#gross...

[backsteps]

i wanna... do somethin

but i dunno what, and

well i just don't even have the head on me to think of anythin honestly

[transgender-catboy]

ate a vanilla pudding and it tasted exactly like a marshmallow roasted over a lighter

[coffee-dere]

I'm really hungry tbh but the idea of eating anything right now makes me feel sick

[the-great-hacklord-shedletsky]

Would you like a jar of my teeth

-Creature anon

"...what a strange offer... quite... creepy..." The Hacklord muttered a bit disgusted as the anon appeared out of no where. He just wanted to get to his training grounds damn it!

"you might put such... a-" He paused unsure of what to call this gift, "pleasant gift in the Botanny room... but please. Do not offer such things again."

He felt like he might throw up.

'note to self', he thinks, 'never accept such gifts again, instead kill the offender and use necormancy to bring forth a new maid or butler.'

[yuribait]

one of my coworkers has again attempted to deceive me by putting skittles and m+ms in the same tray

[k20spock]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN LOAF OF BREAD **IN YOUR ROOM SOMEWHERE**

friend gave me a loaf of bread as a gift. i thanked her and promptly forgot about it and it gets lost in the coating of random objects across my floor. circa three weeks later i remember. time was not kind. as for i stashed it in my room instead of. anywhere else. i could not tell you.

[nemorialex]

Tried some "Liquid Courage" (Magic, not Alcohol) and just felt overwhelming dread, so... It did something, alright!

[latetothegames]

[meowthiroth]

bored now. here's some old art of my fursona

[creepymutelilbugger]

op turned reblogs off but this post must live. it must live and spread malignantly .

[carniekisses]

Your dislike or phobia for certain animals never outweights the animal's right to exist and live, i keep running into this behavior and i don't know why some folks never got to learn that. Who do you think you are

[fipindustries]

i almost never do vent art, much less post it but man, i have been feeling bummed out recently

[teaboot]

Me, watching my kitten hold still for a suspiciously long time: Ollie, are you peeing on my floor?

Ollie: Not

Me: Are you sure?

Ollie, grunting through time and space to push out a chocolate mcmuffin wider than he is tall: Not

[psalacanthea]

to all my period-having buds in the US, make sure you delete that shit

[eraserbread]

there's something in the air around you... your husband, nanami, notices it immediately ✧

→ pregnant!reader, panty-sniffer nanami, fingering, mentions of oral, suggestive content

perhaps it's a new perfume, but you never switched from the one he picked out. you've used the same detergent since you were a teenager and match body wash with him.

there hasn't been a change in your lifestyle at all. kento swears he's not crazy...

then, he thinks he might actually be because he's standing in front of the washer with your black silk panties pressed to his nose. you just took them off this morning, so your smell is fresh—mouthwatering—yet different—a good difference.

"ken, i've been dreaming about milk bread from that bakery in-" you're stepping into the room, arms crossed around your traditional robe. you took off your clothes to shower, and now he's nose-deep. "...what are you doing?"

"oh." he replies haphazardly, pretending like he didn't just get caught sniffing your panties. he tosses them in with the rest of the clothes. "yes, dear. milk bread sounds lovely. you know, they do sandwiches too-

"why were you... wait, you're sniffing my panties? are you okay?"

"oh," he repeats, looking down to the contained mess of dark clothes in the drum. "I know... it's odd... i was just wondering why your pheromones have been dipping recently." he turns to you, shutting the washer and leaning against the waist-height appliance. "have you been taking any new medications? no, right? i would know?"

you swallow silence, knowing exactly what he was sensing... and silly you, you know your husband is mystic and observational. you should really tell him about that positive pregnancy test you have hiding in the wardrobe.

now is not that time. you shake your head. "no..."

so, he nods you over. "come here, now. i've been stewing over the matter for a few days."

kento sits you on top of the purring washing machine after he turns it on, giving you a passing kiss as you settle. You still get so flustered with him, and it's heightened right now—you just caught him with a noseful of your most private garments, taking it in like it was flora.

"well, firstly i thought it might've been a new bodywash... but we share."

"mhm." you nod, lips pressing together as he pushes your legs open. under the robe you're completely naked, but the shadow keeps you decent. "'s not the bodywash."

"yes. then, i figured... well, it's more likely to be an internal change. i can smell it waft when you walk by."

"are you saying i stink?"

his eyes get dark. he's staring right into your soul. "no."

you're purring - a steady engine coming to life within you that matches the tremors of the wash cycle. between your thighs, he reaches for your familiar cunt, knowing right where to reach, where he should bypass, and the entirety of your shape. instead of teasing your clit, getting you ready for further stimulation, he slides his thick middle finger inside of you, buried to the hilt.

you take a breath, he cocks an eyebrow. "me smelling you like that... it didn't make you uncomfortable, did it?"

you're shaking your head immediately, reaching a hand to plant on his big, homey shoulder. he's hunching pretty far to get as close as possible, nose trailing over yours when he whispers.

"i don't... i don't even know what that means—mhmf." you squeeze your eyes shut, body twisting as he slips his pointer finger ring-deep inside of you. the shiny metal shocks your soul, twisting at your entrance as his digits stretch you sensually.

then, he chuckles. actually—real, rare. "good. i love you. all of you." he twists his fingers and pulls them out, drinking up your flustered gasps as he brings the glistening pair to his nose, taking a long sniff.

you're reacting like a fish out of water, opening and closing your lips as you try to make sense of it all. before two thoughts can connect, he's dragging those damp fingers to his lips, staring at you hotly as he takes them in his mouth.

he settles on a deep, throaty. "mmm..." cheeks hollowing around them like your taste is his favorite meal. "you're sweeter, too."