for something that didn’t limit their movement and require stillness. Many did not think of such things when ordering clothing for them.

“The young lord… this Wyll. I’m not sure I’ve had the pleasure of meeting him in person, it seems we’ve always just missed one another at social events. I hear he’s good with the blade though,” Tav mused, tilting their head up so Estella could line their eyes with kohl.

“Oh, he’s splendid! A real prodigy if I ever did see one - and I have, mind you. In fact, I saw him in a lower city tournament just months ago.”

“The lower city?” Tav asked, quietly amazed. Their own parents were so strict about letting them wander the lower city streets, there was no way they’d allow them to do that sort of thing. “How old is Wyll again, Estella?”

“He turned ten-and-six but a month ago.”

“So he’s a year younger than I,” they mumbled, brushing their fingers along the small gems at the cuff of their robe in thought. Sixteen years of age and the Ravengard heir was running through the streets like some sort of commoner. How reckless. As the marshal of the Flaming Fist, Tav thought Ulder would understand the dangers of the city best. And yet he allowed his son liberties that Tav’s strictly forbade out of concern for their safety. The mere idea of such a thing made Tav’s stomach twist with… with jealousy.

“Worry not, little gem. With Sir Wyll, you’ll hardly feel that year’s difference. He’s a clever child and already quite tall.” The handmaiden assured, misinterpreting the meaning of Tav’s words. Truthfully, they could hardly care about something like height. No, instead Tav wondered if they agreed to marry this Wyll Ravengard, could they play in the lower city too? Would he permit his spouse to follow him through the crowd, or would Tav only be exchanging one cage for another?

For ages, Tav had dreamt of exploring all the shops they passed on their way to Stormshore Tabernacle. Prayer was the only occasion when their parents would allow them out with only Estella by their side, and so Tav found freedom between incense, devotions, and lyre strings plucked in the name of Oghma himself.

“Careful, you’ll loosen them,” Estella warned, pulling Tav’s hands from fiddling at their finery.

“Right. Sorry, I was lost in my thoughts,” they confessed.

“What kind of thoughts?”

Estella’s question made Tav glance at her in the vanity mirror’s reflection while pushing thoughts of open air and cobblestone streets from their mind for now. Instead, they would speak of something light - something inconsequential and happy.

“Well, like if he’s handsome,” they answered with a coy smile.

An amused look crossed Estella’s face, interrupting her concentration just long enough to chuckle a little bit.

“A subjective matter, but yes. I suppose he is, that’s the common consensus. You’ll have to tell me your thoughts after you greet him.”

“Of course. It’d be nice to have someone to talk about my future husband with,” Tav conceded. The two shared a look, a moment of fleeting camaraderie not as employer and employee, but as two people who enjoyed swooning over the sweetest love songs and the most heartbreakingly doomed romance novels.

“Anytime, little gem. Now smile, we’re all ready!” Estella cheered as she gave one last final brush of iridescent powder to Tav’s cheekbones.

Rising to look at themself in the floor length mirror, Tav glanced at the handmaiden and could see she was quite proud of her work - and thinking of something.

“You’ve truly outdone yourself tonight,” they complimented, waiting to see what had the cogs in her mind turning so ferociously.

“I have, but that robe did most of the heavy lifting if we’re honest. When you have the time, could you perhaps ask Sir Ravengard who the tailor is? I think their work suits you well, we would do well to commission them for more pieces.” Estella said, for she had always had a keen eye for the latest fashions.

“I’m certain mother is already on it,” Tav assured, taking the offered silver chain belt and fastened it at their waist.

“She is most enterprising,” Estella smiled. “Now let us be off, saer.”

Giving the completed look one last gander, Tav quietly smoothed down their robes and then turned from one side to the other. They were, admittedly, quite pleased with their reflection. A flower in full bloom as mother had said. Now, it was off to see the hand that would pluck them if permitted.

“Right.” Withering with a wave of anxiety, Tav drew in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. This was for the best, mother and father would never endanger them.

“We already missed the initial reception, it’d be unseemly if we missed dinner.”

“Late for dinner? Oh my, now that’s a scandal that’ll shake the city itself,” Tav teased, following the handmaiden.

“It would,” Estella soberly agreed. “I pray they pardon your tardiness.”

“In my defense, I shouldn’t have been blindsided with this visit. Had I known, we would’ve had more time to prepare. Hells, I might’ve even been able to plan an impromptu trip out of the city,” Tav chuckled.

“Hush, this is an important matter at hand. I’ll hear nothing about running away, my poor nerves are dreadfully thin as it is,” Estella chided and then frowned when she received a delighted laugh in return.

All gleeful tittering came to a harsh stop when they rounded a corner and found a young man admiring one of the many paintings displayed in the hallway.

“M-Master Ravengard,” Estella stammered, giving a respectful bow of her head.

“Do forgive me for overhearing, but I hear Amn is lovely this time of year,” Ravengard said, slowly turning from the painting with his hands neatly folded together behind his back. His boyish smile faltered for a second as they made eye contact.

Oh. This was mortifying. Tav could not have dreamt a more embarrassing scenario than this, this was a nightmare. They had one objective tonight, and it was so damn simple they couldn’t have messed it up if they tried. All they had to do was charm their suitor and have them coming back, eager more than ever to make Tav their spouse.

And they had messed it up before they had even properly laid eyes upon him. Tav burned hot in embarrassment, bereft of any glee after being caught acting so uncouth.

“Tavana Silverwing?” Sir Wyll Ravengard guessed, eyeing them with an unreadable expression upon his face.

They looked to Estella, but the handmaiden very, very conveniently turned her head in the complete opposite direction at the very same time. The message was loud and clear: ‘you’re on your own, kid!’

“That is I,” they meekly replied finally, bracing for an offended lashing. They would deserve it after all. He’s gifted them a dazzling robe and they repaid his kindness with mockery. “Please, disregard what you heard, I was merely jesting. I truly appreciate the time and effort you’ve spared me, I just… I had no idea I was to expect company tonight and find myself… querulous.”

It was frustrating to be pinned beneath Sir Wyll’s gaze in such a horrible situation. On one hand, they wish he would get the confrontation over with, call them a spoiled brat and tell them he never wished to see them again. They would deserve it, Tav did not deny that. It was logical in the face of not being taken seriously. On the other hand, as this slow passing nightmare lingered, Tav could not stop themself from realizing how unbearably rich and lovely his eyes were. They were nearly the same shade as the dark tourmaline pin upon his lapel, glittering beautifully.

Finally, the young lord opened his mouth and he gave a hearty laugh, his amusement started Tav. But their befuddlement seemed to only egg him on more, which in turn made their body burn hotter.

“I’ve heard that your tongue is more silver than your wings, but to see it at play is a delight in itself,” the young Sir Ravengard chuckled as he watched Tav in all their bashful glory.

“You will have to forgive me for neither confirming nor denying that, sir. I- I’m not in the habit of talking about my tongue’s skill upon first meeting,” they replied with a humble bow, hoping to make him laugh more to salvage his impression of them.

From the quick raise of his eyebrows, he likely hadn’t expected such words to leave the mouth of the precious little gem of the Silverwing house. And yet he laughed, and Tav found he had a wonderful smile. “Apologies, saer. It seems I’ve gotten ahead of myself.”

“You’re forgiven so long as you can find it within yourself to accept my own apologies, Wyll Ravengard; student of the blade and, if my eyes do not deceive me, a connoisseur of the arts.”

“Then bygones are bygones,” he said. “I don’t know if I’d consider myself a connoisseur though, I merely stop and enjoy the flowers as I pass them.”

“And which flower has caught your eye so vehemently that you are out here in the hall while the party is inside?” Tav asked, looking across the wall that held many of their mother’s favorite pieces - an arrangement of ancestral portraits and historical events or landscapes.

“You.” Wyll’s voice was so soft, so painstakingly tender as he looked at the large family portrait. A confusing emotion nestled in Tav’s chest as they tried to discern his intentions and he continued. “I’ve admired your music for so long, but I don’t think I’ve ever been able to get a good look at the musician who can pluck so sweetly at the lyre that even the songbirds stop to listen. It’s nice to put a face to the melody.”

“You’ve heard me play?” It was the only thing they could think to ask in the midst of pure surprise.

“A few times. I’ve always wanted to come pay compliments to you whenever we were at the same social events, but you were always gone by the time I could peel myself away from the dancefloor.”

“Ah, yes. I’m not much for staying too late at such events,” they admitted. As much as they would love to participate in festivities, mother had them on a strict beauty regimen that included a full night’s rest. And Tav did not care for all the leering, the attention paid to them was so hungry at such events.

“Then allow me to compliment you now,” he said, pulling a flower from himself.

“Were you holding that the whole time?”

“Yes. I thought I’d give it to you when we first met, but then…” he slowly trailed off and Tav could feel their face burn.

“You overheard me talking about escape plans,” they groaned as they pressed their palms to their cheeks.

“I did mean what I said about Amn though,” he grinned.

“Ha. Ha. I’ll have you know I didn’t think you were just around the corner when I made that joke,” they whined.

“I suppose I have no choice but to believe you,” he continued to tease.

Suddenly, a roar of laughter came from further down the hall - the dining room. Tav could just faintly hear their father regaling a story from his old days, back when he sailed the sea and visited distant lands, trading goods and outwitting bad guys.

When Tav was still small, they had delighted in such tales, eagerly begging to hear them just before bedtime.

That felt like a lifetime ago.

“Your father has a real knack for storytelling, I don’t think I have ever been painted a more vivid picture. He makes one feel like they’re there on the journey with him. Is your home always this warm and cheerful?” Wyll asked, intending to compliment but must realize he hit a sore spot from the little furrow of Tav’s brow.

“It used to be…” they mumbled, but then quickly cleared their throat. “It’s no matter though, father is often away on business. Sacrifice begets privilege, and what matters most is that I know he loves me.” Whether their father liked them was a whole separate issue.

“That’s true,” Wyll nodded. “It’s a bit like me and my father. Sometimes he brings me to work with him, but sometimes he’s quite busy and I don’t see him for days on end.”

“Between the Fist and his ducal duties, I’m quite amazed he’s even found time for something like, well, this.”

Wyll chuckled with deep amusement. “That would be Counselor Florrick’s doing.”

“Ah. She is a woman with the most discerning eye.”

Of course Florrick would see the appeal of engaging Wyll and Tav together. The Silverwing family had a fair few merchants in their pocket and the respect of more old-fashioned houses. What sort of political move were they hoping to make? And how did it align with father’s interests? Tav tucked the query aside to mull over later when they had a moment’s peace for themself. For now it was important to play along with what they could infer their parents wanted from them: ensnare Wyll Ravengard’s attention, and seriously consider his hand in marriage.

“When Florrick first suggested this arrangement, I confess I wasn’t so sure what to think. But this… this has been both enlightening and a delight I will not soon forget. Do all courtings all begin like this?”

That amused Tav, making them quickly hide their mouth behind their hand when they couldn’t help but snort.

“Please, most first meetings with admirers bore me to tears. I shouldn’t say this, but the last admirer who came calling before you was so in love with the sound of their own voice, it made me want to swan dive into the ocean and never return,” they told him, making them both laugh.

“Sounds like they missed out on a lovely discussion, and I pity them for it.”

Tav paused then, surprised not by his compliment but his sincerity. It was laid out so plainly across his face and not hidden behind the usual snark or double entendres that Tav typically had to navigate through.

“You flatter me, sir-”

“Wyll. Just Wyll, please.”

“Oh. I-I couldn’t possibly, we’ve only just met,” Tav flustered between the beautiful robe and the idea of using his first name so soon. “It wouldn’t be proper, if someone overheard us-”

“What about in secret then, when it’s just us,” he suggested in a whisper, just low enough for them to hear. His warm breath against their ear made Tav smile despite themself.

“Very well then… Wyll.” His name slipped so slow and sweet from their mouth like honey.

“Thank you, Tavana.”

“Just Tav, please. I’m only Tavana when I’m in trouble and getting a scolding.”

“I’m sure we could find a little trouble if you’d like. Maybe a cliffside to practice our swan dives?”

Tav smiled back at him, “I would’ve taken you up on that offer last month. Tonight I’m quite keen to stop and admire the flowers.”

With a small step closer to him, Tav’s fingers ghosted over Wyll’s as they carefully plucked the flower from his hand. Somehow, they felt more flattered by this single bloom than any large bouquet previous suitors had pushed into their hands. At first glance, it was a humble offering. At second glance, it was as thoughtful as the robe he had gifted them.

“How did you manage to get such a beautiful flower from Lady Marie’s garden?” They asked. The old woman was so protective of her rare and exotic flowers, Tav wouldn’t have believed this gifted bloom came from her. But there was nowhere else in the city that could produce such a rare species as this. They knew this much because she had just been boasting about it at last week’s tea party she hosted to show them off.

“It’s not a very interesting story,” but his eyes beget a hint of mischief. “More importantly, your hands pluck only the finest and most perfect notes, I knew the same should be said of the petals that may find themselves between your fingers.”

“You… are an astoundingly good sweet-talker,” they chuckled as they rolled the stem between their fingers. “I fear my tongue is nothing but tin in comparison to yours.”

“If I recall correctly, it’s too early to be comparing tongues, Tav.”

If Wyll was truly like this all the time, so witty and charming, this was perhaps the best hope Tav had in regards to marriage for the longer they spoke with him, the fewer cons they found to his proposal. They didn’t need love at first sight, but to have his friendship? His good opinion? That could sustain Tav even better than what the bard songs promised.

“Wyll? How- please, pardon my curtness, but how do you feel about courting me?” Tav asked as they hand fiddled with an inlaid gem at their cuff, unable to phrase it more delicately. “Is this something you also want? Or is this just a formality, a favor for your father or Counselor Florrick?”

Wyll wasn’t expecting that, his smile twisted in confusion. “Do you not believe in my sincerity?”

“No, I do. But I also understand being willing to compromise for duty, to make the best of a situation. Courtship is… it’s more than flirty banter, it’s a serious matter to me and I want us to be on the same page.”

He quietly nodded, turning their words over in his head for a moment.

“I’ll speak clearly then. I never envisioned myself taking part in an arranged marriage, I have always envisioned taking a spouse out of love and still wish to do so. But from the first moment I heard your music, my heart was yours. And, well, I couldn’t bear to see you engaged to someone else before I could even confess my admiration.

“In a way, I’m even thankful this arrangement allowed me to come to you with all my intentions laid bare: I wish to get to know you, to better understand my feelings for you. So, I hope you don’t mind the idea of a long engagement… should we proceed together.”

There is a moment of silence as it sunk in that they were truly the precipice of forever. And his honesty deserved honesty in return.

“I would love that, a long engagement would be perfect. I just had to ask because I only want this if you do too. I couldn’t bear to be to you what others have been to me, you wouldn’t deserve that.” And in Tav’s experience, a forced connection could only ever become a target of misery and contempt.

He seemed to understand as his brow unfurrowed. “Tav…”

“I won’t lie to you and say I really believe in love at first sight, Wyll. That is a privilege I could never afford, that’s my sacrifice for my family. But, I can confidently tell you that I feel there is something worth tending to here. But beyond the good we could do together, I only want it if you want it too. Not your father, not my parents. You.”

“I do, I want this,” he assured and reached for them. “Not just for duty, but for myself.”

“And you understand the seriousness of this? People will be watching us, so it will be my duty to protect your honor as you protect mine.”

“Even if we weren’t courting, I could never allow someone to besmirch you,” he told them - a sentiment Tav had just been thinking to themself about Wyll. “I truly want to take my time winning your hand until the day our hearts know there will never be another for us.”

Appeased with his answers, Tav permitted him to take their hand. His palm was rough and calloused and that of someone unafraid of hard work - dedication. They felt proud that they were only nominally flustered when he kissed their bare knuckles.

“Well. I believe we have good news to tell our parents,” Tav said, giving his hand an affectionate squeeze before they let go, fingertips slowly sliding away from his and yet neither really moved.

Tav found themself lost in his eyes, thinking about the fact Wyll’s friendship was the greatest gift they had ever received, even better than the lovely robe. Sure, they only had it for mere minutes, and yet it had steadied Tav in ways no gold or art or jewelry could.

“Shall we head in then, Tav?” Wyll extended his arm out for them to take, ready to escort them in. And who were they to deny him? They linked their arm over his and took a deep breath, letting the reality of the moment sink in.

Come morrow, news of their courtship would make the rounds through society. The race for Tav’s hand would come to a wonderful halt, and they would have more time to focus intently upon that which they wanted. Their music, their daily trek for prayer, and - as it turned out - Wyll Ravengard.

Whatever their parents had planned would come later, a discussion for future Tav to deal with. Tonight they simply wanted to enjoy being treated like an equal and basking in Wyll’s beauty, his joy and laughter.

#wyll ravengard x tav #bg3 fic #i havent written fic in so long #so apologies but also all of my gratitude for reading this 💕

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