#his mcnugget won..

[fernando-jpg]

🥹🥹🥹

[minlahzz]

gold relationship headcanons.

requested.

apart of a big request i took seriously, because it has my favorite characters. hi, hi, yes this is long it's gold what do you expect. i love my goldilocks princess that fought literal God and won 💛... gold is my absolute favorite if you haven't noticed, so I'm so sorry if this is longer or has more things written in it. i have obvious favoritism and i am not ashamed. (joke)

— NOTE LOWERCASE INTENDED.

gold is well, gold. chaotic, reckless, and probably the most fun you’ll ever have in a relationship, but also the most exhausting. dating him is like signing up for a rollercoaster ride that breaks halfway through, but somehow you both survive and laugh about it later.

gold thrives on energy and banter, so he’d love someone who can keep up with his antics and throw them right back at him. he’s drawn to people who are confident, witty, and not afraid to call him out when he’s being ridiculous. at the same time, he needs someone who can see through his bravado and appreciate the softer, more vulnerable side he rarely shows.

his sense of humor is both a blessing and a curse. gold will make you laugh until your stomach hurts, but he also doesn’t know when to quit. sometimes his jokes go too far, and you’ll have to remind him to dial it back, but he’s quick to apologize when he realizes he’s crossed a line.

he’s surprisingly good at comforting you when you’re upset, though. he’ll crack a dumb joke to make you laugh, then listen (for once) and promise to help however he can. he is pretty optimistic about life, and looks for the good in bad, gold will always find a solution for your problem. it might take him hours or months, but he'll do it!

gold will turn everything into a competition, whether it’s who can catch the most pokemon in an hour or who can eat the most pokepuffs without passing out. he hates losing, but if it’s to you, he’ll (grudgingly) let it slide. he'd deny everything though. "you got lucky.", "i let you win that!"

he loves impressing you. whether it’s a crazy trick shot with his billiard cue or pulling off a risky move in battle, gold lives for the “wow” factor. he’ll always look over to make sure you’re watching, and when he does accomplish his goal he just has a smug look on his face.

gold isn’t the most observant when it comes to emotions or subtle hints. you’ll have to spell things out for him sometimes, but once he gets it, he’ll try his best to make it right. SOMETIMES he already realized what you're talking about, but still acts confused to annoy you.

he's a flirt, it gets kind of annoying hearing him call you unhinged names. he'll never run out of names to call you! ex : chicken mcnugget... if you complain about it he'll overreact and then double down by making it even more weird.

gold's pokemon love you if you’re kind to them, but they will side with gold during an argument. his aipom is the ultimate wingman. it’ll “accidentally” push you closer to gold or steal your hat so he can give it back with a shit eating grin. his typhlosion is basically his partner in crime. it’s just as chaotic as he is, and they’ll gang up on you for pranks if you’re not careful.

hes energetic, chaotic, and hard headed. its a recipe for disaster. he has pro's and con's, although he does admit faults it takes him a hard time to work on things. he's improving though!

gold is a cheerful kid. he's got alot of pro's, despite being insane and chaotic gold IS mature when the situation needs it.

he makes you laugh. gold has a knack for turning any situation into a comedy show. he’ll pull dumb pranks, make terrible puns, and do the most absurd things just to see you smile.

gold is your personal hype man. when you're at doubt or self conscious he'll always be there to support your decisions. if you burned down the city he'll be on your side, like a personal lawyer. (jk)

he’s surprisingly kind. behind the cocky grin and loud personality, gold has a heart of gold (ahahahhaha do you get it, okay ill die). he’ll do small, thoughtful things for you.

he’s really good with pokemon, and it’s one of the things that makes him stand out. baby pokemon especially love him.

he's also very reckless, don't forget that. if you like him then you have to be very patient in order to deal with his nonsense.

he’s reckless. gold doesn’t think before he acts, and you’ll probably spend a lot of time worrying about him diving headfirst into danger (and dragging you along)

gold is very honest, and his mouth barely has filter. he might accidentally say something mean or word his sentences incorrectly, this can lead to arguments.

he doesn’t know when to stop. whether it’s teasing you, pushing boundaries, or pulling pranks, gold doesn’t always realize when he’s gone too far. you have to set firm boundaries.

he’s emotionally immature. gold has a hard time dealing with serious feelings. if something’s bothering him, he’ll joke about it or avoid the topic entirely until it blows up in his face.

-

rating gold as a partner: 6.5/10 he’s fun, loyal, and will make you laugh like no one else, but he’s also immature, reckless, and doesn’t always know how to handle serious situations. I still love him though 💛

[hocksburn]

#Okay so FUNNY STORY. About four or five promotions BEFORE the McNugget Minute? Caps fans actually got... discounted lasik eye surgery. #Like I think there were two varieties #One was if the Caps scored a goal during the last two minutes of the second period a randomly chosen fan won free lasik #There was another one where if the Caps did the same thing everyone in the stadium got like two hundred bucks discount for lasik

HEY. HI PREV. SORRY. THE WHAT NOW. everyone get in my clown car we're goin to get our eyeballs zapped

listening to caps broadcast as an appetizer for sharks broadcast and

y'all have a fuckin MCNUGGET MINUTE???? casters out of nowhere hitting me with the mcnugget minute.

"tom wilson is hot" these commentators r real as fuck

[tennant-the-tigger]

AU Work placement: Local Daycare - Never Fear!

Steve was struggling to connect with the kids at the daycare, Robin tells him to just act himself and have fun because no one here would judge him. While Eddie just snorts and tells him to step off his throne and just act like a kid. Desperate for change, Steve does just that. And when they were tasked to put on a performance for the kids, He actively volunteers to be the knight and put on one hell of a performance. Eddie was baffled, he never thought he would see the day that, the almightly jock, the 'Hair' Harrington, King Steve himself would volunteer to dress up and play pretend in front of kids. But here Eddie was, wearing a princess crown while watching the sun shine.

My Stranger Things Art | Steve’s Mcnuggets | Part 1

[lansplaining]

QiJiuLiu - accidental soul bond au

Or if that's not your cup of tea

QiJiu + Qiu JianLuo - calamity vs calamity 🥺🥺

anon i got SO excited because i misread the first one as including shen yuan and i was like they know it's a soul bond because they begin to experience an insatiable desire for a mysterious food called a chicken mcnugget

but okay setting that aside WRECK THAT GUY

GHOST BATTLE

Shen Jiu and OG!YQY become ghosts after death-- Shen Jiu for obvious reasons, YQY because of the resentment that grows from unresolved longing and his sadness at never fulfilling his promise to Shen Jiu. Shortly after they achieve Savage status, Mount Tonglu opens. Shen Jiu is determined to become a ghost king, YQY is determined to follow him and refuses to accept that there can only be one winner. If nothing else, he reasons, he'll help Shen Jiu be the last man standing.

But Qiu Jianluo has also grown powerful since dying, and is finally the last ghost standing in the Kiln against QiJiu. And they fuckin' beat his ass. Then there is some hurt/comfort in the Kiln, and as they realize that it's not going to open while there are still two of them YQY is like, well, go on then. I offered to let you kill me once and you said it wouldn't matter, but it will matter now, so go for it. Shen Jiu makes as if to do it, but can't, won't. But the knowledge that Shen Jiu doesn't actually want him dead soothes the longing that is tying YQY to the world, and he begins to dissipate. The Kiln opens. Shen Jiu won.

The newly crowned Ghost King named [see these replies for some sick ideas] immediately goes on a rampage. The foliage of every tree in a hundred-mile radius turns to blades an eviscerates anyone who steps near. The gods assume it's a new ghost king announcing himself. Hua Cheng does not want gege to have to go deal with some upstart, so he approaches Shen Jiu with information (because Hua Cheng knows everything): YQY's soul can't pass on. His ashes and his life force are tied to the Xuan Su sword. Find the shards, piece them together, and you'll have what you want. Now calm down.

He begins his search.

[trivialbob]

This afternoon I went to an American Legion and played bingo with my SIL. Sometimes bingo players agree to split winnings with others at the same table. Historically, I never split. Today I felt nice and offered to split with her. My SIL declined! She won one game. I came home a loser. Wise woman she was.

My SIL and an elderly woman, both bingo experts, monitored my bingo cards throughout the session. The older woman twice pointed out when I missed dobbing a number (I was playing nine squares). My SIL alerted me when I was one number away from bingo. I loved it.

Something awesome about this Legion post, besides the M1903 Springfield rifle mounted above the bar, is that 16 oz. cans of Surly or Waconia Brewing beers cost less than a pint of the same beer at those breweries. Which is why I like gambling at the Legion. It didn’t hurt that today the Legion served homemade sloppy joes and French fries. Yum.The bun were even toasted.

This evening I desired another beer. My wife is traveling. That’s fine. Sometimes I like going to the a brewery by myself. I can’t handle all three dogs alone, so I rolled the dice. Sulley won.

On our way to the brewery we stopped at McDonald’s for chicken McNuggets. My dogs love those things (shhhhh, don’t tell Oliver and Ella). My truck’s window was frozen shut so I skipped the drive-thru and went inside to order. I haven’t been inside a McDonald’s since COVID first came into the news.

Damn, things there have changed. This place totally remodeled. Two kiosks replaced two cash registers I ordered at a kiosk, and it was slick. Fast too.

With nuggets in hand, Sulley and I drove to the brewery. I ended up getting a coffee stout and the brewery’s latest offering, a peanut butter honey and banana ale. I could really taste the banana. Both beers were good.

Sulley and I split the nuggets. As we ate, a little girl and her mom came in. The mom instructed the girl to ask if she could pet the dog.

Of course!

I said his name is Sulley. “Oh! Like Monsters, Inc!” she giggled. Exactly, because he has a blue merle coat and one blue eye. That went over the child’s head, but she was still happy to pet the dog.

After the nuggets were gone Sulley laid down on the floor to nap, and I read a magazine.

[vigil4nted]

"This is because I said your music sucks, isn't it." It's Freddy. He's standing with his fists on his hips, positively fuming. He's taken notice of the perfectly unscathed Nancy, it seems! "Ya cucked me, dude. Not cool, bro."

@inhuman-hearts​ | hak ji-woon

     “ AH, IF I didn’t know better, I’d say the burnt McNugget is mad. ” A deliberate dramatic pause. “ No wait, you are mad. Look at you ! What’s the matter ? Didn’t get what you wanted ? Gonna go cry to mommy about it ? ” Snide remarks with a gloating smirk. Oh, he knows what he’s done. He’s won.

[idgaf-rl]

The Swedes in Japan headcanons

They got assigned a mission in Japan

Otto and Axel bumps into doorframes a lot, sometimes they can't even fit the room door.

Say no no to capsule hotels.

Since they don't speak Japanese they got confused the whole time.

Oscar is lowkey a secret weeb and bold of you to think Otto isn't a weeb to.

Oscar got a waifu keychain that he hides from his brothers.

He secretly calls cats "neko".

He also has a small thing for Neko girls.

Axel is slightly disappointed in him.

They went to vist the cat shrine in Tashirojima and none of them wanted to leave.

Oscar got himself a cat print blanket but insisted it was a joke. We all know it isn't, he'd never be caught in it though.

They bought a goldfish.

The triplets got pissed that the motel doesn't allow any animals.

So they went on for Airbnb.

Axel was the only one who took care of the gold fish.

After the mission they went to a hot spring ( you know these boys love hot springs, and saunas too ).

Once again the stool in the shower was too small for Otto he almost fell down while sitting on it.

Okay hear me out: AXEL IN A YUKATA.

They had a small competition to see who would last longer in the onsen.

Otto initiates to win from Oscar.

Axel didn’t want to join but they managed to persuade him.

Which was their downfall because he won.

Their next stop was Nara park, Otto got surrounded and followed by deers for the pancakes he bought at the gate.

Some crows tried to steal Oscar's sweet potatoes.

If they were in Hokkaido they would get some delicious seafood.

These boy live for seafood and seafood only.

But they also like fast food, catched these three ordering McNuggets at 2 a.m once.

Axel insisted on trying out fugu . It's risky but they're assassins after all, what could be worse ?

They never got to try any new food before joining the Commission because they were poor and couldn't get any "good" food so they travel through time to try everything.

------------------------------------------------------

Credits goes to: @h0ly-fire and @chrinic-geadcake . We had fun brainstorming these headcanons together.

[susssoo]

Midnight trip to McDonald’s

Pairing: Park Jaehyung and Younghyun Kang

Genre: fluff, college au, late night antics

A/N: I really wanted to write something with just Jae and Brian, so here you go. Enjoy ;)

If Younghyun could ask for anything in the world, right now, it’d be a burger. Specifically from McDonald’s.

It’s an odd request, he knows, but it’s 2 in the morning, he has several deadlines he has to meet before Friday, and he’s freaking the fuck out.

And the only thing that could make him feel better is a burger, from McDonald’s specifically.

And he knows only one person who’d be willing to take him.

Park Jaehyung.

He closes his laptop, and places it to the side. He searches for his phone through a mess of papers spread lazily across his desk, after hours of frustration. But when he finally finds it, he sees it’s only at 12 percent and groans inwardly.

He’ll have to charge it later, because right now he only wants one thing and one thing only.

A burger, and to see his boyfriend.

Okay, so maybe two things.

He goes to his contacts, clicking on Jae’s and pressing call.

After it rings a couple times, someone finally picks up.

“Jaeeeeee~” Younghyun says sweetly over the phone.

“BriBri, It’s 2 in the morning, shouldn’t you be sleeping?” He questions.

“I’m hungry, and I can’t finish this stupid fucking project and I need food and to see you right or I might actually break something.”

There’s silence for a moment, before Jae speaks once again.

“McDonald’s?”

“Please.”

“Okay, I’ll be there in five.” He remarked, Younghyun could hear him over the phone shuffling around, probably searching for his keys and a hoodie.

“Thanks Jae, I love you.”

“I love you too, meet me outside the dormitory.”

After that, the call ended, and Younghyun practically beaming.

He quickly stood up from his chair, nearly falling over as his limbs protested him after being seated for nearly 10 hours.

He ignored it, grabbing his keys and a hoodie and making his way to the front of the campus.

~

Younghyun had been sitting in front of the campus for half an hour and he was beginning to think that Jae had fallen asleep, but not a moment later, a tall, lengthy blonde could be seen sprinting towards him.

Jae immediately engulfed him in a hug, apologizing profusely for being so late.

“I’m so sorry, as I was walking to the front, I saw security so I was basically running around like a fucking mad man trying not to get caught.” He huffed out, wiping the sweat on his forehead away with the back of his free hand, as his other arm was wrapped comfortably around the younger waste.

Younghyun cackled at the elder and his antics.

“Don’t worry about it, at least he didn’t see you, that could’ve been a shit show.”

“You’re telling me, I nearly had a heart attack!” He exclaimed, making gestures with his hand.

The two stood there for a moment, in comfortable silence just enjoying each other’s presence.

“So, McDonald’s?” Jae said, breaking whatever trance the younger had been in.

“Fucking please.”

~

The pair had decided they were going to walk, since Jae had forgotten the keys to his car (typical Jae, but he loved him regardless of his forgetfulness) and Younghyun didn’t even have one at the moment.

They spent the walk talking about nothing in particular, hands eloped in the others, enjoying the frigid night.

“God, You’re such an emotional drunk. Clingy too.” Jae provoked.

Younghyun scoffed, hitting the older on this chest playfully.

“I am not!”

“Really? I specifically remember after Youngjae’s party, you cried the entire way back to campus, and then when we got to my room, you were upset because we didn’t get McDonald’s and then you started crying again, so I had to turn on animal planet until you eventually knocked out. You almost threw Youngjae’s espresso machine at Wonpil!” Jae retorted, before breaking out into bouts of laughter.

“Okay, but that’s because he called me a bottom! I’m not a fucking bottom!” He pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You in bed the other night moaning my name said-“

Younghyun stopped walking, glaring at the older.

Jae threw is arms up, surrendering.

“I mean, no, of course not.”

The younger broke out into toothy grin, and resumed walking once again.

~

Nearly 20 minutes later, they finally arrived a McDonald’s. It was empty, besides the cashier behind the counter, wearing a bored expression. They entered the building, and walked towards the counter to place their orders.

“Hi, welcome to McDonald’s, what can I get for you today?” The employee forced a smile onto their face, but their weary tone betrayed them.

“Hm, can we get two large cups, with two Big Macs and 10 piece McNuggets, with a side of fries.” Younghyun replied, digging into the pockets of his sweatpants for his wallet.

“Sure, will that be all for you?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Alright, that will be 15,470 won.”

Younghyun handed her his credit card. She took it, swiping through the machine behind the counter and then handing it back to him, with a receipt, and two large cups.

The two walked towards the drink machines, Younghyun filling his cup with a sprite, while Jae got himself an iced tea. They both made their way to a empty table near the back of the restaurant, and sat down across each other.

“Thanks. Honestly, I really needed this.” Younghyun blurted out, looking at the older thankfully.

“You don’t need to thank me Bri, you know I’d do anything for you.” Jae responded, a smile making its way onto his face.

Younghyun grinned, enveloping the others hand into his own.

~

10 minutes later, their food is finally ready. Jae gets up from the table, going to the counter to grab their food.

Younghyun’s mouth is practically watering, hungry would be an understatement of words, he’s ravenous.

Jae sits back down, placing the tray on the table.

He immediately grabs his burger off the tray, quickly unwrapping it, and taking a bite.

The younger leans back in his seat, letting out an unintentional moan.

“It’s so fucking good.” He says, mouth still full of food.

Jae stares at him for a moment, amused, before beginning to eat his own food.

They eat their meals in silence, because when Younghyun is really invested in something, there is no breaking his concentration, and he’s really invested in this burger, as he’s already finished with half of it.

Jae smiles to himself, Younghyun looks so adorable, even with a face full of food.

30 minutes later, Younghyun has finally finished his meal and is now sitting in the booth, half asleep, hunched over the table.

Jae still has half his fries left, but it doesn’t seem like he’ll be able to eat much more as his stomach is practically bulging from his sweatpants.

He looks up at the younger, and sees his current state.

“Yo Bri, you good?” He asks, putting all the trash onto the tray.

“I’m tired, that was really good. It was so good it took all the energy out of me, and now I want to sleep” He murmurs, still hunched over the table.

Jae cackles, before getting up to throw the thrash away.

He walks back over to the table, carding his fingers through Younghyun’s hair.

“Well, we’re about to leave. You want to sleep with me tonight?”

Younghyun only nods, getting up from the booth and lacing his fingers into the elders.

“Okay.”

They leave the restaurant, and begin walking back to the campus in silence. Although he may not say it all the time, but Younghyun truly does adore his boyfriend. And it’s moments like these, that only makes him adore him more.

~

[cannedapricot]

Road Trip with! NCT Dream

the album,,,,,,, the mv,,,,,, i’m soft don’t touch me,,,,,,,,,,,, here’s a road trip au based on their mv to let my uwus out. also this gif makes me hella emo

hello

so i know school has started in most countries

but for this au, pretend that you’re still on summer vacation!!

aka what i wish i was on rn ugh

anyways!!

high schoolers! dream!!!

except-

mark’s already graduated high school

and will head off to his uni after the summer ends

then donghyuck, jeno, jaemin and renjun’s gonna graduate before next year summer

which really means

that it’s gonna be the last summer of your crew as high schoolers

this thought didn’t really go through your head until a week before school starts

when the 00 line fucking shows up at your door with their bags already packed

and bright smiles

you’re just like-

????when did we agree on a sleepover????

“hEY YOU UP FOR A ROAD TRIP TO COMMEMORATE OUR LAST SUMMER AS HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS?”

“uh-”

“come on, dear y/n, it’s not like you were planning on doing anything else”

you eyes narrow 

becaUSE DID THEY JUST ASSUME YOU HAD NOTHING TO DO

i mean,,,, they’re right tho,,,,, all you’ve done all summer is laze at home because it’s way too hot outside,,,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,,,,,

“can,,,,, you even drive tho”

“hahHAHAHAHAHAH DONGHYUCK? DRIVE?” 

“i even don’t trust him with my fish what makes you think i trust him with the wheel”

“okAY JUST BECAUSE I FAILED MY DRIVING TEST TWICE DOESN’T MEAN YOU GUYS CAN BULLY ME”

fuck no one’s sane here

but what’d you really expect from two jocks and two art geeks

the same jocks and geeks that pushed you back into your own home and watched as you packed

wipes away tear

“why am i always forced to do dumb shit with you guys”

“whAT DO YOU MEAN????”

and so you were pushed out the door after having a word with your parents

who only agreed to let you go cause they deemed renjun trust worthy

because he’s the only one who at least acts normal around your parents

“whoSE CAR ARE WE EVEN U S I N G- oh”

right on the curb parked mark’s old and stuttering blue car.

on which he sat in the driver’s seat, trying to get the old thing to play music

“are you sure we’re not gonna die”

“nope, but it’s the only car we have available”

jeno whispered in response, throwing your bag in the trunk

“ah, y/n, i see you’ve been successfully dragged into hyuck’s dumb idea”

donghyuck climbs into the passenger seat next to mark, 

flipping his friend off in the proccess

“you are all here because we are all friends and we love each other”

you, being squashed in the back seat:

“no - not really”

“wtf jaemin there’s another row of seats in the back stOP TRYING TO PUSH ME OUT”

“BUT I WANNA SIT WITH Y/N????”

“fucking donghyuck”

“WHY ME???? WHAT HAVE I DONE????”

wow great start to your trip 10/10

picking up chenle and jisung literally took five seconds

they lived next to each to each other

and it only took one excited nod from chenle for jisung to tag along

and that’s the story of how you ending up being in a shotty blue car with seven teenage boys

miles from home on an empty ass road

screaming the lyrics to micheal jackson songs into the heat (thanks to dj haechan)

at least mark got the speakers to work again

“wherE ARE WE EVEN GOING???”

“IDK LOL”

“WAIT WHATTHEFUCJ-”

at one point, jisung and chenle at the back decided to sit up onto the car, with their legs on their seats

“I’M PRETTY SURE THAT’S ILLEGAL AND DANGEROUS”

“yOlO!!1!1!!!1”

“how the fuck do i disown them”

“push them off”

everything was going swimmingly

until the car breaks down in the middle of the road

“i knew this was gonna happen sighs”

mark then jumps out to check the hood

then immediately notices something wrong rip

“hyuck, pass me the box in the glove box.”

“you’re prepared???? does this happen often or????”

so mark tries to fix the car in the blistering heat with renjun nagging beside him, holding an umbrella to hide the two of them from the sun

whilst the rest of you start playing uno on the back of the car

multiple times, not once, buT MULTIPLE TIMES

CHENLE HAS LOOKED AT YOUR CARDS

HE’S DOESN’T EVEN TRY DEFEND HIMSELF WHEN YOU POINT IT OUT

WHAT A LITTLE SNAKE

“FOR FUCKS SAKE ZHONG CHENLE IF U DON’T STOP I SWEAR-”

jisung won every round 

which made the rest of you bond trying to break his win streak

“jeno do you have a plus four to screw him up with”

“i only have a green plus two if that helps”

and that kinda goes on until mark lee emerges from behind the raised hood, telling y’all to give the car a push

“yeah just a second, jisung’s finally losing-”

“hA YOU THOUGHT”

THROWS DOWN FIVE NINES

INFURIATING

everyone grumbles as they hop off and start pushing

“lets just put our rage into pushing this stupid car”

which ends up moving easier than y’all thought it would

so the seven of you stumble a little when the car started moving by itself

mark nearly drove away himself lmao

made the group of you chase after the car for a moment lmAO

you wished he did drive off though because the second the car starting moving with everyone back on,

he yells,

“lET’S GET IT”

“siri where’s the nearest bus stop to get home”

“HSEGFSUEF NO I’M SORRY :C”

then as the day slowly got darker,

your screams didn’t die down lol

the latest feud was over chocolate vs vanilla

and you honestly think about how you got stuck in a group of dumbasses

“remember when hyuck hated jaemin and jeno back in freshman year lol”

“nO SHUT UP RENJUN”

“LMAO DIDN’T HYUCK DISLIKE THEM BECAUSE THEY CHUCKED A BASKETBALL AT HIS HEAD”

“what you still remember that? i’m sorry hyuck :’cccccc”

“NO JENO I’VE FORGIVEN YOU AGES AGO- FUCKING RENJUN-”

the group of dumbasses did make you laugh though

so maybe it wasn’t so bad

night then came and the conversation finally started to tone down

mark pulls to the side of the road 

“let’s call it a night, yeah?”

the rest of you mumble in agreement

“our last summer as high schoolers huh”

you hum, running your hands through jaemin’s freshly dyed candyfloss hair

“but will anything change even if you guys graduate?”

chenle asks from the back, head on jisung’s shoulder

“not much, i don’t think. we just won’t see each other as much.”

it was a clear night, and the stars were brighter than ever

everyone was staring up at the night sky, enjoying the cool breeze

“we always have summer right?”

a round of agreement sounded before jeno cuts through-

“does this mean we’re going on another road trip next year?”

“way to ruin the mood jeno”

“oh please no, i don’t think i can handle another one with you dumb fucks”

lies

you loved every moment with them

“this is a cute moment and all, but can jaemin get off of us now?”

renjun asked, referring to the long boy sprawled on top of jeno, renjun and you

“i was planning on sleeping in this position tho-”

he didn’t get to finish his sentence before the three of you pushed him off

mark chuckled before leaving his seat to pull the hood over the open seats

“good night”

you were shook awake by mark the next day, greeted with a sky that wasn’t even awake

“what’s going on?”

“fancy watching the sunrise?”

turns out, mark woke up earlier than the rest of you and drove to an empty beach to watch the sunrise together :’)))))))

you stumbled out of the car, legs soft from sitting for too long, finding the rest of the boys sitting on the hood of the car and on the concrete in front

donghyuck pats the space next to him and you hop on top of the creaky car

“is this safe”

“probably not”

“ o h “

it’s all quiet before the sun starts coming up

then gasps were heard and wishes were made

and it was all heartwarming :”)))))

before all of you made a dash to the cold ass water

trying to chuck mark in

“whY ME????? I DROVE Y’ALL HERE”

“YOU’RE LEAVING THAT’S WHY”

“SBRGOSBEGOSBAE??????”

S P L O S H

chenle was screaming the entire time

then one idiot cough hyuck cough accidentally chucks sand into mark’s blue car

which then leads to mark pulling the squad into a self wash station

“come one guys let’s wash this car together!!1!1! wE’rE aLl In ThIs ToGeThEr”

“wow i suddenly dont know you”

then some idiot coUGH HYUCK COUGH starts chucking suds at everyone

AND JAEMIN’S LOWKEY TRIGGERED BECAUSE NOT HIS NEW HAIR

SO HE FIRES BACK

AND RENJUN WHO WANTED TO HOSE THE SUDS OUT OF HIS HAIR ENDED UP FIRING WATER AT CHENLE’S FACE

EVERYONE STARTED LAUGHING LIKE NO TOMORROW AND YOU GOT A GOOD VIDEO OF IT LMAO

AND EVERYTHING JUST ENDED UP WITH EVERYONE GETTING A FREE SHOWER AT THE STATION

and renjun getting pinned to the car by jeno but u h 👀👀👀👀👀👀 

y’all end up drying yourselves by sitting under the hand dryers in the bathroom

“at least we don’t have to worry about showering”

“hyuck you started this shut up”

hopping back into the small car, the group decides to start heading back

mainly because your snack supplies were running low

but also because you don’t think the car’s gonna survive any longer

but mostly because snacks were running out

“chenle ate all the fucking pocky”

“nO JISUNG DID”

“WTF-”

“i love best friends throwing each other under the bus”

taking a shorter route home, you stop at a basketball court to move a around for a while

“why is jaemin and jeno on one team, they’re the star basketballers of our school tf i call bs”

“you literally picked your own team-”

nomin vs the rest of u fuckers

no surprise, nomin won

now you guys owe them mcnuggets

“hA SU C C”

“let’s leave them behind quiCK TO THE CAR”

mark: trips over own laces running

in no time, you were in front of your own house again

unlike before though, you lowkey didn’t want to leave your friends

“i still can’t believe that we ran out of snacks in a day and a half-”

“blame chenle”

“hEY-”

renjun pats your shoulder as jeno and jaemin go get your bag for you

“we’ll be living and sleeping at mark’s place until he leaves. you’re welcome to join”

mark from the driver’s seat: what.

and as they drive away with mark questioning when this was decided,

you head back inside to restock you bag, leaving for mark’s house just a few hours later

when high school started up again, you weren’t surprised to see renjun having chensung in headlock in front of your locker

whilst hyuck just whispers-

“right in front of my goddamn salad” at the sight

creaking open your locker, the first thing you do is stick up a group photo taken on your trip

nomin lean on your shoulders, craning their neck to look at the photo

“we look dumb”

the picture was taken by mark setting a timer on his phone then running to join the picture 

everyone was lined up, leaning against the old blue car against the sunrise

but mark bumped into haechan who bumped into jeno, who bumped into jaemin etc etc

and the picture ended up coming out with everyone slanting as y’all fell in a domino effect

but the smiles on your faces were precious :’))))))))

“i think it’s cute” 

you say, closing your locker, ready to face another year with these fuckers.

hi i’m apri and i present to you yet another unedited piece of shit :’)

listening to the dreamies’ album while writing this made me really emo about mark’s graduation so it got really deep in the middle im s o r r y

[mooosicaldreamz]

idk how you & lynne are able to write so much. tbh y’all are a blessing. i did a random # generator for the things u said prompts so i’m submitting 40 for supercorp!

according to lynne i have sucked up all the inspiration in the apt, which is apparently a finite resource, so i guess i will be the one producing any writing today…….anyway here it goes. things i said when you met my parents. @narraboths said there was only one choice when i was given this prompt. 

One second, Kara is flipping Lena’s omelette over in the pan with careful and steady precision, dancing to the Real Estate song pouring out of Lena’s way-too-big sound system, when the door opens.

It’s been three months of dating, two blissful months of having great sex, one month since Lena had insisted Kara take a key to her large off-campus apartment and told her to go get milk and kale on the way back from her radio journalism class. Kara had got the milk, some cookies, a giant bouquet of shitty grocery store flowers, and forgotten the kale, but Lena had kissed her anyway.

She had met Lena freshman year in their shared Intro to 18th Century Lit class, and they had been through a lot of nonsense to get to here - Kara had dated this shitty dude named Mike, Lena had nearly blown up their friendship group by dating James for three weeks sophomore year. But Kara had felt it this past summer, while Lena fell asleep on the phone because she was in Turkey with her brother and Kara listened. It would be this year that they would figure it out.

They had, and that was awesome. What was not awesome was Kara turning away from the electric stovetop and seeing someone other than Lena in the doorway, while wearing an FBI t-shirt reading Female Body Inspector (gifted from her sister in a fit of drunken Amazon shopping) and boxers covered in tiny little flying cupids. Last night, when Lena had taken them off of her before giving her some inspired head, she had said they were cute.

The woman with brown hair and a Valentino bag did not look like she would share such an opinion. Kara recognizes her immediately, of course. Her first instinct is to punch the woman, because Lena had just finished a phone call with her mother that set her in such a mood that she demanded Kara drive to the dispensary just on the edge of campus and buy some edibles. They had sat in the dark and watched Mighty Morphin Power Rangers and then when that had worn off, Lena had cried and Kara had kissed her face all over.

“I didn’t realize Lena had a roommate,” Lillian Luthor, drawing to her full height. She’s taller than Kara, serene-looking and unperturbed. Kara was very perturbed, because she was wearing boxers and had nothing as smart as that to say back, besides a colorful string of curse words.

The door opens again. Lillian sidesteps the wide arc it makes as Lena barrels in without looking up from her bag.

“Darling, I hope some of that food is for me, because I’m starving, and I think my mother wants to have dinner with me tonight-“

Kara makes a strangled noise. Lena looks up her way and the smile on her face is pretty enough that Kara forgets that her mother is watching and smiles back. But then Lillian makes a soft coughing noise, and a look of deep horror rushes over Lena’s face as she looks over from Kara to the visage of her mother, dark and batlike in the corner of her formerly sunny kitchen.

“Lena, there’s an FBI agent in your home,” Lillian says, deadpan. It would be funny if Kara didn’t feel like dying.

They go to breakfast because in the process of getting dressed and resolving to burn her FBI t-shirt, Lena’s omelette burns and Kara’s assembled collection of breakfast items get sneered at by Lillian. Apparently Rice Krispies is not a meal to be eaten by anyone with a job over the age of eleven.

“You do have a job, I assume,” Lillian says. Kara doesn’t muster a response, just holds tighter to Lena’s hand as Lillian’s driver takes them over to Salt and Pepper. Lena’s jaw clenches.

“You know, mother, when you insisted on having a key to my place, I thought you’d agree that barging in without warning was a healthy boundary,” Lena says.

“I was in town, and you weren’t answering my calls,” Lillian says, breezily. Watching the two of them talk at each other is sort of like watching Winn and his nerd friends play Pong. Kara isn’t sure how or when to interject.

“You want me to go to that awful gala with Jack, I know,” Lena says. Her head drops against the seat of the car, and her neck rolls as the car moves along. Lillian cocks her head.

“I see now why you didn’t like the idea. You might’ve told me. Surely Kara has a dress suitable for the occasion,” Lillian says. The smile on her face does not meet her eyes. Kara is not inclined to smile back. She just grips Lena’s hand and draws patterns across the back of it, trying to bleed some calm into her. It isn’t clear that it works, but when the car rolls to a stop and Lillian insists they sit in the window seat at the restaurant, exactly where Lena hates to sit because the early morning sun is apparently too bright on her, she gives Kara a small smile.

“What all is good here, then?” Lillian asks. Food is something Kara is capable of talking about to almost anyone, so she gives it a shot, letting Lena take a long drink of water.

“I’m a big fan of the eggs benedict,” Kara says. She feels Lena’s hand arrive on her thigh in a soft, reassuring gesture, and it provokes her to give a smile to Lillian. There’s nothing but a frown in return.

“Certainly not very healthy,” Lillian says. “Lena, I certainly hope you haven’t been eating things as fattening as eggs benedict while you’ve been gallivanting with this one.”

“She eats a lot of kale, actually,” Kara says, dropping her hand under the table and holding Lena’s hand. Lena is rubbing her forehead with her spare hand in much the same gesture as she makes when she’s been staring at blueprints for five hours. Kara likes it then, because Lena with her reading glasses and work face on is cute, susceptible to snuggles, and always open to buying them late-night cheese fries at Devil Dawgs. But this Lena is not as fun.

“That would explain the sallow look,” Lillian says.

Kara knows the definition of the word sallow, definitely read it in her SAT prep classes, and it’s not how she would describe Lena. Lena is gorgeous, has been gorgeous since she stood up on the first day of class and said her name was Lena Luthor and that her favorite book was Siddhartha, and Kara had watched her take studious notes for an hour and a half. She was beautiful the day she kissed Kara in the freezing cold rain on the corner outside McDonalds right after Kara had tried to eat three McNuggets at once. She was beautiful when she came and she was beautiful this morning when she had let Kara keep her in bed for five minutes extra so that they could share sleepy, morning breath kisses. Kara is certain she will be beautiful in graduation robes, and wedding dresses, and holding babies, and solving world hunger.

So she can’t help but take offense.

“I’m going to the restroom,” Lena says. She stands abruptly. Kara watches her go with some worry. It’s too early in the morning for Lena to be crying about anything, but it looks all the same like she might be about to when she turns the corner into the restroom.

When she looks back to the table, Lillian is looking at her.

“So, a journalism major,” Lillian says. Kara stares at her. Apparently the spate of silence is too long. “Are you going to speak? Or stare?”

“Yes,” Kara says. Frustration is thrumming through her, an old anger that’s mostly quelled when she’s around Lena, absorbing the atmosphere of Lena. Her therapist used to call it orphan anger, which had seemed sometimes crass, but usually just as descriptions go.

“Which one?” Lillian asks. She smiles, takes a sip of her water. Kara feels her hand as though it were separate of her body reach up to grip the edge of the table.

“Why are you such a jerk to her?” Kara asks. She leans a quarter of the way over the table to make sure that no one overhears her disrespecting what is supposedly an adult.

“I’m sorry?” Lillian asks. She looks intrigued, like Kara has said something surprising and she’s halfway interested in hearing what else she has to say. Or like how people look at puppies barking at mirrors. Like it’s amusing. It makes Kara feel crazy.

“She is so - good, and she tries so hard to impress you when she doesn’t even need to, and you’re such a jerk,” Kara says. “Why?”

She doesn’t mean for it to sound so impassioned and sad, but that’s how it comes out, and it makes Lillian smile very gently.

“I don’t think you know your place,” Lillian says. “Perhaps you should find it.”

“My place is with Lena,” Kara says, and she smacks the edge of the table so hard that the water glasses shiver. “I’m with her. And you know what? She doesn’t need you.”

“I want what’s best for my daughter,” Lillian says.

“So do I,” Kara says. “And that includes you not being a jerk.”

“You may not understand Lena and I’s relationship, but I do care about her,” Lillian says. She leans back in her seat like she’s won something. Kara almost stands up and swings, but instead she chooses to reach into her lap and place her napkin on the table in front of her, standing slowly.

“I’m going to go check on her and make sure she isn’t crying because you’re a jerk,” Kara says. “When I come back, you can either be gone or in a fifty percent better mood, which I’m sure is the best your robot heart can manage, or else I’m going to make my friend James who works here drop hollandaise on your stupid, jerky head.”

Lillian stares at her. James, who’s just arrived at the table to take their drink order, stares at her. She brushes back him with a very dark look that has him scurrying backward.

She finds Lena in the women’s restroom, leaned up against the sinks and staring at the ceiling as though it might collapse down upon her. There’s no hesitation in wrapping her arms around Lena, pressing kisses up the column of her neck until she starts giggling and pushing Kara away.

“I’m sorry I left you out there,” Lena says, reaching up and pressing her long fingers into either side of Kara’s jaw, pulling her down into a quick kiss. It’s something like cool rain after an oppressive heat, kissing Lena right now in this restaurant bathroom after yelling at her mother. The sinks are fancy and the lights are bright and her mother is decidedly not here.

“It’s alright,” Kara says. “I left her out there. I’m sure that’s not in the etiquette books.”

“I read the etiquette books,” Lena says, kissing her again. “It was not in the etiquette books.”

“Is making out in this bathroom in the etiquette books?” Kara asks. Lena kisses her and keeps kissing her, and they super make out for a solid thirty seconds before Lena draws back with a sigh.

“As much as I want to keep breaking the rules of etiquette books, we should probably go out there and suffer through,” Lena says. She keeps pressed close to Kara, and Kara keeps holding onto her. She loves feeling Lena. Loves Lena. She had been meaning to tell her so.

“Your mother sucks,” Kara says. “But just think. When we get married, I can hand deliver the invitation and I’ll dunk it on her the way Winn does with his 64 controller when he wins at Mario Kart.”

“Oh, when we get married?” Lena asks. She’s smiling so pretty that Kara can’t think of the words inside her brain even though she’s real smart sometimes. So she just leans forward and kisses Lena again. “It’s only been three months, Danvers.”

“If you ever think of breaking up with me, just know that whoever you date after me will not dunk your wedding invitation in her face,” Kara says.

“I suppose we can’t break up, then,” Lena says, smiling.

“Probably not,” Kara says.

It takes them five more minutes to get out of the bathroom, and Lena is even smiling when she sits down again, her hand wound up in Kara’s. Lillian is still there, and Kara feels like she needs to mime buckling in. She settles for taking a drink of her mimosa, which James has taken the liberty of delivering for her without even her ordering. She’s glad they’re all still friends.

“I apologize, Lena,” Lillian says. She sounds like someone is holding a gun to her back and she’s swallowed a razor, but Kara grins as wide as she pleases. She does not elaborate, but Lena looks nearly stunned. Kara squeezes her hand. “Tell me about…journalism, Kara.”

Kara does.

[modernwitchcoven]

how are each of the ROs in a relationship?like how do they show affection towards the MC and so on

I kinda mushed this up into a mix of what type of lover each RO is and what each RO would do as an act of affection bc hey, if you wanna know about each romance then the best way I can explain it is to let y’all experience it yourselves :^) (and also bc I’m trying my utmost best to maintain a sense of mystery about everything bc dammit guys how can I write a mystery when y’all are making me spill the beans without even trying hard :”)) )

Peter’s a hopeless romantic and a big kid at heart. If he’s in love with you then he’s in love with you. He’s definitely the type who would knock on your door with a bouquet of flowers on the first date and 100% the type to run up and kiss you passionately after winning a game. Would send you a wholesome meme at 3AM because it reminded him of you.

Emil is an enigmatic lover. It would take days upon days to figure out how his mind works, in a romantic context. One day he’d tuck a strand of loose hair behind your ear whilst reciting one of the romantics. Another day he’d say nothing to you the whole day but would leave an assortment of flowers on your doorstep for you to figure out what they mean. You can say he’s big into symbolism and intention, rather than words and physical intimacy. Also a rich bitch and would spoil you to death.

Jackson is a more physical lover. His route actually consist of teaching him to experience beyond physical intimacy. Once you get past that bring past and finally won that McLovin’ he’d literally fight anyone for you. The sun? Bring it. Your brother buys you a happy meal? Well he’s bought you TWO happy meals, a cheeseburger and the 20-piece chicken mcnuggets. Competitive and protective. Would definitely fall into the “i love you more” trap.

Clyde is a private lover. He’s not the kind of guy that word declare his love out loud or tell you in public how much he cares for you. The most he can do in terms of PDA is hold your hand or keep an arm wrapped around your waist but when there are no prying eyes, he lets everything come apart. Also completely down for a late night dmc on the phone or in person. Rich bitch #2. Would also spoil the hell out of you.

Angela is also like Peter. She would 200% put every ounce of her soul into loving her significant other. A very touchy feely kind of lover, even more than Peter, but at times her love can become a bit overbearing. She’s a cup overflowing with love and she never had anyone to give it to, so be patient with her. Would send you playlists of songs that remind her of you.

Noor is a big fan of photography and gardening. As an act of affection she’d probably take you out for a little picnic in the garden and take pictures of you as a pair to compile into one big album. Other than that, she’d help you with small things such as assignments or cooking dinner. She not much of a talker so her words of adoration are a rare thing to experience. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you at all!!! She’s just happy letting you know that no words can properly convey her feelings for you.

Carlos is a lover who is learning. As an incubus, he’s meant to indulge in pleasure over emotions so at times his more emotional side comes off as a little hesitant. There is still a trace of humanity within him – eons ago – from his years as a human so the concept of love and affection is not completely foreign to him. He just needs time.

G. would be a more thoughtful kind of lover. More than the rest of the cast. They’d be down for whispering words or encouragement, sending soft smiles and telling you a cheesy joke whenever they could. Definitely a mood booster. Adores you and would [spoiler ;);)):)] regardless of whether you love them romantically or in a platonic way or not even at all. You are and will always be number one in their heart.

[fabulouslyphan]

Happy Meals and Happy Days

"Could I get a chicken nugget happy meal please?" A deep voice asked as Dan tapped at the register. He glanced up at the customer, analysing him with a deep but quick stare. Tapping out the order methodically, he took in the strangers porcelain white skin and striking blue eyes, which seemed even brighter when framed by the black strands of hair falling gently to one side of them.

"What drink would you like?" Dan asked, finger hovering over the bright tabs on the screen. He stood up straighter as the other man considered his options, trying to judge who was taller. It was a close call, but Dan reckoned he had an inch or two more. This made him weirdly happy, considering his above average height had him taller than most people anyway.

"Just a coke, I think, please." The stranger finally decided, pulling Dan out of his trance and a card out of his peculiar looking phone case. A closer glance revealed it was patterned with Shiba Inus, which pulled a grin from Dan's sleep deprived state as he passed over the card reader.

"It'll be five minutes if that's okay?" Dan said, refreshing the till and flicking his eyes up to meet the blue tinted gaze of the man across from him.

"Yeah of course, that's fine!" A smile lit up his face like a firework on New year's Eve, and Dan could've sworn his heart stopped for a second.

"Much thank." Dan quipped, no filter on his mouth as he appreciated the customers face. "Wait no!" He corrected himself, face palming violently. A laugh broke him from his embarrassment, and he peeked between his fingers to see the man clutching his chest as he laughed, his tounge poking out minutely between his teeth.

"You just made my day ... Daniel." A quick glance at the badge pinned carefully to Dan's chest helped finish his sentence. "Thanks for that." He turned to walk away before spinning on his heel suddenly, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Or should I say much thank?" He winked, finally moving to stand in the waiting area.

Dan put together the meal, cheeks a vibrant red from his embarrassment. PJ sidled up to him, an obvious grin on his oddly stunning face.

"Channeling your inner memelord, I see? Is he cute? Scratch that, he must be if you're willing to make a meal, I know you prefer to work at the till." At this point, Dan was sure if he got any hotter he'd spontaneously combust. Resolutely ignoring PJ, he put some nuggets into a bag, pausing before placing an extra two in when PJ wasn't looking. He grabbed a pen, drawing a Lenny face onto the box, where it would be obvious to the intended audience. He finally went back to the counter, handing over the box to the customer, a peachy glow and red patch on his cheeks the only reminder of the bright colour that had graced them before.

"Thanks, Daniel." The raven haired man said, hugging the box to his chest.

"Call me Dan." He grinned, winking before he watched the man leave. Once he was out of the door, Dan sighed deeply, going back to watching the hands on the clock ticking by. The early hour of the morning had never felt so obvious.

~~~~~~~

"Voldemort, nine o'clock!" PJ called over to Dan, moving away from the till.

"What are you on about?" Dan laughed, taking his place at the till before realising what he was talking about.

"You know who!" PJ's disembodied voice carried through the almost empty kitchen easily, quickly bringing a blush to Dan's cheeks.

"Hello again." A smile made its way across his face as he made eye contact with the guy he'd dubbed 'Mystery Man' in his head.

"Hi." He replied, grinning back at him. "Could I get a chicken nugget happy meal please?" Dan nodded, tapping the respective buttons on the screen.

"Which drink would you like? A coke again?" He asked, flushing a deeper colour as he realised he'd revealed that he remembered the order. Mystery Man smirked, his eyes twinkling as he nodded, pulling his card out of a Shrek wallet this time. Dan almost laughed out loud, instead muffling it by clearing his throat as he passed over the card machine.

He went through the same process as yesterday, adding the extra nuggets and a reference to a meme in permanent marker. This happened the next day, and the next, until it had been a good three weeks of Mystery Man turning up and ordering a chicken nugget happy meal at 3am, before having a short conversation with Dan, usually referencing memes. Other than the few days when he'd been ill (or so he said when he came back) the almost-stranger, who's name Dan still hadn't managed to catch, was in there every night, 3am on the dot.

Until one fateful day, in late October. It was early evening, and for some godforsaken reason, Dan wanted chicken nuggets. It was ridiculous! He worked at MacDonalds for hours every night, living off the food there during his shift, and yet here he was, craving those bloody mcnuggets. Tugging on a black hoodie, he trudged through the streets to the other MacDonalds, having had his fill of PJ for the day that morning.

Walking up to the counter, Dan barely glanced at the bespectacled man with a quiff who stood at the counter, instead focusing on the nametag attached to his chest. Phil. A good name, he thought, before he was pulled from his thoughts by an audible gasp. His head snapped up and he visibly jumped when he realised who was stood there.

"Dan?"

"Mystery Man?" The two names spilled from their lips simultaneously, a matching look of shock plastering their faces.

"Wait, mystery man?" Phil asked, crooking his head to one side slightly.

"I forgot to ask your name, " Dan admitted shyly. " So I made it up. I was going to go with Mo, but it felt wrong." He grinned slightly as he searched Phil's familiar features.

"Well, Dan, what would you like?" Phil smiled a teasing look at Dan as he waited for his answer.

"Could I get a...chicken nugget happy meal with coke please?" Dan asked, the picture of innocence as he gazed at Phil, who had to bite his lip to prevent a laugh from bursting out. He went to pull out his card, but Phil touched his arm, stopping him.

"It's on the house." He winked, pointing Dan to the waiting area as he went to prepare the meal. Dan buzzed with excitement, his foot tapping rhythmically on the floor as he played a silent piano piece on his leg with his fingertips.

When Phil came back, he was missing his apron but had two happy meals and drinks instead. "Shall we?" He guestured to a table, bumping Dan with his hip slightly.

It was the best 'date' (or whatever you would call it) Dan had ever been on. They talked about anything and everything, laughing over bad puns and jokes with their hands just touching on the table, sipping at their drinks in between giggles. Once they were finished, Phil pulled Dan up, linking their fingers. "Mario Kart?"

"Do you even have to ask?" Dan laughed, and they walked the short distance to Phil's flat. Ironically, it was only a few minutes from Dan's, which brought an eruption of giggled from both of them when he pointed it out, the two of them feeling drunk on life.

Once in the apartment, they began to play. Dan won all of the games, his competitive nature clearly shining through. Phil found himself determined to distract him somehow, so when the moment was right, he leaned over, pressing a kiss to his lips. Dan dropped his controller, his character swerving off the road just moments before he would've won. Phil's sailed past, winning first place.

"No fair! That is cheating, straight up cheating." Dan complained, pouting at Phil. Phil leaned back over, pulling Dan's face towards his and kissing the pout away.

"Still complaining?" He asked, gazing into Dan's eyes when they pulled away to breathe.

"Not even a little." Dan said, yanking him over to connect their lips again. Soon, the Xbox went into sleep mode, abandoned as its owner found something much more enjoyable to do with his time. Or should he say, someone.

*****************************

Aaaaah thanks for reading! This is one I wrote a few months ago, and I had to redo bits but I'm quite happy with it I think. My personal life has been a bit full on recently, but there will be another fic out sometime in the next week, a prompt this time, so hopefully you can look forward to that. Once again, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

Belle xoxo

[Don't forget, if you send in a prompt, I can write you a fanfic! Anything'll do!]

[the-blomster]

Jello Biafra VS the Forces of Corruption 5

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and all relation to real individuals is purely coincidental. I am not associated with any of the people named in this work of fiction and this is not intended to reflect negatively upon anyone.

Chapter 5: Jello Tears Down the British Monarchy

Here we find Jello, sitting around NMCDF headquarters, waiting for orders to be given out. He was told that being mayor meant a lot more responsibilities, but it sure doesn’t feel like it. It’s been days since he won the election, and for what? To allow himself no responsibility, to be a puppet of the NMCDF? Prince! Come give Jello his mission before this story gets bland!

Prince stepped into the room. “Jello!” Prince looked down at his colleague. “I know you’ve just become mayor of San Francisco, but news has come up elsewhere.”

“What?” Jello questioned. “I finally become mayor just to get shipped off to some distant place? Where is it you’re disposing of me anyway?”

Prince explained, “We have gotten news of PMRC activity all around England.” He turned to show Jello a computer screen, on which was a sky blue outline of England. The map was dotted in several places where there had presumably been PMRC activity. “We’re sending you on a mission to England to take down their branch of the PMRC and save England from their fatile grasp. You’ll be meeting with an NMCDF associate later today and you two will go to our England branch to investigate.”

“It feels like you’re just trying to get rid of me so that you can run San Francisco with no opposition.” The blue light of the screen echoed off of their faces within the dark corridors.

“Jello, I understand that we may have had a few breaches of trust recently, but I assure you that every action the NMCDF takes is done with only the best intentions.”

“Well… ok, I guess I can trust you just this once.

“Good! Pack your things! Your meeting with our associate is in a few hours.”

Several hours later…

We find Jello on a street corner. Standing next to him is one familiar face and one unfamiliar face. That familiar one would be Prince, and that unfamiliar one would be a spikey-haired fellow, whose name is unknown to us. He wore a sleeveless shirt and skinny jeans with a chain on their side. He seemed a true, dignified punk-rocker.

“Hello,” said Jello, “My name is Jello Biafra, I do not believe I have made your acquaintance before, but I am pleased to make it.”

“I am John Lyndon, but most people know me as Johnny Rotten, it is a pleasure to meet you.” The most noticeable thing about Johnny Rotten was his voice. He sported a thick British accent, but unlike the average British accent, which came off as upper class and dignified, his accent gave off an air of raw power. The unfiltered nature of his voice fit his aesthetic to a tee.

“Good,” Prince interjected, “Now that our introductions are complete, let’s go over the plan. You two will fly to London, but you must pose as non-NMCDF forces, since PMRC agents are crawling all over the airports. Once you’re in London, you’ll rendezvous with NMCDF agents who will take you to England headquarters. You got all that?”

Johnny and Jello nodded their heads.

“Good,” Prince replied, “Here are your fake passports. If anyone at that airport finds out you are punk rock musicians you’ll get arrested immediately. Be careful!”

In a few hours, Johnny and Jello found themselves on a plane, headed to London, breeding ground for pro-censorship pricks like the PMRC.

Jello breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m really glad we made it onto the plane without much trouble.”

Johnny chuckled. “Once you’ve made this trip as many times as I have you kinda forget how dangerous it is.”

“Really?” Jello questioned. “How many times have you travelled between London and San Francisco?”

“Hmm…” Johnny rubbed his chin. “I’d say about ten. Probably more.”

“Wow. What inspired you to pursue such a dangerous line of work?”

“I am a man who is bound to his ideals,” Johnny explained, “If I did not fight for the things I believed in then I would see no purpose in living.

“And what would those ideals be?”

“Well, growing up in a society like England, a society whose basis is a long history of classicism, I believed strongly that all people should be treated as equals, and that no class structure, whether intentional or unintentional, should exist. England is also a very pro-censorship place. They want everything to be all clean and they want to ignore all the bad stuff in this world. It’s a detriment being raised in a place like that, and if the PMRC gets a hold of England, then all that stuff can only get worse.”

“How inspiring,” Jello replied.

“What about you?” Johnny asked, “What inspired you to join the NMCDF?”

“Well…” Jello took a few moments to think. “I’m not really sure I ever made the decision to join the NMCDF. I just kinda got sucked into it. You know… One day I’m jamming out to some punk rock and then the next day I’m in Alcatraz. The NMCDF was the only way out for me. I have my regrets about joining, I have my disagreements with Prince, and I often question the exclusivity of the filthy fifteen, but at the end of the day I don’t think I regret a thing.”

“I think most NMCDF members can relate to that sentiment in some form or another. Oh look.” Johnny turned his attention to the window. “It looks like it’s almost time for us to land. We’re making a connection so when we’re off of the plane we have to extra careful.”

Much of the time spent during their connection passed without event, but, an hour or so before their next flight was supposed to leave, Jello attempted to order a twenty piece chicken mcnugget from McDonalds, but he accidently gave them his personal credit card. As he handed his card to the cashier, he recognized his mistake, but it was already too late, the PMRC had been alerted to his location.

Instantly, all of the lights in airport turned red and loud sirens wailed from every conceivable direction. Secret passageways opened up in the floors and walls opened up, revealing hundreds, if not thousands of PMRC agents clad in riot gear began pouring forth into the corridors.

Jello and Johnny immediately regrouped as the agents closed in on them.

“What are we going to do?” Jello asked.

“We just have to fight them off!” Johnny replied.

At that moment, an agent came running towards the two, but before he could reach them, Johnny did his signature Rotten Roundhouse Kick, sending the agent flying backwards, knocking out other PMRC agents like bowling pins. Eventually, the agent crashed through the viewing window, giving the two a clear path to the runway.

“Now’s our chance!” Johnny shouted.

The two made a mad dash towards the runway. Just as the two were about to leap down onto the concrete a member of the PMRC hoard latched onto Johnny’s leg. Jello stared in horror as his friend slowly became consumed by the mass of PMRC agents.

“Run!” Johnny shouted, “Save yourself!” Jello clenched his fists. “No! I will not cower in fear to the PMRC!” He straightened his hands and committed several hundred supersonic jabs against dozens of opponents in mere seconds. A large circle of safety was spread around the two, giving them just enough time to escape. They ran to one of the many planes surrounding them, and resumed their flight to London.

It’s not how they expected to be getting to London, but now Johnny Rotten and Jello Biafra are flying themselves to England. How will they land without encountering the PMRC in England? Who is heading the PMRC branch in England? How powerful are the foes they will face? Find out in the next chapter of Jello Biafra VS the Forces of Corruption!

[chaplainamerica316us]

                    WANTED ON THE DINNER PLATE DEAD OR ALIVE?

                                 By Chaplain America 193 Dec 3 2020

 “Marshall Apple! Marshall Apple the Junk Food Gang just road into town and their a gunnen for ya.”

“Well those no-good unhealthy bushwhackers need to go right away. Deputy Broccoli go round up the Vegetable Brothers and Doc Blueberry and have them meet us over by the I'm OK Corral.”

“You got it Marshall I'm on my way!!!”

Well The Junk Food Gang was made up of 6 of the meanest most unhealthiest junk foods around, there was mean old Curly Cheese Fries McGee and then there's old Jake McNuggets  and Charlie Jumbo Jack McGraw followed up by his three younger brothers Big Mac With Bacon, Jasper Cheeseburger Fry's and Coke and last but not least the youngest brother of this unhealthy gang of junk food, Tommy Taco Supreme With Extra Sour Cream.

Well the rest of the story goes something like this, the good ole healthy foods came a walking down the street and as they turned the corner by the I'm OK Corral there they were the Junk Food Gang staring them right in the face, Well the Junk Food Gang drew first and they pelted Marshall Apple and the Healthy Foods Posse with MnMs and Skittles. Things looked pretty bad for the Healthy Food Posse, it looked like The Junk Food Gang was going to win the day but then from out in the distance I couldn't believe my eyes the Applesauce Dumpling Gang came a riding  into town just a wompen and a yelling and shot the Junk Food Gang full of string bean holes and down they went.

I tell you it was exciten and that day Marshall Apple and the boys became a legend in these parts, healthy foods had won the day which meant that everybody in the town of Good Diet would continue to eat healthy, prosper and live a long life, God bless you all from Chaplain Paul 193.  John 14:27

 Now a very Insightful message by Pastor Ken titled, Wanted Dead or Alive

Are you eating live food or dead food? if you keep eating dead food you might become what you eat. Did God give dead food or live food for us to eat? God is love and life I ask you is a Twinkie alive or dead?  What about an avocado? KJV Genesis 1:29 And God said, “Behold I have given you every herb bearing seed which is upon the face of all the earth and every tree in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed, to you it shall be for meat. KJV Genesis 2:16 Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat. (live food.)

John 10:10-11 The thief does not come except to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come that they may have life and that they may have it more abundantly.

I am the Good Shepherd The Good Shepherd gives his life for the sheep.

[auburnfamilynews]

Political rookie goes to Washington.

As expected tonight, former Ole Miss, Texas Tech, and Cincinnati head football coach Tommy Tuberville, who lived off of a government paycheck in his previous positions, will continue to live off of a government paycheck as he wins the race for U.S. Senate in Alabama tonight over incumbent (who??) Doug Jones.

BREAKING: Republican Tommy Tuberville wins election to U.S. Senate from Alabama, beating incumbent Sen. Doug Jones. #APracecall at 9:10 p.m. CST. #Election2020 #ALelection https://t.co/lGfinjTqT4

— AP Politics (@AP_Politics) November 4, 2020

Oh, but there’s an Auburn connection here as well! In case you didn’t know, Tuberville happened to spend a decade in our little town coaching the intercollegiate football squad. I think we’ve got some grainy footage here —

Wow, who knew? Seems like a special time from a long gone era. Either way, he’s in a completely different role now in the state of Alabama, so let’s review some of the concerns we’ve got with the new Senator.

TOUGH OPPONENTS TO START: Tuberville wins the seat as a Republican, so he’ll have to deal with established Washington Democratic players like Senate Minority Leader Chuck Shumer, and his colleagues (and former Presidential candidates) Bernie Sanders, Elizabeth Warren, and Amy Klobuchar. It remains to be seen how he’ll handle working hand in hand with the opposition instead of grinding things to a halt, like what happened in 1999 when his Auburn team was set to play Florida State.

CRONYISM: During his time at Auburn, Tuberville came under fire for his loyalty to a certain cadre of assistant coaches known colloquially as the BBQ Buddies (or Gang, or Crew, you get the idea). Those guys who’d been with him for years, but who may not have been the best performers for the job. It was such that his supremely-talented 2003 Auburn team, that would go on to an undefeated season the next year with essentially the same roster, fell flat in 2003. The reason? Tuberville didn’t search for a new offensive coordinator. He promoted one of his boys, who flubbed the season. He was more loyal to his friends than to Auburn. Will he be more loyal to his friends than to his state and country? 2003 was only mildly saved when an outside consultant was brought in (imagine that happening now) and then when Tuberville finally went outside of his comfort zone to hire Al Borges from Indiana. To tell you the truth, this may actually work in his favor in politics.

WILTING IN THE FACE OF A TRUE CHALLENGE: How can we know that Tubs won’t bolt when the going gets tough? In the offseason after 2006, Tommy Tuberville’s job got a good bit more difficult when Alabama fired Mike Shula and hired Nick Saban from the Miami Dolphins. Saban came in, worked hard, and dominated the in-state recruiting. Furthermore, he developed those players once they got to Tuscaloosa. Tuberville’s strength was always as a player developer, but he would look for the diamonds in the rough, so to speak, and coach them up. When you’re coaching up 3-star players, and your opponent is better at coaching up 5-star players, it’s not going to end well for you. Instead of hitting the recruiting trail when Alabama was down, Tuberville won the SEC once with a great team, but had the talent to win it from 2002-2006. He should have had Alabama in the grave when Saban was hired, but it took them one full year to get back to top strength.

POOR PLANNING: This ties in with the above, but Tuberville’s god-awful recruiting efforts after 2007 are what led Auburn to endure the lull toward the end of Gene Chizik’s tenure. Give Tubs credit for the offensive line class of 2007, which helped win a national title in 2010, but that’s it. Only a couple of those guys even saw practice squad time in the NFL, and nobody else that he recruited after that point got drafted. Cam Newton was throwing to three-star receivers and destroying the SEC. Imagine if he’d had a Julio Jones type. If Tuberville hadn’t been let go after 2008, then he would’ve led Auburn to a crumbling collapse in subsequent years. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that if Gus Malzahn had the benefit of an Alabama team as bad as Tuberville did, we’d have a couple national championships and far better talent.

RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE CURRENT BUYOUT STRUCTURE IN COLLEGE ATHLETICS: When Tuberville lost 36-0 to Alabama in 2008, and Auburn missed a bowl game for the first time since 1999, he “resigned”, but somehow received a $5.1M buyout, with $3M payable within 30 days of his departure and the rest due within a year. That was the start of what we see now. You know when folks talk about getting rid of Gus and we have to wonder where we’d get $21M? That started with Tommy Tuberville.

Those are some serious strikes against the man who will now help represent the state of Alabama in the U.S. Senate. What has Tommy Tuberville said that he wants to accomplish when he gets to Washington? His campaign issues page reads like a McNuggets box of conservative talking points, but there’s no subtance. No solutions, just complaining.

I’m shocked that we don’t see the following issues on the link above:

THE BCS: The got-dang system that screwed him and allowed the SEC to receive the benefit of the doubt years later never really paid off for Auburn. Tuberville got the short end of the stick with the BCS in 2004, but he never coached in a situation where he would’ve been in contention for the College Football Playoff.

ARKANSAS/HOUSTON NUTT: Dang Hawg Hex! Arkansas was the bugaboo for Tuberville for years during his early days. Fred Talley, Matt Jones, those guys usually ruined what was a promising season for Auburn. Arkansas cost Auburn at least two SEC West titles in 2002 and 2006. It’s not the first time that a folksy guy in Arkansas messed things up for Republicans...

BOBBY LOWDER: I wonder how much money Tubs has in FlightTracker’s current stock. It’s essentially what saved his job in 2003. After losing like he had in his first couple of seasons, especially to one of the worst Alabama teams in recent memory, nobody really blamed the Auburn powers for trying to replace him. If they hadn’t done it secretly, then it wouldn’t have been such a problem.

INSOLENT STUDENTS: See below —

CHUBBY MATT STAFFORD/REGGIE BALL: Why aren’t these criminals in jail for their crimes against Auburn? Somehow Tuberville had no idea how to plan against these two quarterbacks and Auburn went a combined 0-5 against them during Tubs’ tenure. Georgia Tech was awful with Reggie Ball, but we couldn’t seem to figure out a way to beat them. Matt Stafford is a little more excusable, but in 2006 when Auburn was still in the hunt for a national title in November, Stafford ran all over Auburn as a freshman for an unranked Georgia squad.

Seriously, don’t you wonder why Tuberville isn’t more beloved by people involved with Auburn? He’s got a dominant record against Alabama and the 2004 season under his belt, but he’s not the most cherished ex-coach we’ve got. Now he’s helping run the country.

from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2020/11/3/21547388/former-ole-miss-coach-tommy-tuberville-wins-senate-seat-in-alabama