#he/him in a distinctly nonbinary way . you feel?

[morganpdf]

sorry if this is intrusive. long time follower just very slow... i was under the impression you were t4t mlm (related to you with that). are you a lesbian now?

hey! really quick i do just wanna put out there that youre right abt it being intrusive but i am nothing if not a chronic oversharer on the internet so i'm abt to do what i do best<3 and overshare<3 i'm ALSO gonna give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're asking this from a genuine place & are not just looking to start shit or anything etc but anonymously asking for more details on people's gender/sexuality is Usually unwelcome & uncomfortable

ANYWAYS. i am t4t but have never been strictly mlm/dont think ive ever said i'm mlm? and am also pretty constantly posting abt women so dsvbfghdsv i'm defs curious how that came across 😭😭😭 i don't claim the lesbian label bc im not solely attracted 2 women (just mostly) etc BUT as far as gender goes im just (shrug emoji) transmasc I've been actively bouncing between binary trans guy & nonbinary since highschool and rn nonbinary has been feeling way more comfortable etc. identities shift & change etc honestly im personally most comfortable saying im just p much queer gender/sexuality wise as a catchall & to cover my bases bc i dont really have strong feelings towards any sexuality labels for myself & gender is and always has been goofysilly for me so! yeagh

been toying around w butch lately tho bc its comfortable & i definitely feel like there are aspects of my identity that are still very much Connected 2 my 'sapphic roots' or w/e in a way that isn't consistent w a binary gender 4 me personally (gender & sexuality are very intertwined for me in ways they might not be for other people etc etc etc)

tldr yes im t4t . no im not a lesbian but i believe their beliefs

also im getting the distinct vibe that you are a younger trans guy looking for role models (not a dig!) and while i Get that & know that specific kind of solidarity is Good & Feels Good - remember that solidarity can be found with all our lgbtq+ siblings in the community! anyways i will get off my soapbox now bc i need 2 figure out dinner dghfvsd

[mxnox]

I have a story about my transness to tell!!!

I can distinctly remember being a very small child and thinking “I’m a girl. But sometimes I feel like a boy too” and then following that up with “but I have to keep it secret. I’ll sound weird.” For context I grew up in an unsafe household and was constantly hearing homophobic and transphobic crap. What I did and what I said was heavily scrutinized in all categories not just to avoid looking and acting gay.

Then I got to middle school and began seriously being like “okay, I’m definitely a girl…except I also have a boy inside my heart too. I feel like two different people in one body” I didn’t have any words for how to express that differently. I felt split down the middle where the lines between my girl-ness and boy-ness blurred heavily. I still kept that hidden (or so I thought. Looking back on it it was glaringly obvious) but I also started going to my state pride festival with my best friend then too. We’d be in the parade, carrying the flag at the front, or walking with a float. It was so much fun.

Fast forward to high school and i met the first person id ever heard the word “trans” from. It used pronouns I didn’t get and introduced the concept of nonbinary to me though I didn’t understand it at all. It invited me to our school’s after school pride group and even though I felt extremely uncomfortable I kept going. Looking back I’m sure it was the intimate setting and being forced to confront myself before I was ready for it that made me feel so uneasy. I was in extreme denial and kept telling everyone I was cis and straight. (Everyone was like really???? Should have been my first clue🙄🙄). I finally confided in an at-the-time friend about how I felt I had a girl and also a boy inside me (but not in a trans way obviously). He ran with it and would often refer to me using both pronouns(over text only) which made me incredibly happy. He was the first person to suggest I try dressing up as a boy with binding and everything. I agreed and had to lie to my dad in order to get him to buy me ace bandages. I didn’t know at the time that it was super unsafe to bind using bandages so I went ahead and tried my best. Met up with my friend and “pretended” I was my boy self all afternoon. It felt amazing.

I graduated and thought “oh I should leave all that girl/boy stuff behind. It’s childish play pretend and I needed to grow up”. Then I went to the pride festival again as an adult and again faced the “oh when did you come out? :D” questions from my coworkers and I was immediately answering “oh no I’ve never come out, I’m straight and cis” and they’d respond with “hmmmmm 🤔” pretty much. Finally it was a random day, a year after graduating and it hit me like a truck. My brain was like “IM A BOY AND ALSO A GIRL” and then I was like “oh my god. I think I’m trans. I think I actually am a boy and a girl.” And that was all she wrote.

It was like the flood gates opened and all the repressed feelings I’d had just came out. I realized I was nonbinary, that I was ace, that I was aro, that I was pan, that everything I thought I had to keep secret and hidden because I’d be looked at weird, or wrong was my true self. That I’m not broken and I truly do exist and that it’s okay for me to be here and who I am. I grieved over having wasted all my childhood stressing over it and suppressing who I was. I wished I’d had the language and support to have been able to realize it sooner. I wouldn’t have spent so many hours agonizing over my identity growing up.

Now I have a child of my own. I’m teaching them how to be their true self whatever that may be. And they’re proud of who I am. It almost made me cry the first time they told me “mama I’m a boy and a girl!” When they were like five years old. It was no big deal to them then and nor is it now. They’ve never wavered in themself and it makes me happy to know they’re able to live like that.

Happy Pride 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

[catboybiologist]

Interesting personal thoughts about gender I've been having recently.

I've been feeling very nonbinary recently. But in a very particular way that's distinctly in between man and woman.

Okay. Several times, I've described my experiences as gender as "yes, I was a man, I was a femboy, I'm working towards becoming a woman, I don't feel like one yet, but it's still my goal and working towards it makes me happy." That doesn't track with a lot of people's gender experience, I know. But for me, there is a delineation between what I am and what I want. It's not defined by my physical body, it's defined by an imperceptible number of social, biological, and psychological factors that are constantly changing (including significant changes to the biological factors, since I'm on HRT).

My goal is still transitioning into a woman. I still want to be a woman. I still don't feel like I'm there yet, though. But for the first time.... I really, really don't feel like a man. Something in me "clicked" recently, and I do feel like I've fully left manhood behind. And so, my current identity feels like it's falling in between. I'm passing through a town- some people live there, and I'm just visiting, but it's where I am right now. I know that's coming a lot later than mostly people think it would, especially considering my presence online is essentially fully presenting as a woman.

I know this state is transient. I know it'll be gone. I know I will be a woman eventually. But this is honestly a huge sense of peace for me. Maybe it's "just a phase", but dynamic, changing phases can still be real. And that's what this feels like right now. I told my therapist some of my thoughts on not thinking of myself as a woman until I'm further into my transition, and she warned me that it could be easy to fall into the rut of *never* feeling like you're good enough for it. And this feeling is essentially a confirmation that that's not happening. I'm going somewhere steadily.

Again, pronouns are absolutely whatever. Tbh the language used to refer to me is a fun mix rn. People here tend to use she/her for me. My labmates/professors use he/him for me, my irl queer friends tend to use they/them, and I get my she/her fix here. I've found it to be a good mix. So thank you! But again of course, I'm so used to boymoding that I really don't mind anything.

[ironunderstands]

help I have been afflicted by Boothill brainrot time to share some shitty angst bulletpoints with the class (that I’ll probably turn into a fic later)

I don’t think I have to tag anything specific but be warned there’s probably something bad in here so if you understandably don’t wanna read that then scroll. Expect cyborg related angst (and minor spoilers)

Also I hc Boothill as nonbinary (using he/they and occasionally she) so if you’re wondering about the use of multiple pronouns that’s why, it’s not related to the angst, I just don’t want people to be confused.

-has a sensation of touch on the metal parts of his body, but it’s visibly muted compared to his skin and it drives them nuts

-despises hot/cold temperatures due to how they interact with the metal parts of their body, on especially hot days

-very vulnerable to hacking and it scares the shit out of him (thanks past obsession with Genji for giving me this one, the amount of “Sombra hacks Genji and he has a bad time” stuff I have read is unhealthy, even if she would only do it for the shits and giggles or a mission, a character losing control of their body is unfortunately very compelling please don’t cancel me)

-can’t remember their past life or how he died but still has nightmares of it

-phantom pain is a bitch and her name is Boothill

-won’t be seen as human by most people (even actual people write him this way which is a little weird to me, like I know the Robot/Human tag w Boothill serving as a Robot is probably just for reach, but like, he’s still human, he’s not a robot, he’s a cyborg, idk it’s just a pet peeve of mine)

-has to go to the scientist who made him to get “upgrades” (aka whatever they feel like fucking with this week) against their will

-he can’t remember his old life, but they can remember how their body felt back then and the cyborg one distinctly Doesn’t Feel The Same

-Boothill’s synesthesia beacon doesn’t just prevent Boothill from cursing, it prevents her from saying certain things entirely which makes it very hard for him to express his feelings

-charging induces sleep for them, something which Boothill tries to hide as it could be used against him

-debating between making Boothill unreasonable heavy (because metal) or unreasonably light (because high tech) both scenarios cause problems for him, feel free to torture yourself for as to why

-animals (especially dogs) don’t like them as Boothill doesn’t have as strong a scent nor the flesh of other humans which is why it’s hard for them to trust him, which sucks for Boothill because he loves animals

-doesn’t even know the planet they were originally from or how old he was when he died, Boothill doesn’t even know their birthday, so it ended up becoming the day he was brought back to life against his will

-gets called “it” by people who don’t like cyborgs or people that are non-organic/have nonorganic parts of their body/existence, I also share this for the trailblazer because of their dubious origins, I’d like to believe transphobia isn’t a thing in Star rail because it’s already tiring enough irl and there’s no proof for it unlike other real world problems, so the misgendering happens for other horrible reasons! Horrible reasons that are close to canon considering the whole organic/inorganic war thing depicted by the Sim Uni, I’d imagine a lot of people are still bitter about that (honestly I don’t know the details I was there for the jades) and/or ignorant enough to believe that only fleshy beings have a monopoly on personhood (it/its pronouns are cool but not on people who don’t want to use them!)

-constantly pushes the limits of their body (aka self destructive behavior), I doubt Boothill would be trying to hurt herself but it’s more of a “it will get fixed anyway” kinda thing, any injuries sustained still hurt like a bitch but Boothill forces himself to not care because well “it’s his job and he will get healed anyways” (also it’s implied from their LC that he’s a Galaxy ranger against his will from the whole “never living for themself again” thing, so Boothill probably has to get injured for the job and is just forced to grin and bear it

alright that’s all the angst my sleep deprived brain could cook up for now if I did something wrong or missed a tag pls tell me

[betweenlands]

Interesting. What made them your favourites?

Avid's one of my video favorites because I adore the way he tells stories. He's got a good blend of clean editing and great story pacing, has consistently well-structured lore with foreshadowing that makes it possible to predict twists without it ever feeling like they've been spoiled, and also I just really like hearing him talk about the writing process on streams. That latter part is something I don't see a lot of -- usually players that are more open about their creative process don't put as much thought into MCYT as a storytelling medium, and the players with a ton of artistry and a grasp on how to make it work for them tend to be very reclusive and not really talk much about their process. (Or at the very least, I suck at being able to find that commentary.)

Leon is an incredibly talented video editor -- great at jokes, even better at tension. He's got a knack for setting things up with expert timing and whenever he dips a little into suspense or horror it works great. I know less about his process than I do Avid's, but I also don't need to know as much to see the results. Mark my words, if he decides he wants to then this guy's gonna make The Next Redstoner, and that is a high compliment.

Trog's a really cool character! I will freely admit to being biased towards them initially because woah they dont have any biney thats so poggers, but I also really do like their video presentation style and their little animations are sick as all hell. Plus, I think their character has a lot of fun places you could go in a distinctly eldritch way, and I -- eldritch and nonbinary -- think they're one of the few server admins where it's genuinely more interesting to headcanon them as having additional powers or a background in dark magic.

Fool's someone I've been following since Gilded -- ever since I caused his god and potentially even IRL good luck charm to be named after a Mistborn reference, I've pretty much been locked in lore-wise. I think I especially like his character because he manages to pull off a trope that is really tough to make work in MCYT -- I'm a sucker for a laid-back character that just does not have a fear response, and Fool really does a good job of staying calm and confident without ever totally no-selling plot developments. Super rad, and I'd love to see more of him in videos.

[disastercit]

ok, sex episode commentary, lets go

(camp camp s5 episode 3 spoilers)

-the magazine????

-something does feel distinctly different about the writing and characterizations this season (especially with david), is it a new writing team or just a product of it having been 4 or 5 years since they wrote the last season?

-cj.

-FLOWER SCOUTS!!! but not really :( damn I was hoping to fill out my bingo slot but I don't think this counts

-even the cobwebs have hearts in them 😭

-the three genders: woodscouts, flower scouts, and the delightful jesters at camp campbell

-DAVID WHY ARE YOU USING THE BDSM SKYDIVING MAGAZINE FOR THE SEX ED

-hes suffering so much free him :(

-fucking gen alphas god damnit. this hit so close to home bc my younger cousin is in the 6th grade and this is exactly how she sounds to me 😭

-"they're" just like nerris? nerris nonbinary self discovery arc for realsies???

-nah they're just being gay

-maybe I'm wrong about ereds age? it almost seems like she doesnt even have periods yet, I mean it's possible she does and just has the bare minimum understanding of it but it doesn't really seem that way.

-and then she pretty much immediately gives a huge clue to her age lol. if she's a freshman in high school then she's 14 or 15, which is pretty much what I had guessed.

-david getting called a Beta Cuck in an actual camp camp episode is something I did not see coming

-junior counselor ered???

-gwen you are a modern 21st century woman why are you still reading porno mags 😭 I knew it didn't belong to a camper but I'm surprised I didn't guess it was gwen's just from how freaky the cover was

-also David flipped through that entire magazine and looked at every image in it to place those stickers. I know he has questions

-quartermaster please I'm so tired of adding trees to your bingo square I can't do it anymore

-the preview looks interesting but I really hope it's good, considering how it's probably the last episode of camp camp that will ever be made 😕

bingo squares I've managed to fill from this episode: Mom-Gwen, Qm is a FREAK (AGAIN)

[pentanguine]

Python's 2023 in review

Enjoy me rambling and oversharing in typical long-winded fashion

I am so glad I stumbled into public librarianship. When I graduated I was still so sure I was going to work in an academic library, and it took fate intervening for me to realize that still probably wasn’t right for me. I love the public library combination of working with popular collections (the books actually circulate!?) and helping people with practical problems. It makes me feel useful, and like I’m part of the wider world

Unfortunately I am beset by imposter syndrome. I only graduated three months before I started the position, and I feel underqualified for what I know was a very competitive search. I am definitely the youngest person on my team, and I am so scared of disappointing people. It will be fine

Also unfortunately my commute is still way too long, but my god, I’m in control of it. All I have to do is get on the bus and stay on the bus til my stop. There’s no mucking around with a local shuttle service that can have a wait time of over an hour and has to be precisely timed while you also try to make a train connection…I just get on one bus. Wow. When the weather’s nicer and it’s lighter out, I’m going to try walking home to see if it’s faster

I dated one of my friends for nine months, and that was fun and weird. I really enjoyed just getting to express those feelings for once, but I didn’t like how much space he took up in my life. I’d set aside a night for myself and then he’d say “hey, want to call?” and I’d go “😍YES let me drop everything to hear your voice!”, which was very annoying. I desperately wanted more time to myself, but I was so infatuated I wanted to spend time with him more. I think I’d like to avoid that in the future.

I definitely did not experience Dating and Romance the way most people do, but it’s hard to tell if that’s because I’m somewhere on the ace spectrum, or because that’s just how I am as a person. I do feel like a lot of stuff was unintuitive to me, sort of like I was a robotic anthropology student experimenting with intimacy in order to gain a better understanding of the humans it’s been studying, but I also feel like that about many of types of human interaction, and “being attracted to him” was not where the disconnect was. Over the course of the relationship I kept up a strategy document outlining my goals and took 27 pages of notes, and that’s probably the most relevant fact about how my sexuality functions

I have started eating my burgers with all the toppings! This seems small and meaningless from the outside, but I used to eat every component of my food separately, because I Had To, and it feels really nice to just do things instead of holding myself apart so I can carefully avoid Bad Things which Are Not Right. It feels like relaxing into life like a warm bubble bath.

27 feels distinctly different from 26. Feels a lot like My Late 20s, which feels like Almost 30, which feels like an entirely different stage of life. My knee clicks louder and louder when I go up stairs, and my knee and elbow hurt when the weather changes. I hear my spine making noises a lot.

AAAGHHHH! I am trying to get top surgery this year and I don’t want to talk about it! But also that’s dumb because I want my friends to know about it! Also, reading other people’s reflections about top surgery has been so, so fucking helpful to me over the years, and it would be nice to add to that informal pool of knowledge by periodically sharing stuff. Unfortunately I am deathly allergic to talking about myself on the internet, so I don’t know if I can do it. But it’s a thing that’s happening! I am going to get a referral letter from my therapist, and then I can schedule consultations!

I have no idea what I’m doing with gender. At some point I seem to have stopped identifying as nonbinary, and while I like being called a man but I don’t think I am a man, except for the part where sometimes I wonder if I’m a trans man who just doesn’t want to go on T, except for the part where I feel like a [redacted] who wants to disguise themself as a man. Look, I just live here. 

I have reached a point where she/her pronouns make me uncomfortable, instead of just feeling factually incorrect

I’ve realized that I have as much facial hair as my ex did when he was 3 months on T. I was wildly, desperately jealous of that facial hair at the time. That’s super weird.

I realized I’m thinking of this holiday as a trip to visit my parents, and I can’t wait to get home afterwards. But where is home? All my family still lives in the South, and there is stuff I miss here. All the little things, like the sound of Southern accents all around me and the way all the stores have ceiling fans turned on in the middle of December, and also the stars, and the horizon, and magnolia trees everywhere. But my life is in The City, and I feel at home when I cross the bridge at night and see all the lights against the water. Home is my shitty little apartment with my 12x6 room and sloping floors and my linden tree outside the window.

In general, it’s been a great year for Large Life Things: I graduated with my masters! And I started a great full time job! And I asked out the guy I’d had a crush on for almost four years! And it ended, but not in disaster, and we’re still friends! And I have kicked the ball that will eventually start knocking over dominoes on the way to having top surgery! Exciting cool stuff!

[i-make-my-journey]

hi there!! im not a kemetic, but i do have a few questions about it and i was wondering if you could answer them for me :] (well i essentially only have one question for now but shhh its whatever)

its probably no surprise that there are intersex/hermaphroditic deities in kemeticism. but im curious: how does one (whether it be in the ancient times or modern day) worship them? take for instance Hapi, who is the intersex personification of the flooding of the nike river—he is usually referred to with he/him pronouns, and as a “God” or “Lord” instead of ��Lady” or anything else — arent those pretty masculine terms? so why use them?

to be fair, its probably because the ancient egyptian languages (hieroglyphics, coptic, etc…) just didnt have any neutral terms and was gendered — not that i would know, though. but i still find this subject so fascinating…

sorry if i came for the wrong person for this stuff! i just figured that since you practiced kemeticism that you would know given you have direct relationships to the gods,,,

P.S. i saw your closet shrine and it looks lovely!! i like it immensely!! i think its pretty rare for Pakhet/Pasht to get any recognition be it by kemetics or by people who enjoy the myths so i was pleasantly surprised to see something related to her!!

i hope you have a lovely day/night!!

~🫀🏹

Heya, 🫀🏹 anon! Sorry for the slow response time here, been crazy busy and wanted to actually sit down to try and answer this properly. So thank you for your patience!

And also aaaaaaaaa thank you for the compliment!! My shrine means a lot to me, so that makes my heart feel happy to know that someone else finds it lovely, too! There really isn't much Pakhet to be seen, is there? Which is unfortunate, I'm incredibly fond of Her! I think She's just likely either a bit too specialized or sometimes lumped in with Bast or Sekhmet, so She gets a bit forgotten sadly. But I absolutely adore Her!

I also want to start with a small disclaimer that I am most definitely NOT an expert or scholar, so while I will answer this with the most accurate information I am aware of, an expert/scholar/etc may well say I'm wrong or off the mark! And of course also, other people's experiences may vary! How I worship may be different from someone else, but I'll share my own practices, at least!

So! Here we go! (under a cut, because I ramble)

So, from what I DO know of the ancient language, gendered terms as we understand them in a modern context weren't quite the same. "Male" and "female" certainly existed, but there was a few instances of "sekhet", which was something in between. So, a sort of nonbinary term. It's not one I've seen often used, though I BELIEVE it was used to describe the goddess Nit/Neith at some point, as She is also one of the deities that has both male and female attributes! Likewise, Mut is often depicted as a combination of male and female, with some of Her iconography actually depicted ithyphallic (i.e., with a penis) like the god Min!

Also also, when it comes to gendered terms (from what I understand), there was "male" and then essentially "not male". In our current day, I think most English/American translations simply do male/female for simplicity's sake, but there was a bit more wiggle room in the "not male" category, historically. I'll use my own name as an example, the "Ta-" prefix in "Taswau" was put on there as the gender marker. At the time of naming, I considered myself nonbinary rather than male, thus... "Ta-" to indicate "not male" rather than distinctly female. Were I to rename myself, it would be "Paswau", as that is the male marker but I like my name just fine so I won't change it lol

As for how to worship Them... it depends on what one wants to do in that regard! Hapi, Mut, Neith, and even Anubis are all depicted in genderweird sort of ways. Ultimately, since there wasn't a ton of historical titles like Lord/Lady that were neutral, modern practitioners largely either pick a gendered term to use and deal with that, or use modern language. Some of the epithets/titles that the gods have also do tend to be neutral, so one may just use a title that doesn't have a gendered term (f'ex, Anubis has the epithet of just "the black dog"). So one can use those, of course! Mut/Neith being simply called "creator", rather than "Lady of Creation" gets the title across without gendered terms, etc.

In my own personal practice, Anubis and his female counterpart Anupet occasionally come squished together as one entity, in specific circumstances. I think this is largely due to the specific lens of organized practice that I work through often (i.e., Kemetic Orthodoxy, which squishes the jackals all together for... some reason). While They are otherwise distinctive individuals when I am focused on simply my own relationship with Them, in that specific context, They tend to prefer neutral terms. Separate, Anubis is my spiritual Father and Anupet my spiritual Mother. Together, They are my spiritual Parent, and prefer to be referred to in those neutral terms. So, my own terminology depends on the situation in which I am discussing/addressing Them!

From a spiritual/woo/magical/etc standpoint, the gods come to us in ways we can understand, and that includes in gender presentation. The vague idea is that divinity is all encompassing, so the gods aren't technically our understanding of male/female/other. They're all of them, and some we don't know about, and none at all, all simultaneously. But people can't quite always grasp that complexity - not to mention it can make discussions a bit clunky! - thus we use terms that are more tangible and familiar to us, and that resonate with us.

I hope that answers the question? The TL;DR is "it varies per practitioner, since non-gendered language is nuanced and often times modern".

Thank you for reaching out! I hope you have a wonderful day/night/week! 💜

[vincentvalenfine]

Jushiro, Shinji, and Barret for the headcanon meme!

Juushiro

Sexuality Headcanon: bisexual in a "everyone is hot but the way different genders are hot feels distinctly different depending on the person" way Gender Headcanon: nonconforming masculinity that's very comfortable treading a bigender/genderfluid line from time to time, it's chill A ship I have with said character: ReiJuu A BROTP I have with said character: outside the obvious shunuki, his dynamic with hitsugaya is deeply amusing to me A NOTP I have with said character: i don't think i really care for ukimayu (juumayu? kurouki?? idk i just saw it once and said "hm, not my cup of tea, thanks") A random headcanon: born to fuck hard, forced to be a pillow princess 😞 General Opinion over said character: were it not for the depths of my oc's feelings i wouldn't have been quite so insane about this guy but here we are instead... rei did this to me

Shinji

Sexuality Headcanon: Pan, go nuts show nuts whatever style he's far more interested in the personality than the packaging Gender Headcanon: nonbinary and the pronouns are a you problem A ship I have with said character: if i had to sail a ship here... hiyori probably, it's a classic opposites attract A BROTP I have with said character: him and momo bonding over hatred for aizen is just [pinches fingers] beautiful A NOTP I have with said character: i feel like him and aizen have a bitterly divorced exes vibe so like... sort of an anti-ship in a way? lol A random headcanon: the man's vinyl collection has to be insane... and also very global, I imagine he has things from europe and america as well as japan General Opinion over said character: as a person he would annoy the shit outta me, as a character he fills the role very nicely (i just can't help that i hate the piano teeth look ok)

Barret

Sexuality Headcanon: Bi-curious but he's never really had the chance to figure that shit out Gender Headcanon: a man's man... he's having enough of a time without adding gender exploration to the list A ship I have with said character: myrna, rip... 😞 A BROTP I have with said character: again, the dynamic with cloud is both funny and interesting A NOTP I have with said character: nothing that i've really seen but i definitely would say no to yuffie for shipping A random headcanon: given the opportunity this man would probably foster kittens or something like that, expanding the dad horizons... General Opinion over said character: he's so dramatic about things sometimes and in general i love him for that

[ladynecropolis]

okay after receiving the resounding support of two (2) of my loyal mutuals I have decided to release the documents.

—jack is agender but doesn't realize it. he's probably nonbinary but he's got a job so he doesn't care about that rn. sexuality also can't quite be labeled but like he's too busy thinking about other stuff to really deal with that right now

—kate is bisexual STRONG preference for women

—sawyer is bisexual equally attracted to men and woman. (I don't see him as trans im. SORRY I love and respect everyone who headcanons him as trans I think that's awesome. it's just there's something specific about his relationship to masculinity for me that makes the most sense to be cis)

—juliet is a transgender woman whose gender & transition is definitely very connected to her being a fertility doctor . don't boo me I'm right. also bi with a preference for women

—charlie is a transgender man & aroace but I don't think he knows what aroace means, he just assumes everyone's supposed to feel attraction & enjoys sex for the attention it gives him. if you tried to explain the concept to him he would not understand it. his relationship with claire is queerplatonic but neither of them are really aware of that

—speaking of claire, I like the idea of her being bi/ace

—hurley is a transgender man in a distinctly bill and ted way (god i just know he loves bill and ted...)

—hear me out on transfem libby PLEASE

—also transfem shannon!!!

—desmond is either non-binary or transfem but doesn't realize it yet and most likely won't ever/for a very long time. also, he's bisexual & demiromantic because . hes just like me fr

—all four of the freighter four are transgender. yes that includes frank. miles had a punk phase of course he isn't cis. I just think transfem charlotte is neat :) . daniel transmasc&agender real? definitely handled his own hrt in some fucked up mad science shit

it's pride month should inpost the length of my lost queer headcanons of which I have too many

[adriensaltprompts]

Submitted prompt: A Better (Nonbinary) Boyfriend

Inspired by Dove Cameron's song "Boyfriend", aka the best queer love song to come out this year, don't @ me.

Alya's superhero fangirl tendencies lead to her finding out about a Miraculous holder in the Democratic Republic of the Congo, the Cheetah Miraculous holder, Guepard Gris.

Marinette's initial reaction is panic, because she can't possibly go to Africa in the event Hawkmoth realizes there's a Miraculous there.

Fortunately, Guepard has a friend who's functioning as their media liaison, and when Alya contacts her, she arranges for Ladybug and Guepard to talk.

Guepard takes their superhero duties seriously. They have a lot of pressure on them as the first publicly out nonbinary superhero in their country, they're looking for the other Miraculouses in the African Miraculous Box, and Ladybug is so relieved to get to talk to someone who understands what it's like to have a lot of high expectations to meet and too much to do.

What starts as a one-off conversation to warn them Hawkmoth has a non-zero chance of coming for their Miraculous some day turns into repeat conversations to vent, chat and share superhero stories.

Eventually they exchange burner/cloud cell numbers to text through, and Marinette has someone to lean on as well as someone to give advice to about the value of friendship in trying to deal with life as a hero.

She also vents about Chat Noir, about the unrelenting harassment and how no matter how many times she says she's not interested, he just keeps after her. Guepard is not amused in the slightest, nor do they think it's romantic. They validate her feelings of disgust and horror, which she really appreciates.

Chat Noir on the other hand, doesn't appreciate that Ladybug is always going on about Guepard's latest heroic activities rescuing people from this or that, but, well, if he wants her to stop, maybe he should try doing something heroic himself, sometime.

Guepard gets into an exchange student program and moves to Paris when Marinette has a sobbing breakdown one day, overwhelmed and in need of backup.

They aren't moving to Paris to try to romance her, they just really want to help beat Hawkmoth permanently so the world as they know it can be safe.

They and Marinette agree to meet and share secret identities because Marinette needs someone she can trust fully, and because they're level-headed and eternally calm in a way Chat Noir distinctly isn't.

Out of superhero form, they're Janvier Desjardin, transmasc enby and the new transfer student in Marinette's class.

Janvier being in Marinette's class means that Marinette now gets to witness firsthand Adrien going from excusing Chloe's racism...to partaking in that anti-African French racism of mocking names that get used predominantly in Africa, like Janvier, and saying things like 'I'm surprised you speak French so well'.

Marinette's crush on Adrien dies swiftly and violently.

He may have been charming to her once, but this is just repulsive in ways he can't charm himself out of, even if he means his comments non-maliciously - racism is racism no matter how innocently it's phrased, and he should know better.

Adrien as Chat Noir clashes hard with the transfered superhero whose pronouns he finds annoying to use and whose skin he can't get under.

Guepard goes in, does Chat Noir's job for him, and it turns out Chat Noir's not even necessary for some battles. The black cat is out, the silver cheetah is in, praised by the Parisian press for their work ethic, compassion, and politeness.

This prompts Adrien to quit yet again.

But this time, Marinette reclaims the Black Cat Miraculous and doesn't give it back to him. If he can't work with someone and prioritize the safety of the people of Paris, then he's not fit to be a superhero. She'll find someone else.

The superhero team works a lot better without Chat Noir around, it turns out.

Guepard and Ladybug can handle patrols and akumas on their own, too. It's actually really nice to have someone who trusts in her authority and skill as a hero and takes her wishes and feelings into account. Mariette's never had a friendship like this before. They're there for each other, on the job and off.

Marinette never feels alone or overworked, she knows she has someone who'll back her up through thick and thin, and Janvier will even help her with studying and help her out with her class president duties.

She doesn't even notice Adrien being more sulky and withdrawn lately now that she's got Janvier, Nino, Alya, Kagami, and Luka as her friendgroup. She's happy. She's really, truly happy.

And when Janvier starts developing feelings for her, they actually ask her if she wants to go out and respects it when she says she needs time to think it over. No pushing, no trying to force themselves into her personal space, no bringing it up mid-fight - they give her time to think about it, and make it clear that no matter what her answer, they'll still be her friend, and they'll never stop being her hero partner.

When she decides that no, she needs to focus on fighting Hawkmoth right now, they absolutely agree and thank her for letting them down gently and being mature about this rather than making things awkward. They're still friends, eating ice cream together, sharing music, texting and fighting evil. Not once do Marinette's fears of being punished mid fight come true. Unlike Adrien, her new partner is actually her partner, someone she can rely on.

Once Hawkmoth is defeated, though, Ladybug is 100% smooching her new nonbinary boyfriend. They're a better boyfriend than him, and that's what she deserves. They traveled across continents to help other people. They respect her wishes. And best of all, they make her happy - something Chat Noir never did.

[beechbloom]

Coming out to Kazuha as transgender

Tried to make this as inclusive as possible so that all trans people (both ftm/mtf and nonbinary) can see themselves in this. There a lot of ways to be trans tho so hnng

Oh and this could definitely just be viewed as all platonic. Kazuha and reader might be dating, or might not be. YOU decide 🫵

You seem nervous when you tell him

Little do you know, he’s known for some time already

“I had a hunch that may be the case. There was something distinctly unique in the feeling you give off, unlike that of a [agab].”

Honestly just goes with it, instantly starting to refer to you with the terms you prefer

This man is so used to thinking through his words as he speaks (making them pleasing to the ear) that he doesn’t struggle at all if you ask him to use different pronouns for you

Even neopronouns will be a walk in the park for him! Though he has to properly grasp how they work first, of course

Will ask you if you’re only comfortable with him knowing this, or if you want others to know too

Depending on your answer, he will act accordingly around people who don’t know

If you don’t want others to know, he’ll refer to you rather neutrally

Will go with either your agab pronouns, they/them, or might even try to avoid pronouns altogether depending on what you prefer

If anyone could refer to you with no pronouns ever and still have it sound natural, it'd be him

If you’re fine with others knowing, he will act like your gender is as normal as the sun being up during daytime

Will be a little hesitant if you ask him to explain it to someone, as he really won't be speaking from experience. But if you truly are too nervous to do it yourself, then he'll try

And despite his hesitance he'll be damn good at it, explaining it in a way that makes it sound so very natural and almost beautiful

Will definitely hear you out if you wanna discuss gender stuff

“Whilst I am unable to relate, I still understand that this is important to you. Please know that I am here to listen to anything you wish to tell me.”

He’ll ask questions if he feels he doesn’t understand something, but never in a way that invalidates your identity

If you tell him what causes you dysphoria he’ll definitely try to subtly keep you away from those situations

And if you tell him what causes you euphoria he’ll try and help you experience that every now and then

If you start altering your appearance to match how you feel inside, he’ll support you

He might even suggest things he thinks could help you feel more at home in your body

After a while, he’d definitely remind you of your progress

“I just have to say that seeing how far you’ve come, it truly brings me joy. You have grown so much with this, and the confidence you’ve gained from it makes itself apparent in all that you are. I’m proud of you.”

There’s nothing but respect from this man regarding your gender

You seem nervous when you tell him

Little do you know, he’s known for some time already

“I had a hunch that may be the case. There was something distinctly unique in the feeling you give off, unlike that of a [agab].”

Honestly just goes with it, instantly starting to refer to you with the terms you prefer

This man is so used to thinking through his words as he speaks (making them pleasing to the ear) that he doesn’t struggle at all if you ask him to use different pronouns for you

Even neopronouns will be a walk in the park for him! Though he has to properly grasp how they work first, of course

Will ask you if you’re only comfortable with him knowing this, or if you want others to know too

Depending on your answer, he will act accordingly around people who don’t know

If you don’t want others to know, he’ll refer to you rather neutrally

Will go with either your agab pronouns, they/them, or might even try to avoid pronouns altogether depending on what you prefer

If anyone could refer to you with no pronouns ever and still have it sound natural, it'd be him

If you’re fine with others knowing, he will act like your gender is as normal as the sun being up during daytime

Will be a little hesitant if you ask him to explain it to someone, as he really won't be speaking from experience. But if you truly are too nervous to do it yourself, then he'll try

And despite his hesitance he'll be damn good at it, explaining it in a way that makes it sound so very natural and almost beautiful

Will definitely hear you out if you wanna discuss gender stuff

“Whilst I am unable to relate, I still understand that this is important to you. Please know that I am here to listen to anything you wish to tell me.”

He’ll ask questions if he feels he doesn’t understand something, but never in a way that invalidates your identity

If you tell him what causes you dysphoria he’ll definitely try to subtly keep you away from those situations

And if you tell him what causes you euphoria he’ll try and help you experience that every now and then

If you start altering your appearance to match how you feel inside, he’ll support you

He might even suggest things he thinks could help you feel more at home in your body

After a while, he’d definitely remind you of your progress

“I just have to say that seeing how far you’ve come, it truly brings me joy. You have grown so much with this, and the confidence you’ve gained from it makes itself apparent in all that you are. I’m proud of you.”

There’s nothing but respect from this man regarding your gender

[kiridarling]

𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐂!

izuku midoriya | tw!guns, single mom!reader, bouncer!izuku, domestic stuffs, tit sucking, mommy!calling ah, AND daddy!calling oh my, breeding kink, breaking the bed (futon). minors dni!

— 5.4k words

“When’s the last time someone touched you like this, hmm?”

The alley is dark.

There's a disconcerting feeling as you step deeper into the quiet darkness,

You turn to look at the door you entered this dank place from, but it's just as dark and grimy as the walls. You're almost positive that if you rested a hand against them, it would return pitch black, and if you stood in one spot for more than five minutes, the sticky booze would glue your heels to the floor. You're surprised when it doesn't.

"Hand over your wallet and no one gets hurt, pretty lady."

He's a smarmy looking bastard and as thin as they come. It’s clear this isn’t something he does on the regular, the pointed gun quivering so much you worry a trembling might slip and pull the trigger. And you fucking freeze, blood running below zero and heart plummeting because why you?

And fuck, you’ve got a kid at home with a babysitter, and there are many outcomes to this situation, none of them too cute.

"I said hand it over," he grunts, pressing forwards. Your back hits the grimy brick wall as your eyes dart to the mouth of the alley, where life continues, where cars race past, but no one sees a damn thing. Fuck. Fuck.

And it's not like you have much—hell, you may be a mother, but you know how to party. You squeeze your eyes shut, grip tightening around your purse as you clumsily fumble through it and the man steps closer. You toss all you have to his feet. A fucking twenty. He raises an eyebrow before eyeing your watch. He lets out an unimpressed snort.

"That it?"

You nod, taking a shaky step back.

"Well, that ain't fuckin' enough."

There's a click and you're positive it's him turning off the safety. His face twists like he's about to shoot a bullseye, and you squeeze your eyes as tight as they can go.

Until the looming shadow of the stranger disappears, followed by a sound that's distinctly skin on skin. Er—skin on bone.

You don't watch the fight. Frankly, you don't want to, and you still get to hear your protector spew a litany of curses and disrespectful phrases that should really only come from someone's mother. You don't even open your eyes, still screwed shut with a vice grip around your purse and wallet.

"Um, excuse me Miss? Are you alright?"

Your protector's eyes are much bigger than you expect them to be—and green. You realize you remember seeing those eyes, hardened from across the club.

He's hesitant to touch you, hands rising and falling and rising again. Though you suppose a hug seems like it'd be a little abrasive, it also sounds like the exact kind of thing you need right now.

"U-Um, yeah I'm..." you start, before noticing your attackers body bloodied and wrapped like a pretzel on the ground. "...Fine..."

He sounds like he's going to pass out—he doesn't.

"We should um, we should get you home," As he speaks, the greenette shuffles you out of the alley and into the streetlamp light, blinking himself out of something before holding a meaty hand out of formality. "I'm Izuku by the way. Izuku Midoriya."

For such a big guy, Izuku seems rather timid, and yet, seeing him at the entrance with crossed arms in a black tee and a scowl in the club doesn't give you much insight into his personality. Which makes you wonder why he became the club's bouncer in the first place.

"Um, nice to meet you," you nod, trying to suppress the shake in your hands as you take his. "Y/N."

Izuku smiles at that, and even though you're a regular, you've never actually seen him beam on the job. "Cool! Cool, so...um, I don't really feel comfortable letting you walk home...alone..."

You nod—he panics as if you aren't already on board.

"'Cause it's like, a conscience thing, you know? Like, I really won't be able to sleep tonight otherwise," Izuku defends, shoving a clumsy hand in his green curls. "B-But if you don't feel comfortable with it, or something, that's totally fine! I know what you just experienced was horrible, and you probably do—"

"Izuku."

"Yeah?" He perks up. It seems as if the circuit his mind runs finally comes to a stop.

"I'd...feel more comfortable if you walked me home. Too."

Your innards ache at the stiffness in both your voice and figure, but Izuku doesn't seem to notice. Instead, he beams, standing ten feet taller, and you think—yeah. You'd feel much safer if he did.

"O-Okay! Cool!" He confirms a bit stiff himself, and then, in a smoother motion, holds his hand out to take. "Shall we?"

Your red palm claps over his, and you snort quietly, "We shall."

You two walk in a surprisingly comfortable silence for the beginning of the walk—you lead the way and he silently trails behind, glaring daggers at any passerby with lingering eyes as you march on, unknowing.

"So um, do you come to Club 777 often?"

Which is a question you know he knows the answer to, completely aware you almost come every Saturday. But you smile at his attempt to start a conversation anyways, hands tucking underneath your armpits in search of warmth.

"Yeah, sometimes. Just trying to get out and stuff. Y'know, away from the kid."

"I get that," he nods with a smile, before tugging at the hem of his hoodie. "Oh! Are you cold? Here—wait, let me."

He shucks it over your head and your positive it messes up your hair. But you find that you don't care much, especially in favor of the warmth that it provides.

And then, "You have a kid?"

"Yep," you say, tucking your fists into the jacket pockets. "A big two-year-old potato waits for me back home."

"Oh," Izuku chortles at your description before tucking his hands into his jean pockets too. Licking his lips, his eyes dart to the street, "I...assume your boyfriend watches him for the night? Or husband or whoever."

"Uhm, not quite," you chuckle towards your feet, though it's a touch acrid. Izuku picks up on it immediately.

"Oh I'm so sorr—I didn't kno—"

"It's fine, Izuku really—"

"I���but I shouldn't even be assuming what if you had a wife or girlfriend or—" he takes a second to gasp, and your eyes widen in fear that he'll choke, "—or if they're nonbinary or—"

"Izuku," you knock him on the shoulder and he finally shuts up. "It's fine. I get it all the time."

He falters, but at least he seems to relax. "Really?"

"Yes," you giggle behind a hand, and the greenette smiles at it.

"O-Okay, cool."

Flecks of gold swim in Izuku's green irises and you find yourself noticing them now, suppressing the urge to advance closer for a better look. You stare long enough to watch his smile relax into a comfortable line, but you snap out of it once he kicks a rock, the sound of the gravel skittering across the floor tugging you out of your reverie.

"I'm not very good with kids, y'know," he says as an afterthought. You snort.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I mean," he scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. "Like what am I supposed to feed it? French fries?"

"Toddlers aren't it's, Izu." You can't tell if he flushes from the nickname or from what you said, but either way, it's enough to prompt another laugh. "And maybe start with baby food?"

"Ah," Izuku nods, and you guide him in turning a corner. "That would make sense.

"It would."

By the time you stop in front of your red front door, it's almost three am. You figure you caught Izuku right after he got off work, if the cheesy All Might sweatshirt you're wearing is any evidence of that, but either way, he looks like he's about to fall flat on his face.

"You can stay for the night, if you want," you offer, albeit meekly, and Izuku lifts two hands with insistence.

"Oh! No no no please, I'm fine," he shakes his head so quickly his curls bounce in a flurry, and you genuinely worry he's going to pass out when he tries to blink himself awake. "Just...not used to staying up this late is all."

"Then stay," you offer with a shrug, and your orange porch light flickers. "It's the least I can do. I've got a bed and a futon, and I'm fine with sleeping on either."

"I..." Izuku's green eyes flicker towards your door before back to you, "I really shouldn't. I'm a stranger an—"

"And I'm offering."

Izuku's eyebrows fold with the dilemma, but you grab his hand with a tug and a smile, while your free one shoves the keys into the door. "C'mon. Let's get you some rest, yeah?"

You can't tell if Izuku blushes or if it's just the lighting, but either way, his chest inflates in protest before deflating in resignation.

"Okay."

With a smile, you turn the doorknob. Your door has always taken some shoulder to get open, so you don't hesitate in shoving your collarbone into the hardwood. Izuku cringes at the sight.

"Mama!"

Your hit in the legs first, nearly stumbling back with a quiet oof. You look down to see Max wrapped around your legs like you're a fucking jungle gym, grinning with two missing teeth and a bandaid over his nose.

It's three am.

"I'm done," your babysitter grunts. "He doesn't listen when I tell him to bathe, eat, anything—I fucking quit."

And with that, they slam the door behind them, house rattling under the pressure. You sigh. There goes another one. Fuck.

"Well that wasn't very nice," Izuku grumbles under his breath disapprovingly. You smile at the arms crossed over his chest until Max peeks around your legs to see...

"A new daddy?"

"I—no, baby," you fight the embarrassment (and the urge to say you fucking wish) by picking the little one up by his armpits, smiling when he thrusts his hands in the air and goes weee! After he's comfortably cradled in your arms, you say, "He's just staying the night."

"Like daddy did!" Max defends with a giggle before rushing the greenette with open arms. Izuku just looks at you with a shrug before kneeling to take a hug to the chest as Max chants, "New daddy! New daddy!"

And, well. There's no stopping him now.

You peel your heels off your cramping feet and sigh at the fucking freedom, toes uncurling from the scrunched position it feels like they've been holding the entire night. You curse under your breath when you realize since Max is awake you've got to put him to bed too, and honestly, if you knew this babysitter was going to be just as useless as the others, you would've just let Max run fucking free while you lived life for a few hours. Not like that outcome would be any better.

"Alright Maxie, c'mon."

You take him away from his celebration with the greenette and though he pouts, he allows his mother to gather him in her arms.

"Do you um, need help?"

You turn to see Izuku awkwardly shifting in the doorway from the request, hands behind his back with pursed lips. You shake your head.

"Oh no, it's fine. I just have to put him down really quickly and then I'll be—"

"Mama, I'm hungry. I want chicken nuggies." Max loops his arms around your neck and tugs so hard you worry about your bones. You shake your head with a sigh and a pout.

"It's too late for you to be up, bud. You can have chicken nuggies for lunch tomorrow. Sound like a plan?"

But goodness. In this state, it'll take hours for him to relax—and you still have to unfold the futon for Izuku.

Max whines and kicks his legs but doesn't say no, meaning he's not really that hungry, he just wants to stay awake. "But—but what if new daddy's gone in the morning like the last one?"

Fuck.

"Max," you sigh, giving him a light shake so his matching eyes look into you yours. You speak a little softer, "Izuku's not your new daddy, okay? He's a houseguest."

Max's face drops. "Not eve—"

"No, Maxie," you sigh, squeezing him on the shoulder. "Now let's go to bed, okay?"

"I can—I can put him down if you'd like! So you can get into something more comfortable and stuff. I mean, I've never worn a dress but sweats are so much better, you know? Or shorts, or...whatever you wear to sleep."

You understand the many points he's trying to get across, one being that's he's not a creep, just a nice guy, and you suppose you and Max can live in your "new daddy" fantasy for a little longer. Even if you know this one will be gone by morning.

"Um, okay yeah," you say, voice a little thin, before handing your child over to the greenette—who bounces into his arms excitedly. "I'll be back, then? His room is down the hall to the right. The one with the race car bed."

Izuku's eyes narrow as he processes your directions. "Down the hall to the right—okay! I'll just go take this little guy to bed, then."

"Okay, thank you," you nearly bow, because Izuku just saved both of you so much time and he doesn't even understand how. "Oh! And good luck."

"Good...luck?"

"Yep!" You say with a wink and a pat on the back before scooping your heels and booking it back to your bedroom with a cackle. Time to get out of this dress. Fucking finally.

You realize that being alone is much more unsettling when you've had a gun held to your head today.

Every little noise just seems off, like it could belong to something more than it actually does, even the silence; you find yourself shoving your head through your t-shirt abnormally fast, eyes blinking to take a survey of the room to ensure that you're alone. You are. It's fine.

And that's what you tell yourself when you close your eyes to run a wet rag over your face, and again with the dry one. All of a sudden, you don't like the way your bathroom window faces the open backyard nor do you like how dark it is outside. You don't like how big your bed looks, and goddammit, you haven't even gotten into it yet.

Pushing all uneasy thoughts aside, you stumble out of your bedroom with a fresh face and a new outfit, stilling in Max's doorway when the greenette doesn't notice you. Resting against the frame with crossed arms, you smile.

"I do so like green eggs and ham! Thank you! Thank you, Sam-I-am. You know, when I was a kid I—oh, he's asleep."

Izuku tucks the snoring boy in his lap under the covers with a gentle grin, pulling them underneath his chin. The greenette takes a second, watches Max's chest rise and fall a few times, before ruffling the tuft of hair on his head with a snort, and walking away.

You don't even think Izuku sees you until he practically sashays out the door, winking, "Good luck, huh?"

To say you go red in the face from that is an understatement.

"How do you do this?"

"Do what?" You ask as you pulling the futon in your living room forwards. Izuku yawns before gesturing to the clock with a shake of his head.

"Take care of a kid, and work, and go to a bar every Saturday evening? It's four am, and something tells me you've been up for a while. I'm practically dead and I wake up at one pm every day!"

You chuckle at that, jumping on the bed with your hands and knees to ensure its lays flat...and ensure that it won't make an Izuku sandwich at seven in the morning. "You build up stamina after a while, I guess."

"No shit," he gestures to you as you utilize the entire length of your body to put the sheets on the mattress. He would help, but you told him no, insisting that he'd only make this take longer. "Are you sure you do—"

"Nope," you huff, clapping your hands together. "I'm done."

Izuku blinks at the made bed, to you, to the made bed again, and then back to you with wide eyes.

"Mommy magic."

"I—" you blink towards the ceiling to see if that even makes sense, but you figure fuck it, it's four am, with a snort. "Yeah, sure. Whatever you want to call it."

In reality, you feel like you're about to pass out.

"Um, so I don't really have pj pants and I don't think you'll have any that'll fit, so..."

"Yeah no, I definitely burned all the shit my ex left—"

"Aha okay, cool, um, so just boxers...are fine...?"

He looks down at his black jeans and back to you, raising an eyebrow. You toss a nonchalant shrug in return, and you hate to say it, but your inner school girl goes—dick outline.

"O-Okay, then," Izuku says, and you watch his hands curl around the waistband. "I'm just gonna—"

He shucks his pants so hard they hit the floor, and your eyes widen because...well...looks like he's just gonna do it then.

Until Izuku's hands rush to cover his crotch (which you weren't peeking at, you weren't) and you realize that maybe you should've stepped out of the room or something.

"U-Um—that was fast—"

"I thought—thought you were going to uhm, turn around," he flushes, a funny contrast to the way his muscles fold under that black shirt, and your feet move to turn around like he ordered you to do it.

"Sorry! So sorry," you try to apologize, but now his dick print is burned in your brain, and...it isn't that bad.

"It—It's fine! I'm in the bed now so, you can turn around."

You laugh awkwardly and scuffle to turn, as you do, and Izuku beams at you from the bed with a wave.

"Hi," he says, his lower half-tucked under the covers. You wave back.

"Hi."

Izuku's eyes dart to you living room tv before the come back to you. "So uhm, I guess this is goodnight?"

"Oh right," you perk up at that, hands rubbing the sides of your thighs like there's something on them. "Time to go to bed, right?"

"Uh, yeah!" He nods, chest shuddering before he says, "so uh, sweet dreams?"

You smile tight at the kind gesture, and your hands opt to pull at the hem of your shirt instead, eyes drifting to an old pile of records you haven't regarded in months. "Thanks! You...too?"

Izuku smiles, though his eyes drift, "Yeah..."

You beam back. You figure you should probably go now, or something, until you think of something and slam a fist into your palm. "Oh! Also, I meant to thank you for saving me. I'm not sure if I did that. Did I do that?"

The greenette shrugs, "Uh, I think so?"

"Okay! Okay. Cool," you nod, flashing a tight smile. "Mmk. Night Izuku."

"G'night."

And see, you would move—except it seems as if your feet are glued to the floor and won't move no matter how hard you try, to the point where it feels like your straining and they're going numb, and yet you're still staring at Izuku's pretty fucking face.

"C'mon," he chuckles, scooting over on the futon to make extra space for you. "If you take all day, the beds gonna get cold, and then I'm going to have to crawl into yours like a creep."

"Oh my fucking god," you snort one breath and move to flick off the lights before stumbling through the darkness for the futon. "You're so weird."

"Weird in a good way, I hope," he lifts the blanket and you slide under—and swear your knee grazes his before it's snatched away.

"There's no weird in a bad way," you say once you've settled comfortably, tucking your hands under your head as you lay on your stomach. Izuku mimics your position, though he takes up much more of the blanket, and you find that it drapes over you like a tent over his shoulders. Neither of you close your eyes, for some reason.

"Hi," Izuku whispers.

"Hi," you smile back.

"Okay," he huffs, face twisting in determination, "Now it's goodnight."

"Right," you nod, but your eyes don't close. "Goodnight. Of course."

"Don't let the bedbugs bite," he says with a chuckle, and you can't tell if his eyes flicker to your lips or if you imagine it. Either way, you look them just in case.

"I better not have bedbugs," you snort. "I clean this place like a motherfucker."

Izuku's nose twitches at that with a nod. Moonlight pours into your living room and colors his pale skin silver, though you figure it won't take the sun much longer to color it a strawberry pink. "You really do. It's...different when it's quiet."

"Yeah," you agree, placing your hands on his chest. It shudders under your palms. "Kinda personal, huh?"

"Mhm," he nods, and though his hands wrap around your wrists, they never pull them away. You lift an eyebrow.

"A bad personal?"

Izuku doesn't hesitate, breath nearly ghosting your lips as he says, "Hardly."

"Would you..." now it's your chests turn to shudder, and sliding a hand up to play with his ear, you bite the bullet. "Like to get more personal?"

Izuku's lips melt into a grin against yours, "I'd love to."

His lips are softer than you thought.

Maybe because you assumed all of him was a bumbling mess, including his chapstick application; but they're fucking pillow-soft, and you don't realize how deprived you are until his hold around your body turns from protective to sensual and you melt from his heat.

"Fuck," Izuku huffs between kisses, growling when your grip around his neck tightens. "Watching you from across the club for weeks can do a thing to a guy's patience, you know."

"Oh?" You snort as he presses enthusiastic open-mouthed kisses down the column of your neck, hot and wet, and painful once his teeth dig into your collarbone. "A-Ah, Izuku—no marks."

"O-Oh! Sorry," he pulls away, lips red and swollen, and shiny with spit. You smile at the reaction.

"'S okay, Baby," you giggle at the speed to which his muscles go lax, and his eyes droop to your chest when you scratch the back of his head.

"Can I—can I suck your tits?"

He asks so bashfully it's nearly innocent, and you find your eyes dropping to your chest along with his before you're ditching his All Might sweatshirt all together.

"God," Izuku's eyes flutter as he gathers your breasts in both palms, groaning at the sight. "They're fucking perfect."

You shudder as his thumb ghosts a nipple, and Izuku dips an experimental hand under your lacy bra and pinches. Hard.

Your thighs jolt and hands fist the sheets, and a moan comes from the back of your throat before you can stop it. Izuku's hand rocket to cover your mouth.

"Shh—you don't wanna wake him up, do you?"

You shake your head, but it's hard to keep quiet when your nipples are as sensitive as they are. Izuku doesn't seem like he really means that statement, though, lowering his head with a devilish grin as if he knows that for himself.

“Sensitive, Mommy?”

“O-Oh um,” you flush at the nickname, and even more so when his lips close around your nipple and suck. Tangling a hand in his hair, you sigh, “Yeah, a little.”

Izuku hums at that, eyes fluttering to watch you bite your bottom lip in a poor attempt to muffle a moan, hissing as his teeth dig into the hardened bud. He pulls off with a slurp and moves to the other, but not without a few kisses across your chest.

“When’s the last time someone touched you like this, hmm?” Izuku nearly growls out before biting into the opposite nipple, and you shudder as he dips a scarred hand down the waistband of your shorts and panties. He chuckles after sliding a finger through your slit. “So wet for me.”

“It—It’s been a second,” you sigh, grip tightening around his shoulders as he slides a finger in. Even Izuku has to bite a lip at your tightness in anticipation, mouth descending over your nipple once more to send frissons of fire up your spine.

“No shit,” he grunts around your nipple, curling his finger. You gasp. “Think I can fit another one in there?”

“Why don’t you try?” You giggle, but it dissipates into nothing but air as he does, his two fingers filling you up enough to elicit a sigh.

“How’s that?” He breathes, face hovering over yours. As your hands coil around his neck, his free one reaches for your inner thigh and pulls it back far enough to give him a better angle as he presses you into the mattress.

“Good, it’s good,” you nod, and your hips start to move on their own, bucking forwards as if there’s any more finger left for you to fuck. (Spoiler: there’s not.)

“Good,” he breathes, eyes going glossy as he watches you writhe under him. You're positive that you're carving painful red lines into his back, but considering the way his eyebrows fold every time you do, makes you wonder if he doesn't mind. "Fuck I can't wait to fuck you—I can fuck you, right?"

"No Izuku, I'm just letting you finger me for fu-u—fuck."

He slides in a third finger and for some reason, it burns a little—but the burn only makes your eyes roll further, and he's stuffing you with a chuckle.

"What was that?"

"I-I—you're not pla—playing very fair," you huff, chest shuddering as he tilts your hips higher for a better angle. You suppress a scream when his fingers curl, jolting forwards at such a speed it makes the futon creak. Izuku tightens his grip around your waist to keep you from going too far.

"No one said anything about being fair, Mommy," he teases, and you whine when he removes his fingers, tapping them against your lips. "C'mon, you gotta get 'em wet so I can fuck you, right?"

You nod at the idea, enjoying the idea of being filled up much more, and coat his fingers to the point where they're dripping when he pulls him out. Izuku's chest rumbles.

"So good for me," he purrs, using your spit to coat his cock before he's sliding his head between your folds—you shiver, grabbing onto his back again. "Ready?"

“Mhm,” you nod, spreading your legs further—though you swear they do that on their own.

“Oh my, you’re um...tight...”

You whimper from the stretch and look between your legs, eyes widening upon seeing that Izuku’s much bigger than you had anticipated. Or had been warned of.

“F-Fuck, I can’t—“

“Shhhh, it’s okay, just a little more, okay?” Izuku nearly whispers into your lips as his hands move to rub your shuddering sides. Your eyes screw shut, “Jus’ a little more, Mommy...”

Izuku pushes deeper and you’re being split in half—because what else could that burn be—but you’ll admit, the feeling of accomplishment you receive once he bottoms out is surreal.

“Good—Good girl,” Izuku’s nearly quivering and plants his hands on both sides of your head with a huff.

“I-Izu,” you whimper as he starts to move, feeling impossibly full no matter how far he pulls out. Izuku shudders, mouth rounding into an ‘o’ when his hips slowly start to gain rhythm, and though it’s loud, you know the creak of the futon is unavoidable. You squeal as his head hammers into your cervix, pulling out a wanton Daddy before you have half a mind to shut the fuck up. You nearly freeze, and yet, all Izuku’s hips do is speed up.

“Yeah? Want me to be your new Daddy?” He moans, and you dig your nails into his back with a nod. The greenette curses at that, biting his bottom lip and his hand drops between your legs to rub at your clit. With thighs seizing around his waist, you slam a hand over your mouth to keep yourself quiet.

“Fuck—I make you feel that good, Mommy?” Izuku nearly wheezes, eyes suppressing the urge to screw closed, “So good you can’t keep your pretty mouth shut?”

“Y-Yeah, I—“ you gasp when he lifts your hips off the bed for a better angle, hands fisting the sheets. “Harder, Daddy—“

“Oh Mommy, if I go any harder I think I might break this bed,” he says, borderline bashful, but you find yourself saying fuck the bed as your hips buck in search of a feeling he refuses to give you. Izuku’s chuckle strains as he says, “So needy, Mommy. You that needy for my cum?”

Clawing at his back, you try your damnest to stutter out a yes. Izuku chuckles at your desperation before he cuts himself off with a groan, eyes rocketing to where you’re both connected as you tighten around him.

“F-Fill me up, I wanna—“

“You want another baby, Mommy?” Izuku pants, and you’re so close you start to feel a buzz in your thighs, praying he isn’t too far behind. You nod vehemently with a gasp and his lips slide into an exhausted smile, "Fuck, of course you do—and you’re gonna take me so well, aren’t you? All of it.”

Izuku finishes his sentence with a growl, pressing you further into the mattress—it squeaks like a squeaky wheel, and when it thunks a level lower both of you yelp, the back of the futon thumping on your hardwood floor with each thrust.

“Told ya,” Izuku wheezes, eyes scrunching in a chuckle. You return it.

“It—It’s old anyway,” you reply, but your eyebrows fold as quickly as they unfold from the crash. The creaking futon increases in pitch as his hips pick up the pace, “Fuck—fuck Izuku I’m gonna cum.”

“What’s my name?” The greenette challenges, and you find yourself shivering at the dominance he exudes. The finger on your clit disappears and you whine, knowing damn well you can’t cum without it.

“Daddy—Daddy please—“

“Good—fuck, so good for me,” his hand returns to your clit and you sigh at the feeling. As the coil in your gut threatens to snap, his hips speed up, and Izuku pants, “We’re gonna cum together, yeah? Cum with me Mommy, c’mon—“

“Fuck!” You drag red lines down Izuku’s back as you quake under the weight of your orgasm, broken bed whining as Izuku thrusts all his weight into you. Digging his teeth into your shoulder, the greenette cums with a broken moan, hips stuttering into yours for the final time that night.

The room fills with a comfortable silence, minus the panting, and Izuku rolls onto the mattress next to you with a bounce. It creaks, whines, and then drops again, catching both you and the greenette by surprise. (Again.)

“I think—I think we broke it,” Izuku says towards the ceiling as he catches his breath. You giggle at that, hands laid across your sweaty stomach, and turn to him with your head in the pillow.

“Gives me an excuse to buy a new one,” you say with a shrug. Izuku chuckles back.

“I guess,” he teeters his head to both sides. “I can...also pitch in, if you want. Since I broke the thing. Technically.”

His offer sounds apprehensive as if he’s encroaching in your space, as if he hasn’t been all up in your space less than a minute ago. You smile. “I’d like that a lot, actually. Thanks.”

"And um, breakfast? I mean," he snorts, though it seems rather defensive, and his eyes rocket to the ticking clock on your wall. Your eyes follow: five am. "I mean—fuck um, I feel like this might be weird but I think you're cool? Um, yeah, so breakfast, I can make it if you want because you're so busy being motherly and stuff and plus, it's Sunday but again, if you don't wan—"

"Izuku," you giggle, wrapping your arms around his gut with a little squeeze. "Breakfast sounds nice."

The greenette beams and his chest stutters. "O-Okay cool! Cool, cool. Breakfast then?"

You snort, driving your palm into his face to shut him the fuck up. "Goodnight, Izuku."

Izuku giggles, getting the message, and coils his arms around your shoulders to provide a comfort you haven't felt in a very, very long time.

"G'night Mommy."

[k3nnjamin]

alternative (and probably the most accurate) to all the scenarios: None of them were socialized properly so everyone has a real skewed view of pack relationships and gender roles.

the pack bond wasn't even an intentional thing. but after a particularly stressful mission, they're all cuddling on the couch because no one can sleep (link to my favorite fan-made yj comic strip) and the world feels right again when they're all tangled up together. they wake up the next morning feeling distinctly different.

tim was trained to take over a company from a young age so he leans into the organizational aspect of his presentation now, bruce is an omega so he learned extremely well how to support others. but maybe jack and janet were hoping for a different outcome, a beta perhaps? a strong willed alpha boy? that's how they presented after all. maybe an omega son never crossed their mind, most omegas worked in the shadows after all. but tim still shows those a/b traits-- especially when his scent patch is on, so much easier to manipulate his image that way. but when it's off, he gets weird looks from strangers. such a sweet scented boy shouldn't be so abrasive, they think, what a spoiled brat.

kon is on the other end where he was taught extremely traditional alpha roles and no one really grasped to what extent until he makes an odd, outdated (sub)sexist remark or gets uncomfortably possessive about something minor (like resource guarding in dogs) or maybe he does have to argue with tim over leadership: "because i'm the alpha" / "you're a knothead is what you are -_-" then gets his ass handed to him. maybe his ego is so fragile in the beginning, connected directly to those identity issues, and he plays it off by getting an even bigger head. he's a sweet boy otherwise, especially after lex. he wants to help, he wants to do good and be kind and gentle and loving. he wants nothing more than to bask in the scents of the people he loves, to take care of them and watch them grow in the way he feels he can't, because it's difficult letting go of the behaviors he was taught. every time he tries to "protect" his loved ones he only ends up in the way, more people get hurt in the end. he so feels wrong. more and more inadequate. it's uncomfortable to watch his body go through motions that make him uncomfortable- that make Everyone uncomfortable. he hates this, he hates his instincts, he hates himself, and he hates lex.

uhm.. what a huge paragraph. anyways future-kid Bart probably learned a different set of customs altogether or none at all, or whatever Max thought he should know (god don't ask for specifics i don't know jack about that man). maybe he was a late bloomer and stayed kinda behind on everything, it never really mattered enough. i'm leaning into alpha!bart who is anything but a typical A, yeah he's protective of his friends and he'd go any lengths to keep them safe, but he doesn't manage behaviors or get physical/domineering. beta-esque in nature but notably not trans about it like kon is (or maybe he is, in like a nonbinary sort of way)

okay and i need to include cassie, but i know the least about her so here we go. i DO know that she's a half-blood and that wants to be Donna Troy. so. bad. which is a perfect mix to amplify her insecurities into the stratosphere. Beta calls to me. i feel it in my soul even before looking at the story elements. and lucky me because leadership is a huge marker and that makes for a satisfying story arc when she does beat out Tim for leadership. she seems like a pretty hard worker too, i can see her being an emotional anchor for the team, reigns them back in when they get off task or too nervous, in a commanding sort of way. then i think she'd struggle with higher tensions, since she didn't get that super soft side typical betas exhibit when everyone's pissed off. she's strong. she's always been strong, and its difficult to peace keep when no one is willing to listen to strong anymore. i think she subsidizes this with gift-giving a some point. a plate of cookies or something cute or shiny to cheer them up so it's easier to work out the issue. maybe it's so their scents blend when she offers out the item.

Pack dynamics with Transbeta Kon

i have a couple ideas for early core four omegaverse au, i need to talk them out so i can make my final decision (i also just miss them lmao, and need some dopamine) + poll bc i love community input

Okokok, before I start, i need to define the basic subgender roles / typical pack dynamics of this au:

betas are the majority presentation across the population. they're typically caretakers or leaders/second-in-commands within the pack, managing emotions and relationships. it's common to meet large packs entirely made up of betas. they collect scents of packmates easier and a touchy beta isn't out of the ordinary.

alphas are protectors primarily, but i think historically they would be put into roles of power just cause they're 'stronger' .. and we know how that ends. uhmm horomones make you silly (don't call em knotheads for nothing). if there's more than one alpha, one is like the head A that keeps the other alphas in line. generally help betas keep peace by scruffing their unruly packmates (or growling at them, or whatever needs done tbh). alphas are also known to be packless for one reason or another.

omegas are managers, they do all the tasks that keep the pack afloat physically. usually cooking, cleaning, groceries, bills, errands, delegating tasks to other packmates, and making sure everyone is doing their tasks properly. "women's work" in our world, but in a healthy pack the most taxing responsibilities (emotional labor and raising pups) should be spread pretty evenly. i think they're the most respected members, and deal out punishments/reprimands. you see lots of omegas in business.

----

i also need to mention before we dive in that Kon is trans Alpha to Beta in all three scenarios because he doesn't have enough identity issues already lmao

also, tim is the omega, i feel strongly about this and about the other three being a/b. if you have other feelings, please share, i would love to hear them!!

mention three, gonna come back to edit this or reblog when i've read more comic with more detailed descriptions on C+B because i only have vague knowledge on their personalities and i don't want to misrepresent them -_-

----

get it? got it? GREAT! now sit your ass down, it's time for me to bend all my social roles.

Scenario 1 (three alphas and tim):

this is such a juicy thought that i've been chewing on for a little bit. these were all brought about because i think Tim is a bit under-socialized and i think knowing his best friends of the same-ish subgenders are bonding without him (it's his fault, he's avoiding them) while he's the only omega is a special type of pain.

this one also adds the extra layer of Kon trying to overperform alpha-ness to fit it with the group, tension growing because of this, insecurity when Tim's omega does not fuck with his alpha, and eventually breaking down when they get Tim to be a physical part of the park and realizing they will love him anyways. (general extra) ma and pa bonding moment extra cause i've assigned them both B. so really i lied and thsi is 2A+1B+1O end goal, but i'm more focused on them all being high intensity at one point

//

Scene 2 (1 alpha + 2 beta + 1 omega):

someone suggested Bart as an alpha and I'm really into that .. Or Cassie.. and that's why i'm having this debate with myself in the first place

anyways Kon beta truther is back at it, but this time he has a non-family member packmate to emulate and help him transition into the role. this one could be a little smoother than the other two since he's moving to a role that's working and from a role that doesn't necessarily mourn his loss (they're not large enough yet to need two alphas). then he has some more room to explore his gender without all the stress of trying to hold onto a stereotype.

i do really like the thought of the two betas bonding over exploring their genders in addition to Tim's gender exploration as an omega pack leader who didn't get a lot of physical pack interaction in his life. lots of sweet moments, this is probably my favorite just because i love love love fluff :3

//

Scene The Third (three betas and an omega):

this one sees kon leaving the 'protector' role empty, and shame keeps him bonded to those actions for a long time even as he transitions. he gets so much worse before he lets his alpha go. behavioral issues stemming from the feeling that he has to continue keeping his friends' behaviors in check. displays of dominance and irritation that borders aggression. and he gets very possessive.

Until Bart dolls out a corrective behavior before Kon's instincts react to it. Cassie scruffs him before he can lose his ever loving mind (still trying to A). Tim reprimanding him by telling him it's not his place, doing work his blockers can't by classical conditioning Kon to start ignoring his leftover alpha instincts.. There's this flood of relief as he realizes his packmates are taking that burden off him and redistributing it between the three. they're fucking superheroes, they don't need to be protected.

actually??? this one might win me over simply because i could make real examples of their interactions

--

bonus ✨🍀

tim as the pack leader omega!! (and later cassie, but i haven't gotten there yet) he came in and was like "here's how it's gonna be, guys" and no one opposed him. i don't think anyone even knew what his presentation was until they were all living together, and even then that was entirely by accident. but he runs a good ship, leaning into the managerial role of omega. everyone finishes their chores "or else" (they're all afraid of what that might mean) and missions are executed .. well, he plans missions very well. but he's not too hot on the emotional side of leadership, a little too matter o fact. yeah, they're his friends, but they're not civilian friends. they know him a little Too personally. he can't put up a front like he did at school. so he emotionally retracts into himself. and this causes crazy problems.

[samstree]

for the drabble thing: “you weren’t there”

maybe post mountain geraskier? i’m in an angsty mood rn but whatever you wanna write will be good :)

Creatures of the Night (2)

It's the night of Jaskier and Valdo's wedding. Geralt needs to do something.

(endgame geraskier, background valdo/jaskier, angst, infidelity)

Previous | AO3

The Oxenfurt Observatory might just be the grandest building in Redania.

The great hall is decorated with countless flowers and candles, giving the ancient walls a soft glow. Through the tall glass ceiling, stars are shining in the clear night sky, the perfect weather for a wedding.

It must be Jaskier’s idea, to be handfasted at midnight, to have his guests slow-dance under the moon and the stars until dawn breaks. Their new life will begin when the candles burn out and the first ray of light spills into the room.

If only there’s a competition for the biggest romantic on the continent. Jaskier could win without breaking a sweat.

The room is being filled up with guests—mostly bards and professors, old schoolmates of the two grooms. After all, both Valdo and Jaskier are Oxenfurt’s children, which means everyone is dressed in the most colorful clothes one could imagine. In another word, the room is being filled up with Jaskiers, and it’s getting loud.

It’s more difficult to locate the bard himself through the din of the room, but Geralt hears him, unmistakably. Jaskier’s heartbeat approaches the Observatory, thrumming with nervousness.

No more nervous than Geralt.

He breathes in, and exits the room in a few strides. And there Jaskier is, surrounded by pale moonlight, with jasmine flowers braided into his hair and pure joy painted across his cheeks. He seems to be murmuring a private joke to Essi, and they both burst into strings of giggles.

Geralt almost backs out.

“Geralt!” Jaskier notices him. “You came! I was worried for a moment.”

“Of course.” Geralt gestures to the outfit he helped pick out. “You look nice.”

“Thank you. Now, Poppet, can you give us a few moments?” Jaskier sends Essi inside with the sweetest smile. She shoulders past Geralt a little too curtly. There’s always an air of wariness whenever Essi regards Geralt, an untrusting side-eye here and there.

“Don’t mind her.” Jaskier waves when they are left alone. “Little Eye is a tad too protective. She’ll get over it.”

“Hmm.” Geralt swallows hard. “Can we find somewhere more private? I want to talk to you.”

Jaskier blinks, but leads them away anyway until they are by the side of the road, the celebrating crowd and the orange glow of candlelight in the distance.

“Here to make sure I end up someone else’s problem, aren’t you? Don’t worry, in about half an hour, I will be legally required to only bother Valdo for the rest of eternity.” Jaskier nudges Geralt in the shoulder, a jasmine slipping by his ear.

Geralt rights it without thinking, his fingers trembling.

Gods, he can’t say it. He can’t. Jaskier is so happy and Geralt will only ruin their friendship. His second chance is too precious to be risked—

“No, actually,” Geralt heaves out a breath, his heart pounding. “The opposite."

Jaskier snorts, “And, my dear witcher, what is the opposite?”

Here it goes.

“I am in love with you.”

The words sink into the silence. Geralt’s world narrows down to the steady rise and fall of Jaskier’s chest and the little hitch in his breathing. In the darkness of the night, Jaskier’s eyes stay in the shadows, his emotions obscured.

“No, you are not.” When he finally answers, it comes out in a snort. “Ha! A good one, Geralt! And they say witchers don’t have a sense of humor, idiots!”

Jaskier lets out another dry laugh, although the waver in his voice betrays everything.

“I am,” Geralt stresses again, “in love with you, Jaskier.”

Jaskier is staring, the upturn of his lips freezing into shock, the rise and fall of his chest picking up into a frenzy and suddenly he’s breathing too fast. “You can’t. You just can’t…” Air seems to trap in his lungs and a salty tang of tears hits Geralt full-force.

“I wish I couldn’t love, like what they say, but Jaskier, I can and I do—”

“You can’t do this to me!” Jaskier shouts, crying openly. “No, no! You don’t get to tell me this now! We had twenty years…”

Geralt wants more than anything in the world to pull Jaskier into his arms and wipe away the tears, but the space between them is too great. “I didn’t know for twenty years, Jask. Forgive me. It was only after the mountain that I learned how important you were to me. I couldn’t go on like this—”

“The mountain?” Jaskier chokes out a whimper. “You realized after the mountain? You mean when I bared my heart to you and you stomped on it like it was nothing?”

Geralt shakes his head, the guilt constricting his chest. “I’m sorry. For all the pain I caused you.”

“For months I thought I was but a mistake to you, that you hated me for two decades and couldn’t wait to cast me aside like dirt stuck on your shoes. Do you even know… Geralt, do you have an ounce of idea what I went through?”

Jaskier sways and Geralt catches him in his arms, placing his head on his shoulders and feeling the uncontrollable shakes running down Jaskier’s spine. The sight of Jaskier hurt because of him, again, pains Geralt more than any monster’s claws or talons.

“I love you, Jaskier,” he vows. “You were never nothing to me. You are everything. I was an idiot. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

Jaskier struggles and swats at his shoulders and Geralt takes it all the while murmuring more sweet nothings into his ear. Finally, when Jaskier calms down, it’s with another whimper. “You are an idiot.”

“I am.” Geralt cradles the nape of Jaskier’s neck, running his thumb in circles, soothing the last of the trembling away. “Just one word from you, Jask, I can take you away. You don’t have to marry him. Just give me the word and I’m yours. Gods, I’ve waited for so long for this day. At last, I’m sure of my heart, just as I’m sure of yours.”

He buries into Jaskier’s hair and inhales the grief and the flowers, and something that is distinctly Jaskier, expecting a whispered plea. Just one word from Jaskier and they can start their new life together.

What he doesn’t expect is the way Jaskier goes stiff in his arms and the hand that pushes him away.

The soft moonlight catches a glint in Jaskier’s eyes, and it speaks of determination. “Valdo,” he says, as if in a dream.

“You don’t have to marry him. We can lea—”

“Valdo will be here soon.” Jaskier sniffles and wipes at his tears frantically. His whole face is puffy from crying and there’s no way he can hide it. “It’s almost midnight.”

Geralt’s world comes to a stop.

“What?”

“Get inside, and don’t say anything about this.”

“I don’t understand. Jask, you don’t need to go through this anymore. I’ll give you anything you ask. Just say the words, please,” he begs for the first time in a century, catching Jaskier’s hand.

“I am saying it. Get inside. Sit in the back row and don’t speak to me. Valdo might be able to tell.” With a few deep breaths, Jaskier school his features back to neutral. “Only the gods know how he can read me like an open book.”

Geralt’s blood runs cold. “Do you love him?”

The anguish by the corner of Jaskier’s lips says everything. It remains as he smiles a crooked smile. “He loves me. Oh, Geralt, he loves me. I can’t hurt him like this.”

“I thought,” Geralt looks down in shame. “I thought I knew your heart.”

“I thought I did too.”

“Then why?”

“You weren’t there,” Jaskier shrugs like it’s the easiest explanation. “He was.”

Despite every cell in Geralt’s body screaming against it, he nods and lets go of Jaskier’s hand, allowing his limp fingers to slip from his grasp at last.

Jaskier has asked it of him after all.

He doesn’t know how he got back into the crowd, the warm light only a blur in his vision. Another group is stopping near the hall, among them is the other groom-to-be. Valdo’s worried voice when he sees Jaskier is another blow to Geralt’s chest.

“Oh, Julian, are you crying?”

“Just…too happy.”

There’s the sound of kissing, and Geralt can’t tune it out. He laughs at himself for the masochistic tendencies, but maybe he deserves the torture.

“No more tears. Let’s get married, my love.”

The guests settle, and the music begins.

The happy couple walks towards the altar in the witness of family and friends, and Geralt watches every moment of it.

If the smile on Jaskier’s face is a bit strained as the priest ties the ribbon, no one seems to notice.

---

A big thanks to anon for the prompt! I asked for some one-word or one-sentence prompts and the next thing I knew they were connecting into a whole story.

Each chapter of this story will be based on a prompt, so send in one if you want to steer it in certain directions ;)

Tagging: @wanderlust-t @rockysstupidity @flowercrown-bard​ @alllthequeenshorses @mothmanismyuncle @percy-jackson-is-sexy- @constantlytiredpigeon @behonesthowsmysinging @kitcatkim3 @endless-whump @rey-a-nonbinary-bisexual @llamasdumpsterfire @dapandapod

Please feel free to tell me if you want to be removed or added to the list <3

[regretthatsme]

Looney's Sister - Harry Potter x Fem!Lovegood!Reader

That's right bitches, bros, and nonbinary hoes. I'm back. I'm so happy that I finished a oneshot. AAAAAAHHHHHHHH! I'm sorry I've taken so long to post. But, it's here now!

Harry didn't know when his fondness for Luna's sister, Y/N, started. He just knew that he liked her a lot. They were quite good friends, actually. A few years ago, she saw him struggling with herbology, which just so happened to be Y/N's strong suit. It quite convenient honestly, especially when you consider the fact that Y/N was have issues in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

He knew from the start that his feelings for her were more than platonic. What he didn't expect was for him to fall so hard. But, how could he not when she was so perfect.

Her bubbly personality was so inviting and warm. Her eyes made e/c his favorite color. He adored her laugh; it sounded like a beautiful melody. Her smile was just as stunning.

Godric, I'm whipped, he thought. There was one issue, though. He couldn't for the life of him ask her out, ironic for a Gryffindor. What if she doesn't like me? How do I ask her out?

His mind would race into the late hours of the night, wondering how he would work up the courage to ask her out. He knew she wouldn't like something big and extravagant, for she had trouble processing lots of information at once, much like her sister. Her sister!

Harry wondered how he never thought of asking Luna before. I mean, their personalities mirrored each other almost perfectly. He quickly ran to the forbidden forest. Luna spent most of her time there.

"Hello, Harry." A dreamy voice called to him.

"Hello, Luna."

"Is there a reason you are here?"

"Umm... yeah." Harry's face became very hot suddenly, a stark contrast to the nippy weather that morning. "I-uh. I should probably come right out and say it, shouldn't I?"

"Yes, that would be most appreciated." Luna responded. Harry couldn't tell if she was sarcastic or not.

"I've fallen deeply in love with your sister, and I was wondering if you knew how I could ask her out."

Luna was clear shocked by this revelation. She thought for a few minutes before replying, "I appreciate your honesty, however I cannot say that I am too pleased with it."

Harry's face fell slightly. "What does that mean?"

"Harry, she's recently had her heart broken by another. I'm sorry, but I do not trust you with her love."

-*-*-*-

He knew he shouldn't be over thinking this. He knew that it was pointless. He knew it was only going to give him stress, but he couldn't stop as much as he tried. Who would dare hurt her? Her? The most caring, beautiful person in Hogwarts?

Needless to say, Harry's eyes were sporting some serious under eye bags the next morning.

"Harry, what's wrong?" Asked Hermione during breakfast, noting the discoloration under her friend's eyes.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"He was up late last night." Said his best friend and roommate, Ronald Weasley.

"No, I wasn't, Ron."

"Okay. Fine. You went to bed at a reasonable time." Ron said before turning to Hermione and mouthing No he didn't. Harry was about to retaliate before a small body sat down next to him. A dreamy voice rendered his speech effectively useless as a flush filled his cheeks.

"Hello Hermione, Ron. Good morning, Harry." She addressed each individually, as she always does. "How are we this morning?"

Ron smirked a small bit at his friend's face. "Oh, I'm splendid." He remarked, chuckling slightly at his friend's state. "What about you, Harry?"

Y/N seemed to perk up at the name. Her head turned to him, only now noticing the rosy hue on his cheeks. "Oh dear, you don't look so well." Her voice was distinctly quieter, almost as if she only wanted him to hear. Her hand slowly came up to feel his forehead. "You're absolutely scalding! And it's clear you haven't gotten any sleep."

She panicked slightly.

Ron tried to hold in a laugh. "Oh, yes. Harry was hacking and wheezing last night. It was horrible."

Harry's eyes were about the size of saucers. "What are you doing?" He whispered.

"Trust me." He mouthed back.

"He's in no shape to go to class. Someone must take care of him." Harry just realized what Ron was trying to do. Wanker.

"I would, but Hermione and I have a test first period." Hermione nodded too, quickly becoming aware of his scheme. "Looks like you're going to need to take care of him. I really wish I could help."

Y/N's eyes never left Harry's face. "Be sure to tell the teachers about Harry's predicament." She said as she dragged him out of the great hall, despite his protests. She knew the password was as she was a frequenter of the Gryffindor common room. He was led to his dorm and was forced onto the bed.

"Y/N, I'm gonna tell you one more time. I'm not-"

"Shhhhhh." She cut him off. "Harry, relax. I can't remember the last time you did." She did have a point. He couldn't remember the last time he had a stress free hour, much less day. "I'm going to go to the kitchen and whip up something. Get some rest, alright?" He nodded his head. His eyelids slowly fluttered and closed. He didn't really dream, but he felt a sort of presence. It felt like a giant hug.

He didn't know how long he had been asleep, but he woke to the sound of Y/N closing his bedroom door. "I made a soup with some clowort root mixed in. It should help with your symptoms." She said. "And, there is some water to wash it all down."

"You never cease to amaze me." He said rather bluntly in his sleepy delirium. He took a spoonful of the soup. It tasted quite like the food in the great hall, but there was something distinctly different from it. There was an unmistakable taste of... home. He quickly went for more.

"Slow down, Harry!" Y/N's volume raised ever so slightly. "Consuming large amounts of clowort root can lead to some unwanted side effects."

"Like what?"

She gestured for him to lead forward, as if telling him a secret. "People tend to make quite irrational decisions when copious amounts of clowort are in their system." She pulled back and gave a stern yet loving gaze.

"I don't know. I've eaten a decent amount and I don't feel a thing." He said indifferently. She simply rolled her eyes and looked away from him.

"Hey. I uh... I heard from Luna that you had some trouble with a boy and I'm here if you need to talk or anything." He knew that he probably shouldn't invite his crush to talk openly about a romantic partner she had, but he would listen to her talk about anything and everything just to hear her voice.

"Oh. It's nothing. Just a stupid fling that hadn't even lasted a month." Y/N said, her eyes becoming more solemn looking.

"It's just... if I had a girlfriend," especially one as perfect as you, "I would treat her better than that."

"I can see the brash decision making has already taken effect." Y/N jokes lightly, but only was laughing at it.

"I'm serious, you know." He said, grabbing her hand and lacing her fingers through his.

"Harry, you're not thinking straight-"

"Ever since we met each other and you helped me with your helped me with my homework. You were so kind."

"Harry, please don't-"

"I understand if you don't feel the same way, I wouldn't be so keen on falling in love someone who nearly dies every other weekend either, but I needed you to-"

"Harry." Her voice was ferm enough to cut off his incoherent ramblings. Her thumb brushed against the back of his hand. "You're not well. You're saying things you don't mean-"

"No, I'm not-"

"Harry, I can't have my heart broken again." Her eyes held a certain glossiness to it that he hadn't seen before. Her voice was almost breaking. "You are amazing and sweet and beautiful and... well, words can hardly describe how much I admire you. But," Her eyes darted around the room, trying to avoid eye contact. "You're just doing this because you're sick and under the influence. You don't mean it-"

"Yes, I do!" Harry giggled slightly. He was getting a bit frustrated at this point. "What do I have to do to prove it to you?"

She looked deep into his emerald eyes. They say eyes are the window to the soul, and they weren't lying. Every emotion, every thought running through his pretty head, everything could be seen in them. It was so intense, she could only make eye contact for a few seconds.

"Nothing." Y/N whispered. Harry's head snapped to her. "I believe you, Harry." They sat in silence for a while, processing the revelation that just took place. It was a bit awkward. Okay, very awkward. The apprehension of the unknown was creeping upon them. Now what? Where do we go from here?

Harry was the first to make a move. He held his arm out, inviting her join him on his, rather small in hindsight, bed. She happily accepted and curled into his side. She was practically on top of him due to the size of the bed, yet he couldn't be happier. Neither could she.

Bonus:

"HARRY JAMES POTTER, WHAT ON EARTH DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING?" Y/N was positive that Luna's cries could be heard throughout the entire castle.

"Luna, please calm down-" She tried to console.

"GET AWAY FROM MY SISTER!"